#I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS

[tardxsblues]

We don't need heaven, we don't need hell. They're toxic. We need to get away from them -- just be an us.

[sukunasdirtylaugh]

"you know I'd do anything for you."

"ken..."

"I mean it," the yakuza boss persists, leaning forward as the two of you sit in the comfort of your shared matrimonial bed, 4 months of marriage with yet no arguments to be seen (to the surprise of everyone around you: maids, friends, your mother, and you). kento has been all the accommodating in this transition. even when he knew half your heart did not want to settle in like this, in this world.

"you don't have to say that," you hope the softness in your voice can lessen the weight of your words, "we don't have to do this... thing,"

"does my desire to put myself at your will make you uncomfortable?"

"i-it's not that-"

"then will you allow me?" he asks, "not as my wife, but as you," the way he says your name makes your heart skip a beat, your throat contracts as he leaves you with a question you were not expecting.

"I don't know what you're asking of me." you almost flinch when he sighs, fearing you've made this entirely worse, but at your question, your husband takes your hands in his.

"allow me to join you for brunch," you know exactly what he means by this. every saturday, you liked to eat outside the porch. with a book in hand or a pen, you used these objects as a means of comfort.

you now realize he was trying to be the same.

"okay," you breathe, sighing shakily as you nod. "do you... want to start tomorrow?" he nods.

"I'd like that, thank you."

[thepagemistress]

Cas doesn't really use pet names for Dean but occasionally he will call him something in Enochian that always makes Dean weak in the knees.

And then one day, as Cas is sat by himself in the library, he hears a sudden guffaw ring through the corridor, recognisable as Gabriel's. Followed by a "Dean..." from Sam that is clearly meant to sound placating but instead sounds more like he's trying to hold back a laugh of his own.

Footsteps beat down the corridor, swiftly approaching the library as Dean blusters his way in. Spotting Cas immediately, he throws his arms wide.

"Your pet name for me is 'human'?!"

Cas simply stares back at Dean, completely unmoved. "You call me angel. Frequently."

"Yeah, but..." he splutters. Hesitates. Flusters.

Cas raises an eyebrow and waits.

Dean scowls back at him, red-faced, points a threatening finger at him and then just...turns on his heel and flees the room.

Cas's lips twitch in a smile as he turns back to his book.

[blondwhowrites]

Mattheo, in a modern AU, is the rich bad boy everyone wants to fuck. He's the whole package, good looks, a whole lot of daddy issues, and he gets into fights every other day. He's never seen without a cigarette in his mouth, and he's been caught multiple times fooling around with girls in empty closets. He's a total asshole, and he knows it—does he care? Nope. He parties hard and doesn't give a single shit about anything. He lived like that until his third year of college when you came stumbling into his life. You had managed to snag one of the best scholarships at the most prestigious colleges in England. The only downside is that you're surrounded by rich, snobby assholes half the time, and your will to live is slowly crumbling. You live in a shitty, small, apartment, and the only friend you have is a girl named Pansy—the platonic love of your life. She's filthy rich, and she insists that you meet her friends, who are also filthy rich and apparently are the most infamous group at the school. You quite literally crashed into Mattheo at a small get-together Pansy had dragged you to. He sees you for the first time, and it's love at first sight. You're on the brink of tears because your day was so bad, and now you've bumped into someone, and the bar is overwhelming, and all you want to do is go back to your shitty apartment and play Roblox. And something inside him clicks at that moment—

Holy shit you're perfect

[konigsblog]

simon riley's the man to tease you, calling you silly names that are so loving and adoring, an inside joke between the two of you.

perhaps he'll call you sugar because of that time you spilt sugar all over the ground, desperately trying to clean it all up without him knowing because you thought he'd think you were stupid...

although, simon just shook his head chucking and vacuumed it up instead, watching you pick up every grain of sugar was making him die on the insides.

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Eddie: Permission to date your platonic soulmate, Buckley?

Robin: Permission denied!

Eddie: Why?!

Robin: I just watched you shave your eyebrows out of pure boredom!

Eddie: It wasn't because of boredom! It was because you told me that all eyebrows look like caterpillars! You know caterpillars freak me out!

Robin: That was days ago, and I was high!

Eddie: And I've been having nightmares ever since! So. . .let me get this straight. . . I can't ask out your best friend because I shaved my eyebrows?

Robin: I can't take the risk that you won't shave his eyebrows in his sleep.

Eddie: Seriously?

Robin: You are not to go near Steve or his eyebrows. Permission still denied.

Steve walked into Eddie's trailer, carrying bags of food.

Steve: I got the food. . . Eddie, where the fuck are your eyebrows?!

Eddie: *panicked* Robin told me that all eyebrows look like caterpillars!

Steve: Why would you do that? You know he's scared of caterpillars!

Steve disappeared into the bathroom.

Eddie: What are you doing?

Steve: Shaving my eyebrows! The things that I do for you!

Robin: *rolls eyes* Fine! Permission granted, but you never needed it in the first place, *with affection* freak.

Eddie: But Dustin said -

Robin: Dustin was fucking with you!

Eddie: Damnit!

[unreliablesnake]

Schrödinger's girlfriend (Simon "Ghost" Riley x reader)

Soap simply referred to you as Schrödinger's girlfriend.

He had heard the stories about Ghost's girlfriend, the dancer whose videos could be allegedly seen on a dance studio's YouTube channel as well. But the lieutenant never told anyone your or the dance studio's name to make sure no one would start drooling over you.

Price had already told the team that he met you before and you were very much real, but no one else could confirm it. So as long as he didn't see you with his own eyes on Ghost's side, Soap wasn't about to believe you existed.

"Lt., come on, just one video," he tried one time when he found him alone.

Ghost let out an annoyed groan as he looked down at him. "No."

But one time, months after this failed attempt, Price invited his team and their significant others or friends for a drink in a bar. It had been a rough mission, they needed some time to just hang out somewhere and talk about anything but work.

That's when Soap first saw you. He didn't believe it at first, he immediately assumed you were just some tipsy girl flirting with Ghost, but when he pulled down his mask to kiss you, his arm wrapped protectively around you, he knew it had to be you.

"Look at that, you exist," said Soap as he walked over to the pair of you.

Ghost let out a sigh and took a sip of his bourbon. You, on the other hand, looked interested in what he had to say. "You thought he was lying?" you asked sweetly.

Shrugging, Soap extended his hand. "John MacTavish. But everyone calls me Soap."

"Soap? Why Soap?"

"Don't ask," the lieutenant told you as he pulled you a little closer to himself.

"And what's your name?" Soap wondered.

You were just about to answer when your boyfriend interrupted. "Too many questions, Johnny. Her name is classified," he added with a smile before placing a soft kiss on the back of your head. "Why don't you go back to the others and give us some space? I haven't seen her in two months."

"Sure, sure. Have fun," he said before turning to move back to the rest of the team.

A stupid grin was plastered on his face the whole time, and when Gaz asked him what it was all about, he only waved his hand nonchalantly. No big deal, he just saw the woman he had thought wasn't real. But you were real, living and breathing, clearly in love with Ghost.

[snakeredbirdbatkatana]

Before that night Damian could say with certainty that Drake couldn't care less about him.

Damian stands coated in blood and he has no idea how he got here.

When Grandfather had come he knew it was hopeless that he should just go quietly he didn't account for Timothy.

Before he could blink Grandfather was dead.

His brother holding his prized katana which was sticky with blood.

His Brother who wrapped him in his cape and lead him away.

Who bandaged his wounds and sung a lullaby he hadn't heard since Mama.

His brother who is gone and he stands alone like every Wayne before him staring at a grave stone and wishing he could go back in time and change it all.

But unlike every Wayne before him he can.

[inkskinned]

i had a dream last night that i had been born the right way, that i had no trouble listening and made friends easily and straightened my hair and dated only ben from highschool until i got married to him. that our ring was gold even though silver is my color and i don't support diamonds

i had a dream that i hadn't ever been ugly or weird, that we'd had enough money to actually afford the clothes everyone was wearing and in eighth grade i actually twisted my ankle in ugg boots. that all my memories were now diagonally drawn across the river i should have been raised from -

we walked down boston in the chill and i kept talking about how lucky i was to have a wonderful husband and how my father's love poured over our relationship in evergreen gin - i swear sometimes i think he prefers ben - and all the girls that bullied me were now my beautiful friends with husbands and lives of their own, spun out in gold and rhinestones

i had a dream that i hadn't been made wrong, that god had treated me gently, that the hole that opened in me hadn't seeped into everything, staining all of my fingers in chaos and lightning. i had a dream i didn't know secrets about sharp things or how deep the hole goes or how hard someone can hit rock bottom, the snap of the bone.

i had a dream i kept twisting the ring and turning to my oldest friend, who was frowning. barely looking at me. i had a dream i got straight a's and went to a different college but it meant we lost touch after it. she wasn't the same here - strange, unloving, chilly. something is wrong, i kept saying. we were just out for boba tea. my hair was long and pretty and i'd never dyed it enough to turn it frizzy. something is wrong and i think it's with me.

in this world, i still went to church. in this world, i had never been abandoned. in this world, i had never disappointed my parents. in this world, neither she nor i ever kissed girls and meant it. she hadn't met her wife. in this world, nothing ever needed fixing. i didn't ruin things compulsively.

is it worth it? she said, watching me. is it worth it, everything that's missing?

[lishenkaaa]

AITA for ruining a girl's attempts to get with her crush?

I (40s, 5th) died alongside my husband (40s, 5th) a year ago. We were quite upset about it but a few weeks later we found ourselves called into a false reality created in the mind of this girl (18, 9th) we only half knew before we died, who my husband insists I refer to here as "Garrow", along with a few other people we knew before we died including our adopted kids. It took a while but we eventually realised we were trapped here as a result of her attempts to lobotomise herself in order to forget her dead friend/crush "Hideon" (19, 9th) and preserve her soul without consuming it. Recently, however, Garrow almost died, and as a result the false reality holding back her memories of Hideon had begun to break apart and mutate trying to remember Hideon, even almost pulling my kids back into this mortal bubble after I had found a way for them to leave. Here's where I might be the asshole. In order to stop this, my husband and I have had to interrupt the new realities where Garrow attempted to picture a world where her and Hideon could love each other freely. Now that the false realities have stabilised, she says she understands why we did what we did, but I can't help but feel bad since right afterwards she dug her hands into the mattress and cried for Hideon. AITA?

EDIT: For those of you asking why we didn't leave with our kids and remained in the false reality, a vengeful ghost was haunting Garrow and we wanted to help defend herself from it.

[snootlestheangel]

Hear Me Out

Guys, just, hear me out: YouTubers/Streamers AU for COD. There was a series of posts on @cod-dump 's blog about what games are banned for the boys and I've just been thinking about this but with Ghost, Gaz, Soap, and Alex where one of them is the actual streamer/gamer dude and the others just almost always play with him (maybe Roach if we went on the path that he's not actually mute, just kinda hates talking)

Retired or discharged for whatever reasons, the 141 are actually kinda happy to be living semi-normal lives. Maybe they're not all entirely civilian now, maybe Price has a position that doesn't require him to be on the field but he's still teaching/being a Captain.

But he's constantly telling the boys to find things to do to keep themselves happy. Especially Gaz and Soap, cause the military is kind of all they know, they've never had to be civilians really as adults.

Ghost is transitioning fine, and he's been a huge help for Soap, but Gaz is still kinda struggling. Eventually something happens and Alex is part of his life, but it's still not really what Gaz needs to feel "normal".

So Soap and Alex convince Gaz to start streaming/recording videos of their gaming sessions. It's a slow start, and Gaz is getting frustrated.

Until one time they play something silly but incredibly rage-inducing. It's a trending game because it's designed to pit you against your friends but is still silly nonetheless. There's one clip in particular that starts trending and becomes the reason Gaz's channel starts to take off.

The clip? Gaz yelling at Soap for something and Soap immediately just cursing him out in straight Scots only for Alex, an American, to scream into his mic as loud as humanly possible "WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETER?!?!" after having been dead silent for the last 2 minutes. Why did he scream this? Not because of Soap's Scots, but because he had secretly just won the round after having lost the entire time they'd been playing.

People eat that shit up! Suddenly everyone's like "damn there's this hella attractive dude that records gameplay with his friends and they're all really funny." Everyone falls in love with Gaz's appearance first, but then they actually hear him and his friends interact and it's just trading insults and stupid jokes, acting like there's no one watching and they're suddenly kids again.

It eventually comes out that Gaz and his friends are all veterans, and despite the air around military not being the best, there's no denying that caring for veterans is a must. People slowly start to support Gaz's channel/streams, and before he knows it, he's actually got quite the following. His whole thing is about "wanting to do something to distract himself and others from the shitty aspects of life with a few laughs and some good games"

Eventually they convince Ghost to start gaming with them. It makes Gaz's popularity grow because now there's this really deep accent in the mix that's completely clueless as to what he's doing like 90% of the time (I just have this gut feeling that '22 Ghost is so fucking awful at video games) that they refer to simply as "Ghost". Suddenly, the chaos Gaz and his friends are known for increases tenfold. Ghost is flirting with all of them, Soap is arguing with him over literal couple things that come with living together, and there's a new element of really dark humor that wasn't there before (there was dark humor, just not this dark)

They're playing The Backrooms one time. They're not even in the game yet, just in the lobby. Gaz is laughing at Alex's tag for the game "MYLEG!" which is a reference to that one fish in Spongebob always yelling "my leg!" after an incident. Gaz is laughing too hard to actually explain to his viewers that, yes, Alex is an amputee. Soap starts making fun of him, as usual, and that's when it happens.

Alex: "I'll take my leg off and hit you with it, Soap, I swear to god." Soap: "I forgot you were already missing one for a second there and got real concerned." Alex: "No, Soap, I planned on removing my other leg. The one that's still attached, yeah. Just like a lil *pop noise*, ya know?" Gaz: *wheezing so hard he almost throws up*

Then they're playing this silly monster/cryptid hunter game called "A Day Out" and there's skeletons every now and then on the map. Gaz walks up to one and just starts freaking out, saying Ghost's name over and over.

Ghost, freaked out: What?? Gaz, pointing at the skeleton: Look, it's you! *cackling* Ghost, after a concerning long pause: *quietly* Nah, I'm not gonna say that Alex: SAY IT COWARD Ghost: No, that's my brother *Gaz making the most horrified face as he tries not to laugh* *Alex and Soap are losing their shit* Gaz: NAH THAT'S NOT OKAY

That clip posts and the internet looses it. I see this being the actual first video Ghost is in, so for this to be the first thing the viewers get of him, it's safe to say he's a hit. It's also never explained that Ghost does have a deceased brother, so there's just an acceptance of Ghost's skeleton brother.

There's several times where they've all gotten together and played silly games like Mario Kart when there's a bunch of them. There's the sober one and there's the drunk one, where there's so many different languages being hurled as curses at each other, Gaz gives up on captioning ANY of it.

OOOOooooooooohhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! WHAT IF! Roach becomes his editor once he gets popular enough so he can spend more time playing games, solo ones when the others are working.

For a while, everyone's going crazy wanting to see what the others all look like, and sometimes (cause we're assuming the world they live in now during all this is a lot better), they're joined by Rudy or Alejandro, or both in one rare instance. Sometimes, for old times's sake, during the drunk gaming sessions, they'll call Laswell only for her to scold them. There are times they'll bully Roach who always, as the editor, changes their words from the insults to compliments. Or he definitely trolls Gaz a lot with some of the editing, and it's all around just a good time. Hence why everyone wants to know what they look like.

Then it's around the holidays after about 2 and a half years of Gaz's channel being as popular as it is. He posts a single picture on his socials with a group of people and the caption: "Love seeing the boys over the holidays."

It's such a nice photo; Alex with an arm wrapped around Gaz's shoulders, Soap and Ghost on his other side with Roach between Soap and Gaz.

And the internet has once again gone crazy. Why? Cause not only are these dudes fucking hilarious, but they're hot and taken.

Except, as they all end up teasing him about, Roach is very much still single XD

I have been watching too much YouTube lately, can y'all tell?? Haha anyways back to my hole I shall crawl

[ourfavoritetorturedwriter]

[aplaceinme]

It’s in the way that Tommy’s voice gets softer when he says ‘Hey’ to him;

It’s in the way Tommy’s eyes light up whenever he sees him;

It’s in the way that when he calls him ‘Evan’ he feels adored;

It’s in the way that Tommy looks at him fondly, even when he goes on a tangent about whatever topic has caught his attention;

It’s in the way that Tommy always pays attention to what he is saying;

It’s in the way that Tommy understands how important the 118 family is for him;

It’s in the way that Tommy understands when he wants to spend time alone with Maddie, or Chris and Eddie, or anyone else;

It’s in the way that Tommy understands that sometimes he needs to be alone;

It’s in the way that Tommy makes time to spend with him because he wants to see and be with him;

It’s in the way that Tommy messages him with a ‘Good morning’ and a ‘Good night’ every day;

It’s in the way that Tommy always texts him letting him know that he is ok when he’s on a shift, and asking if he is being safe;

It’s in the way that Tommy buys and keeps in his kitchen his favourite snack and beer;

It’s in the way that Tommy surprises him with wonderful dates;

It’s in the way that Tommy joins in his enthusiasm for learning new things and encourages him to try new activities;

It’s in the way that Tommy sometimes kisses him tenderly and sometimes passionately, but both kisses feel as if they are what Tommy needs to keep living;

It’s in the way that Tommy places his hand on the small of his back any chance he gets;

It’s in the way that Tommy will hold his hand or put his arm around his waist when they are in public, but he will always make sure that he is alright with it;

It’s in the way that Tommy hugs him, as if he doesn’t want to ever let go;

It’s in the way that Tommy always draws him closer to his body, needing to be near him;

It’s in the way that Tommy worships his body;

It’s in the way that Tommy cuddles him after;

It’s in the way that Tommy takes care of him after a bad shift;

It’s in the way that Tommy lets him cry on his shoulder;

It’s in the way that Tommy lets him do the same for him;

It’s in the way that Tommy always tries to make him laugh, even if it means making a fool of himself;

It’s in the way that Tommy tells him his dreams and hopes for the future;

It’s in the way that Tommy tells him about his past, trusting that he won’t be judged;

It’s in the way that Tommy makes him feel like he can truly be himself with him…

They haven’t said ‘I love you’ yet, but Buck feels it anyway in everything that Tommy says and does. Buck has been looking for this type of love all his life, and he has finally found it.

[t4tadrienette]

Rip Gabriel Agreste, teach the angels how to throw children

[spaceman-earthgirl]

This made me laugh and I decided to make it supercorp.

---

Lena knocks, but doesn’t bother waiting for a response before she lets herself into Sam’s apartment. She makes a beeline straight for the couch, drops backwards onto it with an exasperated huff.

“Hello to you too,” Sam calls from somewhere Lena can’t see her. She appears at the end of the couch a moment later, a bottle of wine and two glasses in hand. “What happened?”

Lena sighs as she sits up, there are currently too many emotions running through her, she definitely needs a drink.

“Did the gym this evening not go well?” Sam prompts, concern furrowing her brow.

Lena takes a big sip from the glass Sam passes her before she speaks. “I had a plan, I was going to finally figure out her name,” Lena starts.

Six months. Six months Lena has been working out with the same girl at the gym and she still doesn’t know her name. At the beginning it hadn’t mattered, she hadn’t even realised she didn’t know her name until Sam had asked her and Lena had realised she didn’t know. She’d just been calling her ‘gym girl’, a name that’s stuck around for months as her efforts to figure out the girl’s name have failed.

It started with asking for her number so they could plan their workouts, but the girl had added her name as “Gym Buddy” to her phone, a little emoji of an arm flexing its bicep beside it.

Her next attempt was to ask for her Instagram, which worked, in a sense. She found the girl’s Instagram account, and she may have spent way too long scrolling through it because her gym buddy is hot. Like insanely hot. Like she gets distracted when working out sometimes because the girl really is the most beautiful person she’s ever seen. But that’s not the point right now, the point is that the girl’s name all over her social media is ‘Supergirl’ and that really doesn’t help her issue.

Lena had even managed to get her email address, and still, it gave away no clues.

And now it’s been six months and she just wants to know her name, wants to know the name of the person she has the world’s biggest crush on.

They text all the time, talk on the phone even more than she does with Sam, she sees her most days of the week at the gym and still, no name. At this point, it’s just getting ridiculous that she doesn’t know, and she’s definitely way too far in it now to ask, especially after what happened earlier.

“You know you could just ask her, right?” Sam says.

It’s a common suggestion from Sam, one she’s never going to take. She’s in too deep now, it’s been too long, she doesn’t want her friend to find out she doesn’t even know her name.

She’d thought about asking someone else, the girl is well known around the gym, her sister the owner, but she didn’t want it getting back to her that she didn’t know her name. Everyone just calls her “Sunny D”. Lena’s not even sure if that’s a reference to her first or last name. It’s definitely a reference to the girl’s personality, she lights up any room she’s in.

But that’s where today’s issue comes in. “I did, sort of.”

Sam sits up straighter, suddenly looking more interested in the conversation. “Wait, what? Did you figure out her name?”

“No,” Lena groans.

“Then I’m confused.”

Lena’s hands reach up to cover her face, so her next words are muffled. “I asked someone else to talk to her, and it did not go as planned.”

“I could’ve told you that wouldn’t work.” Lena can hear that Sam is trying not to laugh, and she drops her hands to glare at her best friend. “Okay, sorry. Tell me what happened.”

“There was a girl at the gym,” Lena says, starting from the beginning. “Someone I didn’t recognise.” She spends a lot of her free time at the gym now, she recognises all the regulars. “So, I started talking to her, her name is Nia, she was really sweet. Anyway, gym girl was across the room and I asked Nia if she could do me a favour and go and ask what her name is.”

“That doesn’t sound as easy as just asking gym girl yourself but I’m assuming she didn’t do it. What, was Nia interested in you, or something?“ Sam’s eyes widen. “Oh no, don’t tell me you inadvertently set the two of them up?”

“No.” God, she hadn’t even thought of that happening. The outcome she got was much more embarrassing, even if it went far differently, and entirely better than she thought it would. “Nia thought I was interested in gym girl, and that’s how she phrased it when asking for her name.”

Sam’s trying not to laugh again. “Oh no.”

“Oh yes.”

Her cheeks burn now, just as they did at the time. She can still see clearly in her mind, the way Nia had smiled and pointed in her direction. She couldn’t hear what they said but she saw the confusion on gym girl’s face morph into a brilliant smile before she made her way across the gym to Lena.

“I heard you think I’m cute.”

Lena definitely hadn’t said that to Nia, and she’d been about to try and smooth over whatever damage Nia had done, before gym girl’s next words had nearly made her fall over with the surprise of it.

“Have dinner with me tomorrow night?”

Sam sobers. “Are you okay? I know how much you like her.”

Lena swallows, her frown breaking into a smile for the first time since she arrived. “I’m kind of great, actually?”

Sam frowns, clearly trying to puzzle together the sudden shift in Lena’s mood. “What?”

“I…” Lena can’t stop smiling now, it still hasn’t quite sunk in. “After talking to Nia, gym girl asked me out.”

Sam bursts out laughing. “Oh my God, that’s great! Not where I expected this story to go but good for you.”

Lena laughs too, except she still has one problem. “I have a date with gym girl tomorrow night, but I still don’t know her fucking name.”

(She figures out Kara’s name on their first date, completely by chance because Kara booked the table reservation under her name.

It’s definitely more than just a crush because after Kara walks her home, right when she’s pretty sure Kara is about to kiss her goodnight, Lena admits the truth, admits why Nia spoke to her, admits that she’s spent months trying to figure out her name and only just discovered it tonight.

Kara thinks it’s incredibly funny and can’t believe Lena didn’t just ask her herself. But they both agree that it worked out well since it got them a date.

And then Kara does kiss her, and Lena forgets her own name).

[walnutmistjamie]

Merry Christmas 🎄