#Human Domestication Guide

[slylittleprincess]

I want you to try something for me.

Try looking up for a moment in whatever room or space you’re in right now and just imagine what a creature double your size would actually be like. Perhaps they would have to hunch over just to fit. They certainly wouldn’t get through the door without significant compression.

Imagine what a creature double your width would be like. A creature that size would carry themselves with a sense of scale, a sense of magnitude that would be humbling to observe. It would feel powerful, dangerous perhaps.

Imagine that creature was made entirely of flora, lush waxy leaves and flowers. A face constructed of a wooden mask that would almost be the size of your chest. It would look down on you, it would be impossible not to. Your eye-line would reach their waist, and with your arms outstretched you would maybe reach their petal constructed pectorals.

A creature like that would bring with it a smell. Anyone who has been in a greenhouse knows that a volume of plant matter that dense generates a rich perfume of life itself. Sweet and grassy and floral.

A creature like that would flutter and tremble with every movement, ripples from the sheer weight of it running down with every fabricated breath and subtle adjustment. Imagine each shifting change, how noticeable it would be. How much of your animal brain would be dedicated to those observations, making sure that you were not in danger.

Envision how piercing its gaze would be, focused and attentive on you from those massive eyes so high above you. How it would make your heart race if that huge wooden mask clicked and clattered as it adjusted into a thorny smile.

Consider how it would actually feel to be lifted off the ground by this figure. You wouldn’t become weightless under them. You would be just as strong as you currently are, just as beholden to your own centre of gravity, simply supported by their tremendous arms and careful vines. The strength necessary to make such a manoeuvre effortless would be immensely tangible. Fear inducing perhaps. Or maybe it would be like a profound surrender, to be so easily carried in a way you haven’t felt since you were a child.

Consider all of this. And look back up. Really try to place this creature in your room.

Now imagine that it loves you.

That is what biorhythms are.

That, is what an Affini is.

[foxgirlpirate]

WE GETTING FLORTED ON THE 3DS 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥💯💯

[transmascfloret]

A critique I've seen of HDG is "you'd have no control over your life" and idk, I feel like I have so little control over my life now.

the main difference is here it's due to capitalism, ableism, and transphobia and I have to largely take care of myself. Whereas in HDG, I would be fed, clothed, my disabilities accommodated for, my transition would be done in a week And I'd have a large hot plant person caring for me the entire time.

If I'd have no control over my life, at least HDG is safe and sexy

[hornyhypnosissub]

No, petal

*gives you your implant*

GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD

[princesstsukiko]

The Affini's tendency to forcefem eggs is starting to make sense to me. Lately I've really been wanting to pin down a "man" and put estrogen on my tongue and then shove it down her throat, forcing her to injest it as she loses her mind underneath my body. I want to tease her as her skin gets softer, forcefully shave her body hair, and play with her tender, swelling breast buds. I want to pick out her first skirt and first bra to wear while she blushes red in both humiliation and pure euphoria. And at the end of it all, I'll tell her how much of a Good girl she is~

[curated-hdg]

Sweet Poppy (M/f version) by sheepwave

Released: May 2024

30k words; completed

Notable tags: Gaslighting, Yandere

Amelia is an independent human, who is dating Poppy, one of the aliens that conquered humanity and is known for taking pets. fortunately, Poppy doesn't want a human as a pet, and Amelia is definitely immune to mind control anyway. Its normal for your girlfriend to give you a necklace that doesn't come off, right? And being played with like a docile, empty doll is just a kink thing... As is the training and conditioning... Right? A fully illustrated story.

Hey, speaking of stories I am fundamentally not normal about, Sweet Poppy is the story of Amelia, an independent terran who absolutely isn't cooked, and Poppy, a perfectly normal affini.

Ha.

Haha.

Hahahahaha.

Sweet Poppy is an absolutely lovely dark comedy, centering Amelia, a terran who is, to put it bluntly, a floret in all but name, spending time dating an affini named Poppy. She's so glad hypnosis doesn't work on her. And that she's never used xenodrugs on her. This is normal. This is all fun and normal independent behavior.

Poppy Versonia is terrifying. It's hard to talk about why without spoiling the story, but suffice it to say that there is something wrong with her (/pos). This is also the fic that introduced "cooked" to the HDG lexicon, and that ain't for nothing.

[gods-sleepiest-transfem]

Independent who gets addicted to their affini "friend"'s biorhythm

They're only together once a week, but every night spent without that feeling and that smell makes her so much needier, so much more desperate for the smell and touch and biorhythm of their affini.

Except one week, her affini doesn't come, something came up. Then another.

The next time her affini does come to the independent's hab, her new floret is burying herself in her vines, desperate to never have to be away from her again. And she doesn't have to be.

[thebenevolentmachine]

One of the cool things many HDG fans relate to, is how quickly it latched onto us and got stuck in our heads.

But later on, you start to notice how it's changed you in positive ways.

Keeping this vague on purpose, but even my lover noticed and appreciated some of those changes :3

[obliviasart]

PSA: Remember to give your florets regular oral inspections, it's for their health!

[littlemissspiraleyes]

When Lush said she was coming over my mouth started watering. There was definitely something off about this. I‘ve been buzzing with excitement whenever she comes over. It wasn’t like this at the start.

She was kinda annoyingly forward, to be honest. Plus she’s not really my type. I’ve always liked my hook-ups smaller than me and too shy to say much. But she’s so tall. She’s wide for an Affini. She’s very flirtatious. She goes on and on about wanting a pet and talking about how cute her friends’ pets are, which might be the most annoying part of all. Both because she shows me very sexual pics of those pets with their owners, and because thinking about florets makes me uncomfortable in some fundamental way. Those used to be people but now they’re property, and they don’t care? Weird.

But she’s coming over. I try to clean up my Hab to dispel this nervous energy, but my drones already did that when the Hab heard I was going to have a visitor. Instead I compile a glass of water. I should eat something. I have enough time. I hadn’t had lunch yet. But I know that I’ll eat plenty when she gets here. The thought makes my mouth water.

She arrives around the time my initial burst of excitement has faded. “Thank you for letting me come over, cutie.” she says in the low, seductive voice of hers. She hands me a berry as she steps inside. I excitedly take it and pop it in my mouth. I moan at the burst of flavor. She walks over to my Affini-sized couch and I follow without any thought but the taste and perfect texture on my tongue. I sit across from her in my Terran-sized armchair.

After I swallow the berry and have a moment to recover she says, “Your adorable noises remind me so much of Chrysanthemum’s pet. She recently sent me a video of zer at a florgy ze attended! Here, let me show you.” she pulls out her compact.

“Can we talk about something other than florets for once?” I ask.

“Why, do you have a problem with florets?” she asks.

I grimace. I don’t want to get a wellness check for feralist leanings. “No. They’re...cute. I would just like to learn more about you, instead.”

She beams with delight at that. “I’d love to talk about myself. But you know, you’d make a cute floret.” She hands me another berry. I happily munch on it, trying and failing not to make a comparable moan to a floret’s. She’s smiling down at me the entire time.

I deflect the comment like all of the other ones like it that she usually makes. The rest of the conversation goes pleasantly. I learn she’s a behavioral psychologist with a specialist in conditioning. She periodically gives me berries. I notice for the first time that she does this after praising me.

After an hour she says that she needs to go. This saddens me, which is another odd feeling to spring up. She notices.

“What’s wrong, beautiful?” she asks. She leans over as she says this. I can smell the berries on her. She must have a graft.

“Maybe tomorrow you can stay over for longer?” I ask, blushing.

“I’d like that.” she says, handing me another berry.

[magical-grrrl-mavis]

Human Domestication Guide / "Humans are deathworlders" crossover except instead of living on a deathworld making humans incredibly tough we are just the most anxiety riddled beings in the known universe.

[moon-floret]

if tumblr goes down I solemnly hope hdg tumblr actually reads a fic that isn't hdg abscission or divaricated in the absence of Posts gobbless

[isuggestdomestication]

hacking together whatever the Affini equivalent of gcode is to convince the atomic compiler to construct a singular, infinitely long, fully cooked spaghetti, because I wanna know if I can eat it faster than it can make it.

[registered-cryptid]

The affini replacing all our doctors with vets is really weird to me.

They couldn't have had that word before they found us, so that means they deliberately did that on purpose to make us feel more like animals.

Honestly that actually kinda makes sense.

Anyway, that being said. Goin to the vet to get puppy ears n tail!!!! So excited!! Bark!!!

[curated-hdg]

Home Sweet Home by PyxxieStyxx

Published: February 2025

6.8k words; oneshot

Notable tags: Ever Domesticate yourself with a plush? No? Time to find out how that works

Camila Rodriguez is a very independent Terran who managed to navigate the world of the Affini Compact, and acquire her first Hab! All she has left to do is compile and design the interior! That shouldn't be too difficult... Would it?

Today, in "how to be a seed": struggle to make basic decisions because the sheer number of options is completely overwhelming. Now, some might say this feels obviously unfair, a trap for anyone who has trouble deciding anything, intentionally made worse by the affini. To which I'd say... Duh? Obviously? They want pets. If you don't have the right vibes, if you're the kind of person who struggles with interior home renovation when given an infinite budget and no material constraints, you'd probably be better off with an affini taking care of you.

By the by, this is probably a good time to remind y'all that Pyxx is very very funny.

‹ MaeveIII › : Oh yes; it does that when a sophont appears to be having trouble deciding on some options. ‹ CamCam › : I am not having trouble. ‹ MaeveIII › : Flower, it appears you have been searching for ‘lamp’ for the better part of two hours. If you aren’t having trouble, then I must recognize and commend you for your thoroughness.

And then there's folks who get overwhelmed and immediately make incredibly poor choices. Like, wow. Our main character is uh. Wow. Well, one might argue these are in fact excellent choices, or that they in fact weren't real choices at all, but this is HDG, and we stan people losing their identity and personality over fae games they never understood they were playing. Especially when it's really, really hot.

Pyxx doesn't miss, y'all.