#Hopefully by then I forget about this completely

[ladykailitha]

Of Butterflies and Backstrokes Part 11

Hey guys! We're back!! It is feeling like this story is almost done, but every time I finish a chapter I go "This has two more chapters in it, I'm almost done!" and I've done that for the last three chapters. So I have given up trying to figure out when it's going to end. Hopefully the answer is sometime before the next Olympics.

In this we have a silly Eddie, Steve and Max are sneaky, and Max and Eddie have their first competition.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10

~

Steve continued to have good days and bad days, but always Eddie and Robin were there to help him work through the bad. And then he would spill it all out to Dr. Hughes.

Today he had been able to wade out to Max in the main pool to correct her foot work. The water had come up to his chest, just like it did in the kiddie pool.

“All right,” Steve said gently. “I’m going to touch your leg. If you feel uncomfortable in anyway, I’ll have Robin do it instead, okay?”

Max thought about it for a moment. “But just my leg right?”

“Just your ankle even,” he assured her. “Ready?”

Max waded over to the side of the pool and started kicking her feet to level out her body. Steve gently grabbed her ankle and repositioned her foot so it was more like an extension of her leg.

“Whoa!”

“That’s right,” he said, “now keep it like that.”

Robin and Eddie who had been working in the endless pool came back to the main pool just as Steve was pulling his shirt back on.

Eddie eyed the wet swim trunks and the happily kicking Max and a sly smile spread over his face. “Stevie... you wouldn’t have happened to have gotten into the pool with Max would you have?”

Steve batted his eyelashes innocently. “Who me?” He turned to Max. “Did you see me get into the pool?”

“Nope!”

Eddie knelt on the side of the pool and said, “I’ll buy you ice cream for the next month if you tell me if he got in the pool.”

Robin sneaked up behind him and with Max’s help pulled him into the water as gently as they could, as to not trigger Steve.

It must have worked because when they all came up for air, Steve was doubled over with laughter.

“Absolute menaces the lot of you,” he said once he caught his breath. “I got the competition schedule for next week. Max is in beginner and Eddie in intermediate. I tried to argue for higher, but they because you’ve been out for so long, they want you in there first to see if you have room to grow.”

Eddie wiped the water off of his face. “That’s fair. I don’t think I’m ready for higher yet anyway.”

Steve gave him a fond look. “And then that’s what we’ll do. If you don’t feel comfortable competing at above intermediate yet, then I won’t force you. I just worry they’ll accuse of you of deliberately choosing lower to spank fifteen and sixteen year olds.”

Eddie blinked at him for a moment.

“Oh.”

He went to go shove his hair in front of his face, but it was all tucked away in his cap, so he started to sink into the water.

Steve, Robin, and Max all watched as he held his breath under water.

“So how long do you think he can hold his breath?” Max asked after about a minute. “Because I think cell death happens after three minutes.”

“Eh...” Robin said waving her hand back and forth, “about four to five, actually.”

Just then Eddie burst through the water, gasping for air. He wiped the water away and looked around. “So is anyone going to be nice and completely forget that happened?”

All three of them shared glances with each other and then said together, “No.”

Eddie buried his head in his hands. He slunk off to his lane with a sigh. “Woe! Woe is me! For I have been forsaken by my own team. Woe!”

Steve and Max shared a glance.

“Is he always this dramatic?” Max asked, eyeing Eddie splashing about and moaning about his fate or some shit.

Robin scoffed as she pulled herself out of the pool and rotated to sit on its edge. “This is tame for him, if I’m being honest.”

Eddie stopped his sputtering and turned to her quickly. “I? I am dramatic?” Then he made a sweeping bow, nearly face planting into the water. “Why thank you!”

Everyone giggled but Max and Eddie got back into their lanes and started practicing again. Robin got up and went to go stand by Steve.

“I’m glad you were able to help Max on your own,” she murmured. “But just remember, if you can’t, call and I’ll coming running, okay?”

“Okay.”

~

It was their first swim meet and Robin wasn’t sure who was more nervous, Max and Eddie or Steve.

She was sure that that pen lid would be a mangled, tangled up mess by the time this was over with.

She looked around the room, spotting a few friends, the Hell Squad from their own facility, and one very unfriendly face indeed.

Billy Hargrove.

Billy Hargrove was a swimmer from California and he thought living on the coast instantly made you a better swimmer. He even had that bit of surfer boy charm. You’d expect this blond haired, blued eyed, tan Adonis to start singing Beach Boys or some shit, but no.

Billy Hargrove was an ass. And he hated all the comparisons between him and Steve at the last Olympics. Dude went on to barely win bronze in two of five events and not medal in any of the others.

Today he was wearing a red and gold coach’s jacket with HARGROVE emblazoned on the back with two blonds standing next him as he talked them in low voices. One was a girl with strawberry blonde hair, green eyes, and bright smile. The other was a guy that looked about the same age as the girl. He looked like he had walked out the pages of Good Christians R Us. Hair neatly cut, blue eyes, chiseled jaw and washboard abs.

Robin hated them both on sight.

She was about to steer Steve away from all that when Billy looked up immediately clocked Steve, who promptly stiffened.

Max and Eddie who were talking to him noticed the sudden change in Steve’s demeanor. And unlike the locker room with Andy, Eddie could tell that this was a different breed of shark coming their way.

“Stevie...” Billy greeted. “When I saw the name Harrington I was wondering if that was you and then here you are. Such a pleasant surprise.”

Robin and Steve shared a bitchy glance. “Pleasant isn’t the word I would use,” Steve scoffed.

“You actually getting in the water, Harrington, or are you going to bitch out again?” Billy went on as if Steve hadn’t said a word.

Steve seethed. Billy had been present the first time he tried to get into the pool after his accident and started screaming.

“Don’t worry, darlin’,” Eddie said with a grin, “Stevie here doesn’t need to get in the water to beat you. He has me.”

Billy looked him up and down and he looked impressed for all of two seconds before he scoffed. “I didn’t think they allowed boys with such pretty curls,” he said tugging on one of the strands. Eddie swatted his hand away. “Maybe you should be on the girls’ team.”

“Last time I checked,” Eddie huffed, “I have the balls for the men’s team. Can’t say the same for the asshole who came up and harassed a guy that had his Olympic dreams washed away because of faulty equipment that left him traumatized and hurt for life, but still loves to swim so much that he would rather coach then to walk away forever.”

Billy’s face twisted in rage and he opened his mouth to reply when the whistle sounded. He jabbed a finger in Eddie’s face. “We’re not done.”

He walked off and suddenly all the tension built up in Steve escaped like a deflated balloon.

“That guy is a dick,” Max hissed. “My mom used to date a guy just like him out in Cali. Wouldn’t surprise me if they were related.”

That made Steve laugh. “I’ll beat him where I’ve always beaten him, in the water. Now come on, it’s time for you two to hit the showers. The beginners are about to start. You’re in the third heat, Max, first podium.”

She nodded and her and Eddie took off their team shirts and hit the showers. Steve looked over at Billy and smirked. Billy was watching every inch of Eddie’s body as he padded over to the showers that were next to the pool.

Robin handed him his bobby pins and he deftly put his hair under the cap, making it as sleek as any of the other male contestants.

The first set of eight girls lined up and then they were off with the shot of the starting gun. Steve watched, looking out for the girls that would be Max’s competition. So far none of the girls showed real promise and that included the girl who won.

The next heat was the same. None of the other girls had the same spark Max did. He looked up to the stands where the families were supposed to there to cheer them on. Robin’s parents were there. Eddie’s uncle, too. Of course Steve’s parents wouldn’t be there. He hadn’t talked them in so long.

He didn’t see the woman that would come to pick up Max and it made Steve squirm a bit. Then just before Max’s heat, he saw her come rushing in. Her hair was wild as if she had been running and she looked out of breath. She leaned over to whisper something to Wayne. Wayne shook his head and pointed to where Max was getting ready to get up on her podium.

Steve went over to her and pointed up at the stands.

Max’s eyes lit up and she waved at her mom. Her mom waved back. Max got up on her podium and put her goggles in place over her eyes. Steve stepped back and gave the judge with the gun a nod, showing that he had moved back far enough. Then the gun went off.

Max easily kept pace with the other girls and managed to squeak out winning by an arms length, touching her pad first.

She pulled off her goggles and looked at her time. She had clearly won. She started jumping and shrieking in the water. She pulled herself out and ran up to give Steve the biggest hug.

“I told you, you could do it,” Steve murmured into her cap.

“Yeah, yeah,” she huffed. “Nerd.”

They went through the next few heats and Max came in third overall in the girls division. Which considering it was her first meet, was very impressive.

Then it was time for the intermediate and as they watched the girls, Eddie began bouncing up and down to warm up his muscles.

“You ready to blow these people out of the water?” Steve asked with a grin. “I gave the organizers one last chance to put you in masters, but they wouldn’t do it.”

Eddie chuckled. “I don’t have the confidence you do in me, but hell yeah, I’m ready.”

Steve slapped him on the shoulder and watched as Eddie got up to the podium. He pulled the goggles over his eyes and turned away from the water.

This is what he loved most of all about the backstroke. Not facing the water or seeing his competitors out of the corners of his eyes. It was just him and waiting for the sound of the gun.

BANG!

And then he was arching backwards into the water, as smooth as silk. His arms and body worked with the water, slicing through like a hot knife through butter. He could hear the splashing of the other competitors but they all seemed so distant to himself. Not that they were that far away. Only that he felt on whole other realm then they were.

He touched the pad and peeled off his googles to look up at the clock.

He was in first place.

He was in first place.

He was in first place.

He looked up at the stands to see Mrs. Mayfield and Uncle Wayne on their feet and cheering for him. He raised his fist and they waved back excitedly.

It came as no surprise that he won best overall.

He was standing next to Steve celebrating with his team, when the judges came up to them.

“We would like to talk to you about moving up to the masters,” the first judge said with a grimace.

Eddie and Steve shared a knowing grin.

“I think that could be arranged,” Steve said, smug. The ‘I told you so’ lingering in the humid air of the pool.

~

Tag List: CLOSED

1- @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog @gloomysoup

2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system

3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

4- @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji @eriquin

5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon

6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman

7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth

8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss

9- @chameleonhair @sadisticaltarts @dreamercec @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @mac-attack19

10- @aol19 @tartarusknight @morallyundefined

[cherubimcore]

pairing: alastor x reader

author's notes: sorry for the long wait 😭 college hates me and i started a new internship and i don't even have time to think about writing... but i finished another chapter, i don't know if it's good but i hope you like it, hopefully the next one is longer but i can't make any promises ;)

part 1

“what’s wrong?” charlie asked with a worried tone.

“nothing you have to concern your little head about it” alastor forced a smile, he knew none of them would believe him but he needed a couple hours alone to think about the letter “now… if there’s nothing more to be said, i will be going”

and before any of them could ask more questions alastor blended into the shadows and transported himself to his room in the hotel.

letting his smile drop a little he sat on his bed and stared at the letter in his hands.

why were they doing this to him?

sure, he’s not exactly the best person out there but he at least tried to be somewhat civil, between helping charlie with this excuse of a hotel and trying to not infringe on the terms of the deal he made long ago.

but this… this put everything he spent the last decades building in jeopardy.

if alastor could he would simply tear this letter apart and burn it, never thinking about those words again.

the demon stepped in front of his fireplace with the letter in hands ready to ignore and completely forget about it, but the tight grip on his hands didn’t let the letter fall in the flames.

he couldn’t.

after staring at the letter for what felt like hours, alastor finally set it aside. he could see the angels’ game as clear as day: they were setting him up to fail, counting on his nature to make it impossible for anyone, much less a human, to see him as anything more than a monster

and with that he was setting the hotel to fail spectacularly and that certainly wasn’t his deal with lilith all those years before.

that’s why she sent him the letter.

threatening everything he had accomplished with her help, either alastor likes to admit it or not.

but alastor was nothing if not stubborn, he wouldn’t let this stupid joke from heaven and lilith destroy everything for him, and, as much as he hates to admit, for charlie as well, and he wasn’t about to play the angels’ little game without a twist of his own.

after alastor’s initial attempts to charm you—mostly involving unsettling gifts, eerie glances, and his “radio smile” lingering far too long—he began to realize that his usual tactics weren't working. he’d appear in mirrors, whisper eerie compliments from dark corners, and once even serenaded you with a distorted, old-timey song that left you rattled. and yet, instead of getting closer, you were pulling away, more suspicious than ever.

seeing his frustration, the crew decided to intervene.

“look, al,” angel dust said one afternoon as he watched alastor pace around the lobby. “you can’t just be creepy and expect a girl to swoon. romance isn’t about lurking around like some horror movie villain.”

alastor frowned, his smile flickering. “romance isn’t exactly my expertise,” he admitted, crossing his arms. “but I was certain that she’d appreciate a little…mystique.”

“maybe tone down the ‘i’m watching you from the shadows’ vibe,” charlie suggested gently. “why don’t you just…be there for her? show up, help her out, maybe smile a little less, um…serial-killer-y?”

husk snorted, shaking his head. “yeah, or just act like a normal person for once. no haunting, no creeping.”

alastor grimaced, but, reluctantly, he took their advice. the next time he appeared, it was during the day, while you were organizing books on the shelf. he simply knocked on the door—a sharp, polite rap that startled you. when you turned, he was standing there with an unreadable expression, his hands behind his back.

“good afternoon,” he said, his voice smooth, though still holding that eerie undertone. “i thought perhaps I could assist you…if you’d allow.”

you looked at him with a puzzled expression, was he joking? after almost scaring you to death all those days and making you actually consider moving out of the very nice house you didn’t actually pay rent to now being polite as if he’s a sort of roomate of yours wanting to make peace after an argument?

you scoffed but still allowed him to help, at least he could make himself useful after everything.

“so…” you said after a while, still side-eyeing him, expecting your ghostly intruder to do something suspicious “what are you exactly?”

alastor stopped on his tracks, still with a book on his hands halfway through to be put on the shelf.

“well, me dear” you noticed the static on voice had toned down significantly after your first encounters “i am a demon”

“a demon, huh” you squinted, why the hell didn’t your grandmother tell you she had a freaking demon living in her house? “do you have a name, demon?”

alastor’s smile faltered a little, back in hell he would never let anyone talk to him like this, but here he was swallowing the harsh words he wanted to say at the cost of his life... or even better not-life.

“no name?” you insisted, making him wake up from his daydream.

“the name’s alastor” the deer-man turned towards you, the pile of books on his hand gone and the room feeling less like a mess “and what is your name?”

“you are haunting me and don't even know my name?” you crossed your arms on your chest, laughing at the idea.

alastor opened his mouth to send a snarky remark in your direction but you were faster.

“my name is (y/n)... (y/n) (y/l/n)”

after you introduced yourself, alastor’s expression flickered briefly, he had heard your name before he was sure he had but why couldn’t he place it from where? it’s not usual for alastor to forget things like this, he made a mental note to talk to charlie about it, maybe she would know.

“well, (y/n), i must say,” alastor began “it’s a pleasure to finally make your acquaintance properly.” he extended a hand in an oddly formal gesture, as if you were meeting at a tea party rather than dealing with an uninvited demon in your grandmother’s home.

despite yourself, you almost felt a pang of amusement at his attempt at chivalry, and with a smirk, you took his hand. his touch was cool, yet strangely grounding. but the moment you released his hand, that unnerving cheshire grin of his was back.

“now that we’re formally introduced,” he said, leaning in with an amused gleam in his eye, “perhaps you’ll stop looking at me like a poltergeist?”

“maybe if you stop acting like one,” you countered, rolling your eyes but finding yourself oddly charmed by his persistence.

taglist: @vxllys

[callmebrycelee]

9-1-1 REACTION

These are my confessions, just when I thought that I was starting to fall in love, my boyfriend unceremoniously decided to dump me.

After a week off and a presidential election that felt like a season of American Horror Story, we finally got a new episode of the gay firefighter show. Unfortunately I was spoiled by the episode's ending courtesy of Tumblr but nothing could've ever prepared me for how infuriating things would get. But, I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's start at the beginning. This reaction is for the season 8, sixth episode "Confessions" which originally aired November 7th, 2024. The episode was written by Andrew Meyers and directed by Life Goes On and Pretty Little Liars actor, Chad Lowe! Spoilers ahead!

Best plot?

This week's episode focuses on a handful of our main characters. We finally get some time with Eddie and we get a bonkers storyline involving Buck and Tommy. However, it is Maddie and Chimney's plot that is my favorite. A few episodes ago, Hen and Karen regained custody of Mara which means Jee-Yun is back to being an only child. Maddie laments that Jee-Yun is having trouble adjusting to a life where Mara isn't her big sister anymore even though the two see quite a bit of each other. She suggests having a second child but Chimney has some trepidation about having another kid.  During an emergency involving a little kid getting stuck in a drain pipe a la "Eddie Begins", Chimney consoles his older brother who blames himself for his little brother wandering off and winding up in a dangerous situation. The little boy (played by Tiberius Byrd) volunteers himself to be lowered down in the pipe so he can pull his absolutely adorable baby brother out of the drain. Afterwards, Chimney warms to the idea of having a little brother or sister for Jee-Yun.

In their final scene, Chimney and Maddie have a raw and open conversation regarding their concerns about having another child. Chimney tearfully tells Maddie that if she is ever feeling sad or overwhelmed, she needs to come to him. She doesn't get to leave or try to figure it out on her own. He asks for total and complete transparency. Wow! I think we sometimes forget that while Maddie is a trauma magnet, Chimney has been right there since the beginning experiencing those tragedies with her. He went through the Doug situation with her. He spent six months raising Jee-Yun on his own while looking for Maddie. For him, having another child could send Maddie back down that same dark path again.

Now Maddie has some conditions of her own. She tells Chimney that they can't go into her pregnancy acting like she's broken. Oh, and yes you read that correctly. Maddie is pregnant! Yay!!! This is the best thing to come out of the episode and it makes me excited for this couple. Hopefully this time around, things will be much better for them.

Best emergency sequence?

We got three emergency sequences this episode but the best by far is the one involving veteran actor Jonathan Silverman. The Weekend at Bernie's and more recently Goosebumps actor plays a man named Walter Schaffer who is in the middle of a nasty divorce. His soon-to-be ex-wife, Liza Schaffer (played by Silverman's real-life wife Jennifer Finnigan) points out that Walter sneezes when he's lying and Walter has been sneezing a LOT! As things reach a boiling point between the two, Walter lets out one last sneeze which causes his stomach to split open and his guts to fall out. I really wish I could've taken a picture of my mom when this happened, She hasn't been this horrified by a 9-1-1 show since Owen Strand decided to perform CPR on a man frozen solid by his cryotherapy chamber. 

This whole scene is mostly played for laughs even though Walter has been eviscerated. After last episode's gut-wrenching accident involving Denny Wilson, it was nice to have a low stakes emergency. Also, it was good to see Jonathan Silverman. I love when they bring veteran actors in to have them perform these small roles. It's one of the reasons I like Ryan Murphy shows so much. He always pays homage to the legends. Oh, and Walter is okay. Even though he spilled his guts, he's still a creep! You made the right decision, Liza!

Episode MVP?

This was a tough one. None of our main characters did anything particularly outstanding this week. This episode is giving filler but I still enjoyed it. However, since I do need to pick someone to be this week's MVP, I'm going to choose everyone's favorite dispatcher - Josh Russo. Josh mostly serves as comic relief in this series but I thought what he had to say to Buck was particularly noteworthy. As someone who is part of the pre-Glee world. I relate so hard to what people like Josh and Tommy have gone through as gay men. I graduated in the early-2000s and even though life was much improved for LGBTQ+ people than let's say the 70s, 80s, and 90s, I still didn't feel comfortable coming out until my late-20's. Buck's coming out was so simple and much of that is due in part to the queer people that came before him. I'm sure someone like Josh had a difficult time prior to coming out and Tommy went as far as getting into a serious relationship with a woman before he finally made the decision to come out. Had the end of this episode gone a lot differently, I think Josh's monologue would be even better. I also love that he called Buck in instead of calling him out. I wish we got more scenes with Josh and Buck because as of right now they are the only two queer male characters on the show. 

 BuckTommy Corner

I've been dreading writing this part of the reaction mostly because it might be the last BuckTommy Corner we ever get. A lot of fellow shippers online seem to think that we may see Buck and Tommy reunite but the ending of this episode has me convinced that we aren't getting the BuckTommy endgame many of you have been asking for since the two first touched lips. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself again.

After last episode's stellar development of Buck and Tommy's relationship, this episode's writer decided to burn it all down. Our first scene between Buck and Tommy finds them back where it all began. It's their six-month anniversary and Tommy has gotten Buck basketball tickets. Things seem to be going swimmingly between the two of them until some hot blonde comes over and asks Buck to take a picture of her and her friends. Buck seems very awkward by the situation but Tommy assures him it's okay for him to find other women attractive. Whew! Crisis averted! I was so sure this was going to be the conflict of the episode.

Then we get Tommy admitting to Buck that he is a Kinsey scale six which means he's g-g-gay ... even though once upon a time he was engaged to a 9-1-1 dispatcher with the most amazing hair. Yes, folks, Tommy Kinard was engaged to Abby Clark. Tommy mentions that after he ended things, Abby went on to date a himbo. Buck is completely shooketh by this revelation and goes to his sister for advice. This is where we get the fantastic monologue from Josh. Buck decides to come clean to Tommy and figures that this changes nothing about their relationship.

Tommy apologizes for calling Buck a himbo and the latter asks Tommy to move in with him. Then everything goes to absolute shit. Tommy spouts some bullshit about being Buck's first (male) relationship but he will not be his last. Tommy says he doesn't want to get his heart broken again and then throws up the deuces to a very confused Buck. I'm sorry, y'all! What in the absolute hell just happened! I don't know who that man was. I know he looked like Lou Ferrigno Jr. playing Tommy Kinard but it's like some alien took over Tommy's body during this scene. This is not the same man we have gotten to know over the few seasons. Yes, Tommy did have some reservations about getting into a relationship with Buck so soon after his coming out but they squashed all of that way back in 7x05. Since then, these two have been building something amazing only to have it blown up so unceremoniously at the end of this episode.

Now, as I mentioned prior, the ending to this episode was spoiled. After learning about the breakup, I immediately went to the BuckTommy Reddit and learned that others were as similarly confused as I was. To make matters worse, it appears that Lou Ferrigno Jr, is as equally flummoxed by the decision to end things as the viewers, which is not a good look for the show. Why give us all that development in "Masks" only for Tommy to exit stage left. Thankfully, Lou announced that he will be returning to S.W.A.T. so I'm comforted that I will get to see him again in a skin-tight black T-shirt. One thing I will say about Lou is the man stays working. Check out his IMDb. He may not be the series lead but he stays working and he will continue to work because he seems to be an extremely competent and professional actor. 

The end of this episode left a bad taste in my mouth and I'm not just saying that because of the BuckTommy breakup. I've somewhat suspected that things have not been good with this show for a very long time but as long as I got scenes with Buck and Tommy, I was willing to keep going. This show is in its eighth season and we keep putting these characters through the same paces. Eddie's still trying to figure out how to be a good dad to Christopher seven seasons later. Maybe the show is getting a bit stale? I dunno. This episode just felt less fun for some reason. Perhaps I need to watch it again.

With that said, I will continue to watch 9-1-1 because I do love the characters on this show and the actors that play them. Oh, and by the way, please do not give Lou or Oliver any hate for simply playing what was written for them. Also, a lot of you are upset with Oliver and calling him biphobic. Now, do I think he said some problematic things in the last interview he did? Yes. Do I think he needs to be nailed to the cross for it? Absolutely not! I think we as viewers and members of the LGBTQ+ community need to take a page out of the Book of Josh and start calling people in instead of calling people out. We are very reactionary people and I totally get it. Being part of a marginalized group (or two, or three) especially here in America is rough and we find ways to protect ourselves to prevent harm from being inflicted on us. With that said, I believe it is quite possible to take an ally to task without potentially alienating them. As an elder, millennial gay, I think that's something we can all get better at! Until next time ...

[iridescentmirrorsgenshin]

i love reading your fic thoughts!!

are there any fics you'd recommend or read where you like the way they are characterized? i'm a writer and hope i accurately represent them but i'm never sure, but it's fun to see you doing similar things (going over voice lines and scenes to get their voice down and stuff)

and i think inspiration can help!

hiya! ahh thank you so much, i'm glad you found them interesting! and i perfectly understand your struggle :( it's a ritual at this point to watch their interactions so i can get a feel of them for ongoing fics, i'm considering rewatching a parade of providence at some point as a treat <3

and !! i agree! the fanfiction community is a circle of never ending ideas, so it's amazing how we all inspire each other! for characterisation here are some that stand out to me in my mind <3

Patron of the Arts - nevergreengale, volansvultar - ongoing and (hopefully not) discontinued, but a really interesting take in alhaitham asking kaveh to be his architect for him to move in! kaveh's inner monologue is just him, i especially love his musings about altruism, and the rift between him and alhaitham. a nice mystery going on with whatever is occupying alhaitham as well!

Strawberry High - etherealnara - this IS the drunk alhaitham fic for me, i love seeing him interact with inazuma characters, as well as being competitive. the dynamic between alhaitham and kaveh here is sighworthy, you can really feel the strain towards the end!

The City of Gold and Dust - Amayax - ongoing. pov switch with each chapter, mishaps with time and a really intriguing mystery! both voices truly shine here, i particularly love the prose of alhaitham dealing with grief, and how you can feel how much kaveh means to him, whereas kaveh can feel the burden of missing something obvious, but not knowing what. the contrast is lovely!

(self-recommendation) Change is Imp(ur)rative - completed. mentioning this because this is my fav piece of work i've done for them so far! really hoping the characterisation works, this is a slowbuild into the progression of their relationship, i'm a sucker for them actually talking and what them airing their grievances could look like <3

Old Habits, New Beginnings - thvndaga - completed. amnesiac alhaitham. this is such a lovely lovely fic with alhaitham entirely forgetting himself, but knowing that he's in love with kaveh, but kaveh refusing to believe it? very addictive to read and an incredible journey!

in the market for forgiveness - chaoticloutral - this is so cute, the rising tension over the mundane, the major misunderstanding based around (1) interaction. kaveh's perspective is perfectly rationalised, and alhaitham dogging after him to explain himself! also the atmosphere here! lovely!

best of r/relationship_advice - farozaan - completed. reddit style fic, this is HILARIOUS! kaveh coming to terms with his feelings about alhaitham (but really knowing all along) and alhaitham's quiet patinece is just so ahhh it's them <3

When Sun and Moon Align - Undercover_Owl - ongoing. a time travel fic with kaveh being flung back into his days as a student, attempting to fix his vision with his inquisitive best friend/junior alhaitham, all the while alhaitham is struggling to adjust to kaveh's disappearance in present day. LOVELY! the mystery and prose are enticing, and kaveh's shifting understanding of current alhaitham is so scrummy!

To Dream in Shades of Green - Intensely_Reading - completed. this is such an addictive fic, with kaveh being involved in an experiment (courtesy of yae miko) where his dreams become light novels, only for his dream to take the form of an otome game! so fun and the development between dream alhaitham and kaveh, with him comparing this relationship to real alhaitham is so well done! and real alhaitham going about to locate the cause of kaveh's anxiety is so real <3

six ways to friday - mousiekosmos - completed. this fic is INSANE. the prose is so lovely and alhaitham's perspective makes me want to eat my hand. so rational and logical and yet completely overthinking when it comes to matters concerning kaveh. the hesitance and misunderstanding in their initial relationship is so gutwrenching, and kaveh being the one to chase it !!! i thoroughly recommend

bad days, good days - emigmatic - a wonderful oneshot, kaveh's voice really shines through here, the uncertainties and his anxieties and tiptoeing around alhaitham, while alhaitham is so patient, just MWAH.

flower of my flower - bringingglory - completed. hanahaki alhaitham time. the mounting struggle of alhaitham's rationale in not telling kaveh and seeing kaveh worry from the side culminates perfectly! a very addictive read!

Briars and Roses 'Round Your Heart - sonotfine - completed. hanahaki kaveh time. one of my fav hanahaki aus! i love love the tension building from alhaitham's side as kaveh tries to downplay the progression of his sickness. the confrontation scene lives in my head, the suspense culminates perfectly!

[allisonreader]

I don't know how to express what I want to at the moment...

At least not how to start off. How I truly want is to say something like "shoot me now" or "kill me now". Neither of which is what I really mean. Though curling up in a dark hole and crying sounds good about now.

I'm just being overly sensitive and distressed about having received two comments on old stories that I recently cross posted to AO3 that essentially accuse me of using ChatGPT or whatever it is to write them. Since I've seen them, I've been dwelling on them. Which feels so ridiculous, but I am. I don't know if I should have, but I responded to both explaining that the one thing was written like 10 years ago and the other probably about 20 when I was a literal child.

I still might go in a delete the comments on them.

Times like these are when I wonder if I have the right mentality to ever try to get anything professionally published one day.

It definitely makes me not want to post the couple of stories I was uncertain about posting already.

And it's not like the comments are completely unwarranted. The stories are definitely not well written, because they're OLD and I didn't want to rewrite them.

And now I'm kind of regretting posting them at all.

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: August 1

“Take Me Out" by Franz Ferdinand

[summertimemusician]

Honestly I don't know if I'm remembering it wrong due to sleep deprivation, but out of everything in TOTK one of my favorite little details is that Zelda's eyes in her Divine Noodle (affectionate) form when Demon King's flames hit or graze her tremble a little, more so around the pupils than the iris

The implications are absolutely delicious when you think about it, either it's an expression of deep seated, primal fear which she would probably feel as a dragon even if her main instinct is to help Link, it makes sense she'd feel distressed when faced with a bigger predator if we assume the dragons actually work like wild animals (I mean have we looked at Demon King's full size and length? He absolutely overshadows her and he's clearly going in for the kill, what with that initial bite, he's clearly not only gunning for Link and for Hyrule but also for her specifically), because Zelda by nature is not a warrior, she will fight for her people and to defend her people but she's not one to start the conflict, she's not one to HUNT, so when faced with something actively doing so it makes sense she'd be a little afraid, just because you are made to fight the divine threat from birth doesn't mean you can't fear death in the process('Courage is not the absence of fear but the will to rise against it even when you're afraid' and all that), immortality or not and trust me I'm getting to that part-

And arguably the more interesting implication: that dragons can feel pain/get hurt from other beings in a similar status, which also puts their immortality into question. Because that little twitch can also be because the flames actually hurt her.

One thing I always found interesting in TOTK is the dragon skeletons deep down in the Depths, they're parallel with the Leviathan skeletons, sure, but the fact that the dragons that we know can come and go from the depths and that there are actual skeletons there makes me look at them side by side and think "Oh those are dragons" rather than Leviathans, which begs the question: what could have killed them if dragons are immortal and can live for such long periods of time? What could have killed them when none of our weapons (including the Master Sword mind you) can't hurt Naydra, Dinraal, Farosh and Zelda in a way that matters?

I think the best answer in this case is given to us by Zelda's reaction (assuming I'm not wrong and didn't just imagine it due to sleep deprivation) to the Demon King's flames.

Maybe, just maybe, what caused them to die was likely another dragon. Which means that dragons can actually die, just not through age or natural means, but have to actively be killed through the right means/being for it to stick. Which also tracks with a lot of divine lore in LOZ in general, Demise/Ganondorf only being able to be brought low by the Master Sword wielded by someone who posseses the Hero's Spirit (or that has become worthy of it is we see in Wind Waker) because it's quite literally a divine blade, Hylia actively giving up her immortal form to become a mortal but still slumbering/existing in a separate realm outside of time can also be considered a form of divine death, not to mention Bellum being in the process of killing the Ocean King in Phantom Hourglass. Divine beings have always had an element of mortality to them in LOZ, and it's not too much of a stretch to think that pattern might hold true in TOTK.

(Personally I think maybe the dragons we know might have killed the others in a territory/route dispute, if we go with the fact that a person loses themselves when they consume a secret stone and is guided by their base instincts/whatever goal they had before becoming a dragon, I don't think territory disputes would be all that far fetched, or some other goal which would motivate possible aggression.)

Although there's also the other possibility to consider: we get the armor set of the wild on the heads of those skeletons in TOTK, and we know for a FACT there was a hero before BOTW/TOTK Link, not only through the Ancient Hero's Aspect (which I have so many thoughts/headcanons about) but also through the tapestry in BOTW no matter what the heck happened to the lore in between games, you can still work with the information that there was a hero before BOTW/TOTK Link, and possibly one even before that one if we assume the armor set in the depths isn't from the Original Calamity Hero.

What I'm pitching here basically is, Original Calamity Link/another possible Link was likely a dragon slayer (not uncommon among Links, but how many Links killed an actual possibly divine dragon?), and possibly the one to kill the dragons in the depths and that maybe, just maybe we should have a game one day or a manga which either clarifies or debunks that- wait I know it sounds insane but listen stop walking away-

(Also if it's indeed a sign that Zelda feels pain it honestly ramps up Wild's/TOTK Link's motivation to kill Ganondorf WAY up because I too would want to eviscerate anyone who hurt Zelda even if she can't outwardly show it.

Also also- divine flame scars on Zelda where the gloom fueled fire grazed/hit her in her dragon form, you wouldn't be able to see it normally, but once she turns back into hylian they're there as another showing of how her time as a dragon will always stick and haunt her.)

[motherforthefamicom]

finally got the new desk set up in my room and cleaned out my dresser nd closet (had barely touched anything in there for Literal Years cuz of how much of a mess they were). feels surreal

[thechildisgone]

if anyone called me a milf bc i'm 30+ now i'd literally kill them

[cringefictionallizard]

YOU!! Yooouuuuu... "You are the bane of my existence." (affectionately)

This fictional lizard is single handedly responsible taking over my undying obsession over Star vs Foe

[wlw-webcomic-bracket]

Entirely off topic but

YOUR GIRL JUST GOT A VYVANSE PRESCRIPTION!

Please clap it has taken me six years

[blessphemy]

hoW COULD YOU DO THAT 😡😡😡😡😡😖😖😖😖😡😡😡😡😡😖😡 WHY???? WHY 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

🫡

it'll be okay. maybe.

[inkykeiji]

abt the media literacy topic, people who dont have their first language as english didnt know abt the word + the fact that the way that some subtitles mistakingly made it seem like a name of some sort. treating it like common knowledge and being condescending abt it is kinda ehhhh

this is a fair point and you’re right! that possibility crossed my mind as well, just like people genuinely not knowing what the word altruist meant or that it exists as a term at all. i didn’t know about the subtitles issue, so thanks for bringing that up! i do still believe the lack of media literacy in general, across everything (not just hazbin hotel or specific instances but as a whole, in north america in particular), is a concerning issue, but that obviously doesn’t apply to people genuinely mistaking an english word due to english not being their first language or the subtitles being misleading. i apologize for not making that clear in my response to that anon.

and when i say concerning, i want you to know that i mean it in a genuine, sincere way. being able to analyze and interpret media and art that is intended for adults (which often involves nuance and subtext) is a really important skill and something that i personally believe makes consuming and engaging with said piece of media fun and fulfilling. maybe not everyone feels the same way, and that’s totally alright; we can agree to disagree, absolutely. but these are skills i believe everyone should be taught, allowed to sharpen, and have access to, especially if you’re going to be interacting with adult media/art (this goes way beyond hh, i’m specifically thinking of literature and banned books here). i also know that there is a legitimate concern regarding the declining quality of education, especially for high school students, in north america (i’m in canada, but i know it’s even worse in the states, given the pockets of poverty etc). and that really worries and upsets me, because it’s completely unfair, and it’s fucking scary, how little people seem to give a shit about the education of the next generation.

i’m extremely passionate about this subject, and if i had the resources and qualifications, i’d absolutely set up a free media literacy course (or courses!) for anyone interested in taking it. who knows, maybe one day i will be able to do something like that—that would be really cool.

[tvrningon]

somebody remind me to talk about the way some of these phrases make cyrillo feral pls and thanks <3

[klqrambles]

Man,, when I get a therapist we're gonna have So Much to talk about 😩👍

[harmonybarmy]

finally got to watch scream 5 since 6 is now up for streaming worst experience of my life.