#He knows Kenny loves him insecurity does not exist in their relationship

[deleahtarte]

Q&A 2: What is something that your partner does that makes things ‘challenging’? [Part 2]

Butters: Kenny likes to hide his history with girls. Sometimes we'll get approached by a lady he used to be with, and he gets nervous because he thinks I'll get upset with him. He tells me constantly he ain't like that no more, that he changed, that he regrets everyone he's been with before me, but I don't really mind. I already knew who he was before me. I don't really get jealous either, because he proves me to me everyday he's all about little ol' me now. But I don't think Kenny sees that, so he tries to never talk about anyone he was with before me. (Correction: Kenny is afraid that Butters will be upset AND not want him anymore because he is 'used up.' He only thinks this of himself)

Kyle: Stan doesn't know how to ask for help. And on the rare occasions that he actually does, it's usually after everything goes to shit. I think it's because he wants me to see 'the best' version of himself, so he gets really embarrassed when I see something I'm not supposed to. I usually have to pry it out of him or investigate myself.

[redrobin-detective]

Ben 10 lore that exists in my heart regardless of canon

- Ben’s personality in his mid-late teens is a mix of his Alien Force and Omniverse self. On the surface, he’s very cheerful and kind even if he is a bit of arrogant showoff. He makes jokes and plays around and acts as if he isn’t bothered by the things in his life. Those who know him best understand a good portion of his outward confidence and cockiness is just a facade to cover up his insecurities and to project the ideal, effortless hero. While sometimes seen as immature, most beings know Ben 10 means business as he takes his unofficial job and people’s safety very seriously. He’s clever, adaptable, charismatic and empathetic which makes him a formidable opponent and a loyal friend. Doesn’t open up easily but if you get to him, he become so dearly attached. 

- Drinks smoothies so much for several reasons. Comfort food go brrr, reminds him of the good easy times with him Gwen and Kev. It’s also a light but generally nutritous food to give him energy for heroing. Anything too heavy and he’ll be puking (both from physical and emotional stress). Though he jokes about his mom’s health foods, his are a crazy concoction of add in proteins and vitamins/minerals bc he knows he’ll out and out collapse without it. (Still has on occasion bc boy still doesn’t eat right/enough)

- While Fame is exciting for him at first he soon begins to detest it. Not the fans, no, he can’t bring himself to hate the people who look up to him. But he hates the constant attention, that he can’t walk outside without being mobbed. the only place he feels safe is his hometown where most people are so used to him and his weirdness that they don’t react much anymore. Takes to wearing a cape and face shield when going out anywhere so he can actually get things done without being recognized and mobbed.

- Part of the reason Bellwood isn’t concerned with Ben is partially because ben’s been weird and alien for as long as they can remember but also many don’t realize how famous/powerful he is. Yeah that’s just Ben Tennyson over there, sometimes he turns into funny creatures- wait what do you MEAN he’s the savior of the universe?? He cried over a spilled smoothie the other day.

- Does mostly online schooling by the time he’s 15. At first he tries to do half day things to maintain something of a normal life but it quickly becomes overwhelming and dangerous him/the school. Finishes his GED early but the Plumbers and Azmuth make him take additional college level and alien courses to prepare him for his future role. Ben gripes but really does love learning all these things, especially on his terms (ADHD and stress + the public school system do not always go hand in hand). He’s a quick learner when he deems the information important and is made accessible to his learning needs.

- Ben definitely has ADHD speaking of which, it was nearly uncontrollable as a child bc his free-spirited parents didn’t believe in medicating. Ben convinced them he needed it and after some trial and error, found meds that worked. As he became more involved in heroics/growing up he had to change his medicine regimen (resulting in him being a bit more off the rails in OV) and needed antidepressants and therapy to manage it better. As an adult he has a whole litany of coping mechanisms (good and bad yes) and regularly checks in with his therapist and doctors to keep things under control. 

- Has a complicated relationship with his necrofriggian children. Considers himself their mother and worries after them. They too feel a connection to their parent despite this being unusual for their species. A few visit (some more than others) while they grow while others maintain distance. Ben never breathes a word of them to the media for fear of them being targeted. Still he keeps an eye on them and ensures all 14 mature to adulthood (another rarity for the species). Checks in every now and again with the ones who don’t want to see him and those that do. Two join the Plumbers and Ben is both proud and worried. His youngest becomes partners with Rook Ben.

- Just in general loves kids, they’re his favorite fans and while he’ll grumble at pushy adult fans he always smiles and kneels down for the little ones. Not so secretly wanted to have children of his own but knew it was a risk overall and used a lot of that energy with mentoring and teaching. Eventually had Kenny later in life (late 30s-40s) and was over the moon, becoming such a loving and doing parent or as much as he could be with his hectic schedule. 

- Omnitrix can’t come off, never has at any point since it first latched onto Ben’s arm. Azmuth tried and failed to get the device off, doesn’t let Ben know for many years as he feared the consequences. The watch loves and protects Ben even beyond it’s programming making him much more durable to damage and releasing energy charges when he’s threatened. Not even removing Ben’s arm would separate them. They’re stuck for life.

- Ben does have Anodite heritage but the Omnitrix actively suppresses it and uses the built up energy to power the transformations which is why ben is mostly unaffected by what should cause a massive energy drain on him. Theoretically if Ben learned to harness and safely use his Mana at an early age like Gwen he would have been fine but letting it build up without safe outlet meant activation would have killed him. Omnitrix Ben, however, went his whole life not knowing of his latent abilities and how the watch saved his life.

- Ben’s eyes get more green and glowy as time passes from the Omnitrix. At first they think its a trick of the light but by the time he’s an adult his eyes are pretty much glow in the dark. His veins light up too after long stretches of using the Omnitrix. Its vaguely unsettling to people who aren’t used to Ben.

- Max and the Earth Plumbers work so, so hard to keep teen Ben on Earth when half the universe is blowing up their comm lines asking for The Ben 10 to help with whatever problem of the day. Ben himself doesn’t quite understand when he’s younger the prestige and expectations on his shoulders. Max throws up a million and one roadblocks so Ben can live as normal a life as possible while he still can. Still, while doing that he Still overloads Ben with expectations and responsibilities on earth and beyond. He becomes a soldier again with Ben as their greatest weapon. He never forgave himself of losing sight of his grandson underneath the hero esp after Ben’s breakdown. 

- Rook partnership with Ben ends not long after Omniverse with his promotion to Magister. Ben tries to play it cool but the thought of another loved one/teammate leaving his tears him apart. Max revealing that Ben most likely wouldn’t get a new Plumber assigned partner since he’s almost an adult and won’t need it and Rook accidentally missing their last smoothie run due to a scheduling mishap causes Ben to snap and have the nervous breakdown that had been building for almost a decade. He completely loses it for a little while and needs to take an extended leave of absence from school and heroics that lasts about a year. Spends time recovering both on Earth and Galvan Prime, does some diplomatic training, learns about aliens, actually confronts the stress and loneliness of his life. He comes out the other side stronger but still fragile and exhausted.

- Ben’s above mentioned breakdown brings him closer to all his friends who didn’t quite realize the extent of Ben’s burden. Rook had been under the impression Ben didn’t like him all that much so the knowledge that his departure was the final straw for friend/hero’s collapse was shocking. Ben and Azmuth also become closer, the Galvan becoming fiercely protective of the boy seeing as his Earth family didn’t do well to keep him safe. It takes years for him to get over his anger at Max for putting so much on his grandchild. Ben makes more friends, in and out of the hero business, finally gets a therapist and gets some of his burdens eased a bit. It’s not a sure fire fix and Ben has several smaller breakdowns the rest of his life but its something.

- Azmuth was straight up suicidal before he met Ben for the first time. Ben gave him back hope for the universe and his ability to create items for peace not weapons. The boy infuriates him, frightens him, frustrates him but Azmuth cannot deny in his heart of hearts that he loves Ben dearly. He’s very upset at Ben’s breakdown and doesn’t know how to handle the worst of the initail outbursts. Azmuth talks Ben down from a suicide attempt. He reaches out to Ben that he Too felt overwhelmed by pressure, thought himself only good for war. Ben’s arrival in his life saved him and now he will do the same for Ben. It’s the first positive step forward in Ben’s recovery.

- For no other reason than I like it, Azmuth primarily refers to Ben as Benjamin (mostly to annoy the kid but he likes the way it sounds too) and Ben in softer, more serious moments. 

- Professor Paradox continues to flit in and out of Ben’s life. He says its because Ben is the most equipped to handle universal peril (true) but he’s also just very fond of the boy. Ben, existing in so many forms and having such importance also exists a beat outside of normal reality which Paradox identifies with. Ben is naturally attuned to time related problems because of this (instantly IDing Spanner as from the future before being told later deducing him to be his unborn son). Plus Ben named him, way back when. He’s just drawn to Ben.

- Adult Ben, while being seen as an impressively skilled fighter and champion, really has his strength as a universal diplomat of sorts. Based out of Earth, he helps mediate and defuse conflicts, advocate against tyranny and overall preserve peace and balance. He’s not perfect, he makes mistakes and sometimes is forced to become violent (and yes kill) but overall is regarded as a peacekeeper, something younger ben simply couldn’t understand. 

- Gwen gets her degree and primarily does work with advocacy and teaching about magic/alien culture. While she and Ben are still close, there’s a bit of a frustrated divide in that she isn’t helping him share the burden of the universe. Gwen never wanted to be a hero and has enough worth to not shackle herself to a job that’ll burn her out. Ben loves heroing but gives too much of himself away trying to fix everything. They get into screaming arguments that it wouldn’t be so bad out there if she just helped him but she refuses to budge and says he shouldn’t make himself do so much. They always make up and thy still are each other’s closest relationships.

- Ben marries Kai in a political move, Kai is Asexual and Ben Aromantic. They didn’t love each other but they got on well enough and Ben was really feeling the stress of carrying the hero burden so Kai also being involved made him feel like he wasn’t alone. Both were also so tired of the universe constantly asking about their love life and said ‘fuck it we’re married leave us alone’. Gwen was always mad about it feeling Ben deserved better but the two of them were happy with it. They had separate rooms, mostly separate lives but they became strong friends and supports with their strictly platonic marriage. They had Ken via Invitro in an incubator and were loving if extremely busy parents. 

- Also from the moment he appeared, Ben knew that Spanner was his future son, Kenny. He played ignorant and then was kind of deliberately teasing him in future encounters. He knew the rules of time and didn’t want to disrupt things further even if he was angry and worried as heck about why Ken felt the need to time travel. When future Ben catches up in the timeline, Kenny gets SUCH a lecture. 

- Ben isn’t quite immortal but he’s also not entirely human anymore either. The Omnitrix not only keeps him safe from most harm but it lightens the effect of aging. Ben 10 is active many, many years when most humans would have been forced to retire. He’s not sure how long the watch will keep him alive and it terrifies him. Gwen too is functionally immortal however she ages like a normal human, then when her natural death came, shed her skin and became a fulltime Anodite. So in the end, it was her and Ben together wondering which of them will die first. Gwen has trouble retaining her humanity as pure energy and swears she’ll let herself fizzle out when Ben goes. When that’ll be however...

[dreme-inc]

You Wear Their... Two!

South Park preference. Cartman, Kenny, Token, Jimmy, Heidi, and Red (feat. gender-neutral reader).

Honestly, they're all so happy, what can I say? Though, admittedly, Cartman continues being a smug little bug, like- see what I can get and what you singletons don't have, you know? It’s mostly because, somewhere deep down in the depths, small questions tend to pick at him a bit. Is he close to good enough? Do you deserve better and, mostly, does it mean he should let you go? He's naturally insecure on you (someone very great), but when he sees the slightly larger hat on your head, he almost offers you the matching gloves he wears in a heartbeat moment of weakness to your cuteness... Almost.

It’s Kenny’s parka, of course. I picture you in sweats or leggings, whichever is most your style, and he absolutely adores you in it (lightly a little more thirsty, too). In the beginning, he refrained from giving you the puffy orange jacket because, apparently, it’s cursed. As he sees you relaxing in your rooms however, wearing and enjoying because the clothing was his, he vowed to protect you against everything it’d bring (...please don’t leave the house, okay- if something happened because you were wearing the accursed thing, his heart couldn’t take it).

Token loves it, likely more than you both thought. The purple sweater with a buttoned shirt underneath is what I picture, existing so effortlessly fly; it takes his (and everyone else’s, really) breath away. He does a bunch at once, to be honest- hugging you because he can’t resist, assuring it’s yours whenever you want it, and even offering purchasing a match if it’s something you’re interested in. Adorable, both of you.

It isn’t you wearing Jimmy’s clothing necessarily, but one time he had to spend a night in the hospital and you were tasked with bringing his crutches. He needed something to make him smile, you’d think (in addition to you, of course, seeing you never failed to make him happy), so you initially walk into the room hanging onto them to cease any worrying. Then, you use them the rest of the way to the bedside and, without a single word, he’s smiling and laughing. Quite a superpower you’ve got there. “You’re so cu... cuuu- cuuu-... adorable.”

It’s comforting to Heidi. She lost the hat during the entire online fiasco, and it spanned into a few episodes without wearing one. It was after she gradually made some steady improvement she got it back- thanks to you, no less, having found and returned the floral accessory as a celebratory present. Another one to perhaps place it on your head spontaneously one day, she reminisces on what you meant to her during the time whenever she spots it on your head. It was ever easier to get better with you there- she wants to be with you, after all.

Red lends you her coat, like Bebe. It seems you’re one of those couples with the sweet moments without trying- she spots you headed out to the balcony and casually slips the coat from her shoulders. It’s placed on yours with a kiss to the cheek in one smooth move. “...and I- Oh! One sec, guys,” she’d politely interrupt herself, the coat dropping gently onto your shoulders, “Stay warm, babe.” And then casually turns to some smiling friends as you proceed giving her a hug from behind. It’s something else entirely when your relationship makes the people about you smile, too.

[ajokeformur-ray]

Tell me about what it's like living with Joker...

Lottie 😭🥺 thank you so so much for this ask, my love!💙

Under a cut if you wanna skip!

I moved in with Arthur quite quickly; only a few months passed between complimenting a blushing Carnival in the street outside Kenny’s Music and this relationship milestone. So much had passed between the two of us in that time that it seemed only natural for us to take that step, and though Arthur was nervous and unsure and I was hesitant and cautious, we had trust and love and it saw us through it all. Living with him isn’t always easy and it can be emotionally draining at times. He’s gone for most of the day up until he gets fired from Ha-Ha’s (asswipes), and then he’s always home with me. We have disagreements, like any couple, but we don’t ever fight. I have trauma associated with raised voices/shouting/’quiet’ anger and Arthur, while I make sure that he knows that he is more than free to express himself in any way that he wants to, also knows what his anger will do to me, and he’s very good at channeling his anger into something I can stomach. I don’t suppress his anger or force him to calm down, I wouldn’t ever want him to be any way other than he truly is, but Arthur would also rather die than make me upset, so we have separate time while he cools down, and then we come together and cuddle and we talk. All is forgiven when I am squeezed within our cuddle; I squeeze him back to acknowledge this, and then I am gifted with a tender, lingering forehead kiss and all is forgotten.

As an audience, we don’t know what Arthur’s medications were or what his mental illnesses were (though we can make educated guesses), so there’s no telling what the effects of his coming off of his medications were when his prescriptions ran out and he couldn’t afford his refills (he refused to let me buy them for him when I found out about it; he initially hid it from me), and that was a rollercoaster for me to deal with on top of my own life (most of which I would have happily dropped for him, but he never allowed me to do that), but we made it through. As I said - love. There is nothing I wouldn’t do for Arthur and in the early days did it sometimes feel like I was doing more for him than he was for me, but then I’d get into bed, mentally and physically exhausted, and Arthur would gravitate towards me like magnets existed between our bodies, or a red string which connected my ribs to his, and every thought like that would melt away in the face of his love. He’s so exhausted and so am I and sometimes that can mean that the love isn’t overt, but we do love each other. So, so much. It hurts in the most bittersweet way.

Time passes and it’s Joker now, darling. As an unspoken mutual decision, I only call him Arthur when I need his attention now or it’s an especially emotional moment, and he does the same for me. Otherwise, it’s pet names or a “hey”. Living with Joker is somehow both unpredictable and stable. He is most often gone when I wake up in the morning and I mostly spend my days alone doing whatever needs to be done inside and outside of the apartment. Which is perfect for me because I am a very solitary person. I need alone time and I’m very protective of it. Joker usually saunters home as the sun dips below the horizon. Sometimes he stays for the night and sometimes he’s only home for a few hours, long enough for me to check him over for any injuries, hand wash the blood out of his clothes and get them dried for him, get him dinner etc. etc. before he’s off again. It depends on his mood. Either way, I completely look after him as best as I can and I love on him as hard as I can every single day, and Joker does the very same for me.

We eat together. We shower together - I wash Joker in my products and he washes me in mine so that even when one or the other is absent, the scents surround and keep us safe within the love which we share. We sleep together. Joker and I do everything domestic together because both of us find genuine joy in one another’s company. But more than that, neither of us like to take care of ourselves. We do, however, like to take care of each other and in this way do we both get taken care of. Our relationship isn’t perfect and there are tensions, insecurities, doubts, worries, fears, but we have so much love that we transcended physicality and that is what brings us home to one another every single day, and not even Death do us part.

Living with Joker is perfect and I wouldn’t change a single thing about it or him for all the money in the world.

[unlikely-allies]

Because this is the second time that I have read Tithe by Holly Black, I decided to do something a little different. Instead of writing a review, I have decided to write my thoughts that I had while reading the book, similar to what is done when someone live tweets a television show. This obviously means that this post CONTAINS SPOILERS.

By the way I highly recommend this entire series.

Here we go,

• Just how many times has Kaye’s mom sipped a beer with a cigarette butt in it and not noticed? • I’m thinking this venue is not exactly a high-class establishment. • At least she noticed the cigarette butt in her beer. • It’s bad when adults are asking a teenager for money when she delivers Chinese food for a living. • I’m glad she mentioned they were on Philly because I would’ve assumed they were in NYC with the “before someone smashed the window and stole the equipment” statement. • The mention of cat-yellow eyes immediately made me think of Magnus Bane. • Disappointed it is not Magnus Bane. • Asking your daughter for a cigarette. Wow mom of the year. • A possession and an almost stabbing and it isn’t even Chapter 1 yet. • The Jersey Shore is better than Philly, but not by much. • “Guys don’t like weird.” Oh honey, you’d be surprised. • “Don’t you want a boyfriend?” “Why bother with that? Let’s find incubi.” Yes Kaye and I would get along just fine. • Kaye’s brand of morbid grunge is definitely something I can appreciate. • Janet doesn’t seem like a great friend. • Glad I’m not the only one who can’t wear stockings without destroying them. • Who hasn’t been dragged along by their friend so that they can go hangout with a boy they want to impress, while you get stuck with the guy’s friends? Good times. • So the broken carousel horse actually came to life or no? • Ok, so Kenny’s an asshole and Janet has terrible taste in guys. • At least Janet actually blamed Kenny and not Kaye. • I have to say, the fashion choices so far are really something. • Corny, there is no such think as too-sweet coffee. • I feel like following a cry that is coming from the woods never ends well. • So a man holding a sword in the woods is thankfully not something that I ever encountered while I was in New Jersey. • So Kaye’s imaginary friends exist and faeries are real and Kaye can see them. Glad we are all caught up. • Pretty sure you aren’t suppose to pull arrows out, but what do I know I’ve never been shot with an arrow before. • Roiben of the Unseelie Court <3 • Aren’t Kelpies supposed to eat people? • So does Kaye not get to ask her 3 questions or? • If Kaye’s grandma doesn’t like the way Kaye’s mom turned out, maybe forcing Kaye to abide by the same rules her mother did growing up isn’t the best idea. • Issac and Armageddon are the best rat names ever. • Lutie’s dirty doll song is amazing. • Are any real life guys actually named Robin? Asking for a friend. • I’m beginning to think Kaye’s mom Ellen may have a drinking problem. • “His hair was a longish brown mop, cut too short in the front and too long in the back.” So basically Corny has a mullet. • Kenny is definitely an asshole. Still not sure how I feel about Janet, but she deserves better. • “Everything is danger.” Well then. • Note to self: listen to White Rabbit by Grace Slick. • Nothing could be more boring than working the graveyard shift at a gas station. Poor Corny, no wonder you’re so angsty. • QUICK CHECK!!! • Corny coming out to his mom using a Star Trek reference is the best thing that I’ve ever heard. • Kenny, it’s not being an insecure girlfriend if she walked in on you kissing another girl. • A hot faerie knight appearing in a diner definitely never happened to me in NJ. • Rath Roiben Rye is one hell of a name. • That was an aggressive way to literally kiss someone’s ass. • Back to not liking Janet. Kaye just got thrown to the ground by essentially a stranger and Janet’s biggest concern is telling Kaye she won’t get Kenny. • Afternoon tea with the Unseelie Court could be quite the event. • If the Unseelie Court is known for its cruelty, maybe stealing from them wasn’t the best idea. • Nothing like telling Kaye she’s a faerie and following it up with telling her she needs to be taken as the tithe sacrifice. • Not only are you a faerie, but you’re actually green. Surprise! • Corny handled Kaye’s molting about as well as anyone could. Definitely better than I would have. • Nothing like discovering that you have wings in a gas station bathroom. • I’m not sure how trustworthy Google’s knowledge of changelings is going to be. • Corny is a much better friend than Janet. • Would the Kelpie be able to read Equestrian Digest? • Its common knowledge that eating or drinking in faerie is dangerous. Kaye does both immediately upon arrival. • Oh Corny, you snuck into faerie and drank the wine and now you’re gambling with Unseelie faeries… • Naphamael is definitely the guy that made me think of Magnus. • Poor Roiben can’t take a visible liking towards anything or it will be used against him. • “If curiosity killed the cat, it was satisfaction that brought him back.” • There are a lot of cat references in this book. • Corny would find a booty-call in faerie. • Possibly a scary botty-call. • Kaye’s grandmother is a real pain in the ass. • No one should refuse a job based on a fear that boys won’t date them because of it. • “I get sacrificed, I guess.” “Great. When is that?” Corny is precious. • There’s no way Kenny knows what besotted means. • Not-Magnus is the one who hooked up with Corny. • The Palace of Termites couldn’t sound more unappealing. • Roiben’s door is shaped like a unicorn. How whimsical. • Roiben can come braid my hair whenever he wants. • How dare not-Magnus embarrass may poor baby Corny. • The Unseelie Queen is a real bitch for “gifting Kaye to Roiben and then ordering him to offer her up to be sacrificed. • Roiben is a badass. He gets struck by an axe and still manages to kill the Unseelie Queen. • He told her to use his name and now he’s mad at her for using it? • Ah, it’s because she’s a pixie and not a human. He thinks she’ll sell his name for her own gain. • Roiben must be one intimidating guy to still look dangerous while wrapped in a pink comforter. • So did we just leave Corny at the Unseelie Court? • I can’t picture scary Roiben eating honey on bread like a little kid. • Now we remember Corny. • Ooooo, flirty witty banter from Roiben. • Why are we going to the rave and not immediately to save Corny? • Not all that upset about Janet dying to be honest. • Kaye just broke into a car whiel wearing a green frock coat in broad daylight. • Sarcastic, sassy Roiben is my favorite Roiben. • “I would not.” Go Roiben. • “I love her still, more’s the pity.” No Roiben, no. • At least `King Not-Magnus hasn’t killed Corny yet. • No! King Not-Magnus knows Roiben’s full name! • I’d pay good money to see Roiben dance, as cruel as forced dancing may be. • “The Seelie Court arrived.” Oh damn. • Not-Magnus was acting on the Seelie Queen’s orders. Even bigger damn. • Poor sweet baby Corny is going to have some serious PTSD. • Roiben, self-declared King of the Unseelie Court! • My boy Roiben has game for days. He can come trade kisses with me any day. • We have clarified nothing about what Kaye and Roiben plan to do about their relationship and I am not ok with that even though I know what happens.

[writing-radionoises]

❝ GET A LOAD OF THIS MONSTER ! ❞

Irony is something common in this world. For example, you best friend, Craig, is a ghost, and his husband, Tweek, is a witch. Actually, he's more of a ghost hunter. Wendy is a fallen angel, and her girlfriend, Bebe, is a succubus. Cartman is a demon, and his ex-girlfriend is a nymph. You find that ironic because Heidi was the calmest, sweetest, forest nymph in existence. All she wanted was someone to care for her the way Mother Nature had once. However, after Cartman, she became rather chaotic an aggressive. She doesn't trust men anymore, which is why when you go to see her, you keep your female form.   You don't see much of him, but you know that Token is an angel while Clyde is a fairy. You can kind of see how they got attached to each other, but no relationship could also fit quite as well as Stan and Kyle's. Tweek and Craig was pretty close to a perfect relationship, outside of the irony of it. Stan is one of Satan's twins, keeper of Hellhounds. So, as expected, he's a rather powerful person an to be feared. Kyle, on the other hand, has telekinesis. You like to call him Carrie, in reference to the popular book. Not ot mention how similar the two seem at times. The ginger has always had trouble with anger. Seeing that you've introduced all your friends into this story, it might be a wise idea to throw yourself into the mix. Your name is Kenny McCormick, you're a succubus. Before the reader assumes anything, you do have morals. You have a little girl at home, she's not biologically yours, but you like to call her your own. Karen, that's her name. She was dumped off due to being half angel and half demon, no creature wanted her but you. And you make sure she knows that. You cherish Karen constantly, yoru free time goes into loving her and doing things with her. It's not her fault she was born this way. She has found some interest in some of your other friends' siblings and such. Craig's little living sister, Tricia, is one of her best friends. Kyle's brother, Ike, is the same way. Tricia has always been highly involved in your world, more than her own. You've expected this, considering that she lost her brother at such a young age and, until recently, had never actually seen his ghost form. However, that does not stop Craig from being overprotective of her. Ike is Kyle's adopted brother, is the son of a demon and a human, though was raised by a witch for most of his life. Thus, Ike is someone who visits hell on weekends and every other Christmas while also possessing the talent of witchcraft since he was two. Now days, at age thirteen, Ike is raised by Kyle's mother, a simple human. He practices witchcraft on his own. Speaking of ages, Karen's birthday was a couple days ago. That's mainly why you're aware of all the current events in your friends circle, as all of you gather every time one of you turns thirteen, eighteen, or thirty. Significant ages for creatures like your own. Most of you weren't met to live past fifteen. It's easy to say that you have had a tiring and worrisome week.  For one, it was the first event Craig had actually revealed himself to everyone at. Since Tricia turned thirteen a couple months ago, he decided it was probably time to stop hiding himself. He isn't a pleasant sight to wake up to first in the morning, though it sure was a surprise for Tricia to find out that, yes, while Craig was nineteen, he still had the body of an eleven year old. It was also quite a mess when you had to shove Bebe in the closet when she tried to give the kids Sex ED. It explains why you're here in the bar, now. You just wanna get laid, or maybe find some friends. Whatever cleanses your mind of worrying. While Tweek and Craig were watching the kids during their sleepover, you couldn't help but worry. Most mythical creatures don't survive after thirteen. Especially cross breeds. That's when a very sober blond sits beside you and tilts their head to the side. Their eyes are a light blue, and you can just barely see hints of a sunflower tattoo on their shoulder. They wore a light blue sweater, like their eyes, and a white skirt that fell to their knees. "What's a pretty gal like you doing in here?" They ask, very clearly confused. "Could ask you the same thing," you responded, taking a sip from your cup. It takes you a moment to register that they referred to you as female, as you quickly glance down at your outfit and nod to yourself. Right form. They roll their eyes, a slight smile on their face, "Well, I'm Marjorine, but most people call me Butters. Came out here to find a witch, I think his name was Tweek . . . ? My parents said I'm sick, hehe . . ." You smile back, realizing that they meant no harm, "I'm Mackenzie, but call me Kenny. I know Tweek, he's busy tonight. Mind me asking for your pronouns? And why they say your sick?"   Marjorine stares for a moment before snapping back to reality and nodding, "Oh, uh, well . . . Gender neutral, I guess. They say I'm sick because I'm genderfluid . . ." Your smile quickly turns upside down as you pat them gently. It seems your aura has drawn this one to you. You always get the insecure ones, it seems. "I may seem a bit quick to judge, but . . . Wanna come to my place? Get it on?" You question, an eyebrow raised and a smirk on your lips. You've done this one too many times. They freeze for a moment, staring up at you in both confusion and slight fear, "I-I'm sorry, what?" "Sex. I want you to fuck me," you clarify voice raised back up to a normal tone instead of a seductive whisper. "No." The stern answer that comes out of their mouth surprises you, confusing you before you proceed to convince. "Aww, come on. I can be anything you want. I can male," with a snap of your fingers, your long blond hair is cut short, and your jawline sharp. "I can be a masculine female," snap. "I can a feminine male." snap. "I can even be all of the above, or neither." Snap. Your form changes to whatever you say. Brunette. Noirette. Ginger. Tattoos. No tattoos. Piercings. Anything and everything the blond wants. Yet, they still shake their head. "You be what you wanna be, fella. It's wrong for me to tell you how to present," Marjorine answered, reaching to pull something on their shoulder, only to discover it wasn't there. Your mind draws a blank as you half mindedly snap your fingers and return to your female form. You've never dealt with someone who said no. "What's the problem? Got a girlfriend or a wife to worry about? They won't find out~" You continue to try and persuade, yet Marjorine shakes their head once again. "Sorry, I'm not interested," they smiled cheerfully, "Sex isn't something I want to experience yet. I'd like to get to know you, though." Your brain shuts down, deciding that maybe it wasn't worth the trouble as you continue talking to them, "Fine, fine. What do you want to know?" "You're a succubus, aren't you? Kyle told me something about how people up here aren't normal. He wanted me to find a witch named Tweek an that his husband would be able to help me . . ." Marjorine said, beginning to ramble before shutting themselves up. You nod along with the phrases, "Yeah, there's only a couple humans up here. They're mainly hippies trying to get away from society," you say with a snicker of laughter. "What kind of creatures are up here?" They question, leaning over the bar as their curious blue eyes pour into your violet ones. You begin to ramble on about everyone you've met up here in the small mountain town of South Park. You mainly talk about Kyle and his powers, how he threw you through a wall in rage one time, and how he met Stan. It quickly turns into you talking about Stan and his twin brother, Damien, as the two sons of Satan. You talk about Tweek and Craig, about how they knew each other since kindergarten when Craig died very suddenly and Tweek took on his mother's place as the family witch. You don't mention how Craig died or Tweek's dad. You felt sickened to even mention his mom, even though she had nothing to do with all the drama between the Tweaks an Tuckers. You change the subject to Tricia, Ike, and Karen. You talk about how they're the only surviving mythical children up here so far, about how Karen is practically your daughter and how protective Craig can get over the three. Marjorine listens intently to all you have to say, they say they met Kyle in middle school, before he snapped and moved away from the big city to conceal his powers. They used to be close to Cartman before they figured out how much he was manipulating them. You two talk for hours on end before you decide you need to get home, and offer to take Marjorine with you to see Tweek and Craig since they were babysitting at his house. You take Marjorine home, where Kyle welcomes them from the house next door using the name Butters. They talk for a bit and marjorine mentions they'd rather go by that  name than Butters, the ginger apologies and you head inside. Tweek sits in the living room, doodling something while you head upstairs to check on your dark angel. Ike, Tricia, and Karen lay on the mattress on the floor, covered in blankets an plushies with a flashlight on next to Karen's side of the bed. Craig isn't far from the bed, sitting in a chair and playing with one of the baby dolls Tricia brought. Hearing you open the door, he blindly looks around for the source of the sound with his empty and bloody sockets. You tap on the door and his blank gaze meets your bright one. "K . . . Kenny?" He questions, voice raspy and dry. You nod, forgetting he can't see such an action and adding on, "Yeah, it's me. Is Karen okay?" He cracks a weak smile, the moonlight reflecting off of the glass pieces in his neck, "Better than ever."

[traitor-boyfriend]

why do you think kyman is so popular? (ew)

okay so this has been sitting in my inbox for about a week or so now and i really just need to answer it and get it over with. really i think this is the most i’m ever going to say at length about kyman so here we go. also i’ve been drinking a little so i apologize in advance if my thoughts aren’t as cohesive as they could be lmao

to answer the initial question, i honestly have no idea. i have a few theories, but no real concrete answer as to why kyman as a ship is so popular; i’m speaking as someone who has had an intimate awareness of this fandom from the time i was ten, which is literally half of my life. i can’t recall kyman being a big ship, or even one of the more common rare-pairs 10 years ago – back then the major ships were style, creek, and k2 (almost pretty much in that order). 

kyman, as i know it and have observed it since i’ve re-familiarized myself with the show and its fandom, is more a development that’s largely happened within the past five years and i think the main contributor to this is that, within that same time period, there’s been a noticeable shift with how kyle and cartman’s dynamic has been written; in the beginning seasons, kyle and cartman are shown to equally despise each other. the cartman of seasons 1-4 isn’t exactly the cartman we know now – he started off as kind of a stereotypical fat little neighborhood bully, but he’s always been narcissistic, racist, selfish etc. just not to the same extent he is now. and back then, kyle and cartman interact as enemies would; they argue and fight constantly, openly express their disdain for each other to anyone who will listen, and actively conspire against the other. kyle and cartman were direct foils to each other. 

this has changed in the recent past. cartman and kyle aren’t really considered enemies anymore, but instead as rivals which i think is an important thing to note. now, they’re even occasionally on the same side of a conflict or event (such as tfbw). there has been a lot of focus in the past five or six seasons in the ways kyle and cartman are similar; they’re both temperamental and very angry people, incredibly competitive, both very driven and committed when they set their mind to something. kyle, to a lesser degree, also shares one of cartman’s worst traits; they’re both over-reactive and allow themselves to think the world is out to get them. obviously – and i cannot stress this enough – kyle has in no way the victim complex cartman has, but it is there nonetheless. the running theme with season 21 has been self-victimization, and while i don’t entirely agree with their idea that the potential destructive effects of habitual othering and alienation is, like, a concept of personal responsibility or individual desire to be a victim, other than heidi, kyle is a great example of this. for the last three seasons kyle has been the whipping boy in that no one wants his speeches, no one wants his moral lesson; no one wants his opinion. and kyle indirectly and without meaning to spearheads canada being bombed because he allows his emotions to dictate his action. there’s too many instances of cartman doing this exact thing with obvious malicious intent, but “the list” is another notable episode where kyle does the same thing; he feels slighted and estranged when everyone thinks he’s ugly, and instead of listening to reason from either stan or abraham lincoln, he decides the best choice of action is to burn down the school. my point is, kyle and cartman share quite a few personality traits and their interactions in recent seasons tend to highlight and expand on this rather than to treat them as divisive, opposite characters.

they’ve done a lot more as well to show that kyle, unlike his very early characterization in-series where he couldn’t give less of a shit if cartman died, now cares for him on – at the very least– a humanistic level. whereas kenny and stan are still mostly indifferent to cartman and what happens to him, kyle now often objects to directly conspiring to hurt or let cartman put himself in danger, even if he still despises him as a person. this started around season 8 or so with “up the down steroid” and i think this quote from kyle when he goes to cartman’s house best sums up what i’m talking about:

“I know that I often have serious moral objections to the things that you do, but… this time I think you really need to reconsider. Because if you do this, I believe you will go to hell. So I feel it is my responsibility, as your friend, to tell people what you’re doing, and to put a stop to it.”

kyle’s constant drive to put a stop to cartman’s increasingly deranged and morally depraved antics are largely driven by a dedication to his ethics, yes, but this also shows that kyle does consider cartman a friend and objects to his behavior as such because he cares about what happens to him despite kyle routinely being repulsed and disgusted by who cartman is. he also is the only one to initially object to destroying cartman’s stuff in season 20, even though kyle is cartman’s most vocal and frequent critic, and is also shown to feel an inordinate amount of guilt than the other boys comparatively; this is a combination of kyle’s generally guilty personality as well as remorse for having done something to hurt a friend. there’s also the jewpacabra episode where, even after being pathologically belittled again for the millionth time on the basis of his being jewish by cartman, kyle still goes out in the middle of the night to unchain cartman, take him home, and put him in his bed. i worry this is beginning to sound like rationalization or even evidence on the kyman ship’s behalf that kyle has feelings for cartman in anyway, because it isn’t; it’s just elaboration on kyle’s character. kyle is a very sympathetic person, and that extends even to someone who he doesn’t like. there are plenty of examples of kyle being absolutely thrilled to see cartman be delivered a comeuppance or get the shit kicked out of him or be proven wrong, and more often than not, kyle genuinely hates cartman – there just are not as many recent examples, which is the time-frame i’m trying to stick to while talking about this ship.

there’s a lot to be said of cartman as a character. like, a lot. he’s incredibly complex, and while it makes him interesting as a character study, it makes him insufferable to watch. he’s always been terrible. that’s his appeal, i think, and what makes him so popular. cartman is the complete and utter embodiment of human id; he has no sense of the world outside himself, no remorse, and acts consistently in his own self-interest with little to deter him. and part of it is satisfying sometimes to see just how far cartman is willing to denigrate himself and others in pursuit of what he wants, because it’s that same morbid desire a normal person might occasionally feel but suppresses because of their conscience – something cartman does not have. 

i’d argue, given the inherent chaos and destruction and amorality the universe of south park exists in, that all of the main boys are traumatized to varying degrees. but i don’t think it’s all that controversial to say cartman exhibits the most outward signs of childhood trauma. plenty of people much more observant and intelligent than myself i’m sure have written about this before so i’m going to keep it brief, but a lot of cartman’s behavior can be explained this way. there’s been a few allusions to his having been sexually abused, inappropriate sexual contact with family members, the fact that he wets his bed or cries at night b/c he doesn’t have a dad are all things we learn when he can’t control what he says in “le petit tourette.” his physical and verbal aggression, emotionality, distrust of others, conniving behavior etc. are all common symptoms of adverse childhood experiences. he’s controlling and insecure, and cartman thrives off any and all attention – positive, which he often gets from his mother, or negative, which is usually provided by literally everyone else, especially kyle, which is what i think makes him so infatuated with kyle in that he’s an easy, reliable source to match his own aggression, to feed that desire for attention. unlike what a lot of kyman shippers think, it’s pretty obvious that this is why he goes to such lengths to save kyle in “smug alert”. butters doesn’t fight or push back against cartman the way he does, therefore cartman isn’t receiving the attention or reaction he wants.

there’s also the matter of cartman’s racism and anti-semitism. and to deny that cartman does not possess genuine confidence in his own deluded beliefs, or to excuse it b/c of his age is a major cop-out. he’s had moments where his racial hatred is founded in classic white-supremacist talking points, so he clearly espouses this shit of his own volition. because he’s attracted to power cartman idolizes conservative christian figureheads in pop culture (mel gibson ring a bell to anyone) and authoritarian dictators, of which racism is often a major component of such ideology, and this only emboldens his bigotry. there’s a couple instances in the very early seasons (i’m talking, like, pretty much exclusively 1 and 2) where cartman alludes to his racist tendencies stemming from liane, but i don’t really consider it fair to cling to that as a canonical source b/c one, it’s almost always for shock value as a quick joke, and two, they have since done a complete 180 on liane. they don’t harp on the joke about her being a whore the way they used to, and instead she’s shown to be a single mother who works two jobs and who loves her son unconditionally. but she’s also very lonely, and treats cartman as her friend instead of her son; she has no boundaries set with him and often entertains his schemes or delusions; she’s a classic over-indulging parent. which does a lot of harm without her meaning to. 

honestly, the entire relationship between cartman and his mother mostly just makes me sad, especially after the “tsst” episode; it’s the only time we see liane disciplining cartman in a firm but loving way, acting as a parent and not a hostage, and we see, in my opinion, what was the only instance wherein which cartman was capable of any meaningful or permanent change. and it’s all destroyed when liane realizes cesar and her’s relationship was purely professional and nothing more. even in group of moms, liane isn’t really considered one of them. her only friend is cartman, so she defaults to giving in to his every whim b/c she’s terrified of him resenting and leaving her as well. it’s like.. a really tragic situation. but that episode is important as it exemplifies the fact that, unlike the other boys, cartman incapable of change. his transformation is mostly superficial and incredibly short-lived. there’s a lot to be said of the nature of evil – whether some people are born that way, if it’s entirely nature vs. nurture – but cartman is obviously a combination of both; no one who doesn’t have some kind of genetic pre-dispostion to incalculable levels of cruelty and disregard for the suffering of others could plot to have someone’s parents killed, steal their bodies, grind them into chili and feed it to the child of those parents over sixteen dollars.

and this is what makes the cognitive dissonance that surrounds thinking kyman isn’t an abusive ship is astounding to me, because cartman is an inherently abusive person. he is incapable of the vulnerability or the selflessness or the compromise a relationship requires. i mean, christ, we just got an entire season that highlights how he acts within the confines of a romantic relationship with heidi – an entire season of cartman manipulating, gaslighting, and machinating events to have someone he supposedly loves killed or abducted. there’s an argument made pretty often among kyman fans that this wouldn’t happen to kyle, that kyle is capable of fighting back against cartman and would refuse to make himself vulnerable the way heidi did, but i have no idea how someone could says this after “ginger cow.”

kyle is by far the most frequent recipient of the proverbial short stick (passion of the jew, le petit tourette, tonsil trouble, pee, humancentipad, imaginationland, cartman’s incredible gift, etc b/c the list goes on and fucking on) and though cartman is not always the one directly spearheading the events that lead to kyle being put in those situations, he usually is. but the way he treats kyle in ginger cow differs so greatly from past events – a lot of cartman’s mistreatment of kyle can be viewed as him feeling he’s delivering punishment or retribution to a someone who he feels (wrongly) deserves it, but “ginger cow” just really epitomizes cartman’s complete and utter sociopathy. what he does to kyle in that episode is so far beyond mere humiliation; it’s dehumanization. cartman actively derives joy from breaking kyle down as a person, forcing him to be submissive, causing kyle to lose any sense of self. the kicker comes at the end of the episodes when stan’s misguided attempt to help ends up backfiring, but not really, because the prophecy of the red heifer had actually been true all along! yet cartman refuses to tell the truth; kyle’s suffering means nothing. and cartman, in true cartman fashion, makes a snide joke, farts into his hand, dollops whip cream in his palm and smears it in kyle’s face, walking off very satisfied with himself. even thinking about the episode makes me viscerally ill. 

i think just as troubling for me is the culture that surrounds people shipping the two of them; there is so, so, so much casual anti-semitism – people who think it’s cute when cartman accosts kyle for being jewish, people who use the word “jew” in a flippant, casual way as if it’s a term of endearment while completely ignoring the historical context of disparagement in a non-jewish person calling someone “a jew.” people who excuse cartman’s anti-semitism, who act like he hasn’t repeatedly been shown to adore hitler and emulate him, going as far as to rally the town behind him to lead in the effort to exterminate the jews and shouting nazi rallying cries. not to mention the fact that not only does there exist any one singular kyman fic centered around kyle being a holocaust victim during world war ii, there are a ton! which is so disgusting and disrespectful and so obviously amoral i can’t believe i just had to type that! and in the same line as fiction, it is so upsetting to me a prominent trend that occurs w kyman fics is cartman basically hatefucking kyle through the entire thing, physically and verbally abuses him and gets off on it, and kyle is this submissive, simpering slave to him – not to mention the plethora of straight up rape/non-con kyman fics. it a lot of either that, or kyle is some conduit for a shitty cartman redemption arc, and. ugh.

anyway, this is the most i’m ever going to say about kyman. the tl;dr version of this is that i think kyman is so popular b/c recent seasons have focused more on amplifying the ways in which kyle and cartman are similar as well as quite a few jokes being made about some weird sexual tension between the two of them. and not to harp on this, but i don’t ship kyman, and i don’t support it or even remotely tolerate it, really. the entire concept of those two together makes me quite literally physically ill lmao.