#HIS PAST LOVER RETURNED BUT AT THE COST OF HIS MEMORY

[wickjump]

btw this is crepic block me if you don’t get it (don’t do that i am an attention seeker because i was emotionally neglected as a child) (rambling in tags)

[saintobio]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐃 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐓. (final part to 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐍 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐑.)

in the painful memory of what once was, sylus learns that love can't be bound where it was never meant to stay.

♱ pairings. sylus, fem!reader

♱ genre. angst, smut, boss/assistant, 18+

♱ tags. sylus's pov, reader is not l&ds!mc, sylus might be ooc, main story spoilers, razor's dance spoilers, nightplumes spoilers, lots of timeskip, fast-paced, unrequited love, profanity, petnames (kitten, sweetie), espionage, jealousy, brief smut, mentions of pregnancy/impregnation kink, mentions of accidents, suicide attempt, injuries, blood, usage of guns, usage of knife, killings, death, my own theories incorporated into the lore, sylus groveling bcos yall want him to

♱ notes. 9.5k wc. l&ds!mc is referred to here as 'diana'. THIS IS A REPOST of the original post i accidentally deleted. i already posted this several hours ago, so if you’re seeing this new one again, blame my dumbass 🤧 oh well life is life.

Sylus had a part of him that wished things could be different. 

Ever since he turned away and left you that night at the alleyway, he didn’t really realize the chain of events his decision would set into motion. He simply underestimated how strongly your threats were backed by the grudge you had on him for bringing the hunter girl from Linkon into his base.

After all, you were just an assistant of his. And her, she was everything to him. It wasn’t just about the Aether Core, too—their bond stretched back into his distant past, into another planet where two of them ruled before the inhabitants of Philos came to ruin everything. Him and Diana had a connection he couldn’t sever no matter how much you had come to mean to him. And he spent years, centuries even, just to search for her. 

So, how could a mere assistant he had known for less than a decade have such entitlement to her role in his life? 

Eventually, days turned into weeks. Weeks into months. With your prolonged absence from the Onychinus base, Sylus’s business transactions and illicit deals had become increasingly unruly. He had grown too dependent on you as his right-hand woman, relying on your meticulous management to ensure all his illegal activities ran smoothly. Yet now, without your oversight, things were falling apart.

And while he was contemplating how to fill the void your absence had created, the office door slammed open. A subordinate soon rushed in, breathless and wide-eyed. “Boss, she’s betrayed us!” Luke exclaimed. “She’s gone to the Hunter’s Association. We got word that she was a high-ranking intelligence agent there!”

“A.K.A a spy!” yelled the other twin, Kieran, who looked equally hurt at your betrayal. “She fooled all of us. And here, we treated her like family.” 

That was how Sylus learned that you had left the N109 Zone, seeking refuge in Linkon City, and had exposed critical intel on Onychinus. At the time, rage naturally exploded within him. Didn’t he take good care of you while you were here? He had given you everything, trusted you, and you had thrown it all away. Four years of falling into his trap. Four years of being his partner in crime, his right-hand woman, his lover. People even saw you as the modern day Bonnie & Clyde. Sylus couldn’t understand the root of your betrayal, couldn’t imagine how letting you slip away from his grasp would cost him so much in return.

When you vowed to do everything in your power to kill Diana, was this just a part of your grand scheme? What other machinations were you orchestrating in your pursuit of revenge?

“She’s a wild animal on loose.” Sylus looked up at the twins, maintaining a calm yet ruthless mien as he sat on the couch. He might be idly tossing a coin like he didn’t care, but inside his brain was chaos ensuing. “Where’s she now? Any news?”

It was Luke who shrugged in response. “She hasn’t been seen anywhere, boss-man.”

“We suspect the Association is hiding her,” Kieran added. 

The hunter girl, Diana—the very girl you were jealous of, was sitting next to Sylus throughout the conversation. Their hands were connected by a strong energy linkage that was seemingly ignited by the Aether Cores in their bodies. They couldn’t separate themselves even if they wanted to. And God forbid you would have lost your mind tenfold had you seen their situation right now. 

“That g-girl,” gasped the hunter girl, eyes wide in bewilderment at what she was hearing. “Sylus, your assistant. She did all that? She was a spy from the Hunter’s Association?” 

Luke tilted her head at the girl, his beaked mask mocking her. “Oh, miss hunter! Haven’t you heard about the HIS? You should know them better than us.” 

“Well.. what is the HIS?” 

“Hunter Intelligence Services.” Sylus was the one who answered, releasing a deep sigh while rubbing his temples. “They’re top secret. Regular hunters wouldn’t have known about them, because they only deal with people like me.” 

Diana looked between him and the twins, rubbing her wrist before moving closer to the boss of Onychinus. Her close proximity allowed him to smell her familiar sweet scent. “Is she… after me? But I don’t understand. If she’s part of the Hunter’s Association too, then shouldn’t we be colleagues?”

Kieran cleared his throat. “Ever since you came—”

“Place a bounty on her head,” Sylus interrupted the twins, and also ignored the question of the girl next to him. She didn’t need to learn the history behind you and him, or why you chose to target her. “Make sure to bring Y/N back to me. Alive.” 

“Roger that, boss!” 

It was his last desperate attempt to draw you back to him. Now that you had the Hunter’s Association protecting you, Sylus knew that locating you wouldn’t be as simple. Otherwise, he would have easily captured Diana long ago. He convinced himself that the bounty was to punish you, but deep down, he knew it was because he couldn’t bear to lose you to his enemies completely.

~~

It took you a year to return to the N109 Zone.

Did you forget he had eyes and ears everywhere? He was the boss of that infamous No-Hunt Zone. Even if you leaked intel about his residences and the Onychinus base to the Hunter’s Association, Sylus still had a few tricks up his sleeve. He had hideouts in places that even you weren’t aware of, and the residents of the N109 Zone were loyal to him. Too loyal that they wouldn’t give any information to anyone no matter the consequences. 

And how foolish were you to forget about Mephisto’s existence?

“Caw! Caw!”

The mechanical crow’s eyes glowed with the same red hue as Sylus’s as it landed on his arm, projecting visions of you entering the underground fight club disguised in an Onychinus uniform. It was almost farcical that you thought you could infiltrate a place Sylus frequented unnoticed.

But then, the vision shifted to you speeding on a motorcycle with a truck in hot pursuit. Sylus quickly recognized the truck’s decals—it was the hitman he often employed for dealing with his enemies, now terrorizing you in a high-speed chase. Without hesitation, Sylus grabbed his leather jacket and mounted his own bike, racing to your location in sixth gear.

He arrived just a minute too late. And what was meant to be a dramatic reunion turned into a scene of you lying unconscious and injured on the road, while the hitman grinned nearby with an expression of triumph. If it hadn’t been for your helmet, Sylus would have been met with the gruesome sight of your shattered skull.

“Mr. Sylus!” the hitman exclaimed, jumping out of his truck with arms outstretched in petty victory. “Can I get the $500,000,000 in cash?”

As Sylus’s gaze fell on your unconscious, injured body sprawled on the ground, a surge of anguish overwhelmed him in ways he couldn’t understand. But it was quickly replaced by seething rage—rage that made him summon his black-red mist, enveloping the hitman in its dark tendrils.

“I said not to harm her,” Sylus growled, his red eye glowing ominously against the desolate highway backdrop. “You failed your task.”

“P-Please, Mr. Sylus! I thought you—”

Without another word, Sylus scooped you up in his arms while his mist dealt with the hitman behind him. The hitman’s desperate cries were soon drowned out by the expanding tendrils, which tightened around him until he was engulfed. Then, in a violent burst, the mist exploded, reducing the hitman and everything around him to dust.

Sylus brought you to his underground hideout immediately after. And an unfamiliar—or perhaps strange—pang tugged at his heart as he gently laid you in bed, his gaze lingering on the road rash you obtained from the crash. The injuries were severe, with patches of skin nearly stripped away in the most brutal fashion he could think of. He could only imagine the burning pain you had to endure as soon as you skidded along the gravel, and Sylus felt his own frustrations knocking at the door knowing that he didn’t have the power to extend his fast-healing abilities to you.

“Tch. My kitten’s reckless as always, riding without the proper gear,” Sylus grumbled, looking at your unconscious body. “You’ve never been one to follow the rules, have you?”

To make up for his inability to save you on time, he applied a potent medicinal ointment all over your body and placed you in an anesthetized state while you healed. His mist enveloped you like a protective shroud the entire time you laid in bed unconscious. Every single day, Sylus tended to your wounds, changing your clothes and bandages, and applying the ointments over your bare body. He even took special care to ensure the twins did not enter your room without his permission. 

Despite the care he showed, a persistent question echoed in his mind: Why am I doing this for you? You were his enemy, a traitor, and a woman who had betrayed him. It didn’t make sense. 

That afternoon, feeling suffocated from this internal conflict, Sylus decided to leave you in the care of Luke and Kieran while he went to Linkon. He knew he needed space to grapple with the feelings that were driving him to care for you in the first place.

He needed to see the real woman he should be caring for. 

Because you had not only exposed intel on Sylus and Onychinus to the Hunter’s Association, you also asked for them to isolate Diana so she would have no way to see or contact him. Who knew that mere feelings of jealousy would spark you to do such trivial things? 

Frankly, you were insane. You were dark and twisted like him. 

But in a way, it only underscored how similarly deranged the two of you were. Perhaps, in your madness, there was a strange compatibility—one that Sylus found unsettlingly fitting. The suggestion of you two being more a suitable pair than he and Diana gave him an unease that he couldn’t simply shake away. 

It should be her. Her. Just her and her alone. He dedicated his whole life into finding her, yet you came into his life to ruin the foundations he had built to meet the person he was supposedly destined for. He had repeated it over and over in his mind like a broken record—the voices in his head telling him to let you go, to hurt you, to make you suffer. 

However, as he stood across the pedestrian crossing, watching Diana from afar, a realization hit him like a cold gust of wind. There she was, oblivious to his presence on the other side, but the spark that once ignited in his heart whenever he saw her was gone. Now, his pulse remained steady and his heart stayed still.

With a wary glance around, mindful of any watchful eyes, he decided to pick up his phone and ring hers. It was a good thing he was able to seamlessly blend into the crowd, with his practiced nonchalance making him invisible among the throng of people. After all, he was Sylus Qin, the mastermind of Onychinus—disguise was second nature to him.

“Sylus?” Her voice came through the line, tentative and filled with a mix of emotions as she scanned the faces on the other side of the crossing.

“According to the conditions set by the Hunter’s Association, we shouldn’t be meeting again.” His voice was steady, almost detached, as he kept the phone pressed to his ear. “Or if not, you will be marked as a Tenebra.” 

Her eyes eventually found him amidst the walking crowd, keeping an expression on her face that showed both longing and forlornness. “Not the first time someone has been marked a Tenebra because of you,” she managed to slip in a snarky remark in her worried expression. “Are you hurt? Did they hurt you?” 

“Are you worried about me?” he nonchalantly asked, watching as she stepped off the curb when the light turned green. Each step was a step closer to him, but nothing changed the pace of his own heartbeat like it should have. Nothing stirred within him as it once did.

“You have the audacity to use a phone when you’re right in front of me,” she snapped, frustration flaring as she yanked the phone from his grasp. Without hesitation, she grabbed his arm, dragging him along with her to escape the dangers of being seen in public. They ended up in an alleyway, a place hidden from prying eyes, an irony that made Sylus chuckle under his breath. The alleyway. Why has that become such a memorable place to him? “Sylus, what’s so funny? I was so scared something happened to you! You couldn’t even call me back or text me the past few days?”

He remained expressionless as he observed her outburst. Strange. In her frantic worry, she reminded him of you, and it was a discomfiting parallel that sent chills down his spine. “I said I’d need to disappear from your life completely, so I have to tie up loose ends,” he began, each word seemingly a dagger to her heart. “We haven’t been able to resonate either way, sweetie. There’s no reason for us to keep meeting.” 

“No!” she adamantly denied the thought, pulling him into an embrace. “No, you’re not allowed to disappear just like that! We need to find a way to get—”

“It’s a dangerous gamble to be caught in my world,” he said in a low voice. 

But she was stubborn. “I’m already caught in it! So, please, Sylus, take me with you. Take me to the N109 Zone or wherever you’re hiding. I want to be where you are.” And in spite, she uttered words that made Sylus think twice about his perception of you. “It’s her fault that this is all happening. She’s a traitor to you and to the Association. Her loyalty isn’t with anyone but herself, Sylus. She’s the one who needs to disappear!”

~~

Back at his hideout, Sylus was careful to ensure that Diana remained oblivious to your presence in another room. He was already grappling with how to manage the situation—torn between the woman he loved and the woman he had wronged who, ironically, were both now under the same roof. The thought of you two crossing paths was a nightmare he didn’t want to deal with, so he gave strict orders to the twins, notorious for their loose lips and loud mouths, to keep Diana far from you.

Because when Sylus returned to your room, he knew you were awake. The dark classical music playing from the vinyl record had likely stirred you from unconsciousness. It had been nearly a week since the crash, but thanks to his meticulous care, your wounds had mostly healed, leaving only faint scars behind.

“You can’t hide from me forever.” Sylus hovered over you to whisper into your ear, summoning his protective black-red mist to slowly release you. “Wake up, kitten. We have unfinished business.” 

When you finally opened your eyes after what felt like an eternity, Sylus told himself it was natural to feel relieved, that it was only right for his heart to soften at the sight of you returning to consciousness. But as you awoke, the voices in his head—the damned, relentless voices—grew louder, mocking him, provoking him, and luring him into darker thoughts. His right eye began to glow like a flickering candle, and when he saw the fear on your face, the words that followed weren’t his own. They were driven by the unforgiving side of him he couldn’t control, a side that thrived on your terror. The beast that couldn’t be tamed. 

She’s a traitor.

Punish her. 

Hurt her. 

Devour her. 

While in a heated, dramatic exchange with you, Sylus was spewing words he didn’t mean. He was doing actions without regard. He was mocking your pain. Your jealousy. Your heartbreak. The drive to hurt you was strong in his head, but he fought desperately against it. The demon inside him that tried to consume his every thought. He tried to battle his own self just to protect you. 

“I betrayed you because of her!” 

His laughter died down, but the amusement in his eyes only deepened, replaced by the wicked smile on his face that enjoyed seeing you suffer. “It’s always been about her, hasn’t it? You see me with her, and you can’t stand it. It eats at you, makes you act out.”

You tried to move away, but Sylus pressed his foot firmly on your wrist. She betrayed you, Sylus. Punish her. 

“I’ve seen your struggle,” he continued, his voice soft but laced with corrupt satisfaction. “The way you watched me with her, the way it gnaws at you. It’s almost poetic, really.”

It wasn’t until you reached for the gun on his nightstand, pointing it at yourself, that Sylus snapped out of his dark trance. The horror in his eyes was a stark contrast to the sorrowful shine in yours as you stood there, sobbing in front of him. Each word you spoke was tailed with the pain of a heart shattered by everything he had done and said. 

“...All I wanted was your love,” you choked out with tears cascading down your face, “I j-just wanted you to love me. I turned my back on the H.A. for you. I left all my friends and family for you.” Your breathing was still for a moment, but your heart had already been blown into smithereens. “All I had was you. I loved you. I devoted all my body and soul into loving you, Sylus. Why c-can’t I have even a little bit in return?”

Even as his gaze softened and a flicker of regret passed across his face, you had already made your decision when your finger tightened on the trigger. The recoil jolted your wrist, but before the bullet could find its mark, Sylus’s hand shot out and expertly deflected your aim. Instead of ending your life, the bullet shattered a window, ricocheting off the glass and disappearing into the night.

“Are you out of your mind?!” Sylus roared, his voice a thunderous mix of fury and disbelief.

You were barely responding to him as he cupped your cheeks and forced your lachrymose eyes to lock into his crimson ones. It was as though you had already resigned yourself to reality, that ending your own life would have been a better option than being with the man you hopelessly loved. 

“Y/N,” Sylus tried to shake you awake, desperate for you to look into his eyes. “Y/N! Enough. Let’s end this game.” 

“...I was never playing one with you.”

Sylus was overwhelmed by a profound, indescribable pain that pierced his chest. It was a pain that mirrored yours but was infinitely more intense. “I warned you many times before to never fall in love with me,” he said in a low, softened voice, “It’s for the best, and it’s what will keep you safe. Why don’t you listen?” He longed to pull you into his arms, but the crushing reality was that he only now realized how deeply he cared for you. It was devastating that his awakening had come at the cost of your near-suicide, forced by a love he was unable to return.

Was it truly too late for him to come to terms with his feelings for you? Was it too late to accept that he had fallen in love with you rather than the woman he believed he was meant to be with?

His answer came in the form of a gut-wrenching realization. It manifested in the frantic voice of Diana—the woman he believed he loved, piercing through the haze of his thoughts by yelling, “Sylus, step back!”

“No!” he shouted, his black-red mist swirling to intercept the bullet.

But his efforts came too late. The bullet had already been set in motion, and it tore through the side of your head. 

It penetrated your skull with a cruel precision, not just once but twice. And the warmth of your blood seeped through his fingers as he caught your head before you fell onto the floor. 

Sylus’s mind raced with the enormity of what had just happened. His face grew ashen as he looked at your bloodied head and lifeless eyes, a wave of acid welling up his chest until he couldn’t breath. But the reason for his suffocation was because of his own guilt and grief. It was at the force of a sledgehammer when he was hit with the admission that he had always been in love with you. All along, despite your tangled mess, it was you who had captured his heart in this world.

His chest tightened, his breaths coming in ragged, broken bursts, while he held you close in his arms. And your last three words, your very last words of “I… love… you…” as you stared despairingly at him was icing on this bitter cake. 

No… no! 

He couldn’t fucking accept it. He was losing his mind, he was going insane. He was plunging into madness. Utter hysteria. “Y/N, please,” he begged, his voice breaking as your eyes, once full of life and light, were now glazed over with the sheen of death. “Don’t leave. No, I can’t let this happen!” For the first time in a long time, he once again felt hot tears leaving his eyes. It was an emotion so rare it only ever showed toward the people he deeply cared about. “I love you too,” he struggled to say. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean what I said back there.”

Sylus held you close, disregarding the blood staining his clothes while he was consumed by agony and regret. He had driven you to this, pushed you away, and then drawn you back into his orbit only to lose you forever. 

Though he may have conquered your heart, in doing so, he had only destroyed the both of you. The memory of your love and the warmth of your touch would haunt him for the rest of his days. And as he held your lifeless body, he knew that he would never be whole again.

But it shouldn’t be too late. No, it shouldn’t! He didn’t know if it was the hysteria or adrenaline kicking into him, but he had thought of an idea—no matter how immoral—that would return you back to him. He just couldn’t weigh which strong emotion he had to deal with first; should he grab the gun and shoot Diana out of anger? Or should he ignore her presence entirely and just focus on you?

Sylus chose to proceed with the latter as he carried you through the corridors of the base, his steps heavy with guilt and his shirt drenched in blood as you remained unconscious in his arms. The hunter girl had followed him in his spiritless steps, her eyes wide with confusion over his anguish.

“Sylus, why are you doing this?!” she demanded, grabbing his arm to halt his progress. “She would’ve killed you. That girl’s a traitor!”

Although he stopped in his tracks, he couldn’t really return her gaze. His eyes could only look at your lifeless ones. “That girl you shot in the head,” he spoke low and in despair, “is my woman.” 

Diana was horrified. “But… but you never said—” Before she could finish, the twins intervened, holding her back from pursuing Sylus further. “What about me?”

He had already turned away. “I’ll fulfill my promise to protect you from afar, but this is where our paths part. Do not come near me again.”

~~

Sylus stood over your unconscious body, his eyes bloodshot and tears-streaked, while his heart pounded with a mix of grief and desperation. He had summoned Philip and the finest surgeons he knew to his hideout, where you lay in a medical bed, exposed and vulnerable, as if you were a subject in a desperate experiment.

Philip arrived with a grim expression, his eyes scanning the scene with both skepticism and professional detachment. Sylus could barely contain his desperation as he demanded, “Do everything you can to save her. Even if it means infusing a high-grade protocore in her brain.” After all, he had plenty of that. Sylus had all the resources, protocores of the highest grade, each with their own purpose and capabilities.

Yet Philip hesitated, his face contorting with concern. “Mr. Sylus, you know I can’t do this. She’s gone. The best thing to do is accept—”

That was when Sylus’s composure cracked. He kicked the nearby chair out of rage, tears streaming down his face as he begged, “You’ve done it before. Do it again! Please, I need her to live!”

The sight of Sylus, usually so imposing and dominant, breaking down in front of him was shocking. Philip felt a pang of sympathy toward the Onychinus boss who was willing to do everything for a woman who was already dead. His hands trembled as he spoke, “I-I can try. But I’m warning you, Mr. Sylus… even if she survives this, there’s zero chance her memories will be the same. They may even become altered, and it will be out of our control.”

Sylus’s gaze never left you. “I don’t mind. Just do it.”

~~

Weeks later, Sylus found himself in a secluded alleyway, meeting with a deepspace hunter who was also an enemy of his from another planet. Of course, the atmosphere was tense as both men stood in front of each other, eye-to-eye, carrying a defensive stance from one another. 

They were never friends. But that day, they weren’t enemies either. 

“How’s she?” Xavier broke the silence first. 

Sylus answered with a low voice. “She hasn’t woken up, but she’s stable.”

“Why’d you ask to meet?”

“I want you to look after her,” the Onychinus leader began, his voice steady but carrying an undertone of desperation, “Speak to the Association about taking Y/N back and forgiving her for her betrayal. In return, I’ll step away from Diana’s life. She’s all yours. I just want Y/N to return to her normal life.”

Xavier’s expression was serious. “You’re forgetting you still have a bounty on your head.”

“And you’re forgetting you and your backtrackers destroyed the planet where I was living,” he replied in equal disdain, but only enough to trap Xavier into a wall of guilt and obligation.

“I’ll see what I can do,” said Lumiere—or, in his current form, the deepspace hunter, Xavier. “The HIS will be easy to convince. But what if she wakes up and wants to go back to the N109 Zone?”

Sylus felt a tug of deep sadness pulling at his heart. “She won’t. Her memories of me are gone for good.” 

~~

If this was his karma for hurting you, then it was definitely the worst kind. 

Sylus maintained a distant watch over you after you returned to Linkon, observing from afar as you rejoined your life with the support of the Hunter’s Association and former colleagues. Each day, he sent Mephisto to monitor your whereabouts, carefully tracking your interactions and daily activities. The mechanical crow often returned with glimpses of your life, which Sylus scrutinized with intense focus as if he were watching a movie. Each glimpse offered him a sense of relief, happiness even, at knowing how easy you were settling back into your old life. 

You had been officially dismissed from the Hunter’s Association due to a medical condition that rendered you unfit for duty, but they continued to cover your pension and provided free lodging—likely thanks to Xavier’s persuasive influence over the Association. The official story was that you had been sent on a dangerous mission where a Wanderer had placed you in a life-threatening predicament. The narrative praised your honor and dedication to the end. There was no mention of Sylus, Onychinus, or the N109 Zone. No hint of the life you had once led or the truth behind your memory erasure. 

Yet, in a bitter twist of irony, perhaps the story you were told may not actually be farther from the truth.

After all, Sylus was the dangerous monster that sent you to that life-and-death situation.

But at least now, you were well cared for. So much so that Sylus fought to contain his jealousy whenever Mephisto’s eyes relayed visions of you sharing lunch with a physician named Dr. Zayne. He struggled to mask his irritation as he saw the man drape an arm around your shoulders while guiding you out of the hospital or wrapping a scarf around your neck to keep you warm. He would often even drive you home and send you gifts that were masked as tokens of “recovery.”

Bullshit.

Sylus clenched his fist, his thoughts of jealousy consuming him. My girl, he thought in despair, my beautiful girl is cherished by other men, while he remained imprisoned in the desolate shadows of the N109 Zone, longing for you.

Eventually, Sylus felt an overwhelming urge to see you in person. After discovering that you had taken a job at a café in Bloomshore District, he convinced himself that observing you from a distance wouldn’t cause harm. He just wanted to be near you, to ensure your safety, and to protect you from any potential threats.

As he sat on a nearby bench, Luke joined him with a comment. “Boss, you said we needed to disappear from her life.”

Kieran, taking a seat on Sylus’s other side, added, “Do you think she’d recognize us if we walked into that café? If she doesn’t, I’ll give her a hard time with my orders ‘til she remembers us!”

“Ha ha! Let’s do that!” 

“Boss, let’s go!” 

“Leave her be.” Sylus took a deep breath, adjusting his sunglasses and setting aside his newspaper—part of his disguise—as he watched you through the café window. He noticed the subtle traces of familiarity in your actions, but the connections that once bound you were now distant memories. “...I’m just here to make sure no one’s bothering her.”

The truth was, he wrestled with his emotions each time he visited the café you were working at. He wanted to approach you, to speak to you, but he hesitated each time because of the fear of rejection and the pain of seeing you not remember him holding him back. There were so many what-ifs in his head that it drove him insane to think about. 

Because if anything, what if you were already seeing someone else? What if you were already in a relationship with that scumbag doctor from the Akso Hospital? 

It was petty jealousy that drove Sylus into stepping into the café. And the first time your eyes met since you resurrected, his heart initially froze, then raced uncontrollably. His heart swelled with hope as you looked up at him, but it was quickly replaced by the lack of recognition in your eyes the moment you spoke from the counter. 

“Hi. What can I get you?” you asked, treating him no differently than any other customer. 

Sylus was caught off-guard, but he knew he had to play the part. “I, uh, I’ll get an Americano. Large.” 

“Alright, sir. And your name, please?” you asked, following your routine without any real interest in the man before you. 

But in a way, this was a relief for Sylus. It confirmed that the protocore embedded in your head was functioning as intended, and that any dark memories from the past had been completely erased, even if it meant he was no longer part of your life. 

“Skye,” he said with a soft smile. “That’s my name.”

~~

There wasn’t a single day Sylus missed visiting the café. 

At first, he worried that his constant presence might seem odd, or that you might think of him as a stalker. But as the days passed, seeing you became an essential part of his routine. A day without catching a glimpse of you felt incomplete, almost maddening. Seeing you was like a drug he couldn’t get enough of.

Initially, you found his regular visits a bit strange, but gradually, the small interactions between you two evolved. Sylus began to appear at the café just when you needed him most—whether it was fixing a broken coffee machine, addressing rude customers, or simply offering a helping hand. These acts of kindness somehow transformed your view of him. What started as a customer-service relationship slowly became more personable, and in recent days, you often greeted him warmly and smiled whenever he walked in. If only you knew how badly it warmed his heart that he got to do things for you without making him feel like he was intruding in your life.

And to be honest, Sylus even felt like he might be—as Luke termed it—foolishly ”crushing” on you. 

“Who knew our boss-man could be a hopeless romantic~?”

There was a time when he visited the café, only to find out from your manager that you called in sick from work. Sylus knew where you lived, but going to your place uninvited was a different story. He had to put some boundaries no matter how worried he was for you. But that was when Mephisto became useful; the mechanical crow would simply fly off to your place and observe you from outside. Then, an idea to drop a box of medicines and chocolates at your balcony was something he had thought of at the last minute. 

Back in the N109 Zone, Sylus anxiously looked at his crow. “Are you sure she didn’t see you?” 

“Caw! Caw!” 

“Did she eat the chocolates?” he asked, exhaling a deep breath he didn’t think he was holding.

“Caw! Caw! Caaaw!” Mephisto responded, fluttering its wings as if to reassure him.

~~

And then, that day happened. 

The day Sylus finally gathered the courage to ask you out, fate had other plans. And what began as a simple gesture to offer you a ride home during a stormy night quickly escalated into something far more intense.

Because one moment, he was offering you a ride. The next, he found himself in your bed, having the most passionate sex he had ever had with someone. He wasn’t even sure if he could call it that, because it felt more like he was making love to you, even if to you, he was probably just an attractive guy you unexpectedly hooked up with. 

So, he had to make himself known. He had to hear his real name leaving your lips. “Sylus,” he breathed into your ear, hands tracing your curves, “Call me Sylus, kitten.” 

That night, he was an insatiable man who could only be satisfied by his woman. 

When he was buried far too deep inside you, he enjoyed the sight of ecstasy on your face and lavished at the sounds of your titillating moans with his every thrust. Not only did he miss the feeling of your walls tightening around his shaft, he also remembered how badly you used to want him to cum inside you. 

And so, he did just that. At his climax, he released hot spurts of seed into your womb, fulfilling a wish from the past that he used to deprive you of. 

But as the night progressed and the heat of the moment faded, the conversation shifted to a more profound and emotional terrain. Sylus wrestled with the urge to reveal the truth about his true identity—every painful detail and the secrets he kept from you. Yet, he knew that doing so would only complicate matters further and risk causing you more pain. The idea of hurting you again, after such a meaningful connection, was unbearable to him, especially now that you were still fragile as glass, ready to shatter at any moment. 

“Why do I get the feeling that I was the one who experienced a one-sided love before?” 

“No, you were loved. You were very loved. There was no one else,” he pressed, forcing you to believe the narrative with his rueful eyes staring back at you. “I was the one who wasn’t worthy of you… But I’d like to try and win your heart again this time. If you allow it.” 

“Sylus… I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry for not recognizing you before. I just… I lost a chunk of my memories, and I don’t know if it’s been altered or what, but…” He caressed your back as you took a deep breath. “I’ll try to remember, okay?”

“Please don’t.” He shook his head, crestfallen as he thought of the past that was rightfully erased. “And there’s no need for apologies, sweetie. There wasn’t anything you did wrong.” 

~~

Your relationship with Sylus remained unclear since that night. And it seemed as though the roles had reversed—now he was the one left wondering where he stood in your life. Because on the surface, it did seem like you were willing to work on building a relationship with him again, but every encounter you two had were always physical rather than emotional. 

Sylus found himself at your apartment frequently, three or more times a week, engaging in intense, passionate encounters. He had lost track of how many times you two could do it in a single night, exploring every possible position, in every corner of your home. He had tried his hardest to make you feel like he was the only man who was more familiar with every inch of your body than anyone else. Yet, despite the physical closeness, he sensed that the emotional barriers between you remained intact.

No matter how deeply intertwined your bodies became, the walls around your heart remained firmly in place, and Sylus knew that there was a part of you he still couldn’t reach.

That, and the fact that he was still seeing you interact a little too closely with that doctor from Akso. 

It somehow didn’t surprise you when Sylus’s car showed up outside the hospital to pick you up, and you got on with a guarded look. 

“How’s it for my kitten today?” Sylus asked as he secured your seatbelt, his lips brushing against yours in a quick peck. “You didn’t mention you’d be at the hospital.”

You shifted uncomfortably, avoiding his gaze. “Oh, I just... didn’t think I needed to inform you of my whereabouts.”

Dammit. He knew you weren’t officially together, but it hurt more than he cared to admit. And it didn’t help that Sylus’s pride couldn’t naturally take it, so he probed more. “That doctor. He’s not your neurologist, is he? It seems a little inappropriate for him to always be around you like that.”

“Well, I’ve known Zayne for a long time,” you merely replied, eyes focused on the view outside rather than the driver of the car. “I’d also appreciate it if you'd be less territorial over me, Sylus. I know you said we have a history together, but I don’t remember a thing, so… I hope you won’t rush me.” 

The Sylus you knew back then would have been enraged. Who were you to order him around? Who were you to tell him what he should and shouldn’t do over someone he rightfully owned? But he was a changed man now, and it was all because of you. You were the beauty that tamed him into a powerless beast.

“I understand,” Sylus replied, swallowing his pride as his hands tightened around the steering wheel, focusing on the road ahead. “I apologize.”

He heard you sigh beside him, and a part of him wondered if it was out of sympathy. But before he could dwell on it, you spoke up, your tone more serious. “I was at the hospital today because I had a pregnancy scare.”

Sylus hit the brakes at the red light a bit too abruptly, his heart racing in excitement. “Are you?”

“No, thank God,” you breathed out in relief. “But... can you please stop doing it inside? I really don’t like it. It’s not smart for me to get pregnant by a man I barely know.”

His chest tightened in a way he couldn’t describe. The old you nearly begged him for a baby so he could be yours forever, but he was aware that this version of you right now was not the same. It never would be, and that was the price he had to pay for love. 

“I won’t do it again.” Once again, swallowing his pride. “I’m sorry.” 

You still invited him to sleep at your apartment that night, and your reason being to work on the memories of him you had lost. Time and time again did Sylus tell you it was better you didn’t remember them, but he could also understand your dilemma when you told him that you always felt like a piece of you was missing ever since that “accident”. 

“And this ugly scar on my temple,” you pointed it out, settling into your side of the bed. “What kind of Wanderer did I fight for me to get a traumatic brain injury?”

Sylus placed a tender kiss on your scar. “Perhaps it was a heartless monster more terrifying than a Wanderer.” 

Like me. 

“Oh, well.” You pulled the sheets over your body, suggesting you two would have no action tonight. “Good night, Sylus.” 

“...Sleep tight, kitten.” 

You didn’t need to worry, though, because he wouldn’t have touched you even if you had explicitly asked him to. After hearing your words that afternoon—about not wanting to get pregnant by him and asking him to stop being so territorial—Sylus felt the need to pull back and be more cautious in his actions toward you. Your words had cut deep, but he understood you were only protecting yourself from a man who was, essentially, still a stranger to you.

And despite the sting, he had promised himself that he would be patient for the only woman he cared about.

~~

However, that same night was a different story. 

No, it was actually way past midnight when Sylus woke up from an agonizing scream that pierced the silence of the night, chilling him to the bone. Instinctively, his hand reached out to the side of the bed where you should have been, but the sheets were cold and empty. And then panic gripped him, forcing him to leap out of bed, his mind racing with a single horrifying thought: the protocore.

He darted outside of your bedroom and deeper into your apartment space, his eyes scanning every shadow, every corner. The image of you, eyes wild and frenzied, ravaged by the effects of the protocore, haunted him.

What if it’s happening now? What if I lose her for good?

The horrifying thought of the protocore making you berserk like a wild Wanderer was always there.

His heart nearly stopped when he saw you on the kitchen floor, curled up, your body wracked with sobs. Relief washed over him to have found you, but it was fleeting, replaced by a deeper, more insidious fear. He tried to approach you cautiously, his voice soft as he placed his hands on your shoulders, “Sweetie, are you okay?”

You flinched at his touch, and when you turned to face him, the sight made his blood run cold. Your eyes, usually so warm, were now wide and filled with tears—tears of terror, of anger. And in your trembling hand, you held a knife, its blade gleaming in the low light as you pointed it directly at his throat.

“Don’t come any closer!” you cried, your voice breaking at every word. Sylus froze, his breath catching in his throat as your sudden hostility surprised him. The knife’s tip hovered dangerously close to his skin, but it wasn’t the threat of violence that shook him—it was the raw, unfiltered pain in your eyes.

“Kitten, let’s talk about it calmly.” His voice was laced with cautiousness. 

“Stop calling me that!” You swallowed hard, your grip on the knife tightening. “You! I had a nightmare... about you. But it felt real, like a memory. You were torturing me at your base, laughing... and then, you shot me in the head.”

Sylus’s heart dropped into his stomach at hearing your altered memory. He felt his soul tear apart at the edges as he stared into your tear-streaked face. “It was just a dream. It wasn’t real, kitten.”

But you weren’t listening. “But is it also not real? That you…” You uttered each word with a threatening voice, “are the boss of Onychinus?”

The question hit him like a physical blow. He opened his mouth to answer, but the words were stuck in his throat and refused to form. He was trapped. The situation felt like a dead end—he could deny that your dream was a real memory, but admitting he was the leader of Onychinus would only validate that lie.

His silence alone was an answer to you. And your expression crumbled into one of betrayal at that. “You lied to me! You’ve been lying to me this whole time. How am I supposed to believe anything you say now?”

The anger in your voice enforced the stillness of Sylus’s breath. He knew he had no saving grace from this situation, but still, he took a step closer, his hands raised in a placating gesture. “Y/N, I never wanted to hurt you—”

“Get out!” you screamed, the knife shaking in your hand. The sight of you so broken, so shattered, tore him apart. “Get the hell out of my sight! I don’t wanna see you ever again, you monster!”

But Sylus couldn’t leave—not like this, not when you were hurting because of him. So in his desperation, he lunged forward, grabbed your wrist, and forced the knife into his own chest. The sharp pain radiated through him as he plunged the blade in and stabbed himself repeatedly, his face twisted in agony, but not from the physical pain. This was nothing compared to the torment of knowing he was the source of your suffering. Again. 

“Even if I can’t die,” he choked out, his voice ragged as he tried to absorb the stinging ache in his chest, “I’ll take all of this pain away from you.”

His own blood soaked his fingers, staining your hands as he released his grip on the knife. It fell on the floor as he stepped back, his heart aching more than his wounds ever could, but those wounds easily healed. The pain of losing you again, on the other hand, would never heal.

He looked at you one last time, seeing his monstrous reflection from your frightened eyes, before turning away. Sylus walked out of the apartment with heavy steps, feeling his soul crushed from your antagonism. He knew he had lost you—perhaps forever—and the realization was more than he could bear.

~~

A haze of cigarette smoke and the clink of glasses filled the air of the bar. Sylus sat alone at the counter, his new glass of whiskey untouched as he stared blankly into the amber liquid. The sting of alcohol was nothing compared to the numbness that had settled in his heart after that agonizing night with you. Every swallow of the hard liquor was a desperate attempt to drown out the torment of recent events, but the pain lingered, and it was damn persistent and unforgiving.

As he poured himself another drink, the muffled sounds of conversation around him blended into a dull roar. That was until a familiar voice cut through the haze—someone he wished he hadn’t come across.

“Sylus?” 

He looked up, squinting against the dim light, to see Diana standing before him. He hadn’t seen him for the past year or so. And surely, her presence was unexpected, but he felt a sudden tinge of irritation at the sight of her. While her, she looked both apprehensive and determined, as if she had just made a hard decision to confront him. 

“H-How have you been?” she asked the question as a conversation starter, but Sylus could see the faint hint of unease in her eyes.

He then straightened up, and his posture became stiff and defensive. “I told you it’s not wise for us to cross paths,” he said curtly, his voice slurred from the alcohol but still holding a note of finality. He didn’t want to engage, not with her, not tonight.

On the one hand, Diana’s eyes flickered with an emotion he couldn’t quite place—regret, perhaps. “I… I wanted to say sorry for what happened with Y/N. I didn’t realize how much she meant to you. Xavier… told me everything. About you and her.”

The apology was genuine, but the mention of your name was a fresh wound, and he felt the anger and sadness surge again, bubbling beneath his carefully maintained exterior. He wanted to lash out, to blame her for everything, but he swallowed the words, knowing it wouldn’t change a thing. In the end, this was all his doing and he couldn’t point fingers over the mess that he alone had created.

Sylus tried to stand up, the room spinning slightly as he steadied himself. “I’m leaving.”

But Diana stepped closer, her hand reaching out as if to stop him. He simply brushed past her, his movements unsteady but undeniably distancing from her. The desire to remain composed was slipping away, replaced by the harsh reality he faced every day since you were taken from him.

He made his way to the exit, pushing through the bar’s heavy door with a forceful shove. Sylus’s next move was to lean against the wall outside as the cool winter breeze blew on his face. 

“Boss.” Kieran’s voice held a note of concern as he and his twin steadied Sylus by wrapping his arms around their shoulders. “We’ll take you home.”

Luke glanced at his brother with a sad glint in his eyes before leading Sylus toward the car. “Maybe it’s time to let her go, boss.”

~~

February nights were the coldest. And it was supposedly the day for lovers, too. 

Unlike the couples that littered the riverside, Sylus stood alone, his breath forming small clouds in the frigid air. His dark coat offered little protection against the biting wind, but he stayed committed, his gaze fixed on the empty expanse before him. Four hours had passed since he had sent you the message, and each minute he stood there waiting for you felt like an eternity. The biting cold gnawed at him, but he was determined to wait even if he’d end up getting frostbite. It was the least he could do.

The frozen river’s surface glistened with a thousand points of light as the moon cast its silver glow over the landscape. And for the next thirty minutes that passed, he was still alone. 

She won’t be coming, said the voice in his head. Give up. 

As he prepared to leave, the ache of disappointment settled in his chest, and his heart skipped a beat as he recognized you, standing cautiously across him, your eyes wide and filled with both curiosity and trepidation. The sight of you, despite waiting in the cold for hours, instantly warmed his freezing body. 

“Thank you for coming.” He took a deep breath, his voice trembling slightly as he spoke. “I won’t keep you long.” 

You maintained your distance, wary of his next move. “Why did you want to meet?” 

With a slow, deliberate motion, he began to peel the scarf from around your neck, and he felt a prick in his heart seeing you flinch. “I’m not gonna hurt you.”

He waited until you allowed him to proceed, his fingers brushing against your skin in a touch that was both gentle and reverent. You looked at him with confusion, the chilly air fought by the warmth of your breath. Sylus was just carefully replacing the scarf with the necklace he had given you long ago, the red Beryl crystal catching the light and sending soft, radiant glimmers into the night. 

Do you even recognize it? 

“I’m just returning a gift, kitten.”

As he fastened the clasp behind your neck, he pressed a tender kiss to the nape of your neck, his lips lingering for a moment before he straightened. That small gesture of his was actually carried by the depth of his affection and regret. And, if you may, it was his silent apology for all that he did to you.

“Sylus…” 

His red eyes shimmered, intensified by the bloodshot whites. Sylus stared at your face with a mixture of love and ruefulness clouding his expression. He was looking at you like you were the most precious thing in the world. And he struggled to hold back the tears that threatened to spill, with his voice breaking as he feathered the snowflakes that rested on your hair. “Take care of yourself. Always lock your doors at night and stay warm.” He took the scarf Zayne gave you, and pulled out a new one from his coat. It was a silly scarf with kitten prints all over it, that he soon carefully wrapped around your face and neck. “Wear that whenever you can.” 

Your own eyes were large and rimmed with tears as though you were also hurting inside. “Why are you saying this?” you asked, keeping the weakness inside. “You sound like you’re saying goodbye.” 

Sylus’s gaze was suddenly directed back to the river, but it was only because he had to avoid looking at your eyes or he would lose it. “The Association managed to track me here in Linkon and they’re still after me. I just managed to escape, but I can’t stay here,” he explained calmly, “I only came back to this city because of you… But now, I have to disappear, so don’t worry about having me around. I won’t bother you anymore.”

Your eyes widened in shock, and the tears that had been pooling your eyes finally spilled over. “Are you crazy?” you cried, seemingly unable to comprehend the words he was spewing. “You’re leaving me?”

Sylus’s heart broke at the sight of your tears, but he had to restrain any weakness by giving in. Instead, he reached out, and his hand trembled as he wiped a tear from your cheek. “I love you, Y/N.” He wanted to be the first one to say it this time. “Even if you regain all your memories of me—good or bad—I want you to know that I regret every pain I caused you. Even if you hate me, I’ll still love you. Today, tomorrow, and in our next lives.”

Sylus took one last, lingering look at you, his eyes filled with a sorrowful haze that nearly blinded his vision. He turned slowly, walking away from the river’s edge, with each step causing distance from the love he was leaving behind.

And you, you stood there, the necklace around your neck feeling heavy as you watched him disappear into the night. A surge of emotion overwhelmed you, and without thinking, you sprinted towards him. You took quick, long strides just to reach him, pulling him into a tight embrace, and crashing your lips against his in a bittersweet kiss.

Both of you cried as the kiss deepened, and you were encasing each other’s lips in a tight lock. The intensity of your emotions poured out in this poignant, intimate moment. And frankly, Sylus had never been this emotional. No one had ever seen this fragile side of him that he had always kept hidden. After all, what dominant, cruel boss of Onychinus would spill tears over a woman?

But they wouldn’t understand it. They never would. 

When you finally pulled away, your eyes were red and swollen from tears. “Be careful,” you sniffled, barely unable to catch the breath you needed for the next. “Keep in touch if you can. And when I’m ready, I’ll find you.”

Sylus’s eyes were also filled with tears, but he managed a forlorn smile as he nodded. He reached out to brush a strand of hair from your face, his touch gentle despite the heaviness of the moment. “I’ll wait,” he promised softly, his voice breaking slightly. “I’ll wait for you, no matter how long it takes.”

“Until we meet again.”

As he stepped back, the distance between you seemed impossibly vast, but the promise in your eyes and the love in his heart made the separation bearable, if only just. And when Sylus turned away, his heart was heavy but full of the hope that one day, you would find each other again. That one day, this distant love would become a cherished memory that you would look back on as you grow old and wrinkled, yet insurmountably happy and content with the life you had lived. With or without him.

PREVIOUS PART

[ode2rin]

US, AGAIN .ೃ

pairing. itoshi sae x gn!reader

genre. second chance (exes back to lovers!) | a bit of small town romance | a sprinkle of childhood friends to lovers (past) | angst with a happy ending 

content/warnings. 5.2k+ wc | characters are aged 25 in the present | pro-athlete!sae x coffee shop owner!reader | sae left for spain at 19 in here | mentions of sae’s vague past (especially the striker dream) | itoshi bros conflict never happened here let me be delusional | heavy in narration | minimal proofread

in which: itoshi sae returns to the only place on earth he vows to never set foot again.

💭 flashbacks are italicized and indented :>

Six years.

In those six long years of his absence, you couldn't deny that you rehearsed countless scenarios of encountering him upon his return. 

If by chance he still wanted to see you, or even look at you, you imagined giving him a small smile, a carefully crafted facade of composure, before gracefully walking away, as if life had moved on effortlessly for both of you.

That’s what you imagined. Just walk away, like how life went on for the both of you. 

But reality never seemed to align with your reveries. The sight of him wasn't remotely serene enough to prompt a composed exit. Seeing him made your throat tighten, and your heart danced in a rhythm only he could create.

Six damn years had passed since you last saw him on that balcony, and now, with him back in town, avoiding him seemed like the only right thing to do.

You don’t know how long he’ll be here, but it is now your life mission to avoid him at all cost. Today's encounter was just an unfortunate event—an inevitable twist of fate. Their house was literally right in front of your family's, making it hard to escape the nearness of the past.

“So, he’s back in town?” 

Hari's voice, your co-worker and now a dear friend, snapped you back from the reverie of yesterday's memories. The sound of her voice broke through the nostalgic haze, pulling you back to the present.

“What?”

“I asked if your childhood friend who is also a superstar slash professional athlete slash your only ex is back,” she mischievously asked, even miming quotation marks to emphasize each title she created.

You chuckled softly, shaking your head at her antics. Your gaze drifted to the freshly baked pastries, their delightful aroma greeting your senses like a warm embrace as you artfully displayed them on the shelves. The familiar scent of coffee and delightful confections used to calm you, but now it mingled with the storm of emotions inside.

“Yeah, it's basically the talk of the town. He's famous after all,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant and still focused on your work, using it as a shield to hide your vulnerability.

But in reality, the sight of him earlier had caught you off guard, and you had turned the other way to avoid him. Your heart was still racing from the almost encounter, and the comforting ambiance of your coffee shop provided little solace.

“Did he see you?”

“I pray to all saints that he didn’t,” you deadpanned, your facade of composure beginning to falter.

“What did he look like now?”

You hesitated, your mind flashing back to that fleeting glimpse of him earlier.

Far from what was once mine. “Good.”

“That’s it? Good?”

No. He looked gorgeous. He looked painfully gorgeous.

“What do you want me to say?” you countered, throwing a side glance to her persistence.

In that fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse of how much he had changed. He looked undeniably handsome, lean, and with a certain maturity that hadn't been there before.

He… looked different.

And that's good—for you and for him. It meant that life there treated him well, and it eased some of the lingering guilt you carried.

You and Hari fell into a consuming silence, your backs turned away from each other. Even with closed eyes, you sensed that she wanted to ask something. You didn't want to initiate the conversation, but this suffocating silence had to go.

As you stepped behind the counter, you were met with Hari's concerned eyes and a voice laden with hesitation. “What are you going to do then?” she carefully asked.

You pressed your lips together, momentarily at a loss for words.

So you did what you do best: mask hurting with laughter.

“Is there anything I should do?” you paused, the sound of your fake laughter ringing in your ears. “It's been years. We made a choice.”

But Hari wasn't ready to let the matter rest, and you don’t know how to tell her you’re close to calling it a day. “You made a choice for him,” she countered gently, her tone filled with empathy.

Stunned was an understatement. Caught off guard would be an apt description. But speechless was exactly how you felt.

That, you couldn't mask with anything.

So you did what you weren’t best at: admitting the truth.

“And I’ll do it again,” you whispered in return. It was faint, because it was more for you than more of a reply to her. 

You were both young, and half oblivious to what it would be like outside, where the world wasn’t painted in golden hues and the gentle waves were replaced by blaring cars.

You were both seventeen, young and living for the hope of it all.

But you lived for days like those – days where both of you just had to be kids still. No worries, no voices of what might come.

“Tell me about your dreams, Sae.” “Tch. You already know about it.”

You did. All of it, you knew. Since you were kids, no one knew him like you did. You were his lover and confidant. You knew about it, all too well and all too much.

“Come on!” you persisted, giving him an enthusiastic look. “The sky looks so pretty in this sunset, I want it to know about us.” The setting sun painted the sky in hues of pink and orange, casting a warm glow over the beach as you and Sae sat side by side in the sand. The sound of gentle waves caressed your ears, creating a serene backdrop for your beach date. He hesitated for a moment, looking out at the horizon. Then there it was, a glint of determination flashed in his usually reserved eyes. “To be the best striker in the world.” You couldn't help but be captivated by the sight. It was the first time you had seen such an unusual spark in his eyes. Sae's gaze was often cold and impersonal, but now it was as if stars were hanging in his eyes, reflecting the infinite possibilities of his dreams. Sae is handsome, mysteriously beautiful even. But this, nothing will beat how dreamy he looks when he speaks of his craft. You liked this look on him - so ambitious, so driven. It made your heart flutter with admiration. Seeing this glint in his eyes right now, you knew you wanted to do anything in your power to let it stay there.

And you did, you held on and held out. Until you turned nineteen, when you had let him go to the big cities where he rightfully belonged. 

You smiled, a genuine, heartwarming smile, and leaned in to press a tender kiss on his cheek. “I’m sure you will be the best.”

Maybe you bit off more than what you could chew, but in the end, you’d do it all over again. Because what you did, the choice you made – it was for the best.

You were both nineteen, young and eager to grasp the world's offerings with hopeful hands. 

But despite the certainty you tried to hold onto, there were nights when the memories tugged at your heartstrings like it did now. You knew it was the right choice, that you both needed to chase your dreams separately — especially his dreams. But it didn't erase the whispers of what-ifs that occasionally crept into your mind.

But life — life went on. Life never waits for anyone, anyway. And so, you worked diligently to craft a future that no longer had room for regrets.

But love leaves echoes, and his presence back in town stirred those dormant feelings. With him being in the same place, you felt like a stranger in your own town.

It was easier when he was thousands of miles away, an untouchable star on a different horizon. But now, with the universe conspiring to bring you close again, you couldn't help but feel like a wanderer in the galaxy of memories you built together.

After all, everything here in this town is about you and him. 

Six years.

Was it that long? He couldn’t really tell. Maybe time really does pass fast when your life is falling apart.

It has been six years since Sae has sat on the balcony of his childhood home. And like the sick bastard fate was, he’s welcomed by the sight of your horrified yet still so damn fucking beautiful face.

Perhaps the saints you prayed to didn’t hear any of your pleas, because despite calling out to each one, Sae saw you.

There you were, a flicker in the periphery of his vision, desperately trying to avoid him. He was trained to be very aware of his field of vision, so there was no way he wasn’t able to notice your frantic leaving and the hurried closing of your house’s door as you noticed him. 

He let you be, holding back the overwhelming desire to call out your name like he used to when both of you were running late to class. He let you be, because if you were to ask him, he wouldn’t know how to look you in the eye without a thousand words reflecting on his own. 

[Attention, everyone. This is the final boarding call for passengers of flight 924 to Madrid, Spain. Again, this is the final –] “Sae, you’re going to miss your flight. They’re not coming.” No. “They’re not coming, Sae. You have to get on the plane.” No. No. Shut up.

He needed you there, more than anyone. A thousand people could cheer and show up for Itoshi Sae, but his eyes will always search the crowd for just one — just yours.

Yet, alas, you were nowhere to be found. And so, that very same day, Sae vowed to never come back to this place.

He hated this town and you, he’s convinced.

Sae had always been indifferent to a lot of people, everyone knew that. But never in a hundred years would anyone who knew you both think you’d be on that list. And deep down, he didn’t want to believe it either – until that day you decided not to show up when you promised you would.

He wasn't stupid. He had an inkling of why you did what you did. Yet, irrationality overpowered reason, and all he wanted that day was to run the distance between the airport and your house – to see your face, to remind you that he had plans, plans for both of you.

When Sae’s manager informed him that he needed to come home for a while to renew his passport, it was as if all of his suppressed recollections of this place – of you, came pouring out to his soul all at once.

Every street, every corner, every memory — they all threatened to consume him. His family, Rin, this town, and you – you were all the things he left behind for the dream.

Dream. Best Striker in the world. What did it even mean? Long ago, he thought he knew.

But it had to work. Everything had to work. He lost you for this dream. And if he loses it too, then what does that make him? A sore failure. And Sae was never known to be admissible to failing.

Whatever hell he encountered on the other side of the world, he swore he would never return home. Even when he was traversing across a path to ruin of being the person he thought he would be, he would never ever choose to come home.

Anywhere, but here. Anywhere, but home.

So there he was, the renowned glorious prodigy of japan. He was close to everything after countless mishaps. 

He’s getting closer and closer to the new dream yet getting farther and farther away from home.

Home. What does it even mean? Lately, he doesn’t even know. 

And after that day, no one ever mentioned your name to him. No one in his new world knew about you. No one knew how Itoshi Sae's world used to revolve around someone's soft smiles and easy eyes. 

He never asked anyone not to mention you; he wasn't one to ask, after all. But for some reason, no one dared to. Not even Rin. It was as if one mention of you in his presence was a carefully crafted brick used to make his castles crumble to the ground.

He hated that, but maybe they were right. Because with just a second's worth of a glimpse of you from earlier, Sae indeed felt his castles crumbling, piece by piece.

He hates you, for making his resolve crumble. For being the one person who can make his vow to never look back fall apart.

He hates you, because everything in this forsaken place is about you and him. Memories of your shared youth are etched into the very walls and streets, haunting him like ghosts of a past he can't escape.

He hates you, for not trusting you two would work it out somehow, and for giving up before the game even began.

He hates you, because it was easier that way. Easier to pretend he didn't care, that you didn't matter, and that you were just another soul he knows a little too much of.

Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more, and yet he knows, only one of it was true – and that he hates you for making him convince himself that he does, just to cope with leaving half of his heart to the only place he vowed never to come back to.

It was a jinx to say that yesterday’s encounter was already an unfortunate event, because today, you literally learned a whole new degree of unfortunate and unlucky – by having Itoshi Sae as your first customer of the day. 

“Welcome! How may I help you toda— S-Sae.”

And to even top it off, today was Hari’s day off. It meant that you’re currently alone in the same confined four-cornered room with the person you swore you would avoid like it’s your life mission.

Damn it, Hari. Of all days. Her day off really had to be today.

Itoshi Sae, in the goddamn flesh, is standing in your place two meters away from you, yet you’re having a hard time feeling your feet on the ground and your heart beating so damn loud. 

He wasn’t looking at you (thank god), and had his eyes exploring the place with a neutral expression playing on his face. Suddenly, you feel like sixteen again back when he was looking at the first set of cookies you’ve ever baked and you were dying to hear what he thinks of your craft.

“It’s yours?”

You gulp. 

You gulped down the urge to tear up with how much his voice changed. You gulped down the urge to cry because he assumed you had your dream turn into reality too.

“Yeah,” you replied in whisper, your eyes following where he was looking, trying to avoid any chance it will meet his, “it’s not much but —”

“It’s beautiful.” Even before Sae could hear your meek comment of yourself, he cut you off.

You were always like that —downplaying your hard work, belittling yourself even before someone does. He hated that about you. 

He used to get mad at you for it, especially when someone made fun of you at school and you didn’t defend yourself. He always makes you cry whenever he points it out, so he stopped. Instead, he made it his role to rebuild your confidence. Sae wasn't known for being generous in compliments. It would probably take one hand to count all the instances that he genuinely called someone along the lines of not dumb, stupid, lukewarm. 

But it was never the case with you. With you, to say beautiful was always a second nature to Sae's tongue.

And he wasn’t lying though. Your coffee shop was really charmingly cozy, and so like you. It’s so much alike to what you used to tell him how you envisioned it would be. 

The coffee shop was a quaint haven nestled right at the edge of the sandy shore. Its exterior, adorned with weathered wooden panels and soft, warm hues, exuded a rustic charm that welcomed passersby with open arms. Sunlight spilled through large windows, casting gentle rays that danced upon the vintage, mosaic-tiled floor.

It’s beautiful, and it’s in front of our place. He wanted to say to you, but he stopped at beautiful not wanting to make things more awkward than it should.

The coffee shop, it’s right in front of the beach. It’s in front of that one spot you and him used to call ours. 

It’s the first thing he noticed before coming inside, and it made him wonder whether you knew or he’s the only one who remembers it even now.

Bashful, you uttered a silent thank you to his remark, “What would you like to order?” you followed up, trying to maintain composure despite your heart racing in your chest.

Noticing that he’s been too silent for someone who’s about to order something, you looked up to your menu, and immediately, you understood his silence. If one were to point out, it is too immediate for someone who’s almost strangers to each other.

“We have non-caffeinated drinks too,” you hurriedly said to him, your voice quivering slightly as you tried to break the spell of awkward silence.

He gulps, his eyes locked with yours in a moment that felt like eternity.

He can’t drink coffee, it ruins his body clock, and you knew that. You still know that.

It appears that he's not the only one who remembers, after all.

A thousand emotions danced in his eyes, each one a testament to the love that once blossomed between you. The coffee shop, once a quaint haven, now felt like a crucible of emotions, and the atmosphere was thick with unspoken words, heavy with the weight of what could have been.

Your breath caught in your throat, and you couldn't look away, despite the rush of memories and unspoken words flooding your mind. It was as if time had folded in on itself, and you were once again those young souls who found solace in each other's presence.

But this was different, much more complicated. The past was a turbulent sea, and even though you had both moved on with your lives, there was still a deep, lingering connection that couldn't be severed.

Yet, you knew better than to let those emotions take control. You made a choice, you have to stand by it.

You were no longer the naive teenagers who believed love could conquer all. Reality had taught you both harsh lessons, and the wounds of the past still lingered, threatening to reopen with each stolen glance.

“I’ll have your best seller of it then,” he finally broke the silence, his voice steady despite the tempest inside.

With a nod, you turned to prepare his order, your hands trying to steady themselves. You couldn't help but wonder if he noticed the tremor in your fingers or the way your heart seemed to echo in every beat.

As you handed him his drink, your fingertips brushed lightly against his hand, and for a brief moment, the world stood still.

He took the cup from you, and for a fleeting moment, you both lingered, almost as if neither of you wanted to let go. He could stay in this, playing pretend. Pretend none of it happened, pretend he never left, pretend it worked out in the end.

But he can’t, not when you stepped back first, breaking the contact between you and reminding him of the choice you made.

“Thank you,” he managed to say, his voice softer now, filled with a hint of something even he couldn't quite decipher.

“You’re welcome,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

And just like that, the moment passed, slipping through your fingers like sand. He turned to leave, and you watched him walk away, every step taking him farther from the life you once shared.

Perhaps, in some parallel universe, there existed a version of you who chose differently, who stayed intertwined with him in a tale of love that defied all odds. But here, in this reality, both of you were no longer who you used to be.

In this universe, you're just some two ghosts standing in the place of you and him, haunted by the memories of what once was while trying to remember what it feels to have a heartbeat.

After Sae’s visit yesterday, saying that you weren’t doing fine would be a gross understatement. 

Your emotions were all over the place, and you couldn't seem to find a stable ground for your thoughts. It didn't help when your parents casually mentioned that he was leaving town later today. Apparently, Mrs. Itoshi had a little gossip session with the neighbors, unknowingly revealing a piece of her oldest son's business.

He’s leaving, and that's good—for you and for him.

As you stood behind the counter of the coffee shop, you absentmindedly glanced out the window, your eyes drawn to the beach. The sight of the shore brought back a flood of memories.

Maybe in another life, the two of you could still dance along the sandy shore, playfully splashing water at each other. He would chase after you, catching hold of your waist as he sweeps you off your feet. And perhaps, just perhaps, you would have the chance to embrace him tightly once again, with your arms wrapped around his neck while you share a kiss as greedy and fiery as the sea’s yearning for the moon.

And maybe, in another life, your story wouldn’t end with both of you being strangers who know a little too much about each other.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn't notice the tears streaming down your cheeks until Hari whispered, “Y/N... you're crying.”

“Oh, I am,” you admitted, trying to regain your composure.

Your heart lurched as you tried to suppress the tears, but they kept flowing relentlessly. “Hari…” you whispered, shocked by your own emotional outpouring.

Hari's eyes reflected pity as she watched you, her voice soft and understanding. “Go,” she encouraged, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder, “Get your man. I'll take care of everything here.”

The words hit you like a lifeline, a spark of hope igniting within you. You quickly removed your apron and grabbed your keys, determined to catch him before it was too late. 

But before you could dash out, Hari's voice echoed through the shop, loud and clear, “Go! Be happy! And for the love of god, no more sacrifices as a love language!”

With one last glance at her and your coffee shop, you rushed out the door.

The airport seemed like a maze of bustling strangers as you frantically searched for the departure gates. Every passing second felt like an eternity, the fear of missing him consuming you.

Desperation and determination fueled your steps as you approached the flight attendant, your voice trembling, “Flight to Spain — I need to know about the flight to Spain for today.”

The attendant looked at you with sympathy, “I'm sorry, but all flights to Spain have already left. The last one left twenty minutes ago.”

Your heart sank, but you couldn't give up that easily. “Can you check again? Please. I-I need to see him. Please.”

The attendant double-checked, but the outcome remained unchanged. 

Twenty damn minutes. You lost him in just that short amount of time.

Your heart shattered as you realized you had missed your chance. The desperation in your eyes was evident as you felt your world crumbling around you.

In the midst of the bustling airport, you allowed yourself to grieve for what could have been and for the chances you never took.

Six years ago, you were supposed to be here. And maybe if you did, you wouldn't find yourself six years after, wishing you did things differently.

The drive back felt like the longest journey of your life. 

The sinking sun painted the sky with hues of orange and pink as you approached the familiar place. As you got closer, you noticed that the shop was already closed, and you assumed Hari had taken care of everything. 

But what caught you off guard was the sight of Sae standing there, in front of your place, with a suitcase by his side, as if he were meant to be on a flight rather than standing there.

“You're here,” you whispered, your heart pounding in your chest as you got closer.

“I’m here.”

“Why didn't you leave?” you asked.

Because I’m done convincing myself that I hate you, Sae hesitated to say.  “Why did you go to the airport?” he countered instead, avoiding your question.

Because I’m done telling myself that I did the right thing. 

There were so many things you wanted to say, but the words were caught in your throat. You bit your lip, not ready to answer his question just yet.

Impatient and desperate, Sae took his chances to ask you the only question that mattered to him at this point, “Tell me you don't love me anymore. I will go. I will do as you please. I just need to hear it from you.”

Your eyes widened at his sudden question, but Sae wasn’t done yet. “Answer me. It’s a yes or no question.”

Lost in a whirlwind of emotions, you couldn't hold back the torrent of words that poured from your heart.

“A yes or no question, you say? Every night, I think of you.”

With each word, your voice wavered, and you couldn't help but express the worries that had plagued you during his absence.

“Were you eating properly? Does the food there suit your liking? You’re a bit picky. Is it too hot there? Were you taking your supplements? Were you being hard on yourself again? Is... is there someone new? There must be, right?”

As the words left your lips, you realized just how much you had been consumed by thoughts of him, wondering about every aspect of his life, even when he was miles away from you.

His reaction to you holding forth seemed to intensify at your last question, but right now, you weren’t ready to listen to him. He needs to listen to you.

“Every single night of the past six years, I yearned for you. I yearned to have you close. I yearned to hold your face just once more. And fuck, I would’ve traded all my tomorrows for just one yesterday with you.”

With those words, the floodgates of emotion burst open, and tears streamed down your cheeks. 

Fuck, six years. For six years, you held on and held out. Would it have been easier if both of you had tried, and along the way, lost? Would it have alleviated the pain of what-ifs and what could have been's if you had bargained, if you had gambled? Or would it all have led you right back to this moment, grappling with the same heartache and uncertainty?

Finally, meeting his eyes, you saw a reflection of your own emotions in his. But you weren’t done yet.

“And you dare ask me if I love you. Well, does that answer your fucking question, Itoshi?”

“Then, don’t cross it out. Don’t ever cross it out again.”

Cross what…out?

“I saw your letter,” Sae admitted, causing a momentary confusion to wash over you. 

My letter… Bewildered, you couldn't form the right words, and he took it as a sign to continue, and to close the distance between you to hold your hands.

“Tell me, how could I leave after reading that, knowing the only soul who truly knew me was here? You own me, Y/N.”

“I told you countless times before, you own me,” Sae reaffirmed, his grip on your hand tightening as he drew it closer to his lips, planting tender kisses upon your skin. 

“There was no one,” he continued, his words carrying a sense of reassurance. “And there's no other warmth comparable to yours that I'd ever let myself bask in. And if there's any, I'd be only fooling myself, pretending it was you instead.”

Sae's voice grew softer, yet resolute. “You own me, even when I'm on the other side of the world. You own me, Y/N. Even in the distance that separated us, even in the years that you claim I'm not."

He stepped closer, his eyes locked with yours, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. “No place can ever own me as much as you do. So, don't ever cross your I love you's to me. I want them – all. I don't want your sorry's.”

“But I’m sorry,” you whispered, for the last time. But Sae gently wiped away your tears.

“It's ‘I love you’ from now on.”

For a moment, you both stayed like that, trying to make up for the lost time. Sae, much like you, dreamed of the day he gets to hold you close once again. He dreamed of a day he gets to watch the sunset from the reflection of your eyes again.

Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more reasons why he shouldn't be standing here, and yet he knew, only one of it was true – and that he hated himself for convincing himself that he shouldn't be here – to you, in his hometown.

Sae may have vowed to never come back to this place, but it was always a lie, because for all he knew, it's the only place he truly belonged. Half of his heart was left here, with you.

“Come on,” Sae said, and you followed him, curiosity in your eyes.

“Where are we going?”

“There,” Sae pointed to the beach, your spot, specifically. “To our place. The sky looks pretty, and I want it to know about us, again.”

“Us... again?” you asked hesitantly.

“If you would take me back.” Sae answered, a hint of fear in his eyes, afraid that he might be assuming this second chance for the two of you.

You took his hand in response, and squeezed it three times. “I want nothing more than to be with you, again.”

Without any more words, Sae gently cupped your cheeks, his touch sending shivers down your spine. The touch of his fingers was both familiar and new.

In the fading light of the day, his eyes bore into yours with an intensity that made your heart race. The anticipation hung heavy in the air as you leaned closer to each other, your breath hitched as his warm breath mingled with yours.

His lips were soft against yours, and as they moved with a tenderness that mirrored the way he held you, it was as if he was trying to convey everything he had ever wanted to say to you in that one, passionate moment.

The kiss deepened, and you could feel the intensity of his emotions pouring into it. It was a kiss that spoke of all the words left unsaid, of all the nights spent missing each other, and of all the dreams of a future together.

Feeling the tears streaming down your cheeks, Sae pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. And in that moment, he knew that he was exactly where he was meant to be – here.

To you, in his hometown. 

💭 thank you for the request saetorinrin! (i owe you a lot for your patience i guess..)

note. hi. if you’ve been here before, you might know that i hate this trope with a burning passion, i just can’t write it for the life of me. i started this in may (and only had the guts to finish it this month lmao), i was so tempted to delete everything and start from scratch (for the nth time) but i think i owe it to myself to retain most of what i wrote when i was stranded on an island xd this isn’t my best, that, i know for sure. but i hope you’ll still like it ! 

💌 if you reached this part, and you want to know about reader’s letter that sae’s was referencing, here it is. you may or may not read this, it won’t really matter. but if you want to, click until the end :>

💭 back to: milestone event

[munsonslove]

Making Deals

(18+ only)

(part 2) •  (part 3)

summary: Your friendship with Eddie has always been give and take. He drives you somewhere so you make out with him, he pays for lunch so you let him give you a hickey. It had always been over the clothes, until one day he decided to up the ante.

wordcount: 3.4k

tags/warnings: fem!sub!reader, softdom!perv!eddie, friends to lovers, smut, praise kink (good girl), degradation (use of slut & whore), use of pet names (princess, baby, sweetheart), thigh riding, no use of y/n

a/n: this might be a little rushed cause i really wanted to get this out tonight, specifically so that i could say that it’s my BIRTHDAY which means you legally have to say nice things to me. anyway i’m gonna go get drunk with friends now, enjoy!

Most of your friends assume you two are fucking. It’s understandable, given how Eddie speaks to you. Every conversation is an opportunity for innuendo. The two of you live inside your own little world, and what the people outside of that bubble don’t know is that it’s all a game. Every sly comment, wink, brush of the hand, and “trade off” is him daring you to give in. And although he definitely already knows the effect he has on you, if you were to admit how much you want him it would be forfeiting. So your friendship became a game of cat and mouse, always one-upping each other, always teetering on the edge of something more but never really crossing that line.

No one would believe that you and Eddie were just friends if they knew about what went on behind closed doors. Your friendship had accidentally become a series of give and take. Every time you want something from him- be it free drugs, borrowing something, a ride, a favor, etc.- he would request something in return. That ‘something’ is more often than not perverted. In the beginning, he would ask for innocent things, like kisses on cheeks or hugs, but since growing older (and hornier) his requests became much more debauched. Chaste pecks turned into timed make out sessions, or giving you a hickey, or starting a collection of your bras. One time he even wanted to spit in your mouth, and the memory of feeling his saliva violently hit the back of your throat as he stood towering over you still haunts you in the middle of the night when your hand is between your thighs. You started asking for things from Eddie that you didn’t even really want, all for the sole purpose of having an excuse to do something lewd with him.

That’s how you found yourself here, in the living room of Eddie’s trailer, holding up some random tape you took from his bedroom that you didn’t even read the name of, bargaining about what you’ll have to do to borrow it for the weekend. You expected the basic ‘make out with me for twenty minutes’ or ‘let me feel you up over your shirt’, but to your surprise, he took it a step further this time.

“You want me to do what?” you exclaimed, not believing what you heard.

“Show me your tits,” he says with a wave of his hand, like this was a completely normal request, as if he did nothing more than ask you to pass him a plate during dinner.

Sure, you had done a lot of sexual things with him in the past, but it all included having your clothes still on. Just the thought of disrobing yourself in front of Eddie had your mouth watering.

“Are you serious?” you ask, trying as best as you can to keep your face neutral and not betray how turned on the mere suggestion had you.

“As a heart attack,” he answered.

“That’s pretty expensive, just for a little tape,” you counter. “That’s like… ‘I want to borrow the van’ prices.”

He shrugs. “Well, the market’s changing sweetheart. Costs are going up.”

Feigning boldness, you drop the tape onto the couch and cross your arms in front of your torso before untucking your oversized t-shirt from your skirt and lifting it over your head, tossing onto him. It lands covering his head, and he quickly scrambles to remove the garment, not wanting to miss a second of the show. Underneath was a light blue cotton sports bra. It wasn’t the sexiest, but that didn’t stop the boy in front of you from wolf-whistling, bringing a light blush to your cheeks. Taking one final deep breath for confidence, you pull the remaining fabric off of you.

Holding the bra in one hand, now bare from the waist up, you bend over to pick back up the tape and smirk when you notice Eddie’s awestruck gaze locked onto your naked chest. Slipping the cassette into your bag hanging from the door handle, you move to redress yourself, but are abruptly stopped.

“Wait!” Eddie calls out frantically.

“A deals a deal,” you complain while rolling your eyes. “You had your show, feel lucky I actually took my top off instead of doing a quick little flash.”

“What do you want for me to touch them?” he asks, completely ignoring your previous statement.

This takes you completely by surprise. “Wh- what?” you stutter out.

He’d never initiated before, it was always you asking for a favor and him telling you what he wanted. On top of that, he always had a nonchalant air about him when he made these deals, like he couldn’t care less whether or not you let him bruise up your neck with his teeth. This eagerness wasn’t just rare, it was unheard of. And you feel a sense of pride when you wonder if this meant you had finally had the upper hand, at least for tonight.

“You heard me,” he responds, his eyes never leaving your body. He sticks out his tongue to wet his lips, and the action has you suddenly forgetting all about your want to be in control. “Whatever it is, name your price.”

“Um…” you start, thinking through all the possibilities. Truthfully, there wasn’t much more you wanted from your friend other than for him to mercilessly ravish you, but you couldn’t very well tell him that while remaining indifferent. So instead, you rake your brain trying to come up with anything that would seem like a semi-fair trade. “You have to be available to give me rides at any time for the rest of the week. And,” you interject, pointing your finger in his face directly between his eyes, “You have to let me play my music. Whatever I want, no complaining.”

“Mhm, for sure,” he mumbles, still distracted by your partial nudity. The fact he didn’t raise his brows and make a comment about how he’ll ‘give you a ride anytime you want, princess’ lets you know just how in deep he truly is. You suspect he would have agreed to anything.

“Ten minutes,” you add, as this was usually the point in which you two would work out the specifics of the deal. How long, what was off limits, that kind of thing.

“Thirty minutes,” he negotiates.

You’d let him feel you up for hours, if you were being honest with yourself. Imagining his calloused fingertips gliding against the soft supple flesh of your chest makes your thighs involuntarily squeeze together, but you refuse to let how desperate you are for him show. “Twenty,” you supply, and he seems pleased enough with this compromise.

He forgoes answering you aloud, and instead nods his head rapidly while raising his hands into the air and making grabby motions like a child. Stifling your laugh, you glance behind you to the wall clock and take note of the time.

“Okay, it’s 6:15 now,” you begin, “So when the big hand’s on the seven, your time is up.”

“Yup, uh huh, got it,” he says.

You hesitate for a moment until he gestures you over to himself, and you square your shoulders before taking a seat on his lap. Your skirt flares out as you perch yourself on top of him, and your legs are puzzle-pieced together with one of his thighs in between the both of yours. His hands tickle your side as they slowly trail up your waist, before settling just under the fat of your breasts. Holding your breath, you brace yourself for him to make his next move, and swallow a moan when his nails scratch up your skin, his fingers moving on either side of your nipples.

He massages your chest slowly, taking his time to savor the moment. After a while, his palms catch on your erect nipples, causing you to gasp, and his hands briefly lose contact so he can take them between his fingertips. He rubs the nubs between his thumb and index finger until you can no longer hold in any sounds and are a moaning mess.

“You like that, huh? You like me touching you like this?” he asks, though you can tell from his tone he doesn’t expect an answer. “God, you look good like this, tits out and sat on my lap. I can feel how warm you’re getting on my thigh, are you turned on baby?”

You ignore him. He already knows how wet he’s making you, so there’s no use in admitting it and making his head any bigger.

“Hey,” he whispers with a smirk, “For all the rules we like to come up with during our private time, we never actually said I could only touch you with my hands.”

Your eyes open and nearly bulge out of your head. “W- we didn’t?” The implications of his statement has your mind racing as your breathing stops in anticipation of his next moves.

“We didn’t,” he confirms, “and kissing is really just touching with your lips, wouldn’t you say?”

Taking your bottom lip between your teeth, you try your best to fake like you aren’t as affected as you are and feel his hands slip away from you as you shrug your shoulders stiffly. “I guess it is,” you mumble after swallowing down the saliva pooling in your mouth.

The gasp that escapes you when his pillowy lips first make contact with your perky nipple is impossible to resist. His masterful fingers stay massaging your left breast, while his mouth gives its full attention to your right. The gentle kitten licks he gives you just barely graze over the erect nub and you bite back a pathetic whine.

“E- Eds,” you breathe out with as much dignity as you can muster, “Don’t tease.”

“Aw, but you like it when I tease you,” he accuses, and you hate how much he’s right. “I can see it all over your face, I can see you squeezing your thighs together. Such a needy whore for me.��

You make a futile attempt to hide your embarrassment by covering your face, but Eddie is fast to pin your hands together behind your back, as if he knew what you were going to do before you did.

“Don’t hide yourself from me,” he orders, his voice full of dominance. “You look so beautiful right now, eyes all big, lips bitten. And fuck, such pretty tits,” he practically growls this last compliment. “I’m gonna mark ‘em up. You gonna let me, baby?”

His touch traveled back to your front after he pinned your hands behind your back, but you remained frozen. Your fingers found their way around your forearm and your nails dig into your skin as you gravelly moan out, “Yes.”

You yelp out as his teeth sink into your flesh. It wasn’t hard enough to break skin, but when he pulls off to give the same treatment on the opposite side you look down to see defined teeth marks on the top part of your breast, exactly where your cleavage would show in a low-cut shirt. You have a sneaking suspicion he did that on purpose. He bites you again, leaving a symmetrical mark, this time sucking the fat of your chest into his mouth a soothing over the sting with a lap of his tongue. Any pain you might have felt is overcome by pure lust, and although you know the bruises will be sore later you find yourself excited to feel that dull ache as a reminder.

“Fuck, princess, are you gonna cum?” he asks, his voice smug, “Go ahead, rub yourself on me, use me for what you need.”

Only when he says this do you realize you’re grinding on his thigh. Surprised by your own actions, you flinch back, and after looking down are humiliated to find that his pants have a dark patch of wetness where you sat. As you’re pushing away, scrambling to get off of him and apologize, he roughly grabs you by the waist and pulls you back to him, using his hold on you to rock you back and forth.

“And just where do you think you’re going? I didn’t say you could stop,” he laughs, “Times not up yet, babe.”

Glancing back up to the clock, you find the big hand hasn’t even reached the five, and you still have just over ten minutes to go.

“What’s wrong, afraid you won’t be able to hold it off? Afraid you’re gonna cum while riding my thigh like the good little slut you are?” he asks after you show your frustration by groaning. “Come on, I know you want it. Just let yourself have it.”

The worst part is that he’s right. But as much as you want nothing more than you finish while fucking yourself against thigh, you know he’ll be insufferable if you give in.

He starts to kiss up your collarbone. “Th- that’s not my chest! This definitely wasn’t a part of the deal!” you stutter out in protest, but he doesn’t let up even slightly.

You feel his lips stretch against the delicate skin of your neck as he smiles into you. “Funny,” whispers near your ear, “I don’t see you pulling away. You don’t want me to stop, do you princess?”

“No,” you answer truthfully without thinking, “But this wasn’t in the agreement!”

“Fuck the deal, fuck the agreement,” he curses out harshly, “You wanna cum, I know you do. You want to be my little slut. Let yourself feel good, princess.”

Any qualms you previously had about trying to hold onto any power had vanished without a trace. The only thing you could think of was how good it felt to grind your clit on his denim. Finally, you gave in and started humping his leg without restraint. You feel your climax rising in your belly, that tight coil ready to snap, when Eddie interrupts with a question you never expected to hear.

“What do you want for the panties you’re wearing?”

Your brain short circuits. “... Excuse me?”

“The underwear. That you have on right now,” he continues, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, “What do you want for them?”

Your hips pause in your confusion, but his grip on your waist forces you to keep moving against him, your clit rubbing on the rough fabric of his jeans so sinfully. “I- you- you want… what?” you stutter, trying to decipher if this moment is even really happening or is just a wet dream.

“I know you heard me, princess. I’m getting impatient,” he growls into the dip between your breasts before kissing back up your chest. “I’m going to make you cum, and I’m going to keep these panties. So what do you want for them?”

“Uh, I uh… um,” you search your brain but come up empty. “Fuck, Eds. Just make me cum and they’re yours.”

He chuckles softly into the crook of your neck and says, “My pleasure.”

He starts rocking with you, and you throw your head back as you feel his hard cock rutting against your own thigh. This only gives him better access to your throat, which he happily abused with his teeth and tongue.

“There you go, princess,” he murmurs to you. “So fucking pretty, getting yourself off on me. Sound so good. Show me how good girls cum.” As he’s talking, you get the sense that he’s speaking without really thinking, like this is just a stream of consciousness.

“Come on, baby” he pleads, “I need to see how pretty you are cumming on top of me. Don’t you wanna be good for me?”

“I do!” you call out, your movements growing frantic.

“I know you do. Keep rubbing that perfect little cunt on my leg. Get those panties nice and dirty for me. You wanna know what I’m gonna do with them?”

You’d like to tell him that you don’t want to know. That he can keep his twisted perversions to himself. But deep down, you want to know more than anything. “Wh- what are you going to do?”

“I’m gonna stuff them in my mouth while I jerk off,” he answers shamelessly. “Then, when I’m close, I’m gonna rub them on my dick til I cum right in the crotch. Then I’m gonna make you wear them when we’re around our friends, so you can feel the dry crust whenever you walk or shift, and you’ll know that you have a little bit of me right between your legs. Just like I know you so desperately crave.”

The picture he’s painting has you shuddering, and you feel your orgasm rushing toward you full speed. But, you still feel the need to act defiant. “And what if I don’t have any more ‘trade-off’s that I want to do? How are you gonna get me to wear them after you defile them?”

“Oh, you’re gonna do it,” he laughs again, this time more heartily, “Because you’re a fucking slut, and you want to be defiled by me.”

With this, he bites down where your neck meets your clavicle hard enough to bruise, and sucks sharply, clearly trying to leave a sizable and very much hard to conceal hickey. As you feel his wet, hot tongue flatten against your skin, you cry out in pleasure and spasm against him. Your orgasm is more intense than you would have guessed, given that he never actually made direct contact with your pussy. The waves of electricity rocket through you

With shaky legs, you brace yourself on his shoulders and stand up, your knees almost giving out when you try to put your full weight on them. He quickly reaches out for your waist to steady you and lend support, and you show your gratitude with a squeeze of your hand.

“You good?” he asks, and any trace of smugness you expected to hear in his voice is absent, substituted by pure adoration and care.

“Mhm,” you confirm with a hum, untrusting of your own voice to not break.

“You did so good. So good for me,” he says, so low you barely heard it. “You were so perfect. You are so perfect.”

And despite the fact that you didn’t think it’d be possible for more blood to flow to your face, you feel your cheeks warm with his compliments. With your hands still using his shoulders for balance, his hold on you loosens as they trail down past the hem of your skirt before traveling back up, lifting the garment until his fingertips meet the cotton of your panties.

“A deal’s a deal, right princess?” he asks, his voice unsure.

You nod and let go of him to take the bottom of your skirt, holding it up by your belly button. He hooks his fingers into the elastic of your underwear and starts to pull them down, but your arousal has the crotch clinging to your lips, and you turn your head in humiliation as you feel how he has to literally peel the fabric off of you. When you finally feel the cool air of the room on your hot center, you hear how Eddie breath gets stuck in his throat. He offers you support once more as you bend your knees and raise your leg, allowing him to slip his prize off of your body.

Now that they’re in his hands and you can see them fully, you realize just how much of a mess you made on him. The panties were completely soaked through, and the section of his pants around his thigh is stained darker with your wetness. However, his sizable hard-on making a tent in his jeans and straining against the zipper is enough to calm your worries.

He stands up next to you, and you side step to give him space. Your stomach flutters as you watch him lift the dirty panties to his face before inhaling deeply, and although this act is incredibly vulgar, you can't help the intense wave of arousal it brings to your already dripping cunt. You want nothing more than to just drop this game and be able to have him whenever you want, and even though you know he feels the same, your stubbornness is too severe. He tucks the dirty underwear into his back pocket and winks at you.

“Well,” he laughs, “I’m for sure looking forward to the next time you wanna borrow something, baby.”

[deliciousangelfestival]

Lovers Say Goodbye | 2 - B.Barnes

Character: soft!dark Bucky x ex-girlfriend!Reader

Summary: Bucky finds solace and love in an unexpected place, only to have his world shattered by a shocking revelation about the person he cared about.

Chap 1, Chap 2 , Chap 3 ,Chap 4, Chap 5 , -

Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Please let me know what your thoughts are. I'd love to hear your feedback. Thank you once again.

Main Masterlist || support: Ko-fi

A dangerous glint flickered in Bucky's eyes as he stared at your employee photo on the screen. "What if," he said, his voice barely a whisper, laced with a chilling intensity, "I stirred up a little trouble of my own? Got her attention the only way she understands?"

Steve furrowed his brow, confusion etching lines on his forehead. "So, you're saying you want to create some chaos to get her back?" he asked, his voice laced with concern.

Based on your sudden disappearance, Bucky could only conclude that you had already made your decision, that you weren't coming back. But messing with Bucky Barnes was a grave mistake. He had developed deep feelings for you, and now, he was determined to do whatever it took to see you again, even if it meant the world went up in flames.

"Is it worth the potential consequences?" Steve pressed, his voice heavy with worry. He knew the depths of Bucky's past, the darkness he could unleash when provoked.

Bucky's posture remained rigid, his jaw clenched tight. "For her?" he rasped, his voice firm, leaving no room for argument. "Without a doubt."

Steve swallowed hard, the weight of Bucky's unwavering resolve settling in his stomach. He knew his friend better than anyone, and when Bucky set his mind on something, he always got it. No matter the cost.

Bucky continued staring at your picture, a twisted smile on his lips. A silent promise hung heavy in the air, a promise that sent shivers down Steve's spine.

"Y/N," he murmured, his voice barely audible, "we'll meet again. One way or another."

***************************

The rhythmic click of high heels echoed down the long, sterile hallway. The cheerful facade of the friendly florist was gone, replaced by a steely resolve. Gone were the warm smiles that had charmed customers and Bucky alike; your expression had turned as cold and sharp as the winter wind.

The sun-kissed summer dress you once wore was a distant memory. In its place, a crisp white shirt and a severe black suit, the skirt hitting just below the knee, encased your form. Black high heels completed the transformation, adding an air of controlled power to every step.

As you entered the imposing exterior of the CIA building, you shed the remnants of your borrowed identity, "Alex Lynch." With each click of your heels on the polished marble floor, you stepped further away, leaving behind the carefully constructed charade and reclaiming your true self: Y/N L/N.

The elevator doors slid shut, sealing you within a metal cocoon. You pressed the button for the hidden floor, a destination accessible only to those with the highest clearance. As the elevator descended, the tension in the air thickened. When the doors finally opened, revealing the bustling operations center, a hush fell over the room.

"She's back?" A stunned murmur rippled through the ranks of agents. They couldn't believe their eyes. You, their elusive phantom, had returned after two grueling years embedded with the target: Bucky Barnes, the world's most notorious assassin.

Previous attempts to neutralize him had resulted in nothing but body bags. They'd taken a gamble, sending in their last hope, the agent renowned for overcoming impossible odds: You, with the code name of ODIN - Operational Deception and Intelligence Network.

The nervous click of Peter's heels echoed in the stark hallway as he approached you, "Ehm, Agent L/N," he stammered, barely daring to meet your gaze, "welcome back. Director Brandon is waiting for you." It was clear he was awestruck, speaking to his idol, the legendary ODIN.

You acknowledged him with a curt "Hmmph," your voice devoid of warmth. Reaching Director Brandon's office, you stopped. No knock. No announcement. Just a pregnant pause before the heavy oak door swung open with a silent by Peter.

Director Brandon, a man hardened by years of service, found himself instinctively straightening in his chair as your icy blue eyes met his. A tremor ran through his hand, a stark contrast to your unwavering demeanor. Even though he was considerably older, an aura of authority clung to you, making him feel like a student in the presence of a seasoned master.

"Y/N," he began, his voice strained under the weight of your presence. A fleeting smile, more of a grimace, played on his lips. "Welcome back. Splendid work, truly. We secured everything we needed thanks to you."

You didn't respond, your silence a weapon hanging heavy in the air, thicker than the unspoken questions and unspoken judgments. With a practiced grace devoid of human warmth, you lowered yourself into a chair, your posture rigid and unyielding, as if carved from granite.

The silence stretched, broken only by Brandon's nervous cough. "Anything you desire," he offered, the words tumbling out in a rush, his voice tinged with desperation. "Name it, and it's yours. A vacation. Anything to show our appreciation for your... sacrifice."

A single word, devoid of emotion, dripped from your lips: "Mission."

He leaned back, surprise momentarily cracking his carefully constructed facade. "But... wouldn't you like some time to... relax? After two years undercover, surely even Agent L/N needs a moment to reacclimate to the real world."

You tilted your head ever so slightly, a ghost of a smile playing on your lips. It was a smile devoid of warmth, bereft of amusement. "Tending to flowers for two years," you drawled, your voice like the whisper of an arctic wind, "has left me... unproductive. I require... stimulation."

A sigh escaped Brandon's lips, the weight of responsibility and the chilling efficiency of his top agent settling heavily on his shoulders. "Very well," he conceded, defeat lacing his voice. "I'll have the mission parameters ready shortly."

You offered a curt nod, the only acknowledgment he deemed worthy of his desperate plea.

He cleared his throat again, a nervous habit exacerbated by the intensity of your presence. "So," he ventured hesitantly, "no... regrets?"

Even though Brandon had been the one who sent you in, a sliver of unease gnawed at him as he regarded you. He couldn't shake the feeling of misplaced sympathy for Bucky, the notorious assassin you'd manipulated.

Your brow furrowed, a flicker of something akin to annoyance momentarily flickering in your eyes before being smothered by the practiced indifference that had become your second skin. "The success of the mission," you stated, your voice a monotone devoid of inflection, "is the only consideration that holds any relevance."

You rose from your chair, your movements smooth and practiced, your heels clicking like a death knell as you turned towards the door.

Without a single backward glance, you exited the office, leaving Brandon alone with the silence and the weight of his decision. He sank back into his chair, the image of your emotionless face etched in his memory.

Still, a sense of relief washed over him. Operation Pandora, a two-year-long covert operation, was finally over.

****************

A heavy sigh escaped Bucky's lips, a guttural "Huft," as he strained through another repetition. The training room, shrouded in darkness except for a single bare bulb illuminating the space, held memories he'd actively tried to suppress for the past two years.

Everywhere he looked, the ghosts of his past mocked him. Rows of gleaming weaponry hung on the wall, each instrument of death a stark reminder of the life he'd left behind.

Weight benches and punching bags stood like silent sentinels, their leather surfaces worn smooth from countless hours of his relentless pursuit of perfection.

He gripped the bar, his knuckles white with strain as he executed another hanging sit-up, the burn in his muscles a welcome distraction.

His gaze, however, remained fixed on the opposite wall, where a lone photograph served as a silent witness to his solitary workout. The image – a woman with warm eyes and a captivating smile – held the power to both soothe and ignite a storm of emotions within him.

Your fake name, Alex, echoed in his mind, a stark contrast to the cold reality of your true identity: Special Agent Y/N L/N.

"I'll get you," he whispered, his voice hoarse with a mix of determination and simmering anger. It wasn't just a vow of vengeance; it was a promise to himself, a pledge to reclaim the life stolen from him, to understand the woman behind the mask.

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Author Note:

My dear readers and followers,

Could you please share your opinions about this series with me?

If you enjoyed it, I'd love to hear why it appealed to you.

If not, I would greatly appreciate your feedback and advice on improving the series.

Thank you!

[aziraphales-library]

Hello beautiful people! First of all, thank you so much for this blog. Your work is amazing!

I'm looking for some fic suggestions, if you'd be so kind in answering. I loved Slow Show and Old Vines, so I wanted something similar, a long AU fic that has a lot of pinning and some angst, but has a happy ending. Thank you ❤

Hi! The fics you've mentioned are very popular in the fandom, so I'd recommend checking our #fandom favourites tag, as well as our #pining, #human au, and #long fic tags for more to enjoy. Here are more to add...

Between Comfort And Chaos by anathxmadevice (T)

“And how long have you two been a couple?” “Oh, I—” Aziraphale panics. “Ha, well, that’s a funny… We’re not actually—” “We’re just friends.” Crowley says, their voice clear and calm and lightly amused, either because of or in spite of Aziraphale’s flailing attempts to divert the conversation. “Ah, yes, quite.” Aziraphale says, then takes a sip of his drink just for something to do, instead of focussing on the way Crowley said just friends, and how it causes a painful throb in his chest that he has never fully got used to. His memory can only scrabble at the edge of a time where being just friends with Crowley didn’t feel like a particular form of torture. * Or, Aziraphale has been desperately in love with his best friend and housemate Crowley since they were students, but is too scared to do anything about it.

Keep it casual by Kiez21 (E)

Aziraphale has just been dumped by his boyfriend of thirteen years, right before turning thirty. While out with his friends, he meets a red-haired stranger that gives him one of the best nights of his life. Crowley's just moved into Tadfield looking for a fresh start. On his first night out, he invites a handsome stranger for a one night stand. It is just a one night stand, right?

The Anon Before Christmas by foolishlovers (M)

When Crowley’s friend, blogging buddy and business partner Anathema announces her annual Secret Santa Exchange on Tumblr, she is very adamant Crowley should join this year. The old-fashioned (but admittedly compassionate) man he gets assigned to send anonymous messages to every day until Christmas sounds awfully similar to the fussy bookseller that his friends adore, yet Crowley tries to avoid at all costs. But surely his friends would have mentioned if Aziraphale had taken an interest in the Bad Omens fandom as well… right? Or: An Enemies to Lovers Secret Santa Tumblr AU.

It never hurts to keep looking for sunshine by Dervila, elf_on_the_shelf (E)

After Adam's parents die in a car crash, Aziraphale is forced to start taking care of him as more than just an uncle. Don't get him wrong, he loves the little devil, it's just that he is completely clueless and could rather use some help. In comes Crowley, Adam's new nursery school teacher with his amazing skills in dealing with kids. Could he be the answer to all of Aziraphale's prayers - Adam-related and otherwise? Well, it looks like he might be just that, judging by the weird things Aziraphale's heart seems to be doing whenever he sets eyes on the man. Now, if only the tall ginger returned his feelings...

For His Eyes Only by AFrenchFanWriter (M)

Anthony J. Crowley has been an MI6 spy for 10 years, completing successful mission after successful mission under the guidance of his quartermaster, Aziraphale Fell. But this life is starting to take its toll on him as he is getting older; and when, one day, his past comes back to haunt him, Crowley realizes that it might be time for him to hang up his gun and face all the things he has left unaddressed… (Yep, it is basically a James Bond/Q AU!)

Driving in the Dark by Sarah_hadeschild (E)

Aziraphale, a small town librarian with a troubled past, has resigned himself to the impossibility of love. That is, until he meets a rough-around-the-edges motorcycle mechanic who reads Mary Oliver. TW for mentions of a past abusive relationship.

- Mod D

[ofstoriesandstardust]

austin (j.h.s.)

a/n: this is all for @cottagecori who made the mistake of asking me what i was putting jake through now

summary: A year after Jake washes out from the Navy, and almost fifteen after you’d seen him last, you re-meet him at a dive bar outside of Austin. Drunk, bruised, and alone, you find a shell of your former lover.

warnings: alcohol/intoxication, mentions of physical violence, references to Mav and Bradley dying, angsty, unedited, highly suggest you listen to austin by dasha

word count: 1.1k

You wince at the burn of alcohol sliding down your throat as you toss back the shot of cheap tequila. 

As much as you try, nothing will numb the pain of coming back to this town outside of Austin, wipe the memories of the people and the places you left behind here. 

One of the ghosts is seated across from you at the grimy table in this dive bar on the edge of town. 

The dim light in the joint doesn’t hide the bruises coloring Jake’s face, and the exhaustion he wears is not one you remember on the often smiling boy who’d kept you warm at night and brightened your days. 

“Are you getting into bar brawls again?” You ask softly, turning his face with your knuckle to get a better look at the cut on his lip. 

“Why’re you here?” He slurs. 

The man before you is drunk, far drunker than you’ve ever seen him before. You doubt he’ll remember this interaction come morning light, if think of it as nothing more than a hazy alcohol-induced dream. 

That thought is what makes you feel safe, being here next to him and asking questions you wouldn’t have otherwise. 

If Jake had been here sober, been coherent and able to give you real answers, you’d have gotten nowhere near him. 

Not after he’d left you, cold in and alone in that bed the two of you used to share. 

“Your anger has always been your fatal flaw.” You say with a sigh, turning back to your warming beer. 

“What’s it to you?” 

“You should know better by now Jake what it means to me.”

After what most would consider to be a perfect night, after whispered promises of a future and forever, after plans of marriage that would never escape the dark of night, Jake had left. 

“I washed out, okay?” Jake finally snaps after a few minutes of tension-filled silence. “Got two- two good men killed because I wasn’t enough when it really counted. Bet it makes you feel good, watching my demise after-” He hiccups. “After all I did to you.” 

You blink. 

You’d heard Jake’s dreams of joining the Navy as the two of you had always planned your escape from this town with parents and lives that confined you so. 

But that’s all they’d ever seemed to be to you: dreams. 

Jake never talked of bringing them to fruition, of going after what he wanted. 

It makes sense that he would leave you in the dust of his rearview mirror to go after what it was that he truly wanted. 

How long had he planned on leaving? How long had he known that he would say goodbye?

Finally, you sigh. 

The knowledge that Jake had failed in his dreams does little to assuage the sting at what it had all cost him. 

“No, Jake. It doesn’t make me feel good to hear that. I loved you.” 

“Past tense?” He hiccups. His eyes are glassy.

You sigh again, letting your arm rest on the grimy bar top. “Jake-”

“Because I didn’t stop loving you.” 

The admission makes you stop breathing for a moment, questions swirling in your chest. 

How long has Jake been like this? Days, weeks, months, years? How long had he sat in this town, getting drunk to forget and sleeping in drunk tanks and getting into bar brawls, all waiting and hoping for your return? 

How many years now had it been since you’d forced yourself to leave this boy in your past as he had left you? 

But the reality is the broken man sitting in front of you is not the man you loved.

That boy had been kind. Like golden rays of light. He’d been sweet and charming unlike any other. He whispered promises of forever under a warm blanket of security. That boy had gone line dancing with you, keeping you laughing all through the night. He’d been the kid who helped you your math homework while letting you help him with his English. 

This stranger in front of you is not the Jake you once knew.

This Jake has reached the precipice of no return, at a point only he can walk away from. This Jake is hardened by years of Navy service, details of which you’ll never know. This Jake is washed up, alone, drinking to ease the pain, only pennies to his name. This Jake lets others hurt him as a punishment he believes he deserves. This Jake is forever haunted by the ghosts of his past, living and dead. This Jake will live with what happened for evermore. 

“Come home.” He whispers. “It can be like it was. I’ll be good to you this time, I promise.”

His request makes you shudder. It would be so easy to let yourself fall back. 

You could be the one to get him sober. You could be the one to get him into therapy, to get his truck back. To get him in a park of cowboy boots and dance around like he used to. 

You could be his sunlight. 

But you know Jake will never fully forget what happened and you know Jake will never be the same. 

You could see that future now.

You’d plead and beg and scream for him to stay sober but he’d always fall back. He’d bleed your bank accounts dry. You’d wait on the front porch for him to return, only for him to never come home again. He’d find his way into an untimely death, crashing his car into the side of the road or letting some person beat him too far, leaving you in shambles once more. 

No amount of love you had for the boy Jake had once been will save the stranger in front of you. 

“I don’t deserve you, I know that. Just come back to me.”

The pleading in his voice is what breaks you. It’s what propels you while haunting all your dreams. 

“Goodbye Jake.” You whisper, slipping off the barstool.

His eyes fall, the sadness consuming them. You try not to think about it as you leave this place behind. 

Jake had left you behind once before. He would do it again. 

The truth was that Jake would never move past this moment right here. This rock bottom for him is all he would ever continue to be. 

Maybe Jake had no way forward, but you did. 

It was time for you to forget him. For good. 

“in 40 years you’ll still be here/drunk washed up in Austin”

[rhettabbotts]

for your celly my love!! <33

shielding the other one with their body

with rhett please!!!! protect me cowboy!!!!!! <33

the great protector - rhett abbott

pairing: rhett abbott x reader

summary: when a guy won’t leave you alone at the rodeo, rhett steps in as your ‘boyfriend’.

w/c: 1.6k

warnings: mentions of a creepy guy at the rodeo. exes to lovers, kind of? protective rhett. some fluff. use of female pronouns. i believe that is all.

The last place you wanted to be was the Amelia County fair.

You were visiting your family and your parents insisted on attending the last night of the county’s biggest event. It had been a few years since you had attended, leaving Wabang right after high school and not coming back until you graduated college. You had to get out, the stuffiness of the small town was suffocating you. It was hard leaving behind your parents, but it was somehow even harder leaving Rhett.

Rhett was your best friend growing up and your high school sweetheart, dating all four years during a troubling time in your life. Everyone thought you were going to get married, settle down and have a couple of kids. It became apparent that neither you nor Rhett were on that path. He didn’t want to leave Wabang, and you couldn’t wait to escape. It was an amicable break-up but that didn’t stop you from crying nearly every night those first couple of months away.

You hadn’t spoken in years, the only thing you ever heard about him was updates from your mother or the occasional Facebook post made by Cecilia. You knew he was chasing his dream of riding bulls. You had even seen a picture of him and Maria Olivares a couple years back. Nothing could have stopped the way your heart constricted and the bile to rise in the back of your throat. Come to find out from your best friend, they crashed and burned just mere months after dating.

So, by coming back home for a few weeks, you were taking a risk in seeing Rhett. You tried to be strategic about it; going into town at odd hours, avoiding The Handsome Gambler at all costs, keeping interactions short and sweet with Cecilia when you saw her at the grocery store. You never once asked about Rhett although the question sat heavy on your tongue.

Rhett always had you in the back of his mind. Ever since you left a cloud of dust in your rearview mirror six years ago, he regretted not going after you. He put all of his focus into working on the ranch, nearly breaking his back night and day to please his father but it was never good enough. He figured by getting on the back of a raging bull, following in Royal’s footsteps, that it would help their relationship. If anything, it just added salt to the preexisting wound. No matter how many arguments and screaming matches they had, Rhett still pursued bull riding. In those moments, he wished he could call you. He craved to hear your voice again, the voice that could talk him down from anything.

When you returned to Wabang, his mom would come home, brown paper bags in her arms from the day out on Main Street, talking about you. She would tell him how good you looked, how you were making it on your own in the city. Rhett would just nod along, smiling sadly at his mother’s bragging words. Of course you were doing good for yourself, he always knew you would. He was glad he didn’t hold you back. As the week dragged by, he was getting ready for his last ride at the fair. He couldn’t help but wonder if you would be there.

Friday night came in the blink of an eye. You were fussing with your hair for what felt like the tenth time in the past five minutes. You applied light makeup, a coat of mascara and a shiny gloss. You forwent your usual attire of sundresses, instead slipping on a pair of worn blue jeans and your cowboy boots that you hadn’t had on in years. Climbing in the backseat of your dad’s pickup truck brought back memories you had long forgotten about.

Going to the fair had been a yearly family tradition. You used to get so excited to go, to ride the rides and eat all of the sweet treats. Passing by the lit up town made your heart yearn, you felt a tug you couldn’t quite explain. Maybe you did miss this place. Maybe you missed the quietness, the laid back lifestyle as compared to the bustling pace of the city. You felt a calm wave wash over you as you pressed your temple to the cool glass of the window.

You were pulling into the gravel parking lot, the crunch of the rocks beneath the tires causing you an odd sense of anxiousness. You weren’t sure if it was the anticipation of seeing everyone again, or the nagging feeling that you were going to see Rhett. There was no avoiding it. Tonight was the big event, it seemed like everyone in Amelia County made their way out for it.

Taking in a deep breath and holding it for a few seconds before exhaling, you hopped out of the truck and made your way to the entrance. You walked arm-in-arm with your mother. You knew she was happy to have you back, you knew your father had been driving her crazy.

Martha Livingston was manning the ticket booth like she did every year since you were a little girl. She had more gray in her hair now but she was still the sweetest lady you remembered from your youth. As soon as she saw you, she busted out of the door and wrapped you up in a bone crushing hug.

“Sweet, little Y/N! Well, I guess you aren’t little anymore. My goodness, it’s been, what? Four years?” She had that high pitched voice that might annoy others, but it brought you a sense of comfort.

“Um, six actually. It’s good to see you Mrs. Livingston.”

“Honey, you know it’s Martha to you.” She gave your upper arm a firm squeeze before returning to her post, handing your parents the ticket stubs and sending you on your way.

The smells and sounds of the fair are never changing. The sickeningly sweet smell of funnel cakes and fried apple pies. The earthy smell of the animals and red dirt. The sound of hundreds of people holding different conversations. Bells dinging and children laughing. It all brought a smile to your face.

You said your hellos to familiar faces, telling the same story over and over. Yes, you’re in the city. Yes, it’s been years since you’ve been home for a longer period of time. Yes, you’re still single.

It’s been thirty minutes of exchanges and you were exhausted. You excused yourself to grab a drink, ordering a beer and making your way to the gates to watch the barrel racers. You picked at the label on the glass bottle, enjoying your few moments alone. That was until you felt someone press close into your side.

You looked to your left to see a tall man, clearly intoxicated, smiling down at you.

“Can I help you?” The question came out more snide than you had meant for it to. You couldn’t help it, especially because he was in your personal space.

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing standing all alone?” His words were slurred, his breath reeked of liquor. His hand came up to rest on your shoulder and you jerked away like you had been burned.

“Don’t touch me.”

“Oh, c’mon. Let me buy you another beer,” he said, leaning closer to your face. It took everything in you to not gag at the smell of tequila.

“Hey, Duncan! You get your hands off my girl!”

That voice. It caused your heart to stop. A voice you could recognize anywhere. You turned to look over your shoulder to see Rhett stalking towards you. He was dressed in his riding gear, hands balled into fists.

“Your girl?”

“Yes, my girl. Now get the fuck out of here before I break your jaw,” Rhett spat. His hand landed on your waist, protectiveness radiating from his body. Duncan made no effort to move, instead he stepped forward but before he could get in your face, Rhett shielded you. He put his entire body in front of yours and tucked you behind him.

“I think it’s best that you leave, man. I’m serious.”

“Whatever. You know what, you’re not even worth it.” Those words stung even though they were coming from that lowlife.

Rhett turned to face you and all of the breath left your body. His blue eyes stared directly into yours and you knew he was saying something, saw his mouth moving, but the roaring in your ears drowned out the words.

“Hey- hey, you okay? I’m sorry for saying that but I just- I could see you were uncomfortable.” He sounded shy, rubbing the back of his neck and looking down to the ground.

“It’s okay… Thank you for- for protecting me. For stepping in.”

It felt awkward, years have passed but he was still handsome as ever. He looked up at you again from under the brim of his hat and he had that small smile on his face that you couldn’t help but match.

“You look good.” His eyes traveled the length of your body, taking you in. “Nice boots.”

That made you laugh, a genuine sound that bubbled out of your chest. You shoved at his shoulder and grinned at the way his tongue stuck out between his teeth.

You stood there and talked for a few minutes, catching up before he was called back to the trailers by one of his crew mates.

“I’ll uh- can we grab a drink after this? To talk some more?”

“I’d like that. I'd like that a lot actually.”

Your smile warmed his heart, dusting off the cobwebs that had settled there. Seeing you in the stands and cheering his name after his ride gave him hope. Hope that maybe there was something still there.

taglist 🤍: @nobody7102 @endofdays56 @bradleybeachbabe @daughterofthereaper02 @the-ms-mischief @basiccortez @auroralightsthesky @buckys-estrella @hangmanbrainrot @marvelousmermaid @withahappyrefrain @wildbornsiren @queenbbarnes @top-gun-rooster @topgun-imagines @mrstabbymcwolfy @lt-bradshaw @violyn20 @wishing-on-wildflowers @therebeccaw @wkndwlff @luxuryberzatto @a-reader-and-a-writer @t-nd-rfoot @odegaardsreds @mxgyver @goosterroose

[sidekick-hero]

💫 Sandy, she/her, 30s, Europe 💫

writing tag ✍️ My AO3

🌈 Multichapter Fics 🌈

Suitcase of Memories (55k | explicit | co-written with @legitcookie)

Boy meets boy. Boy meets boy again. And again, so they decided to go on a date about it. But as they grow closer, Steve's insecurities threaten to pull them apart before they can even begin. Will fate intervene?

I wore his jacket for the longest time (58k | explicit | co-written with @legitcookie | Sequel to we pass the ghosts that haunt us later) 

Steve has made some bad choices in the past, choices that have cost him his marriage, and even worse than that, Eddie. The man he didn't realize he was in love with until it was too late. Now Steve must pick up the pieces of his life and figure out how to become the man he wants to be.

It's a story about love lost and love found, about the importance of friendship and family, and most of all, about second chances and how it's never too late to change.

I'll keep you like an oath (may nothing but death do us part) (20k | mature)

When Steve's grandmother dies, he finds out that he can only get his inheritance - half a million dollars - if he marries someone. It's her way of forcing Steve to live a heterosexual life. Sucks for her that gay marriage has been legalized since she wrote her will. Sucks for Steve that he doesn't have a man or woman in his life to marry.

Cue Eddie Munson, roommate and best friend of Robin's girlfriend Chrissy and the guy Steve has had a crush on for years. What could possibly go wrong?

I’m tired of asking to settle the debt (18k | explicit)

5 times Eddie warms Steve's hands and that one time Steve returns the favor.

Or: What if Steve and Eddie had met before the events of season 4? What if they kept bumping into each other because it was meant to be?

hold me close (I’m shaking apart) (WIP (2/3) | 15k | explicit)

It all came down to one simple truth: Steve Harrington was not at all what Eddie expected him to be, and it was confusing him to no end.

Or: Steve asks Eddie if he wants to experiment. Eddie wants so much more, but he takes what he can get and tries to not let it break his heart.

Dear Future Self (14.5k | explicit | pwp)

After the events of March '86, Eddie pines for his new friend, the former king of Hawkins High. Too scared to make a move, he has resigned himself to a life as Steve's friend and nothing more. That is, until one hot summer day, a naked guy appears out of nowhere in Steve's bedroom.

The naked guy is him from the future, and he says he's here to help Eddie pull his head out of his ass. It turns out that he and Steve are a happy couple in the future.

And as if that wasn't enough, he also offers to teach Eddie how to properly fulfill Stevie's needs. Sexy shenanigans ensue.

tangled with what I never said (4.1k | mature | angst with a happy ending)

And they were roomates.

🌈 Series 🌈

Modern AU - Teacher Steve and Musician Eddie (11k in 5 parts | rated T to explicit)

Just some snippets from the life of Teacher Steve Harrington and Wedding Band Singer turned Rockstar Eddie Munson.

Runner Steve Verse (14k in 2 parts | explicit)

Steve starts running to get out of his head. He finds that maybe he's been running towards something (or someone) all along.

🌈 One-Shots 10k+ 🌈

to the rhythm of eternity (18k | explicit)

The last two years Steve and Eddie have been doing the long distance thing when Steve visits Eddie in London for Christmas and falls in love with the city as well.

Emotional Motion Sickness (16.5k | explicit)

Steve's first night at a gay bar turns into something he never expected. He accidentally stumbles into a theme night - Kink Night - and discovers something new about himself.

🌈 One-Shots 5-10k 🌈

Would you fall for me? (8.8k | explicit | Porn with plot)

One-sided enemies to lovers au inspired by that cake scene in red, white and royal blue.

I'm down on my knees (I wanna take you there) (8.5k | explicit | Porn with feelings)

"I liked... how it felt when you held me by the throat. Just. Feeling your hands, knowing that I could let go and you'd got me. I felt, I dunno, safe? That's what I liked about it, I think."

Sequel to Emotional Motion Sickness.

Will you cleanse me with pleasure? (8.4k | explicit | PWP with tentacle love making)

Steve thinks it’s safe to say that he knows everything important about Eddie when they finally decide to move in together.

Everything, it turns out, except that Eddie sneaks out of the house in the middle of the night at least once a week.

he's all that I've got (don’t take that sinner from me) (8k | explicit | open but hinted at happy ending)

Eddie is on the run after still being blamed for the murders in Hawkins, but he can't run away from Steve.

Part 2: take you with me (mature | 2.1k)

The way you touch, the way you taste (7.1k | explicit | PWP)

Gareth, Jeff and Freak hire Steve to take Eddie's virginity on his birthday. Eddie takes Steve's heart in the process. Entry for the sub Eddie week.

You know I'm a show off (I would let you get some) (6.4k | explicit | PWP)

Eddie's neighbor is the hottest man in existence, so when he finds him washing his car in the shortest shorts known to man he can't stay away.

Love from the other side (6.2k | mature)

Steve works in the emergency room, where he has lost several patients with gaping wounds on their necks, the blood drained from their bodies. It's only because of Eddie, who is a vampire himself, that Steve doesn't end up like them, but what will he do when it's Eddie who needs help?

Part 2: sink you teeth

we were meant to be (we live happily in my fantasy) (5.6k | explicit | PWP)

Eddie is a Big-Shot-Rockstar and Steve is the escort he hired to get people off his back. Too bad he fell in love with him.

When I open my eyes to the future I can hear you say my name (5k | explicit | PWP)

Even after almost a decade together you can still discover new kinks.

Will the man become the monster, or the monster become man? (5k | explicit | PWP)

Beauty and the Beast AU with a twist: What if, once a month, the prince turns back into the beast?

🌈 One-Shots 1k-5k 🌈

I’ve got to get you out of my mind (and back into my arms) (4.7k | explicit | PWP)

Every once in a while, Steve and Eddie like to spice up their sex life and go out to play.

Lay all your love on me (4.6k | explicit | porn with feelings)

Steve feels lonely on Valentine's Day '87 and a certain metalhead sets out to change that.

wear me like a locket around your throat (4.5k | explicit | PWP co-written with @yournowheregirl)

It doesn't really matter why, the fact remains that Eddie is making Steve a little bit feral, and the animal part of his brain demanded that he do something about it.

And that's why he bought Eddie a fucking collar, of all things.

tell me it's love, tell me it's real (4k | explicit | PWP co-written with @yournowheregirl)

The infamous piano scene from Pretty Woman (1990).

Carry You (4k | teen)

Written for @steddielovemonth, prompt: Love is letting someone take care of you.

Eddie is living the rockstar life, but it comes with a prize. When he reaches a point where he can't go on like that, will he finally let Steve carry him?

Part 2: Dear Steve (teen | 2.3k)

we tangle endlessly like lovers entwined (3.4k | explicit | Porn with feelings)

It's canon Steve likes to hold hands during sex.

Safe Haven (3.2k | teen)

Eddie finds a hurt wolf in the woods and takes him home. He has no idea that there is more to this particular wolf than it seems.

Part 2: Eat you alive (wc: 1.8k | mature)

Drowning In You (3.2k | teen | co-written with @legitcookie)

Steve and Eddie spend some time swimming at the quarry. At night. In just their underwear. As you do.

on the tip of my tongue, on top of my thighs (2.8k | explicit | PWP)

Eddie may be a little obsessed with Steve's chest. Okay, drop the a little.

The road to hell (2.8k | mature | demon!Steve crack fic)

Based on the prompt: It’s a bit awkward that you managed to actually summon a demon; almost as awkward as that demon being your ex spouse.

He was sweet like honey (2.7k | explicit | PWP)

Steve loves mint chocolate chip ice cream. Eddie loathes it. But Steve has an idea how he can change Eddie's mind.

will you take me home (2.7k | teen)

Robin wants to adopt a cat, so why does Steve end up with one, too?

Rooting for you (2.6k | explicit)

Steve screwed up, no way around it. Fucked up big time.

In his defense, he didn't know that Eddie was in love with him. How could he have known? For all intents and purposes, they were just two horny guys hooking up.

safe & sound (2.5k | teen)

What happens when Steve meets Eddie Munson, who has just failed his senior year for the first time, during one of his nightly drives?

are you still mine? (2.4k | teen)

"He kissed me," Steve blurts out, and to Robin's credit, she doesn't react except for her hand on his to twitch in surprise. She makes a questioning sound in her throat, clearly waiting for more.

So much (for) Stardust (2.3k | teen)

A scene from an upcoming fic Pickup Note with @thefreakandthehair and art by @firefly-party. Steve can't sleep and Eddie takes him stargazing.

the past, the future, through death my arms are open (2.1k | mature)

second part to are you still mine? where Steve remembers another moment from their shared past where Eddie has been there for him even when he didn't ask for it

will you find me in the stars (2.1k | mature)

In every life, in every universe, they will find each other again. What’s a lifetime if you measure it in eternity?

true colors (2.1k | explicit)

Eddie's heart is beating for Steve but it takes Steve a bit to understand what it is saying.

Slaying Dragons (2.1k | gen)

Eddie was six years old when he first met Steve, not that he would remember it until much, much later.

Blinded by you (2.1k | teen)

The one in which Eddie is a hot mess but Paramedic Steve doesn't mind.

Crutch (2k | mature)

Steve loves Eddie, he really, really does. He just can’t say it.

Louder (2k | explicit | PWP)

While laying in bed, the two of them can't help but overhear their upstairs neighbors going at it rather loudly. Eddie turns to Steve after a while, and asks, You wanna fuck louder than them to establish dominance?

(I just) died in your arms (1.9k | teen | co-written with @legitcookie and @yournowheregirl)

"Hey, Steve, hi. You're probably wondering what I'm doing here." Eddie smiles nervously. When Steve just blinks at him, he takes that as a cue to continue.

"Funny story, actually," He laughs. The lack of sleep must be kicking in, which always makes him feel a little drunk and giddy. "There's this really annoying pipe in my room that's slowly driving me crazy, and I really, really, really need to get some sleep, man. I might even start crying if I don't get some soon. So, I was wondering... Could I crash in here?"

Someone New (1.7k | teen)

After Vecna, Eddie thinks he lost something vital, the one thing that made him Eddie. Steve teaches him that that's not true.

Butterfly Effect (1.5k | mature)

Eddie Munson is bad at feelings, but Steve makes him talk about them anyway, at least in metaphors.

Your scent (it clings to every blanket, sheet and pillowcase) (1.5k | mature)

Life after March '86 is very different from life before. For one thing, he never almost died before. Nor did he ever have anyone accuse him of murder, never mind murders, as in plural.

But then again, he didn't have Steve Harrington before either.

Until I found you (1.5k | mature)

Steve reminds Eddie that you can't buy happiness, you find it in each other.

You got a fast car (1.4k | teen)

"If we leave now, we can be in Indiana before midnight," Steve hears himself say, the decision already made, because the alternative is blood and pain and sorrow.

something about us (1.4k | teen)

What starts out as one of the worst nights of his college life turns into something else when Steve meets Eddie while being banned from his dorm room in the middle of the night thanks to some asshole setting off the fire alarm.

when we were made it was no accident (1.2k | teen)

Steve and Eddie just started dating, it's all new, it's all fragile and most of all, it's still a secret. So when they have a soundcheck coming up, they can't both be late because they can't make themselves to leave the bed, can't they? (part of @thefreakandthehair and @firefly-party and mine project pickup note)

we can be heroes (1.2k | gen)

Love makes Steve brave. And Steve loves fast and hard.

Once those two things become a certainty in Eddie's mind, other things fall into place.

When it rains and shines (1.2k | teen)

written for the stwg daily prompt kiss in the rain

only soul I ever saved (1.1k | explicit)

With Steve, Eddie can be soft. Obediant and sweet. With Steve, Eddie can be a good boy.

hate to be lame (1.1k | mature)

Eddie and Steve are spies working for competing agencies. They make it work.

Somehow, I just want you more (1k | teen)

When Chrissy sets Eddie up for a blind date he did not expect to find a ghost from his past waiting for him.

🌈 Drabbles (<1k) 🌈

I want you to want me (921 | teen)

let the impulse to love and the instinct to kill entangle to one (918 | teen)

Connoisseur of Comfort (652 | gen)

Grow back your sharpest teeth, you know my desire (548 | explicit)

Show them (Baby I'm yours)  (534 | explicit)

Sugar, I got a taste for you now (480 | explicit)

Okay, so I'm the dragon. Big deal. (442 | gen)

always on the tip of my tongue (387 | teen)

Deflated. Devoured. Defiled. (311 | explicit)

hole-in-the-wall (404 | gen)

love bites (404 | mature)

mine (404 | explicit)

Ahoy Sailor! (404 | mature)

My arms belong around you (509 | mature)

Like real people do (846 | gen)

that ultra-kind of love (you never walk away from) (509 | teen)

Let Go (509 | explicit)

Anything for love (790 | teen)

moonlit bonding (388 | teen)

blow my candle (290 | explicit)

Strangers Passing (380 | teen)

Sir Lancelot (482 | teen)

On top of the world (616 | teen)

Along for the ride (510 | teen)

[madhatterbri]

Star-Crossed | Hangman A.P.

Summary: A fic about the time two star-crossed lovers didn't make it and the one time they did.

Author's Note: Bored? Play my newest escape room found here. Also, fair warning, this is sad.

Hangman Adam Page Masterlist

Taglist: @plentyoffandoms @theworldofotps @hotgirlgraps

🇺🇲

The year was 1865. Despite vowing to never return, Adam Page found himself walking through the fields of Gettysburg. The wind blew through his blonde hair. Despite the calm scenery, he still saw the bodies of comrades scattered amongst the fields.

His boots carried him as memories continued to pour in. Lost in the thoughts of his mind, he didn't notice he was in front of her house until it was too late. His green eyes filled with tears.

Y/N was his first love, his only love. Her family moved to Gettysburg when she was a little girl. When he sent her an urgent letter that war was coming to her, she wouldn't leave. He took a shaky breath and blinked.

Papers after the Battle of Gettysburg reported that their was only one civilian casualty. A girl by the name of Jennie Wade, who was shot by a stray bullet. There was no recollection of his Y/N. It was as if she never existed.

Adam walked into the house. Long abandoned after the owner died, nature was starting to reclaim the house and land. His eyes played tricks on him. All the times they spent in the house together. Adam dropped to his knees and cried.

🐎

The year was 1875. "Hangman" Adam Page was now sheriff in the Wild West. He used the skills picked up in the military to bring lawlessness down in his little town. He was favored heavily by his governor, Tony Khan.

Despite the fact that he was doing good, he made a lot of enemies. Men who would love to hurt him at any cost. He had a group of men to protect him, though. Friends such as the Young Bucks and Kenny Omega to keep things in order.

Adam managed to fall in love again. A dead ringer of his lost Y/N, she made her loss seem almost bearable. She knew all about his lost love. Long and countless nights, he would wake up whimpering. The image of her slain body appeared so real before him.

One night, he came home to the wooden door left open. His friends looked at each other nervously. One of his numerous enemies must have found the hideout. He cursed and jumped off his horse. Revolver in hand, Adam ran inside and stopped. He started to yell no.

Adam dropped to his knees and scooped her in his arms. Tears poured down to her face. There was no surviving this. Even if a doctor was to burst it at any moment. She looked at him as the light left her eyes.

"At least I got to see you one last time,"

❤️

Adam Page made his way through the busy city that was hosting AEW that night. Lost in his phone, he managed to bump into a woman. Their phones dropped on the floor.

"I'm so sorry. I wasn't paying attention," Y/N sighed and picked up their phones.

"It's on me, darling. I didn't mean to," he stopped when their eyes finally met. The woman had a familiarity with her. Maybe she went to a previous show of his. "Do I know you?"

"Not yet, but I wouldn't mind knowing you," she answered.

Adam smiled, and the two of them started to walk together. Behind them, the ghosts of their past smiled at one another. Maybe this time, they would finally be together.

[twis-world]

Must You Really Leave?

Mentions: Riddle Centric, 2nd Person, Gender Neutral Reader, Heavy Angst

The mirror chamber was one of the few rooms you were familiar with ever since your arrival to Twisted Wonderland.

In fact, you made it quite a point to avoid it at all costs.

Why would you want to go near the room that held your one guaranteed to a chance at returning home. One that was oh so slim that it was nearly impossible to find the proper ritual that would ensure your safe return with its magic. 

It felt unreal, almost like a dream as you stood in the middle of it. Bag in hand filled with mementos of those you came to eventually call your family, pockets stuffed with numerous letters said family insisted you take to remember them by, ears buzzing with the echoes of their farewells.

All but one.

“I assume you have everything you require for your safe return?” Riddle inquired, voice tense and jaw ticking as he struggled to maintain a blank face. Hands were ever so dutifully placed behind his back, white clenched fists hiding behind the facade of the ever so composed head of Heartslabyul. Posture pin straight as always and head held high, the embodiment of perfection.

You knew better, though. You always knew better and he hated you for it. 

He hated that he couldn’t fool you like all the others.

Hated that you couldn’t just accept the mask he created to make this all the less painful.

Hated that instead of turning away from him and walking away forever you had to gently put your bag down and straighten without once looking away.

Hated that you had to put on that stupid smile and open up your arms in the way that you knew he couldn’t turn away from.

Most importantly, he hated himself. 

Oh, how he despised every fiber of his weak being for breaking so easily in that moment and practically running into them.

The mask he so expertly crafted shattered the moment your gentle touch envelope him, and the dam he cemented inevitably began to leak as he tucked his head into its usual spot. The safe haven that he had spent nights cradled in, face hidden away by the safety of the angelic being that was you, mere moments away from forever being taken away from him. The loving arms that took up their usual place around him, stroking his back with such grace that his lips trembled at the thought of being stripped of it. The very arms that always held him oh so gently throughout his journey of redemption. Protecting him from the dark thoughts and doubts that tortured him after the hell you saved him from when you first came to this world.

Then reality truly hit and not even he could stop the broken sob that slipped out.

He didn’t notice how you tensed, your hands freezing at the agonizing sound of your lover in such pain. Pain that you brought him, pain that you once promised you would never inflict because you would be different. Different from all those who failed him in the past, different from even himself who for a long time believed himself unworthy of the love and affection you promised to bring him. Yet here you were, bringing the Riddle Rosehearts to his knees.

“Must…must you really leave?” He choked, voice warbled and words slurred as he scrambled to hold you tighter than ever before. It was pathetic, childish, immature, and he should have composed himself right there and then to save whatever ounce of dignity he may have had left in such a moment. For the first time, though, he found that he didn’t care. If it meant that he would get just a minute more of time with you then he would scream and cry without shame.

Your heart shattered as his wails echoed throughout the mirror chamber, hiccups chipping your sanity one by one. The ache in your knees was ignored as you shuffled even closer to him, ensuring that not an ounce of space was left between your bodies. An act that hurt even more than you thought as memories of late night embraces flooded your mind. The moments of pure love and vulnerability that were meant for no one but you and him, parts of yourselves shared that would never belong to anyone but the other. Yet here you were, stealing it all away.

Yes, you were very cruel.

The silence that surrounded you was answer enough apparently as his weeping grew louder, borderline desperate as his hands clawed at your back. The way he pressed himself against you made it seem as if he was trying to mold himself into your person, an futile attempt to become one and prevent the cruel fate that awaited you both.

It was almost funny, terribly so you thought.

The one thing you wanted more than anything since you were first snatched from everything you knew and loved was turning out to be so torturous that you were starting to consider…

That would be selfish though, would it not?

You had a life. You had friends, family, hopes, dreams, wishes that you fought for, ones that were just a few steps and a mirror trip away. All the longing, the fear, the despair you felt when dozens of leads led to nothing but anguish and disappointment. Would it all be for nothing if you didn’t seize the only way home you had now?

However, would it not be even worse if you were to leave the one who was with you every step of the way?

He who wiped away your tears on the days where the homesickness was all consuming. He who brought a smile to your face and washed away all the doubt when you questioned your worth in the new world. He who shed all his thorns and instead used them to protect you from all the evil of the unknown you were forcibly thrust into.

Your rose.

Would it be just as worth it to leave him behind to welt and decay, as you inevitably would if you decide to part?

The small bit of doubt you hid since the Headmaster's announcement of the discovery of your way home began to grow, and as you absentmindedly began to caress Riddle's head as he continued to cry you felt it begin to consume.

Must you really leave?

[gingermintpepper]

SO BASICALLY,

The general concept is that Hyacinthus, the (secret) sixth prince of Laconia is sent to Olympia to help out after the catastrophic earthquake that's completely paralysed the town. He gets there, he's given his land and he finds this cool statue of his Very Handsome Man on his land and would you look at that, the Very Handsome Statue is talking to him and introduced himself as Apollo, how nice-!

In short, it's something of a domestic mystery - much like in Fields of Mistria itself, the earthquake has awakened old magic in Olympia once more due to interfering with the seals far below the earth. Hyacinthus, motivated to help Apollo get his lost memories back and for the good of the town, traverses down the mines so he can break the seals and, in the process, maybe un-statue the really hot guy that's sharing this farmland with him.

Below the cut I'll put the list of the characters I assigned to the townspeople if you're interested <33

Farmer → Hyacinthus

Sent by the Adventurer’s Guild to help repair Olympia. Is the only one that can hear the voice of the Radiant from the statue on his farm. Sixth prince of Laconia, still in contact with his family, wanted to help his people after the disaster. 

Caldarus → Apollo

A God of old Olympia, used to be widely worshipped but is now sealed away deep under the earth. Has lost most of his memories along with much of his power but has recently reawakened due to a disaster which disrupted his seals. Can only communicate to Hyacinthus through the statue on his farm.  

Balor → Hermes

A prolific merchant who excels at delivering quality goods in unorthodox places. Took a special interest in Olympia after the disaster and remained the town’s sole contact to the outside world in the wake of their bridge collapsing. Always smiling and extremely mysterious - he has suspiciously low prices despite the danger of his work. 

Nora → Demeter

Head of Olympia’s Chamber of Commerce and co-owner of the General Store in town. Works closely with both Hermes and Hektor to keep the town running smoothly as well as coordinate the restoration of Olympia after the disaster. 

Holt → Triptolemus 

Co-owner of the General Store and Demeter’s life partner. Extremely reliable but a bit lost without Demeter’s instructions, he’s extremely skilled at cultivating crops and is responsible for stocking the general store with seasonal seeds and saplings. Strictly vegetarian.

Celine → Persephone

Demeter’s daughter and an avid lover of flowers. Constantly busy with the beautification of Olympia when she’s not researching the rare and mythical flora of Olympia’s past. She handles stocking the general store with seasonal flower seeds and furniture. Is in a secret relationship with Hades, one of the merchants from out of town.

Dell → Pelops

Demeter’s ward and a greatly troubled child. Rambunctious with a very vivid imagination, he has big dreams of returning to the capital and taking his rightful place as a Duke. Due to the remote nature of Olympia, it is the perfect place for him to be hidden away from his father’s madness and, luckily, no one in Olympia takes his tales seriously. Demeter worries about him endlessly.

Eiland → Cassandra

The younger child of the Baron and Baroness of Olympia, she is greatly concerned with the history and architecture of Olympia. Extremely perceptive and always on the lookout for more hints about Olympia’s buried past. Founded the History Society so she could more effectively research her current obsession, the scattered steles of a long dead god.

Adeline → Hektor

The elder child of the Baron and Baroness of Olympia, after the disaster struck he dedicated himself to restoring Olympia at all costs. He truly believes in the people and potential of this town and though he has never been particularly superstitious, he has found himself more inclined to pray and pay attention to natural omens since starting this project. He personally dedicates himself to working alongside Hyacinthus for the sake of restoring Olympia to its former glory. 

Elsie → Paris

Older relative of the Baron and a Count, he agreed to look after Hektor and Cassandra in Olympia while their parents were away. Seems to prefer Olympia’s quieter countryside but always has a story or two to tell about his exploits in the Capital. Seems especially fond of a particular man and woman he left behind in favour of coming to live with the Baron and his family.

Juniper → Penthesilea

A foreign woman who has not entirely settled into Olympia. Runs the bathhouse and gym and spends a lot of time on the Eastern Road. Is especially interested in the seals and inscriptions scattered around Olympia but staunchly refuses to join the History Society. Apparently, she is not very fond of Orpheus. 

Valen → Orpheus

The extremely skilled but extremely reserved town doctor. He has a clinic in the town centre and mostly keeps to himself, though he is especially fond of flowers and trees. Doesn’t speak much and instead prefers to write his thoughts down or communicate with sign language. Wears a wedding ring but notably, lives alone.  

Olric → Zephyrus

The older of the blacksmithing duo, a gentle man with a big heart. Part of the History Society and very enthusiastic about life, he was part of a skilled band of adventurers called the ‘Anemoi’ before eventually retiring and moving to Olympia. Spends a lot of his time on high hills and summits and can speak the language of flowers. Is good friends with Persephone.

March → Dionysus

The younger of the blacksmithing duo and undoubtedly the more skilled craftsman of the two, has been working extremely hard to help put the town to rights after the disaster and is a bit on edge because of it. Super welcoming and friendly but also somewhat unsettling due to his intensity, doesn’t actually care much about smithing and would much rather spend his days making wine casks and custom drinking cups.

Hemlock → Asclepius

Co-owner of the Sleeping Eclipse Inn and the town doctor before Orpheus moved in. He’s an anchor of the town and the inn is Olympia’s beating heart. Extremely well-read and a skilled luthier he helps wherever he can. Due to some difficulties with his health after the disaster, his family has been forcing him to take it easy. Cries every time he hears Orpheus sing.

Josephine → Epione

Co-owner of the Sleeping Eclipse Inn and the town veterinarian. She’s a powerful woman, the second tallest person in Olympia and very intimidating on first glance because of it. Despite this, she is extremely gentle-natured and always has a smile for those who enter her doors, works closely with Aristaeus to ensure the town’s internal supply of animal produce isn’t threatened, especially after the massive losses taken after the disaster. Was a ranger before she met Asclepius and still has her horse, Miel.

Reina → Iaso

Eldest child of Asclepius and Epione, was educated in the Capital but came home in a huff due to a major blowout with her boss at the hospital she worked at. Currently studying the healing power of food and cooking and works as the Sleeping Eclipse’s chef while she does her research. Is extremely concerned about her father’s health but refuses to let it show.  

Luc → Machaon

Middle child of Asclepius and Epione, he is determined to become a surgeon and surpass his father’s legend. Very smart young lad and one of the few people in town who completely believes Pelops’ stories, he loves small animals like insects and birds and often tries to nurse any small injured creature he can find back to health. Is fascinated by Pelops’ shoulder prosthetic and hopes to one day be able to make such a difference for someone else.

Maple → Hygeia

Youngest child of Asclepius and Epione, is a  twin but her sister died shortly after being born. Despite never knowing her sister, Hygeia struggles with a deep sense of loneliness and grief that has only recently started to ease with the help of the townspeople. Adores Orpheus and often spends the day shadowing him in the hopes of hearing him sing or play his lute. She is the only one Orpheus talks to about his dead wife.

Ryis → Thamyris

A carpenter who studied music in the Capital, came to Olympia shortly before the disaster at his friend’s request and was trapped after the bridge collapsed. Has a bit of a poor attitude due to once having big dreams of becoming a famous bard but is now too attached to Olympia to leave, no matter how much he grumbles about its backwater nature. Is convinced there’s something singing in the mines but is completely useless with a sword. 

Landen → Hippolytus

Owner of the Red-tailed Stag House of Carpentry (or the Stag House for short) and a very good friend of Thamyris. He gave up on urban life a long time ago and is dedicated to living in oneness and harmony with nature. Strictly vegetarian and kind of a stickler for his views being respected, he’s been on edge since the disaster since there’s been a massive change in the lands of Olympia. Most of the townspeople don’t take him seriously, but Penthesilea seems to think of him as a kindred spirit. He doesn’t work on the 6th or 16th of every month.  

Errol → Eros

Museum Curator, ex-adventurer and all around incredibly offputting guy, despite his open nature and pretty face, Eros seems to know everything about everything yet is unwilling to share that information with the rest of the town. His only delight seems to be the History Society and he is extremely pleased that Hyacinthus has decided to collect old artefacts and explore the mines. Apart from Cassandra, Eros is the only one that acknowledges the statue on Hyacinthus’ farm and occasionally passes by just to stare at it.  

Hayden → Aristaeus

Owner of Sweetwind Farm and the only other farmer in Olympia, Aristaeus has deep roots in this town and his family has lived and farmed here for generations. Skilled with animals and is extremely handy with preserving food, pressing olives into oil and keeping bees, he has almost single-handedly kept the town fed during the worst of the shortages brought on by the disaster despite the losses to his animals. Has a deep aversion to dogs and wishing stars. Seems to know a few things about Olympia’s history that no one else does but isn’t exactly eager to talk about it.

Terithia → Medea

A beautiful woman who lives alone on the beach. Has lived a long and eventful life and refers to Olympia as her ‘jail-cell’, her ‘gilded cage’ and her ‘death-house’ based on her mood. Much like Eros, she seems to know many things but is not inclined to let anyone else know, but unlike Eros, she very openly spins exciting tales of her youth when she was a court sorceress and princess. Though she doesn’t do much magic these days, she still has the knowledge and is always willing to decode some arcane knowledge for a price. 

Obviously there are a lot of liberties taken for the sake of the AU but that's the broad strokes of it. Thanks for asking about it @gotstabbedbyapen !!

[countrymusiclover]

22 - More Than One Plan

Part 23

The Lion Knight and Dragon Princess

Tags- just send an ask to be added @cdragons @kmc1989 @starkleila @noirrose21-blog @lover-of-books-and-tea

Some smut in this part

A couple of soldiers had returned us to our now shared chambers along with some poured warm water for the bath. Strolling around the room I eyed the tray of food that had been set out before they left us alone without a word. Now that we were alone I bent down on one knee reaching inside one boot of my boots I was wearing, taking out a folded piece of paper that the guards thankfully didn’t find when they took my dagger from me. “What do you know about Sothoryos?” Unrolling the paper the map sprawled out on the stone table near the window.

Jaime pushed himself up from sitting on the bed coming behind me peeking over my shoulder seeing what I was looking at. “From what I remember it has been teased that it lies southeast of Westeros and is across the Summer Sea.”

“So we’ll need men who know how to sail. I wonder if we could raid the Greyjoy’s fleet.” I muttered to myself in thought.

“Why are you looking at the maps for an area that no one knows anything about?”

Turning around to face him he takes a step backwards watching my messy gown sway with my movements. “My sister has her army so we should have our own.”

“We have the Lannister army.”

Shaking my head in disagreement. “That won’t be enough. One dragon isn’t even enough against her three.”

“Vaella, what are you talking about?” My husband asked.

Lowering my gaze I kept my eyes on my muddy boots not having the strength to look him in the eye when I uttered such treasonous words out into the room. “An escape plan.”

“Vaella-“ He trailed off seeing angry tears forming in my eyes and my hands clutching into fists at my sides, reminding him almost of Cersei so he did his best to push those past memories back deep down inside his mind.

“She has many opportunities to kill you or me. To kill our children and I refuse to let it come down to that.”

Jaime ran a hand down his face, sighing heavily once he realized what I was getting at. “Don’t get me wrong I don’t entirely trust her but this isn’t the time or place to be talking about it.”

“So you don’t agree with me. That we should have a backup plan in mind.” I hung my mouth open in shock.

He stepped closer to me, meeting my purple gaze. “I do agree with you that she's dangerous. But what you’re suggesting could cost us both our lives.”

“You told me once something your father used to say. What does a lion do?”

Jaime dropped his gaze to the ground. “The Lion does not concern himself with the opinions of the sheep.”

“You are a Lion. I am a Dragon. We are two great houses combined together in love. And our family is the only thing that matters. You, Luciya, Rhaegar, Amethyst and our new babe are the only ones I’d commit such an act of treason for!” I raised my voice before Jaime suddenly clasped a hand over my mouth making me gasp at his action.

His green eyes trained on mine filled with love. “Why am I just finding out about this now?”

“Probably because I didn’t find out about it myself until a few weeks after you had left.” I apologized with a weak smile.

Jaime cupped my face in his hands kissing me for the first time since we had been reunited right in front of my younger sister. “I love you, Vaella.”

“I love you too - we shouldn’t let the water go cold.” Running my fingers up his tunic shirt undoing the buttons and tossing it onto the stone floor. Jaime spun me around pressing my back against his front burying his nose in my neck.

I couldn’t help but giggle in anticipation feeling his left hand untying the laces of my red gown. The first time he had attempted this I had to aid him doing such a task. Once I felt the fabric pile onto the floor I stepped over the fabric where I bent down removing his trousers and we got inside the warm water just enjoying the comfortable silence that had filled the room just holding onto one another.

He tugged my flesh against his chest making me drop the rag onto the tile floor. Resting my hands on his bare chest our eyes met when he rested his forehead against mine. "I know I must have looked like an idiot during the trial. But I wouldn’t let her kill my love..and anyone who tries shall have to go through me.” He smashed his lips onto mine pushing me against the tub wall.

“I thought I’d lost you when your body went into the water.” I rasped out, moving my hands over every part of him I physically could.

We stumbled out of the bathtub where he only broke the kiss once laying my back on the bed. "What do you want, dragon princess?"

"You, my golden knight.” I squealed because the second the word left my mouth he flipped our position pushing me down on my back. He had his hands on either side of me smirking, lightly kissing me deeply.

I began to move against him and leaned up pressing my lips down upon his. He embraced me back instantly when my fingers dug into his back, both of us slick with sweat as he moved against one another, our pants and moans filling the room.

He leaned up on his knees and began to thrust his little wife at a deeper pace hitting a certain spot inside of her. "J-Jaime! " I moaned out before he connected our lips again.

The bed was moving against our actions where he kept hitting the specific spot that we both moaned afterwards to. He broke the kiss where I held his face in my hands tracing his cheek with him thrusting into me slowly. "Vae!" He moaned when I pulled his head downward burying my face in his neck nuzzling my nose and kissing into his skin.

We didn’t bother untangling our limbs from one another just laying in the bed furs. Jaime’s fingers danced across my bare shoulder where I rolled over to face him, allowing me the ability to twirl his blonde curls in between my fingers. “What are you thinking now, princess?”

“I want to go back to simpler times. Where it was just us and the kids back at the Rock. Where we didn’t have to worry about having become traitors and running for our lives for another time. I - I thought I was done with hiding.”

Jaime rolled me onto my back hovering above me putting his weight on his real hand and the fake golden one. “You never have to feel like a prisoner ever again.”

“Except I still am a prisoner. This is not our home, the Rock is.” I admitted weakly.

He wrapped his arms around my waist rolling himself onto his back leaving me to be sitting above him. “The Rock is simply that a ridiculous rock. What did I tell you the last time you felt like this?”

“Home is with the people you love.” I grinned down at him, kissing him gently and for that moment we let our minds go back to what I suppose you can call our honeymoon faze.

[vminity21]

Once Upon A Dream | ot7

Pairing: ot7 x reader, soulmate!au

Word Count: 26,480

Genre: fluff, smut, angst, soulmate!au, f2l!au, strangers to lovers!au, established relationship!au

Warning(s): profanity, angst, smut, unprotected sex, nipple play, oral (m + f receive), slight f!dom, breast worship, hand job, clit play, fingering, brief mention of depression, Rated: 18+

Summary: In this universe, not a single individual is aware that deep in the depths of harmonious slumber, dreams will show them a future that holds their forever. Their soulmate. There are seven different stories each embodied by different themes that all hold one thing in common: the power of true love's kiss.

Pairing: collegestudent!namjoon x adulting!reader, f2l!au (18+)

“What do you mean it costs this much?” When shock mingling with frustration forms into an exasperated sigh, your hand rakes through your hair in disbelief portraying the definition of stress in its purest authenticity. Your fingers that are curled around the auto insurance bill leave small indents behind when the dreaded piece of paper is now being placed upon the table. “Damnit,” tears flood your eyes while your palms shadow over your cheeks. You have already set money aside to save for the rent for your apartment along with your car payment as well as savings toward your electricity cost. Today, the discovery of your current expense being fifty more dollars than usual means that, yet another week goes by with surviving off the little groceries you have left stored in your pantry.

Shoving out of your jacket, the light air of spring has begun, and for once, you would like to appreciate nature without the anxious feeling of life overwhelming your mind. Eyes scanning the vacancy of your apartment, loneliness returns, and the yearn to hear your mother’s voice has never felt so painful. It has only been six months since you moved hours away for a job offer that you felt would be a good opportunity to further you into the career you have sought for. But, never in your existence did you dream that living paycheck to paycheck could bring so much misery, and hardly being able to speak to your mother has been weighing heavy on your conscious, but your determination to make her proud is what matters to you the most.

The jingle of your keys resonates the living room congruent with the shift of your feet wiggling into your tennis shoes. If there is anywhere you want to be right now, it’s not in this apartment, not near the opened envelopes of woe, not near your bedroom that reminds you of your exhaustion, and not near the refrigerator that is empty of any content that can fill your tummy. The drive to the local park flourishing with pinks and whites of cherry blossoms comes into view quicker than you anticipate, and with schools being in session, the area is not as crowded as it would be on the weekends. Petals float in the wind, swooping to the ground to paint the cement with color- your footsteps slow when the tunnel of tree branches exuberates perfumes of the florets to ease your tense frame.

You return to work tomorrow, but gratefully there is plenty of hours left in the day to explore, and with the solace of the atmosphere, it feels nice to escape from the turmoil of watching your paycheck disappear in order to live. A bench appears further into the path, mahogany tint with protruding sunlight breaking through the trees. Memories of what you consider your ‘past life’ churns with images of times where your grandfather shared stories of his childhood speaking lines of wisdom that encouraged you to be the person that you will and have become. He was the first soul to bring you to a park when you were younger, giving you a tour of what all there was to see- your almond eyes widened with wonder, gripping his hand while you would point out all the sights.

You miss those days more than you will profess, wishing you can relive them especially with what you have been enduring since your move. Gaze dropping to your shoes, hands in pockets- you gasp in surprise when your shoulder meets the figure of someone walking from the opposite direction,

“I’m sorry!” Panic is etched in your voice while you swiftly bow, a blush creeping to your cheeks in embarrassment when your steps quicken along the path. The tone belongs to a man who apologizes in return, yet your eyes keep their focus away from him; you’re very timid, something you’ve struggled with since the day you were born, and it’s hard enough to face your fears as it is, and uncertain on if the stranger would have been angry with you, you find it best to pretend it never happened. At least here, you feel safe alongside nature, and when the familiar sound of a rippling lake perks your auditory senses, a small tug of relief pulls at the corner of your lips, and the earlier chagrin of interrupting someone on their tread will no longer disturb your meditation.

-

 Something seems familiar about this place. Blusterous winds streaming through strands of your hair that tickle your shoulders beneath the blinding rays of the sun where grass pokes at your legs that are exposed from the end of your dress wrinkled upon your thighs. Cumulus clouds keep their distance from the beams flickering immensely within the blanket of blue, brightening the vibrancy of yellow flowers swaying beside stems of rubicund leaflets enhancing the field in iridescent whispers of delicacy.

You have seen this all before somewhere in the slumbers of imagination where your heart aches for peace such as this. Steeps of ornate mountains encompass the field in lavender shades collecting the finishing touches of scenery your dreams desire. But, there is something different. Rather, the sense that you are alone diminishes which prompts your vision to parade the panorama of daylight until a figure enters a distance ahead of you. A pile of wispy, dark hair clears to reveal a man, eyes closed- the backs of his hands posed upon his knees leading to his fingers aimed upward mirroring the position you are in. How he seems so close when he is far away startles you even while you memorize the sight of his thick lips lying in a straight line of content.

Your head tilts in profound concentration of where you may have seen him- where you may have known him, but you come up empty, for here in this world of tranquility, you have not seen him here before. There is a strange ponder of wanting to rise to your feet, but you lean forward instead, observing the slow rise and fall of his chest where he breathes in and out deeply. He is clothed in white, darkening his already tanned skin- your stare tracing from his neck to see his face once more, and when your lids squint to study him,

He opens his eyes-

-

“Ma’am? Ma’am,” the echo of a calm voice breaks through enough to awaken your bleary eyes, “Ma’am, are you okay?” Drool gathered at the corner of your mouth you swipe with the hem of your sleeve; your eyes are sensitive from how bright it is outside, and it takes a moment for them to adjust once you turn your head gradually in order to remember where you are. The flowing trickles of water, the soreness of your back scratching from the log of a tree, and the soft squeeze of a large hand on your shoulder alarms you enough to realize you fell asleep while reminiscing at the lake.

You refrain from cursing under your breath when nerves shoot through your veins, gathering yourself enough to look at whoever is hovering above you. Stuttering to find words, you weakly accept the strong hand offered to you to help you up. Concern is etched in the shape of brown irises reading your stare while nostalgia fogs your brain. “Do I- do I know you?” Your voice is hardly a murmur, but he timidly steps away, the familiarity of his face bringing a quiet gasp to your parting lips.

“We, uh, we um, ran into each other earlier,”

“Oh no,” shame shudders your shoulders when you press your forehead into your palm to lightly rub your eyes, “God, I’m so sorry-”

“No, no it’s okay! Really, it’s okay. It was an accident-”

“I should have watched where I was going-”

“Well, I should have, too.”

With a creased forehead, your body is still recovering from your unexpected nap, and you’re trying to feign bravery to return your eyes to the stranger whose hair is hidden within a black beanie, yet dark tufts brush the tips of his ears. Dimples illuminate his rising cheeks from the tiny grin embellishing his expression, and dialogue disappears from your tongue at the noticing of how exquisite he is.

“Kim Namjoon,” his large hand swallows yours as it did minutes ago, but this time in a polite shake of greeting.

“I’m [Y/N],” you nod seeing his grin widen to cause a silent sweep of relief to your system.

“Wait a minute,” your eyelids enlarge from the recognition now embracing your thoughts. Flashbacks from high school smother you immediately when the images of a quiet persona who sauntered the hallways with the intelligence of an Einstein clicks on a lightbulb subconsciously. “I do know you, we-” wetting your lips, you stammer in fear of being wrong, “We went to the same grade school. You- you beat me at the math competition! Wh- what brings you to Gyeongju?”

“College,” his voice is shaky for you to jolt at the realization that you are still shaking his hand- roughly you might add, awkwardly releasing to return your limb to your side. It’s already humiliating enough to stand before him after plummeting into his side when first arriving to this destination, to then making a fool of yourself sleeping in front of him to also awaken to ruin all ounce of potential conversation you could have had. Preparing yourself for the worst, you wince, wishing you could slip under the covers of your bedroom to hide away forever. “What about you? Are you attending University here, too?”

“I- erm, about that-” There is not a way for you to explain, because there isn’t much to say other than your heart belonged to another career path. “I received a job offer here. One that I thought would provide good benefits than my original plan, but it’s not what I expected,” Namjoon’s eyebrows furrow igniting a surge in frantic slews of sentences from your mouth, “I mean, I love it. I really do, it’s- it’s what I love to do, but I guess- I want- I want more from it. But I don’t know how to- I-” Warm chuckles leave his lips that halts your rambling in a heartbeat, “I talk way too much, I’m sorry-”

“You’re not talking too much. You’re fine, I promise.” a brief spark settles a reminder of your budding attraction toward him that your chest heats with a dark hue of red; your arms slide to cross over your chest in an attempt at hugging yourself- timorously beaming up at him to search his tender gaze. “You know, if you’re up for it, there’s a restaurant not too far from here that has the best pasta I’ve ever had,” Namjoon’s fingers disappear into the pockets of his jeans- nervously rocking on his heels because after all these years he never thought he would run into anyone he once acquainted with in his younger days, but here you are, standing before him in all your glory. You were someone he admired from afar who treated him as though he was part of the team versus an outcast as others preferred him to be. But you were different. You never saw anyone as below you, and though the pair of you never blossomed into a friendship, you at least treated him with kindness despite the rumors pupils whispered in the foyers. “I already planned on going there today actually-”

“I’d love to!” Your fingertips shut your lips from the excitement you didn’t mean to interrupt him with, “I mean, I uh, I’d- I’d like that very much, thank you,”

It’s strange how the imagination of a world can seem so real, and the awareness of how close he is bringing flutters of butterflies within your stomach while your ears tune in to the scuffling sounds of your footsteps prodding along the route. No matter how hard you contemplate, whatever vision you had at the lake isn’t coming to you, but the consistent feeling that you’re experiencing brings the suspicion that whatever you dreamt is now becoming a reality. 

 The air is calmed in a manner that reflects a pleasant silence where your focus happens to remain on the cold mush of fibrous moss gathering between your fingers. Eyes are closed momentarily yet the hint of the sun is evident, but the source of your confusion isn’t from the odd wonder of why your hands are gripping the earth, instead, it is for the question of why your back is pressed to the ground as though you have fallen into slumber.

Blinking open to the blue of the sky, you are paused for only a mere moment to discover this time, sparse altocumulus clouds entering your vision enough to ease yourself to sit up. Freeing your digits from what you see to be a deep shade of magenta mingled with numerous hues of green festooning across the land, it is astonishing the beauty your vision is encountering prompting you to whirl your head in every direction to take in the glacier gray of the mountains you observe to be cratering a lapis glow of a lake.

The familiarity of a reminiscent involving a body of water decides to accompany your mind, but the difference between your memory of what you assume regards to reality, is that what you are gazing upon now, is nothing but magical. In wondrous awe, you find yourself standing, taking a slow bare foot forward, just to be halted when the feel of something is settled around your head. Furrowed eyebrows, you lightly tap along what feels to be numerous twigs tangled together with stems of bloomed petals. You raise your other hand to retrieve the item, glance widening at the myriad of dancing colors in the form of flowers embellishing what looks to be what one would call a crown.

Has it been there all along?

An inkling to turn around urges you to do so, lips parted in a gasp though not one sound escapes. He stands before you, the man from a preceding ponder, dressed in white, angelically beaming from head to toe, imitating the enchanting resonation of the atmosphere, causing you to long for whatever bliss he has within his touch. Did he give this to you?

Tenderly, he reaches to place his fingertips beneath the flower crown where your heart leaps at the faint brush of his skin. Lifting it ever so steadily, he returns to set the emblem where it belongs, to the empress of his heart, of his universe, completing you in all entirety. Your eyes flicker between his in suppressed doubt; is this real? You are so enveloped in the amiability of his gape, your palms extend to fold along his shoulders, leading his hand to rest at the side of your neck. He is reading your soul as much as you are trying to decipher his, but there is a connection that no other will ever be able to gain from you as much as him.

The nearness of him is what you are now in concentration of, leaning closer, waiting for what you are hoping for-

-

Namjoon’s long frame slides upon the plaid picnic blanket, abdomen first, while he folds his arms to where he rests his cheek, “I’m feeling the weight of that essay from last night,”

“And, you still turned it in late,” you tease, munching on a snack while he throws a playful side glance. It’s been a month since the reuniting, and the friendship has become exactly what you have been needing. Unfortunately, finances have still been a heavy burden, but at least you have found an ally in Gyeongju who is just as excited to see you as you are him.

“I mean I was pretty distracted,”

Scoffing, you smack his shoulder lightly with the back of your hand, “That video of that kitten was so cute, and you know it,”

“I never said it wasn’t cute,” the way his lips break into the widest smile, his eyes squinting in the way they do that then reveals his dimples; as much as you’d like to deny the way your heart feels a sense of longing, you mask it quite effortlessly.

“You literally giggled so much, I thought you were going to pee,” breathy laughter escapes him prompting him to bury his head into his arms, your gaze never leaving his shaking shoulders. “Well, it’s true!” Moments such as these bring a joy you are thankful exists, but little does Namjoon know, or so you assume, that once you step into your apartment to be reminded of how little you have moneywise, the depression seeps in. It is hard enough to work every day as hard as you do, just to watch your paycheck subtract away right before your eyes with each bill. It is something you haven’t necessarily opened about, because you just don’t know how. And, the last thing you need is for someone to offer help that you know they may not have.

“That’s only happened one time!” He exclaims, him shifting to lean more on his side so he can peer up at you. This area particularly is further within the park where there are not as many trees, which gives enough space to lay out a blanket and view the scenery. Sunshine brightens the atmosphere as well as warming your skin, and though you’re continuing to cackle with Namjoon, you slide until you are upon your back, using your arm to shade some of the sunlight. One perk regarding the park is it’s free, which is why you always ask to come here when hanging out, and you refuse to let Namjoon pay a dime for anything, not even a candy bar.

The nearness of his body does not heighten your senses until you turn to look at him, and that’s when you melt wishing nothing more than to kiss him. Which explains the dreams you’ve been having lately. Laughter has ceased for the time being, instead the conversation moves into a different subject, one you hoped wouldn’t happen, but considering your avoidance of going to many places, and the embarrassment of Namjoon seeing the emptiness of your kitchen one too many times, the paranoia of him catching on to why you have been slightly more stressed than usual may enter his suspicions.

“Have you been okay?” By the tone of his voice, you can tell right away he is aware of something. But, how can you tell him you are fine, when you are nowhere near one hundred percent. You definitely feel that way when with him, because he makes you forget about the reality at home, but gives you a time to escape, a time to embrace the joy he provides you every chance he gets. Should you tell him the truth? “[Y/N], I never mentioned this before just because I figured it was just coincidence, but when was the last time you’ve gotten groceries? Like, actual groceries,”

“Ramen is groceries,”

“I-” Namjoon pauses, “What I mean is, more than just ramen noodle cups and stale chips,”

“Maybe that’s how I like my chips. Corny and stale,”

“That sounds-”

“Listen,” you lift an index finger, “if vegetables and fruits would last longer than a week, I totally wouldn’t feel like I’m wasting money.”

“You know if you need anything, I’m here for you,” his words nearly bring you to tears, leading you to turn your head in the opposite direction to avoid his concerned expression. He knows you are making excuses at this point and of course, he is not entirely sure of why, but he may be able to guess correctly if he tried.

“I don’t need anything, I promise I’m fine,” your reply is soft, but loud enough for him to hear. Though you can’t see it, Namjoon’s eyebrows furrow, him picking at his fingertips while in deep concentration. He is learning that you, stubbornly, are most definitely not going to let him help in any way, but unbeknownst to you, is that he will stop at nothing to make sure you are okay no matter what.

“Look at me,” your heart skips a beat immediately when you slowly return to where he is within your glimpse, his thumb reaching to brush your bottom lip where he inches much closer than you anticipated. All you know, is that if he reads every word that your mind is screaming, your heart may burst out of your chest. Yearning for his kiss, he is close enough to where his breath sweeps your chin, “[Y/N], really, if there is anything at all that you absolutely need, please know I will do anything for you,”

Your fingers bundle into the collar of his shirt absentmindedly, letting his forehead press upon yours before you dare to close the gap you are so anxiously wanting to do. His thumb now strokes your cheek, tickling your skin to the point you feel breathless.

“I don’t know what to say,” you whisper, a hushed tear dropping onto your cheek before he swipes it away.

“I just want you to be okay,”

“I am,” you try your best to sound reassuring, “Joon, I promise you I am,”

“Okay,” he whispers, and even then, you have no idea the best that is yet to come.

-

Sleeping cherry blossoms encircle you save for the entrance of a tunnel gleaming piercingly bright in the distance that seems so close yet so far out of reach. The iridescent shades of the petals glitter in preparation for what is to come, but your focus solely remains on the escape ahead into a world you have always dreamed of. Or is this the world you have always dreamed of? Scents of the florets waft past your nose in a way to ease you, and the lingering thought of the man clothed in white shadows the crevices of your conscious. Just the mere reminisce of him prompts his appearance and as he stands behind you in all his glory, he knows the desire looming beneath your chest for the magic you crave.

His arms reach to link around you, chin nestling on your shoulder; there is no fear for he is the only being welcome in your world of serenity. Your hands smooth upon his folded arms that remain resting against your abdomen, and forever seems to be in the forefront of your mind. Spinning within his embrace, a subtle smirk graces his mouth while your hands glide to his chest, and finally after many dreams of pining, he leans in to close the gap- snatching your lips as softly as you have imagined causing the closed petals all around the pair of you to bloom endlessly, flourishing every ounce of space the two of you may have had a fraction before. The power is within his kiss, summoning the blossoms to awaken as they are meant to. The same as he is meant to be with you.

-

 “I miss you, too, Mom,” you smile into the phone, sifting through the mail you just checked, eyebrows furrowing when you feel as though something is missing. “Yeah- yeah, I have, I mean, yes mom, I may have a boyfriend,” you giggle, shaking your head at your persistent mother who has been dying to catch up with you since you moved. “I think- yeah, I think he may be who I’ve been waiting for,” when a knock at the door alerts you, you quickly bid your mom a farewell with the promise of calling her back tomorrow before you start work again.

Staring at the pile of mail, you wonder why the utility bill has not been sent. It is around the time that it should have arrived meaning you may need to take a short trip to the leasing office if Namjoon doesn’t mind. Giddily, you skip to look through the peephole to see him, standing tall with his slim fingers slipped into his pockets. Unlocking the door, you run a swift hand through your hair in an attempt to neaten the strands before opening the entrance. “Hey!” You breathe, gesturing for him to come in, and when the door closes, you leap into his embrace before smiling into a sweet kiss.

“Are you ready for today? The weather is beautiful out,”

“Beyond ready,” you kiss him again. The anticipation to explore another location involving nature is what you enjoy especially with someone who equally enjoys it as much as you. “But I must make a quick trip to the leasing office if that’s okay? I have Netflix if you want to chill for a bit- it shouldn’t take too long.”

Namjoon chuckles, leaning in to press a slow kiss to your lips, “Everything okay?”

“Mm yeah,” you reply in a daze, “I just haven’t received my utility bill yet and I’m concerned. Can you um, can you do that again? I may need the extra umph,”

Breathy laughter is interrupted when he kisses you again, and it takes everything in you to pull away, “Okay, I feel better now,”

“Good. Whatever it takes,”

As much as you would love to not have to pay any bills, you saunter across the road to where the leasing office lives, encompassed by sparse trees and a small swimming pool off to the side. You are happy to see Jung Hoseok, leaned on his desk, spectacles slid down his nose, and gaze distracted by whatever he is reading on the computer screen.

“Good morning,” you greet, Hoseok immediately looks to see who has walked in, gesturing with a smile toward a seat in front of his desk.

“How can I help you today?”

“Yes, um, I just went through my mail today and I realized I hadn’t received the utility bill for this month, so I wanted to check to make sure I didn’t miss anything,”

“Ah, yes, let me pull up your account here,” his fingers fly over the keyboard, the clicking noise being the only sound filling the space. “Hm, looks like it’s already been paid for.”

“Excuse me?” Confusion is evident within your voice as well as plastered upon your entire expression. “When did I? I paid it?”

“Mhm, as well as your rent for the rest of the year among all of your other bills. There’s enough money on your account to just automatically draft-”

“But I didn’t-”

“Well it says it right here,” he pokes the screen once.

“Are you able to see when the money was put in? I have no idea how-” The realization hits you suddenly prompting a small gasp.

“Er, is everything okay, Ms. [Y/N]?”

“Yeah,” you say quite breathlessly, gradually standing to your feet, the world spinning faster than you could have prepared for.

“I mean, I can ask my coworker, Taehyung if he knows anything. I got back from vacation today, so I may not have the answer for you-”

“No, no it’s okay. I- I think I know who is responsible. Thank you so much, Hoseok.”

“Anytime, dear!”

Being slightly dizzy while running is an interesting combo, but you make it to your apartment without tripping over your own two feet and you stand before the door, your chest heaving. The dreams you have been having- it all makes sense now. You wanted nothing more than a reason, or a miracle, to feel as if you were home, or where you belonged, and finally, it was given to you in the most unexpected way. When you came to Gyeongju, you had no idea that Namjoon would show up in your life and turn it into the most beautiful adventure you have ever had. You were willing to suffer through the bills if it meant being close to him, and how he figured out your hardship, you are uncertain- you always avoided the subject when it came to hardly having any money. Slowly stepping into your apartment, you click the door closed, Namjoon’s focus turning from the tv to you as he rises to his feet. You are speechless as you gaze at the man of your dreams. When he said he would do anything for you, you never imagined this.

“Whatever it takes?” You croak, hardly sure even now what to say. Namjoon will do anything to make you happy, and that is how you knew after getting to know him the past few months that you were wholeheartedly in love with him. You will spend the rest of your life trying to thank him no matter the circumstances, and as soon as his frame entangles with yours, he whispers,

“Whatever it takes.”

With all the emotion displayed from you, you drag his mouth to yours while his arms embrace you closely and warmly. His lips move so beautifully with yours that it’s mesmerizing and you feel your body fall into him. Giving him your all. You reach to unbutton his shirt, still lip locked and the way he over towers you igniting the feelings stirring even more. His lips tenderly trace your jaw while you slip off his garment and you are so entranced by him that you don’t even hear it brush the floor.

“We’re going to be late,” he whispers a tease to your mouth with a knowing smirk while you gaze at him seductively.

“I. Don’t. Care.” You say slowly and softly, slipping out of your shirt just to watch the lust fill his eyes. The way your bra cups your breasts, he can’t look away. The beauty of you and your heart- you are the most amazing human being he has ever known. Throwing an arm behind his neck, you bring him to your lips until every article of clothing is scattered among the floors. Eventually the pair of you find the bedroom where his hands gracefully slide over your body. His warm skin feels so good upon yours.

His fingers slide to your clit, delicately rubbing small circles, basking in your moans as your heat gushes. Your fingers grip his strands when he dips from your kiss to your breasts, sucking on your nipples while the tip of his tongue flicks along them, giving time to worship both. When he sees the effect it has on you, his fingers slip inside you, pumping while you moan his name. He wants you so badly, he can hardly stand it, especially with how wet you are for him.

You have no idea how much time has passed, but the moment you finish for him, he enters you, thrusting rhythmically and your moans increase like music to his ears. You could stay enveloped in his arms forever. You adore how your bodies mold together so effortlessly. When his climax is reached, you are not in any rush despite the original plans. After what he has done for you, your heaven can just be wrapped in his arms. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead, another moment you will always cling to. “I love you.” He whispers. He didn’t even have to say it. His actions whether it’s in dreams or reality are enough to know that your heart is safe.

Pairing: artist!seokjin x retail!reader, s2l!au

Pastel. Although daylight, the sun is nowhere to be as you spin, soaking in every view of the dull colors amongst the vacant field. Pinks, grays, purples and subtle yellows decorate the swaying meadow along with the sky; not a tree is present before you. The urge to run freely with the warm breeze causes you to spread your arms like a statue, your hair wistfully flowing behind your shoulders as the speed of the wind picks up. Gleefully, you skip along the land, the long pieces of grass brushing your elbows as exuberant laughter escapes your lips.

Freedom. This is what freedom feels like as you run with the air, absorbing every speck of nature you can beneath the pallid heavens. When forever seems to shorten, something in the distance stops you in your tracks. A couch. A couch adorned with a light brown blanket and a neutral, blue blanket sit in the middle of the space; the wind breezing at the hems revealing multiple trinkets such as a basket with a slice from a log nestled beside it; and, a glass bottle glistening as if the sun has decided to make an appearance. As your eyes observe the scene with parted lips, you notice a pair of books stacked with a lantern resting on top; more scattered items are noted as your eyes notice the pastel décor of round ornaments resting upon the couch.

It doesn’t stop there. The strangeness of the discovery overwhelms you, especially when your gaze lands on the back of a gray suit jacket. Broad shoulders lead to neatly shaved yet ruffled blonde hair, his head poised in the direction of what you notice as an open book between his long fingers. He doesn’t move; his bare legs from his gray shorts remain planted before him; his navy socks stop a few inches below his knees complimenting a pair of black, pointed shoes revealing a third blanket beneath them.

Wonder.

The question of who he is nips at you; and before you say a word, you step forward, the snapping of a twig causes him to jolt, turning his head to the left, about to expose-

-

The ding of the bell alerts that another customer has entered the store, awaking you from your thoughts as you focus on tapping along the keys of the cash register. The elderly woman gives a small smile once you hand her the change owed along with the bag of knickknacks she purchased. Returning the grin, she waves goodbye and the earlier reminder of the dream you had returns to you.

“What a strange dream,” you murmur, leaving the register for a moment to tour the small store. Your red apron rests around your waist, your white t-shirt tucked in your blue jeans as the faint squeak of your sneakers echo against the tile floor. Dainty kitchenware poses neatly along the shelves as well as numerous packages of colored silverware which brings a satisfying grin to your lips. Thankfully, customers who come into the store are respectful enough to leave items be, leaving less work for you to have to tidy up. Mini, wooden, carved figurines align another section; fake flowers decorate the rest of the aisle along with different paintings given to the shop by aspiring artists.

Cards of endearment, treasured keeps, housewarming gifts, and stuffed animals fill the rest of the building bringing an elegant feel to the atmosphere. Once your shift is over; you say a quick goodbye to your boss, driving home reminiscing on the dream you ponder could have a deeper meaning.

-

The hum of a bumblebee zips past your ear as the wind blows against your pale, yellow dress; strands of your hair tickle the back of your shoulders as your eyes remain locked in front of you. There isn’t a sun, but cumulus clouds cover nearly every inch of the monotone, blue sky blanketing the earth encompassing you. Long blades of grass wisp against your legs, the ticklish feel reminding you of the inclination to run freely through the landscape.

When you make the step to move forward, your feet don’t budge. In fact, the only thing moving is your hair with the breeze, not even a sound is uttered from your lips. Confusion filling you, your gaze falls upon a dim blue balloon, simply floating a few feet away, yet high enough to be out of reach. It just sits there, no movement- merely hovering above the ground, reflecting the stillness you seem to be afflicted with.

Beyond the field, the familiar figure of the blonde man enters your line of vision. This time he’s pacing, eyes glued to the book in his hands. For some reason, you do not want him to discover you, especially with the sting of embarrassment threatening to overwhelm your entire being. You can’t help yourself though as you observe the sharpness of his chin, the way his eyebrows furrow as he focuses on the words he’s reading, his thick lips whispering words you wish to hear, his toned frame along with the broadness of his shoulders peaks a delicate attraction within your chest.

The fear of him seeing you interrupts you from your stare when the reappearance of the humming bumblebee disperses your trance. With wide eyes, you try with all your might to run, but your body remains frozen at the hands of your imagination. Eyes trained on the yellow and black stripes of the insect, it flutters to the balloon, your blood running cold against the warmth of the wind. The bee lands gracefully on the balloon, taking a feel of it before sinking its stinger into the inflated material.

The loud pop pains your ears, and before you can calm yourself, you see the book fly from the man’s hands, his wide eyes finding yours before-

-

Sweat droplets align your forehead as the pace of your heart slows. How the fear of the man finding you took an apparent toll- it is something you don’t quite understand considering what you have awoken from was just a dream. Shaking your head, you ready for the day, throwing on your uniform and driving to your job. Once arrived, the ding of the bell notifies your manager that you have arrived, and you quickly clock in, checking on the store before customers come bustling in.

Of course, everything has remained tidy since your previous shift, so you boringly scope the aisles pausing when your eyes fall upon one of the paintings showcased on the rack. To your surprise, it’s a painting of a bumblebee. It appears to be in the process of pollination, the pastel pink of the flower petals blends in beautifully with the dark green stem making the yellow of the bee glow.

“Wow,” you breathe, running your fingertips over the smooth surface of the wings admiring the detail the artist created as the dream from last night remains subconsciously. Beside the painting, an eerie feeling overwhelms you as you gaze at a painted pale blue balloon- the string attached is nestled in the hand of a small child; the black hair on the boy’s head covers his forehead, as his other hand is tucked in his gray short’s pocket. He stands in the street of a city it appears, the pastel colors of the sky showing no sun.

 “Hey, Monnie?” You call, figuring these paintings appeared in your dreams for the mere reason that you see them every day. But, how come you never truly noticed them until now?

“Yeah?” Her voice echoes from the back room where she’s finishing up a carved figurine of a tiger.

“Who is the main artist you said brings their paintings?” You wonder, your eyes never leaving the beautiful masterpiece.

“Uuuuuhhm,” she bellows in concentration, “I think his name is-”

The doorbell of the store signals that a customer or two has walked in, and the question ends up forgotten as you greet them with a wide smile.

-

The view before you captivates you in a different way, especially with the immense amount of land surrounding the balcony you find yourself on. Thick, white railing rests against your chest as your arms fold in front of you. The infamous wind sways your white dress as well as your hair as a dazed smile forms on your lips. You have no idea where you are, and with the way the pastel shades of the sky enchant you, it’s like you never want to wake up.

Trees are still not present, just the never-ending meadow you’ve once enjoyed running in. As you stand in awe, a presence melts into your back as large hands rest on either side of your elbows. Heartbeat quickening, you turn to face the presence revealing the blonde man, your back pressing against the railing. His face is so close the tip of his nose brushes yours. Before fear overtakes you, the tenderness in his brown eyes sets you at ease especially when the yearning to run your fingertips along the sleeves of his gray suit jacket nearly knocks the breath out of you.

He inches closer, your hands resting on his chest as your parted lips crave the touch of his. How a dream can spark such desire is beyond you, especially if this was a reality, you couldn’t imagine yourself being so infatuated with a stranger. A very handsome stranger. Before the moment can be lost, you close the tempting gap between the two of you, his lips brushing yours ever so softly. As he moves his lips with yours slowly, the sound of numerous crashing leaves fill the air as well as the heat of a rising sunray warms your back causing you to break the kiss with furrowed eyebrows. When you return your eyes to meet his, a knowing grin fills his features which leads you turning deliberately, a surprise gasp leaving your lips.

He’s the sun that makes the trees appear.

-

Weeks pass with not one dream of the entrancing chocolate eyes that somehow have grasped every capacity of your brain cells. You didn’t dare tell a soul of the blonde stranger in fear of someone saying that you’re crazy. Although, you feel as though your boss and friend Monnie may understand. She’s mentioned dreams before, one that led her to who she is with now. Jungkook waltzes in with a wide smile, his pink hair covering the tips of his ears and forehead, a small paper bag folded with the name of Monnie’s favorite coffee shop labeled in the center. In his other hand, lies a bouquet of her favorite flowers, the deep green of the stems causes the color of the flower petals to shine beneath the lights in the shop.

Monnie greets him with a quick hug and kiss, her smile wide as she thanks him. With quick ‘I love you’s,’ Jungkook steals one more kiss before he leaves the store, the dinging bell fading once the door closes. Monnie returns to her task at hand, and the moment that you just observed brings the loving feeling you felt with the last dream you had of the mysterious blonde man. His kiss felt so real, and without realizing, your fingertips rest on your lips as if the experience had been just that. Real.

Snapping out of your unrealistic hopes, you turn on a heel back to the register to check out a waiting customer- letting the thought of the blonde man disappear just like the thought of hoping in someone that doesn’t exist.

-

The field appears around you as it has many times before. You bask in the dim light, the colors remaining dull as you observe the swinging grass. Without warning, countless, pale blue balloons hover above you, in front of you, behind you- encircling you like a forest. Raising your fingertips, you touch an inflated material, the balloon drifting away from you to be out of reach. Disappointment fills you for you cannot ignore the sudden want to catch a balloon for yourself. You jog toward as many as you can, all of them floating away from you the second you reach for their strings.

Suddenly, the sun shines brightening the colors into glistening hues, and with the flying feeling of your soul, you turn to see him. Shimmering blonde hair tousled neatly on his forehead, hands tucked in the pockets of his shorts, he stands like a prince, an affectionate grin on his pink lips. You find it odd, but you have missed his company despite him being fiction, and with a jubilant smile, your eyes never leave his. The blonde man approaches you, turning his head to the side, he reaches for the string of a stray balloon, and once he closes the distance between you both, he ties the string of the balloon to your wrist, bringing your fingers to his lips as he plants tender kisses among them.

You place your palm on his cheek, the soft skin soothing as he leans more into your hand. Even with the scenery abundant around you, all you can see is him. With elegance, he moves his arms around your waist as he rests his forehead against yours. When his lips steal you, the leaves of the trees clash, reminding you of the power his presence holds. As your fingers trace the curve of his chin, you feel as though you’re floating, just like the balloons bordering the both of you amongst the sunshine and trees.

-

Once you rid the line of customers, the store becomes empty and you take the opportunity to gather yourself, tucking loose strands of hair behind your ears as well as straightening your red apron. Five minutes past, and you take a swig from your water bottle, swishing it in your mouth before swallowing. Twisting the lid back on, you set the bottle in the cubby underneath the register, too unmotivated to take a tour around the store.

When the ding of the bell alerts you, your eyes trail to see blonde hair. A pang hits your heart as your eyes widen, your heartbeat thudding in your temples as your mouth goes dry. No way. You watch the broad shoulders dressed in a black suit jacket turn to face you and your breath hitches in your throat.

“Hello, I’m here to see if Monnie is in need of some more paint-” He pauses suddenly, and you hope with every fiber of your being that he doesn’t observe the blush creeping onto your cheeks. Eyeing you curiously, his lips parted, he speaks, “Hey, you look- you look familiar. Do I.. know you?”

You notice the pink bow tie with a flower in the center nestled around his neck over a white dress shirt which compliments white pants covering his long legs. It takes you a moment before you realize he’s waiting for you to speak.

“Oh, um, I-” you stammer, “I’m [Y/N].” You offer your hand immediately.

“Seokjin,” He replies, his large hand accepting yours with a few shakes. An awkward moment passes as you observe his expression- he’s trying desperately to figure out where he has seen you before, and not being able to bear the awkward tension any longer, you decide to break it,

“I’m not sure if we know each other, but I think I’d like to,” you could have bitten your tongue off at your precipitous exclaim. But relief drowns you when his lips pull into a kind grin.

“I think I’d like that,” he says, “I think I’d like that very much.”

Pairing: bestfriend!jimin x collegestudent!reader, f2l!au, college!au (18+)

Tapping the end of your pencil upon any form of a desk is a habit you have vowed countless times to break, yet with your focus solely upon the daydream spinning like a pinwheel, you hardly notice the coffee eyes peering over at you. “Hey,” the jab of a pointy elbow disrupts you enough, lightly jumping at the gesture just to find your attention returning to the monotone voice of the professor. To make sure the coast is clear, you then veer your gaze to see a concerned Jimin- orange strands glisten beneath the long, rectangular lights tickling the lateral canthus’ of his eyes, and you feel an overwhelming sensation of longing, but you refuse to make it known. “Are you okay?” He mouths, leaned comfortably in his seat; you rest your chin firmly in your palm as you hold his stare.

“Yeah,” you promise, almost dazed, nodding in confirmation. It takes absolutely no effort when the minute class ends, you scramble to scoop up your textbooks, exiting the room with your best friend by your side. Picnic tables are sparse along the campus, and finding one empty, the pair of you occupy it for a few minutes before going your separate ways to the next class.

“You must be out of it,” Jimin observes, breaking the brief silence before you turn to dig into your backpack for a granola bar you have not been able to stop thinking about. Peeling off the wrapper swiftly, you offer him a piece of the snack, him lifting a quick hand gesture in rejection.

“I was up late last night,” you admit, breaking off some of the bar and popping it in your mouth.

“Please tell me you didn’t turn in the music paper late-”

“I sure did,” you chuckle at the way Jimin shakes his head at you, though the way his plump lips break out into his infamous smile, your heart skips a beat as it always does, because how can someone be so beautiful? He runs a slow hand through his hair while his eyes move to watch the surroundings,

“You live dangerously I’ll give you that. I can’t survive unless I’ve had a solid eight hours of beauty sleep.”

“No wonder why you’re so flawless,” you muse, him abruptly shifting to look at you once more, snickering in disbelief at your comment.

“Don’t lie to me,” he kids, gradually standing to his feet before he throws his arms up to stretch them; Jimin lets out a long yawn, “I think I’m going to go check on Yoongi. He’s been missing Mo a lot lately, so I’m going to keep him company. Catch you tomorrow?”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Smiling, you are almost caught off guard from where he gently squeezes your shoulder, and the inward wish for him to stay envelops your senses much more than you want to confess, but you understand his wanting to go check on a friend who may need him. Plus, you understand how Yoongi feels because missing someone can be consuming and that is something you are remarkably familiar with.

Turning on a heel, Jimin treads to the sidewalk that leads to where his dorm room awaits, only making it halfway up the sidewalk, he spins to face you, stepping backward with a large smile he bellows, “Your birthday is coming up by the way. I know you’re not a fan of it, but you’ll have to get over it!”

“I won’t!” You lean to your side to get a better view of him, voices carrying in the light breeze.

“We’ll see,” he winks before jogging further into the distance leaving your fluttering heart in anticipation for what he has up his sleeve.

-

Palms along with the slight bend of your fingers clear within your vision, and your breaths slow in a strange wonder of why you are where you are. Bare feet planted along the cold, dark mush, yet there is no color to be noticed other than black and white, and you twirl your hands in awe of the dull gray painted upon your skin. Rattling trees are enhanced from the way your senses have heightened, and sporadic rumbles from the earth seem to emit in unison with flashes clouding your peripherals. The long grass of the field encompassing your frame sways, and whatever lingering shadows fade into the distance, you hardly notice anything other than that something is missing.

It does not rain, rather, lightning makes an appearance as if to signal the arrival of something… or someone. Furrowed eyebrows, you gather beyond the land a silhouette completely adorned with colors you have not been acquainted with, and as the figure no longer remains blurry, your heartbeat quickens at the sight. You watch him as he dances, leaving traces of color in his wake- every inch being shaded in behind him, completing the picture as if created just for you.

His arms are outspread, and within one of his hands holds a bubble blower which decorates the atmosphere, and upon instinct, floating bubbles hover to where you are; a giggle escaping your lips at the mere touch of one popping. Carroty tendrils gleam beneath the glowing yellow of what you see to be the sun, no sign of gray to be seen now that this soul has arrived. When he notices you, there is a halt- all is silenced, and even from what appears to be a short pace to be where he is, you have never been so fixated on the brown orbs that seem to reflect the same interest.

The two of you step to be nearer to one another, and for some reason, a nostalgia slithers its way to you exposing the urge to confess an undying secret, and as if he reads your mind, you raise your palm, him following suit before your hands press together simultaneously. Your gaze flickers to watch the way the pair of your fingers intertwine, goosebumps pleasantly spreading over your limbs, but what really captures your attention, is when you mouth,

“I need to tell you something,” because he mirrors the exact words you just whispered. His lips part as do yours, investigating each other’s gapes deeply. “I-I need to tell you something,” you repeat just to realize he is reflecting every movement you make. Stepping backward in shock, you frantically say it over and over again, “I need to tell you something. I-I need to tell you something!”

-

“Tell me what?” Jimin’s voice breaks through what happens to be a dream prompting you to gasp as you jolt up, pulling the covers tight to your chest. Your breathing calms as you flash a suspicious look at your amused friend, playfully reaching to shove his shoulder while the drowsiness from your slumber gradually dissipates.

“What in tarnation are you doing in my room? And, who said I had anything to tell you?”

“Listen,” Jimin chortles. “You have been talking in your sleep the past five minutes, and if I’m not mistaken, you have an urgent message to deliver to somebody.”

Scoffing jokingly, you roll your eyes, “It was just a dream. Now, get out. I need to get ready.”

Obeying, Jimin’s snickering at you as you wisp past him to prepare for your day ahead. Straightening your hair, brushing your teeth- twice, and caking on deodorant- you meet him out in the hallway, the two of you heading to your first class of the day. Little does he know, his presence always makes the pace of your heart quicken, and this is not the first time he has woken you up from sleeping. Of course, the subtle desire to wake up to him every morning huddles in the back of your mind. And as you ponder the dream you have awoken from, is it possible that Jimin has something to tell you, too? Or is it simply just a hopeless wish?

“And, Happy Birthday by the way,” Jimin’s steps slow just enough for you to notice the comical way he smirks at you.

“Don’t remind me,” you blow at a piece of stray hair that falls into your vision.

“Too late,” Stopping fully, you are astonished when his strong arms pull you into a tight embrace that the faint smell of his cologne reaches your nostrils. “It’s your birthday, and you are worth celebrating.”

“Says who,” your voice is muffled against his warm chest, your body easing into him before tightening your arms behind his back when you gently rock from side to side.

“Says me,” he cuddles you much closer, pressing his nose into your shoulder, and the way complete peace waves like an ocean over your heart, it feels indescribable, almost heavenly. But, does he feel the same, too?

“You’re going to make us late,” you murmur, although a tease, you honestly wouldn’t mind being late to class if it means being enveloped in his arms, but of course, reality hits, and he saunters behind you into the classroom when you finally find the will to pull away. If only the daunting questions didn’t produce fear, then maybe you would have admitted your feelings by now, or so you assume, but is heartbreak a risk you are willing to take?

When you reach your desk, coming down from the dazed high of Jimin’s hug, a soft gasp erupts past your parted lips, eyes widening in surprise. “You’rrre welcome,” Jimin leans into your shoulder, his smile so wide that his eyes disappear, and if you could kiss him, you would do it right now even as students start filing in to take their seats.

Sitting right at your desk enclosed in a plastic case appears to be a yellow frosted cupcake with rainbow sprinkles decorated on top. And all you can fathom is this- is this all a coincidence? Or do your dreams about Jimin have a deeper meaning that you are in denial about? Either way, you know you can’t hide your feelings forever. And as you settle into your chair, a few minutes before class is to begin, you bask in the glory of his voice as he speaks, longing for the day you can work up the courage to tell him how you truly feel.

-

In the middle of the meadow you stand, all hues washed away into the gloom of loneliness, yet the prickles of grass nicks your ankles, reminding you of the trees standing lifeless in the sense of no movement, hardly a sound is created. The fabric of a dress is clung between your fingers, the material scrunched in your palms, yet you loosen them upon realization that you are nowhere amid harm. Toes curl to feel the cold pad of the earth, but the air is stilled, calmed in silence, yet temperate enough to maintain comfort. You turn in time to notice a table, not far into the distance, eyeing what looks to be a small cupcake centered without anything else surrounding it.

Curiously, your slow footprints crunch the grass toward the strange discovery, and the thought of sinking your teeth into the soft dessert makes your mouth water in excitement. The crave is so strong, you wonder of the significance behind the treat, and colliding with the fossils of your memory, you cannot seem to find a reason; sprinkles sporadically embellish the swirled icing prompting you to swipe an index finger through to taste the delightful sweet of sugar now melting on your tongue. Closing your eyes, your intention is to reach for more frosting, and upon re-opening them, bewilderment overcomes you at the sight of colors blooming on every horizon, painting along to even reveal the deep mahogany of the table. Tilting your head, you notice something is missing, and unexpectedly, the blur of clementine strands enters your peripherals causing you to whip your vision to see the man you have met in prior slumbers, mischievously grinning at you.

Squinting at him in response, a mere smirk arises on your lips, wondering what he has in store, but he is not the only one who has a trick or two hidden away in his sleeves. Trailing down from his expression, you see that in his hands lays the cupcake, the wip of yellow frosting you pilfered evident from its once perfected layer. Wind happens to miraculously exist when you hear the subtle rattle of leaves, your hair tickling the backs of your shoulders where the tinge of sunrays are felt, and you find it endearing that when he is present, so is the world you truly seek.

He gestures the dessert to you, and instead of taking another bite, you catch him by surprise when you return the baked good to the table. Watching you carefully, the spark of another desire looms along your mind where your arms raise for your hands to place gently on his shoulders. Brown irises flicker to read your expression, and when he prepares to lean in, tip of his nose daintily brushing yours- you suddenly jolt, laughter reverberating throughout the atmosphere when he widens his eyes before leaning back to release the same boisterous sound, your running frame igniting him to follow suit. He chases after you playfully as you cavort through the land, sneaking glimpses behind you to see how close he is. He never misses a step, arms outreached to catch you panging frequent squeals of glee to escape from your smiling lips, but he misses every time as you dodge into the opposite direction, he least expected. A short time passes underneath the fervor of the sunlight resonating amongst the scene, the light of it all serenading the pair of you into a wonderland you never imagined would welcome you with such happiness.

When he manages to round his arms around your frame, your feet fly out from under you causing the two of you to tumble- rolling together down a lush hill until the pace slows. He hovers above you, each of your chests rising and falling with the same exhilaration before bursting into the same merriment that gifted the surroundings with joy. The tips of his feathery, orange hair tickles your forehead from how near his proximity is, and his expression softens in the hopes of continuing where it was originally left off. When he leans in, without warning, with what strength you have, you turn to pin him down, giggling at his startled, yet amused glance. His smile is the most beautiful smile you have ever known, him shaking his head at you for accomplishing the trickery he had not seen coming.

Gazing down at him, your hair falls from your shoulders to lightly touch the sides of his face, and you feel the comfort of his hands nestle on your back. Your fingertips glide to hold his face, his dancing eyes lighting your heart- everything about him finalizes you in every aspect- the missing puzzle piece you have longed for- the sunshine to your rainy day. And, no matter what, you will never look away.

Bubbles swarm the universe in a glistening cascade when your lips finally meet, creating the power of what the two of you hold for each other, and one thing rings mesmerizingly clear:

He is the rainbow that conquers every storm.

-

One thing you contemplated from the moment your eyes fluttered open to the gold tinged spin of your ceiling fan was whether you were going to refuse to move until the anxious weight over your shoulders disappears, or get your ass out of bed and finally tell Jimin how you feel. Now, the answer to the hounding question happens to be blatantly clear because in front of the door, you stand, heart profusely thumping. The door that your best friend, unbeknownst of your arrival, lives behind stares back at you as if it is laughing, taunting you to make up your mind. Mumbling profanities to yourself in frustration, you lightly pace from side to side, scolding yourself while you nip at your fingernails, begging inwardly to get a grip.

Uncertain of how many minutes faded into time, you shake your head, pausing to inhale deeply and exhale slowly, slamming your eyes shut as you try to steady your quivering hands. Feet planting in front of the door, you suck in your lips, before reaching to knock. It is only seconds when you hear the familiar bellow of Jimin calling to someone, most likely Yoongi, letting him know that he is getting the door. The anticipation is smothering even when you attempt to ease your breathing, and when the door opens you feel your heart leap.

Jimin’s eyes light up in sheer happiness when the recognition evident in his eyes sees that it is you, “[Y/N]? I didn’t know you were coming. Couldn’t get enough of me could you-”

“Jimin, I’m in love you with you.”

The words tumbled from your mouth before you even had the chance to comprehend it; Jimin’s stare enlarging along with his jaw that drops in astonishment. Clenching your teeth, you don’t even give him a chance to respond, rather, you dash past him, nearing to the bookshelf that holds an ungodly amount of college textbooks mingled with sparse figurines- the door to his bedroom only being a few feet away, holds memories of numerous homework filled evenings and crumpled paper balls the pair of you would throw at each other out of boredom. It takes an immense amount of bravery to collect the words you are not only wanting to say but needing to say when you finally spin around to meet his face as he slowly closes the front door behind him. His shoulders are tense while his thick lips rest in a straight line, but that doesn’t stop you.

“I can’t take it anymore,” you confess, your heart tearing at his face that remains unreadable, “I’ve waited so long to tell you this; and honestly, I never thought I’d see the day that I would, but here I am,” you gesture your arms swiftly in the air as if to signify your existence, “Jimin, I am so in love with you that I can’t even think straight. Literally, you smile, and I feel like I’m going to combust into the oblivion!” Wince. You have never been good at being cheesy because what is cheese without something to spice it up a tad; and what the hell is a confession of love without some questionable statements? “And, who gave you the right to be so sweet and thoughtful, and to pretty much have all of the qualities I’ve always wanted in a man. I see you almost every day, and yet, I miss you like I haven’t seen you in a month! We balance each other out so precisely that it terrifies me, and I don’t think there is anyone in this world I would rather be with. I mean seriously, Jimin, I would give the last half of my brain cell just so you could have a whole one!” You hate the fact that your eyes are welling with tears, but your emotions are pouring out, and at this point, forget the spice, “Even when my world is at its gloomiest, I’m reminded of yet another promising color you represent, it’s like you paint every picture around me so perfectly that there’s no such thing as flaws.” Because he has always accepted you for who you are. “And, for goodness sakes, even when I think I’ve had enough of you, you appear in my damn dreams, like I can’t-”

Jimin crashes his lips to yours not even giving you an opportunity to recuperate, his gesture so rapid, yet so potent, your back thuds against the bookshelf where sounds of trinkets swivel without plummeting to the floor, but either of you could care less. Deepening his kiss, your fingers slide to tangle with the plumy tufts of his hair while his remain cupping your face with not one plan of ever letting you go. The way your heart had gone from an intimidating beat to an effortless wave of soaring is beyond you, and when you dreamed of kissing him, you never thought you would ever really get to. Sparks igniting beneath your chest is more than an explanation, it’s a sensation you are finally experiencing, because the man you have been hopelessly in love with is completing the other half of your heart in this very moment.

Everything you have ever dreamed of is unfolding before you in the blink of an eye, and when he breaks the kiss, his forehead touches yours whilst he runs the tip of his thumb at the corner of your mouth. “I fell in love with you the moment I met you,” all emotion resonates from his brown eyes, “Plus, you’re fun to tease, I mean how could I resist?” You shove him as he snickers, you’ll show him a tease.

“Oh yeah?” You arch an eyebrow in attempt to challenge him, his face scrunched adorably, before your shoulders slump, “Oh! Goodness, Jimin, just kiss me!”

Chuckling into the kiss, it doesn’t take long before breaths are starting to increase, especially when his hands grip your hips in order to pull you closer. This time when you snatch his lips roughly, he sneaks a quick brush of his tongue over yours kindling the urge for you to graze his bottom lip between your teeth. “Shit,” he moans, and the mere second you feel his bulge against your stomach, the suppressed desires inside you start coming alive. No words are exchanged, both of your hands still bundling in his shirt, you drag him to his bedroom, him following without a second thought. Shutting the door, his cologne scent wafts in every part of his room, the fan blowing cool air above, you twist him around, him stumbling backward while your hands on his chest guide him.

His eyes never leave your face, even when you push him onto his bed, moving your knees on either side of him to straddle- his hands moving to grip your ass while you lean into him, him relishing in the feel of your breasts before you grasp his chin. A look of mere surprise fills his eyes while you seductively tilt your head, tracing his jawline with your stare, the gush warming your core causes you to grind your hips along his- with the way he feels about you, he will do anything you say.

“Mmm,” his grin moving to kiss your neck, “What have I gotten myself into?”

A hearty snicker leaves your lips, “How about you let me show you?”

“Oh, fuck,” his shoulders relax especially when you run your lips along his jaw, nipping his ear lobe, your warm breath causing him to shiver, his hair tickling your nose signaling to let the tufts tangle between your fingers, bringing your lips to his, holding his kiss before he parts them just enough to greet your tongue once again with the tip of his. Both hips grinding, the longing for the feel of his skin is what you want next. Lips locked, your fingertips trace from his jaw down his neck to carefully swirling along the tops of his shoulders.

When he moves to tug at the bottom of your shirt, you stop him, “Nuh uh uh uh,” you taunt, “I believe I want to see you first,” Jimin moves his hands almost immediately in mock defense which leads you to interlace your fingers with his, a loving look forming within his eyes, you laying him down just to steal a few more long kisses before jerking his shirt off- you rising to rest on your knees while he basks in all your glory. He is so toned, and you can hardly contain yourself, running your fingers along his abdomen, his chest rising and falling rapidly from just your touch. Gradually, you break the trance by giving him a toying smirk, running your hands along your body before lifting your shirt above your head, exposing your red laced bralette, his eyes widening at the sight, him nearly floored by the beauty he has yet to see. The next step you take is tracing the top of your jeans until your fingertips slowly unbutton, unzipping to reveal a matching lace thong, a soft moan escaping Jimin’s throat while his legs tense under you from the indisputable feeling hounding him below.

“You okay there, Chim?” Your voice so sexy, it can haunt any ones’ dreams, but in the loveliest way possible. He runs a hand through his hair though his back is still pressed against his pillows. “Need a little help there?”

“Oh, [Y/N],” he breathes, “I am more than okay,”

He can barely withhold himself from stealing your frame, tearing off your lingerie and sexing you right then and there, but he also is enjoying every bit of your movements, your dominant gaze, the way you hold yourself, pleasing him with the mystery you have yet to expose. Without another moment for him to ponder, you bring your hands to the button of his pants, replaying the slow way you unbutton them, unzipping them, and pulling them down his quivering legs- tossing his pants and underwear onto the ground where your clothes now lay.

Salivating at the view, your hands grip his thighs, him hissing in response. He wants you so bad, all it does is add fuel to the flaming yearn to please him. You begin. Sucking so hard, he lifts slightly, his breathing staggering while you lap your tongue along his tip, diving in once more, his taste lingering in your mouth, his hands moving to your head while you move up and down, his moans are music to your ears, and he could finish right now, but you’re not ready for him to. Lifting to rest on your knees again, you gesture for him to rise- him still recovering from the ecstasy of your mouth, he watches you- you letting him palm your bra, leaving tender kisses along your cleavage, his lips causing your heat to clench, especially when you kiss him again- this time unhurriedly- letting desire take over especially with the way his lips mold with yours- so lovingly, so passionate.

He wants to make you feel good, you can tell by the way his fingers move to slip into your underwear, gliding along your sopping entrance, his eyes nearly rolling back in his head with how turned on you are for him. “Ohhh, fuck,” he exhales, his forehead meeting your chest while you grip his shoulders. Him pumping his fingers within you, you run your hand to the back of his head, gripping the orange strands, but not to the point to cause any pain, you tug just enough to get him to meet your stare, his eyes squeezing from how much that mere gesture turned him on even more than he already is.

Slanting your head knowingly, you speak, “Wanna taste?”

He whispers, “So bad. So so bad,”

Pinning him down, his fingers released from your entrance, you whip around to where your back faces him, his heated hands smoothing along your ass, appreciating the thong flooding his line of vision, him then moving it out of the way so he can take in the sight of your drenched heat the moment you bend forward. Swaying your hips from side to side, you give him another minute – him moving his hands to grip the front of your thighs.

That’s when you hear it, the parting of his lips before the tip of his tongue swipes along your entrance. “Mmmm,” you moan, him spreading your folds in order to give another long lick before he hungrily flicks his tongue along your clit- savoring the taste he’s longed for the second you two shut his bedroom door. “Oh, Jiminnn,” your voice sounds higher from the way the shivers wave across your body- him sashaying his tongue relentlessly on your entrance, building the feeling to the point you can come at any time.

He nearly melts the moment you begin to pleasure him too, stealing his erection with your mouth, sucking while he licks simultaneously- the both of your moans drowning out the noise of anything outside the room. When you feel the brink of an orgasm about to take its course, you spring forward, grasping his area within your palm, you rise and fall to fill your entrance with all of him. He can’t even comprehend, he just lets you ride him, getting lost in the feeling of being inside you, his breath hitching at the sight of your figure dancing on top of him.

Though he is in love with your body, the perfection of your curves, your beautiful mannerisms, and your glistening eyes- nothing beats the fact how in love he is with your heart of gold, the way your smile lights up any room you walk into, your determination to complete any goal you have listed on your heart, or the way you stole his heart the second you were introduced to him. Jimin is in love with you.

Jimin is in love with all of you.

Every single bit.

His hands move to your hips, lifting you to move you under him. You’re astonished at first, him hovering above you, his hand cupping your cheek for his thumb to stroke it. Both of your pants are heard though the moment is nowhere near lost. “God, you’re so beautiful,” you murmur. Awe dawns his expression, him moving to rest his forehead upon yours, his hair shading his eyes, his bare legs tangling with yours, his heated skin soothing among yours. It’s clear the two of you have a chemistry that neither of you can put into words.

“I love you so much,” he whispers, pressing a tepid kiss to the corner of your mouth.

“And, I love you so much,”

Jimin kisses you- sultry and steamy- relighting the fumes of desire- your gasping breaths mingling with the whirling of your tongues until he brings his penis to your heat- thrusting in you whilst your fingers scratch down his back. Time passes before the climax begins, you muffle your screams into his shoulder, him releasing in you once both of you finish. The sensitivity reeling- he collapses beside you- your hand immediately finding his, intertwining your fingers before turning to flash him a musing look. “Sex like that, I don’t think I’ll ever leave,” you wink.

“If you keep looking at me like you want a round two, I don’t think I’ll let you,” he chortles. Slipping under the covers, your laughing smile buries partly into his chest, while you shake your head at him, but at the same time you are coming down from a solace you never thought could be possible. You let a few minutes pass by first, stifling a smile,

“Oh, um… Jimin?”

“Hm,” he hums, eyebrows furrowing as he peers down at you in concern.

“If you ever buy me a cupcake again, I will smush it in your face.”

Lips breaking out into a huge smile, he chuckles at you incredulously, “Bring it on,” and with that, his fingers tip your chin, pressing a sweet kiss to your mouth, completing you like the sun to the sky, the greenery to a meadow, the icing to a cupcake,

A rainbow after a long and treacherous storm.

Pairing: barista!hoseok x nurse!reader, s2l!au

There’s a distinct familiarity in the air, one of flawless breezes and thrilly jingles from a bell hung upon the door to your favorite coffee shop that is nestled downtown in the center of your city. The strong aroma of freshly brewed liquid warms you just enough to where your arms wrap around your frame- the loose hems of your cashmere sweater cuddle the majority of your palms while the sensation of your purse settles along your thigh. It’s been a while since you’ve been here, and with the usual crave of your preferred drink, it’s only fitting, especially with the way the deep shades of red mingle with dim, orange hues which enlighten the reminder that autumn has finally arrived. 

Glittery leaves decorate the railings within the building matching the colors of the signs promoting the return of the infamous pumpkin spice latte- one you have tried many times, yet you can’t seem to completely veer away from your steaming mug of lemon tea. It’s always been made at its best, and it serves the swarming memories of long nights after work when your relative would fix you a cup every night to help calm you after an eventful day of securing medicine at a nursing home.

Raking cold fingers through your hair, you take your place in line, nearing the counter before the frilly, brown tendrils of a male seem to catch you by surprise. His pink lips are already settled into a grin while he takes the card payment from the person in front of you embellishing small dimples that add to the glimmering brown in his almond eyes. Your heart seems to react almost immediately prompting heat to rush to your rosy cheeks sparking small shivers to curse your fingertips. 

His digits tap at the keys rapidly before his eyes greet yours with the same kind smile he shares to others, “Good morning, what can I get for you today?”

You’re too stunned for words to form fast enough, stuttering the order you usually never struggle to say, “I- erm, lemon tea, please. For here,” your eyes instinctively fall to your fumbling hands unzipping your bag in goal of grabbing your wallet. Once cash is gripped between your quivering fingers, your timorous stare catches the bold letters adorning his nametag before feeling the swift brush of his touch gathering the change from you.  

“Coming right up!” 

The incredible amount of consciousness it takes to not trip over your feet on the tread to find a table baffles you prompting a quiet giggle to yourself, yet the budding attraction to the employee doesn’t disappear in an instant. Rather, you suppress the thought just enough to focus on the skidding chair before comfortably settling in the favored corner adjacent to the large window revealing a pleasant blanket of gray clouds hovering the evidence of rain. Something about panging droplets upon a roof has always brought serenity in times you’ve needed it most; days can seem shorter especially when dealing with humanity, and since today happens to be a rare day off- you will enjoy every minute if possible.

Hands now folded beneath your chin, you get lost in the view outside- sauntering pedestrians preparing their umbrellas with the occasional swaying maple leaves captured by the wind to press their stems along the cement before being retaken to fly elsewhere. And let’s not forget the extra fabric swaddling frames now with the expectation of the weather cooling- nothing seems to beat your favorite season- the quiet facade it brings to your soul, or the assemblage of colors that define the entire fall as a whole. 

The distraction is nearly exhilarating that you jump almost immediately when a tall shadow enters your peripherals, “Your lemon tea, ma’am.” He must not have caught your wide-eyed gaze for the gentle clink of the plate holding the steaming mug of your order now rests before you.

“Th-thank you, Sir,” peaking at his name tag once again, you grin up at him, “Hoseok,” he bows at your words, smiling from ear to ear just to flash a beautiful set of teeth, his hair slightly falling into his eyes, and here you are swearing inwardly that he is the most beautiful encounter you have ever witnessed. Though frequenting this place, you have never seen him until now, which sparks the question on whether he is new to solely the store, or to this town in general. Hoseok returns to the registers faster than you realize, eyes still lingering just for you to avert your gape to your tea- curling your fingers around the glass to warm them. 

You’re a quarter of the way finished with your drink when you lose track of time, sighing softly, you wonder what your friend Sofia and her boyfriend, Taehyung have been up to as of late, wishing you could free more time enough to visit. Last you heard, Taehyung proposed, and Sofia has been planning their big day ever since. You don’t expect it, the dispersing of your thoughts when you notice the uniformed individual that has gained your attention the minute you stepped into this building, to swiftly move to a spot far enough away to where you can safely observe him. 

His stare remains glued to his phone, a jacket folded over his arm- he seems highly concentrated on whoever he’s texting, yet all you can do is focus on how handsome he is. You want to speak to him considering the possibility he may be on break, but piling enough courage to do so is a tad intimidating, and you are definitely unaware by the length of time your gaze has remained on Hoseok, that he glimpses above his phone screen, your heart skipping from being caught just to drop your lids to the now empty mug cradled in your hands. GAH, the scold your brain is rampaging is enough to make you want to wince, telling yourself numerously that you need to be more careful.

The travel home seems faster than usual, but with the greeting of Bram, your Jack Russell mix, you’re very grateful to make it to your house. He pants excitingly while his paws swipe your knees with each jump. “Hello, my sweetheart,” you coo, rubbing along his fluffy fur where a black spot covers the majority of his back. Your dog is your everything, so the joy of cuddling him close the rest of the evening until you slip into slumber is always your favorite end to a rainy night.

- 

Pat, pat, pat. Darkness loses to the fluttering of your eyelids now being gifted with the essence of the season you’ve been dreaming about. Pat, pat, pat. A droplet here and there heightens your auditory senses while you remain halted in place; bare feet press along the cold pavement that has been freshly rained upon placing myriads of glued leaves on almost every inch of the road. Rows of long trunks host autumn hues that rustle lightly from the chilly wind now drifting past your shoulders where feather touches of your hair barely tickle. 

You’re uncertain of why everything seems blurry as though it’s not real, yet the excitement of such an ideal setting is enough to start the promenading of the street- pouncing in the air with the clack of your ankles, squeals of glee escaping whilst you twirl- the deep shade of your maroon dress flowing from the movement, blending in with the surroundings. Lost in a world of utter peace, there are no rules here other than happiness, and that’s a world you’ve always longed for. 

Reaching a curve, the joyful tune brewing from your lips softens the very second your stare lands upon a silhouette in the distance. The figure isn’t facing you, but you notice enough to realize he’s alone- brown strands hidden within a faded orange beanie, he’s nestled upon the grass with crossed legs, hands placed before him that appear to be fiddling with something, but at the angle, you are standing, all you can gather other than his presence are items clearing to be a journal and a pen resting by his side.

Curiosity consumes you enough to proceed forward, tiptoeing nearer to figure if he might be someone you have seen before, but one thing you did not anticipate is the sudden crunch of the leaves- ones that must have freshly fallen from the side of the trees that have not been kissed by the rain startling you producing a sudden gasp- widening eyes lifting to reveal the turn of his face-

-

“Sh- !” Sitting up immediately in your bed, perspiration lingering the lining of your hair- the hyped beat of your heart pounds into your temples before you brush the loosened streaks from your vision; Bram instinctively pounces to lick your face in desperation to calm you, curling onto your lap the second your hand gently smooths among the top of his head. It’s been a week since you’ve been to the coffee shop, and though everything was merely a dream, you can’t help the doting incentive that the person who arrived happens to be the same individual you can’t seem to easily forget about. It’s strange to you, but there’s just something about him, and before you know it, as soon as your shift ends for the day, you find yourself entering the store in hopes that the employee of your dreams, you inwardly tease, is awaiting to serve you another request of your favorite drink. To your delight, he is working, and to add to your giddiness, the place is fairly empty meaning no lines for you to wait in. 

“Hello, how are you today?” Hoseok’s hands wrap around the sides of the register- his smile captivating you as it did last time to the point that timidness takes over- the blush in your cheeks revealing itself as soon as you reach the counter. 

“Work,” 

“Oh,” he giggles, although, your response was mouthed before you could have stopped yourself and you wince at how you may have sounded considering he’s currently in the process of working himself. 

“I’m sorry, I meant, I-”

“Well, in that case, how about some lemon tea? If I’m correct?” 

You’re stunned by how well his memory must be, and the way his eyes squint in concentration in hopes that he’s right melts your heart,  “Ye-yes, for here,” 

“Alright,” he chuckles, punching in the order, “Coming right up. My treat,” 

“Wait what? No, no, you don’t have to do that-” 

“I understand how tough it can be,” he raises his hands as if in defense, “It’s my treat, remind me of your name?” He arches an eyebrow when he presses his lips together.

“[Y/N],” you smile, still in awe of the kindness he has surprised you with after such a brutal day of work, “Thank you. Really, thank you,” 

“Anytime,” his voice is tender, and you can hardly express your gratitude though you wonder if its the wrinkled fabric of your scrubs with random decor of stains that gave way of how your day has gone that potentially caused the reason of his gesture. Either way, you’re floored, and when he brings you the lemon tea, you thank him again, the heat of your skin still burning red. 

-

Pelt, pelt, pelt. Fingers curl to reveal the plush of a blanket laying beneath you while the sun protrudes brightly through the trees. The careful turn of your head discovers the encompassing of plump pumpkins-  perfumes of apple spice sweep past your nostrils while your vision explores the scenery. Confusion creases at the corner of your eyes, wondering where you must be considering this is a fantasy you have yet to venture. Pelt, pelt, pelt. Droplets of rain spring off your skin sporadically, but not enough to linger for you to remember it exists.

“Hello,” though merely a soft murmur, the unexpected sound jolts you to sit up, a gasp flying from your mouth staring at the apologetic eyes of the man who realizes he has scared you. Relief floods your bones- gaze falling to the journal and pen planted beside him as before. There’s the persistent curiosity revolving around the book, but more so, your stare returns to the oval face of the timorous human now staring at his twiddling hands in shame. 

He doesn’t have to be ashamed, and the desperate aura to prove this to him prompts you into action. You are unaware of how near the proximity to him is when you mirror his stature of crossed legs- your knees pressing to his once the desire to feel his slim fingers between yours forces you to hope that he can’t read your mind. It’s only your imagination, right? It is not like he truly will know of the courage you yearn to live in reality. In substantiality, trust is a process for you- learning another is a task in itself for you- but in slumber, there’s a certain bravery you collect especially when this moment feels so right. 

His lips are parted just as yours are- enlarged-eyed nerves form magic as real as the season living out in this universe. There’s no more waiting- it just happens in the spur of a second where you kiss him, his hands finding their homes on either side of your face, leaning more into you. Rapidly, nature seems to know the cue when leaves swirl in the wind encircling the pair of you in a painted cascade of red, yellow and orange. Your jaw is loved by the slow traces of his fingertips, returning to rest your back upon the blanket where his body aligns with yours, and despite this fiction playing effortlessly in your conscious, you feel his smile against your lips the same as he feels yours. And with that, there’s nothing you want more than this dream to become a truth. 

-

“You’re not crazy, love,” Sofia promises on the other line of the phone though you have a stubborn notion of not believing her statement, “I think you just have a wee little crush on a certain barista,”  

Currently shuffling to unlock your car, you’re ready to head home from work to check on your dog, hoping he’s kept the house in good shape while you’ve been gone, “But how though? I don’t even know the guy.”

“Distant crushes are real, hun,” 

“I don’t know,” you heave a long sigh, the back of your head resting upon the cushion of the driver’s side, hardly bringing yourself to start your vehicle just yet.

“Have you… Talked to him since the last time?”

“....No.”

“I should have known,” Sofia groans, “You are the most stubborn soul I know, and you wouldn’t be you if you weren’t,” 

“I learn from the best,” you tease, laughter between you and your best friend making the air seem lighter than earlier. 

“That, you do. Be safe and keep me updated. Tell little Bram I love him,”

“Will do,” you pact, thankful to hear her voice. The journey home reminds you of a few trails hidden away in a park behind your house. Maybe over the weekend, you can visit to find an ounce of solitude in nature, otherwise, the plan of a small nap is in your best interest, so the abrupt minute you find, you flip on the tv for some background noise, eventually drifting into the familiar sound of rain beginning another daydream with your sweet Bram cuddled by your side.

- 

There it is. The familiar corner where you’ve turned in previous times that relives the journey of precise coloration reigniting the joy that sparks the padding of anxious footsteps into the direction of what may be awaiting. The preface of your wonderment is where you are now- you are right at the very start of autumn hues rustling in tall trees aligned accordingly on either side of the paved road glimmering pasted leaves under your heels. A hounding prolepsis of hope gives the concept that someone is indeed here, and you must find him before it’s too late. 

Elation turns into tattered fear of losing to waking in reality, speeding your steps though you feel you are going nowhere. A loss of time can ruin the means of opportunity and when your skipping legs finally reach the curve, you pause- a building smile spreading across your face at the man standing before you. Head cast downward, he’s penning within his journal, fully concentrating on whatever he is writing. Inching closer, he closes the journal- a thin thread of a golden bookmark keeps a tab on where he last written. His tender gaze holds yours for what feels like forever until he turns his journal to you flashing a loving grin that exuberates permission for you to open to the page he’s left for you. 

Uncertainty of hesitation only shows in the flicker of your eyes studying his heart that he’s wearing on his sleeve. Gradually, you grab at the end of the bookmark between your fingertips, lifting the first half of the book to unveil a message that brings touched tears to your eyes. 

Scribbled in the center of the page in artistically drawn bold letters are the words you have longed for, but never knew you needed,

��You’re my favorite part of every season’

-

It’s been a month since you’ve seen him; a month since you’ve had the dreams; and a month since you’ve been able to enjoy the soothing taste of a tepid cup of lemon tea. Carried away by the hours of your job, it has been difficult to provide any time for yourself- leading your brain to the point of forgetting about the interests you’ve once had prior. The trails have been calling your name consistently to the point you find the will to go, zipping your coat to then huddling your hands within the pockets. Twenty minutes pass until the breaking of the path comes into view, and out of a habit, you hum a random tune to the chilly breeze, swaying your shoulders until the leap of your heart stops you in your tracks.

A beanie- faded to match the season, yet this time he’s not looking down, he’s staring out into the trees where birds sing in unison with chirping crickets, and to your rigid frame, your eyes scan the spot where you always found them: a journal and pen rested by his side as they always have. You cannot speak, for whatever is happening before you is real, and you attempt to decipher the possibility of this being just that: real. You want to run, but why cower when the chance is right there within your reach?  

Hoseok hears your steps that you do not comprehend that you’re making, yet you don’t stop; a smile exists on your lips shining from your eyes that meet his that beam recognition,

“Hey there!” He stands from the blanket he’s been sitting on, smiling from ear to ear while offering his hand to shake yours, “It’s been a long time!”

You’re flattered by his noticing of your vacancy, and at the feel of his large hand enveloping yours, you briefly shake it, still shocked by the event screening in front of you, “Hello to you! I didn’t know you came here?”

“As often as I can,” he nods, turning his head to absorb the atmosphere around him, “It’s quite comforting,” 

“That, it is,” you agree, gape dropping to your shoes, “It’s my favorite place to go this time of year,” 

“I’d have to say it’s the same for me, too,” an awkward silence seems like an eternity when it only lasts for about five seconds leading to the clearing of Hoseok’s throat, “How have you been? We miss seeing you at the shop,” 

“I’ve been well, I hope you are,” you giggle, gesturing toward the blanket spread upon the grass, “Is it okay if I join you?” 

“Of course you can!” His voice sounds so happy. Happiness that lifts the hope you now have embraced. Hoseok politely reaches for your hand to help you sit down, each of you crossing your legs to get comfortable to notice his fingertips have yet to leave yours. At first, the nervous tension of question shows on his face when he finally makes the connection, yet you nod the okay, sliding your palm to mold with his. Neither of you let go, and maybe you have not been the only one shaken by his countenance, for his heart is thrumming in equal pace as yours. As the hours pass by, you find yourself nestled into his side where he rests his cheek upon your head, watching the leaves of the season fall into place just as this moment: the start of a dream come true. 

Pairing: model!taehyung x female!reader, s2l!au

Immense.

The sound of the waves spread along the sand, the rushing water crashing in motion against the wind. Shades of blue cover the sky where the sun is sitting at its highest peak, running along the ocean making the deep indigo glisten beneath its rays. Heat covers every centimeter of your skin, but you wouldn’t trade it for the world, especially with the feel of the warm sand grazing between your toes. The shift of palm tree leaves is nearly deafened by the sea, and you lift your chin to the sky leaning back on the palms of your hands soaking in as much beauty of your surroundings as you can.

As the wind picks up, your hair sways in the direction of it, tickling your shoulder in the process. If you could choose your Heaven, this is where it would be, and as if the echoes of the ocean are beckoning you, you find yourself striding in the sand, the slow pace of your movement silent with each step. You’re nowhere to be heard, nowhere to be seen, nowhere to be endangered, just you and the shore enjoying each other’s company.

As you further along the seaside, something in the distance catches your attention, causing you to steady in place. He stares in front of him with his face raised slightly toward the sky, dark hair covers his head ending at the nape of his neck, pink lips are parted as his bronze skin glows along with the sun, a red necklace decorating his neck. Your eyes trail to see he’s dressed in loose, white clothing with slim black lines checkering the entire outfit complimenting a blue, thin fabric of a coat relying on his shoulders as it sways in the breeze. His arms are blanketed within the coat- his hands buried in his pockets.

Slanting your head, you can’t help but stare- especially with the curve of his jawline bringing a desire to you that you don’t understand. With a tinge of chagrin, you hope he can’t read your mind. With the tendency of dreams never going the way one would hope, you avoid expecting the worst. Instead, you merely glimpse at the person ahead of you wondering how someone with such beauty could captivate you the way the ocean does.

When you think you’re safe at the distance you are, the male suddenly looks in your direction catching your gaze-

-

The sun greets you through the window, the mattress beneath your back summoning you to slip back into the covers as you notice the shadow of the blinds are dancing along your bed. Blearily, you force yourself to sit up, sucking in a slow breath, reaching your arms above your head to stretch. The waves outside engulf you with inner peace as you lean back against the bed frame.

For a whole year you saved enough money to travel to the opposite end of where you live, so you could vacation at the beach you’ve always dreamed of. The recovering feeling from your dream still lingers, and you shake it away, swinging your legs over the bed and jogging to the bathroom to brush your teeth and prepare for the rest of the day. Walking along the beach is comforting, especially with the atmosphere filled with laughter, slaps to a volleyball, the inflating of beach balls, chirping of seagulls, the setting up of beach chairs and padding footsteps along the sand.

The coast has been your dream escape since you were a kid, and now that you have raised enough money, you took off a month of work to simply be alone and bask in the world you deem as paradise. As the wind wafts along your skin, a grin tugs at your lips once you settle onto your beach towel, letting the ocean resonate your auditory senses drifting you into a bliss you could relax in for eternity.

-

Purple tones are visible in the blue sky, white buildings nearly blind your vision as glimpses of green palm tree leaves align the coastline in the distance. Small pebbles of gray gravel are spread in a thin layer beneath your feet and to your left stands a black gate, encircling you in a vista you do not recognize. Far different from what you expected, yet the heat of the sun remains the same, giving a shimmer to your skin that you have yet to grow used to.

As you raise your eyes to look in front of you, the jolt of your heart causes your eyes to expand as the silhouette of the dashing man from your previous fantasy is now standing a few feet away. Much closer than he was before, his jaw is set as he continues to stare in front of him. His hair barely wisps in the breeze, but its long enough to evoke the inward longing to run your fingers in it; his countenance so alluring, you fight the urge to waltz toward him, letting the splendor of his stature overcome you. When you think he is oblivious to your gape, he catches your eyes, a silent chuckle escapes him as he looks down for a second to then returning his eyes to yours- a side smirk present on his lips. His whole body faces you now, his hands still in the pockets of the same outfit he wore before, the blue coat still blowing with the calm breeze.

You’re motionless as he approaches you, confidence leaking from his expression as his deep brown eyes bare into your soul, and yet you can’t look away. You won’t. As he nears you, there is only one question remaining on your mind,

“Who are you?” except no voice from you is uttered but mouthed as you search his eyes.

“Yours,” he mouths, reaching his fingertips to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear still holding your widen gaze, “I’m yours.”

-

You pace along the living space of the condo, your fingertips against your lips as you chew at the side of your cheek. As much as you’d love to tour the beach, you’re more in the mood of air condition for the moment contemplating on what to eat for lunch as you admire the sunshine once more. Nearly a week down of vacation, and you have never felt so at peace as you do right now. Walking towards where the television is set, you reach for the remote, pressing the ‘on’ button until the screen comes to life. Letting the voices of whatever show is playing fill the silent space as you turn on a heel to prepare lunch.

Once your food is made, you return to the living room setting the food on the coffee table before you. Taking a quick look at the screen, you realize a fashion show must be going on as a beautiful model flashing a gorgeous, red dress struts back to behind the stage probably shedding off her clothes to redress in another outfit. Taking a quick bite of your lunch, you then return your eyes to the screen when everything in the room goes silent.

The food in your mouth suddenly has a foul taste as nausea wells in the pit of your stomach. Your eyes are fixated before you as you watch the man from your dreams walk down the stage adorning the outfit you have seen multiple times already- his stance so professional as he poses a few times, his eyes never leaving the camera until he turns to walk to the back of the runway, disappearing backstage. Your heart is pounding as shock overpowers you- did you happen to see him before? Was there any ounce of familiarity when he first appeared in your dreams? Uncertainty is evident in your expression as you refuse to turn away from the tv screen. To your relief, he visits the stage again, but in another outfit, and when letters flash at the corner of the screen, you lean forward reading them aloud,

“Kim Taehyung.”

-

Bright- so bright that the bed covers, walls and furniture bring such a clean aura to the atmosphere even with the love being made below the sunrays casting shadows along his skin. His lips are smooth as he breathes against your mouth- so caring with the emotion that your head is spinning. His fingertips run along the bare skin of your back, soothing your soul as he then trails his lips along the side of your neck to your shoulder, your face nestling in his hair absorbing every bit of him as he returns to touch his lips to your cheeks, nose, eyelids, forehead- cherishing all he adores of you one kiss at a time.

When he steals your lips once more, your fingers tangle with the feathery tufts of his hair, his strong arms wrapping around you, his warm chest pressing against yours, the bliss so enthralling you never want it to end. When you break the kiss, all is silenced. Not a word is said, not even a breath is heard, but when the desire of his kiss burns within you, you crash your lips to his, the waves outside roaring so loud it’s as if a storm is approaching. The rush of the currents matches the adrenaline taking over your mind and the indisputable pounding of the both of your hearts as the two of you get lost in each other like the sounds of the trees when the tide kicks in.

The energy of his existence flashes so many yearnings that even you can’t comprehend; even the want for a forever with someone that you’ve never considered before- especially with this stranger who enticed you the moment you laid eyes on him- standing beside the one place you’ve longed for a getaway to since you were young. You dare not break his kiss as he moves to hover above you, stroking your cheek with his thumb as you move your hands to his shoulders. As the two of you slip under the covers, you let the power of the waves drown out the fear of you waking up- for now, all you wish for is to remain entangled with Taehyung to the music of the sea.

-

The smile on your lips when you awake doesn’t come to a surprise especially with the ‘lovey’ feel you discover rising beneath your chest. How a model you have never met on a tv screen can attract you in such a way is beyond you, but with dreams like that, you will gladly fall asleep all the time. Preparing for the day, you decide to go to the boardwalk of the beach and roam along the shops seeing if anything catches your eyes. The heat of the sun is welcoming especially once you tread in the direction of the shops- enjoying the rays tinging your darkening skin. You applied suntan lotion before you left, and the smell of it lingers as you continue the path.

People pass you from left and right nodding polite smiles as you return them; but, one person causes you to pause- and immediately, you turn to look behind you. Blinking, the figure you thought you saw is no longer there and you shake your head to rid of the thought and let out a soft giggle. “You’ve gone mad,” you whisper, ignoring the curious looks of the individuals who noticed your strange veneer. When the evening approaches, you unfold your new purchases and settle them into your suitcase, throwing on some clean pajamas and sliding under the covers, letting the waves drift you into a snooze.

-

The howling of the wind attacks the ocean, but not one wave erupts. You are standing in the middle of the enormous blue, the sky a dimming gray, as the end of your white dress flutters away from your ankles with the breeze. Your eyes search around you, every direction vacant of a single soul, and as you scream, not one sound escapes. You’re longing to be free- somewhere the sand burns the bottom of your feet and the ocean cools your skin as you twirl within the water. You’re longing for someone- a rescuer- a peace.

When you think all hope is lost, a soft pang of light metal hits your chest and your fingers fly to feel a necklace being hooked behind your neck. Eyes widening, mouth agape, your eyes stare at the red string, the circle piece dangling from the necklace holds a letter- the first letter of your name. Realization dawns on you as tears brim your eyes. You turn around briefly- your eyes meeting the brown orbs of Taehyung.

Suddenly, the wind completely stops, and all is hushed. Sun rays appear out of nowhere, the serene view taking over your senses. A gentle smile forms on his lips, your heart melting as a loving grin tugs at the corner of yours. He wore a necklace with the initial of your first name everywhere he went to remind himself of his devotion to you. When he nods toward the circle piece between your fingertips, you realize there must be more engraved. Slowly turning the piece over- italicized words appear causing you to gasp, bringing your hand to cover your mouth:

‘My love for you runs deeper than the sea,

and endless as the ocean’

Returning your gaze to him, you fly into his arms- his grip tightening just enough to keep you pressed to him- his pounding heart so strong you can feel it against your chest. As wide smiles adorn the both of your faces, he sets you down, your feet returning to the water as you nestle your hand on the back of his neck. With one more passionate gaze, you capture his lips with yours- the waves explode all around- crashing in every direction, yet the only thing showering the two of you is the mist from the currents as they swallow each other with every roar.

-

A recurring trip to the boardwalk the following morning is no surprise to you since the urge to have another shopping trip won its case, and here you are. Your sun hat protects your eyes from the sunlight as you admire your outfit of choice for the day, letting the beautiful dream you had the night before fade into the back of your mind. Gazing into the windows of the shops, you click your tongue trying to avoid being indecisive and just waltz into a store- but, most of the shops you had seen yesterday, and now the choices of ones you haven’t been in quite yet have lessened.

Ambling across the pavement, your eyes stay focused to the stores until you suddenly bump into someone.

“Oh!” You say, the sound of something clinging the pavement causes your heart to drop. “Oh, I’m so sorry!” You breathe, raising your arms in front of you to help the stranger. He bends down to retrieve a pair of sunglasses, examines them, then folds them to hang from the front of his shirt. Before you get a chance to comprehend what just happened, he turns his face, his eyes snatching yours. “Taehyung,” you whisper, and he arches an eyebrow in confusion, his lips pursed as if he’s going to speak. In panic, you shake your head, “You’re Kim Taehyung. I saw the fashion show the other day. Very- um, - very suave.” You say it without thinking, and as he utters a small chuckle, his expression softens, and you could kick yourself. Suave!? Who in the tropical islands at 11 in the AM says suave!?

“Why, thank you,” he nods, and you try to calm your trembling hands. “May I ask your name?”

“[Y/N],” you say instantaneously as your eyes shoot up to meet his- you gulp when the familiar tug of his smile embellishes his lips, “My name’s [Y/N].”

“Well,” he wets his lips, “Since you seem to already know a little bit about me, what do you say that I get to know you? I’m heading to walk the beach if you’d like to come?”

You hold his gaze as a warm smile and giddy feeling overwhelms you, “My schedule’s clear,” you say, and the two of you, shoulders brushing, continue in the direction of the seashore- eventually strolling along the beach until a blanket of stars hovers above the ocean- endless as the journey the two of you will endeavor.

Pairing: boyfriend!yoongi x collegestudent!reader, establishedrelationship!au, college!au (18+)

Vacant.Swirls of orange-brown dunes flood your line of vision, the heat grossly seen resonating in the air, your skin tinged by the sun rays, the humidity suffocating. Parched, your eyes scan the vacant desert, nothing in sight other than the pale blue sky holding only the sun and howling winds causing your hair to fly wildly behind you. You��re longing for something- anything to quench the thirst clinging at the back of your throat. Stepping forward, the burning sensation cooling when each foot raises momentarily, you leave your footprints behind, fingers gripping the dry material of your grit stained dress, your eyes squinting in protection against the loose sand panging your being.

You’ve been here before in this very place. Desperately searching for whatever is needed to satisfy this torturous yearn. The wind still blazing, your jaw clenches in determination, you tread up the dunes, legs aching from the effort of reaching the top, sand drowning your ankles. It feels if an eternity has taken place until your eyes peer at an image in the distance.

A leafless tree sits- limp and lifeless- brittle branches swaying, the color dark compared to the pulsating color of the surroundings. You try to clear your vision, just enough to discover you’re not alone. Blonde hair drenched and clinging to his forehead, your heart halts when you notice him leaned against the tree, body weak, arms flaccid on either side of his frail frame, thin lips cracked from lack of moisture, eyes glued shut from exhaustion.

Fear grips every bone in your body, eyes enlarging when you let out what’s supposed to be an ear-piercing scream, but you’re mute. You want to run to him. You want to save him, but your feet will only carry you so far. And, as you move, it’s like the mirage before you drift further away, his silhouette so out of reach- with an outstretched hand, you fight to make it to him- he tilts his head, fluttering his eyelids just enough to see who-

-

“You’ll see him soon,” your friend, Em, assures you, a grin decorating her lips, “If I were you, I wouldn’t worry about it.” She pats your shoulder before scurrying off, leaving you alone on the trampoline outside of your parents’ house. You will be attending a community college just a few miles up the road, yet the excitement of starting classes leading you into your future career path isn’t the only thing on your mind.

“I just miss him,” you whisper, crossing your legs, scraping at the black material that has already stained your bare feet. Your final day with him before he left was spent with the two of you laughing- jumping on the trampoline until your legs gave out- both of you collapsing side by side, his fingers intertwining with yours once your eyes locked. You miss his smile more than he will ever know, and the longing to feel his warmth never dims, the anticipation to hear his voice lingering in the back of your mind once you hop onto the ground, sauntering to your room to check your phone.

-

Sparse cactuses trail the horizon, the sun appearing just beyond a gray mountain- strands of cirrus clouds are evident in the bright blue- blanketing over the famine that you are amid. Tumbleweeds roll along the land swiping your gaze, the dirt beneath your feet crunch with each step, your hands bundling in the front of your dress. The earth is quiet, not even a shift of the wind is heard, yet you search for the one thing that will satiate the thirsting obsessing within your soul. The temperature increases causing beads of sweat to align your forehead, your journey cut short when your gaze falls upon a pink flower nestled above round cacti.

Puzzled, you approach the plant, the petals vibrant beneath the sun rays, yet the beauty of such thing enchants you just enough that you reach to stroke the smooth floret. The fragrance brings serenity you have wished for, your senses coming alive with each sniff. That’s when a sound floods your aural canals beckoning you to widen your eyes in a well-needed hope.

Trickling water, as if a fountain in a pond, serenades your ears the moment you straighten your stance. Eyes perusing the scape, the direction of it seems to come from only one place. Whirling around, your hand flies to your chest, vocalization knocked from you, the thrumming of your heart beating at the figure standing a few feet away. His head cast downward, you swallow, reaching a trembling hand toward his feeble frame, his arms drooping on either side, curiosity engulfing you with each movement in his direction, the dribbling water loudening as you inch closer. He doesn’t budge. Not until your hand rests firmly on his shoulder causing him to jolt, wide brown eyes hold your-

-

“Awe, not again,” you whine through the phone screen, Yoongi chuckling, a black mouth mask covering most of his chin, blonde strands covering his forehead beneath a black beanie.

“I’m sorry, babe. Jimin wants to play a game,” he smiles, your heart swelling at the way his eyes light up when he sees your face.

“Well, tell Jimin to shove the game up his-”

“Come again?” Jimin appears over Yoongi’s shoulder, a bright smile plastered along his face- his eyes nearly closed shut from how wide it is.

Shaking your head, “I said what I said,” you shrug, “Carrot head.”

“Hey, be nice, he’s fragile,” Yoongi kids, Jimin playfully punching his arm, you stifle a snicker.

“Same goes for you, Lemons.”

Yoongi clucks his tongue at you, swaying from side to side in his rolling chair, Jimin’s chuckle muffled behind the screen as he walks away the moment a brief sound is heard. You observe Yoongi’s confused expression as he swivels to face his bedroom door. “I got it!” Jimin calls back.

“Is someone there?” You furrow your eyebrows, Yoongi turning to face his phone camera again.

“Not sure who. We’re not expecting anyone,” you watch your boyfriend pause glimpsing behind him- a loud thump on the wall signals him to stand- closing his bedroom door then returning to finish his conversation with you, “I don’t think it’s Namjoon.”

From the way Yoongi’s laughing, you agree, “What is Namjoon up to nowadays?” You wonder, heck, you wonder what’s been up with everyone these days. Your friend who visited you the night before leaving to visit her boyfriend Hoseok at the coffee shop he works at- also talking about an art show the two were invited to by her other best friend who is dating a famous pastel artist by the name of Seokjin- and your dear friend Jungkook has finally found the love of his life who happens to be the boss of the girl who is dating Seokjin. Not to mention Seokjin is best friends with a popular model by the name of Taehyung who happens to be dating a girl you graduated high school with a year or so ago.

“He’s been visiting the park a lot, honestly I think he’s found someone, too,” Yoongi replies, scratching at the back of his neck. When an awkward silence comes between you two, you can’t help but pick at your fingernails, wishing for nothing more than to be in the arms of your constant. “I miss you,” his voice is in a whisper, tears brimming your eyes.

“I miss you, too Yoons. So much.”

When the two of you end the video call, you slip under the covers, fighting the tears threatening to spill onto the stuffed animal Yoongi gifted you before he left for college. 

-

Cracked yellow dust spreads along the terrestrial view- nonentity in sight. Sun blaring profusely in the sky, the deprivation of the ground abundant, you can hardly breathe with the heat leaving then re-entering your lungs. Your tongue suffers with your boiling skin, aching for a stream, maybe even a waterfall of happiness to suppress this never-ending thirst plaguing you with every fantasy you’ve dreamed.

When the flowing water greets your ears again, you pant, turning immediately to see his face. Lips parted, with weak eyes he holds your gaze, shoulders slumped, yet he wills himself to you gradually, your hands instinctively reaching to cup his face in desperation to heal him. When his warm hands gently hold your wrists, he searches your mind, gathering what all he can, eyes flickering to your lips. With a hint of a smile, though fatigue weighs heavy, you capture his lips almost impulsively, the gentleness sending waves of elation from your fingertips to your toes. A pang of a droplet mashes off your forehead, the two of you pulling away with knitted eyebrows, your breath hitching the second you feel another one hit the top of your hand.

Multiple pangs hit the ground encircling the two of you, the dimming of the sun apparent, you look toward the sky to see strands of gray clouds hovering over the earth. As if nature reads your mind, rain instantly pounds the ground, soaking every millimeter of the scenery bringing triumphant smiles on you and the man’s faces, a joyful laugh escaping him as the water refreshes your cooling silhouettes. When you meet his stare again, he pulls you in, kissing you even harder than before, his hands entangling in your soaked hair.

All you can think, lip locked with the miracle standing before you, getting lost in this fantasy with you is,

 he’s the rain that overcomes the scarcest drought.

-

It’s been a month since you’ve seen him. Packing up your bookbag, you sling it in the back seat, making your way to the driver’s side, igniting the engine before heading onto the road to home. Oddly enough, Yoongi hasn’t texted you all morning which is highly unlike him. With it being Friday though, you assume maybe he has a test this morning he hasn’t finished up. Or, maybe he’s having a talk with a professor about a homework assignment he needs clarification on. Many thoughts are running through your mind, and even when you make it home, cleaning your room and tidying up the house for your mom, you every now and then glance at your phone, just for your heart to fall every time.

Though it’s late afternoon, you yawn in frustration, trying to avoid the overbearing worries wanting to overtake your mind. Instead, you force yourself to take a break, burying your body underneath the covers, far enough to where your head is comfortably nestled on your pillow. Though you plan to just lay there in the silence, slumber sneaks up on you, your eyelids shutting in hopes of forgetting about the sadness echoing in your heart.

-

Crickets chirp all around intermingled with frequent yelps from coyotes making their presence known underneath the extensive night holding a myriad of stars. The wind breezes above your frames, warm fingers interlaced with yours, backs pressed to the cooled dirt letting the music of the cicadas bring comfort to the atmosphere. You’ve never been so at peace, not in the desert with the answer to diminish the turmoil resting beside you. Cacti stand tall through out the area, their spikes glistening beneath the moon, pink and yellow flowers adorning the tips of their arms, small clumps of vegetation ornamenting in between.

Though the constellations above pique your awareness, there’s nothing you want more than to gaze at the heavenly being whose eyes have yet to leave you ever since your dream began. Timidly, you return his gape, squeezing his fingers lovingly, feeling the tip of his thumb smoothing over the back of your hand. If this is what it’s like to be whole again, then there is no way you want to lose it. When a fond smirk embellishes his thin lips, your hand trails along his chest, you move to hover above him, his hands immediately resting at the base of your back the second your lips brush his. Cupping his cheeks, you feel his hair between your fingers, the sensation of his kiss quenching every craving you’ve ever had for water, especially when rain drops quid the terrain- showering both of you without warning. Neither of you mind, in fact, both of you remain tangled in fauna, getting lost in each other’s kiss, and getting lost in endless time.

-

Your eyes are welcomed by the night outside your window prompting you to groggily sit up, rubbing at your eyes whilst letting out a long yawn. Running to the restroom, you freshen up, brushing your teeth and walking to the living room to realize your mother left a note saying her and your dad will be home late. The nap you took seems to have helped with the fatigue you felt earlier, and though you have the urge to check your phone, you decide against it, pouring yourself a glass of your favorite drink and nestling onto the couch.

When the doorbell sounds, your eyebrows crease, you set your drink aside, cautiously walking to the door, your heart thudding even in your temples. Opening the door, you nearly shout with excitement, for standing before you, is none other than your boyfriend, Min Yoongi, with a bouquet of deep red roses staring right back at you.

“Oh my god, Yoongi!” You squeal, him chuckling as you crash into his arms. He spins you around once, letting your feet settle onto the ground with your face buried deep into his chest as he sways you from side to side. The crinkling from the plastic covering the stems of the roses is hardly heard while you rattle off, emotions escaping from all sides, “I was so upset because I hadn’t heard from you all day and I was worried and I just wanted to cry and-”You barely get a breath in from your rant to the point you didn’t notice him inching close to you, pressing his lips to yours, silencing you suddenly. Gasping lightly between his kiss, you melt into his embrace, getting entranced by how much you have missed him.

When he pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours, “I wanted to surprise you.”

“Well,” you retort, refusing to take your eyes off his handsome face, “Mission accomplished. I haven’t showered and we approximately have 41 minutes until my parents potentially come home.”

Yoongi laughs as he holds you again. “Alrighty, I’ll be waiting.” He kisses your temple before heading to the living room. Your heart is swollen with excitement that your boyfriend is finally back.

Hot water pangs along your shivering skin, roasting your frame just enough to make the goosebumps wave among your limbs when you finally enter the shower. The shampoo drizzles down your shoulders, your fingers brushing through your soaked hair while you cleanse your body from the long sleep prior to Yoongi’s unexpected arrival. It doesn’t take long before you’re wrapped in a towel, trying to be conscious of the time before your parents get home. The ends of your hair cling to your shoulders while the cool air wisps across your exposed shoulders and legs. Looking into the mirror, you swiftly run a hairbrush through the mild tangles to then waltzing into your bedroom to sift through your drawers for clean pajamas.

You nearly gasp in surprise when thin fingers drape from behind you, burying his nose within your freshly cleaned hair. “Well, you surprised me once and now it’s twice,” You tilt your head, a smile spreading across your face as you melt into his arms. Yoongi moves to press his cheek to the side of your neck, his strands tickling your skin while he sways you gently from side to side.

“I just really missed you,” he whispers, moving his lips to press against the corner of your jaw. With opposite college schedules, sometimes it’s hard for the two of you to spend quality time together. Yoongi pecks another warm kiss along your shoulder which distracts you just enough for your words to melt on your tongue. “I just can’t get enough of you,” he squeezes you once, your heart fluttering at his sweet words.

“Mmm,” you moan dreamily, “I concur,”

It’s then you crave the love you two haven’t been able to make in what feels like forever and if your correct, you may now have 25 minutes until your parents get home; prodding your fingertips along Yoongi’s hands, you soothingly tickle at his skin, carefully swaying your ass against his growing erection. When a tepid, pout of a kiss greets the back of your neck, tingles broad every millimeter of your skin, a light hum sounding from your lips. Your heat squeezes with anticipation, especially when Yoongi undoes your towel to where it plops to the ground. With his large, heated hands he slowly palms along your hips until his fingertips rest above your clit; his other hand sliding to your breasts, his middle finger and thumb circling along your nipples while he simultaneously massages your throbbing sense; your head leans back to rest upon his shoulder. Eyes closing in immense enjoyment, you can’t help but moan his name, “Yoooongi,” especially with the budding arousal arising within your core. Yoongi’s lips trace your neck in very detailed, seductive kisses; slipping his vibrating fingers to dive in the ocean flowing between your folds causing him to lean his hips into your ass; the feel of his erection prompting you to bite your bottom lip, a sly smirk forming while he continues to pleasure you.

Abruptly turning to face him, you help him out of his clothes, crouching to your knees to pull off his pants; his warm skin knocking the breath out of you as the two of you envelop each other in a sultry embrace; his lips finding yours almost immediately; parting and relocking in such a fast pace, you’re hardly containing yourself, especially when you tighten your arms behind his neck just to relish in the feel of each of your naked chests pressing together to intensify the paradise you two so easily bestow on one another.

“Holy shit, I’ve really fucking missed you,” Yoongi breathes, his tongue brushing yours before snatching your lips once again, his hands moving to squeeze your ass before slamming your back against the dresser drawers. A high-pitched gasp releases from your agape mouth, his fingers slide within your walls, curling slightly to find your g-spot, your eyes rolling back while he pumps; your slippery folds tempting to bring him to his knees, especially when you bring your hand to his being, gliding rapidly up and down. His lips pause against yours, breaths panting in unison from the growing climax, but it’s only the beginning. You want to be on the bed, and you want him underneath you without any doubt.

It doesn’t take long for him to read your mind, especially when you shove him toward the bed, him crawling backward before he collapses onto the pillows. Your heat comfortably sits upon his erection, grinding slowly for a tease while he groans in response. Arousing him arouses you, and when your hands knowingly soothe along his abdomen, your mouth waters at his light tufts sticking to the perspiration forming along the line of his forehead. His jaw clenches to control himself from sexing you so rough that you’ll forget your name; yet, he enjoys taking his time, making sure you’re enjoying every bit of this as much as he is.

His fingertips rest on your knuckles that have chosen a spot to rest on his thighs; when your head moves in view of his being, your eyes widen in excitement before hungrily licking along his shaft. He jolts his being unintentional as a slow, deep moan of pleasure leaves his heaving lips. He knows that you know exactly what you’re planning to do; grazing your tongue effortlessly along his tip, you tighten your lips over the head, taking one, long suck before accepting all he is within your mouth. “Holy shit, [Y/N],” he exhales, your head bobbing up and down numerously, not breaking away anytime soon, drooling all over his being whilst sucking; the salty taste of his precum igniting a hunger in you that you didn’t realize you missed. Once his erection is drenched from your skilled mouth, you hover above him to steal a few more sloppy kisses, tongues pirouetting in perfect sync- when he hears your gasps, he rises suddenly, to move to reposition behind you-you remaining on your hands and knees, but he does the opposite of what you expect. His fingers spread your folds as your scent drowns him in ecstasy.

Your core clenches before its greeted by the harsh swivels of his tongue; your arms weakening from the sensation before he shoves his tongue within your vaginal walls, pumping profusely until your thighs tremble in return. Licking with the tip of his tongue he returns to flick it along your vaginal lips, glorifying in your screams of delight, beckoning him to continue, sucking your clit in multiple streaks, an orgasm building to the point you become increasingly light-headed.

“Yoongi,” you moan, so breathless from how brilliant he performs his tricks, your climax wanting to peak, but you stop him, “Yoongi, please,” you beg, ready to be fucked so hard you forget where you are, “Yoongi,” your pleas are about to be answered. When your back bounces among the mattress, Yoongi hooks your legs over his shoulders one at a time before bringing the head of his erection to your heat. Your entrance is moving instantaneously with your pulse, yearning and yearning to be satisfied. Without any hesitation, Yoongi dives inside you, thrusting severely within your core- his being so deep within you, your head is reeling from how incredible he feels, pounding vigorously to the point you can’t catch a breath. Your liquids forming between your thighs cover his erection with every stroke, his hair swaying over his eyes while he performs his task; the two of you so enchanted by the way your bodies fit; the way the halves of your hearts fit; the way your hands intertwine perfectly, the way you two so naturally complete every aspect of each other. The love both of you hold for one another is endless.

When the climax peaks, you whimper his name, your legs tensing from the powerful jolt leading to sensitivity plaguing your entrance. Yoongi spills into you, his hips jerking. His release melting onto your inner thighs, him crashing beside you; both hyperventilating with accomplished smiles adorning your faces.

“Wow,” you breathe, “I think you need to surprise me more often,” turning on your side, before snaking your leg over his waist. His fingers move to trace the side of your arm, him inching closer to press a loving kiss upon your lips. Staring into his brown eyes, you whisper, “I’ve missed you so much,” and really that’s all you two can explain; because no matter where either of you are; even if you’re in separate rooms, there’s nothing that compares to the anticipation of getting to be within each other’s arms, cherishing countenances and kissing away the fear of losing a love that will never be lost.

Now you have approximately five minutes to get dressed.

Pairing: animalrehabilitator!jungkook x flowershop!reader, s2l!au

Vegetation. Red tomatoes dangle from their stems in countless rows before you, encircled by thick, plush trees. The vegetation surrounding the scene abundant that the sun barely shines above it instead remains covered leaving shadows of swaying leaves along the ground. Yellow butterflies flutter amongst the grass, landing on colorful flowers spread across the land. Faintly, you hear cautious hooves rummaging through the forest, the movements lightly crunch along the piles of leaves though you hardly register what it may be. Taking a step forward, your fingertips brush one of the shiny, plump fruits, the red glistening beneath what little sun is protruding through.

The dirt beneath your feet indents leaving a trail of your journey behind you. Gazing at the tomatoes, you’re in awe of how a simple seed can grow into something so beautiful along with many other plants that enrapture your soul. When the field of tomatoes seems to come to an end, a bright light piques your attention, your feet shifting onto freshly mowed grass. Something about the light really draws you in, especially with it nearly blinding you. Inwardly, you urge yourself to continue forward, your hand resting above your forehead to dim some of the brightness.

A large tree appears in your vision once your eyes adjust, mossy patches gather along the end of the trunk, a gray stone rests above where the tree roots are buried deep into the earth. Your eyes pan over the sight until they land upon a figure dawned in white clothing, back leaned against the stone, fingers fiddling with what looks to be a flower. You tilt your head, consumed with the way his eyes remain focused on the floret, his thin lips murmuring to himself with each petal he removes, them swaying to the ground or onto his raised knees, and noting his soft pink hair waving on his forehead and long enough to cover the tips of his ears.

The entire moment is angelic to you. Heavenly in a sense. His countenance without the knowledge of your presence moves you to the point you want to call his name. If only, you realize, you knew it. When he reaches the final petal, you instinctively step forward, your lips parted in preparation to speak when the jolt of a doe breaks your concentration, the boy lifting his head with widened eyes, turning to see who has entered-

-

Running a few errands, you forgot to bring a water bottle along with you which primes you to run by a dollar store with the plan of purchasing water as well as a few other things before returning home. For some reason, you are extremely thirsty today, the summer sun hasn’t given a break enough to be able to breathe properly. Either way, you’re thankful for your day off, though you can’t wait to return to work tomorrow. The greenhouse you work in on the weekends has been a dream, holding numerous flowers, other buildings holding different vegetables or fruits, a backyard filled with a cornfield and a strawberry field- the plantation so immense that it gained popularity from the folks living in your small town. Every employee is assigned certain positions. Yours happens to be with the flowers, though your coworkers love surprising you with baskets of vegetables or fruit whenever there’s a lot left over after the harvests.

Monday through Thursday though, you work in an antique shop as a manager. You’re the biggest workaholic you know, but art, plants, and the realms of nature have been your passions your whole life.  Walking along the isles, you finish retrieving what little items you need, and you head to the register. You’re uncertain of why your head feels so foggy, but once you pay for your items, you waltz out the door, zipping your wallet and placing it in your pocket.

“Ma’am!” Someone calls, “Ma’am wait!”

It takes you a moment to realize that the deep voice is calling for you. Turning around, you see someone approaching you, waving an arm in the air until they capture your attention, the sound of a plastic bag clashing with each step.

“Sorry, ma’am. You left this,” Your eyes land on the bag holding the items you just bought. Embarrassment immediately flooding your features.

“Oh, my word,” you breathe, reaching for the bag, “Thank you so much, I can’t believe I left without-”

Your heart halts when the familiarity of the man’s pink hair floods your vision. Bright, brown eyes meet yours, your shoulders tensing at the recognition of his face. Someone that appeared in your dreams the night before.

“It’s no problem at all,” He smiles, his eyes timidly keep your gaze, his hand falling to the side once the bag is hanging from your stiff digits.

With a terse nod, you grin, “I hope you have a nice day.” Your heart pounds as you brisk to your car, the strangeness of the whole situation nearly floors you. Have you seen him before? Is that why he somehow crept into your dreams? Either way, you buckle your seatbelt, igniting the engine and driving toward your home, brushing off the whole thing as nothing more than just a mere coincidence.  

-

 Maize stalks aim for the sky, the leaves tickling your figure with the light breeze whisking between the greenery. The golden cobs peek from where they’re held, the sky a light blue as cirrostratus clouds hover in sight. Your fingertips brush the smooth, yet numerous rows of kernels amazed by the beauty of such a grain- how they grow in rows to feed the world along with many other plants. You spring forward, skipping through the cornfield to find an entrance to the shining light ahead. When you find yourself exiting your previous adventure, the scene before you is breathtaking- the sun brightening the earth as you notice the vacant tree with the stone sitting next to it appearing in your peripherals.

What captures your vision brings a small smile on your parted lips. A lone doe grazes along the grass, her light brown fur evident amongst the colors of plantation. As if aware, she raises her head, flicking her ears as the wind picks up- her black nose twitches, abruptly turning her head to meet your entranced stare. The doe stiffens at the discovery of your company, but remains in place, firmly planted in the one dwelling where she feels safe.

“It’s okay,” you try to speak, but no words are heard- raising your hand just enough to show her you will not do anything to hurt her. The doe’s eyes stay locked on your countenance, even when pink flower petals softly brush your skin. With furrowed eyebrows, you lift your head to see a shower of them falling from the sky in slow motion, covering the terrain like a blanket of snow. When you turn to find the doe, she’s gone. Your assumption is she skittishly ran away which brings an ache to your heart, but you understand her instinct for flight. The sunlight trails to the tree and stone- beyond them your eyes see him. The silhouette dressed in white- his back facing you, yellow butterflies sparsely cling to his clothing, their wings fluttering just enough to enchant the air with their magic. When his figure shifts, you see his hands are raised in front of his chest, his fingers poised as you see two butterflies resting on them. His vision never leaves their beating wings, smiling down at them with the mindset of friendship. You want nothing more than to join him, basking in the glory of the sunshine and the gentle nature of the butterflies, the frolicking of deer in the yonder fields, and catching flower petals replacing rain.

You watch him carefully, not realizing the forward motion you’re making. Nearing him, a butterfly flutters from his shoulder to fly in your direction, the man turns to follow the insect - eyes enlarging in surprise when he sees who its travelling to-

-

Watering the daisy section brings the conversant scent of water and dirt, a fragrance you never want to lose. Reds, pinks, yellows, blues, and purples brighten the greenhouse, a few fans above bring a cooling breeze to the plants, along with relief from the humidity lingering outside. You love the smell of plants which is why you’re thankful you only work here on weekends, that way everything remains fresh with every shift. You saunter to the rose section, taking a whiff of one of the deep red emblems with a smile spreading across your face. You’re so mesmerized by the essence; you hardly notice the door closing signifying a customer is in the midst. You reach to sniff a pink rose this time, a low hum sounding in your throat.

“Hello, I came to see if-”

Your hand flies to your chest as your eyes widen- the thrumming of your heart evident.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” the deep voice says, which then you apologize for jumping like you did. When you raise your head to meet the customer, you freeze. It’s the same person who not only appears in your dreams but is also the same person who rescued you from leaving purchased items behind.

“It’s okay,” you reply, gaining your composure, “How can I help you?” You smile, trying to ignore the faint attraction withering within you. You notice he squints his eyes at you in wonderment, trying to figure out where he may have seen you.

“You’re the one from yesterday,” he then says, snapping his fingers then shyly chuckling, not meaning to avoid your question, “I remember now. I didn’t know you work here.” 

“Just on weekends,” you nod, your demeanor timid when he tilts his head with interest.

“Are you in college?”

“Oh no, this is actually my second job. I’m a manager of an antique shop,” you mention, then pondering what brings this handsome stranger to the greenhouse of all places. “What about you?”

“I work at a wildlife rehab center.” He grins, your eyebrows raising in surprise, “I work with animals that have been injured, or animals that were found abandoned as neonates, so we raise or rehabilitate them until they can be released.”

“That’s- that’s amazing,” you stutter, the memory of your latest vision clouding your mind. The face of the doe flashes, and you can’t help the astonishment on how much your dreams of this stranger align with his reality.

“Recently, we released a doe we rehabilitated from a wounded leg,” he murmurs, sadness in his brown eyes as he slips his hands in his pockets. “I just hope she doesn’t go through anything like that again.” You’re uncertain of what to say other than apologizing once again, though you’re very happy to hear of her healing, also hoping she remains in good shape and health for the rest of her life. “By the way, I’m Jungkook.” He offers his hand, formally introducing himself.

“I’m [Y/N],” you say, firmly gripping his warm hand in yours with a swift shake.

“Sorry, for the distraction. As far as why I’m here, I’m wanting to send a floral arrangement to my mom’s work.” He grins, revealing what flowers he would like and rattling off the address as you swiftly type up everything, packaging the flowers neatly, and Jungkook signing the store copy of his receipt.

Before he turns to leave, he glances at you one more time, his diffident expression imaging yours,

“It’s very nice to meet you.”

You’re flattered especially when he slightly bows in respect to you.

“It’s very nice to meet you, too,” you bow in return, Jungkook nodding sweetly, soon disappearing out the door, your thumping heart still echoing in the atmosphere.

-

Strawberries. Vertical lines of strawberries decorate the ground, the triangular shaped fruits appetizing as you prick one loose from its stem, the sweet taste of it satisfying as you close your eyes. You’re not sure how many you’ve eaten, but you can’t seem to get enough as you follow through the field until you reach the opening where the meadow no longer bears fruit. Your lips are stained pink from the binge, though you can’t see it, you can feel it, especially when the craving for more remains on your mind.

Glancing ahead, you pause, your smile widening at two deer frolicking a distance away from you. The two playing at each other as they bounce in different directions- completely in their own little world unbeknownst of your presence. When a tap on your shoulder causes you to gasp, you whirl around to see the wide-eyed gaze of the pink haired gentleman. Apologetically, he stares at you, his lips parted for he didn’t mean to frighten you. Bringing a finger to your lips, he follows your gaze to the deer dancing behind you, his heart melting along with yours at the view.

When you turn to face him once again, it’s like the world around the two of you disappears, just two individuals lost in a large world, yet held together by the nature that brings happiness to each of your lives. He raises his hand, swallowing in fear, gently settling his palm along your cheek, the softness of his skin soothing to you as your fingertips brush his wrist. He inches closer, pausing just enough to where his breath sweeps along your lips, the desire building nearly knocking you off your feet.

When you close your eyes waiting for his kiss, he speaks,

“Love me or love me not-”

-

You’ve always been incredibly shy. Which is something you’ve accepted about yourself a long time ago; you decide as you carve at the wood you’ve been working on the past week. It’s starting to resemble a deer, the ones appearing in your dreams almost every night since your first dream about Jungkook. Your coworker is tidying up the floor, taking care of customers, checking in on you from time to time to make sure your current projects are turning out the way you’ve hoped. As you whittle at the timber, you smile fondly at it, proud at the detail you’re able to create.

It’s just- as you twirl the current piece in your hand, you elect to not sell it. Instead, you originally created this project with a different intention. Courage revealing itself, you finally conclude that you’re no longer going to cower. Taking a quick break, you lean back in your chair, excited for the following weekend to arrive.

-

Shrubbery surrounds you though in the distance clusters of blueberries bring a peaceful feel to the ether, the dark blue reflecting beautifully with the green stems. You sprint toward the fruit, the sun following you as you twirl with the heat of the breeze. Monarch butterflies flap their orange wings, swarms of them tackling the bushes to enhance the scenery with their aura. If rain existed in this world, you’d never know, not with the sun bringing such a euphoric feel to this world you love to escape to.

Laughing joyously, you skip through the blueberry field until you appear in the meadow, the grass tickling your ankles, your heart searching for the constant who gives you a sense of sanity. Without missing a step, you turn to see him, shining so vividly in his white attire, you’re nearly breathless when you reach him, tapping his shoulder, him facing you with wide eyes- he relaxes when he sees it’s you. He gulps, shifting his gaze momentarily before returning to meet yours.

There’s nothing you want more than him. This longing for him doesn’t make any sense with him being a stranger, but when do visions from deep slumber ever do?  You reach for his hand, resting his palm upon your cheek, him closing the gap between you two just enough to where the tip of his nose brushes your cheek. You know what’s coming when his lips part, but it’s not a kiss he’s about to give,

“Love me or love me not?” he mouths, but you don’t answer with words.

Instead, you smile, reaching your free hand to cup his cheek, leaving a soft peck on his lips. In that one second, something powerful astounds you, and you pull away breathless. Without hesitation, he kisses you again, the trampling of a multitude of hooves sound in the distance, the rush prevailing like the bravery exuberating from you. Kissing him once more, both of your hearts beating to the rhythm of the hooves, the gentle touches of falling flower petals encompass in a kaleidoscope of colors, vegetation blooming luxuriously across the land. As he wraps his arms tight around your back, your arms rest around his shoulders, letting the sounds of earth envelop the two of you in a blissful imagination.

-

Weeks pass before you ever see him again. Twirling along the different sections, you’ve already watered the plants for the day, helping a few stragglers here and there until you find a moment of peace. The dream you dreamed has you in a daze you can’t explain, but something about this human enchants you in such a way that you can’t seem to think of anything else but him. As the hours tick by, you lean across the register in hopes that a crowd will bustle through the doors, but nothing of the sort happens. When closing time nears, you begin to check on everything until the sound of the door alerts you that someone has entered the facility.

Turning on a heel, you nearly faint when you see the light pink hair of Jungkook, looking around the store, before his eyes land on you.

“Hello,” you greet with a small wave, “How are you?”

His lips pull into a side grin revealing small dimples you never knew he had. You approach him slowly, folding your arms across your chest as you timidly pause next to the register.

“I’m doing well,” he says, “How are you?”

“I’m doing well, too,” you say, the two of you trying to gather words to speak, but neither of you seem to be able to let it out.

“How’s work-”

“How’s the flow-”

The both of you begin simultaneously, chuckling at the awkward situation.

“You first,” he smiles widely, your heart fluttering in reaction.

“How’s work?” You repeat, Jungkook nodding as he replies.

“Good. I got to see the deer we rehabilitated the other day,” his eyes light up, “Decided to visit the meadow not far from here, and there she was.”

What he said sparks the reminder of what you’ve been waiting to give him for weeks now.

“One sec,” you lift a finger, turning to ruffle through your purse until the wooden figurine is within your hand. Facing Jungkook, a timid smile adorns your lips, his eyes widening in sweet surprise as you lift the wooden figurine of the doe in his line of vision. “I know we hardly know each other. But what you do for animals, and your story, really inspired me. So, I want you to have this,” you hand the carved doe to him, his fingertips brushing yours as he accepts it, his mouth ajar.

“Th-thank you,” he breathes, “It’s perfect. You made this yourself?” You nod, him continuing to express his amazement at your talent. After a few moments, he then lifts his head, his pink hair covering his forehead, silver earrings exposed from the tufts of hair fluffing over the tips of his ears. “I don’t know what time you get off work, but if you’re up for it, I’d love to show you the meadow.” Jungkook’s eyes are hopeful as he holds yours, your heart melting in return. “Maybe we will get to see her again, too.”

“Honestly,” you begin, your gaze never faltering from his kind, brown eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of missing it.”

[boldlyvoid]

Little Miss Sunshine

Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson

Summary: 9 months after the big game, steve is handed his daughter to raise all alone... or so he thinks.

Warnings: single dad!steve, stress crying, newborn panic, money problems, talks of steves past with his parents, past child neglect, mutual pining, friends to lovers

Word Count: 6.7k

After the earthquake, and the plethora of other terrible things in Hawkins, Steve’s parents decided they didn’t want to return. The house wasn’t worth it to them, and the memories that came with their belongings didn’t mean anything anymore either, so they left it all to Steve. He took on the bills and the land taxes but other than that, it was a great deal in his eyes. 

Eddie moved in almost as soon as Steve was signing the deed to the house, Wayne lived there for a bit too while he waited for a new trailer to be covered by his insurance. It was really nice. Wayne liked cooking in a real kitchen, they had a big dinner on Sundays when they watched football together and Eddie loved using the whole basement for both his band practice and his d&d games. They moved around the house like they had always been there, Steve honestly wishes they were. 

Robin was over all the time, and basically everyone else Steve was close to. His door was never closed, whoever needed a safe space was welcome in Steve’s home. He promised the only yelling going on inside its walls would be from excitement and the only violence would occur in their board games. Everyone respected the rules, and the home was filled with more laughter than anything else. 

Joyce helped him take a bunch of his photos and blow them up to replace the framed photos of his parents all around. Jonathan and Nancy helped him repaint some of the rooms before they broke up and then it was just him and Jonathan painting… it was weird at first, but it turns out they had a lot more in common than just a broken heart. Will was over a lot too, being the newest hellfire member he did a lot of character-building with Eddie, trying to fit him into the world he had already built with the other guys as seamlessly as possible. 

When Max gets out of the hospital Steve spends a lot of time at her trailer with her, he takes her to follow-up appointments and brings her groceries once a week. But every day that he’s there he basically acts as her nurse, making her lunches, washing her clothes and putting them out on the line, anything. A large part of it is because he feels as though it’s his fault she was so hurt, the rest is simply because he loves her like family and has since the first day he met her. She saved his life, he was going to make hers liveable. 

Robin moved in right after she graduated, which made it very hard for her to hide what was going on with her and Nancy… they spent the spring getting to know each other and the summer memorizing every inch of each other. By the fall, however, Nancy moved off to college while Robin stayed back for a year to make some money, spending most of what she was trying to save on the phone bill to talk to Nancy all the time. 

Bills were hard to pay for a bit before robin moved in, he was working only 6 hours a day all 7 days a week and coming home with $241, it covered his portion of the electric bill but then he had to think about the winter coming and the cost of keeping the house heated… Eddie was still selling drugs and waiting for the right time to move into getting a real job. Robin on the other hand, still worked at Family Video as well as the arcade now, doing days with the games and spending her nights with Steve and the VHS tapes. 

They were doing okay, they were making it through being independent adults, and then She showed up. 

The night of the big game, back in March, the 21st to be exact… he slept with Brenda after the afterparty and drove her home the next morning before going to work. Now it’s 9 months later and she’s explaining to him how he got her pregnant and she didn’t know until it was too late because she was too focused on her senior year. And not dying like most of her classmates, honestly. 

She hands him a baby carrier with a little tiny baby inside it, “she’s 100 percent yours, Steve, you can do a test if you don’t believe me…”

“So, you want to co-parent or something?” He offers, taking the car seat and placing it on the table in his foyer so he can unstrap her and hold her close to his chest. He may not have known she was coming, there aren't any maternal instincts in him, and yet he knows exactly how to hold her and shush her so she doesn’t cry as he holds her. 

“No… I don’t want her at all,” she whispers, trying not to cry with how ashamed she feels about making this big decision for herself. “I deferred to the winter semester at my college, I’m going next month, I can’t be a mom and go to school. I’m not old enough to be a mom. I can’t do it.” 

“Okay,” he doesn’t even think twice about it. He simply looks down at his little girl with a smile, “do you want updates? Photos?” 

She shakes her head, but he’s not even looking at her. “no… uh, here’s the birth certificate forms, they have to be sent in and filed but I thought you’d want to pick her name and sign it yourself.” 

“Did you?” His brows raise, realizing how serious she is about not wanting to be in her life at all. 

She shakes her head, “no. You can tell her about me some day, but, I can’t do it. I’ve never wanted to be a mom, Steve.” 

“Do what’s best for you, Brenda,” he shoots her an honest, compassionate smile. “I don’t blame you. And I’m sorry I wasn’t there to support you.” 

“I just didn’t want you to think you had to marry me or something,” she admits, she places the papers on the table beside the car seat and backs up towards the door again. “My parents know I’m doing this too, they don’t really agree, but they get it. So, if you ever need anything, I’m sure my mom would be able to help you.” 

“Okay,” he doesn’t really know anything about a baby. He was going to need a lot of help. That’s when the panic starts to set in. “yeah… okay, thanks.” 

“I’m sorry, Steve,” she says one final time and then she’s gone, getting back in her dad's car and pulling out of his driveway.  

He was supposed to go see Max, Robin isn’t home and Eddie’s probably sound asleep still in his room downstairs… it’s just him and this tiny, defenceless, clueless newborn.

She’s adorable and small, she has his nose, and when he pulls back the little pink cap, she has a thick head of hair too. His mind starts to run as he looks at all the things Brenda left with her. A simple bag of baby necessities from the hospital, 2 outfits, the car seat and the blanket she’s in. It’s not much. It’s honestly nothing. 

His mind starts to run and wonder about how the fuck he was going to do this… he barely had the money for his groceries, how was he now going to buy clothes and a crib and formula and diapers? 

He takes her with him into the living room and sits down on the couch with her in his arms, careful as ever while simultaneously the most stressed he’s ever been. 

From the time he’s spent in Nancy’s basement, he knows there’s an old crib down there from when Mrs. Wheeler had Holly… and they have tubs and tubs of old baby clothes in the garage, waiting for when Nancy or Mike had a baby one day. He picks up the phone on the side table, dialling the Wheeler's number that he knows by heart, unsure how he should ask but he knows he needs help. 

Most women would say it takes a village, so why not go to his and ask? 

“Hello?” Karen's sweet mom voice answers. 

“Hi, Mrs. Wheeler, uh, it’s Steve, Steve Harrington?” 

“Oh, hello Steve, what can I do for you?” She’s as lovely as always. 

“um… this is going to sound crazy but I have a daughter, her mom isn’t in the picture, she doesn’t want to be, and I have nothing to—

“Steve, sweetheart, I’d love to help,” she stops him before he gets too deep into the ramble. “What do you have for her already?” 

“A car seat,” he starts to cry, looking down at her, scared and stressed. “I don’t know what I’m doing here, Karen… and I figured with holly only being 6, you’d still have some stuff I could buy off you?” 

“Honey, you can have it,” she’s sure about that. “I’ll see what I have, I’ll talk to the neighbours too, they have babies of all ages… how old is she so I know for sizes?” 

“Newborn, like 3 days old? I just got her,” he can’t even believe the words leaving his mouth. “She’s tiny.” 

“Oh wow, okay, are you okay with me telling people about you, or should I just say it’s a new parent in the area?” She’s considerate, knowing a new baby and being a single dad are both very hard things to deal with alone without the court of public opinion involved too. 

“You can tell Joyce and Claudia, and Lucas’s mom too, but I think I want this to just be in my circle of people for a bit, you know?” 

“I get it,” she’s super nice about it. Nicer than he could’ve ever imagined. “I’ll call you back in just a minute okay, I’m going to have someone come over with formula and then I’ll be over in an hour or so with a crib, okay?” 

“Thank you so much, really Karen, thank you,” he tries not to cry again, feeling more supported than ever before. 

Within 10 minutes there’s a knock at the door. Joyce rushes in with a few bags of things, “I just grabbed whatever they had at Bradley's, how is she?” 

“Good, she’s really quiet?” He shares, thinking it’s strange. She’s been quiet in his arms, awake and aware as she looks around with her deep blue eyes, blinking heavily as she adjusts to the world. 

Joyce sets everything down in the kitchen and washes her hands quickly before turning to him, “can I see her?” 

He nods, handing her over carefully, “I don’t have a name for her or anything yet… her mom didn’t name her at the hospital or anything.” 

“Oh hello, sweet girl,” she coos as she takes the little baby in her arms. “Steve, she’s so precious… how are you feeling?” 

“Well, I fought monsters from another dimension so I feel like this should be a bit easier… but I’m terrified,” he’s able to laugh, hands on his hips as he watches her hold his baby.

His baby. 

It didn’t take long for his mind to accept that he had a child, he felt nervous watching someone else hold her but he knew another mom was the safest option. Joyce would’ve killed for Will, and Jonathan if the same thing happened to him, so he knew his daughter was in good hands. literally. 

Joyce sniffs the baby, both her head and her diaper to see if she needs a change. He knew she was going to have to teach him how to change one, and how to make her bottles and how to put her car seat in his car… “what the heck am I doing, Joyce?” 

“Here,” Joyce hands her back to him and starts taking everything out of the paper grocery bags on his countertop. “So I got some formula, this is the brand I used with Will and these are the bottles I thought were the best 14 years ago… I’m sure they’re still good now.” 

“I’m sure,” he agrees, watching carefully as she takes them out of the packaging and makes her way to the sink. 

“Everything has to be sanitized and you can’t use regular tap water to mix with the formula, bottled is best but if you have to use the tap then you should boil it first,” she explains, running the hot water in his sink to fill up a bowl of water. “When you wash the bottles, it’s best to do them in a plastic basin or bowl so that the sink doesn’t contaminate what you’re trying to clean.” 

“Got it, everything has to be hospital quality,” he makes a joke, sanitizing wasn’t something he even thought of when it came to a baby but it made sense. 

“As babies grow they need different amounts of food, her tummy is only the size of a walnut right now, so she should only be having a few ounces every few hours. If she doesn’t finish everything in the bottle you have to throw it out, you can’t reuse it even if she doesn’t finish it.” 

She lets the bottles soak in the bowl for a minute, showing him the back of the tin of formula. She walks him through how the measuring works and explains how schedules are really important to having a baby. She explains how he’ll want to read some parenting books, he can call her any time he has questions, she lives just down the road and she’d drop everything for him, his family. 

When Karen shows up she has Ted's truck absolutely full of things. They set up a crib in Steve’s room, she has 3 totes of clothes labelled newborn, 1-3 and 3-6 months written on them. There’s a bunch of burb cloths and swaddle blankets, Karen teaches him how the car seat goes into and comes out of his car and where it can go safely. He’s overwhelmed with things and information, he’s bombarded with books and pamphlets and support groups. 

Karen offers to babysit while he’s at work, holding her close and swooning over how sweet she is. “Do you have any name ideas?” 

He shakes his head, “no… how did you pick your kids names?” 

“Well, as much as people think we picked Nancy because of Nancy drew, it’s actually my grandmother's name and Michael was Ted’s father's name, he passed a few months before we had Mike. Holly was conceived on Christmas, so it’s a little self-explanatory,” she can’t help but smile. “You’ll find something that means a lot to you, I’m sure.” 

Eddie comes up the stairs then, hair messy and PJs all wrinkled from a long night's rest, “what’s with all the foot traffic up here? You having a party without me, Stevie?” 

“Oh good, you’re up,” Steve is relieved, it’s a little after 1pm, “can you go to the trailer park and make sure Max has had lunch today?”

“yeah…” he agrees as he stops in the doorway of the kitchen, “who’s baby is that?” 

“Um, mine,” Steve admits, terrified again. “I have a daughter, apparently.” 

“With Nancy?” He jumps to conclusions seeing as Karen Wheeler was holding his baby. 

“No, no, no,” they both shake their heads, “no I just called them for help.” 

“Dude, what?” He rubs his eyes, thinking this is all some crazy dream. “Since when do you have a baby?” 

“Come here,” he takes Eddie by the elbow and leads him out of the room so he can tell him all the facts, not knowing Karen and Joyce are right by the doorway, listening in so they can gossip later. “I slept with Brenda Ross the night of the big game-- before all hell broke loose. She had a baby 3 days ago and didn’t want her, so she’s mine now. I get you don’t want to live in the same house as a screaming kid or whatever—

“I never said that,” Eddie cuts him off. “Don’t expect me to babysit it, but this is your house, she’s your kid, I’m sure it’ll be fine? Right?” 

He sighs, “god, I hope.” 

—

He takes her to work that night with a new diaper bag full of things and sets her on the counter in her car seat while he works. He switches off with Keith who doesn’t say much and about an hour into his shift, Robin clocks over from the arcade next door. 

“And who’s this?” She peeks into the car seat to see a sleeping newborn. 

“So, big news… Brenda had my baby, apparently.” 

She laughs, “funny, no seriously, is her mom in the bathroom or something?” 

“I’m 100 percent serious, Robin,” he stares at her with a straight face, nervous as all hell for her reaction. “Brenda and her mom dropped her off with me today and she doesn’t want to be in her life. She only has me now.” 

He watches robins face drop and for once in her life, she has no words. “Steve?” 

“I know,” he pinches the bridge of his nose so he doesn’t start crying again. “Um, Karen and Joyce gave me a bunch of stuff for her, I’m sure Nancy will already know about it when you call her later tonight.” 

“She always knew this would happen,” Robin scoffs, shaking her head in pure disbelief. “After your six little nuggets speech, she expected you to have at least 1 or 2 baby mamas, never thought you’d be a single dad, though.” 

“Me either,” he sighs. “She’s really good though for a newborn? She’s only cried a little when she was hungry and she fell asleep in the car, she’s pretty calm.” 

“Yeah, thats good,” she agrees but he can see the worry on her face. 

“You don’t think I can do it, do you?” 

“What?” She doesn’t know where he pulled that conclusion from. 

“I’m an idiot, I barely made it through high school, I never got into tech, we work at this place and make barely nothing for all the time we spend here and now I have a baby. Tell me how it’s not going to work out, tell me I’m in over my head and I should just drop her off at the fire station,” he lets all his insecurities fall out

She pulls him into a hug and holds him close, she soothes a hand down his back with one hand and cradles his head with the other. “Steve, you’re not an idiot. You’re not a failure. You’re not going to be like your dad.” 

He finally breaks, crying into her shoulder as he holds her back. “It’s okay, Stevie, let it all out,” she keeps rubbing his back, “I can’t imagine how stressful today was… but I also can’t wait to hear about it later?” 

He pulls back and wipes his tears off his face and takes a deep breath after a few sniffles. “Sorry… and thanks, it’s been a bit overwhelming t say the least. Joyce taught me a bunch of stuff about bottles and Karen gave me some parenting books, so when she’s asleep later tonight I’ll probably be reading them.” 

“And if she doesn’t sleep?” Robin worries, “how are you going to keep up going to work and watching her?” 

He shrugs, “Karen offered to babysit… I just didn’t want to part with her tonight and I couldn’t call out, and if she likes it maybe I'll bring her often?” 

“Is it real?” She asks as if he can read her mind. “Love at first sight?” 

He nods, “oh yeah, I didn’t even blink twice when Brenda said she was mine, I was more sad knowing she didn’t want her. I know what that’s like… I don’t want her to feel unwanted one day.” 

“She won’t,” Robin knows that for sure. “She’s got you, me, and I’m sure once she’s more fun, Eddie will come around.” 

“He said he didn’t want to babysit her, but he’s got no problem living with her, so I don’t have to worry about him leaving me,” he admits yet another fear that’s been on his mind. 

“You worried about that?” 

He nods, unsure how to explain it. “He’s one of my best friends.” 

“Mhm,” she smirks, reading between the lines for all the things he won’t say, but they’re there in his eyes. 

—

The first week is a transition for sure, he has a hell of a time explaining it to all the kids and an even harder time fighting off all their name suggestions. The most difficult part was not sleeping, but he’s mostly used to that with the nightmares he gets, anyway. 

They wake up together every 3 hours, Steve has a bottle-making station in his room and a changing station on his dresser. Her crib is right beside his bed but she spends most of her time sleeping on him. She enjoys the warmth of his chest, they bond quickly and he feels like he knows her as the days go on. He can tell what her sounds mean, which cry means she needs to burp and which one means she can't feel him anymore and requires his closeness to feel safe. 

But he doesn’t know this cry… she’s been crying for an hour now and because he feels bad about keeping robin up, he’s taken her down to the kitchen, on the other side of the house, to rock her and shush her and try and make it stop. 

Eddie eventually drags himself upstairs and away from whatever he was doing to see if they were okay. He finds Steve crying as he holds her, whispering that it’s okay and she can stop crying now, but his fear only perpetuates hers. 

Something in Eddie breaks, he went from not wanting anything to do with Harrington's hook-up baby to walking over and taking her from his arms carefully. “Hey, it’s okay, take a break, Stevie.” 

“I don’t know why she won’t stop crying,” he sounds so broken, so tired, just completely drained. 

Eddie’s never held a baby before, but copying other people is easy for him. He places his arms in the same position Steve had his before, cradling the tiny human carefully but with enough support to feel secure. “It’s okay… why don’t you go get her another bottle? I’ll hold her, it’s okay.” 

“Okay,” Steve wipes his tears off his face with the back of his hands and takes a few deep breaths. “Thank you, I’m sorry I didn't mean to wake you—

“Hey,” Eddie stops him, using his free hand to reach out and cup Steve’s cheek and bring his attention back to him. “I’m up till 5am anyway, my sleep schedule is horrible. You know that.” He explains while gently bobbing his body, relaxing the baby enough that her cry settles to a sad whimper.

“Still, you said you didn’t—

“You’re suffering,” he says what he’s thinking, pressing his lips together in an awkward smile. “I can’t let you suffer, go take a break, have a nap. Look, she’s fine?” He references down to her, she’s calming down now that Steve is calming down. “She was feeding off your energy…” 

“How’d you do that?” He is in awe of how Eddie looks holding his baby. His hair is up in a messy bun, and he’s in an old ratty t-shirt and a pair of Steve’s old pyjama bottoms that he took when he first moved in. He looks so cozy and at home and has the same effect on Steve’s daughter as on Steve himself. 

He’s pure safety. 

Eddie shrugs, still rocking her gently, he uses both hands to cradle her in his arms and he smiles down at her, “I guess not all crotch goblins are bad… she’s cute, and normally she doesn’t cry that much so I had to come up and check on you. I know I said I don’t want to babysit, but if you need 5 minutes, just bring her downstairs, I’ll watch her so you can take a breather.” 

“You don’t have to,” he keeps trying to carry the burden all on his own. 

“I know,” he gives Steve a little smile and then back down to the baby. “So, have you given any thought to a name for her or am I just supposed to call her Her?” 

“I don’t know, honestly,” he lets out another shaky breath. “It’s hard to pick, she doesn’t look like anything specific and nothing feels good enough… and what goes with Harrington anyway?” 

“You don’t have to give her the Harrington name,” Eddie reminds him. “You can put anything on the papers. She could be Samantha Humperdink, they don’t care as long as you sign it and register her.” 

“Humperdink,” Steve manages to laugh, “really?” 

“Yeah,” Eddie smiles back, eyes glistening with pure joy. 

He looks so good holding a baby. Especially Steve's baby.

Steve can’t stop looking at him. “So if I put Munson on there, you’d be fine with it?” It just slips out, but Eddie doesn’t think it’s weird. He doesn’t really react at all, he simply thinks about it. 

“Mmm, Buckley-Munson, with a hyphen,” he teases, not believing he’d actually do that. 

“I was thinking Stacy,” he’s honest, he hasn’t even told Robin, he keeps telling her he’s still thinking. “It means—

“Resurrection,” Eddie knows, staring down at her with a smile, he could see her as a Stacy. “It’s fitting for a Munson, not so much a Harrington.” 

“I know,” he’s thought about it a lot.

“Anastasia Harrington sounds good,” Eddie proposes, “sounds like a reporter on channel 4, I’m Anastasia Harrington reporting live from the scene,” he makes a girly voice and uses his pointer finger to make her bottom lip move as she talks. “I like it.” 

“Can you come upstairs with me?” Steve asks, selfishly, he knows she’s ready to go to sleep for real now and he doesn’t want to say goodnight to Eddie yet. “I just don’t want to take her out of your arms and risk her getting fussy again.” 

“Yeah,” Eddie doesn’t think twice about it, he simply follows Steve up the stairs and into his room. He sits on the bed and carefully lays the baby down on the mattress in the middle so she has no room to roll and fall off… she’s nowhere close to being old enough to do that on her own, but he’d rather be safe than sorry. 

He rests his big hand on her little tummy so she knows he’s still there, she’s all swaddled up and cozy, blinking in the low light of his room, fading off into sleep. Eddie stares at her with a smile, she’s adorable and every day she starts to look less like an alien and more like Steve. 

Steve gets into bed beside him with a pregnancy book and the birth certificate papers in hand. “Any middle name ideas?” 

“Huh?” Eddie turns to him, completely lost in thought. “Middle names?” 

“Yeah, I need to pick one,” he shows Eddie the paper and all the space there to fill in her full name, he’s already written Anastasia, so thats official. 

“Do you have any family names you could put there?” 

He shakes his head, “my moms an only child, I’m not using her name and my dads got all brothers… my grandmas are Elizabeth and Beatrice?” 

“Elizabeth is nice,” Eddie likes it simply because it starts with E, he feels like a part of him would be there in her name. 

“I think that’s Robin’s middle name too,” he says, but really he knows it is for sure. He knows everything about her, she was his other best friend after all.

“So then it’s double meaningful,” Eddie agrees, “I’m sure Nancy and Robin will be her godmothers, right?” 

“I never thought about that… but yeah,” Steve agrees, and it’s good that they’re together so they don’t take up both spots. “Do you want to be her other godparent? You know, with whoever you end up with one day?” 

“You’d trust me with her if you died?” 

Steve nods, it’s really a no-brainer. “I trusted you with my first kid and you almost died to protect him, so yeah. Yeah, I really trust you with her.” 

Eddie picks her back up and cradles her ever so gently, “I’d be honoured to be her godfather… it’s the closest I’ll get to being a dad.” 

“Don’t say that," Steve retorts, it breaks his heart a little to hear him say that. “It could still happen?” 

“I like men, dude, remember?” Eddie reminds him with a laugh, “it can’t happen, thats now how biology works.” 

“Adoption? Step-parenting?” He suggests, “one day it could be legal to marry other guys and you’ll get with someone who tried the whole family thing and you’ll be the cool stepdad every kid dreams of.” 

He can’t help but smile as he thinks about it, but the only thoughts he has currently is watching this little girl grow up with Steve by his side. His stupid crush on his roommate and best friend was starting to become too much for him to handle. 

“Maybe,” he agrees. “That sounds nice.” 

“I don’t get why people think being gay is bad, it’s not like we all don’t have gay thoughts sometimes…” 

“Most people don’t…” he says softly, wondering what Steve means by that but he won’t dare ask. 

“Robin said that too but like, I’m pretty confident I like girls but kissing boys is nice too,” he admits, both the sleep deprivation and Eddie’s calming presence make it come out easily. 

Eddie looks at him with huge, wide eyes blown out with pure shock and wonder, “you’ve kissed boys?�� 

He nods, “Tommy H… many times.” 

“Interesting,” Eddie takes that in very slowly. His eye almost begins to twitch as he accepts it. He’s not crazy. There’s been a spark there with Steve this whole time. “So would you two just like, get drunk and kiss or?” 

He nods, “and then pretended like we didn’t, but really it was just him who was drunk after a while. I just liked kissing him… I kinda miss it sometimes. When he was plastered he was really sweet with me and when he was sober he was a dick.” 

“I’m sorry, Stevie,” he feels for him. He really does. “But you know, it doesn’t have to always be like that? If you find someone, anyone, guy or girl, who makes you feel safe and happy, that’s who you should be with.” 

Steve's eyes start to well with tears and he pinches the bridge of his nose to try and compose himself. He knows he’s too tired and when he’s this tired he’ll say anything. “Thank you.” 

“Do you want me to go?” He asks, feeling like he overstayed his welcome. 

He shakes his head, “no…” his voice breaks and he cries again. “I’m so tired of doing this alone and it’s been a week... A week, Ed's. What if I can't do this?” 

“You can and I'm always here for you,” he agrees. “Stacy is asleep, you want me to put her in her crib? Then we can just hang out like old times?” 

“If you want…” he looks down at his watch through the tears to see the time. “She has to eat again in 58 minutes.” 

“She just ate?” 

“She has a tiny stomach,” Steve explains. “She has 2 ounces of food every 3 hours which is 10 feedings a day and when she’s like 4 months old it goes to 5 feedings a day and at 6 months I can give her baby food.” 

“That’ll be fun, I remember the blueberry puree is so fucking delicious,” he groans, leaning back against the pillows with Stacy still in his arms. 

Steve moves in closer and rests his chin on eddies shoulder and stares down at his baby. “It’ll be a lot of fun when she starts being a person… you know, smiling, laughing, talking…” 

“Think she’ll call you dad or mom first?” He teases, enjoying how cuddling Steve suddenly got. 

He simply shrugs, "Doesn't matter to me," he replies, eyes fluttering, he’s tired and comfortable and safe. His stress levels are down, Eddie’s breathing is calming and so Steve falls asleep there on his shoulder. 

Eddie basks in the glory of being with Steve in sweet moments like these. They’ve fallen asleep together in this bed before, crossfaded from a night of self-medicating and sharing their struggles with nightmares. He’s felt the warmth of Steve's arms around him many times, but holding Steve’s daughter, who has a name they picked together, who Steve trusts him with, with Steve sound asleep on his shoulder?

It’s more affection and love than Eddie ever expected to feel from his best friend. 

—

Eddie gets a lot more comfortable with Stacy after a few more days. He watches her for a whole 2 hours completely alone, he makes her a bottle and changes her diaper and rocks her to sleep all while Steve registers his tiny human as a real person and picks up some groceries. He comes basically running down the basement stairs once he’s home, missing his little girl dearly, finding her passed out on Eddie’s chest while he reads one of Steve’s many parenting books. 

It stops him dead in his tracks when he sees it. 

His heart beats like mad in his chest as he realizes why it’s such a sight to be seen. 

He’s madly in love with Eddie and how he takes care of him, how he makes him feel safe and secure and more loved than anyone he was ever supposed to call his family before. Eddie is such a wonderful person, Steve knew that, but now his daughter gets to know that too. She gets to experience twice the amount of love kids are supposed to feel from their dads. Because she has 2. 

“Did it go okay?” Eddie asks, lowering the book from his face to see Steve. He’s running his other hand over Stacy’s back, soothing her as she sleeps, the same way Steve does every night. 

He nods and makes his way closer, he sits on the edge of the bed and smiles, “she’s officially a Harrington…”

“Lucky duck,” he smirks, leaning in and gently kissing the top of her little head. “All the girls here would kill to be a Harrington.” 

“Too bad I don’t want any of them,” he mumbles, rolling his eyes. 

Even before having a baby, he wasn’t going on dates, he was bored with the options and the personalities and he never knew why at first. Now he knows it’s because he was coming home to the biggest personality, the kindest soul, the best option for him in all of Hawkins. 

“Don’t blame you there,” Eddie laughs along. “Who needs a wife when you’ve already got the best outcome of marriage right here. A perfect little girl who’s just like you.” 

“She’s not even a month old, Ed’s, how much like me can she be?” 

“Well for one, she can fall asleep anywhere,” he teases, not knowing Steve never had that problem until he met Eddie. He only let his guard down enough to fall asleep because he was around now, everyone was safe with Eddie in their friend group, and it allowed him to close his eyes without fear. 

“And two, she can chug like a champ,” Eddie throws in. “I can’t be the only one who remembers keg stand king Steve.” 

He groans, “the hangover wasn’t worth the title.” 

“I bet,” he tries not to laugh in case the movement of his chest wakes her up. “And she’s cute. Cute as heck. It’s definitely your fault.” 

Steve swoons, feeling his face heat up and no doubt blushing, “yeah okay… if anything she’s like me because she feels this safe with you.” 

“You do?” He asks, eyes as bright as if a universe was forming behind them. 

“Yeah,” he kicks off his shoes and climbs into the bed beside him, cuddling into his side with his head on Eddie’s shoulder and laying his hand over Eddie’s, on Stacy’s back. “The safest. I think she knows that too.” 

Eddie lets out a deep breath, “thats all I could hope for.” 

Steve kisses his shoulder gently and rests his chin right back where it was, “Can I say something… something that could change us forever?” 

“I don’t think anything could change us for the worse,” he admits, feeling like he knows where this is going. 

“I wouldn’t want to have a family with anyone else,” he admits. There’s no going back now. “I was really scared to marry a woman one day and have a kid and do all that normal stuff only to have my life fall to shit like my parents… and now I don’t have to do that. I have my baby. I have you. I’m good.”

“Do you know the panic that ripped through me when I saw her?” He whispers, feeling a bit ashamed for it. “I thought for sure you’d get with her mom and do the right thing and kick me out of the basement 'cause I’m a bad influence on a little life.” 

“I could never,” Steve lifts his head from eddies shoulder and looks him in the eyes. “Even when Brenda showed up with her, I offered to co-parent but I didn’t want to date her or marry her or do the right thing regarding her mom… I have always liked the idea of being a dad, not so much the having a wife part.” 

“Why’s that, Steve?” He wants to hear him say it. 

“Cause I don’t want to end up like my dad,” he’s honest, too honest. “And I rather have a husband.” 

Eddie swoons but he also feels like he can’t breathe as it all comes to light, thanks to the ball of sunshine resting on his chest. 

“Is it too late to put Munson on that birth certificate?” He teases, cutting into the emotions in the room with a knife. 

Steve laughs too, holding him a bit tighter, “she has 2 middle names… it’s a long ass name, but everything important is in there.” 

“What is it?”

“Anastasia Elizabeth Munson Harrington…” 

“So she can go by Stacy Munson if she wants to one day,” he can’t believe it, his name attached to something so pure and perfect and part Steve. His eyes well with tears, “I love it, Stevie.” 

“Good,” he leans in to kiss Eddie on the cheek, only for him to turn and capture Steve’s lips with his own. 

Steve rests his hand on Eddie’s cheek, holding him there as he kisses him gently for the first time. Like a cartoon, he feels as though hearts are flowing out of his head and filling the room. He’s wanted to kiss Eddie for almost a year now, ever since he held that stupid broken bottle to his neck and stared at him with those broken doe eyes. 

Their noses still touch when he pulls back, more millimetres from each other, smiling as they stared into each other's eyes. “You think her eyes will turn brown?” Eddie whispers, admiring the chocolate swirls for the first time after years of thinking his own eyes were boring. 

He nods, “if you read the book a bit more it says the blue often leaves a few weeks after birth.” 

“Good, then she'll really look like us,” he smiles before stealing another quick kiss. “Thank you…”

“For?” He asks. It sounds a lot bigger than just him being grateful his name on the birth certificate. 

“Not letting me die back there, believing me the whole time, insuring I wasn’t homeless,” the list could go on. He was forever grateful for Steve. “I’m really glad I’m here for this.” 

“I’m glad you’re here too,” Steve kisses him again and again before he pulls back and looks down at their sweet girl, “I’m glad she has you. I can’t imagine a world where she’s here and you’re not. I never want to either.” 

General Taglist 

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Steddie

@nosaladallowed-ao3 @maya-custodios-dionach @wifeyreid @girl-with-an-orange-cat @sunshinemunchkin 

[steddiebang]

You Will Still Haunt Me | Explicit | 62,700

Author: @hairmetal666Artist: @parasite_z Artist: @Obligated_art

Six years after Eddie Munson summons a demon during a high school final club ritual and is pulled into hell, Steve Harrington returns as a teacher in a misguided attempt at exposure therapy. He doesn’t expect a group of nerdy and curious teens to start delving into the urban legends about Eddie’s mysterious disappearance, dredging up all of Steve’s worst memories in the process. The more they ask about Eddie, the more Steve’s nights are plagued by unsettling and arousing dreams.

After a tense confrontation with the kids, Steve’s nightmare features a monstrous version of Eddie, hellbent on revenge, who might not actually be a figment of Steve’s subconscious, and definitely isn’t dead. Determined to rescue Eddie, Steve is ready to die to make up for his past failures. But Steve and Eddie are playing with forces they don’t quite understand, and it turns out the cost might not be to Steve at all, but to one of the kids.

Fic | Art | Art

Pairings: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington & the Party, Minor or Background RelationshipsCharacters: Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley, Nancy Wheeler, Jonathan Byers, Argyle, Chrissy Cunningham, Tommy Hagan, Jason Carver, The Party, Jim Hopper, Joyce Byers, Martin Brenner Tags: Alternate Universe-Modern Setting, Alternate Universe-Dark Academia, The Upside Down, Eddie Munson in the Upside Down, Monster Eddie Munson, Vampire Eddie Munson, Eddie Munson Has Powers, Teacher Steve Harrington, Enemies to Lovers, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Steve Harrington has PTSD, Steve Harrington Has Bad Parents, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Temporary Character Death, Slow Burn, POV Multiple, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Gay Eddie Munson, Top Eddie Munson, Bottom Steve Harrington, Dream Sex, Dom/sub Undertones, Blood Drinking, Blood Kink, Masturbation, Mildly Dubious Consent, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Dream Sharing