#Eventually I will take the plunge. Maybe next year! It'll be a bitch to rebuild but you know. Can't stay stagnant forever)
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The duality of life is so crazy. I was back on campus today, I’ve been feeling pretty ancient all week because it’s been frosh week which means I have to deal with the fact that this year’s class graduates in 2028 (that’s not a real year) and were born in 2006 and 07, years that I can remember writing in the margins of a school notebook.
I'm walking around campus for the beginning-of-year campus clubs fair, and it's all, people love me, people think I'm cool, people are coming up to me saying they like my fit, in the meanwhile I'm internally getting jumpscared thinking wait; these incredibly well-dressed kids are approaching me whilst I'm shovelling fucking peanuts into my mouth out of a bag in my tote bag
There comes a point when you officially get Older and become invisible to cool young tiny things, and then you can do whatever you want because they sort of stop noticing you. I've been feeling a bit old this week, I'm at Big Person work, everyone around me is like half a decade younger, we're at quite different stages in our lives, I've been thinking. But I also have the sort of face that would pass me for a 19 y/o clearly, because these kids all have pulled me in like I'm some sort of counter culture bohemian trendsetting cool kid, and whatever the hell that means, it's definitely instantly made me feel a lot younger and connected with 'the youth'
#it's funny saying that because I am literally the exact age that you'd call youth#but if you're in a student-y area you're bound to feel old the minute you hit 22 because you're now older than 3/4 of undergraduates#fellas. I am not 22. I feel fucking historic sometimes. The kids look at me in awe because I saw Greta van Fleet live in 2019.#That was not even their first tour but these kids were 14 when that happened. I was old enough to go alone#(This is also why I have been feeling like I've got to move eventually. Student towns are great at perpetually being 21#You go to a real city and the young people are 30#Also my planned city is where all my favourite bands tour so it's a win-win#it's just I've been So Scared because I don't know anyone in said city and I work remotely out of elsewhere#Eventually I will take the plunge. Maybe next year! It'll be a bitch to rebuild but you know. Can't stay stagnant forever)#chitter chatter#I'm still a little thrown off when cool-looking people think I'm cool. My mum thinks I dress like a slob lol
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