#DON'T FORGET ABOUT THE AROMANTIC AND/OR AGENDER FOLKS

[miss-midnightt]

This year, I went to two local pride events. It was great, but in both events I noticed something: there was almost no aromantic representation. There were plenty of flags for sale, as well as colored merch and stickers, encompassing a wide range of identities. Not ONE of them was aromantic. The flag banners they'd put up, with a bunch of different LGBTQ+ flags? No aromantic. However, there was an asexual flag as well as other items for sale, which was part of the reason I was surprised by the lack of aromantic flags and other merchandise.

I'm not saying the asexual representation is bad; it's great! It's the lack of representation for aromanticism that is problematic. I'm aroace. I was pissed as HELL because I felt that half of me was underrepresented. I can't imagine how excluded allosexual arospec folk would have felt to know that they had all but been completely erased. The A in LGBTQIA doesn't just stand for asexual; it's for aromantic and agender (which I also noted had no representation) too.

The only mention of aromanticism at all in both pride events was a brief, easy to overlook touch on it at a few stalls. Pride is meant to be inclusive to all. To ALL. Not ALLOROMANTICS ONLY. ALL.

I'm aromantic. I'm not just ace. It took me years to figure out that I was also aromantic, but it doesn't actually make a difference. If I can only find my asexuality shown at pride events then things need to change.

I am aromantic. I'd like for that part of me to be represented. I DEMAND that part of me to be represented.

[zushiisamess]

i dont know how to explain how OUT THERE I want to be this pride month.

So let's visiblize all those who don't get the rep, and wanna be loud and proud!

Calling all the: ASEXUALS, NON-BINARY PEEPS, AROMATICS, AGENDER PEEPS, TRANS PPL, PANSEXUALS AND PANFOMANTICS, POLYAMOROUS FOLKS, DEMIROMANTICS AND DEMISEXUALS, THOSE QUESTIONING, AND THOSE WHO DONT WANNA STICK ON A LABEL. We see you. You are valid, and deserve just as much show as the more well known sexualities.

if u want this is the full message bb. The rest are specific affirmations. v

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ASEXUALS:

you don't owe anyone SHIT. You are perfect just the way the universe made you. Don't listen to anyone telling you you are a child, or are confused. You are so bright and loveable. whether you're out or not, proud or ashamed, I want you to know that you do not need fixing. And the hardest bit is acceptance. But the best bit is simply being you <3

NON-BINARY PEEPS:

"You were not made to conform" Marina is 100% RIGHT. you are the badasses of our world. And the very binary that our society had made to exist eludes you. I know it's hard. Running from who you are, and people attacking you just for being you. And I say, FORGET THAT. You are a person, one that deserves to be treated with love, and RESPECT. go out there and be your badass self. Conformity was shite anyways <3

AROMANTICS:

You are not broken. Love is yours. And you are a being that exudes brightness. You deserve a space where you are not pressured to make your love romantic. IT IS YOURS. So give it to yourself, your friends, family. I am sorry our society has been built on pillars that make everyone question you. And maybe even make you feel like you have to hate love or else everyone will assume you like it. But I say fuck that! You get to pick. YOU. SO GO LOOK IN THAT MIRROR, AND SAY "I love myself just as I am, and I am the wielder of my own sword." even our own community excludes you a lot. I am sorry. You have your space here because you made it, AND YOU DESERVE IT <3

AGENDER PEEPS:

It is okay to not be one of the predicted genders in this world. And I KNOW you know that. Take this as my aggressive positivity that you deserve more recognition. WE NEED YOUR INPUT, thank you for being made just the way you were meant to be made, and if people can't see that you are a wonderful individual who doesn't need their validation to feel good about themselves in their own body it's THEIR loss. Your parts don't define you, and you are allowed to take up space.

TRANS FOLKS:

HERE'S YOUR GENDER ARFIRMATION! you were made exactly as the universe intended you to be. They gave you an existence different from lots of other people don't face because they wanted you to live in a different way than cis people do. But that does not mean even for a second you were a mistake. I know right now a lot of hate is being thrown at you. people saying you are too young to know, or too old. You do NOT deserve it. You are the loveliest human being I have ever had the pleasure to know. Please know you are loved, and that your Identity does not need to be tucked away. Know that we need you here. YOU HAVE A PLACE IN OUR COMMUNITY, And we will stand with you as you face backlash. We will hold your hand and remind you, "You are powerful, and extremely loved by us and yourself." GO FLIP OFF THEM UNCULTUTED ASSHOLES AND LOVE YOURSELF <3

PANSEXUALS & PANROMANTICS:

You can love more than one gender. You are the very embodiment of love! You wave your hands in the sky and bask in the beautiful light that you created. YOU ARE NOT A CHEATER, OR A PLAYER. AND YOU ARE NOT BISEXUAL. The panphobia in this community is strong, and I am sorry you ever have to face it. You are perfect and loveable just the way you are. You see people's very souls. And you are a magical being that deserves to go in that sun and Scream "I KNOW WHO I AM AND IM AMAZING"

POLYAMOROUS FOLKS:

Why are you controversial. Fuck them, it is absolutely okay to be poly. Monogamous relationships have been expected for years. But that expectation is based on a feeling you don't have. I am sorry you have to hide, for fear of scaring other people away. know that you deserve the love you have. AND YOU DESERVE THE LOVE YOU WANT. Please don't listen to them. Actually. Just go tell them to fuck off <3

DEMIROMANTIC AND DEMISEXUAL PPL:

Hi, you are not picky, or a bitch. your way of loving is perfectly made. And you need to accept it on the level it is given. You are so beautiful and deserve your love. I know it's hard, to have people call you "straight passing" and "not real" YOU DONT NEED THEM. AND YOU DONT NEED THEIR CRAP! Just flick your hand around and give em' the middle finger. If you don't have a partner that's perfectly okay. And specifically for the demisexual people–You do not owe ANYONE sex. I know that you are a bad bitch so go realize it mkay? <3

UNLABELED:

Hi. You don't need a label on your shit so that people respect you. In this world we are pressured to be, "the pretty one" the "bisexual one" but life is a spectrum, and you will be accepted into our community regardless of whether or not you label yourself. I know lots of people say you are "QUEER BAITING" which makes me laugh at their sheer fucking stupidity. people cannot "bait" you. And i want you to know that you are welcome as an lgbtqia+ person whether you label or not. Be the spectrum you are so you can be true to yourself babe <3

QUESTIONING:

Hey. I know it can be hard to come to terms with your own identity sometimes. And I'm here to tell you to be open minded with yourself. You deserve a space a space in our community if you wish to take it. And you deserve to be able to question in peace. If you decide you are one of us that's okay, and if you decide you're not, we will STILL welcome you as an ally. I love you okay, so be patient with yourself and know no matter what, YOU ARE LOVED <3

if you want to personally add something, or an encouraging message please do!

And please rb so that this reaches people who might need to hear it this pride month.

[ieatwormsandtheytasteverygood]

Fuck yuo *introduces self(s) again* (and then updates it again. the silly ppl in my head decided to shift around a lil)

Apparently we go by Áesgirr here. so I'll be doing that too. We use he/him, hey/hem/here/heren/hem self, and 'e/'em/'er/'ers/'emself. We're a transgender genderqueer man, bisexual, and aromantic. Bodily 18, Irish & South African. We're physically disabled, have autism, ADHD, psychosis and a few special extras to make life interesting (read: painful). We plan on converting to Judaism when/if possible, but can't for at least a while yet.

We're pretty inactive just because we forget that tumblr exists. Repeatedly.

Our autism decided to make a special left swing right back to Jirt & the Silmarillion, but we've still quite some fondness for mediæval history, and naturally for philology & other linguistics.

Fluent in (Modern) English, Middle English, and Afrikaans (albeit getting out of practise). Vaguely conversational at German, Swedish and Zulu. Quite terrible at Irish, Welsh, Setswana and Middle Scots. And we can understand quite a bit of Modern Scots, (written) French, Dutch, Old English, Ecclesiastical Latin, and various related languages.

We're eternally trapped in the hellscape that is the Silmarillion fandom, but also Doctor Who & its associates, Star Trek, Our Flag Means Death, Shakespeare (we love the political plays), Good Omens, and probably some others. It's a thing.

We have so many pets and we love them to bits. <333

We also like art and writing, but unfortunately our art blog is completely separate to this (irl people know about our art blog), so no art here alas. We might post some of our calligraphy however! We love love love music, and we sing tenor, and play the violin and cello. Please send obscure folk music to us!!

The main lads (gender neutral) that're currently active are:

Ruthuifin/Rúthuifim - he/him, e/em. Aro neu, cassgender. Ñoldo (elf). Far too old and far too good at making terrible jokes. You don't want to know what e has to say about Eldarin marital law. It's terrifying. And he's probably actually tax-fraud-romantic for all he goes on about it /j

Orchalon - no pronouns (auxiliary he/him). Anattractional, cassgender/agender (masculine or neutral terms preferred). Cursed to be Ruthuifin's brother, and Malto's cousin. Vaguely elvish, vaguely draconic.

Malto/Cólðir/Cóleblein/Maltalain - he/him. Probably aspec? Also an elf. He's the reason why we spent R4000 on all 12 volumes of HoME. Don't ask about the vat of wine incident.

Roquén(/Rochir/Rochen/Rocen) - hen/han/tîn/tîn/anhen (auxiliary it/its). non-binary. quoisexual, aromantic (cupioromantic), toric/NBLM, oriented aroace. yet another elf. burdened by tîn relation to ruthuifin and malto (much more tolerant of orchalon, for Obvious Reasons). music enjoyer, persecutor, and the Only Sane One Left.

Minyafaramo - he/him. male, aroace. elf (are we even surprised at this point). related to the other elves (what a shocker). is plotting alongside malto, tatyo and nelyo (not that nelyo) to find a way for us to do horseback archery. he still hasnt forgiven nelyo for straining a muscle doing HEMA a few weeks ago. loves animals and music as well as hitting people and objects with swords and/or bows.

Tatyafaramo - he/him. male, anattractional. you can guess the species. yes, he chose to go by this name. loves archery, but also animals, music, and literature. i suspect he enjoys hitting people with swords, too.

Nelyafaramo - he/him. male, aroace. he likes HEMA (archery & mediæval swordplay. dont ask him to do fencing. he will hit you over the head with the hilt of his foil.), and wroth. he's the one who gets to have anger over our daddy issues instead of Melancholic Thoughts.

Caliwe - they/them. we tried to name them Caliweg, but apparently "i am not shiny-ful". orangegender, yellowgender, bluegender, purplegender, gemder. aromantic (etc.), but ma-æsthetic. aids and abets malto and ruthuifin. for all they're an elf, they act remarkably like a golden retriever /aff. big sociology & anthropology nerd.

Loup - it/its. unhuman. no opinion on gender or sexuality. friends(?) with nelyafaramo et al.

cat - it/its. name must be pronounced as /ˈʔːːːːːːː/ (NB: really focus on the not breathing!!). my gender is whatever pisses u off the most, and my sexuality is painful to look at. unfortunate "babysitter" of malto. i have also aided and abetted malto. i do not apologise.

Pádraig - he/him. The One True Pope. Pan-oriented aroace, cassgender (or something like that). Formerly human, now a horror beyond your comprehension. His hobbies are insomnia and hating the British.

Obligatory DNI list: pædos, animal abusers, people who post using entirely inaccessible fonts (think faux cyrillic kind of thing). If you're going to be a dick about our identity please just move on. We can & will block liberally, especially when it comes to sexybots. If you're not in fact a sexybot and we end up blocking you, send us an anonymous ask with your username & we shall unblock.

Have a great Tuesday, and may you never experience the horrors of Malto spouting cursed Silmarillion facts.