#DO ME A FAVOUR IS THE SONG OF ALL TIME ITS THE SONG EVER ITS LIKE A BLORBO TO ME ITS SO SPECIAL TO ME

[harryslittlefreakk]

masterlist

* indicates smut

^ indicates angst

you can join my taglist here

my requests are open :) please feel free to tell me anything you’d like to see, no idea is too wild here. 🫶🏼

late night talking (completed)

a chance meeting with harry before his wembley dates leads you into a whirlwind relationship. harry x fan!y/n

favourite crime

a chance meeting between y/n and her professor leads to a dare… which leads to a forbidden affair neither of them will forget

my policeman

harry is the police officer assigned to your case, though you are inexplicably drawn to one another 🤭 age gap romance

dr. styles*

fratboy!harry is a surgical resident in your class, and he helps you to relieve some stress

the pact* part 2*

you and harry made a childhood pact to marry if you were both still single when he reached 30. now that his big birthday is approaching, you find out whether your friendship (and your pact) have stood the test of time

little angel*

a little drabble of needy y/n and dad!rry goodness, the pact extra but can be read alone

to build a home *^

buzz cut!rry and y/n spend their first new year’s together after splitting up and they look back on happier times. inspired by the song

girl crush *^

harry x bisexual bandmate y/n, based on the song

harry turns 30 *

a filthy smutty blurb about harry’s birthday 🎈💖

after the storm *^

y/n wakes up in her sworn enemies bed, with a city-wide storm keeping her trapped there. in the time that she’s stuck with harry, can they overcome their differences and build a friendship? 🫢🤷

obsessed ^

harry is your roommate, best friend … and crush 💃 he’s finally broken up with his girlfriend and you’re struggling to hide how you feel about him. loosely based on the song!!

arrogant s.o.b ^

based on this request - grumpy/mean Harry and readers first fight and he says something really harsh/yells and makes her cry? And then feels really bad after like grumpyxsunshine vibes?

too sweet *

essentially porn with little plot… or .. when her boss decides that letting her go is in her best interests, y/n decides to show him exactly what he’s missing out on

just between us *^

when y/n’s life starts to fall apart, her boss is there to pick up the pieces.. behind his wife’s back. nanny reader x ceorry

make me, darling^ make me, darling 2*

harry and y/n’s shared hatred for each other finally reaches its breaking point when they realise how deep their feelings go. based on the prompt ‘do all of us a favour and just leave’

kiss it better

when y/n doesn’t show up to work, harry takes her care into his own hands. ceorry x PA y/n

the one *^

y/n runs into the last person she ever expected to see in the last place she ever expected to see him, bringing old feelings & hurt to the surface. based on the prompt: childhood friends to lovers

fictober masterlist

[mamaskillerqueen]

Have A Beer For Me || Jake 'Hangman' Seresin

A/N: This is sad, and short, and contains mention of Jake being with a woman. There is also a main character death. If you'd ever like more to this story, I'd be happy to add more to this world. Also! Got inspo from this song.

“Well, I have the most beautiful girl in the world waiting in my bed for me… and I don’t have it in me to make her wait much longer,”

All of the men around the table made a collection of noises. All are in the booing category. It made Hangman chuckle lowly with a shake of his head.

“I have one more cheers in me, and then I really gotta get going."

Everyone at the table quickly lifted their glasses, clinking them together as Jake started the speech he had dragged them all out to hear. Everyone knew it was coming but not a single soul was ready for it.

“Boys, I do gotta ask a favour… you know, if I don’t make it back from this one.”

“Hey man, that’s not going to happen. We all know you, you’re gonna pull through without a scratch,” Bob interrupted but with a singular glare from Hangman he snapped his mouth shut. Any protests that would have ensued were quickly shut down.

“As I was saying, if I don’t make it back, I need a few things from y'all. For starters, I don’t want any tears. My girl will have that covered. I want y'all to have a beer for me, and to keep my truck going. Big off-road treks that get the old girl dirty,” Jake laughed, trying hard to not think about how mad his girlfriend will be at his friends when they come to steal his truck.

This was the part he was dreading the most. This was where he was going to beg them to keep an eye on her. He was devastated to be going on this solo mission. It was surely a suicide mission, and prior to having met her, he was all for those. She had changed everything and he hadn’t had enough time with her. The little diamond ring that recently found its home on her finger was a testament to that.

“I need y’all to keep an eye on her, and when the time is right, you gotta find her someone who will love her like I would have. You know she deserves the world and more.”

No one acknowledges the break in his voice or the hint of tears welling up in his eyes. If all of the guys around the table were honest, they knew that this was what tonight was about. How could they not? Seeing the usually unshakable Hangman in near tears was messing them up more than they’d like to admit.

“And to end this sap fest… I’m proud I’ve gotten to be a part of this squadron. It’s been good to know y’all. Thanks for givin’ me a chance. I know I haven’t always been the best, but don’t you forget to cheer for them Longhorns on the away teams side any chance you get.”

As Hangman pulled his glass to his lips and finished off his beer the rest of his friends slowly followed suit. Rooster was the first to finish off his drink after, watching Jake carefully as he shrugged his jacket back on. They made eye contact, and Rooster couldn’t deny the sinking feeling this was the last time he’d see his newishly found friend. A nod was shared as Jake placed a hand on Coyote’s shoulder.

Javy quickly rose to his feet and followed Jake out the front doors. This was the hardest for him of everyone. He was doing his best to not let it show. Jake never talked like this. Then again, he was never ordered to a suicide mission by himself before either.

“We were gonna get married. Gave her Meemaw’s ring and everything. You’re my best man. Just needed you to know.”

Javy let out a heavy exhale, because of course he was. There would have never been a question of that. He appreciated the sentiment though, and as much as he knew he had to let his friend leave to see his girl, he really didn’t want to.

“I know, man. Always did,” Javy finally answered. His voice was a little more shaken than he would have liked it to be but neither of them acknowledged that either.

Javy held his hand out, waiting for his friend to shake it. When Jake slipped his hand into his friends they pulled each other into a hug afterwards.

“Take care of her while I’m gone,” Jake whispered.

“You got it, big man,” Javy returned in the same whisper.

Javy watched his best friend walk away, and climb into his precious truck. They used to joke that she was the only thing Jake would ever love. Boy were they wrong as ever. Javy watched as the truck disappeared into the dark, knowing it would be the last time he ever saw his best friend.

Jake’s plane ended up going down behind enemy lines. There was no rescue team. All that returned was a folded flag. Javy handed it off to his best friend's other half at his funeral. They both cried as the guns went off. In fact, there wasn’t a dry eye in the whole squadron.

The whole squad, including Phoenix and Halo, had gone to almost every Longhorns home game just so they could sit on the visitor's side and cheer as loud as they could for the home team. And every Friday night, the first and last song played on the old jukebox at the Hard Deck is always Slow Ride.

Javy and the girl who had turned his best friend into the man they had all become so proud to know took that old truck out for a nice long joy ride at least once a month. He had even introduced her to a good ole boy Jake would have hated but was exactly the kind of guy he would have wanted for her. She hasn’t been ready though, and Javy wasn’t sure she ever would be. That dainty little diamond still sits nestled right where Jake left it.

Whenever the sun starts to set, and the sky is a brilliant shade of reddish purple, Javy finds himself with a beer that isn’t his brand down by the shoreline. He whispers the latest updates of life to his best friend, holds the beer up for a cheers, and tells Jake just how much he’s loved and missed with tears in his eyes.

[regulusrules]

Ranking the best 10 Merlin episodes + a fic rec based on each one:

(absolutely not based on how gay they were) ((no order for the eps; they're all chef's kiss)) (((last two fics have a hold on me that levels the show itself; worth scrolling for)))

1. The Poisoned Chalice

Look. There is something just absolutely entrancing about introducing this episode in the first five of the entire show. Like, this hands-on was the sole reason everyone fell for those two idiots. It beautifully captured how the saving each other thing is reciprocal, because the first three episodes you just have to watch Merlin run around saving Arthur, never the reverse. Producing it early on in the show was the decision that, in my opinion, held everyone in their chokehold for eternity.

Fic rec: you are my favorite mistake (it can only be fate) by @multifandom-jess.

2. The Death Song of Uther Pendragon

I could go on and on for how this episode singlehandedly carried s5 on its shoulder. Like, okay I unfortunately love s5 with all my fucking heart, but this episode was perfect. Ghosts? Check. Banter? Check. POETRY?? Check check. A slap to Uther's face? Oh how beautifully checked.

It's so easy to recall how Arthur truly loved his father, but in this episode, the turmoil you see in his eyes from the actions of his father and how he resorts to saving the ones he loves (Merlin) over his father, is just too beautiful to be overlooked. Ever since Arthur became king, we see him struggle from his father's legacy. But in this episode, he begins to detach both consciously and subconsciously from him. Whether it's in his decision to save the old sorceress in the beginning, or to shun Uther's ghost, both the literal and the figurative, from his life any longer. This was one of the episodes that captured the true essence of King Arthur.

+1: the innuendos of this episode were 🤌. They knew what they were doing, you can't convince me otherwise. (are you threatening me with a spoon? / I'm teaching him some poetry.. he can't get enough of it! / what was that? h-horseplay. why don't I show you?)

Fic rec: My heart is readily yours by @regulusrules. (absolutely love how after all this introspection, i decided to throw it all away and made uther stab merlin in the fucking heart instead. but still it was my honourable attempt to shit on the finale and give them the happy ending everyone deserved).

3. The Sword in the Stone pt. 2

OKAY. This episode! Aside from how badass Merlin was in both pt.1&2, but here, especially in the part where us audience were impatiently waiting for the revival of the sword in the stone, there could've been nothing more perfect. Just like their adaptation of the round table scene, this was perfect in its own way for how different it was. They didn't make it so that people will finally find a king; they made it so that the people believe in their king. And more than that, for Arthur to believe in himself. With the estrangement and losing his crown, the writers gave him the best way to re-establish his inner glory. And Merlin being this guide; what more perfect culmination to their relationship?

You have to believe, Arthur.

Iconic.

Fic rec: Couldn't choose between Only Friend by @captain-ozone, and Fathom Me Out by @supercalvin. Brilliance ahead in both of them, I tell you.

4. The Eye of the Phoenix

Magic. Gwaine. Quests. Need I say more to explain that this was the show's holy trinity?

Fic rec: From Past to Present by flowersheep. (Prince Merlin. Archer Merlin. Perfection my friends).

5. A Servant of Two Masters

Look look; if there's an honourary wall of opinions for all the people who've watched Merlin, I DARE you to find just one who disliked this episode. Like, the series was so full of BS sometimes, but this episode was above all. The level of brilliance in this episode; showing Dark!Merlin, who's at the same time hilariously funny, and seeing him BAMF his way with Morgana, even when he's chained and tortured.. oh dear holy Lord. His "do me a favour, could you? let Arthur know." was able to steal all breath from my lungs the first time I saw it (and until now).

And don't get me started on the Protective!Arthur we got. Caring for Merlin, screaming for him when the rocks fell between them, silencing Agravaine immediately when he told him he's sorry for losing such a loyal servant because bullshit if he doesn't reign down hell before he loses Merlin. And ofc, Courage and Strength on their way to find Magic, which just filled my heart with an 'aaahhh!' moment, because we didn't get enough Gwaine-Arthur-Merlin shenanigans. And at last, the Hug™. Fucking screamed let me tell you.

It is an episode that truly showed everything; from comic elements to fluff and angst and everything. The only thing it lacked was, as always, giving Arthur the space to know. Because ffs what would they have lost if they made Arthur understand that Merlin's under Morgana's control? It wouldn't have exposed shit. It would've just been a plus to us to see Arthur caring for Merlin even more. They tried so hard that it completely backfired sometimes.

Fic rec: Still I Surface in Morning Light by @queerofthedagger. (I swear to you, anything written by this author, I readily throw whatever in hand to read it).

6. The Dragon's Call

Let thy gif caption speak.

No but really, that first episode was the stuff of legends. I could list down tens of tropes they did in just that episode alone. Honestly, no "family" show I've ever seen had started this powerfully. Just the music alone, the beauty of beginnings, not the CGI, was truly so gripping. Also bonus points for just Colin Morgan's sass abilities. None can compare.

Fic rec: This Time Around... series (incomplete) by Oneiric (lkdaswani). (this is a time travel AU, but the way the writer rewrote this episode was one of the best deviations I've read for an episode I already find near faultless).

7. The Sins of the Father

I might be subjecting myself to true wrath with my upcoming statement, but here we go:

S2 sucked.

From the beginning of the season, Arthur's shift in characterization from the honourable lovable prat of s1 to a letting Merlin act as a horse stool got me going wtf? It was like they deliberately ruined everything in their relationship and started out fresh just to force the Arthurian narrative of Arwen. And it's fine by me, truly, even if I'll never ship them, but they could've developed Arthur's character SO MUCH in that season beyond comic relief and romantic rendezvous.

Anyway so that I don't stray so much from the topic; this episode was, by fair comparison, the best in the entire season. By now it's pretty obvious that I gravitate towards all the episodes that give Arthur a semblance of agency. Him going against Uther and his maniac murderous agenda was the start of actually seeing King Arthur in front of us. Also, him listening to Merlin when he was on the verge of committing patricide was one of the things that gave me hope in how there's still hope in them. Even if they ruined it with making Merlin lie to Arthur, but the writers practically ruined every good episode with this.

+1: Morgause's intro was badass.

Fic rec: The Sins of the Father (and how to right them) by @cupcakezys. (what we deserved. to see arthur with agency, with an ability to decide for his future without being lied and deceived to).

8. Diamond of the Fucking Day

No matter how much I hate this episode, I can't, in good conscience, deny its hold on my heart. As I wrote before, there could've been no better magic reveal than this. And for all of my bitterness over their decision to kill Arthur, I sanely admit how it was a decision that insured the immortality of this fandom. It's been ten years since that episode aired, and I bet my ass off that it will still feel the same even after countless more decades.

Fic rec: literally the entirety of the fandom's fix-it fics. We all started from there, didn't we? Choosing only one would be so undervaluing to all the brilliance I've seen. However, my tags filter for it usually include: fix-it, angst with a happy ending, court sorcerer merlin, shitting on bbc writers 101, canon era, not canon compliant, everybody lives especially king arthur you mfs.

Update: I subconsciously took all these tags and wrote them in a fic

9. The Wicked Day

Throw me from the highest tower there is because every time I remember this scene, I just want to fade into the light. The sheer level of love and understanding shimmering between those two. Sometimes I marvel at the choice of bringing Colin and Bradley together, because no two could have achieved such chemistry, platonic or not, as those two did. This whole episode of showing Arthur's grief, and Merlin's desperation to heal it, was truly unforgettable. I try not to linger on its ending, Arthur denouncing magic for the millionth of time, but other than that it was a gem served to us on a silver platter.

Also seeing Uther finally die was a plus.

Fic rec: As much as I'd love to recommend my own fic for this, but honestly, whenever I get the chance, I will always take it to scream and wail about one of my absolute favourite fics of all time, which really isn't given ANY of the goddamn credit or attention or kudos it deserves. Beauty in the Ashes of Our Lives by Fulgance. I swear to you, you will never read something as beautifully heartbreaking as this. This fic resides in my mind rent-free. Basically any work by Fulgance is amazing, but this fic— oh God, my heart cannot take it sometimes.

10. Arthur's Bane pt. 1

Fuck, that episode was a masterpiece. You know, if it was all in my hands, I would've magic revealed at this particular episode. It was just.. the perfect opportunity. King Arthur in his glory, beginning of the season, enough time for Arthur to fully understand the depth of what Merlin did for him. Also, the range Arthur was given starting from here; God it's what we deserved. I always blame the writers for being inconsistent with his characterization (s2 and all), but they beautifully crafted it in the end, and it was their perfect chance to even explore the whole extent if only they made the magic reveal earlier.

Fic rec: Our broken pieces by @aramblingjay. Okay so this fic rec isn't necessarily linked at all to the episode, but I can't, in good conscience, recommend fics and not include it. Technically context wise it fits s5, for in it you see Arthur in his grandeur as king. This shall be my only exception because it's the only fic that was able to make me cry. Truly, I never shed tears, but in this, my heart stuttered. The fact that it is so unnoticed makes my blood boil because of how much praise it deserves. I can never recommend it enough.

To conclude, BBC Merlin has a powerful hold on everyone because of the fact that they knew how to eternalise it. It is significantly unique in its interpretation of legendary figures. I think I watched nearly all adaptations of King Arthur throughout the years, but even with how great some really are, to me none compare with this sword-swishing, banter-driven, CGI-messing, emotionally-killing 2008 show.

Honorary mentions:

| The Labyrinth of Gedref | Gwaine | Le Morte D'Arthur | Lancelot | The Coming of Arthur | The Moment of Truth | The Hunter's Heart | His Father's Son | The Darkest Hour |

[More fic recs]

[huellitaa]

hello hello huelittaa 👋✨ do u have any tips for someone struggling with motivation to workout? or even to take a simple walk? thank uu 🤍

bee's physical activity handbook: motive 🎀 . ݁₊ ⊹

hiiii ml!!!!!!!! 🫶🏻🩷💗 sorry this has been sitting in my inbox for a few days BUT IM HERE NOW !!!!! honestly this is something i also struggle with myself ,, i am still recovering from depression personally so this is still difficult for me sometimes too but these are some things i do !!!! ♡

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 1. prepare urself for the possibility

so since i know i have this problem a lot, it helps me to be prepared for this in advance. i actually have a whole notion page filled with a table of letters to myself in specific situations i find myself in a lot, this included, and have a whole archived stored of cute photos and motivation and things like articles and videos and tumblr posts on the main page and in the letters that make me wanna get up and do shit and its my LIFESAVER. (should i make a post on this?)

but i'd suggest to keep a note or page or document , physical or digital, filled with just motivation for this specific thing, like things you like about it, photos romanticising working out or going outside, songs that motivate you, etc etc etc. the list goes on but you get the point ♡

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 2. detective chapter: analysis! ♡

figure out why you dont want to. this is the main thing that helps me and its so simple but once u figure out the root u figure out the rest and this applies just the same here too. is it laziness? mental health? exhaustion? overworking? burnout? you won't be able to continue until you haven't found the actual problem. it's like trying to travel with no path to travel on.

💭𓂃 ࣪˖ 3. pep talk!

one thing i do that helps me the most is literally just lay in bed or wherever you are where ur procrastinating and thinking about this over and over and going back and forth whether to do it or not is to force the thoughts out (literally. u can envision it if it helps!) and deadass bully myself into doing it 😭😭

(🗒🎀 note: i've also found it helps for some people to do this in the mirror, just so ur face to face w urself as it were. plus u get to admire urself at the same time so its a win all around)

if ur not into harsh motivation, another thing i love, esp when im not feeling great enough to deal w harsh motivation is pretend ur giving advice to a friend or ur child in this position. this is one of the greatest pieces of advice ive ever gotten i literally cannot stress this enough. do this‼️ p.s. you can do this in ur head or out loud. i usually do some mix of both because i am a professional at talking to myself constantly literally all the time

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 4. use gratitude in ur favour!

one thing i like to do is essentially guilt trip myself into doing it. erm. you can also call this gratitude it sounds a lot better. think of how grateful you are to even have the opportunity to go outside safely to go for a walk, to be able to work out and keep urself healthy, because there's always someone who's not going to be able to do those things. it is a privilege to live your life and this should be classed as one too.

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 5. all about the outlook

another thing i love that falls into the category of motivation is treating it as an act of love and luxury rather than a chore and changing ur outlook on it. for example,

"oh, i have to do this or i'm a failure" or "i really don't want to do it today"

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ into...

"i deserve to do this for myself because i deserve to be taken care of and kept in good health."

and i find this makes me so much more open to it because you do deserve it.

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 6. romanticism; obviously!

okayyyy i know you hear this EVERYWHERE but ‼️its‼️because‼️its true‼️ romanticism is my LIFE not a day goes by where i dont act like im a silly girl in a pink girly shoujo world, and i do this even more so when i dont wanna get up and do simple tasks like this.

some things that give me motivation via romanticism is getting dressed up and cute even if i'm just going for a walk and listening to music and appreciating the world (🗒🎀 note: i love taking pictures or going on different routes whenever i go for walks! it makes the experience so much sweeter and more enjoyable ♡), or putting on cute clothes, loud music and grabbing a pretty waterbottle and hyping myself up to do even just 10 mins of pilates because something is always better than nothing!!!!!!!!!!!

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 7. something is better than nothing

with the last note from my previous point in mind, try and always do just a little bit, even if it's not the amount you intended. say you wanted to workout for 20 minutes every day, but you really weren't feeling it today? do 10 instead. this way ur still doing something. we always have tomorrow. take it at ur own pace. you wanted to go running every day? just go for a walk. you can always try again. there is no limit on how many attempts you have with these things. this is always better than just doing nothing at all. this is basically finding the middle ground when you do these things. which leads me onto my final point ,,♡

✨️𓂃 ࣪˖ 8. finding the middle ground

the no.1 thing in all of this is please don't beat urself up for it if you don't feel like it sometimes, but still keep to it as best as possible. say for example you really didn't want to one day but you had no real reason not to, you should still do it. but if your emotional or physical health or anything like that is in a bad place right now, then allow urself to skip for a day or two. dont beat urself up over it, but keep to it when and where you can because i know its difficult sometimes ♡

all my love, and u got this!!!!!!!!!! 🩷🫶🏻💬💗🎀

[night-unfurls-its-splendour]

Hi! I was just wondering who's your favorite phantom actor?

Can be from any Poto play, or movie, or anything really.

I'm really curious!

This and similar questions have been popping up so much for me in the last week lol

I like to be extremely specific so I will give you a few of my favourites

I have been meaning to re-examine my favourites for a while now

So my favourite overall, my number one, my blorbo, the phantom closest to my heart is always going to be Gerard Butler. Say what you want about his singing, but ain't no other phantom ever done Pleading Eyes (tm) like that man.

For stage Phantoms the one who has a hold on my mind that just will not let go is Tim Martin Gleason. I love a tall phantom. I love that in the title song he does not order Christine to sing for him, he asks her. He conveys, with his intonation, that he asks for the honour of having her sing for him. I love how expressive he is. This man made so many choices.

Vocally I think the best singer that has ever played the phantom is John Owen Jones. But I think my favourite phantom Vocally is Tomas Ambt Kofod, because he--more than ANY other Phantom I have heard, sounds like Erik. His voice is remarkable in its smoothness and delicacy, but also very powerful.

He's also so sensual and gentle. He loves to administer loving touches and caresses to his Christine.

His final lair is also devastating

The Phantom actor I think I respect most is Ethan Freeman. This man has such a dedication to this character and to the book specifically. He refused to read Phantom by Susan Kay because he didn't want an apocryphal version of the character to influence his interpretation, which he specified modeled off of Leroux's Erik, adding touches pulled directly from the novel such as kissing (or almost kissing) the hem of Christine's robe during "Stranger Than You Dreamt It", as Erik kisses the hem of her dress in the book.

Seen here in the West End in 1995 with Jill Washington:

And here, in Essen, 11 years later with Anne Görner:

It seems that over time he evolved this moment to the point that he appears to abandon the thought before he brings it close to his lips--probably thinking he's not even worthy of touching her vestments.

He's got an almost faerie-goblin quality to his interpretation. Like he's just scuttled out of the Black Forest. He also leans into the idea of Erik-as-Magician

He's not afraid to be sensual either, though.

I think the most emotional phantom is Earl Carpenter. One of the first full boots I ever watched was Earl Carpenter with Rachel Barrel. His Music of the Night changed my brain chemistry forever. The gentleness! The vulnerability! The vacillation between confidence and fragility!!

The way he would jostle Christine a little when he caught her, his face a picture of panicked concern!

Though I think his interpretation of Erik as (for want of a better word) asexual is a little wacky (considering the text), it strangely works in favour of Erik's particular brand of sensuality, and it paired particularly well with Rachel's timid and apprehensive interpretation of Christine (which I generally dislike--here, though). And his singing has only improved with maturity. The raw emotion of his All I Ask of You (Rooftop Reprise) in his 2023 run is shattering. Absolutely shattering.

My favourite feral Phantom is without a doubt Scott Davies. If you ever want to see the most unhinged "Let these freaks be together" e/c show you've ever seen you have GOT to watch Scott Davies with Meredith Braun. Ethan Freeman's got the Goblin King energy and Anthony Crivello has the Sewer Gremlin vibe, but if you ever want a Phantom with a real primal streak, you can do no better than long-standing West End understudy Scott Davies:

This guy tackled the role with a ferocity and an audacity that you don't generally find outside of Russian productions.

His Phantom hands? Oh Lordy!

And the best part is that Meredith's Christine was picking up EVERYTHING he was laying down. Her Christine is just as mad, just as feral, just as unhinged. And especially paired with such a hearty goodfellow Raoul as Matthew Cammelle--Raoul would have done well to gtfo of there. He was NOT prepared to handle this lmao.

And then there's Ted Keegan. Who for me will always be the Phantom that got away. If I had just done a little more research before--just three months into my poto obsession--booking my tickets to see phantom before it closed on Broadway, I might have had the transcendent experience of seeing Ted Keegan live. As it was, I had no idea he was even still playing the phantom, and wound up with Ben Crawford instead.

And I would be remiss if I finished this list without naming Thomas James O'Leary. Like Ethan Freeman, O'Leary leans into Erik's ghostly persona, with a magician's touch. I think he took a lot of inspiration from Lon Chaney's Phantom (note the position of his hands here).

His "Sing for me~" is one of my all time favourite line readings and got a very embarrassing reaction out of me when I first heard it.

And then, as if that wasn't enough, there was the moan.

[jun-of-love]

Until I Found You - choi seungcheol

genre: fluff, angst, choi seungcheol

pairings: scoups × yn

tw: injuries

words: 1.2k

a/n: i was listening to 'UntiI Found You' by Stephen Sanchez (i'm a basic bitch, leave me alone) and I saw this interview of him saying how he has written the song for his one true love called Georgia and he would never love anyone the same ever again and I just had to write this so..here we go ig :)

header credits: @saythestuff

Seungcheol was tired.

The echoes of fans’ screams on his every move were still ringing in his ears, the adrenaline active in his body. Yet, he felt nothing as he sat in the backseat of his van, which, considering the amount of time he spent in it, was more of a home to him than his apartment. He saw buildings rush by and could only think of how it was so similar to time. Time too, seemed incomprehensible to him when he moved so fast. Seungcheol closed his eyes, and just like routine, a slideshow of his favourite memories began.

It starts with the time he met you for the first time. He was sitting at the counter of his favourite little music instrument shop, where he was lucky to find a job as well. You were in a lilac hoodie, leggings, and ponytail, he remembers it clear as a day. You wandered around looking at instruments for a while, clueless and careful not to touch anything, until you saw the keyboard, which you rushed towards, and played ‘My Heart will Go On’ so perfectly, that Seungcheol almost thought you were trained for several years. It was until you started coming in almost every other day and played the same song every time, he figured out that was the only song you could play. And also, that you were quite tone deaf, and learned this song from sheer will-power.

He had made the first move. Working as a cashier in store, which happens to be the favourite place of quite possibly the cutest girl ever, has its own benefits. You hardly ever bought anything, except for CDs of some niche classical musicians, just sat in the store reading your book or doing some work. Luckily, Seungcheol knew how to enter a girl’s heart – through shitty instant coffee, so that he did. And it worked. Soon enough, you were laughing softly at his jokes, listening to his mixtapes, and manifesting for his dreams.

Seungcheol had underestimated how much love y/n had to give. You came in his life when he was struggling, and stuck to him like superglue through every trial he went through. You shared his mixtapes on every platform possible, made every café you visited play his music, made sure each and every friend and acquaintances of yours had heard his music. You would constantly DM all the artists and famous producers, as if they would read them and give Seungcheol the opportunity of a lifetime. You paid for promoting his music on Instagram- from whatever was left from your stupid copywriting salary after college fees took most of it. Seungcheol promised and swore on the heavens and hell, that he would give his beautiful girlfriend the life of her dreams, where he would fund everything and beyond, she would write as many books as she wanted, and they would live the happiest life a couple could dream of.

It seemed like fate was in his favour. Another day that he remembers as if it was yesterday. It was the weekend and Seungcheol was cooking with you in his apartment. Laughing at how not a single onion was getting properly cut by him, and him arguing that it doesn’t matter if it’s all going to be cooked at the end of the day. The conversation just ended with the stove turned off, and you in his arms. Regardless of how his life was going, his pathetic financial situation, and constant rejection from companies, he felt safe, at home with you in his arms. He felt like everything in the world would work out if you were there with him. And that’s what happened. His phone rang at that moment- it was a famous music production company, wanting to scout him based on his mixtape they heard playing in a café.

Rest was history. He was the S.Coups. You had giggled a little when you heard his work name, but admitted it was cool. Seungcheol got bigger and bigger opportunities. His handsome face went viral, and soon he went from a music producer to a bestselling artist. His once role models were now on his waiting list. Seungcheol felt like it was all a big fluke, and that he didn’t deserve this- but you were right there, with your healing smile- reassuring him that he had it in all this time.

But when one rises up too fast, life has a way of showing the ground, and fame is a bitch. Soon, your relationship was all about him. It was his conveniences, his schedule, his career, his image- yet you were fine with it, as long as he was happy. Seungcheol remembers the horrible day, when you waited for him all day in his apartment to tell him that you had won a writing competition by a publishing house. It was one the big break you were waiting for, and he just came home, dismissing you and falling asleep on the couch because he had drunk too much on a broadcast. He woke up the next day to find himself on the bed, in comfortable clothes and covered in a blanket. It was when he found the tear stained certificate on the table, that he realised how badly he had fucked up. Yet..yet you forgave him without him having to beg for forgiveness. Because you understood. You always did. Seungcheol wondered what your last straw would be, and prayed that he would never see the day it breaks.

Unfortunately, the day came. You had gotten into an accident, leg broken and several small fractures in the body. You had never experienced pain like this before, and only wanted Seungcheol in the room. Yet, he came four hours after he got the news, because he ‘had to’ complete his music show broadcast. This is the day he wishes he could forget. You were covered in bandages, but the pain in your eyes only reflected the pain in your heart. He was on his knees in the hospital room, and you looked at him in complete apathy.

“I have gone through too much because of you. I cannot take it anymore. You don’t have to do anything, I will remove myself from your life. You will not see me again.”

Seungcheol felt like his life had been taken out from him. He begged and groveled, promised to leave his career, sent thousands of flowers and gifts, wrote multiple letters- only to find them in the trash the next day. He kept persisting, until one day you just left, with no trace of where you were going. Just gone.

As if on cue, his van stopped rather harshly. “Sir, we’re here.” His driver woke him up. As he regained his senses, Seungcheol noticed the book he had been holding tightly all this time. Fifth one in the popular series written by y/n, the name adorned on it in calligraphy. He opened the first page, and the words on it broke his heart into a million pieces.

“To my husband Joshua, thank you for always being there for me.”

Maybe in the next life. He will find you and love you like you deserve. The next life.

[seoul-bros]

The Future of Jikook

After watching the video and GMA soundcheck performance on Friday and then seeing all the contradictory reactions on line to the song and its reception, I have been quietly mulling things over here in my little corner of the internet.

There are so many fan feelings conflating here. Those who want JK to turn into the BTS Harry Styles, those who are still smarting over the way changes to BB affected the trajectory of FACE, those who feel that the breakout of one member is a threat to ever seeing BTS as a band again. It makes for a tense, emotional and chaotic time on-line especially on Twitter where people tend to have a knee jerk reaction to anything that is said and nuance is completely lost.

Look into yourself and I am sure you will find a whole load of contradictory emotions lapping at your consciousness right now. What I have found myself thinking however, is how does all this noise affect the members and in particular Jimin and Jungkook?

Making Choices

One question that came to mind was why did Jungkook pick this song for his solo debut. What is it that he likes about it and how does that differ from the way SB sees or is marketing the song. During Festa 2023 I commented on the transformation that JK has been through since last year. He has made a conscious effort to shake off the maknae part of the golden maknae starting with his deal with Calvin Klein and all the swooning I am seeing on Tumblr shows that he has succeeded. As Yoongi said, JK is all grown up.

Then I was thinking about JK's musical choices, who and what he listens to and I remembered earlier this year he sang the Sam Smith and Kim Petras hit Unholy on one of his lives. If you also recall he later scolded Jimin for being prudish about the song on his own live.

Twitter Link

JK was obviously ready to move into more explicit territory even then. So what about Seven made him think this is the song that launches me as the new and more mature JK.

I think for one thing, the lyrics are sensual and not gender specific. I am in the "loving you right" lyric camp because it gives a more mutual gratification feel to the song in keeping with the other lyrics as opposed to the macho stud, I'm a sex machine, version.

Jungkook wants to ease his lover's mind, he want to trace their lines, he loves how they wrap around him when they make love, he is devoted, his love runs deep and when they are together he wants to make sure his lover is satisfied and feeling that afterglow.

So yes JK is going to be talking about sex from now on along with almost everyone else in the Western music industry. Along with Jimin for example. As a side note, I still don't quite understand my overwhelmingly visceral reaction to the Like Crazy MV. It's f**king art and so is he.

Now SB and his cronies know the audience they are playing to and we will get symbolically het videos both for this and what is rumoured to be his completely English speaking solo album but even this video, which to be honest I have dumped in favour of the live performance and the choreo video, went for humour rather than full out fangirl wish fulfillment. I mean that may also come but I get the feeling that somewhere down the line they are going to need to pivot hard.

What do jikook want?

Secondly, I was thinking what do jikook want both severally and individually. All the members have an enviable work ethic and a deep love of music but the emphasis that these two and JHope put on performance is legendary. Look at Jimin here monitoring between shoots for his music shows in the behind the scenes video this week. He is serious about giving his best even when he himself is not in the best physical condition.

They are both ambitious and are looking for longevity in the industry and importantly, and prefacing this with an, in my opinion, this is something they want to do together. Neither wants the other to get left behind and I think that is what they are fighting for right now.

Whatever you think about their bond, it cannot be dismissed and the sequence of events of the last few weeks for me just reinforces that. Everyone noticed the way their relationship was highlighted in the Beyond the Story book (just started my copy yesterday but I couldn't resist the spoilers last week) to the extent that Variety went on a fishing expedition which JK expertly deflected.

Jimin is in New York right now and Jikook were seen dining together the night he arrived. We don't know what Jimin's schedule is but we can assume that he will take advantage of the visit to also support Jungkook as he has done with the other members when his schedule allowed. Jungkook is important to Jimin and vice versa.

Has everyone already forgotten the amount of promo that JK has done for Jimin over the last few months. Here he is listening to JKIVE's Golden Hour who we later found out was collaborating with Jimin on Angel Parts I and II.

So this is the perspective that I am going to adopt from here on in when I react to content. I am going to ask myself does my reaction help or hinder jikook in being able to continue working together towards their aim of further success in the music industry. I will veto anything designed to drive a wedge between them, be that from the company or the fans and I will continue to work hard for them in the way that a fan can buying, streaming and supporting their music and their content. There is even word on the grapevine that there maybe some jikook collaboration and/or content on the way. I'll be watching out for that.

Wow quick update something is definitely coming.

Post Date: 16/07/2023

[ego-meliorem-esse]

dude but the whole face family is a mess of mental disorders and shit. At least if you want to nitpick. Australia and Murica are both ADHD, Canada a depressive lil shit, England is autistic and france bipolar as fuck. I'm still figuring out new Zealand so I can make bingo!

What happened to hi hello how are you 🥲

Im fucking kidding lets go

I have many thoughts on this topic. I just wanna say first that i dont really want to talk about specifically what mental disorder or whatnot each of these characters have. I have my personal hc that i keep private just cus ive strayed so far from canon or even the classic hetalia 2014 country stereotyping. They are my blorbos in the purset sense of the word. So, i feel like if i told you “yeahh murica is adhd on legs” i think it would come across as insensitive.

But on the other hand, in the past 2 years that ive been in group therapy on and off, i have come to be comfortable with talking about mental disorders and dont find it as triggering or offensive as i know some people do. Which is also very valid. People deal with things the best they can and when youre in the trenches of ocd, having a weirdo (me ✊😎) say a fictional character is going through it, it might not sit right. So i wanna keep this as non triggering as possible.

As almost everything i hc, this is something I’ve looked over. And i do agree to a point. Alfred is definitely someone who exhibits traits like excessive talking, impulsiveness, interrupting conversations, difficulty focusing at something that he finds little interest in etc etc. He is easily distracted and tends to find certain people boring. But he also does not have time management skills and he does not forget tasks and plans. Could this be adhd? Sure. Does it have to be? Of course not. So i tend to leave it up in the air. Some people might find comfort in interpreting it as adhd and some would rather stay clear. Both viewpoints equally valid.

I truly dont know about Jack or Arthur. Eleanor too. Honestly i dont really try to make up disorders for them. One thing i dislike is the labeling. If someone, even a silly character, does show traits of some disorder, id rather not have it outright mentioned. It can be cristal clear that Matt has a full on depressive episode, but let me figure that one out myself, chief. I am all in favour of making these fuckers complex and give them shit to shovel, but the moment we start throwing mental disorder labels around, i think the focus strays. But again, only my preference. To someone else, its a comfort.

However, as he is my knight of the highest order, my highest ranking babygirl, my worst punching bag: Matt is depressed as shit. He functions but, God, at what cost?

Does he have depression? Probably. Will i ever make a serious post about his depression specifically? Probably not.

Francois though. He has no disorders, no hardships or difficulties. Makes it easier for me to actively and effectively hate. We are currently negotiating a stalemate, as ive, just today, heard Sous le ciel de Paris after forgetting that song existed. Good fucking song tho. Willing to negotiate the terms of Francois’ surrender.

[bharv]

okay but now your comment's inspired me: how about Gale trying to spoil Glim? maybe it's one of the times it fails horribly, maybe it's the first time she actually accepts it

“It’s a rare vintage. You can tell by the cork. This style of corkage was last used in the 1380s in Cormyr, so it’s had a good century to develop.”

“Gods, Gale. I don’t know what to say.”

It had been quite the find, squirrelled away in the corner of a street trader’s wares who evidently had no idea of its true value. Gale had won it for a song, and had kept it close to his chest, away from the eyes of Astarion or, Gods forbid, Shadowheart.

“I thought,” he says with as dashing a smile as he can muster and, not to be too immodest, it was quite the picture as he knew from copious hours in front of a mirror as a lad checking, “that perhaps we could-”

“Take it to the vintner down in the wide! Gale we could get a pretty penny for this. Enough to get some proper provisions from Rolan. Even with his discounts the best arcane items are hardly cheap.”

He can feel his heart drop as she looks up at him, smiling so wide that he can’t help but smile back. She was right, there were some excellent books to be had, and useful enchanted items, and she would surely be able to get the best price possible.

“Gale. I’m missing something, aren’t I?”

“No! Not at all. It’s a splendid idea. We could end up drinking away the very nectar that could balance our favour in the battles to come, and all we would have to show for it is a headache come morning. No. Your idea is best.”

“You think I’m worth that bottle of wine? Gale, you’ve seen me drink swill that was likely brewed in an old boot.”

“Granted, yes, that might be true. But,” he adds, kneeling down and taking her hand to kiss softly. “You are worth the finest things this world has to offer, and worlds beyond this world at that.”

She smiles at him, taking his hand and kissing it back. “Well. We can’t drink it in the street. Why don’t I get us a room, just the two of us?”

“Oh,” he says with a mocking edge of concern. “But how will we ever afford such a thing?”

“I’ll sell the boots from my own feet.”

“Well, don’t do that. What will you drink it from?”

“Hush you. Come on. I know just the place.”

[acaplaya-musings]

I'm a day late but I still wanted to acknowledge the fact that it's now been 5 years since the release of VoicePlay's cover for Oogie Boogie's Song! It's VoicePlay's second-most-viewed video, currently sitting at 13.25 million hits(!!!), and, like the case for many other people, it was my first ever introduction to VoicePlay.

Storytime! (On my first introduction to/first experiences with VoicePlay):

So I didn't find the video immediately after its release, but the fact that I found it at all was basically due to me setting myself up as the perfect target audience. Firstly, I'm a big Disney fan, have been since I was a young kid (as to be expected), and although I didn't actually watch The Nightmare Before Christmas in full until December last year, I was still familiar with a lot of its music. I have an old Disney Christmas album which starts out with Christmassy songs, but ends with songs from various Disney movie soundtracks (idk why), and it includes What's This, Oogie Boogie's Song, and Jack's Lament. And furthermore, each October I would watch the This Is Halloween intro scene from the movie on YouTube.

Secondly, at the time, I was a fan of at least some stuff by certain acapella and acapella-adjacent groups and artists. Straight No Chaser, Pentatonix, Peter Hollens, Nick Pitera, Jon Cozart/Paint, Todrick Hall, y'know. (Although I only watched/listened to covers of songs where I already knew the originals, because why would I listen to cover artists doing songs I didn't already know? Right? (I was naive)).

So it was late October when I finally clicked on VoicePlay's Oogie Boogie's Song. It had been sitting in my Suggested Videos sidebar thing for at least a couple of days iirc before my curiosity gave in (and seriously, it's quite a unique and striking sort of video thumbnail compared to most other VoicePlay thumbnails; something that perhaps worked in its favour?) And well, here's what I had to say about it on my Discord server:

(Little did I know that that E1 was not, in fact, the lowest goddamn note I would ever hear, lol)

But actually, that wasn't the first post I made about VoicePlay/Geoff. This was:

(In my defense of the description/comparison, I had been watching a lot of Unraveled and Overboard videos on Polygon's channel and it was the best description I could think of at the time).

So yeah, I fell in love with Geoff right from that video (I do love a man with a threatrical streak, and obvious bonus points for the hair!), and that crush was further solidified with videos like Panic In 4 Minutes (which I loved), and Queen In 5 Minutes (which I adored).

Also I just have to share this post/comment of mine, because man, Apollo's Dodgeball really side-swiped if not just straight up hit me with this one huh?

(For clarification, this was about 6 or 7 months before Geoff started making his own song covers on his personal channel, where he of course typically sings with "clones" of himself)

But like what I did with other singers and acapella groups, I mostly watched/listened to songs where I knew the original, including for Geoff's channel once it began (though I did also watch Headless Horseman and Mele Kalikimaka), and so yeah, I missed out on a lot at the time! So I wasn't "fully" invested yet, and I think I stuck around till like maybe late 2021 ish? Idk I remember watching Geoff's Monster Mash video, but I can't remember whether I watched VP's Friends On The Other Side at that point or not.

But then, in late October 2023, YouTube stuck Geoff's cover of Jack's Lament in my Recommended section, and I knew even before I watched it that it would be the best thing ever, and it was, and then I came across VoicePlay's cover of Hellfire, and well, the rest is history! 😄

So yeah, Oogie Boogie's Song might not have been the video that actually pushed me "down the rabbit hole", but maybe I might not have come across Jack's Lament four years later without it, or at least I wouldn't have had those memories or that degree of familiarity that made the video extra special, which helped make me want to go catch up on everything I had been missing out on.

In summary: Oogie Boogie's Song you will always be famous <3

[mrs-monaghan]

Hey I’m new to bts and I love Jikook although I don’t believe they’re a couple yet because. My friend advised me to watch the original bts content before watching the shipper videos because they’re misleading. I’ve been watching all vlives, bang tan bombs, award shows, Bon voyage, and ITS. When I watched all those, I noticed that Jimin gives Tae more attention than any other member, I noticed that Jk gives Jin, and Tae more attention, V gives Jimin and Jhope more attention. I also noticed that the way Jikook communicate is normal and nothing suspicious about it. I then decided to watch Jikook videos because I accidentally watched one when I was searching for Jimin’s song serendipity and came across the Jikook serendipity analysis. I’m now in the rabbit hole. I came across your page and you talked about “the news article that was ready to out Jkk’s relationship back in 2018”. I just wanted to know where you heard that and if there is any proof because I’m a person who doesn’t dwell on conspiracies but rather proof. Another thing, did they really get married because most of the videos mentioned how they got married during their trip to Tokyo. Another thing, are there any pictures of them hangout and living together. Thank you.

You watched BV and noticed Jimin gives V more attention? You watched original content and noticed that JK gives V and Jin more attention?

I am so confused as to what you're talking about. I would bite if u said JK giving Jin more attention but V? What exactly are u watching? Are you sure its not that shipper content that you say you're avoiding? Specifically tkk content? Which ftr you will rarely find Jikook manipulated content. I'm not saying it doesn't exist but its rare. We don't need to manipulate. They give us everything on a silver platter.

I shared the dispatch thing not long before this scroll lower u will see it. No, Jikook are not married. They can't be married. And even if they did it wouldn't be recognised in SK. And at the time of them going to Tokyo, Japan hadn't recognised gay marriage yet. Jikook married as far as I know its something Jikookers like to say coz they act like a married couple. But they have been spotted with matching rings on more than one occasion which is a reason for suspicion.

I already don't like u from your V comment but sure let's look at a few things.

I always bring this up because no one ever talks about it but I honestly love it so much and it really tickled me.

BV season 5 episode 6. Vmin sleep on the bed

JK makes the bed the next morning. Because Jimin is one spoilt boyfriend, alright? But when Vmon slept on that same bed, JK told them

JK definitely favoured Jimin over V there anon.

Run BTS episode 71 JK makes a big pancake for Jimin because he had a penalty to do

The kicker is though, anon. That Jin too was doing the same penalty.

Why didn't JK make him a pancake too? Doesn't that seem like JK played favourites with Jimin and not Jin? 🤔

In the Soop season 1 episode 6. We found out V asked JK to speak casually with him

But JK refused because;

Meanwhile we have him going Jiminah! Jimin! Jiminssi! Everywhere all the time. So again anon, JK refused V one thing but has no issue doing it with Jimin.

Bon voyage season 3 episode 4 after Tkk did laundry they went upstairs and JK only checked on Jimin.

He did not check on Jin behind him.

At this point I'm just offended that you haven't picked up on my favourite thing about Jikook and that's satellite Jeon/Jikook. You don't even need compilations to see this. Anything you watch. Anything at all. They are always next to eo. Always.

They're literally always together. And JK always chooses Jimin. Not V and not Jin. Not anyone else. No matter what you watch.

Me thinks you need to rewatch what you already did because you missed everything.

Like Mizgator said, you're blind if you don't see it

[changbinsboobs]

Changbin's Current Love Life 31.8.24

First things first he's not in a relationship.

He's not having any crushes either, nor entertaining anyone at this current time.

He's focused on his self-growth and getting himself to a position/state he wants to be. He's building himself. I would even say he's remastering himself.

He has rejected lots of people and left lots of crushes behind, and i believe he has had his fair share of heartbreak in his love life. From both sides i would say.

I think he has been pretty unlucky in his love life till now. That's why he's taking a break (i believe a longer break too, I'm seeing webs😂 i think he hasn't been in the game for a while) from all that dating/relationships stuff. Quite a contrast ti the rest if his life cuz he generally seems like a very lucky person overall. Very gifted, with lots of good people around him and he seems to me like opportunities just keep flowing his way. Someone that gives the vibe of being "gods favourit".

He has invested sooo much energy and time and just himself in vain, shallow, mismatched and even toxic relationships that have taken from him more than they have given. I think this would be his Achiles Heel and the one thing he doesn't have. Like he has it all, but he doesn't have that. Or at least that's how he feels.

I think with all the success he has had with his career, finances, popularity among people and friends, luck with his family, academical success yada yada yada - he has reached a point where as satisfiying those things once were - they don't bring him the fulfillment he once had. I think he feels a certain emptiness and maybe even a bit of aimlessness? Don't get me wrong i think he still lives doing music, but being an idol is not what it once was to him and as he has grown more mature and satiated his greediness for sucess - his needs have moved elsewhere and now he's really thirsty and greedy for love. I think thats why he has so many spilled cups - cuz he has felt that way for a while now and has eagerly tried to find the missing piece, but its not that easy as all of the other stuff. And so now he has come to a point where he "waits".

I think this is a lesson for him to bring him down to earth a bit and to humble him. Not that he's not humble. He is. But thats a different kind if humbleness im talking about. Like, he has had so much given to him in terms of options. I believe he's someone that has always had the opportunity to choose. And whatever he chose it would've been good. Of course he has to put in lots of work into what he does, we see that now in his songs and performance etc. but for him it was always easier than for others. His odds for success are higher. Even if he doesn't succeed and excel, he doesn't fail. And if he were to ever fail, he would have a safety net from steel and gold, with people on every corner waiting for him to choose from which end of the net he wants to get down. And then when he does he gets his hand held each step, not even that, he's carried. Thats the image im getting in terms of what i mean he has had it easy compared to others. (Small note i believe any hate and ignorance etc that might come his way is genuinely nothing but pure jealousy from people. Energy can feel energy. Even if people don't know him, they subconsciously feel how full his cup is with the highest quality of wine, and that its golden and adorned with all kinds of diamonds and precious stones...meanwhile the have a few raindrops in their hands.) As i said "gods favourite". But that favour reaches only to a certain point - and this more unlucky part of his life is the one thing to put him on the same level as others. While other people are just regular, he's exceptional - but in turn for that, he has a continuous thirst for something he cannot get until he deserves it in some way i feel like. And it's completely out of his reach or control. I think thats a feeling thats very foreign to him. So thats what i mean by humbling.

I got too much into that specific topic but yeah, i think he has battled with this for a while and has reached a new level of that stage/lesson in his life and i believe his curent focus is on himself and bettering himself as a person. Growing outside of himself and getting reborn. Turning inside, and also reaching further than his arms length. I believe he has been pretty sheltered and has always had a pretty small circle. Like he has kept in his comfort zone most if not all of his life and hasn't done much outside if it for the simple reason the never had a reason to. Until now.

I would say he's on a journey:)

And i see him "praying" for wisdom, for guidance, for a direction. He's "praying" for love. And i don't mean praying in the religious sense but rather he's just reaching out to the universe. As i said above - reaching out beyond his arms length. He's in search of more. Higher meaning. I believe he's someone that has already mastered the physical very very well!!! Probably his good karma from many many successful past lives. And i believe his soulmate (the one he's seeking and praying for and doing all this transformation for) is the exact opposite. I believe his soulmate has always had great luck in the more higher aspects of life (sadly those are way less in a physical world) but little to no knowledge on how to operate the physical world. I think both of them are currently in a metamorphosis state where he reaches out to her, while she reaches out to him. He reaches up for the sky, while she learns how to stand on the ground and when they learn they both will meet in the middle and continue learning from each other and supporting each other.

I feel like there's much more to it but i had to take a break in between the reading and had to go back to it later, which made me lose that train of "thought" i had, and the cards in itself don't show anything else than what i've already talked about so I guess I'll leave it at that. And in a few months i might do another one as a continuation/follow up of this one.

Since this reading was very divinely oriented, involving energy concerning his past lives, destiny, soulmate, karma, purpose, life lessons etc, i think ill do one about such divine orchestration topics soon, as i believe he's someone that has a lot of energy to read about that:)

[nicoroni]

This started as me telling @isleofair about my silly fantasy au idea (which is that Kotetsu and Bunny are royals arranged to be married, they're having the absolute Worst Time, but that is all in the background because FireSky are living a romcom with full shoujo vision and Do Not Notice the shenanigans) and then it became... this little ficlet?

@isleofair loved it, so I hope everyone else does as well! :3

--

Title: FireSky Royalty AU Fandom: Tiger & Bunny Pairing: Keith Goodman/Nathan Seymour Tags: royalty au, ficlet, she/her pronouns for Nathan Seymour, so many background characters

---

Nathan laughs as a man in shining golden armor - aptly named "Golden Ryan" - spins her around the dance floor.

He's surprisingly graceful for someone in a full set of plate - not the decorative armor most people favour for formal events - and she's never been one to turn down a dance. Even if she's fairly certain it's not for her sake, but for that of the Princess of the Blue Rose, who's steely gaze has not left them since Ryan asked for her hand.

The song winds down, the band taking a momentary break, and she allows Ryan to lead her off the dance floor. She ends up with her back to the wall, Ryan's to the dance floor, her hand still in his.

Before he can ask, Nathan assures him, "She's still watching, and I do believe she's at the edge of her patience."

Ryan originally hailed from a kingdom far from here, one that had been left in ruin and had Ryan shunned in disgrace - but he'd made a stunning comeback when he'd rode into the Kingdom of the Blue Rose in his glittering armor, and announced he was to be the Princess' personal knight. (A recommendation from the Kingdom of the Hare surely didn't hurt.)

He grins brightly at Nathan, another piece of him that matches his namesake. "Thank you for your service. I owe you one."

And with a cheeky salute, he saunters back onto the dance floor, spinning several other people - regardless of age or gender - as he makes his way back to his Princess.

Nathan settles into her place, leaning slightly against the wall and enjoying the opportunity to people watch.

The Tiger King and his betrothed, the Hare Prince, are dancing, apparently not noticing the way one song has faded out and is only now transitioning into another. They're nearly nose to nose, moving fluidly together, and seem to be simultaneously arguing.

She hums to herself, watching as they disappear into the crowd of other dancers piling back onto the floor. She will have to keep an eye out for them - the King has been her friend for many years (and ever so briefly, after his beloved wife had passed, he'd been her lover as well) and she wishes the best for him. He certainly has his hands full with this "bunny" as he has taken to calling the Prince.

She spots his young daughter in the crowd, dancing with the Rock Bison - another friend of the King and champion in his own right. Kaede, not yet grown into her title of Tiger Princess, looks youthful and full of joy, exactly as she should. (And if Nathan has to stifle a giggle at the way Bison must bend down to dance with the girl, well, no one is around to hear it.)

She's contemplating what to do next - if perhaps she should find a refreshment, or maybe simply call it a night - when someone in the crowd catches her eye.

He has a head of golden hair - akin to the setting sun, she thinks - topped with a rather unusual gold and silver crown. His ceremonial armor is impractical at best, but she will admit its beautiful as well. The white cape, lined with a deep royal purple, draped over his shoulders would look ridiculous on most people, but she thinks he looks rather dashing.

She recognizes him for who he is - Keith, the King of the Highest Skies, Hero Among Men - before he's even halfway across the room. She would recognize him with her eyes closed, she thinks, simply by the feeling of warmth he brings with him, like being bathed in the light of the sun.

She's no stranger to warmth, being the bearer of the Fire Emblem - as shown by the mark on her bicep - and Champion of Flames herself, but the warmth that follows Keith is different. It radiates from somewhere deep inside him, nourishing everything he comes close to.

The dog at his side, golden as Keith is, in his own ceremonial regalia, would also be a give away. Where King Keith goes, so does Sir John.

Nathan can't help but smile as Keith struggles to reach her, having to stop every few steps to politely decline a dance, or shake a hand, or kiss a baby. It's not right to tease him, she knows, but - and she will admit this to herself if no one else - he's simply too cute for his own good.

He finally reaches her, looking only slightly worse for the wear, with a few hairs out of place and his crown sitting crooked on his head. Sir John sits at their feet, staring up at her with his big brown eyes, his tail wagging almost imperceptibly as he waits to be greeted. He is just as polite as his master, she knows.

"Hello, Your Majesty." She greets, inclining her head just slightly. Perhaps she should curtsy or bow - she's never been quite sure where she ranks in comparison to a King - but Keith has never minded before.

She waits a moment longer, watching as he blushes when she smiles at him, before sinking to her knees to greet John as well. She gets a slobbery tongue across her cheek for her efforts, and the delighted laugh she lets out is the most genuine one of the night.

When she stands again, Keith has squared his shoulders, and is looking at her rather intensely. She wonders if he knows his crown is still crooked.

"Your Majesty?" She prompts, and he lets out a breath in a whoosh of air she feels against her face.

"Just Keith, please."

She smiles again, and reaches out to straighten his crown. Impertinent, perhaps, but it makes Keith's blush rise up to his ears and that makes it worth it.

"Keith." She says, very softly, and his gaze goes soft and liquid. Not for the first time, she thinks about how much he reminds her of the sky, how she sometimes imagines she could fall into his eyes and simply float there. He even carries the scent of fresh spring air with him wherever he goes, no matter the time of year.

"Nathan." He answers, very softly, sounding so terribly besotted that Nathan thinks /she/ may actually blush.

He catches her hand between both of his as she drops it from his crown, and she suddenly longs to feel his skin against hers, without the barrier of his gloves between them.

Keith takes a deep breath, steeling himself again - she sees the way his eyes harden, just slightly, no hint of cruelty there, but determined resolve.

"May I have this dance?"

---

Keith stands on the outskirts of the party, wishing he could fade into the background like Ivan so often does. It's not that he doesn't love his people - of course he loves his people! He loves all people, really - it's just that he hasn't had a moment to himself all day - not unusual, but distressing to him on today of all days - and he really, really needs some time alone.

Well, not alone, exactly.

He watches as Nathan spins around the dance floor, absolutely radiant under the enchanted lighting. Not even her dance partner, the famous Golden Ryan, in armor as bright as his namesake suggests, could possibly outshine her. To Keith, she feels like a lighthouse, a beacon of warmth and safety as he's jostled by the waves of a crowd of strangers. When she smiles, he feels as though he's looking into the very heart of a fire - beautiful and powerful - but with no fear of getting burned.

She looks wonderful every day, of course, but seeing her in something so formal for this celebration is a rare treat. (And speaking of the celebration, King Kotetsu and Prince Barnaby seem to be getting along very well, today - dancing slow and close amongst the rest of the court. It's a nice change, Keith thinks, from the way they'd been arguing only a few days prior.)

Nathan's dark skirt, worn over a pair of striking pink pants, twirls with her as she moves - the red and orange and gold sequins along it's edge sparkle as they catch the light. He can't hear over the noise of the party, but he can imagine the sound her boots make on the marble floor - a gentle click-clack that he associates with her presence, now. Her jacket - black, with roses embroidered in a glittering thread - is left open, revealing much more skin than anyone else here would dare. Keith's attention does not linger on the tantalizing glimpse of bare skin, but instead settles on the vibrant pendant resting on the centre of her chest. She had gifted him a similar one, what feels like centuries ago, and he feels it now like it's burning a hole in his chest - he almost wishes it would, that it would burn straight through his shirt and armor and show all the world that his heart belongs to The Fire Emblem, to Nathan.

A sharp tug on the edge of his cape draws his mind back to the present, and he suddenly remembers he's holding someone's baby. He's mortified to realize he has no idea who the baby belongs to. He tries to look subtle as he glances side to side, seeking out a parent waiting for their child to be returned to him.

As always, it's John who saves him from his wandering mind, and when he glances down the dog is pointing with his nose at a nearby couple.

Keith mouths a silent, "Thank you.", before returning the infant to their delighted parents. They don't seem to have noticed Keith's inattention, and if they did, they don't say anything about it.

He's not ready to talk to Nathan after the debacle with the baby.

John is an incredible companion and has quite literally saved Keith's life on occasion, but he hasn't mastered the art of conversation just yet. (He's very good at it, really, but he can't quite make up for Keith's nervous stuttering.)

Nathan makes him stutter nervously on a good day - he hates to think of how much he'll embarrass himself today, when he's already frazzled and she looks so breathtakingly beautiful.

On the other hand, their necklace is still a blazing, heavy weight against his chest - it feels as though it wants to be returned to Nathan as much as Keith himself does.

Once again, John saves him.

Before he can make a decision, John has his cape between his teeth again, tugging insistently. When Keith doesn't immediately follow his lead, John pushes his head against the back of Keith's knee, nudging him in the right direction.

Keith stumbles forward, and John repeats, nudging Keith's opposite knee this time.

"John!" Keith hisses, trying to look like these steps are intentionally and not like he's drunk. He also keeps a pleasant smile plastered on his face, even as his heart beats wildly in his chest, more and more intense with every step toward Nathan.

They're stopped several times on their journey - with invitations to dance, or talk, or hold another baby - but John doesn't allow Keith to linger. If Keith pauses for too long, John nips at his ankles, unprotected by Keith's useless ceremonial armor.

He catches Nathan's eye when he's no more than a few feet away, and a real, genuine smile curls his lips. He cannot help it, when he looks at her. Warmth spreads from his necklace, suffusing his whole body, so comforting and familiar it makes him a little sleepy.

And then he's standing in front of Nathan, looking slightly upward to continue to meet her gaze, and she's smiling at him, too.

"Hello, your majesty." She greets, inclining her head slightly. She doesn't bow, or curtsy, doesn’t lean into any sort of formality at all, really. Just smiles, and watches him for a touch too long.

Keith can't help but blush under her scrutiny - not because he's afraid of judgement, no, but because of the exact opposite. Because when she looks at him, he feels like he's really being seen for the first time in his entire life - at the very least, since the first time he put on his crown.

And then she's kneeling, and for a split second Keith's mind races, frantically trying to understand what she's doing and why she would be on her knees and- And she's greeting John, as she always does, letting him lick her face and laughing so joyfully, so genuinely that it nearly brings tears to Keith's eyes. How she manages to always be so honest is beyond him, but he loves her all the more for it.

He takes a deep breath, to settle his nerves, to convince his racing heart to settle - it doesn’t work - and rolls his shoulders back, standing straight as he can.

Okay, Keith, you can do this.

John leans against his leg, a comforting weight.

"Your Majesty?" Nathan says, leaning in just slightly, studying his face.

Keith realizes he's been holding his breath, and he lets it all at once, an exhalation that ruffles the feathers dangling from Nathan's earrings.

"Just Keith, please." He tells her, for what must be the thousandth time. It doesn’t bother him, that he must always ask one more time, it seems to be a sort of game between them.

She reaches out, and the tension returns to Keith all at once, bracing himself for some sort of touch, as if preparing for an assault. In truth, he fears that even a brush of Nathan's bare skin against his own would be electrifying, and far too much for him to handle.

Instead, she holds his gaze as she adjusts his crown on his head. He feels the hot blush rise up to his ears - not embarrassment, exactly, but a rush at the intimacy of the gesture. No one else would dare to touch his crown, to be so close, to hold eye contact for so long.

"Keith." She breaths, and Keith feels like every inch of him is going to melt into a contented puddle on the floor, so enamored he is by the sound of his name on her lips.

His lips part. He says nothing, only a split second of a pause and then, "Nathan."

The way she looks at him is more magical than any spell or trick he has ever seen. He feels as though he's laying in the sun on a spring day, basking in the first warmth of the year, the remainder of frost melting away.

He takes her hand in his - begrudging and thanking his gloves in equal measure, for the barrier they provide between his skin and hers.

He takes a deep breath. Feels her hand in his. Feels John's weight against his leg. Feels the pendant against his chest - a little piece of her that has swiftly become a little piece of him, entwined with his heart.

She waits, patient as always, and Keith wonders how long she will wait for him. In his heart of hearts, he knows it's forever. He knows, because he would wait an eternity for her.

"May I have this dance?"

-fin-

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2024: #20

20. LUXEMBOURG Tali - "Fighter" 13th place

Decade Ranking: 73/153 [Above Electric Fields, below Emma Muscat]

For a grand, greatly anticipated return, "Fighter" has always been just there for me. It's summery, upbeat, lightweight and frivolous. Not a shabby, nor a moneymaker. This entry is an FFF (Fun Finale Filler) and it knows it.

How do I know that it knows itself? Well,

BADLY ANIMATED CGI LEOPARDS 😍 😍. You know how I feel about staging tricks like that. They're tacky and ugly and stupid and transparently try to cover up a middling composition.😍 idk, I love Leopards and I love the colour purple, so maybe it was just tacky ENOUGH to be funny, but I stan the decision-making because Tali > Ochman.

It was quite amusing 2 me that Luxembourg made their grand return after 31 years, only to try to throw vast swaths of cash at unnessecary embellishments because they KNEW it wasn't a high flier and needed to throw in SOMETHING, ANYTHING to make it work. Shirtless sexy dancers, badly animated VR, all the pyrotechnics in the world. It feels... very emblematic to them as a country even though this was their first ever modern era contest? "Money fixes everything", no wonder the EBU wanted their opulent arses back.

And it is funny they staged "Fighter" like that because "Fighter" always kind of worked, anyway? It was a plucky power-up song, and a clear qualifier in semi 1 no matter from which position it performed.

It didn't NEED the leopards

it didn't NEED the gratuituous sexual tension lmao

The way to go with a song such as "Fighter" is by finding a balance between tough and cute. The balance swung a bit too heavily in favour of "tough", because "Fighter" just isn't that kind of song, despite the reworks Lux tried to force. It's whimsically French foremost and while "France was historically a militaristic powerhouse,"toughness" suits France historically, nearly everyone associates it with cultural sophostication and romance. (hence why France is always culture focused in Civ, and never the feudal, chivalry-themed warmongering menace it actually was for most of its history ♥)

As ridiculous Fighter's staging got (and how lowkey BAD Tali'Golergant vas Eshkoli's styling was), it still vibed as a fun time. It might just be my latent alcoholic ass imprinting on the tequila sunrise colous scheme, but still. Tali took command of her dancers, showed her inner strength by fistpumping the air and thickened her braids so they no longer resembled antennae.

And she kinda ate those lives, yo.

In semi 1 Lux made for an excellent palate cleanser, a burst of energy after the period of inaneness Rim Tim Tagi Dim left in its wake. I love Raiven dearly and I really like Iolanda, but excitement was not their game. Tali came to the rescue when needed.

In the finale it was less necessary, though it did make Israel stand out as even more miserable to me, so there is that.

Sigh, I have to address the Israeli thing, don't I?

Look, I don't fucking CARE that Tali is proud of her Israeli-Jewish heritage. Nor that she visits the fake country twice a year. Nor that her song was produced by that other israeli Tali. I think her views on the matters are misguided and warped, but I get it. She's going to stick up for her OG country and her people, and we'd be foolish to expect her to do a 180° turn just because we believe she should. She has her stance, I disagree with it, but I can respect it. Civilians aren't responsible for whatever bloodthirsty maniac rules the roost or their actions, regardless of whether they elected them directly or not.

(though I will say that her transparent and overtly cheerful agreement with Joost's DQ all "YAY! HE BROKE THE RULES AFTER ALL ^_^ :claps:" made me ALOL. That DQ is still a grim affair, but lmfao what a scrump cheerleading bitch ♥).

But in a sense I wish Tali had been Israel's entrant himself. The only thing that erases Israel's controversy is their withdrawal, true, and Tali would have beenthe perfect horcrux, but if we WERE to have that country at Eurovision, I'd rather have them with Plucky Apolitical Filler (ft. Three Giant Leopards) rather than Teary Propaganda Ballad (Eurovision Reskin), y'know?

Also note, dear Israeli's, that -by my knowledge- Tali was NOT shunned by the other acts or the fan community, nor by the media and the professional juries, despite being half-Israeli and Jewish and zionistic. The few strays that she did end up catching were by the usual dumbfuck bigots on social media and amounted to nothing. So much for antisemitism, huh?

It's difficult to end the write-up after that rant that had little to do with the performance, so I will just say this: Tali's placement, while a tad high, proved that there's always a place for positivity and acceptance at Eurovision, no matter your background or your political colour.

With retrospection on our side, it makes sense juries would vote for "Fighter" as everyone agreed Nemo should win anyway, allowing them to siphon away twelves like a vacuum on amphetamine. With Croatia, Italy and France picking up the scraps, anyone with a modicum of inoffensiveness would be favoured to do well, (since this finale was HIGHLY jury unfriendly) which also favoured Lux because of the novelty coming with their return.

Ultimately it's our choices in life that define us, and Tali's were to give us a fun time unburdened by shackles of war, and that, in THIS FUCKING YEAR, was worth a lot to me.

THE RANKING:

[mywifeleftme]

363: R.E.M. // Murmur

Murmur R.E.M. 1983, IRS

Some Short, Disconnected Statements on the Matter of Murmur

1. Insert the following into Waring blender

The Velvet Underground, Pylon, the Byrds, Gang of Four, Patti Smith, the Feelies, Joy Division, the Method Actors, Big Star, the dB’s, the Monkees. Press “Blend” button. (I’ve never owned a blender; I don’t know what the buttons say.)

2. Easy formula for a great band

Having one temperamental genius songwriter guy sounds kind of hard to maintain. Have you considered simply getting four people who are really excellent and distinctive at the respective things they do (at least three of them great singers), who all write well, get along, lack substance abuse issues, have good taste, and modest egos? Why don’t more bands do this?

3. Notes on the early discourse

A lot of the things people wrote back in the early ‘80s to champion this band were dumb as hell. R.E.M. weren’t good because they didn’t use keyboards or synths; pop music didn’t need to be returned to its "honest" folk-rock roots; giving them a thumbs up for not wearing flashy clothes and makeup is dork behaviour.

They were good because they made weird music that derived organically from their time (early ‘80s), place (a college town in the South), and selves (bright, independent, adventurous, sincere, ¼ gay).

Anyone who listened to Chronic Town or Murmur, with their post-punky murk and lyrical references to Laocoön and Marat, and thought to themselves, “As yes, the second coming of Roger McGuinn, this will put those effete new wavers to flight,” was an idiot.

4. Veteran of the psychic war

Somewhere around age 22, R.E.M. took over the mantle Metallica had held as My Favourite Band in the World Forever and Ever, and I proceeded to be almost as annoying about them as I had been Hetfield and the boys. I posted a lot about them; rigged “best music” polls on random message boards I didn’t even post on in their favour; cornered people at parties; crowbarred them into playlists; grumpily chose to dislike bands I saw as stealing their shine; etc. etc. Some (some) of this is maybe cute in retrospect, but really: don’t be like this about music. If you love a band this much, learn how to play their songs on an instrument; write a few poems; paint something. Worst case: review them.

5. Learning nothing, 2024

6. Athens: Lyrics & Enunciation

The matter of what exactly Stipe was singing on the early R.E.M. records was a subject of intense speculation, and eventually, parody. Some of the mystery’s in the mixing, some’s in his Georgian accent, and some’s in his enunciation (never quite as mushy as people claimed, but not exactly Ella Fitzgerald either). But most of it’s in the arbitrary decisions he makes with regard to syntax that cause even accurate transcriptions to seem implausible. Stipe is probably a little bit autistic, which goes some way to explaining the impressionistic intuitiveness of his words, and also went to art school, which fetishizes that sort of thing, but he was always shy of people seeing the words to something like “Sitting Still” on the page because he thought he might be exposed as a nincompoop. “Up to par and Katie bars / The kitchen side, but not me in / Sitting top of the big hill / Waste of time sitting still,” goes the chorus, according to at least one gnostic sect, but the important passage is the one everyone agrees on, when the stream of impassioned babble releases into a howled “I can hear you / Can you hear me?”

Later on, when he would sing more clearly over airy arrangements, with the lyrics neatly printed in the booklet, he’d occasionally try one of those old sound-over-sense moves and embarrass himself (“Leaving New York was never my proud” still rankles). But Murmur’s eternal elusiveness is in the way fragments of sense catch your ear from out of its sleeptalk glossolalia:

“The pilgrimage has gained momentum” “Conversation fear” “Lighted, lighted / Laughing in tune” “Hear the howl of the rope / A question” “A perfect circle of acquaintances and friends / Drink another, coin a phrase” “Shaking through / Opportune” “Take oasis” “Heaven assumes / Shoulders high in the room” “Did we miss anything?”

7. Permission to be arbitrary

I remember sitting in the basement of my college house with my old hometown buddy Brad (mostly a metal/classic rock guy), playing him “Shaking Through” and explaining one of the things I love about old R.E.M. is that it’s great music to yell to. I don’t know how much he really got it, but we were drunk and it’s a catchy song, so we howled and made keening, wordless, Stipean noises along with it and the next few until one of my roommates came and asked us to keep it down.

Also: one theory for why cats purr when they’re injured is that the vibrations somehow reduce pain and encourage healing. From many experiences humming these songs while wrapped up in headphones and bedsheets in the middle of a day that’s passing like a kidney stone, I can confirm.

8. Note on the modern discourse: Influence?

Black Francis, Kurt Cobain, Bob Mould, Steve Malkmus, Bob Pollard, and Thom Yorke loved R.E.M. So did, to his own apparent consternation, Metallica’s Cliff Burton. Still, you sit down with someone and listen to those musicians with the goal of showing them the R.E.M. influence (don’t do this, why would you do this?) and it’s honestly pretty oblique. Most of the bands who directly aped aspects of R.E.M.'s early sound were at best pleasantly minor (see Captured Tracks’ Strum & Thrum comp), and the ones who seemed to be listening most closely to their ‘90s efforts were not who you want.

Their ultimate influence was probably simply showing what an art-first, indie-adjacent rock band could accomplish by sticking to their guns and bending the system to their desires instead of being bent by it. They were like a Velvet Underground for the college rock era, except everyone talented who heard them was inspired to start a band that didn’t sound much like them. They always used their spotlight to introduce people to other bands and, when they really got huge, they modeled how to deal with success. There don’t seem to be many R.E.M. stories, Peter Buck’s airplane incident aside, about them being anything other than kind. That’s a fundamentally less exciting type of influence than most other “great” bands have. But I do think it’s kinda cool they were the wise old heads for an entire national movement of alternative music.

8b.

Of course, it still bugs me people don’t think they’re cool. Murmur at least, should be considered cool. And Reckoning, mostly. Chronic Town for sure. Some of Fables. Am I crazy for saying some of Monster and New Adventures even? I’ll stop. I’ll go on.

9(-9). The music

They were a pop band, they were an art band; they sounded like children, and like craggy old men buried in kudzu weed; natural and pretentious; date-stamped and timeless. Decide yourself. Happy 41st birthday Murmur.

363/365

[bts-hyperfixation]

Tempting Tutelage

A Taehyung x Reader Fanfiction

Summer Madness 9/32 When you begin to fall behind in one of your university courses, you enlist the help of your childhood friend, Kim Taehyung, to help you pass the semester.

Please note the course mentioned is entirely made up and therefore complete and utter bullshit and I entirely lost the plot while writing about it...

“Ooooh Taae Taae.” You sing song.

You catch the man walking out of the university music rooms after band practice. You watch as he glances around for who could possibly be calling like that until his eyes settle on you. He looks completely confused to find you are the owner of the cheerful call, but not unhappy.

“Y/N-ah, you haven’t called me that since we were kids. To what do I owe the pleasure?” He asks, strolling away from his band friends towards you.

It’s true, you stopped calling him TaeTae when you were both eleven. You decided he was too old for that nickname now and he had finally grown into his full name. It had been almost a decade since then. You also hadn’t been quite so close since then, drifting apart into separate social circles as you grew older, pulling you away from one another as is natural with kids. It’s a small miracle that neither of you ended up adjusting your life plans and heading to the same university, although that had more to do with the courses they had on offer than ending up together.

“I need a teensy weency favour.” You say batting your eyelashes.

“How teensy weency?” He asks, eyebrow raised in suspicion.

The last time you had called in a favour involved a first-year party and way too many jello shots.

Although technically your mom had called in that favour when she received a phone call from one of

your coursemates asking for your address. She had sent Taehyung to fetch you. That had been the

first time you had spoken to him since graduation.

You hold your fingers out demonstrating a pinch to show how small the favour was.

“Does it involve holding your hair back or sleeping on the floor in any way?”

You cringe as he teases. He had ended up staying with you all night just to make sure you didn’t choke. You had offered him your bed, you were too attached to the toilet anyway, but he refused. Instead, he kept you company on the bathroom floor, dragging your pillows in to protect you from the cold tile. You thanked every star that night that you forked out for the ensuite.

“It definitely does not.” You confirm.

"Great! Let's go get food and you can tell me more. Your treat of course.”

“Of course.”

_______________________________________

“So what do you need me for exactly?” Taehyung asks, muffled slightly by his food

He has always talked with his mouth full. He shoves more of the burger into his mouth as he

waits for you to explain.

“I’m taking ‘Contemporary Music and its Influence on today’s media landscape’ this semester. And I’m flunking hard. But I happen to know you got one of the highest scores when you took it last semester.”

“I did!” He says proudly. “So you want my notes?”

“No, I want you to tutor me. Just reading the information isn’t helping it to sink in. I think I need someone who is actually interested in the topic, professor Dodd is possibly the least inspiring man I have ever heard.”

“That sounds like more than a small favour.” He points out. “Like multiple hours a week worth of a

favour.”

“I’ll make it worth your while Tae Tae, pretty pretty pretty please help me.”

You fix him with your best puppy dog eyes you can muster, the kind that used to get him to give you the last piece of his candy. Being older there is a chance it looks a lot more desperate than cute, but that can’t be hurting your case.

He deliberates for a while, dramatically umming and ahhing while he finishes his meal. He drags his last fry through the ketchup on his plate and then savours every last chew. You tap your fingers annoyed on the tabletop. At this point his only answer could be yes, he just likes to milk the attention, as always: Band geek/drama nerd/debate club extraordinaire, any club with a spotlight. Any club you never had an interest in.

“Okay, when and where?” He asks, putting you out of your misery.

“My place? Thursday nights?”

“Works for me.”

_______________________________________________________

The first session is difficult. It is immediately apparent to Taehyung why you are failing. You lack any semblance of focus. Every time he looks down to check his notes your mind has wandered off. You just don’t seem to want to connect with the material at all. You’re either gazing out of the window or trying to change the topic entirely.

The third time he catches you watching the university football team out of the window he hits you around the head with his notepad. Not enough to hurt, just enough to bring your attention back to him. He stands and huffily closes the curtain.

“Why am I even here?” He grumbles, hands on his hips.

It’s rare to see Taehyung annoyed. He still looks the same as when you were kids, pouting more than scolding. It makes you want to laugh but you somewhat successfully stifle it with what you hope is a remorseful look. Judging by the way his nostrils flair, it’s not remorseful enough. 

“Seriously Y/N, I’m only here because you said you wanted help, I have much better things to be

doing with my time.”

“I know Tae, I’m really sorry. I just don’t get it. I thought it would be more based on modern music, you know the 00’s and 10’s, not the whole of the last century. It’s just so dull...” You whine.

“Now you’re trying to insult me on purpose, I’m sure of it.” He grasps at imaginary pearls, scandalised. “I don’t think I can teach you.”

“It’s not as if I find all music from before we were born unlistenable, just the stuff Professor Dodd choses.” You say, trying to rescue yourself.

Taehyung looks unconvinced like you are clutching at straws just to save face.

“Right, let me think about it over the weekend, I will find some new music you can use to relate to the course and try to salvage your grade.”

“You’re an angel.” You squeak, leaping up to hug him.

He blushes, the tips of his ears going red and hastily pushes you away.

"Yeah, yeah. whatever. What’s for dinner?" He asks changing the subject.

The following session provides a little more promise. Although it feels a lot more like hanging out and listening to music than it does studying... 

Taehyung insisted that each of his carefully crafted music choices was to be listened to in the most authentic way possible. And so your evening began with the two of you laying side by side on his bed listening to a mixtape of his favourite early eighties tracks using a Walkman that looked like it had certainly seen better days. 

You each took a headphone and he talked you through each song that played and how it revolutionised music. Admittedly you were more interested in the passion with which he conveyed his thoughts than the music itself, but it did seem to be working. Every few songs (When a cassette side ended and he had to pause and switch) he would quiz you on the information he had just relayed and you were getting a solid 70%.

You found yourselves drifting closer together until your arms were pressed up against each other. You tried not to focus too much on that. Instead, you immerse yourself in the music, and it really starts to feel like you can understand where Taehyung is coming from when he speaks. He hasn’t told you the title of this song yet, but it feels a lot like the drum is beating in time to your heart and it makes your brain go a little fuzzy.

“Y/N?” Taehyung asks, staring at you.

It is clear in the furrow of his brow that he had tried more than once to get your attention. Misconstruing your concentration for daydreaming, he huffs and pulls the earbud away from you.

“Right, when did I lose you?” He asks putting the cassette player back in the drawer in his bedside table.

"You didn’t this time I promise.” You protest.

He just shakes his head, clearly not believing you.

“It doesn’t matter, I think we were lying down for too long anyway.”

He crosses his small dorm and switches on an old record player. The song that starts playing is pretty, something you might hear during a dance scene in a movie like Grease. It doesn’t capture you the

same way the cassette had, but Taehyung does. He starts to sway to the beat, flourishing his arms and clicking in time to the music. He bites his lips and closes his eyes completely taken over by the music as it plays. He carries on until the song begins to blend into the next.

Then his eyes fall open and find you, his hand extended in invitation.

“Care to dance?”

He doesn’t really give you a chance to answer, taking your arm and dragging you to him. He holds you close and starts to sway again, turning you in circles together.

You relax into his hold, slotting yourself into him like a puzzle piece. Your head fits perfectly in the crook of his neck. You would admit, if he were to ask you anything about the songs as they play through you would not be able to answer a single question. You really can’t recall a single thing he has said since he pulled you into his arms.

“Y/N-ah?” his voice is uncharacteristically calm.

You pull back and look into his eyes, a timid blush has spread across his cheeks, one you are sure is mirrored on your own features.

“Yeah?” You ask, pressing against him a little more.

“I... I don’t think I’m really teaching anymore.”

He coughs to break the tension and lets you out of his arms. He hurries back to the record player and almost scratches the disc with how fast he turns it off.

“I think that’s enough for tonight.” He says, gathering your things for you.

You nod a little disappointed. Although he is definitely right, it feels like your brain might explode if you take in any more information. You take your things from his arms and walk out of his room as he opens the door for you.

“What did you want to get for dinner today?” You ask.

“You know what? I’m not that hungry... Rain check?”

“You’ve always been a terrible liar...” His stomach growls as you speak as if to prove your point.

“I just don’t feel like going out for dinner today.” He shrugs. “But bring your wallet next week, I’ll go all out to make up for this week.”

He grins as wide as he can and you decide not to push the issue. 

_________________________________

The following week proves to be far less intimate as you sit on Taehyung’s bed with him across the room messing around with a boom box you could’ve sworn he didn’t own last time.

When he finally has it working he still doesn’t join you on the bed, opting for the rather uncomfortable-looking desk chair. You write notes as he talks you through different cultural impacts.

It feels like he is watching you but every time you glance up he is conveniently looking anywhere but at you. This goes on for almost an hour before you huff impatiently. You find yourself becoming frustrated with the materials again, struggling to make connections between Taehyung’s words and the textbook contents.

He finally meets your gaze, questioning your little outburst.

“I can’t concentrate.” You complain.

“I can see that.”

He gestures down at your notepad where your last few notes were just an incoherent scribble rather than useful information.

“Let's try and make it more interesting...” Taehyung thinks for a moment.

He bites his bottom lip as his brain works through a possible plan. You find your own mind wandering back in time as you watch him nibble on his lip, not unlike how he looked dancing on his own.

Just as your mind is about to venture off into thinking about how attractive Taehyung has grown up to become, he has an aha moment. His face lights up like someone had actually held a lightbulb above his head.

“Let’s play 20 questions! I’ll play a couple of songs, quiz you on them, and then for every answer you get right you can ask me absolutely anything.” He suggests.

“What makes you think I want to know things about you? I already know all about you.” You point out.

“You know a lot about eleven-year-old me, that’s a lot of missing years... Plus I never said they had to be about me. I’m good friends with the football guys you so admire watching out of your window."

You were surprised he brought up the football guys. Mostly because you had completely forgotten about watching their practice instead of listening to Tae, it was mostly just to give you something else to focus on. You are also intrigued by the fact that Taehyung thinks you don’t know that much about him.

“Okay, you’re on.”

He presses play on the boom box again and you try hard to listen to what he is telling you. He asks you five questions. You answer two with what he deems to be a satisfactory answer.

"Okay hit me.” He says.

You think about it for a moment. There are very few things you can think of to ask him. You don’t know what you don’t know after all. You think really hard, but the only thing that comes to mind is prom and you are fairly certain you know what happened there... still it’s a starting point.

“Where were you at the end of prom when your award was announced?”

His eyes widen as if he never thought you’d ask about something so long ago. You were curious though, you had seen him flirting with his date and then they both disappeared, except she came back, but he never did. When his date reappeared she looked a bit dishevelled and people just assumed Taehyung and her had made it somewhere in the school. But that didn’t explain why he never came back if she did.

“You don’t know? I thought my date told the entire school all about that...” He seems genuinely surprised.

You shake your head.

“We had been dating for a couple of months, and we were getting off after prom... I told her some... things... I would like to try in bed and she slapped me and walked away. Decided not to return with the red handprint etched on my face.”

“She hit you?”

This time he shrugged.

“I guess she really wasn’t into what I was in to.”

“What were you in to?” You ask, hanging off the bed, intrigued.

“Nope, that’s question number three, a question you have yet to earn.”

You grumble a little but then let him continue with his lesson. This time you pay better attention, earning yourself three out of five questions.

“So... what were you in to?”

“Wow, don’t even want to start with a filler question? Lead up to that one? No... Okay. Back then I wasn’t into anything that weird I liked to spank my partners, maybe fuck their mouths a little bit. Nothing huge.”

“That seems like a lot for an eighteen-year-old.” You point out but he just shrugs.

“I was a bad judge of what was normal, a lot of weird shit went down at that drama summer camp I did."

“So I take it that wasn’t your first time then?”

“No, no it was not.” He nods.

“But it was hers?”

“Yes, yes it was.” He confirms again.

You open your mouth to ask another question but he holds a hand up to silence you and presses play again. He allows you bonus points on these questions. Racking your total up to six. You really think about it, determined not to waste these questions like you did the last two.

“You said those things in past tense like you aren’t in to them any more. Did you move on to more normal sex or weirder kinks?”

“Well, that really depends on what you think of as weird.”

His answer avoids the question, and he knows it. You’ve wasted another question and he wants you to be more specific.

“What are your kinks Taehyung?” You ask point blank.

“I’m not sure you’re ready for that answer.” He counters.

“That didn’t answer my question.” You pout.

“It did, it just wasn’t the answer you were looking for.” He smiles like he has won the game.

You just pout back, no longer interested in playing his question game if that's how he wants to play.

“Fine, fine. Answer a question for me, that's not about the course material and I will answer your question properly.”

“Promise?”

“I promise... and that counts as a question. You are down to three... Well three and a half I guess.”

“Just ask your question.” You grumble.

“Do you have any kinks?” You search for the joke in his eyes, but all mirth has disappeared as he waits for your answer.

“I... I don’t know.”

“How can you not know?” He asks, shocked.

“You said I had to answer one question and I did. Your turn.”

You stick your tongue out as you beat him at his own game.

“Fine... I have a lot of kinks. Some of my favourites? Praise, spitting, oh and breath control... Can you tell me how you don’t know now?”

“I’ve never really looked into it my last boyfriend was very interested in only carrying out the missionary position and I guess I wasn’t really invested enough to look into other things. The sex was fine, I just thought that’s what sex is supposed to be.”

“Tell me you’re joking...”

“I’m not.”

"Well, that's exceedingly depressing to hear Y/N-ah" His eyes fill with pity.

He finally moves from the desk, sliding on the bed next to you and taking your hands.

You glance down at where he is rubbing his thumbs over your knuckles. Everything suddenly feels a little too hot. You've not even been into detail about your lack of a sex life with your closest friends. 

"Maybe we should get back to studying." You say trying to change the topic.

You tug at your hands but Taehyung doesn't release them.

"I can help you with this too... if you want." He says.

You expect him to laugh, to pull away, to show some sign that he is joking. But it never comes. 

"You can't be serious. you aren't serious... Are you?"

"I've never been more serious in my life. And you have two questions left."

But he doesn't let you ask another one.

His lips are pressed up against yours, his hand relinquishing your own in favour of winding around your waist. He pushes against you forcing you to lie back on the bed. His tongue flicks against your lips and you allow him past. He explores a little before growing impatient and starting to kiss along your chin and down your throat.

His teeth graze along the column of your throat and his tongue dips into any crevices it finds.

"Taehyung.. shouldn't we talk about this?" 

"We will talk about this. In a minute." mumbles against your skin.

He pulls at the collar of your T-shirt to allow himself better access to your skin. He sucks a trail of purpling hickies from your collarbone to your shoulder. He makes a point of biting harder as he reaches the end, leaving you with a distinctive imprint of his teeth. 

"Are you going to be a good girl and let me show you how good sex can actually feel?" He makes firm eye contact as he waits for your answer.

The way his personality switches makes you shiver, the little praise making your legs twitch together.

"And how are you going to show me?" 

Instead of coming out strong and rebellious like you had hoped, your voice is breathy as if he had literally taken the air from your lungs. You grimace at your attempt making him chuckle. He reaches up to push your hair out of your face, leaving his palm on your cheek.

"I am going to take care of you in a way that's going to have you feeling like a princess while treating you like a whore."

He kisses you again with bruising force, teeth nibbling along your bottom lip. His hand slides from your face to the base of your throat, applying just a little pressure.

"Is this okay?" He asks.

You nod causing his hand to tighten slightly, and again your body tingles under his touch.

"Great, my hand is going to keep getting tighter. It will always be safe but if you want to stop you need to tap on my body three times. You can tap anywhere just do it firmly. Can you do that for me?"

Again you nod.

"Prove it to me, show me you can follow instructions."

You roll your eyes and he taps his hand against your chest as a small punishment. So you oblige, tapping his bicep hard three times in quick succession.

"That's perfect, angel." He squeezes tightly and then removes his hand completely.

He sits up and drags you with him so he can remove your shirt, he discards his own in the process. He kisses you once more and then slips off the bed and onto the floor. You lift your hips as he tugs at your sweats, taking your panties with them. 

He licks stripes along each of your thighs stopping an inch shy of your centre.

"Put your hands on my shoulders and squeeze when I do something you like. Don't be afraid to dig your nails in, I like it when it hurts." He winks.

And then his head disappears between your thighs.

His tongue delves deep into your folds, lapping at your hole until it's dripping. Only then does he shuffle his attention up to your clit. In the meantime, your nails bore into his shoulders leaving painful little half-moons behind to match the teeth marks on your own.

The tip of his tongue digs into the centre of your clit, he wiggles it back and forth making your toes curl into his rug. A finger soon joins his endeavour, pushing deep inside before forming come hither motions that turn you to jelly. Still, you keep your hands firmly planted on his shoulders like he said.

"You taste so good, always knew you would." He mumbles into your pussy.

The deep timber of his voice vibrates through you. Tipping you over the edge. Your head falls back and your mouth opens, whines spilling free as he continues to pleasure you through your orgasm.

He eventually pulls away as tears start to form in your eyes. He grabs a condom from his bedside table, shimmying quickly out of his slacks so he can roll the latex on. You lay back onto the bed properly as you wait for him. 

When he is ready, he slips in between your legs lining his hips up to yours. He uses one arm to balance leaning on his elbow next to your head as his free hand finds its way back to your throat, squeezing just tight enough to make you gasp.

"Do you remember what I said?" He questions.

You tap his arm three times and he releases your throat.

"That's my good girl, I knew I could get you to learn with the right incentive." He practically purrs. "I'm going to put my hand back now. The further into you I slide my dick, the tighter my hand is going to get okay?"

"Okay." You agree.

He leans in to kiss you, pushing his tongue past your lips as he rubs his hard length along your sensitive folds. The tip nudges against your clit make you cringe from the oversensitivity that still lingered. And then without much warning, he begins to slide in, his hand tightening in unison as promised. 

Your head starts to swim as he bottoms out. But the feeling doesn't scare you like maybe it should. You trust Taehyung. The pressure releases as he pulls back, his hand squeezes in time with each thrust, giving you just enough time to draw breath before he cuts you off each time.

"Your pussy squeezes so deliciously whenever I do this." He emphasises by pressing tighter on your windpipe.

You manage a strangled moan in response and his hand pulls away. You whimper at the loss but he just chuckles.

"I want to hear you now angel, we can have more fun with breath control another day." 

With both hands available to keep his balance, he thrusts harder, going deeper with each motion. He moans in your ear as he leans in closer letting you know exactly how you're making him feel. As his pace becomes more erratic he becomes more vocal.

"You make me so hard baby." He cries, hips stuttering a little. "You're so wet. Touch yourself for me."

You do as you're told, sliding a hand in between the two of you. He siver as your knuckles brush against his happy trail. You draw sloppy figures of eights around your clit, struggling to keep a steady motion as Taehyung whines, nearing his own end. 

You clamp down around him as you tip into a second orgasm, taking him over the edge with you. He rolls over to avoid putting his weight and brings you into his arms instead.

"I've waited forever for this." He sighs, kissing the top of your head.

"No, you have not." You shake your head, assuming it's just another of his exaggerations.

"Yes, I have. It's always been you... I really thought I had missed my chance a long time ago." He confessed.

You sit with the new information for a while. Taehyung seems completely content to sit there holding you, not really caring for a response but you give one anyway.

"I always thought you'd be my first you know... back when we were 14 just before we drifted apart..." You whisper, more into the air at him.

"I was just starting to give up on my crush around then.." His chuckle is humourless.

"I think this has worked out better. We've had time to become our own people." You muse.

"Yeah, maybe you're right. But now that I've had you, I have no intention of letting you go again."

He pulls you tighter into his embrace and you return the affection wrapping your ars around him too.

Notes:

This request asked for a spit kink but sadly I couldn't quite fit it in with the theme. Also, they asked for a shy Tae and apparently my brain says no, no shy Taes... Sorry

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