#CREDIT WHERE CREDIT'S DUE! i can comprehend how he's been doing alright thus far

[jojossillywalk]

this guy has been running around europe by himself with nothing but a gym bag for 3 entire years :) methinks that he is structurally a man and functionally an unrelenting species of weed.

[sithlordintraining]

Occasionally Even the Deceiver is Deceived, Honey

A/N: Hi, so this part is literally a filler. I really do like this little series and wish more people would like it. I know a reader hasn’t been mainly in the past few, but I just had to introduce the whole relationship. Hopefully, you guys catch on to the flow because the next one would be more Ben Solo x Reader involved. This (and the last two) is just a filler. Also, @lilacs-lavender , I hope you enjoy. The next one will be WAYYYY better.

Previous: The Search for the Phantom Menace, Honey

Narrator: A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away; Ben Solo: he's a dandy guy in space. He combs the galaxy like his hair on the hunt for aliens and any other things that people need smuggling. Planet after planet he searches, discovering bizarre relics and new creatures, both friendly and not. These are the spectacular adventures of Ben Solo and his brave space crew in space.

“Urgh, I’m hungry!” Maumau leaned over Ben’s lap. “Don’t you have any more food?”

Clenching his eyes shut, Ben let out a huff “Well, we did have enough rations for double the people, but SOME PEOPLE DON’T KNOW PORTION CONTROL!” Ben shoved the cat off his leg.

“Hey! Don’t blame me because I’m a growing cat!” He rubbed his hip as Ben rolled his eyes.

“What about the lifetime supply of space cereal you and Chewie won?” C3-PO chipped in. Maumau’s face lit up as he ran to find the new found treasure. Ripping the box open, he shoves the sugary substance into his mouth. Ben grabbed a box that slid near his foot in Maumau’s pursuit.

(Ben observing the cereal written in an Alien Language)

“Huh, now I remember why we didn’t eat this. I have no idea what it says.” He threw it over his shoulder, which coincidentally landed on C3-PO’s lap.

“Oh! Master Solo these are the same makers of that cereal you used to eat all of the time when you were you little.”

“GalactaBits?!” Ben jumped to his feet to sing the jingle “GALAAAAAACTABITSSSSS! IT’S A GALAXY IN YOUR MOOOOOUTH! GALAAAAAACTABITSSSSS! FEEL THE STARS EXPLODE AND PLANETS FORM! GALAAAAAACTABITSSSSS!” Ben horribly moonwalked his way over to a box, tearing it open.

“Master Solo, did you know that each box of cereal is manufactured on the original planet of the owner, which is only 50,000 light years away!” C3-PO was amazed at all the fun facts this little box held.

“50,000 LIGHT YEARS!” Ben screeched, throwing down the expired cereal.

“Oh calm down, it’s just the sell by date.” Maumau continued eating the box.

“You know what! Fine, then you eat it!” Ben kicked the box over to him and Maumau happily accepted it.

Ben slid back into the pilot seat. “Urgh, I wish I would’ve just handed you in and I’d have enough money to go to BooBies.”

Freezing, Ben began to pat himself down, until he felt a card in the inside pocket of his vest. Pulling it out and holding it high to the sky, he exclaimed: “BEHOLD!” It was a holocard with the girls from Boobies dancing around. One very busty girl stepped forward and said very sensually:‘You’ve filled up your point card. Your next visit is on us.’

Kissing the card, Ben spoke, “Even if we have no money, we can still enjoy BooBies with this.”

“You have a BooBies point card?” Maumau asked.

“This is the fruit of my sweat and blood,” Ben held it closely “going to BooBies, rain or shine. . .”

“So it’s not smuggling? Because if so, I can tell this go on the phone, we are out of business.” Maumau quirked up. Ben quickly rushed over to answer, desperately.

“But the card is only good for today.” Threepio chimed. “And there are only two hours and thirty minutes left in the day.”

Ben’s jaw dropped as he stopped talking to, hopefully, his new temporary employer. “What?! Where’s the nearest BooBies?! We must find it fast!” rushing over to the pilot seat, but a clear of the throat made him stop. He turned around and the pale man scrunches his face.

“If I would’ve known you were incompetent, I would’ve contacted someone else.”

Ben scrunched his face. He never met someone in the smuggling business that was smart enough to be competent or even know what it meant.

“Yeah, sorry. Go on with what you were saying . . .” Ben waited for the man. The man started to sweat like he couldn’t remember his name. “Rob Schmobb.”

Ben held back a laugh “Well. . . Mr. Schmobb, I swear to you under the oath of BooBies,” He snatched the holocard out of C3-Po’s hand. “we will have it to you in under two hours and thirty minutes, or I’m not: Ben Solo, great smuggler like his father before him, bad boy royal, and this month’s centerfold in ‘COSMOtion’ magazine!”

Narrator: As Ben inputs, the location of his new smuggling deal, aboard the First Order’s ship, General Hux and Captain Phasma discuss their various plans that will initiate once they capture Ben Solo and the galaxy is finally in the First Order’s hands. Maybe, finally get some sun, a few flings, or maybe just sleep. General Hux enlisted one of the top lieutenants to enact this plan. The General was tired of his whole career (life) relying on capturing some manchild. Standing on the bridge, the two wait for the latest news.

“I literally can’t take it, every time I hear his name, I just get a big headache.” Hux closed his eyes and let out a breath.

“General, I just finished contacting with Ben Solo!” Mitaka exclaimed in his civilian clothes. A small groan escaped Hux’s mouth. “There it goes.” Earning a chuckle from Phasma.

“Go ahead Lieutenant Mitaka, I’m listening.”

“The plan was perfect! He didn’t care what job, they had no money and was basically relying on a BooBies point card to eat!” Mitaka rambled.

“Mitaka!” Hux raised his hand. “So what planet are we going to for the pickup?”

“Kabama Xyl.”

If looks could kill, the Lieutenant would’ve been dead. Hux was speechless. Phasma could feel the anger rise from her comrade and decided to speak. “Kabama Xyl? Lieutenant, you do know that there is a very dangerous creature that lives there right?”

“Correct, Captain. That was the bait I used to get him there.”

“And you do know once on that planet there is no escaping?”

“Correct, Captain.”

“You do know that we would be unable to land our ships and retrieve Solo, correct?”

“Corr—” Mitaka didn’t even think fully about his plan. Being so enraptured on getting credit for successfully helping bring the First Order to capture THE Ben Solo and taking over the galaxy.

“You’re dismissed.” Hux looked at him for the first time.

Walking away, Mitaka slowly pictured his lifeless body floating into space.

“We work with kriffing incompetent dumbasses.” Phasma chuckled.

Narrator: Kabama Xyl. One of the most dangerous places in the Lotho Minor system. Extremely dangerous for a dwarf planet. It was also held to one of the deadliest creatures. No one has been ever to capture it and make it alive to give it a name, but it’s most definitely a shapeshifter. How do I know? Well, I’m just your omniscient narrator that knows everything obviously. Ok, so her name (yes her) is Mamita. She shapes into anything that will get you to trust her so she could eat you. And in approximately 7...5 seconds, Ben Solo and his crew will land on this planet to meet their fate.

“Urgh, it’s so dusty!” Maumau coughed as the ramp slammed down.

Ben walked out on the desolate planet. “This junkyard is worse than Lotho Minor!”

“Well, Master Solo, I say if we hurry up we can be off this planet.”

“How much time?” Ben asked. BooBies ran through his mind

“One hour and forty-seven minutes,” C3-PO responded.

Ben groaned, he wished there was more time.

Narrator: He actually wanted to go to the Boobies that Baby was working at. Baby. If that is her real name, had Playboy Ben wrapped around her finger. There was something about her that captured little Ben’s soul. He thought about you at different parts of his day. But definitely all through the night. But, I don’t think it was to be thinking of someone when there’s a shapeshifter amongst them.

“Help!” They all turned their head in the direction of the scream. From what they could make out it was a young woman. She seemed small due to distance, but they could tell she had (y/s/c) skin and (y/h/c) color. You were running pretty fast. Maumau was pretty impressed because he couldn’t even do that speed on all four. As you grew closer, Ben began to recognize the familiar face.

“Baby?” Ben mouthed.

Before the others could comprehend, Ben was sprinting towards the girl. Following behind him, they also made out the creature that was following the girl. It was huge. Almost like a Rancor, but with fur. The creature raised his fist and went to smash you, Ben pushed out the way causing you two to roll down the sandy hill.

“Baby what are you doing here?” He asked catching his breath.

“What are you doing here?” you replied.

“I have work.” He waited for you to say yours.

“My ship broke down and then that monster came and I started to run. And then you showed up.” You said ever so sweetly, a blush instantly formed on his face.

Clearing his throat he spoke, “Well you’re safe, we got you.”

He pulled you and you slowly made your way back to the group who was cowering behind a boulder.

“Master Solo! I’m glad to see you in one piece and Miss Baby.” C3-PO exclaimed.

You smiled and looked at Maumau “And who is this?”

Maumau straightened up. “Maumau.” He clumsily spoke. He couldn’t help but fall under your spell.

Narrator: Literally.

“Are you cat?” you gently petted his head. “I’ve never had a cat before.”

“No-” “Yes!” Maumau jumped to cover Ben’s mouth. He wasn’t going to ruin a chance with a beautiful girl like you.

“Well, I can be your first.” Maumau kissed her hand as Ben dry heaved.

You giggled “You’re cute!”

Why, in any universe, would anyone think this filthy creature was cute!’ Ben thought.

“Alright, let’s all get back to the ship.” Ben pushed passed Maumau.

Narrator: And thus began, Ben being the third wheel to you and Maumau’s constant flirting. Of course, there was C3-PO to keep Ben company. But, one can only take so much of an educational conversation. He became brooding and started to sulk at you practically drooling over Maumau. If Ben really knew that Baby was really a Mamita and was preparing to eat him. But, now that the group has made their way back to the Falcon and are preparing to leave this dreadful planet. Unknown to Ben and his golden red-armed friend, Maumau is being prepared to be quite a delicious meal.

“Okay, so I have what Rob Schmobb wants, where is he?” Ben huffed.

“Hopefully soon, Master Solo,” C3-PO spoke up.

“How much time we do have left?” Ben pulled out the BooBies holocard and watched the girls dance.

“We have about forty-eight minutes, sir.”

“Urgh, I hate this. And I hate that Baby has been all over Maumau. Stupid cat. Why do women love those ugly things.” Ben sulked in his pilot seat, thinking about all the chances he SHOULD’VE had with her instead of him.

“Kriff it! We are leaving! I’m hungry! Where’s Maumau and Baby?” Ben said standing up.

“I don’t know sir, If I remember correctly, He was showing her how to play Dejarik.”

Ben stomped his way to the communal space. It was eerily dark as if the light blew out. He did not need this ship falling part while there were less than forty-five minutes left to go to BooBies. Ben’s long limb extended to the light overhead and banged it until it comes on. But, he wasn’t prepared to see a disfigured Baby with tentacles wrapped around Maumau.

“Baby?!” Ben gasped. “What did you do to her you stupid cat?!”

“Me?!” A struggling Maumau screeched. “One minute she was kissing all over me and now she’s trying to eat me! HELP!”

A dramatic Ben clutched his heart as he cried out ‘Baby’.

“Ben! Kill it!” Maumau yelled.

“But it’s Baby.”

“Ben, it’s a monster! Kill it.”

Ben pulled out his blaster and shot everywhere but at the monster. From all the noise, C3-PO went to inspect what was going on.

“Master Solo! We have thirty-nine minutes left,” he said as a wailing Ben, gagging Maumau and a screeching monster all responded. “Master Solo, what is going on?”

“I can’t shoot her! She’s so beautiful.” Ben cried out.

Escaping the monster’s tentacles Maumau yelled out “She’s not real! The faster you kill this thing the faster you go to BooBies and see the real Baby.”

“Master Solo, it appears to me we have come in contact with a shapeshifting alien.”

With teary eyes, Ben aimed his blaster at the disfigured Baby. If it wasn’t for C3-PO being frightened by the tentacle inching toward him, he would’ve never made the shot. Green goo splashed everywhere. A silence fell out at the realization of what just happened.

Narrator: Of course, the star of our story is extremely dramatic. After killing who he believed was his ‘Baby’, he immediately blacked out. You would think that if you saw the girl you liked covered in tentacles and drool and trying to kill one of your friends, you would definitely kill it. If it was for Threepio, I’m pretty sure none would’ve survived, except Threepio. Once he awakened, he silently (sulking) used the last 15 minutes to jump into hyperspace to the one place that could cheer him up: BooBies.

“Run you two! We have less than fifty seconds before the card expires.” Ben ran to the entrance but instantly ran into the back of a rather tall, gray Chev. The man turned around and peered at the young man with a grimacing face.

“Hey, man, look I’m-” The Chev grabbed Ben by his vest and spun him around.

‘WINNER!’

An anautomatic generic voice rang out as balloons fell down.

“Ben! You’re our one millionth customer!” Ben whipped his head at the sound of your voice. It was you! It was the real you. Sliding out of his vest, that was still held by the Chev, Ben ran over instantly crushing you into his chest.

“Oh makers, it’s you! It’s really you!”

“Yeah, it is.” You wiggled out of his grip. “And you and your friends just won a free all you can eat meal!”

“ALL YOU CAN EAT!” Maumau popped up. “Where’s the menus, Baby?”

“I’ll be right back, take a seat.”

Ben kicked the cat.

“Hey! What was that for?” Maumau rubbed his arm.

“For interrupting a very necessary moment. I just killed her and now she’s here!”

“Actually, Master Solo, it was an alien you killed.”

Ben rolled his eyes and set his gaze on you. He watched as you sauntered your way through the restaurant. He didn’t know what it was (the force) but he felt a pull (the force) to you. There was something about your smile and your laugh and your voice and your (h/c) hair that was as shiny as his. ‘Our kids would have a great head of hair.’ he chuckled to himself.

“Why don’t you ask her out?” A growled came from Maumau’s stomach, causing Ben to leave his thoughts.

“What?” Ben turned to the cat.

“Ask Baby out. There is no denying that you LOVE her.”

“I don’t love her.” Ben scowled.

“Ok yeah, you didn’t want to kill an alien that looked like just like her that was going to eat us.”

“Eat you.” Ben pointed out. “I was perfectly fine with her doing so.”  he crossed his arms.

“Doing what?” your angelic voice rang out.

“Asking you on a date.” C3-PO answered.

“Threepio!” Ben said through his teeth.

“Me?” you asked very softly.

Ben ran his large fingers through his hair. “Um, if you would like, I would like, if you don’t mind, because I don’t mind-” he rambled.

“Yes, I don’t mind, if you don’t mind.” you smiled

“No!” Ben jumped “I don’t mind.”

“Ok, good. You can pick me up here tomorrow at 21:00.” you smiled.

“Ok, Baby.” A blush crept up Ben’s face.

“Y/N.”

“What?!”

“My real name is “Y/N.”

‘Y/N’ he sang through his head.

To be continued...

P.S: I really do hope you like it. I would want to make a date part for next part and establish the relationship.