#But it's alright Odessa is here to fix him

[cloned-eyes]

Scene out of @therisingdarkness story of our babies. Ghoul is such a dick, i love him

[josephandrewstarkey]

drew being jealous ab actor!reader in a movie but what about him in hellraiser and that see scene with Odessa 👀

tysm anon for your req, hope you enjoy this!! x

jealous desires

warnings: fingering, dirty talk, reader giving blowjob, cussing, jealous drew 🥰

disclaimer: you can imagine any actor but i used Jacob Elordi idk why 😭 + these pics of him omggggg

pairing: Drew Starkey x actress!reader

Y/N had been waiting for this moment, knowing Drew had watched her latest movie. It was her first big romantic role, and she’d shared most of her scenes with Jacob Elordi. She felt a mix of pride and nerves about the movie, but more than anything, she was dying to know what Drew thought of it. He was her best friend, and his opinion mattered the most to her.

“So…” she started, sitting beside him on the couch, trying to read his expression. “What did you think of the movie?”

Drew didn’t look at her right away. His eyes were fixed on the TV, even though it wasn’t on. “It was fine,” he said flatly.

Y/N frowned, tilting her head to study his face. “Just fine?” she teased, nudging him with her elbow. “Come on, Drew. You’re usually more excited after watching something I’m in.”

He shrugged, still avoiding eye contact. “I don’t know, Y/N. It was… good i guess

She smirked, already sensing what was going on. “Oh, I get it.” She leaned closer, her voice dropping playfully. “Didn’t like seeing me all over Jacob, did you?”

Drew’s jaw tightened, and he finally turned to look at her, his blue eyes dark. “Maybe I didn’t like it. You looked way too into it.”

Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at the way he was acting. “Drew, it’s just a movie.”

“Doesn’t mean I have to enjoy watching you kiss another guy,” he muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

She grinned, moving closer so her knee brushed against his leg. “Wait a second… are you jealous?” she asked, her tone teasing.

He didn’t respond at first, his eyes flickering away from hers as if he didn’t want to admit it. But Y/N could see it written all over his face.

“Drew…” she sang softly, dragging out his name. “You totally are. You’re jealous of Jacob!”

Drew let out a frustrated sigh, his hand raking through his hair. “Alright, fine! Yeah, I didn’t like it, okay? I didn’t like seeing him touch you, seeing you look at him like that. It drove me insane.”

Y/N’s eyes softened at his confession, but she couldn’t resist teasing him a bit more. “Wow, I had no idea. I thought you were all cool and calm, but here you are, getting all worked up over a few movie scenes.”

He shot her a look. “You’d be the same if the roles were reversed.”

Y/N raised an eyebrow, a sly smile tugging at her lips. “Oh, you think I wouldn’t? You think I didn’t feel the same way when I watched Hellraiser?”

Now it was Drew’s turn to look confused. “What are you talking about?”

She shrugged, pretending to be nonchalant. “You know, you and Odessa. Those close scenes. All that… tension between you two.”

Drew blinked, clearly caught off guard. “Wait, you were jealous of Hellraiser?”

Y/N nodded, biting her lip as she confessed. “Yeah. Watching you with her… it wasn’t easy. But I didn’t say anything because, well, it’s acting, right? I knew you were just doing your job.”

Drew’s expression softened, and for a moment, the two of them just stared at each other, both realizing they’d been feeling the same thing but never saying it out loud.

“You know, we’re pretty stupid,” Drew said, chuckling softly. “Both of us getting jealous over fake scenes.”

“Yeah, but I guess it means we care,” Y/N replied, her voice quieter now. She leaned closer, her hand resting on his thigh. “We care a lot, don’t we?”

Drew’s breath hitched as she inched even closer, their faces just inches apart now. His hand found her waist, pulling her gently onto his lap. “Maybe we care a little too much,” he whispered, his voice husky.

Before either of them could think twice, their lips collided in a heated kiss. It wasn’t soft or tentative like the first kisses you see in movies—it was full of pent-up desire and unspoken feelings. Drew’s hands gripped her hips, pulling her tighter against him as she straddled his lap.

Y/N moaned softly against his mouth, her hands tangling in his hair as she kissed him back with equal intensity. She could feel his need for her in the way his hands roamed her body, fingers digging into her skin like he couldn’t get enough.

When his hands slid under her shirt, tracing the bare skin of her stomach, Y/N gasped softly, pulling away from the kiss to catch her breath. “Drew…” she murmured, her eyes dark with want.

He didn’t waste any time. His hand slipped between her legs, fingers teasing the fabric of her panties before slipping underneath. Y/N let out a soft whimper as his fingers found her, moving slowly at first, then picking up speed as he watched her fall apart in his lap.

“You like that, huh?” he whispered against her ear, his voice low and rough. “You like when I touch you like this?”

Y/N could only nod, biting her lip to keep from moaning too loudly. Her hips moved in rhythm with his hand, her whole body trembling with the pleasure he was giving her.

Just when she thought she couldn’t take anymore, Drew’s hand stopped, pulling away from her. She opened her eyes to see him smirking at her, and she knew what he wanted.

Without saying a word, she slid off his lap and dropped to her knees in front of him, her hands already working on the button of his jeans. Drew groaned as she freed him, his head falling back against the couch as she took him in her mouth.

Y/N took her time, teasing him the way she knew would drive him crazy. Her hands moved up and down his length as she swirled her tongue around him, loving the way he groaned her name, his hands gripping the cushions beside him.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he breathed, his voice strained with pleasure. “You’re so good at that.”

She hummed in response, taking him deeper, her lips and tongue working him closer to the edge. Drew’s hips bucked involuntarily, and before long, he was moaning her name as he reached his release.

When it was over, Y/N sat back on her heels, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand as she looked up at him. Drew was breathless, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he tried to recover.

“Well, that was one way to handle our jealousy,” Y/N said with a grin, crawling back into his lap and wrapping her arms around his neck.

Drew chuckled, pulling her close and kissing her forehead. “Yeah… I’d say we’re even now.”

feel free to send in requests <33

[thehappiestgolucky]

Never really decide to fill out oc forms and stuff but ig that's because I've not been as oc involved in other fandoms before so yknow fuck it - VERY long post about the two DD crews of mine from D:A and 2 (and ending odessa even if shes not an arisen) | template here by @arisenreborn

DARK ARISEN

♛ THE ARISEN:

NAME: Odessa AGE: 12 RACE: Human PRONOUNS: She/Her PREFERRED VOCATION: Assassin FAVORED GIFTS: Foreign Knives FAMILY: Cassardis Villagers, Agira

POSITIVE TRAITS: Outgoing, Caring, Encouraging, Determined NEGATIVE TRAITS: Stubborn, Standoffish, Self Sacrificial, Single Track Minded LIKES: Community, Weaponry, Griffons, ironically Grigori DISLIKES: Feste, Nobility, Phantoms and their ilk, the Cycle

1. What was their life like before becoming Arisen? Being only 12, she didn't get to live much of a life before becoming Arisen. Her parents dying as she was still a newborn, Odessa was raised by the entire village instead and would always be helping her community with little tasks - like fixing up fishing nets or transferring crates to one place to another. She always wanted to grow up to be a guardian of the village.

2. How do they handle being Arisen, and the responsibilities that come with it?

At first she seemed to be handling it alright - but that's because there was this air of importance around the role like out of a fantasy hero story. But the longer the journey went on, when she defeated Grigori and had the world descend, uncovered Bitterblack Isle and more and more of the worlds ugliest truths became real to her she. Just kind of broke. She - as a kid who can only think in the moment and not long term concesquences - ended her time as Seneschal swiftly to break free of such a cruel cycle. Starting the crack that would devolve in DD2.

Upon practically disgarding her duties as Arisen and dying - Agira ended up alive on a beach and her will persisted thousands of years later to be reincarnated in DD2.

3. What are their thoughts on Pawns in general?

She viewed them as mysterious beings at first - obviously unfamiliar with them since this was the first time she met them. Rather quickly had she started seeing them as people, friends she could hang out with and always tried to instigate some kind of fun activity.

4. What's their relationship like with their main Pawn?

That's her dad! At first she saw him as more of a mentor figure but Odessa can and will make you a part of her family and she really started to look up to Agira as her father the more she was with him.

5. What are their opinions on the politics of the world in general?

Very single track mind of 'fuck capitalism why do rich people get everything'. The Duke she didn't care about at first but later came to dislike. Yknow especially when he tried to kill her because he thought this kid wanted his throne.

6. Who are their love interest(s) and/or closest friends?

Mercedes, Rennard, Selene and Quina really became her closest friends and family - but over the course of her journey she loses all but Selene. She only really bonds with Olra by the end because when she comes back from BBI - Odessa can't look at anyone the same. Like the light has went off in her heart.

7. What drew them to their preferred vocation? Do they have history with it?

Assasin, not because she has any history with it - but because she couldn't hold big swords right and masterful kill go brrrr.

8. Do they have any hobbies? Any way of relaxing between all that monster-slaying and traveling?

Odessa's hobbies are all very physical, hiking, running, playfighting - she lives and breathes energy and activity. But sometimes she does like to just stay with her dad and relax in his lap. Especially near the end.

♟︎ THE PAWN:

NAME: Agira | (Ending Timeskip) Agira Fisher AGE: Apparently 35 | (Ending Timeskip) Apparently 48 RACE: Human - yes even with the pointy ears PRONOUNS: He/Him PREFERRED VOCATION: Sorcerer FAVORED GIFTS: Fancy Items, Interesting Items, Grimiores INCLINATION: Straightforward

POSITIVE TRAITS: Caring, Considerate, Analytical, Mentoral Figure NEGATIVE TRAITS: Distant, Self Loathing, Standoffish, Cold LIKES: Family, Books, Coffee(but spiritually I dont think he'll ever get it in DD), Relics DISLIKES: Himself, Poor Leadership,

1. What was their life like prior to being summoned by their Arisen?

Vaguely Agira remembers that he failed his Arisen before being summoned by Odessa. Faintly he knows he loved that Arisen, maybe they even would've had a family as husband and wife - but time and not being bestowed a spirit has left only a giant scar on his back as a reminder of his failings and a sense of dread when this child summonded him.

2. What is their opinion on the Arisen? How do they view their relationship?

At first he tried to be distant, to not be attatched like he had managed when summoned to simply help Arisen before. But overtime he came to simply adore Odessa and dote on her like his daughter - to the point when she started calling her 'papa' he only responded with 'yes?'. He wanted nothing more than for this kid to live her best life after the mess was over.

(Ending Timeskip) Now thousands of years, and a whole new land built over the one he knew later, he still misses his daughter as she appeared the first time immensely. He got to have her again though - and be the father he always wanted to be with her. No longer tied to Arisen or Pawn.

3. Is there anything about the Arisen they find troublesome? Be it a small quirk or bad habit? (Or are they obviously flawless?)

Her self sacrificial habits. He was watching a kid leap into dangerous situations most kids would understandably run from and it was getting to concerning levels. Got much worse after BBI.

(Ending Timeskip) Yknow sometimes kids are exhausting! Lovingly of course.

4. What is their specialization and is there any story behind how they cultivated that skill set?

Forager. Originally he was going to be a Woodland Wordsmith - but arriving in Vermund for the first time from BBI he really wouldn't grasp a race's language after just learning they exist. As a forager - he knows materials and monsters well at this point and can pinpoint exactly what you need and where.

5. Do they have any thoughts on the politics of the world and their place in it as a Pawn - or how Pawns are treated?

In Gransys he always viewed the Duke's lack of action addressing the nobility taking advantage of the poor to be intolerable. In Vermund and Battahl he's pleased to know the two current leadership (Nadinia and Sven) are actually working to solve issues than leave them to fester.

He had no thoughts on how pawns were treated in Gransys. Most people simply hired them for swords and mostly left them to their business. He was rather... unpleasently surprised when he was met with some spiteful glares from time to time.

6. Does their journey with the Arisen change them in any significant way and how?

Yes. So much. Went from lost man to a depressed middle aged dad who is always trying to make up for sins only known to him. For the people of Gransys wiped from an Unmooring. For the lost souls of BBI. For his first daughter. For the future of his son and daughter.

7. Is there a reason they chose their preferred vocation?

Man's a noodle. He is NOT gonna weild a sword lmfao. He has quite the mastery over powerful spells and even becomes the Sorcerer Maister of Gicel and Fulimation. He's always had significant intunement with the lightning magicks and an interest in the arts.

8. Do they have any hobbies or preferred past-times?

Nerd. Reads books, grimiores and history, finances and culture whatever. He loves reading and since this man does NOT sleep he stays up reading to get his mind off things. Tries to play with his daughter but often just gets tired.

DD2

♛ THE ARISEN:

NAME: (Arisen) Odessa Carlisa | (Ending Timeskip) Odessa Fisher AGE: (Arisen) 26 | (Ending Timeskip) 12 RACE: Human PRONOUNS: She/Her PREFERRED VOCATION: (Arisen) Warfarer | (Ending Timeskip) Warrior FAVORED GIFTS: Interesting Items, Adorable Items FAMILY: (Arisen) Jinx and Steven Carlisa (Parents, Desceased), Fe'gahl | (Ending Timeskip) Agira Fisher (Father), Fe'gahl Fisher (Brother)

POSITIVE TRAITS: Outgoing, Supportive, Brave, Determined NEGATIVE TRAITS: Stubborn, Self Sacrificial, Hides Her Feelings (Arisen), Single Track Minded (Ending Timeskip) LIKES: Family, Community, Weaponry, Griffons, Dragons (Ending Timeskip) DISLIKES: Nobility, Pathfinder (Arisen), Poor Leadership (Arisen), Slimes (Ending Timeskip)

1. What was their life like before becoming Arisen?

(Arisen) Odessa was born in Harve Village, but lost her father pretty young and mother moving them both to Vernworth. There she was raised and eventually enlisted as a guard in Vernworth. Her mother unfortunately died after complications with a sickness she contracted after trying to aid the sick.

(Ending Timeskip) Arisen's don't exist in her world anymore. She was born a few years after the cycle was shattered by her previous incarnation but her parents were unknown and already gone by the time Agira found her. She's been raised by Agira ever since in his village (name pending) and wants to become the warrior of her village when she's all grown.

2. How do they handle being Arisen, and the responsibilities that come with it?

(Arisen) Well enough. She understands her responsibilities a lot better than her previous incarnation and uses the title as the biggest excuse to help as many people as she physically can. When the time came for her to finish the job she had started - she took it in stride and vowed to free the world like the poor child had tried to.

3. What are their thoughts on Pawns in general?

(Arisen) She cares deeply for them. Each and every one is someone she can see as a unique person and hopes that they all thrive in their world. The ones she hires are always treated with the utmost respect and responsibility - ready to die for them in need be.

(Ending Timeskip) Two make up her family! And her brother is friends with so many too! They're awesome!

4. What's their relationship like with their main Pawn?

(Arisen) At first she was really just a mentor to an almost lost puppy of a pawn but - as Odessa does - he became her family as her little brother and adores him to the ends of earth. To the point where a slight against him was akin to a death sentence (she didn't actually kill anyone. in her mind though-)

(Ending Timeskip) Again, no Arisen, she's not got a main pawn. BUT the two pawns that are her father and older brother she loves so so much. She knows they're from her previous lives - and well she doesn't fully know what that means, but she does know that means they were always destined to be together and that's what matters!

5. Do they have any interest in being Sovran? What are their opinions on the politics of the world in general?

(Arisen) Not in the slightest. She would only have been Sovran as a way to exert the changes she wants. She trusts Sven and Nadinia to guide both countries to a far more better future - especially when through her they are united in a goal.

6. Who are their love interest(s) and/or closest friends?

(Arisen) God a lot of the NPCS are her friends. No love interests. She somewhat nestled into Ulrika and Lennarts family and she trusts Sven, Nadinia, Mellana, Brant etc so much. She worked hard to build up those friendships and happily died to ensure their survival.

(Ending Timeskip) Its a lil awkward when a lot of the people knew her as a grown adult that fixed their problems, but she still likes hanging around with them. As such, any friends she has would be kids that came 14 years after the cycle breaking. She does look up to Mellana and Beren the most though they're so cool.

7. What drew them to their preferred vocation? Do they have history with it?

(Arisen) Has always been one to dabble in anything and everything and the vocation that allowed her to do that is mwah. Godsend. She's strong enough to weild a greatsword but adores the speed of daggers.

(Ending Timeskip) She's not Arisen so she can't be a Warfarer! Anway, she likes when big sword go bonk so.

8. Do they have any hobbies? Any way of relaxing between all that monster-slaying and traveling?

(Arisen) Sitting and sightseeing. She loves the world of hers so much she would sometimes sit the group down to just. Watch monsters do their thing.

(Ending Timeskip) Hovering whatever Fe'gahl and Agira are doing, or playing games like tag and stuff with the other village kids. Or getting lessons off Menalla and Beren.

♟︎ THE PAWN:

NAME: Fe'gahl | (Ending Timeskip) Fe'gahl Fisher AGE: Apparently 23 RACE: Beastren PRONOUNS: He/Him PREFERRED VOCATION: Mage FAVORED GIFTS: Fancy Items, Interesting Items INCLINATION: Calm

POSITIVE TRAITS: Considerate, Compassionate, Brave, Aggreeable NEGATIVE TRAITS: (Hiddenly) Reckless, Nitpicky, Self Sacrificial, Lil Set in his Ways LIKES: Forests, Oxen, Moonglow, Family DISLIKES: Mistreatment of others, Bandits, Poor Leadership, Gorechimeras

1. What was their life like prior to being summoned by their Arisen?

It's a blank slate to him. Wherever he got his scars from before Odessa he knows not - and not even years of being a pawn with memories and will and spirit does he recall what happened in his vague wanderings before Odessa. Maybe that's a blessing - who knows if he was mistreated or not.

2. What is their opinion on the Arisen? How do they view their relationship?

Very high, adores her more than anything in the world. At first she was just his Arisen - his first time having one - but then the feeling went from her being a mentor and guide to family. It was unfamiliar to him but being her little brother brought a joy he never wanted replaced.

(Ending Timeskip) To say he was devastated after his sisters sacrifice is an understatement. He's now got the roles reversed on him, but he's more than happy to be an older brother to Odessa. Be just as great as his sister was to him.

3. Is there anything about the Arisen they find troublesome? Be it a small quirk or bad habit? (Or are they obviously flawless?)

Sometimes she says the stupidest things and it makes him roll his eyes, he judges her heavily for her taste in women (the Sphinx? Odessa please). He gets more upset when they get closer to the Dragon Confrontation because he didn't like the he knew she was hiding something but he didn't know what.

(Ending Timeskip) He loves her dearly but sometimes. Sometimes kids are irratating. Especially when your little sister likes leaping off cliffs for fun-

4. What is their specialization and is there any story behind how they cultivated that skill set?

Logistian. He starts to like fiddling around with items and seeing if he can make something new with them. Less leading him to be a logistian and more it leading him to be more hands on with things.

5. Do they have any thoughts on the politics of the world and their place in it as a Pawn - or how Pawns are treated?

He always felt some shame walking around the world knowing how pawns are treated. It's hard not to feel bad when glares are at your direction for things out of your control. It made him dislike how the leadership refused to do anything on it for convenience sake.

(Ending Timeskip) He works very closely with Sven and Nadinia and the Elves and is pleased with the positive changes they've all been working on. He can only hope that the next generation of leaders will still listen to his advice to keep the positive changes going.

6. Does their journey with the Arisen change them in any significant way and how?

He goes from a very survival oriented pawn to a healer willing to get hurt if it meant the person he was protecting got away without injury. Fe'gahl grows a lot of confidence through Odessa and leaves a lot of his more following pawn nature behind to be more independant with his choices.

7. Is there a reason they chose their preferred vocation?

He's a healer at heart forever and always. Helping people is one of the things that fills him with the greatest sense of purpose and joy.

8. Do they have any hobbies or preferred past-times?

Monster and world watching with Odessa. It helped him come to silently observe and learn the world around him as an active participant than just a pawn.

(Ending Timeskip) Comes to like crafting and putting together things - often making weird lil knick knacks when he has the time even if they're not very good.

[concentratedbitterness]

The Plan

Odessa, Texas: February 2, 1963

He can hear the sounds of the rain pattering in torrents across the roof; a million percussive strikes upon the tin creating a soft cacophony.  Some part of him wishes he could find peace in it, but on a day like today it only seems like a harbinger of grief.  His mother’s voice is barely discernible over the noise, wafting through the paper thin walls of the old farmhouse as she sings the gospel refrain of ‘Lift Thine Eyes’ to herself.  Malcolm sits by the front window of the parlor, weary eyes fixed upon the distant figure of his brother as he hurries to corral the hogs back into the barn for the evening.

“D’ya’ need anything, MJ?” A soft voice asks from behind him, and Malcolm glances back over his shoulder to see Grace Hansen standing in the doorway, pretty as a picture.  A pale blue cardigan envelops her thin frame, her long blond hair plaited neatly down her back.  The girl-next-door dancing on the cusp of womanhood has been on Marshall’s arm since they were children, and as clear as Mal can reckon she’s the only thing in this world he’s ever seen his twin brother handle with care.

He shakes his head, pulling his eyes away from her and letting his gaze drop to the stack of paperwork and envelopes in his lap–letters from the bank, collections agencies, overdue medical bills–it’s enough to make him reconsider, not for the first time since his father died or his mother fell ill, that he should return the old warlock’s calls.  “Prayers.”    

“Alright,” Grace says with a quiet sigh, “There’s a casserole in the oven for you an’ Marshall.  I’ll be by after Church tomorrow.”

The floorboards creak as she turns to go, and he hears himself murmur, “–Wait.  Gracie, wait.”

“What is it, MJ?”

“I just.  Thank you…” he stammers, hastening to expound upon the sentiment when the words don’t seem sufficient, “...Y’know, for everything.  For helpin’ us take care of her.”    

“Don’t be silly.  It’s what any good Christian w–” 

“Yeah, well this town’s full of good Christians an’ you’re the only one shows up t’ sponge bathe a dyin’ woman outta’ the goodness of your heart, so I’m thankin’ you.”  Malcolm tries to swallow the resentment still lingering on his tongue, tempering it with kinder words, “You don’t know what it means t’ Marshall an’ me, Gracie.  Jesus Christ, I–”  

“Shouldn’t take the Lord’s name in vain, MJ,” She warns with an apologetic smile, padding over to lean down and gently press a kiss to Malcolm’s temple.  “Have faith that this is all part of God’s plan.  Everything happens for a reason.”

“Yeah…”  He hears himself say without conviction, and it isn’t until Mal feels the slight, reassuring squeeze of Grace’s hand on his shoulder that he realizes how bone tired and soul-weary he’s become over the course of these last two years.  “Gracie, I don’t think she’s gonna’ last the night.”

“Jesus calls us all home, sooner or later.  Your mama’s not scared t’ go.  Your daddy’s waitin’ for her in Heaven.”  

No, he isn’t, Malcolm thinks bitterly, but he bites his tongue before the thought can fall from his lips.  “It’s a blessin’ she won’t be here t’ see us lose the farm,” he admits instead.  

“You’re not gonna’ lose the farm…”

“Tell that t’ the bank,” he murmurs dryly, hands shifting to the clutter on his lap.  Idly he begins to set the stacks on the side table.  A few pieces of unopened mail fall to the floor, and before Mal can bend down to retrieve them Grace has already knelt to gather them up.  

“What’s this?” she asks, holding up a letter addressed to Malcolm J. Brockway with a very official looking seal on the envelope.  “United States Marine Corps?  MJ, what do they want with you?”

He knows, before he reaches out to grasp the paper between his fingers, but he does not answer right away.  “It’s, ah–”  The right opportunity to share the news hasn’t come yet, and it would seem he’s run out of time.  “I talked to a recruiter in town just after Christmas; y’know, took some aptitude tests an’ stuff.  I’ll be eighteen in a couple months, an’ I qualified for Officer candidate school...”

“Malcolm Brockway, you can’t!” Grace exclaims, surprise and disappointment written across her features.  “How could you?  Does Marshall even know?”

It isn’t as though he had expected it to go over well, but the vehemence of the chastisement hits hard and throws him immediately on the defensive.  “Don’t do that, don’t gimme’ that guilt trip.  There’s nothin’ here for me!  You don’t know what it’s been like.  I love my brother, but we don’t see eye t’ eye ‘bout a lotta’ things.  The future he wants, it’s not…” Malcolm shakes his head, his tone softening when he sees the moisture shining in Grace’s eyes, “He’s still got you.  The two of you can make a life together, an’ that’ll be enough for him.  It’s always been enough for him.”

“Will anything ever be enough for you?”

Her words sting.  “That ain’t fair, Gracie.”

“Ain’t it?” She asks, voice shaking, “Your mama’s on her deathbed an’ instead of holdin’ close t’ the only family you’ll have left, you’re already makin’ plans t’ run away.  Lord have mercy, MJ, what is wrong with you?”

He isn’t quick enough with a reply, and by the time he thinks he can muster an insincere sorry she’s already through the door and halfway across the muddy pasture, trotting through the rain in Marshall’s direction.

“There’s nothin’ wrong with you, baby.”

“Mama’?! Jesus, what are you doin’ outta’ bed?”  Malcolm is up in an instant, practically bounding across the parlor to scoop the emaciated frame of his mother into his arms before her body can collapse to the floor.  She feels like empty skin; weightless and unsubstantial.  It’s been months since she’s been able to sit up on her own, much less walk, and he can’t imagine how she’s managed to shamble all the way down the hall from her room.  

She smiles upward, face gaunt and sickly from the ongoing ravages of her cancer.  Her eyes are glazed and unfocused, seeming to stare at nothing and everything.  “You were the one he wanted.”  Her head tips to rest upon her son’s shoulder, and she whispers in his ear, “Angel’s comin’, MJ.”

“C’mon, mama’, you need t’ lie down.” Mal tells her, already en-route to the bedroom.  Her ramblings seldom make sense anymore, not with all the medication she’s on to make her more comfortable.  It isn’t until he’s tucking her gently back into bed that he thinks twice about what she said.  The mattress dips when Malcolm sits down on the edge, reaching over to cover his mother’s bony hand with his own.

“You need t’ go.”

“I’m not goin’ anywhere, mama’,” he murmurs reassuringly, giving her fingers a little squeeze, “I’m not leavin’ you, I promise.”

His mother smiles again.  “You will.”  The smile falls away, morphing slowly to eerie blankness.  “Angel’s comin’, MJ.  Don’t let them catch you.”  They are the last words Katherine Brockway ever speaks.

Three months later, Marshall Brockway and Grace Hansen are wed in a small ceremony at the church in town.  The bride sneaks away during the reception to find her new brother-in-law out in the cemetery, weeping over his mother’s grave.  “Have faith,” she tells him, “God has a plan for all of us.  You’ll find your path, MJ."

“Where?”

“You’re already walkin’ it.”   

That evening Malcolm boards the last train at Midland station and departs for Quantico.

[headcanonseverywhere]

The Nightshade Sisters Go To Chicago

Plot: Gwendolyn's aunts - Seraphina, Odessa, and Adissa - pay her a visit in Chicago for her birthday. Chaos ensues.

I missed writing these ladies, so here ya go!

Part 1/?

It was nearly six in the morning when the Nightshade sisters arrived in Chicago through one of Saventhia’s approved portals. They wanted to surprise Gwendolyn on her birthday with a visit, since they had never been to her house before, and to make her day extra special.

So, they went out in search of their niece’s home. It would’ve been a much shorter journey if they were allowed to ride their broomsticks, but unfortunately it was prohibited according to the United Realms, much to their displeasure.

At last, they arrived at Gwendolyn’s house, which was also the place of her business, Sweet Delights, a quite popular bakery among the supernatural community. Though finding it wasn’t an easy task for them, as it was towered between two tall buildings connected by several skyways.

“Such ugly buildings covering little Gwen’s bakery!” complained Seraphina, as they reached the bakery’s front door.

“They look like two popsicles!” laughed Adissa, childishly.

“Hush, now!” scolded Odessa, and peered through the glass door. “She’s already up and about.”

“Already?!” exclaimed Seraphina, who followed her sister’s line of sight. “Well, I hope she’s had her breakfast first!”

While the two sisters were remarking on Gwendolyn’s early waking hours, Adissa had wandered over the small flower bed underneath the window, and was admiring its array of flowers.

“Pretty!” she sang.

“Adissa, don’t stray too far,” warned Odessa from the front door. “This place is a maze, you’ll get lost easily!”

“That’s all we need,” grumbled Seraphina. “A scavenger hunt for her!”

“Oh pipe down, pipe down now!” said Odessa. “Get back here, Adissa! Is everyone ready?”

The two sisters nodded their heads as they gathered together, when suddenly they felt a looming presence behind them, followed by a deep, intimidating voice of a man. “Can I help you?”

The sisters screamed and instantly waved their hands, each of them casting a different spell on him, to which he staggered back and fell to the ground, holding his face in agony.

Gwendolyn - who had heard the commotion from the bakery - came rushing outside to find her aunts and the disgruntled man at her door. The sisters turned and, unsure of what to do, simply smiled up at their niece and gave her a feeble cheer.

“Happy birthday, Gwen!” they sang uneasily, while the man still groaned on the ground.

“What happened?!” cried Gwendolyn, and hurried over to the fallen man.

The three sisters looked at each other, feeling very guilty.

“Oh, we’re sorry, Gwen dear,” Odessa finally spoke. “We wanted to surprise you with a visit for your birthday, but this young man startled us, and we thought we were in danger.”

Gwendolyn helped the man up, who had removed his hands by then, revealing a severely swollen face riddled with boils and warts, as well as a few feathers and scales protruding from his skin, as though they had always been there.

“Are you okay, Ajij?” Gwendolyn asked the man, to which he shook his head with much strain.

“We can fix up an antidote!” said Odessa, and they all helped him inside.

~~

“So, he works here?” said Seraphina, after Gwendolyn had explained to her aunts why Ajij arrived at the bakery in the first place, all while caring for him after giving the antidote.

“Oh, we’re terribly sorry.” Odessa apologized to him.

“No hard feelings.” he whispered in pain.

“You can take the day off to fully recover.” Gwendolyn told him.

“But who will help around the bakery?” he asked.

“We can!” piped Odessa, and the other sisters nodded in agreement. Gwendolyn began to protest, but Odessa insisted that they should.

“It’s the least we can do after what happened earlier.” she added.

Gwendolyn sighed in defeat. “Alright, we should go ahead and start opening then.”

And with that, the sisters hurried downstairs to the bakery, eager to help their niece’s business. As Gwendolyn followed her aunts’ lead, she felt Gumdrop scamper up her leg and nestle around her shoulders, squeaking at her very annoyed, to which she laughed at her familiar’s reaction.

“Don’t be like that, Gummie,” she said. “They’ll be just fine!”

At that moment, she heard a loud clutter of pans followed by an uproar of bickering and complaining from her aunts, and Gwendolyn let out a long sigh.

[mxtantrights]

˚ · · . · ✵ ✷ ✹ PART TWENTY

HAWKINS, INDIANA

OCTOBER 31, 1984

Jonathan Byers going to a party? Filled with other kids from this school? Unheard of! Unimaginable! Well, unless Nancy was there. I still don't get how this thing works between him and Nancy and Steve but then again

here we are.

With my notebook for math in my hands I shut my locker.

He's standing by my side, his bag over his shoulder. And he's got this look on his face. Like he wants me to talk him out of it. Or come with him. And I'm about to do neither so he better suck it up.

"Jon, I'm actually really proud of you for going to the party."

He starts stuttering as I take off down the hall. He's hot on my trail, a hand on my shoulder to slow me down. "I never said I was going."

"Oh but I think you are." I looked over to him with a knowing smile.

"What about you?"

Million dollar question.

We keep walking until we reach the end of the hall and stop near a wall. His class was down one way while mine was down the other. Ever since the second half of junior year started we've been meeting here whenever we can in between classes.

"I think I'm gonna stay home, pass out some candy, maybe even throw a sheet over myself and call it a costume."

He laughs at that.

"I'm not even gonna stay the whole time. I'll even show up late." He explains to me over the busy hallway. I mean I haven't been to a party since Odessa and even then it wasn't much. Not like how I'm picturing it to be for a Hawkins Party.

The bell rings and he rolls his eyes.

"I'll let you know at lunch- or, wait don't you have to drop off Will tonight?" I ask.

"Yeah he and the other boys are going out trick-or-treating." Once he says that it reminds me that Mickey is not gonna be home with me. And I know my mom is gonna be home. But also my dad will be home. So it shouldn't be too bad.

Maybe keeping my options open wouldn't hurt.

"Alright so either at lunch or at the drop off for the boys, the latest I promise." I begin to walk backwards down the hallway as he does the same.

"Alright Jessie."

-

"This is becoming a habit for the two of us."

Billy's voice knocks me out of my trance. No I wasn't reading another kids book. This time I was just scribbling down little lyrics in my head in my english notebook. So far everything I've put down hasn't made sense or just doesn't sound right.

I shut my notebook and look up at him.

And of course he's smoking.

"One, it's not. Two, I was serious about the smoking thing. I'll leave." I explain to him.

As I begin to stuff my notebook in my bag I can see him drop the cigarette on the floor and stomp it out. I stop fixing up my bag to leave and lean back against the railing.

"You see?" His voice is laced with a bit of annoyance.

But then again he could just leave me alone and smoke all the cigarettes he wants. He chooses not to do that so it's not my fault.

"What do you want now Billy?"

It was always something with him. I didn't know it when we first encountered but ever since then it's been very evident that he's trying to get into my pants. The way he'd call for me in the hallways, or send a wink my way in the lunchroom, etc. I know other girls are dying to take a ride on the Billy train but I am not.

He sits next to me, knees to his chest and looks my way.

"I was wondering if you were gonna be at Tina's Halloween party?" He asks and lets the question float and linger a little too long. I guess he can read my face and tell that he's not gonna like the answer I have for him.

I shake my head and fake a sigh. "Sadly I wasn't invited. And even if I was I wouldn't go anyways. Not my crowd."

"You come with me and I'll be crowd enough for you honey." That must be his voice that he uses to get all the girls. Any other girl would be eating this up right now. Any other girl probably would have jumped his bones right here on these steps.

I stifle a chuckle as I shake my head once again.

"You know that it's not gonna work right? I cannot be charmed by your womanizer ways?" I question him as I grab my bag and sling it over my shoulder. I was getting bored with this conversation and I'd rather be in detention or in class.

I stand up as he chuckles to himself.

-

I still didn't give Jonathan his answer. At lunch I told him I was still thinking. Even though I was like eighty percent sure I was not going. And most of the reason why was because Billy would be there. I did not need to be hounded by him all night.

Steve sits down in his desk to my left side, handing me his essay as he does. This had to be our third time switching papers. I was tried of it. We've both seen each others papers enough to know that it's either going to drastically change or not at all.

There was nothing left to do.

I place my paper on his desk for him to read as I do the same with his. I think my brain has learned to block out the word basketball at this point.

All of a sudden I hear and see him scooch his chair over close to my side. My face changes with confusion, what the hell was he doing now? If he wasn't watching me like some creeper, he was trying to be my friend. And it was really weird.

"Hey so what are you doing tonight?" He asks.

Why does everyone wanna know what I'm doing tonight?! At this point I'm locking myself in my room with a bowl of candy and my guitar and trying to let this Halloween pass by. I didn't feel like passing by the gory decorations, or being scared by some lame kids.

I shrug my shoulders. "Nothing much. Passing out candy."

He scoffs.

"Ah man, you should come to Tina's Party."

What is going on?!

"You know I keep hearing about it and I don't know if it's really my scene to be partying with a bunch of kids who still view me as an outsider." I explain with a little bit too much detail because I can see the look on his face when I say that last part.

"I don't think you're an outsider." He says and I pass him a look. "Alright so you're not really with the cool kids but so what? It's our last year, who cares?"

"I do Harrington. I don't wanna go to some party and drink out of some stupid keg trying to impress others. I don't wanna dress up in some costume to play who wore it best either." The way that I said it, it came off as mean. I know it did. Because I wasn't thinking about anybody else feelings but my own.

Truth is, I think Steve is not an asshole but a fair guy. He's probably got more going for him than just being the basketball king, and 'the hair' Harrington.

And to lump him in with everyone else who's small minded and probably not going anywhere is mean. To judge him and make assumptions like that is mean. My parents and Dayton taught me better than that.

I see him sit back in his seat with a bit of a frown.

"Sorry. That was mean of me. I just- parties aren't really my thing." I kind of whisper because honestly I can't believe I'm apologizing to him I mean look how far we've come. He doesn't say much but nods his head. "Thanks for considering me not an outsider."

He picks up my paper and holds it in front of his face. "Yeah don't sweat it."

-

Alright this has to be some sort of elaborate joke or the world is just messing with me. It has to be one of the two I won't except anything else as an answer. It's ridiculous. It's absolutely absurd that more than three people have asked me if I'm going to Tina's stupid Halloween party.

I turn to my little brother with a hand on my hip.

"Why do you think I'd go to a party? Let alone some popular kids party," I put the wagon in park and shift in the drivers seat to face him "and let me remind you that I was 'milk girl'."

Mickey laughs- just has to laugh at me bringing that up. He opens the door without giving me and answer and joins his friends at the cul de sac.

What was the reason?!

Did I have Tina's party tattooed on my forehead?!

-

I put the keys in the dish bowl and shut the door behind me.

"Honey is that you?" My dad's voice asks from further in the house.

"Yeah it's me dad." I yell back.

I walk pass the dinning room and into the kitchen and see him with a cooking apron on. Not to say he doesn't cook but, usually his shift ends too late. Either my mother cooks dinner or we pick up food from someplace.

He's mixing something in a bowl as he greets me with a kiss to the cheek. "Hey how was school today? Any rad costumes?"

I scrunch my face in disgust. "Rad? Dad your vocabulary is starting to scare me."

He stops mixing and fakes a laugh.

"Oh I heard there's a party going on at some kids house- are you going to that? If you are you know you can't drink. And you can't be home after eleven. And no sex,-"

"First of all," I cut him off "I am not going to that party. I don't really associate with any of the kids there. And secondly, please never- ever- ever in my lifetime talk to me about sex."

He puts the bowl of whatever he's mixing down and turns to me. With both hands on his hips he gives me a stern look. "Look I know it's weird but it's a thing that happens. I mean look how many kids I've got-"

My face scrunches up again. "Dad-"

"Look, okay you're not going to the party. But I need to know that when the time comes that you will be safe, and not just with intercourse I mean with everything." There's a tone in his voice at the end there. He's talking about last year.

I walk up to him and place my arms around him. "I promise dad. I'll be safe."

"Good. You're my little girl you know, I gotta look out for you." He hugs me back.

I lean away from him with my eyebrows shot up high. "How un-feminist of you. I can't look out for myself? I'm just some damsel?"

"Nah, you could never be a damsel. Odessa raised you right, kid."

-

The pizza got here a few minutes after Mickey came home. It was like the night worked itself out. I didn't have to go to some party. I didn't have to be hounded by Billy. I didn't have to see any gory blood or costumes.

All in all, I think after everything I've been though this has been a good Halloween.

We're all munching down our slices when it hits me.

Where's my mother?

"Dad, when was mom supposed to come home?" I ask him and his face lights up.

He finishes chewing first, thank god. "I forgot to tell you. Your mother had to leave for some work thing. She'll be back in a few days."

I nod my head.

I have a few days worth of time without my mother.

Think of the possibilities!

"So what candy did you score tonight ghost buster?" My dad asks my brother.

He points over to a big sack that sits by the stairs. My dad gushes at him and tells him he did an amazing job. Me? I'm thinking about how I'm gonna get into that stash tonight. My dentist is going to hate me after this.

All in all, good Halloween.

[spaceskam]

you matter to me

Another addition to my fwb universe, dedicated to @christchex and an anon who kept me company all day yesterday. Special thanks to @callieramics for the idea of Liz being the meddler this time :)

“Alex, have you heard from Michael?”

Alex raised an eyebrow at Liz’s question. He actually hadn’t, but they usually didn’t talk about Michael. He looked over at his phone just to double-check that Michael had indeed not responded to any of his messages. While it was sort of uncharacteristic, Alex had assumed he had gotten sucked into studying for the physics test he had on Monday.

“No, why?” he said.

“He called into work today,” Liz said, “He never calls into work.” 

“What the fuck do you want me to do? I’m not his keeper,” Alex scoffed, but he very much wanted to find out what was going on. She was right, Michael was pretty on top of everything. He always found time for things, including Alex. Him going MIA didn’t really make sense.

“I don’t know, he came here when you were upset, I assumed you would go to him when he was upset,” Liz explained. Alex stared at her for a moment. Part of him wanted to deny her statement and bitch at her for it. After Michael had come that night, Maria and Liz had just collectively decided they were dating and they wouldn’t back off. Alex was brewing some type of way to fix it and make it stop because it was annoying. The whole point of not having a boyfriend was so he wouldn’t have to deal with them constantly talking about it.

That backfired.

However, she did have a point. He and Michael were best friends, Michael deserved Alex at least looking in to see if he was alright. But he didn’t need Liz or Maria to know that. So, he rolled his eyes.

Besides, Michael seemed to sense this conversation and shoot him a text.

Michael: come over

“What don’t you get about us not dating? He’s not my property, not my responsibility,” Alex scoffed, grabbing his keys off the counter, “Gonna go practice.”

“Alex, I didn’t mean to‒”

“It’s fine,” he said. He needed to fix whatever they thought.

But, first, he needed to go see Michael.

Alex: be right there

-

“This is a bad time.”

Alex cocked his head to the side at Isobel’s statement. It was never a bad time to go see Michael Guerin. That was sort of the point of having a friend with benefits. All times were good times, even if it was just for the friend part. And Michael had texted him so it absolutely wasn’t a bad time.

“Why?” Alex prodded. Isobel didn’t move out of the way.

“Because it’s a bad time.”

Alex stared at her for a moment and decided that something was actually wrong. Michael had gone to him when something was wrong even when no one asked.

“Hey, Michael!” Alex called loudly. Isobel stared at him like he’d lost it and tried to push on his chest, but wasn’t really successful since Michael came out of his room. The real twist was that he looked perfectly fine.

“Alex, hey,” he said with that same boyish smile on his face, trotting towards the door, “Izzy, let him in.”

Reluctantly, Isobel let him in and Michael basically dragged Alex to his room. He looked find. He sounded fine. His room looked fine.

“Are you good?” Alex asked for good measure once they were alone. Michael smiled and kissed him, not really giving much room to actually answer. Alex kissed him back, but still tried to look around the room.

Michael moved fast, kissing down his neck and pawing at his clothes. Alex let him and tried to find what was wrong. Because something was wrong.

“Liz said you called into work,” Alex mention, his hand softly cradling the back of Michael’s head. He didn’t respond, pushing them onto the bed. Michael’s kisses stayed fast and sloppy‒actually all of his movements were fast and sloppy. It felt like a massive red flag.

Alex tried to set a different pace, but Michael wasn’t really abiding by it. He was trying to strip himself and Alex and still kiss and touch all at once. It was a mess that did nothing but get Michael's shirt around his neck and one arm and Alex's jeans unzipped but not unbuttoned. Alex grabbed his face, making him stop. That’s when he saw the slightly manic look in his eyes.

“What?” Michael asked or, really, snapped. Alex furrowed his eyebrows. “Why are you stopping me? I need this. I texted you. I need this.”

Alex scoffed and shook his head. “What is wrong with you? What happened?”

“Nothing, okay? Will you just let me‒”

“No,” Alex stopped him, sitting up and forcing Michael to get off. He looked more than a little wounded but covered it up with a glare. “What is wrong with you?”

“Nothing, for fuck’s sake, you're not my dad,” Michael spat. Some deep, angry part of Alex considered saying 'yeah, you don’t have one’, but immediately felt guilty about it. He stared at Michael.

“You’re acting weird. You literally never act like that,” Alex pointed out. Michael rolled his eyes and groaned.

“Like what? Like I want to have sex with you? Literally, that’s why I texted you. You’re a booty call, Alex, that’s what this was supposed to be. Why’d you even come if you’re just gonna psychoanalyze me instead of just giving me what I want?” Michael snapped which told Alex without a doubt that something was very, very wrong. That wasn’t Michael.

Alex stood up and looked around the room, looking for anything that was out of place.

“What are you doing?” Michael demanded. Alex ignored him.

Alex opened the drawer of his nightstand and didn’t see anything weird, so he moved onto the dresser. Michael sat up attentively. He opened the top drawer and shuffled around, ignoring Michael telling him to stop. Beneath the sea of mix-matched socks, he found an opened envelope.

“Alex, fucking stop!” Michael said. He was beside him in seconds, trying to take the envelope. Alex pushed him off, but still fought over the envelope like children, like Alex had fought over toys with his brothers.

Alex learned very early how to win.

“Alex, please,” Michael said desperately as Alex pinned him to the dresser with his hip and his arm around his neck in the world’s loosest headlock.

The cover of the envelope read RETURN TO SENDER in big red letters over the handwritten name and address. Michael had sent a letter to some guy named Dr. Carl Kosh Sr. who lived in Odessa, Texas. Alex flipped open the flap that had been taped down and reopened, pulling out the letter from inside. It didn’t take him long to realize it was Michael sending a letter to the guy to say that he was his father. And that his father had simply added 'leave me alone' to the bottom of the letter and sent it back.

By the time that Alex figured all that out, Michael was limp in his grasp and crying.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” Alex asked, putting the letter on the desk and wrapping both his arms completely around him from behind. Michael was almost dead weight at that point.

"I don't know," Michael whispered, voice cracking weakly.

But Alex knew. He'd been on his ass about them just being fuck buddies recently, trying to go back to before the lines started blurring. As much as he was thankful for Michael taking care of him when he was sick and being there for him after his father, it was too much. They weren't boyfriends. He didn't want a boyfriend. He wanted someone who was just there when needed but wasn't overwhelming with relationship shit.

And apparently that told Michael that sex was the only comfort he was allowed.

"I didn't know you found your dad," Alex whispered, slowly rubbing his chest, "I didn't know you were looking."

"I didn't tell anyone except Izzy," he admitted. Alex hugged him close and started to lead him to the bed. "I didn't want anyone to know until I knew if he wanted to meet me."

"It's okay," Alex promised, tugging him into bed. Michael laid on his chest and Alex held him. He ignored the red flags in his mind. Those could be addressed tomorrow.

"I don't know why I looked for him," Michael cried, face hidden in Alex's shoulder, "Guess I thought that maybe he didn't know. I don't know why my parents gave me up, I just hoped maybe he would've wanted me if he knew. I did one of those stupid DNA test things and they brought me to his family tree and, and him. I just… I thought…"

Alex shushed him as he started crying harder. He didn't know how to fix this. There wasn't any fixing this. He couldn't heal wounds that had been there since he was born. All he could do was be there.

"He has kids, Alex," he sobbed. Alex held him tighter. "Why doesn't he want me?"

"Hey, hey, don't think like that," Alex whispered, bowed his face into Michael's hair. He did his best to curl around him, trying to give him as much comfort as possible. He pulled the blanket over them. "Fuck him. He's not worth it."

"He's my dad," Michael said.

"No, he's some guy who had sex with some girl who gave birth to you. They aren't your parents, they aren't your family. Isobel and Max are your family," Alex said, gently grabbing Michael's jaw so he'd look up at him, "I'm your family."

Michael stared at him with big, watery eyes. Alex's heart was beating to an off kilter rhythm. He was fucked. So, so fucked.

"You mean it?" he asked gently, his fingertips sliding beneath Alex's shirt innocently. He just wanted skin on skin.

"I mean it," Alex said sincerely, "Fuck him. It doesn't matter if he doesn't want you. We do, we all do. I know that might not help completely, but I hope you realize that you are so loved, Michael. So many people love you. That guy doesn't matter."

"I love you," Michael said, not even once breaking eye contact. Alex gulped and took a deep breath. Fuck. This was so fucked. He was too deep. This was what they were not supposed to do. Hell, Michael was the one that made the rule of them not ever falling in love.

How the hell did he get out of this without creating a mess?

"It's okay," Alex said instead, bringing his head into his chest. Michael clutched onto him, thankfully not seeming too hurt by Alex's dismissal.

This wasn't okay. He shouldn't have come. He needed to stop.

"I've got you," Alex whispered, running his hands through Michael's hair as he cradled him close.

This was a disaster. He was going to get hurt. They both were. There was no good way to end this. There was no good direction to follow. There was only down.

Alex held him all night instead.

[calebswitching]

Heart to heart with mom

Caleb has a long talk with his mother during parent week

@the-duvals

Clara and Caleb had agreed to meet at the gates of the school. She did want to try out this new supposedly 'classic Greek' cuisine, but mostly she wanted some time with just Caleb. She wanted to make sure she got time with all three boys alone during the week. Her dear sweet Nick was easy. They got into the kitchen and the communication flowed. Noah was impossible for reasons that she didn't want to explore. Caleb should have been easier, but her dear, logical, brilliant boy seemed to be... well she wasn't sure what, but obviously it had to do with the whole mess the month before. There had been no time to talk since he'd been missing for what felt like a year. Damn Mark for continuing to be in her son's life. She wasn't someone who liked violence, but God help that man if she ever got alone in a room with him. It all feels so out of her control. She smiled when she saw her son already there waiting for her. As soon as she was close enough she pulled him into a hug. "Oh... this is the thing I miss most. Getting to hug my sons whenever I want. I don't miss the science experiments in my fridge and growing on my windowsill but I do miss this." She steps back. "Let me get a look at you." It's then that she sees it. His collar is missing. "Oh... sweetheart."

Caleb should have been excited to see his mom.  And maybe part of him was.  He loved her, and he wanted to get a hug from her and to talk like they used to.  He just wanted to soak up her maternal presence while he had a chance, since he got to see her so rarely these days.  But he was dreading the conversation that he knew was coming.  He hadn't told her everything that had happened in July, and he hated talking about it.  Mostly because it flooded him with guilt.  He had been so stupid, reacted entirely in fear instead of thinking things through, and he'd almost ruined his claim in the process.  And he still wasn't wearing his collar.  Which his mother was going to notice, certainly.  Dad had noticed, when they'd gone to the book store together, but hadn't really commented, other than to ask a few gentle questions about how things were going with Eric.  Caleb hadn't explained about the collar, but his dad had seemed mollified by his reassurances that he and Eric were working through things and were still together.  But Caleb was sure his mother would want to know more. Still, seeing her smile at the sight of him made him smile too, and he sank into her hug.  It was odd, because despite being both taller and broader than her, she still made him feel like he was the one being held against her strong frame and enveloped in her arms.  Maybe it was a mom thing, a psychological thing, that she never lost the ability to make him feel safe like that.  He pulled back, huffing a soft laugh at the mention of science experiments in her fridge.  Then her expression changed, and his own smile froze, then faded.  He looked down, ashamed.  "It's, uh...  it's okay, I've got a cuff."  He held up his wrist to show her the cuff Eric had given him, which he began to fidget with.  "Plenty of people have cuffs for their claims..."  It was true, but it still sounded like an excuse.

Clara saw the change in him. At first it had been just as always. Her tall lanky man still seeming like just her her little boy as she hugged him. But as soon as she mentioned the collar he tightened up and closed off, his words sounding like nothing more than an excuse. Their claim hadn't been dissolved. Hector would have told her immediately about that. But now that she thinks back to their parting that morning he had been a bit cagey. "Yes, some people do choose cuffs for all sorts of reasons. Did you and Eric change your minds about having a collar?" She knows this wasn't some sort of aesthetic choice either of them had made. She straightened up and breath in deeply and let it out in a slow exhale. "Alright, listen my little dumplin' I know something real bad happened last month. I know you haven't wanted to talk about. Nick and Noah told me it was that damn... that it had to do with Mark, but kiddo you gotta tell your mom what's goin' on because I'm getting mighty worried right now." Her veneer always slipped away revealing just how much of a Texan girl she was in these moments. Moving to the big city, didn't change the fact that she was an Odessa country girl deep down. She took his hand and clasped it tightly in hers. "I love you Caleb Aaron Duv... Anderson and that will not change, but you've got to tell me what's going on." Her statement had all of the power of motherhood and Dominance behind it. A powerful combination of strength and love that no one could resist.

Caleb hesitated, unsure how answer.  Because, well, yes, they had changed their minds, sort of.  Or, Eric had, temporarily, while they worked on restoring trust between them. Fixing what Caleb had broken. But that wasn't what she meant, and Caleb knew it.  She was asking if they had simply decided they liked a cuff better, and the answer to that was no.  But then his mother continued, and Caleb was saved from having to come up with an answer, at least for a moment.  Not that it made him feel any better.  He could tell his mother was getting upset, because her southern accent was getting stronger.  He ducked his head and shifted his weight uneasily, even as he held on tightly to her hand when she took his.

"I'm sorry, mama," he said quietly.  He never called her that anymore, just mom, but it slipped out.  He suddenly felt like crying, and it was mortifying.  He was a grown man, he shouldn't break down in tears like a toddler just because his mom was the tiniest bit firm with him.  He swallowed and kept control of himself, carefully.  "I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to make you worry so much.  I, um...  I can't wear my collar right now."  His hand came up automatically to touch his throat where it should be.  "I'll get it back, when Eric and I... when we're okay again, I guess.  But I..."  He swallowed thickly again.  This was so difficult to admit.  "I broke his trust.  Some of it was Mark's fault, but I could have told Eric what was going on.  I had a chance, I could have gone to him.  Mark was threatening to hurt me, or Eric, or himself, but... I still made a choice not to tell Eric.  And I was the one who took the collar off.  So when I got back to school...  Eric wasn't ready for me to have again yet, is all.  Because it- it stands for something I had- had broken."  He grimaced, face screwed up, trying not to get emotional.

Clara's heart broke for he sensitive boy. All her sons were sensitive in their own ways. For Caleb it was different though because another human being had broken him open. He was like an open nerve and it was so damn unfair. She listened to him without interruption before sighing and nodding. She needed to be very careful here. Caleb was another Dominant's submissive now. And she herself had a duty as a fellow Dominant to look at this from that perspective as well as a mother who just wanted to protect her baby from everything and everyone. She pulled him into another hug and just held him. "Just breathe dumplin'. Just breathe with me for a minute. Okay?" She didn't care who was there or who saw. They could all get bent as far as she was concerned. She'd spied a small stone bench under a larch oak tree not far off and she pulled back to take his hand and lead him over. She sat and patted the space next to her.

"First, I'm so sorry all of that happened. Mark needs to be dealt with. This is completely unacceptable. He can't keep coming into your life and turning it upside down." She let that sit for a moment before continuing on to the tough stuff. "I love you, my own. I love you more than the sun... more than paprika and you know how much I love paprika." She chuckled wanting to keep things as light as possible. "I love you and I also know that you should have trusted your Dom. You know that, he does, it's not something that needs to be discussed too much. But what I think is the larger issue is that we might need to start really facing what his abuse of you did. Because dumplin' I know how much you trust Eric. That boy means the world to you and more than that, he taught you to trust after someone crushed all of your trust into dust. After someone you loved pulled trust from your heart fiber by fiber. I don't think trust is the issue here. I think trauma is the issue." She held his gaze. "Eric is right to wait until you've worked out this breach of trust. But how are you doing that? What work are you doing?"

Caleb let himself be pulled into his mom's arms again and tried to breathe, like she said.  He didn't cry, but it was a near thing.  He just breathed, slowly, counting to ten before exhaling again, then counting again, and repeating until he could feel the horrible tightness in his throat recede.

He followed her over to the bench, glancing around as he did.  No one was nearby.  Good.  He didn't want an audience for this conversation.  Obediently, he sat next to her, though he began to fidget immediately.  He stared down at his knees as she spoke, though the comment about paprika got a weak chuckle out of him.  He looked up at her towards the end, watching her with a worried expression.  It was comforting to hear her say she knew how much he loved Eric.  He was still so scared that people thought he was lying, and he didn't really love his Dom, or didn't love him enough, or the way he should.  As she finished, though, Caleb looked down again.  "...We're trying," he said quietly.  "I'm still seeing my therapist.  And I'm trying to do better about communicating.  Eric says he just needs time... and I'm trying to be patient.  He deserves whatever space he needs, after what I put him through.  Especially after Mav..."  His mother had heard all about that, back in May, when Caleb had missed his co-sub so much.  "I hurt him, mom.  I might still be dealing with what Mark did, but now he's hurting, too, and it's my fault."  His throat felt tight again, and he grimaced and turned his face away.  "I don't know how to handle it.  I... I'm not allowed to leave campus with anyone but him or Noah right now, because he doesn't trust me, but I haven't told him that I'm scared to leave campus anyway.  I'm glad I'm not allowed because then it's easy to use as an excuse if someone asks.  I don't know how to fix anything.  There's nothing I can do, but just try to be good, and obedient, and hope it's enough."

Clara again listened carefully and quietly. She let a breath of a laugh pass her lips as she reached up to cup his cheek for a moment. "That's a whole lot to unpack isn't it?" She tilted her head from side to side. "I believe you dumplin'. Neither of you are the type to give in are you? You'll keep trying. All claims have their problems. Your father and I have had plenty of tough times. Times I thought our claim might fall apart. And we've hurt each other. I hate to admit just as much as you hate to admit you hurt Eric. But you are admitting it. You are owning it and working to fix it." She smiled wanly. "You don't have to know how to fix it. Sometimes I think it's the effort that is the answer in and of itself. Claims are never easy. You have to work." She nodded. "I know how hard it is, but give him that space right now. There's a lot he's working through as well, I'm sure." She shook her head. "Oh dumplin' you are good. You are such a good submissive and Eric knows that. I think it's not your obedience that needs to be addressed. It's that fear. You've come a long way toward rebuilding your ability to trust. I saw that the last time I was here, but then the fear came and shattered it." She rolled her lip in and out before looking back at him. "Would you be alright with me talking to Eric? Not to put him on the spot or try and hurry him or anything like that. Just to give him the chance to talk things through."

Caleb ducked his head down and nodded.  It was strange to hear his mom admit to having hurt dad, or vice versa, but logically he understood.  Two people couldn't live together for three decades without at some point hurting the other one's feelings.  It had always just seemed like his parents' relationship was perfect, and that they both always knew what they were doing.  But of course they had been young once.  He let out a breath and nodded.  "I'm trying," he murmured.  "It's so hard, mom.  Because he's my Dom.  It's so hard to give him space, when I need him so much.  We're sleeping in the same bed again now, but the first few weeks, when we weren't... I couldn't sleep.  I felt so guilty just being in his bed, when he was in the spare room.  But he wouldn't listen, and I didn't want to push, I didn't want to argue over something so inconsequential...  And I know he's trying to be what I need, too, but it's all so delicate, I'm scared to push him on anything." He let out a breath when she reassured him that he was good.  Oh, how he wanted that to be true.  It was easy to let himself believe it, at least for a second, coming from his mom.  But she was right, he knew, about the fear.  It was poison, and he didn't know how to be rid of it.  He bit his lip, nervous and unsure, but nodded.  "If you want to," he said softly.  "Just please don't make him feel bad.  He's so worried that he's not a good Dominant.  He thinks that all this is at least partly his fault, and he blames himself for not realizing what was going on with Mav, and he's scared he isn't doing enough to help me.  And I don't want him to feel any worse.  He's been so good to me.  He doesn't know how good he is."

"Oh dumplin' of course you need him. And you can tell him that. Giving him space doesn't mean he stops being your Dom. In fact I think telling him exactly what you just told me will go so far to rebuilding his trust. Telling him how frightened you are to go into town. Telling him all of the feelings you're having." She paused. "This is going to be hard for you to hear, but you might have to argue with him. You're going to have to fight like hell for him. And part of that is going into that uncomfortable space where you tell him all of these things. You're working hard to keep him comfortable, but sweetheart in the end he doesn't want comfort he wants you. That you are floundering without him will not make him feel upset. It might be hard for him right now, but he's your Dom and he needs to know that you need him. Clara shook her head. "I will not be making him feel bad. I promise. I want to be a Dom he can talk to as well as someone who knows you and knows the situation." She nodded. "I think it's possible that with what happened with Mav, he's dealing with his own kind of trauma. That's what I'm concerned about. You're both hurt and your traumas are banging against each other. It's not about one or the other of you being 'bad' or 'doing it wrong'. You both just need a little guidance to get back on the path."

Caleb let out a breath and sagged a little.  She was right, he knew that.  Communication, wasn't that what Eric was always telling him?  He needed to speak up, say how he felt.  But he'd been so scared lately that if he asked for anything, Eric would just give it to him, regardless of how Eric actually felt.  That Eric wouldn't take the space he needed if Caleb asked him for anything. But then again, maybe that was just another failure to entrust his needs to his Dominant.  Wasn't the point of submitting to Eric to let him choose how and when Caleb's needs were met?  He was just so scared of doing the wrong thing, and it seemed like anything he chose had a good chance of being wrong.  "I know," he said quietly, miserably.  "I think he knows that I need him.  He has to know.  But...  you're right, I know you're right.  I'll do better, I promise." Caleb sagged a little and tipped to the side to lean against his mom, putting his head down on her shoulder.  "I hate that he doesn't think he's a good Dom.  I don't know what to do to convince him.  I can't even begin to understand how he could think that, but he really does.  He worries about not being good enough, and losing me and our claim because of it.  And it's hard for me to understand because...  I know I've told you about how amazing he is, mom, how patient he is with me, but...  Everyone says their Dom is wonderful and amazing, it just sounds like I'm in love with him.  And I am.  But he's more than that, he's so good, and I don't understand how he doesn't see it.  He got me to trust again.  He did.  When we met... I couldn't even admit to being upset in front of him, he tried to get me to tell him what was wrong one day and I hid in his bathroom because I couldn't do it, and he wouldn't let me leave while I was upset.  I know I still struggle with trust, but I never would have come so far without him.  Never."

Her sons were forever open books to her. Their thoughts were written across their beautiful faces. "Good boy. You'll feel... well you'll feel nervous and maybe a little worse at first, but in the end you'll be glad you opened up to him completely. Share it all with him, dumplin'. I know it's scary but share the good, the bad, and the ugly. Might be he shows you how mighty beautiful what you think is ugly actually is." When he leaned against her, she put her arm around him and held him tight. "There's nothing you can do. He's got to learn that for himself. These are the things that will make him truly understand what it means to be a Dom. Not the surface trappings. Doms hafta dig real deep to find what truly makes them a Dom. What makes us deserving of these marks." She nodded. "You love him and that's a very good thing because you have so much to love, but it's all of the other things that makes your claim strong. Stronger than this. You're both stronger than this." She thought about Caleb hiding in the bathroom unable to talk about his feelings. He's come so far and a lot of that is owing to Eric Anderson. "I'll talk to him. You'll see he'll come around. In the meantime just open up all of yourself to him. I promise you won't regret it."

Leaning against his mom, Caleb was able to believe, at least for the moment, that things weren't hopeless.  That he could say all these things to Eric and it wouldn't be scary.  And it made him feel better that she wanted to talk to Eric, too.  Hopefully she would be able to tell him just how good he has been for Caleb, and what an amazing Dom he really was.  Maybe hearing it from another Dominant would help.  "Thanks, mom," Caleb murmured.  "For talking to him.  I'll do better, I promise.  I can be patient.  I want my collar back, but I can wait until he's ready.  My instinct is always to keep quiet, not bother him, not burden him.  But I know you're right, that isn't submitting, it's holding back, and it's not my place to choose what he does or doesn't do for me.  I have to tell him what's in my head, or he isn't making a decision not to give me what I want, I'm making that decision for him."  He let out a heavy breath.  "It just feels like I'm being demanding, you know?  I don't want to push for more than he wants to give."

"Of course Cay. I will do anything to help." She felt her heart break a little. "And I know you'll do better, because you are better. You are wonderful. You're an amazing man and a beautiful submissive. And bit by bit as you heal and he heals you'll see that it will get better for both of you." She nodded. "You will need to be patient about the collar for now. Tell him everything, but let him decide when to put that collar back on you. He will, dumplin. I have no doubt about that. But yes be patient. When he puts it on you the second time it will be for a stronger claim. You will remember that day forever." She furrowed her brow. "You're absolutely right. There may come times that you're not ready to talk or that you need to make a decision for yourself. You're a submissive, not a slave. When those times come you just need to trust that you can tell him about that too. This is why we all gotta go to Institute. None of this stuff is at all easy."

Caleb nodded without lifting his head from her shoulder. "I know that, mom. That sometimes I have to make decisions and boundaries and it doesn't mean I'm being disrespectful. It's... Sometimes it's hard because somewhere in the back of my head is this voice that I should just submit, regardless of anything else, but I know I'm not a slave and I get to have a say. It's not really an issue, since Eric always asks how I feel about things. And I'm getting better at telling him even if he doesn't ask. And I have a safe word. Not just during scenes. We have a second one. I haven't had to use it much, but it's for times when I don't know what to do or I'm nervous and I need him to check in with me.  Heisenberg.  You know, because it's an uncertainty principal."

Clara smiled. Her sweet, scientific boy was still just that. "I think that's an excellent strategy. Having situation specific safewords is a good practice that not many claims take advantage of. Your father has a certain gesture that is situation specific." She smiled warmly thinking of her submissive. He is where the boys get their sensitivity from.  "Can't tell you what it's for since that would be breach of his trust, but I can tell you that it has been real helpful. But let me ask you something. Have there been times especially recently that you've needed to use that safeword, but you held back?"

Caleb felt a little better when his mom approved of their strategy.  The information about dad made him lift his head to look at her curiously.  Internally, he debated whether it would be a bad idea to ask dad about it.  He didn't want to make his dad uncomfortable, but he was suddenly very curious.  His mom's next question, though, made him look down again, and he shrugged.  "I don't know," he said softly.  He hadn't thought about that, lately, but now that she brought it up, he realized she was right.  He looked away, feeling guilty.  "Yes.  Probably.  ....Definitely.  I was trying to just accept what he wanted...  But yeah.  There were times."

Clara took his hand and squeezed. "I'm not asking to put you on the spot or make you feel bad. But you gotta let that boy know these things. That's why he wants you to have that safeword. It's not a limited supply that you have to save up. You need to use it whenever you feel uncertain. That's how he will know when you are having troubles. He'll figure out the things that trigger your anxiety. He'll figure out what things are connected to your trauma and bit by bit he'll be able to shield you from them."

Caleb grimaced but nodded. "I know, mom. I can do better. I've gotten better, I promise. Better than I was a year ago." He let out a breath and leaned his head on her shoulder again. "I will do better. I just want to be good, and make him happy. I hate that he has to be so careful with me. I hate being so difficult. And he always says I'm not, that I'm not difficult and it isn't a sacrifice, but that's not true. He doesn't want me to think I'm difficult because then I won't ask for things, but I'm not an idiot. The times he stays up with me in the middle of the night because I had a panic attack, or he changes his plans because I reacted badly to something, all the times he sets aside what he wants because he's worried he'll make me uncomfortable.  I know you're right, and the right thing for me to do is just to communicate and be honest and use my safe word, and trust him to make space for himself too. But I just hate how difficult it is for him. It isn't fair to him. He doesn't deserve this."

"I know sweetheart. I know." She didn't want him to think she didn't know how hard he'd worked. "This is just a little speedbump on the path. You'll both be stronger once you get past it." She shook here head firmly. "You are not difficult. You have been through difficult things. Eric knows that and he loves you. He chose you. He cares about you. He wants you as his submissive. All of those things are part of being a Dominant. They are the the things we want to do for the people we care about. We want to stay up late to comfort them. We want to help them and guide them." She paused, using her finger under his chin to make sure he was looking in her eyes. "I happen to like Eric and I happen to think he deserves to have a wonderful, caring, intelligent, and sensitive submissive like you."

Caleb grimaced but didn't argue.  He'd learned by now that there was no point in arguing when someone who loved him tried to convince him he wasn't difficult.  He knew he was, but he also knew they would never admit to it.  Because they loved him, and they would do anything for him, and they didn't want him to think of his needs as an imposition.  But that didn't mean he wasn't difficult.  Love didn't make something easy, just doable.  He let out a breath and nodded, listening to his mother, and then looked up at her when she prompted him.  He wasn't expecting what she said, though, and it made him smile and look down shyly.  "Thanks, mom," he mumbled, feeling a bit awkward with such open praise.  He knew his mom loved him, but that was a long string of positive adjectives she'd just used.  "...Eric agrees with you, just so you know.  We'll be okay.  I'm okay.  I promise."