#Blitz and Mox's relationship means a lot to me okay?

[strivia]

Blitz piecing together the shit-show of a situation they walked into in 2x03.

I am a sucker for protective Blitz, and while Millie was the person doing all the fighting in the climax of this episode, Blitz really was here like, "oh hell no, these fucks are not taking Moxxie from us!" too.

[itsmarsss]

bet. [Blitzø x Reader] (Helluva Boss)

(established relationship, talks about sex, blitz uses the word babygirl but otherwise gender neutral, will probably have a part 2 with the actual smut.)

“Well, that was really fucking awful,” Blitzø states, clearly irritated, as the two of you entered his office, and you already know how this was gonna go.

He was going to say he was annoyed because the double murder you’d all gone off to that morning had spiraled out of control, but when had any of your killings played out as planned? He was actually annoyed about his favorite coat getting partially burnt.

“Fucking Moxxie. Always gotta fuckin’ mess shit up,” he mutters under his breath as he begins undressing, taking the coat off first and examining the burnt fabric before disposing of it carelessly on the floor. 

“Will you relax already?” You lean on his desk, crossing your arms over your chest. “We killed more than half our targets for the day and it’s not even noon yet.”

“Yeah well if we all followed the plan it wouldn’t have been such a mess.” His bow tie was the next to go. 

“Blitz? I love you.”

He looks up at you, an unamused look in his face, stopping midway through sliding his suspenders off his shoulders. “Uh-huh, but what?"

"Why does there have to be a but? Could I not be telling you I love you just because?"

"You could. But I can feel a but in there."

"That's what she said."

He shoots you another unamused look.

“Okay, fine, but we got the job done, didn't we? Regardless of anything that might have happened."

“Oh stop licking their assholes,” he complains with an eyeroll, detaching the red skull charm from the collar of his shirt. “Catch,” he tells you, throwing it in your direction. You place it on the desk and he begins unbuttoning his somehow still pristine white shirt. “You just don’t want me to yell at him.”

“Well yeah? It would be a little hypocritical.”

He stops midway through undoing the buttons. “You saying I fuck up?” He questions, incredulous.

“Yes? All the time. We all do.”

He huffs in annoyance, unable to find a good retort within himself. Other than an ‘oh, fuck off’, of course. He only keeps undressing, taking the shirt completely off.  

“Hey, it’s alright to be upset that your coat’s burnt. I know you liked it a lot.”

“What? I’m not ‘upset’ about it,” he air-quotes, mocking your voice with an accent that sounds nothing like yours. “‘S just a stupid fucking coat.”

“Whatever you say, pretty boy,” you extend your hands to take the shirt from him. “Stop leaving your clothes on the floor,” you reprimand, and he rolls his eyes again before collecting the discarded clothing from the floor and throwing it to you. You place everything except the coat on the chair next to you, inspecting the item for a moment. “Hey, it’s not that bad. We can go get it fixed tomorrow. And if they can't fix it I bet we can find another one just like it, we’ll just leave Millie and Mox to handle the morning kills. How ‘bout that?”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. I’m taking a shower.” 

“I can see that,” you grin, making sure to exaggerate on the once-over you give his shirtless body.

“Aw, c’mon, don’t look at me like that, you know I get horny when I’m mad!” 

“What did I do?”

“You just checked me out!”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Uh-huh.”

“I did not.”

“Yeah you did you conniving witch!”

“Where the fuck did you even learn that word?”

“Honestly I don’t know what it means, but it sounded like it fit.”

“Surprisingly, it kinda does.” 

“See? You picked a smart man.” He teases.

“Sure did. A nerd ,even, one might say.” 

“Okay, nerd crosses a line.” 

You let out a laugh and he unbuttons his pants, pulling the zipper down and taking them off, leaving him only in his ‘honse’ patterned underwear. He leaves the pants on the floor and turns around towards the tiny bathroom connected to his office to take his shower.

“What’d I say about leaving the clothes on the floor?” You call from behind him.

He stops, turning back to look at you. “It’s my office.” 

“Doesn’t mean you should just leave stuff on the floor. You wouldn’t be all too pleased if I did the same-“ your voice dies out as you reach the end of your sentence and you purse your lips together, realizing your mistake:

“You’re more than welcome to leave your clothes on my floor right this second if you want to,” he smirks, raising his eyebrows up and down.

“Okay, okay, I walked right into that one. Go take your shower.”

“What? You’re evil, you know that?”

“What the fuck did I do?”

“You got me all hot and bothered now I’m not gonna be able to shower!” He explains, completely serious about it.

“I hardly think you wouldn’t be able to shower just ‘cause you’re a little horny.” 

“I’m not a little horny, baby, I’m mega stupid thunder horny right now, c’mon.” 

“Please don’t ever use those words together again.”

“Come shower with me,” he asks before he walks up to you, with a fake pout and puppy dog eyes, his hands on each side of you on top of the desk, caging you against it. 

One of your hands is instinctively placed over his bare chest, running your fingertips over it. “You know I’d love to, baby, but we both know that shower doesn’t fit both of us,” you laugh at the memory- you’ve tried. 

“Stupid fuckin’ tiny-ass shower,” he mumbles under his breath in frustration, eyes glancing at the floor for a moment as he very clearly tries to think of other alternatives. His mischievous grin quickly reappears as he looks back up at you. “Guess I’m just gonna have to fuck you here, then.” 

Look, you’ve fucked in his office. That’s no taboo- few things are when it comes to him. You’ve fucked on the couch, you’ve fucked on the floor, against pretty much every wall, against the door, on his chair. You name it, you’ve done it. The only place in there you had yet to deprave was, funnily enough…

“Haven’t fucked you on this desk yet. Wanna try it out?” 

"And then we can shower?"

"You still on about the shower thing? I'm trying to have some filthy raunchy passionate sex here."

"Oh silly me, I interrupted, sorry."

"Oh you're acting real funny today, aren't you? So what do you say?"

"Bet."

“Oh, fuck yeah.” His hands travel behind your thighs and he lifts you up into a sitting position on top of the desk behind you. “Gonna fuck you so good everyone outside’s gonna hear you screaming my name.” 

“That’s presumptuous.”

“Stop making up words, babe, it ain’t cute,” he complains as wastes no time before placing open-mouthed kisses on your neck.

You roll your eyes at him. “You know what that one means.” 

“No fancy words during sex, babygirl, it throws me off my rhythm. And it’s not ‘presumptuous’ if I can deliver, by the way.” 

“See you do know what it- shit- what it means. Are you ever going to shut up and deliver, then?” 

“Impatient, are we?”

“Yes. Now at least kiss me or I swear to fucking Satan I’ll-“

“Yup, that’ll do, shutting up now.”