#And ive always been a sickly baby

[tinyperson00-venting]

I'm actually afraid to fall asleep again..

For the past week Ive been waking up from suffocating and not being able to breathe because my cough has gotten so bad. It's not even that I'm sick or anything, it's just a dry raspy, painful cough that won't go away and gets so bad that I can't breathe.

I think Ive definitely got something wrong with me- as If my heart problems and anemia weren't already trying to due me in

Honesty Im split. Like on one hand, if I fall asleep again and die in my sleep from not being able to breathe, it'll all be over and I can be free finally.. but on the other hand, how will I know? And it's painful when it happens. It scares me when I can't breathe and I'm choking on my own breath for minutes at a time.

idk what to do. Ive been getting less than an hour and a half of sleep every day for the past week and a half now because of this stupid issue, but I can't sleep otherwise I'll stop breathing again. What if my body doesn't wake me up this time, you know??

Well, if I stop showing up.. you'll know what happened.

[ghostmaldo]

𖤣.𖥧.𖡼.⚘ RE3 Remake: Taking care of Sick Jill and Carlos (Seperate) with GN!Reader~General head cannons 𖤣.𖥧.𖡼.⚘

I am barely recovering from being sick from a week long cold and this sort of just manifested into my head and I thought, why not? Less evil in this Resident.

No warning, just natural sickness and fluuuuff

I didn’t really proof read this… my bad

Ask box open 💙

Play list I listened to while writing this—> Best of Resident Evil on Spotify ^^

~Maldo

❀ Jill Valentine ❀

~So, I picture SO and Jill have been living together for sometime in their shared apartment. It started with a slight sneezing fit throughout the day. Nothing a bit of allergy medicine couldn’t fix. However, by the end of the day SO would notice shes doing clearing of her throat more often and ask her about it. She’d simply reply with: “My throats just a little dry.”

~However, by the next morning Jills throat is completely raw, her nose is stuffed up, body aches, chill. Mad suffering. She insists she can walk it off but with some firm convincing from SO she’s politely shoved back into bed while they run to the nearest store to get her some medicine and things that are easy on the stomach. Jill sleeps the entire time their gone and only stirs agains when she hears the front door open. An instinct of hers.

~SO comes back with the best of medicine, sports drinks in her favorite flavor and of course some chicken noodle soup in the shape of stars. Upon seeing the stars printed on the front label she laughs (In a sickly way) “Stars… really?” SO nods and claims it would help her feel better.

~Having a warm bowl of soup and medicine admisintered by SO. Jill melts into the blankets and knocks out for the next several hours. She’s incredibly touched by her SO checking in on her every once and awhile. She’s always slightly aware when they enter their shared bed room, placing their slightly cold hand on her forehead or cheek to check for her temperature. But she keeps her eyes closed and allowed them to make her comfortable. It��s… a nice feeling for her.

~A real swooning moment would be when SO exits the room again. Gently closing the door behind them as to not disturb a resting Jill Valentine.

~When Jills feeling up to it. SO would help them into a warm bubble bath to help with the congestion. Afterwards, SO can suggest rubbing Vix on her chest to further help with the snuffles.

~A repeat of this cycle and after a few days. Jill starts to feel good as new. On the first day shes feeling much better but still a little groggy. Shell crawl out of bed with a blanket and find SO. Who’s currently on the couch doing one of their own activities quietly, though they are happy to see Jill out of bed. Together they take a nap with the sun rays warming them from the window. It’s the final medicine dose Jill needs to be back at 100%.

~Snuggles and forehead kisses with Jill make Maldo’s heart melt

“Thank you for taking care of me for the last few days. Ive been so use to taking care of myself I forgot what it was like to be dotted on.”

~Que a warm embrace and a tender kiss

❀ Carlos Oliveira ❀

~Carlos makes it everyone’s problem that his sick and by everyone I mean his SO. While his groaning and tossing and turning in his bed. SO finally comes to check up on him and his just laying there with these big merciful doe eyes. Before he has a chance to say anything, his body send him into a coughing fit that has him curling back into bed.

~SO: “I told you you were getting sick-“

~Pillow thrown at them from the man baby.

~Anyhow, SO proceeded to find some medicine in their apartments cabinet and a thermometer to take his temperature along with a cold rag. Poor guy did look really pale and clammy. If Carlos does have a fever, SO has to be prepared to wrestle the blankets off of him as his shivering from said fever.

“Carlos you have a fever!”

“I’m coooold!”

~Finding a can of chicken soup with stars in the kitchen. SO leaves Carlos with a movie running in their shared bedroom while they warm up the soup on the stove for him. As they read the medicine has to be taken with food or he’ll be sick and with an upset stomach-

~When he sees the bowl of soup he scowls slightly. “Haha very funny…. Staaars (S/O)” Listen I thought it was funny

~Will not let his SO leave his side. After the medicine starts to make him drowsy he literally pulls SO into bed with him and snuggles against them. And looordy is he a heater even without his blankets. Carlos claims he’ll only get better if he has his beloved next to him the entire time. With a sigh, SO relents, but faces away from him as the little spoon as a precaution to avoid getting sick themselves.

~Only takes about a day or two to recover and is ready to go back out into the world. As a token of his appreciation for dealing with him. Carlos takes SO out for dinner at their favorite restaurant.

“Hey, thanks for the last few days. I was a brat… but I appreciate you for taking care of me.”

~Que forehead kiss and Carlos wrapping an arm around their shoulders and pulling them in closer.

[blackdollette]

omg school has been so so so hectic for me.

but ive said my thoughts on sub x sub stuff right ? k so ! dom x dom jack (or euro coz mmm euro) and reader :3

like jus imagine its their first non vanilla night and jack is hyping himself up, imagining what hes gonna do to his precious "sub". he knows that readers always been a bit pushy during their makeouts and very vocal on if she needs more foreplay or anything. but they start making out and getting naked and hes tryna push her on her back on the bed but shes like "whatre u doing?" and flips them over and grabs his hair and stuff :3 "did you really think i was gonna obey your every word? be serious, jacky baby."

yayy you're back!!

"i want you on me." | jack thurlow

chemtrrails over the country club. - lana del rey

✮⋆˙ [tags] @faesucksass @lustkillers @angelsanarchy @mayathepsychic1999 @josibunn @livingdead-materialgirl@romanroyapoligist @oliviah-25@si1nful-symph0ny @auggiethecreator @vanlisbon@livingdead-reilly

dom!female!reader x dom!jack

word count: 1.3k

contents: 69 position, blowjob, slight femdom, lots of nasty stuff

you had him running completely mad. since the start of your relationship, he realized how different you were from all his past conquests. your first night together had ended in a sloppy makeout session that left your image engraved in his mind ever since. and that’s how he found himself at the drugstore checkout, putting down a box of flavoured condoms in front of the cashier.

“ring ‘er up.” he pulled out a few dollar bills, slamming them onto the counter without making direct eye contact with the young worker. his mind buzzed with thoughts of you laying down in front of him with his pulsating cock down your throat as you sucked on it through the sweet latex. he had never purchased this before, but he wanted to sweeten things up for you a little. because you were special. 

he shoved the box into his pocket, making his way out of the store. your long conversation with him from the night before had finalized your plans of spending the night with him. your innocent request rang through his head all night. he imagined your sweet little pussy hovering over his face, all busted up from the endless rounds of stimulation that he would put you through.

he had everything planned to the last letter even though he had always been the spontaneous type. he even went as far as cleaning his room a little. he was that desperate to make things work out tonight. 

as he arrived back at this place, he set the condoms on his dresser. the sun started to fall below the horizon and before he knew it, the doorbell rang, signaling your arrival. he lept up from his seat, quickly dashing to the mirror to check himself out. he looked tired and sickly with week-old stubble spotting his jaw, making him look attractive in such an effortless way.

you stood shyly on his stoop, fidgeting with one of the buttons on your cute little black skirt. the door swung open and you were met with his cold, blue eyes. from his perspective, you looked like a child’s doll. the wind blew up the fabric a little, giving him a tiny peek at your lacy little panties. the motion caused a sizzle to burn in his core. he wanted you. badly.

he took your hand, pulling you inside. once you were about 6 inches away from him, he shut the door behind you, pinning you there and kissing you deeply. you gasped slightly into the kiss before melting into his touch, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs and his waist. your aching clit brushed against his clothes boner, pulling out a groan from his swelling lips. 

he carried you up the stairs, gripping your ass firmly enough to make you whimper. you were practically putty in his hands, and right now he just wanted to see how far he could take you. he would destroy you tonight. he reached his bedroom, collapsing onto the bed with you writhing underneath him. 

before you knew it, you were both stripped down to the flesh. jack laid you down on your back as your tongues fought the silent yet heated battle. your nude bodies were tangled with one an other, the need and passion in your movements growing faster as each second passed. he had two curled fingers shoved in your needy cunt as he sucked harshly on your bottom lip.

he parted your lips for just to take a good look at you. he was going feral, his motions resembling those of a wild animal. he quickly pumped his cock as he trailed sloppy kisses down your jaw, making a disgusting mess of cum as he helplessly bucked his hips into the edge of the mattress. 

needy groans escaped from his spit-covered lips. he was falling apart before you had even done anything yet. he went to shove his pulsating length inside of you, but before he could react he was flipping onto his back with you on top of him, keeping your legs on either side of him. a look of great confusion flickered across his face until you started using his red, leaky tip to toy with your tiny clit.

your eyes conveyed a message that your lips wouldn't speak. he cleared his throat, his voice coming out as a low croak. “w-what’s goin’ on, doll..?” a smile spread across your lips as you leaned forward to bring yourself to his level. you trailed a finger down his neck, making him shiver. you brought your lips to his ear, whispering so sweetly that he could’ve melted right there. “i’m gonna have a lot of fun with you tonight…”

so the tables had turned. and so quickly that his head was still spinning. he watched as you picked up the box of condoms from the dresser, reading out the words. “strawberry flavoured condoms. cute.” your belittling words made his cheeks flush and alarming shade of red. you opened the box, taking one out and tearing it open with your teeth. the simple gesture made a stream of cum leak down his length as a deep groan escaped his lips.

you moved down, turning yourself around so that while you were face-to-face with his aching cock, your dripping cunt was right in front of his face. he was lost for words at the sight of your fat little pussy. you rolled the rubber down his length, watching as the condom was already swelling around his girth.

wasting no time, you spat on the tip, taking the whole thing down your throat in an instant. the sweet taste of the condom filled your mouth, making it all the more enjoyable for you. his muscles contracted as all of his most disgusting fantasies were finally coming true. he couldn’t hold himself back any longer. sweet moans and breathy whimpers caused his chest to rise and fall. this was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. but he’d be lying if he said he wasnt loving it.

you ground your ass on his face a little, using his angular nose to get yourself off. you gagged and slurped up his dick, spit bubbling running down his balls and ruining the bedsheets underneath you. jack brought his hands up, using four fingers to start fingering you vigorously. you moaned deeply, the vibrations travelling down his veins. he buried his flushed face in your pussy, using his tongue and teeth to tug at your hard pearl as his nose penetrated your wet folds.

you screamed out as hot cum started pouring out of your hole, completely covering his face. as nasty as it was, he couldn’t get enough of the taste of your juices. he lapped up every last drop, wanting you to gush and squirt all over him. your legs wrapped around his head, nearly crushing him to death.

not a single thought could travel through your mind as his hypnotic movements pushed you closer to the edge. your nails dug into his thighs, leaving deep, crescent-shaped cuts all over them. his dick wiggles in front of your face as the condom filled up like a water balloon. you fondled his balls in your hands, sensing his orgasm coming.

you took his cock into your throat once more, wanting to feel him in your guts more than anything. tears streamed down your face as it hit the back of your throat repeatedly, but the pleasure of it was undeniable. your bodies were like a ticking time bomb, just waiting to explode from the abundance of stimulation. 

“d-doing such a good job, jack… j-just like that…” you rocked your hips against his face, not caring whether he’s suffocating or not. his muffled whimpers signalled that he was doing just fine under there. he reached a hand forward, pushing your head down his length as you swirled your tongue around him.

he fucked your face vigorously, letting the last amount of control in him take charge. this complicated display of dominance and submission was what made this truly orgasmic for the both of you. you both pushed eachother to your limits and far beyond them, making a complete mess of eachother in the process. 

needless to say, your first time with him truly turned his world upside down.

author's note: not too proud of this one :(( at least this visual is nice. but anyways this was supposed to come out like two weeks ago. enjoy yall!

[muns0nslov3r]

OKOK i am so need for this rn you have No IDEA.

I need a fix with f reader givning Eddie a blowjob and he’s just a big mess whining and moaning, praising and dirty talk. Like please 😭

Eddie leans his head back, eyes rolling onto the back of his head “Fuck sweetheart.. shit your doing so- mgh- so fucking good. You’ve been wanting to do this all day huh? Yeah? Fuck~”

OUHGYHBGU8EHT7YUGTUH OF COURSE, HOLY SHIT.

im legit gonna use all my energy to do this sense im sickly sick. cause probs after this im gonna pass out real fucking hard.

warnings ; bjs, praise kinkk<3, eddie is so noisy.. ( THATS ALL IG )

eddie was sitting on his couch, watching random shows on the tv while strumming his guitar a bit. waiting for you to arrive after working at family video, he knew youve been needing him all day. glancing at him during class, not keeping your hands to yourself, being needy towards him, basically hanging off him all day. that was until you had to go to work..

eddie heard your car pull up, getting excited like a dog hearing its owner come home. he heard you come up to the door and open it rushing inside, as you basically clinged onto eddie. hearing him bark out a laugh as he hugged you.

" you have a good day sweetheart?" eddie asked, as you looked up at him " ive been needing you eds.. please." you quietly begged as you gave him the sweetest puppy eyes. seeing that shit eating smirk eddie always gave you when you were needy and begging for him.

" of course you need me.. come on princess.." he chuckled bringing you to the couch as you grew excited and wet.

he sat down as you had straddled onto his lap, kissing him right away. as he held your waist kissing your lips it was an innocent kiss.. until you both started to get more needy, using tongue and teeth in the kisses. hearing eddie softly moan into the kiss, your cunt getting wetter surely ruining your panties.

" on your knees baby.. be a good girl yeah.?" eddie spoke as you went onto your knees in front of eddie looking up at him with sweet glassy eyes, looking at him for consent as he nodded. your hands flew straight to his pants unbuckling them and unzipping it.

your mouth watered at the outline of his hard dick in his boxers, he lifted his hips up to have his boxers and jeans pulled down. his cock slapping up to his shirt, a bead of pre-cum staining eddies shirt.

you grabbed eddies dick at the base kissing the tip as he shuddered, eyes fluttering softly as you kissed from the tip to the base, and his balls. softly licking his balls as you slowly jerked off his cock.

as you lifted your head up taking eddies tip into your mouth sucking the tip and rubbing your tongue under his tip that made eddie let out a groan. his hand flying straight to your head pushing your head down slowly onto his cock.

Eddie leans his head back, eyes rolling onto the back of his head “Fuck sweetheart.. shit your doing so- mgh- so fucking good. You’ve been wanting to do this all day huh? Yeah? Fuck"

he grunted out as he moaned moving your head up and down on his cock, as you stroked what you couldnt reach. drooling down his dick to his balls.

" shhhiitt.. if you keep doing that im gonna- hah.. im gonna cum to fast. ah fuck your gonna make me cum!" he moaned as his grip in your hair was a bit painful, but made your panties wetter. you felt eddies cock go down your throat as you felt it twitch.

you lifted up your head breathing fast as you sucked eddies cock more, holding onto eddies thighs as they shivered and shook. hearing eddies whimpers and moans.

" oh sweetheart fuck.. oh my- mph!- shit.. im gonna cum soon.." he whimpered looking down at you with glassy lustful eyes. as you sucked his tip softly moaning against his tip as he cried out moaning. " fuck! oh my god.. dont stop dont fucking stop. your doing so.. so fucking good." he groaned.

you sucked on his tip more, softly humming around his tip as he let out a long groan. feeling his cum coat your throat, like honey coating your sore throat as you softly giggled. watching eddies chest rise and fall, as you slowly stroke his cock. getting every drop out as he pushed your hand away. " fuck that- that felt so good.. your such a good girl.." he sighed looking at you.

as you stuck your tongue out letting eddie see the cum pooling on your tongue as he groaned. " you little minx.." he mumbled as he held you close kissing you roughly. tasting himself on your tongue.

[mica949]

Baby Henry first gets his timeline powers

Warning for hospitals!!

Henry’s earliest memories were of being surrounded by white walls. 

A sickly child, always going in and out of the hospital as doctors frantically tried to treat something that could kill someone so small. He was too young back then to understand the concept of death, just knew that kids from his busy foster home would bring him get well soon cards and ask to take his things if he never came home.

It was incredibly boring. The only thing he could really do was watch the tv that flashed with radio static every few minutes. And sometimes Henry couldn’t help but wonder, if he never left this place, what would his life have been like? A few years with a foster family that never gave him the time of day, followed by years seeing the same scenery, taking painful experimental treatments and surgeries that he didn’t know would work?

More than ‘death’, that bugged him. The idea that he’d never amount to anything, never have anything that was truly his. He’d ‘die’ sad and alone, not even having a taste of life.

It was 9:23 when it happened. He was laying in bed, busying himself with trying to draw on some paper through all the IVs stuck in his hand, when he got a sudden, crushing pain in his chest. It overwhelmed him so entirely that he couldn’t think, couldn’t even try to scream. Small black spots filled his vision, and he briefly called out for help in a shrill voice before the blackness completely took over.

When he opened his eyes, the clock read 9:20.

It took Henry a second to gather himself from what he could only assume was a horrific dream. Was that what ‘death’ felt like? If so, he never wanted to feel it again.

As the noise of the clock ticking in a silent room filled his ears, he looked back to his piece of paper and was struck for a moment with the absurdity of it. He’d been drawing an elephant in his dream. And on the paper was an elephant too, though it was missing its legs. It must have made its way into his dreams… or something like that. Henry gently poked his chest a couple times, testing to make sure that nothing hurt. It didn’t hurt, but there was a certain tightness…

He went back to his paper. He could tell the nurse whenever it was time for an hourly checkup. As he added a tail to the elephant, he had a brief feeling of dread before the pressure burst into severe pain. 

Frick, his dream was coming true. He reached frantically for the button to call the nurse, as he struggled to breathe and things went black again. The clock seemed to taunt him, 9:23 again, several minutes before anyone would be coming. Small hands slammed into the side of the bed, trying with all their might as they shook. Despite how much he was trying, his body grew weaker and weaker until it all went dark.

Henry sat up in bed just a moment later, hand instinctively slamming the side of the bed full force. This time, his hand hit the call nurse button, he could hear the sound from down the hallway. 

It was 9:20, and there was a building pressure in his chest. 

By the time he was even close to calm, a nurse was beside him. She was his favorite nurse, sneaking him shiny coins and never dismissing how he felt.

“What’s wrong, Henry? Do you need to use the bathroom?”

He tried to slow his breathing. It was 9:21. 

Henry didn’t exactly feel up for talking, so he signed at her, “My chest hurts.”

She looked at one of the many displays that he didn’t know how to read. “Your heart is a bit fast… How about I go call one of the doctors and see if they can get you some medicine?”

He shook his head. It was 9:22. 

“Really hurts. Gonna die.” Death seemed so unclear just a moment ago, but now feeling how his very being had slipped away, he couldn’t stand the thought of being alone.

“Ok, ok, I’ll get someone else to call. You don’t need to worry. On a scale of 1-10, how bad is it?”

The clock’s second hand got closer and closer to the top, and despite it only being a 5 at most, Henry couldn’t stop shaking. He managed to hold up 5 fingers. “Hard to breathe.”

For once, he saw genuine worry on her face. That scared the boy even more than the ticking clock. “I’ll be right back, ok?”

He was about to sign a wish for her to stay, when it burst once again. It felt as though his ribs were cracking open, trying to escape his body. The nurse’s voice echoed in his ears, though he couldn’t hear what she was saying. Hands pressed on his hurting chest, but then everything went dark.

This time when he opened his eyes, it was 11:41. He felt groggier than ever, and his body was telling him he’d been hit by a car. 

“Thank goodness you’re alright.” 

As Henry’s vision focused, he realized quite a few people were standing over his hospital bed, including the kind nurse. His hands wouldn’t quite respond to his attempts to move them, so he reluctantly opened his mouth.

“What’s…?”

Voices rushed at him, saying a lot of words he couldn’t understand. He recognized something about side effects, and his heart, and that he was very lucky to be alive. He didn’t know how to say that, for a while, he was certain he was dead.

After asking a few questions, Henry was left alone again with the sound of the ticking clock.

How… odd.

[warwickroyals]

historically, have there been any (temporary, as sunderland hasn’t had a queen regnant) female heirs presumptive in the warwick family line? how would sunderland’s history have changed if they had become monarch instead? is there anyone else in the family, besides prince george, that was heir and never ascended? how would sunderland and the warwick family be different if george lived and became king instead of james?

These are excellent world-building questions, so let's take them one at a time:

Have there ever been female heirs presumptive in the Warwick family line?

Yes, twice. Princess Jaqueline was briefly heir presumptive between 1976 - 1977 before James's birth. This was the first such occurrence for the eldest daughter of a monarch. Before Jack's birth, Sunderland prohibited women from inheriting the throne, Parliament changed this to male-preference primogeniture, meaning that a daughter could inherit if she had no brothers.

The first time Sunderland ever had a female heir presumptive predated this law banning women from the throne. In the early 1860s, Sunderland was running out of male heirs, with many of them dying young. To make matters worse, King Louis IV, the sickly boy-king, was on his deathbed with no surviving brothers. However, Louis did have a daughter, Princess Louisa, from his marriage to Queen Rosalyn (mentioned here). Louis was determined to have his daughter succeed him and, months before his death, he named her his heir. This was unprecedented and very controversial in Sunderland, mainly because Queen Rosalyn, descended from wealthy plantation owners in the Antebellum South, was despised by Sunderland's largely pro-Union citizenship. Members of the royal family feared that, in the run-up to the American Civil War, Rosalyn would have too much influence over baby Louisa. To make a long story short, there was a constitutional crisis following Louis IV's death, and Rosalyn and Louisa were thrown out by Louis's cousin George, who would later become King George I. During the brief eight-month whirlwind between Louis's death and George's accession, Sunderland had no ruling monarch for the first time in its history.

However, many Sunderlandians were more sympathetic to the Confederate movement and recognized Louisa as Queen Louisa. Rosalyn and Louisa lived out the rest of their days in South Carolina, Louisa died childless in 1951, having spent her life resisting the efforts of her maternal relatives and Lost Cause proponents to install her as a glorified Dixieland Princess, a Varina Anne Davis of sorts. Sunderland's history would have been vastly different if she had been made Queen as an infant.

Is there anyone else in the family, besides prince george, that was heir and never ascended?

Yep, there have been several Princes of Danforth who died before becoming king. Princes James and George are also joined by their predecessors Prince Louis (1884 – 1902), who died during the reign of his grandfather, King George I as well as Prince Frederick (1806 – 1837), who died during the reign of his father King Louis III, his death is ultimately what led to Louis IV taking the throne.

How would Sunderland and the Warwick family be different if george lived and became king instead of James

It would be very different because our current King Louis and his family would only be a minor branch on the Warwick Family tree. George and Ruby had always wanted children and planned to start a family after WWII, so I assume if George wasn't killed in action, he and Ruby would have had a very large family, that pushed James further and from the throne. James II was a tyrant who resisted Sunderland's decolonization efforts with an iron fist, so, George being king instead probably would have been for the better, he did not share his brother's racist and imperialist views, in fact, he wanted to fight in the war because the viewed the spread of Nazism as a plague that needed to be eradicated.

Thanks for the ask <3

[k-ru-h]

theres something to be said about inherent human kindness and art and all that

i had an absolute trainwreck of a day and an hour long gap between classes, so i decided to plop by the local art store thats too far away from my home but maybe a 10min walk from school. they had really good prices and i wanted to buy the pretty pastel watercolors for myself and my friend, to make the day less miserable.

the storeworker, a kind-looking old man (surely at least in his 60s), picked up all the aquarelle boxes, saying he didnt want me, a seemingly abled person, to have to kneel on the floor to look at them. and he told me how he doesnt stock all the colors but he explained to me in detail, umprompted, how to order them for myself, with or without paying him. and he told me how hes owned this store for 28 years and hasnt changed locations (despite the location being horrible) because hes genuinely attached to this one. this shitty, tiny little hole in the wall place with no AC or even proper ventilation. and he started talking about his days as an artist, and all the incredible people he met, and how stores from the capital monopolizing certain brands ruined his once proud selection of products, and how to properly use watercolor paper, how to use distilled water and stick to one paper brand and how his personal dream is to get his hands on the aquarelles created only by and for that one russian college, and he treated me, a fucking infant baby child (18) whos been doing aquarelles for like two days (4 years) as a genuine peer and worthy conversation partner. and i almost started crying from the genuine love i felt for him.

and the day after, i got hungry between classes and decided to stop by the bakery. the bakery itself is overpriced - for the same price as other ones, you get maybe half the product. and its been closed for tax fraud maybe a month ago.

and this storeworker is an elder woman - not as old as the artist, but surely near or in her 50s - and she sometimes wears the bracelet i made her. the other students call her the "empress" of the store (named "empress"). she is the only reason i go there, and i only go when shes working the shift. at first it was because of the free food shed give us. shed always toss in a few cookies, she even remembered my favorite, and shed wish you a "royal" day (pun intended). soon, we started going there outside of the rush hours, and actually talking to her. her dream has always been to be an opera singer, but this is a poor country, and she has a sickly mother and a son who lives abroad to take care of. but she told us she found her fulfilment in work through the kindness she spread - not just the free food, but the compliments and kind words. and i almost cry every time i remember she didnt know she was so loved by the students. when i told her everybody only goes there for her, she actually didnt believe me, and when i noticed she dyed her hair (we now have similar haircolors!), she put it down and posed in front of the little hanging mirror with the biggest smile ive ever seen on her.

and i havent seen this person lately, im assuming because i havent been to one of the two places she frequents and she, probably, has, but theres this wonderful woman - i cant tell if shes old or worn down by hard work and stress - who always has the most vibrant, colorful jewelry and carries a little cardboard box.

and she approached me one day, i was going to meet up with some friends to talk about lord of the rings, and she stopped me to tell me how beautiful my hand made jewelry was. and she was holding a puppy under one arm, almost cartoonishly, and told me all about how she used to have a jewlery stand right here in this street. all of the money shes ever made shes invested in taking care of stray cats and dogs. even if it meant shed go hungry, she always made sure the animals she took care of were fed and warm and happy. but the stand was closed because of tax issues, and no cop was sympathetic towards the little kitten or puppy shed always take with her, so she was forced to make ends meet however she could and beg for money or pet food donations. and this wasnt her pressuring me for money - i hadnt even brought my wallet that day, i had my phone and some tea. this was her genuinely just wanting to stop and compliment me, and being delighted to have someone to talk to, and whenever i see people treat her like dirt i want to cry.

my point is, i met a painter and a singer and a craftsman, and all of them were the kindest people ive ever met. and i don't really look approachable, i usually only get hateful looks in public, but these three people, with far more experience than me, just genuinely wanted to talk about the things they cared about, and what they create, and i think creation makes you kinder. i think painting and singing and crafting, no matter if its a life long profession, a dream, or a failed venture, makes you more than the summ of all your parts. or something cringe like that idfk

[galpalaven]

i sure do love trying to heal my own perception of gaining weight by making some of my OCs either already chubby and happy about their looks or making gaining weight part of their healing process

like Penny has always been a big girl and god she has no plans to change that. she's sexy and confident and she can have anyone she wants and its not despite her weight it has nothing to do with it. she's attractive and she believes it with her whole chest

and then there's Jaxson, who was consistently in a normal weight range, only to come back to life from being literally dead to find eating difficult. those first few months she loses a lot of weight bc she's struggling to eat, and she looks sickly because of it. when she finally does start to gain weight, because Noah has found things she likes over time and works with her new avoidant and restrictive disordered eating, she feels upset about it because she thinks he'll stop liking her as much, but he is just like baby you don't understand seeing you filling out because of my food that ive made you is a sign that you are healthy and alive and thriving. i love you so much you are so beautiful please don't be self-conscious there is nothing to be self-conscious about you're stunning and i love you so much

Hawke also gains weight between Act 1 and Act 2 with the easy access to food. she isn't sure how to feel about it, and tries not to think about it, but Fenris thinks it's wonderful because she is so soft around the edges and she looks healthier and happier than she did when they first met. he likes that she's an armful. it makes him happy.

more and more i am trying to make bigger characters for my ships bc i am trying to retrain myself to like myself again and its hard but like. its also a lot of fun. i like the idea of gaining weight not as a 'symptom of depression/laziness/letting yourself go' but rather as a symptom of being in a safer, better place in your life. you have access to food that you enjoy and there is no scarcity. you're happy and you're healthy and you're moving forward and gaining weight is just an outward expression of it.

[rotten-artist]

recently lost another baby, Fluffy

heres some of my artwork following the deaths of my beloved little creatures and bit about them all

Sweetie passed in 2016, she was a little feral kitten my dad found abandoned in his truck, she was sickly and only lived for a few days after we got her, but Sweetie loved to be cuddled and to follow me around in the yard

Joan passed in 2018, he was not included in my latest drawing but he was still my lil boy, he had a best time running on his wheel and munching away on ham and berries. she loved to curl up in my hands and nap, and just loved to explore when he could

Lily passed in 2020 at the age of 12/13, my family got her in a walmart parking lot, where she was being given away. she was a nippy lil gremlin but loved all of us and wanted all the belly rubs you could give her. Lily just couldnt get enough of us, even in her last day

Sammy passed later in 2020 at 14, she was likely used as a dummy for fighting dogs as a pup, and had a massive scar that ran down her leg. despite that, Sammy grew into the biggest baby possible, she always wanted to give us hugs, even when she couldnt sit up to put her paws on our shoulders anymore. she was super protective of us all, even against her favorite vet when i was little

Violet passed in 2021 at 3, as a baby she liked to hide away and bite our fingers from the safety of her hammock, but after removing that hiding spot, she became a major cuddlebug. she loved to climb all over my girlfriend and i, and anything in her pen. when she couldnt hold her balance anymore, she still loved to be held, and was so sweet when she had to be syringe fed(?) her water

Betty passed in 2022 at 4, she was super sweet and loving as a little baby, and grew to have more of an attitude, but she stayed patient with me when i had to clean out her house and take care of her fleas. Ms B was strong until the end, and always kept her ‘tude

and finally, Fluffy. she passed away just yesterday, and was 7/8 years old. she never knew a stranger–if you werent a cat person, she made you one. she always wanted to be held and get pets, and had so much fun exploring our property. anywhere we went, she followed. when her (still living, thankfully) sister was hurt following a two week expedition without returning home, fluffy kept her cozy and made sure she was nice and clean.

all of my babies have been such big parts of my life, and im happy to have had the time ive gotten with them, and i miss them all dearly. i hope to see them again one day

[odetoagirl]

my mother always had this wonderful skill of making the world seem vicious and uninhabitable. naturally untalented, pathologically demanding and inherently perfectionistic, my mother worked incredibly hard and excelled to her own high standards in everything she put her hand to. under the impression that she could manifest anything she wanted for herself with a firm hand, she decided to have a baby, which unfortunately no one had told her would eventually turn into a person. for a little while she loved me, her incredible untitled project who could do the impossible, swiftly complete ventures she couldnt even comprehend, i was wonderful, and her controlling hands could exert their power on me as she increasingly lost her own autonomy. but as i grew,i grew down, i fell from those perceived heights and began to reflect my hostile surroundings. .

the irony of being smart is that we know best how much intelligence is always wasted on the intelligent. life, in its exceptionally simple beginnings, makes excellence exceedingly low effort and high reward, breeding lazy, egotistical creatures. thus, unbeknown to her for years, no effort was asked of me for years. incapable of evolution, as challenges beyond academia were asked of me it became apparent that totally unfledged my whole life, the ambitious willing muscle of my mother had atrophied and died within me, and consequently incapable of growth i had become paralysed as the world around me expanded and demanded of me, the sophisticated child who now fifteen years later could better be described as intelligent, but ultimately incapable. just as i had always been, i remained tearful, sickly and touch averse. entirely uncomfortable.

i spent my teenage years worrying about developing tourettes, i thought i just seemed like 'the type' for it. i thought that with such a rich inner world and so much to hide, misfourtune or irony would likely strike me with an inability to keep quiet at all to spite my growing shadow.

once i turned twenty, the fear transformed and i became fixated on an incoming schizophrenic break. regular peripheral glitches and the sounds of a ghost kettle became forewarning signals and taunts from my future. but i never broke, my eye sight just deteriorated and the distant whistles disappeared when the iron supplements began.

i had become a totally inactive agent within my own life, from an exacting mother who did almost everything for me, wrought with a perfectionism antithetical to children, and the reward of her scathing tongue when basic tasks were done well, but never done right, i learnt a helplessness and incapability of taking care of anything myself. contrary to common belief, perfectionistic parents do not often create ambitious children who cripple under the weight of their own inherited self imposed expectations, but rather most of us fall unheard of between the cracks, knowing that nothing we do will ever suffice, and that there is no prize on the other side of perfect. as disciplined as my mother was, i never knew anyone more wrought with misery and mediocrity. it seemed clear to me that one had two choices, work to exhaustion to no result, or do little at all to the same end. and where there was no reward for trying beyond risk of punishment, where avoidable, i escaped into fantasy.

so, utterly terrified in a world which seemed unrelenting, unrewarding and hostile, i have known myself only to be weak, impotent and now, utterly alone. i have frustrated everyone who has tried to help me, everyone who insists i have control and ability runs into dead ends in my conversation. so ingrained, i see a world of people with only a perceived power, it is paralysing and unlivable to realise your own lack of agency, people have invented jobs and hobbies and gods to fill the space, but the hardest working women ive ever known worked until death, towards a shimmery mirage of happiness they never achieved, with no money or legacy, unable to outrun where they started, maintaining only the illusion of progress by never looking over their shoulder.

[garoujo]

・✶ ｡ﾟ your step brother kazutora just wants to see how it feels, it’s not his fault you’re luring him in.

♱ warnings — stepcest, dubcon, f!reader, sort of manipulation / gaslighting, pussy jobs that lead to more, ive not been able to stop thinking about this all day i’m sorry >///<

it wasn’t that your step brother kazutora was creepy, not at all. he was sweet, polite and he was always a little protective of you — like he fell into the role of being your big brother naturally despite you both not being blood related, and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t feel nice at least.

but there was just some things that were a little… off. you could always feel his eyes on you, everytime you entered a room until the moment you left — you could feel the way his gold gaze narrowed in on you, watching your every move like he was a lion on the hunt, and the sort of look alone made something cold shoot through your spine, especially when he’d shoot you a sort of sickly sweet grin whenever you met it.

kazutora had always been a little touchy too, his skin always seeming to graze or linger against yours even in the moments where you think the touch could’ve been avoided, and it always made you shiver when he’d deliberately reach for things over you — pressing his body tight against your own as he breathed soft against the crook of your neck.

but despite all of this, he still cared for you despite being a little fragile himself, he still came back to you after juvie like he’d never left and maybe that’s why you feel like you’re treading on egg shells a little whenever he’s around, not wanting to hurt his feelings after everything he’s been through.

so it was much easier for you to fall into the role of being his sweet little sister, to ignore the way the hairs on the back of your neck seemed to stand up whenever he was around you, always close and watching.

but lions do tend to stalk their pray before they attack.

“just wanna see how it feels, baby. you want this too, don’t you? can tell.” kazutora drawls and his tone drips through you like honey when he rocks his cock against your glistening cunt, sighing when he watches you bite on your lower lip to muffle the needy whimper that threatens to break from them.

you should’ve stopped him before it got this far, but he was so gentle when he’d asked if he could rub and hump against your pussy, insisting it would make him feel better to have you so close, before you ended up stripped of your layers and suddenly his hard cock was being smeared in your slick.

“stop—n-no, we shouldn’t tora..” you gasp but it breaks off into a sound that’s a little weaker, whispery when your step brother takes a slow handful of your tits before he’s rolling your nipple between his fingers. he’s flushed from his cheeks to his chest, and he sends you a sweet smile that seems misplaced with the way he’s grinding his cock along your folds.

“but your pussy‘s saying different, you’re so wet for your big brother.. makes me so fucking happy.” kazutora giggles after followed by another languid roll of his cock along your folds, deliberately catching it under the hood of your clit before he’s laughing again when your thighs twitch around him.

your body feels like it’s betraying you with every saccharine rub of his cock along your pussy, your slick only intensifying and smearing along the sensitive shaft as his tongue peeks out to wet his lips before he’s looking over you, long and shameless, and in a way that almost makes your stomach turn with both desire and a little unease.

“tora.. but ‘m your sister.” you try to say, but it’s breathless and barely audible when he leans over to close his lips around your tits, suckling and rolling his tongue along the perky buds before he’s groaning against your skin, the same predatory gaze blinking up at you and you feel something icky turn in your stomach at the look.

“yeah, so you’re mine. jus’ gonna put in the tip, baby — knew you’d feel so good, need a lil more.” kazutora smiles, his voice a hum that’s a little too bright for the situation and he doesn’t even wait for your reply before he’s sinking into you, he knows you wouldn’t say no.. you wouldn’t wanna hurt his feelings, right?

“b-but, we’re not—ah!” you whine, the fat head of his cock stings a little but you’re so fucking wet and you can’t help how good he feels, your thighs instinctively squeezing around his hips when he pulls away from your tits to blink up at you before he’s rolling his hips once more.

“does it feel good? feels like you like it, you’re pullin’ me in. do you like your big brothers cock, baby?” kazutora asks, and his soft laugh that rings sweetly after is almost comforting despite the way his cock is suddenly splitting you open, but it’s still misplaced when it’s falling from the predatory curl of his lips.

“y-yes, feels good, tora! but ‘ts too much, you said—“ your words are weak, barely audible from the way they’re babbled through your pouty lips and he thinks you look so fucking pretty like this, he knew his pretty little sister would look so good on the end of his cock — that’s why he’s waited and waited, for you.

“you keep suckin’ me in, ‘ts not my fault you’re teasing me — quit squeezing so tight.” kazutora teases as he presses his chest against yours, feeling his palm rest against your cheek before he’s kissing you and swallowing your mindless sounds at the first real, deep press of his cock into your cunt. you feel him grunt when he presses his tongue between your lips to suck on your own and you squeeze around him in response, letting your fingers twist in the dyed hair that frames his flushed features.

it takes a few seconds, but he moans when you kiss back and he’s finding a pace, and the way he’s easily grinding his cock along the sensitive spots inside of you makes you believe he really was made for you like he would always say, feeling dizzy against the spin of the room when he pulls away to mouth and kiss along your neck instead.

“i want it, tora—please, more!” you whine, your voice lilting higher in pitch when the strength behind kazutora’s thrusts grow along with it, and you feel his lips curl into another smile against your skin as his hands squeeze and worship along the rest of your body.

“you’re gonna make m-me cum, baby. but you’re so pretty for such a sick lil thing, you know i love it.”

© 2022 garoujo. please do not copy any of my layouts or writing and translate or repost onto any other sites.

[babeyvenus]

Wakanda's Princess

Nakia's pregnant with T'Challa's daughter. What will these two do with the new princess?

Chapter 1: Too Soon

This can't be happening…

Nakia looked down at her stomach and into the toilet. It's too soon.

She sat on the floor, distraught and anxious. She dreamed of this day before, but it was soon. Too soon.

She didn't know who to go to, in fear of the news getting out. But chose to go to the scientific princess.

Nakia walked in, dizzy from her morning sickness and saw Shuri working on some shoes. She looked around for her lover before making her way over to his sister.

"Shuri…I need help.", she whispered.

"What is it now? Did you break something?", the princess asked, not looking at her.

'Not yet….', Nakia thought.

"No. I just….I'm scared.", Nakia said instead.

Shuri finally turned around, taking in her friend's sickly state. "Whoa, what happened to you?", she asked.

"That's what I wanna know.", Nakia said, sitting in a chair.

She stared at the woman for a while. "You're pregnant, aren't you?", she asked.

Nakia's eyes widened as she hushed her. "Not so loud!", she whispered-yelled.

Shuri gasped. "So you are.", she said.

"I guess so. I didn't pay any mind to it until now.", Nakia said, looking down disappointed in herself. Shuri was the complete opposite. "I'm gonna be an auntie.", she said smiling.

In a way, Nakia felt relieved that Shuri wasn't upset. "Will you please check…?", she asked, unsure.

Shuri prepared her nanos as a bed and had Nakia lay on them.

"This might tickle.", she said.

"I'm not worried about tickles.", Nakia said, looking at her stomach.

Shuri hooked up an IV on Nakia, made her do some urine tests and waited.

"Yup. You came to me right on time.", she said, finally getting the results.

Nakia frowned. It's not like she didn't want to have the baby. She would've been ecstatic if they had talked about it. However…

He's going to be King soon….

"If you're worried about T'Challa, there's nothing to be worried about. Geez, you two always act like I don't have time on my hands. I'm here to help both of you.", Shuri said, reassuring Nakia.

Nakia smiled sadly. "Thank you.

"Shuri, do you have my device ready??", a familiar voice boomed in a short distance, making Nakia's eyes widen.

"Oh no…I don't want him to find out now. Put it away! Put it away!", she whispered, hearing his footsteps.

Shuri hurried with everything and got out his device she had been working on.

"It's here, brother. Ready to go.", she said, once T'challa came in. The older brother smiled and took it from her. "Thank you.", he said and turned to his lover, unaware of her nervousness. "Good morning, my love.", he said, coming over to Nakia and kissed her on her forehead before he left.

The women sighed in relief. "That was close.", Nakia said.

"Too close.", Shuri agreed. "So how long are you planning on keeping it from him….?", she asked.

"For as long as I can. I don't want to stress him out as much as he is now.", Nakia said.

"So how long do you think you'll be able to hide such a thing? You're going to swell a couple of months.", Shuri informed.

Nakia knew that. Though, she had a place to hide whenever her stomach would grow. She informed Shuri of such a place and decided that's where she'll stay.

She only hoped that T'Challa wouldn't miss her so much until it was time.

Months passed and it was finally time for Nakia to birth her child. It was a baby girl and instantly she knew the familiar genetic features of her lover.

"She's beautiful.", Shuri whispered, laying the infant child in Nakia's arms. Nakia cried, both out of happiness and despair. She had to cut all ties off from the Dora Milaje and could only give little information to the queen in fear of T'challa ever finding out.

Nakia decided it was too much. She couldn't let T'Challa know. Nakia let the women of a nearby village watch over her daughter before making herself known to her lover who welcomed her back, confused, worried and relieved that she was okay.

14 years had passed and T'Challa had yet to find out. By then, it was too late to go back. Nakia realized it would only make things worse if he had found out this late.

Instead T'Challa was with his father inside Vienna.

He huffed, tugging at his collar around his neck and looked at his father. "It's chafing.", he complained, making his father smile in amusement.

"Bear with it for now. We'll be gone soon.", he said.

The prince huffed and looked out the window.

"At a special United Nations conference 117 countries have come together to ratify the Sokovia Accords.", he heard and glanced at a red haired woman.

"Excuse me, Miss Romanoff?", a woman walks up to a red haired woman. "Yes?", she responds.

"These need your signature.", she said.

T'Challa watched as she signed a form and let the woman leave, finally recognizing her.

"I suppose neither of us is used to the spotlight.", T'Challa spoke up.

She turns to him. "Oh, well, it's not always so flattering.", she says.

"You seem to be doing alright so far. Considering your last trip to Capitol Hill… I wouldn't think you would be particularly comfortable in this company.", he says.

"Well, I'm not.", she says with a frown.

"That alone makes me glad you're here, Miss Romanoff.", T'Challa says genuinely.

"Why? You don't approve of all this?", she asks.

"The Accords, yes. The politics, not really. Two people in a room can get more done than a hundred.", he said.

"Unless you need to move a piano.", king T'Chaka says, walking up to them.

"Father.", the prince greets.

"Son. Miss Romanoff.", The king nodded to them.

"King T'Chaka. Please, allow me to apologize for what happened in Nigeria.", she apologizes, bowing.

"Thank you. Thank you for agreeing to all this. I'm sad to hear that Captain Rogers will not be joining us today.", he says.

"Yes, so am I.", she says and T'Challa smiles.

"If everyone could please be seated. This assembly is now in session.", they hear on the PA.

"That is the future calling. Such a pleasure.", T'Challa said, bowing to her.

"Thank you.", she says and leaves.

"For a man who disapproves of diplomacy, you're getting quite good at it.", his father says.

"I'm happy, baba.", he said, smiling.

The men give their affection before the king walks up to the podium for his speech.

"When stolen Wakandan vibranium was used to make a terrible weapon, we in Wakanda were forced to question our legacy. Those men and women killed in Nigeria, were part of a goodwill mission from a country too long in the shadows. We will not, however, let misfortune drive us back. We will fight to improve the world we wish to join. I am grateful to the Avengers for supporting this initiative."

As T'Challa listens to his father, his peripheral vision catches something outside the building. His eyes widened before turning back to his father. "Wakanda is proud to extend its hand in peace.", his father's last words were.

"EVERYBODY GET DOWN!", T'Challa yelled and ran for his father, but was too late and got blown away.

As the explosion cleared, T'Challa crawled on the floor in search of his father and found his limp body.

"Baba…. Baba!" The prince checked for a pulse but there was nothing…

He's dead….

"No….no….!!", T'Challa cried, cradling his father's lifeless body.

Unfortunately the news spread quickly back to Wakanda where Nakia was waiting for T'Challa. She felt regretful as she watched her daughter walk amongst the women in the village she stayed in.

She turned to the sound of footsteps and saw Shuri walk up to her in tears.

"Shuri…what's wrong….?", she asked, worriedly.

Shuri hugs her tight and bawls. The women rocked, Nakia confused and let Shuri settle down.

"Shuri, won't you tell me what happened?", Nakia asked.

"He's dead….my father. He's dead…", she whispers. Nakia's eyes widened and glossed over.

T'Chaka….dead….? Where's T'Challa…? What happened and how….? Why…?

"We have to go bury him….", Shuri says, getting up and looking at her niece.

"She wasn't even able to have the chance to know her grandfather….", she says.

Nakia glances at her daughter.

She's right. And it wasn't fair. What did he do to deserve his death….?

"T'Challa's in so much pain right now. He's the one that was there.", she said.

That only made Nakia's despair worsen. She didn't want to pile on more bad news.

Unfortunately, that didn't last. It had been months, and she was getting too big to hide for long.

After T'Challa returned to Wakanda after settling with the Avengers and delivering Xeno to justice, Nakia sought out for T'Challa, finally deciding to let him meet his child. The look on his face after seeing him made her want to change her mind. He looked so tired but happy to see her.

As they met up, he felt a bit relieved to see her but could tell something was off. She seemed... Nervous. "There's something I have to tell you.", she told him. Many outcomes entered his mind in an instant. She either found another love, was in trouble with someone or wanted him back.

He'd have to mentally prepare for one of those responses, but was not prepared for her to take him into the farther fields outside of the golden palace where animals grazed and their caretakers watched over them.

Nakia's eyes laid on a girl who was petting a rhino and T'Challa followed her line of sight. He looked at her in confusion at the girl. Nakia took a breath and called out for the girl who turned to them, a look of distain appearing on her face for a moment before she got a good look of the prince before her and she immediately straightened up.

T'Challa's eyebrow raised at the girl as she walked up to them and he looked at Nakia who appeared a little more distressed. The girl stepped up to them and bowed a bit. "My prince.", she greeted.

T'Challa shook his head. "No need for that." She looked up in confusion. "Am I needed?", she asked him and he looked at her with furrowed eyebrows as he took in her features. She looked no older than 14 or 15.

He looked back at Nakia who looked at him with glossed eyes. "T'Challa, this is T'Kia.", she introduced. His eyes widened as he realized why the woman was so off-putting today. He looked between the girl and the woman. "Is she... Did we...–?", he started.

Nakia nods, silently, watching the prince's eyes become glossy. T'Challa looks at the girl. "She's your daughter.", Nakia says, shocking the girl.

T'Kia looked between the two in disbelief before she stared at T'Challa who stared back. He had so many questions. Why was he just now finding out about this...? Why did it take so long? Did she resent him?

He couldn't stand the girl's confused and teary eyes. He looked at her for another long moment, trying to take her in. He felt a sense of regret and shame for missing out on so many years.

Then he reached out and pulled TKia close. "Are you angry with me...?", he asked, softly.

Her eyes bubbled with tears instead, feeling warm inside. This was what she was missing all these years. Not knowing what a father was like... Not knowing what it was like to have him around.

She shook her head silently, hugging him back.

The prince embraced her in his arms, his face now buried in her hair. Even though she was his own flesh and blood, he had never held his own child before.

He never even saw her birth. He missed out on her first steps, her first words, her first birthday.

All the guilt and regret hit him at once and he only squeezed her harder.

The sounds of her sniffles made his heart clench painfully. "Baba...", she sobbed, nuzzling her face in his chest, grasping at his clothes as if he'd disappear. The prince shook his head, and stroked her hair as he shushed her. "Baba is here now. Baba's not going anywhere.", he cooed softly.

He looked over to Nakia, who had tears in her eyes too. He could see the guilt in hers. Her sorrow for keeping their child from him, her tears not just of joy, but also of regret.

[mariahisthewalkingdead]

maggie defense <3 (I'M NOT SORRY)

i hope after this finale that certain people can finally let go of being absolutely OBSESSED with maggie forgiving negan. ive always found that to be so incredibly disrespectful. every single point you can make to claim she's in the wrong can easily be rebutted by the fact that because of negan, glenn would never see his son. and by the fact that when she was sickly pregnant to the point of being carried on a cot, she was forced onto her knees by a man who would bash her baby's father's face in front of her and make fun of him while he did it. and by the fact that he didn't understand how she felt until he was in a "similar situation". it still irks me that he had the nerve to call his case (where he decided to sacrifice himself BY CHOICE) in any way "the same". he has known his wife for just a few months. and it took him being brought to his own knees to really understand what she felt? not to mention he'd lost his first wife before. there's no way he didn't know. he didn't feel even a third of what he put these people through. it should be more than enough for the rest of the group to like him, so why is almost everyone in the fandom so irritated by her choosing not to let it go? i think negan was a big baby for continuing to bother her with puppy dog eyes in the first place, but i'm especially annoyed with the fans who feel this way, because how could you? after knowing glenn all those years, i don't care how much time passed. we could've given the governor time to learn from his mistakes too, but that would still never erase what he did to hershel. " well, if it wasn't glenn, it would've been somebody else!!" and what makes you think that makes any sort of a difference? it also could've been carl. or daryl. do you think either of those deaths would have gone over smoothly or been forgiven? i would still feel this way. the people who were affected by it the most deserve to take as much time as they deem necessary to mourn. last time i checked this was called human decency, not rocket science. at the same time i feel this way, i also pity him. because he will never meet glenn and fully understand what he took from everyone. and he'll never know what he's missing by not knowing glenn. i love the person negan has become, but there's a fine line between us, the viewers, and a character like maggie who was directly impacted by his decision to do what he did. there was no way she was ever going to fully forgive him. it was sick of anyone to expect her to. and i ask you this... if the roles were flipped and it was maggie who was killed by negan, would ANYONE be annoyed by glenn's blame? would anyone be pressuring him to forgive? i really, HONESTLY don't think so. negan went through his own redemption arc, sure, but it had nothing to do with maggie and hershel. and on top of that, she wasn't even there to see it. why should his few good actions justify what he did? he's always gonna be that person to her, and that's to be expected. and btw, this is coming from me, a person who adores negan and jdm. please kindly separate your personal experiences from the way a show runs. i guarantee you'd be far worse than maggie if this had happened to you.

[saccharine-suffering]

Naomi & Issac - 1

Remember these guys? Well I fleshed those suckers out. Prepare for suffering y'all.

CW: Pet whump, vampires, death mention, a lot of blood mentions, whumpee thinks caretaker is their new master

1.3k (though the first ~500 words are just me talking about my modern vampire lore)

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Naomi had been pacing for hours trying to rationalize what she did. ‘This is the best option,’ They told themself, “At least this way, I can make sure I’m getting blood ethically. No one has to die.’ They knew they had to drink something. When she first turned, she was quick to dress like the vampire she was and cut their hair to show off their bite. She loved the idea of being dark and mysterious, living as a cryptid- a beast. It sounds strange, but a part of her was excited to start living a vampiric life- well, maybe “life” isn’t quite right. 

Then came the fading from mirrors and nausea from eating anything at all. Having to blow eighteen-hundred bucks on a casket was a bit of a gut punch. As were the several blackout curtains they needed to avoid third-degree sunburns. It was annoying to have to sell her silver jewelry and even more so to break out in hives when even slightly near a single fucking garlic clove–

But they could deal with all that. They could bite the bullet in exchange for immortality. 

No one told Naomi that blood cravings were the very last step in turning. 

Just when they had gotten used to waking up a 8pm in a box, right as they had grown accustomed to guessing what their hair and makeup might look like, exactly when the worst of it seemed to be over, there was this pit in their stomach. They were so thirsty. Before resorting to humans, they tried draining raw meat. Nothing. Then a live pig. It didn’t do much. They knew this would happen, of course it would, but they hadn’t expected it to be this painful, and they definitely didn’t know the blood had to be human. 

So, they researched how to get human blood. And sure, you can buy a little legally from donors, but it was so far outside their budget that is was barely even an option. But the cheaper alternatives, aimed at vampires specifically, seemed so needlessly cruel. For every new company she could find, she asked how they supplied their blood. The response was always the same. Humans would be hooked up to IVs, blood coming out of one, and saline coming in from the other. Sometimes they ere given solid food, but at most places, they used a feeding tube. Naomi almost quit, residing themself to finding and extra $700 for 100 tiny milliliters- but then they saw one more hyperlink. 

“Stop paying for subscriptions! Buy a living Bloodbag today!” Exactly as she thought, they were selling humans. She was disgusted at first, but, then she thought about it more. These people were being drained of their blood anyway, so if she buys one, at least they’ll be treated humanely? Maybe it was the thirst talking for them, but they decided to purchase a person. 

They couldn’t afford another massive dent in their bank account, so they scrolled all the way down to the cheapest one. A twenty-seven year old man named Issac Rivera, blood type O+. That, and his picture, was the only information available. He was pale and sickly with blue eyes and tangled brown hair. He had blue eyes and it looked like he had finished crying moments before the photo was taken. Naomi hoped they were making the right choice. 

Which is what landed them here. Waiting for the poor boy to be delivered straight to their door. She had tried to make herself look nonthreatening. She didn’t want to scare him. They wore the mast casual and normal clothes in their dresser and pulled their hair into a little baby ponytail. 

A knock on the door.

It was an older looking man dressed in all black and carrying a parasol in one hand and a rolling suitcase in the other. Oh gods. 

“Naomi Castillo?” He asked. 

“That’s me.” They smiled. Their eyes wouldn’t leave the suitcase, since they were fairly certain that there was a person in there. He handed it over and she felt him kick. 

“If you ever need training or extraction tools, they are available on our site.” It keeps getting worse. 

“Of course, thank you.” Naomi hoped their smile looked real. The man walked away and she quickly unzipped the case. 

~

Issac had been sold. He never thought it would happen. He had occasionally been compared to cheap box wine. Perhaps the vampire that bought him wanted something quick and inexpensive. The conversation between his captor and his new owner was muffled, but he felt the case he was in change hands. He instinctively covered the arteries on his neck. She was saying something, but he wasn’t listening. He knew exactly what would happen- she would rip his hand from him neck and drain what little he had left. 

A hand touched his, and he braced for impact. But, he was being led away. Before he could question it, he was sat down on something soft. He hadn’t opened his eyes yet and he wasn’t planning on it. Next thing he knew, something cold was against his lips. Taking just a small peek, it was a water bottle. He shouldn’t trust it, but his mouth was so dry that he just let it go down his throat. 

After the bottle pulled away, he waited for the pain of the bite. He waited and waited, but nothing came. Eventually, he opened his eyes and looked at the vampire next to him, as if he was asking her what she was waiting for. But they just smiled at him. 

“Can you speak?” That wasn’t expected. He used to get told off for talking to himself. 

“Yeah…” His voice was raspy. They handed him back the bottle. 

“Okay, great, um, I’m Naomi!” They gestured to themself. Issac was going to introduce himself, but they already would have known. “Are you hungry?” Naomi arose from the sofa when he nodded, “I don’t have much, I got rid of most of the perishable stuff when I turned. Do you want… dry cereal? I can maybe put it in water- no that sounds gross.” Issac accidentally gave her a look. She was different from the other vampires he had the displeasure of knowing. A bit more dazed and certainly less elegant. 

“Just… dry is fine.” He said. He had no reason to trust them, but he hadn’t had real, solid food in such a long time that if she was planning on drugging him, then he could live with that. He ate in completely awkward silence as Naomi tired not to make eye contact. Internally, Issac was panicking. Yes, he had been trained just in case he was sold, but he hadn’t been for such a long time that he barely even remembered it. Hopefully it would come rushing back to him when he was properly fed and rested. 

“Uh, I put a mattress in a spare room. Do you wanna go to bed?” It’s like they read his mind. Can vampires read minds? He didn’t know. He was tired. He nodded. 

She led him away gently, and closed the door, leaving him alone in the makeshift bedroom. He didn’t have the energy to consider what was going to happen to him. Naomi was weird. Maybe it wasn’t even real. He’s had these kind of dreams before. Maybe when he wakes up he’ll be back in the facility with needles in his arms and a tube down his nose. Or maybe he’ll wake up here and she’ll peirce him with her fangs. He always wondered what a real bite would feel like. It would probably hurt worse than the needle. 

Whatever. He could worry about that when he can keep his eyes open. 

[mer-se]

when I’m passionate about something holy shit am I passionate. I’d find a way to walk thru lava to make it happen. I hope by this time next year my life is completely different for the better..✨

[mysticalrambling]

Love Eventually Wins (A.B) Part 2

(Part 1)

Andy Barber Fanfiction (Fanfiction Master List)

Warnings: Angst but eventual fluff.

Summary: dad! Andy Barber x female reader. You juggle in the hospital between your dad and your son. You haven't forgiven Andy for what he said to you but you guys talk it out in the end and it's all eventual fluff.

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“Dad, you are going to be fine. We are all going to wait for you after the surgery.” Gently kissing your father on your head, you held back your tears because you didn’t want him to back down from his decision. You just prayed to God that this operation would be successful because you had already lost your mother to a car accident when you were four, so it was just you, Julie and your dad. You could not afford to lose another family member and you wanted Gabriel to know his grandfather when he grows up.

“Okay, sweetie. Will see you after.” He looked so pale and sickly just lying on that uncomfortable hospital bed. Silently kissing him on the forehead, the nurses took him away to the operation theatre.

When you got out of the room, your little sister immediately took you in a bone crushing hug and started sobbing uncontrollably. “It’s all going to be okay, Julie.” You tried to console her but there wasn’t much you could say to convince her when you yourself were worried.

After about half an hour, you finally got her to quiet down and then went to check up on your son in the pediatric ward. The receptionist pointed you towards a NICU ward that kept babies from the age of six months to two years and you didn’t know why he was admitted in to the hospital so you internally freaked out on the way there.

“Hi. The doctor said that Gabriel had some kind of stomach infection so they will have him on IV drips and antibiotics for two days.” Andy explained it to you as soon as you entered the room and went to your son’s crib. He was in the crib in a small hospital gown and God, you hated this sight. Touching his forehead, you realised that his temperature was higher than when it was at home.

“His fever is way too high right now.” Looking at your husband, you felt so helpless because your father and your son were sick and you didn’t know what to do.

“The doc said that it will return back to normal in no time.” Andy was observing you from the moment you entered the hospital room. Puffy eyes, rosy cheeks and a tear stained face was a completely new look for you. He wanted to be there for you but he knew that you had still not forgiven him. It was not easy to forget the things that he said, even if he didn’t mean it.

“Oh okay. I am just going to sit here with him.”

“I will bring you some coffee because you haven’t eaten since morning.”

“Non-”

“Non filtered, without sugar. I know.” He lightly kissed you on the forehead but was slightly hurt when you didn’t give him a smile like you always did. He could feel a wall separating the two of you and the only thing that he wants is to tear that wall down. Why could he not keep his mouth shut and let you talk? Everything would have been alright then.

“Hey, baby. I need you to be fine really fast, okay. Mommy needs you to get through all of this and I love you so much.” Gripping on to his little hand, you gently rest your head against the crib. The nurse came after sometime and you asked her is she could stay with Gabriel for sometime. Everything was too much for you and you just needed to vent it all out in private.

“Hi. Where is my wife?”

“She said she needed some fresh air.”

“Okay, I am just leaving the coffee here. You are going to stay with him, right?”

You were just looking at the stars and remembering the time when you spent countless college nights with Andy on the rooftop, just staring at the stars. It quickly became your thing and now you were sitting here all alone. A few tears escaped you when you remembered all the things that your husband said. It was still too much to comprehend.

“Please, don’t cry. I am truly sorry for all the things that I said.” Sitting next to you on the bench, he didn’t have the power to look you in the eyes. He was too embarrassed. It was his job to let no harm come to you but now he was the one who is causing the harm. He just wanted someone to beat the crap out of him and punish him for making you feel unworthy.

“I know you said that you didn’t mean a word of it but I know that’s not true. I know you better than you know yourself.” You looked at him from under your eyelashes and saw a look of realisation cross his face. Andy thought that he could just hide it from you because of all the things that you have been going through. He sometimes did forget that if he could easily read you then you could do the same.

“So the district attorney has been telling me that I am not doing my job properly because I am a family man now. I am too distracted on my job and the last case, the witness didn’t show up and Jacqueline just laid it out on me. She even gave my next big case to Carter and I just lost it on you. I am so sorry.”

Tears welled up in his eyes when he realised how innocent you were in this whole situation and he had no right to make you feel so bad about yourself. He didn’t dare move his face away from the stars and you knew the guilt was eating him up inside.

“Hey, look at me.” Gently placing your hands on his bearded face, you made him look at you. “I was being genuine when I said that you can take a break from us. I won’t mind.”

“No, I don’t. It was all said out in anger and you don’t know how sorry I am. Please don’t think like that because you are my whole world.” His heart was tearing up in pieces and you were the only one who could fix it.

“Okay but what about Jacqueline then?”

“I will take care of her. She can not just assume that I would be the same Andy after having my own family to look out for. You don’t worry about anything.”

“Okay.” Kissing him under the stars was your favorite pass time and you wouldn’t change it for the world. “Let’s go check up on our baby right now.”

“No, you go to your sister because your dad is going to be out of surgery in sometime and you should be with her. I will check on Gabriel and then come to you.”

“Let’s check on Gabe together because I won’t stop worrying until then. God, I just want this day to end already.” Hand in hand, you got up from the bench and went to meet your son.

Gabriel was slightly waking up by the time you entered his room and you immediately went to pick him up. Keeping in mind to not touch his iv drip, you cradled him to your chest. Your heart ached for your baby boy because he was always the one to cause trouble and never sit still in one place. “Mommy, hurts.” A whimper escaped him and he clutched on to your shirt with his tiny fists.

“It’s going to be okay.” He looked so small in your arms and you were barely holding yourself together because you didn’t want your son to cry after seeing you.

“Give him to me.” Andy carefully took him from you and tried rocking him back to sleep. By now, he was full on crying and trying to take his bandage off. Your husband took Gabriel’s hand in his hold but the kid did not quiet down for one second. You tried to give him his lion pacifier and he just turned his head the other way round. The doctor came in when he heard the commotion and quickly inserted some sedatives in to his IV drips.

He told you both that Gabriel would be alright in a few days and he will stay with him so that you both can go check up on your father. Gabriel was going to sleep for some hours so it was okay for you guys to stay with your dad until then.

“The doctor said that the surgery went well and we can see him after they transfer him to ICU.” Your sister filled you in as soon as she saw you both walking down the corridor. Ecstatic, you hugged Andy tightly and believed for the first time in all night that everything is going to be okay.

“I love you.” You whispered affectionately in to his ears.

“I love you too.” Kissing you softly, he tried to express his love with his actions.

Hope you guys enjoyed it!!

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A/N: Here's part 2. I loved watching Defending Jacob so I came up with this plot. Andy Barber has my whole heart and I hope you guys liked it. Tell me what you think and message me if you want to be added to the tag list.

Like, comment and reblog.

Tag list: @kalopsia-flaneur, @fantasywriter104, @justile

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