#AND these are among the first humanoid creatures i drew with a lot of effort

[misterewrites]

Unlikely Allies (Welcome to the Underground

Hey everyone! E here hoping you are all safe and sound. Sorry for the delay. The original plan was for me to update every two week because of my various responsibilities but a lot of things ended up happening so I had to delay this chapter a bit. Also there has been a shift in my job that might affect the release date of this chapters as well so hopefully I can keep up the whole two week deadline but as a word of warning delays might happen.

Thank you for reading this project of mine. I really appreciate it and I am so glad it's doing so well. Feel free to Reblog, share, comment all that jazz I love reading them and remember this story is also on Ao3. Stay safe, wear your mask, wash your hands and take care of yourself and your love ones! Have a great week! E is out!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27814297/chapters/71425041

Story so far: One day into the Underground proper and Abigail has already been chased by strange creatures into an unexplored tunnel and a creepy house that screams trouble. Trapped within, the group runs into a paladin wandering the darken halls. Despite the stranger's calm demeaner, Oliver claims he's nothing but trouble and little does the group know how correct he is. 

_____

“No by the way” Oliver narrowed his eyes at the man before the trio.

The stranger tilted his head quizzically “No?”

“No” Oliver repeated firmly “We’re not interested in your righteous cause or your god.

The stranger chuckled darkly “What righteous cause?”

“You’re a paladin in an evil creepy house in an unexplored tunnel off the beaten path.” Oliver explained “That only means one thing: Trouble. Solius I take with the whole…”

He gestured to the faded sun symbol splashed across the dented armor.

“Aye” The paladin answered with a nod “I am Fen, judgment of the sun god Solius on this mortal plane.”

Oliver raised an eyebrow sarcastically “Solius is the god of sunshine, rainbows and redemption. I wasn’t aware of he added judgment to his resume.”

“He hasn’t” Abigail mumbled.

Neither Oliver or Fen paid her any attention.

“Your mocking is common among the faithless” Fen growled softly.

Oliver gave a noncommittal shrug “If you want to believe in a higher being in exchange for some magical whatevers, that’s a you problem. I’m good with my music.”

“Bards” Fen spat out distastefully.

“Paladorks.” Oliver replied with false civility.

Abigail and Archibald watched the barbed exchange carefully, unsure what exactly was going on.

Abigail’s knowledge of paladins was sketchy at best: Like clerics, she knew their drew their magic from the deity they have chosen to follow. Good and bad gods existed in equal measure in this world and each ruling a domain such as light, dark, night, murder, redemption. Unlike the clerics, who often were healers or at the very least practitioners of powerful magics, paladins were their god’s warrior on the mortal plane, protecting their flock or routing out their enemies with religious fervor and steel.

Abigail was only familiar with Solius due to her family’s livelihood. While not particularly devoted to the sun god, her parents often left offerings in his church in the town to help ensure a good harvest for the year.

Speaking honestly, Abigail was never sure how exactly clerics and paladins drew their magic from a god or how exactly gods worked. She had heard the elders endlessly argue whether the gods were divine or simply higher beings who were beyond the comprehension of mortal beings. It was frankly above her thought process and she rather focus on questions she could answer such as what she was going to eat that day and if the bloodblooms needed more or less water.

“So.” Oliver began tiredly “How much danger are we in?”

Abigail and Archibald shared a concern glance

“I’m sorry, did you just say we’re in danger?”

“Yes” Fen answered bluntly “Much danger.”

“Much danger?” Abigail couldn’t keep stop her pitch from rising “Danger!?”

Oliver gestured to Fen “Of course we’re in danger. A paladin’s here. An experienced

paladin.”

“How do you know he’s…?”

The question died in her throat as she got a good look at Fen: A longsword hung sheathed at his side, his armor worn and nicked dozens of scratches and dents across the faded symbol of a sunburst. At first she thought his left arm was draped in his riding cloak, hidden out of sight but as he pushed the hood from his head and adjusted the cloak with his right hand, she realized with an icy chill that he had no left arm.

Archibald shifted uncomfortably beside her.

“I lost it in a mighty battle.” Fen answered the group’s unasked question “I had it removed when a cursed creature bit my arm.”

“Cursed creature?” Abigail thought for a moment “Like a werewolf? Wait, there’s werewolves down here? How would that even work?”

“Mystic moon energy. Let’s move along.” Oliver chimed in “What are you hunting here in the dark?”

“Wait I want to know more about the werewolves!”

“Demon” Fen stated, ignoring Abigail’s inquires.

“We’re in its prison, aren’t we?” Oliver rubbed his eyes wearily.

Abigail stopped dead in her tracks “Demon?”

Fen remained silent but nodded in conformation.

“Demon.”

“For fucks sake. Can we leave?”

“Guys, there’s a demon here?”

Fen paused thoughtfully “I do not know but I would recommend against it. The sealing power of this place is weakened. If it were to escape….”

“Yeah, yeah.” Oliver cut him off “Innocent souls consumed, bloodshed, the standard spiel.”

Fen glared openly “How carefree it must be to hold nothing sacred.”

“Not all of us wear our bleeding hearts on our sleeve.” Oliver coldly replied.

Abigail cut in between them “There’s a demon here?!”

“Yes, I thought we made it clear. Keep up farm girl.”

“How are you not panicking?!”

“Survival instinct” Oliver explained simply “You can panic when you’re not about to die.”

“Speaking of, remember not to in a moment.” Fen glanced towards a darken hallway, drawing his blade quietly.

Something changed. The air, calm and still, became tense and uneasy. Goosebumps ran down Abigail’s spine as a sense of dread filled every inch of her body.

She wasn’t the only one who felt the shift: Archibald stood closer to her, one hand his bow the other on her shoulder, his breath steady yet stiff. Oliver held his lute in a death grip, his fingers curved in anticipation and ready to pluck the strings at a moment’s notice.

“It’s coming” Oliver whispered carefully to the others, his gaze fixated on the hallway before them.

At first Abigail was unsure how the bard knew that: the house was dark and the dusty air swirling about made it hard to make out anything beside silhouettes of furniture and decor.

Then she heard it: Thud, thud, thud of uneven footsteps as the demon lumbered ever closer to the group. The scraping of wood against something seemed impossibly loud in Abigail’s ears as she tried to shove down her fear from bubbling out of her throat.

“What the hell….?” she murmured as the creature shuffled uneasily into the room.

Oliver scoffed “Yes it did come from hell. Thank you farm girl.”

“Even now? Seriously Oliver?”

“It’s how I cope.”

The demon was humanoid, 7 feet tall with splotches of bruising across its deep red skin. The form was a strange mixture of heavily muscular and malnourished. It wobbled into the room, its thinly skeletal left leg being dragged along uselessly. It flexed its thick muscles threateningly as it held a massive weighed club up with little effort. The demon studied the others with sunken flaming eyes, its skin loose and pulled over the skull like an ill fitting mask. The wispy strains of reddish black hair swayed back and forth.

Abigail’s throat dried as the room became warm and stuffy almost as if this creature’s presence alone corrupted the air around them.

Abigail coughed a little, trying to clear her airway from the heat “What is that thing?!”

“No idea.” Oliver shrugged, clearing his throat as well.

“I thought you knew everything!”

“Not even close farm girl.”

“Then why do you act like it?!”

Abigail snarled but before she could strike at the bard, she felt Archibald’s hand gently squeeze her shoulder. She turned to face him and saw him breathing deep and slow.

He was right. This was not time to let her feat lash out everyone around her. She needed to stay calm if they were going to get out of this in one piece.

The demon tilted its head curiously at the group before it. It spoke deep and gravelly with a tone that was questioning but no one knew what it was asking.

“Maybe it’s asking if we come in peace?” Abigail chimed in hopefully.

“Tis a beast from hell. Do you really think it is asking for peace?” Fen scolded harshly.

Abigail’s cheeks flushed with embarrassment “I can dream alright! It’s my first time dealing a demon from the 7th pit of hell! Forgive me if I’m holding on to childish questions cause I’m trying not to freak out here! It’s how I cope!”

The demon grumbled its question again eyeing each person carefully.

“Watch for its left hook.” Fen cryptically offered.

“What?”

The demon shrieked, rattling the house violently before reaching out with its left hand. Without warning, the arm stretched forward towards the group, the skin wrinkling and pulling loose.

Abigail froze as the sharp nails grasped wildly in her direction.

Archibald moved, shoving Abigail out of the way but ran straight into the hand’s grasp. It dug its claws into his armor though luckily it hadn’t manage pierce skin.

“Archie!” Abigail cried, fumbling uselessly for her knife.

Fen and Oliver jumped into action: As the arm pulled back to drag the helpless archer closer, Fen grappled Archibald, holding on with all his strength. Oliver pluck his lute with a dramatic flourish, gold musical symbols filling the air for a moment. Abigail flinched at the clashing notes played but the demon’s reaction to the dissonance was far more explosive: Its face contorted and recoiled as if it Oliver had physically attacked it. Its body shuddered and its claws loosened their grip. Fen jabbed his blade into the demon’s grip over and over again until it released its hold on Archibald.

Demon snarled hungrily as the arm snapped back into place.

“Archie, Archie I’m sorry I…” The words died in Abigail’s throat as he gave her a comforting smile.

“Don’t worry farm girl.” Oliver shouted, pulling at her cloak to get her moving “It happens but if you’re not good at fighting…”

“Get good at getting out of the way.” Abigail whispered back as she allowed the bard to pull her to the side.

Oliver faced Abigail questioningly “Oh you know the saying? That’ll save time.”

Abigail remained silent. Arthur used to tell her that when he joined the knights.

Fen pushed forward, sword drawn with Archibald close behind.

Archibald fired an arrow, attempting to cover Fen’s approach but it bounced harmlessly off the demon’s skin.

Fen lunged forward, swinging wide and cutting a deep gash across its chest but the beast countered, aiming its club towards the paladin’s head. He ducked, tucking under the demon’s outstretched arm and backing off.

“Oi paladin! Where’s your holier than thou smiting divine power?” Oliver called from behind a chair.

Fen didn’t reply, too busy deflecting the demon’s club with the flat of his blade. He drove his blade deep into the creature’s shoulder but the demonic entity ignored it completely. It gripped him tightly by the armor and lifted off his feet. Fen tried to push the sword deeper but it wasn’t slowing the demon.

The demon bent it shoulder in an uneven angle as it raised its club just above Fen’s head. It gave toothy smile, its fangs glistening in the dark while preparing to deal the finish blow.

It staggered backwards as an arrow struck its eye. It bounced off same as before but the demon was caught unaware and reacted instinctively.

Fen took his chance. He reached into his hood and smashed a vial of clear liquid across the stunned demon’s face.

It howled in pain as steam rolled off its burning face. The demon dropped Fen as it wildly flailed about, smashing anything nearby to splinters.

It shouted in its infernal tongue before crashing into the doorway, breaking a chunk of the wall off and retreating deeper into the house.

Archibald shakily leaned against the wall to catch his breath while Oliver approached Fen, his jaw tense with anger.

“What’s the big idea?” Oliver poked the paladin’s chest “What scam are you running?”

Fen’s face twisted in anger “Scam? How dare you speak to me like that!”

“Stow it.” Oliver snarled “You are not a paladin.”

Fen rose to full height, glaring with unrestrained rage “I AM A PALADIN! THE CHOSEN OF SOLIUS!”

“Former chosen.” Oliver spat out.

The anger drained out of Fen’s eyes only to be replaced by shame.

Oliver clenched his fist “I knew it. This isn't some mission for a higher power. This is a suicide run trying to get back in your god’s good graces! He renounced you, didn’t he?”

Abigail stood rooted in place “Is that a thing?”

“Yeah. It’s a two way street. You devote your life and existence to a god and they grant you the power to do so but if they happen not to agree with how you do things then bye bye divine magic. That’s why he wasn’t smiting it with holy energy.”

Fen said nothing.

“God this is why I hate paladins.” Oliver fumed “You act better than anyone but you’re as a big a sham as me!”

“I am nothing like you.”

“You lost all rights to your high horse pal. Now what’s the plan?”

“The plan?” Fen repeated in confusion.

“Yes focus.” Oliver replied “The plan to deal with the demon. I assume you have one or did you come in here expecting to kill it with your normal boring self?”

Fen scoffed “I am not completely brain dead. Of course I have a plan.”

“Which is?”

“The seal.” Fen awkwardly started “If we can strengthen the seal, we can weaken the demon enough to put it to sleep.”

Oliver rubbed his eyes “And of course you don’t know where it is.”

“It is well hidden for a reason.”

Oliver let out a tired sigh.

“We’ll help” Abigail jumped in “We can’t let that thing escape into the Underground.”

“And we don’t want to die.” Oliver chimed in.

“That too."

Archibald looked uneasy but resigned. This wasn’t what he signed up for but he really didn’t have a choice.

Fen raised an eyebrow “And that is it? You’ll do it out of the goodness of your heart, bard?”

“Of course not” Oliver admitted “But the sooner we get this done, the sooner I don’t have to deal with you.”

“Finally we are agreed” Fen murmured.

Abigail sighed “I wish I didn’t have to deal with Oliver anymore.”

Oliver clapped his hand together, completely ignoring Abigail “Alright, let’s see what we’re working with. How many vials of holy water do you have left?”

Fen blinked in surprise “Three but how did you…?”

“Don’t bother.” Abigail mouthed.

“Alright. Give them to Archie. He can dip his arrows in them.” Fen rolled his eyes sarcastically “And what will I use oh great amazing leader? My sword is not enough to slay the beast and I need time to apply the water as well.”

Oliver stepped closer, staring eye to eye with the paladin as he pushed his lute into his hands “If you lose this, I will kill you.”

“And what am I suppose to do with this? Play a song about friendship and love? Overcharge for a children’s rhythm?” Fen mocked.

“No you idiot.” Oliver pulled away “You beat him back to hell with it.”

Fen stared at him utterly lost.

Oliver knocked on the surface of the lute “It’s magic.”

Fen couldn’t contain his surprise despite his loathing of the bard

“Your lute is magic?”

Oliver rolled his eyes “Yes. It’s not a sword or a spear but at least you’ll be able to hurt him some. At least enough for me and farm girl to find the seal.”

“Me and who now?” Abigail shook her head “Wait, your lute is magic? Why is that important?”

“Demons are naturally resistant to mortal weapons” Fen explained as he held the lute aloft, getting a feel for its weight “It would be like attacking them with a butter knife, Painful but ultimately an empty gesture. But magic, whether spells or items imbued, can bypass their nature. Holy magic would be ideal hence the holy water.”

“But we work with what we got.” Oliver finished “And can you fight farm girl?”

Abigail shifted her foot shamefully.

Oliver snapped his finger “No. Don’t do that. Nothing wrong with not knowing how to fight. I don’t.”

“But you know magic!” Abigail argued “That’s more than me.”

“Look I don’t like you.” Oliver admitted “But beating yourself up isn’t going to save us. Yes I know magic but I’m not going to be tossing fire or lightning out of my fingertips. That’s not how my magic works. Finding that seal is just as important as Archibald’s and Fen’s job.”

Abigail glanced towards Archibald. His face was grim but determined.

“What’s your job Archie?” Abigail asked gently, unable to keep the worry out of her voice.

Archibald punched a fist into his hand.

“You’re planning on fighting? That thing?”

Archibald nodded firmly.

“Archie, you can’t be serious! What if it hurts you? I promised Cecilia I’d keep you safe! Archie…”

Abigail stopped as the archer wrapped his arms tightly around her. It was warm and gentle. Tears formed in her eyes. It felt nice to be hugged again. She hadn’t been hugged in such a long time she forgot how calming it was.

He pulled away, giving her a soft smile.

Abigail still wasn’t happy with the situation but there was little choice left.

“Alright.” Oliver spoke with an edge of finality “While you two keep the demonic asshole distracted, me and farm girl will find the seal and try to strengthen it.”

“Farm girl and I” Abigail corrected.

“Seriously?”

“No, I wanted to mess with you. It’s how I cope.”

Oliver glared “We need to move fast. Once the seal is strengthen we’ll need to make a break for the exit as soon as possible because I am not dealing this place longer than I have to.”

“Do you even know how to strengthen ancient seals?” Abigail asked

“No idea but I’m a quick study.” Oliver admitted.

Abigail glanced out the grime covered windows “That’s not very comforting. And what if those shadowy creatures are out there still?”

“That’s a for later problem. Let’s focus on one life or death situation at a time.”

“Fun” Abigail replied glumly “I’m really enjoying my time in the underground guys.”

“That’s the spirit farm girl!

“I hate you so much right now.”

[mst3kproject]

Killers from Space

Oh, look. Peter Graves, Frank Gerstle (Dr. Frank from The Atomic Brain), stock footage of atomic tests, and some stupid-looking aliens.  Let’s do this!

A deep-voiced 50's narrator (old friend!  We've missed you!) tells us about an upcoming bomb test, and it's a good thing he uses the phrase 'tension mounts' or we wouldn't be able to tell.  After the test, scientist Dr. Doug Martin circles in closer to get readings – but then his pilot suddenly loses control of the plane!  Somehow Martin survives the crash, reappearing out of the desert a few days later without a mark on him except a weirdly right-angled scar on his chest.  At first he seems all right, but then he begins acting very oddly, which culminates in him stealing data from his lab and delivering it to a drop point in the desert, then crashing his car as he tries to flee.  Under the influence of truth serum, Martin reveals that he was kidnapped and experimented on by aliens, who are using the radiation of the atomic tests to create an army of monsters with which they will conquer the Earth!

This one hits a lot of notes: alien abductions, hypnotic regression, and superimposed footage of small creatures made to look big – including a giant gila monster! Considering the cast, the themes, the use of stock footage, and the fact that it appeared on The Film Crew, I'm honestly shocked that Killers from Space never made it to MST3K proper.  Our old pals New Petitions Against Tax and Building Code Under Fire even make appearances!  If Joel hadn't already promised us us widescreen-only, I'd fully expect to see it in the new season somewhere.

Killers from Space is a remarkably ambitious movie, actually.  It's got an interesting premise and tries to show us a lot of things – it fails rather spectacularly but damn, it tries.  For starters, consider Dr. Martin's curious dual role.  In the first half of the film, before we find out what happened to him while he was missing, he comes across as a possible villain.  His colleagues don't want him returning to work because he's a security risk, and their fears turn out to be well-founded as he steals data and turns it over to the aliens.  Then he remembers what happened during his abduction, and turns into the movie's hero as he desperately tries to undo the damage he helped to cause.

The idea of Martin becoming an agent for the aliens against his own will is a truly creepy one.  It is even implied that they intended he should die once he was no longer useful to them – having delivered the information they wanted, he quickly crashes his car.  I think we're supposed to believe it was pure luck that he survived with their hold on him now broken, rather than expiring in the wreck (although this would have been a lot clearer if he'd been at all injured in the accident).  There's an undertone here similar to that of It Conquered the World, with its fear that seditious elements could be anyone, anywhere – indeed, you may be a traitor and not even know it!

I also gotta say, I don't remember the last time I saw a movie that gave such a good, clear reason for why the ending is a chase scene in a power plant.  A lot of movies seem to randomly end up at power plants somehow.  This one goes there on purpose and the plant itself plays an important role in the climax.

Besides a paranoid spy thriller, the other thing Killers from Space really wants to be is a special effects extravaganza.  I mean, we've got planes flying perilously close to atomic explosions.  We've got aliens doing weird medical procedures using unimaginable technologies.  We've got cockroaches the size of rhinos, for crying out loud.  It is to the movie's credit that it does make an effort to show us all these things.  We actually see the aliens and their cities, we see Martin's heart being worked on outside of his body, we see the plane spiral out of control.  Unfortuantely, the movie's budget was in no way equal to its ambitions, and all of these things look stupid.

Martin's heart operation is seen only for a moment with the organ itself in silhouette.  That much is pretty good: it tells us just enough that we can imagine the rest, and doesn't over-reach itself.  Then we get a wider shot of a room full of random electronics and guys dressed as aliens, and the creepy factor simply implodes in a shower of giggles. We're in a cave. There's oscilloscopes and ham radios.  A set of calculations are presented to us that turn out to be high school algebra written on tinfoil.  And most memorable of all – indeed, probably the only thing anybody really remembers about this movie – the 'aliens' have ping-pong balls for eyes.

What, you thought I was exaggerating?  Look at that.  They literally took ping-pong balls, cut them in half, and drew eyes on them, and the actors had to talk while keeping their faces scrunched up to wedge the balls between their cheeks and eyebrows.  It looks ridiculous and the poor bastards can't move around much or interact with anything because all they can see are the insides of the ping-pong balls.  The guy playing the alien leader also has tremendous furry eyebrows.  He looks like a comedy interpretation of one of those Japanese demon masks.

The rest of the effects suck, too – not so vastly as the aliens, true, but they're still bad.  The plane circling the nuclear explosion is superimposed and transparent, which is at least amusing.  So are the flying saucers and alien cities, which are cartoons, and not even particularly well-animated ones.  The giant bugs and reptiles Martin encounters in the cavern are back-projected and never look remotely like they're in the same space as he is.  Some interesting things are done with the sound here in an attempt to make the creatures feel big and sometimes it kinda works, but mostly it just gives us Bert I. Gordon flashbacks.  The animals never look like they're aware of Martin's presence, and the scene just goes on and on and ON.  I got bored, went to the bathroom, came back, and it was still happening.

See if you can count how many times Martin rounds the same damn corner in this sequence.  Also, I think they actually set a cockroach on fire for the bit where the aliens zap it with gamma rays.  Cockroaches don't figure very highly in anybody's sympathy lists but come on, that was just unnecessary.  For one final failure before the credits roll, the nuclear explosion visible out the window at the end suggests that the power plant is several thousand feet in the air and at a sixty-degree angle.  Nope.  Sorry.  Doesn't work.  Looks dumb.  Goodnight.

I could end the review here, but instead I'm gonna start talking about flying saucers again.  Like This Island Earth, Killers from Space also has a bit to say about the UFO mythology – and much of it is astonishingly prescient.  Martin loses consciousness and awakens on a table, where humanoid beings with large, frightening eyes are performing medical procedures on him.  Afterwards, however, he remembers nothing.  Time has passed that he cannot account for, and he keeps having inexplicable nightmares, but the reason why remains a mystery until an artificial way of getting at the truth is imposed on him.  Then the story comes out, only for anyone who hears it to dismiss him as a madman.

The first proper 'alien abduction' is considered to be that of Betty and Barney Hill.  They arrived home from a trip and realized it had taken longer than it should have.  After having nightmares, they went and saw a psychologist who hypnotized them both, and got from them a story about how they'd been taken away by large-eyed humanoids who'd experimented on them.  The hypnotist himself never believed this was anything but an account of their nightmares, but other people have been more credulous and alien abductions went on to become a big thing.  My junior high school library had a copy of Whitley Strieber's Communion in one of those spinning wire stands... I hated going in there because I'd try to browse for books and there was that nasty little alien staring at me from the cover.

One would be tempted to conclude that Killers from Space took elements of its narrative from this story, the way I speculated This Island Earth borrowed from the death of Thomas Mantell and Not of This Earth drew on the stories of Men in Black.  To do so would be wrong, however, because the Hills' experience didn't happen until 1961!  Self-proclaimed 'UFOlogists' have argued that there is nothing in the popular culture of the time to have given people the idea for 'alien abductions', and so this must be something that actually happens.  Killers from Space proves that this is simply not true, and I would bet my socks the Hills had seen this movie.

(You may be wondering why the hell I keep talking about the UFO mythology. Or you may not, because if you've been following this blog for a while, you will have realized I have a crippling addiction to trash television.  I know way too much about bigfoot, the ancient astronaut theory, and how to dispose of a body, among other things.  You have probably also got some inkling of my complicated love-hate relationship with the movie Avatar, but that's less relevant to this review.)

So that's Killers from Space. It's got some interesting stuff in it, but fails at almost everything it tries to do.  I do gotta give it one more thing, though.  The title Killers from Space sounds like it's probably ridiculous hyperbole, if it has anything to do with the film at all – but no, the bad guys definitely are from space, and they kill at least one person (Martin's pilot)!  So while no, It didn't Conquer the World, the Monster wasn't particularly Mad, and The Thing that Couldn't,Died... this movie really was about Killers from Space.