#AND it's also interesting because he wouldn't for the life of him find other tal-vashoth and discuss this matter with them

[platoniccereal]

an obligatory bull post no. 8425903, in some relation to this big fella.

there’s no proper way to learn how to deal with feelings that doesn’t include going through them fully and learning how to express them healthy. and actually, bull’s got an opportunity not many people even under the qun have. that’s exactly his blood thirst and fighting experience he’s so cautious about.

he might see it as a possibility of snapping into this state, hurting someone he cares about, he believes it’s exactly his unique battle experience that makes him even more prone to going rogue. 

but it would be a cool character growth possibility for him to see that it also means that he goes into violence and blood thirst and mayhem, and he’s coming back every time. bull might be afraid of what-if scenarios, but statistically speaking, he knows his way back for over 10 years already. narrative-wise, it’s in a direct opposition of what he’s afraid of.

there are many confusing things because of the new identity, and the loss of superiors who controlled him is stressful, he’s already got the tools and experience he needs. bull tells sera about it, 

he knows where to apply his blood thirst. losing this guidance is painful, but the tool set is still there.