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redmelawashere · 1 year

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SNS 2022 Prompts week 4

Week 1 summaries are here!

Week 2 summaries here :) Week 3 summaries reporting for duty.

Full fics can be read here on my AO3 😊

I finally completed them THE SECOND DAY OF THE SNS 2023 EXTRAVAGANZA. WHICH I WILL ALSO BE PARTICIPATING IN. Stay tuned on my AO3! Those new prompts will be uploaded as of tomorrow :)

22 - Traveling Together

In which there is a cold hotel room, Naruto starts to feel more like herself, and there is a shared moment of intimacy between her and Sasuke in the early morning somewhere in Northern Lightning Country.

(Pt. IV of the "Sun and Moon", "Early Mornings", and "Naruto Opening (Diver)" prompts and honestly, an excuse to write 3500+ words of women empowerment pwp.)

23 - Royalty AU

"I’m sorry, but not all of us are related to the King and have the pleasure of being an insolent, pompous, shithead in front of the entire continent without fear of retribution.” She stomped past him, hoping that this would be the last she’d see of Uchiha Sasuke. Her mother tells her a week later that Sasuke has accepted the proposal.

She takes the letter, handwritten by the King himself, and rips it up into tiny square pieces

(A very loose HouseoftheDragon!AU, without the incest, and a dash of arranged marriage.)

24 - Angels and Demons

“Alright kid,” Naruto started midway through the day, rubbing her temples. “Why am I an oni?”

“Because you ensnared, Sasuke-kun! All he does is stare at you all day!”

“Ugh, haven’t you ever heard of like, women supporting women?”

(In which the Daimyo's relative is a massive royal pain in Naruto's ass.)

25 - You Bring Colours to this Bleak World

"Come with me." he commanded in a low and dangerous tone, his red eyes gleaming in the darkness of her room.

She stared at him with disbelief, not knowing whether this was yet another one of her hallucinatory dreams or some sick, twisted joke.

(The sister fic, and pt.II of “Soulmates” prompt.)

26 - First Love

He sighed heavily, pressing the heels of his palms into his forehead.

"Dobe—I didn't mean—fuck—what are we going to do with all of this? We are going to be eating onigiri for days."

(Sasuke is reminded of the fact that he was the one who fell in love first. Pt.II of the "Going on a date" prompt.)

27 - Side by Side

“You’re free to interpret it as you like.”

“Did it make you think of me?”

Sasuke froze, staring at her with piercing, obsidian orbs.

“Yes,” he admitted lowly. “Is that what you wanted to hear?”

(In which Naruto starts to feel better and Sasuke, once again, has to shake the blonde out of her ugly insecurities. Pt. V of the "Sun and Moon", "Early Mornings", "Naruto Opening (Diver)", and "Travelling Together" prompts.)

28 - Greek Mythology

“Sasuke, I’m sorry—”

“—F-fuck you.”

He has to keep moving.

(A Hades!AU for the Greek Mythology prompt featuring Zagreus!Naruto and Maegara!Sasuke instead of the classic PersephonexHades adaptation. Another yaoi fic! )

29 - Touch him and I'll kill you!

“—What are you two talking about?” Ino interjected again, eyes darting between her two solemn friends. Sakura looked at Kiba who nodded. The pinkette then cupped her hands around her mouth, whispering loudly, “we think Naruto is pregnant.”

“Oh? Tell me everything.”

(The one where rumours are swirling around Naruto and Sasuke's expanding family. If only they knew the truth was more furry in nature.)

30 - Rockstar/Band/Music AU

“Wait, your training sessions are a secret?” Sakura hissed; eyes narrowed suspiciously as she grabbed another piece of barbeque ribs.

“Jinchuuriki things you normies wouldn’t understand,” she shot back. “Seriously. You think he tells me about his music career when we’re busy beating the shit out of each other or meditating with our Bijuu? Obviously not.”

(In which Naruto lied. She did know, and accidentally became a secret back-up singer for Bee and everyone loses their goddamn minds. Crack treated seriously.)

31 - Winter

“Do you care if I record something?”

“Yes. I don’t want my fucking face all over the internet and especially in your dumbass TikTok’s idiot—which, by the way, I’m still pissed about.”

She turned to him with a raised eyebrow.

“Stupid Tiktoks? Okay, I’m sorry for posting that one video of you without asking, but I guess it's kind of funny that you think they’re stupid, considering you’ve been spying on my profile for months.”

(AKA Naruto becomes TikTok famous in the ninja world and Sasuke has had just about enough of her going viral every other Tuesday. Crack treated seriously.)

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hohoz · 3 years

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The ones that suffer the most

I wanted to talk about this for a long time.

I’m a Resident evil addicted, I finished almost every RE game released and I must say that Capcom made some poor choices regarding Jill and Chris, they are EASILY the most mistreated characters in RE Franchise.

But let’s explain why is that:

Jill and Chris are survivors, they had to survive in a mansion with a lot of puzzles and zombies, while looking for items that could help them to progress and find a way to reach Brad.

When they arrive at STARS Office, they are revolted that Umbrella did all that under their noses and innocents were dying because of that and they explained EVERYTHING in a report - but Irons made that go away.

In the ORIGINAL RE3 we had this special file (Jill’s Diary)

August 7th Two weeks have passed since that day. My wounds have been healed, but I just can't forget it. For most people, it's history now. But for me, whenever I close my eyes, it all comes back clearly. Zombies eating people's flesh and the screams of my teammates dying. No, the wounds in my heart are not healed yet...

August 13th Chris has been causing a lot of trouble recently. What's with him? He seldom talks to the other police members and is constantly irritated. The other day, he punched Elran of the Boy's Crime department just for accidentally splashing Chris's face with coffee. I immediately stopped Chris, but when he saw me he just gave me a wink and walked away. I wonder what happened to him...

August 15th Midnight. Chris, who has been on a leave of absence for a "vacation," called me so I visited his apartment. As soon as I walked into his room, he showed me a couple of pieces of paper. They were part of a virus research report entitled as simply as "G". Then Chris told me that, "The nightmare still continues." He went on to say that, "It's not over yet." Ever since that day, he has been fighting all by himself without rest, without even telling me.

August 24th Chris left the town today to go to Europe. Barry told me that he would send his family to Canada and then he would follow Chris. I decided to remain in Raccoon City for a while because I know that the research facility in this city will be very important to this entire case. In a month or so, I'll be joining with them somewhere in Europe. That's when my real battle begins...

For some weird reason this file isn’t available in RE3 Remake.

But ok, here we see that Chris was doing some investigation - in the RE2RMK you could see this letter that Chris left in a way that normal people wouldn't understand - the only thing that Claire says is that “doesnt look like him” but how normies would understand what Chris is like is he is not well represented in media ??????????????????

And Jill had all the detective work in her wall.

So far so good - we understand the basics about them - they are Special police force, the elite, they had a traumatic experience and they survived to tell the story.

Some problems until now:

Jill had a MAJOR personality change in RE3 RMK- I honestly like most of that, she is a badass in the originals and she is a badass in the rmk but I still dislike the fact that she swears all the time (specially because in RE1, RE Rev, RE5 she doesn't do that)

We can tell a lot about her personality just looking at her room, but I still miss some stuff (I had expectations - so this is not a real problem. but still) like a Vinyl player (since she is probably into classical music), some letters from her father so new players can understand her origin and why is she so good in lockpicking and more about her dog (she had a pic in the original that could’ve been her boyfriend but it was replaced by a dog in RE2 rmk but in RE3 Rmk there in no dog)

Okay - after you finish the game the only thing we see is this:

In my opinion this is Chris since he is always associated with Green colors while Jill is associated with blue.

So my speculation here is that she found him while in the original we had this:

This is not a major chance but still is important (lore of course - duh) but the problem here is that while Jill is looking for him - Code Veronica is happening.

So I can only assume two things, they did not show him because they DON’T HAVE A FACE FOR HIM or I am wrong and that is Jill, but if that is Jill so why there is no decent epilogue like the original ?

Okay, now we are arriving in the real trouble area

I will do RE5 first and the Wii and Rev1 (even tho those two comes first in the lore)

RESIDENT EVIL 5

So before the game was release we had some propaganda, including this:

So have in mind that Jill was dead, I thought that she died and RE5 would explain that shit.

But in the beginning we see that Chris is looking for her and have in mind that Chris HAD A MAJOR CHANCE IN HIS APPEARANCE, and I’m not talking about his muscles.

I will not address Chris in CV since he was good in that game but I the team that made CV also made the original, it had CONSISTENCE.

Here we have Chris, he’s THE classical american soldier protagonist from Hollywood in the 80′s/90′s and he had some omage to TOPGUN

He also shares some traits with his sister

A major trait here is that HE HAS BLUE EYES, typical good looking soldier from US.

and now let’s have a look at Chris in RE5...

Yeah... I still hate this face even tho I love his Character in this game, this ugly a** monkey looking mf and he had a lot of steroids

So we have some lore to him in RE5, Jill and Chris went to a mansion looking for Spencer (one of the fathers of Umbrella and the one that was behind project Wesker, he wanted to do this Virus so he could live forever, so RE has a good lore, it’s not just about zombies) but when they found him, he was dead and Wesker was by his side, in a fight Jill sacrificed herself to save Chris’s life.

Chris started doing mission after mission because her body was never found, and he made a name for himself, he became a ‘legend’ inside BSAA and you can see that in the beginning of RE5.

The reason behind the muscles was probably to fight Wesker mano to mano but still is not well made, it really felt weird playing for the first time.

So now we have a problem here, there is thing that you use in a narrative that is to make someone strong af powerless, and they did that to Jill. (a good example of this is in TWD- Ricky is a fucking legend and Negan made him powerless in the face of a event)

Jill was used in a Boss fight and that is it... She is not in the game as a character, she is being manipulated and her whole design was changed, she looks like Nina from Tekken. WTF. - BTW, the fact that Wesker had mind control over her created 1000 fics of sex

So that is it, my main problem here isnt Jill itself, but it’s the fact that they used her character as a boss even tho she is the heroine, she never appears in RE lore again until some guy inside Capcom said “Well people are asking about Jill so let’s place a file in Rev2 saying that she is in rehab”

The only time that she appears again is in a 3DS NINTENDO ONLY game, it felt that Capcom simply don’t care about her character.

By the way Revelations 1 is a great game and was adaptable some years later for PC and consoles

But you think that this is bad, wait until we arrive at RESIDENT EVIL 6

When I learned that Jill was not in RE6 I was mad... But after I played that game I said “thank you God” that game was bad, transformers kind of bad, it had bad writing, the lore was all over the place and Chris was the one that suffered the most in this game.

He was responsible for the death of an entire squad, suffered amnesia and people still wanted him in the command

THEY MADE HIM AN ALCOHOLIC

The golden boy of BSAA reduced to THIS.

By the way, the director said that HE WANTED TO KILL CHRIS IN THIS GAME to SUBVERT EXPECTATIONS - so if you liked Piers now that he died only because of that.

So now let’s analyse what we know:

The first 2 main characters are not well represented in media until RE6, they don’t know how to re introduce Jill in the games and Chris was reduced to a normal guy at a Russian bar;

But it gets worse...

Capcom LOVE Leon, we know that. he is always the hero, he is the protagonist in almost every movie and he is always the cool guy so when he get’s a new model, he looks like this:

But When Chris get’s a new face he look like this:

WHO DAFUQ ARE U, no offense to the model but he has NEGATIVE JAW LINE.

And still he doesn't look like Claire’s brother, there is no blue/green eyes and he looks younger that he was in 6 (and 6 still uses that ugly character model)

But let’s go in the lore- we HAVE 0 info on Jill in RE6 / RE7 and no sight of her in RE8

And speaking of which, they tried to make Chris the bad guy in the trailer so when we play we see “Ohhhh he was not the bad guy, that happened and that is why he did that”

But still...

If they are going to do that to his character don’t use this character, shit ! Do something with that Wesker’s son that made 0 sense in RE6 but leave Chris out of this - it really feels that they simply don’t know how to treat him right

And you may think that I may be complaining a lot because of his appearance

But this is him in RE8

(to me this is some random dude from Russia)

And this is him in RE:Verse (that is going to be release TOGETHER)

So this tells me that they have 0 clue of how to handle his looks

Jill got RE3Rmk but it felt like a cheap game compared to RE2Rmk where the original RE3 was SO MUCH BETTER

And this is bad because there are so many new fans joining the fandom only to see 2 great characters suffering from poor director’s choices.

I’m sorry about this rant, if you like Chris face and looks its okay, really, but dont tell me that Chris from 5/6/8 is the same from 1/CV and if you think im wrong about Jill its fine, but she is an amazing character that could have so much more impact in RE universe (I mean, she never even appeared in a RE movie - animations)

But it’s sad to see so many characters that receive good representation in media and good games/lore while Jill get’s almost none and Chris is handled like random face guy.

I was going to talk a little bit more about Rev 1 and RE Umbrella Chronicles but there is no need since Im mad right now and it seems that Capcom has 0 interest in making Code Veronica and Umbrella’s fall after that since their fav boy Leon need a rmk in RE4 even tho RE4 is not that old.

Bonus:

Fun fact: Chris served in the Air force, so yeah, to me even Tom Cruise looks more like Chris than Chris from the games

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watching-pictures-move · 3 years

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Movie Review | Nightmare Sisters (DeCoteau, 1988)

This review contains mild spoilers.

David DeCoteau's Nightmare Sisters opens with a pretty hideous racial caricature, where an actor playing a fortune teller does a terrible Indian accent. Now, this was made in the '80s, the same decade we got Long Duk Dong in Sixteen Candles and Takashi in Revenge of the Nerds, so this level of racism is nothing out of the ordinary. But in those cases, you could at least argue that the performers were putting enough effort into their performances to make there scenes at least watchable. The guy here is teeeeerrible and his scene goes on for sooooo long. Anyway, the scene features a widow asking about her probably dead husband, who when summoned has his dick bitten off by an evil spirit, who then kills the fortune teller, making it the hero of the movie, or at least this scene. Because this is a pretty low budget affair, most of this is thankfully implied.

Thankfully, the movie gets quite a bit better after this point, as we move to a group of extremely dorky sorority sisters who come into possession of the fortune teller's crystal ball. These sorority sisters are played by established scream queens Linnea Quigley, Brinke Stevens and Michelle Bauer, who are specialists in these kinds of movies, and from whom I'd seen and enjoyed a few things. Quigley is one of the best parts of the great zombie movie Return of the Living Dead, which on top of being super entertaining and funny I've grown to find surprisingly moving with my last couple of viewings. (Great movies have a way of sneaking up on you like that.) Stevens is of course in the feminist slasher movie Slumber Party Massacre, which spells out the subtext of these movies by having the killer's weapon be an extremely phallic drill. And Bauer is in Cafe Flesh, which is not a horror movie but a porno, but likely a much more palatable one to normie viewers given its emphasis on mise-en-scene and elaborately choreographed stage performances over gynecology. I was happy to see all three present, is what I'm saying.

These girls, left with nothing to do over the weekend, decide to throw a party and invite the only guys they know, some real Robert Carradine Revenge of the Nerds motherfuckers who are about as dorky as they are and similarly at the bottom rung of their fraternity. Of course once the party starts, they foolishly mess around with the crystal ball and the girls get possessed by the same spirit. Now, the girls were extremely dorky previously and had appearances that lined up with that image, with Quigley's buckteeth, Stevens' dangerously pointy glasses and Bauer's fatsuit. They seemed like perfectly nice people and might have had lots of inner beauty for all we know, but that doesn't photograph as well nor does it appeal to the horndogs in the audience, so once they get possessed they get a lot conventionally hotter and spend the rest of the movie in varying states of undress. This movie probably has more nudity than any non-porno I've watched in quite some time. Hell, right after their transformation, the immediately smear peach pie over their breasts and then spend what seems to be ten minutes bathing together while the Anthony Edwardsish heroes watch through a peephole. Apparently there's a TV-edit that excises all the nudity. I haven't watched it and can only assume it's ten minutes long.

It's worth noting at this point that DeCoteau is gay and this plays like a really broad attempt at pandering to the predominantly straight target male audience for these kinds of movies. As parodic as the results may be, I must shamefully admit that he has us dead to rights. Of course, given the title, something must be off, and as the homophobic meathead fraternity brothers who show up to give the male leads a hard time find out in the least pleasant way possible, it turns out that the girls have turned into succubi. Emphasis on the "suck", as the song that plays over the opening credits suggests. Or perhaps a more accurate name would be "bite-ubi". Given that they, you know, kill their victims by biting their dicks. Their "wing wangs", as one of the girls says while possessed. I think another uses the phrase "python of love", but I neglected to write down the complete line of dialogue so I could be wrong. DeCoteau is not a cruel man, so he spares us the sight of this act, but he taps into very real male anxieties in this movie.

Of course, to wrap this all up, the Curtis Armstrong, Lamar Lattrellish heroes enlist the help of an exorcist whose role is extremely self aware but not unamusing, and the situation is resolved with some pretty lo-fi special effects. (Okay, I lied, the heroes are a lot more presentable than Armstrong. Also Lamar Lattrell is actually the character's name and not the actor's, the heroes are all pasty white dudes and the only person with a musical number is Quigley. I ran out of Revenge of the Nerds references, I'm sorry.) This is an extremely unambitious affair, having been shot in four days as a challenge to use up short ends left over from the production of Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-a-Rama, but I had a good time. While I won't pretend that the shamelessly pandering nudity didn't have an effect on me, what really sells this movie is the presence of Quigley, Stevens and Bauer, who are extremely winning in playing their characters both pre- and post-possession. (I think the term "adorkable" applies to the former.) My technical knowledge is lacking here, but while I understand there were inconsistencies in the film stock used, I didn't find that to manifest in the film's (not particularly accomplished but also not unattractive) visual style. And the movie has a nice, laidback sense of humour, which (aside from the opening scene) sustains the good vibes over the brief runtime.

#film #movie review #nightmare sisters #david decoteau

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voidcollectorsworld · 5 years

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endgame spoilers endgame spoilers endgame spoilers endgame spoilers endgame spoilers

me watching the movie,unedited:

the first hour:

cliff losing his family at the begining and me being oh honey no.

the quality was so bad i thought tony had died.then he woke up and i stopped being sad.

then the old team was reunited and i lost my shit because(steve ran for tony before pepper did and i am sorry but now i also ship stony,like before ,i didnt really have an opinion about it) tony was sat there like a cancer kid and he said i told you so,he said cap wasnt there to help like he said he would.then he ripped out his reactor heart and put it in his hand (i lost my shit is that technically suicide???)i cried.

thor beheading that purple used toilet paper was overwhelming.like welp.what now?

scott coming back was more emotional for me than i thought it would.i cried when he hugged her daughter.

tony retiring and having a cute daughter and living far away was THE thing i had always hoped for.but he had a photo of peter and clearly he feels like he lost a child so of fucking course he would help the team.

i lost my shit with hipster-hulk.like omfg.i can already see all the brucexthor fanfics updating to this version :)

valkyrie is still a cutie.

when they said time travel my first thought was loki.

i know fat!thor is supposed to be comic relief but,if i be honest,i loved it more than regular thor?like all those high definition abs are always welcome but real vikings must have looked like this,like if you watch those strongest men competition shows they have muscles that arent for show and tell and they have bellies and also his hair is long again and i loved it because unlike the other times,the coloring wasnt poor quality wig,i could tell even with the hdcam quality :)

thor plays fortnite and has a beer belly and has been mourning he never shaved or cut his hair again (i love new asgard)

the 2nd hour:

thor being cringy and sad about the past.

thor having a panic attack.

bruce trying to conjure anger.

tony and scott debating on cap's ass in tights.

loki in his cell.loki making fun of cap.

loki doing a tiny hand good bye in the lift.

couldnt catch what cap said to the security guy "trust me what"?

gagged loki eye roll

loki noticing the case :)))) omfg my opportunistic baby :)))))))))

also yes he is fucking powerful he touches the stone bare handed.yall remember what happens a normie does that right?

thor giving tony the equavalent of defibrillation

yes.this is the captain america erotic auto asphyxiation thing i never knew i needed in my life

thanos looking thru nebula's memories 😑

thor and his mom getting jump scared lol also awwwww hug advice awww iloveyoumum *imcrying*

yas mjolnir is back baby

quill is an idiot lolol

i have never shipped stony in my life and now i stan it so much it isnt my fault theyre just going so strong in this movie

howard...potts :)))))

omg is tony gonna see his mom?his own birth?

oh peggy :(

weird beard :)

cliff and natasha doing the pride and prejudice forehead touch i am not crying you are

let me go *cry*

oh no thats the old version nebula i know it

clint where is nat? :(

yeah just killed off the original girl :(((

just let me do something good :(

woah woah woah thor honey stahp

bruce no

gamma rays.my oldest enemy

thor double thumbs up

fucking thanos and old nebula

like really you could've made this a more fun more classic heist oceans 12 avengers fun but oh no lets recylce the most stupid dumbest plot in history that got so much fucking budget without anyone shutting out for being so fucking stupid a 12 year old could debunk like really are there no people in hollywood are yall a bunch of brainless seeweed?

the whole place ruined ugh

the final hour:

run cliff run *gets finnick odair ptsd flashbacks*

they become sister yes coz gamora always looks for a tiny nod from nebula yes i wont cry

"you could not live with your own failure",is thanos my depression talking?

thanos goes on another pseudophilosophical hashtag deep fuckboi mansplaining rant

this is stupid they shouldve brought carol with them

omg omg omg omg omgour theoryguys our theorycap and mjolnir yassssss yassss yassss "i knew it"

ohno the shield nooo

but steve always gets back up parallel to the captain america origin story 😭

oh no the ugly army

wakanda forever bitches :))))

doctor strange yaaaaay

peter!!!honey!!im crying i cant breathe

bucky!

val!!

groot!

wasp!

"ah give me that,you can have the little one" awww

peter and tony meeting again :) (i watched this scene 6 times in a row !!!)

peter :you remember when we were in space and i got all dusty?and i wokeup and you were gone and dr strange was ther-

tony : *looks at peter like my son is alive i cant believe he is really alive shut up you have no idea how much i love you and you put me through hell let me give you a real hug *

peter:*steps back cause he has no idea*

tony: *hugs peter.yeah.now it feels real*

peter:oh this is nice

gamora decked quil haahaha serves him right

"this is the one?srsly?"

"choices were him or a tree" 😂

yeah play american football with the gauntlet imSURE nothing bad will happen

hello my name is scarlet witch your killed my boyfriend prepare to die!

carol *i came in like a wrecking ball* :)

all female badass team :)))))))))

are you fucking kidding me?are you fucking kidding me?he got the glove back again?this is bad writing and impossible

carol denvers is THAT fucking strong yet still bad writing guys thanos knocking her away is bad writing

tony looks at his husband.

strange looks at tony.

tony no!

"i am inevitable"

*snaps*

nothing happens...

*audiance laughs*

i...am...ironman...*snaps*

tony plz take it off i swear if you die😢...

mister stark we won 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

peter...had to go...through...that...again...after uncle ben....oh😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

im sobbing and angry and i was hugging my tv and kneeling in front of it and then kicking the air and throwing the pillows and punching them😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

val is queen now.

thor is leaving for space adventures.

"everyone knows who's in charge"

😐

why is cap old

this bucky erasure😐😐😐😐😐

my hdcam version's audio was cut off at the end also no end screen

#endgame spoilers #avengers endgame #i live in iran #i couldnt wait for the good version to come out #last time i waited for thor ragnorak and it was months of spoilers for me #so i took my chances with the bootleg #i would have paid for it but not a single cinema in all my country has it #so yeah #one more reason i hate my life in this shithole

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clockworkfromspace · 4 years

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The Book v2 chapter 5

-Jea seems to be completely drawn into her comic-

Jenifer: She'll be like that until she's done with it.

Jenifer: We might as well leave her be.

-she walks out of the room-

Chris turns into a pup and runs off

*follows jenifer*

-Mr. Kon pulls into the driveway-

Chris waits at the door

-he opens the door-

Chris just stays

-not noticing Chris, he steps over him-

He whimpers

*whispers to Jenifer* oh shit that’s your dad. i’ll be in the attic *teleports to attic*

Mr. Kon: oh sorry gir-- Boy, forgot Jea brought you home.

Chris jumps on him

-Jenifer walks in-

"Hey dad."

Mr. Kon: Hey Jenny. Where's your sister?

Jenifer: She's in her room reading.

Mr. Kon: Okay.

Chris follows mr. Kon

-he goes to his room-

Chris doesn't go in

Mr. Kon: I'm pretty worn out so I'm gonna take a nap. Wake me up in 30 minutes.

Jenifer: Okay.

-he closes his door down goes to sleep-

-Jenifer sits on the couch and turns o the tv-

-30 min later, Jea comes out of her room-

-She crawls out of her room groaning-

Jenifer: What's wrong?

Jea: That book was so boring. I need something to interest me.

Jea: When was the last time you spoke with Leah?

Jenifer: THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

Jea: As your TWIN sister, your love life is 65% my business.

Jenifer: Your logic is invalid

Jenifer: Also, keep your voice down before someone hears you -she points to the roof and to Chris-

Chris was sleeping at the door

Jea: Sorry.

-she scoots back into her room-

Jenifer: Oh yeah, dad. HEY DAD, WAKE UP!

-Mr. Kon literally rolls out of bed and falls onto the floor-

Mr. Kon: Ow. Thanks Jenny!

-he takes a while to change into a casual outfit then steps outside-

He steps on chris who was sleeping

Mr. Kon: Sorry about that boy!

-he picks him up-

He yawns

-he pets the spot he stepped on-

Mr. Kon: Jenny, I'm gonna be back pretty late. I'll leave you girls some money to order some food.

He licks mr. Kon's face

-Mr. Kon holds Chris away from his face-

He whines

Mr. Kon: No licking the face.

Mr. Kon: You're adorable but no.

-he puts him down-

Jenifer: Where are you headed?

He stands on his hind legs

Mr. Kon: Oh I'm just going out to hang with a.. Friend.

Jea [in her room]: My shipping senses are tingling.

-she peeks her head out her room door- "Who's the girl?"

Chris didn't want him to go

-Mr. Kon heads out the door-

Jea: Aw, he didn't answer my question.

Jea: Where'd that Jeff guy go?

-Jenifer takes a broom then beats on the roof-

*jeff hears the beating and teleports down to jea's room* Wuzzup? i was up there forever

Jea: AH! OUT!!!

fine. jeez. *walks out into the hallway*

Chris whimpers

Jenifer: I swear you pop in there while she's changing, I'm gonna kill you.

Jenifer: What's wrong Chris?

"I didn't want him to leave..."

Jenifer: Now you're free to speak or return to your human form. And Jeff doesn't have to camp out in the roof.

*sarcastically says* damn. i liked it up there. all the heat and mold.

Chris laughs

Jenifer: By the way, how well could you hear us from up there?

all i heard was that knocking

-she sighs with relief-

and i heard someone yell

Jenifer: Oh yeah, that was me waking up my dad.

-there's a knock at the door-

should i hide?

-there's a voice from outside-

"that won't be necessary."

*shocked* what the fuck?

-Jenifer grabs a bat then creeps up to the door and opens it-

Man in lab coat and bow tie: Here's Johnny!

Jolly Johnny: God I love that movie.

damn that’s creepy as fuck.

Jea: AH IT'S THE GUY FROM THE COMIC!

Chris attacks him "GO AWAY"

-Jea puts on a tin foil hat-

Jolly Johnny: You know that doesn't work right?

"who are you?"

Jolly Johnny: Name's Jolly Johnny nice to meet ya, Jeff!

Chris jumps at him and scratches him

how the hell do you know who i am?

Jea: He's the psychotic psychic from my book!

ah got it

nice to meet ya psychotic psychic jolly johnny.

-Chris scratched an illusion-

Jolly Johnny: Calm down your "dog" or I'll have him kill himself.

ok don’t do that. i actually kinda like him

yo chris calm down

He growls and leaves to another room

Jolly Johnny: Wanna see a cool trick?

depends on what the trick is.

-Jolly Johnny mind controls Jeff to teleport a soda into his hands-

Jolly Johnny: Thanks.

*jeff not realizing he did this* whoah. you can teleport things to you?

Jolly Johnny: Yeah, let's go with that.

that’s awesome

Jea: How are you real!?

Jolly Johnny: That comic book you have was given to you by someone with A LOT of power. It's sort of a window into my life.

Jea: So the other characters are..

Jolly J: Yeap.

Jea: How come no one else can..

Jolly J: The person who gave it to you favors you.

so what are you doing here?

Jolly Johnny: I came here to meet y'all. You're crazy enough to drop people from roofs, Chris has the potential to kick ass but acts like a pussy, and Jea caught the eye of SIB.

Jea: SIB?

Jolly Johnny: The guy who gave you that book.

Chris barks at him

Jenifer: Wow, so I'm the only normal one here? -she shrugs-

yeah. that was hilarious and that idiotic normie deserved it.

Jolly Johnny: You people interest me but... I feel myself growing bored of you.

damn. harsh...

-Jea has a worried look-

ima go get food. *teleports away and then teleports back with ice cream in hand*

Jolly Johnny: Don't worry Jea. If I toyed with you, I'd likely get killed off.

*mouth full of ice cream* damn jea. what can you do?

Jolly Johnny: Oh no, not her. I'd be killed off by SIB. He's one of the only people who can actually kill me.

Jolly Johnny: He's over powered even for my taste.

well this dude sounds awesome *plops down on the couch*

so when do we get to meet SIB?

*stuffs mouth with ice cream*

Jolly Johnny: I literally know everything except that.

i doubt you know everything

Jolly Johnny: Their is a universe with beings who's power is to know everything except the future and I read their minds.

oh damn. fine. what’s my birthday?

Jolly Johnny: June 4th 2058.

holy shit

that’s creepy

Jolly Johnny: Even if I didn't read their minds, I'd know that from your mind.

true

well how’d you know i dropped someone off a roof. did you get that from reading my mind?

Jolly Johnny: I got that from Blake Taio. The art teacher.

oh that teacher who came up to the roof.

Jolly Johnny: Yep. He's on my list of minds I'm constantly reading.

whys he so special?

Jolly Johnny: I can't see ghosts, he can. I read his mind, I see ghosts.

Jolly Johnny: He's one of the original seven Divine Guardians.

Jolly Johnny: Oh you don't know what that is. Poor poor uneducated boy.

that’s awesome... and one of the what?

Jolly Johnny: The first seven Divine Guardians are the first Ultra Beings in each universe.

oh ok

Jolly Johnny: a Divine Guardian doesn't just have abilities though. When they die, they reincarnate.

are you one of those?

Jolly Johnny: Yes but I am not one of the original seven.

Jolly Johnny: I am the Guardian of minds.

Jolly Johnny: Your universe doesn't have a Guardian of Minds.

Jenifer: How do these "Divine Guardians" get their abilities?

Jolly Johnny: I'd tell ya but SIB wants that classified.

*sarcastically* can i be one? *chuckles*

Jolly Johnny: Possibly but at the moment, you're not strong enough. I became a guardian because I'm the strongest telepathy from my universe. And even then, it's a bit more complicated than that.

Jolly Johnny: There are 13 Divine Guardians in this universe and 14 from mine.

wow. i was joking, but i didn’t think you would say it’s possible

Jolly Johnny: The originals were born as Divine Guardians. All divine guardians that came after were born Ultra Beings and later became Divine Guardians.

-he yawns- "I've never been this bored before. I've been playing story teller for much too long."

Jolly Johnny: Jea, take a nap.

-she falls asleep-

Jolly Johnny: Time to have some fun. -he gains a creepy smile-

-Jolly Johnny turns and looks at Chris-

Jolly Johnny: Lets see what you've got mutt. -he tales out a knife and brainwashes him into returning to his human form-

aww cmon don’t hurt chris. he’s one of the few people i like.

Jolly Johnny: I don't plan to kill him. Just roughen him up a bit. That is, unless he decides to "man" up and fights back.

*thinks a bit about that soda thing* wait... how did you teleport something if you’re just a psychic?

Jolly j: The same way I just turned your dog into a human. By manipulating his powers

Jolly j: in other words, you gave it to me unintentionally

wait... i did that?

-something red appears in Jeff's hands-

#AST

0 notes

dudence-blog · 7 years

Text

Dear Dudence for 3 January 2018

My resolution for 2018 is to not change a thing because I’m awesome and totally cool with most of my problems. With some leftover champagne to motivate me it’s time for me to get on to the questions! Remember, if there’s anything you need to improve yourself it is to like Teh Dudence Facebook!

My cousin recently set me up on a date with a really great guy that she knew from work. At first, I was hesitant to go on a date with him as he is 43 and I am 27, however I decided to give him a chance and I was really glad I did. He’s smart, funny, and easy to hang out with. I am also very attracted to him physically. The only bad thing, so far, is that during a text conversation, he alluded to believing that 9/11 was an inside job.

Dear Conspiracy Theories, seriously? You met a real Truther? In the wild? Seriously? Sorry, not helpful. The other day I’d advised to not let political disagreements torpedo relationships. While you, me, most everyone might think your date is a whack job it really, shouldn’t, by itself be a killer. The problem will be that it’s not likely someone is only into 9-11 Truth. There’s a whole smorgasbord of whack-job ideas you can open your mind to once you believe your government is willing to kill thousands and there are at least as many people who are willing to go along with the lie. Anti-vax, Moon landings, Kennedy, Monsanto. The dude is 43, he’s probably not a newcomer to this idea, so he’s an old school Loose Change-sharing, “FIRE CAN’T MELT STEEL!” guy. I’m not going to tell you that you should cut him off over this, but it’s the sort of issue which is going to make for some awkward moments. Some very awkward moments. Like, imagine you told your normie friends you were dating a Scientologist.

Each year, my wife’s niece hosts a Christmas dinner for the entire, relatively large, family. Most years this is in the neighborhood of 40 people. Her mother-in-law is from another country, and they do a dinner theme around the mother-in-law’s native cuisine. The dinner and food are always very enjoyable, and we are sure to express our gratitude openly and often. This year, we received a text stating that we were required to bring $5 per person to cover the costs of the dinner. On one hand, I enjoy the meal, and I enjoy the family time, so I have no issue paying. The $40 it’s going to cost my family is not going to break the bank. On the other hand, this, to me, is rather rude. If you do not wish to host, then don’t. If you don’t wish to host so many, then don’t invite everyone.

Dear Holiday Hosting Etiquette, I’m going to side with your wife’s niece on this one. She’s preparing an ethnic cuisine meal for 40 people. This is well beyond the usual family-gathering etiquette of assigning a couple someones to bring the vegetable and starch sides. Like, right now, imagine you needed to prepare a meal for 40 people. Do you even have enough bowls to serve 40 people cereal? You know it would take 2 and a half gallons of milk to serve 40 people? Now, let’s take this to an entire holiday meal. And your wife wants to throw a hissy fit over $40? If you don’t want to go then don’t go, but don’t go and think that “Well, we tell her how grateful we are for her work” offsets the fact she’s probably out-of-pocket for well over $5/person.

Two weeks ago I attended a holiday party with my boyfriend and his family. We’ve been together for three years, and since we moved to his hometown, I’ve gotten to know his parents and sisters better. I forgot about new medication I was taking, had a few drinks, and became drunker than I have ever been in my life. (Counting this event, I’ve only been drunk three times, so it’s extremely out of character for me.) I now know that I did something so horrible at the party that my boyfriend broke up with me via text and told me he has no interest in speaking to me ever again. I’m devastated. My now ex-boyfriend is the sweetest man I know, so I had to have done something cruel for him to do this. But because he won’t talk to me, I have almost no idea of what I did or said. I am really afraid that I was mean to his sister Amanda, whom I’ve never liked.

Dear Out of Character Behavior, a three year relationship ended with a ghosting because of something you did while back-out drunk. It’s safe to say you went beyond “being mean to his sister”. Unless “being mean” is some understated code for “I went on an Anti-semitic tirade and then tried to murder her with a cordless drill”. You done fucked up and fucked up good. And it might be the sort of fuck up which you’re just never going to get the closure you want.

My youngest son has fallen madly in love with a very sweet and ambitious young woman his own age (late 20s). She has a Ph.D. in child psychology and is in her postdoc year. He’s a high-school history teacher with no debt. She’s now looking for permanent employment. But, she’s almost $500k in debt and told him it’s college loans. I’ve done some research and spoken with experts in the field, and we’ve concluded that it is probably loans as well as credit card debt. I want to have an open and frank discussion with my son about how this could impact him should he decide to marry her. But I don’t want to be an interfering mother.

Dear Son’s GF’s College Debt, too late. You passed “interfering” when you solicited professional guidance on how your son’s girlfriend might have paid for her education. Listen, any couple that is going to get serious needs to have a serious discussion about the finances. I think you’d be remiss in your role as a parent to not discuss with your son the importance of such a discussion. It’s not out-of-bounds for you to inquire about where your son thinks this relationship is going. So open with that. You’re making a whole lot of assumptions about where his relationship is, where it’s going, or even what he and she have already discussed. He told you she told him it was $500k in student loans. Maybe she told him a bit more detail but he relayed it to you as the less judgmental-inducing “Student Loans” instead of “Student Loans, Credit Card, and a Ford Mustang GT financed at 17%”.

“Eric” and I were together for five years and had a horrible breakup a year ago. While we were together I grew very close to his daughter “Amy,” and she to me. Amy’s mom has not been in the picture for many years. Amy took our breakup badly, and pretty much took my side in everything. We’ve kept in touch and often done things together since Eric and I split. We basically don’t discuss him. I last spoke to Amy early in September. Since then she hasn’t called or texted. I’ve tried to contact her several times, telling her I miss her and asking about getting together. No response. I’m pretty sure she’s ghosting me, and I suspect Eric worked on her, telling her what a horrible person I am.

Dear Missing “My” Daughter, you need to let it go. She’s an adult (I’m presuming because if you were sneaking a child out behind her parent’s back to maintain a relationship with them after you broke up that is a whole other level of toxic than whatever you describe of Eric) who has chosen her father over his ex-girlfriend. Maybe it was an ultimatium, maybe you weren’t as close as you thought, maybe she has moved on and found another woman with whom she can have the relationship you two had. Yes it sucks, just because someone you cared for has moved on from you. But, remember, love is an open door so keep it unlocked and maybe she’ll have a change of mind.

My boyfriend eats like an animal! Mouth open, uses his hands instead of the proper utensils, blows his nose at the dinner table, talks with his mouth full—the works! It grosses me out. If we’re at home, I generally turn up the music and try to block it out, but when we’re out it’s so embarrassing! We recently traveled to a foreign country and I was so shocked and embarrassed by his eating habits, I actually left the table and hid out in the bathroom.

Dear Animal Boyfriend, so, how did the “flee to the bathroom and hide” plan work? There’s no way that “Listen, I think your table manner are atrotious and it embarasses me to the point of retreat when I’m out in public with you” is not going to be a little bit of an awkward situation. If your response is as obvious as you describe it, there’s also little chance your boyfriend hasn’t noticed. What the heck did he say when the waiter asked if you wanted a refill on your drink when you were gone for 15 minutes? You could continue to resent him his behavior and maybe up the passive aggressiveness by choosing “My Fair Lady” next time you choose a movie on Netflix. Or you could try talking to him about what you’re observed and how his actions at the table make you feel. If it’s something he’s done for 30+ years it’s probably not going to be something he’s going to take to quickly, but at least you can do him the favor of no longer grinding your teeth in embarrassment at being seen with him in public.

I am getting married next spring, and my fiancé and I are very excited to move to the next phase of our relationship. Wedding planning has been surprisingly easy, save for my mother. My mother has an opinion on everything in that she wants everything to involve her. She wants to pick out music for her to be seated to. She wants my fiancé to walk her down the aisle to her seat. She wants to wear a white dress to the ceremony!

Dear My Mother Is Trying to…, have you considered trying to save money on the catering by going with a couple vegetarian options over the more expensive meat protein dishes? Before you go returning the money which makes the event you’re planning possible let’s take your mother at her word when she said “no strings”. Tell her you don’t want her to wear white and she gets the same processional music everyone else in the wedding party does. Well, unless she wants to walk down the aisle to “Gettin Jiggy Wit It”. That I would allow. If she pulls the “hey, I gave you $XX,XXX!” then you go ahead, thank her for the donation and refund it. All that being said let’s go ahead, back up, and take a holistic look at this. Will it actually ruin your wedding if, on the day of the event your mother gets a wild hair up her ass and decides to show up in a white dress too? Even after she said she wouldn’t? The only one who can make that ruin your day is you. Having the groom walk her down the aisle might be a bit much, but it’s not unheard of. Honestly, does anyone in the venue know any bridal processional other than The Bridal Chorus or Canon in D? Once those notes kick off no one is going to remember that your mother entered to a different classical instrumental.

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wolverinedoctorwho · 7 years

Text

long winded post about all my ocs bc i have nothing better to do and want people to ask me about them

I’m gonna put it under a Read More so if you don’t wanna read about my ocs you don’t have to scroll for a billion years

Published OCs:

Arcanamas (link is to book one, there are 6 books in the series currently)

Joan Arcanama: Southern momma, monster hunter, BAMF. Her parents are dead, her sister is dead, her family is full of monsters now. She’s doing ok with it though because she loves them and if you hurt them she WILL set you on fire. She and her whole “living” family live somewhere in Tennesee. She’s already witnessed the end/retcon of the world.

Avery: IDK what his last name is bc I stole him from someone else in an RP who left after like two chapters. He’s a big buff Scottish puff of a werewolf. Like Bigby Wolf in terms of hair and attractiveness, but he’s also kinda like Brian from Dream Daddy in terms of personality? He can fully turn at will, but usually chooses not to unless he has to fight somebody. During full moons he has his own room under their home to make sure he doesn’t hurt/scare the kids.

Tributa Arcanama: Lil baby vampire girl. She was turned when she was 3, and now she’s 10 but looks around 5 or 7. She looks about half her age because she ages twice as fast because it would be super inconvenient to be a vampire who was stuck at age three their entire life. She’s a fuckin loli but doesn’t even know what the heck a sex is because she’s like 10. She’ll also fuckin murder you if you’re a jerk. Her dream is to invent a new line of blood-flavored candies and drinks (like a sangueccino). Her name means Taxes in Latin.

Mort Arcanama: Tributa’s twin brother. Avery isn’t their father, but I don’t want Joan’s rape to make up too terribly much of her backstory so I don’t/won’t talk about it much. Mort is a necrokinetic, which is different from a necromancer because he doesn’t bring things back from the dead so much as he moves death around like a life force. He’s got a severed hand he treats as a pet and he keeps it alive by moving the “death force” into plants or animals, basically swapping their life force. Also anyone he touches will get hurt/die because he basically has no control over whether or not he takes the life force of things he touches. He’s a non-verbal Autistic, and his special interests include trains and plants. His name means Death in Latin.

Spark Arcanama (nee Ketchum): Originally a Pokemon OC, she was adopted by the Arcanamas fairly recently. She’s kinda like Mort in that she has no control over the fact that she can shoot fire out of her hands. She looks like a normal 12 year old girl but her skin can and will burn you and when her emotions flare up things tend to catch on fire (think Elsa but slightly more dangerous). Gloves don’t work for her because they’ll just catch fire, so she spends a lot of her time trying to keep her powers under wraps and freaking out about small things. She has a similar backstory to Hanako from Katawa Shoujo in that her house burned down, her parents died, and now she’s covered in scars, but she’s completely lost her right eye as a result of the burns and the lack of care she recieved for them. Basically everyone in the town she lived in blamed her for the fire and the death of her parents, and since they were right she allowed them to bully her for most of her life. Now that she’s away from all of that she’s learning how to become her own person without burning everything around her. She’s a cinnamon roll who doesn’t deserve sadness.

Forest Arcanama: Joan’s little sister. She died when she was about 14, and now she’s a ghost forever. She’s physically tied to Mort’s dead hand so she can’t go all crazy and poltergeisty. She’s got the personality of Lapis Lazuli because who cares about anything when you’re dead and stuck in a cabin in the middle of the woods? She died shortly after watching her mother die back before the reset/retcon and got stuck as a ghost.

Zack Gachano: Spark’s best friend and a total normie. He’s kind of obsessed with Vocaloid, to the point where he’s dyed his long hair purple to look like Gakupo. He has a single mom for reasons I haven’t fully come up with yet. He’s a little bit confused by all the monster stuff, but for some reason it’s not that crazy to him that his best friend shoots fire out of her hands and her siblings kill people. He’s a year older than Spark, and bisexual.

Louisanne de Malfoy: Originally a Harry Potter OC, she’s now a 307 year old vampire who lives in France and gives no shits about anything. Back in the day she had an apprentice/girlfriend, but that girl is long dead and so are all her past lovers. She’s pansexual but doesn’t use the term because it didn’t exist back in 1709. She studies all the time, IDK what for. She has one of those huge libraries with rolling ladders. She lives in this huge mansion because she’s amassed some sort of wealth during her life (probably from screwing rich people and then blackmailing them). She’s uptight, but has a heart every once in awhile. Tributa’s mentor and godmother to the Arcanama kids.

StarStar (Link is to book one, there are 4 books in the series)

Miranda Picard: Originally a Star Trek OC, she’s almost as uptight as Louisanne if not more. She’s a navy kid with a bright future ahead of her, but she has a horrible temper and is a total fuddy-duddy. She’s really smart though. Her interests include ballet and playing the violin, and she can do both at once. She tends to overwork herself to the point of collapsing without even thinking about it, and always hates on herself for the smallest of mistakes. Under her stuck-up interior is a teen who just wants to enjoy herself and wants people to be proud of her. Her grandfather is a prominent captain, and she refuses to call him anything other than Captain, much to his chagrin.

Dannika Solo: Originally a Star Wars OC, she’s Miranda’s laid-back counterpart with even more emotional scarring. She ran away from her air force parents as a child and was kidnapped pretty quickly. She was hurt in a variety of ways before being turned into a fairy, and it took her a lot of work to learn how to turn back. After she killed her kidnapper but spared his daughter, she went through a variety of bad situations before meeting Miranda. She’s got PTSD from the whole thing and frequently has nightmares and bouts of sleepwalking. She’s kind of a grouch when she’s upset, but she’s just as smart as Miranda. Her parents don’t really approve of her and Miranda’s relationship.

Teendangers (this doesn’t update often)

Wendy: The eldest of the three superpowered sisters. She’s highly suspicious of adults and is the kind of person who refuses help unless she desperately needs it. Protects her younger sisters with an almost antagonistic ferocity. She’s 18. Her full name is Gwendolyn. Her superpower is flight.

Mags: The middle sister. She’s more reasonable, but is still pretty cautious because she’s seen some shit. The most motherly of the three sisters. She’s very blunt, though rarely out of malice. She’s 15. Her full name is Margarita. Her superpower is invisibility.

Ren: The youngest sister. She’s a total ditz, and sometimes it’s easy to wonder if she has any thoughts in that head of hers. She’s more susceptible to illness because she was put on the streets when she was a baby. She trusts easily, much to Wendy’s frustration. She’s 7. Her full name is Renee. Her superpower is luminescence.

Molly: A trans girl with no superpowers other than a positive attitude and a willingness to help people. She likes cartoons, some of which include anime, but she isn’t a total otaku/weeaboo or anything like that. She’s about 15.

Jemma: Molly’s mom. Her husband works for the agency that contains superpowered children, but she doesn’t approve of his job or the politics behind it. She’s in her mid 30s and is a Cool Mom.

Unpublished OCs:

Homestuck: (these don’t jive with actual canon facts too well, sorry)

Ocarina Marxochime: A cinnamon roll with lavender blood because I had an ocarina that color when I came up with her. She’s a blind seadweller with asthma, synesthesia, hydrophobia, and haphephobia. She had an abusive lusus who tried to make Ocarina live up to a standard of royalty she could not meet, and through beating her and starving her tried to make her obedient. She ended up an anxious mess, and then she was kidnapped by some other trolls, who raped her, mutilated her fins, sewed her gills shut, and tried to drown her. She met Exdeus in the hospital afterwards, and moved in with Raina after she was released. She’s been trying recently not to be such an anxious mess, but stuff like that takes time. Her symbol is the Anxiety Awareness ribbon and her horns look like (and function as) ocarinas.

Raina Heist: A black-blood (seriously, I came up with a whole essay on shade-bloods) troll who was kicked off Alternia as a grub and somehow wound up on Earth. She was raised in Texas by a human couple who tried to convince themselves she wasn’t a demon. She spent most of her life covering her unique features with makeup and hats and contacts, but still got bullied for being different. During one fight with a bully, she stabbed him with her horns and then ran away from home, living in a shopping mall for a year before being found and raped (a lot of my OCs backstories include rape for some reason? I’ve recently realized just how much it pops up and would like to change it so they don’t all become the same in terms of backstory) by one of the employees. When she wound up in the hospital afterwards, she told her parents she needed to find out where she belonged, and then somehow got back to Alternia. She’s now Ocarina’s roommate who doesn’t take any shit from anyone. She’s also a great cook. Her symbol is an @ sign.

Exdeus Machina: He’s a human (despite his odd name) who works in the hospital Ocarina went to after her mutilation. Whether through Florence Nightingale syndrome or sheer plot convenience, he fell in love with her and she reciprocated. He’s her anchor, essentially.

Purr: Ocarina’s pet cat, essentially a therapy animal, given to her by one of my friend’s OCs

Daphne Machna: Exdeus and Ocarina’s adopted daughter. She wants to become a doctor like her father, and has the brains for it, but sometimes she goes too far to prove herself. She has tetrochromia and wears glasses she doesn’t need to to match her parents, who both wear glasses.

Steven Heist: Goes by Steve. Raina’s son after a one-night-stand with some blue-blood. He has the horns and blood to match. He’s laid back and very musical, and gets along with his mother really well. His symbol is currently a # symbol, though I might change it.

SkyeNet (Name pending)

Skye: A trans boy whose special interest is computers and technology. I’ve described him as hypomental bc there was a cool article on that I read. Net’s twin brother, but he’s the more grounded and responsible of the two. He’s kind of Asbergers? IDK don’t quiz me too hard on it I’m basing his behaviour on my older brother. He has a scar on his right cheek and on his left shoulder from a car accident.

Net: Kinda crazy, not gonna lie. I’ve described her as hypermental to yin-yang with Skye. She’s possessive of him and at first didn’t support his transition because she feared she wouldn’t be as close to her her sister anymore. I’m not sure how to describe her mental state other than saying that after Skye’s car accident she cut her face and shoulder open so she could have scars just like his.

Honestly their whole story is part of an AU with Ocarina and Exdeus so I couldn’t really publish their story if I wanted to without untangling that whole knot

Dungeons and Dragons

Spah: Literally just Spy from TF2. I didn’t want to come up with a whole character and backstory so I just used Spy. He’s a changeling rogue and a kinky fucker who literally beat Venomfang by fucking him.

Favric: Stole him from a campaign. He was one of Venomfang’s followers until Spah convinced him that, because he fucked Venomfang, he was his god now. Favric’s essentially his human squire now.

Vyerith: Stole her from the same campaign Favric came from. Basically there was a doppleganger and Spah went “I’m gonna tap that” and I just kept rolling good saves until the end of the battle and the DM went “well, I guess you can keep her now”. She and Spah have kinky shapeshifter sex.

Dell: Basically Engineer from TF2 but different. He grew up with Spah and some other friends, and his Pyro-expy-love died in a fire that convinced him to run away from home and live in a cave. He’s a half-orc artificer who’s kind of a grouch but is really a depressed noodle.

Khoren: My favourite right now. She’s a little warforged cinnamon roll. Dell found her while scavenging one day and rebuilt her. She’s essentially got the mind of a child and is 3′6 so it works. She has a Drawer of Holding built into her stomach (a bag of holding installed in a drawer). She’s the one that walks down the hill Dell lives on to get food and supplies from the nearby townspeople. They love her and made her a pink wig. She can’t speak, but has her own language of various whistles that Dell taught her.

There’s also a whole Mermaid RP that a friend and I did that’s choc-full of OCs but I think I should make a separate post for that because it’s also kind of an AU of the Homestuck characters and isn’t published or done yet and it’s a mess. But if you’ve gotten this far thanks for reading, pls ask me about them and if you want to draw them ask me and i’ll give you referencesnngggg

#personal #ocs #long post

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