#2. he'd 100% get off on hearin me list it all like i'm just callin myself names
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could a could a could a quick fuck be a sedative it's relative
#i need to not get dependent on it but#i'll be havin literal insomnia n it's like he flicks a switch in my brain n i'm out like a fucking light#my other option bein extra meds or just not sleepin n that's not good for me either#especially cause sleep deprivation makes me do the whole paranoia spiral#but i mean it's probably cause i feel like i've done my ~responsibilities~ for the day n that's not smth i need to be reinforcing#just hhhrrrgggghhhh maybe it'd be fine if it stopped there but it never does he's gonna start expecting more#it's like he's planning to go through his entire list of degrading things to call me to see what he can get away w/#tryin out one per night n i'll go don't call me that n he shrugs it off n tries out a different one the next time#n unfortunately that's where his creativity peaks so chances are i'll get tired of objecting before he runs out of em#i could just list everythin i don't wanna be called in one go but 1. he's just gonna think of new ones#2. he'd 100% get off on hearin me list it all like i'm just callin myself names#'i don't mean it like that it's not a bad thing' bitch. yknow that thing you're always tellin me? how you know i'm not _that_ stupid? yea.#spdrvent
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