#...so any notion of 'identity can be fluid' reads like 'your queerness is a flaw and a horrible thing'... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

uncanny-tranny · 1 year ago

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Two things that are simultaneously true:

1. Gender and sexuality are complex and can be fluid. An identity isn't always fixed and can change with time for many reasons

2. It is not acceptable to force others to change their gender or sexuality and the mantra that they (queer people) can change if they only "try hard" is both cruel and homophobia and/or transphobia

#queer #lgbt #lgbtq #homophobia #homophobia tw #transphobia #transphobia tw #when i first came out as trans i was told this story about how my dad's therapist had a lesbian client with homophobic parents...#...how her parents were *so close* to coming to terms with her lesbianism and she got a boyfriend and look! she changed so why couldn't you!#the thing that was so fucked up about that story was that it was presented as 'oh you don't know who you are! you'll change!'#and i was never listened to until i went 'so far' in my transness that changing was impractical...#...it never enforced that my sense of self is dynamic but that who i was is something to be 'fixed'#i think a lot of queer people are hostile to the idea of gender/sexuality fluidity because it's framed in such a way...#...that tells them that their queerness will eventually be 'cured'...#...so any notion of 'identity can be fluid' reads like 'your queerness is a flaw and a horrible thing'...#...but that's not the solution to people whose identity has fluctuated and changed...#...it isn't their fault that queerphobes latched onto them as 'case studies' to prove that queerness is curable...#...a queerphobe would latch onto ANYTHING in order to prevent you from living...#...'oh lesbians married men in order to protect themselves? why can't you do that?! why must you insist on marrying a woman?!'...#...that's an example of how they'd just latch onto something else if 'identity is dynamic' didn't exist #the context of 'identity is dynamic' is often one of the most important factors in if it is meant as queer-afirming or not ime

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