#...a significant amount of this was put together while staying up until 2am watching fall out boy amvs. yes it's 2023.

[ouronlyangelhes]

Will It Get Easier?: Harry Styles One Shot

When you had thought of the person that you were going to spend the rest of your life with, you always imagined it would be Harry. Nobody else ever came to mind. He had all of the qualities that you knew would make him the best husband and father. For years, that’s all you two talked about, getting married and eventually starting a family. Until one day, those talks seemed like a distant memory of a life you almost had. A little after three years together, you and Harry parted ways.

Both of you had been burnt out and not fully invested in the relationship anymore. With the crazy antics of life the little things turned into big arguments and nothing seemed to work anymore. It had been a little over seven months since thing ended between the two of you. No break up is ever easy, but this one has proven to be extremely difficult. Harry was someone that you never wanted to picture having to get over. He was the one you pictured getting married to and going on family vacations with. You had been doing your best to move forward with your life and let go of your relationship with him.

It’s not easy. It takes time to slowly forget all of those memories and plans you’d made together. It takes time to let go of the past and be okay with moving ahead. It was the days when you would find one of his old tee shirts or a Polaroid from a trip you’d taken together that would hit you the hardest. You weren’t one of those exes who burned and got rid of things belonging to your ex significant other. Things had ended in a sad but mutual way and you will always have a tremendous amount of love in your heart for him.

For the first few weeks after the two of you broke up, Harry would call you late after he’d been out with his friends to tell you how much he missed you. The calls slowly began to decrease, while you had enjoyed being something that was on his mind you were happy knowing that he was finally being able to let go.

At least you thought he was letting go.

It’s Friday night and you had decided to go to bed early to catch up on some rest.

You heard your doorbell going off around 2am accompanied by aggressive knocking on the door. You made your way down the stairs and turned on the light, you looked through the peep hole to find Harry.

“What the hell are you doing Harry, it’s 2 in the morning?” You asked sounding annoyed.

“‘M drunk and I missed yeh. Can I come in?” He asked you.

“Yeah I guess.” You said as you opened the door further.

“I was just out and I realized how close I was to your place so I thought of you. I just wanted to check and see how you’ve been.” He asked as he sat down on your couch.

“I’ve been fine Harry. I am glad you stopped by and that you’re okay but you can’t do this. You can’t be here.” You said.

“I know I shouldn’t but I missed you. I love you and I just wanted to make sure that you were good.” He said.

“You just can’t show up here and the middle of the night and tell me that you love me. We’re broken up. You’re not suppose to say things like that. I’m trying to get over you and that’s really freaking hard when you show up here.” You said.

“Maybe we aren’t suppose to get over each other. We made a mistake in breaking up. You know that we should be together. Remember how great we were. We talked about marriage and kids and I never wanted that with anyone else.”

“We used to be good. But that’s the point we were good until we weren’t anymore. I can’t go through this again with you. It hurt too bad. I can’t do this rollercoaster of emotions, I was finally doing ok and here you are again showing up at my door. It’s not ok.” You said to him.

“I get it. I’ll go.” He said as he got up off the couch.

“No! You’ve been drinking you don’t need to be out this late wandering around anyways. Just stay. You can sleep on the couch and leave in the morning.” You said as you opened the closet to grab some blankets out for Harry.

“Thanks.” He said as he watched you make up the couch for him.

You turned the light off in the living room and headed up the stairs towards your room. You were all tucked in when you heard a knock at your bedroom door.

“Y/N.” Harry said as he opened the door.

“Yeah, what’s up?” You asked him.

“Can I stay in here with you? I know that I shouldn’t be asking you for anything I’ve already intruded enough, I just miss you. Just for tonight. One last cuddle. I promise I will behave myself.” Harry said to you.

“Yeah, I guess. Come here.” You said as you motioned for him.

“I miss cuddling with you.” He said as he cozied up next to you, just like he use to. He was always so warm and so cuddly. He had this way of making you feel so secure and loved all at the same time. That was something you had missed for sure. But you couldn’t allow yourself to miss it too much or you would fall back into the old swing of things.

“I know you do.” You said trying to avoid too much emotion.

“Goodnight.” Harry said as he pressed a kiss to your shoulder.

“Goodnight Harry.” You said back to him.

To be honest it was one of the best nights of sleep you had in a while. Sleeping next to Harry was always something that you’d enjoyed and now you were going to have to go back to living without that. You woke up and found the bed empty and cold beside you. All that remained of Harry from last night was a note that he had left on the pillow.

Thank you again for putting up with me last night. I really don’t know what came over me and caused me to come by your place but thanks for not turning me away. I guess I just really needed to see you. I’m sorry if me coming by caused you any disruption or put you out in anyway. It was good to see you again. Let’s try to catch up one day when we are in a better place. H xx

You knew better place meant when he would no longer say “I love you” without feeling an intense amount of love for you. To be honest, you didn’t know if you’d ever be able to hang out with Harry. The feelings that you had for him were ones that consumed every bone in your body. Harry wasn’t someone you could simply get over. He was someone you were going to learn how to live without.

Four more agonizing months had passed since Harry paid that unexpected visit to your house in the middle of the night. You hadn’t heard from him since. You didn’t know if that meant he was moving on or if he was struggling was much as you were. You were trying to not think about him, you really were. As soon as you found yourself moving forward he would sneak back into your life somehow.

You came home from work to find a letter addressed to you in Harry’s handwriting. You were slightly hesitant to open it as you weren’t sure of what you were going to find. Was it going to be a love letter? An invitation of sorts? A card?

The not knowing was killing you so you decided to open it. Inside you found a concert ticket and a backstage pass to Harry’s upcoming final show of his tour. Inside there was a small note. It’d mean the world to me if you could make. If not, I understand. I would just mean everything to have you there. Hope to see you. H x

Of all the things you’d be expecting this wasn’t one. Harry had been busy touring the last first months promoting his new solo album. He was doing amazing. You had heard the album of course when it had come out and couldn’t help but feel a few jabs in your chest as it was like reliving your relationship all over again and it’s downfall.

You were proud. Beyond proud of the music he had worked so hard to make. Lyrically, musically, and technically it was all perfect and very Harry. Part of you wanted to just pretend you never got the tickets and not show up. But you had to go. He wanted you there. Maybe there was a future of the two of you being able to just be friends. Maybe this was Harry’s way of making the first step in making a friendship? You weren’t sure but you knew you couldn’t just skip out on something like this.

It was his final show of his very successful solo world tour. He had been there for you more times than you could count over the years and you needed to be there for this for him.

You looked at the tickets and the show was tomorrow night. You had to do a lot to mentally prepare to see him again.

You began to get ready for the concert. You changed your outfit at least five times, unsure of what to wear. You didn’t know why you were still trying to impress him. You weren’t together anymore, it shouldn’t matter and you shouldn’t care what he thinks. But you still do. You were very nervous. You really didn’t know what the night had in store and that caused you to feel a little anxious.

As usual, the show was off to an amazing start. He had this way of captivating the audience with every single thing he did. You couldn’t help but feel the sting when he sang certain lyrics that recalled your relationship. The show was coming to an end and you stood beside Jeff for most of it. You had run into Anne briefly and chatted for a bit. You wanted to avoid having a long conversation with her because you knew it would bring up way too many old memories.

Jeff mentioned to you that you could go wait in Harry’s dressing room for him as soon as he got off the stage. You decided to go ahead and head back there.

You sat down on the couch in the dressing room to wait for him.

“I didn’t know if you’d show up or not. I really appreciate it that you’re here!” Harry said as he entered the dressing room.

“Yeah of course! I wouldn’t miss it for anything.” You said.

“I know it was selfish to invite you here after all that’s happened. I mean the last time we saw each other was because I showed up drunk at your door. But I couldn’t imagine sharing this night with anyone else. I just really wanted you here.” He confessed to you.

“Well, I am glad that you invited me. The show was great, really something else. I’m glad to have been able to see a small part of it.”

“You’ve seen more than a small part. You’ve been the inspiration behind this whole album. I want you to thank you for the person that you’ve been in my life. I can’t imagine being where I am today without you.” He said as he hugged you. It felt weird to be this close to him after such a long time. But it still felt right.

“Thank you. I really appreciate it. It means a lot to hear that. It’s just weird you know, being here looking back on us. I just don’t know if I wanna look back anymore. I don’t know.”

You said trying to understand your feelings.

“Are you saying you wanna give things another try?” He asked hopefully.

“I mean, I want to. If you would. Just lowkey, no rush, just taking things as they come. What do you say?” You asked.

“Hell Yeah! Come here!” He said as he kissed you. This time apart had been hard but maybe it was everything the two of you needed to be closer than ever before.

[earthbounddreamers]

Ask meme - Scarlet

Here’s all 100 questions from that ask meme for @atrue-whovian cause he’s insane This one is for Scarlet James is next Have fun I’m on mobile so I can’t put it under a cut rip

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1. What do they smell like? She usually smells of masculine deodorant (that feminine stuff is bullshit and expensive) and/or sweat.

2. What is their voice like? Her voice is somewhat feminine but mostly deep, very intimidating and loud.

3. What is their biggest motivator? She wants to make sure all her friends - who are now family - are safe and happy.

4. What is their most embarrassing memory? When she thought she was flirting with a gay girl but she was actually straight and was suuuper embarrassed when she tried to ask her on a date.

5. How do they deal with/react to pain? Usually she just swears loudly, takes a deep breath, applies pressure for a moment, then controls it with harsh breathing to channel her pain. If it needs treatment she applies first aid while swearing the entire time. If adrenaline is high and she’s in danger she doesn’t consciously react, and though her body might flinch she doesn’t even feel it.

6. What do they like to wear? Baggy masculine clothes most of the time, band merch and sweat pants, sometimes jeans but they’re always torn. Other times she wears tight fitting workout clothes or just a tank top and shorts to show off the guns.

7. Which of their relationships have impacted them most positively? Sam was the first person to make her start exploring herself, give a second thought to the things running through her head. Sam helped start her healing process, even if it was a little slow. While all her relationships have helped in different ways, Sam really started it all.

8. What’s the weirdest thing they’ve ever eaten? Once when she was high someone caught a grasshopper and cooked it over the fire - cooked being a generous word - and she ate it without hesitation. Don’t do drugs kids.

9. Describe the way that they sleep. Sprawled out, snoring loudly, usually with an arm wrapped around Sam.

10. What is their favorite food/kind of food? She loves hamburgers with all the toppings you can fit on it. Five Guys, Burger Factory, that kinda thing is her shit. She loves going to fast food joints and ordering the craziest combinations.

11. What do they feel most insecure about? Her abilities in anything really. She hates herself the moment she can’t do something. Even if it’s something small like playing a stupid Mario Party minigame she needs to be able to do it.

12. How do they like to dress? Masculine and functional, looking good and ready to kick ass.

13. How do they react to feelings of guilt? Beats herself up infinitely, hates herself and never really talks about it until someone convinces her to and then they can hopefully comfort her.

14. How do they react to/deal with betrayal? Initially wants to kill them. Then wants to beat the shit out of them. Eventually like, four years later, gets over it.

15. What is their greatest achievement? Breaking out if the institution and making it home safe, that was badass and awesome.

16. What are they like when they’ve gotten too little sleep? Irritable and cranky. Throws back coffee and energy drinks to help stay awake until she eventually crashes and passes out.

17. What are they like when they’re drunk? Depressed, nostalgic for better times. She cries a lot and apologizes for everything ever. A sad sight to see, really.

18. What kind of music do they enjoy? Hard rock and heavy metal. She wants to feel the bass in her bones and rock the fuck out. Has a soft spot for a few softer bands but usually refuses to admit it.

19. Are they right or left handed? She was born like technically left handed, but due to the missing finger she quickly took to using her right hand.

20. Fears? Scared of losing people. Scared of disappointing her friends. Scared of becoming like her parents. Scared of hurting those she loves.

21. Favorite kind of weather? Windy and somewhat sunny, but not too bright. She loves the rain too.

22. Favorite color? Red, which was probably obvious.

23. Do they collect anything? She tends to keep bottle caps around, accumulating a pile in her room until Sam inevitably recycles them all and she has to start anew.

24. Do they prefer either hot or cold weather more? Cool but not cold weather.

25. What is their eye color? Pale blue like iceberg water.

26. What is their race/ethnicity? White, specifically white trash by birth.

27. Hair color? Dark brown, likes to dye it red.

28. Are they happy where they are currently? Living with Sam and Max in a decent apartment with a decent job, she’s happy.

29. Are they a morning person? Not in the least. She’s basically a zombie before 11am.

30. Sunrise or sunset? Sunset, she likes knowing darkness is right around the corner.

31. Are they more messy or more organized? Messy, everything has it’s place - wherever it happens to be dropped.

32. Pet peeves? When people follow rules like it’s the law - even when it’s literally the law. See: Refusing to jaywalk Taking off hats in restaurants Never walking on the road even when it’s 2am and nobody else is awake jesus christ live a little dude

33. Do they own any objects of significant personal importance? She still has this little bracelet Sam gave her when they were like 12. It’s made of silver and has a little S engraved in it. She refuses to admit she still has it.

34. Least favorite food? She can’t stand salad. Why would you eat leaves?

35. Least favorite color? Orange. Never did care much for it.

36. Least favorite smell? Like 99% of perfumes, they just smell like chemicals to her.

37. When was the last time they cried? Last week she had a nightmare and some traumatic memories came back and she couldn’t help but cry.

38. Were they with anybody the last time they cried? She woke Sam up without meaning to and they comforted her.

39. Tell us about one of the times they got injured? She and Max were playing chicken, running straight at each other until someone bailed out. Nobody bailed out. She got her forehead cut open and Max got a huge bruise on his cheek.

40. Do they have any scars? Jesus does she ever. Scar across her left cheek, left ear reconstructed from skin grafts, scars up and down her arms and thighs from self harm, leg amputated above right knee, scars on her stomach from when her mother attacked her, burn marks across her back, and she’s missing her left index finger from a birth defect. We call her Scar for a reason.

41. Do they struggle with any mental health issues? Major depression and anger issues, as well as other shit left over from emotional and physical abuse. She’s pretty broken. On antidepressants but they aren’t quite enough, she’s doing her best.

42. Do they have any bad habits? Drinks too much (working on it though), used to smoke weed too much, leaves in the middle of the night without warning and worries everyone to death.

43. Why might someone dislike them? Lots of reasons. Resting bitch face, defensive and rude, she’s very loud and refuses to apologize for who she is

44. Why might someone love them? She has a lot to talk about. She’s intensely loyal and will protect you with her life. Once you realize what she’s working to fight through, she’s trying her hardest to be a good person. She’s a fight worth fighting for.

45. Do they believe in ghosts? She believes that if someone dies in a bullshit way they’ll stick around until they’re satisfied.

46. Is there anyone they would trust with their lives? Any four of her best friends. Sam, Max, James, and Simon alike she’d trust with her life.

47. Are they romantically interested in anyone? She loves Sam.

48. Are they dating/married to anyone? Sam is her gorgeous partner and she loves her very much.

49. Do they like surprises? She would if she could be awake enough to enjoy them. When she stays up for an all nighter she loves watching the sunrise.

50. When is their birthday? August 18th, summer child.

51. How do they usually celebrate their birthday? Used to drink the night away, now gets friends together to eat cake and junk food and watch good-bad movies

52. Do they have any family? Parents are long gone. This gang of misfits is her new family. A bunch of brothers and a beautiful partner.

53. Are they close to their family? Biological family no, she wants nothing to do with them. Her new family definitely.

54. What is their MBTI type? I’d say ISTP, the Virtuoso. I think it suits her well.

55. What is their zodiac sign? She’s a Leo but can literally never remember her sign.

56. What Hogwarts House would they be in? Gryffindor, like the cliche kicking down the door Gryffindor.

57. What D&D alignment are they? Chaotic neutral-good. She wants to be good, but only when it concerns her or her friends.

58. Do they ever have nightmares? If so, what about? The infinite amount of hit that has happened to her still haunts her every week or two, usually waking her up in the middle of the night.

59. What are their views on death? Pretends not to care, actually scared of what might be waiting.

60. What is something that they’re sure to laugh at? Any stupid joke for pun. Like what’s a fish without an eye? Her favourite joke.

61. When bored, how do they pass time? She works out, drinks, gets high, or just sleeps. She’ll also cuddle with Sam then fall asleep.

62. Do they enjoy being outside? Yeah, she loves the outdoors. She’ll get cranky if it’s too hot though.

63. Do they have an accent? She’s got the typical American/Canadian accent that doesn’t sound like an accent when you’re in north america. She has a few words out of the stereotypical Canadian accent but you’re dead if you point it out.

64. Upon seeing a slice of chocolate cake, what is their first reaction? Step one: acquire cake Step two: ingest

65. If they knew they were going to die, what would they do/say? She’d be terrified, crying as she spends every moment she can with all her friends. Telling and hearig stories, terrified that she’ll be forgotten.

66. How do they feel about sex? She enjoys it but doesn’t need it. Really depends on her partner.

67. What is their sexuality? She’s bisexual, leaning towards female and nonbinary people.

68. Do they become squeamish at the sight of blood? No way, blood can’t phase her at this point. She’s stitched and bandaged too many wounds to care about blood anymore.

69. Is there anything that they find really gross? Rotten food, just the sight of it makes her want to puke, and the smell will definitely make her puke.

70. Which TV Trope(s) best describes them? The cold-hearted bully who actually has a Tragic Backstory and can’t cope with it. Just needs someone to understand her.

71. Do they enjoy helping people? Her friends, yes. Sometimes strangers, but usually busy taking care of herself.

72. Are they allergic to anything? Nope, her immune system is chill.

73. Do they have a pet? James has Pequeño and she’s basically his aunt. She also has a rose haired tarantula named Princess she keeps in her room. Sam pretends they aren’t terrified of Princess.

74. Are they quick to anger? What are they like when they lose their temper? She’ll get angry in a heartbeat. She has two possibilities when angry: brooding and internalizing it all, or yelling and screaming until she ends up breaking down crying (usually someone is bleeding at this point).

75. How patient are they? She isn’t.

76. Are they good at cooking? Good enough. Nothing special but it’s pretty good.

77. Favorite insult? Do they insult people often? All the time. Big fan of “go die in a barn fire” and “who’s this clown?”

78. How do they act when they’re particularly happy? She’s grinning, laughing at everything and loud as can be.

79. What do they do when they learn about other people’s fears? She’s super careful to protect them from it and try not to mention that stuff.

80. Are they trustworthy? If you’re established as friends, she will die before she betrays you.

81. Do they try to hide their emotions? Are they good at it? She hides them on instinct, and is good at first but everything quickly overwhelms her and shows through.

82. Do they exercise regularly? All the time.

83. Are they comfortable with the way they look? She’s not terribly confident, but comfortable with her looks. She doesn’t plan on changing.

84. What are some physical features that they find attractive on people? She loves their arms, like muscular or small and dainty she loves the shoulders, biceps, forearms, hands. Can’t get enough.

85. What kind of personalities do they find attractive? Calm, helpful personalities, but still enough energy to go out and have fun. She wants someone to balance her out, but have fun when they can

86. Do they like sweet foods? In small amounts, she usually prefers salty or savory stuff.

87. What is their age? She’s 18.

88. Are they tall or short or somewhere in between? Damn tall, she’s 6’3”.

89. Do they wear glasses or contacts? Nope, her eyes are fine.

90. Do they consider themselves attractive? Somewhat, but not much.

91. What is their sense of humor like? Usually based on stupid puns and morbid jokes.

92. What mood are they most often in? Used to be depressed like 24/7, now is actually happy or at least content for the most part.

93. What kinds of things anger them? Basically anything, but especially people being rude, at least as she perceives.

94. Outlook on life? Kinda shitty but she’s stuck here so she might as well make the best of it.

95. What kind of things make them sad/depressed? Life. Basically anything. Anything had the potential to be sucked into the depressive vortex and made to be depressing.

96. What is their greatest weakness? Being insecure in herself. Also girls.

97. What is the greatest strength? Fighting for what she believes in.

98. Something that they regret? The years spent drunk and high that she could have been enjoying.

99. Biggest accomplishment? Getting out of the institution with James and Simon, alive and well.

100. Create your own! Ask anything you’d like!