#... i must add i just managed to get some heat creme in my eye... let's not talk about it...

[saintedbythestorm]

I'm already trying to stay awake. My legs and shoulder (sometimes arms too) be giving me trouble. I've already had to take a top up of the migraine meds....

And yet... my dumb ass... be laying here like... yeah I could totally change the mattress right now.

I am working so hard on talking myself out of it. I am also losing.

[great-jenna-bake-off]

Season 3 Episode 9: Fraisier Cake

I thought working from (and spending literally all my time at) home would give me more time to bake, but then I got a puppy and my life got turned upside down. She's very cute, but man does she take up a lot of time that I could otherwise be spending baking. Or eating. So maybe it's for the best that I got a puppy.

Anyway, I finally managed to get my act together long enough to make my next bake: a Fraisier cake. We're getting toward the end of the season, so the technical bakes are getting harder and more esoteric. I have certainly never heard of a Fraisier cake, let alone eaten one, but at first glance it didn't look... that hard? It's basically a sponge cake with some creme patissiere, decorated with fresh strawberries and marzipan. How hard could that be? (Famous last words...)

https://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/fraisier_cake_75507

The first step was to make the actual cake portion of the Fraisier cake. The recipe calls for "self-raising flour", and after a few recent improvisations with less than ideal results, I decided to just shell out for the actual ingredient. However, this new strategy hit a speed bump when the recipe called for an "electric hand whisk", which, as mentioned previously, I do not own. No matter; surely I could kick it old-school and rely on my own brute strength to mix the cake ingredients by hand as they heated on the stove top.

This will definitely not create any problems for me down the line...

Editor’s Note: If you’re thinking to yourself, some of these pictures seem smaller than usual, you would be correct. If you’re also thinking to yourself, Jenna is probably too lazy to figure out how to resize them and make them consistent, you are also correct. 

According to the recipe, I would be done when the mixture had doubled in volume and was pale in color.

Looks pale to me?

Next, it was time to add the all-important self raising flour.

Gently folded in as to keep in the air that I painstakingly whipped up by hand.

And voila; cake batter was ready to go into the oven.

Looks good so far!

I thought I was off to a good start, but as soon as my cake came out of the oven, I realized I was in trouble. The recipe specifies that the cake should be about 2 inches in height, as you need to slice it in half to make two layers. Mine was... not.

It's like... half an inch, maybe?

Uh oh. Maybe that hand whisking didn't do the trick after all. Still, the cake looked reasonably tasty, so I decided to just move on and start my creme patissiere. First, I had to boil my milk and vanilla pod.

This smelled really nice.

Then it was time for some more whisking: this time of eggs, cornflour, sugar, and kirsch, which is a cherry-flavored brandy.

Fun fact: kirsch is pretty disgusting on its own. Wilson volunteered to drink what I didn't use in this recipe, which was fine by me as it tasted like nail polish remover. Do not recommend.

Finally, I had to whisk the egg mixture and the hot milk together.

My whisking arm is getting a workout today.

Then, I needed to put the mixture back on the stove and watch it very carefully, as in about four minutes the mixture would thicken very quickly. Well, four minutes came and went, and nothing happened. I diligently kept my eye on it, but it definitely did not appear to be approaching a texture that was "thick enough to pipe", per the recipe.

Nothing happening yet...

So finally, I committed a cardinal GBBO sin. I took my eye off the stove for JUST A MINUTE to wash the dishes. And when I came back, my creme patissiere had turned into this:

Uh oh.

I have never made a creme patissiere before. But I have eaten it, and I know it's not supposed to be THIS thick. It's supposed to be velvety and creamy and delicious, while this was more of an... eggy gloop? But hey, it was certainly thick enough to pipe. Maybe the next step of adding butter would help.

Spoiler alert: it didn’t!

So my creme patissiere looked like mashed potatoes. If I were on the show, this is where I would realize I had gone horribly wrong and would toss this creme in the bin before starting over. But, given that I would not actually be serving my food to Paul and Mary, I decided to soldier on. After all, at least my creme was thick enough to pipe. Maybe this was what I was supposed to do after all? So I stuck the creme patissiere in the fridge to cool and crossed my fingers that I would somehow have a delicious, smooth creme when it came out.

Maybe this doesn’t look so bad??

The final step before assembly was to make a lemon syrup, which thankfully was pretty simple after all the missteps I’d already made in this recipe. However, I soon found myself facing another problem: I needed to roll out a layer of marzipan to put on top of my cake, but I had left my rolling pin at Wilson’s house (we made a chicken pie). Luckily, I had a substitute:

When in doubt, break out the wine.

And hey, it actually did the trick.

Who needs a rolling pin?

Finally, it was time to put my cake together. First, I faced the problem of slicing my extremely thin sponge into to layers. I took a deep breath and hoped for the best...

Not actually that terrible.

With some creative construction work, I was able to get two fairly even layers.

No one will ever know.

And now, it was time to stack. In an ideal world, I would have had a strip of acetate plastic to line my springform pan with and had a beautiful, clean surface to work on. But I didn’t even have a rolling pin handy; obviously I don’t have acetate lining around. So plastic wrap would have to do.

If it works, it works.

Then it was time to turn my attention to my strawberries. I picked out the prettiest, most evenly sized ones I could find, and halved them.

At least these turned out pretty. 

And then, it was construction time. First, I put in a layer of cake, brushed it with lemon syrup (my pastry brush was also at Wilson’s, so really I spooned on the syrup), and then added a “little crown of strawberries”, as per the recipe.

Regal.

Next, it was time to see if my creme patissiere had magically transformed into the right texture in the fridge.

Nope, still lumpy. But at least it was pretty solid...?

I added some more chopped strawberries on top.

At least the strawberries will taste good.

Then it was time for the rest of my “creme patissiere”, if you can even call it that at this point.

So lumpy. 

And then finally, I put on the other half of the cake, spooned over some more syrup, and topped it off with my marzipan. The recipe specified that I should melt some chocolate and make “pretty” decorations, and honestly I kind of wanted to call it a day given all my struggles and just forgo the chocolate. But in the spirit of the competition, I gave it a go anyway:

There is no design to this chocolate, this is the epitome of winging it.

I left the whole godforsaken mess to cool in the fridge overnight. In the meantime, it was time to check in with the bakers to see if they’d fare any better than I did with this Fraisier cake.

***

Mel starts off by referring to a Fraisier cake as a well-known celebration cake, which is certainly news to me.

Must be more popular in the UK, I guess.

The bakers start off by making a genoise sponge, and surprisingly, James chooses to whisk his by hand as well.

Dedication.

However, after seeing Dani’s batter, I can see that I have clearly not even come close to whipping mine for long enough.

This explains the lack of volume in my cake, I guess.

Dani struggles with the creme patissiere, though - she says that hers has “cellulite”.

It’s lumpy like mine, but I never thought to sieve it. 

As always, James seems to know exactly what to do.

Such smooth creme. 

All the bakers, however, struggle with setting up the acetate.

This makes me feel better about my plastic wrapped cake.

When it comes time to assemble, I can see that my creme is indeed thicker than the bakers’, even Dani’s.

Much more pipeable.

However, this may not be such a bad thing after all - Dani’s cake starts falling apart as soon as she takes it out of the pan, as the creme isn’t set.

Melty cake is never a positive.

In the end, James takes home the gold in yet another technical, with a perfectly risen sponge and a nicely set creme patissiere. 

That does look pretty celebratory.

***

It was time for the grand unveiling of my own cake. Would my thin cakes and lumpy creme prove to be my downfall?

First, here’s Mary’s perfect Fraisier:

And here’s mine, complete with chocolate decor:

You can definitely see that the creme isn’t the perfect smooth texture, and my bottom cake especially is a little narrow. But maybe it’s not quite so far off? As always, my judges would be the final arbiters. 

***

Matt’s Review: I get the sense that, as time goes on, the bakes are getting harder and harder to transport. So upon Jenna’s arrival I was already impressed that the cake was holding together as well as it did. And that turned out to be important, because the pairing of the layers was the key to this one. I’m always impressed when a food can take a flavor I normally don’t like and recontextualize it in such a way that I become a fan. In this case, that flavor is almond. I really struggle with that flavor normally, and this bake doesn’t disguise it at all. Instead, it pairs it perfectly with the other layers. I think Jenna did an excellent job with all the ratios — this could easily have become a “dislike” for me, but instead it was a joy to eat. All in all, two thumbs up. The cake, and Jenna, made my quarantine a little sweeter. 

Wilson’s Review: Well, the consistency is a little off on the creme patissiere. That can be a bit tricky, but the cake is a bit flat, looks like something went wrong with the mixing. Really should be past those kind of errors by now. I like strawberries, and the chocolate added an element of richness that contrasted brilliantly. As for the sponge, while not the prettiest I’ve ever seen, it does taste good - nice and airy. Overall a nice treat for a mid summer snack, once one gets past the first impression.

***

Final Thoughts: The creme patissiere was definitely a bit eggy, which was less than ideal. But all in all, this cake tasted pretty good and looked pretty fancy. The cake layers still felt airy and yummy even though they were thin, and the fresh fruit made for a nice treat. I will absolutely need to practice my creme patissiere though, and remember to NEVER take my eye off the stove. Rookie mistake. 

[chaniters]

Monsters

Reaper’s doomsday threatens to destroy the entire city of Phoenix. Rangers rush to stop him for a final, bloody confrontation. Catastrofiend seeks a second round with Awan.

Next part of @kruk-art ‘s Awan Cormac’s fanfic!

Enjoy! 

_____________________________

“Good evening,” Reaper says holding a mic. “Good evening everyone, how are you liking the party now? Pretty good, am I right? It’s good to be able to address the creme and crop of the West Coast’s corporate world” he says. 

You struggle with the impulse to shoot Reaper right now, and instead, keep moving to the side. You know better... 

It is hard to make way, engulfed by a sea of terrified civilians trying to figure out what’s going on as this skeletal man that has just killed one of their own starts the opening of a typical villain monologue. 

You’re not sure if it’s just the wardrobe or the much deeper tone he’s using, but he sounds like the physical manifestation of death right now, and it’s very demoralizing.  

According to your instructors, your main objective now would be to get into the best spot to get a clear shot at the enemy the moment your team leader orders it. Team leader... That would be Ortega right now in your mind, even if you’re not a ranger proper. 

At the corner of your eyes, you catch a glimpse of a couple of guards rushing towards the stage as you anticipated. You stop to study what kind of countermeasure Reaper’s planned to stop them. It’s pretty obvious the villain would have something prepared for this eventuality in a plan this complex. Still, you never know, right? Maybe it all backfires and he gets arrested on the spot?. That would be fun! 

You watch with anticipation as they start approaching Reaper who doesn’t even turn to them… And there it goes. They stumble on their feet and fall flat, their powered carapace armors malfunctioning as one, the joints releasing smoke and the stench of burnt circuits. A quick glance reveals the same is true for every other guard in the room. Also, more importantly, all the dampeners go down simultaneously.

“I’m afraid we will have none of that, my fellows” Reaper goes on “My AI system Charon has taken full control of the network that connects every system in this facility, including your mercenaries armors. I just have to thank your wonderful management for outsourcing most computer systems to my company” he adds dusting off his skeletal hands “It made my infiltration today a lot easier, yes, thank you for that.” 

If his AI took over all the systems that means he could overhear your intercoms. You send a mental suggestion to the woman next to Ortega, making her tap his shoulder before unconsciously pointing at you and each of the other rangers in the room, letting him know where everyone is. Having a telepath on the team is good for stuff like that.

Ortega quickly catches on because it’s not the first time you pull something this weird on him, and he gestures for you all to fan out and surround the enemy, a command you quickly pass onto all of your team with wordless thoughts. 

Sunstream and Steel move on to opposite ends of the room, while you waddle through the crowd to do the same with a hand to your gun’s grip, so that makes you three the shooters. Anathema, Elyise, Sentinel, and Ashfall remain now hidden in the crowd to intercept him. All four have powers that could prevent Reaper’s death touch, so it’s a pretty solid plan, at least in your mind. 

“Have you gone mad? What do you want from us?!” A woman asks. You recognize her as one of the company’s most priced Geneticists, Dr. Laverne. You read about her in a magazine, she developed the energy source in the Arcology.

“What do I want, you ask, Dr. Laverne? Well, to begin with, I’d like you all to have a taste of your own poison. Charon, proceed” he commands as he adjusts something to his face. A gas mask? Yes. Oh shit...

Ventilation shafts open up into the ceiling, making everyone look up which soon proves to be a mistake. Columns of dark brown gas descend rapidly upon the crowd, engulfed everyone into the acrid stench of the cloud outside. He must have disconnected the air purifiers, and started pumping the poisonous air directly inside. 

The people around you immediately cover their mouths and eyes, entering coughing fits, and you have to hold onto a wall while you adjust your gas mask not to fall into it as well. 

“W... What are you…?” Laverne coughs heavily, as reaper comes down the stage, walking up to her. “Why are you doing this? This is … my life’s… work. We are protecting the people in here” she says trying to stand to him.

“You, who have built this monstrosity... You, who are literally throwing a party while everyone outside is poisoned... You call this protection?”

“Not true… this… project is open… open to everyone!” she protests

“Everyone who can pay, you mean. Your greed has blinded all of you. You praise yourselves in having brought a handfull of powered heroes to the world, while your product kills thousands who try to live the dream... But it ends now. I’m not only funneling the cloud into the living spaces of this Arcology. It’s going straight into the power plant’s core, Dr. Laverne.”

The fear that creeps into her brain upon his words is hard to miss, even at this distance, in a room full of terrified people.

“J-just stop… we can… we can do whatever you want. We can offer you anything just...” she tries to negotiate under the gas

“Please doctor, I wouldn’t have gotten this far if all I wanted was extortion. The biomorphic fungi abomination you engineered is a truly remarkable lifeform.  It resists extreme temperatures, toxins of all kinds, and more importantly, grows incessantly while generating and metabolizing hero drugs turning the reaction into power. Quite brilliant I must say. Well, as it turns out, the toxic waste poisoning the city’s sky just happens to be the fungi’s ideal feeding ground. Now that it’s entering the core, the creature must be growing at a rapid pace, don’t you think?  It will soon overgrow its containment unit… Charon believes once it’s free it will grow through the whole Arcology exterior, maybe the whole city. Perhaps it can turn the entire cloud into hero drugs, given enough time.”

“You are mad! You will destroy the entire city! You will kill hundreds of thousands!”

“I’ve thought of it too, Doctor… but the thing is… isn’t it worth it to sacrifice one city if it means the whole country will realize the danger that your corporations represent? What lack of all regulation truly means? There won’t be any way for them to still support the economic free-zone and lack of all regulations after this.”

“Please.. You can’t do this!”

“Oh but I can. I am the Reaper, and you Dr. Laverne, you will die. You will ALL die. Want to escape?” he asks turning to a few executives rushing to the door “Be my guest of course, but remember, there’s a riot outside. I finally found a use for Psychopathor, and let me tell you, he’s already surrounded the whole building and the people are MAD. If you somehow manage to make it out, you will be torn to pieces on the streets.” 

By now, there is general chaos, as everyone rushes to the exits. Reaper raises his scythe to strike at Laverne… 

“I am the Reaper, and I have come for your sou…-”

“NOW!” Ortega says giving the signal. 

 You draw your gun and take two shots. You can see Sunstream sending a golden beam, while Steel’s activates his plasma rifle at the same time. 

Sunstream’s beam hits instantly, producing a flash of heat, followed by the explosive plasma blast from Steel’s cannon and your blasts at roughly the same time.  Anathema’s times his jump along with you and is now holding Dr. Laverne, safely out of Reaper’s reach. 

For one, hopeful, brief instant, you’re sure you’ve got him… But your mind quickly realizes the truth. 

“Watch out, he’s still in there!” you say trough your intercom

“How?! We just blasted him!” Sunstream asks.

As the cloud starts to dissipate, Reaper laughter cackles through the room.

“Now this is a surprise... Rangers! I expected you to be outside fighting Psychopathor… Well, I must admit this is awkward… I’m not used to being on the baddies side. Was it too much monologuing?”

“Simply the worst” Charge says standing up to whatever’s left to him. “Now please surrender”

“I think I’ll pass... It’s a bit too soon for that, don’t you think?” 

You begin to make out his figure, walking out of the mist. He looks unscathed, but translucent, glowing with white light. Shit, you’ve seen this before at the farm! So that’s why he had invisible skin…

“Everyone, be careful! He’s boosted twice! Those must be some sort of intangibility power!” 

“Shit, so he kills on touch and we can’t even touch him?” Anathema asks. 

“Yeap. Couldn’t possibly be worse” you say, immediately regretting the choice of words. 

“Alright Rangers, let’s do this. Let’s have this little fight. But what is a Halloween party without a proper monster? Charon, please do close the doors so we can keep our partygoers here for the main attraction. Oh, and while at it...  take over the speakers, and play... hmm… the Monster Mash?. I always enjoyed a classic when working on Halloween.”

“Main attraction? What do you mea…?” Ortega asks. 

Too late. The sudden strain of nausea, pain, and rage makes your vision blur, forcing you to stop in your tracks.  You lift your gaze, and manage to get a glimpse of it, falling onto you from one of the shafts. You get just enough warning to dive to the side, as it’s blades slice the man to your left instead of you. 

Catastrofiend lands where you had just been standing roaring, it’s eyes glaring straight into your yours. It raises its blades, ready to strike. 

It hasn’t forgotten it was you who shot it last time, and whatever it is you did, the fiend didn’t like it. It wants to pay you back. A quick scan reveals none of your allies is close enough to help you right now. 

Everyone who survived that night had their own version of the events, but the one thing all witnesses agreed on is that Reaper sang along with that stupid song the whole time. You still have nightmares about it.

Catastrofiend, smiles, before leaping straight at you. 

Shit.

___________________________________________________

My Fanfics: https://chaniters.tumblr.com/post/181692759294/my-fanfiction-for-fallen-hero

DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fan fiction using characters and the setting of the Fallen Hero: Rebirth and upcoming Fallen Hero: Retribution games written by Malin Riden. I do not claim ownership of any characters from the Fallen Hero wold. These stories are a work of my imagination, and I do not ascribe them to the official story canon. These works are intended for entertainment outside the official storyline owned by the author. I am not profiting financially from the creation of these stories, and thank the author for her wonderful game/s, without which these works would not exist.

[beauticate]

Lana Wilkinson, Stylist

Talking with Lana Wilkinson in her light-filled and colourful Melbourne home, you would never know that this completely charming and down to earth girl's girl is one of the country's best known celebrity stylists. Well, that is if you paid zero attention to her up-to-the-minute choice of footwear and the sharp architectural shoulder of her outfit. A die hard lover of fashion, Lana knows it goes hand in hand with all things beauty and took us through her best tips gleaned from years on set (including the makeup tool she guarantees gives flawless looking skin). Prepare to be jealous of her two little girls, who are not only growing up with a mother who is a seriously smart business person, but one who will be passing on a fashion treasure trove.

"When it comes to beauty, I always strive for flawless skin and create the rest of my look from there, so that all together it feels natural and simple.

A Beautyblender is the perfect tool to create flawless makeup. Keeping my skin hydrated is also key, so I use Ole Henriksen's products, specifically the Truth Serum, Banana Bright Eye Creme and a rich moisturiser, C-Rush Brightening Gel Creme, morning and night. Another must-have are my ongoing facials at Melanie Grant, that always leave my skin feeling clean, refreshed and glowing. 

I constantly say to my clients that you can have an amazing outfit, but if the hair and makeup aren’t right, you haven’t got a complete look.

People can always tell when you try too hard, so I think women look the most beautiful when they let their natural beauty shine through. That being said, my number one beauty essential is a Spray Aus spray tan. 

I have my morning routine pretty much down pat. 

I cleanse with Go-To Properly Clean, then I’ll use a toner and Go-To moisturiser before makeup. By Terry Lumi Serum is such a great base to apply before foundation - it gives the skin just the right amount of glow and acts as a natural colour correcting serum.

For my base, I try to use a product with SPF in it to avoid damage from the sun. I tend to switch between IT Cosmetics Your Skin But Better CC Cream SPF50+ and Natasha Denona Face Glow Foundation, which has an SPF 15. Next, I use my NARS Sheer Glow Foundation and liquid blush to give me a glowy complexion. The Kevyn Aucoin The Volume Mascara is a must-have as I love a big lash.

It’s fun to get a little more dramatic with my makeup for a night out.

I use the same NARS foundation and build it up to get good coverage. I like this one as it gives me a soft matte finish, which pairs well with a smokey eye and smudged eyeliner. Tarte's eyeshadow palettes are great and Sephora’s gel eyeliners are so easy to use. Ardell's individual lashes are always a favourite of mine and then I go in with Becca’s Shimmering Skin Perfector Luminous Blush, which is the bomb for your cheeks. I ensure my eyebrows are thick and filled in as they emphasise my eyes, and Amy Jean’s new eyebrow pencil is fab for this.

I have a couple of favourite makeup tricks that are easy to do but really work.

If you have straight eyelashes like I do, my first tip is to apply mascara before curling with an eyelash curler. I find applying product before curling maintains the curl all day. I also like to elongate my eyes, so I tend to apply bronzer or a bronze shadow to the outer corners of my eyes and blend it outwards. 

Because I colour my hair so frequently, I know I need to take care of it. 

To offset the damage of using hot tools, I like to use ELEVEN Miracle Hair Treatment and their Hydrate My Hair shampoo and conditioner. On days at home, I like to air dry my hair and keep the heat off it.

I would describe my personal style as classic monochrome with injections of colour.

I like to mix it up and play with trends, but my style is fundamentally classic. I make sure I invest in timeless essentials that can be worn after trends fade. My favourite Australian designers are Toni Maticevski, Dion Lee, Acler and Ellery, plus international brands such as Christian Dior and Chanel. These designers have a timeless element, but also evolve and keep their pieces fresh and stylish. I’m all about strong details and hero pieces. I just bought the Balenciaga Knife Pumps, which add a fun edge to any outfit.

I started my career pre-social media, so I never really knew it was something I could pursue. 

I’ve always had a love of fashion and took pride in curating my own outfits, but it was only through my job in fashion marketing at Westfield that I saw potential for a styling career. I worked for many years as a Project Marketing Manager and then would work tirelessly after hours and on weekends styling, to build my portfolio. I knew I was passionate about styling and that really grew over time.

Seeing the value that my job brings to small businesses and those just starting out gives me the passion to work as hard as I do.

Driving sales for brands and helping them to achieve their goals is so fulfilling. Another great part of my job is helping women to look and feel their best. I love when I know that a client feels amazing – it’s such a great process to be a part of.

I think I’m better than I used to be at saying no when I’m exhausted. Previously I’d have a hard time with this, but as the years go on saying no is my own form of self care.

I’ve just started reformer Pilates at Elite Training Sports and Medicine. As a working mum, having a strong core is imperative and I try and do this twice a week at about 5.30am with Stephanie Dion so I don’t impact my family. This way I’ve also done something for myself before I even start my day. For so long I’ve struggled with weakness in the abs after two pregnancies, but I’m finally starting to feel stronger and have much less backpain.

I think it’s important to not be too hard on yourself about what you eat.

I do try to be as healthy as possible, but I have a huge sweet tooth and when I really want chocolate, I think it's best just to have it and really enjoy it. I love to use the Vital Greens Daily Supplement. It gives me a boost of essential vitamins and I’ve noticed that since taking it, I rarely get sick. They also have a protein powder which I use in my morning smoothie if I need to have breakfast on the go. It’s harder for me to stick to a daily routine because everyday is so different for me, but morning coffee seems to be my one lasting ritual. I also take a daily marine collagen supplement called Proplenish that is an essential part of my beauty routine. It helps with anti-ageing from the inside out, and I always notice the difference when I’m using it. Plus, it’s a great sneaky way to increase my water consumption.

I really wish I had more time to relax, but to be honest my schedule is a bit crazy at the moment. 

I have two young girls, so when I’m not working I love to spend time with them. That is when I’m at my most relaxed - other than during my alone time with my morning cup of coffee, which tends to be my own kind of meditation before the day begins. I always like to sit and get some work done by myself nice and early, because once the kids wake up the madness begins!"

Story by Zoe Briggs. Photography by Neiyo.

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