#-and come from them. rather than their hopes and dreams coming from some tree they don't even know the existence of.

[soaked-ghost]

something about apples and mothers

[whispersoftheton]

Anthony bridgerton x wife!reader. Maybe his wife has quite a childlike innocence that the women of the ton take to be weirdness and they tend to isolate her but she never knows why. Maybe they’re newly married and she decides to invite some of the ladies for tea but no one shows up and she’s upset because she’s confused and Anthony comforts her and joins her for tea instead to cheer her up.

Hey! Thank you so much for requesting this & for being so patient! This wasn't meant to be this long but it sort of took on a life of its own. I hope you enjoy it <3

Anthony Bridgerton x Fem!Reader

Warnings: none just comfort :)

Word Count: 1.1K

Every square inch of Aubrey Hall's walls flourished with the season's most stunning flowers, the gardens lush as far as the eye could see. The breeze did little to cool you off from the summer heat as you sat under the tent, sipping your afternoon tea overlooking the meadow alongside Violet Bridgerton. It had been a tedious day of tending to various duties around the household, and you were expecting company from some ladies of society later that evening. It seemed your schedule had been considerably more than full since your wedding a few months ago. Rather frankly, you were just as exhausted as you were delighted in your new marriage to the Viscount. Keeping up with the Bridgertons all while being the latest lady of the house proved to be quite the task. Sure, your introverted preferences to stay within the walls of your home with a good book or spend quiet time in the gardens studying the plants were different than the interests of the ladies of the ton. However, you always tried your very best to keep everyone surrounding you in good spirits while performing your obligations, always looking toward Violet for approval, wanting to stay within your welcome. She was the Viscountess before you, after all. You could only dream of living up to her in your new position. Overseeing every small detail runs smoothly across your home, not to mention the impending weight on your shoulders due to the responsibility of Anthony's sisters coming out in the following seasons. You didn't know how long you could keep this facade up if you were being honest with yourself. But you had standards to upkeep, ways in which the Viscountess held her own beside her husband, and the last thing you ever wanted to do was let Anthony or his family down.

The sun blared upon the exquisitely green grass; surrounding the field on the outer edges were countless trees with blossoming flowers overflowing the gardens. Springtime at Aubrey Hall, indeed, was like no other. You turned your attention toward the Pall Mall game. Your husband stood before his siblings, mumbling something you were sure was some tease towards Eloise, making you smirk. Anthony turned toward the field and adjusted his grip on the mallet before making his final shot. A generous mix of disappointed grumbles and cheers erupted from the handful of Bridgertons as he made the final winning score. Half of them scrambled to debate the shot while the other half stood by, giggling toward them.

Anthony left his siblings to argue among themselves over the game he now reigned as champion over. Eloise was clearly bitter and left feeling she had been made a mockery over this loss after spending her spare time practicing for this very moment. Anthony placed his mallet on the stand alongside the others and approached you. He graciously extended his hand toward you, motioning you to go with him before the both of you bid goodbye to his mama and slipped out of sight and into the grand home.

"Eloise is taking quite hard, isn't she?" You said as he guided you through the doors. "She must have thought her practice would allow her to best you once and for all."

"Having hopes of besting her older yet clearly more skilled brother? Unlikely, my love." Anthony taunted, evidently still on a high from his victory. You stood in the main room while Anthony poured himself a drink, beckoning you to join him before you politely declined.

"I cannot. I am having the ladies over for tea shortly, and I cannot be anything less than perfection for their arrival." Anthony wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you in for a brief kiss. Enough to have you wrapping your arms around his neck and yearning for more as he pulled away just enough for your noses to brush tenderly against one another.

"No moment in time exists in which you are not perfection, my love." Anthony's smile warmed your heart as you relaxed against him. "They will love you as much as I do; I am sure of it." His validation and loving gaze melted any lingering stresses still dancing around in your head. All that was left was to check off some last-minute preparations, and the tea could commence.

The late afternoon sun cast dispersed shadows across the cobblestone path. Anthony strolled into his home since returning from a lengthy afternoon of business meetings and running several errands around town. Anthony had hoped to come home to you excitedly telling him of your afternoon tea with the ladies of the ton. Instead, he found the halls seemed eerily calm for this time of day. He entered the main room and caught you sitting quietly on one of the sofas in a far corner. You curled up beside the unlit fireplace, twirling your fingers anxiously in your lap when you felt Anthony take a seat beside you.

"Sweetheart." Anthony paused before placing his hand in your lap. You didn't know if it was for comfort or to stop you from fidgeting. His warmth was welcome either way. "Is something wrong?" He cautiously asked.

"No one came." The words strained from your throat. "I know your mama and sisters left this morning on a day's travel, but I hoped-." Your voice broke before resuming. "I hoped at least someone would have-." Tears brimmed your eyes, and scattered tears stained across the top of your dress, some still falling down your cheeks. Anthony's hand cupped your face, his thumb gently preventing the tears from their continued flow. He took your hands in his and placed a lingering kiss on your knuckles before standing before you and offering you his hand. Without another word, Anthony dragged you along the halls and out into the gardens. Various flowers bloomed around you, and he brought you to one of the rarer flowers now flourishing on the property.

"What are we doing here?" You questioned while admiring the intricate patterns in which the vine had taken, the beautiful springtime flora temporarily making you forget the catastrophe of this afternoon. Anthony stepped closer from behind, arms wrapping around you as he whispered in your ear.

"It is when I am gazing upon the most exquisitely beautiful flower in the garden that I think of you." Tears again swelled inside you, but for a different reason this time. "The day will come when the world will see the beauty I am fortunate enough to hold near every day. In the meantime, I get you all to myself, hm?" The warmth and comfort of his words and presence enveloped you, brushing away the day's worries and woes with an ease only he possessed. His voice was a soothing balm for your soul that always had a way of convincing you everything would be okay. Because when you were around Anthony, you knew it would be.

Mini Tag List: @bugnug @queenofmean14 @fiction-is-life @thethreeeyed-raven @ssprayberrythings @fatbottomedvirgo @fictional-hooman (let me know if you would like to added by leaving a comment here or dm me if you’d like to be added.removed)

I DO NOT HAVE WATTPAD. I do not consent to having my work reposted, translated, or published to any third party site or app. if anyone sees my work anywhere that is not ao3/tumblr or under any other username that is not whispersoftheton, it has been reposted without my permission

[her-devils-advocate]

Home, love, family

pairings: Levi Ackerman x reader

genre: fluff

summary: It has been some time since the fighting had ended, the world has started to move on and you find yourself doing the same.

You and Levi decide it is time to start taking the next step towards enjoying the future you fought for.

word count: 1,787

ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/56315470

After years spent fighting towards a dream, an ideal world without titans and worry, you now find yourself standing within that once unrealistic future. It didn't come without sacrifice, each tally on your heart continues to weigh it down to this day, but you refuse to stop carrying the souls of your friends. Some part of you likes to believe that while you live on while carrying their memory, they get to experience this new life by your side, wherever they may be.

The world isn't as you had hoped, the price paid seems too high for some, yet you are content to try and put it behind you as much as possible. You fought for too long and lost too much to not make the most of the new world. A sentiment you're glad to share with Levi.

You now stand in awe as you survey the large clearing in the forest, the trees forming a new, more natural wall around you. The ancient bark twists towards the sky and erupts into a sea of green above, you were surprised to see such a gorgeous sight had evaded the rumbling at first, already used to the muddy barren land you and many others had found themselves in.

Your eyes widen when they finally fall on the small, cosy cottage sat proudly within. Flowers surround the building, attracting the attention of the perfectly round bumblebees nearby, happily flittering between each bud without a care in the world. You watch them hover with a small smile, maybe you can finally experience a similar life, having been freed of the bonds of duty. Now free to spend your days working to provide a life for you and Levi, rather than the future of mankind.

You're so distracted by your thoughts that you fail to notice Levi slowly approaching you, taking the time to remove the few bags you had brought from the car.

"And just when I thought we had escaped living behind walls." He mutters as you move to take the bags off him, shooting him a glare as he puts up a small fight despite his cane.

"Oh hush, this is different. We have all the privacy in the world here, a quiet place just for you, me and whoever we allow to visit." You cannot help but grimace, that list of people has grown shockingly short. You shake your head, refusing to let that train of thought continue its rampage through your mind, there are always new bonds to be forged alongside flowers to lay against cold stone memorials.

Noticing your falling mood, Levi steps forward to take the bags back one more, only to place them on the stepping stones leading towards your new home. He then lays his cane on top, before carefully making his way towards you.

Before you can ask him what he's doing, he scoops you up with ease. One hand is securely around your back while the other rests under your knees. The action brings a small squeak out from your lips, the surprise rendering you speechless as you wrap your arms around his neck, staring up at him with wide eyes. He rolls his eyes at your darkening cheeks before walking towards the door, giving it a swift kick all while happily ignoring the offended look you give him in return.

“Hey! We haven’t even officially moved in yet and you’re already being rough with the place.” Your expression downplays your words and you find it hard to keep up the stern tone for long.

“Tch, it’s fine. Do you see any damage? No. Anyways, I’d fix it if there was, it’s not like we don’t have the time for that now.”

You don’t bother to reply, letting the back-and-forth drop before it can grow. Instead, you take the time to study his face, carefully following the jagged scars running along one side of his face. You slowly unwrap one of your hands and bring it to gently stroke along the scar, smiling tenderly as he subtly leans into the action. His eyes are tired, something you are well acquainted with, but recently you have noticed a new light shining within the grey of his eyes, a peace that neither of you had experienced bringing new sensations to your life.

“Time… We have all the time we need now.” You echo his sentiment, watching his eyes soften as he looks down at you with a small smile. You will never get tired of seeing that expression on his face, soaking up the rare sight each time while doing your best to lure it out of him whenever you can. You are momentarily brought back to reality when you feel him shift you in his arms, his face betraying nothing despite the way he continues to favour one of his legs and has swapped to leaning against the wall.

“What are you doing?” You question as your hands come up to straighten out his cravat, the silky material having fallen loose during the long journey you had just taken.

“Carrying you.” His voice is monotone, yet you can feel the mix of exasperation and amusement within his words. You give him a look that shows just how unimpressed you are, you fight off a small grin when he rolls his eyes and continues, “If you didn’t want that answer, you should have been more specific.”

“Okay then, why are you carrying me when last time I checked, I’m not the one with the injured leg?”

At that, he scoffs yet makes no move to release you. Instead, his grip on you tightens and you watch as a small blush dusts his cheeks. He avoids your eyes, instead peering into the half-empty cottage awaiting your arrival. 

“Isn’t it a tradition to carry your partner across the threshold of your new home?” His voice is low and his head is held even lower as he does his best to casually hide his expression from your prying eyes. You can’t fight off your blush, now painting your cheeks with a rosy hue to pair with his.

You open your mouth, only to close it, the words escaping you as you try your best to respond, not wanting to leave him squirming. “That’s usually done after a wedding unless you have something to tell me. You didn’t marry me in the night, did you?”

You keep your words as playful as you can with your heart threatening to jump out of your chest and mix itself up in your sentences, the hope you had pushed down over the chaotic months now deciding to slowly crawl back into the front of your mind. The small huff of amusement he gives in reply doesn’t help to push the hope back into its confinements. 

“Can’t say I did, that’s something I would want you to remember and knowing you, you’d also make us have some shitty party, with a cake and those brats to celebrate it with.” Levi’s voice is gentle as he gets caught up in his imagination and you find yourself staring up at him, eyes wide with adoration.

“We would have the biggest party, I would invite everyone that we know. You’d be so fed up by the end of the night, utterly sick of the attention and ready to leave.” You rest your head against his chest with a small chuckle, feeling his quiet laughter gently rock your body. 

“I can see that a little bit too well. You would insist on dancing with everyone from our squad and I would end up glaring at one of them, probably Connie, for being clumsy and standing on your foot.” You can hear the affection he continues to hold for your old squad laced in his words and find yourself slowly nodding against his chest, your fingers playing with the fabric of his shirt.

“Connie would absolutely be the one to do that, he would panic and then step on my foot. Then he would see your face and panic even more, calling you “Captain Levi” on instinct despite us being retired now,” you slightly lower your voice and speed up your words to mimic the boy’s voice, earning a scoff from Levi. “Then Jean would tease the poor boy, making him get embarrassed while Armin or Mikasa would try to gently de-escalate the pair.”

“And then I would snatch you away in the middle of the commotion and we would sneak out to finally get to spend time together, you complaining the entire time about not saying goodbye.” He finishes your joint daydream with a fond smile and despite the future scenario, you can’t help but notice how similar it sounds to your time in the Scouts. Never having enough time to properly spend together and always having the squad to lead, yet you can’t say you regret it and looking back, you’ve always had a small, albeit very odd, family by your side. 

Before you can speak that thought aloud, his voice catches your attention once more and you can feel his body tense up. “Well, we might have done this thing backwards, having just bought a house together already. But I’m not wasting any more time, not again.”

“Levi?” You can’t help the shake in your voice, his words causing a multitude of emotions to swirl in your chest.

“The only logical next step to take is to marry you.”

A small gasp escapes from your lips as his gaze burns into you, neither of you willing to look away and break the moment. You feel your eyes begin to water as your heart overflows with joy, but you blink them away, instead letting out a small chuckle.

“You make it sound like it’s a battle tactic.”

“From the previous conversation, it might as well be.” Levi counters quickly and you can feel him slowly begin to relax as he walks through the door, carrying you into your new life together and gently placing you back onto your feet. Before you can take a moment to savour everything, to let the whirlwind of emotions calm down and be processed, you hear him click his tongue in annoyance. You turn to face him, watching as he drags a slender finger across the dark wood of the stairs handrail, his eyebrows drawn together in disgust.

“This place is covered in dust, before we do anything, it needs to be cleaned. Stay put, I’ll get the bag.”

You can’t help the load groan as you watch him drift back outside. You take the short break to mentally prepare yourself for a long day of scrubbing the floors side by side with the man you love.

[rosieofcorona]

All We Do Not Say

Hi beloveds! I have crafted a soft little Gale fic for you because it's my firm belief that everyone's favorite wizard deserves all the warmth in the world. 😌 Also on AO3, if you prefer. As always, thank you for reading. 💕

There was a time in his life that Gale could sleep anywhere, provided he had a good book and a space to sit down. 

In Waterdeep, he might wake in his armchair or on his balcony with the weight of an ancient tome still resting in his lap, or at his desk, his cheek pressed against parchment. The smell of it, of ink and lignin, would bring him back to his senses before his eyes were fully open, and he’d recall what he’d been studying, and begin reading again. 

At home, in his tower, he could do this night after night and still feel mostly rested come morning. 

But he is far from his tower, and farther each day.

Perhaps it is the orb that keeps him up as of late, with its insatiable, unnatural hunger, or perhaps it is the tadpole that wriggles and pulses impatiently inside his skull. Or it could, he supposes, be the simpler and less curable matter of aging– an affliction that seems, on occasion, more frightening than either of the others. 

Whatever the cause of his recent insomnia, it pulls Gale into a rather distressing cycle– he cannot sleep, so he cannot focus, so he cannot read, so he cannot sleep. 

Instead, he finds himself offering to keep watch over camp in the evenings, if only for the distraction. The far-off gibbering of a newborn gnoll, the crunch of foliage under goblin feet, an animal scream– each night a fresh and distant horror calls his mind away from greater threats, from illithids and tadpoles and gods.

It’s an odd remedy, he knows. But the alternative is lying awake in his tent, turning death over and over in his mind until the thought is worn smooth as a river stone. 

It works well for a time, keeps his mind on the present and off of some vague, future doom.

That is, at least, until they reach the Underdark. 

Deep beneath Faerûn, there is something profoundly disturbing about the lack of…well, everything. They find no grand cities or quaint little villages, few animals and even fewer people. 

No trees, no light. No sky. 

Most nights spent underground are so quiet that Gale may as well stay in his bedroll, staring up at a canopy of fabric, dark as the velvet earth above them. 

He thinks, It is like being buried alive, without even the stars to bear witness. 

On these nights he can feel the stones in his head turning over.

Even so, come the evening (or what he guesses is evening), Gale volunteers to stand sentinel for the fifth time in a tenday. 

He always asks them after dinner, when his companions are most likely to agree, after his cooking has warmed them and filled their bellies and made them want nothing more than to close their eyes and dream of somewhere, anywhere else. 

Tav is the only one who protests with any frequency, the only one who seems to notice that the circles under his eyes are half a shade darker than they were yesterday, when they were half a shade darker than the day before. 

Even on nights when she convinces someone else to take his place, he will relieve them after Tav has gone to sleep. 

It starts the same way every time. 

Gale walks the perimeter in an infinite loop, looking for life in the darkness, illuminated only by the fire in the center of their camp. It makes him feel like a distant planet, nearly untouched by the sun. How strange to think that he’d once felt like the sun itself. 

He continues in his orbit until the subterranean cold gnaws at his limbs. It bites down hard on his nose and ears and fingers, chases him back to the fire, back to the light. 

Hypnotized by the flames and their radiant warmth, he does not hear the quiet stirring in the tent beyond his own, doesn’t hear the soft approach of nimble feet. 

A voice comes to him out of the darkness.

“I hope you’re not keeping watch again.” 

“Mystra,” Gale gasps, startled, the goddess’s name invoked in equal parts a prayer, a curse.

“Forgive me,” Tav says, through a laugh she cannot help. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.” If it were anyone else he might be annoyed, or even a little embarrassed– but the sound of her laughter bubbles like seafoam over sand, rushes over and around him. Coupled with the relief that she is not some dreadful creature of the Underdark, he finds it difficult to feel anything besides affection. 

“It’s quite alright,” he recovers, with a shake of his head. “You surprised me, that’s all.”

“Then I really hope you’re not keeping watch.” 

She is teasing him now, just lightly, a familiar spark of warmth behind her eyes. 

It is the same look she gives him when she brings him a new book, or when he cooks for her, or when he tells her about Waterdeep. It is the same look she gave him earlier in the day, when she had offered to brew him a tea that might help him to sleep.

Gale has trouble remembering the last time another looked at him this way, so interested and inviting and earnest. 

Perhaps, he thinks, another never has. 

“Are you alright?” Tav asks, when he’s been quiet for too long.  

“Of course,” he says with the sincerity of a promise, offered with a smile that he hopes will be convincing. “Just lost in thought.” 

There is a part of him that doesn’t want to leave it there, that wants to share his every thought with her, his every terror, every dream. She must know that there is more to it, must’ve learned by now to recognize when Gale isn’t telling her everything, but he is grateful that she doesn’t press him, never presses him. 

Instead she breaks into a grin and says, “You’re lucky I’m not a bulette.” 

“I’m lucky they’re not so light-footed. What are you doing up, anyway?”

“The cold always wakes me, sooner or later,” Tav sighs. “If I’d known it was so godsdamned frigid down here, I might’ve nicked a fur or two from the Zhent.” 

It’s Gale’s turn to laugh, though she’s only half-joking. 

She’s drawn near to him, to the flames, her palms outstretched, her fingers spread wide as if to grab hold of as much warmth as possible. 

“But it’s alright,” she continues, “So as long as I’m close to the fire.” 

“Any closer and you’ll be in it, I’m afraid. Perhaps I can help.” 

Tav tilts her head and quirks an eyebrow in a curious little expression. “Can you?”

“If you’ll allow me.” 

Gale turns to face her fully, and she mirrors him out of instinct. 

“Hold out your hands to me,” he says. “Palms together, just barely. Like you’re praying.” 

“Like this?” “Like that.” 

The spell is one his mother taught him, among the first he’d ever learned. 

He still remembers that winter in Waterdeep, when the snow fell hard and fast. When the ice in the harbor kept the ships at arm’s length and the frozen streets shone like glass. He was young then, six or seven, but even now he can feel his small hands in Morena’s, warmed by a word and a touch. 

Warm and fed, she used to tell him. That’s how you show someone they’re loved. 

Gale cages Tav’s hands lightly in his own, the way he might hold a butterfly. He pushes all thoughts of winter away and calls to mind the rippling heat of summer, an orchard grown fat with peaches, the silvery shimmer of sweat on skin. 

The rose-petal flush of a cheek cradled in a hand, her cheek, his hand…

“Calor aestas,” he says quietly, when the image comes into clear view. He feels the cold melt from her fingers, hears the comfortable sigh that follows. “Better?”

“Yes,” she murmurs. “Much.” 

She is looking at him now with an intensity he has not seen since the night he first showed her the Weave, all that time ago. The night he saw her thoughts laid bare, had all but felt her lips on his. 

Had she seen them now, the visions he had conjured? Had she felt him pull her close in his own mind?

Tav clears her throat softly and he comes back to himself, his heartbeat thrashing wildly in his chest. He realizes with some urgency that he has not let her go and pulls back suddenly, but not without reluctance. 

“I hope,” he swallows, trying to compose himself. “I hope it helps you sleep.” 

“Do you want me to stay up with you?”

Yes, he thinks selfishly, Yes. Stay up with me, stay close to me, always. 

He shakes his head instead. “You should rest while the spell holds.”

“And how long is that?”

“As long as I’m able to concentrate.” 

He will think of her hands and their pull on a bowstring, their pluck of a lyre, their grip on a sword. How they weave her own magic, how they cradle a book. How they felt clasped in his, soft and cold. 

A focus worth holding, at last. 

“Only if it’s no trouble,” she says. 

“None at all.” 

Gale is grateful that he manages to stop himself, for once, from saying the rest of the thought as it enters his head. I would think of you anyway, magic or no.  

Tav takes his hand in hers again, this time to squeeze it fondly.

For a moment, he feels that if he were to die just now– from the orb, from the tadpole, in the jaws of a hungry bulette– it would all have been worth it, for this. 

“Thank you, Gale.”

Her smile is warmer than any summer he remembers, brighter than any star he can name.

[luna0713hunter]

Dancing to the beat of our hearts

Zoro Roronoa x reader

Summary : being Zoro's lover,was a dream come true. Everything was perfect about him,but...when the night comes and you see couples dancing,you cant help but to wish for more...

Warnings : none, slightly hurt/comfort,Zoro being a simp for you,soft Zoro, FLUFF,gender neutral reader

*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘

"ANOTHER VICTORY FOR STRAW HATS!!!CHEERS!!!"

Luffy's excited shout echoes through the night,as everyone cheer and down their drinks. All around you,people were celebrating,and happily serving you and your crewmates drinks after drinks.

You and your crewmates had managed to save yet another village from pirates,and it was time to celebrate.

Everything about this village was absolutely beautiful;from the cherry trees that had blossomed just recently,making the scenery breathtaking,to its kind and warm-hearted people who knew nothing but how to love and be happy.

They apparently,also loved to dance.

When the song changes to something soft and more melodic,you watch from your place across the bonfire how couples start to gather around;hands being placed on shoulders and arms around waists. You watch and sip your suddenly too bitter drink as they dance,and the sound of their laughter fills the air.

Your eyes wander to the green haired man sitting next to the open bar across you,and your lips pull down to a frown;Zoro didnt like to dance.

You loved Zoro,of course you did,but ever since you two became a couple...things didnt get too different between the two of you.

Obviously there were small kisses here and there,and Zoro became even more protective of you if that was even possible,but you craved real romance. Like the ones you would see young couples do,or read in the books; running under the rain while laughing,going shopping or matching clothes,and of course, dancing .

You could've made a list of the dances you wished to have with Zoro on so many occasions,but you never asked. You knew Zoro;he wasnt a big fan of showing his affection openly,always choosing to show his love to you through his actions. So it didnt take a genius to guess he would absolutely rather die than to dance.

You swallow the lump in your throat and stare down to your drink. You weren't even sure what it was; probably something light since you weren't feeling even slightly drunk. Something sweet. Maybe cherry? It sure had a good smell to it. As you swing the last of your drink around the glass,you make a mental reminder to tell Sanji to get some with you back to the ship. A small smile graces your lips as you think about sailing tomorrow morning once again with your new family,but the happiness is short lived as a bitter feeling fills your chest and you find yourself blinking rapidly in hopes of not bursting in tear right there.

Was it too much to ask to have a romantic love life?

As you start to wonder whether to return to the Going Merry or ask the musicians to play some other song,a small tap on your shoulder makes you jump in your sit slightly. You turn your head,and find yourself face to face with your boyfriend.

At first, Zoro's eyes search yours for a second,before jerking his head toward the back,where the road leads to the cherry garden.

"come with me for a second."

you silently nod,and accepting his offer to help you stand,you take his much larger hand in yours and make your way toward the garden. And when you finally step inside,you let out a loud gasp.

You dont think you've ever seen anything more beautiful in your life;the way the petals of the cherry blossoms dance in the air and settle on your hair,the air having the sweet smell of the drink that you had earlier,and the moon shining the brightest you've ever seen-

And none of them could compare to the picture Zoro was making.

You've always loved Zoro;ever since the very first moment you saw him,the first time he smiled at you,and the first time he held your hand. You loved Zoro,and you believed with your soul that there was no one prettier than him.

But now,as you watch the flower petals dancing around him,and the moonlight shining on his green air as he stares at you with the softest look on his face,you cant help your heart from beating awfully faster.

You loved Zoro. And gods above,he was the most beautiful being in the whole universe.

You're so busy admiring his features that when his fingers brush against your cheek,you jump slightly. Zoro raises his fingers up to you hair,and you feel him pluck something out.

When he lowers his hand,he shows you a small cherry blossom that was trapped in your hair. And in that moment,when he raises it up to his lips,you swear the time stops all together.

Zoro closes his eyes as his lips make contact with the flower,and he slowly opens his eyes to meet yours.

"y/n," he puts the flower in the pocket right over his heart and as he takes hold of your hand,with the sound of his three swords clanking together,he kneels right in front of you. Your gap at him,and you're torn between laughing and kneeling as well.

"Zoro,whats going on?"

Zoro scowls at you.

"what does it look like I'm doing?"

"proposing?!"

"no," Zoro deadpans,and your face visibly falls, "that has to be special. Not out of blue."

Your face brightens and small laugh escapes from your lips

"then,whats going on?"

And for the very first time since meeting him,he actually looks embarrassed.

You didn't know he could feel that kind of emotion

"I'm planning to ask you for a dance,if you let me finish."

When your mouth slams shut,he sighs and unconsciously rubs his thumb against the back of your hand.

Your heart flutter at how comforting he can be even when he's not realizing it.

"Babe,i know I'm not the most romantic person in the whole world," when you let out a snort,he scowls again, "but i promise,its not because i dont love you."

He slowly raises to his feet once again,and gently leans his forehead against yours.

"i know i dont say it enough,but i love you." His hand find your waist,as your arms wrap his neck;your eyes shining with unshed tears, "and i will continue loving you until my last breath."

You let out a small sniffle when he kisses your wet eyelashes.

"sounds pretty much like a proposal to me."

"oh,babe,i promise you that after my proposal, you'll cry your eyes out."

You tug at his short hair and give him an unimpressed look.

"you're making my heart beat with your smooth talk,Zoro. Keep it up and you'll no longer have a lover to propose to."

And when he laughs quietly,you cant help but to pull him down for a kiss.

The sound of the music in the background,makes everything feel surreal. The way Zoro holds you so gently,and his lips moving against yours with urgency,reminds you how passionate he can be. And its right there,that Zoro reminds your how much he actually loves you.

The sound of the music is still audible in the background,so when he starts swinging you side by side,you cant help the giddy laugh that escapes you. Zoro gives you a gentle smile,and kisses your forehead.

"from now on,tell me what you desire. I'll make all your dreams come true."

And when you raise your head to lock your lips with his once again,a small whisper leaves your lips.

"dont worry. All my dreams had already came true the moment i laid my eyes one you."

*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘

P.s : thank you everyone for 400 followers!!!

[slut4monsterz]

Yan!black panther oc :3

It was starting to get dark fast. You hadn't realized just how large the forest was. You come here all the time! Just never this far..maybe this wasn't the best idea. It was only meant to be a quick trip to go and gather some berries. Your cottage was only a brisk walk away from the tree line, you should have turned back hours ago. But there was so many flowers, and pretty birds, and a bunch of cute deer, and oh, the sunset was just too gorgeous to miss, and... well its not import now. Not when you start to get goosebumps down your arms and the heavy feeling that someone or rather something is watching you. The sky once an array of yellows and pinks now begins to dull, the deer and the birds are long gone by now. The feeling of being watched doesn't leave with them.

Your legs burn and ache you need to find somewhere to sit. maybe somewhere to die. anything is better than this. the sky is pitch black now; not even the stars are visible through the thick tops of the trees. Ahead of you there's a stream and a huge tree barley visible. you definitely aren't' going the right way or getting back home any time soon but this will have to do for now. the ground underneath you is cold as you lean against the tree and close your eyes. Hoping that this was all some bad dream and you'll wake up back at home with fresh berries to eat.

But unfortunately for you that was not the case. There was a very quiet and faint thud behind you followed by what sounded like footsteps, just barley noticeable but you heard it. And it terrified you. You squeezed your eyes closed tighter, maybe this really is where it ends. You waited and waited for death to come, or to be eaten or killed or- but nothing came.

You cracked your eyes open the tiniest bit. Whatever was about to kill sure was taking its time. You look up and are met with unblinking glowing yellow eyes. startled, you yelp and scooch back away from the tree. The eyes don't move. "uhm...hello?" your voice is meek and quiet, just below a whisper. The eyes shift seemingly looking directly into your soul. "aren't you going to eat me already? its er.. not very nice to scare me like this..." A dark chuckle echoed around you, making the hair on the back of your neck stand up.

"Eat you? now why would I do that?" the eyes moved towards you getting so close to you that you can feel its breath on your face. "uh, because...uhm, your hungry?" "Not hungry enough to eat you, dear. Humans aren't really my taste, you do look quite appetizing though, I must admit."

As your eyes adjusted to the dark his features became more visible. His inky black hair and dark skin come into view, the most noticeable however were the ears perched atop of his head and the swaying tail behind him.

"I've been watching you for a while...you just looked so innocent, all scared and lost in my territory." He pauses and you feel a cold hand rest on your cheek. "what are you doing so far into the forest anyway? silly human, don't you know that it's dangerous?" You stare at him wide eyed unsure of what exactly to respond with. So something was watching you... He pulls his hand away sitting up. "o-okay then, what do you want from me?"

He cocks his head to the side staring at you "Silly girl, I don't want anything from you. I want you." His tail comes back into view and wraps itself around your upper thigh, keeping you from moving too far. "I don't understand..." "That's okay. You will eventually." He rises to his full height looming above you as you look up in confusion and fear. His bright eyes were the last thing you saw before he swooped you up in his arms, holding onto you tight and taking you further into the woods.

first post yippie!!!

[runnning-outof-time]

I’ll Be Home For Christmas | Tommy Shelby x Reader

Request: no - written for @pacifymebby ‘s 2k Follower/Christmas Celebration

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Summary: Tommy promises (Y/N) that he’ll be home for his family’s first Christmas in Arrow House. (Y/N)’s hoping it won’t only happen in her dreams.

Warnings: none - just some Christmas fluff

Word Count: 2223

A/N: Congrats on 2K, Layla! I went with the song ‘I’ll Be Home For Christmas’ … I listened to Brett Eldredge’s version of it and came up with this idea. I hope you like it. And it’s fitting that this is being posted on Christmas Eve, right? Sorry for cutting it close. Happy Holidays to all! Enjoy! :)

I’D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! - YOUR COMMENTS & REBLOGS HELP ME WRITE!

Comment/Message me if you’d like to be tagged in future stories similar to this one

(Y/N) sat back on the chaise lounge with a sigh. She bit on her bottom lip as she held the reciever up to her ear.

“Are you still there?” came from the other line.

“I am,” was what she was able to get out before she choked on her words, fingertips pressed against her lips as she tried her damnedest to hold back tears.

“Tell me what’s wrong, love.” Even miles away and through a phone call, Tommy was still able to read his wife like an open book.

There was a moment of silence before she responded. In that time, (Y/N) was trying to decide whether she wanted to make her plights known or not. On one hand, he was her husband; the person who she was supposed to disclose these sorts of problems to. On the other, she didn’t want to add another problem onto his probably already full plate.

“(Y/N)?” Tommy’s voice cut through her internal debate, bringing her back to the conversation.

“When will you be home, Tommy?” she decided to come right out and ask.

“I’ll be home for Christmas,” he assured her within seconds of her making her worry known.

“But…but Christmas is tomorrow,” she stammered out, wracking her mind to try and figure out if his homecoming was even possible, “where even are you right now?”

“I’m in London, and I know it’s tomorrow. I’ll be home,” he assured her once more.

“It’s our first Christmas in this new house,” she said as she looked around the reading room that she’d decorated to her particular taste. The manor was beautiful, but it felt so empty when Tommy was away. “The kids had the best time decorating the tree,” she added, a smile gracing her face as she thought back to the time she spent with her three children earlier in the week. A time that Tommy had missed out on.

“That’s good to hear,” Tommy smiled as he closed his eyes and pictured his three young children gathered around the large tree in the living room. He never had a chance to make a memory like it when he was younger. The fact that he wasn’t present for his children at this time felt like a stab to the heart.

(Y/N)’s smile faltered as the thing that had been eating her alive from the moment her husband’s car pulled out of the driveway returned to the forefront of her mind. “I can’t have you gone much longer, Tommy,” she finally spoke, deciding to come out with her thoughts rather than keep them in.

“I won’t be, darling,” he assured her.

“When will these business trips end?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” he sighed as he ran a hand over his face.

“Yes you do. You’re the head of the company,” she insisted, a tinge of desperation seeping into her words.

“They’re part of the job.”

“They’re taking away time from our family.”

Silence rang on the line after (Y/N)’s declaration. She was no longer able to hold back the tears, letting them silently slip down her cheeks as she tried to keep the front that everything was fine on her end of the conversation.

“I’ll be home for Christmas, (Y/N),” Tommy was the one to break the silence after a few moments had passed.

(Y/N) swiped away her tears and nodded even though he wasn’t able to see her. “Ok, Tommy,” she agreed, even though she knew that it would most likely be a moot promise.

“I have to go,” he told her then.

“Ok,” she nodded once more, “I love you.”

“I love you. Give the kids a kiss for me.”

“I will.”

The line went dead after she told him she would. (Y/N) hung the phone up and let out a shuddered sigh. She looked at the garland lined mantle for a minute before closing her eyes and silently hoping that Tommy’s promise would come true this time around.

The sentence “mumma, wake up!” graced (Y/N)’s ears at the beautiful hour of seven o’clock the next morning. The feeling of three, small bodies bouncing on the bed soon accompanied it, making the woman finally open her eyes.

She was reluctant to at first because she knew that doing so would bring her beautiful dream of sitting by Tommy while watching the kids play with their presents to an end. The sight of the empty spot next to her in bed still hit her like a ton of bricks even though she was prepared for it. She couldn’t dwell on it though, because the kids’ excitement increased tenfold the second they saw her eyes open.

“Let’s go downstairs!” Charlotte, the oldest of the three, declared as she hurried to get off of the bed and make her way to the door. Max and Henry - twins who were two years younger than Charlotte, quickly followed their sister, their excitement practically palpable.

(Y/N) couldn’t help but smile as she tossed the covers to the side and moved over to where her robe was hung on the dressing screen. She took the same path as her children once the cozy garment was tied tightly against her frame.

The children were already rooting around the gifts that were placed under the tree, trying to find the ones that had their names on it. (Y/N) smiled as she made her way over to the couch and sat down on it. A tinge of sadness crept up on her before she could stop it. Tommy should be here, she thought to herself as the children went about unwrapping their presents.

Tommy’s words from the previous evening then echoed in her mind: “I’ll be home for Christmas”. She wanted to badly to believe that and think nothing else. But that sadness still loomed.

The children were excited to have their mum unwrap the presents that they made for her once they were finished opening theirs, and (Y/N) was able to push the sadness away as she beamed at the thoughtful, homemade gifts they’d given her.

The gloomy feelings came back when the kids went back to playing with their toys and she was left alone on the couch once more. An even larger wave washed over her when she noticed the unopened presents that still sat under the tree. One of the tags was facing upwards, and the name ‘DAD’ was written on it in Charlotte’s unmistakeable hand.

“I’ll be home for Christmas,” Tommy’s words rang in her mind again. She sighed and hugged her robe tighter to her body before looking over to the clock. Only in my dreams, she thought as she tried to focus back on the kids.

(Y/N) and the children ate a wonderful breakfast before the three young ones quickly dragged her back into the front room so that they could continue playing. She’d just gotten comfortable under the blanket when the sound of tires on gravel was heard outside. It made her eyebrows furrow. The family wasn’t supposed to come over until later, she thought to herself as she glanced over at the clock sitting on the mantle. It was still early in the morning.

Then the worry started to set in. (Y/N) was no stranger to the type of business that Tommy was involved in. She was by his side while he created a name for himself, and she stayed with him every step of the way. He continuously assured her that no one would ever come to their home and attack their family, but (Y/N) still couldn’t get the possibility of it to leave her mind.

She was so engulfed in her thoughts that she didn’t hear Frances say “welcome home, Mr. Shelby. They’re in the front room,” as her husband entered the foyer. It didn’t even set in as Tommy appeared in the archway, and the three children went running over to greet their father.

Things didn’t become clear until Charlotte turned to face her and exclaimed: “mumma! Dad’s home!”

Then everything came into view. Charlotte with a wide smile on her face. Max and Henry in their father’s arms. And Tommy. Tommy was looking right at her with one of the widest smiles she’s seen from him in a long time.

“Let’s go over and see your mum, eh?” Tommy said to his sons before he made his way over to the couch. Max and Henry wriggled out of his arms once he stopped in front of (Y/N), clambering up into her lap to give her a hug and a kiss before they went back to their new toys.

Tommy’s eyes quickly found (Y/N)’s once it was just the two of them. “You made it home,” she said, her smile practically stretching from ear to ear.

“I told you I’d be home from Christmas, love,” he answered, winking as he sent her a grin.

“C’mere, Tommy,” she held her hands out to him, and he got the idea, sitting down next to her on the couch. (Y/N) didn’t waste a second, throwing her arms around his frame and practically climbing into his lap as she hugged him tightly. “I’m so happy you’re home,” she whispered into his neck as she nestled her face deeper into it.

“Wouldn’t miss Christmas with you for the world,” he told her, his hands finding her shoulders then. She took it as a hint and lifted her head to look at him. “I love you,” (Y/N),” he said as he reached up and ran his hand down her cheek. She leaned into his touch, her smile widening before she closed the gap between them to press her lips to his.

The kiss was filled with so much love, and (Y/N) would have happily held it longer if her lungs weren’t screaming for air. She was the one to pull away, but she didn’t move far, opting to rest her forehead against his. “I love you, Tommy. Merry Christmas,” she breathed, her eyes still closed as she reveled in his presence.

“Merry Christmas,” he responded in a similar tone, his arms moving to wrap around her frame.

“Dad! We have presents for you!” Charlotte’s excited voice broke into their reverie moments later.

(Y/N) moved slightly so that she was now sitting next to him, and Tommy managed to tuck one of his arms behind her back - in efforts to keep her as close as possible - before their children came over to him with presents in hand.

“Open mine first!” Max exclaimed, thrusting the small box into his father’s lap.

Tommy smiled at the boy before he went about opening the present. (Y/N) watched on with a smile, knowing exactly what her husband was getting and how excited their son was to give it to him. Max let out like giggles of excitement as Tommy took the silver tie clasp that had a horse’s head on it out of its holder.

“Do you like it?” the boy asked with anticipation.

“I love it,” Tommy smiled before adding, “I’ll wear it the first chance I get.”

Henry gave him the next gift, which was a fancy pen that the boy had picked out himself. He said that Tommy could use it to write all of ‘his important letters’. Tommy made a promise to use it as his only pen from then on.

Then it was Charlotte’s turn. “Be careful when unwrapping it, dad. It’s fragile,” she gave a warning, one which Tommy chuckled at but also heeded to. “Do you like it?” she asked, like her younger brother had, when it was completely unwrapped.

Tommy didn’t say anything at first. Instead he stared at the present. (Y/N) peered over his shoulder to see what it was. Charlotte had been keeping it a secret from everybody. What Tommy was holding made (Y/N)’s heart swell. It was a hand drawn picture of her family - Tommy and (Y/N) stood on either side, then Max and Henry were standing next to them. In the middle was Charlotte, holding both of her brothers’ hands while she was wearing her favorite, purple colored dress. (Y/N) also didn’t miss the fact that Tommy, Max and Henry were all wearing a peaked cap.

“Do you like it?” Charlotte asked again, getting slightly impatient as her father was taking too long.

“I love it, sweetheart,” Tommy answered, finally looking up to smile at his daughter, “it’s perfect, Charlie,” he added, sounding choked up.

“It’s our family!” Charlotte exclaimed, a beaming smile now present on her face.

“It is,” Tommy nodded, “and it’s going in a frame so that it can sit on me desk.”

“So you can look at it always?” she asked.

“So I can look at it always,” he answered with a nod. Charlotte then rushed to get onto the couch so that she could hug her father.

(Y/N) quickly took the picture out of Tommy’s hands before it would get crumbled. She couldn’t help but smile as she looked down at it. Everything she needed in life was present in that picture…and was sitting beside her on the couch.

She was thankful that Tommy was able to make it home for Christmas.

Tagged: @mystcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @theshelbyslimited @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @emotionalcadaver @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @cillmequick @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @gypsy-girl-08 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @raincoffeeandfandoms @dragons-are-my-favorite @acewritesfics @forgottenpeakywriter @cljordan-imperium @brummiereader @areyenotfondofmelobster @everythingelseisextra @little-diable @thomashelbyswife @shaddixlife

MASTERLIST

Listen to Brett Eldredge’s version of I’ll Be Home For Christmas:

HERE.

[bambisnc]

dreams come true? i sure hope they don’t. [ft. h.yj]

pairing : han yujin x f!reader <3 genre : so so crack. + lil bit fluffy cw/tw : uneditted + beverage mention + lmk if there r more sobs wc : 0.6k !! <3

“wait so let me get this straight- you like someone.. and instead of doing anything rational, or god forbid even half-normal about it; you’re trying out wikihow rituals to manipulate her dreams?!”

yujin at least has the decency to look sheepish. yeah okay so maybe he did have a crush on a certain someone, namely you, and yeah maybe he was a little too anxious to approach you.

and.. yeah maybe he happened to come across an article which taught him how to alter your dreams via a simple ritual. 

writing out the name of your ~beloved~ along with a detailed description of the dream you wished for them to have on a piece of paper, place 9 orange and purple streaked moonstones on it and crumpling up the paper – was, as the site declared confidently, enough to be able to make yourself a constant presence in the dreams of whomever you wished.

as long as he remembered to loudly announce the exact minutes for which he’d known the aforementioned beloved before starting, that is.

well, yujin thought, it seemed harmless enough.

except some part of him did consider it necessary to do a couple of trial runs. he wouldn’t want you to start having dreams of, say, student council member ahn yujin or that new girl choi yujin who had been a little too friendly with you these past few days. there were a lot of yujin’s around weren't there..

which is what lead to you having a series of rather odd dreams. and the subsequent amount of time you spent lowkey freaking out about them. 

“gyuvin i swear i wasn’t even thinking about greek gods at all before i fell asleep,” you vent to him one day at lunch, “but i was somehow a mermaid god or something?? AND hades, you know, the god of the underworld, was kinda beefing with me for no reason?!”

your friend who is unfortunately sworn to secrecy by yujin tries his best to distract you, “c’mon dreams are contractually meant to be weird; stop overthinking it! and besides-”

“BUT LISTEN when i woke up the first audio i heard, i think some video that yujin sent me, was about greek gods!! this has happened way too many times for me to put it off as a coincidence!!”

“i think you’re just delusional (like some other people i know..)”

you simply sigh out, “sorry, what was that?” not too willing to expend more energy in trying to convince him that your problem is very valid; and he’s just being very unsupportive of you right now.

"..." you suppose you'll have to make peace with the fact that your subconscious was probably just in a silly phase.

-

distant sounds of students leaving after evening classes, rustling of trees with a gentle breeze.. and a flick to your forehead?!

your eyes flutter open, more than eager to chastise whoever had thought it okay to break your comfortable reverie. but when your gaze lands on him, han yujin, you feel your complaints dying down. he’s holding out your favorite beverage to you; a soft smile adorning his face. 

before you can let out a single word though, there’s.. another flick to your forehead?? what do people have against you..

your eyes flutter open (again?), more than eager to reprimand whoever thought it okay to break your .. wait had you been dreaming just now? 

you find yourself with your cheek resting against a table. the one who flicked your forehead yet again appears to be yujin. 

his eyes seem to twinkle slightly as he says, “i thought we were going to get our science assignment done yn? or did you plan on doing it while asleep? i so did not expect this from yo-”

“hey.,” you interrupt, “han yujin. you’re free now right? wanna go on a date with me?”

safe to say that you received a very positive response, especially with his now-flustered appearance.

gyuvin really should learn to keep his mouth shut, huh?

notes : @mellowdyverse MAIIII here u go love <3 i hope this wasnt horrific im struggling tm w writers block + [m.list] + woah the coloured text is going crazyy js ignore that hehe <3 song rec : nightwalker by ten tho. it has nothing 2 do w this but its so yumi likee

[theladybrownstarot]

YOUR VIBES ~•☆°○•°○°

Pick a card reading~

~☆°○•SOME WORDS AND THINGS BEFORE YOU BEGIN:-

♡》Hi everyone I'm brown ♡ and back with an another pac to amaze and hype you with!

♡》Do support Me by comment/like/reblog/follow to help me grow here ♡🤍🖤♡!

♡》Love you bye bye so let's begin with your reading ~ so choose a pile(s) you feel drawn to most ~♡

Pile 1. Pile 2. Pile 3.

Pile 1.

🖤 okay , i see that your vibes are giving like as of rise of Phoenix or wake up or glow up or the rise of great✨️ .

🤍 pile 1 . people think you as someone who is now rising or we say they think and feel that it's your time now to shine and do great 😆. People used to think that you won't show up or have something inside you so great but now you have realized that what you have got and what do you want and need to do 😃😎. People think that you are kinda someone who gifts themselves a lot like such things which are your requirements only 📦 🎁. You keep your plans to yourself but you are open to talk to people and guide them too . You don't show a lot of facial expression plus your face gives the vibe of someone mature also . you people are grounded too~ and must have big 3s in earth sign also.

🖤 People get that clear ,concise , straight forward and to the point kind of person 📈. People feel your vibes as of someone who is fast and knows what to do and how to do now like you aren't indecisive at all ; you know how to make clear decisions and give good judgements . You see more deep , you are curious and tries to know more . People wanna approach you and ask you that how did you do it ? 😏

🤍 They think of you who doesn't rush into things and work🌱 . you take things slowly and calmly for sure and try to maintain your consistency by making little-little steps 🍂also that you must be observant and someone who is cautious just to make sure you aren't taking risks at all in your work .

🖤 You people vibe as a dry to green tree🍁 . You are a home person and travels less also . Might like village areas far from city . You people are workaholics but at times you get kind a away from your path maybe because of of health issues also 😯.

🤍you people are mysterious and have high patience and endurance of things . You might day dream a lot also . People get the vibes from you as like this person is fated to be great now ! btw get an evil eye protection charm for yourself😇 .

🖤 You people have learnt to take control on your pessimistic thoughts and life too ~ you have the blessings from your god and if you are an indian don't worry take the name of lord ganesha🙏🇮🇳 to remove obstacles. people you are clear and strong minded -it's hard to defeat you but i sense some people are still in the progress to make themselves up ! just leave your past and face your fears ~!🫰🏼💪

Pile 2 .

🤍 Hi pile no. 2 ! hru ? enjoying your life or every moment of it ?! yess ! that's what i'm getting from you my sunshine, you shine like sun ,star and moon ~ 🌚☀️⭐️

🖤 you know people get that vibe of you who is jovial in nature wise, likes to enjoy every second of life or trying to enjoy the present with gratitude and happiness rather than being sad oho people you know your shine sometimes makes people jealous of you too😃😊😏🫰🏽 ~ but don't mind them because you are a good person who isn't interested to take hurt and take advantage of others 🫂 knowing that in this world of harshness and darkness people struggle to come as happy individual too ~ you are a beauty with with brain , someone who is motherly , caring or your face could be motherly , who is a marriage material , dream person , a lot feminine and romantic ❤️ .

🤍 I sense that you spread kindness , compassion to others rather than hate and grief alas i hope people may get the shine like you people do ! also that you are someone who is a lot recognized by higher people and authorities also that you could be authoritative and strong headed . You are transparent also someone who is ready to give their hand to people to come up . I love you pile 2 . you are humanitarian! you are selfless ♡.

🖤 People vibe with you with rose and sun flowers and also that you like taking pics with flowers for sure . you love flowers and like to live around nature too ~ 😃😯🌹🌻

🤍 People think of you also as a prankster , someone who is bit lazy😆 to take responsibilities and someone who gets blamed also mostly🥲 . People are jealous and angry because they think you aren't serious but reality is something else pile 2 . isn't it ?;)

Possible that you don't take nonsense from other and can handle a lot of people at once! 💪🏼

🖤 You could be in a certain community , group or club that has people like you or in the community , place or work you are mostly loved and given attention to most as you could be a lot vocal and expressive too . You people must be into law of ♡♡ manifestations a lot i see and believe in universe so much that it has helped you to take your burden off also .

Pile 3 .

🤍 People think of you as someone who isn't judgmental regarding anyone . They feel comfortable around you because you are those type of people who doesn't make people feel like outsiders . You like to share your happiness with others irrespective of age , color , gender or caste vice-versa 🫂🫰🏽. You believe in sharing of things . People might feel that you are the center of attention and you give attention to everyone equally ⭐️. you present yourself as a good and gentle being. You people and grounded and strong - which makes people think that they can't defeat you 💪🏼.

🖤 You are a person who has a lot of achievements - not especially some awards or medals but achievements of your own that you made in your life by yourself😌. You people take life in a flow not in a hurry or mess 🌬🌊. You people can even enjoy alone like you can dance at any place , you can start speaking like a politician or a debater at any place without thinking much of people 😆😃. You give yourself chance first or keep yourself as a priority like you have your own voice and opinion in things 🫰🏽.

🤍 You people might me psychics like tarot card readers , astrologers, intuitive or you can a strong 6th sense 🔮 . People think that you have the answer for everything 🤓 . Some people think and vibe with you as their random guide at any point of time 😁 . Your feelings and gut are strong for sure plus i can see that you are spiritual and read a lot of text and holy books and can practicse mindfulness for sure 🙏🫰🏼🌱.

🖤 People might feel that until and unless they don't approach you , you won't approach them 🫡🤐😑 . People might vibe you with a tree - mature , silent , helpful ,selfless , knowledgeable and someone with extras , you might keep a bunch of things with you in your bag let's say i carry medicine , face wash and cucumber water when i go outside ; people think me as someone who is full and got everything that they need and wish for so goes same for you 🫂.

🤍 People think that you will be a great personality in coming time or in near future because you are developing and growing yourself by hiding from the world. I think you love peace and unity among everyone .🤫 🧿

🖤 You people are a warrior like you have experienced few major events in life and a great lover too ~ You will have great options in terms of love soon . You people are perceived as someone beautiful and graceful for sure . Don't be insecure regarding your looks because what matters is the personality and inner-self 😊🌹 .

End of the pac☆°○••°

SO, HOW WAS THIS PAC ? DID IT RESONATE ?

MAKE SURE YOU SUPPORT YOUR FAVOURITE READERS BY A LIKE/REBLOG/COMMENT/FOLLOW !

FOLLOW ME FOR MORE CONTENT THAT WILL HELP YOU TO GROW AND KNOW YOURSELF MORE ♡

[breelandwalker]

Cold Moon - December 26, 2023

Bundle up, witches! It's time for the Cold Moon!

Cold Moon

The Cold Moon is the name given to the full moon which occurs in the month of December, particularly appropriate this year as the full moon will occur late in the month, smack in the middle of the bleak midwinter.

This will be another month when the moon appears full for two nights in a row, so we'll have a full moon for Christmastime, with peak illumination on Dec 26th at 7:33pm EST. (A perfect aesthetic for those who are fans of the classic poem "A Visit From St Nicholas" aka "Twas the Night Before Christmas." Personally, I'm holding out hope that we'll have the snowy conditions to match, though it's a long shot.)

Like most full moon names, the Cold Moon takes its' moniker from an English translation of a traditional name used by one or more North American indigenous groups. There are a number of indigenous names that reference the wintry conditions when this moon occurs, including Snow Moon (Haida, Cherokee), Winter Moon (Tunica-Biloxi), Hoar Frost Moon (Cree), and Long Night Moon (Mohican). More evocative names include Frost Exploding Trees Moon (Cree) and Moon of the Popping Trees (Oglala), both of which refer to a phenomenon which occurs during extreme cold, when the sap inside a tree freezes and the expanding pressure causes portions of the bark or even entire limbs to "pop" with loud cracking sounds that can be heard for miles.

Other names for the December moon include Yule Moon (Norse origins), Oak Moon (Celtic origins), and Bitter Moon (Chinese origins).

What Does It Mean For Witches?

The year is winding down. It's time to wrap up our projects and put aside what we haven't finished or no longer need. Rather than berating ourselves for the things we didn't finish or didn't accomplish, this is a time to give ourselves some grace and celebrate our successes and triumphs and the things we DID accomplish.

With only one page left on the calendar, many of us are already looking ahead to the new year, making plans and setting goals. This is a good time to brainstorm and engage in a bit of broad-view planning. Sketch out the things you'd like to see or do or try in the new year. Give voice to your dreams and start thinking of ways to make them happen.

The Cold Moon also falls soon after the winter solstice this year (Dec 21), which could be a boon for anyone looking to time their seasonal rituals in optimal fashion. A working could be begun on the solstice and built up to culminate on the night of the Cold Moon, just before the start of a new calendar year.

What Witchy Things Can We Do?

Have a small supper gathering with friends or family (holiday themed or not, it's up to you) to share joys and fellowship and enjoy good food and drink. Make wishes together for the new year. (Wish jars can be done individually or as an informal group ritual. Sharing wishes anonymously can be a fun party game.) A "White Elephant" gift exchange with inexpensive or homemade witchy goods for your circle could be fun too!

Make a wish jar for the new year on the winter solstice and put it out to charge under the Cold Moon. Cleanse any of your tools or crystals or accoutrements that you use moonlight for one more time this year.

This is the perfect time for divinations and goalsetting for the coming year. Pull out your favorite divination tools and your 2024 planner and sketch out the coming year. You can also try candle wax divination with holiday candles, if that's something that interests you.

Also, save those seasonal bayberry candles for future use! They're great for debt repayment and money-drawing spells.

If you need some ideas for a fun family activity, you can feed the birds for good luck, either with scattered birdseed or pinecone birdfeeders. String dried fruit slices, cinnamon sticks, pinecones, holly leaves and berries, and other seasonal faves to make garlands. Stick apples or oranges or clementines full of cloves in pretty patterns to make pomanders.

Use those fibre arts skills to create a special piece to keep your home warm and safe and well-supplied until spring. It doesn't have to be anything big - a simple weaving or single square will do. Crochet or cut out snowflakes for your home decor. If you want to get fancy, pick up a ball of cotton warp thread and look for old doily patterns - they look great as hoop weavings hung on the wall (or make a witch web in winter colors).

Make one more batch of moonwater to carry you through to the new year. If it happens to snow or freeze where you live, you can save clean snow or icicles for special (non-drinkable) elemental water, which can be a fun base for moonwater as well.

And speaking of elements, make sure to remember in all your seasonal decorating that fire safety is paramount. Be careful with your candles, warmers, light strings, plugs, extension cords, and cables. DO NOT "daisy chain" your extension cords or power strips. Never leave candles or wax warmers or simmer pots unattended, and turn off your holiday lights before bedtime. Safety first, witches!

Thanks for joining me for this exploration of full moon magic. See you next year!

Happy Cold Moon, witches! 🌕🧊

Further Reading:

Additional Lunar Calendar posts

Moon Rise Calculator - The Old Farmer's Almanac.

Cold Moon: Full Moon in December 2023, The Old Farmer's Almanac.

Full Moon December 2023: Illuminating the Cold Moon's Spiritual Meaning, The Peculiar Brunette.

How Do Trees Survive The Winter?, National Forest Foundation.

How to Make Pomander Balls, The Old Farmer's Almanac.

Fun Kid's Activity: Winter Pinecone Bird Feeder, Audubon Southwest.

Everyday Moon Magic: Spells & Rituals for Abundant Living, Dorothy Morrison, Llewellyn Publications, 2004.

(If you’re enjoying my content, please feel free to drop a little something in the tip jar or check out my published works on Amazon or in the Willow Wings Witch Shop. 😊)

[insidemyrottenbrain]

Years later - TSH

Henry Marchbanks Winter x GN!Reader

Word count: 1666

TW: religious imagery

Out of guilt and dread you end up leaving Vermont and building a new life. Just as you thought you escaped your past, you once again find yourself in its grasp.

The past haunts me. It has been years—so many I cannot begin to count, and if I’m being completely honest, I was not counting to begin with. Everything I have done was to escape that wretched part of my life in which my naivety and perhaps self-consuming passion, managed to control me. I wanted—want—to forget it all. 

The first time I stepped foot into what would soon come to be one of the few select places in my nightmares was very awe-inducing. The university was large, larger than I’d imagined. The stone walls had arched indents that made it look as if it belonged in one of the novels I read as a teenager and that my family wholeheartedly despised. The hallways were a contorted maze of watchful ancient statues following every movement with their eyes, priceless antiques donated by rich parents and students with more money in their pockets than I could ever dream of having. A multitude of departments found their home in that twisted place, such as theater, arts, modern literature, architecture, history, music, philosophy, and more. I believe you can imagine my excitement when faced with the exact kind of university I dreamed of studying at, especially when I had little to no hope of ever getting anywhere close to it, much less belonging.

One thing, as you know, led to another, and I ended up as one of the infamous Greek pupils. I’m quite sure everyone thought we were some kind of cult, which, if you think about it, isn’t entirely wrong.

The first few years were everything I had ever hoped for. I felt that I had found my place and, most certainly, my kind. We used to do everything together. Being with them was the only time I truly felt alive. It doesn’t matter whether we went to the comforting country house engulfed in trees safely from the outside world, had delicious dinners debating the most obscure topics, or simply studied in the library, sleep-deprived and on immense amounts of caffeine, I always felt as if I was doing something more than just existing.

Where did it all go wrong? I wouldn’t be able to tell you. I do not want to categorize Richard’s arrival as the initiator factor, for it was not his fault. Nor is it correct to say that the Bacchanal was the beginning of it all. It wouldn’t be Henry’s doing either, at least not the start of it. I have speculated on this over the years, and I have come to only one conclusion that seems right. My theory as to what the answer is and my attempt to pinpoint the exact place on the timeline are not as precise as I hoped they would be. It was not a single event that gave birth to our ruin, but rather multiple little moments, that are rather large in the big scheme. I also like to believe that Julian had as much of a role in all of this as the rest of us. Perhaps, even a considerably more sizeable one.

Everything that happened—I wish to leave behind. However, I recently came to realise, that, to my misery, it incorporated and formed my very being. My views, my ideas, my tastes, and my activities are all, to a certain extent, if not fully influenced and ruled over by it. I am my past.

My great, futile attempts to escape the life I once had, led me to London, a perfect setting for someone who wished to hide. A bustling place, where I had the chance to not be me, but a mere shadow lurking throughout the crowded streets, observing every passerby, while trying to guess their life stories, deepest desires, and strongest fears. I was no one, and I adored it. However, my presence became known among museum guides and librarians for its consistency. I have also earned a reputation among university students for being one of the few odd professors. This is probably due to the fact that I am very selective with my pupils, and I teach a couple that are quite brilliant in my office. I often have open discussions with them, for I consider it helps them engage with the topic better and understand the meaning and philosophy behind it in such a way that encourages them to analyze, observe, and critique. One such day, we were talking about the loss of self, Plato’s four divine madnesses:

‘Death is the mother of beauty,’ said Felix, one of my students.

I nodded in approval as I propped myself up on the desk.

‘And what is beauty?’ 

‘Terror,’ a voice answered from my office’s door.

My life up until this moment, along with all my darkest memories and the series of events that led me to where I am today, flash before my eyes, and it feels as if the universe has stopped specifically to play along with his sadistic trick. My jaw clenches involuntarily, my eyes threaten to betray my emotions, and I have to remind myself I’m not the same brainless kid chasing empty promises and impossible dreams, fully convinced that every existing land, no matter how vast it may be, is my playground and that fate will bend according to my petulant will. I have to get out of my head, the silence is stretching. My students, probably confused, are expecting some kind of sign from my disordered self. He is waiting for a reaction. The past has finally caught up to me. After all my futile attempts, it still managed to intrude on my present’s doorway. 

I take a deep breath. I look at my students, curiosity mixed with confusion clear in their expressions. I don’t need to look at him to know who he is.

‘I apologize,’ I start hoping that they cannot hear the tremble in my voice as accentuated as I seem to do, ‘class is dismissed.’

I need not say more before my students start gathering their belongings in complete silence so as to not further disturb the room completely filled with palpable animosity and perhaps something more vivid, cursed to lurk in the depths of our minds. I reach blindly toward my pack of cigarettes, lying somewhere on my desk between books and coffee-stained papers. Lucky Strikes, yet another sign of his hold on me. I light my cigarette, breathing in the curls of smoke spiraling down my throat. The sound of his leather shoes clicking against the wooden floorboards reverberates through my beating heart. I am well aware that even now, after years of attempting to escape from the rosary He entangled around my neck, I am still His most loyal devotee, respecting vigilantly every silent command. Deep and numbing smoke inside my lungs, like a relaxant, washes me with warm Indian summer waves of calmness.

He is fixating me with his cold blue eyes, watching for any sign of defiance. Over the years I’ve spent in his presence, I’ve learned to recognize his transitive facial expressions, his secretive ways, and his small habits, whether it is the way he holds a page between his fingers before turning it or his tendency to dive into long monologues about whatever interests him at that moment. It is a distinct ability that has grown its roots along my blood vessels, twisted and intertwined beyond differentiation. Understanding each other used to be our way of showing our affection. It is something so sacred that I cannot bring myself to weaponize against him and betray the bond we once had. You’d think that after so much time I’d be able to break free from the shackles His divinity holds me in and convert to a different faith. But He is nestled so deeply in me, that I cannot help but like the burns and the imprints upon my skin.

Henry Marchbanks Winter looks the same. But he now has a new pair of glasses and slight crow’s feet, along with faint smile lines framing his lips. He’s wearing one of his dark English suits, which have always fit him incredibly well. And if the wrinkles weren’t enough, the few grey hairs peeking from underneath the familiar dark colour of his hair are a brutal reminder of how much of him I missed. A cruel admonitum of the years that have passed and of all the times I wasn’t next to him, not by chance but by choice. It takes all I have in me to not fall to my knees, confess my sin, and beg for forgiveness. As if all the years I’ve been away from him turned into mere days I find myself falling back to my old habits and once again bowing down to his silent command.

Amor dominus terribilis est.

The cigarette burns, forgotten between my fingers, as I get wasted on his scent, for once, unbothered by the consequences.

‘I’ve finally found you, dilectus.’ Beloved.

‘I suppose you have.’ I cannot help but stare at him, hypnotized by the storm in his eyes.

‘I have been searching for you since the day you left.’ He reaches a gentle, steady hand to brush my cheek ‘London of all places-’

As much as I wish to let him hold me again I find myself interrupting him. ‘You have no business here.’ I walk to the open window and take my second drag from the almost fully burned cigarette.

He sighs, frustration slipping through the cracks of his perfection.

‘Like it or not,’ he emanates divine turmoil as he emphasizes every word  ‘you are my business.’

‘After so long we can’t be anything but strangers.’

‘You are wrong.’ He states immediately as I finish the sentence. ‘You cannot act as if you have forgotten everything we’ve been through.’ His hand once again finds its way to my face and caresses it with smooth, slow motions. This time I let him. ‘One more chance is all I ask for.’ He whispered.

‘One more chance.’ I agree, defeated.

[sol-lar-bink]

Queen Veronica the Fifth (V)! The Late Queen of Venostar, and Toxecia's mother. Vivi for short because 'Veronica V'.

I've been meaning to put her ref together for a while. Have a bonus Riki Fuhrmann style of her too (: Plus child Toxecia.

vvv Some info under the cut! vvv

A rather strict Queen, but she cared for her people and her family, and was overall cherished in the kingdom. She's the Fifth Veronica in a massive family tree of royal spiders. She's a mix of bossy and nice, a caring person hidden behind a status to uphold. She has a rather deep, sultry voice.

She took her role very seriously as Queen, the result of generations of Queens passing their hopes and dreams onto their children. Why is that, you might ask? It's because their species have very short lifespans... barely able to live longer than 40 years. A bad gene or something, that kinda just... kills them after a certain amount of time. Venostar scientists have been studying how to rid this gene for almost 100 years to allow a Queen to live a fully prosperous life.

Her husband (To be named + designed) was the perfect balance she needed in her life. Fun, full of energy, silly and hopelessly romantic. He's basically like Asgore without the murdering kids part lmao. With him, Veronica almost seems like a different person.

Together they have Toxecia, their darling little daughter. Sadly Veronica and Tox don't get along very well for the majority of their life, and Tox finds more comfort with her father. He taught her how to use a sword during their time together.

As a child, Tox develops an over-productive poison gland. It first occurs during a speech Veronica is giving to the kingdom. That day would send the family into a depressive spiral.

Most of the kingdom views Toxecia as a freak, a cursed child. She can't leave the castle without leaving a trail of paralyzing poison around the town. Eventually Veronica prevents her from leaving the castle unattended. Tox would only go into town with her father from there on out... until the day that he passes away, when Tox was a young teen.

Veronica and Tox both suffer from this loss. Veronica missing that positive, lighthearted personality that helped her for so long, and Tox losing a lot of confidence. Tox inherits her dads Sword (The one Veronica is holding in the 2nd pic)

Veronica would try to find a new love, but struggled to do so. She became more flirty in this time, and also more depressed. She had gotten close to another female spider at least, but that was a secret kept to them alone 🤫

Sadly, as her time was coming, she prepared Toxecia to inherit the throne, and Veronica would pass away when Tox was barely 18.

She remains buried beside her husband. Tox visits their grave weekly, even if they didn't get along, she misses them both... the royal advisor takes her parents place now.

Alone and young, Toxecia goes on to rule a kingdom that rejects her.

[kyumisyumi]

Garden for two

Step 1: Make granny coded OC Step 2: Nickname her little Babushka Step 3: Ship her with the Russian

Ship: Nikto x F!OC (Adlean)

Word count: 4k

⊱⊶Taking requests⊷⊰

It was only an inch, just the smallest little bit over the border; that's what Adlean told herself in the beginning. Then came any other weak excuse she could muster to turn that inch into a meter and that meter into the whole yard. That little devil on her shoulder gave any and all excuses it could for her to keep expanding on this little project. 'The neighbor hasn't appeared for months...', 'he probably wouldn't even mind a little bit of maintenance on his lawn...', 'if he cared he would've petitioned for a fence...' and so on and so on. Until her voice and that devil's were indiscernible. Until it was only hers.

Adlean hadn't thought it would've gone this far. She'd raised a few houseplants, yeah, but had no real gardening nor landscaping skills to rely on. Just some YouTube tutorials and a dream. Yet, as she got one section done and then another and another, it became harder to stop. So enamored by an idea coming together and it being by her own unskilled hands. One of those rare times she'd set out to do something and it was actually done right. She'd chosen clover to replace the generic grass turf. A young cherry blossom here, a stone pathway there; sheet mulch and cover crops. Aside from native wildflowers there were handful of foreign flora that looked too good to resist in her eyes. Plus a few easy to grow crops the store recommended. Some ceramic decor, garden trellis, fairy lights. She went far over her budget turning this place into a scene from a fantasy novel, evidenced by the weeks worth of cheap ramen filling her kitchen; all she'd be able to afford for a while. But in the end, it genuinely looked wonderful, like one of those images you come across on pinterest.

However.

As large as her yard was, the need to keep going flowed strong in her veins even after every inch was fully decorated. Pulsing from her head to her heart to her hands as though Mother Nature herself was guiding her trowel. She hadn't gone as overboard on her neighbor's lawn; no trees, no ponds, just some wildflowers and better turf and a few mini garden figures hidden along the edges. Adlean figured if her mythical neighbor ever did show up and express distaste, she'd simply apologize profusely and undo her handywork. Alternatively, she'd hoped they might completely fall in love with the lawn and thank her for being so wonderful. They'd bake her a cake she'd weakly refuse and she'd make them cookies, cementing the perfect neighborly relationship she so greatly yearned for.

What she hadn't planned for were the angry yells and curses coming from a brick wall of a silhouette who was rapidly banging on her door.

"Roderick! Cволочь![bastard!] Get your fucking ass out here and explain this rubbish."

God, he was so loud. She could only imagine what the neighbors were thinking. Hopefully they'd at least poke their heads out to act as witnesses if things went bad. She was shaking in the little hallway that lead to her front door, rethinking her life choices and wishing she could undo the past- actually fighting the devil on her shoulder rather than giving in to it's mischievous whispers. Adlean momentarily considered calling the police to mediate but that would just unsettle the whole block of nosey elderly people that populated the cul-de-sac. Not to mention it might effectively deteriorate any chance of her being on decent terms with the person she would have to share a house with. That was something she didn't want to experience again; making enemies among neighbors was the reason she'd moved here to begin with. So, despite how much she didn't want to, despite how much her muscles tensed while her fingers shook, she approached the front door and opened it.

'I'M SO SORRY!' She thought the words but couldn't bring herself to say it, lips pursed in fear and anxiety the moment she got a proper view of the absolute unit in front of her. Compared to her, he was a giant, blocking any light from penetrating beyond her doorway and casting her in his shade. The man was wearing full black, with only a tacky gold chain dangling from his neck to stop him from looking like a humanoid shadow that had manifesting on her front steps. Terrifying. The balaclava concealing everything but the anger in his eyes didn't help either.

"What is this? Where is the bastard? He sends woman to face his problems." The man shifted forward as if he was going to try to push past her into her own home but thought better of it.

Nikto's momentary confusion at seeing the small black girl instead of the lanky white man he knew to live next to him had caused enough bewilderment to dampen his anger... for now. He studied her for a moment; she was short, barely tall enough to reach his chest and the many layers of oversized clothing didn't help. She wore light colors; baby blues, greens and whites, a large woolen coat over a sweater and skirt that reached her ankles. Her face was round and held brown almond eyes, a pointed nose and thick lips. Large framed glasses were perched on the tip of her nose, the plastic a matching shade of blue. Atop her head was a hefty mass of dreadlocks wrapped into a bun that was almost as large as her head. Looked heavy too. He brought his gaze back to her face, she was doing well to hide the distress in her features but Nikto could see the way her fingers gripped the ends of her sleeves for dear life. At first he thought her lips were pursed in annoyance but Nikto soon realised they were locked in fear, quivering slightly at the edges. He'd scared the poor thing. 'Fucking hell' He cursed to himself, the smallest drop of guilt creeping in for terrifying some random woman.

"Listen, didn't mean for- nevermind, who are you?" He asked, voice sounding like it grated against every surface of his throat before exiting his lips.

She took a moment, looking behind him to check for an audience. "I'm Adlean, I rent this side of the house. I assume you're my neighbor." Common courtesy had her wanting to say 'nice to meet you' but...

"Ahh, so not Roderick anymore." He tsked.

Adlean couldn't tell if he was happy or upset to hear the news. "No, I've been here for about 4 months now." She shifted uncomfortably. "Look, I'm sorry for messing around in your backyard. I got a little carried away and the home has been empty for so long I wasn't even sure if you existed. I'll remove it all, starting tomorrow... or pay to have someone deconstruct your lawn if you prefer." She spoke quickly, he could almost hear the regret in her tone.

Nikto contemplated for a while, or at least he pretended to. It gave him more time to watch the woman squirm in front of him- a bully, even in guilt. "We will give this some thought." He sighed, his body sagging slightly as his anger simmered.

"Alright." Adlean said quietly. "You can leave a note in my mailbox when you decide." She slanted the door, giving him time to spill any more grievances before closing it.

Nikto stared at the closed door for a while before retreating to his side of the home. He was no longer angry but his body had built up so much of it that it now bounced around his skull, waiting to be converted into some other emotion.

So he had a new neighbor now. Good. He hated the slimy bastard who would leave dog shit in his yard and fill his trashcans while he was gone. Instead he now had a neighbor who seemed to like messing around on other people's property. He strolled to the window and pulled back the curtains, looking out at the wilderness she'd turn his yard into. It wasn't bad, the plant-life seemed haphazard at first but now that he'd taken a second look he could see they were laid out with purpose. He wasn't sure what he thought at first; that Roderick had thrown random turf and weed into his yard out of spite or to monopolize the space somehow. A small part of him almost welcomed the conflict, a nice little spat before he would settle into the mundane.

He looked over on her side where her skills really shone through, it was pretty but he was sure as hell glad she kept it to her side. Nikto's eyes shifted to the movement along the side of the house, watching as his neighbor 'Adlean' left her home. Distress remained in her features as she looked around briefly before making her way to a spot beneath a small canopy, a book in one hand and a tumbler in the other. He watched her settle onto the grass, leaning slightly against the young pink tree. Nikto told himself that he was only watching to learn about the stranger he would have to partially share a space with. It was only natural he'd want details on someone within proximity... He watched her toy with the cover of the book, lifting it as if to open it but letting it shut close again and again. Her chest rose and fell into a sigh, too distracted maybe, before looking over at the likely source of her ire; his side of the property. Her gaze ran over the fence and flowers and pathway of mulch before eventually landing on the house, the window and him. She visibly stiffened before hurriedly averting her eyes.

Nikto stayed for a moment longer before leaving the window.

Nikto wouldn't hesitate to admit himself a pervert at times. He could appreciate a woman's body, the things they can do and how they make him feel. However, he never fancied himself a creep, not until now at least. Only a handful of days had passed since he'd returned home from deployment and what should've been a time of -fitful and fleeting- relaxation was instead a slow decent into madness. His body moved as it should; it woke, it cooked, it sat in front of the tv for hours before resting again. However, within his mangled head was a spider weaving silk. Its hairline triggers spreading through his ears and along every surface connecting his home to hers. Waiting for the telltale vibration of nearby movement; prey. He would know the moment she'd step outside into her yard to read or maintain her garden. Her door neither slammed nor creaked but he would hear it, would feel it, would sense it with an acuteness that was usually reserved for the battlefield. And as though it were protocol, he would be by a window, hidden from her curious glances at his home.

'Adlean' was nothing compared to the Slavic goddesses his homeland produced. Their beauty was bold, sharp, stunning in a way that both defined and challenged the concept of beauty itself. Hers was... mild, delicate, a type you'd miss if you looked away too fast. Where his type of women would strut as though the ground would rise to meet their feet, she glided unhindered and unbothered. He had his preference and it wasn't her, yet, here he was glued to a window like a mut watching their owner pull into the driveway after a long days work. His eyes drinking her in as though she was the only source of clean water for miles and he was cursed with perpetual thirst. He would drink and drink and drink and never have his fill. Maybe if he got to look closer; shoved his head into the oasis rather than graze his hand along the surface to sip from his palms. Maybe then his lips would no longer be dry and his stomach no longer crumbling inward in it's pursuit of sustenance.

But therein lied a problem; the duality of a man like him who liked pretty things but could only mar them. If she was an untouched fragment of nature then he was mankind; giving it an appreciative glance before bulldozing it to build a highway. Nikto looked down at his hands, his fingers secreting ichor that only his eyes could perceive. Their putrid reddish-black gliding along his knuckles only to fall where they'd be reabsorbed back into him. Just like watching from afar wasn't enough, watching up close would soon fail to placate him. He'd want to touch, to grab, to squeeze, to crawl into her skin. He paused his thoughts to watch her prune one of the vining plants, his eyes stuck on the Alabaster white that bled from her gentle digits. He wanted to know what would happen if their hands touched. Would his muck dissolve her colors, crawling along her hands to forever taint her with his sins. Or was her hue potent enough to wash away his own, or at least, force it to retreat somewhere deep inside where he would no longer have to see it. Would they mix to create something new or would they slide right off each other like oil and water- incompatible. Nikto knew the answer, he was a broken man who broke his surroundings to reflect himself. A piece of him here, a piece of him there. A piece of him in the knife he stuck in the enemy's neck, a piece of him in the bullet wounds riddled in his targets. A piece of him in every whore he'd ever paid for and a piece of him in every comrade he'd sever once they got too close. A piece of him in every therapist they'd forced him to see, who would mark him good just to make sure he'd never step foot in their office again. Thankfully, he'd managed to keep his home untouched, no shard of him to be found in it's modest decor.

He watched his neighbor retreat into her home, satisfied with the maintenance she'd done. A contemplative glance over to his side before closing her door. He hardly knows his neighbor, but he knew she did not deserve to have a man like him in her life. She was made for a normal man who would give her a ring and children. Not for a broken soldier clinging to the pieces of his mind, scrambling for the shards that he himself discards. He was subject to his emotions but his actions, his actions would always reflect the meticulous decisions of a well trained soldier...a practiced killer. His brain and it's inhabitants could be as much of a mess as it wanted but he was in control. This was noise, nothing but his mind trying to create chaos and latching onto the first thing it could find. He knew there was nothing to be gained by entertaining this little 'fixation' of his.  He knew. He knew. He knows.

Nikto knows to leave pretty things alone.

"Neighbor, we bring gift." Nikto spoke once she'd opened her door for him, the small bag in his hand containing a Russian tea mix. A gift; a peace offering. "Make up for... Earlier incident."

Adlean stared at him for a moment, her gaze flicking from his eerie blue eyes to the brown paper bag crushed between his scar ridden fingers and back to him. When she saw his familiar silhouette at her screen door, she'd prepared herself for some kind of verbal altercation, despite the fact that he hadn't technically yelled at her the first time. She'd been kicking herself repeatedly these past few days. Annoyed that she'd caused her neighbor trouble due to being impulsive and annoyed at how much anxiety she'd allowed to build in her body because of it. Adlean had spent so many years working to overcome that part of herself that inflated every little issue in her life, but that training went straight into the garbage that lovely Sunday morning he came knocking at her door. It was forgivable, she told herself, he was a big man and with only one barely barricaded door to separate them she was right to worry. Yet she was pissed at herself all the same. That constant irritation had her brows involuntarily knitted together and her eyes narrowed into a look her friend often teased her about, likening her to an angry librarian or a ticked off school teacher. That sour look had permanently plastered itself on her face since and it was what greeted her well meaning, neighbor.

"Maybe not then... " His trailed off, voice somehow sounding more ashen.

It was near impossible to read his face behind a mask but she felt a hint of disappointment. It snapped her out of her foul mood and she quickly fixed her face. "Oh! No, no, I appreciate the gift." She held her hands out for the item. "Thank you."

Adlean forced a smile onto a face that still wanted to scowl. This was great, a sign she hadn't completely messed up her chances. Maybe she could take it a step further. "Would you like to enjoy this tea together? On the veranda out back?" She quickly added the last part, not ready to invite him directly into her home. Generally nerves weren't something she had to battle but the circumstances had her words coming out a little more shaky, her hands a little more fidgety. "In about half an hour, if you're not busy."

The Russian's eyes creased ever so slightly for a brief moment. "Да[yes], yes, that would be... Good."

With another awkward moment of swaying and silent nods the door was eventually closed. Adlean took a moment to inspect the tea with a little smile on her face. Teas have always been the go to gift of people in her life, despite the fact that she actually doesn't like them that much. "I guess I must look the type." she muttered to herself, grateful all the same. She compared the tea he got her to the one she bought to gift to him but couldn't bring herself to knock on his door. Maybe she'd give it to him later, or save it for the next time she overstepped.

A deep sigh made it's way out of her lips. This was good. This was her chance. They didn't need to be best friends, just cordial at the very least. She would accept that much. Anything but enemies, she wouldn't go through that again, never again. With that sentiment echoing through her mind, she went out to sweep the veranda and put the chairs together. 

Nikto had put those thirty minutes to good use, taming his mind and avoiding the questions he asked himself. He would move on impulse. Those impulses had granted him an invitation to her company after all. If she hadn't he might've found some reason or excuse to make his way into her home, testing her boundaries to sate his curiosity. It didn't sit well with him to be so distracted but in the comfort of his own home, he'd allow it for now.

Nikto stepped out into the back yard. Their home had a veranda that span the entirety of the structure's length. There use to be a small fence to separate the sides but Roderick had toppled it over some years ago. Said he'd gotten into a fight at a party he threw and pushed a guy into it. A check of the security cameras confirmed there was a fight but it was his bony ass that got knocked to the ground. Bastard never bothered to replace it. The memory only made Nikto that much more grateful his neighbor was gone. This area wasn't spared from Adlean's questionable decorating choices, though it seemed all the plants here were fake, she'd added many along the railing and wall. Two lanterns above her door hung from fake branches. It wasn't Nikto's style, far too cluttered bordering messy, but it did suit her.

Adlean was already out, smiling with her eyes as he approached. She really did look like an old lady at times; legs crossed and tucked beneath her chair, her large glasses dangling precariously on the tip of her nose, hair up in a neat bun, draped in layers upon layers of knitted fabrics. The outdoor table-chair set was also within the aesthetic of her back yard, possibly custom made, designed to look like branches in the shape of furniture. Nikto was hesitant to sit, while the chair looked large enough for him they still seemed delicate, like they'd snap under the weight of his gaze alone. Adlean assured him it was fine, but it took a while before he could let his guard down and put his full weight on it. On the table, sitting above the green cloth covering it's surface, was the familiar orange color of his tea in a glass pot, two matching cups on either side and sugar packs placed in the middle. Adlean poured his glass before hers and Nikto didn't miss that she waited for him to drink first before taking a sip of her own.

"Thanks for agreeing to this, I really should apologize again for essentially trespassing." She began. There was genuine remorse in her words but despite this she seemed far more content, especially compared to earlier.

"No need, we're not upset. In truth, we just wanted reason to pick fight with neighbor." He paused. "Past neighbor."

"Was he... Problematic?" She asked.

"A problem; he very much was." He made a sound like in the back of his throat, like slate against metal.  "Thorn. Worm. Would come into our yard, just like you, but always with mess. Had annoying dog too. He was always loud, shit music playing at all hours of the night. Made us hate having a neighbor, would've moved if not for fact that we're barely here."

Adlean grimaced. "I know what that's like." She elaborated after Nikto gave her an inquisitive glance. "My last neighbor was great until rumors got out that her husband was having an affair and for some reason she believed it was with me. She started messing with my packages, tampering with food I had delivered and even my mail. Throwing things through my window and I'm pretty sure she released a possum in my home on four different occasions."

"Hm, what did you do in return?"

"Nothing... I just kept trying to talk to her but she wouldn't listen."

"Weak. If Roger ever did such things; I would have his tongue."

She chuckled, enjoying the blunt response. "Yea, well I was pretty weak back then."

"And now?"

"Now, I try not to be." She answered, a smile on her lips anyone could tell was fake.

The conversation drifted away and they spoke as two people new to each other would. Nikto wouldn't say much about himself but she compensated by being open about her life. She went into further detail about the things her old neighbor had done, some of it so bad he developed a slight appreciation for Roderick. She updated him on the surrounding neighbors, not that there was much given the area was just one big retirement home. She also let him know the shyly old woman that owns the house might pass it to her niece.

Nikto watched as she blew on her drink before taking small sips; her eyes lidded as the liquid rippled against her lips. It had to be on purpose, yeah? The way she moved was so slow, so calm. Nikto could damn near count the frames, yet the motions were fluid. Unbothered. She moved like someone with little care for time and how finite it was for us humans.  He envied it. He wanted that calmness, wanted to crawl into the chasm of her mind and set up residence. He made the correct decision getting closer. This must be why he enjoyed watching her so much; she looked like someone who knew peace. Exuded it. Combined with her voice, Nikto barely wanted to talk back, just listen. Just exist. He would never have true peace but when he watches her, his mind slows down just a bit and for a moment he can pretend. That's all it was, yes. She was a sustenance and he was starving.

She opened her eyes fully, lips still resting against the cup, then she turned them to him. Looking away would've been a good choice, to avoid appearing any more creepy than he already feels but he couldn't. He couldn't help but wonder how he looked to her. The Russian had no illusions about his appearance, to be sitting like this having tea in a garden didn't suit a creature like him at all. To any outsider he must look severely out of place; like a dagger among needles or a rock among feathers.

"Let's be good to each other, neighbor." she said in a quiet voice before returning to her tea.

He would. He would be good to her.

[sunisglowing]

Full Moon in Shatabhisha Nakshatra - Pick a Card 👁🌕

(sidereal aquarius)

WHAT IS BEING BROUGHT TO YOUR ATTENTION?

PILE 1

Some of you need to heal your trust issues especially regarding asking for helping or opening giving to others.

Trust issues and the fear of being betrayed is stopping to recieve guidance and it can be the opposite too, to provide guidance.

Some of you might think other people might misuse or take advantage of you for the resources you provide for them. Meanwhile don't forget to be careful where you invest your money and resources.

Some of you should donate to charity or in some kind of support group for the needy.

If you are the one who needs, help is coming your way soon.

You need to open your mind in becoming a student and learning new things. Don't be stubborn or judgemental and block the opportunities coming your way.

Serve your community and provide for the poor. Be careful with the investments you make too.

You might open up new opportunities for others or even for yourself if you give openly. Your resources and knowledge need to flow freely like water. You are putting up a blockage towards.

For some of you, you will be embarking on a new career which is your dream job, or a career related wish might come. Some of you will get the promotion you desire.

Ask yourself are giving or receiving, if you are, is it happening in flow? If you are giving, are you receiving too?? And vice versa.

PILE 2

This full moon will shed light on your insecurities regarding money. Some of you are anxious about if you would do good in your career and making a good amount of money.

You will. You need to have more faith in yourself that you will get the career or the promotion you want. Especially if you have been putting in the work. It will all turn out well.

Some of you have a lot of pressure from family regarding your career. You may feel pressured to choose a certain path or just than you are afraid of disappointing them and not fulfilling their expectations.

You also desire stability in your life, especially in family. You might not have a very stable family environment or life, whether financially (for most of you) or emotionally.

You may be alone at times because of this and you hoard and save a lot. Good thing. You might travel or leave your home soon for your job.

You need to heal your relationship with money. Whether it's overspending or overhoarding.

You might think that career will solve your problems and that might be true to certain extent, but not all problems have the same solution.

You will get your dream job and the stability and security you desire.

PILE 3

I guess what you need to work on is patience. Big dreams require a huge amount of time and patience.

Some of you might be so close to it, it's just few more steps or just one step.

You will see the results in a while. You have been following the rules, doing things the correct way but you still doubt it.

Some of you struggle with keeping up faith in what you worked on. Keep an optimistic attitude. It will work out, don't lose hope.

If some of you have joined an institution, church or a religious practice or ritual, you may also doubt its structure and system.

Maybe there are certain beliefs or strict rules you don't like or agree with. So it's making you doubt your choice of joining it.

Beware of who you share your important documents and money with, especially where you invest.

For others of you, I see that your dreams are unique and require you to move a different way rather than what others usually do.

If you have a business idea, how go about it is the key. You may have to leave something you have been waiting for to proper or bloom, because it is just not working out or results are taking time

Maybe others have relied on you. You were the stable and grounded tree that others would bask on and take the fruits. You are no longer doing that shit.

PILE 4

You have shown a lot of strength and resilience. You have matured a lot. Your patience and compassion will result in someone special coming your life.

You have the qualities that endure when times are tough. You are at a point in life accepting of others and while taking and giving space.

If you don't resonate with this, maybe you should practice these qualities. Compassion for yourself and others.

You've already won by surrendering and giving up control. You are moving to a new phase of your life.

Luck is on your side, don't doubt it.

Follow your passion whether it be a creative field or a subject, and quickly grab the opportunities.

Some of you may have a tendency to just skip what's in your table and grab the next best thing. This way you will be losing everything you could have tried.

Some of you will be planning to travel soon. You will find a new romantic partner there and there will be a lot of mutual understanding and passion between you too.

Some of you have been wishing to move out, get a dream university, dream partner. It will come true.

Especially if you want to relocate, that might happen soon. Just you need to stay hopeful and keep having faith in your dreams.

You will find someone very emotionally understanding and compatible.

Your patience and resilience is being rewarded.

[blasphemous-lies-and-deceit]

It was a lovely day, even by Gerry's standards. The weather was pleasant enough, brisk with the flavor of autumn as leaves drifted from the trees around them. The children at the nearby kid's park weren't screaming too loudly, and his head was resting in the lap of his absolute favorite person in the world. It really couldn't get much better.

So, it didn't make sense to him why Michael had just let out such a melancholy sigh.

"What was that for?" Gerry asked, tilting his head back and squinting up at Michael's face. Dead leaves drifted through his hair as he did, courtesy of Michael's restless fingers collecting them and dropping them onto his head. Michael shook his head, eyes evasive even as his fingers combed through Gerry's hair.

"It's nothing," he sighed. It clearly was something, so Gerry quickly scanned the park, eyes sharp, trying to see if he could figure out what was making his boyfriend sigh like a dejected dog. He hoped it wasn't the kids that were running about and playing, because that wasn't a conversation he was ready to have. There were other happy couples walking along the paths holding hands, but they'd done so themselves before settling under a tree to bask, so it couldn't be that.

On the other side of the park was a group of rowdy uni students playing footie. There were obviously couples within the group, because there was a lot more playful tussling between some of them. As Gerry watched, one of the guys grabbed one of the girls around the waist, hoisting her up as she laughed and kicked her feet in the air. Michael sighed again, and understanding burst in Gerry's brain.

That made sense, in a rather sad way. His Michael was a lanky and lovely individual, but not the sort of person that was easily picked up. Gerry knew he never had, which was a tragedy of the highest order, and something he needed to remedy as soon as he could. 

Not right away, though. He was basking, and didn't want to get up just yet. But he had to stop Michael from making sad noises, so he tangled his fingers in the strands of Michael's scarf, tugging until Michael turned his direction back to him. He was a vision of fall cuteness, wrapped in an orange jumper and red scarf, with leaves in his hair and a flush on his cheeks. Gerry maneuvered himself up as he tugged Michael down, meeting him in the middle for a kiss. It quickly deepened, perhaps too much for a public park, but Gerry didn't give a damn. He had an adorable boyfriend and had to do something about that, and for now, that something was kisses.

"How about some hot cocoa?" he offered when their lips parted. Michael hummed pleasantly, dipping back down for another kiss.

"That sounds just lovely, my love," he sighed, carding his fingers through Gerry's hair to pick out the leaves. Gerry scrambled to his feet, shaking his head to scatter the rest of them, and offered Michael his hands to pull him to his feet. Michael beamed at him as he bounced up, clutching his hands and clearly expecting to keep holding them as they walked to the cafe for drinks.

Instead Gerry dropped his hands, surged forward, wrapped his arms around Michael's middle and hoisted him up into the air.

"Gerry!" Michael shrieked in surprise, flailing before grabbing onto his shoulders, legs latching around his waist for balance. "What are you doing?"

"Giving you a lift," Gerry joked, spinning them around in a circle, leaves crunching under his feet. Michael yelped and burst into giggles, his hair flying all around them as they spun around. Gerry preened and pressed his face into his middle, delighted that he'd guessed Michael's wish correctly. He was more awkward to hold than heavy, so it was almost no issue for Gerry to carry him off. It was absolutely worth it for the delighted giggles coming from Michael, sounding like all his dreams had come true.

When he nearly lost his balance Gerry quickly dropped Michael, supporting him when he nearly stumbled and took them both down. "Did you like that?" Gerry asked, grinning so widely he could feel it. Michael was still giggling, hunched over him, still holding him by the shoulders. His curls were all over the place, and Gerry stroked them back from his face, staring up at his sparkling eyes. "Michael? Love? You with me?" 

"Yes," Michael gasped past his infectious giggles. Gerry was chuckling too, completely caught in Michael's joy. "You are so‒" he cut himself off to pepper Gerry's face with kisses, wild with delight. "I had no idea you could do that!"

"I can do that whenever you want." Gerry wrapped his arms around Michael's waist again and gave him another small lift, just to show he could. Michael squeaked adorably and burst into giggles again. "I'll do whatever you want to make you happy."

"You wonderful person," Michael gushed, kissing him again. "You're in for it now. I'm gonna demand to be carried everywhere from now on."

"If that's what you want‒" Gerry stepped away and turned his back to him, gesturing towards himself. "Hop on, your majesty, your hot cocoa awaits."

He heard Michael giggle again, and then his weight settled on Gerry's back. With a hop and a wiggle, Michael climbed on his back, and Gerry hooked his hands behind his knees, adjusting his stance to accommodate him. It was perfectly manageable, and Michael draped his arms around his shoulders, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"Onward, my beloved steed," he laughed, and Gerry grinned as he took off across the park. There was a very obvious joke he could make, but he could save it until they were home. For now, he had to get some hot cocoa for his lovely boyfriend. 

[sophierequests]

Could I please request a Toyla x reader..? (Bless you for writing for everyone I can’t find any for him 😭) they’re crushing on each other and them having to share a bed 🥺

you are foolish to want

Navigation┃Main Masterlist┃Request

Pairing: Tolya Yul-Bataar x gn!Reader

A/N: After reading this you might ask me: Sophie, will you ever write anything else than Hurt/Comfort when you get requests that aren't in any explicit genre? The answer to that question is: no <3 Also, the second time of using horses in a Tolya fanfic?? What has overcome me?? Thank you for the request! I hope you'll like this, even though the one bed trope isn't the main focus of this story </3

Summary: Tolya and the reader are on their way to the Lazlayon until unforeseen circumstances put a slight dent in their plans.

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff (if you squint)

Word Count: 5.8K (oh god)

Warnings: Mention of almost dying, broken ribs and hurt feelings

The silence between you became louder the longer you indulged in it. It wasn’t really silence, so to say. It was more the state of not speaking. The forest surrounding you was anything but silent. Between the creaking of old rotting larch trees swaying in the wind and the padding of hooves against the more or less solid ground, nothing ever really felt quiet. 

He couldn’t be sure how much longer the path ahead of you could possibly still drag on; all he knew was that he likely wouldn’t be able to stay awake for the entirety of it. The tension of riding next to you alone would have usually been enough to keep him from falling asleep. Hell, the thought of you alone did the job well enough already. Yet something about this time felt different. 

It was just the two of you. No Tamar. No Nikolai. No Zoya. No one else to worry or think about. Just the two of you, wordlessly riding next to each other. 

And while his brain screamed at him to use that factor in his favour, to finally make some sort of move, his body recoiled at the impulse of opening his mouth and articulating his feelings. Whenever he even attempted to do so, an obstruction seemed to form inside his larynx, blocking the feeble sounds that might’ve crossed the breach of his vocal folds. Maybe it was his heart leaping out of his chest and ending up in the enclosure of his throat, desperate to be spat out and stowed away inside a neat little box that he could disregard as long as he pleased. Maybe it was bile at the thought of having to come clean about the months and months of yearning he had been subjected to since meeting you. Maybe both of these options rang true; he couldn’t be sure. The sole thing he was painfully sure of was that it had to be closely related to you. 

Everything was somehow related to you. You had always been everywhere and nowhere; everything and nothing at the same time. At least to him, he hoped. You occupied his mind, his space, and his time whenever he should be focused on anything else. When he wanted, no, needed to focus on anything else. You were everywhere just as much as you were nowhere. Nowhere he could reach. Touch. Hold. You had always been more of an idealistic daydream, rather than something concrete. And just like most dreams, you would be foolish to pursue.

“Do you think we’ll reach the Lazlayon before the night sets in?” Your voice broke through the air like a gunshot, forcing his gaze away from the impenetrable barrier of trees next to him. You stared at him expectantly, waiting until he could will himself to produce a coherent sentence.

He let out a huffed breath, absent-mindedly fiddling with the reins in his hands as if they were a set of tarot cards that would permit him to look into the future. “If we keep up this pace, we’ll likely get there right before sundown.”

“Oh, lovely. Just in time for Count Kirigin to welcome us. I’m sure he’s already buzzing with excitement,” you chuckled dryly, giving your companion a distinctive eye roll to accentuate your annoyance. 

Tolya rolled his shoulders, the mention of the count’s name sending a wave of unease through him. He didn’t necessarily hold any tangible grudges against him, he didn’t know him well enough to form any sort of well-shaped opinion of him to begin with, but what he knew was that the man was an absolute rake. If the countless times of resolute flirting with anyone that didn’t leave his presence on the count of three wasn’t enough to support this hypothesis, Nikolai’s long-winded tales of his drinking and lavished parties sure filled the gaps. Count Kirigin as a whole simply wasn’t a coeval he wanted to be around. Not when he was busy enough with keeping his emotions in check while you were close to him. 

“There’s still hope that he chose to go to bed instead of waiting by the door for us to arrive. I doubt that he’s all too invested in our presence. After all, Zoya isn’t accompanying us, so he won’t have much to ogle at,” the Heartrender objected slyly, using the scarce situation of being alone with you to voice his obvious disdain for the man in question.

“We can only hope.” You clasped your hands together, holding them in front of your chest as if you were in prayer. “At least we’ll share the same fate if it comes down to him having genuinely waited on us.” 

He nodded in agreement. It was a comforting thought to know that he was there with you. The fact that you were meant to take on the journey to the Lazlayon on your own at first disconcerted him greatly. Not that he wouldn’t have trusted you to come back in one piece, however, having you be out of his sight for so long without a possibility of contacting you made him uncomfortably aware of the actual extent of his feelings.

Another wave of silence settled around you. It was more comfortable this time. Especially since it didn’t take too long for you to speak up again. “I’m glad Nikolai decided to have you come along.”

His smile falters for just a split second, the wave of emotion your simple statement had created stripping him of the last bit of feigned confidence he had. Perhaps his years of studying and breaking down ancient poetry had gotten the best of him. Convinced him that there was more to the comment than merely you being glad that someone else had to suffer through the hours on hours of travel. But that’s what you would have said, right? You would have said ‘someone’ instead of explicitly mentioning him. During times like these, he genuinely missed Zoya’s bluntness to bring him back down to earth.

“Oh, uhm, it’s good to know that you don’t see my presence as patronising,” he stammers, his voice hitching and cracking as if he was a puberty-stricken young boy again.

You tilted your head and looked at him with narrowed but gentle eyes. The same eyes that always seemed to magically find his own whenever he had stared at you for a bit too long. “Your presence could never be patronising to me. I like being around you.”

In an ideal world, he would have told you that the feeling was mutual. The sentence would have rolled off his tongue equally as casually as it had off yours, and you both could have continued your travels with the knowledge that you appreciated each other’s company. This was not an ideal world though. In fact, he didn’t even give you a verbal response. Instead, he hastily turned his head away from you, futilely trying to cover the gleaming blush that had spread across his cheeks in a matter of seconds.

Once again, the steady whirring and rustling replaced your short-lived stab at a conversation. It took another hour for the unkempt thicket to gradually turn into a widespread field, stretching out in front of you until it was obscured by the dense artificial fog that hid the watercraft testing grounds of the Gilded Bog. It would have been a stunning view if you hadn’t been aware of the massive amount of work that lay behind it.

A sigh of relief escaped your lips when Count Kirigin’s estate came into view. Your whole body ached after riding for hours on end without a break, making you long for a warm bed and a good night’s sleep. It didn’t take long for Mother Fortuna to knock that idea out of your head though.

Just as you had intended to throw some sort of sarcastic comment in your friend’s direction, a sudden sound of a rifle being fired cut through the forest behind you. After that, everything continued to go downhill horribly fast. 

You barely managed to calm down your horse, yanking the reins to the side to let it spur out its fright by trotting in a circle. Tolya, on the other hand, was less lucky. He hadn’t been able to react quick enough, his horse rearing on its hind legs before he was in the right mindset to properly hold onto the straps of his saddle. He was thrown off its back quite roughly, his back hitting the hard ground with a bone-chilling thud.

“Tolya!” you called, dismounting your horse without thinking about the looming threat of someone directing their gunshots at you. It was as if you were passing through a tunnel, eyes only focused on what was in front of you.

A litany of his name spilt out of your mouth as you knelt down next to him; you repeated it so many times that it didn’t even feel like a real word anymore. But no amount of repetition could bring him to regain consciousness. He remained laying on the ground, perfectly still and with no reaction to anything you did. Years and years of basic medical training flickered through your mind, hopelessly trying to give you an impulse that might be able to save his life. Your hands promptly moved to the pronounced column of his throat, a motion that would have been intimate if you weren’t filled with panic. The skin underneath your fingers was warm - and unexpectedly soft - as you dug for any form of heartbeat. When you finally localised a faint but rhythmic thudding, you sucked in a deep breath, momentarily considering changing your stance on the Saints if they had been the ones to grant you this minuscule act of reassurance.

“Tolya,” you tried again, hands cradling the sides of his face as you shifted him onto your lap. His eyelids fluttered open briefly, immediately seeking out contact with yours. It took another moment for him to recognise what position he was currently in. Your hands on his face and his head on your lap felt almost too good of a situation to be anything but a dream. 

He wanted to say something, anything for that matter, but a piercing pain in his chest caused him to let out a stifled groan. It hurt to move. It hurt to speak. It hurt to breathe. His whole body felt like it had been pulled apart and reassembled without a manual, and you couldn’t do anything to ease his discomfort.

“Hey.” You let your thumbs smooth over the ridges of his cheekbones, your feather-light touch creating an embarrassingly visible trail of goosebumps all over his arms. Everything you did was too soft. Too delicate. Too wholly overwhelming. “I know it hurts. Just stay here for a while and-”

“Saints!” A shrill voice made your head shoot up, the memory of the gunshot striking you like a brick. When a familiar figure scrambled out of the woods, an extravagant hunting rifle strung over his back and a mortified look on his face, you began to piece together what was going on. “I’m terribly sorry! I- We were just coming back from our hunting trip and we didn’t- Oh, no.” The count ran a shaky hand through his neatly slicked-back hair, causing a few stiff strands to fall onto his forehead.

Something inside you wanted to be mad at him. It was his fault after all. If he had been more careful and a little less trigger-happy none of this would have happened. However, Tolya’s weight still very much present on your legs substituted your anger with worry. “Kirigin, I’ll need some help getting him to the Lazlayon. He needs to be looked at by someone more…medically-inclined than me.”

Emil nodded his head reverently, calling over a few of the other men that had joined him in his hunting party. With their help, you heaved him back to his feet. His nails dug into your shoulder as you helped him walk to your horse; neither of you trusted his horse enough to not throw him off again. It was quite the struggle, but after a lot of cursing and griping coming from the normally very composed Heartrender, you reached the opulent mansion just before the sun had vanished behind the mountain range completely.

Upon entering, the count immediately called for a medik, showing the two of you to his drawing room while he flittered through the foyer in a frenzy. Tolya let himself fall onto one of the plush divans with a groan. His hand flew to his side as soon as his back met the fabric underneath him, flinching as he seemed to have pressed down too hard. It was a strange picture to see him look this helpless. He appeared small and vulnerable, almost as if a bare touch could cause him to break and crumble.

“Don’t move,” you requested gently, one of your hands reaching out to take hold of his. He was aware that this gesture was merely meant to give him a piece of reassurance; you wanted to give him something to hold on to, something to get his mind off of the erupting pain in his chest. Still, a nimble twinge of hope sent a burning wave of longing through his body. “I think you may have broken a rib. After your fall earlier that would be one of the lesser evils,” you assessed, letting the fingers of your free hand brush over the clothed expanse of his chest. “We should probably pass a message to Nikolai. You can’t be expected to take on the ride back anytime soon. But all of that can wait until tomorrow.”

The medik arrived just as you closed your mouth, forbidding Tolya from saying anything in response to your short-lived ramblings. He was a bit miffed by the fact that the person treating him was a simple medik instead of an actual Healer that could have fixed him up in the blink of an eye. However, a faint memory of Kuwei accidentally setting a whole section of the laboratory on fire told him that their presence was a bit more required downstairs. 

He was ripped from his thoughts when the medik pushed down on his ribcage with unexpected force. A jolt of pain flashed through him again, and embarrassingly enough, that only caused his grip on your hand to tighten. You didn’t show any sign of discomfort as he did so, entirely concentrated on providing the tiniest bit of comfort you could offer him.

“Fractured rib,” the woman beside you muttered, her brows furrowed as she looked at his exposed chest stomach. “This will take a few weeks to heal on its own. We can send for a Healer as soon as one’s available, but that will probably take just as long. The new project is keeping everyone busy, I’m afraid.”

“I will send a letter to the King,” the Count interjected, rubbing his palms together in an attempt to cope with his nervousness. “The Healers at the Grand Palace are often more willing to make the trip than the ones we have on our hands here. I’m certain he would do everything in his power to ensure that one of his most trusted…guards is back in his service as soon as possible.”

“I suppose that would be for the better.” The medik took out a few differently coloured vials from the pouch on her hip, handing them to you as if the person needing them wasn’t also in the room with you. “These are painkillers. Make sure he takes one of these twice a day.” You nodded along slowly, letting go of Tolya’s hand to not drop any of the flimsy flasks. “It would be best if someone keeps an eye on him for now. Especially after taking the medicine. In case the pain gets worse, you know where to find me.” She directed her gaze at Emil who merely dismissed her with a grateful wave of his hand.

“Thank you for…taking the initiative.” You gave him a brief smile, sitting on the armrest of the sofa where Tolya was still laying. Slowly but surely, the heaviness of the day began seeping through your bones.

“But of course! That’s the least I could do after causing such a mishap.” He pursed his lips but opted to force them into a straight line while he pondered his next words. “I shall send for a servant to mind you during the night if that’s alright with you. Someone should probably be there to attend to you, just in case something happens.” 

Tolya looked up at him, evidently not too fond of his suggestion. The idea of having some stranger even do as much as stay in the same room as he slept didn’t sit right with him at all. “I…appreciate your kindness, Count Kirigin. However, I would prefer it if you refrained from doing anything like that. I’m certain it will be fine if I’m left unsupervised for the night.”

“The count has a point,” you reasoned, a distinct expression of worry present on your face. “You’re hurt; don’t be so blasé about it. It would genuinely be better if someone is there for you. At least for tonight.”

“Maybe you could stay with him for the night if it’s the aspect of familiarity he’s concerned with?” Emil offered, his eyes darting between the two of you nervously. If his upper body had allowed it, Tolya would have shot upright in his seat after hearing that. As much as he hated the notion of having someone else practically babysit him while he was asleep, anyone else would be a better option than you. He wouldn’t survive spending a night under these circumstances.

His suggestion caught you off guard with what felt like brute force. He was a good friend; one of your closest actually. Yet you had never even seen the inside of his bedroom. Spending the night in the same room, no matter under what circumstances, seemed like a terrible way to improve that friendship.

“I… Tolya? Your call.” You shifted all the responsibility of decision-making onto the Heartrender, giving him an apologetic look while he struggled to find the right words.

He mentally considered all the implications this action might entail. What if he snored? What if he talked in his sleep? What if the medicine made him do or say things he might regret? What if nothing out of the ordinary happens and he was just diving into the worst-case scenarios? “If I have to choose, I’d prefer your presence,” he mumbled, instantly clamping his eyes shut in order to avoid looking at your face while you let his words sink in. 

“It’s decided then,” you chirped, slumping off your seat to carefully place the ampoules in your bag. You sounded pretty much unbothered by the prospect of sharing a room for the night. Weren’t you even a little bit uncomfortable with that?  He should be glad that you were taking this situation so well, however, your unexpected nonchalance concerning the topic made every last speck of hope that you could possibly like him back dwindle down to nothing.

“Very well!” Kirigin clasped his hands together with a resounding clap, the jovial nature returning to his face in an instant. “Now, if you’d be so inclined - and able -, please follow me upstairs to the guest bedrooms.”

The guest bedrooms of the count’s estate reminded you of the countless ornate rooms you had seen at the Grand Palace; broad wide rooms with high ceilings and long windows that made them appear more like a makeshift dining hall than an actual bedchamber. Needless to say, the Lazlayon was a bit more bucolic than what you were used to seeing in the capital, but the white walls and the rococo king-size bed definitely opposed every notion of humility one might expect if there was no prior knowledge of Kirigin’s spendthrift way of living.

Neither of you really had enough willpower to change into your nightclothes, so you merely rid yourself of the thick jackets and clunky boots, which you mindlessly tossed on top of your bags. The bedding would be changed in the morning anyway.

It was a terribly awkward scene, the tension practically electrifying the air around you. Tolya sat on the bed, his back perched on the carved headboard while he watched you scurry around the room like a rabbit in front of a rifle. You also seemed to have realised what the offer of staying in the same room for the night might imply; your previous casualness being gone completely.

“Here,” you said, handing him one of the vials the medik had given you earlier. He took the medicine from your hands, eying it with a suspicious expression. In comparison to his hand, the tiny bottle looked like a prop right out of a doll house. The image of comparing your hand to his popped into your mind, but you hastily shooed it away, thinking about how inappropriate that thought was. “Drink. I’ll get you some water to help with the taste in case you need it.” 

Quickly, he downed the viscous medicine, cringing at the sickly-sweet flavour that spread inside his mouth as he swallowed. As soon as the liquid went down his throat, he had to stifle a cough, the taste only getting worse the longer he occupied his mind with it.

You plopped down on the empty spot next to him, cautious to not spill any of the water that you held out for him. When he reached out to take the glass, your hands touched his for a split second, your fingertips barely brushing over his. Still, that simple gesture was enough to make his head spin. Saints, he hated that you had that effect on him.

“Thank you,” he breathed out, not quite knowing what exactly he thanked you for. Thank you for being there for me when I fell off that damned horse? Thank you for holding my hand earlier? Thank you for staying with me tonight? Thank you for getting me that glass of water? He could probably think about at least a hundred things to thank you for off the top of his head.

“How are you feeling?” Your voice sounded just as sweet as the medicine tasted, he thought. He just liked listening to your voice a whole lot better. Were the painkillers already kicking in?

“Better. Sore, but better. I’m dreading thinking about what Nikolai will say once he gets wind of this.” He let his head slump against the wall behind him, his eyes glancing at you furtively as you scanned his body for any sort of unease or pain he might still feel.

“Forget Nikolai. He can survive without you for a bit longer. And Tamar is still there to save his ass when it comes down to it.” You gave him a quick smile, taking his hand to give it a reassuring squeeze before leaving his side again. “The only thing that matters now is that you’re getting better. No matter whether that happens naturally or with the help of a Healer."

“I’d prefer it happening through the help of a Healer,” he muttered under his breath, scowling at the idea of having to spend another six weeks alone in the confines of a bed without being able to follow his usual duties.

“Well, an actual break would do you some good every once in a while. After everything that Nikolai put you through during the last few years, you should be eligible to take off at least a few months without him being allowed to say anything against it.”

“So eager to get rid of me now?”

A sharp snort escaped your mouth as you looked at him, the feigned pout on his lips making him look like a kicked puppy. Sometimes you had the suspicion that Nikolai’s inherent obnoxiousness was rubbing off on him.

“Believe it or not, I still like being around you. Even though you now gave me the added stress factor of having to keep a close eye on you when we’re around horses.” You walked over to one of the cushioned armchairs that decorated the corner of the room, leaning against it without actually sitting in it. “And If I really would be so eager to get rid of you I wouldn’t have agreed to play your nursemaid for the night. Especially not if I had known that I’d have to sleep in one of these forsaken chairs. Kirigin could have at least given us a double room.”

Tolya’s previously playful expression dropped. He had been so hung up on the fact that you’d be with him for the entire night that he had completely neglected to think about the logistics of his request. Had he known that you’d end up sleeping in a chair rather than a bed, he would have answered differently. 

An unwelcome thought clawed its way into his mind; he wanted to strangle it before it could properly manifest. Had he been Nikolai or Tamar he would have immediately sprung into action, offering you his bed, and probably also his heart while he was at it. But he wasn’t like either of them. He wasn’t brash, or romantic, or even socially intelligent. These attributes would be foreign on him, like a coat that was just a bit too big to fit correctly - contorting his actual silhouette to make him look like something he wasn’t.

“Are you okay?” you asked, a worried undertone present as you spoke. He quickly closed his mouth, straightening out his features to appear more collected than he felt before fixing his gaze on you again. You didn’t only sound worried, you also looked the part; eyebrows tightly knitted together while a distinct flash of concern gloomed in your eyes. “Are you still in pain? Should I get-”

“No, it’s- I’m fine, Y/N. I was just thinking…” 

“Care to share with the class?”

Even though everything inside him rebelled against opening his mouth and speaking his mind, his heart moved quicker than his mind could process. “Sleeping in an armchair can’t be comfortable. We could share the bed,” he trailed off, watching as you gawked at him like a fish on land. “If you want to, that is.” He felt the need to add that, even if it was only enough to calm his raging nerves.

“Tolya, you’re hurt. You need the rest more than I do. I can’t possibly do that in good conscience.” The room was filled to the brim with the nervousness exuding off of the two of you. It was almost sad to watch you two stumble over your own words, acting as if you were two little schoolchildren that both had a crush on the other.

Seemingly taking your refusal as a challenge, he awkwardly shuffled towards the edge of the bed, leaving the other side very clearly unoccupied. “Would that be enough space for you?” Your eyes darted from the comfortable-looking bed to the stiff armchair you had originally intended to sleep in. Much to your dismay, the bed did look more inviting than the chair could ever be.

“I really don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” was everything you could muster up to talk yourself out of it. A futile attempt at not giving in to the want clouding your coherent thoughts ever since being in the same room as Tolya.

“You wouldn’t.” You couldn’t. “Trust me, I don’t mind. I couldn’t let you sleep in a bloody chair with a good conscience either.” As if to underline his statement, he patted the empty space next to him.

With an exasperated sigh, you shook off the roots that had metaphorically formed around your ankles and moved to the offered side of the bed. You felt terribly awkward as you slid into bed right next to him. You two had never been this close. Not in this context.

“Thank you,” you whispered, laying flat on your back with your hands folded over your stomach. He mirrored your movement soon after, albeit a bit slower.

He wanted to say something - anything - to relieve some of the tension buzzing between you. But everything he could have said wouldn’t have improved the situation in the slightest. Just like a few hours ago in the woods, the silence was anything but silent.

“You really scared me earlier, do you know that?” you mumbled, breaking through the uncomfortable silence. Again, he thought. “This could have ended with way worse consequences than a fractured rib.”

“I know.” The words were heavy on his tongue, suffocating him. Up until the possibility that worse things could have happened had sounded like an impossible what-if situation to him. But judging by the honest fear in your voice, he really could have suffered a fate way worse than being forced to rest for an uncertain amount of time. The only feeling he could recall after his fall was the dizziness of laying on top of your lap and the intoxicating touch of your hands on his cheeks. He didn’t even think that he genuinely registered the pain in his chest until he felt the impulse to move. “Thankfully, we didn’t have to find out exactly how badly this could have ended.”

“Good. I honestly wouldn’t have known what to do if you hadn’t woken up. What I would do without you.” The last sentence was so unexpected that it almost knocked the air out of his lungs. You had your way of catching him off-guard with your words that was so brutal, but equally as stunning.

“You won’t have to that out either. Not if I can help it.” He wanted to tell you. He wanted to tell you so badly that breathing normally became more and more difficult. But he couldn’t. Not right now. And maybe not ever.

Silence fell over you again. It was such a stark contrast to the chaos raging inside his head that he barely noticed when you turned to lay on your side, facing him. He forced his eyes to close in hopes of at least getting a few full hours of sleep before he was pushed back into a world where it wasn’t normal for you to sleep next to him.

“Tolya?” you whispered, resisting the urge to nudge him. 

“Mhm?” he murmured, eyes still clamped shut.

He heard you shuffling next to him, probably to put a bit of distance between you and him. “I have to tell you something.” You shuffled again, the mattress giving in ever so slightly when you did. You were sitting up now. “This might be a terrible time to do so, but I have to get it off my chest.” That caught his attention enough to look at you again. You sounded so serious.

“Uhm, sure, go for it.” To say that he was concerned would have been an understatement. His whole body tensed, much to the dismay of his fractured ribcage.

“I don’t recall the last time when I was genuinely so afraid of someone I care about not being alright, but what I felt when you didn’t wake up at first was way worse than just being scared. I'm not sure how to tell you this, and I’ve been putting this off for quite some time now. But I don’t just care about you like how I care about the others. I think I'm in love with you." The last words tumbled from your lips in a hurry, so quickly that he almost didn’t comprehend what you were saying. He could have sworn that this was a fever dream. Maybe the medicine had kicked in way stronger than he expected it to. Maybe he was genuinely going mad. Whatever it was, it didn’t feel real.

You realised how badly timed this confession was as soon as you saw the completely befuddled expression that was plastered all over his face. Suddenly, sleeping on the armchair looked way more appealing than the shared bed. You felt like you were trapped in a mass of writhing quicksand, slowly but surely devouring you until there was nothing left to take. This was way more embarrassing than you had imagined.

“I, uhm, this was a mistake.” You felt your cheeks heat up, burning you until you couldn’t take it anymore. You needed to get out of this bed. Preferably also this room. “It would be best if I leave, I’m so sorry. I’ll go downstairs to call fo-” 

Tolya seized your wrist just as you wanted to throw the covers off of you. The rash movement caused him to wince slightly, but he didn’t let go of you. A thousand questions forced their way into his mind, and he could answer none of them. 

“Wait.” He didn’t know what else to say. But he knew that you needed to stay. “Are…are you being sincere?”

“What? Of course? Do you genuinely think I would make a joke out of something like that? Especially in our…current situation?” you questioned, absolutely bewildered that he thought you were joking around.

At this point, his face was beet red. He couldn’t tell where his embarrassment came from. Whether it was the fact that he had been tiptoeing around his feelings for months by now while you felt the same or the fact that he had the genuine audacity to ask you if you were kidding.

“Tolya, I can understand that this makes you uncom-”

“No, no, don’t!” His grip on your wrist tightened as you tried to wriggle yourself out of his grasp. That was his cue to say something. Anything if it made you stay.

“What do you mean?”

“I love you too,” he blurted, maybe a bit too quickly. But the fear of having to watch you leave made his heart act before his brain could.

“You do?”

“Do you genuinely think I would make a joke out of something like that?” He gave you a sheepish smile, his eyes gleaming with adoration. Saints, he really was in love. “I never said anything because I didn’t think you’d feel the same.”

He had intended to let go of your hand, giving you a moment to process what he had just said. You didn’t let him pull away though. Instead, you took his hand in your own, tightly squeezing it before allowing your lips to curl up into a wide smile.

“Sounds like we’re both idiots then.”

“At least we’re idiots in love.”

“But idiots nonetheless," you laughed, your heart thudding even louder when you heard Tolya join you.

Taglist:

Grishaverse fics in general: @yesshewrites1 @dal-light @treasureofmy-heart

Tolya Yul-Bataar: @juneberrie @horny4knives