#- like total shit and i need to decompress. it would basically guarantee i could do that but then i wouldn't have anything left :(

[houseofwolvess]

ughhh i have to leave for an orchestra concert in two hours but i don't want to leave my room

[consumecommentrepeat]

How to survive on tour

Hey y’all. 

For the past 6 months I have been on tour. I don’t need to get into specifics on what tour; but we traveled around the country and it rhymes with Shimderfella. 

So, if you are anything like me before you leave for your first tour, you google everything. Every little nugget of information you can find on what to expect on a tour, you’re finding it. Sadly, the bulk of the information are for regular band kinda tours. Which if you’re a drummer in a rock band, awesome! But if your doing a Theatre tour, not so awesome. Different set of circumstances. 

During my 6 month voyage across the USA and Canada, I compiled a list. A list of what I learned that I want to pass on to you. Your company may do things differently. And this list is going to be very beneficial to crew people. Sorry actors, our buses are completely different as are our schedules. So here goes!

The Bus:

Ah! Your home away from home because if your tour was anything like mine, you wont have many hotel rooms. So cherish the moments when you do. But the bus! The bus is...fun. If you are considerate and get along with your crew members, the bus is gonna be the shit. 

Jump on the bunk assignment train early. They probably give first priority to returning crew members but in case its a free for all, don’t be nice. Ask for a middle bunk!! The top is fine but jumping up to get to your bed can be hard if your drunk or the bus takes a turn at that exact moment. The bottom, well its the bottom. Pros: you can just roll in and out of the bunk. Cons: sometimes they are the smallest of the bunks. 

No number 2s. DON’T POOP in the bus. Don’t even think about pooping! Just keep that sphincter tight until you’re off that bus.

Label your food in the fridge and be considerate regarding space. The fridge is only so big and you gotta share it with 11 other people. 

Keep a bus bag. If you don’t have a hotel room and are showering in the theatre, keep a duffle in the back lounge with clothes to last you until you get a hotel room. Keep your toiletries there, shower shoes and a towel. 

Bunk alley is the quite zone. Don’t even think about talking above a whisper unless your absolutely certain no one is sleeping. 

Respect bus call times. You’re an adult. Get on the bus on time! There is a tight schedule and you don’t want to have everyone mad at you.

How I made my bus bunk suck less:

Mini humidifier: it gets hella dry in that bus.

Plug that can charge multiple things at once

Pillow

Blanket. I would even recommend a heated blanket if you’re like me and get cold all the time. They keep bunk alley at a cool 60 degrees. Your gonna freeze your ass off if you are the type of person who gets cold easily.

Slippers

Small shower caddy that can suction to the wall. It can hold your glasses, mini humidifier, and phone. 

How to pack for tour: 

Look at your tour schedule. Pack for the cold and hot if need be. We went from Milwaukee in early November to Dallas before thanksgiving. I needed my winter coat in one and not in the other. So pack accordingly. 

Limit your shoe options. I promise you, you wont need a lot of shoes. I got away with two pairs. My docs were my all the time shoes and a pair of sneakers for the gym or when my feet needed a break from the docs. 

Pack more socks and underwear than you think you need. 

Pack clothes that work for multiple things. The only pants I packed were black workout leggings that I wore to the gym and to work the show. I basically only rocked the atheleisure look. 

Pack one nice outfit if your tour lands on a holiday and the company is gonna do something nice for you. And for closing night parties, companies go all out for closing night parties so dress nice. 

A nice towel for the times when you have to shower in the theatre. And write your name on it. If your wardrobe department has a bus towel bag you don’t want anyone else using it! 

 How to save the environment:

Pack tupperware. You can end up with a lot of leftovers if you’re like me and don’t eat your load out meal that night. But hey, its lunch the next day! 

Reusable silverware

Travel coffee mug and water bottle, obviously!

Don’t get your hotel room cleaned all the time. Or at least don’t get your sheets and towel changed every time if you do. 

My bus had a Keurig machine. I would use the k-cups from hotel rooms but for the most part, I bought a reusable one from walmart and a bag of coffee and used that. 

Take hotel soaps and encourage your crew and actors to do the same. When you have enough and are in a city for longer than 2 days, find a shelter and donate them. 

How to save money: 

Find ways to cook. Go half on a instant pot with someone and use that to cook. I made rice in my hotel room and in the wardrobe room at work. 

Stay out of the mall

Go grocery shopping. Eating out for every meal adds up. 

Eat the free breakfast at hotels if you’re in one and they have one

Cut back on your drinking. Or buy the beer at a supermarket instead of going out to the bar every night. 

Look at the buyout options and if its cheaper to book your own travel to and from layoff, do that! I made like 200 bucks taking the bus home rather than the flight they would have booked me on and it was only a 2 hour drive. 

Buy detergent pods and dryer sheets. Most venues let you do your laundry if your crew. If your an actor, make nice with your wardrobe people and they’ll make nice with you. Not a guarantee but we let actors do their laundry at the venue if they were desperate and bought us wine. 

As much as you like grub hub, Uber eats, or whatever, don’t do it. Save it for the times when you’re in the middle of nowhere or just got back from layoff and they haven’t done a grocery store run yet.

Stay sane on tour: 

Find your own thing. I made it a priority to go to every art museum in every town we were in if time allowed.

Be by yourself so you’re not with your crew every day. You’ll get on each other’s nerves that way. 

Branch out and hang with other people. Other departments, musicians, actors, they are fun too. 

Learn to say no to nights out and do some self care in your hotel room.

Sleep at a reasonable time. Especially if you have an early call the next day. No point in staying up drinking till 3am if you have to be at work at 6 the next morning. No one wants to hear you bitch about how tired you are when you did it to yourself. 

Stay Healthy:

Hotel gyms. An hour a day does help. 

Cut back on drinking, especially beer. 

Eat healthy when you can. Even if the only option is fast food. You can still get a salad from McDonalds. 

Eat a large meal before the show so your less likely to eat afterwards and then you’re going to sleep after a heavy meal. 

Drink lots of water. 

Get a flu shot before you leave.

I threw a lot in there and I’m sorry. I totally made it seem like its gonna suck. Part of it will. But its also gonna be a lot of fun! Find ways to make it fun for you. 

We found so many fun things to do. Escape rooms, axe throwing, arcade bars. You’ll find someone who likes that kind of stuff too and you can enjoy doing them with your new friends.  And even though I said don’t drink like twice up there, doesn’t mean you cant enjoy a cocktail every now and then. Sometimes you need to decompress over a cocktail. Just be conscious of the cost and the frequency. 

So the part that is guaranteed to suck: ONE NIGHTERS! How do you make them suck less? Sometimes you can’t. You’re stuck in a shitty one nighter but here’s how to make them suck less:

Buddy up with an actor. If their hotel is close by and your load out is done before you have to leave for the next city, you can walk to their hotel and shower in their room. Beats showering in the theatre, if there is even a shower in the theatre. 

Think about food options. Pack for lunch and preshow dinner because you might be in the middle of nowhere and there are no options. 

No matter how shitty the venue or how tired you are, don’t take it out on your crew. They could be the shittiest people ever but don’t take it out on them. Word spreads and you could get in trouble with your company or they just are gonna suck even more because you yelled at them. 

Take what you can! 

Some venues provide a really good craft service spread. Take what you can. I’ve gotten so much butter, bagels, coffee creamers, OJ. Pretty much anything that could be eaten and would most likely be thrown away by the venue at the end of the night, I took. My crew made fun of me for basically leaving venues with groceries, but that stuff went a long way. I ate for free a lot because I took food.