#(she was off leash. she didn't leave the yard and was just taking a quick lap 😭)

[gender-critical-analytical]

I live in a tightly packed area and sometimes, because there's a pond that sits right up against my and my neighbor's property, random men (and women, but I only mind when it's men) decide to plop down in my yard and start fishing for the bluegill. I'm still working on my confrontation skills (a combination of intense female socialization, liberal midwestern 'mind your own business and look the other way' mindset, and autism that makes it a struggle to look people in the face during even the most normal of occasions) but I have recently found that bringing my dog outside on her leash and letting her bark and growl at them while frantically tugging on the leash to get to them does a great job of making them suddenly, conveniently, want to move a few yards down, and I don't have to say a word during it. In fact, staring silently at them makes it work even better!

[slothspaghettiwrites]

Sheriff Daddy Headcanons no one asked for

Lee Adopts Stray Dogs

After the shit with the Russell kid when he was a deputy, Lee starts noticing dogs more. He starts seeing them in people's yard,

In the street.

He never wants to see another dog suffer, never wants to see what happened to the Russell kids dog happen to another animal.

So he just started picking up strays cause he lives alone in that stupid house in Brewer Heights he bought for his whore ex wife (I said what I said). It feels empty all by himself.

The first dog is older, she doesn't get to stay with Lee long, but he pampers her until she crosses the rainbow bridge. She really liked to snuggle up with Lee when he watched the evening news. He didn't care about the hair on the couch. His old lady liked to cuddle, so they did.

The second and third overlapped a little. They get along well and Lee is happy they've got a friend in each other while he had to work. He loved coming home to the taping feet on the floor. He didn't even mind when the younger one ate his hat that one time. He just loved coming home to someone that loved him so unconditionally and were sad to see him leave.

This need to save, be the saviour for these innocent pups, is how he meets you.

He ate dinner out again, trying to avoid the empty house. He'd been thinking, lost in thought really, about going down to the pound to get a new friend, but then he hears a fight on the walk back to the station.

He's off duty. He didn't really want to have break up an arguement between a few drunks, but then there was a scream.

His flash light clicked on at the end of the alley and he felt his blood boil. You were defending a large dog from a group of boys.

They scatter when when they see him and he can't help but chuckle when you holler at them to get back here.

"Ma'am is this your dog?" Lee looked down at agressive looking animal cowering behind you, feeling his heartstrings being pulled.

The poor thing looks terrifed.

Your stuttering, hesitant answer tells him it ain't yours, but you'd rather lie than risk the poor thing being taken to the pound.

"C'mon, I got a spare leash in the cruiser. I can take her home."

So Lee has a new dog, and he figures out real quick she's got a lot of trust issues. She takes a long time to warm up to him. It doesn't help that you keep coming to his house to check on her.

You call her Maple because she's so sweet. But only for you.

Lee gets used to your weekend visits and occasionally evening pit stops. It brightens both his and Maple's day.

He also could get used to you bringing around hot dinners and bake goods.

"Darlin', don't you have anything better to do?" He asked once around a bite of pie. Maple was staring up at him, begging and drooling all over the kitchen floor. He smiles down at her and dabs the tiniest bit of Cool Whip on her nose for a treat.

You just smile a bit bashful and say no.

Then one night something happens to Maple and Lee can't figure out what. He doesn't know what to do, so he calls you.

And you rush over, barely dressed and freaking out. What had he done to Maple?

But then you see her and you know what's going on. Maple is having puppies.

Lee and you stay up all night with her. She gives birth to TEN puppies.

And when they are cleaned up, and Maple seems content, you fall into Lee, exhausted. He slings an arm over your shoulder and you snuggle up more to him.

"You better get used to me being here," you yawn. "We're parents now."

And yeah, Lee could get used to you being around all the time.