#(probably not someone you know. small account on here. don't bother trying to figure out who)

[lesbianchemicalplant]

unrelated to the deranged transmisogynists mentioned previously (not even adjacent to the same crowd afaik)—

a little while ago I blocked a trans woman mutual who reblogs a lot of nice art because she started using increasingly edgy terms like “consoomoid” and “coomer” and then even “pornsick”, and I ultimately got the impression that if she saw my post about making an adult sideblog she would immediately deem me an Individualist Slop-Eating Consoomoid Cumbrain

[mysecretlittlelibrary]

Call Me Mrs. Rogers

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 8.7k

Warnings: not many, very brief mentions of death and some minor violence- this story is mostly just sassy arguing tbh

Genre: fluff

Summary: You have never gotten along with one Steve Rogers, at this point the rest of the team considers it a win if you two don't speak to each other for an entire day, at least then you aren't fighting. So when a briefing meeting results in you getting paired on an extended mission with him you are less than thrilled. It won't be easy but you're determined to get through it and who knows what'll happen.

***

You check your watch as you walk down the halls of the Avengers tower heading towards the meeting room. When you push open the door everyone turns to look at you.

"Y/n. So nice of you to join us." Steve snarks at you from the front of the room.

"Oh I'm sorry were you waiting for me? I would've taken longer if I knew." You say lazily as you plop into a seat next to Wanda who has to hide her snicker at your words. Steve rolls his eyes at you but doesn't bother trying to retort. Your relationship with him always been somewhat contentious. You assume it's because he's a square.

"Now that everyone's here we can get started." Steve says passing out the briefing folders. You flip yours open and scan the words quickly as he begins talking.

"Alright, here's the situation; this is our target, Dusan Müller. Hydra scientist. Our sources say he's been hiding in a small town somewhere outside of central Italy." Steve explains.

"That's very nonspecific." You scoff.

"We've narrowed it down to one of five we simply need to check them out and find him and assuming he has help we need to do it without raising suspicion."

"So, espionage? Someone's going undercover?" Nat asks.

"That's the plan." He nods.

"Who's going and what's their cover?" Bucky asks.

"Based on some research we've done the most solid undercover would probably be a newlywed couple." Tony says.

"Wait what?" Wanda frowns.

"A few of the towns are travel hotspots for 'unconventional honeymoons'. A new couple touring Europe is least likely to raise questions. At the very least it'll take a while before anyone realizes the truth." He explains.

"Sooooo who are our newlyweds?" Nat prompts again.

"That's what we're going to figure out now." Steve says.

"You haven't decided yet?" You frown.

"There are a lot of factors. A discussion makes the most sense so we can account for as many as possible." He forces out through clenched teeth.

"Well y/n and I have tons of espionage experience." Nat says.

"We could always go together." You wink at her.

"And Steve's one of the strongest fighters." Wanda says.

"He's a lanky scientist will we need brute strength really?" You ask.

"Again we don't know who is helping so if he's not isolateable we might." Tony says.

"Well if we're listing them off Bucky's a pretty strong choice for top fighters too." You point out.

"Anyone helping a Hydra scientist would for sure notice me though, plus with the metal arm I might- draw more attention, because jackets in the middle of summer on a honeymood would be weird." Bucky explains shaking his head.

"I'd go but the whole billionaire playboy thing I wouldn't wanna risk being recognized." Tony shrugs.

"Where are Bruce and Clint? Are they not available for this mission?" Wanda asks suddenly.

"They are not. Other tasks are occupying their time." Tony tells her. "If you ask me I suggest Rogers and y/n go." He adds.

"Fuck off Stark." You roll your eyes.

"Actually based on my calculations the most favorable pairing for this mission is Captain Steve Rogers and Miss Y/n Y/l/n." Vision says. It's the first thing he's said the whole meeting, you'd almost forgotten he was in the room.

"What?" You scoff.

"No." Steve says at the same time.

"Vis, you might want to recalculate that one because the only thing we are most favorable for is driving each other crazy." You cross your arms.

"Miss Romanova is the only other member of the team as skilled in this area as you y/n, however, the chances of her being recognized are higher as you fight with a mask and she does not. Similarly, as Mr. Barnes has explained, his reputation as the Winter Soldier proceeds him, and it is an unnecessary risk to send him. Mr. Stark also has quite the reputation and I am a synthezoid that would also draw attention, leaving Captain Rogers the least conspicuous partner for you."

"And Wanda or Sam?" You ask.

"It is my understanding that Sam will be indisposed during part of the proposed timeframe and Wanda lacks proficiency in the skillset needed to successfully pull this off. It would be nothing short of foolish to test her undercover capabilities with such a high-stakes mission." Vision says.

"Fine." You relent. "I'll go undercover with Rogers if you insist it is the most advantageous option." You grumble.

"I can't believe this is happening." Steve shakes his head.

"When do we leave?" You ask.

"Tomorrow at noon."

"Feels a little short noticed for an extended mission don't you think?" You frown.

"I'm sorry will that be an inconvenience to your schedule?" The question is dripping with sarcasm.

"It's got fuck all to do with my schedule and everything to do with the protocol that this doesn't follow."

"What do you know about protocol?" Steve scoffs. You stand up sharply.

"First of all I've been going on missions for longer than you've been active in the 21st century secondly I've been on this team long enough to know there are protocols we follow for these things."

"Extenuating circumstances required us  to work around protocol because we can't waste time."

"And that's all you had to say but instead you wanted to be petty and make me seem like a spoiled brat because I asked a valid question! Maybe nobody else will bother because it's not their mission but since I have to leave I sure as hell will question things as necessary."

"Or don't. You have your directives. You could try just following them."

"You would do well to remember, Captain, I am not one of your little soldiers. Around here we don't just blindly follow orders. I've watched that shit get people killed too many times."

"Alright let's all just calm-"

"I will see you on the launch pad tomorrow at noon. If you need me before then, don't." You cut off whatever Sam was going to say. You grab your briefing folder and storm out of the room angrily. It's not long after that Wanda and Natasha come into your room where you're shoving clothes into your duffle bag angrily.

"So, how do you plan to play husband and wife with someone that makes you want to commit a crime every time he speaks?"

"I'm gonna act. As if my life depends on it. Because it kinda does." You sigh. "Look I'm going to do my job and I will do it well, personal feelings aside. What do you even pack for a fake honeymoon in Europe?"

"Lingerie."

"Natasha!" You glare at her.

"Not for use, but if somebody ends up in your bags you want it to look like you're on honeymoon with a man you love, so a couple pairs of cute underwear couldn't hurt." She explains with a shrug.

"Honestly I think you should try to make a connection with him on some level. Find common ground to make this mission easier on you both. It would be good for the team in the future as well." Wanda says.

"No thank you." You shake your head.

"Wanda you're a genius I'm texting Sam." Natasha says.

"No. Why would you do that?" You frown.

"He's friends with Steve, maybe he'll have some insight on how to keep you from killing each other before you return." Natasha says.

"Dude I'm just trying to pack!" You huff.

"And we're trying to make sure any injuries sustained on this mission are not a result of infighting." She shrugs.

"I would never jeopardize a mission that way and you know that Nat." You point at her. Your door swings open again and Sam comes strolling in with Bucky in tow.

"Alright what're the girls gettin up to?" He asks.

"That took you a concerningly short amount of time to get here." You mutter.

"I brought Bucky too." Sam says.

"Why?"

"Well I figured this was gonna have to do with Steve and since he's the certified record-holding pal of our captain- couldn't hurt to have his input." Sam shrugs.

"I am just trying to pack and these two are in here chatting away. So join the party I guess." You mutter tossing more things on your bed.

"How long do you think you two will be gone?" Wanda asks.

"Hopefully no more than a week, but I'll pack enough for a couple days longer than that. Plus I know how to wash my clothes." You shrug.

"Anyway! Guys, we think y/n could benefit from finding some common ground with Steve and who better to ask than his boys!" Natasha explains to them.

"'We' being her and Wanda I have no interest in any of this actually." You clarify.

"Steve is- not a complex man." Bucky shrugs.

"No not complex just exasperating." You roll your eyes.

"Is there- a particular reason why you hate him so much?" Sam asks with a smirk.

"I don't hate him-"

"EURIKA!" He gasps and you shoot a confused look at him.

"You don't hate him?" Bucky hums.

"If I hated him nothing Vision said in that meeting room would convince me to do this mission. I don't even know if I'd be on the team with him if I felt that strongly about him." You explain. "Rogers is just such a stiff. He sees the world in a specific way and expects most things to adhere to that worldview. When they don't he gets naggy. It's aggravating."

"So, just to clarify; you do not hate him." Sam says.

"No. I don't. He's just boring and we don't get along because I don't like boring people and the way he talks to me is fucking rude. As if it's my fault that he's insipid." You scoff.

"Honestly that- feels like a start." Bucky nods.

"A start for what, exactly? I'm not the problem. We can't find common ground if he's not willing to lighten up."

"I mean if you're together for an entire week he can't be stuffy the entire time, right?" Sam shrugs.

"I don't care if he's stuffy the whole time. It's not a vacation. We don't need to have fun being a fake couple." You say.

"Honestly I think this mission will be good for your relationship with Steve. We're all on a team it's not good for you to fight with him all the time." Wanda says.

"This is feeling oddly intervention-like. Save it y'all, I just want to do my job and bring in this hydra creep." You say.

"It's not meant to be interventional, we just want to make this easier for you." She sighs.

"I don't really need it to be easier but I appreciate the attempt. Sammy, Bucky go about your business please and thank you." You sigh folding the last of your clothes and shoving them in your large travel duffle.

"Good luck this week lady." Bucky nudges you before tugging Sam out of your room.

"Are you kicking us out too?" Natasha smirks.

"At this point I should, but you don't listen anyway." You roll your eyes. You toss your travel toiletries bag into the duffle and couple of other travel essentials, a book, your mission suit, and some extra combat equipment, things of that nature and by the time you're done packing you, Wanda, and Nat have made plans for dinner later in the evening.

~*~*~

When you wake up the next morning you put on a sundress, chosen by Wanda who insisted if you were going to convince anyone you're on a honeymoon you need to look like you would on a date. After a nice breakfast, you grab your duffle from your room and stroll out to the helipad where Steve is already waiting with his arms crossed.

"You're late." Steve grunts as you approach.

"No I'm not. You said we leave at noon. It's noon now."

"We leave at noon means get here before."

"I told you I'd meet you here at noon. You can complain about the semantics of my arrival all you want but you're wasting the time you're so upset about me not adhering to." You say walking past him to get into the quinjet taking you into Europe. Steve stomps onto the jet behind you joining you at the front of the jet. You try not to laugh at the deep frown on his face as he prepares you for takeoff.

"We'll land in Italy where a truck is loaded up for us to take the rest of the way to our first town, and we'll be using the truck to get from town to town." Steve tells you.

"Yeah sure." You mutter grabbing your briefing file to read over again. You always read the information more than once to find anything valuable.

"Did you not- read the whole file yet?" He glances in your direction.

"Of course I did. I'm rereading. We've got like six hours to kill on this jet." You roll your eyes. You feel his gaze on you as you read but you ignore it and eventually he turns his attention back to the controls of the jet. It's in autopilot now but you're sure he'll spend the entire flight glaring at the instruments to make sure nothing goes wrong.

Once you land, you shove the folder into the bottom of your duffle and sling the bag over your shoulder beating Steve to the three agents meeting you at the landing site.

"Hello miss y/l/n." One of them nods to you.

"Hi y'all." You smile at her.

"This will be your transportation for the duration of your trip. There are supplies and gear tucked under the backseat and a radio to contact us if necessary in the center console and your passports are in the glove box." The same agent details to you, pointing to a silver fiat pickup truck. When Steve joins you one of the other agents tosses him the keys.

"We're good to go?" Steve asks the first agent.

"All set, like I was telling miss y/l/n there's emergency supplies and a radio stashed in the vehicle and your destinations are programmed into the GPS system." She nods.

"Is that such a good idea?" You ask with a frown.

"The truck is Stark tech it only says fiat to blend in because they're common in Italy but, nobody's gonna be able to track you with it, or even plot your route. It's biometrically activated." She explains.

"That's better." You nod. You throw your bag into the back of the truck and climb into the passenger seat. You grab your passport out of the glovebox the name on it says Alissa Rogers and Steve's says Grant.

"We'll be in touch." Steve nods one last time before loading his stuff in and settling into the driver's side. He pulls off quickly and you watch as the scenery changes the further you drive towards the small town you'll be staying in.

"Hope you brushed up on your Italian. You're less likely to find English speakers in the countryside like this." You say opening a snack you'd brought along in case you got hungry before you could get food.

"Tony assured me the place he booked was tourist friendly." Steve mumbles.

"I mean sure but what if you have to talk to the locals? Or will that be up to me?"

"As if you speak Italian." He scoffs.

"I speak several languages actually. Side effect of being trained to be an international spy." You shrug and Steve doesn't have a rebuttal for that so he focuses on driving and you munch away on your snacks. A short while later you make it to the small inn you'll be staying at. It's cozy looking, exactly what you'd expect for the town you drove into. It looks like the kind of place where most of the people know each other. With your bag tossed across your back, you follow Steve into the inn where he grabs the attention of the woman at the desk.

"Excuse me, hi we're looking to check in. We have a reservation. Should be under Rogers, first name Grant." Steve says smoothly with a charming smile.

"Oh yes you booked a honeymoon package!" The woman gushes happily as she types away at her keyboard. You have to refrain from reacting when she says that. Looks like it's showtime.

"Yeah we just got married, we're traveling through Europe for our honeymoon." You tell her with a fake dreamy look on your face. You even wrap your hands around Steve's arm affectionately.

"Oooo traveling through Europe! Sounds so exciting and romantic." The woman beams.

"It has been so far! We're still very early into our plans but, so far it's been everything I've dreamed of and more." You sigh softly. The woman lets out a barely there squeal about how cute you are and how lovely newlyweds tend to be before sliding your room keys onto the desk.

"Here are your keys cara mia! Try to rest if he allows." She winks at you and you laugh although the innuendo in her statement makes Steve stiffen beside you.

"Grazie! Oh! Do you have any food suggestions, we've been driving for a while to get here." You ask her.

"Ah most people cook around here but there's Nino's! It's the best place nearby. I'll give you the address." She quickly scribbles the address onto some spare paper she has at the desk and hands it to you.

"Thanks so much, ma'am. Have a good night." Steve finally finds his voice to bid the kind nonna farewell before leading you off with a hand at your back.

"Oh what a sweet old lady." You smile as you walk up the stairs to find your room.

"You settled into the lovestruck newlywed thing very quick." Steve observes.

"Well yeah, this isn't my first rodeo and honestly hopelessly in love is not even close to the hardest part I've had to play on a mission." You scoff.

"Clearly, you're very good at this."

"Yeah that's probably why Vision thought I'd be best for the job." You shrug unlocking your room and tossing your bag to the side.

"There's- only one bed." Steve points out with wide eyes.

"Of course there is. We're supposed to be a newlywed couple on our honeymoon, why would we have a room with two beds?"

"Well I can call down for extra blankets and set up on the floor or-"

"Don't be ridiculous. If you want to sleep in the bed it's king sized, I'm sure we can manage to share." You scoff.

"I just figured it'd be easier if we-"

"It's not a big deal to me Rogers, the main thing is if someone like came to the door and saw pillows and blankets set up on the floor it would hurt the hopelessly devoted story we're trying to sell."

"Hopelessly devoted?" He frowns.

"It's a song from Grease, an old 70s movie. Don't worry about it. Point is, it'll be odd if anyone sees you set up on the floor. Unless you prefer sleeping on straight wood." You shrug.

"I don't." He frowns.

"So don't make it a thing. Which by the way, you kept Rogers for this mission?"

"Yeah, Tony figured it was common enough that it wouldn't matter. Grant's my middle name."

"Hm, interesting. Well, I'm Alissa, apparently. Should we check out that restaurant the nonna suggested?"

"You feel like going to dinner?"

"I mean she said most folks around here cook so tomorrow I'll hit some of the street stands and you can try asking around subtly for any information on our target."

"Shouldn't you do the asking around? I mean what happens when I end up talking to someone that doesn't speak English?"

"You can introduce them to your gorgeous Italian speaking wife, or hope they have nothing important to say." You shrug. "I think you can handle it. You coming with me to get something to eat or not dude?"

"Uh yeah I guess."

The two of you have a semi awkward dinner playing the happy in love couple for anyone that walks pass while not really talking to each other. When you return to your room you take turns showering and getting ready for bed without saying a word to each other.

"Do you care what side you sleep on?" Steve eventually asks.

"Not particularly."

"Then I will take the side by the door. If that's okay?" Steve suggests. 

"If that's what you want. Sure." You shrug tossing the comforter back and getting under it on your designated side. Why he's acting so awkward about the whole thing makes no sense to you but honestly most of his actions make no sense to you. Curled up on one side of the bed you quickly fall asleep, all the travel has certainly tired you out.

Light peaking through the curtain slowly pulls you from sleep in the morning. As you gain consciousness you get more aware of a weight across your body. A weight that doesn't move even as you shift in bed. It's an arm, attached to a body, that's apparently close enough that you can feel the heat radiating from it and the realization makes you scramble out of bed so suddenly you wake Steve too.

"You don't strike me as a cuddly sleeper Rogers." You clip. You can see in his eyes that he's struggling for a response but you grab your duffle and rush into the bathroom before he can find one. You get yourself together and leave pretty quickly with a comment to Steve about making sure he does what you agreed on when he gets on with his day.

With a tote in hand, you scan the different stands in town stopping to buy various produce and things. By the time you'd settled in yesterday and doubled back out for dinner most of the town had gone quiet, it's nice to see everyone out now and survey things. When you're looking at some bracelets at one shop, you overhear a conversation between the woman behind the counter and someone sitting off to the side near her. They're speaking in Italian but you clearly catch one of them gushing about the increase in handsome foreigners in their small town. You giggle a bit, loud enough for them to notice.

"Excuse me, I don't mean to interject." You smile apologetically, speaking to them in Italian. "I just caught the last bit of your conversation and well, I take it you've met my husband is all."

"The American is your husband?" One of them gasps.

"Yes he is. Was he here?" You ask her.

"Briefly, he said he was looking for 'trinkets' for friends." The one behind the counter says to you. She says trinkets in English with a confused scrunch of her nose.

"Sounds like him. Do you see a lot of Americans here?" You ask.

"No not Americans often. There was a really handsome German here a couple of days ago." She shakes her head.

"German? Really?" You blink.

"Oh yeah, I remember him. He was tall and thin with a beard and big round glasses and his eyes were bright, almost yellow." The seated woman says.

"Yeah! He didn't talk much but he was much friendlier by the time he left and he spoke with a heavy accent." The lady behind the register adds.

"Was he here long?"

"Probably around 3 weeks." The woman at the register says.

"Did he say where he was going?"

"Well he asked me where the next town to us was, even had me point it out on a map." She tells you.

"Interesting. Must be nice to see new faces sometimes. I'll take these two bracelets." You say placing two items on the counter. With all that chatting you definitely need to buy something before leaving, plus they're so cute you're sure Wanda will love them. The woman checks you out and after a bit more looking around, you head back to your hotel. There's a kitchen on the main floor that you can use to prepare food since that's the norm, plus with this information you'll probably be on your way in the morning. When you return to your room, Steve isn't there, which is fine, you take advantage of the empty suite to take a long hot shower. Eventually you step out and put on lotion before stepping out into the room to grab your clothes.

"You take incredibly long showers." Steve's voice makes you jump as you notice him at the desk in the corner.

"Holy fucking hell." You hiss clutching your chest.

"Forgot you shared this room?"

"No, you weren't here when I got back, hence the long shower, and I didn't realize you were back." You huff, using your towel as a cover you pull on your underwear and shorts. Steve's head is focused on whatever he's reading over at the desk so you let the towel drop to put on your sleep shirt with your back to him.

"You should really pay better attention to your surroundings." Steve mutters.

"Fuck off." You scoff.

"I'm just saying you should totally have noticed I was in here before I spoke."

"Who cares man? Did you find anything interesting out today?"

"Not much, I talked to some guys about visitors but none of them had a lot to say, just that sometimes they come."

"Well I heard a German man was here for around three weeks before asking for directions to the next town over."

"Really? Where did you hear that?"

"Some women in a jewelry store."

"And you think this is legit?"

"I mean it's just street gossip so I don't have a way to verify really but it's definitely a promising lead."

"You're sure it's the right man? I mean 'a German' doesn't exactly scream Müller was here."

"Well I couldn't slap a photo in front of them and ask for clarification but they described him as tall and thin with a beard and big round glasses and bright 'almost yellow' eyes. I dunno I'd say that's a pretty close match if you ask me."

"You found information pretty quickly."

"There are very few things that transcend language, borders, gender et cetera, one of them is that people like to gossip. You find the right people and ask the right questions they will tell you any and everything."

"Then we need to move."

"In the morning."

"Why would we not move now? We have a lead we shouldn't let it go cold."

"If the women from the shop were telling the truth chances are he'll be there a couple weeks before we have to worry about him moving. I think we can afford to start fresh in the morning. Plus we don't have a plan. If we move now it's impulsive and foolish."

"We have a plan, find this guy and apprehend him."

"That's not a plan that's an objective. How do we find him Rogers? And how do we move when we do find him? Are you implying we just tackle him in the middle of town if that's where we see him? I mean even a half-baked skeleton of an idea is better than absolutely nothing." You roll your eyes.

"Do you have a plan you'd like to propose?" He glares at you.

"No, that's why I'm saying we wait til morning. So we have time to come up with one. He's probably going to be there for a couple weeks, we have 8 hours to spare."

"You don't know that."

"Obviously I don't, but he doesn't know we're looking for him he has no reason to rush out of there. If he was here for 3 weeks why would he leave there in 2 days?"

"Fine! We will leave tomorrow morning. Bright and early. 8am."

"Yes sir, drill sergeant." You say with a mock salute. "I'm going to make food downstairs, would you like some?"

"Trying to poison me?"

"If I were, you wouldn't know until it was too late." You smile.

"In that case, I'll pass."

"Suit yourself. If you wanna make yourself something, there are more groceries." You shrug grabbing a few things you need before leaving the room. You make yourself dinner and sit in the lobby to eat, chatting with the woman at the desk, it's the same nonna who checked you in so you offer her some food while you talk. Eventually, you head back up to your room where Steve is still hunched over the desk.

"Okay. So when we get there tomorrow we need to focus on finding him while keeping a low profile so we can figure out the most effective way to apprehend him." Steve says.

"Do we have an extraction plan?"

"I mean I've thought of a couple ways to go about it, if he's in a lodging situation, like this one, we should try for stealth. Moving at night would be the safest choice, to minimize the likelihood of civilian endangerment. If he's staying somewhere alone, apprehension isn't super important, if he's staying somewhere with someone I'd say again stealth is-"

"That's fine I guess but not at all what I meant. Do we have a plan for getting us and him back to the US? Because this was expected to take at least a week and at this rate, we'll be ready to move in like half that time."

"I... will contact the team when we're on the road in the morning and we'll plan our apprehending around how quickly they can mobilize." Steve says.

"Good." You say crawling into bed with a book. You put on music and read quietly while Steve does, who knows what at the desk. He eventually gets up and shuffles into the bathroom. You hear the shower running for a while before he comes out in shorts, using a towel to dry his hair. You barely glance up from your novel as he pads around the room. You don't speak with Steve for the rest of the night. You read, and he does whatever he does until you both eventually turn in at different times.

The next morning you wake to the sound of shuffling around you and when you open your eyes Steve is darting around the room.

"Good. You're awake. Get up and get ready so we can leave." Steve says curtly.

"What's the matter Stevie? Not much of a morning person?" You snark back without getting out of bed.

"I looked it up, the drive we're in for is almost four hours. The sooner we get on the road the better so we can actually get this done. Which means I need you to get up so we can get out of here."

"Sounds to me like you need a Snickers." You snort.

"Excuse me?" His head snaps to you with narrowed eyes.

"A snickers, you know, the candy bar- their slogan is 'you're not you when you're hungry' I'm making a joke about you being cranky- I cannot believe I just had to explain that to you. You really are a grumpy old man, you'd give Scrooge a run for his money sheesh." You scoff, finally pushing yourself out of bed.

"Are you just going to make silly pop culture references all day?" He rolls his eyes.

"Who knew you'd be such a Grinch so early."

"So that's a yes? The Grinch is a Christmas movie."

"So is Scrooge but they're grumpy all year round it's just worse around the holidays. Which begs the question, is the attitude just for little ol me, or does the Italian countryside always make you this prickly?" You smirk.

"Just. Get. Dressed." He says through clenched teeth. You roll your eyes at his grumbly attitude and grab your clothes to change in the bathroom.

"There's some fruit amongst the groceries by the way. I suggest you have one, might put some pep in your step." You taunt before shutting your bathroom door.

"It won't be so bad! Maybe you'll find a way to connect with him! Steve's not a complex man." You mock all your friends in the mirror as you put yourself together. "Complex?! God, I wish! He's about as complex as a cardboard box with half the personality. Honestly if only he were complex that'd be so much easier." You rant to yourself. "Thank the stars the universe practically dropped this guy's location in our lap because there is no way I'd survive a week with this guy." You grumble. You change your clothes and brush your teeth letting out one more deep breath before leaving the bathroom.

"Alright. Ready to go when you are." You say tossing your things into your bag and zipping it up.

"Good. Let's go." Steve grabs his bag and practically storms out of your hotel room without a second thought. You pick up your duffle and what's left of the produce you brought and trot down to the lobby where Steve's already checking you out.

"Hello!" You smile at the woman behind the desk.

"Hello darling! So sad to see you go so soon!" She smiles at you.

"We'd love to stay longer but there's so much to see and not nearly enough hours of our trip." You say wrapping your arm around Steve's and resting your head on his shoulder dreamily "Isn't that right Grant?" You sigh.

"Yeah! We've got so many plans! But the stay here has been lovely." Steve says smiling at you with kindness that even you almost believe is sincere. It makes you want to put ten feet between you and you have to force yourself not to react outwardly. With one last goodbye to the woman at the counter, you and Steve leave the hotel and load your things into your truck. As soon as Steve starts driving he uses the communication system to contact Tony.

"Rogers. Status report?"

"We have a lead that we're following and need to know how quickly we can be extracted from Italy if we've successfully located the target." Steve tells him.

"Have you located the target?" Tony asks.

"I spoke to a woman that says she gave our target directions to another town over so we suspect he'll be there." You interject.

"What if he's moved?" Tony asks.

"Well based on what the woman said, he was around for a few weeks before he left so I think it's safe to say he's likely still there." You say.

"We can extract you as quickly as tonight if you're able to apprehend the target."

"That would be-"

"Too soon. Can you plan for an extraction tomorrow morning?" You cut Steve off and he shoots you a glare momentarily.

"Tomorrow morning?" Tony clarifies.

"Yes. Assuming our lead is correct we'll be ready to go early in the morning." You say.

"Yeah sure. We'll get you a jet and leave it in a holding pattern. Say, 6am?" Tony asks.

"That should give us enough time. If something changes we'll let you know." You say. Tony mumbles an affirmative before disconnecting and you put your headphones on for the remainder of the drive with your head in your book. When the four hour drive ends and Steve pulls up to where you'll be staying you push open the door and hop out of the truck. Steve sorts out your room with the owner of the small hotel you're staying in and practically slams the door when you're in your room.

"Why would you tell Tony to set us up for tomorrow and not tonight? If they could be ready tonight we should take tonight!"

"I thought we were on the same mission but it appears that you are somewhere else because we don't even know where this man is. We just got here and even if we walked outside and saw him right now we can't exactly snatch him in the middle of the day. What happened to that spiel about 'stealth to minimize the likelihood of endangering civilians'? If they plan to extract us tonight that is not a reasonable timeframe and I'm sure you know that. You're just picking fights for no reason." You roll your eyes. Not to mention he waited hours to bring it back up- who stews this long over a departure time?

"Eight hours seems like a pretty reasonable timeframe for me. My fault for overestimating your capabilities."

"If you think I couldn't do this shit in eight hours you're smoking. On my own, I'd have no problem with an eight hour timeline but we are not the team that can be rushing into a mission like this when we don't know what the details are. Honestly Rogers whatever your fucking problem is table it. We have someone to find and we're pretty far from the landing pad so we need to be done and on our way in like twelve hours. I am going to start tracking down our target so we can actually arrest this guy. Skulk in here if you want." You grab your sunglasses and (mostly prop) tote bag and leave Steve in your room. You can't fathom why Steve is annoyed that you asked for a few extra hours to make sure you can actually complete this mission but that's his problem. The sun feels nice on your skin as you walk around surveying people from behind your big sunglasses. When you walk into a small cafe after some time and scan the few customers you almost miss the face you've memorized from your briefing file. He's sitting in a corner eating with a newspaper. You order something small to not raise suspicion and eat it quickly before exiting the shop. There are lots of places to give you a vantage point of the cafe's entrance so you pick one and wait out of sight for Müller to come out. Eventually, he strolls out of the cafe and turns left so carefully, using buildings as cover, you follow Müller for some time. He doesn't stop anywhere until he comes to a small house at basically the edge of town. You watch the house for a while hoping that he'll leave for you to check it out a bit closer. When it starts to pass a half hour you ruffle through your tote for one of the random prototype gadets Tony's always giving you to test out. One of the things is a little box holding a buglike device. You remember him explaining this one, it's supposed to do surveillance. You open the box and turn it on, feeling your phone vibrate in your pocket indicating it's connected. You locate an open window and release the camera bug towards Müller's house, making sure it gets inside before heading back to your hotel to make a plan.

"What have you been doing for the last two hours?" Steve asks as soon as you walk back into your room.

"Tracking Müller. Like I said I would. Did you just sit and sulk?"

"No." Steve glares. "Did you find him?"

"Yes I did. It looks like he's staying alone too." You say passing your phone to Steve for him to see the footage from the bug camera.

"Wait you planted a camera?"

"I saw him in town and followed him til he ended up at this house. Then I used one Tony's little doodads. It's a camera the size of a bug that can fly like one too."

"So you know where this is?"

"Yes I do. It's practically at the edge of town. We should have no problem getting to him later."

"Okay." He nods. "Alright so here's what we'll do. We'll track him with this camera til nightfall and then we'll go get him. It should be quick, sneak in knock him out and get him loaded into the truck."

"Yeah okay." You nod, taking your phone back from Steve. Periodically you check the camera bug that follows Müller around his temporary home over the next several hours. Just before the sun goes down, you notice something odd when you're checking the footage. Müller's moving frantically about, it looks like- he's packing.

"Müller's on the move." You say grabbing the keys to the truck and rushing out of your hotel. Steve runs out behind you.

"Y-Alissa wait!" Steve calls as you start the truck and he almost doesn't get in quick enough as you pull away. "Geez y/n where's the fire?" He asks.

"It looks very much like Müller is about to get the hell outta dodge. We need to move now." You say.

"Wait a second this is very much not what we were planning to-"

"Yeah well that's gonna have to change the man is packing his bags as we speak."

"Are you sure that's what you saw I mean-"

"Rogers argue with me later." You grumble out. Driving, the trip to Müller's is much shorter and you're there in only a few minutes. You hop out immediately even as Steve calls for you to give it a minute. No way are you letting him get away when he's right here. You burst into the small home, that's really just one room and shock the man inside so hard he almost trips. He's quick to get his barings though and lunges at you, grabbing a kitchen knife on his way towards you. You dodge him pretty easily even though he weilds the knife much better than you'd expect of a labcoat. He manages a couple scratches before disarm him and take him down with a plate to the head.

"Dammit y/n. I told you to wait." Steve grits out angrily as you drag Müller towards the truck that's still running.

"What's the big deal? We got our guy." You shrug, folding Müller into the backseat awkwardly."

"Maybe you were too busy charging like a bull to notice that we've drawn attention." He hisses.

"So let's hit the fucking road." You roll your eyes and climb into the passenger seat of the car. Steve lets out an angry huff but gets in the driver side and begins your trip back to the launch pad in central Italy. It'll take you most of the night to get there but you let Tony know to expedite the jet since you'll definitely be there before 6am. At some point, you have to sedate Müller when he starts to groan in the back seat. By the time you make it to the launch pad, agents are waiting with the jet.

"Agent y/l/n, Captain Rogers. Welcome back." One of the agents nods at you both when you exit the truth.

"Hey Jackson. Müller's in the backseat- mind grabbing him for me?" You smile as you tug your duffle out of the car.

"Of course." He nods opening the back door and hauling Müller's still unconscious body from the truck to the jet with ease.

"I could've handled that." Steve says to you.

"Who cares? I probably could've handled it too but we have bags to grab and the fewer trips the better." You roll your eyes.

"The jet's fueled and prepped for takeoff and our reports indicate clear weather so it should be smooth travels." Agent Jackson says to you, although Steve is likely going to monopolize flying.

"Thanks. Then I guess we'll be off." You say heading onto the jet. You toss your bag down and take a moment to secure Müller to the seat he's in at the back of the jet while Steve talks to the agents for a few minutes before following you into the aircraft.

"Make sure he's secure." Steve tosses at you as he passes.

"No shit Sherlock." You roll your eyes, getting into your seat up front next to him and strapping yourself in as he prepares to fly.

"If he wakes midair we don't wanna worry about him ambushing us."

"First of all what're the chances that guy would even be able to take us both? Secondly, I'm not an idiot, he's chained to that seat. Even if he wakes up he's not going anywhere." You scoff.

"To your question; better safe than sorry."

"Yeah whatever." You mutter.

"Not whatever, in fact, speaking of, you were extremely reckless last night." Steve says sternly.

"I was instinctive."

"Oh please. You rushed over there without a plan, ignored my instructions, and charged in carelessly. What if he was armed? Not to mention the fact that people noticed that something was going on. You could've gotten somebody hurt."

"First of all he was armed technically and as you can see, not a scratch on me so can it. You saw just as well as I did that he was packing his things Rogers, the man was about ready to flee and we could not lose him."

"We had a plan-"

"Plans change Rogers its not the end of the world."

"It is when you put people at risk dang it. If you had just followed-"

"If I didn't move when I did we could've missed our chance entirely. He wouldn't be here if I followed 'the plan' that didn't account for a frantic relocation of our target. I made sure the mission got done and the only person at risk was myself which would be the case regardless because that comes with the territory."

"You-"

"God are you two married or something?" Müller's voice shocks you even as you and Steve respond immediately.

"NO!" You shout together.

"You argue like a couple." Müller muses.

"You are so very wrong about that assumption." You scoff.

"Well I was only pointing out-"

"Don't. As a matter of fact if you speak again Müller you'll spend the remainder of this flight strapped to the outside of the jet like a cannoe."

"Can you even do that?"

"Do you really wanna find out?" You glare at him. That effectively shuts him up and cuts your argument with Steve short so the rest of your flight is flown in silence. When you land, it's you who unchains Müller from his seat and puts him cuffs to drag him out of the jet.

"Thank God that's over, the tension between you and the obstinate man was getting unbearable." Müller says.

"Whatever you were sensing was not tension. We barely get along." You roll your eyes.

"Does he know that?"

"Excuse me?"

"When you aren't paying attention he looks at you as if you're responsible for the stars in the sky."

"Those glasses of yours must be the wrong prescription." You scoff.

"You may think me many things but a fool should never be one. You might not agree but some things are easier to observe as an outsider."

"When it comes to people I'd take advice from a Nazi scientist is absolutely not on the list so please save it." You say.

"Y/n! We'll take him from here." An agent grabs your attention as you make it to the building. The walk from the helipad has never felt so long.

"Consider what I said." Müller says as he's dragged off.

"What he said?" Steve frowns from behind you.

"Just- mindless blathering." You grumble walking off to your room. You are not about to let some idiot you just met with no idea who you are get in your head about something he absolutely does not understand.

"Y/N! YOU'RE BACK!" Wanda bursts into your room just after you've closed he door.

"You are- always the first to find me." You chuckle as she throws her arms around you.

"I missed you so much! I almost called you like five times."

"Wanda I was only gone for like four days." You laugh.

"And the HBIC has returned." Natasha strolls in and sits on your bed.

"Hello to you too Nat." You chuckle.

"So? How was it?" Wanda asks.

"Well I didn't shove a dagger between his shoulderblades." You shrug and Natasha laughs.

"Oh come on, that can't be all you've got to say." Wanda scoffs.

"Honestly Wanda not stabbing him in the spine is a pretty raving review for a mission where I had to pretend to be his honeymooning wife."

"Did you even have to play the loving couple?" Natasha asks.

"Well when we got to the first place the woman checking us in was a lovely old Italian woman who was very interested in the fact that we were honeymooning so around her we did have to do the hand holding and dreamy sighing for her sake." You shrug.

"You made it back pretty quickly." Natasha points out.

"I'm efficient." You shrug.

"What does that mean?" Wanda asks.

"It means I tracked down Müller with the help of some gossiping women in town and good old fashion espionage then I made sure he didn't get away once we found him by apprehending him when I realized he was definitely about to vacate. Much to Steve's dismay apparently."

"His dismay?" Wanda frown.

"He lectured me twice because we had a plan and I had to make a change last minute when I saw the guy frantically packing his bags on our little surveillance bug."

"Wait so what was his problem?" Natasha frowned.

"We had a plan and I couldn't follow it. If I'd listened to him we totally would've lost Müller all together. He just hates when he's not the one calling the shots. It's like any decision I make that's not his idea is wrong. I know I said I don't hate him but man does he make it hard to believe that."

"The way you butt heads- I can't believe you made it home and in four days no less." Nat shakes her head.

"Like I said I'm efficient. And personal feelings will never stop me from completing a mission. You can say lots of things about me but you'd be lying if you said I don't do my job well." You shrug. A knock on your doorframe grabs your attention to find Steve standing in the still open doorway of your bedroom.

"Hi Nat, Wanda." He nods to them.

"Welcome back Steve!" Wanda waves.

"Hey Rogers." Natasha nods.

"Y/n, we need to talk." Steve says looking at you.

"If you're going to complain again about me not sticking to your plan save your breath. I have better things to do and if you have that much free time I suggest you follow my example and find a better way to spend it." You roll your eyes.

"It's not that."

"Then what do you want?"

"Alone, please." Steve glances at Natasha and Wanda who look at you.

"Go. I'll talk to you later girls." You tell them and they quickly slip out of your room. "Make it quick Rogers I just spent 4 days with you and I think that is plenty for us for a while."

"What Müller was saying-"

"On the jet? He's an idiot, who cares? As if anyone with sense would assume we're married the way we argue." You scoff.

"Not on the jet. After we landed. His, 'mindless blathering' as you put it."

"Are you expecting a play by play of that conversation because it was so inconsequential I've already forgotten most of it-"

"I heard him. My hearing is- better than average so, I know what he said."

"So did you just ask for funsies earlier?" You frown.

"Well no I just wondered what you'd say about it."

"He doesn't know either of us so I have nothing to say about it. The ramblings of some criminal are the last thing on my mind so if you've come here to tell me not to pay him attention I already wasn't-"

"You are so frustrating." Steve huffs out.

"Excuse me? What is your problem?!" You blink at him.

"My problem is you! You are my sole source of torment!"

"The fact that you are a boring bitch is not my fault! How am I the source of your torment you walking piece of styrofoam!?"

"Oh where do I begin with you?! Your smile makes my heart ache!"

"Yeah well you- wait, what?" Your eyes widen as you process his words, retort dying when you realize he didn't actually insult you.

"You walk into a room and it immediately lights up. Your laugh is better than symphonies. You are so effortlessly so amazing that you've enthralled me without trying. It's incredibly annoying." He rattles off.

"I- I'm really confused." You frown.

"Damn it y/n I'm in love with you!" He forces out. Plot twist. You totally did not see that coming.

"You're in love with me?"

"Somehow yes and everything you do makes it worse. It's infuriating to know my life is no longer mine and that is in in fact yours."

"This is the most paradoxical love confession I've ever gotten. Do you want, an apology or a date?" You ask.

"Wait- what?" Now it's his turn to give you a wide eyed stare.

"Well, you're in love with me but you seem to be very... inconvenienced by it so- should I be saying sorry or telling you to plan a date for Friday night?"

"Wait y-you'd go on a date with me?" His brow furrows.

"If you'd ask me on one."

"I thought you hated me?"

"You're critical of everything I do. So I intentionally get on your nerves. If I had known it was because you had a crush on me I might've been nicer to you. We aren't in kindergarten though Steve being mean to someone you like doesn't get you anywhere." You cross your arms.

"So- will you go on a date with me?"

"Yes I'll go on a date with you. Does Friday night work for you?"

"Friday's Perfect. I'll- let you know the details once I sort them out."

"Alright. I'm going to finish unpacking. I'll see you around." You smile.

"Kay." Steve's cheeks tinge slightly pink as he smiles at you in that shy 'you make me nervous way'.

"Anything else?" You ask when he doesn't move.

"Oh! N-no. I- I'm gonna go." He tells you.

"Okay. See ya." You chuckle as he scrambles out of your room. You can't believe you have a date with Steve Rogers. He may not be a complex man but he sure is a confusing one. To think all those times he was picking fights with you was because he had a crush- you almost hate the way it makes you giddy to think about it. But honestly who could stand a chance against a love confession like that? His life is yours?! You've never even heard him speak so dramatically before. When he came in here you said four days was more than enough time for you to spend to gehter and now well, let's just say you can't wait for Friday.

***

[tame-a-messenger]

i enjoy damien and angela together in videos (mostly because im a fan of either of them seperately) but i really cannot see them romanticaly together lol, or being that tight with each other even as friends. is that a cmon thing in the damngela ''ship'' here? i cannot decide if damngela is as big of a thing some twitter users make it out to be or if they are just exagerating because of how much they hate it? one of the first things that comes to my mind when i try to picture them romanticaly/or that close is in the video ''why we are bad at first dates'' with angela and courtney, angela talks about how she doesnt like it when his date has a lot of selfies with cringy faces etc. just in general cringe factor gives her the ick. and i love my boy damien but he is so unapologetically cringe on social media while also posting a lot, his instagram presence reminds me of older instagram where people whould post random selfies with bad lighting or just post random stuff that now mostly go on stories, most other people now (esp famous people but even non-famous people have the tendency of posting like they are lol) use insta as this curation of really well picked pics while dam just posts whatever and loove making those dumb faces lol. this is small but it reminded me of him when i first heard that and it made me giggle thinking about the possiblity of her cringing to those

I really enjoy them as a duo!

Damangela definitely isn't as big as Twitter makes it out to be, ESPECIALLY with shipping them. I have only come across a small handful that actually romantically ship them, and even then they aren't being weird about it (opposed to Shourtney shippers or Ianthony shippers, some of those guys go a little wild)(Referring to invasive shippers)

Personally I can see why someone WOULD ship them, they both are big theater kids (they have stuff in common), they are both very attractive, they do a lot of 'flirtatious' things to each other sometimes so I don't find it too weird for people to see that and say "They like each other!" especially since I know what it's like being a teen and seeing two people that you like (and maybe crush on) and want them to be together.

It's a totally natural process that I've experienced before, no shame, IT'S FUN. (being young and figuring out what you like and who you like is a big part of growing up).

I do think a lot of people that are really aggressive towards Damangela is coming from not liking Damien or just being hyper focused on other Angela ships? a lot of the accounts that I've seen not liking them are big Amangela and Courtgela shippers (it quite honestly looks like shipping wars from back in the day lol) Which again, no shame in shipping! I find those ships fun too! it just seems really weird to be attacking another ship because you don't like them. (anytime I've perused twitter looking for edits or content of Damangela I mostly see people hating on it, it's weird)(I don't post about ships I dislike? but freedom of speech <3)

"angela talks about how she doesnt like it when her date has a lot of selfies with cringy faces etc"

I think this is hilarious considering whenever Damien makes stupid faces Angela is ALWAYS pointing and laughing at him, and saying she loves it when he does it lol. I really don't think that's a reaction of cringe, if anything she thinks he looks lame and wants to bother him about it BECAUSE IT'S FUN. (does she not realize she does stupid faces too? "waitress in a small town" face anyone?)

I have things that I get the 'ick' from too, but if I really liked other aspects of a person it wouldn't bother me as much, if at all. I'd probably (and have) ended up really liking the thing that gave me the ick if the right person was the one doing it. (thin line between love and hate kinda thing)

I can see why people would be acting weird about Damangela because they want male/female relationships to not always be seen as romantic. That makes sense to me, but I still think it's weird to be hating on shipping at all. Unless it's incredibly invasive. (Personally I think it's weird to say shipping Amangela is fine and Damangela isn't, because Amanda is married and not into women, I could make the argument that that's also weird and invasive to be shipping them going by some of the logic I've seen)(just some food for thought)

Regardless of shipping, Angela and Damien have really good chemistry, so it's not a big wonder people would like them together!

They way they make fun of each other in particular is something that I find different to every other duo at Smosh. They just feel like they're on equal ground? like Angela really looks up to Shayne as like a bigger funnier brother, and Chanse like a knucklehead little brother.

Every other relationship Angela has at Smosh feels like she's trying to garner favor, whereas with Damien she is already in his favor, (by virtue of him being extremely kind and her being awesome) so they get into this cycle of picking on each other over things that don't really matter to them. Like Damien being a nerd, she doesn't actually dislike him for it she just likes to rile him up about it, and because he gets riled up he makes fun of her and calls her names back!

They both seem to be people that love to debate and argue! (I love debating so no wonder I love their dynamic <3 those that get it get it, those that don't don't)

So to wrap up, it's totally fine not to like a pairing! but it is weird to put other people down for something you are also doing. There are a PLETHORA of reasons why someone would ship something and unless they are being extremely invasive about it they aren't doing anything wrong.

[opinated-user]

I find LO posting things that say "well, there are people I'd apologize to, but it'd be used as ammo by my stalkers so I can't" a really lame excuse.

I mean, first of idk why she'd even bother posting that stuff since if ur not going to apologize, these posts are essentially just looking for sympathy. They're pretty much a 'poor me' response.

Second if she genuinely feels like she owes an apology enough to feel the need to explain why she is not doing so then just apologize. Will some people take it in bad faith--yeah, that happens when ur a public figure and it sucks, but that's not a valid reason not to apologize if u truly did something shitty.

I'm pretty sure her latest post saying this is probably about Sunny and her poor response to Astrid, calling it a 'spat'. And although what she did was super shitty, it's not as if an apology exposes any more wrong doing on her part or admits a crime (like apologizing to Courtney would). All she has to say something along the lines of "I'm really sorry for how I responded to those asks about Sunny. I was wrong to belittle what happened to them. We may no longer be on friendly terms but regardless I shouldn’t have said what I did."

Like idk, that doesn't seem like to much to ask, but lily seems to only apologize if it's something small and someone who is overly polite about pointing out her mistakes (take the criticism she responded to about Aliana as opposed to those she brushed off/denied as an example).

i feel like i'm saying something that should be plenty obvious here but... an apology should be for your own accountability. if you truly feel like you did something wrong and want to tell other people that you know you did wrong, that should be it. our reaction should matter none in that equation because it's not about us, it's about what you feel that is the right thing to do, even if the apology is not accepted in the end. by do making it about our reactions and we might say about it, LO made herself the most important thing in the entire conversation. it doesn't matter what she did wrong, to whom she hurt or who it could affected her wrong actions, because what matters is that LO doesn't get inconvenienced in any way. because let's imagine an scenario in which LO says sorry for absolutely whatever is that she did wrong. some of us say "too little too late" or something along those lines... so what? how is that such a huge detriment that warrants avoiding apologizing at all in the first place? is LO really that fragile? (the answer is yes, she is)

it's selfish and cowardly. just say that you don't want to apologize instead of trying to shift the blame into "the stalker". just say that you don't care about whatever person is that you hurt. just say that. you already do by putting such weak excuses as to why you can't apologize anyway, but at least it would be way more honest.

it's especially gross to do this "i'd apologize but i don't want to" when the subject is minimizing child rape. why it has to be such a quest to get LO to admit that child rape is wrong? if that post was even about Sunny at all.

[sarnai4]

The (Dis)Agreeable

I'm not sure if this is a hot take or not, but it goes against some of the things implied in the series (spoilers for RTTE). I don't think Oswald the Agreeable was a good father.

The show paints him as this peaceful, friendly man who never wanted wars and loved his kids. Sounds great, but I find contradicting evidence in the episodes.

There is something to be said about young Dagur's conduct with people. I get it that he's got probably a cocktail of mental illnesses, but that doesn't mean that he's incapable of acting in nonviolent ways. We see him do just that later. So, why was he not told as a kid, "No, don't try to drown your friends. That's mean and dangerous. Don't put people in cages and feed them cod heads." etc.? I feel like the first part at least was never told to him because he didn't act like him almost drowning Hiccup was in fact a scary experience for the younger Viking. Not saying that Oswald needed to watch his every move, but Dagur isn't a shy person. He's noticeable. If he's doing something (assuming his goal isn't to be sneaky, which it didn't seem to be with that drowning attempt), you're going to see/feel/hear him. Why not just sit him down and explain what's right and wrong? Dagur recalls being told to not do things like chase chickens and have axes, but I'm not sure if there's really a reason given behind it vs just knowing that his father didn't want him to do that.

And then there's Ansson. If you've read my previous post, you know I think he's at least 8 years older than Dagur. That makes me wonder where Oswald was during all that. This begins tying into another point. His relationship with Dagur must have been pretty bad if the other Berserkers actually thought Dagur killed him. Aside from the implausibility of Hiccup being able to, if he said he killed Stoick, people would be shocked because they know the two Vikings care about one another. No one seemed to bat an eye with this. "Dagur killed his old man? Yeah, figured that was just a matter of time." What were their interactions like if something so violent just made sense? To address a counterargument, maybe they just believed this because of Dagur being who he is. Fair, but here is the major issue: they never should have been able to think Dagur killed Oswald.

Where did Oswald go? We know he shipwrecked on Vanaheim, but where was he headed and why? Clearly, Dagur wasn't with him if he got lost out on sea. Dagur also didn't know where he was. No one else did either. Therefore, it implies that Oswald left home without telling anyone. I doubt this was to sign a treaty since that was stated that he'd bring Dagur along and I'm assuming the other Berserkers would know. So, why did Oswald suddenly leave without telling anyone where he was going? As both a father and chief, that's irresponsible. They have 50k soldiers, so who knows how many overall Vikings they have when you take into account kids, the elderly, and whoever just wasn't a soldier? Oswald left Dagur with all of these people. It's obvious that the boy wasn't ready. We saw how well that first year of being a chief went. At least, I'd expect him to tell someone, but no one knew. This sounds like he didn't just go out, he left. Oswald left and had no intention of coming back.

Then, you have "The Search for Oswald...and Chicken." There are a few things which are said here hat bother me. The letter itself was strange since Oswald mentioned Dagur protecting Heather even though she was a small child when she was lost and given the annual nature of the treaty visits, Oswald would have left long after she was missing. I think this is just a case of a plot hole that no one caught, but if we make it canonical, it's him fantasizing about his preferred life. He might have gone mad on that island. I can think of no other reason for him to write a letter about and to the daughter he'd no longer had on their home for years. Along that line of thinking, I doubt we can trust that his positive words to his son were genuine as opposed to being due to his false memories. Even in another part of the letter, it's sad because he mentions Dagur growing out of his "crazy, destructive" phase/stage. Dagur sort of gives a sheepish smile and it's played as a joke, but that's really sad. His son is mentally ill and he's just hoping he grows out of it like it's a papier-mache phase.

But what's the saddest part to me is Dagur's thoughts and beliefs regarding his father. After the corpse is found, Hiccup says, "He loved you" and Dagur responds, "I guess we'll never know." That is heartbreaking to me. Hiccup could have said, "He'd forgive you" or "He'd understand" and I would accept Dagur's words. That would be fine. With someone dead, you have no way of truly knowing if they'd understand why you did something or if they'd agree. That said, you should know that someone loves you. It's not something you should need to confirm when the person in question is a parent. I know this happens in real life, but a healthy parent-child bond should have both parties know, "Yeah, they love me. Even if we disagree, we love each other." Dagur makes it explicitly clear that he and Oswald don't have that type of relationship since he didn't know if Oswald loved him.

Therefore, between not being a teacher or protector in Dagur's childhood, having a relationship that feasibly could have ended in patricide, abandoning his son to lead tens of thousands of Vikings, believing his mental state was a temporary inconvenience, and not making letting it be known that he was loved, I believe that Oswald might have been agreeable, but he also was a bad father.

[sonder-paradise]

Okay okay I know that everyone is speculating that Chuuya is the mysterious figure but like,,, I think the whole bloody panel moment feels kinda out of character for him? Not that I think he ain't capable, FAR from it but I don't believe that Chuuya would massacre someone that brutally (with all the blood everywhere) My train of thinking ofc Chuuya could have probably had a bad day and went crazy LMAO

I mean I think that’s why I didn’t fully believe it was Chuuya (and honestly I don’t wanna get my hopes up accidentally lmaoo)

Chuuya does enjoy fighting but the massacre-like killing of the panel gives me more of an Akutagawa vibe

The blood statins on the wall indicate an impactful blow but not only that, but some of them are high on the walls themselves.

Some reach below the wall and others are nearly at the ceiling. This reminds me vaguely of an ability capable of wiping them out at once or at least in one or two goes. Notice how there’s a literal pathway of bodies that leads to the door.

Really only two abilities come to mind when seeing this killing style, Akutagawa’s or Chuuya’s. On the off chance it is another character, you have to take in their height as well.

The person’s legs only reach to less than half of the wall panel if I had to guess. And even when they’re in front of the door, they’re small in comparison to where the hinges are located in it. Obviously Akuatagwa is not a contender in this guessing game. Chuuya is but there are other factors that make me feel unsure it is him.

For example, there are no impact markings on the wall or floor. I’m not sure if this is done hastily perhaps that’s the reason for no marks but when Chuuya fights, he generally leaves impacts due to his gravitational ability.

Honestly for a character that fights a lot, I can’t say much about his actual fighting style. His victims are usually killed with precision. Take the scenes in Fifteen Arc for example. When he merely shoots them with their own bullets.

But personally the smirks match up

If it is Chuuya, he is annoyed (which makes sense considering who he’d have to save) or bothered by something (also makes sense considering what’s currently happening to the port mafia). Since this killing is honestly very brutal and filled with either unneeded violence or annoyance and haste.

I also don’t see why Nikolai and Sigma would save Dazai since Fyodor and him are clearly moving their own chess pieces and trying to outdo the other. Saving Dazai from prison sounds strangely counterintuitive for Fyodor’s plans. (Unless he’s got something up his sleeve)

What does make sense is the two panels actually showing two different scenes. As someone mentioned previously, Nikolai and Sigma were never actually shown in the same panel as Dazai. In fact, the shadowy figure appeared in Dazai’s frame. Not Sigma or Nikolai. So perhaps it’s Nikolai and Sigma talking to Fyodor and Dazai screaming is lungs off in front of a different person.

Notice that their shoulder padding is sharper and creased. It looks like a coat basically (once again Akutagawa or Chuuya vibes) Sigma’s coat is generally rounded with a shape-ish edge but he’s also standing behind Nikolai. It would make sense for the black figure to be the leading one (Nikolai in this case) but Nikolai has rounded shoulders.

There’s one last thing I want to point out here that I haven’t seen many people take into account

The ability used to drag Dazai under? Look familiar?

But then again I’m a weak Chuuya simp so maybe I’m just grasping at straws and Asagiri is gonna bitch slap me and tell me I’m wrong

[issaxcharlie]

Spectacular!

Pairing: Alive! Luke Patterson x Fem Reader

Summary: Inspired by Nickelodeon’s Spectacular! Luke Patterson needs the money for his bands demo, and miraculously, that same night he gets an offer to fix his problem. The catch? Rockstar boy has to join his school’s show choir and put up with their fearless Female Lead Singer. (don’t come here searching for accuracy remember it’s inspired by a movie)

Note: I had a lot of fun with this one, hope you like it! Oh and it’s a little long so keep it in mind +8k👀💜

Say this is not her scene would be to fall short, but she has to make sacrifices to find greatness. The first thing she notices when she walks into the little club, is that it's packed. The people look excited and somewhat desperate and she doesn't blame them. The pamphlet marked they were supposed to start at 8:00 p.m. and it's already 8:40. She makes her way carefully until she finds a perfect place in the middle of the room.

The musicians take the stage visibly anxious, especially Alex who cannot stop moving his hands trying to probably calm himself down. Reggie and the rhythm guitarist take their positions. They look at each other one last time before beginning to play the enveloping sound of the pop-rock song. The bass line sounds insane and she hasn't heard Alex play drums in years, he’s exceptional. They could both play without their singer all night and she wouldn't mind.

The space in the center of the stage that belongs to who she came to see today, completely empty. The bassist seems about to take the first verse when Sunset Curve lead guitarist and vocalist Luke Patterson appears on stage.

She has seen him multiple times in the hallways laughing with her childhood best friend, Alex Mercer and her lab partner, Reggie Peters, but she has never spoken directly to him. Still, it's hard not to notice how handsome he is and how much of a charismatic personality he has.

“I'm living my life just the way I like, they say I get a little too loud. Try to push me in a box, over analyze. But I'm never gunna turn it down”

His voice is enchanting and mesmerizing, a sound that immediately reminds her of the best rockers in history and his movements and energy are electrifying. In seconds the entire audience is jumping and dancing to the beat.

“They say never and I say right now!” Y/N analyzes him excitedly. The passion with which he sings and plays his guitar reminds her of when she is on stage, although the two of them dedicate themselves to totally different things, their love for music is the same. She definitely has a lot of work to do to polish him and make him the perfect performer she needs, but if there's anyone who can accomplish the impossible, it's her.

“No one's gonna stop me tonight! Thank you, we are Sunset Curve, tell your friends!” The presentation ends and Sunset Curve leaves the stage. The girl moves quickly to catch up with them at the back of the club, but when she finally arrives, screams can be heard from two of the members of the band.

“I know you don’t like me, Bobby. But trying to sabotage the show by giving me the wrong time is just the most stupidest thing you've ever done!” The guitarist looks furious, his muscles are really tense and Y/N can't help staring at his biceps way more than she probably should.

"This fight of egos between the two of you has to stop, we can no longer continue to be in the middle." The bassist cries out, tired of all the bickering.

“You no longer have to, Reggie. It’s time to decide. The lousy rocker or me. Remember that the money for the demo is mine before choosing... I'm not sure Patterson's lyrics can compete without the money to record them.”

The guitarist looks down at the ground, a mixture of anger and sadness on his face. Alex and Reggie turn to see each other for a second and then position themselves on either side of Luke, no sign of doubt on their faces.

“We’ll find a way without you. Let’s see If you find one without us.” Reggie declared with a little smirk. Bobby grabs his stuff and gets into his truck without looking back, completely furious.

"Some things Bobby was angry about are true and you have to improve them. You are not a solo artist, you are part of a band." Alex points to Luke as soon as the truck is out of sight, but before he can respond the blonde intercepts the girl at the door.

“Y/N?” The three of them turn to see her, Reggie smiles at her while Luke looks pissed off.

“Hey guys, I came to talk to Luke.” Luke frowns in surprise while the other two gape for a few seconds.

"Really?” Y/N turns with a murderous face towards her friend, who puts his hands in his pockets and begins to walk. “...Okay. Meanwhile Reg and I are going to figure out how to get the drums in Luke's car."

"If you come for an autograph please be quick, I don't feel like socializing." The guitarist declares to the wind, not wanting to pay attention to the stranger who approaches him in the middle of the alley, no matter how cute she looks.

“I’m not a fan.” She confesses in a firm voice, trying to measure the situation.

"Oh, then I'll go. See you later beautiful." He's about to leave when her voice stops him.

“Patterson, come back here!” There's something about her tone that makes Luke suddenly interested. He turns to see her carefully, her chin is up, her shoulders back. Her lips are press together and her eyes look determined and he can't help but admit that the confidence she projects is really doing something to him.

“2 minutes, firecracker.”

“I’m Y/N Y/L.” Faced with no comment from the guitarist, she decides to continue. “I need a male lead singer for my group and I think you might be the perfect fit, after I'm done with you, of course."

He’s unable to believe what he hears. “A band? I think you know pretty well I'm already in one.”

“It’s not a band, it’s a group. THE group If I can say so myself. Spectacular!” She affirms with the first smile he sees her that night, and he can't believe it is possible that she can look even more beautiful.

"Don't you think you're exaggerating a bit with the spectacular thing? At least tell me the name or what kind of band is." She rolls her eyes and he chuckles in response, thinking it was adorable and hot at the same time.

“I already told you, Spectacular! It’s a show choir.”

“Is this a joke? Did Bobby sent you?”

“No and no. I know it’s not really your style, but I’m telling you I can make it work. I heard a bit of the conversation you had with the band, the prize of Nationals is 10,000 dollars. I'm willing to give you half for the demo, if we win, obviously. And I can assure you we will if you accept and do absolutely everything I say.”

“Firecracker, are you trying to tell me that all I have to do to raise the money is put on some stupid cowboy or tiger-print outfit and humiliate myself in front of an entire audience with my best jazz hands? Wow, sounds like a dream!” Maybe he got a bit too sarcastic, but meh, as pretty as she is, she's still a stranger.

“My name is Y/N, and I'm not appreciating your tone of voice.” By this moment the girl seems tired of the musician, who feels the frustration in her and tries to be more gentle.

“I- I’m sorry. Thanks for the offer, but I don't feel as desperate yet as to end my reputation in that way. I hope you find what you are looking for, but that’s just not me. I'm just a guitarist.” She nods, entwining her arms against her chest. He admires her for a few more seconds and turns to his car, where his friends are already waiting for him to help with the drums.

Before getting behind the wheel he turns to her one last time, but she is nowhere to be seen.

Fights between Luke and Bobby weren't new to the band. The big-headed attitude of both collided practically all the time and things had been getting worse in recent months with the more overconfident attitude of the guitarist, but they never imagined that they would end up in this situation.

The days go by and the boys are running out of time. They have to deliver the demo to the Orpheum offices in two months so that they can be taken into account for the great concert they will hold at the end of the year presenting the best new talents in the city. All they've heard from Bobby is that he's trying to build his own band but without much success. Still, he doesn’t fold his hands and continues to try on his own.

The three remaining members of Sunset Curve are in Alex's room lying on the floor with their instruments around trying to think of solutions, when Y/N's voice coming from outside refreshes the blonde's memory. “What did Y/N want to talk to you the other day?”

“Who?” Luke narrows his eyes in confusion.

“Y/N? The captain of the school’s show choir? She went to talk to you after Bobby left the band. Small, fire in her eyes, a lot of attitude.”

“OH, Firecracker! So that group is our school's choir? that's even worse. She tried to recruit me, even offered me the money for the demo if we win the competition in which they will participate.”

“What? She wants you in Spectacular? What did you said?” Alex heard that his friend's ex-boyfriend broke up with her and joined last year's national champions, but he never imagined that she would try to replace him with someone like Luke. Luke is distracted by a melody and doesn’t answer his friend's question.

"Why does your mom always leave her music on when she leaves to work?" The music is definitely not his style, they are always usually pop songs or even songs from musicals, but the singer's voice is one of the most beautiful he has ever heard so it never bothers him.

“It’s not her music, is Y/N.” Alex responds, wondering what the young woman is up to since she is never usually home at this hour.

“Who?” Alex's eyes widen, not able to believe his friend.

“Really? I already told you!” The guitarist tilts his head and shrugs. “Firecracker?”

“What does firecracker have to do with this?” Alex opens his balcony curtains and the silhouette of a young woman singing and dancing through her transparent pink ones comes to their visions.

“She’s so good bro, I thought it was a record too.” Reggie looks at her with a big smile as Alex rolls his eyes at Luke.

As soon as he sees her, the musician is in a trance, admiring the grace and energy with which she moves, wanting with all his might to remove the pink curtain that does not allow him to see her properly.

The song ends and a well-known melody begins to play with prominent bass and drums. “Guys, shut up! I’m trying to hear her sing.”

“It’s not us, man.” Reggie answers almost screaming with how loud the girl’s music is.

“What do you-” Luke turns around and sees his friends with their hands raised, the cables finally connecting in his brain. "She is listening our song?"

"Not just listening, she's also destroying your career, her vocals are amazing." The black-haired boy adds, smirking and running to connect his bass.

Luke excitedly opens the balcony window and sings the pre-chorus as loud as he can to get the singer's attention. “Call me in the morning to apologize, every little lie gives me butterflies.” She immediately turns around and smiles at the guitarist's cocky smile. She opens the curtain and the window and her sunset curve t-shirt is the first thing the band notices.

“Something in the way you're looking through my eyes, don't know if I'm gonna make it out alive.” Luke sings seductively towards her, each word fully dedicated to the woman in front of him.

Reggie accompanies them with his bass while Alex looks at his friends incredulously, an "Are you fucking kidding me." Comes out of the blonde almost like a whisper when he identifies the shirt that the girl wears as his.

Both sing the chorus together and the chemistry is unquestionable. Alex had never thought of this two together because at first glance they seem completely different, but thinking about it a little more deeply they couldn't be more similar. They are both passionate, headstrong, live for the stage, and are ridiculously talented and confident.

“Fight so dirty, but you love so sweet. Talk so pretty, but your heart got teeth. Late night devil, put your hands on me. And never, never, never ever let go.”

The performance between the duo is playful, driving, sexy and intense and Alex and Reggie can't help but feel like they're interrupting a private moment. As soon as the song ends, the girl moves closer to the window, blows them a kiss and closes it.

"Where did that woman come from?" Luke whispers as he tries to catch his breath. Nobody had enchanted him so much just by singing, well, nobody had enchanted him, period. But she’s definitely something.

“She has been my neighbor since we were 6 years old, we used to be best friends but we both drifted apart when we entered high school. She’s amazing, the best performer in the city.” Alex informs him and then Reggie adds his own piece of valuable information. “She’s my lab partner. Fun, smart, beautiful, the whole deal. A true gem.”

“Answering your question, I said no to her offer. But I guess the group of someone this rad can't be that bad. And we really need the money." The drummer purses his lips and nods. His friend definitely took the hook.

"Honestly, I always wanted to audition, I guess the three of us could try in, to support you obviously."

“Of course man, she sounded desperate when she asked, and if the shirt and song is any indication she is definitely a huge Sunset Curve fan. She tried to fool me by saying she wasn't a groupie, as if that was possible after seeing us perform.”

His friends leave the house and Alex plays on the drums the secret signal he had with the girl when they were younger, a minute later the girl appears in her window with an amusing smile, dressed in her classic blue pajamas.

“Really?” The drummer chuckled and his friend’s smile grows even bigger, a little laugh leaving her lips. “The shirt was a nice touch. A little much, but that idiot must have fallen for it completely. I want it back by the way.”

“You can see right through me. You know the invitation is open, right? I would love nothing more than to have you there.” He has known her his whole life, and realized early on that she was just trying to get his friend's attention to reconsider her offer by raising his ego, and he honestly doesn't mind. It's about time Luke met someone of his caliber. Perhaps her influence could do him good.

“I- thank you. I guess we’ll see. See you tomorrow.” She blows him a kiss and closes the window. Tomorrow sure is going to be an interesting day, Sunset Curve joins Spectacular.

Having to face Spectacular! And telling them they still don't have a male lead singer who can compete against Damian was not easy. Her options are running out and she honestly doesn't know what to do to save them.

Damian on stage is the best, it pains her to admit that she has never seen anyone like him. At first she thought she could continue without him, but it’s becoming increasingly obvious that he is just impossible to replace.

Everyone continues to practice the routine, clearly discouraged after her bad news and it honestly breaks her heart. She knows how much the group means to everyone for different and personal reasons and she can't let them lose this. So whatever she has to do, she’ll do it so they can have the leader they deserve.

“I thought the children in the choir would have more energy, this is just sad, firecracker.” She hides her wide smile before turning to the owner of the voice, who is entering the auditorium with his best friends. Money really talks, otherwise she can't explain what would make him appear here.

“Dude, can you please play nice? This is important!” Reggie looks flustered and scolds Luke probably louder than he planned. The guitarist just ignores him and winks shamelessly at her. Seems her little plan from yesterday was successful, now she just has to play the situation in her favor.

“Mercer, Peters... Patterson. Can we help you with something?” The performer shows a perfect poker face, Spectacular continues to practice but they can't help but turn their attention to the rock band.

“I came to accept your proposal, but only If we can include Reggie and Alex in the deal. I guess as long as I’m in whatever I ask shouldn't be a problem." He crosses his arms and gives her a confident smile.

“I could actually do with a few more members, specially as talented as Reg and Alex. As for you, you've already turned down my offer Lucas, but if for some reason you don't graduate this year, make sure you audition the next one. Now, let’s start boys." Y/N moves within inches of Luke to gently close his open mouth with her index finger, and gives him a small wink before turning and taking the other two musicians each on each arm and pulling them closer to where the group is still practicing.

“Y/N, you can’t be serious.” The skilled singer continues to ignore him as she explains to her new members something Luke can't quite hear.

The musician frustrates and walks until he is directly in front of her. “Y/N” He groans.

“I'm not firecracker anymore? That is just sad.” Luke looks upset, but she's determined to not let him have what he wants after what he said at the club, so if he wants the money that bad he's going to have to prove it.

“I’m going to explain you something quickly so you can go and stop wasting my time. I’ve seen your band play, I know how good these two are at singing, which means I don't need you anymore, nor do I have to put up with your rockstar wannabee attitude. I need someone that I can connect with and have the chemistry that leaves everyone forgetting how to breathe, and after yesterday, I just don't think that's you.” Right now she is grateful to be such a good actress because yesterday's act melted her legs, even though they were separated by the balconies. This man is unreal, totally unfair.

"I do, I wouldn't be surprised if they kissed at any moment." The bassist whispers as Alex looks at him with an incredulous face, he just slowly shakes his head from side to side and continues to see the leader of their band and their new leader in a starting contest, is kind of an amusing sight since Luke is definitely not used to having to face someone like him.

“It’s like you said, you are just a guitarist. Thinking you could handle something like this was ridiculous of me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a group to direct."

Y/N hopes she hasn't pushed the rockstar too much, but remains firm in her tactics and turns to the others to continue with the rehearsal. She signals them to put the most similar song to the Sunset Curve sound that she can remember at the moment to make Alex and Reggie feel more calm and to see if she finishes catching Luke’s interest, who still doesn’t move from where he is with his eyes fixed on her, which she takes as as a good sign.

The moment the song start, both sunset curve members smile, and Luke's voice is heard from behind. “So you're the girl, I heard the rumor.” He sounds powerful and captivating and immediately sets everyone's eyes on him. She doesn’t give him the luxury of turning to see him, but he is not going to give up and in a quick and agile movement he turns her by the hand.

“Why don't you break my heart, make it hurt so bad. Come on give it your best, nothing less, I insist, I want it just like that.” The girl should have thought more about her choice before asking for a song like this. Every word that comes out of the musician's mouth is addressed directly to her with an intensity in his eyes and movements that should be illegal.

She tries to get out of his way but he makes it pretty clear that he's not singing to prove himself to the group, he's doing it to prove something to her. Specifically, to prove her wrong.

“Stare me down, intimidate me. Oh baby please you'll never break me.” He comes dangerously close to her, basically inches apart, his eyes fixed on her lips and smiling flirtatiously as he sings, his eyes glinting mischievously.

She enters the song so as not to make him feel like she’s defeated and starts dancing with him to the rhythm, their movements matching effortlessly as they move across the stage.

She pulls herself back as far as she can, but Luke surprises everyone by doing a body roll on the floor, his arms looking more gorgeous than ever in that sleeveless shirt as they take the full weight of his body without any problem, his eyes never losing contact with hers. All the girls start to do small screams while Y/N's cheeks turn red at her thoughts. He slides on his knees towards her and gets up as he puts his foot on her to make her lose balance and catch her right at the end of the song.

“Why don’t you break my heart.” They've been in a trance since the song started and it's like it's just the two of them in the auditorium. Their lips are almost touching, neither willing to give up eye contact or move from their current position, until the applause and shouts of excitement bring them back to reality.

“I have chemistry with everybody that I sing with, firecracker.” He whispers to her lips before shifting the girl's full weight to his right arm to raise his left one to her face and carefully close her mouth with his finger, winking with a cocky smile before lifting her up.

Immediately everyone begins to advocate for him with all kinds of arguments that ranged from how sensual he was to how much of a presence he had on stage. Her best friend’s comment is the one that catches his attention the most. "You have even more chemistry with him than Damian, I didn't think it was possible." That definitely sounds interesting.

Y/N pretends to listen to her teammates before saying Luke can enter the group. The truth is that she knew from the first moment she saw him perform with Sunset Curve that he was a star, but this facet without the guitar and irradiating passion from his pores was something that left her speechless.

Still, she knew all the work that would go into preparing the band and it really was exhausting. For them to understand that they couldn't just sing like they do at the club, that there are rules to follow, dance steps they have to learn, facial expressions they have to master, notes they have to hit perfectly, wasn’t easy but they succeeded.

Along the way, she regained her bond with Alexander, her friendship with Reggie grew stronger, and each day she felt closer to Luke. She has been practicing a duet with him for weeks now, and the chemistry that they have set to burn the stage more than once. It was hard for her to ignore how the guitarist's hands feel on her thighs as he lifts her or the way he wraps himself around her, breathing softly down her neck or brushing his lips teasingly over her cheekbone. Both are very physical to show affection so small contacts such as hugs or caresses, as well as small kisses on the cheek or hand were very recurrent. They had also gone out multiple times alone and with their friends, from the cinema, the park, to see them play, to small parties at home, to midnight talks.

Reggie was the one who had her alone the most because they were lab partners, but no matter how hard the bassist tried to get information from the girl, he never succeeded. The truth is that not even she knows what is happening with the guitarist, she is for the first time in her life letting herself be carried away and enjoying the moment, and she’s loving it.

Luke and Alex are in detention after the brown haired boy made a mess in the classroom by putting together a little concert with the help of the blonde, and as they die of boredom, his mind can’t help to go to her for the 14th time of the day. "How did she end up in the show choir?"

Alex is blank for a few seconds but analyzes the question and realizes who they are talking about. “Spectacular used to be the most important show choir in the country, led by her mother, may she rest in peace. Y/N always wanted to be a part of it and when she lost her, it became a goal. She suffered a lot to get to the perfect star we see today, especially because her father is rarely there since he works outside the country. She has practically had to face alone auditions, injuries, she had to learn to sew, comb her hair and put on makeup for the show, sing for hours her solos with no one to encourage her, without mention that the current director could not care less about the group and practically leaves all the work to her. That’s why she’s so be fearless, she kind of has to."

“I didn’t know.” The sight of Y/N as happy as ever with his mother when he took her home for lunch the week before appears in his memory. She looked radiant as she ate his mother's famous stew and listened to stories of little Luke as he gently stroked her thigh while songwriting with his other hand. When was the last time she got to experience something as homelike as that? Luke probably doesn’t want to know.

Alex's sad voice brings him back to the conversation.“I was supposed to be there, you know? At first I was. We were going to audition for Spectacular together, but that summer I met you and Sunset Curve was born, and I didn’t have the time anymore so I abandoned her. I knew how important it was for her to have me there, and I didn't even go to her audition. And do you know how many times she has reproached me? Not even one.”

Luke knows that Alex would never hurt her on purpose and that the situation was probably much more complicated than he expresses it, so he reassures him and lets him know that she loves him and is proud that he took his own path. As soon as the blonde calms down, he begins to tell him multiple stories about when he and the girl were kids, the songwriter takes out his journal and begins to add lyrics to the song he has been working on, more inspired than ever.

“You are falling so deeply for her, man. I’m happy for you both.” His friend comments to him while reading the verses written on the paper. He totally is.

“Bowling, nice. I'm going to finish you off, Patterson.”

“As sexy as your confidence sounds, I'm not going to let you win.”

“I'm pretty sure you've never gone bowling.” Alex adds with furrowed eyebrows.

“Your point is, Mercer?” She wrinkles her nose and sticks out her tongue. Reggie chuckles amused.

"How can you be so sure that you are going to win?"

“Oh, my dear cute blonde. I’m good at everything.” She makes a slight remark on everything with her eyes fixed on the guitarist, who chokes while blushing.

She smiles cheekily at him and confidently steps into the room, Sunset Curve behind as Alex and Reggie tease Luke for being completely whipped.

Happiness doesn't last long when the first thing they see inside is Damian Miller along with a couple of his new teammates. The moment their eyes meet, Y/N seems to melt, but not in the good way.

Her firm and perfect posture now all bent as she embraces herself with her arms and tries with the strength that has left to hold her gaze at the person who took everything from her without much more than an empty sorry.

When she feels the guitarist at her side again, she unconsciously stretches her hand to intertwine her fingers with him, who tilts his head to see their hands together and then to see her face.

She is not doing it to make Damian jealous, but to feel supported. And when Luke realizes it, he can't help not feeling angry at the boy in from of them. In the month that he has been with her, he has never seen her doubt, fear, or believe anything less than that she is unstoppable. And today for the first time ever he sees her intimidaded, and the fact that it's because of a jerk like this makes it even worse.

He rubbs her hand to make her feel less anxious and when she turns to meet his eyes, he brings his index finger to her chin and winks at her, hoping she gets the message. She seems to do it because she immediately smiles playfully and begins to look more relaxed.

The guitarist is aware that Damian was his firecracker's first boyfriend, and he also knows how much he betrayed her love and trust. No matter how strong the woman is, her reaction is completely normal and valid, and that she has the confidence to be vulnerable and let him be there for her means a lot to him.

“Princess.” Damian whispers as he moves closer to her, his eyes fixed on Y/N and Luke's clasped hands.

“I’m not your princess, Y/L is just fine. Listen, Damian. I could pretend this is not uncomfortable and boring but, I don't want to. So yeah, excuse us.”

She pulls the hand that joins her to Luke to make him walk and Alex and Reggie follow behind them, looking at her ex boyfriend with little smiles of pride. Alex knows how much Damian turned off Y/N’s spark and seeing her put him in his place makes him feel so proud.

"So someone is going to teach me bowling or what?"

“I’ll do it baby, but another day. Today we came here with a different purpose.” Luke points to the large Rock the World machine located in a comfortable corner space.

“Of course, is always about music with you, eh Patterson?” She smirks, getting a little closer to him.

“Pretty much, but I can tell that attracts you, Y/L.” He wrinkles his nose, his lips parting slightly.

“Hell yeah it does.” he smirks, not at all expecting her to admit it so openly but he definitely should have seen it coming.

“Good thing I’m into dominant firecrackers then.”

“Could you stop flirting for a second and start playing? I have plans to destroy Alex and your daily session of sexual tension is not going to ruin it.”

Both smile at Reggie while Y/N takes the games microphone and Luke the guitar. The song that Y/N chooses is She’s so gone by Naomi Scott, and it goes without saying that the boys have never played it in their lives but they love a challenge.

The mastery with which the girl interprets the song makes a good number of people come to see the round, including her ex-boyfriend and his new friends.

“Here I am, this is me, and I'm stronger than you ever thought I'd be. Are you shocked? Are you mad? That you're missing out on who I really am.”

The singer sings the verse directly towards Damian, as his friends start pointing out and teasing him. Reggie goes over to tell Luke he thought he would join her, but the guitarist only replies, "I want to see her shine."

She gets carried away with the music and draws Luke to her, jumping and twirling to the beat of the music. The guitarist hyping her up every single second og the song. At the end the night was incredible, the four of them spent it singing, dancing and even bowling, which Y/N ended up dominating from the second round.

Luke thought that there would be no better time than that night to show her what he had been working on, so after saying goodbye to her he went to Alex’s where he had left his journal.

Before he can say goodbye to the blond, screams are heard from the house next door. “I wasn't trying to embarrass you, Damian!”

“No? So what were you doing shaking your hips against the rock boy?”

“I don't have to explain anything to you, but I think it's pretty obvious why I wanted to be against that body, have you seen it?” She says it playfully with her eyes fixed on the guitarist, who is walking with the blonde to her door, her eyes glinting wickedly in the dark. He chuckles, knowing it's the girl's way of reassure him and she smiles as she sees his expressions relax.

“Everything alright, firecracker?” Luke does not stand in front of her like a brave prince, he stops a meter from both of them and asks before intervening, and that makes her heart melt. Because he wants to hear her first, he trusts that she can take care of it and has the confidence to tell him if she needs help, which is also completely valid. And it's something she has to work on, know that there are also times when it's okay to trust someone. That you don't always have to carry the weight alone.

“Go away, punk. My girl and I are in the middle of something.” The three of them start laughing at the ex-boyfriend's intimidation attempt, who seems to get angrier with every laugh that comes out of their mouths.

“I’m fine baby, but you guys could show him the way out? I’m tired of his bullshit.” She asks the boy with a cute smile, and he would disintegrate over the nickname if her horrible ex-boyfriend and her best friend weren't there.

"Don't touch me, I’ll go. Right now the numbers are not working in my favor so we will fix this where it really matters, on stage. Let's see if this attempt at a singer can save you from total humiliation, because let's be honest Y/N, you are nothing without me."

The faces of both members of Sunset Curve begin to tense, Luke's fists completely white from how much he's clenching them. For her part, the singer, who is already used to that type of comments from her ex-boyfriend, only tells him "yes, yes, you're right. It was a pleasure Dami, never come back." while pushing him to the other side to make him go away.

The nickname comes off her tongue in the most natural way in the world, she doesn't even seem to notice it and Luke feels some annoyance hearing it. As if someone had hit him in the stomach. But immediately the discomfort goes away when the girl turns to them again with a big smile and runs to hug them excitedly.

“Thanks for coming to check me out, guys. Things can sometimes get out of control with him.”

"We will always be there for you when you need us, okay? I actually went into Alex's house to get something I wanted to show you but it's late, I’ll come back tomorrow." The blonde turns from his friend to the other, a tired smile appears on his lips as he passes Luke his journal to place his arm on his childhood friend and lean on her.

"No, don't go please. Damian was pretty mad and... I don't want to be alone." She can be very dramatic at times but the fear in her voice sounds sincere, and remembering the scream that brought them outside in the first place Alex imagines how scared she really was before seeing them show up and his heart clenches at the thought.

“O- Okay, sure.” He sounds nervous but the excitement is evident in the way his left leg keeps moving, just like when he's on stage.

“I do have to go in, you already know mom. Will you be alright with just Luke?” He already knows the answer from the girl's radiant gaze but it doesn't hurt to confirm. She hugs him tightly with her arms around his neck and whispers a "Yes, I love you but go away already." which makes the drummer laugh out loud while high-fiving his other friend goodbye.

The third wheel enters his house and finally they are alone. She smiles and takes him by the hand to enter the house. Luke takes a moment to admire it, everything is in place but there are several instruments throughout the living room. A keyboard on the couch, a guitar next to the TV, even a tambourine on the table.

"May l?" He walks over to the guitar and turns to see the girl nodding and pointing up the stairs for him to follow. Her room is quite similar to her style, white is the predominant color but there are many details in pink and gold, as well as multiple yellow lights giving a romantic tone to the room at midnight.

“Do you want to show me now?” she asks eagearly, with joined hands, closed eyes and pursed lips.

“Y- yeah... of course.” He sits on the rug and puts the guitar aside, then puts his notebook between his legs and when he finds the sheet he is looking for, he carefully tears it off. The girl looks at him adoringly, the happiness of having him with her making her heart beat louder in her chest. She sits across from him making sure to brush his legs and waits for him to speak.

“Here.” He looks nervous, his cheeks totally flushed as he avoids eye contact for the first time since they met.

Y/N takes the sheet in his hands and a huge warm smile appears on her face when he sees the guitarist's terrible lyrics. BRIGHT written and highlighted several times in the title.

“It’s for you.” Luke whispers while bringing his face closer to hers, making her shiver.

“You wrote me a song?” She doesn't know what to say. Since her mom, no one had done anything so beautiful, considerate, and selfless for her. Something so vulnerable and full of love.

“Don’t be mad, but Alex told me a little about how you ended up in show choir, your friendship with him, your mom.” He turns to see her looking for her reaction, she just nods to tell him it’s okay to continue. “A sweet story about a little girl with the voice of an angel who loved to sing love songs. And you know what was in my head all that night? That even though I've never written one, I would write millions of love songs for you.”

Some tears fall from the girl's face, she carefully places the lyrics on the guitar and throws herself on the guitarist, who falls in surprise against the carpet, making sure to grab her by the waist so that she falls safely on his chest. She rests her arms on either side of his head and brings her lips against Luke's, brushing them gently.

Luke doesn't move a muscle, not wanting to do something to make her uncomfortable, when he suddenly hears her talk. “And what about teeth? I mean is not the sweetest love story ever told but-”

The boy chuckles, Y/N's curious eyes a few inches away. “Alex wrote that one after his first breakup, Reggie and I did the melody.”

“Good. Guess we’ll have to start making some experiences to help you write all that songs.” At that moment she finally pushes her lips against his, both in a moment of euphoria at the taste of each other. She presses her body against him and he bites lightly with his teeth on her lower lip to shove his tongue against her mouth in response. Her little hands pulling his hair hard as his hands go down her butt. Both of them enjoying what they had been dreaming of for so long.

When the two finally separate they fall in a comfortable silence, she starts to admire his facial features, delicately running her fingers through his nose, his mouth, his cheekbones, until he interrumpts her. “I knew you want me from the beginning, I could see the lust in your eyes. Everything about the choir was a complex plan to get me under you.” Luke affirms with his best poker face, and sees clearly how her eyes fill with light while a pure laugh escapes from her now swollen lips.

“And as always, I achieved the goal. The hot local rockstar is sleeping on my bed tonight.” No matter how hard he tries, he can never catch her off guard and he always ends up being the one blushing. She kisses him softly before getting up and taking the song lyrics back. “Luke, do you mind if I sing a bit of the song?”

“Of course not, it's yours. I will accompany you with the guitar, from the pre-choir?”

She nods and begins to sing the words he wrote for her. “Life is a risk but I will take it, close my eyes and jump. Together I think that we can make it, come on, let's run.”

She is reading the choir as she sings and the urge to cry reappears. He's basically telling her that she no longer has to go on living life alone, that she can lean on him, she can trust him to fight by her side. That it can be us instead of I.

“And rise through the night, you and I, we will fight to shine together. Bright forever.”

As soon as they finish singing Luke puts the guitar aside and goes over to wipe the tears from the girl's face. “I know that at first glance it doesn't seem like a love song, but..."

“But it is. It’s perfect, thank you Luke.” She didn't know that someone other than her could make her feel so special, but he proved her wrong, again.

The night before was like a dream. Y/N sleeping with his shirt while he wrapped her completely in his arms, singing softly in her ear and leaving little kisses on her neck every few verses until she fell asleep. At this point there is no way to deny how completely in love he is with her.

“Man, we need to talk.” His blonde friend wakes him up from his daydream and starts pulling him down the hall to an empty table in the cafeteria, where Reggie is already waiting for them.

They both sit down and Alex takes a deep breath as he plays with his fingers, trying to form coherent sentences with the words in his head. “Bobby called last night.” Luke's gaze instantly shifted to disgust, while Reggie looks quite shocked.

“So? What did he want?” Luke whispers, trying to sound disinterested.

“He sent some of our videos to an important person at Destiny Management and they are interested in the band. He said that if we comply with certain requests he will give the money for us to record the demo this Friday so that it’s ready for the appointment."

“And I guess you told him we don't need him or his money. What did he answer you? He cried?" the guitarist asks with an amused face, but his friends just look at each other.

“Don't you think we should think more about it? What happens if we don't win nationals? We’ll have lost something as sure as Bobby's deal for nothing."

“She’s my friend and I love her but I have to agree, Luke. As difficult as it is, our priority has to be Sunset Curve, not Spectacular"

“But-”

“They are right, Luke.” All three look at the girl, as pale as If they had seen a ghost. “Spectacular is my dream, And I know I'd do anything for it. It would be unfair of me to get angry because you’re fighting for yours. Don't hesitate, if anyone can find a way out of this it's me.”

“But, the duet...”

“I’ll just have to be the melody and the words. I’ll be fine, and honestly I'm so proud of you guys, I know you will be rock legends one day.” All three feel guilty but don't know what to say or do to make it right. She goes over to hug the drummer and the bassist who take her in their arms with all their strength, a “I’m so sorry” from the blonde accompanied by an “I know” from the girl can be heard. Then she stands in front of the guitarist and kisses his lips intensely, but breaking away painfully fast. The guys leave lovers alone for a moment of privacy.

“I believe in you, baby. You are destined to be a star, forget everything else, even me. Take the moment and knock them off their feet.” She kisses him lightly on the lips and walks a few steps back. “This month was the happiest of my life in a long time, thank you. Guess I’ll see you guys around.”

“Why do you sound like you are saying goodbye? And a horrible one? I thought you were good at everything.” Luke walks over to her again and places his hands on her cheeks, rubbing them gently. His voice is shaky and his eyes are glassy, she snorts at his sudden taunt, a little smile covered with the tears.

“Once everyone gets back to their own business, do you think you'll still have time for me? Alex is my damn neighbor, and we couldn't keep in touch.” And Luke gets it. She is used to being alone, to people not being permanent in her life. Neither her parents, nor her best friend, nor her boyfriend, nor anyone else has stayed. So this time to protect herself she decided that he too was going to leave, that it would be foolish to think that he of all possible people would stay.

“I‘m not letting you go baby, you're the only one I would let to boss me around.” The girl laughs when she remembers the millions of times she had to correct him and how he always ended up making her blush in some way, especially when they danced. She can't remember telling him but dancing with him has been the most special thing she has ever experienced. She danced with Damian for years and it never felt like the first time Luke put her long, strong hands on her waist and pulled her close to him. She can only hope to feel that way again one day.

“You are my one and only, firecracker. We’ll find a way, neither of us is a quitter.”

They say that actions are worth a thousand words, and Luke had definitely missed his first chance to show Y/N that he was serious about them by not getting in time to wish her good luck before she left with the group to the city of the competition, a few hours from there. He couldn't help but feel more miserable when he returned to the studio and found a small yellow sheet in his journal.

“You got this, rockstar. I have so much faith in you, so go make me proud. And I don’t want you feeling guilty, okay? I always want to see you shine, baby, no matter what. Your firecracker, Y/N.” Luke laughs softly, dazzled by her attempt to be sweet. If she trusts him so much, why doesn't he return the favor? She assured him they could win and when she says something, she follows through.

Why ruin his life with all of Bobby's ridiculous demands while ditching his girl in the process when he can go sing with her and do band things their way, without selling their soul to the devil. He sits on the couch thinking about what to say to the boys when they both rush in and pick him up, one from his feet and the other from his arms.

“What the hell are you two planning this time?” Luke sounds annoyed but does nothing to stop them from moving him, they throw him into the back of the car and he hits his head, getting him to kick them before they close the door.

"I'm not going to let her down again, I can’t."

"Yeah, and surely we can win, the number is spectacular... do you understand what I did there?”

Alex rolls his eyes and Luke smiles. They drive at full speed to Luke’s for him to take all his things and when he returns to the car, stands thoughtfully by the window.

“What are you doing?!” Alex is not having it, looks like a vein is going to burst from stress any second now.

“Do you think we’ll make it?” Questioned the guitarist, clearly nervous.

“If you stop asking stupid as fuck questions and get in the car, maybe.” Luke pouts but listens and finishes loading everything in the trunk.

The road is full of music to try to calm all the nerves, there was also plenty of time to rehearse the number over and over again, Luke analyzing in his mind every move he had to make, from time to time his bossy girl correcting him in his head. The only difficult thing was probably changing into the costumes, especially for Alex.

They arrive directly to register and the band turns pale when they hear the powerful and breathtaking voice of the singer who is playing her solo right now, a heavenly version of 'Never enough’. By the time they are ready to go, the main number has already started, the imposing woman in the very center of the stage with one of the boys of the group, who although does not have the voice of the guitarist, is making a good effort. Damian is on the other side, staring at her with a superiority smirk and Luke can't help but want to punch him.

“I never realized how anyone could make everything so right, I was so sad, you brought me back.” Alex quickly indicates to him how to enter the stage from the back, and Luke prepares to jump in time for the chorus, taking care of not being seen as he climbs the platform. The song is an old pop-rock song from the 80s, specifically chosen to make the guitarist's voice shine. He and his firecracker sat listening to music for hours until they finally found it, the girl's eyes shining with excitement as she imagined all she could do with the potential of the melody.

“You give me something to believe in, after all that we've been through.” He appears on the platform just in time, the lights and smoke coming out right in his grand entrance. Y/N turns immediately upon hearing her voice and he dances his way towards her.

“The love you give, it all comes back to you. You give me something to believe in, you can see the real me. And here with you is where I'm meant to be.” both singing together the remainder of the chorus and dancing to the beat. The biggest smile he has seen in his girl since he met her on her beautiful face. With that he feels satisfied with his decision, whatever happens, win or lose, it was worth it.

“And here we are together side by side, and nothing seems impossible tonight.” the duet between them is electrifying as always, he puts his hands on her thighs and lifts her with ease, both of them moving and enjoying themselves as if they were the only ones in the place. The dance ends as the first time they danced in the auditorium when he showed her that he was the right option, he holds her with one arm, their lips inches from touching but holding the magnetism back for a few more seconds until finally leave the stage.

As soon as they are backstage Y/N throws herself at Luke, wrapping her legs around his hips and devouring his lips with hers. “Someone missed me.” Luke whispers catching his breath.

"I can't believe you guys did this for me." Expressed the girl as she turns to see her other two friends, still wrapped around Luke who has her tightly held with his huge arms around her butt.

“We trust you as much as you trust us. We know that you will win, you worked like nobody for this moment.” Affirmed the blonde, giving her a small kiss on the forehead.

“I feel like I won already.” And she did. She won the trophy, the money for the demo, friends, and a ridiculously gorgeous rockstar who drove her crazy in more ways than one. All this years working hard were finally worth it... and Damian throwing a tantrum in the middle of the stage felt good too, not gonna lie.

“When are you going to ask me to be your boyfriend? As much as I love you more than anything, a man has to have some pride, you know? We've been together for like 5 months and I'm getting desperate.” They are both lying together on the girl's bed, their legs intertwined as he makes little circles with his fingers on his girl's stomach.

She raises her head resting her hand on his bare chest, her thoughts impossible to read. What are you talking about? I'm waiting for you to ask me!” He chuckles, prepared to tease her. “Bu-”she interrumpts him, pushing the hand that is resting on him to sit down. “Ba-”

“Wait a second, Lucas!” He bites his lip, he never liked being called by his name but for some reason it sounds incredibly sensual when she says it. “Yeah, baby?”

“D- did you say you love me?”

“I did, and I do. Everybody knows you've got me trapped in your claws.” He jokes to make her laugh, and he succeeds.

“I love you too, so much.”

“I know baby.” He winks teasingly at her. “Returning to the topic, you are the most bossy and confident person I have ever met, and you want to tell me that you were waiting for me to take the first step? Doesn’t sound like my firecracker. You literally pretended to be a sunset curve super fan to get my attention.”

"I totally did, I was awesome, first thing next day you were at the auditorium.” She says proud while Luke rolls his eyes with a smile. “But if it makes you feel better, I'm 100% a fan now, and...You are completely right, for once.”

She takes a deep breath, intertwining her fingers with his. “Lucas Patterson, I want you, if we're being honest, probably from the first time I saw you at that Sunset Curve gig we met at. You are annoying, cocky, passionate, and I love you with all my heart. Be my boyfriend... please.”

“There it is, that’s my girlfriend.” His eyes full of lust after hearing that she wanted him from the first night, he draws her closer to him to push his lips against hers, his girlfriend's tongue quickly dancing with his.

"Oh my god, we already talked about this, close the damn window, I don't want to hear it!” The blonde cries from his balcony, the couple can't help but laugh before joining their lips again.

Thank you for reading ✨

Taglist: @writerinlearning, @ghostofmgg @strangerthanfanfiction713 @thebloodthirstyvampress, @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15, @magnet-girl, @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05, @twist3dtinkerbell, @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve, @caitsymichelle13, @ifilwtmfc @luckylouiebug, @bibliophilewednesday, @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01, @lunashadow6955, @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker, @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1 @lukeys-giggle @katie-navarro @crybabyddl @cocopuffs0211 @marvel-ousnesss @txrii @tuttigunner @dpaccione @justalittleweirdoo @mrstodorooki @averyharrypotterlife

[msgrumpygills]

Social Media Anon Here!

Firstly, never change Grumpy ;) you are probably the only person on Tumblr to LISTEN to another view and let it change a prejudice.

Secondly, the Padagram/Social Media change bus continues. Don't be fooled people will be looking at positive and negative reactions to that change on social media.

So here goes!

1. They are starting to market season 2 of Walker in Hiatus. That really doesn't happen. That means they know they need to target new viewers. They are acknowledging they have a problem. The main problem is Jared either didn't learn enough about production quality on SPN (Jensen/Misha were both more interested in behind the camera's) or that he thought he could stick a Stetson on and we all had such sh1t for brains we'd watch anything. So they need a viewer boost DESPARATELY and are going all out to (a) persuade Walkers remaining viewer(s) that it's worth sticking around and (b) get back old viewers or convert 1m+ viewers to season 2. So now we see all the cast (and Keegan has more followers than Jared and Lindsay has a VERY engaged following) trying to persuade their followers how fabulous Walker is. Expect this scrabbling to continue if they want their COVID paychecks.

2. Connected to 1, Jared has started trying to break out of the fandom bubble. I don't think he's trying for power couple (the clue in a power couple is that two FAMOUS people get together and create a super brand, here we have one niche C famous guy and a hanger on wife), I think we are in Jared profile raising and trying to raise his recognition score, which is probably a little low having half assed it in the last year and a half. He's doing it by scatter-gunning so I'm not sure it's going to stick.

3. Connected to 2,

(i) if I run my algorithm clean laptop with a "Jared Padalecki" news search, I get (a) a daily mail article on Jared "clarifying the rift" (b) a "hello" magazine saying he's been "inundated with support after death of "family member"" (c) the new york times article on Walker and Supernatural. It then goes into a variety of articles about Jared raising money for Holly's family (fucking atrocious in my view to use her death for publicity) and a series of derivative articles on his mantrum and later explanation. ONLY THE NEW YORK TIMES ARTICLE MENTIONS WALKER other than as a throw away, all of the others link to Supernatural only. Walker isn't on the main radar of anyone as a show. It's not mainstream enough to mention. it has ZERO buzz.

(ii) if I run the same search on my compromised tablet, I get a SEA of fluff articles "jared padalecki goes to venice", "jared padalecki's wife wishes him a happy birthday" "jared padalecki goes to watch soccer" "jared padalecki goes to the wrestling". I'm expecting "Jared Padalecki defecates regularly" tomorrow.

At the end of that I get the same articles as in (i) but the majority of his publicity is still going through the fandom and the, not very viewed, endless zine type websites that update on every episode of every geek show every day.

So we are seeing, and I expect it to continue, a break out Padalecki, (who knows he and his forehead may wish to have a final crack at films), and a fluff Padalecki, trying to stay relevant a year after SPN relevance ended, because he hasn't got the same push for season 2 of Walker as he had for season 1 and Walker has zero presence. No one, not even the fans are talking about Walker.

Will it work? I don't think so. Keegan has 7m followers on Insta and that's because he's a photographer and writer and it's interesting. I would follow his account (I don't), but certainly it isn't a Walker instagram.

Jared is a clever guy, but he's boring on social media. He has a limited appeal. He does family snaps, hunk snaps, flogs orange pee and flogs his show. He says "family" and "mantra" a lot but that's really it. The clue is, if you didn't know who he was and came across his instagram you wouldn't follow him. Why would you? For a video of a guy running up steps? A smug picture of two middle aged men trying to flog you something?... (oh and lots of "brother" comments on Keegan's social media, which is irritating. It's like he thinks that is his repeatable formula and it isn't).

His media approach won't work because advertising and exposure pushes a product. In TV's case, it's not a one off product and there is a lot of competition. Product Jared needs to be more interesting (his mantrum's are the only exciting thing about him - and that is tragic) and his TV show just needs to be BETTER, well, a LOT BETTER.

Soooo, expect the Padapush to continue, but it's not about a couple, it's about individual marketing and for Jared breaking out of SPN bubble. For Gen, it's her tag along profile that she'll never break out of. She'll have to be satisfied with her superpower of being able to persuade people to buy toothbrush's and dog food (if she can).

Expect though the couple's bit to die off a little. Jared is getting over exposed. His engagement rating is plummeting (nearly 3% is a plummet) because of the repetitive photo content. He'll have to back off or people will switch off (I have already). What makes me laugh is.... from the dawn of time when cavemen took their wives 2 miles away for a new cave weekend.... NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN INTERESTED IN SOMEONE ELSE'S HOLIDAY SNAPS.... Gen and Jared apparently need to learn that lesson...

I might stop these posts now because, well, it's gotta be a bit boring for you and I write LONG. :)

Stay safe and wear your masks ;) xxx

I don’t want you to ever ever change, lovely! Also, I’m NEVER bored by your messages! You put so much effort into the research you do and the messages you send and it’s appreciated! <3 

I started following Lindsey on IG because she seems pretty genuine, and her cat is way too cute! Plus, I like her attitude. I haven’t followed her for the whole Walker season, but even she doesn’t post a lot about it. She posts interviews and then posts about that night’s episode, but other than that, nothing.  Can’t speak for Keegan, but how are fans and non-fans supposed to be excited about a show when the people STARRING in the show can’t be bothered? Maybe they’re all aware of how shitty it is or maybe they’re lazy, but it doesn’t make sense. 

I’m always interested to see the difference in an “algorithm-free” setting and one that has an algorithm. I always figured Google was the same for everyone, but seeing the difference in articles you’ve outlined is insane. It really just goes to show that Jared isn’t the star that his stans think he is. He’s not as important as they think he is, he’s just an actor.  It’s even more jarring to see just how little Walker is talked about at all. All of my devices probably have been “contaminated” when it comes to algorithm so I can’t really speak personally about the public and fans talking about Walker or not talking about it. I can say that on the posts about Walker from the Supernatural Facebook page, a good chunk of the comments are people saying they stopped watching, never got into it, or thought it was trash. There are only a handful of comments talking about how they enjoy the show. 

I think it was disgusting for him to use a fan’s passing for publicity. And no, I don’t think it was anything other than a PR stunt. Her family had a GFM going that was promoted by plenty of the case INCLUDING GEN, so you know he knew about it. But for him to make his own special one and then have articles posted everywhere about how charitable he is? That’s gross PR bullshit and I hope it backfires. 

I still follow a few Supernatural fans, Jared fans, Jensen fans, etc. on Tumblr and even they aren’t mentioning it. I think maybe the hardcore Jared stans post gifsets or whatever, but I don’t see much praise for the show itself, just Jared’s looks. Even the fans aren’t biting and that would make me reevaluate everything if I was Jared. 

I'm expecting "Jared Padalecki defecates regularly" tomorrow. This made me laugh way too hard!

who knows he and his forehead may wish to have a final crack at films You are on a ROLL!  Maybe I’ve become biased, but I can’t see Jared doing films. I mean, I could see him doing like a side character role or something small, but I can’t see him having a big part of a movie. Like I said, maybe that’s me being biased but I see him staying in TV. I could be proven wrong, but I don’t know. 

I agree about Jared being boring on SM. I used to get some giggles from his Twitter posts and even some of his early IG posts because they were goofy, clever, and candid. It showed his humor and was more personable. Now it’s just all fake and comes off as someone whose only motivation to engage with fans is money and that’s a big turn off. 

For me personally, I think that if instead of the “couple goals” bullshit that they try to push for their lavish trips, if they just posted cool pictures they took of different locations, activities, food or whatever, that would be more palatable than all the “Look at my hubster and I! We’re in Italy! Look at how in love we are!” But maybe that’s because I’ve become a bit of a photography nerd? 

I guess time will tell whether or not Jared will make positive changes and if Walker can be saved, but I’m not really optimistic about it. 

I AM optimistic about your takes on things so keep them coming! Long posts or not, I love them! <3

[dnarez]

In Need Of Help

Summary:

Pro hero Shinso is in need of more evidence to get a crazy man that has been eating pieces of people, he would do anything for some help.

[This is a gift for my followers in all platforms, forgiving me so much views, kudos, votes and followers in all my accounts, I'm very thankful for everything, so here's a little something]

...

His heels clicking on the pavement and a nearby bar was the only things that were making noise on that, cold and dark night.

Shinso knew that he shouldn't be there, even if now he was a licensed Pro Hero, he needed this, only one more information, one last victim, one small proof, and the case would be over.

That damn monster that lurks around every hour of the day would be behind bars, but for that to happen, for the victims to be able to sleep without a care in the world, he needed to do this, he needed to be here.

Here, in the middle of nowhere, with no backup, and cross dressing.

Someone, a monster, had been eating people, but only bits of them, the Thing would cut a piece of the victims body, sometimes a few pieces, normally from the legs or the arms. It didn't matter if you were woman or man, the Thing loved juicy and savory meat. By what the victims told him, they would be sedated on the area and cut open, the 911 would be called by their own cellphone, and a voice would ask for help, they probably used a voice modifier.

The Thing was described as a big and scary humanoid lizard, with golden scales all over their body, by the looks of it, the Thing was a male, but Shinso thought otherwise, he thought about what the victims said that happened before the attacks, sometimes a person would call for help, others were tapped on their shoulder, some were asked directions or the time, and others were asked if they wanted to have some "fun". But from all those times a female voice was permanent, the police said that it could be the work of two people, but that seemed very unlikely, since every single one of those victims said that it was only one voice, only one monster.

And now Shinso was walking around dressed as a woman, going through the almost empty streets, since most of their victims were female, he decided to make himself an easier bait.

'From 999 victims more than 80% were women, I hope this works'

By using a tight fit sweater like dress, some leggings, a wig and some make up Shinso looked just like any other women going home late at night

'I can't be too confident' he curved his body around the purse, looking down to the ground and trying to walk fast through the dark streets.

When walking by the bar some drunk men whistled and grabbed his arm "Come on sweetie we can have some fun with each other, why don't you look at me?"

The smell of cheap beer was sickening, but Shinso couldn't drop the act and punch that man's face, so he started to struggle against the drunk, with a choker that modified his voice to of a female, he said "LET ME GO!" The high pitched voice echoed throughout the empty street.

The drunk man pulled him closer, since Shinso was using heels he lost his balance and couldn't pull his arm from the man's grasp, who started to grope his ass "Ooooh! What a nice ass! You must go to the gym, come on~ I just want to have some fun with you baby"

"I said-!"

Suddenly the grip on his ass and arm was released, a humanoid dragon with golden scales, horns coming from their hair and was 5 meters tall held the drunk by his neck.

Shinso looked shocked at their size.

"The lady told you to let her go" the sweet and feminine voice didn't fit that thing.

The drunk was put on the floor, she glared at him "get out of here before I change my mind" he run back to the bar.

Shinso was still in shock looking at her "Y-you..."

The humanoid picked up his purse and gave it back to him.

"Y-you-... I-I-I..." Shinso sighs and calm himself down "thank you!" He smiled at her, and see she smiles back.

"Do you need help? This place is always a dessert at this hour, I can take you to your home"

'Bingo!' Hitoshi has to hold himself to not smile in victory "I don't want to bother you!" He says with a sickly sweet voice, and looks away playing that he's a shy girl.

"It won't be a bother, two women waking around is better than one alone, I know my way around here pretty well, why don't you tell me where you live so that I can take you there."

He nods and tells a hotel address.

"Oh! I'm also staying there! What floor you are in?" The tip of her tail is sawing lightly

"3rd floor"

She gasps and puts her hand on her chest "Me too! Let's go! You must be tired!"

He nods and smiles.

They walk side by side, but then she huffs and looks at the sky "I can take you there faster if we fly, I'm too lazy to walk" she picks him up with her tail around his waist and puts him on her shoulders.

"W-wait!" But she doesn't listens, and her size gets bigger, now she's 11 m.

With too much easiness you, the dragon humanoid, fly up in the air, over the city.

He holds tight to your horns, wait... the victims told them that it was a lizard looking person, the Thing could distort their voice, he just-... he got the wrong person, as you glide through the sky his wig fly away, he shrieks, panicking.

You laugh at him "You should have used that weird hair glue man"

"Y-you knew!?" He looks at you surprised.

"Of course! Your natural body odor can't be hidden by a mere cheap perfume"

Shinso blushes heavily. "I'm sorry I confused you with the cannibal that is running around eating people" he looks down at your scales and is impressed by their glow.

"You're not the first cutie, now why don't you tell me your name?"

Hitoshi covers his face with one hand. "You can call me MindJack, it's my hero name"

You nod and shook yourself "hold on, I'm gonna dive!" He holds tightly on your horns as you nose dive till you were next enough from the building you transform to a smaller dragon when you land on the roof. "You can let go now"

He releases you and step back, but falls on his ass since he was using heels.

"Hey... your cute!" You get close to his face, close enough that he can feel your breath.

Blushing heavily he gets up and nods to her "Thank you but I-" he notices he's necklace activated and turns it off "Thank you, but I have to go" your face lights up when you hear his voice "I really need some evidence on that guy".

"I can help you then" you state simply

"What!? NO! You are a civilian, how can you help me?" Hitoshi crosses his arms

"Because, my dear pro hero, you are trying to capture my good for nothing brother" you start pacing around him, about 2 m of distance.

"How do I know that you're saying the truth?" Shinso squint his eyes at you "you could very well be lying"

You nod, stopping in front of him "I can show you where he puts the meat that he doesn't eat"

"I thought he ate all of it"

You shook your head "He likes to put it away, like a prize, know what I'm saying?"

Shinso nods "let's go to the police station and-"

You flare up at that, now a pose extremely intimidating, with your wings open and tail waving around, nervous. "I think the fuck not! You are going to find that place alone if you want the police involved!"

"NO! Please! That monster is already in his 999 victim!"

She squints at him "no police, and no other pro heroes, I'm not found of that type"

He nods quickly, this is the only lead they got in the last 4 years, but something has been bugging him "Where is he right now? He didn't eat no one the last 2 weeks."

"He's waiting, he wants the people to be less aware at night, it is his last victim, he wants a whole person this time"

Hitoshi gulps "Where is he?"

"Don't know" you shrug "but since people are back at the streets at night he will be back in-" you stop and look at the moon, figuring out the time "in a few hours, maybe 5 or 6"

That put the pro hero on edge "what will he do when he gets back?"

You think for a bit and goes back to pacing around him "probably sleep, call me, and when the night falls he will go out and take his 1000 victim" you stop by his side this time "but I can help you~"

Shinso stops and things about it for a bit, if what she's saying is true then someone will be eaten alive that same shitty day. "And how exactly are you going to help me?"

"That's easy! I will put something for him to sleep on his morning juicy, he will sleep, I tie him up, and give him to you, with also his address so that you can take all the evidence necessary"

"You can't put someone to sleep and delivery it to me!"

"Yes I can, I will be his 'last victim' and say that I thought he would kill me, so you will just tell the cops that you came and rescued me from him, TCHARAM! What do you think about that?"

Hitoshi stops in his tracks, the cold midnight air on his skin makes him shiver from cold. "But what do you want in return? It's impossible that you are doing this just because you want to help, if you wanted to help you would have at the beginning of his attacks"

You nod at him and stops by his side, enveloping him with a wing, looking him up and down "You are right, I want something- no... I want someone, I want to have some fun... with you" you gently grab him by his chin "It's cold, let's go inside, so I can get my payment" you put your hand on his ass and nudge him to the roof door.

"W-wait! I didn't agree to this!" You stop and look at him amused.

"Oh! So you have another choice? That's news to me, since you didn't have enough option to not dress up as a woman" you gently hold the hem of his dress with a finger.

Hitoshi trembles, now realizing that you are right, if he wants your much-needed help he will... have to sell his body. "B-but I never-!" Shinso blushes, hard.

You laugh mocking him"You are a virgin!? How old are you? 25? 24? That's gold! Well... for me" when you pass the door and start going down the stairs with a hand on his lower back, you also take that time to transform in to your human form, with only small horns, a thin tail and small wings visible.

You look like a succubus to him, but the normal clothing doesn't match the lustful look on your eyes.

...

Opening the door to your bedroom and pushing him in with you was easy.

He sits on the bed and take off his heels as he watches you walking around. "How is this going to go?" Shinso feels small, like when people called him a villain in his youth.

Hitoshi was thinking of how he's an idiot for not taking his capture weapon with him, and even if he did, he realizes that it would be useless right now, but having it would be some kind of comfort.

You see him lost in thoughts, fumbling with his fingers, he's so cute! Even if he's tall for a man, he's small to you, as you walk around the room and go to the bathroom to get the bath ready, you hear soft steps walking to you.

"Don't you want something else?" When you look at him, he doesn't meet your eyes, he looks even smaller right now, hugging himself, in clear discomfort.

"I'm a doctor, I don't need money, I don't want fame or exposure, nor do I want anything that you may have... well, besides your body" you chuckle and start stripping.

Hitoshi blushes and closes his eyes. "I-I can find you someone better, maybe another pro hero, I was a classmate with some of the top 10 heroes, maybe yo-"

"Don't want it" you say like it was obvious "I don't like heroes in general, you are the first one that I feel attracted to" you walk to him and get smaller, now you're just a little taller than him, his sight is directly at your breast, but sadly he's eyes are closed. "Do you need help, or you can take your clothes off yourself?"

Shinso shivers from just thinking about her passing her hands over his body "I can do it!" He tries to keep his voice strong.

"So go on" you sit at the border of the big bathtub "give me a nice show will you?"

He looks at your naked form still blushing and then looks at the bathtub "aren't we just going to fuck? Why do I have to take a bath?"

"You are too feminine right now, don't get me wrong I love a woman in my bed, but right now I'm hungry for some masculine men at my feet and losing control" you put something on the water and mix it with your hand.

Taking a shaky breath he starts to get undressed. Shinso is disgusted at himself, selling his body to a random woman who says she is the attacker's sister, but... he has no other lead to that Thing, this is the last hope. So Hitoshi takes a deep breath and start to taking the dress off, he never thought that this would be his first time... he wanted to be with a lover or at least a friend that took pity on him, not this... in a run down hotel, with a stranger that says they have a lead. Being a hero sure sucks.

"Hmmmm, what a nice body!" He looks at your back and sees your thin tail make a heart shape "now the pants and underwear at the same time"

With a shuddering breath he takes them off, covering his dick with his hands feeling exposed under your eyes.

"Now come here, I want to feel you"

He obeys now in front of you, as you stay sat on the bath border.

You take his hands in yours and smile "we can stop this at any moment, you can go on without losing your virginity to me" Shinso sighs relieved and smiles down at you "but of course, I won't tell you anything or help you an all" his smile drops and a frown takes place, he shook his head, and you lick your lips at that. "Now let's start to clean you, the fun will begin soon enough"

You hold his hand and get inside the bathtub, pulling him with you as you sit down.

Shinso stays a little far from you, but you're still holding his hand.

Taking deep breaths and relaxing was good and all, but you wanted more, so you pulled him closer and kissed him.

The hero did not pull back, and instead kissed you back, that made you eager, as you licked his bottom lip asking for entrance, Shinso started having doubts, so he didn't open his mouth, well. Until he felt you grabbing his balls and massaging it, gasping in surprise was enough for you to start a full tongue kiss.

He grows and whimpers against your mouth, he turns you on so much! Maybe you should keep him, but let's see if at the end he will be your good boy or a damn pro hero.

He's dick start to get hard from you massaging his balls, and the kiss is getting louder from all the saliva, that may also be turning him on, it's the first time someone else touches him there.

Your tongue is bigger and longer than an average one, is also pointy and very flexible, so it's easy to wrap yours around his one, and you suck it, at that he moans, you separate the kiss to let him breath, and the face he makes is incredible, making you extremely turned on, damn this man is going to be your end.

"So cute, so sweet!" You day, and he gasps air and hold your hand when you squeeze his balls lightly.

"Please... that's enough... I should go and- AAAAHG!" he shouts surprised by the feeling of something on his nipple, but your arms didn't move, one was behind his shoulder holding his neck from behind, and the other fondling with his balls, so what-

Looking down he saw the tip of your tail, it was a straight tip, no heart or anything, just like a snake's tail, it was doing circles on his nipple, with just enough pressure to turn him on.

"You are so sensitive! Do you pinch your nipples when you masturbate?"

"What!? No- AAAAAHG!" his hips jerks, you had suddenly licked his nipple.

"Don't lie to me~♡ they wouldn't be this sensitive if you never touched them" taking his nipple in your mouth and sucking it has Shinso growling.

"YES! I do pinch my nipples when I masturbate!"

You hum with his nipple in mouth making him whimper at the vibration, he moves his hand to try and alleviate himself a little, but your hand that was on his balls is faster, grabbing his dick and jerking it with enthusiasm.

That has Hitoshi on cloud nine, with the tail now wrapping around his balls and moving Itself without stopping, your mouth sucking and licking his nipple, one hand on the back of his neck caressing him, and the other masturbating him. It was too much, Hitoshi never felt like this, it was overwhelming the amount of pleasure he was feeling, all of this brought him to the edge quickly.

"I-I'm... I'm gonna! Ah! Ah! More! Just a little more!" He close his eyes but as soon as the sensation came from the orgasm, it went away he shouts, throwing his head back frustrated and opens his eyes, desperately pumping his own dick trying to cum, but you stop him and kiss his knuckles.

He looks at you, with an open mouth and relaxed slutty eyes trying to focus on you. "Please... please let me cum!"

You chuckled at that and kissed his lips "sorry MindJack, but only good boys can cum, pro heroes can't, and since you told me your pro hero name and not your real one, I can't let you cum" you pout at the idea of your new toy not cumming "I will give you a prize if you tell me your name" wrapping your hand around his dick and pumping it slowly.

But reason was louder inside Hitoshi's mind, it didn't let him tell his name, it would be too dangerous for him, so he shook his head.

You sighed disappointed but nodded "it's okay, you're here to make me feel good, so I will let that one thing slip, but if you ever change your mind just tell me"

He took in a deep breath and nodded, getting ready for your next move.

You sit in between his legs an open them, looking directly at his butt hole you tilt your head to the side "Have you ever stick something in your ass?"

At that he blushes hard and shook his head "No-! I-I never put anything there"

"Well... now you will" you wink at him and submerge in the water, with his dick in hand you put your tongue on his asshole, he's hips jerk in surprise, so you use your other hand to keep them from moving.

The sensation was weird and uncomfortable, he could feel you tongue slithering inside his asshole, the unwelcomed sensation made his dick start to go soft, but you jerk him off, so that he would relax on your tongue, and focus on something else.

Shinso looked at you underwater and was surprised by how little the bubbles got out of your nose, maybe your quirk had something to do with that? The jerking of his dick got faster, making him focus totally on that, as a result you went deeper with your tongue on his inside, and by moving around he could feel like you were searching something, but his dazzled mind could only focus on your hand that was holding his hips now going up and pinching his nipple, he grows at that and whimpers as you press your nails on it from time to time.

The warm feeling on his lower stomach came back, the built-up coming a little faster this time around, but it skyrocketed as you hit his prostate, making him moan loudly with a surprised yep.

"I'M... GONNA CUM!" Even if you were underwater you heard him, you already knew that he was at the edge of an incredible orgasm, since his walls were trembling around your tongue, his dick pulsating in your hand and his hips moving, trying to get more of you inside him.

When his eyes started to turn to inside his head, mouth lightly open with gasps and whimpers, he was almost there, just a little bit, just a little bit, just a- "NO!" He sobs as you stop everything at once and sit up on the tub.

He's sobbing like crazy, trembling all over from another orgasm being ripped from him, this one was so big too, he could feel that it would be one of the bests in all his life.

You purr at him and pets his head softly, kiss his cheek and the tip of his nose, hugging him from the side, he hides his face at the crook of your neck and his sobs stop after a while.

Shinso sighs, trembling in disgust from how well he responds to your touches, your hands feels so good running through his hair and his body, your cat like purr comforts him to no end, everything about you feels so welcoming... 'what the fuck is happening to me?'

...

After washing his face from the makeup and cleaning your own body he sits at your feet while you sit on the chair in front of your computer, without bothering to put clothes on or tell him to dress himself, it won't be needed.

"Right now I need to check some emails, so you'll go down on me if you do a good job I can get you some early evidence" you finish drying your body and spread your legs to him and start reading emails.

Hitoshi saw enough porn in his life that he knows what to do, pulling himself closer to her pussy and opening his mouth was an incredible view to you.

Starting with shy cat licks, you sigh in comfort and pets his head, going tight back to typing.

With a little more confidence that you gave him through the head pats he starts to savor you, his tongue licks for longer each time, and he feels the little button against it.

Your cellphone starts ringing making him stop his ministrations, but you gently nudge his cheek "don't stop, and be careful with your teeth" you answer your phone, and he goes back to liking you, now you were wetter than before, maybe you like the risk of being caught.

Shinso sucks lightly on your clit and sees you smiling at him with adoration "Yeah I refused her... I know, but I can refuse someone whenever I want" you sigh relived when he starts to get the hang of it. "Not my problem, I told you that I don't like heroes, and I also told you that even if it was an emergency I wouldn't attend them.... that was because I didn't knew he was a hero... that one was a vigilante... of course they are differeEEENT!" you look at him shocked, Hitoshi put his tongue inside you and was purposely rubbing his nose on your clit "hmmmmm... yeah sorry, I almost tripped...no no I'm- mmmmmmmmh! I'm fine... yeah? Well... then sue me, I don't care" you hung up the call and patted your thighs "hands where I can see MindJack"

Shinso puts his hand on top of your thighs, and you can feel pre-cum on one hand and a bit of it also on the tip of his other hand "Oh! So you did like my tongue on your back door!" You interlace your fingers with his hair and lightly pull on it making him groan, the vibrations hit you just right "ooooh~! Right there baby... such a good little hero, getting me nice and wet so that I can eat your cock with my pussy" that has Shinso moaning against you, you moan back at him and goes back to answering emails, but still gasping and moaning from time to time.

By the looks of it he's getting more clumsy and desperate by now, he starts to eating you aggressively, and it starts to turn you off, so you pull him away from your pussy "enough, you can't make me cum with your mouth, but don't worry, since this is your first time it's normal to not get it right hero"

Hitoshi sighs and calm his breathing, he grab both your thighs and look up at you with such a deplorable face that has your inside heating up.

"Hmmmmm~♡ what do you want my little hero?" You put your thumb in his mouth, and he sucks on it "want to have something wrapped around your dick like there's no tomorrow? Tell me what you want, and I will give it to you" you close your laptop and focus on him, Hitoshi trembles under your eyes.

"I want to lose my virginity... please" he says with your finger in his mouth.

You chuckle at his face "How adorable, you never asked my name and still want to fuck me, how dirty of you, does it turn you on not knowing my name?" You put your feet on his dick and start to rub him.

"Name... I want to know your name, I want to cum saying your name"

Your smile grow darker "then tell me yours" Shinso stops all his thinking again, looking at her surprised, he shakes his head, you huff and nod "Okay, okay, well... right now you can call me doctor, or doc, when you tell me your name I will tell you mine" you get up from the chair and goes through your purse "lay down on the bed, let's get started, you can sleep here, tomorrow we will do all that hero stuff"

Hitoshi goes and sit on the bed with his back to the headboard, both hands on his thigh, his dick pulsating with an almost purple head, and and pulsating against his stomach.

You come back with a butt plug and lubricant, you open his legs and lick your lips at the sight "this one is small so don't worry too much" you spread the lubricant on his dick and then down to his asshole "I'm glad that I put aphrodisiac in the water, you needed to relax"

"You did what!?" When you were about to fit your finger inside he tensed the muscle, making it impossible for you to enter

You huff "I just wanted you to relax, don't worry I didn't put enough to make you unconscious or unable to say no, you can still get up and go out, I will even call and pay for the cab" you sit back and point to the door.

"But I need your help!"

"That's a shame, because I just want your body, I don't actually want to help, but I will if I can get what I want, now decide, will you go, or can I keep going?" You point to the door and then at his genitals.

Hitoshi looks in despair at you, his big and strong arms and legs, or his pro hero training, even his experience, nothing was usable here, even if he used his quirk, it wouldn't work, since he can't make her write the culprit's name. Hitoshi Shinso, the student of UA, the pupil of Eraser head, MindJack, the pro hero that helps the top 10 heroes under the table, is unable to help himself, and unable to not need your help.

You see that he noticed all this in a few minutes, that powerful man under you, makes you wet enough to make your slick come down to your inner thighs.

"Please... keep going" Hitoshi says in defeat, and you gladly oblige, you put your mouth around his tip and lightly suck on it, the pro hero groans, the feeling being out of this world, now relaxed and focusing on your mouth you put two lubricated fingers on his asshole, and slowly going more and more in, until only your knuckles are outside it.

The feeling of your fingers now moving around was groundbreakingly good, you were so sweet with him, even if this was supposed to pleasure you, maybe you like to be in control? That's possible-!!! Hitoshi yelp loudly by how surprised he is, you took him all inside your mouth, and he isn't small! And you just deep throated him, your wet and warm cave has him trembling from head to toe, while moaning loudly, not being able to hold back his moans.

"I-I'm gonna cum! Please let me cum! Please!" He says with tears in his eyes yet to fall.

But again you stop taking him out of your mouth, when he's at the edge almost cumming, Hitoshi sobs, his hands that was holding his own thighs are trembling as he holds himself back.

"Sorry, I need your name if you want to come" with your finger spreading his asshole, you kiss his tip again, it was pulsating with an almost purple head and pre-cum coming out of it.

"I won't give you my nAME!" you not only put the lubricated butt plug inside him, but also turned on the little vibrator, by the small switch that your tail was holding out of his reach.

"I already told you that it's fine, that you just won't cum" you get up and squad on top off him, lining his dick at your lower lips, and start to rub his tip on your clit, that makes you shiver and breathe heavily, thinking about what will happen next.

"Wait! A condom! I don't know if you are clean, and I also am too young to be a father!" He holds your hips up, not letting you keep going.

You sigh and get up, going to your purse and coming back with a paper and shows it to him. "What it says right here?" You point at a specific part and put the paper very close to his face, so he can't read the rest

"STDs negative, AIDS negative and other sickness that I don't know the name off, all of them negative..." you make a ball with the paper and trows it at the trash can, and you got it right... maybe that's a signal, that you will succeed this time.

"But what if- hummn!" You press on the butt plug and chuckles at him trying to hold back his moan

"It's a safe day, and I'm on the pill" you pet his face and goes on top of him again "now lay down and let your doctor give you your medicine"

He gulps and lays down, you fluff his pillow under him and smiles, his face blushing from how much care you have on your eyes, there is something more, like the cat that got the cream, but he isn't sure, that look vanish, being replaced by a lustful look.

You again line you two, and when you sit on him, taking every inch you both moan in sync.

"Oh my god!" You think that this hero is the cutest, he does the best facial reactions you have ever seen, it's quite addictive, but when you start to move, Oh! The face he makes is the best one.

"Don't stop- please! I'm gonna cum!" He throws his head back but groans in frustration from you not only stopping the movement, but also stopping the vibrator.

"Your name?" You ask again, putting a hand on his chest and caressing his nipple with your thumb.

His conscience was screaming at him, but his body was screaming for release.

You see his body twitching under you, the feeling of his dick inside you was deliciously pulsating, you wig your hips "Come oooon~ tell me! Tell meee~" you give small jumps and wiggle your hips.

He groans at the feeling, his whole body begging for release, "Hitoshi! My name is Hitoshi Shinso!!"

You smile at him and starts to move, "Hitoshi-kun! Cum inside me! Please! Please! Please!" At that he snaps and hold your hips up, as he fucks into you.

"Name!? Please! Please doctor!" You turn on the vibrator, and he moans loudly like a woman.

"Y/n call me, Y/n-sama, since I'm older than you, you need to uUuuUuUse~ aaaahn~♡, Hitoshi-kun! Give me more! Please!"

He moans back to you, seeing you on top of him, your breasts bouncing, was extremely arousing, but looking closely, your horns starts growing with your wings and size, your dragon scales are back but only in a few places.

You are meeting his trusts half way, your pleasure is building up, when suddenly it skyrockets, you look down at him and sees that his hand went up to your back, he's holding on your wings and pulling it from time to time, which makes you desperate, moving up and down you lost the patience when you started going over the edge.

"Toshi! I'm gonna cum!" your tail flicks the vibration to the max and drops the switch, coming to press and nudge your little button.

It was too much for him, the vibrations from behind hitting his prostate, your gummy walls squiring him so tight, the way your body moves with his, and the way you call, for his name is so sweet that he couldn't hold back even if he wanted, so he came inside you, his hot cum was the trigger for you too.

...

Waking up on the next day was a nightmare, his body was exhausted and his mind slower than normal, so after a few minutes Shinso sat up on the empty bed and looked around.

Your things weren't on the room anymore, some masculine clothes were on top of a chair with a note.

Hitoshi took a while to notice, but he was surprised when he did, not only was his body clean, it was just tired, and not sore, even a little relaxed, after reading the letter it made sense, and he sighs while holding back a smile.

'Hope you liked your post-sex massage, pro-heroes need their bodies on the daily, also...

It would be bad if we couldn't take my brother down, lets me up again today, yes?'

XoXo L/n Y/n

[angst-fairygodmother]

Sorry to bother you, but if you've got the time can I maybe get either Angst #1: "I can't do anything right" or Random #25: "It's 6 o'clock in the morning, you're not having vodka" with Klaus x Reader please? I feel like you could do something super cute with them, unless you don't want to. Whatever you're feeling.

A/N: Your prompts gave me a strong hurt/comfort feeling. So I just...stuck the knife in, wiggled it around a bunch, kicked the poor boy while he was down, and let the reader clean it up. Please enjoy. Word Count: 1941 Rating: M - self-hatred/negative thoughts/depression, alcohol mention, reference to past drug use, reference to PTSD, reference to death, spoilers for The Umbrella Academy season 1

A loud crash from the front of your apartment woke you with a start. Gripping the small but shocking heavy clock from your nightstand, you cautiously padded down the hall toward the noise. Absently, you thought about the fact that you had left a kitchen window open and hoped that whatever was making the sound was just a possum or other easily caught creature wandering in from the fire escape, rather than someone. Another thump caused your heart to race as you rounded the corner.

The figure in your kitchen screamed and you heard the thump of something heavy hitting the floor. With a groan, you flicked on the light and glared at your best friend, though you were reconsidering the title as you inspected the mess he had made by breaking in and rooting through your cabinets in the dark.

“What the fuck Klaus?” you said with a sigh.

“Oh! Y/N! You’re up!” his voice was strained and too loud for the hour, you could tell something was off.

“Yes. Funny that, what with the amount of noise you were making.”

“Sorry,” scrunched up his face. “I was trying to be quiet but…you know me.” He continued to nose around in your cabinets until he made a small noise of victory and pulled out what he was looking for.

“Yeah I do.” You saw the bottle in his hand and frowned. “Put that back.”

“I’m just going to have one little glass…”

You glanced down at the timepiece still in your hand before setting it on the counter.

“It's 6 o'clock in the morning, you're not having vodka.” You pulled the bottle out of his hand before he could protest.

“Pleeeeeease. I need it. I need something.” His whine seemed unusually desperate, even for him and you finally really looked at him. Quickly you recognized both a very different outfit than you had ever seen him in before, particularly the green army vest and new tattoo on his arm, and the tell-tale signs of withdrawal in every part of his body and behavior.

“Sobriety with no rehab?” you asked, incredulous.

“It’s a long story, and I’d rather not talk about it,” he sighed. “I just want to forget it and move on.”

“By going straight back to the bottle?”

“Yes,” he snatched at it and you held it just out of reach, placing your small dining table between the two of you to counteract his height advantage.

“No.”

He gave you his best pout and you almost surrendered before you caught yourself.

“How about instead, I make some breakfast and we talk?”

“I told you, I don’t want…” he trailed off, voice cracking at the end, and when you looked at him again his eyes were glassy and unfocused, not really present anymore. His whole body trembled. You suspected that he was being bombarded by ghosts, as tended to happen on his rare sober occasions, and felt guilty for giving him a hard time. You set the bottle aside and circled to stand in front of him.

“You okay there?” you asked, trying to keep your voice light. He remained silent and distant.

Gently, you cupped his face between your hands, trying to pull his focus to you. His hands came up to wrap around your wrists, shaking and frighteningly cold, the war between shoving you away and clinging to any connection he could get plain.

“Klaus?” you asked softly, tilting your head to one side. He didn’t seem to register your voice. “Klaus please talk to me…”

He opened his mouth as if to speak and then closed it again, his eyes now roving your face as if searching for something. Suddenly, he collapsed forward into a sob, leaning heavily on you as you wrapped your arms around his head and shoulders. You slowly guided the pair of you down into a sitting position, your back against the fridge and Klaus practically in your lap.

His behavior scared you. You had seen many wild mood swings from your best friend, usually on account of whatever drug he was using to dull his powers that week or the withdrawals of coming down off them, but you had never seen him like this before. Your heart ached at the pitiful noises he made, and you rocked him gently, humming a soft tune and trying your best to comfort him.

You weren’t sure how long you sat with him on your kitchen floor, staring at the jar of pasta sauce that he had dropped when you surprised him. Long enough that the light of dawn was spilling through the window, little puddles of light dancing around you. Long enough that your shoulders ached from your position, not that it mattered to you compared to his hurt. Long enough that you were surely late for work and your pajama top was stained with eyeliner and tears. Long enough that you wondered absently how he hadn’t run out of tears or breath yet.

Eventually, the body-wracking sobs softened to little hitches of breath and then, even later to silence. You continued to sit there, holding him close, shifting only enough to run soothing fingers through his hair.

“I can't do anything right,” he admitted, voice hoarse and muffled by the fact that his face was still pressed into your shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“Woah, hey. Where is this coming from?” you asked, frowning, puzzled and concerned.

“I’m a giant screw up. Everything I touch, I ruin.”

“That’s not true, Klaus.” You tried leaned down and back, trying to get him to look at you. “Talk to me?”

What followed was a bewildering accounting of his last forty-eight hours, or ten months, depending on your perspective. He told you about how he had been kidnapped because he was too high to notice the assassins in the Academy trying to kill his family. He described the torture, voice trembling, in detail that made you sick and made your grip tighten on him as if you could retroactively protect him, how he’d caved and told the two about the biotech company that Five had been staking out.

“I’m the reason Diego’s girlfriend is dead,” he said sullenly. “I got her attention, made her come into the room trying to save me. And then when she did, I ran like a coward. Didn’t even warn her that there were two of them.”

You flinched. You had heard about Detective Patch, seen how broken Diego was over it. But she was a police officer, doing her job, and Klaus was hardly to blame for the fact that he had taken the opportunity to escape his torturers, or that she had gone to the motel without backup. Not that he would listen if you tried to tell him that, and he would probably clam up and not finish even though he clearly had more to say. So instead you stayed silent and let him carry on.

What he said next left you stunned, as he admitted to travelling back in time, to fighting in the Vietnam war and falling in love with a man called Dave. And then Dave had been shot during a battle and though he’d pressed his hands over the wound and called desperately for a medic, he’d failed to save him. And now he was back in the present having flashbacks to bombs going off around him in addition to the withdrawal and the ghosts everywhere. And he couldn’t even conjure Dave.

“One more thing I can’t do right.” He laughed bitterly. “Can’t get Dad either, no matter how many times Luther asks me too. Even the one useful thing I can do, I can’t get it right.”

He was silent for a moment, and you thought with relief that he might be done berating himself and you could speak. Unfortunately, as you gathered your thoughts and went to start, he continued, now talking about Five’s return and how he said the world was going to end.

“Five hopes that with the ‘full force of the academy’ we can stop it from happening, but I wouldn’t hold my breath. And before you ask why I’m not with my family then trying to help, it’s not like talking to ghosts is helpful here. So I just, bailed. Like I always do.”

At some point during the conversation, he had finally pulled away from your embrace and leaned beside you against the cold metal appliance. He looked over at you, eyes soft and full of an unfamiliar expression, before he cast them down to stare at his hands folded in his lap.

“Christ, I can’t even protect the one person I have left that matters,” he muttered, utterly defeated.

“Three days, huh?” you asked tentatively.

“Mhm. That’s what he said. Yesterday. So it’s actually probably closer to two.”

“Alright. Well, I’ve always wanted to see the Roman Coliseum. But that might take too long to get to, waste a whole day on air travel. We could…go to Vegas, blow all my savings on…hookers and slot machines…?”

“What are you doing?” He stared in confusion.

“Trying to make a plan for how to spend the last days of our lives?”

He cracked a small smile. “And you settled on slot machines and Vegas hookers?”

“Well I don’t know. I’ve never thought about…what I’d do if I knew I was going to die soon…I’d just, I want to spend the last few days with someone I love.” You shrugged. “But it got you to smile, so…I call it a win.”

He shook his head ruefully, warm expression widening. “Y/N, you are, amazing.”

You smiled back at him.

“For real though, you are not just a screw up, Klaus,” you said fiercely. “You are my best friend and you mean the world to me. And even if you’ve made mistakes, that doesn’t negate that you are so full of light, and so genuine even when you try to hide it. You see the best in everyone else, and the people that care, care about you because of everything you are, good and bad. I’m sure if this Dave were here, he’d say the same thing.”

“Yeah,” he sighed. “He probably would. You two are a lot alike actually.”

“I wish I could have met him then, and thanked him for keeping your sorry ass alive so you could come back to me.”

You both laughed. The room settled into a steady, comfortable silence, each of you enjoying the other’s presence and the moment of peace, sneaking glances when you thought the other wasn’t looking.

And then your eyes caught. On an instinct, you leaned almost imperceptibly closer.

“I wish you hadn’t told me yet that the world was ending,” you whispered. “Then I could do this without worrying that you’ll think it’s just because of that, and not the fact that I’ve been in love with you for a while now. There’s no time to do things properly.”

“What did you just say?”

Instead of answering, you pressed your lips to his softly. Stiffening for a moment, you thought he might reject you, but then he relaxed into it, kissing you back with increasing passion and hunger. Gently he cradled your head and laid you back onto the floor, never once breaking contact with your lips.

“Y/N,” he sighed, leaning back to give you both a moment of air. “You’re right. There’s no time to do this properly. There’s no time for anything.”

You smiled up at him, bright and loving. “We don’t need properly, we just need each other.”

He laughed and leaned down to capture your lips quickly. “Right again.”

[crazy-fan-girl-c137]

Happy Birthday (Connor x Reader)

Note: So, I decided to also write a very short, one shot fanfic from DBH fandom because I've been obsessing with it AGAIN. Thank to DE. Haha! Anyway, I had this idea because it's my birthday and that inspired to write this short fic.

To anyone who's also celebrating their birthday today...HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 🎉🎈🎂♥

P.S. Sorry for the bad grammar. English isn't my mother tongue. Also, I am not a writer. I'm an artist. I draw and design stuff. I just really like writing. 😂😂😂

Pairing: Connor x Reader

Word Count: 1,879

Also: L/N = Last Name and N/N = Nickname

~

It's your birthday. But to you, it's just like any ordinary day.

You never told anyone your birthday because you never celebrated it. Not because you hated it, or you're trying to get out of the responsibility of treating your friends for a drink or something. It's just that, you didn't see the point of occasionally celebrating it.

And it wasn't just your birthday that you don't celebrate, even the holidays.

So, despite it being your birthday, you treated the day just like any other work day. Besides, you were too busy finishing all your reports that's due that day. You didn't have time to get distracted because you didn't want Fowler yelling at you again.

It was already late at night. You, and a few other people were the only ones left at the precinct. You just finished typing the last report of the day when someone suddenly tapped your shoulders.

You flinched in shock before you turned your chair to see who it was. "Connor?"

Connor stood in front of you, a large box on his arms. "Happy birthday, detective L/N!"

You stared at him, blinking a few times. You were dumbfounded. "How did you- nevermind." You cut yourself off, reminding yourself that Connor still is an android, despite him turning into a deviant. He probably got that information from your profile.

"Here, open it." He urged like a child excited for their Christmas present, as he handed you the large box.

Despite your tiredness and sleepiness, as soon as you opened the box, you're face lit up. "You didn't." You told him as you pulled out a German Shepherd puppy from the box. "Connor…"

"I've noticed that you always volunteer to look after Sumo when Hank and I are away. And you always stop on your tracks to pet a dog when you're walking outside. I also saw on your social media accounts that you used to have a German Shepherd named Max when you were 12 years old." Connor informed.

"Wow." You chuckled. "You really did your research."

"I wanted to give you the perfect gift."

You almost blushed at his statement. You've been attracted to him ever since you started working as a detective. But you never acknowledge it because you wanted to focus on your work.

But lately, he had been acting kinder and sweeter to you, which makes it difficult for you to ignore you feelings. It makes you wonder…does Connor like me too?

"This is perfect. Thank you, Connor." You replied, giving him a genuine smile.

He stared at you for a few seconds, his LED flickering to yellow, before he finally spoke. "You're welcome, Detective L/N."

"I told you. Just call me N/N."

"N/N." He repeated, the corner of his lips forming a small smile. "What would you name your dog?" He curiously asked.

"I'm not sure yet. Why don't you name it?" You suggested.

You watched as Connor's LED flickered to yellow once more, then back to blue. "What about Happy?"

"Happy." You smiled. "Why Happy?"

"Because I noticed how your mood improved when you saw him. You were happy. He makes you happy."

"You make me happy, Connor." You replied. But your eyes immediately widened as soon as you realized what you just said. "I-I mean-" You stuttered, trying to make your situation less awkward.

But Connor had cut you off. "Seeing you happy makes me happy." He replied with a smile. A real, humanly smile.

And it made your heart flutter as your cheeks finally blush.

"Where's Hank?" You asked, trying to hide your blush as you cradled the puppy on your arms.

Connor's eyes widened as if he was just reminded of something. "Let's go to Jimmy's Bar."

"What?" You looked at him with a confused expression on your face.

"It's your birthday, we should celebrate."

~

You told Connor that you still had to finalize your reports, but he insisted on waiting for you. You didn't want to bother his precious time, so you tried to reason. But after several attempts, and him bring stubborn, you finally gave up.

It only took you about 30 minutes before you finished finalizing your reports and sending it to Fowler. You and Connor finally left the precinct after that, and drove to Jimmy's Bar using your car. You didn't expect anything from there, except maybe having a drink with Connor, even though he's incapable of it.

But when both of you got there, you were surprised to see a crowd of people greeting you; All your close friends at the precinct was present.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" They all yelled as soon as you walked in.

"What…" You were at a loss for words. You were astonished. You never thought this would ever happened to you.

"What? You think you can just go home and not celebrate your own birthday?" Hank teased.

"How did…"

"Connor told us."

You turned to Connor, and he had the goofiest grin on his face. You felt your heart flutter once again, another blush creeping into your cheeks.

Everyone greeted you, coming up to you one by one, and presenting you their own gifts. You almost cried. You never had a birthday party as an adult. The last birthday party you had was when you were still little. You didn't even expect anyone would be throwing a party for you.

And just like a normal birthday party, they had a cake prepared for you to make a wish on as they sing Happy Birthday.

~

You spend the whole night chatting and laughing with your friends, while drinking beers and sharing the large cake they bought for you. And finally, after a few hours of partying, everyone started to go home, wishing one last happy birthday.

It is work night anyways.

It came to a point where it was only you, Hank, Connor and Jimmy was left at the bar.

"Alright. I think I've had enough for the night." Hank announced, standing up from his seat while taking one last sip at his drink.

"Is Connor going to drive you home?" You asked as you walk him out of the bar. Of course, you were concerned for him. He's like a father figure to you. Just like he is to Connor.

"Kid. I always drive home drunk." He replied confidently, making you chuckle. "Where is that android anyway?"

"I think he's discussing something with Jimmy." You replied, pointing back at the bar.

"So, he got you the dog eh?" He asked, scratching the ears of the puppy that you were cradling on your arms.

"Yeah." You smiled, looking down at Happy, a faint blush appearing on your cheeks as it reminded you of earlier events.

"You know, this was all Connor's idea." Hank suddenly said, making you snap your head at him.

Your eyes widened as you stared. "What?" You asked in disbelief.

You thought it was like a group idea. Like all your friends gathered up to make this party happen. You didn't know this was all Connor's.

"He organized all of this. Even paid for everything. Lover boy's got it hard for you." Hank chuckled.

Before you could say anything, Connor came out of the bar, approaching you and Hank.

"Hey, Connor. I was just about to leave." Hank greeted.

"Okay." He nodded. "Is everything alright, N/N?" He asked in concern as he noticed you staring at him with a surprised expression written all over your face.

"I-I'm fine." You replied after a few seconds.

"She's just tired." Hank added, helping you out on your situation. "Get her home safe, will you?"

"Sure, Hank." Connor nodded.

"Alright. I'll see you kids tomorrow. Good night." Hank waved both of you good night as he walked to his car.

"Good night."

~

"Did you like your gift, N/N?" Connor curiously asked as he drove you back to your place.

"I love it." You replied, smiling at him. "Thank you for tonight, Connor."

"You're welcome, N/N."

It wasn't a long ride to your home. You and Connor spent the rest of it in comfortable silence as you listen to whatever was on the radio. And finally, after 15 minutes, you arrived.

Connor walked you to your front door, helping you carry all the gifts you recieved from your friends.

But before you unlock the door, you turned to him and asked, "Why did you do this? I mean, I appreciate it so much. I'm just curious because no one ever done this for me before."

Connor placed down the gifts he was carrying. He didn't respond immediately though. He just stared at you for a while as if he was in deep thought. You watched as his LED turned from blue to yellow and then back to blue.

"Connor?" You asked.

And finally, he replied, "When you first came to the precinct, the moment I first saw you, I felt something that I didn't understand. It was a knew feeling that I've never felt before. I found myself constantly wanting your company, and wanting to make you smile. And when I asked Hank about it, he explained to me that what I was feeling is love. I asked him what love is for a human and he explained it to me. But, it was still a little confusing to me that time, that's why I never said anything to you.

When I found out that it's your birthday, I knew I had to do something special for you. Because that's how humans do it, and because you're special…to me. Then earlier this morning, I realized what Hank was telling me before about love. I now understood what he meant. That's why I knew I have to finally tell you that…I love you."

You felt your heart bursted inside your chest. An overwhelming excitement and happiness filled your emotions. You couldn't help but pull Connor into a kiss. You felt his lips on yours. It was cold but soft.

He didn't move for a few seconds, and you thought he had short circuited. You noticed the light from his LED turning yellow, to red, to yellow, and back to blue. But when you were about to pull from the kiss, his hands slowly snaked it's way from your waist to your back. He pulled you closer to him, deepening the kiss as he finally responded back.

You felt like you were in the old movies. Fireworks exploded inside you. Your heart beat fast and your stomach turned into a knot. His lips was soft against yours, like a delicate butterfly fluttering its wings. It wasn't like anything you felt before.

After a while, you pulled back to catch your breath. A smile creeped on both your faces as you rested your forehead on his.

"Humans said that the first kiss is the best kiss. And I strongly agree with that." He told you, making you chuckle.

"Is this your first kiss ever?" You asked, lightly pulling your face away to take a better look at him.

"It is."

"Well," You replied, planting another soft kiss on his. "it's not going to be the only kiss."

He looked at you, his eyebrows furrowed, LED turning yellow. "What do you mean?" He curiously asked.

"I love you too, Connor."

[voxvulgi]

multiples of 6 - for whoever you think has the best answer including youuuu (you can skip those you don't like xD)

// alright so *cracks knuckles* *puts on accountant hat* *takes out calculator* in 100, the largest multiple of 6 is 96, which has 16 6′s in it. i have 18 muses, but 4 of them are exclusive, so i can stick to the 14 non-exclusive muses and have 2 questions to spare, which i can answer myself

Keep reading

6: do you keep plants? 

“I do. I live alone, so the flat feels dead sometimes. Plants help me feel like I don’t live alone. I do like isolation, but that’s only to a certain extent. Plants are living beings you have to take care of, and they’re a sight for sore eyes, too. I especially like them in the kitchen. When I wake up to make breakfast, the sun is at an angle that pours gold into my kitchen window, and the specific shade of green of their leaves is absolutely gorgeous. I also have a group of small pots to plant thyme and rosemary and such. I could just buy them fresh, but picking your spices yourself every now and again just...engulfs the senses.”

12: what's your favorite planet? 

“When Malik asked me this question and I told him Uranus, he laughed at me for ten minutes straight. At first, he laughed for a few seconds because he thought I was making a joke, but when I told him I was serious, he laughed for the rest of the ten. I really wish scientists just let Uranus be called Ouranos. Did they really not consider that sometime in the future, a girl would tell someone that her favourte planet was your-anus and get laughed at? Rude. But anyway, Uranus is my favourite planet...literally just because it’s pretty. Blue is my favourite colour. Also, it’s the only planet that spins on its side, which was what made me decide that it was more worthy of being my favourite planet than Neptune. Neptune just goes with the flow. Lame, right? Uranus is not like other planets. It’s different. It stays home and eats chicken nuggets instead of going to parties. Also, it was the only planet named after a Greek god instead of a Roman one, and when I found that out, I was like finally, and I just made it my favourite planet.”

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

“I live with my cousins, alright? They own a pub. So, basically, we live upstairs, and the pub is downstairs and open until late. My cousins don’t have a problem with this because they set their won work hours and wake and sleep as they please and all, but I have to attend work with the local herbalist sometimes because she trains me. So, one night, the pub was open well after the usual closing time because some man was getting married in a few days and wanted to celebrate with his friends. I’m not the kind of person to tell people how to live their lives and how late to go to bed, but I was irritated and went downstairs to ask my cousin when this would be over. You know, just so I could get a good idea of when I’ll finally be able to sleep. When I got there, the man to be married was flirting with the barmaid. I would have ignored it, but she looked terribly uncomfortable. I told him off first, and it didn’t work-- obviously. So I went back to my room and gathered some leftover poison ivy powder. I went back downstairs, flirted with him, and unbuckled his belt in front of all his friends. They ooh’ed and ahh’ed because they’re idiots, then I tugged on the back of his waistband and left him with poison ivy all over his arse. I waited until his face twisted and he started drunkenly panicking, then I left. That man didn’t know I’m related to the owners since my cousins are white and all, so there was no harm done to the pub’s reputation, but my cousins and the pub workers -- even the barmaid -- now keep asking me not to hide poison ivy in their pants whenever I look even mildly disapproving.”

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

“I’d trust Alan with every one of my secrets. Except if I do something that isn’t actually worrying but I think might worry him anyway. Because he’s a worrier. That’s not technically a secret.”

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

“Look, I think everyone has been truly scared. There’s always a moment in their life that really scares them, and just because it isn’t as scared as they can psychologically be doesn’t mean it wasn’t true scared. So yes, I have been truly scared. The most scared I’ve ever been was, obviously enough, when I got the phone call from my mother about Joseph.”

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now?

“Branches. They’re upbeat but at the same time make me feel calm and relaxed, which is thankfully my mood in general.”

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

“My favourite coffee shop is a block down from my work. I rarely take work there, usually just buy a coffee and leave or stay for a while and lounge. It’s my favourite because they make the coffee taste how it smells. If coffee doesn’t taste the way it smells, you might as well be drinking mud water. They practically have walls instead of windows, and there’s this terrace on the second floor. It gives you a good view of the street. Looks best in the morning because there’s a park just a street away and people everywhere. The coffee shop itself -- the interior, I mean -- is just clean and tidy. Their seats are comfortable but don’t look like something a wannabe hippie would own. They like their plants in moderation. Their tables are glass, not metal or wood. They don’t have puns or cheesy quotes anywhere. I like that.”

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

“My biggest fear was that a dragon would kidnap my mom and hide her in a tower. I thought and still think that my mom is so pretty! So I figured that if a dragon was going to kidnap someone, it would be my mom. I don’t have that fear now, but I’m...well, I’m really afraid of Jace dying.”

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

“Jenny and Dean last father’s day. Their dad’s already been dead for about a year at that point, but...hell, it’s their dad. I probably looked really sad, too, and he wasn’t even my biological dad.”

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

“I do like poetry. Not big on the older stuff, mostly because of the language barrier. The modern stuff is easier to understand. I actually prefer confessional poetry because it’s like looking into the dark corners of someone’s mind, and not in this romanticised way. Not for me, at least. This certain kind makes me feel seen because when someone shares their experiences from behind their own eyes, in their own shoes, they experience emotions and thoughts that are so raw and human that I feel less alone reading them. I haven’t read that much, to be honest, so I don’t have favourites. I’ve only read the more popular ones that have been coming out in the past decade, so I think picking a favourite is unfair because my pool is so small.”

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? 

“I don’t know. I’ve never worn a flower crown, but I suppose that if I were given one, I’d like for it to have a good amount of leaves along with the flowers. Green is my favourite colour. The flowers can be anything, but I think open ones look better. Maybe daisies-- they sound perfect. Yellows and pinks and reds would be welcome, too, as long as there’s a good amount of white daisies.”

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it?

“I would not say I forget easily, but I note everything down, just in case. Some things are too important to get wrong, while others just cause avoidable inconvenience. It helps me organise my time and prioritise, too, so I just opt for making notes.”

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

“Fanclub! They’re very cute. I only saw them in that movie called Despicable Me. Most of the time, Ivan and I aren’t allowed to use the TV, but it was on one of the days we were allowed, so we watched it. I liked it a lot. The minions are so full of energy and happy and stuff.”

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

“Ooooh, yes!! I’m gonna get a bunch of tattoos! They won’t be anything fancy, though. Just some stars and smiley faces here and there. They’ll all be in colour. Nothing black or white. There’s probably gonna be some small dinosaurs. And music notes. Oh, and rocket ships! I’ll just get a tattoo every time I think of something. They’ll be small. Like, and inch or something, so there’s plenty of room!”

90: talk about one of your favorite cities.

“Paris is my favourite city. The thing about it is...it loves you. That’s how I can describe it. It’s a very old city, okay? A lot of shit went down in it. There were wars and revolutions and all that. I admit that I don’t know much about the historical details because I sucked ass in history class, but I just feel like Paris was founded on fighting, and people fight for their rights and the things they love. So...I think that every building in Paris was made with love and built with a purpose. I don’t like New York because I feel like it just wants to eat you. Paris loves you. I’m very appreciative of that, and I’m appreciative of the buildings most of all. Especially the old ones are gorgeous. I try to incorporate as much of Paris into my architecture models as I could.”

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

“Not really quickly. If I just got on my computer and it tells me it needs to update, I wait until I’m done with my task before I update it. Otherwise, it’ll keep bothering me about it, so I just like to get it over with. Similar thing with my phone. I postpone the update until bedtime then let it update while I sleep. No need to let it disturb the flow of my day, you know? But I’m still gonna do it. I’m not a big procrastinator.”

[the-firebird69]

So we see how this is going I told you not to go over there and not to put your stuff in there I see you're over there taking Jason's stuff out and putting your stuff in and I told you not to I told you you're not living there and you're not moving in and we have your identity and in writing from him and we have it from the police too cuz I called them I said we see her she's taking stuff out and putting her stuff in and drove off of someone else's stuff and I said I'd like you to arrest her those are not her things and she's not to move into a apartment we don't have a lease with her she said someone else signed it and she has no right to be in the apartment not true no one signed anything. So I told him to get out they won't so he's using them cuz he has to I'm telling you with him taking their poison and killing them with it and other people doing that too and really these people little s**** there's snide connivers they call these ass and I comments to get pissed off I'll tell you what I'm pissed off and Im going to do you win Jason

James Bond

I'm good and you do to him sort of floats along in space and he gets picked up and he goes aboard I'm down with ship has a small crew of evil idiots on board and one of them looks just like this idiot who might be Lily and her head comes off and it looks like Jason did it. But I'm not one to complain I don't know what else you can do are you send him the airlock and hit it with a missile or a laser he's so damned annoying this little teeny beaver was useless and if no value is bothering me and nobody seems capable of stopping he and others like him from harassing me to practically death. So until he's gone IE his people are all gone I had to drag him around impose people out using his spectacle. And eventually they'll be gone shortly and in dune he dies. Not sure how it ends up in the museum and I think Chicago that's some a****** probably revive some and it's idiot family which is the size of like I was thing of bananas.

Zues Hera mostly him lol

He goes on to do seven more movies and some dead just as Jeff Bridges get shipped over to Egypt after his movie and you retards to do it to him lol no way okay it's his clones and you're the scapegoat I'm trying to capture our son

So go after them and we figured out something we need more people here I need less you Jason and s*** or nuts what a f****** pile of crap literally we got to cleanse you out of here just like insects we're doing it now can't stand you you're such a little b**** that's why you're dying what was your fat b**** sister are you doing next door is a tragedy it's just like John remillard something 2 weeks of screaming out every few minutes

It took over the banks the last two Citibank finally fell to us and we're going over your records and you people are a mess you don't have the right amounts of people's accounts and people are messing with the computer all the time it is a disaster so was it a few thousand dollars so we went ahead and left it the way it was I'm going to start from there if you want to reconcile it they can go to hell we're going to grab you if you come in and ask the reconcile to make it $1,000 more I'm going to grab you and I'm going to take your stuff I'm going to take your money you're going to hand our son your cash even if it's a billion dollars you can't get it to him we're going to buy stuff from your assholes and use it on them. Seriously did not have you say anything Jason you said I did so i go after you. Been a lot on the docket today the blockade is failing and getting some more idiots and some foreigners and going like that are they going to bring more ships down and over and over until they're out of Star blazers and they are dragging me carcasses away and they're making Jager and trying to get down below and are being intercepted by armies. There are a few things you should know what is Tommy f is not why you poisoning anybody because you're in the way it says it quite frequently you just sitting there on it you're not doing anything and it's bothering him. So he's grabbing your poison we have to compete. Tons of it came out this morning and you plan to use several space stations and poison all over the world and now it's not really going to be that and the sun said to us how does it become this one space station going after just Brazil and that's how. This must be Max in the space shuttles going after you in the movie at the end and you know why it's them because they heard you yelling at them this morning out loud they're all going to die and it's targeted Max and they found a bunch of it in their centers a lot of it and it's meant to go off there not from space and bumps too and they put in your areas and we put the stuff we found in your ears and the clones put their stuff in your areas. And yeah we're happy that you're mad because we hate you don't go over there and bother him means don't go over there and bother him. You're sitting there doing it now so I'm going to come over there and hit you in the head and beat your wife to death first in front of you to show you what you always do. They say we can't get to you but we have tortures and yeah they get to you real quick too. Your going to pay for it the stupid talk you're asking crap any other doctor in Sarasota making her son sick and you and your idiot sister doing it here quite often so I'm going to do it to you

Thor Freya

We said a bunch of the above as well I'm tired of you Jason your stupid face and your dumb mouth and you bothering your son what an a****** you are and a loser we need to do you're a loser huge moron running around telling yourself it took tons of your poison huge lots of it you're going to have hardly anything. 10 balls and that's it and yeah you took everybody else's bombs and you put them in Mac areas to implicate them you discusses them and you kidnap people like Dan and Stan and you look like them and the bombs are out there in Brazil it's your operation. Going to make you Gone and he's not going to miss you and he knows he's talking to miss you his little s*** bothering you if it's annoying as hell and you're making a slight very difficult and it's hitting the living crap out of you tonight

Frank Castle Hardcastle

It's good to see you go Jason it really is and don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out

Hera

Don't bother me Jason being don't bother me you threatened me so many times you should know this is what you get for it this is your payment this is how we treat people who do that to me and if you can't figure out just ask the Max and others what's happening to you because you're obtuse as hell you're stupid you don't understand what's happening to you and your Force you need to explain to you over and over and over in order for you to shut your face

Zues Hera

That's had enough for you you can't stand you this little in bothering everybody you didn't hear too at the house he made you paying money says you owe like 50 cents and it's going after it it's killing all your people for it it's kind of what he's doing people small money and it's just like killing them it doesn't care at all you say you don't care either cuz that's the cause when you get a time without your mouth I'm so sick of you little idiot kids you don't know anything you don't do anything you're not valuable you are in our face God's gift to the world

Billium

They sure are Lily or not they're not honest they're not doing what they told them or what we want them to that's why I'm going after them as well

Olympus

This year too the right order this little assholes do that and I tell you what we are getting stuff together this morning right now and meet

Mac

[deborahcastellano]

[The Rules of Exile] Rule No. 10 You Don't Get to Be My Last Great Whatever

Queen Catherine of Aragon was sent into exile because she had the nerve to be aging and menopausal.  A popular legend in that particular histo-mythic cycle is that Henry sent her away (sometimes, with Cromwell to do his dirty work for him because that was the kind of stand up guy he's remembered as) without saying good bye.  She was once married to his older brother Arthur in a castle in the wild but Arthur got sweating sickness and died.  They were only married to each other for a short time.  She then had her first encounter with exile where she lived somewhat modestly (again, accounts vary depending on the histo-mythic teller) and supposedly bargained for fish and sold her plate while her dad and her ex father in law dawdled over what to do with her.  Her father was a war monger with a bunch of kids, he had no problem waiting.  Her ex father in law held his country in a tight fist, he had been exiled so many times by his mother (Lady Margaret Beaufort) that he too could wait.  Neither appeared to find this particularly cruel, and neither did a seasoned politico warrior like Lady M.  Like . . .I get stressed out not knowing what's going to happen in a day while still being aware of certain potential outcomes.  I don't know how stressful it is to not know what country you're going to live in and/or who you'll be married to.  Queen Cat's ex father in law drops dead and she is married off to Henry for almost twenty years when she receives the message, u had too many ded babies, lulz.  super soz.  going 2 marry anne bc babies + she is way hot.  she will only put out if i put a ring on it. thx for nearly twenty years of marriage!  Best of luck or whatever.  Or, you know, no message past whatever Cromwell tried to piece together.  Whatever the medieval royal equivalent of dipping out of a pack of cigs was.

She died in exile a little into Queen Anne's reign, with only a few of her ladies and servants.  Sometimes the wheel (of fortune) is in your favor, sometimes it's not.  It was for a long time for Queen Cat, but then she never planned for Queen Anne. Partly because I don't think anyone, even someone who had headed a battle with Scotland like Queen Cat did, could have planned for Queen Anne.

Sometimes, the hardest part of exile is the people we have been exiled from.  Either by our choice or theirs (sometimes both).  Parents, siblings, friends, lovers, spouses, family, whole courts if you are particularly un/lucky and everyone else is either on the other person's side because they tell a better version of your story than you do or you weren't much beloved to begin with or the other person has too much power over the others for them to rise up for you.  Even Mary, Queen of Scots usually couldn't get the North (of England) to rise up for her and she was hella glam and hella Catholic (appealing traits to her target demo).

There is nothing more painful than this part of exile, Sister Queens.  It's too soon for revenge because you will not be thoughtful enough or have the means to plan that properly.  Your heart is a wasteland and everywhere you go, you know everyone knows something about you but you can only guess at what.  During this time often, your position at court has been forfeited, your rank and title is called into question along with your deeds and those still associated with you, your goods are often seized and people now consider if they would like to associate with you because they will be associated with you.  This has ever been the struggle, even in this modern life as (often) landless Queens - at work, in your family life, in your social circles, in your creative life and in your spiritual life.  A boss has turned against you, a break up that causes a fracture in your circles, side choosing over social issues, scandal and gossip that you were involved in.  To bring it down real low (like reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllll low), Vicki on Real Housewives of the OC is currently in exile due to her exboyfriend Brooks who was involved in a cancer scandal that she was at the very least, complicit in.  In turn, I'm positive that she was not only exiled from her realty television faux friends, but also likely saw repercussions in her business and in her professional career, at the very least.  Possibly within her family and social groups as well because even though everyone knows reality television isn't particularly real, it's hard to know where that shred of truth in the lie resides.

How do you survive in that trying time when the people in your life are choosing alliances?  How do you survive when a lover has played you false and now is flaunting their new whatever for all the world and you to see?  How do you get through when you have been exiled from your coven?  How do you go on when your coven exiles you?  What do you do when an event or social group that once loved you has turned against you?

A note, to a Sister Queen who has recently felt the sting of exile from an ex-lover:

As you know, my thought process on these kinds of events are filtered through figuring out patterns and lessons and possible and probable outcomes because that's just so my world view.  While I certainly take some time to reflect before moving on, I find that the Universe (with me) is generally like, Here's another whatever you just lost.  Fuck that guy.  So I'm at a point in life where I trust that will happen in a reasonable time frame.  But another core part of me (besides grudgingly trusting in the Universe) is like, Fuck.  You.  You don't get to be my last whatever.  You don't get that kind of power.  You don't get that kind of power over me.  I will replace you because I can replace everything and I will burn everything in the process if I have to.  Every.  Thing.

Obviously, if you know me at all, you know I value those in my life, but I also know that everything has a season blahblahblahturnwhatever.  Everyone could die, everyone could leave, every relationship could break, every event could end, every group could break apart.  So, like, when you know that and you've been through that a few times, you value what you have when you have it but you also have in the back of your head what you would do if you lost those things.

In terms of practical advice, I would suggest you branch out and try to find other events/groups/lovers/friends and to figure out what part you played in your own exile story (as that is a key factor) so you can mend what you can mend and move forward in a better direction with finding new wishes, hopes and dreams.  Talk to trusted advisers for their opinions of the events that led to your exile, figure out a game plan to get yourself back to court or deeper into exile, whatever your preference.  I will forever be Lady Jane Rochford to my complete despair, she managed to get exiled from court during Queen Anne due to being her sister in law (and testified against Anne and her brother George, claiming they were sleeping together, leaving them both beheaded) but when she was offered a position back at court two Queens later, she jumped at the chance and that's how she lost her head right alongside Queen Katherine (yes, another - this one was sixteen and sleeping with boys her own age, how dare she).  I can't stay away from the game, not like Lady Mary did (Anne's sister, Henry's former mistress - she married a nobody and stayed in the countryside where it was safe and died of natural causes and possibly boredom).  I am forever working my way back to court and onto better courts.  If you read me, that's probably you too.

Fine, we have you settled into fixing your situation practically.  Now let's get to the exciting part.  The part that requires sorcery.

A Spell to Reclaim Your Queenship

Items needed:

Myrrh

Charcoal, lit

Fire safe container

Fresh flowers (either picked or bought)

Floral wire

Floral tape

String lights or electric candles

two bowls

Rose quartz crystals

handful of dried lavender

Chalice

Sacred liquid to drink

Salt water

a candle, offerings

Tarot deck

Potential goddesses: Your own goddesses (which include ancestors and spirits, obvi). a historic queen you admire, St. Elizabeth of Portugal, Mary Queen of Heaven, Diana

If you've ever bothered to read my book, you know that planning your ritual is key.  Where will you have it?  Why?  What will you wear?  Why?  What day/time will you do it?  Why?  Who will you work with?  Why?  What does your crown mean to you?  Why?  What flowers are sacred to you?  Why?  What liquid is sacred to you?  Why?  Which Tarot deck will you use?  Why?  There are no wrong answers, only lazy answers.  If you are not being lazy, you are not wrong.  You know when you are being lazy.

Arrange your electric candles or string lights into a circle big enough for you to do your work.  Pour salt water into one bowl.  Arrange the lavender and rose quartz into the other bowl.  Arrange your small shrine to your goddess(es) along with the candle and offering.  Ask for her/their blessing to guide your hand during this work.  Use words that are meaningful to you.  Pour sacred liquid into chalice.  Put the myrrh on the charcoal.  Anoint yourself with the smoke.  Wash your hands, your third eye and the top of your head in the salt water.  Then, say:

I am Queen over my own body.  My body is sacred.  I am Queen over my own spirit.  My spirit is sacred.  I an Queen over my own mind.  My mind is sacred.  I am Queen over my own heart.  My heart is sacred.  I am Queen.  I am sacred.

Start making your floral crown.  If you are like me, you have literally spent more than half your life making them and have taught diy workshops on the matter.  This is no big deal.  If you're not like me, watch the Youtube video in the link and maybe do a practice one first.  Spend the time making your crown singing songs that are meaningful to your Queenship, trancing or meditating on your Queenship.

Rest your crown over the bowl of rose quartz and lavender.  Put your hands on your crown.  Repeat:

I am Queen over my own body.  My body is sacred.  I am Queen over my own spirit.  My spirit is sacred.  I an Queen over my own mind.  My mind is sacred.  I am Queen over my own heart.  My heart is sacred.  I am Queen.  I am sacred.

Touch the crown to your navel, your heart, your throat and your forehead.  Put the crown on your own head.  Repeat:

I am Queen over my own body.  My body is sacred.  I am Queen over my own spirit.  My spirit is sacred.  I an Queen over my own mind.  My mind is sacred.  I am Queen over my own heart.  My heart is sacred.  I am Queen.  I am sacred.

Hold the chalice in your hands.  Focus on what you want to bring to yourself.  As a sacred Queen, I won't want for . . .(love, strength, compassion, abundance, and so forth)

Drink what's in the chalice.  Thank your goddesses for their presence.  Draw a Tarot card.  That is your omen for your work.  Reflect.  Hang your crown over your bed and put the bowl of rose quartz and lavender next to or under your bed.

***

Please feel free to share pictures of your work, thoughts about your work and aftermath of your work where ever you read this.

xxx

[queerasinfvckyov]

You're clearly not getting the other anon's message, so I'll try to explain what I understood of it. Harry doesn't EXPLICITLY SAY anything political. Ever. The only sort of political statement we had from him was that he'd vote for whoever was against Brexit but that he wasn't that well-versed on the matter (and he's been living in England almost exclusively for the past two years, which is when BLM arose). He doesn't do political statements on stage, not verbally. He never has and I don't 1

understand why people expect him to make a political statement now, and why specifically with BLM? Which is a subject that’s completely out of his reach as a British person that lives in London. He was never going to SAY anything about the signs, but I have no doubts that if given a flag, he would wave it, because I absolutely believe he’s for the sentiment of BLM. He wasn’t given a flag. There was a flag folded and thrown on stage, to a side Harry was NOT on towards the end of the show 2

but I seriously doubt he even saw it, and if he did, he couldn’t have possibly known it was a BLM flag (look at the picture of it thrown on stage and you’ll see it’s 1. on the other side of where he was 2. folded so it’s impossible to see what it says). I absolutely understand the outrage towards fans that didn’t show the solidarity to bring the flag to the front, which they always do with rainbow flags. That’s something to point out. The poor girl that organised this movement had to throw 3

it by herself and it was really hard to get him to notice it, and it shouldn’t have been. Harry grabs flags that fans are waving in the front row, only once he picked up one from the floor (and it was very clear it was a rainbow flag, and it was by his feet). I just don’t understand the outrage towards Harry. He said he doesn’t do politics. You can dislike that, and that has been discussed to death, but his position on that subject is clear. He’s for equality as a fundamental right, but 4

refuses to discuss politics and I just don’t think that’s a problem. When he wanted to make a statement against Washington’s position about trans people in the military, he hung trans flags, he didn’t say anything. This is his style. Why are we attacking him for doing what he’s always done? Let’s get mad with the fans that aren’t doing what they’re supposed to, not with Harry. If someone waves a BLM flag in the front rows, and he sees it and he ignores it, then that’d be valid criticism 5 (fin)

Before I get into this I would appreciate if in the future you didn’t call into question my reading comprehension ability. I understood what the ask said, and I expect you mean well (at least I hope so) but I don’t need you to clarify it for me. I wasn’t confused. 

So let’s get into it. 

Harry doesn’t EXPLICITLY SAY anything political. Ever.

Believe me, I am fully aware that Harry doesn’t typically verbalize his political beliefs. I’ve never bothered to discuss it on the blog but I’ve rambled plenty in private conversations about it (and the boys’ politics more generally). In fact, I spent the better part of the day doing just that. I am aware of Harry’s approach to politics and the place politics has re: the image he wants to present of himself to his fans. 

Except. Except, except, except. 

He does make political statements. He’s made them for a while now, even if mostly inelegantly (which I certainly do not begrudge him; he didn’t do his A levels and he certainly hasn’t gone to post-secondary where a lot of people figure out how to convey these complex ideas). It started off with him telling people not to go to Seaworld. Why? Because they treat animals with cruelty. Now, animals are ‘easy mode’, so to speak, when it comes to politics. People generally all agree that animals are deserving of certain rights and should be treated well. This doesn’t seem like a political statement but regardless it is (eg, look at the laws that are being changed in the States re: shooting hibernating bears or the support for fox hunts in Britain; these pertain to the treatment of animals and they are also political). I acknowledge that this might seem to be irrelevant and small, but as I said, it’s a starting point. 

Moving forward, Harry has also on multiple occasions even BEFORE his solo tour acknowledge the queer community and queer rights. He’s acknowledged on twitter (yes, it might not have been him, but it doesn’t matter because it’s was still approved by his team and allowed to be part of his public image) the Westboro Baptist Chruch protesting the One Direction concert (a statement that specifically denounced them, if perhaps vaguely). Furthermore, let’s not forget about “lets have a good equal time” or “It’s looking colourful in here, and for some of you I know why. Happy Pride.” (this might not be the exact quote, but it was along these lines). And what about the picture of the rainbow flag and the rainbow on his instagram the day same-sex marriage was legalized in the States? And we can’t forget his “I study rainbows” tweet and bracelet or the odd rainbow flags he was already waving around during OTRA. 

These are ALL political statements and, with the exception of the tweets and instagram posts, they were all done on stage–but regardless all done on public forums. If Harry didn’t engage with politics he wouldn’t have made any of these statements whatsoever. 

(also, it’s a little pedantic, but BLM has been a “thing” for a little over 3 years now, not two; it’ll be four next august).

He never has and I don’tunderstand why people expect him to make a political statement now, and why specifically with BLM?

As I mentioned in the ask, I don’t get the impression that people were expecting him to acknowledge the signs or wave the flag, but they were hoping he would do so and, as I mentioned in my answer to the previous ask, I expect it’s because he’s been so adamant to create safe spaces for the queer fans. By waving those flags and making damn sure his concerts are a safe space for queer fans he’s making a political statement. He’s drawing his line in the sand, so to speak, and that line is that he won’t tolerate any kind of discrimination towards queer fans at his concerts. He opens up his concerts by saying that he wants people to have fun and “be whoever you want to be”. That is a political statement. 

Ever since that show in Nashville where people’s flags were confiscated, and Harry brought one out for the encore (whether it was his own or one of the fans’ confiscated ones) and stated that he was bringing it back to where it belonged, his waving of the many pride flags has been entirely political. It was a political statement before, of course, at the first two shows, but it was made all the more so after that show. His insistence on always waving a flag, no matter the circumstances, is a political statement, too. 

So why did people specifically want a BLM flag? Because Harry has made damn sure his concerts are safe spaces for queer fans–or, as I mentioned in the previous ask too, his concerts and wherever else he feels like it (the Hollywood Bowl We Can Survive concert was certainly not his own concert, but he made it a safe space anyway). Black fans (and poc fans more generally) exist without being queer. Why is Harry willing to get political with various queer pride flags but not BLM flags? 

Which is a subject that’s completely out of his reach as a British person that lives in London. He was never going to SAY anything about the signs, but I have no doubts that if given a flag, he would wave it, because I absolutely believe he’s for the sentiment of BLM.

People have every right to hope he would have, and be disappointed that the political statements he’s willing to make as things stand now, if vaguely, seem to extend only as far as queer solidarity. And, in the words of a dear friend of mine: “ no one wants harry to draft a 20 point policy on how we begin to eliminate mass incarceration?? It’s actually real simple: acknowledge our existence”. That’s all people were hoping he would do. And once more, as I mentioned in my previous ask, that’s all he would have had to do–acknowledge the signs were there. 

The issue, of course, is that based on the fan accounts we have so far, he was aware of the signs, and there is evidence in videos that there was at least one sign in the front row dead centre in support of BLM. He didn’t mention them. 

He wasn’t given a flag. There was a flag folded and thrown on stage, to a side Harry was NOT on towards the end of the show but I seriously doubt he even saw it, and if he did, he couldn’t have possibly known it was a BLM flag (look at the picture of it thrown on stage and you’ll see it’s 1. on the other side of where he was 2. folded so it’s impossible to see what it says).

He very well might not have seen it. The flag is dark and so was the stage, and as I’ve seen some people say around here they weren’t even aware BLM had a flag. It’s quite possible that if he had known what to be looking for he would have been able to see the flag. 

However. 

He also didn’t pay attention to the people that were apparently shouting about the flag being on stage. I admit this could be down to the general confusion and screaming that happens at concerts. Yet there were, apparently, a good handful of fans shouting about the flags and the signs even when it was quiet, and it should have been easier to hear then. Of course, if he wasn’t expecting people to be talking about the BLM at the concert he probably wasn’t primed to make the connection, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that there were signs in the front row and all he had to do was acknowledge they were there, even obliquely as he typically is with politics. He did not, and people have are allowed to be disappointed and disheartened. 

I absolutely understand the outrage towards fans that didn’t show the solidarity to bring the flag to the front, which they always do with rainbow flags. That’s something to point out. The poor girl that organised this movement had to throw it by herself and it was really hard to get him to notice it, and it shouldn’t have been.

I’m glad we’re in agreement about the poor behaviour on the parts of the fans there, and I and many others have been discussing how the other fans there (especially the ones who accepted the signs and then did nothing) are also responsible for the how things went. It seems like people were being ridiculously pushy and unaccommodating in the pit with one another as well. So much for treat people with kindness. 

I just don’t understand the outrage towards Harry.

As I’ve said before, people are outraged because they feel hurt and disappointed (although I don’t think there’s hatred). Resentment, perhaps, but what else could you honestly expect? Black folk and the black fans in this fandom in particular are tired. And who the fuck could blame them? When this is the kind of fallout that occurs in response to a project with the sole purpose of creating a safe space for black fans and poc fans more generally? Like Harry has been doing for 15 shows +1 for queer fans since his tour began. They’re tired that even in this fandom, in the concerts of somebody who cares so deeply about equality and treating others with kindness, it’s still SUCH a fight just to be given the same treatment as the others have been given.

He said he doesn’t do politics. You can dislike that, and that has been discussed to death, but his position on that subject is clear. He’s for equality as a fundamental right, but refuses to discuss politics and I just don’t think that’s a problem.

I do, of course, take issue with that. Whether he likes it or not, he is in a position of power and privilege and if he desires to think of himself as an ally he has a responsibility to do what he can with his power and privilege to be an ally. I don’t think anybody is expecting him to be an activist (I certainly am not), but he’s really not even doing the bare minimum in a lot of areas–like with BLM. As for seeing equality as a fundamental right, it’s a sweet thought, but the issue is that things he might consider to be non-issues and not up for debate are, unfortunately, inherently political in the current state of the world. If he’s for equality he must take some kind of stand against inequality, otherwise he is being permissive towards the institutional nature of many inequalities (in this case, racial inequality). Silence is violence, because silence is what allows inequality to perpetuate. You cannot be for equality and also refuse to “do politics”. 

When he wanted to make a statement against Washington’s position about trans people in the military, he hung trans flags, he didn’t say anything. This is his style.

Unfortunately I’m going to have to be pedantic again here. First of all, this is contradicting what you mentioned earlier about Harry not explicitly saying anything political ever and also that the only somewhat political statement he made was about Brexit. If you mean the Brexit statement was the only one he verbalized and that he doesn’t typically verbalize political statements, sure, but if you think the only way to be political and make explicit political statements is if you say them verbally I’m afraid I’m going to have to tell you to do some more research (and I don’t mean that maliciously). In fact, I would argue that most political statements are not done verbally but conveyed through via other means–particularly, through action. Look at the way we treat politicians: we only really believe them when they show us they mean what they say, which is done through implementation of policies–through action. Or, conversely, through inaction. 

Why are we attacking him for doing what he’s always done? Let’s get mad with the fans that aren’t doing what they’re supposed to, not with Harry. If someone waves a BLM flag in the front rows, and he sees it and he ignores it, then that’d be valid criticism.  

Firstly, I don’t like the way you’re talking about people’s response to what happened at the concert here. People aren’t “attacking” him. They’re expressing their frustration and their upset and their disappointment, and every single one of those emotional responses is valid. I don’t know if you’re white, but I certainly am, and not a single one of us white people–or even other poc fans, for that matter–have any right to say anything about the way the black fans (and other poc fans, if they are feeling similarly) are reacting to this. As a white person, I have no fucking clue, not a single one, about what it means to exist as a black person in the world to day and I and we other non-black fans don’t possess a single shred of authority about how people should feel and react to Harry’s lack of support for BLM (when, again, he has put the effort into being supportive for queer fans–which is definitely amazing, don’t get me wrong; as a queer fan it means a lot to me, but black fans and poc fans deserve the same) and validation of and solidarity with the black fans. 

Secondly, as I mentioned before in this ask and in the previous one, people are calling out the fans. That doesn’t mean people can’t also expect better of Harry. These aren’t “haters” or whatever you want to call them who are calling out the fans at the concert and Harry. These are other fans who want the fandom and Harry to improve and do better because they care, and because they have a right to expect and hope for better. Black lives matter. Black fans just want people to actually act like they do. 

[ellanainthetardis]

Hello - I just read the one-shot with all the Lyssa and Effie moments, and it was perfection. The last scene broke my heart! Can I prompt a story where postMJ Lyssa and Effie become close again, please :) I would love it if it was a longer one-shot about them reconnecting, but I will take anything. I also have my final exam for medical school next week, so would love it if you could make an exception and post it early. Completely understand if don't want to do that though, I will wait patiently.

This is clearly oneyear late so I hope you passed your exam! And if you did congrats! [X]

Lyssa Flavershym To The Rescue

The knock on the door came just as he wascrossing the hallway from the living-room to the kitchen with two emptybottles. He switched course without thinking twice about it, used by now to peoplebothering him in the middle of the day.

One year after the rebellion, rebuilding wasstill in full swing and the people were still few, it wasn’t uncommon forsomeone to fetch him because they needed muscles in town. He often went withPeeta. It was good for the boy to do somethingand Haymitch liked helping him put the bakery back together but it was moreof a District effort and they alwaysended up helping neighbors with their walls or roofs or whatever needed to befixed.

He glanced at the stairs behind him beforeopening the front door but the house was silent. He resolutely ignored thetinge of worry. Effie hadn’t been down in a couple of days and without herobsessive bouts of cleaning and her nightly tidying up, the house had become amess he was attempting to straighten before she came back to her senses andstarted ranting about how much of a sob he was. Not that she had any right tocall him a sob in his own house, of course, but that was Effie Trinket for you.

She was visiting, or so she insisted. It hadbeen five months now and five months of living in his guest room made it moreor less obvious to him that the arrangement would be permanent.

It had been odd five months too.  

Effie was… not the same. For the children’ssake, she put up a mask of cheerfulness and over the top enthusiasm thatdropped flat as soon as they left the house. Haymitch wasn’t sure they werefooled but they were good enough not to say anything. Peeta was the mostattuned to her needs and he was always very dutiful in making her feel useful,in allowing her that small dignity of being who she chose to pretend she stillwas.

She never bothered pretending for Haymitch.

Oh, she tried sometimes… But there was only somuch pretending she could do when she woke up screaming at odd hours of thenight or when she crawled into his bed still shaking from her nightmare whenshe didn’t simply start moping the floors at two a.m. because she couldn’t bearthe thought of anything being filthy.She couldn’t hide the fact she had become claustrophobic nor the small matterof her needing all doors and windows to be locked at night. She couldn’t hidethe flinches at loud noises or the growing panic in complete silence. Shecouldn’t hide the fact she was terrified of the dark or her new aversion tobeing touched.

It was hard to navigate around her. She triedher best not to take too much room in his house – mainly because she hadinvaded it without his consent, he figured – but it was their limbo of arelationship that was the most complicated. He wasn’t sure what they were,wasn’t sure where they were going from there, if they were going anywhere at all… Former lovers. Roommates.  So much more than that.

Nothing stirred at all upstairs and Haymitchpursed his lips as he pulled the door open. It had been a string of bad daysand he was worried about her. Last time he had checked on her, she had beencurled up under her blankets with a faraway look in her eyes. He hadn’t gottenmore than five words out of her.

He had been expecting one of the men who workedin town or maybe Sae but certainly not the woman who was standing in front ofhis front door.

“Mr Abernathy.” she greeted him quietly with anod.

One glance-over was enough for him to determineshe was Capitol. No wig – they had gone out of fashion or so Effie had informedthem all several times – and tasteful make-up but there was something about herthat didn’t lie. It was in her bearing, the way she kept her chin high and studiedhim as if he was… inferior. She hadglossy straight blond hair kept away from her face with a blue ribbon thatmatched the dress he could guess at under her open white coat. Her purse hadthe gleam of brand new leather, her heels didn’t have a single scratch and thejewelry was probably worth enough to buy his house two times over.

Not only was she Capitol, but she had money.

“What do you want?” he growled.

She was conducting her own inspection and hehad no doubt she was finding him lacking. And why wouldn’t she? His greylong-sleeve shirt had a hole under the armpit – something she could definitelysee given that he was holding the door to bar her entrance – the red and whitecheckered sweatpants were hanging low on his hips because the waistband wasold, he hadn’t bothered shaving since Effie had been locked in her room and thefacial hair was actually starting to itchgiven how out of control it was, his hair was too long, his eyes werebloodshot because he hadn’t been drinking enough, he wasn’t wearing any shoesand, of course, there were the two empty bottles in his hand. And he supposed he wasn’t smelling verynice because he couldn’t remember the last time he had taken a shower That toohad been before Effie had fallen prisoner to her depression.

The woman’s face was somehow familiar but hecouldn’t place it.

“I am looking for Effie Trinket.” she said. Hervoice was sweet and her tone calm but there was steel hidden underneath. “I wastold I could find her here.”

“Press is forbidden to come into the Village.”he growled, taking a threatening step closer. “Get lost before I call thePeacekeepers. And if I see you again…”

“I am not a journalist.” She pursed her lips asif the accusation was actually painful. The pout was familiar. Very familiar.

He studied her more attentively but he reallydidn’t know her. He was fairly confident she hadn’t worked for them during theGames. No stylist or prep team… Not that they were many of them left.

“Lawyer, then.” he sighed. Or court bailiff orwhatever. “Just tell me how much she owns you and I’ll write you a check.”

It wasn’t the first time and it wouldn’t be thelast. The rebels had left her without a penny to her name. They had waiteduntil he had gone back to Twelve with Katniss, far away enough that he couldn’tinterfere again, and then they had seized her – admittedly large – bank accountas well as her apartment and everything worth money that hadn’t yet been stolenin it. There were bills from before the war, huge ones, and debts she hadcontracted afterwards when she had tried to make a life for herself in thecity. Living in the Capitol wasn’t affordable for people who used to be wealthynowadays: they lived in shelters, begged for jobs in the streets and weregenerally having a tough time managing their hard-earned money. Effie hadn’tmanaged to find a job. Nobody wanted to hire her. He wasn’t sure how she hadkept the matchbox she had been living in for so long and he really didn’t wantto ask what sort of arrangements she had had with her landlord. He had beenforced to deal with the man when he had sent him the bill of four unpaid monthsof rent and he hadn’t been impressed.

Most of the time, he tried to keep the moneyproblems away from her. It wasn’t fair, certainly, and Peeta had more than oncetold him she would be angry when she would figure it out, but the crux of thematter was that she had no money, no job and no prospect for now and thattelling her would only force her to ask him for help, which mortified her andleft her uneasy around him. Haymitch would rather deal with this stuff behindher back and face the music later on, once she would be better – or never if she never found out. In hisopinion, he owed her anyway.

The woman’s blue eyes gave him another once-over.“You misunderstand me. I am not a journalist and I am not a lawyer, I wouldsimply like to see Effie Trinket.”

“Why? So you can tell her she’s a traitor toyour precious Capitol?” he scowled. “Get lost, lady.”

He slammed the door in her face and turned aroundto discard the empty bottles, grumbling under his breath about stupid Capitolswho needed their head bashed in a wall to get some sense into them.

He was nowhere near the kitchen door when theknocking started again. Well, it was more of a pounding this time.

“I said get thefuck away!” he shouted, tossing the bottles at the front door, feeling adeep sense of satisfaction when he heard the sound of smashed glass. Theknocking stopped and all that filled the silence was his ragged breathing. Hewaited for Effie to call his name in worry, to ask what was going on, but itdidn’t come. He rubbed his face and let out a sigh. He hated those kinds ofdays. He hated them. It was like shewas trapped somewhere in her mind and there was next to no getting to her.

“I am Lyssandra Flavershym!” the woman snappedthrough the door.

“Congratulations for you ridiculous name!” hespat, prevented from striding there and tearing the door open to physicallyremove her by the sea of glass on the floor. He couldn’t go there barefootwithout hurting himself.

Flavershym. That ringed a bell.

And suddenly he remembered. She was…

“I demand to see my sister at once!” sheinsisted. There was a loud thud andhe figured she had hit the door again. “You cannot keep her prisoner! I will gofetch Peacekeepers! I will…”

Muttering a curse and trying to avoid theshards as much as he could, he carefully made his way to the door and opened itagain. She fell silent mid-threat.

“Thought you weren’t interested in whateverhappened to her?” he accused, glaring at the woman. “Thought you hated her?”

Effie’s mother had come once to the hospital tobeg her to do something about her Gamemaker of a brother-in-law, to use herimaginary influence with the rebels to save him, and, when Effie and Haymitch had told the woman in nouncertain terms that they couldn’t – and wouldn’t – do anything, the Capitolhad stormed out in such a fury Effie had cried for two hours afterwards,swearing her family wanted nothing to do with her anymore. He knew she hadtried to contact them again after her release from the hospital and he knewthey had kicked her out the door. He knew her sister had been particularlyvicious.

Lyssandra had the gracefulness to blush.

It was a pretty blush but, then again,everything about the woman was pretty. She was soft in a way Effie had neverreally been. She looked like one of those old painting. Frail and delicate. Asweet candy.

He understood where the deep-rooted jealousyEffie had always sported for her sister came from but he really couldn’t seethe appeal. He would take Effie and her scars and the dark bags under her eyesany day against this woman who had barely known any hardship in her life.

She had lost her husband, sure, but from whathe had gathered, the husband hadn’t been faithful or particularly nice.

“May I come in?” she asked after clearing herthroat. “I wish to speak to my sister.”

“Yeah, you said.” he sneered, folding his armsin front of his chest, an immovable wall. “What do you want to tell her?”

There was a flash of irritation on her face andthen she flicked her hair back, betraying how nervous she actually was. “I donot think it is any of your business.”

“It’s my business if you’re here to upset her.”he retorted.

She jutted her chin higher in the air in a movethat was so Effie it took his breathaway for a minute. She never did that anymore. She had no fire left in her.Being contradictory just for the sake of the argument wasn’t on the table now.

But it only lasted a second. Then Lyssadeflated, her eyes pleading, her expression helpless in an attitude that, hesuspected, was more her style. She’s thesweet one, he remembered Effie saying once. He didn’t think the openvulnerability was an act designed to move him, at least not a conscious one.

“I do not plan on upsetting her. I simply… Iwould like to see her, to talk to her… To understand why…” Lyssandra stoppedtalking and sighed. “May I come in? Please?”

Haymitch knew better than to trust a charmingface but the woman seemed harmless enough so he stepped aside.

“Mind the glass.” he mumbled, glaring at theshard that had nicked his foot. He was a bit alarmed to see she was carrying asuitcase with her but he didn’t comment on that just yet, a bit too afraid thatshe would settle in his other guest room. Trinket women liked to do that, itseemed. “I’m gonna see if she wants to see you.” he told her, gesturing at herto go in the living-room. “If she wants you to leave, you’re out the door,understood?”

Lyssandra nodded once and stood there,clutching the handle of her suitcase, looking terribly lost in the living-room,as if not quite certain she ought to sit or not. He didn’t tell her to makeherself at home and her manners didn’t allow her to simply take the liberty todo so.

He took the steps two at a time and strode toEffie’s room.

“Hey, sweetheart…” he called ahead, not tostartle her. She didn’t even blink when he walked in though. She was staring atthe wall, curled up in the middle of the bed. She was wearing one of hisflannel shirts, the same she had been wearing as a pajamas for a few days now,and she looked so small in it… The breakfast tray he had carried up earlier hadbeen left untouched on the nightstand and he swallowed back his irritation. Itwasn’t just the wasted food, it was the fact she wasn’t eating properly whenshe was far too thin. “Someone’s there to see you.” He crouched next to the bedbut there was no visible reaction. “Your sister’s here. Lyssandra? Says shewants to see you.”

He brushed her tangled hair back, letting hisfingers trail down her cheek.

“Come on, Effie.” he sighed. “I know it’sdifficult but you need to come back, yeah? Wake up. Princess…”

No amount of pleading worked, though. Her eyesbriefly flickered to him once and she leaned a little into his hand but it wasall she consented to give him. Maybe if he had curled up behind her and heldher for a while… But he had tried that the previous day and it hadn’t worked.And chances were it would only make it worse anyway. It was one thing when shesought him out for hugs or sneaked into his bed at night and asked him to holdher, it was another to do it without her consent. She tended to freak out.

“Alright.” He was frustrated beyond measure buthe stood up before he could lose his temper. It wasn’t her fault. “Maybelater.”

She would snap out of it eventually.

He took the tray back down with him and, out ofsheer annoyance, tossed the lot in the sink. Cups and glasses broke but it wasthe theme of the day apparently. He felt like punching something. He dropped ona chair and grabbed a nearby bottle, contemplating the idea of calling the kidsover while taking a sip. He had asked them to keep their distance when it hadbecome clear it would be a bad day, mindful of her wish to keep her problemsfrom the children, but it had been three days now and the kids would reach her.It was magical. She would put a front for them. She might crash even harderafterwards but he also might be able to get to her in the interval.

A soft cough made him jump to his feet. Heturned around to see the stranger lurking on the threshold.

“I apologize but you were not coming back and…”she started.

“It’s not a good time.” he cut her off angrily.“You should come back another time.”

The woman blinked and then her eyebrows shotup. “You do realize it was a lot of trouble for me to come here, yes? Twelve isnot exactly next door.”

“Do I look like I care?” he spat.

Lyssandra pursed her lips tight. “Enough isenough.”

She turned on her heels and before he hadrealized what she intended to do and given chase, she was halfway up thestairs.

“You get out of my house now.” he warned, grabbing her arm.

She shrugged his hand off, clearly frightenedout of her wits but unwilling to relent. “Do not touch me or I will scream, youoaf! Effie! Effie!”

He didn’t want to hurt a defenseless woman, asannoying as she was, and thus he was forced to follow her close, trying tointimidate her into leaving while actually nottouching her. She was determined, he would give her that.

Once she found Effie’s room, she rushed in,took in the state her sister was in and whirled around, tears in her eyes andan accusing finger jutting into his chest. “What have you done to her? What did you give her? She’s drugged!”

“Didn’t give her shit!” he denied, incensed by that allegation. “She’s just… She’s…She’s fucking traumatized, alright?You’ve got nerves coming here and accusing me of hurting her! You’ve got somenerve!”

“I am taking her back with me!” Lyssandrashouted. “Try to stop me, I dare you! I will come back with soldiers if I haveto! I am taking my sister back home!”

“You’re touching her over my dead body.” hesnarled, his voice dropping to a low dangerous tone. “She’s here ‘cause shewants to be. Your family couldn’t give a rat ass about her and now…”

“But weare her family!” the woman hissed. “And youare no one to her. You have beenkeeping her here against her will. I just knowyou have!”

“Listen, now…” He took a step closer, glaringat her, ready to toss his good intentions out the door and her along with themwhile he was at it.

Effie let out a whine and curled up tighter,making them both shut up. She was trembling.

“Oh, darling!” Lyssandra whispered, hurrying tothe bed.

“Don’t…” Haymitch tried to warn but too late.She touched Effie’s shoulder, probably intending to hug her, and Effie bolted,her eyes wide and unseeing, her breath coming out in pants. She hit the windowhard with her bad shoulder and slid down the wall, jaw clenched in pain. Thepain had the advantage of making her a little bit lucid though. He saw hischance and took it. “Effie.” he said softly. “You’re safe. You’re in Twelve.I’m right here. Nobody’s gonna hurt you. I’m right here.”

She blinked fast, her pants loud in the newlyfound silence. Slowly, ever so slowly, her gaze traveled up until it rested onhim. “Haymitch.”  

It came out strangled.

He smirked. “Yeah. I’m here. You’re safe.You’ve been… You’ve been spacing out for a while, sweetheart. Was gettingworried.”

He didn’t make the mistake of trying to comecloser, not yet, not until she made it clear she wanted him to. Her body wasstill tense.

“How long?” she asked. She closed her eyes andtried to work on her breathing but she ended up gasping air like a fish out ofwater.

“A few days.” he told her.

Lyssandra moved as if to come closer but heglared at her and she must have gotten the message because she stayed put. Theharm was done though. Effie’s eyes had snapped open and she was staring at thewoman as if she was a threat. She didn’t seem to be able to get her breathback.

“Where?” she croaked.

“We’re in Twelve, Effie.” he told her again.“Everything else is over. You’re in Twelve with me.”

“I’m safe?” she insisted.

“Yeah.” he promised. “I’m right here. Won’t letanything happen to you.”

And with that she finally looked at him and herbody relaxed. He took that as his cue and came closer, careful not to make anysudden move. She tensed a little when he placed his hand on her arm but shesoon relaxed.

“I am tired.” she whispered.

“You’re dehydrated and hungry.” he countered.“’Cause you’re a stubborn pain in my ass who doesn’t appreciate my cooking.”

Lyssa gasped in outrage but a small smilefloated on Effie’s lips because she knew he was only teasing.

“I love your cooking.” she denied.

“Good. ‘Cause you’re overdue for somebreakfast.” he retorted. “You think you can stand or you want me to carry you?”

She mused that over for a moment and thenlooped her arms around his neck. He lifted her up swiftly.

“You reek.” she grumbled, wrinkling her nose.

“Yeah, well, you’re a bit ripe yourself.” hesnorted. “Breakfast first. Then I’m gonna run you a bath, alright?”

“Alright.” she agreed easily, resting her cheekon his shoulder.

Her sister was completely forgotten in hissudden hurry to carry her downstairs and get fluids and food into her beforeshe started being contradictory again. He was aware she was trailing behindthem but Effie had yet to acknowledge her presence and he had more pressingworries.

“Why is there glass everywhere?” she asked himwhen they reached the hallway.

“Dropped a bottle.” he mumbled. “Don’t worry,I’m gonna clean it up.”

“You’re barefoot. You shouldn’t be barefoot ifyou dropped a bottle.” she pointed out with concern.

“You’re barefoot too so don’t go walkingaround.” he reminded her because he was certain it wasn’t something she wouldhave thought of. She would have grabbed a broom and tried to clean the mess upout of worry he would hurt himself and never pause to think she might get injured. That sort of thingsslipped her mind nowadays. She couldn’t bear any mess anywhere. He placed herdown on one of the kitchen’s chair and immediately poured her a glass of herfancy orange juice – pulp free – that needed to be shipped straight from thecity. “Drink up.”

She obediently took a sip, which told him shewasn’t as lucid as she should have been yet.

He put bread in the toaster and whipped out thepan to make her eggs.

“Effie?” Lyssandra called uncertainly from thethreshold.

Having mostly forgotten about her, Haymitchglanced over his shoulder with some wariness. Effie really needed to eatsomething and he didn’t want her sister to upset her before he had managed toget her to swallow at least a few bites.

“Look, maybe you could…” he started, ready tooffer the use of the living-room if only it would keep her away for a fewminutes.

“Haymitch, where am I?” Effie asked, cuttinghim off. She was rubbing her face. “I… I think I am in Twelve but…”

“You arein Twelve, sweetheart.” he promised.

“Home?” she whispered.

It was the first time he heard her refer to thehouse as home and it made him feel…Strangely good. He liked that. Theidea that this was her home. Their home. It certainly feel less thana tomb than when he had been living in there alone.

“Yeah. We’re home.” he offered,

“What’s wrong with her?” Lyssandra asked,sounding horrified.

“Nothing’s wrongwith her.” he snapped defensively. “She’s just a bit confused. It’s gonna wearoff in a minute.”

Effie was frowning. “Is she… Is she real?”

Ah. He winced. He should have thoughtof that. She didn’t trust her mind sometimes. “Yeah. I told you your sistercame to see you, remember? She’s real, yeah.”

“Oh, darling…” Lyssandra exclaimed once more,with a little too much dramatic in his opinion. She sat down next to Effie andgrabbed her free hand in hers. Effie eyed her warily, still bringing her glassof orange juice to her lips from time to time, often glancing at Haymitch as ifto make sure he wasn’t going anywhere. If the woman noticed, she didn’t let on.“I came to… Well, I wanted to talk to you about what happened to Rufus but itdoesn’t matter anymore. I had no idea you were so ill. Mother didn’t say. If Ihad known…”

“I am not ill.” Effie refuted with a hint ofher usual haughtiness.

It made Haymitch smirk. He dropped the toastsin a plate along with the eggs and plucked the jar of strawberry jam from thecupboard before dropping everything on the table in front of her. Lyssandrabarely looked away.

“You cannot be held responsible for what youdid, of course. I had no idea…Mother, didn’t say.” the woman insisted. “I am very sorry, darling. If I hadknown…”

“You said that already.” he pointed out,pouring coffee into two mugs. He placed one in front of Effie and kept thesecond one for himself. Effie looked at him with a lifted eyebrow when he satdown and he rolled his eyes, stood up and fetched another cup for her sisterwho didn’t look very grateful about it.

“I will take you home.” Lyssandra declared.

Effie froze and snatched her hand away fromhers. “I am home.”

She glanced at him uncertainly and he noddedonce. It probably wasn’t the right time to tease her about her visiting but it was a shame because shehad been so adamant…

“Do not be silly.” Lyssandra huffed gently.“You need doctors.”

“No. No doctors.” Effie refused quickly,standing up so fast the chair clattered to the floor behind her. She huggedherself and took a few steps away from her sister.

“No doctors.” Haymitch promised firmly.“Sweetheart, nobody’s taking you anywhere you don’t want to go. Sit down andeat something.”

She hesitated for a few seconds before comingback to the table. It didn’t escape his notice that, while she picked up thechair, she chose to sat down next to him instead, on the other side of thetable from her sister. It didn’t escape his notice either that she was sittingcloser than strictly necessary. He simply reached out and dragged her platecloser, as well as her glass of juice and her mug of coffee. He also forced thefork in her hand and pointed at the plate.

She swallowed two mouthfuls, studying Lyssandrawith obvious wariness.

Lyssandra, who clearly wasn’t liking what shewas seeing.

“There were talks of putting her in aninstitution.” he explained because he could understand what it looked like. Effiewas dancing to his tune when she usually was a very independent woman. She hadaccused him of having drugged her earlier and he supposed that was how hisformer escort looked to outsiders right now: drugged, sluggish. It would pass.Hopefully in half an hour, once she was fed and had washed, she would be backto her senses. “Doctors aren’t her favorite people. Don’t upset her.”

“She is not well.” Lyssandra insistedpetulantly.

“Sheis sitting right here.” Effie snapped.  “Whereare your manners, Lyssa?” She pursed her lips and spared him a glare. “It isuseless for me to ask that of you naturally.”He snorted and leaned back in his chair, stretching his arm behind her, makingsure not to crowd her too much. She relaxed and ate another few forkfuls ofeggs. “I am not going back to the Capitol. If that is why you came…”

“I came because… I told you. I wanted tounderstand why you did not help with Rufus.” Lyssa countered. “I…”

“There was nothing Haymitch or I could do.”Effie sighed, rubbing her forehead. “I told Mother… We told Mother… It was complicated enough to keep me from being tried and sentenced at thetime. We did even know for sure if…”

“Wouldn’t have risked my neck for your husbandanyway.” Haymitch cut her off. “I had myfamily to look out for.”

“You are not helping.” she chided him, taking asip of orange juice.

“Ain’t trying to.” he scoffed.

Lyssandra looked hurt, angry and puzzled all atonce. Her face was an open book. It was lucky for her she had been a goodlittle citizen. She would never have made it otherwise.

“I amsorry for your loss.” Effie offered.

A heavy silence fell on the kitchen after thatand, aware of Effie’s uncomfortable fidgeting, Haymitch briefly stood up toturn up the old radio. The volume was soft, it was barely a background noise,but she flashed him a grateful smile anyway.

“I do not think I can eat anymore.” shedeclared ten minutes after that. “It was delicious. Thank you, Haymitch.”

Her plate was still half full and he made aface. “Try to finish the eggs, Effie.”

She shook her head. “I will be sick.”

“No, you won’t.” he sighed. “Come on. Please.”

She let out a sigh of her own and forcedherself to eat what was left of the eggs. She did look a little nauseousafterwards but she also shrugged. “Are you happy now?”

“Ah, sweetheart, you know me…” he teased.“Always the happiest one of the lot.” She chuckled and he smiled because shesounded a lot more like herself now. “Still want that bath?”

She placed a hand on his forearm and squeezedgently. “I can manage. You should clean the broken glass. And put slippers on first.” He rolled his eyes but smirked,watching her stand up. It was only when Lyssandra moved that they both lookedat her, having managed yet again to forget about her. She was very forgettablewhen Effie was in the room, in Haymitch’s opinion. His former escort seemed tohesitate. “Where… I mean… Are you staying for a few days or…”

“I am staying.” Lyssandra confirmed, glancingat him as if daring him to refuse.

He decided to ignore her and finish the foodEffie had left. He didn’t want it to go to waste for a second time.

Effie seemed oblivious to the silent challenge.“Alright. Perhaps you should… You should take my room. It is the mostcomfortable guest room. The other one is very small and it does not have abathroom.”

“I do not want to put you out.” Lyssa protested.

“Oh, it is fine.” she dismissed. “I can sharewith Haymitch.”

He did a double take at that, freezingmid-chew.

“If you are sure.” her sister said, a bitmistrustful, as if she was suspecting him of having planned the whole thing.

Not that he cared.

He was too busy staring at Effie.

She crawled in his bed after nightmares, yes.She tolerated him climbing in with her if he went to comfort her after she hadwoken up screaming. But had no point had she hinted at the both of themstarting the night in the same bed.

And she had offered that so casually…

It almost made him not mind the invasion of his privacy. He had been about to suggestputting her sister in one of the empty houses in the Village instead but heheld his tongue, suddenly more interested in having her over for a few days.

Effie was barely down from her bath, dressed ina bright pink dress and her hair tied in a somewhat fancy bun, when thechildren showed up for lunch. They paused when they saw Lyssandra but soonhurried to greet Effie, fussing over and asking if she felt better. Migraines was the official code name forthat kind of slip and Effie assured them the headache was gone and thatHaymitch had taken admirable care of her while making the rest of the house anabsolute mess.

She was bubbly and very much pulling an act butHaymitch held his peace, mainly because he saw how tentative she was around hersister. She was the perfect poster child for a gracious hostess but she wasalso distant and mistrustful.

There were all very mindful of each others’triggers but Lyssa kept making blunders that had Effie briefly freezing or sentKatniss and Peeta into a sulk. Haymitch navigated it all with the ease ofhabits.

He didn’t think he imagined her sister slowlyrelaxing around him when she finally realized he wasn’t drugging her or keepingher there by duress but was instead taking care of her. Trying to, at least.

Still, it was a bit awkward when bedtime cameto have to dance around each other. It was even more awkward once they were inbed. They stayed on their respective side of the bed and Haymitch felt so… weird.

He rolled on his side to look at her in thesoft glow of the side lamp she needed to sleep. She was staring at the ceilingand only slowly turned her head in his direction after a few minutes.

“It was an odd day, wasn’t it?” she hummed. “Iam sorry about Lyssa imposing. I do not think she will stay more than a coupleof days. She wants to reconnect. I think I would like that.”

“It’s your home too.” he shrugged. “You canhave people over.”

“She is very Capitol.” she pointed outknowingly.

And by that Haymitch figured she meant to sayher sister was fussy and turned up her nose at a lot of things nobody in theDistrict would have taken for granted.

“You are too.” he smirked.

Her eyes studied his face. “She is very pretty.And full of life. And… Sane.”

“You’re not crazy, sweetheart.” he scoffed.

“But she is pretty and lively.” she insisted.

“You’ve got a point?” He rolled his eyes.

“She’s sweet-tempered.” she added. “Andeveryone loves her.”

He wondered briefly if this somehow pointed discourse had anything to dowith her sudden readiness to share his bed.

“Yeah, well… I like my women impossible andbossy so there you have it.” he countered. “What’s this even about?”

She didn’t answer at once. She rolled on herside to face him and reached out slowly, bunching his shirt in her fist. Hedidn’t try to touch her, she was in control there. She set the pace, shedictated what she wanted… He owed her that. For what she had been through, heowed her that.

“You are a good man, Haymitch.” she whispered.

He really wasn’t.

But for her…

For her he was willing to try.