#(ok well just pack 9 because i don't really feel like sitting through a game for 20 minutes nowadays)

[hellyeahydkj]

the one party pack thing i've been doing is writing down the host voices, still need some of the international ones for pack 9...and also the others in drawful 2 since they're uncredited for some reason? only found out about the german host recently because jackbox tweeted about it

[drariellevalentine]

Medically Inevitable

Chapter 4- Radical Revelations

Characters:- Arielle Valentine, Sienna Trinh, Bryce Lahela, Landry Olsen, Elijah Greene, Jackie Varma, Rafael Aveiro, Ethan Ramsey, Harper Emery

Pairing:- Arielle Valentine x Ethan Ramsey

Warnings:- None

Arielle’s PoV:-

Completely exhausted from the day’s events, you head into the locker room and take a nice but quick hot shower. Drying off, you quickly change into a cute pearl silk tied top with a comfy pair of ripped jeans. Taking out the bun in your hair, you decide to let your hair down, parting deep to the left, caressing your revealed shoulders.

You enter Donahue’s to find it completely packed. You try to squeeze inside apologising every now and then and look around to spot your friends.

You finally find them sitting in a table at the furthest corner of the bar.

"Long day?" Si asks as soon as I slump into the seat next to her.

“You have no idea, according an 18 year old, I look younger than him, so apparently I not eligible to be a doctor cause I look too cute!," I sigh dramatically and she giggles.

"Careful please," Bryce says before placing a tray of shots in our table.

Jackie scoffs, " Why are you even buying us drinks, meathead?"

"He's being nice, Jackie.”, Sienna smiles.

"Yeah, and also you think you could afford to buy that tonight?" I add.

"Sure," she rolls her eyes, "Thank youu," she says sarcastically.

Bryce laughs. "Think of it as a good luck drink guys. You are going to need a lot of luck to get into the diagnostics team."

"Wrong meathead. What we need is brains and hard work. Duh!"

"And luck," Bryce adds smirking, ‘lots of luck’. He emphasizes on the word "luck".

After minutes of bickering in between Bryce and Jackie, Bryce leaves to join his fellow surgeons. But my friends are still talking over the fellowship.

"I can't still believe they'll be taking an intern in the team!" I hear Landry say, his voice filled with excitement. "Never in my wildest dreams did I think that they'll even consider giving an intern a spot in the team let alone train them."

"Cheers on that," Jackie says forwarding a glass.

"Let's have a toast guys," Elijah forwards his glass. "To having a marvelous fellowship."

As we all toast to it I say, "Honestly guys, good luck. I won't be joining the fellowship but I wish the best of luck to you all." I smile. Everyone stares at me like I just refused a million dollars.

"You won't be joining the competition?!" Jackie asks shocked. "But why?"

"Not everyone wants to join the diagnostics team, Jackie," Landry states.

"Maybe not everyone, but Arielle does. The diagnostics team is the very thing that made Arielle apply here, in Edenbrook. That's one of the many things she said to me the day we met." Jackie turns to me then giving me a look that says "I want an answer".

"I know. The diagnostics team is what made me apply here on the first place, but I changed my mind. I got through my first week because of you guys. I don't think I could have done it if you guys were not there to support me," Sienna places a hand on my shoulder, giving me an understanding look.

"I don't want to ruin our friendship by competing with you guys. I need you guys by my side not against me."

"Idiotic choice but your call," Jackie rolls her eyes. And I smile as Sienna hugs me. A while later, you all head home for the day.

General PoV:-

Harsh sunlight streams through the open curtains of Arielle’s magazine cover worthy bedroom. Arielle turns around in her bed to grab her phone from her nightstand. The alarm clock catches her eye ‘9:15 a.m.’ She bolts right up in bed, rushing to her closet while ranting a ton of expletives. Hearing the commotion, Elijah and Sienna rush inside to see Arielle on the floor half-naked tangled in a bunch of clothes. Sienna stares at her in confusion while Elijah understands what’s going on and bursts out laughing.

“What’s so funny?”, Arielle asks.

“You forgot today’s our day off, didn’t you?”, Elijah asks knowingly.

“It is? Oh shit! I completely forgot!”

They help Arielle out of the tangle of clothes. “Anyways, we were thinking of going to a baseball game so...I bought everyone matching t-shirts but they only come in two sizes you’ll have to adjust yours. Only then Arielle notices their shirts. Sienna hands her an red oversized t-shirt. “We’re leaving in an hour, get ready!”

Arielle’s PoV:-

You shower and slip on a robe after drying yourself off. “There’s no way in hell I’m wearing this!”, you exclaim holding up the red,baggy, oversized shirt. If there’s one thing you care about, it’s your style. You grab a pair of fabric shears and crop the oversized shirt folding the hem to create a neat finish using fabric glue, then cinch the extra fabric on the slides and secure it in place with a few stitches. You hold up the newly altered shirt and look to your mirror. “Much better!” Pairing it with a pair of studded white jeggings, white heel sandals and a couple of accessories, you sit down on your vanity’s stool. You take out your braid from last night, leaving thick curls in its place. You carefully clip your hair out of place and decide to brush on a little extra makeup. After finishing with your usual moisturiser, concealer and primer, you accentuate your almond eyes with a jet black eyeliner and brush out your brows. Knowing that you won’t need any help in the blush department, you move on to your lips. You decide on your favourite red transfer-proof lipstick ‘Bold Beauty’. You grab a crossbody purse and place your wallet, keys, phone and other essentials and head to the living room.

“What do you think? Is it too much?”, you ask uncertainly.

“Hot damn!”, says Jackie.

“You look gorgeous.”, Sienna says.

“Woah! You look good!”, says Landry.

“Someone call the fire department cause it’s getting hot in here!”, exclaims Elijah.

You blush furiously. “Thanks guys, I’ll drive us there.

You pile in the car as Elijah rides shotgun and gives you directions. You reach there at 10:30. “Ok, 10 minutes till game starts. Everyone split up and stand in a different line and get one of everything. I’ll get the drinks.” Sienna tells everyone where the seats are and everyone splits up. You get a drink tray full of sodas, beers and a lemonade for you, everything packed with ice, and head down to the first row where you find everyone holding snacks.

“Great seats Elijah!”, says Sienna.

“Have to be close to fully appreciate the bloodbath, these teams loathe each other.”

Landry and Elijah start geeking out as you, Jackie and Sienna are talking.

“So...I may or may have not seen you get into Dr. Ramsey’s car yesterday.”, Sienna slyly says.

“Crap!”, you think.

“Tell us everything!”, says Sienna.

“Seriously?”, Jackie asks.

You slowly confide in them about yesterday’s events and what you confessed about your personal life.

“Oh my god, Ari! I’m so sorry!” Sienna pulls you into a hug.

“It’s okay, I’m fine now.”

“Now I feel really bad for judging you, also very surprised and impressed that you managed to get away with sleeping on Dr. Terminator’s shoulder.”, says Jackie.

“It isn’t that big of a deal!”, you counter. Both of them give you a look. “Ok, fine, it is. He was actually really sweet, he even tried to console me.”, you confess. Sienna smiles wide at the mention of this.

“Anyways, you both have to promise not to say a word about this.”, you give them a pleading pout. Jackie’s about to ask about something else when you realise some kind of commotion is going on.

"Oh no, did he faint?" Si says and I look forward to see Jake Sandburg, one of the players lying on the floor. 

The other players rush to his side trying to wake him up.

"Uh, coach, he's in real bad shape," another player says leaning down beside him.

Their team manager hurries out," Damn our team physician quit on us just before the game."

"Is there any doctor here?" The manager asks and on instinct all of our hands goes up.

The manager looks clearly shocked to see five doctors in a front row but doesn't express it as we move towards the field asking the other players to help us move Jake inside.

We follow the other Nighthawker players into their locker as they carry Jake on a stretcher.

"Have you called 911?" I ask their manager.

"Yeah, the paramedics are on their way," the manager sighs, " Poor kid."

"Lay him here," I hear Jackie instruct them as they follow.

"He's got a pulse, but his breathing is shallow," Sienna says in a low and shaky voice. This sudden situation is clearly affecting her.

Landry pulls a stethoscope from his bag and places it against his chest.

"Sounds like fluid build up. We have to solve it fast or else he could be in trouble," Landry announces.

As the others take his vitals, Elijah and I  go to ask his teammates some questions, which we think might help us to crack the case.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" One of the player asks as we approach them.

"You can help us by answering some questions. Has this ever happened before?"

"Not as far as we know," he looks at his other teammates. " Also he had to pass a physical test just recently."

"He was called up from the minor league just a few weeks ago," the manager adds.

"Did he complain about any pain recently?"  Elijah asks.

"No, he was pretty quite, kept to himself. I think he was worried," the player says. "About what?"

The player shares a look with his manager as soon as I ask that. 

"Look, he's been struggling in the majors. I was in discussions with ownership to send him back down to the minors," the manager answers, a pained expression plastered across his face.

"Did he know about it?" Elijah asks in between.

" You know, the guys talk. Rumors."

"He was kinda freaking out about it, he kept sweating, hyperventilating," the manager adds and I make a mental note of it.

"Hyperventilating... How often?"

"I only saw it a couple of times," the managers states.

"Well, it could've been panic attacks," I conclude thoughtfully.

"He always seemed tired too. Yawing in the meetings, like he didn't get any sleep at all," the player from before says.

"Have you seen any changes in his behavior recently?" Elijah asks.

"Uh, I guess he's been hitting the ice bath a lot recently. Probably because of feeling sore," the guys answers. "But he'd do it even in the days when he wasn't playing," the guys adds after a moment.

"Thanks you for the help. Was he on any medications?" I ask before moving towards the table

"No. The team doctor left all the prescriptions and Sandburg wasn't prescribed anything," the manager says going through the charts.

"Thank you that'll be it," I say and look forward to find a player from the opposite team sneaking in. 

"Hey! You aren’t allowed here," I motion the others towards him as the player who was helping us moves towards him. But then to my surprise he hugs him and the other one whispers words of encouragement in his ears.

"Wait, weren't you two fighting in the field?" I ask shocked.

" Yeah, but that's only on the field. Ray and I grew up playing together in the streets of Miami. We are basically family," The Nighthawker player concludes.

“It’s that easy?”, you ask.

“When we’re in a game, our minds are focused on the game. But the minute it’s over, we’re brothers again. Iron sharpening iron, you know.”, he says but your mind is somewhere else.

“Iron sharpening iron. Competing makes them stronger...” You run back towards the patient.

I think it's a drug interaction. His medicines are amplifying each other out," I announce reaching them. "Two medications perfectly fine on their own, cauting each other to have an outsized affect."

"Oh, that could be it!" Sienna says, a sudden excitement hinting in her voice.

" But the team manager said that their previous doctor didn't prescribe him anything," Elijah says confused.

"Sandburg was already worried about being cut. If the team knew he had a medical condition, they'd be oven less likely to keep him around," I reply.

"So you think he kept him situation quiet to keep his job? Wouldn't be the first time someone's done that," Jackie shrugs .

"What do you think he was taking?" Landry asks.

"Well, maybe something for his panic attacks. Let's say fluoxetine," I reply to him

" That could be it. Getting a prescription for that isn't really hard..."

"Okay, maybe you are right. But what was reacting with it. What else was he taking?" Jackie cuts in between.

"Something for his soreness. His team members said he'd be sore even the days he was not pitching," I answer remembering what the player said.

"It could have been arthritic inflammation," Sienna states.

"Right? He's male in his twenties..." I try to think what it could be.

"Ankylosing Spondylitis!" Landry says.

"He could've been taking N.S.A.I.D for it, like - celecoxib," I say while checking his locker, " Here they are." I say taking out the medicines proving what we said is right.

" It could be doing irreparable damage to his kidneys! We gotta take him to the hospital as soon as possible," Elijah says.

The sound of helicopter blades cut through the commotion in the locker.

" The paramedics are here!" Sienna exclaims happily.

Soon the paramedics enter and you see Rafael running towards you. We explain him about the situation.

"Would you like to have a ride on the choper? My shift will end in five minutes. So after dropping Jake to the hospital we could maybe roam around the city," Raf says nervously once we are out of the locker. The other paramedics get Jake in the chopper.

"I would love that," I give him an assuring smile which he returns.

"Great!" He says making his way towards the chopper after asking me to follow him.

"Any certain place you have in mind where you'd like to go?" He asks smiling broadly getting back to the choper after we've successfully admitted Jake.

"Not really," I give him a silly smile.

"We'll have a tour over the whole city then, more fun," he winks and I giggle.

I am really enjoying the birds eye view. The city looks more beautiful from up here. Capturing the breathtaking city from above, I put it on my Instagram story.

The next picture I take is ours, I smile towards the front and Raf's is a candid, he's looking forward flying the chopper but smiling.

I post it on my Instagram feed, tagging Raf and captioning it "Soaring high with @raveirotheemt.”

You notice you have over 250 likes already. Perks of being famous.

"What do you see?" Raf asks and I look down.

"Edenbrook!" I squeak happily. " The first day in there, the hospital looked so enormous but now it looks so tiny!"

"Everything comes into perspective up here. It's one of the reasons I like it so much."

" How'd you learn to fly?"

"My uncle was a pilot in the Marines. He started teaching me to fly when I was still in high school."

"That was so young!"

"I just saw it as a fun thing to do on the weekends, you know. It was a great way to spend time with a great man," he smiles recalling the memories.

"Are you guys still close?" I ask

"He... He died two years ago."

"I'm so sorry Raf."

"He was really active in our community. When he wasn't flying, he'd organize food drives and buses for anyone struggling," he smiles sadly remembering those days," He's the one who inspired me to be an paramedic. I wanted to help people the way he did."

I nod at him understanding.

"Buckle up. We're ready to land," he tries to say it as normally as possible, smiling. But I know it is just an effort to not let people show his broken side.

“Hey, Jake and many other lives have had a chance to live because of you.”, I assure him.

He relaxes. “You too, Arielle.”

“You both land on Edenbrook’s helicopter pad as staff takes Jake away. You inform them of his condition.

“So... are you ready for the tour?

At first I thought that Beacon Hills were the most beautiful thing I saw today. But when we were taking a turn over Cape Cod Bay, my opinion changed. Nothing can be more beautiful than this. The breathtaking view of the glimmering ways merging with the bright golden sun creating a golden hue in the clear ocean water. The scenery is just breathtaking.

"It is beautiful," I say softly, still looking at the ocean.

"It's the best thing you can see in the city," Raf smiles.

"Can't disagree with that."

"And as much as I would hate for this to end," he smiles sadly, "But I need to return the chopper to the hospital now."

"It's cool Raf, we've been out here on it for a while," I smile.

Within minutes, he manages to fly back to the stadium and drops me off.

You return to your friends and show them the wonderful pics and views that you took.

“Of course!” After some time, you and Si head to the food court for a refill on food and drinks.

Ethan’s PoV:-

You’re stuck closing off an important deal with Banner Health alone, as Harper was called in for an emergency. You’re walking towards the bar in need of a stiff drink when a familiar waft of vanilla and cinnamon hits you. There she is, her beautiful jet black curled tresses falling below her waist, standing near you ordering something. She doesn’t seem to notice you. You turn your head the other way and ask for a club sandwich. A few minutes later, you receive a tray full of cheeseburgers. Somebody calls you.

“Excuse me sir, but it seems our orders got mixed up.” You turn around to find none other than Arielle. Her violet eyes widen in realisation.

“Dr. Ramsey! Hi, guess the world really is small!”, she responds enthusiastically.

“Some would say too small.” A petite intern who often you see beside her comes and doesn’t notice me.

“Hey Ari! I’ll take these down. You coming? In a minute, Sienna.” The intern leaves.

“I wouldn’t have pegged you for a baseball type of guy.”

“And you pegged me just right. I’m here to close a deal with Banner reps. They have me in the box suite, trying to butter me up with lobster and wine.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad...”

“I know it might surprise you, but I’m not one for schmoozing.”

“Nooooo... I don’t believe it. The great Ethan Ramsey doesn’t like it when someone butters him up!”, she feigns shock.

“Would you like to join me?, the words slip out before you can react.

Arielle’s PoV:-

You’re surprised. You’d never thought that your medical hero would need your help. He notices your expression and starts explaining, more like rambling.

“You know I’m not much good at speaking to other people, much less idiots but this is a very important deal for Edenbrook. Harper was taking the reins but she was called in for an emergency. One of your traits is that you’re quite persuasive, I was hoping that would help.”, he says.

“Of course.” You follow him to the private entrance which is blocked by a guard.

“Ah, Dr. Ramsey. The Banner Health execs are waiting.” He gestures for you to follow. The guard stops you.

“I’m afraid I’ll need to see some ID, Miss. Alcoholic beverages are being served.” Dr. Ramsey gets irritated.

“I can assure you she’s older than 21.”, he says. The guard insists. Sighing, you pull out your ID. His eyes flash with recognisation.

“I’m extremely sorry miss, but I have to follow protocol.”

“It’s quite alright.” Dr. Ramsey leads you into the private box, where you see a crowd of ‘business’ dressed people lounging on the posh sofas. He picks up two glasses of Malbec and hands one to you.

“Thank you. To deals, negotiations and whatnot!” He rolls his eyes. “To negotiations.”, he toasts.

“This is quite nice.”

“It is, don’t get used to it. I knew many great doctors, all who swore never to make it about the money but did. Don’t let it become about the money.”

“Ha! If only he knew I had millions of dollars in my name and still live like this.”, you think.

“You’re right. It never should become about the money.”, you say truthfully. Two reps saunter up and start sucking up to him. You roll your eyes internally.

“I’m sure there are many opportunities. By the way, let me introduce you to Dr. Arielle Valentine, one of Edenbrook’s newest interns, and one who shows much promise.”, he says.

Your lawyer/advocate instincts kick into action, which includes an amazing first impression.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Valentine but no formalities between us. I have already been impressed upon the very invaluable and precious bond of Banner Health and Edenbrook and hope today will also add on to that. I’m looking forward to the other ways that you have suggested for this partnership, all to help our patients.”, you say.

“Oh my, if this is who Edenbrook is recruiting these days, our partnership is very sure to exceed high expectations.”, they say. Dr. Ramsey nods in approval. They all start negotiating deals, which end in their favour and not-so-good for Edenbrook. Dr. Ramsey looks to you for help.

“Okay, time to pull out all the stops!”, you mentally prepare yourself. You launch into a very persuasive but subtle argument slowly shifting the deal in Edenbrook’s favour. By the time you’re done, the execs have given their consent and you just got them to add a lot of benefits starting from loans to better rates on different services including neurological and cardiac.

“Thank you, Ethan and Arielle for the pleasure. Perhaps we could meet for a round of golf next week to hammer out the fine points.

“Oh hell no!”, you think.

“Oh! Dr. Ramsey is busy next week but how about later tonight?”, you say. They’re about to agree when you drop the bombshell. “Dr. Ramsey and I have an appointment later this week at the shooting range and self-defence center downtown. Don’t worry, I have quite a few guns to be spared, but be warned, I’m quite experienced.”, you say trying not to burst out laughing seeing their shocked faces. You catch Dr. Ramsey which a not-so-well hidden smirk on his face.

“That’s quite alright, we both have made many commitments later this week.”, say frantically say.

“That’s alright, another time then.” A few minutes later, they both leave claiming they had to go. As soon as they leave, you burst out laughing.

“That was quite an act you put on there.”

“Who said it was an act?” He gives you an incredulous look.

“Anyways, it was quite impressive how you shifted the deal in favour to Edenbrook.”, he says questioningly.

You sigh. “Pretty much everyone in my family are lawyers, different areas though. I picked up a lot of skills when watching their hearings.”

“You’re quite good at it. May I ask why you didn’t follow their path.”

“...My godfather was also a doctor. He would tell me stories of how he was able to save lives, make a difference, experience all the love, pain, loss, heartbreak. And I fell in love with it over time. My father wasn’t supportive of it though. I don’t know what went wrong. When I was a child, we had an unbreakable bond. Over time, he buried himself in his cases, that bond slowly evaporating. My brother always knew that I would work in the medical field and was very supportive. When I announced that I had gotten into Johns Hopkins for med school, my father was angry and didn’t support me. He claimed that I had led his hopes up and shattered them, when all along I always was hinting about my dream to become a doctor. We both said hurtful things that a father nor daughter should ever say, that night. After that, I cut off all contact with him.”, you carefully say making sure not to give any clues that Dr. Banerji is your godfather.

Ethan’s PoV:-

You’re shocked. Utterly shocked. You’d never guess that this bright, cheerful, kind intern had such a rough childhood. Especially when your’s made you turn out like this.

“I believe you made the right choice.”, you assure her.

“That means a lot to me.(more than you could ever know)”, she says and whispers.

You both relax and lounge on the comfy sofa, watching the game.

You notice the sun setting as the game ends. “It’s quite late, how will you get home?”

“My friends and I came here by my car, but I told them to take my car when they said they were leaving early. I spent all my money on food so I’ll take a train or something.”

“I’ll drive you home, it’s the least I can do.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to impose.”

“It’s alright. Let’s go.” You lead Arielle to your car, at the same time kicking yourself. “Dear god Ramsey, what the hell is wrong with you? Offering a ride!” You convince yourself that it’s just a thank you but you know it’s because you want to make sure that she gets home safe.

Both of you are exiting the stadium and stop when you see Harper.

“Ethan! Thank god you’re still here. I just received the terms of agreement of our deal with Banner. What did you do?” She notices Arielle.

“Dr. Valentine, what are you doing here?”

“She was here with her friends when I saw and asked for help with negotiating. She was the one who turned the deal into our favour.”, I quickly reply.

“Very impressive Dr. Valentine, but do know that this doesn’t make a difference in the fellowship rankings.”, Harper says.

“I know Chief Emery, anyways I haven’t entered the competition. But thank you though.”, she replies. You’re surprised. You thought she had entered, but you never checked the list of participants. You tell her to wait at the car.

“You’re dropping her off?”, she asks.

“She literally just scored us a very big deal. I’m just thanking her.

“Hmm... Well I’ll see you later. Goodbye, Ethan.” You nod and get in your car. Turning on the engine, you drive.

“Where do you live?”, you ask.

She pulls up a location 20 minutes from here on her phone.

“Why didn’t you enter the fellowship?”

“Did you want me to?”, she asks. You don’t answer.

“My first week was hard enough, with a competition that would jeopardise our friendship, I decided it wasn’t worth the risk. Especially when they were the ones who got me through the first week.”

“I understand. A lot of friendships of mine were severed during my residency due to the competitiveness.” You both talk about leisure topics until you reach a tall apartment complex.

“This is me. Thanks for the ride, Dr. Ramsey.”, with that, she swiftly exits out of the car. You reverse the car and drive to your apartment.

Arielle’s PoV:-

You walk up to the entrance of your building, taking the elevator to your floor. You pull out your keys when Jackie opens the door and lets you in.

“I was wondering when you’d be back.” You smile, taking off your shoes and head into the living room.”

“Hey Ari! Join us for a drink!”, says Elijah.

“Nah, I don’t want a drink. But yes for the company.”

“You all better kiss that fellowship goodbye, cause I just solved that case in record time.”, Landry says.

“You do realise that Arielle was the one who did most of it and we all helped.”, Jackie says.

“Exactly, I looked at the clues and diagnosed the problem!”

You laugh with your friends as they playfully egg each other on. You’re going over today’s events, thinking about all the crazy events, when you realise that you haven’t been true to yourself. “Competing makes them stronger.”, you remember saying. You’ve given advice to other people but you aren’t following your own. You bolt up from the sofa, grabbing your purse and keys and head towards the door.

“What are you doing, Ari?”, Sienna asks.

“You smile replying, “Something I should have done way before.” Your roommates give you a knowing smile as you head towards Edenbrook.

You park your car, rushing through the atrium and up the stairs towards Dr. Ramsey’s office. You a minute to compose yourself and knock.

“Come in.”, his professional but baritone voice replies.

You enter his office to see a minimally decorated desk, covered with papers and patient files. He files them away neatly as you enter. “Rookie. To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“I want in.”

“I made it clear that the cutoff was midnight.” Your eyes follow his gaze to the wall clock. ‘12:02’

“What makes you think that you’re an exception?”

You steady yourself. “I know I can be a good doctor. I know that I can make a difference in people’s lives, like you do. It just took me a little longer to realise it.” You gulp, wondering if you’ve blown your chance.

He smirks and pull out a long list of names, adding yours at the bottom. “You had me worried there. What changed your mind?”

“I always advised other people to follow their dreams, never give up, to take a leap of faith. I realised I needed to take my own advice.” He nods with approval.

“Good Night, Dr. Valentine.”

“Good Morning, Dr. Ramsey.”, you say, pointing at the same clock ‘12:08’. He shakes his head with amusement.

You head out to your car, the cool autumn breeze in your hair, and drive into the night.

“Bring it on.”

[the-suriel]

which parts of acowar did you dislike/didn't sit so well for you? i don't want you to get hate or anything but like what did you wish sjm didn't do? x

Hey Nonnie!

Ok. This turned out to be a REALLY LONG list so I’m putting it all under a cut, that way people don’t feel obligated to read this if they are tired of ACOWAR hate.

 If you are one of those people that are really tired of ACOWAR hate it’s totally ok to just scroll down, you do not have to read this.

Here we go… 

1) Mor.

I feel that she was so mistreated in this book. Even in the beginning when Rhys pulls the whole Eris scheme on her and letting her in the dark??? Why? I don’t understand. Why couldn’t he just sit her down before the meeting, explain the situation and ask for her input? Or at least let her know what is happening and give her the choice to stay if she is not ready to face what is possibly the two people that hurt her the most in her life. 

It felt so OOC for Rhys to do that to her. SJMaas is always reinforcing how good he is for always giving everyone a choice, but with Mor that didn’t happen at all. Not only was it cruel to put he in that situation, but as his third, she should have known. She is the Queen of Hewn city she is supposed to know these things before they come into action. 

I hated so much the way she came out. Don’t get me wrong here, I was so so happy to see that we finally get LGBTQA representation, but it was executed so poorly. I mostly agree with what a lot of people have been saying, it felt like a last minute decision on Maas’ part. 

I was also really sad that with the way it was written it almost makes it seem cruel that she didn’t tell Azriel about it for all those years. I just really really hate that? I am not supposed to blame someone for not coming out, everyone takes their own time until they feel comfortable enough to take that step. I feel like it was not ok for SJMaas to write her into that situation. 

And plus it was just kind of unrealistic??  I remember someone on Tumblr pointing this out, now I can’t remember who, but are you really trying to tell me that Mor kept this a secret from her cousin the deamati and her friend the shadowsinger and spymaster for 500 years!!?? They should have found out by this point honestly.

2) The Resurrection

This is more of a personal pet peeve than anything. Maybe this is because I watched TVD for so long, but I really, really hate when people come pack to life like that. It’s fine when it’s someone that was never introduced to the story and was believe to be dead, or when we don’t know for sure if they are dead but when someone drops dead on the ground I expect them to stay dead. 

I could swallow it when it was Feyre back in ACOTAR, I cringed when Jurian was resurrected but I draw the line at Rhys. It felt like cheating, and that’s not something I want to feel a few chapters before the book ends.

3) Tamlin 

Tamlin was a wild ride. His character shifted so much throughout the book, and I understand a fair amount of that is due to the fact that we read the story through Feyre’s point of view. I really wanted to see some closure on the Tamlin plot line. He was such an essential part of Feyre’s arc, and he kind of got brushed to the side in most of ACOWAR. I really wanted to see a scene when they sit down and talk about what happened, I wanted him to recognize his mistakes and perhaps, I dunno apologize. I felt like Feyre still needed to say a few things to him to truly move on (same goes for him honestly). Obviously she has no obligation to have a conversation with her abuser if she does not feel like she is ready, but I think that it would have been a good way to complete her arc. 

4) Lucien

Why did she get rid of him???

I started resenting Lucien a bit after the end of ACOMAF but I was so sold on him again by the start of the book. 

Again Why did she get rid of him??

He had so much to add. why???? It felt like a cop out for not having to deal with elucien in this book.

His absence made me sad :’(

5) The Threads 

 I know, I know, this is just the end of feysand’s arc and there are going to be more books, but the number of unanswered questions I have is very annoying. I have more questions now that I finished the book than when I first started. 

There are going to be more books but that does not change the fact that this is supposed to be the closing book in a trilogy. She should have ended a few more threads instead of leaving it all so open. ACOWAR almost felt like a week second-book-in-a-series. it felt more like a bridge book than the resolution to this section of the story. 

6) Papa Archeron 

Although I did appreciate that he died and stayed dead, I wish SJMaas had explored his relationship with his daughters a bit more. I wanted to see his reaction to them being Fae, or the inner circle’s reaction to meeting the man that gave up on their High Lady when she was a child. It would have been such good character conflict. I also felt like the Archeron sisters deserved more closure than just a last minute funeral. 

7) Mor & Nesta

Why was Mor so mean to Nesta???

That felt so OOC of her. Can she not see that Nesta is going through some shit right now? They all expect Nesta to be very cruel and cold (which I would even argue is just a front [Feyre had literally told Cassian before that she thinks is a front but anyway not the point]) but I really didn’t expect Mor, a 500-year-old woman who has also seen some shit in her lifetime, to act that way to someone. She could have really used Mor’s help. Mor has no obligation to be there for Nesta when she is very rude towards most of them, but it would have been nice to see that friendship blossom.

8) Explanations

This point kind of relates to the previous point on threads. There was so, soo, so much thrown into this book, and not much of it was explained. People have already mentioned the lack in world building in the magic department, but even the subplots were lacking in context and explanation. 

The continent territories that were briefly mentioned were just that, briefly mentioned. I don’t really know what the king’s Ravens were all about (why were they called the Ravens? why did they look like all black and white? was it coincidence? was it just for the aesthetics?) The cauldron was also not developed enough for something that is so significant in the story, we still don’t know what power Mor holds, (The power of truth?? What does hat even mean?) and apparently Azriel can turn into shadows, I think, but like how ???? how did he become a shadowsinger? do the shadows speak to him? And Elain being a seer? Was that explained? How do the death gods work? I thought they couldn’t die. I mean obviously not.

SO MANY QUESTIONS

9) Moriel 

If you were a Moriel shipper you are put in a position where you either resent Mor’s sexuality (WHICH IS NOT HOW PEOPLE SHOULD FEEL, SPECIALLY FOR A BOOK THAT IS SOLD AS YA, A GENRE THAT TARGETS A YOUNG AUDIENCE) or you feel like your feelings toward the ship are/were invalid. 

Moriel, to many of us, was written with the intention of being end game. I don’t think it was even a question for most people. It was almost heartless to give so much hope for a ship and then completely squash it, I don’t think that it was fair to the readers. She should have hinted at it a little more or just written this situation differently so that this didn’t happen. It was sad to see that something that was supposed to be such a positive representation, this strong independent woman that is also a member of the LGBTQ community, get caught in the middle of this. Sarah should have written this better.

10) Feysand

It was nice to see feysand happy but I wish we still got some development in their friendship. They have only known each other for a year, they have only really gotten to know each other 6 months (ish), I felt like their relationship could have been further explored maybe bringing in new sides to their personality.

11) Grammar and Diction

Ehhh well, there is definitely some improvement to be done in this section. It wasn’t horrible and it didn’t damage my understanding of the plot or the character but I have to agree with what people are saying, this book was severely under-edited. 

The most prominent things that drove me insane were the sentence fragments, the use of –dashes– and …ellipses… in almost every page. Oh and the diction. The diction especially though. The one that stuck out to me was how many times she use ‘the former and the latter’ in her sentences. It is a good way to describe thoughts or action, but not when it is used every 3 chapters (I have the ebook, I checked). In my version of the book there is even a quotation mark missing (page 461 I believe). I understand that mistakes happen especially when writing a book this size, but this is a sequel to a best-selling series, and she probably has a whole team of people helping her with things like this.  

Again, it just felt lazy. For a best-selling author, she should not have mistakes like these in her work. It became such distraction that I am now writing about it.

 Anyway, this got a bit long but here are my 2 cents. I hope I didn’t offend or insult anyone, and if I did that was never my intention.