#(like we all know gary's the love interest he has to become understandable and likeable at some point)

[not-poignant]

Gary got me. Pia, he got me, I cried like a baby over that scene. This was the moment so much of his shitty behavior in the past made sense to me. Now I just want him to get cuddles and a happy ending. How do you do this???

Idk anon it's just one of my favourite things to do!!!

I love that turnaround moment so much. I love reframing a character's actions without forgiving them, so that people can go back and reread (if they want) and feel the weight of those actions with the added knowledge of what was behind them and feel out for themselves what it all means to them. I love the moment someone is like 'oh no he needs a hug' after like 'can we smack him tho' dslakfjsa

There's something about adding layers to a character, where it's like...the first layers are mostly just one flavour with hints of something else. That flavour might make you think the character is 'good' or 'bad.' In the case of Gavril in The Golden Age that Never Was, a lot of people initially liked the 'sweet' flavour he came across with, and over time I 'spoiled' it, adding more layers. (I like also making a character that previously seemed amazing, really awful sdalfkjas).

But I love just...adding the layers, and one day you get a layer and you're like 'holy shit I thought this was X but it's actually Y, and X is just on the surface, or only a small part of it.' I feel like sometimes that's how we get to know people. We see the layers they want us to see, but there's other layers there.

Ngl I live for these moments. I never know exactly when they're going to happen, either. Like a lot of people have already had their 'moment' where they've come around to Gary, and for others it might wait until nearly the end of the story. Some people are ready to embrace and love an asshat, and others hold back, with much more grudging approval, and others never come around (some folks will just always hate the Raven Prince no matter what, for example, and I'm sure the same will happen for Gary).

It makes writing serials so exciting and dynamic to me. And it makes it so much fun, in the sense that like, I feel like I get to share something about a character like a secret, and people see that secret and it's like 'OH I get why that thing was hidden but ALSO it changes a lot and recontextualises this person.' You get to know them not as they wish to be perceived - which is how they come across initially - but as *who they actually are* - which is different for everyone.

Idk I just love ittttt

[woodland--fae]

If I were SJM writing ACOWAR I would have dramatically changed the outcome of Rhys’ resurrection.

Ok. Time for another ACOTAR rant because I just can’t help myself.

One of my biggest complaints about this series is how the main characters are never faced with threats that actually threaten their power. While they may battle insurmountable odds, the reader comes to expect that they will achieve their goals unscathed and with dramatic flair. Rhys, Feyre, and the rest of the IC are blessed with immense power, even better looks, and an author who thinks they are perfect in every way. 

The characters are so perfect that they can die and be resurrected with virtually zero consequences. SJM has made them invulnerable. 

Don’t get me wrong. I hate when beloved characters die in a series, but it is equally frustrating when characters “die” and are then resurrected within minutes at seemingly no cost. Dramatically, this takes away from the emotion of the moment and cheapens the initial sacrifice by making it seemingly moot. 

What am I referring to? Rhysand’s death (or lack thereof) in ACOWAR. 

If I were SJM writing ACOWAR I would have dramatically changed the outcome of Rhys’ resurrection. The price of his sacrifice for Feyre should come at the cost of his High Lord powers. We know, according to the lore that SJM herself has written, that when a High Lord dies his power automatically transfers onto another. We also know that in ACOWAR Rhys is dead. I know Feyre talks about an essence of him holding on through their bond, but for all intents and purposes he is dead. If the other High Lords don’t offer up part of their life-force, Rhys remains dead. It’s as simple as that. Therefore, during those moments before his resurrection it makes sense that the High Lord powers of the Night Court would transfer onto a new High Lord. 

I get so excited thinking about this twist for multiple reasons. 

I love the idea of Rhys’ love for Feyre and his people manifesting in his self-sacrifice. We know that Rhys is devoted to his people and to Feyre. He has also made sacrifices for his court in the past. This ultimate sacrifice reinforces this characterization. Furthermore, the loss of his High Lord powers is compelling because it proves that Rhys was willing to give up his immense power for the ones he loves. Since Rhys willingly sacrificed himself in ACOWAR, we can make the assumption that he knew his power would end up transferring to someone else upon his death. In contrast to other fae who put power before everything else, Rhys would stand out as willing to give up everything for love. This makes Rhys more likeable and less of an arrogant asshole who gets what he wants when he wants because he is all powerful. I for one am not impressed by how he is seemingly the most powerful High Lord in Prythian for…reasons. It’s cheesy, and makes the main characters literally invulnerable. It makes the story boring and frustrating and gives the characters no room for personal growth. Why grow when you already have everything? I think it would be more interesting for readers to see how he and Feyre adjust to life without his High Lord Powers. Who is Rhys without his godlike powers anyway?  Which leads to my second point.

If the High Lord Powers of the Night Court are transferred… who do they go to? Definitely not to a member of the Inner Circle or any other ally. We’re here for compelling plot, not giving characters advantages just because we like them! No. My suggestion is that the High Lord powers shift to…. Keir!!! You might be asking yourself, why Keir? He is such an asshole and would be a terrible High Lord. To which I reply, exactly! To set up the conflict in the next series of books we have ACOWAR end on a bittersweet note. On the one hand, the King of Hybern is dead, and all the major characters survived! On the other hand, Rhys’ power has transferred to one of his enemies. Not only are Rhys and co. now vulnerable, Velaris is also at risk from their new High Lord. This bittersweet ending achieves a good payoff for the survival of all the main characters. Stylistically it makes for better writing and a more realistic end to the series instead of “and we lived happily ever after as the most powerful High Lord and Lady in existence.” The sequel series would see Rhys and co. struggle to regain/retain control over Velaris and their people. The plot with the human queens is all good and fine… except that SJM literally never lets us leave the Night Court. 3/4 of the action in books 3 onward takes place in the Night Court. Therefore, it would be a nice change for the conflict to actually take place there and not with some Human Queens that have hardly any page time. This conflict with the new High Lord of the Night Court also offers some interesting new opportunities for character development. Rhys, for the first time in his existence would feel like a stranger in his own court and body. Technically, under Amarantha he was unable to access the majority of his High Lord powers but in that case it was different because he was still High Lord and had access to some of that power however diminished. In this circumstance, he has been stripped of all High Lord powers. He wouldn’t have all the answers, he literally is not in control. This allows him to empathize with Nesta and Elain. Feyre’s sisters also feel like strangers in their new bodies. They were violated and forced to become Fae; they unwillingly gave up their humanity in a way that parallels Rhys unwittingly giving up his power to Keir. In this alternate series Rhys comes to respect and understand both Nesta and Elain for who they are, not who he wants them to be. They have similar journeys of self discovery as each has to learn how to live again. Speaking of Nesta…. oh baby let’s talk about Nesta. Who took immense power from the cauldron? You guessed it, our girl Nesta. Who retains this power even when Rhys is powerless? Ding ding ding, right again! Nesta. In this alternate series women do not have to give up, or diminish their power while their male counterparts get to enjoy it (re: Amren returning with zero powers while Rhys retains all of his at the end of ACOWAR). How great would it be for Rhys and Feyre to need Nesta to help them stand against Keir? How great would it be for Nesta to have a character arc where the main characters actually respect her autonomy, personhood, traumas, and power??!! Reading ACOSF made me equal parts upset, angry, and bewildered. Here are a few reasons why: strong female characters don’t allow others to walk all over them, refusing to fund Nesta’s lifestyle and controlling every aspect of her life are two different things, and Nesta is not the only character who needs to apologize. I’m going to say it again, Nesta is not the only character who needs to apologize. That’s all I’ll say on this subject as ACOSF is another rant for another day. I think these changes in plot also benefit Feyre’s character as well. I see a huge difference between the character I loved in ACTOAR & ACOMAF and the rest of the series. It’s unrealistic that someone with very little leadership experience can fall so easily into the role of powerful High Lady and I feel like her character lost a lot of relatability as the series progressed. The Feyre of ACOTAR would not act like the Feyre of ACOSF.

When the courts were first introduced to us it always bothered me that there were four seasonal courts but only three solar courts… where is the dusk court? I think that my alternate sequel series would culminate in the birth of the Dusk Court. It bothers me that the Night Court is so divided. Rhys literally hates the Court of Nightmares and at best merely tolerate them. It’s hard to reconcile that both Velaris and the Court of Nightmares are the part of the same Court. On other days I would argue that Nightmares are dreams too and Rhys has no business condemning literally half of his court in favour of Velaris. But today I’m going to give it to him. In this  alternate sequel series, Velaris is different for a reason. It isn’t meant to be part of the Night Court. Velaris seems likes a different court, and so it shall be: behold! Velaris, capital of the Dusk Court! Who leads them? The newly minted High Lord and Lady of the Dusk Court: Rhys and Feyre. It may seem counterintuitive to give Rhys High Lord powers back when I’ve established why it is so important for him to lose them, but in my alternate series he will have had to fight, make sacrifices, and develop empathy for other people in ways that make him worthy of being High Lord. It also works as a narrative device for him to receive what he lost after proving himself (by working alongside Feyre, her sisters, and the rest of the IC as equals). I also think it is fitting that Rhys and Feyre could create a new court together. 

I hope you have enjoyed my rantings. I’m going to end this here since it’s already obscenely long. I would love to hear your thoughts! I believe firmly that Rhys should never have resurrected with his High Lord powers. The consequences of this could have been so compelling for future books. And it upsets me to see such wasted potential for character growth. This rant is mostly an exercise for myself to rewrite the worst parts of these books in ways that let me love these characters again. No-one should be victim to Mary/Gary Stu-Syndrome. not even Riceball. 

[michaelsheenpt]

Michael Sheen reveals the real-life serial killers who inspired his performance in Prodigal Son

Michael Sheen stars as serial killer Dr Martin Whitly in Sky’s new US import Prodigal Son – and if his character seems unnervingly realistic, that could be because the actor studied several real-life serial killers to get the performance just right.

In Sky One and NOW TV‘s Prodigal Son, Dr Whitly – also known as “The Surgeon” – has been behind bars for more than a decade. But before his crimes were discovered, he was a loving father-of-two, a highly-respected thoracic surgeon, and a pillar of the local community.

The role is an interesting one for Good Omens star Sheen, who in 2016 announced his directorial debut with a movie about the Green River Killer (in which he also planned to star). The project, still in development, would tell the story of Gary Ridgway – a US serial killer who pled guilty to 48 murders during the 1980s and 90s.

“Even though that’s a very different case and a very different serial killer, character, to my character in it, just being in that world and spending so much time working on that project gave me a lot of help when I came to work on this,” Sheen told RadioTimes.com and other press.

“But I also looked at Harold Shipman – my character in this is a very well-respected surgeon, so the idea of a doctor who was very loved and respected by people and who took advantage of that and was killing them, I looked at that.”

British doctor Harold Shipman was convicted in 2000 of murdering 15 patients under his care, but the true total was likely closer to 250 people. He is believed to be the most prolific serial killer in modern history, and operated undetected for years.

Sheen then also drew inspiration from Ted Bundy, an American serial killer who kidnapped, raped and murdered at least 30 girls and young women.

“Ted Bundy, who people found very charming and likeable… his biggest weapon is that he’s funny, and that people like him and warm to him and enjoy his company,” the actor said.

“And he has cultivated that because he wants people to let their defences down and if he can make you laugh, he knows he can manipulate you. He knows it’s working, and if he can get you to drop your defences he knows he can kill you a lot easier. Makes it a lot easier for him if he seduces you in that way. So he sort of developed that ability, and I thought Bundy was sort of interesting in that respect.”

In Prodigal Son, Dr Martin Whitly has a grown-up son called Malcolm Bright – played by Tom Payne – who is the show’s protagonist.

Having had his childhood torn apart by the discovery of his father’s sadistic crimes, Malcolm now works as a criminal psychologist specialising in serial killer profiling. But all these years later, he still suffers from night terrors and psychological trauma; and when people find out about his father they look at him differently.

Payne, who previously starred in The Walking Dead, spent some time getting into Malcolm’s head.

“There was a podcast which I found which was absolutely specific and relevant to the show, called Happy Face,” he revealed. “It’s this girl who is the daughter of the Happy Face Killer, in America and she travelled around meeting relatives of victims of her father, and spoke a lot about how it made her feel, and it was exactly what my character would have gone through.

“So I listened to all of that and it was really hard to listen to, and just the deep deep pain felt by her and all of the doubts that you have about yourself and whether you, any of your relative within you. It all speaks to Malcolm and, was there a trigger for his father? Was it inherent to his character? And all of these things.

“And then it also helped me to understand how the outside world views you through the lens of what your father did before you were even cognisant of being in the world, your relative has been doing all of these awful things, and then that immediately reflects upon you and people cannot help but see you as the spawn of this monster.

“So that really helped me and put me in the position of understanding it quite exactly all of the pressures that are on my character and why he changed his name and moved away in order to get some distance.”

As for why we’re fascinated with shows about serial killers, Sheen has a few theories.

“It’s probably a good idea for sheep to take an interest in wolves, because they literally prey on us – so serial killers are our predators, one of our predators,” he explains. “We’re interested in sharks, aren’t we, and we’re interested in anything that can kill us and there’s probably a good reason for that.

“Back in the day we went round campfires and told stories about wolves in the forests, because there were wolves in the forest. But they also take on a kind of bogeyman element and become a sort of folklore. So I think there’s a lot of different things going on in our being drawn to serial killers.”

And one final thought: “I think we also like to think of the dark, of a monster being there – we know that the monster is in here,” he says, patting his chest. “We know that it’s us. As well as it being the other, it’s also us as well and that is a way to engage with the darkness in us, by making it outside of ourselves.”

Prodigal Son begins on Tuesday 28th July 2020 at 9pm on Sky One and NOW TV. If you’re looking for more to watch, check out our TV Guide.

source

[suchagiantnerd]

48 Books, 1 Year

I was just two books shy of my annual goal of 50! You can blame the combination of my adorable newborn, who refused to nap anywhere except on me, and Hallmark Christmas movie season, during which I abandon books for chaste kisses between 30-somethings who behave like tweens at places called the Mistletoe Inn (which are really in Almonte, Ontario). 

Without further ado, as Zuma from Paw Patrol says, “Let’s dive in!”

1. Human Errors: A Panorama of Our Glitches, from Pointless Bones to Broken Genes / Nathan H. Lents

We have too many bones! We have to rely too much on our diet for survival! We suffer from too many cognitive biases! Reading about our design flaws was kind of interesting, but the best part of this book were the few pages toward the end about the possibility of alien life. Specifically this quote: "...some current estimates predict that the universe harbours around seventy-five million civilizations." WHAT?! This possibility more than anything else I've ever heard or read gives me a better idea of how infinite the universe really is.

2. The Fiery Cross / Diana Gabaldon

Compared to the first four books in the Outlander series, this fifth book is a real snooze. The characters are becoming more and more unlikeable. They're so self-centered and unaware of their privilege in the time and place they're living. Gabaldon's depictions of the Mohawk tribe and other First Nations characters (which I'm reading through her character's opinions of things) are pretty racist. The enslaved people at one character's plantation are also described as being well taken care of and I just.... can't. I think this is the end of my affair with Outlander.

3. Educated / Tara Westover

This memoir was a wild ride. Tara Westover grew up in a survivalist, ultra-religious family in rural Idaho. She didn’t go to school and was often mislead about the outside world by her father. She and her siblings were also routinely put in physical danger working in their father’s junkyard as their lives were “in god’s hands”, and when they were inevitably injured, they weren’t taken to the hospital or a doctor, but left to be treated by their healer mother. Thanks to her sheer intelligence and determination (and some support from her older brother), Tara goes to university and shares with us the culture shock of straddling two very different worlds. My non-fiction book club LOVED this read, we talked about it for a long, long time.

4. Imbolc: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for St. Brigid’s Day / Carl F. Neal

Continuing with my witchy education, I learned all about the first sabbat of the new year, Imbolc.

5. Super Sad True Love Story / Gary Shteyngart

This in-the-very-near-future dystopian novel got my heart racing during a few exciting moments, but overall, I couldn’t immerse myself fully because of the MISOGYNY. I think the author might not like women and the things women like (or the things he thinks they like?) In this near future, all the dudes are into finance or are media celeb wannabes, while all the women work in high-end retail. And onion-skin jeans are the new trend for women - they are essentially see-through. Gary….we don’t…want that? We don’t even want low-rise jeans to come back.

6. The Wanderers / Meg Howrey

Helen, Yoshi and Sergei are the three astronauts selected by a for-profit space exploration company to man the world’s first mission to Mars. But before they get the green light, they have to endure a 17-month simulation. In addition to getting insight into the simulation from all three astronauts via rotating narrators, we also hear from the astronauts’ family members and other employees monitoring the sim. At times tense, at times thoughtful, this book is an incisive read about what makes explorers willing to leave behind everything they love the most in the world.

7. Zone One / Colson Whitehead

The zombie apocalypse has already happened, and Mark is one of the survivors working to secure and clean up Zone One, an area of Manhattan. During his hours and hours of boring shifts populated by a few harrowing minutes here and there, the reader is privy to Mark’s memories of the apocalypse itself and how he eventually wound up on this work crew. Mark is a pretty likeable, yet average guy rather than the standard zombie genre heroes, and as a result, his experiences also feel like a more plausible reality than those of the genre.

8. Homegoing / Yaa Gyasi

One of my favourite reads of the year, this novel is the definition of “sweeping epic”. The story starts off with two half-sisters (who don’t even know about each other’s existence) living in 18th-century Ghana. One sister marries a white man and stays in Ghana, living a life of privilege, while the other is sold into slavery and taken to America on a slave ship. This gigantic split in the family tree kicks off two parallel and vastly different narratives spanning EIGHT generations, ending with two 20-somethings in the present day. I remain in awe of Gyasi’s talent, and was enthralled throughout the entire book.

9. Sweetbitter / Stephanie Danler

Tess moves to New York City right out of school (and seemingly has no ties to her previous life - this bothered me, I wanted to know more about her past) and immediately lands a job at a beloved (though a little tired) fancy restaurant. Seemingly loosely based on Danler’s own experiences as a server, I got a real feel for the insular, incestuous, chaotic life in “the industry”. Tess navigates tensions between the kitchen and the front of house, falls for the resident bad-boy bartender, and positions herself as the mentee of the older and more glamorous head server, who may not be everything she seems. This is a juicy coming-of-age novel.

10. The Autobiography of Gucci Mane / Gucci Mane and Neil Martinez-Belkin

Gucci Mane is one of Atlanta’s hottest musicians, having helped bring trap music to the mainstream. I’d never heard of him until I read this book because I’m white and old! But not knowing him didn’t make this read any less interesting. In between wild facts (if you don’t get your music into the Atlanta strip clubs, your music isn’t making it out of Atlanta) and wilder escapades (Gucci holing himself up in his studio, armed to the teeth, in a fit of paranoia one night) Gucci Mane paints on honest picture of a determined, talented artist fighting to break free of a cycle of systemic racism and poverty.

11. I’ll Be Gone in the Dark: One Woman’s Obsessive Search for the Golden State Killer / Michelle McNamara

McNamara was a journalist and true crime enthusiast who took it upon herself to try and solve the mystery of the Golden State Killer’s identity. Amazingly, her interest in this case also sparked other people’s interest in looking back at it, eventually leading to the arrest of the killer (though tragically, McNamara died a few months before the arrest and would never know how her obsession helped to capture him). This is a modern true crime classic and a riveting read.

12. A Great Reckoning / Louise Penny

The 12th novel in Penny’s Inspector Gamache mystery series sees our hero starting a new job teaching cadets at Quebec’s police academy. Of course, someone is murdered, and Gamache and his team work to dig the rot out of the institution, uncovering a killer in the process.

13. Any Man / Amber Tamblyn

Yes, this novel is by THAT Amber Tamblyn, star of “The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants”! Anyway, this book is a tad bit darker, and follows five men who’ve been victimized by the female serial rapist, who calls herself Maude. Going into this read I though that it might be some sort of revenge fantasy, but dudes, not to worry - we really feel awful for the male victims and see them in all their complexity. Perhaps, if more men read this book, they might better understand the trauma female and non-binary victims go through? That would require men to read books by women though. Guys? GUYS???

14. Ostara: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for the Spring Equinox / Kerri Connor

Yet another witchy read providing more information about this Spring sabbat. 

15. Scarborough / Catherine Hernandez

This novel takes place in OUR Scarborough! Following the lives of a number of residents (adults and children alike), the plot centres around the families attending an Ontario Early Years program as well as the program facilitator. Hernandez looks at the ways poverty, mental illness, addiction, race, and homophobia intersect within this very multicultural neighbourhood. It’s very sad, but there are also many sweet and caring moments between the children and within each of the families.

16. The Glitch / Elisabeth Cohen

Shelley Stone (kind of a fictional Sheryl Sandberg type) is the CEO of Conch, a successful Silicon Valley company. Like many of these over-the-top real-life tech execs, Shelley has a wild schedule full of business meetings, exercise, networking and parenting, leaving her almost no time to rest. While on an overseas business trip, she meets a younger woman also named Shelley Stone, who may or may not be her younger self. Is Shelley losing it? This is a dark comedy poking fun at tech start-up culture and the lie that we can have it all.

17. The Thirteenth Tale / Diane Setterfield

This is my kind of book! A young and inexperienced bookworm is handpicked to write the biography of an aging famous author, Vida Wynter. Summoned to her sprawling country home around Christmastime, the biographer is absolutely enthralled by Vida’s tales of a crumbling gothic estate and an eccentric family left too long to their own whims. Looking for a dark, twisty fairytale? This read’s for you.

18. Love & Misadventure / Lang Leav

Leav’s book of poems looked appealing, but for me, her collection fell short. I felt like I was reading a teenager’s poetry notebook (which I’m not criticizing, I love that teen girls write poetry, and surprise, surprise - so did I - but I’m too old for this kind of writing now).

19. Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows / Balli Kaur Jaswal

Hooo boy, my book club loved this one! Hoping to get a job more aligned with her literary interests, Nikki, the 20-something daughter of Indian immigrants to Britain, takes a job teaching writing at the community centre in London’s biggest Punjabi neighbourhood. The students are all older Punjabi women who don’t have much to do and because of their “widow” status have been somewhat sidelined within their community. Without anyone around to censor or judge them, the widows start sharing their own erotic fantasies with each other, each tale wilder than the last. As Nikki gets to know them better, she gains some direction in life and starts a romance of her own. (It should be noted that in addition to this lovely plot, there is a sub plot revolving around a possible honour killing in the community. For me, the juxtaposition of these two plots was odd, but not odd enough that it ruined the book.)

20. Beltane: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for May Day / Melanie Marquis

Beltane marks the start of the summer season in the witches’ year, and I learned all about how to ring it in, WITCH STYLE.

21. Summer of Salt / Katrina Leno

This book is essentially Practical Magic for teens, with a queer protagonist. All that to say, it’s enjoyable and sweet and a win for #RepresentationMatters, but it wasn’t a surprising or fresh story.

22. Too Like the Lightning / Ada Palmer

This is the first in the Terra Ignota quartet of novels, which is (I think) speculative fiction with maybe a touch of fantasy and a touch of sci-fi and a touch of theology and certainly a lot of philosophical ruminating too. I both really enjoyed it and felt so stupid while reading it. As a lifelong bookworm who doesn’t shy away from difficult reads, I almost never feel stupid while reading, but this book got me. The world building is next level and as soon as you think you’ve found your footing, Palmer pulls the rug out from under you and you’re left both stunned and excited about her latest plot twist. Interested in finding out what a future society grouped into ‘nations’ by interests and passions (instead of geographical borders and ethnicity) might be like? Palmer takes a hearty stab at it here.

23. The Trauma Cleaner: One Woman’s Extraordinary Life in the Business of Death, Decay and Disaster / Sarah Krasnostein

When Sarah Krasnostein met Sandra Pankhurst, she knew she had to write her biography (or something like it - this book is part biography, part love letter, part reckoning). And rightly so, as Sandra has led quite a life. She grew up ostracized within her own home by her immediate family, married and had children very young, came out as a trans woman and begin living as her authentic self (but abandoning her own young family in the process), took to sex work and lived through a vicious assault, married again, and started up her own successful company cleaning uncleanable spaces - the apartments of hoarders, the houses of recluses, the condos in which people ended their own lives. Sandra is the definition of resilience, but all her traumas (both the things people have done to her and the things she’s done to others) have left their mark, as Krasnostein discovers as she delicately probes the recesses of Sandra’s brain.

24. Becoming / Michelle Obama

My favourite things about any memoir from an ultra-famous person are the random facts that surprise you along the way. In this book, it was learning that all American presidents travel with a supply of their blood type in the event of an assassination attempt. I mean OF COURSE they would, but that had never occurred to me. I also appreciated Michelle opening up about her fertility struggles, the difficult decision to put her career on hold to support Barack’s dreams, and the challenge of living in the spotlight with two young children that you hope to keep down to earth. Overall, I think Michelle was as candid as someone in her position can be at this point in her life.

25 and 26. Seven Surrenders, The Will to Battle / Ada Palmer

I decided to challenge myself and stick with Palmer’s challenging Terra Ignota series, also reading the second and third instalments (I think the fourth is due to be released this year). I don’t know what to say, other than the world-building continues to be incredible and this futuristic society is on the bring of something entirely new.

27. Even Vampires Get the Blues / Kate MacAlister

This novel wins for “cheesiest read of the year”. When a gorgeous half-elf detective (you read that right) meets a centuries-old sexy Scottish vampire, sparks fly! Oh yeah, and they’re looking for some ancient thing in between having sex.

28. A Case of Exploding Mangoes / Mohammed Hanif

A piece of historical fiction based on the real-life suspicious plane crash in 1988 that killed many of Pakistan’s top military brass, this novel lays out many possible culprits (including a crow that ate too many mangoes). It’s a dark comedy taking aim at the paranoia of dictators and the boredom and bureaucracy of the military (and Bin Laden makes a cameo at a party).

29. Salvage the Bones / Jesmyn Ward

This novel takes place in the steaming hot days before Hurricane Katrina hits the Mississippi coast. The air is still and stifling and Esch’s life in the small town of Bois Sauvage feels even more stifled. Esch is 14 and pregnant and hasn’t told anyone yet. Her father is a heavy drinker and her three brothers are busy with their own problems. But as the storm approaches, the family circles around each other in preparation for the storm. This is a jarring and moving read made more visceral by the fact that the author herself survived Katrina. It’s also an occasionally violent book, and there are particularly long passages about dog-fighting (a hobby of one of the brothers). The dog lovers in my book club found it hard to get through, consider this your warning!

30. Everything’s Trash, But It’s Okay / Phoebe Robinson

A collection of essays in the new style aka writing multiple pages on a topic as though you were texting your best friend about it (#ImFineWithThisNewStyleByTheWay #Accessible), Robinson discusses love, friendship, being a Black woman in Hollywood, being plus-ish-size in Hollywood, and Julia Roberts teaching her how to swim (and guys, Julia IS as nice in real life as we’d all hoped she was!) Who is Robinson? Comedy fans will likely know her already, but I only knew her as one of the stars of the Netflix film Ibiza (which I enjoyed). This is a fun, easy read!

31. Midsummer: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for Litha / Deborah Blake

After reading this book, I charged my crystals under the midsummer sun!

32. Fingersmith / Sarah Waters

So many twists! So many turns! So many hidden motives and long-held secrets! Think Oliver Twist meets Parasite meets Lost! (Full disclosure, I haven’t seen Parasite yet, I’m just going off all the chatter about it). Sue is a con artist orphan in old-timey London. When the mysterious “Gentleman” arrives at her makeshift family’s flat with a proposal for the con of all cons, Sue is quickly thrust into a role as the servant for another young woman, Maud, living alone with her eccentric uncle in a country estate. As Sue settles into her act, the lines between what she’s pretending at and what she’s really feeling start to blur, and nothing is quite what it seems. This book is JUICY!

33. Rest Play Grow: Making Sense of Preschoolers (Or Anyone Who Acts Like One) / Deborah MacNamara, PhD

I read approximately one parenting book a year, and this was this year’s winner. As my eldest approached her third birthday, we started seeing bigger and bigger emotions and I wasn’t sure how to handle them respectfully and gently. This book gave me a general roadmap for acknowledging her feelings, sitting through them with her, and the concept of “collecting” your child to prevent tantrums from happening or to help calm them down afterward. I’ll be using this approach for the next few years!

34. Lughnasadh: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for Lammas / Melanie Marquis

And with this read, I’ve now read about the entire witch’s year. SO MOTE IT BE.

35. In Cold Blood / Truman Capote

How had I not read this until now? This true-crime account that kicked off the modern genre was rich in detail, compassionate to the victims, and dug deep into the psyche of the killers. The descriptions of the midwest countryside and the changing seasons also reminded me of Keith Morrison’s voiceovers on Dateline. Is Capote his inspiration?

36. I’m Afraid of Men / Vivek Shraya

A quick, short set of musings from trans musician and writer Shraya still packs an emotional punch. She writes about love and loss, toxic masculinity, breaking free of gender norms, and what it’s like to exist as a trans woman.

37. The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You / Elaine N. Aron, PhD

Having long thought I might be a highly sensitive person (lots of us are!), I decided to learn more about how to better cope with stressful situations when I don’t have enough alone time or when things are too loud or when I get rattled by having too much to do any of the other myriad things that shift me into panic mode. Though some of the advice is a bit too new-agey for me (talking to your inner child, etc), some of it was practical and useful.

38. Swamplandia! / Karen Russell

The family-run alligator wrestling theme park, Swamplandia, is swimming in debt and about to close. The widowed father leaves the everglades for the mainland in a last-ditch attempt to drum up some money, leaving the three children to fend for themselves. A dark coming-of-age tale that blends magic realism, a ghost story, the absurd and a dangerous boat trip to the centre of the swamplands, this novel examines a fractured family mourning its matriarch in different ways.

39. A Mind Spread Out on the Ground / Alicia Elliott

This is a beautiful collection of personal essays brimming with vulnerability, passion, and fury. Elliott, the daughter of a Haudenosaunee father and a white mother, shares her experiences growing up poor in a family struggling with mental illness, addiction and racism. Topics touch on food scarcity, a never-ending battle with lice, parenthood and the importance of hearing from traditionally marginalized voices in literature. 

40. Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay / Elena Ferrante

The third novel in Ferrante’s Neapolitan quartet sees Elena and Lila move from their early twenties into their thirties and deal with a riot of issues - growing careers, changing political beliefs, the challenges of motherhood and romantic relationships, and existing as strong-willed, intelligent women in 1960s and 70s Italy. I’ll definitely finish the series soon.

41. Half-Blood Blues / Esi Edugyan

A small group of American and German jazz musicians working on a record find themselves holed up in Paris as the Germans begin their occupation in WW2. Hiero, the youngest and most talented member of the group, goes out one morning for milk and is arrested by the Germans, never to be heard from again. Fifty years later, the surviving members of the band go to Berlin for the opening night of a documentary about the jazz scene from that era, and soon find themselves on a road trip through the European countryside to find out what really became of Hiero all those years ago. Edugyan’s novel is a piercing examination of jealousy, ambition, friendship, race and guilt. And features a cameo by Louis Armstrong!

42. A Serial Killer’s Daughter: My Story of Faith, Love and Overcoming / Kerri Rawson

So Brad and I had just finished watching season 2 of Mindhunter, and as I browse through a neighbourhood little library, I spot this book and the serial killer in question is the BTK Killer! Naturally, I had to read it. What I didn’t realize is that this is actually a Christian book, so Rawson does write a lot about struggling with her belief in God and finding her way back to Him, etc. But there are also chapters more fitting with the true crime and memoir genres that I equally enjoyed and was creeped out by.

43. The Night Ocean / Paul La Farge

This is another book that made me feel somewhat stupid as a reader. I just know there are details or tidbits that completely went over my head that would likely enrich a better reader’s experience. In broad strokes, the novel is about a failed marriage between a psychiatrist and a writer who became dangerously obsessed with H.P. Lovecraft and the rumours that swirled around him and his social circle. The writer’s obsession takes him away from his marriage and everything else, and eventually it looks like he ends his own life. The psychiatrist is doubtful (no body was found) and she starts to follow him down the same rabbit hole. At times tense, at times funny, at times sad, I enjoyed the supposed world of Lovecraft and his fans and peers, but again, I’m sure there are deeper musings here that I couldn’t reach.

44. Glass Houses / Louise Penny

The 13th novel in Penny’s Inspector Gamache mystery series sees our hero taking big risks to fight the opioid crisis in Quebec. He and his team focus on catching the big crime boss smuggling drugs across the border from Vermont, endangering his beloved town of Three Pines in the process. 

45. The Bone Houses / Emily Lloyd-Jones

My Halloween read for the year, this dark fairytale of a YA novel was perfect for the season. Since her parents died, Ryn has taken over the family business - grave digging - to support herself and her siblings. As the gravedigger, she knows better than most that due to an old curse, the dead in the forest surrounding her village don’t always stay dead. But as more of the forest dead start appearing (and acting more violently than usual), Ryn and an unexpected companion (yes, a charming young man cause there’s got to be a romance!) travel to the heart of the forest to put a stop to the curse once and for all.

46. The Witches Are Coming / Lindy West

Another blazing hot set of essays from my favourite funny feminist take on Trump, abortion rights, #MeToo, and more importantly Adam Sandler and Dateline. As always, Lindy, please be my best friend?

47. Know My Name / Chanel Miller

This memoir is HEAVY but so, so needed. Recently, Chanel Miller decided to come forward publicly and share that she was the victim of Brock Turner’s sexual assault. She got the courage to do so after she posted her blistering and beautiful victim impact statement on social media and it went viral. Miller’s memoir is a must-read, highlighting the incredible and awful lengths victims have to go to to see any modicum of justice brought against their attackers. Miller dealt with professional ineptitude from police and legal professionals, victim-blaming, victim-shaming, depression and anxiety, the inability to hold down a job, and still managed to come out the other side of this trial intact. And in the midst of all the horror, she writes beautifully about her support system - her family, boyfriend and friends - and about the millions of strangers around the world who saw themselves in her experience.

48. Christmas Ghost Stories: A Collection of Winter Tales / Mark Onspaugh

Ghosts AND Christmas? Yes please! This quirky collection features a wide array of festively spooky tales. You want the ghost of Anne Boleyn trapped in a Christmas ornament? You got it! What about the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future drinking together in a bar? Yup, that’s here too! 

__

So, what were my top picks of the year, the books that stuck with me the most? In no particular order:

Educated

Homegoing

The Wanderers

Know My Name

Scarborough

[dinosthoughtsandreviews]

Billy Elliot review

Billy Elliot is a British social realism drama/dance movie, directed by Stephen Daldry and written by Lee Hall. It was released in 2000 and the leading actor is Jamie Bell who embodies the character of William Billy Elliot, along with Gary Lewis who plays the role of his father Jackie, Jamie Draven as his brother Tony, and Julie Walters who plays Mrs Sandra Wilkinson, Billy’s ballet teacher as supporting actors. It is an inspiring tale of pursuing dreams, breaking conventions and stereotypes, and struggling. The plot of the movie is set in 1984-85 in a town on the north-east of England called Everington at the time of the coal miners’ strike.

The plot of the movie revolves around the titular character, Billy Elliot (Jamie Bell), who, after witnessing a dance class which was held in the same gym as his boxing class, he decides he wants do dance as well. The ballet teacher, Mrs Wilkinson (Julie Walters), sees something in Billy, a spark and stature of a true dancer, and wants him to continue practicing with the girls. This, however, does not bode well with Billy's father, Jackie (Gary Lewis), who thinks dancing is for girls and that his son should do what „lads do; football... boxing... or wrestling.“ Whether this conflict resolves itself, you'll have to see for yourself, but it is a fascinating portrayal of struggle, both Billy's and of the Elliot family. Speaking of his family's struggle, another plot that is unfolding throughout the movie is that of a miner's strike setting in a town of Durham County in which both Elliot's father and Elliot's brother, Tony (Jamie Draven), participate. Their struggle is that of an everyday family, and is what puts this movie into the social realism genre.

What really impressed me while watching the movie is how easily we can relate to, or empathize with pretty much all the characters. Billy is a kid who just wants to feel happy and free, and to do what he loves. His father and brother are good people, members of the lower middle-class who struggle with unemployment, and just want to provide a good life for Billy. Even Billy’s friend, Michael Caffrey (Stuart Wells), who we find out is gay is also a likeable character, and we can see that being gay is something that comes naturally to young adolescents, and the movie did not make a big deal out of it. The characters may find it odd, but they all quickly accept it. The situations in which Billy sees that Michael fancies wearing dresses and puts make-up on his face, or when he kisses Billy and when Debbie and Billy spend time alone in her room and she speaks of her parents not having sex, later on having an intense situation of their own, all show how children tend more towards accepting differences than the adults. It is seen everywhere in the world. Children and young adults are more open to experimenting and prone to accepting diversity in oppose to adults who are too bound by rules and tradition. Billy is stunned by seeing his best friend in girls’ clothes but he accepts it. He is teaching us all a lesson that we should accept people as they are without judging them. An interesting part of the movie is the discourse of what is masculine and what is not. At one point, Billy asks Michael whether it is better to be a miner or a dancer, questioning if he is doing not the wrong but the manly thing. His father and his brother, and the rest of the men in Everington are miners, raging on the streets during the strike, portraying the men who fight, who want change and do not fear anything. And then there is Billy, wanting to be a “swan”. Another aspect in the movie that I found interesting was that Billy did not have a mother, and that really influenced him. He was a young person, growing up surrounded by aggressive men. The only woman near him was his grandmother, but she could not take care of him because she could not even take care of herself (we see her wandering on the graveyard, not able to find her daughter’s grave). The only woman that helped Billy, and ultimately changed his future, was Mrs. Wilkinson. A woman with her own problems- not fulfilling the dream of becoming a professional ballet dancer and having marriage problems, decides to help Billy get away from it all, from the grim everyday in that town, people full of prejudice and no understanding for others.

When it comes to technicalities, the highlight of the movie is the superb acting by all of the actors, especially Jamie Bell, and when you add all the dancing he has done in the movie, you have to give the boy some credit. Since dancing is one of the key elements of the movie, the choreography team had a lot to do, and it all paid out wonderfully since everything is easier when you have an actor who already had dancing lessons beforehand. Staying true to the classic British cinema, the movie doesn’t have any special effects added to it, emphasizing the social realism in the movie. The colour palette of the movie might seem monotonous at times, since the movie is set in England, a country known for its rainy and bleak weather, but it adds to the atmosphere of the movie, and the struggle of Billy’s family. Another thing that added to the experience are the songs used in various scenes where Billy is dancing; “I love to boogie” and “Children of Revolution” by T. Rex, “Burning Up” by Eagle Eye Cherry, and many more, are a welcome treat to all music lovers, and it adds another fine layer to the character of Billy Elliot. They are all upbeat songs, made to make you want to dance, and you will definitely catch yourself tapping your foot or nodding your head while watching the movie.

This movie also deals with many social issues, such as difference between the classes (working class and the upper class), gender equality, sexuality, breaking stereotypes, etc. Billy’s father and brother both represent the working class, and the struggles of being expendable. Billy’s father even goes against his own ideals later in the film (working in the mines despite of the strike) in order to help Billy follow his dream. It’s a struggle many of us faced at least once in our life, trying to do the right thing while not knowing what the right thing is. Billy represents a noble notion of gender equality, being able to do what you want and love without being judged on trivial matters such as femininity and masculinity. When it comes to sexuality, I already mentioned Billy’s friend, Michael, is gay, and the movie does not make a big deal out of it. Sure, the reveal of it was strange for the characters, since they did not expect it, but they all learn to accept and respect it, especially Billy, who didn’t have any gripes with the fact.

All in all, the movie is fantastic and worth watching, and deserves all the praise it has received. I usually do not watch this kind of movies, but it is certainly a jewel in the British contemporary cinema. It stands as a timeless reminder that we, as human beings, need to learn to accept each other, and to celebrate diversity. I give the movie a 7.5/10 for its superb acting, and thought-provoking themes. If you like realistic everyday/everyman movies, where you don’t know whether the ending will be a happy or a sad one, this is the movie for you. If it isn’t your type of a movie, it is still worth watching, as it will not leave you indifferent.

          Sources:

Billy Elliot. Dir. Stephen Daldry. Writ. Lee Hall. Perf. Jamie Bell, Gary Lewis, Jamie Draven, Julie Walters, et al. Universal Pictures, 2000.