#(completely ignoring the option of getting them there because i know I'll be too intimidated to enter any stores

[tardis--dreams]

I applaud the online shop who managed to completely mess up the vans size system and delivering me a size 39 instead of my 40.5 which i ordered ♡

[shortjohnred]

Slay the Hollow: Voices as MCs

WARRING: This blog might contains spoilers for both Scarlet Hollow and Slay the Princess. You have been warned.

I'm a huge fan of Black Tabby Games' Slay the Princess. A lot of people have talked about this game in detail but not nearly enough have discussed it's equally excellent sister game Scarlet Hollow. So, to show my appreciation for both games, I came up with a fun little idea: what if the voices of Slay the Princess were main characters in Scarlet Hollow!

For those who don't know, in StP, you acquire different voices based on your choices through out the game. And in SH, you can choose two out of seven traits that unlock new dialogue options and give you abilities that can help out in certain situations, and depending on what trait you have you can completely circumvent certain choices.

In this blog, I will combine both games by making the voices the main characters they were always destined to be by giving them what traits I think they'd have.

Some rules first:

1: I will not be including the Hero nor the Narrator. The Hero because honestly, I feel like this personality isn't super consistent between routes. As for the Narrator, he's kinda hard to pin down. Besides, the game makes it pretty clear that he's different from the other voices so I don't really see any reason to include him.

Just so we're clear, our voices are the Stubborn, Broken, Cold, Paranoid, Cheated, Hunted, Opportunist, Contrarian, Skeptic, and the Smitten.

2: Each voice ONLY gets two traits, just like the game (and NO, hardcore mode does NOT count)

Here's a list of the traits and what they do:

Powerful Build: Makes you buff and athletic, gives you a greater appetite, and makes you more intimidating.

Mystical: Gives you a sixth sense when it comes to the supernatural, and makes you kinda weird.

Talk to Animals: This one is self-explanatory.

Street Smart; Makes you good at lying while being able to spot liars, you can better read people, and you can pick locks.

Keen Eye: Makes you more observant and pick up on small details that most would overlook.

Book Smart: Gives you and encyclopedic knowledge on various topics and you can read faster.

Hot: Makes you physically attractive, an adept flirt, and gives you an aura of charm that makes people like you by default.

3: I can't give two or more voices the same two traits. This one is here just to make things more interesting and to avoid repetition.

With that out of the way, let's get to the list!

Stubborn: Powerful Build + Talk to Animals

I'll be honest, I couldn't really think of a good build for the Stubborn. I definitely feel like Powerful Build alone fits him best due to his single desire to fight, but none of the other traits really fit him as well. Mystical: never gave me that impression. Street Smart: some have suggested this, one however I disagree, a key word they overlook in Street Smart is "Smart", and frankly, the Stubborn is an idiot. Keen Eye: he doesn't seem very observant (doesn't help that there's only one thing on his mind). Book Smart: same logic as Street Smart. Hot: I mean, I guess he's kinda of a flirt in the Razor but he doesn't come across as charming.

I chose Talk to Animals because it technically effects gameplay the least. Even if you try to ignore them the other traits will pop up and effect gameplay whether or not you want them too, while you can completely ignore Talk to Animals (just because you can hear what they doesn't mean you have to acknowledge them). If anything, Stubborn would probably consider this trait to be more of a distraction than anything else, but at least it's a manageable one, where the others are not.

I imagine that Stubborn would be a hardass that's impossible to get along with as he's the type who solves all his problems by either punching or yelling at them (sometimes both) and always gets straight to the point, never wasting time on questions. He'd probably develop an obsession with Wayne due to his confrontational nature, taking every opportunity to fight him. And much like the Adversary or the Razor, he might even grow attached to Wayne, even going as far as to attack Reese because Wayne is HIS rival and no one else can take that from him. Whether or not this obsession would turn into romance, I'm honestly not sure, let me know what you think about that.

Broken: Mystical + Talk to Animals

I gave the Broken these two traits because I believe both together would make him miserable. Being able to see and hear things that no one else can sounds absolutely maddening. I think Mystical fits him due to his connection to the Tower, while the Cage shows us a more empathic side to him so I figured with Talk to Animals he's give the creatures of Scarlet Hollow a voice (basically, he'd be more open about this power than the others).

I imagine that he was bullied a lot as kid for his strangeness and his only friends were animals. He's very subservient to beings he sees as being above him and lacks any agency, so he'd blindly listen to people like Tabitha and Sybil without question while being viewed as a weak willed coward by others. He'd also feel tremendous guilt for the major choices of episodes 1 and 2 so he'd try make the ultimate sacrifice in episode 3 (whether or not Tabitha lets him do that depends on their relationship).

Cold: Mystical + Keen Eye

The Cold is the embodiment of apathy. To me, he definitely gives off a Mystical sort of vibe as he was able to keep Quiet sane during the Moment of Clarity, and because he doesn't waste time on concepts like emotions he's a bit more observant than some of the other voices.

Like in StP, the only thing he cares about is seeing something new. So he'd probably just go where ever the wind takes him and follows others lead. Others would have a hard time getting along with him due to his apathetic (and sometimes downright rude) nature. Though he might develop a sort of kinship with Sybil, but unlike the Broken, instead of seeing her as someone above him, he sees her as someone who's kinda like him, someone who sees the world for what he believes it truly is rather than what others perceive it to be. And kinda like Stubborn he'd rather get to the point than waste time with questions.

Paranoid: Mystical + Book Smart

I gave him Mystical because it is sorta like a less cool version of Spidey Sense, and the Paranoid is always looking out for danger, hell, it might even be the reason he's so "Paranoid". As for Book Smart, I didn't originally come up with this one, that was the idea of @salty-an-disco, so I wanna thank them for inspiring me. And thinking about it, it makes sense as Paranoid actually seems pretty intuitive, he's the only reason why Quiet was able to survive being near the Nightmare by manually operating his autonomic nervous system, there's only one other voice who can do something like that and I also gave him the Book Smart trait (but you'll have to get though the rest of this to learn who).

As for how I imagine him being in SH, he's someone who is ruled by fear. He doesn't trust anyone, yet alone someone he just met, and even less of a long-lost cousin who only NOW decided to get in contact with him only to invite him to funeral of a woman who has it out for his recently deceased mother. He's untrusting of everyone he comes across in Scarlet Hollow (even if he has no reason to be so suspicious of them) and questions everything he's told.

Cheated: Mystical + Street Smart

I swear, this is the LAST voice with the Mystical trait! As for the reason I gave it to the Cheated is the same as the Paranoid. But unlike Paranoid, instead of fear, he's ruled by spite, so instead of logic, he tries to understand how people work, hence the Street Smart trait (another idea of @salty-an-disco).

I imagine either him or his mom is/was a gambler, but one bad gamble ruined their lives (or just his) and combined with Vivian's hospital bills put him in massive dept. He probably feels a strong envy towards Tabitha because she inherited the family coal mine and lives in a big house while he recently lost his job and got evicted from his apartment (and he assumes she didn't give the estate proper maintenance just to insult him, and if that sounds like a leap in logic to you that's because it is). He keeps his cards close to his chest, doesn't let his guard down around anyone, and tries to see all the possible angles.

Hunted: Talk to Animals + Keen Eye

The Hunted tries to think like an animal, so why not give him the ability to Talk to Animals? And while I wouldn't say he's really "smart" he does seem pretty observant like how he was able to tell the Narrator was afraid and in the Den he figured out that the mirror was just an illustration based on the wind.

To the Hunted, survival is all that matters, and he's not going save anyone unless it's convenient for him (though he's gladly save Gretchen over Duke), so if someone's in danger it's their fault for putting themselves in it instead of running away way when they had the chance or trust the warnings they've been given. But while he won't go rescue anyone himself he'll at least try to warn them of the danger, whether or not they'll listen to him is not his problem.

Opportunist: Street Smart + Hot

Some of these were pretty hard to figure out, but this one was surprisingly easy. The Opportunist is a manipulative being with only one goal: being on top. For some of these it's not really a matter of them actually having these traits, but rather which would they choose for themselves. Opportunist will gladly to lie and charm his way though any problem and doesn't show his true colors unless he thinks he's on top, like how in the Princess and the Dragon he was more than willing to kill the Princess knowing Quiet was inside of her, but when Quiet returned to his body he suddenly tried act like he was always on his side, but truthfully the only side he's on is his own.

That would also be the case in SH, always trying to butter up everyone just to stab them in the back the moment it's convenient for him. He would regularly lie to and flirt with people just to get them to trust him and would always invite Tabitha to events and take her side because she's the one with the most sway in Scarlet Hollow (but he's gladly stab her in the back the moment he gets the chance). I wonder how long he'd be able to keep this up before the others catch on.

Contrarian: Powerful Build + Street Smart

Remember how I said the Opportunist was easy to figure out? Well, the Contrarian is the opposite, as it was really hard to come up with something that made sense, and even now I'm unsure if this build really works for him. I'm fairly certain Street Smart is a good fit for him because it's useful for causing mischief, but I'm not confident in the other one.

I considered swapping Powerful Build for Talk to Animals since it's unexpected and Contrarian is all about doing the opposite of what you expect, plus, it would allow him to meet the goat. But I didn't because 1: outside of those two things there's really no reason to give him that trait, and 2: that would mean four out of the ten voices would have Talk to Animals, and that's already a problem with the Mystical trait and I want to have at least some variety.

The evidence for giving him Powerful Build are, 1: a running joke with the Contrarian is that he wants Quiet to throw the blade out the window and while I don't think an action like that requires much effort successfully throwing and object out a window does require at least some strength, 2: in the Fury he convinced Stubborn that they don't need the blade to Slay the Princess and depending on your choices he was right, 3: in the Apotheosis he helped Quiet throw the blade right into her eye, 4: in No Way Out, he made Quiet throw the blade out the window without the player's input and it's my belief that if a voice can successfully take control of Quiet's body despite resistance and without the help of the other voices must have some level of strength which is a logic I will use for another voice, and 5: during the end of the Razor he seem confident that Quiet could throw her out the window despite how big she's become. The only thing I don't like about this is the idea of Contrarian being buff (at the same time it's also not something you'd expect)

I imagine his relationship with Tabitha would be similar to the Narrator as he would like getting on her nerves, but not for any malicious reason but rather because it's fun for him. He'd have an appreciation for Tabitha (even if she doesn't feel the same way about him) and would have the best relationship with Stella as the two have a few things in common, she'd be the only one he wouldn't mess with.

Skeptic: Keen Eye + Book Smart

The Skeptic was another easy one for me. Like the Paranoid he's a very analytical mind, but while Paranoid is ruled by fear, Skeptic is ruled by logic, plus, he's the only other voice that seems to have some measure of control over Quiet's body, the difference being that while Paranoid manipulated his ANS to keep him alive, Skeptic was able to shut off his heart when he refused to slay himself. It's no wonder why they worked together so well in the Cage, and speaking of the Cage, he was kinda obsessed with data points in that route. Along with a more logical mind he's also observant as in the Prisoner he pointed out the empty chain and after slaying her was the only one who noticed that something had happened to the outside world before Quite even opened the door.

Like in StP he would be very logical wouldn't trust what's he's told unless it made sense to him or could be proven true. He would greatly distrust Tabitha, Sybil, Wayne, and Dr. Kelly as their the kind of people who would "talk in circles" which he absolutely hates. He also wouldn't trust Stella or Reese, but not because he dislikes them. In the case of Stella, it's because she's proven to be capable of lying, is incredibly reckless, and chooses to believe in cryptids over a more plausible answer like mountain lions. And as for Reese, it's because there's something about him that puts him off but can't say what exactly (a fear that would be justified in episode 4). Kaneeka would be one of the only people in Scarlet Hollow he would trust as in his mind she's one of the few in town with her head screwed on right and because she's also a skeptic, and not only that, she might be the one to help him get over some of his old biases (or maybe I'm the biased one because Kaneeka's my favorite, who can say?)

Smitten: Powerful Build + Hot

The Hot trait is perfect for SH players who want a little romance on their journey, and while it's not necessary for romance it does makes things a little easier, and I know the Smitten would capitalize on this if given the chance. Sure, he's not subtle about it, but he's the only voice that explicitly shows romantic interest in the Princess. And he can be pretty smooth at times like how he knew how to gain the Thorn's trust and kiss her. As for Powerful Build, there are a few reasons, 1: he seems like the type who would sweep someone off their feet (and people can be pretty heavy), 2: when combined with the Hot trait it gives you himbo dialogue which I think works for Smitten since the Princess is the only thing on his mind, and 3: he has the ability to completely control Quiet's body.

What I mean by that last one is that he's probably the only voice who can completely take over Quiet's body without help and despite Quiet's protests. He's made Quiet self-destruct in both of the Damsel's chapter 3s (making him stab himself in the Grey and ripping his chest open in Happily Ever After) even when the Narrator, Hero and Quiet himself told him no, the only other voice who could probably do something like this is the Contrarian, but he only does it briefly. The only other voice who kills Quiet is Skeptic but he can only use the blade if Quiet let's him, otherwise he'll shut off his heart instead. As for other voices who tried to take control of Quiet, when the Narrator tried to take control Quiet was able to fight back, when Broken tried taking control the Hero was able to rest control away from him, and Opportunist was only able to take control when Quiet was outside of his body, and when he returned Opportinist was helpless to whatever Quiet decided. And I'm pretty sure most of the other voices like the Stubborn, Paranoid, Cheated, and Hunted would take control if they could but they don't (I don't think Cold would care to do this even if he could).

I'm fairly confident about my trait choices, however, I'm struggling to figure out who Smitten would fall for. Obviously he's going to have a romance arc in this game, the question is "with who"? None of the existing romance options are similar enough to the Princess to say definitively who he would romance. If you have a guess of your own there are eight romance options, five the game's page will tell you about: Stella, Kaneeka, Oscar, Reese, and Avery, and three they won't tell you about: Wayne, Dr. Kelly, and Sybil. Please share your answers with me, I'd love to hear them! As for my guess, I'd say Reese because in a way he's the closest to the Princess, he has a similar disposition to the Thorn, like the Princess he's also trapped in a basement (kinda), he appears fragile, seems like a genuinely nice person like the Damsel, and much like the Princess as a whole he has the power of transformation (minus the thing about perception) being able to turn into a monster as well as control the environment around him, and I know Smitten isn't turned off by sharp teeth or any other freaky features as he still loves the Princess even as the Fury and Razor. But that's all just a guess and I'm not 100% sure of this. Again, if you have your own answer, do let me know.

And that's all ten voices! Like I said at the beginning I won't be doing the Narrator nor the Hero, and for the Princess and her multitudes, NOPE, that is a very daunting task and this list was hard enough as is. Finally, most of this is just my opinion, if you have a different list in mind feel free to share it. And thank you for taking the time to read this, that means a lot. bye!

[erensrag]

bimbo!reader x judgmental nerd eren

eren x y/n (wc: 3173)

warnings: nswf, slut shaming, slight dubious consent

i don’t think i did this correctly….

"no please, take your time. it's not like we've been here for hours." eren's sharp voice brings you out of your thoughts.

his piercing gaze is right there to meet yours when you finally stop staring at the wall. you chew on your pencil, quickly diverting your attention to the paper in front of you. you've done your best to avoid looking at him the majority of the time you've been here.

it's not your fault you can't look into his eyes for longer than a second. he's the one who's always observing you with that cold, calculating stare. you've been on the end of judgmental looks and not so quiet whispers for years now and have learned to not let them bother you—well you thought you mastered the art of simply ignoring those kinds of people. until eren.

you didn't even know he existed until a few weeks ago. the introduction for you two consisted of a simple bumping into each other in the crowded hallways of school, it ended with him bitterly muttering something about idiot cheerleaders as he stumbled away. not even sparing you a second glance. after that, you saw him often and he made his dislike for you evidently clear.

which makes no sense. how can someone not like you?

it's usually jealous girls giving you the stink eye and making up the ridiculous rumors. they're the ones who don't want to associate themselves with you. not nerdy nobodies who can't walk without stumbling over their own two feet. no, people like him usually worship the ground you walk on. or at least drool a little.

seriously you've tried everything to get rid of that menacing stare and frigid tone he always greets you with. it's like he's immune. "jesus y/n, how dumb are you?"

and they definitely don't talk to you like that. you know you're not the brightest, which is why your teacher got this jerk of a nerd to tutor you right before exam week but is that really an excuse for him to treat you like this? biting the inside of your cheek, you nudge a corner of your sweater until your left shoulder is exposed. leaning forward and batting your eyelashes which gets no response from him other than a blank stare. "i'm not dumb. i just don't get it." you pout. "can't you just tell me the answer? we've spent like thirty minutes on this question."

"thirty minutes cause you're an idiot." he mutters more to himself.

"i'm trying my best!"

"you should've learned this months ago. you would've if you didn't spend your time skipping class to hang out with your pig muscle boyfriend."

"he's not my boyfriend..." you go back to chewing on the pencil.

"so you just make out with any guy behind the bleachers?"

"you seem to know a lot about me." you look at him again, that stupid cold stare looking back at you through those glasses.

"who doesn't. you're y/n. the whole school knows of your...activities."

"those are just rumors." some of them are. most are true. you enjoy living life to the fullest. it's not your fault the people in your school saw a confident, attractive woman and instantly decided to put less than appealing labels on her. "and besides they're none of your business."

"whatever. just solve this, this is taking longer than our usual sessions and my mom will be home soon."

you groan, looking down at the textbooks and not understanding a single word. “please just tell me the answers.” you ask one last time, desperate.

“no.”

you huff, returning your attention to the book. “you’re going to age badly with all that scowling you do. just so you know.”

“shut up.”

"eren..." you say after five minutes which causes a frustrated sigh to leave his lips. "do you have an issue with me?" it's been four sessions of the frigid tension he always puts between you two and there's a lot more to come before graduation so you just want to get whatever problems he has with you out of the way.

it takes a few seconds before he's looking up from the textbook, pushing his glasses up as he sends you probably the most intimidating glare you've seen from him. "excuse me?" the very tone of his voice has goosebumps forming on your skin but you force yourself to stand your ground. you're not going to let some loser who's probably never even kissed someone to look down on you.

"you— you just seem to—"

"i don't have an issue with you y/n." he slams the book on the table causing you to jump. "having an issue with someone like you would imply i care enough and trust me i'll never care for such a ditzy little slut who doesn't respect herself."

you've been called worse than that and usually by scorned boys you hooked up with. but they were popular gym rats, not some overconfident lanky freak. you had a snarky reply on the tip of your tongue but with the cogs in your brain suddenly malfunctioning, you could only stutter out a pathetic, "i—i'm none of those things!"

"really?" he scoffs, actually getting up and walking over and as he does you think maybe it would've been a safer option to just keep your mouth shut. "wide doe eyes without nothing behind them. check." he starts. "plump lips perfect for what you do best. check." and the asshole has the nerve to slowly swipe his fingers across your bottom lip.

you should stand up, tell him to go to hell and get out of here but you're frozen. limbs not moving an inch as he continues, "empty little head. check. skimpy outfits to attract attention. check. i mean let's face the facts.."

you never would've thought the loser that always sits in the back of the class with his nose buried deep in a book would speak like this to you. it's insulting. freaking degrading. he knows nothing about you and yet he has that expression on his face like he does. "if i'm such a ditzy little slut as you so nicely put then i'd be jumping at the chance to hook up with you but here we are." you seethe.

that seems to finally strike a nerve as he scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest. you cut him off before he can defend himself.

"is that it...you're angry i haven't made a move on you because that's what sluts do isn't it? bone everything they see? is your pride wounded that i don't see you in that way, eren?" you let out a mirthless laugh. "well news flash, pretty girls like me don't go for freaks like you."

you got up, ready to grab your things and run out all while trying to ignore the nerves inside of you. he just stands there, rigid and glaring. "really?" he asks once your books are back in your bag.

"y—yes. now if you'll excuse me—" your wrist is being grabbed before you can take another step and for a second both of you are stunned, you mostly frozen in your spot because this creep has the audacity to touch you after everything he just said. you don't know what his excuse is but he only stands there like a shocked puppy before pushing you on the desk.

a gasp escapes your lips at being manhandled by him  of all people, what the fuck is he doing? you're on your stomach, feet on the ground as the fucker puts a hand on your back, keeping you there. "w-what are you doing?" you pant out, bewildered at everything that just happened.

"i..." he trails off, not saying anything before manhandling you again. only this time it's for you to lay on your back and fuck, you could fight back. he's surprisingly strong for such a lanky freak but you're a cheerleader who does complex moves out on the field almost every day. you could kick him off, slam that big textbook in his face to the point his nose breaks and run out, making sure to report him.

but you don't. it's not that you can't. for some reason, you just don't want to. maybe it's curiosity, to see what exactly he plans on doing. to see if a loser like him actually has the balls to do anything but back away and apologize profusely.

"you're not fighting back." he simply says, sounding a bit confused as he comes to lean over your body. his hands on either side of your head as he stares down, those stupid piercing eyes staring down at you. "why?"

"shouldn't i be the one asking the questions here? like why the fuck you have me on this desk?"

he raises an eyebrow, leaning back and grabbing your thighs causing you to squeal in surprise. he spreads them, raising the dress you’re wearing until it's pooling at your stomach before you can even blink.

shit. what's wrong with him?

what's wrong with you? you should be kicking at him, you could easily shove him off. you could do it in a blink of an eye so why the hell aren't you.

where there's supposed to be fear...there's only anticipation. "you really are a slut." he laughs cruelly, pulling your panties down until they're completely off. where he throws them, you don't know. probably in some corner to hide so you forget about them, who knows what a pervert like him would do with it?

"you barely know me and yet...look at this." you shudder as his finger circles your clit before swiping across your cunt, bringing his hand up to show you your slick as if for emphasis.

"shut up." you grit through your teeth. "you're—" you don't have time to finish your insult before he's kneeling down, tongue immediately latching onto your clit.

your nails instantly scrape against the desk, shuddering as he begins to suckle on your clit. his tongue delves into you, fingers digging into your thighs on purpose as if the freak wants to hurt you. you can play that game too if he wants, fingers going to grab at the strands of his dark hair, pulling as you ground your hips against his annoyingly experienced tongue.

usually, your sexual partners don't willingly choose to eat you out but here is he. practically eager to get to business. he acted so high and mighty and still has the gall to continue doing so yet he's the one on his knees right now. freaking nerds are so easy. even overly judgmental ones with sharp gazes.

he’s basically lapping at you, moving from sucking your clit to eagerly drinking up your juices. never coming up for air as if he was made to simply do this. "f—fuck." you didn't want to make any noises, any implications that what he's doing is actually making you feel good but dammit it's hard when a tongue is diving deep into your most sensitive parts.

a particular bite has you instantly bringing your legs together but he quickly grabs them, forcing them apart to shove his face in between your thighs again. your breath catches in your throat as he licks up your dripping pussy. he doesn’t relent even once and the moans won’t stop escaping your lips, “sl—slow down. gonna…dammit.”

his tongue licks…freaking everywhere. the obscene noises causing you to hang your head back, he’s licking and sucking everything up as if it’s his favorite meal.

and it’s embarrassing. how fast you come. but how can not you? you mercilessly pull at his hair and shamelessly moan when you do. somehow you're the sweating and panting one as he stands up. "so that's what all the hype is about?" he tsk, seemingly bored.

it takes a few seconds for you to find the breath to say “don't act like you didn't enjoy that, with the way you were eagerly—”

"shut up." he takes his glasses off, putting them to the side before grabbing your thighs and pulling you closer to him.

"you're disgusting, you know? the nerve you have—"

"i spent the last two hours teaching you simple biology and somehow you couldn't do one question by yourself, if i'm testy that's all on you.

"it's not my fault." it comes out as a whine and you hate it, you were supposed to be insulting him. at least have some pride when you're about to be fucked by the guy who looks at you like you're nothing but a dirty piece of gum.

"shut up, for crying out loud. shut up." his voice is raspy as he unbuckles the belt to his revolting khakis.

you can't help as your eyes widen once his cock is in view. for such a nerd, he's actually packing. one hand holds your hips as the other guides his dick towards your leaking area and slight panic starts to take over. "a-aren't you gonna prep?" as orgasmic as that oral job was, you doubt just that will be enough to prepare you for that.

he grins, probably the first smile you've ever seen on his annoyingly handsome face. "don't worry, i'm sure a slut like you has a loose enough cunt."

"you little shit! that's—" your words get caught in your throat, back arching as he moves his hips forward, piercing inside of you. "fuck."

a broken sound leaves your lips as he continues to push his length in. it doesn't hurt like you expected it to but there's still a strong ache that you know will leave you limping tomorrow morning. it burns, burns so good you have to squeeze your eyes shut. you need something to hold onto as he starts to move, anything to give you some sort of balance but the flat surface underneath you offers no help. "ngh...eren..." you're not sure what you want to say but he doesn't give you time to think of something before he sets a rhythm.

it's surprisingly slow at first, like he wants you to feel every vein on his cock and you do. your walls desperately clench around him as you bite on your bottom lip, the room suddenly feeling too hot as his fingers grab your chin, forcing you to look at him. into that stupid gaze he won't stop staring at you with. his mouth is slightly open but no sound comes out. he's perfectly collected and you hate it. people like him should be cumming the second you touch them but he's...it's annoying.

his pace starts to speed up—he doesn't even give it another second before he's ramming inside of you. holding your hips with both hands as he sets a brutal pace that has you moving up and down the desk. "p-pretty decent for a nerd—ah!"

still, he stays silent. ugh, what's wrong with him? you bring your arm up to your mouth, muffling the moans spilling out of your lips in spite but his hands are immediately pulling them off. he chuckles, coming close enough that his breath fans against your face and a lewd moan comes out of you as he hits an even deeper spot. "don't do that, we all know this is what you want. to be fucked hard and fast to the point you're nothing but a mindless whore whose only purpose is to scream in pleasure."

you don't respond, biting down hard on your lips. his thrusts became more aggressive as he scoffs, "fine." his hand finds its way to your throat, squeezing slightly.

you suck in a shuddering breath just as his hold tightens, bordering on dangerous but for some reason the lack of air only makes your pussy throb, clenching tight around him. why does it feel good? why does everything he's doing to you only make you want more? his thrusts have now gotten erratic, almost forcing your body off the desk but the hold on your hips and throat keep you right where you are. you want to let out the moan clawing out from inside your throat but his grip stays, merciless as he pounds into you.

you don't know how much of this you can take, everything feels too hot. it's too much. "fuck look at you, didn't think you could look even more dumb." he pants, staring down. he finally removes his hand from your throat and you cry out the second he does.

"eren, please i'm—fuck...too much, it's too much." you gasp even though a sick part of you knows you could do this all night.

but right now...with the way his voice is dripping with cockiness— you hate it, hate the way he looks at you and talks to you. it's infuriating and too much. a tsk comes out of his mouth, "who knew you had a limit?" he rolls his eyes and in the next second, he's spilling inside of you. spilling and spilling until some drip on the floor.

like he's been holding himself back all this time.

fuck. he could've at least let you release a second time. you didn't think the asshole would be finishing right after you said that. you're panting, eyes staring at the white ceiling as he pulls out. he zips up his stupid ugly looking khakis as he steps back. "can you get off my desk now?"

the nerve of him...ugh. you slowly sit up, dress sticking to your skin due to the sweat and you have to refrain from asking to use his shower before leaving.

he gets you your bag and you slowly take it, throat aching and dry. there'll definitely be bruises around your throat and hips tomorrow and you're sure he's secretly delighted at that fact. "uh...." you trail off.

this is usually the part where they ask for your number, pleading for a second night with that desperate look in their eyes but he doesn't even send you another glance as he gathers up the papers on the desk, putting them into a binder. "make sure to study before sleeping tonight...if your body can handle that." his lips slightly curve up at that last part but he's not bragging, no just mocking you.

"o...okay." you lick your dry lips, suddenly needing a mint. "uh...bye?" you stand up too fast, cursing at yourself for it but his arm is around your hips before you can fall.

you bite the inside of your cheek, the proximity too close even though he was just inside of you a minute ago. he sighs, "do you need a ride home?" he asks grudgingly.

and you should say no. you don't need to be in an enclosed space with this asswipe for another second. just say no and walk into class the next day, demanding for another tutor. and then you'll never have to talk to him ever again.

but instead a weak nod comes out.

[milkybonya]

i'm not the same boy you knew back then

Warnings: food mentions and some angst, party mentions

Pairing: Yedam x (gn)reader

Summary: where Yedam broke your heart in high school because he didn't know how to act but now he's desperately in love with you and wishes you still felt the same :")

word count: 5.8k

inspired by Walls by All Time Low (it has explicit language! be careful~~i've put a link for it at the veryyy end of this fic)

[a/n]: I GOT SO CARRIED AWAY FOR THE FLASHBACK PART OF THIS OML I'M SORRY FOR THE CHAOS AND MESS BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOY

Hey there it's good to see you again, It never felt right calling this "just friends". I'm happy, if you're happy, with yourself.

"Isn't that Yedam?" your friend, sat beside you, asks. They point to somewhere behind your head, and naturally, you turn around to follow their finger with your eyes.

As the doors to the lecture hall swing shut, a familiar boy begins to walk quickly down the steps. While grinning, he decides on a spot near the back, far away from your almost front-row seat. You let out the breath you didn't realize you were holding and face the front.

"Since when did he go to our university?" your friend asks, also facing the front now.

"I have no clue," you admit.

You'd purposely accepted an offer at a faraway university to avoid having to see Yedam ever again after high school. High school had become one of the worst times of your life thanks to him.

-

Yedam's pov

As soon as I enter the hall, I find [y/n] with my eyes immediately. They look at me with a mix of shock, disgust and hatred, but seeing them fills me with so much joy that I can't help but smile.

Deciding not to bother them, I pick a spot near the back and sit down. I wonder to myself if switching to [y/n]'s school was the right choice...

-

[y/n]'s pov

It was obvious you were too much for me. Oblivious, I was young

Back in high school, you had the fattest crush on one of the school's most popular kids, and you hated yourself for it. It wasn't like you could control your feelings... but your heart was set on him. His smile made you feel so warm and you felt happy despite him not having the slightest clue who you were. You always watched him from afar, peering at him as he walked into the classroom while waving at all of his friends before taking a seat at the back.

By some chance, you got paired with him for an assignment. You thought he would be disappointed, since he had never spoken to you, but contrary to his somewhat intimidating aura as a result of him being a popular kid, he smiled warmly at you as you introduced yourself.

"I know you're [y/n]," he said quietly, looking down at the assignment instructions in front of him.

"How do you know?" you asked him.

He looked up and leaned in closer to you to whisper into your ear, only after being sure that no one was watching.

"It may not seem like it, but I do know my classmates."

When he moved back, he flashed you a grin before returning to the assignment instructions again. Your heartbeat was flooding your ears.

After meeting up several times to do the research and plan out the presentation together, you and Yedam somehow grew closer. You had always thought he was some sort of chic, cool guy, but he turned out to be super soft and sweet. The two of you laughed at each other's dumb jokes and procrastinated late into the night sometimes, only beginning your work when the café was about to close.

On one of those days, Yedam asked if you wanted to go to his place to finish the assignment.

"It's due in two weeks and we still have so much to do... plus we're so busy that we can only meet once a week," he explained, pouting slightly.

You agreed, feeling somewhat nervous and excited at the prospect of going to your crush's house for the first time.

His parents were home but asleep as it was late for them, so the two of you quietly went to his room.

In-between muffled giggles and late-night snacks, the two of you managed to get a lot of work done before you felt as though you'd hit your limit. After yawning and stretching, you told Yedam that it was time you went home.

"Do you live far from here?" he asked you.

You, in fact, did live quite far from his house, but you felt bad telling him this, so you lied and told him you lived close by.

He pouted and looked down.

"I was going to ask if you wanted to just sleep here... but I guess it makes sense for you to go home," he said, helping you pack up your things.

Yedam... wanted you to stay the night? How could you miss such an opportunity! Your crush! Wanted you to stay the night!!

Yedam noticed that you'd stopped moving, holding your pencil case in your hand as you thought about what to say.

"Is everything okay?" he asked you.

"Yeah... I actually... live kind of far," you mumbled, not wanting him to get mad at you for lying.

"You do? Then why did you say you live close by?" he asked, also taking his hands away from your backpack.

"I didn't want you to walk me home or anything," you explained. Yedam smiled at you, shaking his head.

"Don't worry about it now... do you have any clothes to change into?"

"Just my gym clothes... but they're dirty," you told him, shyly.

"Do you want to take something of mine to wear?" he asked you, already standing up to look through his closet without waiting for your answer.

You were going to say no, again, not wanting to bother him, but he had already pulled out some of his comfier clothes for you to wear.

After changing into them and walking back into his room, you avoided Yedam's eyes as he quietly lost his mind over how cute you looked.

"Um, so..." Yedam started, scratching the back of his neck.

"Would you be okay with sleeping in my bed? I'll go sleep in the livingroom-"

"No, no! I'll go sleep there-"

"No, I can't let a guest sleep on the couch!"

Both of you sighed, not being able to win against one another.

"Listen, it's either you sleep in my room and I go to the livingroom, or we both sleep in my bed," he said, pointing to his bed behind you.

You froze, trying to consider your options as your heartbeat grew louder.

"Well... I guess we're both sleeping here then," you said, in a tone that tried to sound confident but was a little shaky.

You plopped yourself face first into the bed to hide from your embarrassment, feeling the bed shift a few seconds later as Yedam joined you.

"Scooch over towards the wall. I'll sleep on this side so you won't fall off the bed at night," he said, pointing to the side of his bed that faced the rest of his room. You smiled at Yedam's kind gesture as you moved over.

He had turned off the light and it was dark now, and both of you lay side-by-side on your backs, staring up at the ceiling.

"Are you... asleep?" he asked you quietly a while later. You shook your head at first, but then realized he couldn't see you. So you said a quiet "no".

You felt Yedam shift as he turned to face you. You carefully turned your head towards him too, wondering what he was up to. It was hard to see in the dark, but he was just admiring your face. You looked away, feeling embarrassed, until you felt him shuffling closer to you.

It was a little nerve-wracking watching his figure tower over you in the dark. Blinking up at him, you parted your lips to ask him what he was doing, but he spoke first.

"Am I allowed to... kiss you?" he asked, quietly looking down at you.

Yedam... wants to ???? Your crush wanted-

You found yourself nodding before your thoughts could entirely be processed, and watched as Yedam lowered himself onto you with a small smile. His heart soared as he watched your reaction -- your eyes were squeezed shut so tightly out of nervousness.

Before his soft lips met yours, he found your hand under the blankets and held it in an attempt to ease you of your nervousness. He didn't know that it only made your stomach feel the effects even more intensely.

Your lips touched for only a moment, but it felt like a whole eternity. When he pulled away, he moved off of you quickly and shuffled over to his side of the bed again.

"I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry," he mumbled, looking away from you. You were confused.

"What's wrong?" you asked him.

"I... I was supposed to tell you I like you first but then now you're right beside me--wait not that I like you... wait I mean I do, but I didn't want to tell you like this--"

Hearing his unsure confession was all the confidence you needed to pull him closer, accidentally tightening his hoodie strings as you pulled him in to carefully press your lips against his again. He completely melted into your hands, then, wrapping an arm around your back and holding you close.

That was probably one of the last good memories you have of him.

After that, Yedam turned into a different person the next morning, avoiding your eyes and missing any trace of a smile on his face as he pushed a plate of breakfast towards you.

"Let's not walk to school together, okay? I'll be leaving first," he told you, leaving you alone in his own house.

You had no clue what was going on and no appetite to eat. After waiting a few minutes, you walked to school after him. You had no idea how to even get to school from his house, so after getting lost and arriving late, you finally managed to make it.

When you tried to approach him in class, he would turn his back on you and ignore you. It made you feel so small that you stopped even trying.

It was really hard for you to show up to school after that, because of how terrible you felt, but you still tried your best. Your friends knew something was wrong and they did their best to help you, but it didn't stop you from thinking about Yedam and why he was acting so strangely.

Until he texted you one day in the middle of class, asking you to meet him in an empty classroom.

You told yourself you shouldn't pay him any attention, especially after he ghosted you like that, but you still followed after him, curious to see what excuse he would give you.

In the classroom, you couldn't see anyone, so you thought Yedam hadn't arrived yet until you heard him call out your name from behind a file cabinet. By the windows.

"Come here, [y/n]," he said, motioning for you to approach him. He was smiling at you again, just like he did on those days when you'd study with him in the café. You told yourself to just turn around and leave, but your feet guided you to him.

You frowned up at him.

"What the heck have you been doing?" you asked him, tears already threatening to leave your eyes.

"[y/n], I-I'm sorry... you know how it is for me, with my popular reputation. Some kids saw us at the café and posted pictures of us, saying that I was going around dating a loser-"

He was holding onto your hands while wearing a pitiful expression, but you coldly pushed him away after hearing him out.

"So you've been acting weird because I'm tainting your reputation? Yedam, we never even dated! You gave me some... half-assed confession and... kissed me in the middle of the night and then ghosted me," you told him, sternly.

"I know, I'm sorry... It's so pathetic but I really do like you... I'm just really bad at this, I know, but I'm telling you now I like you-"

"In an empty classroom. Behind a file cabinet."

"Please, [y/n]. Date me for real... I promise I won't let you down."

You and your kind, innocent heart believed his promise. You believed him because his eyes were sparkling and he was holding onto you so tightly.

Yedam told you that you had to date him in secret, and that was just one of many red flags. He explained that if his friends found out, he would be teased and you would be hurt by their words, too. Nonetheless, you agreed. At school, you never spoke to him. All you got were stolen glances, Yedam winking at you every time you turned around in your seat. Somehow, that was enough to make your heart flutter.

You could only see each other in each other's homes, since even the risk of being caught out on a date was too much for Yedam to handle. The two of you would intertwine hands while watching a movie. You'd rest your head on Yedam's shoulder, or sometimes he would rest his head in your lap and you would gently stroke his hair, watching as his eyes squeezed shut tightly while he indulged in the feeling of your love.

Sometimes the two of you would listen to music together, quietly sharing earphones while staring out the window.

Sometimes you would just talk for hours into the night.

Yedam's smile would never leave his face when he was with you.

Except for when he was at school.

And you could handle it. At least you thought you could, until the final straw.

For Yedam's birthday, a few of his friends had gathered in his home, celebrating. You were also invited, of course, after you begged Yedam to let you come. He had told his friends that he invited you as a gesture of thanks for working on the assignment with him... it broke your heart to hear this lie, but you shrugged it off, again.

Everyone was feeling excited as they all started a game of spin-the-bottle. You felt incredibly out of place and already angry, even more so upon seeing a girl getting all handsy with Yedam, stroking his thigh with her hand and playing with his hair. She was constantly glued to him, but you shrugged it off, again.

After the bottle's mouth faced Yedam, the girl beside him dared him to kiss someone. How childish, you thought to yourself. You watched as Yedam locked eyes with you and started to stand up, making his way towards you with a small smile, but the girl beside him stopped him.

"Where are you going, damie? Isn't it me who you should kiss?"

Yedam looked back at her and then at you.

"I-"

"C'mon, it's your birthday!" she said, dragging him back down.

That literally is not an excuse and makes no sense, you scoffed to yourself, rolling your eyes.

The next few moments were a blur, but Yedam ended up kissing her and you felt like a piece of paper being torn in two. We can't even look at each other in public, you thought to yourself. You fought back tears and got up to leave. No one seemed to mind or care about where you were going, since none of these people were your friends anyway. Even Yedam was preoccupied, his lips on the mouth of this other girl.

You couldn't just shrug things off anymore. This was it. Now, it was your turn to ghost Yedam.

You hadn't told him, but your family were planning to move to another city soon. You told them to plan the move for earlier so you could leave that dreaded place and leave Yedam. Ignoring all his calls and texts, you transferred out the next week, and that was that.

-

I'm gonna break down these walls, I built around myself. I wanna fall so in love, with you, and no one else, Could ever mean half as much, to me as you do now. Together we'll move on, just don't turn around, Let the walls break down.

You can't focus in lecture as everything that happened with Yedam flashes before your eyes. Just as you're starting to live a normal life without him, he has to show up and allow of the trauma to resurface.

As soon as your class ends, you quickly pack your bags. Your friend does the same, understanding exactly what is going on. But it seems like Yedam and his feet move a little faster.

Just as you're about to leave your row, you look up to find Yedam standing at the end of it, a small smile on his face.

You sigh and turn around, telling your friend to do the same so you can leave through the other side. But Yedam just follows behind you quietly. He doesn't say a word and just follows you as you and your friend as you leave the lecture hall to go to your next class.

Suddenly, you stop. Your friend and Yedam stop, too.

You turn around, your fist clenched into a tight ball.

"Yedam, can you please stop following me? Do you not have classes of your own or things to do? Please leave me alone," you told him, turning your back on him again and walking forward.

Your friend didn't follow you, though, but looked back and forth between you and Yedam. So lost in your thoughts, you walk to class on your own, not noticing that your friend isn't following you.

-

Yedam's pov

After they say those words and leave, I feel my heart breaking in two. Of course I know how much I've hurt [y/n], but their words make me realize that I'll never be able to completely understand. I almost start crying right there and then...

"Yedam, right?" their friend asks me. I look at them and nod, confused.

"Listen, [y/n] hates your guts. They're not going to talk to you and hear you out, so I'll do it instead. I know [y/n] might regret it if they don't hear you out, even if they don't want to."

I smile at [y/n]'s friend. That sounds exactly like [y/n]...

"You've probably heard a lot of awful things about me, and it's all true. But... [y/n] probably didn't tell you about those nights we spent in each other's rooms... the times that we did get to spend with each other alone.... sorry, what I'm trying to say is that I've always loved [y/n]. Not even 'like', but I've always loved them. And I don't think I'll be able to stop... I know I was such a terrible boyfriend back then. I don't think I can say I even was much of a boyfriend... but I've changed. I can promise that I've changed. I know it must be so arrogant of me to ask if they'll give me another chance but..."

I trail off, my brain shutting down as I struggle to find anymore words to express myself. [y/n]'s friend nods after I trail off.

"I see... well, I've heard about your promises. I heard they couldn't be trusted but if you've changed, then maybe that has changed, too. [y/n] has a really kind heart, but I won't let them date a jerk ever again. So unless we both know for sure that you're different now, we are not letting you date them."

With that, [y/n]'s friend walks away and leaves me there.

-

[y/n]'s pov

In class, you feel completely empty, unsure of how to feel. You only notice that your friend had not been beside you this entire time when they take a seat in the spot beside you, apologizing that they're late.

"Where were you?" you ask them, looking up as they sit down.

"I was talking to Yedam," your friend tells you, never one to lie.

Your face fills with disgust at the mention of his name.

"Why would you do that?" you whisper loudly, causing some heads in the lecture hall to turn your way. You mumble an apology before returning to your friend.

"I wanted to hear him out," they say, casually opening up their notes.

"What did he say?"

"So you are interested, huh?" they ask you, teasing.

"No, I'm not!"

"I know, calm down! He just said something along the lines of how he's always loved you and does now, too, and that he's changed--"

"That is the most garbage thing I've ever heard," you say, interrupting your friend with a scoff. They smile, shaking their head at you.

-

When you return to your dorm after all your classes, you find a small gift bag hanging on the door knob to your room. Curious, you pick it up and notice it has your name written on the side.

You could recognize that handwriting from a mile away.

As if it's the side of a hot pan, you drop it, watching its contents spill to the ground. A pack of your favourite snack falls out, along with a neatly handwritten note, a CD player and earphones.

I guess it wouldn't hurt to look, you tell yourself.

Picking everything up and walking into your room, you sit on your bed and read the note over.

[y/n]!! ah, it doesn't make sense for me to be cute or excited in this note, does it? >.< please forgive me.... i'm a little nervous... here is that snack that you've always loved... do you still love it now, too? and here is something that i wrote for you~it's on the CD. just press play and i'll let the song do the talking... i wrote this after you disappeared.

- yedam

This song better be god tier if he's coming to leave it at my door, you think to yourself.

As the song fills your ears, it seems to fill your empty heart too. You can tell it's full of Yedam's sincere feelings and thoughts... or he's just doing a good job of acting while singing. You can't seem to tell, but you still tear up a little.

You hear the door to your room swing open, as your friend, who also happens to be your roommate, barges in.

"What are you up to?" they ask, placing some things on their desk. They turn around immediately when they hear you sniffling.

"ARE YOU CRYING?" they shout, sitting beside you and wrapping their arms around you.

"This... song... Yedam..." you croak, just handing them the earphones.

When they listen to it, they also go quiet.

"It sounds really sincere..." your friend tells you, quietly.

"I'm not the only one who feels that way?" you ask your friend, looking at them.

"You know him better than I do, so you're probably right," they tell you, standing up.

"Why did this boy have to show up and make a mess of my life again," you groan, hiding your face in your hands.

"Well, I have just the solution! I know you're probably going to think about him and not get any work done anyway, so should we just go to a party?!" your friend tells you, jumping up and down.

"A party?" you wrinkle your nose in disgust.

"It'll help you stop thinking about him! Please, we never went to any parties last year!! Let's go, just this once!" they beg.

After thinking it over, you agree. What's the worst that could happen?

-

Wearing one of your favourite fits and feeling good, you walk alongside your friend, who already has a groove in their step as the two of you make your way to the house where the party is set to be held. It isn't that hard to find, since you're just following the bright lights and loud music in the distance. It's a wonder the people in that house aren't being arrested for causing such a ruckus...

Finally there, you step inside and try not to bump into any weird people. The music is so loud its deafening, and you shrivel up at the sound of it. Your friend wraps their arm around you, pulling you in close and guiding you to the snack/drink area so you can take what you need and go to a quieter place.

Your friend did beg you to come today, so they won't force you to dance or do any things you don't want to do...

Now equipped with everything you need, you make your way to the basement, where it's a lot quieter despite being so busy.

"How's this for a change?" your friend asks you, grooving along to the distant sound of the music from upstairs.

"It seems like you want to dance," you tell your friend.

They shake their head.

"I'll stay with you toniiiiiight!" they cheer, hugging you tightly. You laugh.

"It's fine, just go up! The crowd doesn't seem too scary or weird down here," you tell them as you watch two people play mario kart in front of a TV.

After asking you 1000 times if it's really okay, they leave you there with a drink in your hand. You continue watching the two people playing mario kart, secretly rooting for the boy in orange because his fit looks really nice, even if you're only looking from the back.

He ends up losing and you let out a "noooo!" loud enough for the two to hear. When they turn around, you discover that the boy in orange had been Yedam all along!

I take back rooting for him... he deserved to lose!

Widening your eyes at the sight of him, you quickly turn away and try to navigate your way towards another room. To your surprise, as soon as you walk in, Yedam is in there, holding the door open at the other end and panting.

"[y/n]," he calls out softly, smiling slightly. You can tell he's testing the waters and wondering how to react.

You try to walk out of the room, but the door behind you has been shut by some drunken idiot! He's pressed up against the frame and no matter how much you push, the door just won't open.

"[y/n], if you want to leave, it's okay. I don't want to bother you," Yedam tells you, stepping aside from the other door and motioning for you to walk through.

You sigh.

"No, it's fine. I guess we're here for a reason now, or something," you mumble, sliding down the wall until you're in a comfortable sitting position.

Yedam smiles, closing the door behind him.

"Still caught up in all that destiny stuff?" he asks you, joining you in sitting on the ground but also keeping his distance.

You scoff in response. How does this kid remember everything about me?

"So... what are you doing in my house?' he asks you.

"Your.... house?"

"Yeah, this is my house. You didn't know?" he asks you, looking bewildered.

You think about your friend. They must have brought you here while knowing it was Yedam's house...

"Um... nevermind that. How... have you been?" Yedam asks you, wringing his hands.

"Me? I've been doing great until now. How about you?" you spit out your words sarcastically, but Yedam doesn't seem to mind.

"I've been... well... I'm not sure. It would be cheesy for me to say I've been feeling lost without you, but that's kind of how it is," he tells you, chuckling nervously.

"Yeah, super cheesy. It also doesn't make sense, Yedam," you tell him, avoiding his eyes.

"I know it doesn't, but to me it does. I know our relationship was a mess, but those times that we spent together were... something else. Probably some of the best times of my life, honestly," he tells you.

"And why... are you telling me this?" you ask him, curious to see how he'll respond.

"Because I know I'm in the wrong and there's no excuse for my past childishness, but... I've missed you. And I still do. I know I was really caught up in my reputation back then and I didn't open myself up to you properly, but I want to do that now."

He runs his fingers through his hair, and something inside you turns. You didn't realize just how much you loved it when Yedam did that until now... he looks so pretty--

No. What are you thinking?!

"I haven't missed you though, Yedam," you say.

He smiles sadly.

"I know. And there's no reason for you to. But I'm just... asking for a second chance in case you think there's anything left."

You gulp and look up at the ceiling. You hadn't even considered the possibility of dating Yedam again, but talking with him now is different. He's less cautious and seems to be a lot more comfortable with you.

Someone knocks on the door behind Yedam and Yedam tells them to come in.

"Oh, am I interrupting?" the boy asks, slowly backing away.

"It's fine, I'm just talking to [y/n]," Yedam says with a smile, gesturing towards you. You greet the boy and his eyes light up.

"[y/n]?! The one you always tell me about? Gosh... it's so nice to meet you!" the boy says, shaking your hand and sitting down in front of you.

"You put up with a lot of Yedam's antics, I've heard," he says, laughing. Yedam laughs along, but you're still in shock.

Yedam had never told anyone about you... but now this random boy knows everything?

"It was more than antics. I was... really bad to [y/n]. I'm surprised they haven't left yet," Yedam admits, leaning back.

"I transferred to your old high school after you transferred out, and this boy was always sad. He didn't talk to anyone but me, only because the teacher asked him to show me around. He told me everything about you and eventually told the rest of his friends, too. You were his biggest and only heartbreak... I swear everyone at our school knows about you," the boy explains.

"What did you tell them?" you ask Yedam.

"He told us how he had been dating you in secret because he was afraid to ruin his popularity, but that he regrets it a lot. A lot of his friends left him after finding out you dated Yedam," the boy explains. Yedam nods along.

You're in shock. The boy who was so secretive and insecure exposed himself as a heartbreaker?

"Anyways, I'm sorry to be interrupting. I'll leave now!" the boy says, standing up and closing the door behind him.

"You... told everyone?" you ask Yedam. He nods.

"I feel like it was the only thing I could do for you. You deserved to be known as the one who held my heart," he says, holding his chest and laughing at his own cheesy words.

You find yourself laughing along and loosening up.

A moment of silence stretches between the two of you, and Yedam breaks it by standing up.

"Do you wanna play mario kart with me? You seemed to be having fun watching," Yedam asks you quietly.

You nod, also standing up.

The two of you play for about an hour, screaming and yelling at the TV just like you used to in your bedroom when you'd play games together.

"I won!" you declare in glee, turning to Yedam to do your signature high five with him. His hands meet yours, and you only realize what you're doing only after its already happened. You awkwardly move your hands away, facing the screen again.

"I'm sorry..." you mumble.

"No, I'm sorry! It's really okay, [y/n]... if you feel uncomfortable around me, you don't have to--"

"Your song touched me a lot, Yedam. And now I feel like... I want to try again. Just like this game," you say, pointing to the screen that has try again written in the corner.

"Are you sure?" he asks you, slowly.

You nod, deciding you've made up your mind. You've seen a lot of green flags already -- enough to decide that it's okay to move forward.

Yedam smiles and looks down at his lap. Then his head lifts up quickly, his eyes lighting up.

"I can take you to that café you always wanted to go! They have one in this city... and there's a museum next to it too! Do you want to go there? I.."

As he continues talking, you realize that all of the things he's saying he wants to do were things that you never did with Yedam, even after one year of dating him. It was always stay-at-home dates and ignore-each-other-when-we're-at-school. Somehow, you feel excited, wondering what things will be like.

"[y/n]! I've been looking everywhere for--oh, Yedam? Hi!" your friend greets you both.

"Did you have fun dancing?" you ask them. They nod, pointing to Yedam with their eyes.

You get up and whisper into your friend's ear.

"We have a lot to talk about, but I think..."

Your friend doesn't even wait for you to finish before they say, "well, I have to leave early now. Yedam, can you walk [y/n] home? Great, thanks!"

With that, they disappear and you shake your head at your friend's strange behaviour.

Yedam is all smiley while still sitting on the ground.

"Do I get to walk you home now?" he asks you, standing up.

"I wonder what would've happened if you walked me home that day, too..." you mumble, thinking about the day you slept over at Yedam's in the same bed as him.

"What, do you want to sleep over today, too?" he asks you.

You shake your head.

"I don't want things to turn out like that again."

"You mean, you don't want me to kiss you like I did then?" Yedam teases you, sending you a wink.

"You--shut up!" you yell, chasing after him with a pillow.

This boy literally broke my heart, you think to yourself. He is testing his limits...

After you both calm down, Yedam walks you home. It's a little quiet at first, until Yedam speaks.

"Can... I hold your hand?" he asks you.

"This soon?" you say, still grabbing his hand anyway. He looks down at your hand in his and smiles.

"Yeah... you don't know how long I've been wanting to do this for," he admits, swinging your arm up and down as you walk.

You shake your head at him.

"Let's run!" Yedam declares, racing forward with your hand in his. You trail behind him, the sound of laughter escaping your lips and ringing in Yedam's ears. It leaves a bright blush on his face as he thinks to himself about how much he's missed your laughter.

The two of you slow down, panting.

"I'm so tired," Yedam wheezes, laughing at how weird he sounds.

"Do you want me to kiss it better?" you tease him. He raises his eyebrows at the comment. Maybe it's the adrenaline from all the running or the feeling of the night air, but a courage surges through you as you snake your hand around the back of his head and pull him towards you, pressing his warm lips to yours.

You pull away shortly after, feeling breathless again. A blush dusts Yedam's cheeks as he stares at you with wide eyes.

Your own stomach is full of butterflies, but you ignore it and walk forward.

"Are you not coming?" you yell to the boy behind you. He laughs and chases after you.

[a/n]: i just want to say that i do not condone getting back together with a toxic ex so soon... i was just really excited while writing and sped up the plot >.< but don't ever get back with someone who has hurt you unless you are 100% sure! please take care of yourself!!

[azaerlyn]

A chill ran down her spine as she exited the bar and she pulled her sweater tighter around her for warmth as she began walking down the street toward the bus stop. 

She knew better than to leave the bar alone, what with all of the recent disappearances that had been happening lately, but she was tired and wanted to go home. She wasn't a party girl, the bar wasn't her scene, but she went anyway because it was her cousin's birthday and would have felt guilty if she hadn't shown up for at least a couple of hours. The group had been too wasted to notice her slip out the door, having only had a couple of fruity cocktails. 

As she neared the end of the block an unwelcomed feeling overcame her. She braced herself against the corner of the brick building and closed her eyes tight, dizziness waving through her head as she felt her body become weak. 

They stood back, watching her. Waiting for the right moment. The drug the bartender had slipped into her last drink hadn't taken full effect yet but it was working. Yes, it was all going according to plan. One of them chuckled darkly, eyes darkening as he watched her uneasily round the corner into the alley to sit against the wall in an attempt to regain her senses. She was falling right into their trap. 

"Now!" hissed the second

This one was impatient. Always ready to jump on their prey and take her as his own without thinking of the consequences that would form if the abduction wasn't done just right. 

"Not yet." 

The older, larger, and more sensible of the group shushed his partner with a finger to his pointed lips. His eyes never left the poor girl who was fading quickly. 

"Help" came a quiet mewl 

"Now" the leader growled 

The second man scrambled out from the dumpster and hurried over to the inebriated girl, changing into character before he knelt beside her.

"Miss?" He asked, holding her head up and looking into her eyes

He felt his cock twitch along the lining of his pants as her green eyes flickered up at him weakly. They appeared desperate, lost, scared. He resisted the urge to lick his lips and continued the facade. 

"Help me" she whispered "I..I don't feel.."

"Shhhh, Darling, take it easy. Don't look so good, did you have one too many?" He chuckled softly "Do you have a cell phone? I'll call for help."

With little strength she pulled her phone out of her pocket, her energy giving way as it fell out of her hand onto the ground. He picked it up as her body slumped over into his chest, eyes closing as she faded into unconsciousness. 

He made quick work of making sure no traces of her or him would be found. He held the mobile device in his hand, chanted a quick spell, and watched as it burned to ash against his palm. Dropping the remaining soot to the ground he picked up her bag and lifted her easily onto his shoulder. 

"Let's go." The eldest took one last glance over his shoulder before opening the back door to a building and they entered, a flash of red light appearing behind them as they stepped through the portal with their victim. 

"Put her down, on the grate." 

"You know, Kenaji, one day I'm going to get sick of taking orders from you." 

"Is today that day, Dane?" The leader stood, broad chest taught and dark eyes narrowed, challenging the inferior one "You want to do this now, because I'm ready."

"No, man, come on we have a job to do." Dane muttered, looking away

"That's what I thought." Kenaji laughed, teeth shining with a cheeky smile at his victory

Dane rolled his eyes and placed the unconscious girl on the ground, laying her body across the metal grate and shackling her limbs to the metal bars. 

"Should we start now or wait for Benji?" Kenaji asked as he looked over the girl's body

"Start now." Dane shifted from one foot to another as he rubbed his hands together

"Figures. Go on, have your fun before she comes to." Kenaji rolled his eyes and sat down in the black leather chair

Dane knelt down between the girl's splayed legs and ran a hand up one of them.  As he went further the hem of her dress rose, exposing her thighs. 

"Look how smooth and pale she is." Dane commented as he slapped her thigh hard "Oh yeah, this one's going to mark up nice and red for us."

"Just don't damage this one. You know how He feels about damaged goods." 

"He can lick my ass." Dane muttered as he held out his hand above the girl

A silver knife appeared and he gripped it, running it down her body until he got to the exposed panties. He quickly sliced the cotton material off of her, paying no attention to the small starry print on them as he ripped them away from her crotch. 

"Fuck, look at that pussy. Looks so tight." Dane growled 

He ran his thumb through the folds of her vagina, brushing it against her clit. With his other hand he removed his cock, stroking it as he coaxed the nub out of it's hiding place. 

"Alright, baby doll, you ready?" He laughed, knowing that she couldn't consent

Dane positioned himself at her entrance and shoved his cock inside her dry hole. It didn't hurt him because demon cock was always slick from constantly being in heat. The girl's poor pussy, however, would be sore upon awakening but that would soon be the least of her worries once they really got started with her. 

Once Dane had unloaded his hot cum inside of her he pulled out, put his cock away, and walked over to the fridge standing in the corner. The contents of the fridge mostly held concoctions of  drugs used on the victims but even demons get thirsty after strenuous activity. 

"Toss me one, would you?" the third man asked as he stepped through the portal and into the room

"About time you got here." Dane tossed a beer to his comrade and smirked "How was work?" 

"Shut up." 

Benji, the youngest of the trio, hated being the worker bee. He was the one with the charisma, the "people skills", so naturally he would be the one to land the jobs that would discreetly allow him to scope out the next victim. Their Boss wanted specific types of girls lately so just grabbing them off the street without taking a few notes first was no longer an option. 

"Boys, don't fight. We got to get a move on with this one. He's going to want her quick especially with how disappointed he was with the last one" Kenaji glared at Dane

"What?" Dane shrugged in feigned innocence "Stupid cunt deserved it." 

Kenaji just glared at Dane as he stood from the chair. He made his way over to the girl and waved his hand over her. The rest of her clothes tore into shreds, leaving her completely exposed to their gaze. Her nipples hardened as the cold air hit them, causing all three men's cocks to stiffen as they thought of the possibilities. 

Their victim began to stir, chains rattling as she attempted to work her limbs. Small whimpers and helpless moans left her lips as her eyes fluttered open. 

"Showtime" 

Benji clapped his hands together as he knelt down at the girls side. Dane took his place at her head and Kenaji knelt between her spread legs. 

"Wha-" the girl muttered as clarity began to return "Wher-?"

Upon realizing that she was chained against a cold metal surface and that three large and intimidating men were surrounding her she began to struggle. 

"None of that now" Kenaji's deep voice spoke as he placed his hands on her shaking legs "Not gonna get out of these, so you might as well save your energy."

"You're going to need it" Benji laughed 

"Please!" She flailed more, attempting to cover her exposed body "Where am I? What do you want with me?" 

"Well, Sweetheart, you're in Hell." Benji smiled, sharp teeth shining against the flickering candle light "And it isn't us who wants you."

"Hell?! Am I dead? I don't understand, I'm a goo-"

"A good girl. Yes." Kenaji shook his head as he squeezed her thighs "They all say that, but it's never true. You're not dead. You see, we used a little black magick to transport you across the realm without harming your physical body. We need you perfectly intact to meet the Master."

"M-master? Lucifer?" 

"Enough. Gag her and let's get started." Kenaji ignored her question and began to run his hand over her pussy

"No, please!" She screamed and flailed at the touch, begging them to let her go "This isn't real, this can't be happening!"

"Oh it's real, whore. It's very real." Dane said as he produced a ball gag from thin air 

Upon seeing the gag she instantly tightened her mouth shut, shaking her head vigurously. 

"Open wide, bitch" Dane slapped her across the face but she did not relent. He sighed. "A little help here, Benny?'

"For the six billionth time, Fuck Face, it's Benji." 

The demon reached over and pinched his fingers around the girls nose, blocking all air flow while she continued to keep her mouth closed. 

"Fighting us is cute, but it'll only entertain us for so long." Kenaji said as he rubbed his finger in a circle around her clit 

Within seconds she gave up the fight and gasped for air, barely getting a full breath into her lungs as Dane pushed the gag between her teeth and secured it. Sharp intakes of air and snarles left her nose as she felt tears roll down her cheeks. 

"Oh quit crying, we haven't even got to the worst part yet." Dane slapped her again before kneeling back to his place beside her 

"Watch closely boys. I'm going to show you how to break a slut like this one in nice and quick." Kenaji smirked down at the girl as he pushed the long black hair away from his face "You are a slut, aren't you?"

She shook her head furiously, arms still pulling at the restraints. 

"Oh but you are." Benji chimed in, reaching out to grasp a nipple and squeeze it "I know all about you. You think me pouring you a drink at the bar was our first interaction? It wasn't."

As Benji spoke Dane handed Kenaji the tools needed to begin his process. A bottle of warming lube and a vibrating wand joined the space between her outstretched legs and the lead demon began to prepare her pussy. 

"I've been following you for weeks now, you just didn't know it. I've watched you go to work, volunteer at the animal shelter, grocery shop…" Benji paused to squeeze her breasts in his hands, kneading them hard as she squealed with fright "I've even watched you shower."

Her eyes widened at the thought and her mind raced  back to her recent showers. For a split second she almost forgot that Kenaji's fingers were finding their way inside of her used hole, still sticky with cum, and she winced as the tenderness of being raped with Danes' long and thick shaft shot through the muscles of her pussy. 

"You guys want to know what my favorite part about spying on this slut was though?" Benji laughed, flicking a nipple "Watching her cum to all that filthy, degrading porn she watches." 

Her cheeks reddened and her chest flushed with humiliation. She writhed her hips to try to attempt escape but that only made Kenaji's fingers slide deeper inside her. 

"I knew you were a slut" laughed Dane

She began to cry, muffled protests and please left the gag. They fell on deaf ears as Kenaji thrust his fingers in and out of her. 

"You've thought about this. Being taken, used, fucked like a piece of meat." Benji growled "Now you're going to get your wish." 

She screamed as she felt Kenaji's hand slide into her, fisting her sore pussy now. She trashed as much as her bonds let her and Benji held up a hand as Dane went to hold her down. 

"Let the little cunt fight it, let's see how long it takes her to figure out that the more she squirms the harder she fucks herself against Kenaji's fist."

She instantly stilled her efforts at the statement and was met with a series of "awws" from the three demons. 

"No, go on, keep fighting it." Kenaji urged "Turn yourself into a fuck puppet on my hand. No? Alright, we'll make you then."

Another scream attempted to fall through her gag as the vibrator was turned on and pressed against her budding clit. She thrashed as much as she could against the grate, screaming for it to stop. It didn't stop. In fact they kept going. Dane and Benji slapped and pulled at her tits, Dane choked her while Benji laid a series of punches across her chest and stomach, all while Kenaji continued to fist and vibrate her pussy. After several minutes of the treatment her body began to betray her. Her pussy pulsed around the hand inside it and her clit fluttered against the head of the toy. The pleasure of orgasm overtook her, distracting her from the pain, and soon she was shuddering. She panted as she came down, hoping that they would stop. It continued. For hours they beat her, tortured her tits, pulled at the hairs of her pussy, and made her cum over and over again until she thought she would pass out. Dane reached up and removed the gag and shoved three fingers into her mouth. He pushed to the very back of her throat, causing her to gag as she came again. As he removed his hand a stream of spit came with it and he wiped it across her face in disgust. 

"Filthy fucking animal" 

A slap across  her face didn't phase her. Her pussy was on fire and she knew she couldn't cum again. 

"No..more...please" she feebily shook her head, the fight long gone

"No, Baby Girl, you don't get to say when you've had enough." Kenaji punched his fist into her again, his knuckles brushing against her cervix. She wailed. "You're going to cum for me until I'VE had enough"

The growl that ended his sentence sent a shudder through her entire body and she shook, her limbs tensing hard and her body convulsing. 

"Three…" he began as he rubbed the vibrator over her clit harder 

"No, please!"

"Shut up, cunt!" Benji hissed 

"Two..come on, you can do it, give me one more."

Kenaji's tone was encouraging now. Coaxing her to be a good girl for him, to give him what he asked for. She couldn't wrap her head around the sudden softness in his demeanor but whatever he was doing was working. 

"That's my good little cum slut. You ready to give it to me, Baby Girl? Come on...CUM NOW!"

The scream that left her body as she exploded into orgasm echoed throughout the hallways of Hell's dungeon. Prisoners, slaves, and the Master's harem of playthings could all hear the gruelling, devastating sound of her soul being twisted as she lost control to the demons. They shuddered, thankful that it wasn't them this time, and winced as the reminder of knowing they would continue to be tortured resignated which each piercing shriek from behind the iron door. 

Her eyelids fluttered and she gasped for air, feeling darkness overcome her. 

"Good little slut" Kenaji chuckled as she collapsed against the metal grate, falling back into unconsciousness. 

As they rose from the floor to leave her there, dripping with her own juices that was dropping through the bars and down to the discarded sluts chained below, Benji made a slight twitch of his fingers over her and smirked. Her slumber wouldn't be peaceful with the images he'd placed in her head. He walked away as she began to whimper in her sleep. 

To Be Continued…

[exoczn]

VERTIGO || CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER ONE • CHAPTER TWO • CHAPTER THREE • CHAPTER FOUR

m.list

Pairing: Mark Lee x Reader x Yuta

Genre: Angst, Fluff

warnings: none for this chapter

Plot: what happens when you feel like a failure yet again like always and you’re not enough in a new city and accidentally meet a stranger who is broken himself but changes your life along with his own by a short encounter near the Vancouver river

————————————————

   You woke around afternoon because you slept at 3:30 am and spent the last night listening to soft alternative music, drinking cheap wine and looking at the sky; it wasn’t starry in particular but you always liked nights like this.

   You get up to make coffee for yourself and your phone buzzes. 

Yuta: Heyyy 

Yuta: The party thing is still on, right??

 You suddenly realise that it's Saturday and start panicking. You go to your closet and start finding something to wear but you’re too confused and you feel nothing looks that good according to you. So you call Yuta immediately.

he picks up after 3 rings 

 "hello?? y/n, what's up? don’t say you can’t make it and break my heart.” he chuckles.

 “Hey no! I won't do something like that yEt but well anyway that's not why I called you. I called you because I’m confused as to what should i wear and i wanted to ask you, uhhh 

what would you be wearing?”

 “well it's just a bunch of rich kids renting an airbnb and throwing a party, nothing fancy?  He sighs and continues  “I’m literally so excited to see you again idk why but can’t wait”

You try for it to not affect you that much and stop yourself from smiling that much and continue “Yes me too”

  “anyway y/n I’ll pick you up around 10:30?”

“sure”

——————————————————————

 You started getting ready around 9 after having some leftovers from last night. You were wondering about how things in your life were going pretty smoothly and how Yuta was everything you wanted in a guy. It really had been a week since met him and he texted you the night you met him in the coffee shop. 

  You both talked about music, anime, how you felt about the city, he talked about japan and his old neighborhood where he grew up and realized you both were going to the same university and Mark too. 

   You looked yourself in the mirror. You were wearing your 560 levi’s and a black cropped tank with your chelsea boots. You wore silver hoops and a small lock necklace. You were about to finish your look with a clear lipgloss when you heard your doorbell ring and figured who it might be. 

 You finished applying your gloss quickly and rushed to open the door and saw him standing there with a smug smile on his face and his pretty eyes. His eyes were almost too pretty. He was wearing a black shirt with a pair of light washed jeans as well.

 “Oh my goodness you’re looking almost as pretty as me” he said, widening his eyes with an open mouth smile showing his perfect teeth.

Why is he so pretty? What's happening to you y/n?

 You rolled your eyes while laughing and said “ha ha ha right” sarcastically. 

  “And look! We’re matching! No wait… you copied me”

 “We’re matching, yes. I copied you, it's not even possibly possible einstein.” 

 “But anyway y/n, you look- “

  “Amaaazing, i know.” you both laughed.

  “Now, shall we?” He held out his hand and you took it.

-----

  You enter the place and see a tall guy with brown hair walking up to the two of you with a huge smile and hugs Yuta.

  “y/n this is Johnny, johnny this is y/n.”

    “Dude wow! She pretty pretty- “

  “TOLD YA” Yuta says while shrugging 

  “Hi Johnny and thanks” you shake his hand and smile.

 “Hey John, where's Mark?” 

 “You know he hates parties, he's probably in the balcony or somewhere drinking his beer.”

 You weren't much fond of parties yourself but you came anyway as you already had no social life here and didn't know anyone else other than Sehun who lived in front of you and Kaitlyn your college friend.  

  You played a round of beer pong with Yuta, Johnny, Taeyong (his other ‘bro’) and some other people. At this point you were somewhat tipsy and wanted to have some water. So you went to the kitchen to get some water for yourself and for some reason the kitchen was somewhat dark but illuminated by the light coming from outside so you didn't bother to switch on the lights. 

You walk inside, you hear somebody “Y/n?” You jump

  “MARK???!!” 

 “Yes its me, calm down.”

 “MY HEART WAS GONNA COME OUT OF MY CHEST, YOU DUMBASS!” you almost screamed

 “I'm sorry I must've startled you” he chuckles.

 “No shit sherlock”  you roll your eyes and he starts laughing, it's almost like he's squeaking. It's cute. 

 After he stops, there's awkward silence between the two of you. You gulp down the water in your glass.

  “So how are things going between you and Yuta?” he finally asks. 

  “Good” you nod your head “great, I mean. He’s a nice guy and he's funny but very cocky. I think that's why I like him that much.”

 He chuckles again “I know he can get very cocky but it is indeed funny. He might look like an asshole to people or intimidation but he's a good guy.”

  “What’s up with your ex thing btw? Do you still miss her or-” you try to make conversation and also you were genuinely curious about how he is coping up with it because the first time you saw him, he looked pathetic.

  “Oh no no i don't anymore, i don't care about her anymore and i've realized that the whole dating shit is not for me i guess. Plus i like being alone now, it's comforting and i don't have to worry about ‘how to tell her that i hate being around her friends’ thing.” 

 “Right” 

 “Also did i tell you that you look good with that haircut.”

 “Thanks” you smile. “My brother thinks i look like a 7th grader.”

 “No wayyyy. It suits you” he gives a genuine smile”

 You thank him and then you remember “Oh Yuta, Johnny and your other friends were looking for you!”

  You leave the kitchen with Mark and you see Yuta, Taeyong and Johnny near the staircase.

You walk to them and Yuta says “Oh markkk where were you? I’ve been looking for you since I walked in.” 

  “I was uh-”

  “y/n where’d you find him and where were you ???” yuta asks you this time.

  “I went to get water in the kitchen and i saw him there.”

   Yuta got asked, “Oh.. are you fine??!!” 

  You noticed him completely ignoring the other three’s existence which made you feel special but guilty for some reason. 

You shook your thoughts away and replied

  “Uhm yes i don't know, i'm good, just a little exhausted.”

  “Should i take you home?”  

  “No, it's fine, I can take the train and go back on my own.” 

  “It's not safe at this hour, I'll drop you.”

   With that you both take off after saying goodbyes to johnny, mark and taeyong. 

 ---------------------

MARKS POV/

 After y/n and Yuta left,, Taeyong went to get smirnoff and 

 Johnny asked,”Hey Mark! Uhm why do you like y/n by any chance too?” 

  He caught me off guard by asking that and there were sirens ringing in my head and i didn’t know how to respond to it but i knew that lying wouldn't be a sensible option because he would easily catch me in seconds but i still tried to act as if i didn't know what he was talking about and said

 “W-what makes you think that?” I fake laughed.

 “Listen bro idk how others didn't notice but you know you were being quite obvious. Like when he rushed next to her to ask if she's okay, your face screamed that you were sooo jealous, i don't know what you plan on doing next but i really suggest you talk to her about it bro.”

 “man, i thought of it kinda and tried asking her about what's up with the whole situation and honestly, she seemed to really like him and well i don't wanna get into whatever they have for each other by confessing it to her and like i don't even know her so it's just plain weird for me to think of anything.” I tried to justify what I was doing to him and it felt more like trying to justify myself. 

  I went ahead and told johnny about how we actually met and how back then i was a coward and not smart enough to say anything but i realized i didn't really get a chance to say something to her and started wondering about what johnny said. 

Was it that obvious? What am i trying to do? Am I a bad friend? 

 ------------------------------------

  You reached your building around 1ish and Yuta tried to ask you out on another date but this time he said it'd be a proper just you-and-him-alone-date and you thought it'd be cool because so far things were going too well and you liked him too.  

 It was weird for you to process how vocal he was about his feelings for you and you realized that's probably the most attractive thing about him, he wasn't playing games with your feelings like you're used to otherwise and it was nice for a change. 

    You would have your mind wondering about mark once a while but you’d force yourself to tap back into reality.