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2ofswords · 5 years ago

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for your analysis meme: clara

This is going to be so much fun and so very tough, because Clara is such an amazingly complicated character! God, I love her so much but part of that is because she is very ambivalent and hard to describe. She is one of these characters where you can find an opposite trait for every other one she has (which is kind of the point of her). Also: I still haven’t played the Changeling route in Patho1 and I have a stronger understanding of the Patho2 universe… so bear with me. I will try my best to analyse our favorite saint.

their biggest strength

I needed to think a while about this one and the term that stuck with me was attentive cleverness. Because I really couldn’t decide if I wanted to call her attentive or clever and luckily these two can be combined into something, I find pretty precise for what I want to describe. Clara is very clever and has a lot of knowledge that not really anyone else in the patho-universe can gain (or at least the amount of it, people share bits and pieces). She is the healer most aware of the meta-narrative and at least in routes that aren’t hers is telling you either that she knows more than you do or straight out telling you something, you needed to know (and probably didn’t want to). As is obvious by her focus on hands and talking her main skill is also interaction with other people… but I think a lot of it comes from the fact, that Clara is a good listener. Which seems to be counter-intuitive because listening is assigned as Artemy’s domain in the artbook, but I think the other word used – rhythms – is pretty important here. Artemy’s skill is finding connections, intuit solutions as well as similarities and differences (there is a reason he realizes his similarities to Aglaya’s description of the inquisition) and gaining cultural knowledge that he then transforms into practical and usable abilities. Clara’s “listening” is more about singular people’s well-being and personal struggle. (She is like a good therapist. If your therapist wanted to convert you into a sacrificial religion. ^^) She interacts with her surroundings directly and attentively. I mean, she is very well informed very early on without really having a live before that or at least not in town (again, I did not play the changeling route yet and do not know her origins or how ambiguous they are kept at the end. Either way, she arrives in town at the beginning of the game and navigates her way pretty well.) However only calling her attentive sounds like the trait is a passive one which is not something I mean. Both her personas as a saint and a thief use her knowledge that is gained by being attentive in unconventional ways and/or for unconventional means. As noted in the beginning, Clara is very clever and that in combination with her noticing even small discrepancies and listening to people makes her able to peek behind the curtain of the game in the first place. It also helps to get yourself into places people normally wouldn’t want a teenage girl to be and Clara knows and is fully willing to use this ability. It is both the reason why she knows so much more about the greater scope of the disaster and also why she always seems to be able to get into any place she wants to. By the way, just as an afterthought: Of course that ability doesn’t come and is in fact enhanced by empathy. I do not think, Clara is listening to people only to use them and to gain information. You can genuinely be willing to listen to someone and still use the information you get out of these conversations. Listening carefully and actively engaging with other people is a great part of that strength!

their greatest weakness

Does “not being able to hold a knife when the town wants you dead” count as a weakness? Okay seriously, I have a really hard time to put what I consider her weakness into one expressive term. So I will talk about it first at length and then we will see. What caught my mind first was ironically Clara’s problems with communication. That might be the case because, yes, I still haven’t played her route, so I am working mostly on her ways of communication with the other healers. But Clara really has a lot of strong points that she has trouble getting across or acknowledged. Sometimes that is definitely not her fault and one of her problems is, that she is not taken seriously by other people. But trying to persuade someone to their cause and emphasizing the reason with an elaborate monologue how the other healers are demons. Daniil was genuinely asking, why you wrote your letter about your destiny, it’s fine! Same happens in Pathologic 2. Saying someone to stay put when they are in a pretty bad spot already is not a bad idea and Artemy is pretty open to both warnings and clairvoyance in general but saying. “Nope, do literally nothing even if you know you want to, I am a better doctor anyways” is… yeah hurting him in his professional pride isn’t exactly a smart move. Often it feels like she really has a chance to explain and the other healers would probably listen but then there is just a terrible miscommunication. (Which is a thing for all of the healers but Clara I-am-going-to-call-your-father-a-horrible-person-while-we-are-at-his-funeral Saburova… Look, it might be true but it is also hilarious.) But putting communication skills here would still be weird, since… you know… she is pretty good at communicating in different ways! And also all three healers are pretty prone to miscommunication albeit in different ways and for different reasons… So I think we have to dig a bit deeper still… So why is this happening and hindering her? There are multiple reasons to come to this conclusion. One I would call childlike stubbornness. (Which btw. Is also one of her strengths, but… it is Clara, everything is also its opposite. God I love her so much, she is just so hard to describe, it’s amazing!) Even with all of her wisdom and cleverness… Clara is still a child. As she should be, it makes her so much more interesting! But she also has this childlike quality of just… assuming people will completely understand and accept what she is trying to see and getting frustrated the moment it doesn’t happen. This is one of her contradictions. She is so very attentive, and she can touch other people with her hands as well as her words, but she also is inexperienced and doesn’t really know a lot about the world or about how to socially approach people which can be a big problem, if she desperately needs someone to listen. The other argument would be about her role in the plot and the way she regards her own role as well as the other healers. She is the most aware one and she does indeed know a solution to the dilemma of the story (if we do not conclude that this is a three way battle, but I exclude my thoughts about the factions themselves for this. She definitely though knows how to get rid of the town vs. polyhedron conflict) but this also puts her in direct opposition to both healers. Which… you know is completely fair and not a weakness. But, she is very uncompromising about this and while all of them are – at least when they are not the main protagonists – Clara is the most unmoving and also uncompromising of the three, telling everyone always very directly how she things the others are shit. Which again, is very justified but becomes a big problem when she needs help and makes it harder for her to express her own thoughts, even if they are very justified and might even help all parties. Speaking in riddles and of concepts beyond something we would see as our reality surely doesn’t help there either.

a headcanon about their childhood

Oh dear, tbh I am not even sure how metaphorical she just crawled out of the earth at the beginning of the game and if she even has a proper childhood… I think it is pretty literal but there are allusions in Patho2 that she actually has a past? At least she speaks about it and I guess it can be as made up as real. (A classic Clara move ^^) And having no defined past is kind of a big thing for her so… sorry, no childhood headcanon here.

a headcanon about their future (if they have one)

Again, I am not really sure if she stays in town or leaves with Block and I have read fanfiction with both, so I am not sure if there is a consensus in fandom either… If she stays in town I imagine her still being with the Saburovs but I do not know, if I really like this headcanon, since abandoning your newly found orphan in the middle of a plague is really something that should revoke parent rights… But on the other thing the position among the mistresses seems to still be pretty defined at least in the endings in Patho 2. I like to see her travelling with Block at least for a while. Maybe not at the front, that would be just… bad. But she also seems like the person who would just poke their head around at random intervals and nobody really knows, when she will get back and somehow Clara still knows exactly what is going on in town… Still she also seems pretty bound to the place and she has business there… it’s a tough call. She will definitely fire up the rivalry of the mistresses by a lot though. Probably even if she is just there for a second, she would definitely sow some mischief between Capella and Maria! Another triad of petty politics for her! Yay?

a small detail/scene that leaves a great impact

Oh dear, every scene she is in is just so impactful! (Also never knowing which Clara is with you right now (if there even is a difference) doesn’t make this easier...) I really like her quest in Artemy’s run, where she is upset about not knowing what exactly she is in the first place… but that is not really a small details or scene. Same goes for the cathedral and her offer to meet the inquisitor together with Dankovsky to stand up for that whole disaster. Which is still a really heroic but also not really a small scene and there is nothing to talk about there aside from “man, is Clara brave and set on doing the right thing!” I also think the letter about her ending is really interesting because it is just so out there and giving all of her bound a demonic nickname is just so over the top, but tbh all of the ending letters are very… passionate. So this might be more the games writing even if they lampshade it and talk to each other like the other one is the only healer in town who wrote a completely insane letter… But I digress. While I love Clara’s Patho1 design, I will say that I love her shaved hair in Patho2 and the commentary the artbook has for it. Seeing it as a sign of sickness or a deliberate mark of sainthood is just so on point for her! It is a really nice visual piece for her characterization and I also think putting the beany on top of it makes it even better. It is contradicting but firstly she deliberately kind of tries to hide her own contradictions (I mean, it is not part of her! It is just the sister, she is wrong!), which is also a nice added detail. Also, she might combine contradicting elements, but god, she is doing it with style!

their philosophy/worldview (or part of it) described in one neat little sentence

I am throwing the towel! How should this even work with Clara??? She has different philosophies and worldviews! Also, I think they differ a bit between the first and second game. The first one aligns a lot with the humble faction from what we hear but in the second game her dialogue alludes more vaguely to touching and changing people and not necessarily to “The right people must die for our world to continue” which is most of what I heard from her. Hm… How about: A saint’s duty is to touch the immoral and diseased, thus one can never rid themselves of all dirt. I am not that happy with this one, but… at least it has the whole touching other people thing in it and it is about good people not being pure, which also is a theme with her. It still sounds a bit judgemental and I don’t really like this emphasis of the “dirtied” but… I mean this is what Clara talks about in her letter, so I still think it fits, even if I would dare to say that she shows a lot more compassion than this sentence shows.

#pathologic #pathologic clara #the changeling #Clara Saburova #Which tags are we using for Clara???

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cultspaced · 5 years ago

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anon said : mason was royalty right ?? were they like their species equivalent of a prince ? im inch rested in the alien hierarchy . what was that like ? please give ur adoring fans the Lore . unless u don’t want 2 like it’s secret then that’s ok too I love u

oh anon, first of all, i still don’t have fans and secondly, thanks for being invested uwu

just a fair warning, since this is v important to my blog this is gonna get long and won’t go under a cut and i’m sorry if it’s all a mess and not sorted but it’s late and i keep remembering shit that needs to go into this okay .

to get into the lore let’s explore mason’s ( maisaaint’s ) species for a short moment . mason is a so-called AORLUT, a semi-corporal non-gendered species known for hiding their weakest points on a different plane of existence . they are, in the easiest to explain sense, all eldritch horrors with shifting ❛ bodies ❜ that change when necessary and can easily survive as a parasite . however, since everybody hides their weakest parts on a different plane of existence it means these multi-dimensional fuckers all see each other how they actually look all the time, while other creatures only see certain limbs . ( see here for a very vague description of what mason actually looks like and then know their offsprings look like very round squids and this is 100% a baby picture of mason okay )

aorluts are also known for having one of the most complex, impossible to learn and yet efficient languages . it is a mix of clicking, whistling, something that sounds like high pitched screeching and underwords ( which i have explained here but is basically up to three words spoken at the very same time . ) this language is absolute bullshit to anyone hearing it but makes communication extremely quick and leaves no room for wrong interpretations . ( something mason can’t keep up in english but since they already have to talk slowed down, they find joy in deliberately talking around the truth esp concerning their own heritage . )

lastly, about the species, not all of them are touch telepathic & empathic . mason in that regard is an absolute outliner since their ability is not just rare but also stronger than with most of those blessed / cursed with it . most aorluts with touch empathy are usually just able to skim surface emotions using parts of their bodies where the nerves are concentrated the most, whereas mason ( royalty ) doesn’t just rely on their most sensitive body parts but can literally feel what other aorluts would feel with every inch of their being . as a human that translated to their most sensitive bits of skin and not skin allowing them to jump right into someone’s mind . ( they could do a lot of damage in there if they really wanted ; see william for example even tho that was just a stress-related accident . )

next up : the home planet . it technically doesn’t have a name like earth is earth but instead has a category and every aorlut will just call it by that category ( or alternatively : home ) . MSR, pronounced every letter on its own and best said as underwords, is a hugely nebulous & mostly water-covered planet with flat buildings that stretch across the land and then go far & deep into the sea . since aorluts are multi-dimensional, breathing underwater or in any non-ideal environment is really not an issue and therefore their architecture is mostly focused on building structurally sound houses instead of checking that life can exist in these sometimes extreme circumstances . in a way, this is a defence mechanism towards strangers but also is just to some degree based on their long history of isolation and not having connected to other species even though they could have made contact a long time ago .

moving on : mason is in fact space royalty and was supposed to be the next in line for the throne . msr is governed by a monarchy with democratic influences . the royals cannot be voted and are either born into the bloodline or adopted if their abilities are seen to be amongst royal levels but their decision can be overthrown if the majority of the population is for or against something . that being said, the monarchy wasn’t just responsible for their ❛ country ❜ but had a hand in all the planets businesses and the parts of the quadrant they owned . in case anyone is wondering, no, they didn’t go around willy nilly fighting and claiming parts of space but in fact mostly just protected themselves when under fire, bought ❛ property ❜ off of poorer civilisations and on one memorable occasion, won a big chunk of their quadrant in a game of poker . ( it is somewhat unfair to play poker when your opponent can only see your tentacles but really that’s on them for even trying . )

so yes, in every sense of aorlut tradition, mason is royalty . they’re both born into the bloodline and would've been taken up anyways for their strong telepathic & empathic abilities since in aorlut culture knowledge about others is considered one of the most valuable things . ( spoilers here : mason isn’t too keen on invading other people’s mind’s but can’t imagine living without the constant buzzing of being able to feel someone else’s surface emotions in their head . )

anyways, yes mason is the space equivalent of a prince/ ss with a shit ton of power and was raised as such but found there to be no adjustment period at all upon landing on earth . after all, they had other things they needed to prioritise above being treated like a monarch and by the time that was sorted they had learned the word dude and knew about the comfort of old hoodies and they haven’t looked back at their royal comforts ever since .

since the lifespan of an aorlut is rather vague even for themselves, nobody ever really knows when exactly an aorlut will stop existing safe for starting to anticipate it around a certain age . ( as it’s customary for the eldest to just wake up one day and know it’s time if they want to go . ) however, since the species is multi-dimensional ageing is a weird thing and once an aorlut is no longer considered a child they’ll start to look like something weirdly between a young adult or a middle-aged dad until the day they die . death for an aorlut btw isn’t bad, it’s simply them pulling themselves fully onto a plane of existence ❛ living ❜ aorluts can’t follow ( according to the belief ) and it’s, therefore, more socially acceptable to just vanish than die amongst loved ones or on the battlefield .

anyways back to the drama : mason knew they were about to inherit the throne but couldn’t pinpoint when exactly it was supposed to happen and as the one directly in line for it, there was no doubt with anyone that maisaaint rl'flem would soon be the next monarch . yet, greed and envy are concepts older than humanity and can be found in many many other species, such as mason’s for example . this is btw where the google doc picks up, a coup was staged ( mostly against mason ) and injured, with a broken ship and their pets, they just about managed to escape . this proved for those against the monarchy that mason, although extremely powerful in their telepathy ( to unknown levels ), wasn’t fit to be a leader since they didn’t see this coming . in a way, however, mason knew this would happen which is the only reason they actually managed to get out alive .

hurt and betrayed, mason crash landed their broken ship on earth and just knew that their family had been eradicated . they were in pure agony physically and mentally when encountering william and trying to read his mind, which is then also the first time they realised the full extent of their powers and understood they could’ve defended themselves with but a few touches .

back home on msr, the news of the vanished heir spread extremely quickly and most people just assumed mason, like their family, had retreated to the other plane of existence, leaving the monarchy fallen and, surprisingly, allowing for the rise of a purely democratic new government .

#˹ * ⋆ ˎˊ ⟷ & meta ˼#long post #okay my brain is mush #turns out formatting was a vibe check in its own #my vibes are v exhausted rn

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casseythebee · 5 years ago

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Trail of Roses

Bingo Spot: Hide and Seek

Summary: You have just told Sam your pregnant a few days ago and now you are having some harmless fun and he brings a whole new twist to it

Pairing: Sam x reader

Words: 1.4k-ish

Warning: a little tiny bit of smut (but it is only groping and kisses nothing too descriptive), pregnancy, a few curse words here and there (I think max like three)

A/N: This is a fic for my Fluff bingo and it goes along with my Oceans of Roses somewhat series. And (Y/F/N) means “your full name” btw.

[Y/N’s POV]

It smells amazing. The smell of your great grandmother's meatballs is wafting through the entire bunker. It smells like garlic and tomato sauce.

You creep out of your room and pad down the hallway, the cold from the tiles seeping through your fuzzy socks.

“Sam?” you ask rubbing your eyes.

“In the kitchen, love!”

When you walk through the door, he asks, “Did I wake you?”

Since you got pregnant you have been an equally large amount of tired and hungry. You sleep all day and when you are not sleeping you are eating, it’s bad. You shake your head at him before asking, “Are you making meatballs?”

Sam walks towards you, taking your face in his large calloused hands before he bends over and presses a light kiss over your lips. “They should be done in a few minutes.” He stoops a little lower and trails kisses along your jaw and down your neck, stopping right where the neckline of your nightie starts. He starts sucking a dark mark on the top of your breast and slips a hand under the nightie to play with your boobs. You tangle your hands in his hair and pull causing him to moan against your skin. He pulls one of your nipples and that makes breathless moans tumble out of your mouth.

The timer for the food goes off and it makes you jump apart.

“You go sit down and I’ll bring this out for you,” he says, his voice still a little breathless. His erection straining against his pants and his hair all mused.

You chuckle and walk out of the room swaying your hips just to tease him. You sit down at the table that is obviously sit up for you two. The lights in the room are dimmed and there are two vanilla-scented candles casting most of the light, on the record player is a slow 20s music player. The table is already set with the bunker’s nice china and something bubbly in a dark bottle is towards the middle of the table.

Taking the seat with your back towards the door you unroll the napkin and set it on your lap. He comes in and drops the food at the table.

“What is this? You realize that I can’t have alcohol now, right?” you ask.

“Yeah, I know that I’m not an idiot. It’s sparkling water.”

You sigh and shake your head, “I read that I shouldn’t have carbonated things either.” When you see the disappointed look on his face you add, “It is okay I didn’t know either.”

You and Sam eat the rest of your meal with the conversation bouncing around from topic to topic, and honestly, you love it. The comfortable conversations you two have always put you at a sense of ease.

“Hide and seek!” you yell after swallowing your last bite if meatballs.

“Hm?”

“We should play hide and seek,” you repeat. “We need to be ready for this baby and get ready to play some kids game with the little one.” You rub your hands along your stomach lovingly.

“I would love to. But I get to hide first, please,” he begs.

“Fine,” you sigh and roll your eyes.

He walks you over to the library couches and sits you down. There he explains that instead of making you count forever he is going to put on a song for you and that when it is over then, and only then, may you go looking for him. After that, he instructs you to close your eyes and he presses play on the song.

“Is this the real life

Is this just fantasy”

“That sneaky little brat,” you say out loud to yourself.

For the next six minutes, you sit there belting out every lyric, no matter how squeaky your voice is.

“Got to leave you all behind to face the truth!” you sing along.

And you hum along to the guitar parts as well.

You do the best to get every single part of the song. “We will not let you go! (Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go!”

And as the song starts to end you are up out of your seat doing your dramatic solo, “Nothing really matters, anyone can see

Nothing really matters

Nothing really matters to me

Any way the wind blows.”

You sigh and finally open your eyes, looking around. The room is the same, lights still dimmed and food still on the table, but the only difference is that Sam is nowhere to be found.

“Sam!” you call walking down the hall towards the kitchen. “Where are you?”

You step into the kitchen and turn on the light. There is a note on the counter. In messy handwriting, that looks like it was written fast, it says…

“You are very cold.”

So he is giving me hints? This doesn’t seem fair on my part. You think to yourself.

Turning off the light you leave the room. This bunker is huge and there are about a million different places he could be hiding.

I guess that is why he is giving me hints.

You walk down the hallway and open each door and on one surface in every room, there is another note telling you that you are cold or far off and different variations.

“Sam, where the hell are you?” you call again, turning the corner. You stop dead in your tracks when you see a trail of rose petals and full roses all the way down the hall. It goes the length of the hallway and turns to the right at the end, at the foot of the trail there is a little piece of paper that read…

“You are getting much warmer.”

You start running down the hall almost slipping on the petals a few times, you turn a corner and see that the petals end halfway and turn into the living room. You run harder until you are in the room and stop abruptly.

Two armchairs have been pushed towards the ends of the couch and there is a pole in the middle, draped over everything is a white sheet- with a beautiful rose pattern- it all creates a pretty big fort. Inside the fort are a white fuzzy rug, a few throw pillows, and a big blanket that your grandmother sewed for you. There are fairy lights pinned to the sheet and hanging off of the lights are printed out pictures. When you squint hard enough you can see they are pictures of you and Sam, some you are posing for and some of them look like Dean or Jack snuck pictures of the two of you. In the middle of everything is Sam.

“Oh, Sam. It’s beautiful!” you exclaim.

He stands up and starts walking towards you and says, “You like it?”

“I absolutely love it!” You fall into him, resting your face against his chest and wrapping your arms around his neck. He gingerly wraps his arms around your waist.

“I’m glad you like it because there is something I want to ask you.” He pulls away and drops to one knee.

You gasp, slapping your hands against your mouth. You can already feel the tears flowing out of your eyes.

“We have known each other since we were little kids and I have been madly in love with you since we were teenagers. We have been dating and living with each other for almost six years now, and now we are even going to start a family together,” tears start welling in his eyes and now yours are free-falling down your face. “I can’t think of anyone better to give birth to my children and to share the rest of my life with. With that, (Y/F/N) will you marry me?”

“Oh my fucking god yes!” you practically scream. You grab onto the front of his v-neck and drag him up and towards you and kiss him fiercely.

When he pulls away he slips the ring on your finger and you finally get a good look at it. It is rose gold with black diamonds along the band and inside of the sunflower made of the rose gold metal, on the side is a skull made of the same metal. “Oh my god, this is gorgeous!”

“Yeah I got it custom made just for you,” he admits. “Would you like to enjoy our fort?”

“Hell. Yes.”

You two spend the rest of the night watching Disney + on your Chromebook. You both get a little handsy with each other in the middle of Beauty and the Beast and use your mouths for things other than eating popcorn.

#Sam Winchester #sam winchester x reader #sam winchester fluff #fluff #supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fic #supernatural fluff #fluff bingo #hide and seek #dean winchester #Jack Kline

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fyrapartnersearch · 6 years ago

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A sly return

Hello, it’s been a while…   And I am back with a new request! This one will be more specific as it only targets certain fandoms. I have had plenty of amazing original roleplays in the past time but now my desire is slowly favouring canon universes once again. Btw, call me Gil ;)   I have a strong penchant for including original characters and ideas that can be added to the pre-existing plot. Also very happy to expand on the given worlds and open to AU’s. Okay so I am a really big nerd when it comes to the supernatural, mysterious, urban myth and fantasy. Love combining those given elements with organised crime, complex characters, cataclysmic events and dark schemes that all unravels as time goes on.    A little about me. You must be at least 18+ of age if you want to start a roleplay with this gal here. Since I am in my twenties, I prefer maturer partners. I accept anyone, regardless male or female. What I expect is a decent (if not very good) grasp on grammar, the ability and will to write creatively, shoulder a great part of the plotting and responsibility as well as passion for roleplaying. Of course this should be seen as a fun hobby but I really like to invest… I wish for my partner / friend to take equal initiative.   Here are my cravings and guidelines! Even though they are limited, I made sure to filter out the ones I know I wouldn’t role-play anytime soon. So if you are interested in something I didn't mention here, I am afraid I might not role-play this or decline.    Fandoms and cravings:

Castlevania ****

Devil May Cry ****

Game of Thrones ***

Witcher *** 

Fate **

 Star Wars ***

 What it entails:  Alright, so you are writing with some of a mature age. I have 11 years of writing experience when it comes to the game. This will be a fair warning that this request is not for the faint of heart. There will be violence, swearing, gore, intimate themes, uncomfortable subjects, drama, conflict and other dark matters included within the story. I have few limits but I will respect the boundaries of my partner, so do not shy away from telling me. Just so you know, I won’t fade to black or skip out on the nitty gritty. Go big or go home. Interests: My line of interests are very electric when it comes to genres. I love conceiving my own lore inside a stories, be it an original or a pre-existing story. Gothic fantasy among others are one of my favorites. I am not opposed to tapping into science fiction, action, romance, crime, action or thriller genres, in fact I encourage it. Inspirations for me are Lovecraft, Hellsing, Blade, Underworld, etc. As for the fandom inspired RPs, I am more than willing to bend some rules and be a little indulgent. Writing: 3rd person perspective. My writing is wide-ranging and flexible, which means that frequently, word count will go up 1000+ per reply - though it highly depends on the given situation and partner. Quality over quantity as they say - but why not both? I love detail in description, and I am actively seeking someone of the same infamy. My partner should have a basic grasp on grammar, punctuation and somewhat of an interest in knowledgeable writing. I also double! (preferably, but we can always discuss whether it makes sense for our roleplay our not.) World building and sharing the burden: You should be active and help me shape the world around our characters. Even if we discuss many things during and before the roleplay, how we wish for things to play out and take its course, I am always happy to be surprised with a secret of my partner’s character I didn’t know before. You don’t need to lay out all your cards on the table… keep it a little mysterious and suspenseful. Just enough so we can work with the ideas, but not completely kill off the suspense. Characters: I write canon as well as OC characters. Faceclaims, GIFs, drawings, mood boards or just a plain physical description is absolutely sufficient. Whatever floats your boat when it comes to visualising your character and their backstory, I’m on board. Characters should be written as opulent, flawed, unique, talented, heroic, villainous, spiteful, angry, and everything in-between figures. In other words, don’t be scared of making them ‘human’, even when they are non-human. Romance: Openly play and accept characters of both genders, preferable m x f pairings, but I am open to m x m and f x f relationships as well. I have more experience with m x f relationships, so I might be more savvy with this one. If the chemistry of two characters compel me, I will ship them no matter what! When it comes to sexual scenarios and intimacy (intercourse, foreplay, all that jazz). I encourage erotism, but in a tasteful manner (that goes for romance as well). The passion must be felt through the screen, even if it’s just a mere description of someone’s deep train of thought. Content: Drama, violence, sex, metamorphosis, symbolism, action, romance, pretty much everything is a-okay. I am unbothered by certain subjects that may or may not be uncomfortable for the general public. Roleplays are fictional stories and we best keep viewing them as such. If there are things you are uncomfortable with, name them and I shall respect those boundaries. But don’t be surprised when suddenly one of our characters bites the dust, or gets tortured. It may be difficult to write and read, but it is all part of the story and furthering the plot. My roleplays imply and involve brutality, mayhem, psychological and physical torture as well as other things. But I also endorse beauty, serenity and placid moments, scenes or characters. I love it when it comes full circle… everyone- and everything has their beautiful and hideous side. Both should be embraced. Communication and friendship: OOC-chat friendly! I love meeting new people and making potential friends. Plus it strengthens the compatibility between us. Communication is the alpha and the omega. If there is something that bothers you, or if you think you are left out in some way (be it a mistake on my part or we’re both at fault here), don’t be scared of telling me. Really, it won’t be taken personally - since I know that we slip up every now and then, we’re only human after all. It is also completely sufficient if you only type out a few messages per week. I am super chill about it. It doesn’t bother me re-writing a scene to fit the narrative more. If there are mistakes, they can be corrected - just to get that out there. We can always exchange opinions and see what would benefit the story most. I will also voice my opinion should something arise that could be bothersome. World building and plotting: An active roleplayer is wanted without a doubt. Can’t do the thinking for two now. Let’s row this boat together. Limits: Subject matters I won’t touch are pedophilia, bestiality, necrophilia, vore, scat, furries and some other bizarre fetishes. Also no one-liners or text-talk messages. The sentences have to be cohesive, coherent and decently structured.    Now a little more information about myself. I live in CET central Europe. My response rate varies throughout the weeks, depending on my schedule.  I study at a university full time and work a job on the side and both are keeping me fairly busy. My writing will increase most likely during the weekends. If I should hit a hiatus, I will inform you as soon as possible. I understand when you are busy as well and are not able to respond, though I prefer if my partner does not ghost me. At least let me know what’s going on so I can adjust and put the roleplay on hold if needed!  Mediums I roleplay on are email and googledocs. Though I also have Discord in case for OOC chat! Preferably my partner would message me first on email, giving me a brief description of themselves, their cravings as well as ideas. That way I can see if we’re compatible or if this bears any potential. After that we can easily move to Discord and carry out our chats / conversation there.   Message me here EMAIL: [email protected] Hope to hear from you soon! Lots of love!     Sincerely yours, -Gil

#indie rp #indie roleplay #independent roleplay #oc rp #multiple paragraph #para #long term #email #tumblr #spn rp #aou rp #submission

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sometimesrosy · 7 years ago

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Alright I need to ask cause I'm in the positive boat. If you had to bet which episode clarke and bellamy FINALLY share their first kiss in this season what would it be? lol

I think mid season will be the time when we’ll see a physical manifestation of their feelings for each other. This could be anything from a continuation of our hand holding metaphor (laced fingers?) to some version of a hug/non lip to lip kiss, to getting stuck in an enclosed space all up in each other’s business and clear sexual tension, to any version of kiss on the lips, to full on sex. I DON’T KNOW. There’s an argument to be made for any of it. And depending on your definition of kiss, the chance of a kiss happening goes up higher or lower. Anywhere from 25%-75% by midseason. Talk to me after I see the first 4 eps for more definite guess. Which one is the one Antonio Negret is doing? I tell you, Antonio Negret directing makes sex more likely. He did a fantastic job with Olicity. And what is that? 8?

I think as season B goes on, whatever happened physically in midseason between them, will add to the emotional stakes and drama and angst of the action heavy season B. If there isn’t a kiss midseason, I see it as nearly definite by the finale. 99% The absolute LEAST amount of Bellarke I see happening is lots of sexual and romantic tension for the whole season ending in a full canon confession in the verrry end, with something like “I won’t lose you again.” linked hands. raising hands to lips and kissing them. “together.” But I think it just as likely that they have a full on sex scene mid season. So those are my two extremes of bellarke canon. Full on sex then angst then together commitment at the end. Romantic pining, sexual longing, and angst for the whole season leading to a gentle confession and physical expression of love. Which way will they go? IDK. Most likely somewhere in the middle. Also I think they did the pining/gentle confession last season so I think they won’t do it again, which makes early sex then angst more likely.

Before listening to all this fandom drama, I was really positive about Bellarke happening in season 5. It’s remarkable how fears and anxieties can just rise up like a tide and sweep you away. But most of them don’t have a basis in reality, I think, and some of them actually take what I consider to be near confirmation that Bellarke is happening to mean that they are saying Bellarke will never happen and we are being baited. And I don’t really understand that kind of circular logic. But it’s shouted with such passion and carried up so widely by the fandom that is more focused on a kiss proving canon than on the story being carefully crafted, that it makes me hesitant to make my predictions. I even came across someone who implied my meta was bullshit and has been twitter ranting about how we’re being baited. It turns out that when someone challenges my meta, I don’t rant, I go deep and explain my evidence on my own time, so this is apparently what I’m going to do.

I think this is the season. Not for established Bellarke relationship, that’s next season, but for them finally addressing their feelings for each other as more than just platonic partners. They showed it last season, with plausible deniability not just for narrative sake (mutual pining) but also for fandom politics sake (too soon! be respectful.)

Wow. OKAY. So there’s my guess. If you want to know WHY I am predicting this, then you get to read after the jump. Because the thing is, I’m basing my prediction on narrative structure, romantic tropes, storytelling techniques, and ALSO what JR, Bob, Eliza, and reviewers have said about the new season. As well as the ep 1 spoilers (so don’t read on if you don’t want to know.) BTW. LONG because I have a lot.

Bear with me, I’m putting the new details together with my old speculation based on season 4 and development from all 4 seasons. This is to show you WHY I think what I do and that it’s not really about shipping for me, but about crafting a story.

I’m a writer, and when I write romance into a story, I need to make sure there is enough conflict and uncertainty to make it interesting. It is built into romantic plots. However, my romances happen within one book, not 5 seasons, and fair warning, because romance is not the point of my books, they are not the finale, climax or reward. They generally happen sometime in the middle and then we see an uncertainty, fear, angst and a narrative conflict that might separate the love, leading into the plot climax/conclusion. Because I write sci fi, not romance. The goal is a non romantic one, and the romance is about character development and motivation. So love is HOW they reach the goal, not the goal itself. Which, I think, is the way this show is treated. But, this is my interpretation, and you should know that going in, it comes from someone who is also writing science fiction this way. It’s a writer’s perspective. I am trying to figure out how JR is telling HIS story.

In SDCC JR declared that Bellarke was the central relationship and it has always, in some way, been about their relationship. Listen. This means he has ALWAYS been telling the story of Bellarke. I can confirm, as can the rest of the Bellarke meta community as we’ve been analyzing it the whole time. This is important. This means that not only are we looking at Bellarke in the current season, but looking at the WHOLE show and how it’s developed. Because he did it DELIBERATELY. HIs Bellarke story has taken all four, now five seasons. (huh. he admitted it. it was the plan. it’s not a bait. it’s not fanservice. it’s the STORY.)

So when I look at the WHOLE story, this is what it looks like to me.

Season1: Trust. Get her whatever she needs. I trust him.

Season 2: Devotion. He’d do anything for her, it just makes sense. Bellamy is the key.

Season 3: Commitment. Together (drink poison) I trust you. I believe you. Holding hands.

Season 4: Romantic Love: If I’m on that list you’re on that list. She centers you. You’ve got that backwards. She’ll see how special you are. Sacrifices humanity for him. I got you for that. 6 years of pining.

Season 5: ???? what could it be? we’ve had The 100 tell a love story by defining the elements of love, so what’s next? The next level I think is Physical Attraction.

In Conageddon, Bob and Eliza said that Bellarke had it rough. That they come back together immediately, trust is in their dna, that they are confused about who they are to each other, about their platonic relationship (if they are confused about the platonic nature of their relationship that means something isn’t platonic or it wouldn’t be confusing,) that it’s an intense relationship (upping the level of emotion,) that it’s turbulent, up and down, and first they love each other, then they hate each other, then they love each other then the verry end…we get something that is described variously as great, sweet, *silence with a smirk* and will make Bellarkers happy. All of that description sounds to me like a description of sexual tension, except for the ending which sounds to me like canon confession of love or commitment. Or showing them TOGETHER in the transcending romance kind of MARRIED way. Not dating. Committed. Soul mates. Beyond time and space kind of thing. (but possibly not physical at all.)

Some people take the B/E concerns to be proof that there is no Bellarke happening but I take it to mean that there is. Because I’m looking at character and relationship and narrative development over the seasons (as JR said that was the story.) And B/E was always a possibility to push the story from platonic to romantic by adding conflict, jealousy, a choice, and contrast. IT’S A NARRATIVE TOOL TO MAKE THE STORY HAPPEN. We get an article saying there is no love triangle and fandom takes that to mean there is no Bellarke. And the article itself was covered with photos of Bellarke. idk. that’s a funny takeaway. When to me, it was saying the B/E issue would be resolved early in the season.

The most relevant detail to timing of romantic development, however, is the issue of pacing. Which is a new revelation for us.

Episodes 1-4 happen within hours, apparently. The spoilers from the first episode must happen right before spacekru discovers The Eligius. Whatever happens in ep1 between BE will be brushed aside for the need to do something to GET BACK DOWN TO EARTH. And JR said that when Bellamy finds out that Clarke is alive EVERYTHING CHANGES. Now HOW exactly do you think it changes? What could the changes mean? Why is a way down to earth not more of a change for Bellamy/spacekru than finding out Clarke is alive? Because that’s pretty life changing, yeah? What’s the element that Clarke’s existence could change more than going home? Loyalties. Family. Love. ??? Their bond snaps back into place. Does it override other bonds? Which bonds are in question here in the first 2 eps? Who is unsure of her place in the family? I guess we’ll have to see, but do we or do we not have a question of B/E over B/C? Could it be POSSIBLE that one of the things that change when B finds out C is not dead is B/E? Hmmm? When B/C was what kept B/E from happening in the first place? Hmmm? Like. Is this not simple math? someone do the math. I know there’s an equation there. (why do I, miss mama don’t do math, keep putting math into my analysis?)

Anyway, back to the speed. If it’s really moving that fast, though, then there won’t be time for anyone to really PROCESS what Clarke being alive means. Bellamy won’t have time to understand it or make rational decisions about who comes first. Except we know he’s changed his MO, so maybe we’ll see him fighting his own head vs heart thing going on with no time to sort it out. INTERESTING. Clarke won’t have time to settle back in to the family or adjust to not being one of them. Echo won’t have time to make peace with Clarke’s possible usurpation of her place with the family. OR maybe it won’t be an issue at all. Clarke and Bellamy will just naturally slot back into place as partners, since there’s no time for thought… which would leave Echo feeling out of place. Well, we do know that Eliza and Bob did say trust was in their DNA, and they did say that Echo was struggling with her place in the family. So that seems likely.

What does this mean to romantic BELLARKE? It lowers the chance of them addressing their feelings head on. Because they have no time to process or talk. But it raises the chance of them DOING stuff without conscious thought, touching, non verbal communication. Hard to tell until we see them interact, but if you move things fast, and there’s no time to address things, and they are intense and confusing and there is “love and hate” then we’re going to see things boil over without being logical. The emotions that I see as repressed here are going to be their feelings for each other. Love and desire.

Sorry y’all. I know how many of you think it’s hopeless and have lost faith, but what I see is a really great CANON SUBPLOT of romance trying to break through the danger and action and adventure and survival and fast pace of The 100. It won’t be subjective. It won’t be all told in fades and music, it will be part of the story, and addressed directly. I can’t guess the details, but I can tell you the Bellarke story this season will be canon romance. (Please just remember that it is not a ROMANCE GENRE STORY so it will not be the majority of the plot, but buried within the scifi survival story.)

I’m apologizing for being pro canon bellarke. Can you believe this fandom? They ship a thing by ranting about how it’s not going to happen. I do believe they are not allowed on my ship at all. Go sink your own, you blorkes.

#the 100 meta #the 100 spoilers #the 100 s5 spoilers #spoilers #bellarke #believe in bellarke #bellarke development #bellarke speculation #romantic development

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venusparker · 7 years ago

Text

billet-doux↬ p.p

prompt: peter was never quite good at saying words, so he doubts he’s any better at writing them.

warnings: prepare for the fluff and cuteness overload. i’m in that kind of mood. also super long btw. (and i did not reread this that well so if there’s typos i’m sorry)

notes: hope you all like this because i’ve been thinking of writing a more peter centric, less reader type of fic. also i’ve been wanting to write a lovey dovey one. i’m thinking of writing some more ned leeds stuff as well so if you guys have any ideas, just send them in!

Billet-doux.

The words repeated in Peter Parker’s head like an echo, his focus varying between the miscellaneous thoughts in his head and the piece of crumpled notebook paper on his desk. The paper was free of lettering, but covered with ink stains and crinkles from the sweat he has mustered up the minute he got the idiotic idea in the first place. A billet-doux—what was he thinking writing you a love letter? Really, he wasn’t sure. The particles of dust in the sun floated down as he stared hopelessly and aimlessly in front of him, eyes almost pitiful. Peter had never been a good writer, nor did he think he could sum up how much he cared about you on only a single mere sheet of paper, a paper whose college-ruled lines were incapable of capturing all the love a boy his age could feel about someone as breathtaking and as quiescent as you. A fool he was, frankly, thinking that just because he had heard the words in class, or that because the one time he would decide to do something even slightly out of spontaneity, it would work out seemingly.

Then again, this is the constant cycle, the same speech he tells himself everyday–or at least nearly, practically, overwhelmingly everyday–before he once again strings together the words and expressions and phrases that could even come close to describing the levels of anxiety and longing you filled him with. In his head, it was romantic and everything you ever wanted, with no awkward pauses in between paragraphs with commas in places where commas didn't belong and crossed out adjectives that sounded more as though they were written by someone who was five, not fifteen. In reality, when he'd reread everything, he was a sappy writer. Sappier than he wanted to be; but he couldn't help it. He really wasn't all that good with saying the words he wanted, so he doubted he was any better at writing them. Eventually, the paper––another one of many––would become a filled up, scribbled upon letter, with his messy, scrawled handwriting curving his y's and making it possible to see a slur within his s's. And, just as eventually, he'd stash the letter away in the same place he stashed all the other ones, and it wasn't that shocking to know that they were in an old folder that he once used for AP US History when he had been more focused on school and less on superhero-ing.

It wouldn't be surprising to know that he doesn't keep the letter that far from his suit.

Today, the letter had been longer than the others. Most of them had started out the same way, reminiscing how adorable you looked, or how hilarious he finds your quick wit and clever comebacks towards Michelle whenever you two went at it in class. He would know, considering he was sitting next to you for all of it, everyday, ever since he started high school. But today, he truly went all out. One of his tawny eyes closed in concentration, mouth pursed, head tilting slightly while reading it all over, and wondering, wondering, wondering: why couldn't he just say this all to you out loud?

He thinks it's just because it's easier for him to script all these emotions down and never show them, or at least have the guarantee of his voice not being shaky or breaking, than to have the rejection from you. Aunt May had found them once, much to the red-faced and flustered Peter's dismay, when she was cleaning his room after the umpteenth he said he'd clean it but didn't. She had reached under his bed to grab old and dirty laundry, when instead her hand had found the letters, and after that Peter had moved them and made a reminder to lock his door. That still didn’t stop May from bringing up every chance she got.

“You should show them to [Y/N]!” She had advised once before, preparing some cauliflower in a stove pot. He only responded with a curt sigh and a shrug.

He didn’t think he’d ever show them to you. Especially not this one, the one that truthfully portrayed what he thought about you and how much he liked you, how much he wanted to spend most of his time with you.

––It’s day three hundred and seventy-eight since I’ve been best friends with you. Is it weird that I counted? It probably is, but you know me and I know you. So, I know that you know how weird I already tend to be. Besides the point—what I wanted to say was that, today had to be the most mesmerized I have ever been with you. Is that cliché? I know it is. But even though you always say you hate cliches, deep down you love them, because who doesn’t love clichés?

He wants to cringe at his own words, but instead he finds his lips curling into a grin, a grin holding back the burst of happiness that exploads within him at the mere mention of you.

[Y/N]...you’re, well, awesome everything to me such a great person, honestly. This is the sixth love letter I’ve written which is so dorky. I’m supposed to be a badass, remember? I’m Spider-Man! And incredibly cute. Why am I writing a love letter? Why have I written six of them? Because to be fair, I’m scared of you. You’re scary and intimidating, even though you don’t think you are. But what I want to say is, I’ve loved you every minute of every day or every month I’ve known you. It’s like no matter how hard I try to get you out of my head It’s no good.

Do you have any idea how much I wanna grab your face and kiss you on the goddamned mouth? With consent, of course. I’d always ask first. But you know that. I know I do. I do, I do, I do. I want to do everything with you. I want to visit bookshops with you—

He stops reading the letter and closes his eyes for a moment, only to open them a moment later when he receives a call from you. The ringtone is different because you asked him to change it, considerably because yodeling was never a good choice for a ringtone anyway, and you never understood why he was the way he was. His eyes flicker to the last line of the letter before answering your call.

I want to wish I could tell you this in person.

Peter enjoys writing about you, if he’s being honest with himself. It’s easier than drawing, which is the route most people takes, including Michelle. Sometimes, if Michelle is feeling less cynical than usual, she’ll give him a peak of a sketch of whichever boy or girl or whoever she liked that present week. The detail encapsulated with each line of lead interested Peter, but he wasn’t good at drawing pictures. He was good at taking them. But he already has quite a few of you, and they’re all hung up around his desk or strewn somewhere around his room where it seems messy but it’s just the way Peter likes things to be. He always somehow finds where everything is, including that one picture of the two of you at Coney Island that is currently shelf hopping around his room (and by currently, he means continuously).

He also likes writing about you because it makes it easier to pretend and make you the main character of the cheesy John Hughes movie he’s piecing together in his head whenever he sees you. He doesn’t expect anything from you. He just likes thinking about you. In his sentences and paragraphs, you were never a doubtless fantasy object—Peter had more respect for women and men and people than that—but it allowed him to imagine that somewhere there was a universe in which he had even a sliver of confidence buried deep within his gut that could someday push him into confessing all that he felt for you.

“And what are you thinking about, Mr. Parker,” you teased, interrupting him as he glanced up and grinned as you came into his field of view. His mouth also let out a sigh that was breathey and he licked his lips that were being nipped at by the cold New York air.

“You know...stuff.”

He said it in a way that sounded like him, which never really made sense to anyone but you two. Peter always sounded excited or nervous or innocent without intending to and he often hated it. The response only resulted in you lifting a brow as you sat next to him on the roof of his apartment building.

“Stuff...right. Is Tony Stark working you too hard? I’m sure there’s only so much web you can create on the daily,” You mutter, partly to yourself, but Peter still shoots you a look and nudges you gently with his elbow. “What? Am I wrong?”

”No, you’re ridiculous is what you are,” He retorts, rolling his eyes. His lips still threaten to split into a smile. ”I’m not thinking about that stuff.”

“Peter, would it kill you to be less vague? You’re really killing it with this superhero thing, aren’t you? You could use more descriptive nouns, you know.”

“Trust me, I have,” He starts, but he catches himself.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You ask him, but he doesn’t reply, he just stares intently at his backpack (his new and last one, according to Aunt May who was at her wits end with Peter’s ongoing backpack crisis). He had brought it up here to do some of his homework and focus, mainly because May was doing yoga and watching a workout DVD and he couldn’t handle all the noise. But he also brought along his second secret (six second secrets to be precise), in case inspiration struck, only to have you arrive unannounced ten minutes later. Big mistake.

He grabs his backpack, which was still severely unzipped and open, and tries to hoist it up on his shoulders, but you grab it.

“Pete, what’s up?” Peter doesn’t like when you worry about him, because it only reminds him of how much he really likes you. And how much he probably shouldn’t. Ned told him that the lines between your friendship were already blurred, but that just made Peter want to repaint it.

He’s awkward and he’s a gigantic dork, but around you he doesn’t find it a problem. When his feelings surface, that all changes.

“I gotta take care of––“

“Let me guess: stuff,” you finish for him, grabbing his backpack suddenly, spinning around to investigate it’s contents. “Whatever you’re worried about is in here!”

“Ever heard of privacy, [Y/N]? Come on, giveee,” he panics and whines, immediately grabbing for his bag. He’s careful and it’s only causing him to fail at taking it back. But he knows it better than disregarding his super strength and potetionally needing to ask May for another backpack. Or hurting you.

Almost certain you’ll find nothing, you start huff, until your eyes land on a stray piece of paper. It has Peter’s handwriting on it, his unmistakable and familiar handwriting, and you pull it out and hold it up triumphantly after skimming through the first lines.

“That’s what’s bothering you! You like someone!” You’re dodging his hands, and for a superhero, Peter’s never felt so slow. “Who is it? Can I read it?”

Deep down, it hurts to know that Peter likes someone. Your best friend. But you knew that the person must’ve been special for him to write about them. You knew Peter, and he never wrote unless it was occasionally for the school newspaper.

“No!” Peter snatches it from your hands, but you tumble forward, latching onto his arm as the both of you fell on your backs.

“Give it to me! Peter!”

Thus began the wrestling match. Peter had always, always known how competive you were, and determined, and he fondly remembered how you almost cried when he threw you the blue shell in Mario Cart. (You didn’t talk to him for three days.) He thought of taunting you lightly, with scattered of words of what, you want this letter? or sorry, i don’t know what you’re talking about, but figured they would only fuel your eagerness even more and he also knew how stubborn you were. And so, he resorted in hiding the letter behind his back as you leaped onto him, again and again, the both of you grabbing onto each other’s limbs and the thin piece of paper.

“Ha,” you yelled, finally sitting on his chest, holding the paper up high as you scanned a few sentences.

A few sentences was enough to see your name. Your name, written around like ink blots after words like beautiful and amazing, and around the crossed out errors and the small doodles he had taken the liberty of adding. Peter had only shouted, “[Y/N] don’t forget that we are on the roof and I will not hesitate to push you off!” as a joke, but gone increasingly quiet at the sight of the letter finally being in your hands.

“It’s...me.”

That was all you had to say, mainly because you hadn’t thought of anything else clever enough. Peter chewed his lip nervously underneath you and ran a hand through his hair, mumbling an apology.

"I know, it’s dumb. But could you give it back? I’d rather not face rejection with you also reading it. That’s too embarrassing.”

“Peter, I-I don’t know what to say.”

“Maybe you should try writing a letter.”

You smacked him lightly on the chest and got off him, helping him up. He may have tried to be sarcastic with you, but he was an open book. The nervousness and anxiousness was plastered all over his face like freckles, and his lips parted as he tried to steady his breathing. He fiddled with the hem of his dark blue physics-pun t-shirt and rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet.

“So...so do you like it?” He has said it so softly, you could have mistaken it for a gust of wind. Peter had thought about every scenario, every worst case scenario in his head and it was as if a nightmare was currently happening. Well, minus the gigantic spider (he knows, ironic isn’t it?).

“Yea,” you croaked, voice and throat suddenly dry. You cleared it and continued. “Yes. I mean, Peter, why didn’t you just tell me?”

“Because I didn’t want to. I like you, a lot. But I can’t just go up to you and spill it all out of mouth like slobber. That’s why I wrote some of those.”

“Woah, woah, some? There’s more?”

Peter groaned and wished that he had the superpower of teleporting to anywhere but here. “I’m going to stop talking now.”

“Pete, you do realize I need to read them all right? Now that I know they exist,” you told him, following him as he tried to turn away from you to hide how ashamed he was.

“Stop,” he whined, visibly pouting. “Just forget it, okay? This was so stupid.”

You stopped him from walking off, pressing your hand to his chest. Giving him a small smile, you pressed a kiss to his cheek, and you swore you felt him melt into your hand as it stayed there, caressing his face. It felt strange to some extent, holding your best friend the way you were, but nothing felt different. Well, not too different, not really. Sure, there was a little awkward tension now that the proclamations of love this boy had for you in paper had been read by your own eyes, now raveling around the nerves in your head—but this was the kid you knew inside and out.

If anything had changed in your friendship, relationship, whatever you and Peter had—it felt good, right.

“You don’t have to show me them if you don’t want to. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, and if I did, I’m sorry. But if it makes you feel better, I like you too. You big nerd. And that love letter? Really sweet.”

“You really liked it?” He mutters, eyes finally meeting yours, the glint in them almost sheepish. “You’re not just saying that?”

Eyes locked, you had no hesitation in your answer as you stare in wonder at the boy in front of you, hopeful, passionate—your idiot.

“No,” you whispered. “I’m not just saying that.”

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thecoroutfitters · 7 years ago

Link

Written by Wild Bill on The Prepper Journal.

Editors Note: This post might be better titled “ramblings from a mind turned to mush by our “information highway”. I had the luck to be on ARPANet before it was opened to the public in the great “explosion” of information (the “dis” being optional but applicable in the too many cases.) As people, and especially as Preppers we make decisions based on the facts we are presented and our interpretation of their accuracy, so this hits us at home every minute of every day.

I still tell a story I heard from a Civics Teacher in High School that goes like this – There was a horse race between a Russian horse and an American horse. The American horse won and the newspaper headline the following day at the New York Post read “American Horse WINS!” Pravda’s headline that same day read “Russian Horse Places Second, American Horse Finishes Next to Last!” – both are factual, both tell the truth. (The story was told to me with the American newspaper being the New York Times but I just could not bring myself to type that. It was awhile ago, when reporting the news was their agenda and the means by which they promoted their circulation.)

I am sure you have also all read or been told the theorem that if you put enough monkeys at enough keyboards eventually they will turn out the….Bible, or The Works of Shakespeare, or some other great historical accomplishment. I contend that the “internet, information highway” has disproved that theory.

My notes on what to point out, just the notes, are about to exceed 2,000 words so I will just put a couple in here and save the others for another day.

My Top Two: The Media and History

The Media, the Fourth Estate.

“It used to be that the media was called “the Fourth Estate” to accentuate the freedom of the press, not to be confused with the term “fourth branch” which proposes that they are not free from the government. The press is called the fourth estate in the United States usually because they observe the political process.” No longer, they are the political process, I believe they own the DNC as opposed to the other way around, but that may be the mush I alluded to earlier.

I know I am speaking to a lot of like minded people on this matter and won’t bore you reaffirming things we all know about the quality, or rather, the utter lack of journalistic integrity in America from the Fourth Estate. What you may or may not know is that it singularly poisons the world. I make no secret that I have traveled the world, been to every US state but one (Iowa), have been to 6 continents (I can see penguins in zoos), dipped my toes in the five major Oceans (though they are really just one), been to 7 Muslim ruled countries and on and on AND their news sources about America, and Americans, are AP (Associated Press) and all the alphabets – CNN, ABC, NBC, CBS, MSNBC and on and on as well a Reuters and all the others services.

Fox News and Breitbart and Drudge might as well not exist as they don’t really outside of North America and that isn’t 100% bad, I will expand on that in a little while. And yes, I know about Fox News Europe, and Breitbart Europe, but their market penetration in those markets is very low.

The media is a business and it sells content, period. It is just another channel on the TV or the internet trying to garner viewers to get improved Google Analytics to be used to sell advertising. Anyone who thinks that the Fourth Estate in America is doing it for any other reason is a candidate for, well, you fill in that sentence. Their are journalists with integrity, and a passion for what they do, I am sure, but if you want to succeed, you are an employee of the corporation and instructions come from the top like everywhere else. And there are shows hosted by people who care here and there, but it is still all show business and all about capturing advertising dollars. Am I cynical? Most likely but only from years of the droning, mock debates and the news outlets spinning news stories out of every current and over-the-hill celebrity’s tweets. Since I don’t spend a lot of time on the alphabets I will use Fox News and Breitbart as examples for this.

Any celebrity of any status in any industry is given the stage by them, their national pulpit as long as they can be quoted saying something that will infuriate their base, as determined by the Google Analytics they track and use as a determining factor in the generation of their SEO – Search Engine Optimization:

noun

COMPUTING

the process of maximizing the number of visitors to a particular website by ensuring that the site appears high on the list of results returned by a search engine.

“the key to getting more traffic lies in integrating content with search engine optimization and social media marketing”

This is taught at the college level, degrees in SEO are available from major universities across the country. In fairness I have taken college level courses in it to bolster my market penetration to reach more people. It is a normal business practice of all media outlets to have producers write incendiary comments on their posts on social media just to increase the number or responses they get as this too is a Google Analytics measure of success. When you see a post about say a successful NASA launch you can bet the comments on the post that go right to politics and attacks on politicians and have no relation to the subject matter are that producer looking to increase the number of replies to show that their content brought value to the business. It IS that crazy. It is spin in my opinion.

Fox News just today put out posts from members of the ensemble casts of the TV shows Grey’s Anatomy and The Big Bang Theory as “news” because they sent out tweets against the NRA and against Conservative reporters in this weekends trending analysis. THIS is what is being spun as “news” and promoted as a “fair and balanced” alternative to the lock-step mindset of the mainstream’s slighted view. Just how does one fathom this as news in the first place, and, as an American, how does one defend this as the historians of our age, because that is how our history will be recorded. And to that point, I’ll go a little deeper.

When I was an avid skier I subscribed to the big industry magazines – Skiing, Downhill, Ski and on and on and like all sports they put out their “annual review of what’s new” for the coming season. For skiing this was an August release. None of the products reviewed were ever given any criticism as the advertising for that issue of the magazine and other issues as well, was from these same manufactures. The beginnings of my skepticism (Yes, I can be a slow learner.)

I could go on and on about this as I am sure we all could. My hope is that we never take things at face value, that we do our own due diligence, that we question even when we see something that “exactly” expresses what we were thinking. The enemy of my enemy is NOT necessarily my friend. Be open, but never accepting without your own due diligence.

History: What is No Longer Taught

I asked the question of a learned friend last week “Just how does one learn from the past when they are never taught the past?” The measure of an education after all is that you acquire some idea of the extent of your ignorance. By this measure our education system is excellent.

The teaching of History at every level of the American Education System now leaves a lot to be desired. I apologize to that singular history teacher that is out there a voice in the wilderness, they do exist and we should exalt those that do and try. When my two children were in high school “history” was the assistant football coach showing PBS reenactment movies of historical events and people. I almost got arrested for my reaction to this, more correctly my reaction to the stonewalling and apathy I got when I tried to change this. I lobbied in vain through the PTA and directly to the district. At the time I was a single father with two kids in high school and did not have the financial means to put them in private school, but had the sense to know when they were being severely limited in their ability to compete for college with peers who were receiving a well rounded education. In hind sight at least there weren’t taught from the viewpoint that our founding fathers were rich white elitist slave-owning murderers, that came after.

Today I come across people almost daily who look at me like “who?” when I mention some historical figure and then they go right to their smart phones and Google the information, getting those same impeachable media sources I ranted about above. My laptop has the words “Who is John Galt?” on it’s top and whenever I bring it to a meeting I can see the strangers in the room googling John Galt.

I was a scientist, I have the periodic table app on my iPad called “The Elements” which was done by Theodore Gray. The graphics are amazing. Click on “U Uranium 92” and arrow to the description and here is the first sentence “It is impossible to discuss uranium without acknowledging that the first atomic weapon used in anger was a uranium fission bomb, built in secret lab deep in the deserts of New Mexico and detonated over the unsuspecting city of Hiroshima on the Honshu island of Japan.” While it certainly is possible to discuss this element, in the same context as all the others are discussed as opposed to the author’s revisionist view of historical events, it is of interest that there are blatant errors in this first sentence alone – there was a warning, it was ignored by the Imperial Japanese Command, just when was the first atomic weapon NOT used in anger used, Los Alamos is on a mountain top in north west New Mexico, I have property near there. BTW it has one of the most interesting interactive museums you will ever visit in the town itself. I have skied Pajarito Ski Area while visiting, it is managed by the labs, both my late wife and I did business with the labs which are still owned by the University of California. And following the first sentence you get 7 more paragraphs so laced with opinion and incorrect “facts” that no one could really learn much from this other than mankind is evil. This is just one obscure writing in a iPad app that probably isn’t on a lot of devices. But it is published as the truth. I almost suspect I will find Bitcoin mentioned in the description on Au Gold 79.

We have all seen example of how revisionist history is being taught, I can only imagine what it must be like to have kids in school today and seeing what they are taught, what homework assignments they are bringing home. Weekly we can read about yet another classic piece of literature “being dropped because it is offensive or non-inclusive.” Again, I don’t want this to be an indictment of teachers as there are great ones out there.

In my opinion the REAL power in America is wielded by educators. Period. They create and control everything your child sees, hears and reads in school and are only aided by the Fourth Estate which controls everything else they see, hear or read. Parents have been reduced to the lone voice in the wilderness. Once they enter the education system the education system gets the majority of their waking hours. In order to compete they must conform. If they question they may be subjected to ridicule, or worse. Most major school districts have an almost 1:1 ratio of administrator to classroom teacher.

My point is again, “Just how does one learn from the past when they are never taught the past?”

Sometime my rants run away with me….I look forward to your comments.

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didanawisgi · 4 years ago

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“The following is Sharyl Attkisson's complete response to questions posed by The Washington Post's Paul Farhi as prompted by a Media Matters propaganda blog. Please excuse our typos.

Farhi: Hello, Sharyl...I'm writing a story about Sinclair's coverage and commentary about the coronavirus and would like to talk to you about what you've been reporting on your show. I'm specifically interested in your thoughts about hydroxychloroquine, especially given your many years of skepticism about vaccines. Would you have a few minutes to spell out your thinking about this? I would appreciate it. Many thanks...Paul Farhi, Washington Post.

Attkisson: Hi Paul. Yes but if you are copying Media Matters, please take a look at my stories they reference and then we can talk! (Also, with respect, I do not have "many years of skepticism" about vaccines. I have reported on vaccine safety as I have reported on tire safety, charity fraud, etc. For example, I am not skeptical of tires just because I uncovered news about the Ford/Firestone rollover. But it is true that Media Matters and pharmaceutical interests have portrayed it that way and many have parroted that narrative. (that I am anti-vaccine etc) which is entirely false.

Read Attkisson's medical and vaccine reporting here.

Farhi: Fair enough. How *would* you prefer to be described, relative your vaccine reporting? Maybe: “SA has reported critically about vaccines,” or “who has raised doubts about the safety of vaccines,” or what?

Attkisson: Thank you for asking. I have reported on vaccines safety issues. My vaccine reporting has been cited as a reference in the New England Journal of Medicine and has been part of a group of medical stories receiving a finalist award from Investigative Reporters and Editors (IRE). I'm fully vaccinated, and then some, as is my daughter. The "anti=vaccine" name... narrative... is the thinnest of narratives yet successful and widely accepted among some... As you may know, Media Matters and its interests are a major driver of all of that. Wonder why. 😉

Farhi: So, the most neutral way into this is, “Sharyl Attkisson has reported extensively on vaccine-safety issues...” Except that suggests there ARE safety issues, especially (in terms of your reporting) the connections between vaccines and autism—which most in the medical establishment reject. Wouldn’t that kind of shorthand be defaulting to a skeptical position, one that is widely rejected by experts?

Attkisson: Well first, there is no dispute that there are vaccine safety issues; there is an entire court and compensation fund set up that has paid out billions of dollars to vaccine patients/victims... that's not the dispute. It doesn't mean all vaccines are dangerous (any more than all medicine is dangerous or safe). I certainly haven't suggested any such thing. Ever. And I think it's hard to accurately call me a vaccine skeptic having been fully vaccinated with a fully vaccinated child. And many stories I've reported are on the opposite side of a group. Firestone, Ford and NHTSA said the tires were safe. The govt. and many others insisted guns were never walked. That's how truth is often ultimately revealed or new facts come to light. As they have. What is your professional view of the govt.'s top pro-vaccine expert in court, a world renowned pediatric neurologist, who told DOJ that vaccines can and do cause autism in rare cases, after all? Newsworthy? Especially when he says (in a sworn affidavit) that DOJ misrepresented and covered up his findings? And names names? Whether you believe him or not, it's hard to argue that's not noteworthy. I wonder why so few reported that. Why shouldn't people hear his scientific views along with the other ones so widely pushed on them by so many interests? Also, do you think it's noteworthy that CDC's top immunization official acknowledges that certain conditions in children may make them susceptible to autism, and that a that should be investigated? (only the govt won't fund such studies for some reason). Also CDC's top immunization official acknowledges that's apparently what happened (vaccines triggered autism in a child with predisposition) in one landmark court case years ago... that the govt. secretly paid and had sealed so nobody else would know-- only it leaked out. Newsworthy? I think so.

Farhi: Well, I’m not looking for an argument; I’m looking for a description!

Attkisson: I'm not trying to argue. But people who make statements and cover this stuff often lack basic knowledge, they rely on what media matters and others have put out there without knowing the fundamental facts themselves so it's a difficult starting point. So the fairest thing might be to say the false defamatory things that critics say, you know, I'm anti-vaccine etc, but least least balance it with something about none of my stories ever being corrected or retracted, being cited in NEJM, finalist award, and if you get into vaccines and autism (interesting how it keeps coming back to that even when it has nothing to do with that)... that there certainly are many scientific experts and authorities who do not consider that a closed case. Including CDC head of immunization DeStefano and the govt's own one time pro vaccine expert who says vaccines can cause autism, after all. Or just leave it out. 😉 You might also recognize that I have covered many medical stories but mostly from safety/corruption/coverup etc rather than as a medical reporter, and broken news-- that was against the grain. Such as the diabetes drug rezulin that eventually got pulled from the market. I believe I was the first report who broke the story of Viagra's link to blindness which of course was soundly denied by most every medical authority initially. I reported on cholesterol drugs (statin) side effects that the experts and drugmakers denied but not appear as warnings on the label. now appear as warnings on the label.... I reported on ephedra before it was taken from the market. My track record is reporting accurately and responsibly on many medical safety issues.

Farhi: I want to contrast your vaccine reporting with your programs (yes, highlighted by Media Matters) on hydroxychloroquine. Again, not looking for an argument , just a way to fairly and accurately describe your approach. Whatever anyone thinks of HCQ, the science on it is far from settled. The fact is, we don’t really know if its reliable, safe or effective. You did two programs that, on balance, were favorable toward it. Given your reporting on vaccines—which are *overwhelmingly* safe—how do you square your relatively positive attitude toward a drug that people a lot smarter than both of us aren’t certain about? Further: Did Trump’s promotion of HCQ affect your approach? If so, how?

Attkisson: First of all, your premise that vaccines are overwhelmingly safe, shows (with respect) lack of understanding. That's like saying "medicine is safe." Certainly because one medicine is dangerous for some isn't an argument for stopping all medicine, nor does it make one anti-medicine. This is not in dispute: some vaccines are safer than others. Some are more effective than others. Some are considered more necessary than others.Some work well in some people but are harmful to others. You are implying, perhaps unintentionally, that there is an all or nothing proposition: one must say vaccines are overwhelmingly safe therefore do not look into any safety issues? Or if you do, then you are anti-vaccine? Tires are overwhelmingly safe, but dangerous or faulty tires should not be sold. It seems pretty simple. But when the narratives and interests enter the picture it becomes distorted. I deny being anti-car or anti-tire. This statement you made makes you, in the eyes of MM and the likes, a science denier: "Whatever anyone thinks of HCQ, the science on it is far from settled. The fact is, we don’t really know if its reliable, safe or effective." I agree with your statement and have not reported to the contrary. I have reported various scientific views and tried to report those which in today's narrative driven environment, come from credible sources but are not widely reported (or are actually avoided) by other media in their one-sided stories where they claim or imply (unlike your position) that the science is settled because hydroxycholorquine (they say) kills you. Whether it's this topic or any other, I am against the notion that we in the news should "censor" information that is in dispute or as yet unknowable, no matter how many people pretend or claim to know it... or how many don't want the information reported. Did you read my stories BTW? You are implying I said the science was settled and we shoudl all take hydroxycholorquine...?

Watch and read Attkisson's "Full Measure" cover story on hydroxycholorquine.

Farhi: Unfortunately, Sharyl, I cant really get into a debate with you on this because 1) You know more than I do about this topic. 2. I have neither the time nor space to play out the subtleties. So...I will settle for being as fair and as accurate as I can be in the three or four paragraphs I’m going to devote to this part of the story. So, back to my question: How should I describe your reporting on vaccines? And how should I describe your recent reporting about HCQ? You have the floor...

Attkisson: I'm still not sure what one has to do with the other except that the pharma interests always want to link vaccine stuff to anything they can controversialize. But bear with me for one more moment and then I'll try to succinctly answer. I'm pointing out that my article did not take the position you seem to be representing... so here are a few points I said: "Two divergent views of the drug, hydroxychloroquine, have emerged: the negative one widely reported in the press and another side you’ve probably heard less about." "Camps largely divided along political lines. Many right-leaning media figures sided with hydroxychloroquine while the left-leaning press backed remdesivir. Each accusing the other of ignoring real science." "On May 1, the FDA seemed to give remdesivir the edge, allowing emergency use for severely ill coronavirus patients at the same time, stepping up cautions against hydroxychloroquine and its sister drug saying they should only be taken in the hospital or as part of a formal study due to reports of “serious heart rhythm problems.” Dr. O’Neill is now leading a study to find out if hydroxychloroquine can serve a critical role as a medicine to prevent coronavirus. But he says the bad press is making it difficult." Question I asked in the piece: "How do you account for the difference in medical and scientific opinion about this drug? Because some people seem so certain that it can be a positive benefit to coronavirus patients, maybe even crucial in the early days, whereas some people are convinced it should absolutely not be used." And finally... "In the end, politics and money aside, at least some scientists aren’t ready to count hydroxychloroquine out of the coronavirus equation. Even if others already have. Sharyl: Is it possible that it's not one or the other— that hydroxychloroquine could be used in a certain setting, maybe for preventive if you find out that works, and the other drug could be used in other settings? Dr. O’Neill: No, Absolutely. I think, I think that it's just still very early in this disease process that we're going to learn lot. There's 600 studies that are being done in the United States right now on Covid to see all sorts of different kinds of infections and combinations. We're going to be a lot smarter at the end of the summer. So I think what I would just say to everybody, just hold your powder." That's hardly some kind of one-sided personal endorsement saying I know the end game. Quite the opposite. Please let me know when you've read the whole story, and I will work on a short response. http://fullmeasure.news/news/cover-story/hydroxychloroquine

Farhi: I’ve read the whole story. Please give me a short response.

Attkisson: Considering all the background I've provided, please be fair. As always, I strive to report on underreported topics and views being censored or ignored by much of the media, allowing viewers to have information and make up their own minds. My reporting on vaccine safety issues has been off the narrative of Media Matters and pharmaceutical interests (but I repeat myself…); yet represents views of credible government and scientific experts. It has been factual, fair and cited by a medical authority in the New England Journal of Medicine. My recent reporting on hydroxycholoroquine has also been factual and fair. It is only controversial in the annals of the Media Matters and pharmaceutical interests (and their disciples), but not from a journalistic or factual standpoint. As I reported, there are two divergent views of this medicine that have tended to fall along political lines, and the jury is still out. This is in contrast to the widespread reports that stated or implied the scientific case on hydroxycholoroquine as a potential treatment or preventive measure had been closed, even as mutliple studies on it— including by the government— were actively underway. Ironically, powerful interests are able to successfully direct media attention so that the scrutiny falls on the accurate reporting rather than the many false and misleading reports. The simple version of the takeaway in my report from well respected experts is, as my story stated: “politics and money aside, at least some scientists aren’t ready to count hydroxychloroquine out of the coronavirus equation. Even if others already have.” The idea that certain interests are working so hard to censor this information should be a red flag that leads all of us to ask why.

Farhi: Yep. Got it. Thanks.”

#Sharyl Attkisson #journalism #investigative reporting #investigative journalism #controversy #media

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missmeikakuna · 5 years ago

Text

Chad and the Incel Chapter 9

Rated: M

Fandom: Original Fiction (but inspired by the Virgin vs Chad meme)

Relationship type: Male/Male with a bit of Female/Female (the lesbians are adorable, btw) and unrequited Male/Female (in other words, the guys are bisexual).

Description: Chad is, well, a Chad, or at least he looks like one. He’s got his sights set on the cool nerd Becky and enlists the help of her shy incel ex-friend Noah, offering to help him get the gorgeous girl (Stacy) he desperately wants. Noah is reluctant to help, believing that he will be stuck in inceldom forever, but Chad’s interest in his life gives him hope. When their plans go awry, they start turning their romantic attention towards each other.

Content Warning: Given the subject matter, you can guess that this story has dark themes in it, such as suicide and self-harm (plus the mental health issues that often cause them), sexism, slut-shaming homophobia, biphobia and transphobia. There is also swearing and some mentions of sex but nothing too explicit (hence the M rating as opposed to an Explicit rating).

9th Post: [Venting] She’s not my friend

Chad looked up the term ‘trap’ and, amongst the discussion on how hot these anime characters were, he found some YouTube videos on why the word was offensive.

He messaged Noah on his phone, using terms he wasn’t used to using and concepts he wasn’t used to tackling.

So is this ‘trap’ thing just for crossdressing guys? Apparently people call transgenders or whatever that word. The transgenders don’t seem to like it or something like that. Do you know about this?

Noah didn’t reply, focusing on writing more posts and comments on the forum. Chad read through each post as well as some by other users and sent Noah the occasional phone message, causing Noah’s eyebrows to twitch in anger.

A lot of people are posting stuff on that forum about killing themselves. They keep mentioning ‘suicide fuel’. You okay?

Woah, someone just posted about wanting a handy from his mom. The fuck? You’re not like that, right?

Why are girl incels banned? I feel like if a dude incel and a chick incel met they could be together and stop being incels.

Hey, why didn’t you tell me I’m annoying? And I’m not a liar about being a virgin before we did it. I swear to God.

Noah sent Chad one message before exiting the forum.

If you don’t leave me the fuck alone I’m changing my username and never talking to you ever again.

At school over the next few days, Noah ignored the talkative Chad.

In the morning Chad said, ‘So, I watched an episode of one of those anime and it was pretty good. It was Cowboy somethingarather. Some website recommended it. I was surprised that there was a black chick in it. I thought anime characters were all white or something. Have you seen this show?’

While lining up in the cafeteria, Chad admitted, ‘I’m a little confused about this blackpill-redpill-bluepill thing. What’s the difference?’

As they walked to their lockers, Chad whispered, ‘Who runs that forum? It seems like chaos in there. People say all sorts of crazy stuff. I mean, feminists can be annoying and shit but I don’t think they’re running some kind of conspiracy to prevent you from getting girls.’

As they reached Noah’s locker, Chad added, ‘And some guy said that it’s over for guys with glasses because of genetics or whatever.’ He looked around to see if anyone was watching. ‘He’s gotta be joking! Glasses on guys?’ He hooked his finger into the collar of his own shirt, pulled the collar like he was in the middle of a heatwave and whistled as he tossed his head back.

Noah had to scowl at him for that, taking off his glasses for a moment just to spite him.

When the two were alone before homeroom one day, Chad kept trying to grab Noah’s hand but Noah kept pulling it away.

‘What’s wrong?’ Chad asked. ‘No one’s around. And we’ve done more than hold hands.’

Noah bit his lip and looked away. ‘I thought we weren’t going to talk about that.’

‘Sorry. But I don’t know if I really want to forget it. I’ve been thinking a lot about it, actually, how you expected it to be this perfect thing. Did someone on that forum say it’s supposed to be like that? I don’t know how they would be experts on that since they’re incels. But, I mean, it was still fun, right? You said it was okay and that’s better than bad.’

‘Has anyone told you that you talk too much?’

Chad laughed. ‘Not really. It’s just… I find it easy talking to you. Every time we talk I learn something new and it’s kind of exciting, learning about this incel thing. It’s like I’ve discovered this hidden underground village or something. I don’t know what it is about you.’

‘So you like me because I’m an incel?’

The smile on Chad’s face withered and died. ‘No. Oh my god, no way. I could listen to you talk about anything and I’d be interested. Your looks and that make for a deadly combo.’ He chuckled. ‘I think God did a great job creating you overall.’ His eyes widened. ‘Wait, uh, was that too much?’

Noah looked down at his hands, which were curled up on his lap. His eyes were shiny as if holding back tears.

‘Can you stop with the flattery? I know you’re probably great at flirting and attracting people, but do you really need to keep shoving it in my face? I get it, you’re so much more successful than I am. You’re soooo hot and you could have any femoid you want. Stop bragging and talking down to me.’

‘Sorry about that, but I’m not brag-’

‘Of course you are! You keep bringing up the goddamn forum and how shitty you think the people are on there. Stop trying to act like a damn knight who’s here to rescue me from inceldom. It’s patronising as fuck. And that thing about God making me is stupid. Do you seriously think some magic bearded dude in space made me? Bullshit.’

‘Oh, right, you’re an atheist. Sorry. I kind of forgot. Not that I forget other things about you! I remember a lot.’ Chad paused to collect his thoughts before spouting anything he’d regret. ‘I guess I’m kind of a Christian, though I don’t really go to Church much.’

‘Christian, huh? That explains why you’re so stupid.’

Chad stood up, his chair making an ear-piercing squeak as it was pushed backwards.

‘Hey, that’s not fair!’ He leaned down until he and Noah were the length of a nose apart. ‘Didn’t you hear what I said? Yeah, I believe in some higher power but I’m not some Bible-thumping crazy or anything like that!’

‘Really? I bet when everyone comes through this door you’ll get out of my face and act like you’re not interested in me, like a good Christian boy.’

As soon as he said that, several students entered the classroom, prompting Chad to turn away and sit back down, keeping his hands to himself.

Noah smirked at him before returning to ignoring him.

At home, Noah posted onto the forum. He hadn’t originally planned on posting that day but he had to test something.

Rotcel2003- [Venting] She’s not my friend.

I thought I’d just made a female friend but it turns out she’s not my friend. You can’t trust femoids. You’re just a placeholder until a Chad comes along.

Noah put his watch into timer mode and waited twenty seconds until the message arrived.

Who’s the girl? :( Good for you, I guess. Well, except for her being untrustworthy and shit.

Noah furiously typed one word to Chad.

Creep

He placed his phone onto his desk and collapsed onto his bed. He remembered what someone said to him on Incels.me.

Gay men are just coping incels.

The word ‘coping’ stood out to him. He had heard other incels refer to many other things as a ‘cope’: video games, watching sports and drawing to name a few. Copes were a distraction from the truth, which was that an incel like him could never truly be happy.

It took him half an hour to get out of bed and pick up the laptop. He opened the closet and carefully placed it on the floor inside it. He wanted to just drop the laptop to the ground but, cope as it was, his gaming laptop was expensive. He stacked his physical games next to the laptop. He then looked down into the closet and sighed, remembering who had been in this exact place not long ago. He shook his head. He wasn’t done yet.

He made room in his drawers, an easy task given the lack of quantity his clothing collection had. He put his anime figurines, DVDs and manga in there. He ran out of space to put the model planes in there, so he put them under his bed. He then deleted the manga reader and anime streaming apps on his phone.

He turned his mirror around until it faced him and the image of smoke clouded his mind. His hands curled into fists and he decided to use one of those fists. Soon the small crack spread to the rest of the mirror. He wiped the blood that seeped out of his hand.

As a final touch, he ripped the posters from the wall. As he reached the lone NFL poster, he bit his lip and blinked quickly. He wasn’t going to cry over some creep. He shoved them under his bed next to the planes.

He looked around the room and noticed how plain and empty it looked. He sat on the bed and smiled at the one piece of decoration left, the cat-themed quilt.

Cope, he thought. He pulled the quilt off the bed and pushed it under the bed. He turned off the lights, slipped between the sheets and lied there, trapped between walls blackened by night. He shivered without the quilt but persevered. There was no point in doing anything that made him happy. All he could do was, as the incels say, lay down and rot.

#virgin vs chad #chad x incel #bisexual #romance #drama #original fiction #breaking stereotypes #lesbian #Chad and the Incel

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fyrapartnersearch · 5 years ago

Text

So it is written

Hello and good day.

This will be probably my last post on FYRA for a longer period of time. But I hope to find at least one who would share my interest. Anyways back with a new request! This one will be more specific as it only targets one certain fandom. I have had plenty of amazing original roleplays in the past, but now my desire is slowly favoring canon universes once again. It makes character building (in my opinion) also a greater challenge which I also quite enjoy to be honest. I have a strong penchant for including original characters and ideas that can be added to the pre-existing plot. Also very happy to expand on the given worlds and open to AU’s. Okay so I am a really big nerd when it comes to the supernatural, mysterious, urban myth and fantasy. Love combining those given elements with organized crime, complex characters, cataclysmic events and dark schemes that all unravels as time goes on.   Just so you know, a little about me.

You must be at least 18+ of age when you want to start original roleplay with this gal here. As I am in my twenties, I prefer maturer partners. I accept anyone, regardless if they are male or female. What I expect is a decent (if not very good) grasp on grammar, the ability and will to write creatively, shoulder a great part of the plotting and responsibility as well as passion for roleplaying. Of course this should be seen as a fun hobby but I really like to invest… I wish for my partner / friend to take equal initiative.   Here are my cravings and guidelines! Even though they are only limited to a few, I made sure to filter out the ones I know I wouldn’t role-play anytime soon. So if you are interested in something I didn't mention here, I am afraid I have to decline. Sorry.   Btw, call me Gil ;)   The roleplay I have been wanting to do for such a long time is none other than Devil May Cry.  Replaying the game brought back some really good and nostalgic feels - but the latest game one was one of the best in my opinion. Such creativity, especially with urban mythology, monsters and other interesting elements. Hence why this game is right up my alley and one of my favourites of all time. If this does not interest you as much, I am also keen on roleplaying Castlevania or next gen Harry Potter! But my main interest still remains with DMC, just so you know. :)  What it entails: 

Alright, so you are writing with some of mature age. I have 11 years of writing experience when it comes to the game. This will be a fair warning that this request is not for the faint of heart. There will be violence, swearing, gore, intimate scenes, uncomfortable subjects, drama, conflict and other dark themes included within the story. I have few limits but I will respect the boundaries of my partner, so do not shy away from telling me. Just so you know, I won’t fade to black or skip out on the nitty gritty. Go big or go home. Interests: My line of interests are very dynamic when it comes to genres. I love conceiving my own lore inside a stories, be it an original or a pre-existing story. Gothic fantasy among others are one of my favourites. I am not opposed to tapping into some science fiction, action, romance, crime, action or thriller genres, in fact I encourage it. Inspirations for me are Lovecraft, Hellsing, Blade, Underworld, etc. As for the fandom inspired RPs, I am more than willing to bend some rules and be a little indulgent. Writing: 3rd person perspective. My writing is wide-ranging and flexible, which means that frequently, word count will go up 1000+ per reply - though it highly depends on the given situation and partner. Quality over quantity as they say - but why not both? I love detail in description, and I am actively seeking someone of the same infamy. My partner should have a basic grasp on grammar, punctuation and somewhat of an interest in knowledgeable writing. I also double! (preferably, but we can always discuss whether it makes sense for our roleplay our not.) World building and sharing the burden: You should be active and help me shape the world around our characters. Even if we discuss many things during and before the roleplay, how we wish for things to play out and take its course, I am always happy to be surprised with a secret of my partner’s character I didn’t know before. You don’t need to lay out all your cards on the table… keep it a little mysterious and suspenseful. Just enough so we can work with the ideas, but not completely kill off the suspense. Characters: I write canon as well as OC characters. Faceclaims, GIFs, drawings, mood boards or just a plain physical description is absolutely sufficient. Whatever floats your boat when it comes to visualising your character and their backstory, I’m on board. Characters should be written as opulent, flawed, unique, talented, heroic, villainous, spiteful, angry, and everything in-between figures. In other words, don’t be scared of making them ‘human’, even when they are non-human. Romance: Openly play and accept characters of both genders, preferable m x f pairings, but I am open to m x m and f x f relationships as well. I have more experience with m x f relationships, so I might be more adept with this one. If the chemistry of two characters compel me, I will ship them no matter what! When it comes to sexual scenarios and intimacy (intercourse, foreplay, all that jazz). I encourage eroticism, but always in a tasteful, sensual manner (that goes for romance as well). The passion must be felt through the screen, even if it’s just a mere description of someone’s deep train of thought. Content: Drama, violence, sex, metamorphosis, symbolism, action, romance, pretty much everything is a-okay. I am unbothered by certain subjects that may or may not be uncomfortable for the general public. Roleplays are fictional stories and we best keep viewing them as such. If there are things you are uncomfortable with, name them and I shall respect those boundaries. But don’t be surprised when suddenly one of our characters bites the dust, or gets tortured. It may be difficult to write and read, but it is all part of the story and furthering the plot. My roleplays imply and involve brutality, mayhem, psychological and physical torture as well as other things. But I also endorse beauty, serenity and placid moments, scenes or characters. I love it when it comes full circle… everyone- and everything has a beautiful and hideous side. Both should be embraced like Yin and Yang. Communication and friendship: OOC-chat friendly! I love meeting new people and making friends. Plus it strengthens the compatibility between us. Communication is the alpha and the omega. If there is anything that bothers you, or if you think you are left out in some way (be it a mistake on my part or we’re both at fault here), don’t be scared to tell me. Really, it won’t be taken personally - since I know that we slip up every now and then, we’re only human after all. It is also completely sufficient if you only type out a few messages per week. I am super chill about it. It doesn’t bother me re-writing a scene to fit the narrative more. If there are mistakes, they can be corrected - just to get that out there. We can always exchange opinions and see what would benefit the story most. I will also voice my opinion should something arise that could be bothersome. Partnership: An active roleplayer is wanted without a doubt. Can’t do the thinking for two now. Let’s row this boat together Limits: Subject matters I avoid are pedophilia, bestiality, necrophilia, vore, scat, furries and various other bizarre fetishes. Also no one-liners or text-talk messages. The sentences have to be cohesive, coherent and decently structured.    Now a little more information about myself.

I live in CET central Europe. My response rate varies throughout the weeks, depending on my schedule.  I study at a university full time and work a job on the side and both are keeping me fairly busy. My writing will increase most likely during the weekends. If I should hit a hiatus, I will let you know as soon as possible. I understand when you are busy as well and won’t be able to respond, though I prefer if my partner does not ghost me. At least let me know what’s going on so I can adjust and put the roleplay on hold if needed!  Mediums I roleplay on are email and googledocs. Though I also have Discord in case for OOC chat!   I prefer if my partner messages me first on email, giving me a brief description of themselves, their cravings as well as ideas. That way I can see if we’re compatible and if it bears any potential.   Message me here: EMAIL: [email protected] Hope to hear from you soon! Lots of love!    

Yours sincerely,

-Gil

#indie rp #independent roleplay #oc rp #multiple paragraph #para #long term #email #tumblr #aou rp #submission

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