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thevioletjones · 5 years ago

Note

10 & 59 for the fic prompt meme!

This is the longest ficlet yet. Lol. It’s also combined with similar requests from @yellowcerulean & @tarantula-teeth for an added 34 & 8. So I give you...

Criminal AU / I didn’t mean to turn you on / Mutual pining / Detective AU

Mickey shook his leg and bit his thumbnail, his agitation overwhelming all his senses. It felt like he was trapped beneath a tsunami and was never going to be able to breathe again. He was totally and completely fucked.

At least he wasn’t handcuffed at the moment, which was kind of strange, but he wasn’t about to question it. He just wished one of them detective dickheads would come question him already so he could ask for a lawyer, get charged, and be on his way to jail. Sitting around here in the interrogation room was too nerve-wracking. They all knew how this was gonna end, so he resented all the wasted time.

According to the clock on the wall, he’d been sitting there staring at the blank wall for 45 fucking minutes now. He knew they did that shit on purpose… like antsiness was supposed to loosen tongues. Really, it just made people more pissed off. Being held against one’s will already sucked enough.

Finally, some dude walked into the room, his red head down as he read a case file. The door closed heavily behind him as he took a seat across the table from Mickey, still not making eye contact.

“Mickey Milkovich. Long time, no see. How’s your sister?”

Mickey’s eyebrows shot up. “Huh?”

The cop looked up at him then, a lopsided smirk on his fuzzy face. “Mandy. I haven’t seen her in ages. She doing alright?”

Mickey shrugged. “Yeah, she’s fine. Why do you give a shit, pig?”

The ginger-beard just snickered. “Guess you don’t remember me then.” He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. “I was a lot scrawnier then, rounder face, kinda goofy looking, couldn’t sprout a whisker to save my life…”

Mickey just stared at him like he couldn’t give a fuck less.

“I’m Ian. Gallagher. Detective Gallagher, if you’re nasty.”

That made his mouth drop open in surprise. Holy shit. Gallagher? He definitely remembered the teen version. Him and Mandy had been attached at the hip for years back in high school. Mickey never talked to him much, but he was around their house an annoying amount of the time. He looked… very grown up. Too bad he was a fucking cop. And straight to boot.

“Yeah, whatever. I remember you. Can we get this shit over with? Makin’ me sit here all goddamn night is fuckin’ bullshit.”

“Fair enough,” said Ian, folding his hands together on top of the file. “You wanna give me your side of the story before I start asking specific questions?”

“Ain’t it pretty self-explanatory, man?”

“Not necessarily. You were caught in the raid, in flagrante, but there seems to be some confusion as to the extent of your involvement in the prostitution ring.”

“What the fuck does that mean? I ain’t a part of shit!”

“Look, we’re aware of the hand-whore brothel your dad used to run out of the Alibi some years back, as well as the connection between Terry and the Bartkowicz brothers running this ring. Obviously, we have your prior arrest records, which coincidentally all seem to be related to dear old dad, so… you see why we have questions now?”

Mickey slammed both his fist down on the tabletop and stood brusquely, knocking his metal chair to the floor. “This is fuckin’ bullshit! You can’t pin this shit on me!”

Ian stood tall and menacing. “Sit down, Mickey.”

“Fuck you! I ain't listenin’ to anymore of this!”

He tried to march straight to the door, but found himself running into a wall of built redheaded dick. Before he could think better of it, he pushed Ian forcefully, then suddenly found himself knocked sideways into the wall, and in no time he was pressed against it chest first, arm twisted painfully behind him, with a forearm against his neck.

“I’m gonna give you one more chance to sit here without the fucking cuffs on and answer my questions. You try something again, and I’ll get one of the bruisers that likes to bust heads in here to put ‘em on your hands and your feet. Got it?”

Shit. The only thing Mickey was getting was a damn killer of an erection. That would be the worst thing to let on given the circumstances, so he nodded vigorously as best he could.

“Yeah, yeah, man. Sorry.”

Ian's body moved away, and Mickey felt cold at the loss, turning around slowly with his hands up. Gallagher pointed at him, then to the chair he’d previously occupied, eyeing Mickey apprehensively. Once he was seated again, the detective sat back down as well.

“Believe it or not, I’m trying to help you. For Mandy’s sake. I won’t be able to if you pull stunts like that. I know you wouldn’t rather be dealing with one of the other guys on the task force.”

Mickey sighed and sagged in his chair. “Whatever, man. I don’t know anything. And I ain’t actually just sayin’ that. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. That’s it. I don't work for my piece of shit father anymore.”

Ian gave him an incredulous look, then re-opened the file on the table, thumbing through a few pages deep. Mickey watched as he read whatever the fuck was written there, and the way those orange eyebrows suddenly shot up, and Ian sent him a stunned look.

“What?” asked Mickey.

Ian cleared his throat and looked back at the page. “It says here that you weren’t busted with a woman.” Mickey gulped. “You were busted with a man.”

Mickey struggled to keep his cool, but quickly schooled his features. “So?”

“You’re gay?” Ian asked bluntly.

“Nah, I just like havin’ another guy’s dick in my ass.”

Ian’s mouth slowly lifted into an unreadable kind of smile. “Wait here.”

And just like that, Ian was gone, and Mickey was most definitely totally fucked. No way South Side cops were gonna go easy on the fag criminal son of a dude they all fuckin’ despised with a fiery passion. Gallagher had probably gone to get a whole squad to bash on him until they transferred him into gen pop.

He went back to shaking a leg and biting his nails, and it felt like fucking forever before Ian returned.

He was still alone, and he stood in the middle of the room for a moment and just stared at Mickey. After the dramatic pause, he said, “You’re free to go.”

Mickey’s jaw dropped yet again. He knew for a fact he’d been looking at about 30 days jail time, or at the very least, some hefty-ass fine for solicitation.

“What the fuck you mean I’m free to go?”

“Exactly what I said. You’re free to go.”

“How?” Mickey shouldn’t be glued to this fucking hot seat asking questions, but he couldn’t help it. It was like the damn Twilight Zone.

Ian shrugged. “I took care of it. From one queer on the DL to another.”

Mickey gasped. “You fuckin’ serious? Didn’t you used to date my sister?”

“I did. In a sense. She knew who I was from the beginning. Did me a favor. We protected each other. This is just an extension of that. Besides, I always kinda had a crush on your dirty, crude, thug ass. Even though you were always an asshole and never looked at me twice.”

If Ian kept shocking Mickey like this, he was gonna need a defibrillator to get his heartbeat back on the proper wavelength. What the actual fuck?

“Oh, I looked twice, Gallagher,” he replied, rising, “you just never caught me.”

Ian laughed. “Until now apparently.”

Mickey flipped him off and followed Ian out of the room. For some reason, he was escorted all the way to the station door.

“Stay outta trouble, Milkovich,” Ian called to him as he walked into the night.

Mickey smirked and turned around as he kept walking. “You know where I live if you got a problem, Gallagher.”

Seeing Ian’s reciprocal smile, he turned back around and pulled his cigarettes out. Definitely not how this night was supposed to go, but maybe Red would come see about him sometime.

#ficlet #trope challenge #ian x mickey #gallavich

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fieldbears · 6 years ago

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Siren - the soft queer poly diverse mermaid show I had never heard of

So I am going to start yelling about Siren because I have seen/heard very little hype for this show and I think a lot of people would like it... here we go. I’m on the 4th episode. You can watch this on Hulu.

Would you like to watch a fun kissy mermaid show? Do you love a strong cast of supporting actors from various backgrounds who have been underappreciated by Hollywood? Did you love The Fifth Element’s Leeloo but wish she wasn’t so selectively helpless toward the end?

First warning: some of the acting is Lacking. I will not name names. But it’s important to note that someone VERY wisely decided that if their white male protagonist was not going to be extremely talented at Tones and Expressions, the least they could do would be to take a page from Teen Wolf’s book and make him the softest, goodest boy who drinks his Respects Women Juice with every meal. Ben starts out as a generic American dude but is slowly revealed to be curious, EXTREMELY forgiving, and very empathetic.

Second warning: a lot of the plot reads like fanfic. But ... woke fanfic. Hold on, I can explain: in the first episode, our Everyman is driving down a winding road when he spots a Mysterious Naked Girl stumbling around, lost, who then FAINTS. I think that’s bingo already, right? But here’s the thing - this show embraces a lot of fun cliches but, so far, abandons the problematic shitty ones. Ben, the Everyman? 0% skeeve, 0% male gaze. The helpless moment for the Mysterious Girl? That’s really the last time we see her be defenseless. Even when she’s clearly Lost or Confused, she still keeps her agency, picking up new information and making the most informed decisions she can; she’s also perfectly capable of dealing with anyone who threatens her.

(Which, TW for anyone who does not feel comfortable seeing an attempted rape scene: she takes a ride with a strange guy who seems nice at first, and it goes badly for him. If you want to skip past it, all you need to know is that he tries to take some liberties and she literally eviscerates him and throws him through the windshield. She moves on immediately and clearly has no remorse of any kind about what she did to protect herself.)

Third final warning, pretty mild: the Generic Bad Guy Military is out to experiment on the mermaids! Their facilities are... poorly designed! Their protocols are ... unclear! Their opsec is.... nonexistent??? The actors playing high-ranking military personnel are... not well suited for the parts they’re playing! This warning is really only for people who cringe at lack of trigger discipline in films, or otherwise know just enough about weapons or US Military Stuff to see when something isn’t well researched. But they’re more of a vehicle for plot, and so it’s easy not to sweat it too much.

Now on to the positives. I have many more positives than I do warnings.

The mermaids look fucking rad. I’m sorry, but I’m opening with this. The notes were clearly “realistic, but also gorgeous, and also predatory as fuck.” Look:

For a narrative with so many opportunities for dumb choices, they never Split the Party or Go Investigate That Weird Noise. We’ve got a cast of mostly young adults, none of whom have the full picture of what’s going on, but even the two Cliche Dude Bros have real scenes of discussing their feelings! Working out their misunderstandings! Doing their best to trust each other! It’s extremely refreshing - so far the various tensions aren’t brought on by needless lack of communication or love of drama.

Speaking of lack of drama, I have been holding onto this long enough, they are setting up a poly triad and I am fucking here for it. The two main human protagonists are dating, and work at a marine biology center together. As they learn more about Mysterious Girl together, they both become closer to her. Without spoiling anything major, there have been some scenes that are very clearly laying the groundwork for Clear Consent and Lack of Jealousy - this human couple has a healthy relationship and while plot is definitely happening very constantly and very loudly, there is an undercurrent of, this Mysterious Girl? This extremely pretty, extremely fascinating Mysterious Girl? Seems to like us? Both of us? Her cheekbones are unreal and we don’t know how to deal with this yet? It’s very sweet.

This show has real parts for extremely underappreciated POC actors. I haven’t seen Fola in anything before, which is criminal, not just because I’m extremely gay for her but because I want to see how her performance changes when she isn’t concentrating on an American accent. Gil Birmingham, who you definitely recognize on sight if not by name, plays her father, a competent (!!) sheriff who is clearly a good man (!!!!) and so far is getting a lot of screen time as he investigates Mysterious Things. You also know Patrick Gallagher, who plays the level-headed local doctor who Can Absolutely Tell Something Is Up. Curtis Lum and Ian Verdun play the dudebros, and Rena Owen plays a local weird lady and gets to use her own accent. Lastly, Sibongile Mlambo plays a Second Mysterious Girl, who is coming into the narrative more as we go on. I’M NOT EVEN NAMING ALL OF THEM. The white people are, off the top of my head, Ben Softboy Protag, his shitty family, and... most of the government folks? Of those, Softboy Protag is the only one with significant screen time.

And let’s talk interpersonal roles. So far, the show follows Ben the most, but it’s fairly clear so far that the show isn’t interested in establishing him as The Leader. There’s a vague Scooby Gang coming together, only two of whom are white men, and nobody’s taking on a leading role so much as negotiating and discussing what is best in These Mysterious Circumstances. I have so far gotten no Black Best Friend vibes and I am hopeful moving forward.

Also, not much is made of the fact that Ben is dating a WOC. His mom has made one shitty comment about how he always liked the ‘wild’ ones, but it’s unclear if that’s because Maddie... has tattoos? Isn’t rich? The mom is clearly set up to have shitty opinions, so the line is definitely a reflection on her and not on Maddie or the relationship. Also, and I realize how low this bar is, but: Maddie has Native American ancestry on her father’s side, and this is made clear without any unnecessary mysticism, cliche music in the background, anything. There are points where her knowledge of myths leads to interesting dialogue, but it’s not presented in... you know... that way?

That’s what I have so far. Yeah. Hulu.

#siren #show recs #YELLING ABOUT QUEER POLY THINGS #YELLING ABOUT STRONG DIVERSE CASTING #YELLING ABOUT BITCHIN FANTASY DESIGN WORK

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shamelessly4shameless-blog · 7 years ago

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130lb of Ukrainian Courage (pt 18) ‘Fuckin’ Milkovichs/Bachelor Party pt.1′

Ian wanted to go down to the court house and get married immediately. Mickey wanted to save up for a few months and try to have a proper do. They compromised and set themselves a target of four weeks. It isn’t long enough to save but it’s long enough to plan a party, get a couple of things together and let Mickey feel like he is doing right by them.

Due to the time scale it it’s going to be a ‘cost-effective’ wedding which is Ian’s delicate way of saying that what with the time he had off to recover, the new house and putting food on the table for Mandy, they are (as Mickey put it less delicately) ‘poor as fuck’.

With that in mind Ian lets go of the fleeting idea of matching suits, matching gold bands and a mini-tux for Yev. Despite Mickey being the one who insisted on having an actual wedding, predictably it is Ian who takes over the wedding planning. However, Mickey takes more interest than anyone, including himself, expected him to and offers opinions on most things including the rings Ian is looking at on his battered old laptop. Side by side on the sofa, Ian is half focussed on browsing and half concentrating on fingering the in-seam of Mickey’s pants, enjoying the small noises of appreciation each movement earns him.

They’re on an online Gothic themed jewellery store that sells silver bands when Ian turns the screen round and doubtfully shows it to Mickey, he is instantly taken with a medium width band called ‘Blood and Bone’.

“Fuckin’ sweet name, man.”

“It’s part of their … eternally enslaved collection.”

Ian wrinkles his nose but Mickey just grins and grips the back of Ian’s neck tightly, leaning in to kiss him hard.

“Kinky. I like it. Get two of those.”

“You sure? I mean I like the style but the name ...”

“It’s a kick-ass name. Better than ‘Happily ever after’ or some shit.”

Ian shrugs, happy that Mickey is happy and orders two rings for less than half the price of one traditional gold band.

“You sure you don’t mind it being silver? If you want gold ...”

Mickey rubs the back of Ian’s neck lightly, his brows knitted

“Nah. Silver’s good. Gold doesn’t really suit your whole ‘Ice King’ look.”

“Excuse me?”

“You know: black hair, pale skin, blue eyes, black clothes...”

Ian breaks off realising that he is getting The Annoyed Tongue as Mickey’s eyebrows raise and a bulge forms in his left cheek.

“It’s sexy, Mick.”

“Sounds fuckin’ weird. I got different colour clothes.”

“Yes you do.”

Ian agrees. He knows from experience that agreeing is the way to end this discussion swiftly and that a swift resolution is for the best. Mickey lights a smoke and eyes him suspiciously but lets it drop as Mandy wanders in, yawning.

“What’s up?”

“Ordering rings.”

Ian grins and sits back to let Mandy have a look at them on screen as she leans over the back of the sofa.

“Sweet name!”

She exclaims happily and Mickey gives Ian a smug look which earns him a cheerful middle finger.

“Oh hey, I gotta ask you something”

Mickey says, craning his neck to look up at his sister who is eyeing his cigarette wistfully

“Yeah? What?”

“Don’t sound so fuckin’ suspicious.”

Mickey scowls and Mandy rolls her eyes, walking round and dropping herself dramatically into his lap and breathing in the heady smell of tobacco.

“What the f...”

Mickey leans back in his seat, scowl deepening as Mandy grins up at him and flicks his chin.

“Can’t shove me, I’m pregnant.”

“Wanna fuckin’ bet? Move your ass!”

Mandy stands up and ruffles her big brothers hair affectionately

“Okay dicksplash, what did you want to ask?”

“No forget it.”

Mickey grouches, smoothing his hair back down but Ian gives him a swift kick and opens his eyes wide, prompting him.

“What?”

Mandy’s interest is piqued and she glances between the two of them impatiently

“I was gonna ask if you … if you wanna be my best man.”

Mickey looks up from under shyly lowered brows and Mandy’s face softens into a sweet little smile

“Really? You’d really pick me?”

“Well apparently I can’t pick Ian,”

Mickey shrugs, shooting his fiancé a slightly dirty look, still not over Ian’s rebuff of that particular request.

“So yeah. I guess I pick you.”

“Awww Mickey...”

Mandy wraps her arms tightly around him from behind and Mickey suffers the squeeze as well as he can, awkwardly patting the forearm locked around his throat.

“You wanna do it or not?”

“Of course I do! This is gonna be so great!”

Mandy releases her death grip and kisses the top of his head.

“I’m going to start planning your bachelor party right now!”

She kisses him again, and then looks at Ian

“Who is your best man?”

“Lip.”

He looks almost apologetic but Mandy just shrugs, chin held high.

“Great. Mick, who do you want at your party?”

“I don’t know … you and Iggy? Maybe Svet?”

Mickey gives her his usual impatient glance and Mandy nods. To be honest, she really isn’t sure who else she would invite. Her brother has never really had friends and the only person he really likes hanging out with is Ian. So it’s going to be small, fine, that doesn’t mean it won’t be wild. Mandy grins at him and does a double thumbs up

“It’s going to be awesome. I’m on it!”

“Can’t wait.”

Mickey drawls but both Ian and Mandy see the little excited twinkle in his eye and share a knowing glance. Fuckin’ Milkovichs.

Lip draws on his cigarette and eyes his little brother frankly. They’re in a booth at the Alibi although neither of them is drinking anything stronger than soda. They could go somewhere else, Lip almost definitely should but it’s familiar and they’re both comfortable so they stay.

“I’m not inviting Mickey.”

“I know.”

Ian nods but Lip holds up a stern finge

“I mean it, Ian. He’s not coming.”

“Jesus! Okay … wait, why?”

“Because I want to get some seven foot Adonis to wiggle his balls in your face without having to cough up bail money for your fiance.”

Ian rolls his eyes and grins, sipping his cola and running the cool glass between his fingers ignoring his brother’s lewd grin.

“A stripper? Really?”

“Yes. A stripper. At a Gay club and the only reason I’m telling you this is because I need to know which ones you worked at so I can avoid them.”

“Uh … I never worked at Heavy Load or Jack Hammer.”

Ian blushes slightly realising that those are two of the only clubs he hasn’t pulled a shift or two at. Lip taps the names into his phone and nods.

“Cool. So now, are you sure you want to join the ranks of the indoctrinated married folks of this fair land?”

“I am. It’ll be good for us.”

Ian fiddles with the label on his jacket sleeve and it is Lip’s turn to roll his eyes

“You’ve loved him for your whole fucking life. How does a piece of paper...”

“You’re being a shitty best man, I just want you to know that.”

Lip grins his usual sardonic little grin and shrugs.

“So are you becoming a Mil...”

He bites the question off and clears his throat guiltily

“Sorry, man. Stupid question.”

“No it’s not stupid.”

Ian frowns. He has no intention of taking Terry’s family name but isn’t sure how to bring it up with Mickey.

“We haven’t actually talked about it.”

He admits finally.

“Mickey Gallagher works fine. Sounds about as Irish as it gets.”

Lip jokes and Ian’s frown clears at the thought of Mickey being a Gallagher.

“I guess I could ask him, see what he says.”

“Yeah you should. We got a an ex-con landlord, an alcoholic genius, a bipolar queer, a teen mom, an juvie kid turned military, and a black kid with two white parents. We got room for a ...”

“Whatever you’re about to call my fiancé, massively fuck you, Lip.”

Ian dips his finger in his cola and flicks it at his big brother.

“Seriously though, I’m really happy. I want this, man.”

Ian is radiating so much happiness that Lip wants to tell him he’s a fricken’ beacon and there really isn’t any need to tell anyone but what he says instead is simply:

“I know.”

“And I want you to be better with Mickey.”

“We do fine together. We had a coffee that time...”

Lip grimaces at how feeble that sounds. One coffee in ten years of knowing the guy. Ouch.

“You pick on him and you press his buttons ...”

“Dude! Come on. Mickey is like a human fucking calculator! He’s 99% buttons.”

“And he’s good at math too.”

Ian smiles smugly as Lip sighs impatiently and taps his finger on the vaguely sticky table top.

“I guess I could tease him a little less.”

“And I want you to say something nice about him in your speech.”

Ian finishes his mental list of demands and sits back contentedly. Lip raises his eyebrows at his little brother and sits back in his chair.

“You’re turning into a proper groomzilla.”

“I know. But do it anyway.”

It’s going to be far too much effort to bicker so instead they clink glasses and Lip wonders if his imminent brother in law has had a similar talk. From Ian’s moony-eyed expression, he kind of doubts it. Fuckin’ Milkovichs.

The bachelor parties are scheduled for a week before the wedding to allow sufficient time for hangovers to clear up, bruises to heal and any other shenanigans to blow over. Mickey had not really known what to expect, and thus gone with his life time habit of not expecting much.

However, now as he is stumbling along the street from where the taxi dropped them off, Mickey realises he’s had a fucking excellent day. Mandy took him and Iggy to a new shooting range with the fancy moving targets and he finally got to try firing a Kriss Vector, something he’s wanted to do for years. After that he and Iggy smoked a whole bunch of pot, out the car window and got Taco Bell drive through, something Ian never lets him do, and then they just started drinking and catching up back at the house.

It’s been years since he spent so much time with his siblings and truth be told Mickey was a little nervous about it but it’s been more than just alright. They shot shit, ate shit, smoked shit and talked shit. It’s been one of the best days he has had in quite a while and the night is only just getting started.

He is already a little wasted. Ian and his posse came to the house for a few drinks before both parties headed off in their separate directions. Mickey likes the Gallagher’s a lot more once he’s had a few drinks and actually had a pretty decent time.

The topper was when Ian had dragged him off to the bedroom before they left for the night. Ian had called it marking his territory in that breathy, deep voice that always gets Mickey going and yanked Mickey’s pants down hard enough to chafe his thighs.

The slightly possessive jealousy that inspired the action pleased Mickey almost more than the actual blowjob. Ian doesn’t normally get jealous ... probably because Mickey doesn’t let anyone else so much as look at him without confrontation but whatever! It was fucking great!

As he lurches from one side of the street to the other, Mickey loops his arms around each of his siblings.

“You guys are fuckin’ awesome, you know that?”

“Oh shit! Mick, you look trashed!”

Mandy laughs with a grimace and stops to try and smooth her brother’s hair a bit

“Yeh, I think I am.”

Mickey’s grin is wide and a little goofy as Iggy peers round to look at him.

“Ha! Little brother, you’re gonna pass out soon if you don’t slow down.”

Iggy hasn’t called Mickey ‘little brother’ for over fifteen years, not since they were kids and Mickey drunkenly grips the back of the thickly muscled neck in his hand, pressing a fierce kiss to Iggy’s cheek.

“You got anything to sober me up a little?”

“Until we get where we’re goin’ all I got is time, bro.”

For some reason, in Iggy’s slow South Side drawl, this little bit of accidental pseudo philosophy cracks Mickey up and he laughs until his legs won’t hold him and he has to sit down on the curb. Mandy is cackling too but Svet, is trying to hold herself together. Throughout their marriage, if Mickey found something funny, Svetlana did her best not to, and he supposes old habits die hard. Mickey glances at his gang of revellers and is about to tell them something about being glad they came out for his party when the laughter jiggles him a bit too much and with a convulsive shudder, he throws up.

The spray of beer, Jack Daniels, and home-brew vodka that Svet made erupts in a surprisingly neat arc straight into the gutter. Mickey looks down at his shirt to check and wipes the back of his hand over his mouth with a shaky laugh

“Shit. That was lucky!”

Svetlana tuts and steps forward, squatting in front of him in her stiletto heeled boots and producing a little packet of wet wipes and a bottle of water from her purse.

“Swill and spit. The you take a mint.”

She rattles a tiny metal tin at him and proceeds to wipe his free hand with a towelette.

“What the fuck, Svet? Why do you even have this shit?”

Mickey surrenders his other hand and accepts the tongue cluck his limp digits earn him as Svetlana cleans him up.

“Because your son is as messy as you are. I always thought it was bad parenting, turns out it is genetic. This is good news for me.”

“Nah, he’s a great kid. Nothin’ bad about him at all.”

Mickey shakes his head with a proud, one sided smile that creates a dimple in is left cheek.

“I’ll remind you of that when you’re sober.”

Svetlana smiles and offers him a hand up.

“Where are we goin’ anyway?”

Mickey asks and Mandy gives him a sly look from beneath heavily mascaraed eyelashes.

“A gay bar.”

“What?”

Mickey’s eyes flare wide and flick toward Iggy, his shoulders tensing involuntarily

“Yep, Mandy picked the place so if it’s not your scene, that’s on her!”

Iggy swigs out of his beer can and offers the rest to Mickey who takes it, still not fully processing what is going on.

“You’re comin’ to an actual gay club? You know you can’t fag bash in those, man.”

“Don’t be retarded, I haven’t done that shit in years. Didn’t feel right what with you being a queer and all.”

Iggy shrugs and grins mischievously at his little brother

“Besides, I looked this shit up online. I’m either a ‘Slim-Bear’ or a ‘cub’ and either way they’re two of the good types of gay to be. I might get laid.”

“Wha...”

Mickey looks around to make sure the others have just heard what he has but before he can question Iggy further, his brother is continuing, warming to his theme

“Ian’s a Jock now. He used to be a Twink but ...”

“Hey! Don’t fuckin’ call him that!”

Mickey snaps, but Svetlana interjects with a shrug

“No it is true, he would have been classed as a Twink before but now, definitely Jock.”

“I don’t … what that fuck are you talkin’ about?”

Mickey sips his beer and rubs a hand over his forehead in confusion.

“Types of Gay men, Mick.”

Mandy smiles, and links her arm through his.

“It’s bullshit really. Kind of like horoscopes of something.”

Mickey chews on his lip and glances at Iggy

“So … like … everyone has one, huh?”

“Pretty much. You wanna know yours?”

“No… Yeah … Okay...”

Mickey pauses in his stride and stands up to his full height, puffing his chest out and lifting his chin as if he is about to pass or fail a crucial life test. Iggy considers with a squinting scowl that earns him a ‘what the fuck’ sneer from his brother.

“You’re a Cub, but a specific type, you’re Discreet Cub”

“No! He’s a Wolf!”

Svetlana shakes her head at Iggy who frowns and tips his head, considering Mickey again

“No … not hairy enough.”

“But he is too aggressive to be a Cub.”

“Well he’s clearly a Power Bottom. They sit more in with Cubs. Mick, you’re bossy in bed, right?”

“Excuse me? What the fuck did you just ...”

Mickey begins but Svetlana waves him off and speaks over him

“Oh, most definitely a PB. But a Cub? No.”

Mickey is doing his best not to act in anyway that might mean he gets bumped to something less than satisfactory but the assessment is taking a bit too long and he can feel his patience slipping.

“Which one’s better?”

He asks irritably and then noticing that he is posing in the street, shakes himself off and keeps walking.

Svet smiles triumphantly and gestures to Mickey’s slightly wide-legged stance

“See! He even walks aggressive. Like cowboy. Like Wolf!”

“Yeah, yeah that is true. Okay, Wolf.”

Iggy nods as Mickey looks to Mandy for confirmation and she nods sagely with a reassuring wink

“You want to be a Wolf, they’re badass.”

Mickey smiles a little and rubs the edge of his nose. The whole conversation was weird as fuck and he’s not entirely sure why he let it happen but it turns out he is the badass kind of Gay dude so that’s something. He glances round at the them all again and grins to himself. Fuckin’ Milkovichs.

#shameless #shameless us #shameless fanfiction #130lb of ukrainian courage #mickey milkovich #ian gallagher #ian x mickey #Ian loves Mickey #Mickey and Mandy #iggy milkovich #mandy milkovich #fan fiction

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