#((in the fact that she is indeed surrounded by love at gracey manor; even if it's not by the people they expected!))

[theheadlessgroom]

@beatingheart-bride

As Doreen and Edward continued to talk with Philippe, the former in particular volleying ideas about how to keep this cover story going (such as lending her "cousin" some of her dresses and helping do her hair, makeup, and overall etiquette) should she have to socialize with the de Clair's again, Susannah remained quiet, pensively chewing on her cream puff, the sugary sweetness suddenly cloying, sickening as she dwelled on what the future held for her:

In some ways...this was sort of a good turn of fortune. It allowed her and Philippe to be together beyond the closed doors of the haberdashery or her house, and that would be refreshing...sure, they couldn't be out in her part of town very much, where people knew who she really was, but with Doreen's help, perhaps she could still enjoy his company beyond just the four walls of her home. Perhaps they could do as other couples did, going for walks in town, having dinner at a restaurant together, going dancing...

But at the same time, Susannah couldn't help but feel her stomach ache, suddenly reminded of her childhood, all the time she spent trying to get others to like her, trying to hide the uglier parts of herself, the parts no one wanted to see, trying to only show the parts others might find palatable at best...and it never working. It didn't matter what she changed about herself, they never liked her. They never cared.

It was never enough.

But she steeled her resolve nonetheless, drawing in a little breath before exhaling in an effort to calm herself: She wouldn't have to keep up this charade forever. Only for a little while-and only for the de Clair's! At heart, she knew, as she surveyed the three faces beside her, that she was loved and supported. This was just a stepping stone in her path, and she would gladly tread along that stone again and again if it meant she and the man she loved could be together.