#((im going to delete myself now by e))

[realnielsbohr]

i hate being stressed about like. things that are actually stressful. normally i could be like "all is well 😌it will be ok no matter what" or whatever but i genuinely cant do that here. if i dont get this sorted out im genuinely fucked

[todayisafridaynight]

#ANYWAY LET ME COOK. im not a good chef but i can at least cook an egg lemme see what i got...

This is leagues ahead of Jo as per Substitute Father so I'm sure you'll do great <3 NOT TO SET THE BAR LOW... Arakawa POV part of that was sooooooo cute but I am of course VERY MUCH LOOKING FORWARD regardless of what you've got in the oven :] I think it's funny we always end up with roughly the same concepts but I just shoehorn RGGJo into it instead

DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN THOUGH WITH HOW THE MARKETING FOR YLAD KEPT HAMMERING IN THE SON THING ONE WAY OR ANOTHER... BUT THE SCENE YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT IS FUNNY and honestly half of the things Westerners [<- counting myself just this once] find funny in RGG apparently aren't intentional so what's one more

Substitute Father haunts me since i really don't like it but i also know that One (1) person really enjoyed it so i don't want to delete it SOOO the most i can do at this point is try to write something better as an apology and try to forget.. and hopefully let arakawa FPOV in a better fic..

BUT YEAH LMAO they really werent subtle bout it in retrospect.... teehee..

[houndsinhades]

2024 in Fanfiction

2023: 0 words

2024: 118,553 words

Acca Larentia | E | Hope Lupin/Lyall Lupin | 16/24 | 111K

My firstborn child. Twenty-ish years of exploring the magical world from a muggle’s eyes, the rise of Voldemort, and what it could have been like to raise the world’s coolest werewolf.

The First Train Home | T | Remus Lupin/Sirius Black | 5K

Three Wolfstar scenes (post-prank, post-Azkaban, post-veil). A good dose of hurt/comfort and a fun little diddy I wrote to try out a new style.

Way to Go, Tiger | G | Scorpius Malfoy & Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter | 2K

Draco takes Scorpius to the zoo for his seventh birthday. Harry keeps an eye on them. Is it Drarry? Is it not Drarry? The world may never know. (Pls. It’s so obviously drarry.)

Thanks for the tag @wolfpants 🩷 you’re the reason I started writing, and one of the best parts of this fandom - and my whole life.

My first year writing! (Okay, technically I started in December 2023, but for the sake of this post let’s give me three weeks of grace time).

I started writing when I was stressed and overwhelmed with grad school, and I was exhausted from the constant work - study - work - study - work cycle. I wanted to do something just for me, to bring myself some joy, even if no one I knew was aware of it and no one online even read it.

It was hard at times, no doubt. I’ve deleted thousands of words (utter shite), had months-long writers block, or (worse) months where I wanted desperately to write, but didn’t have the time or energy to get the words down. I’ve learned some difficult lessons, and got hurt in ways I didn’t see coming.

But even when it was tough, I can honestly say it was worth it to try. I’m so happy I decided to start writing after years of telling myself I wasn’t good enough, or that there were enough stories out there, or asked myself who would even want to read this? To that girl, I say now - it doesn’t matter. It’s okay to be an imperfect writer. It’s okay if there are similar stories already. It’s okay if no one reads what you write. Do it for you, and have fun with it.

I feel like I’ve learned a lot about myself this year. I can slowly but surely see places where I’ve improved in the last few months. I’ve written some things I’m really proud of (and some things that make me cringe). But most importantly, it gave me a much needed creative outlet and a purpose outside of work and school. Writing has also led me to the most amazing community, and that’s been the greatest gift of all. I love the friends I’ve made through this fandom dearly, and if you’re one of them, I hope you know how loved you are.

My goals for 2024 were to just write. And good golly Miss Molly, I did it. Yeehaw! I put those words in the doc and I uploaded them to the archive. Pats on the back for me. Go girl!

In 2025, I want to finish my WIP and start posting my next long fic (similar to Acca, a female POV rare pair). I also want to write more one shots for fun, and explore new pairings and plots (muggle AU maybe? Drarry maybe? One of the dozens of ideas I have locked in a note on my phone?) And I want to leave a comment on every single fanfic I read.

Im glad I took the chance in 2024! And as I wrap up the year I want to say - thank you for being a part of mine 🩷

[endykelopaedia]

I actually deleted it because I realized you hadn't tagged it and I try to pick less fights out the aether like that for the sake of being nice and not hopping on the backs of random people. I did not notice you being Black until you've said so just now. Since you've presumably tagged me for a reason, we can go ahead and discuss the matter.

For context I had said something like:

No trans people have gendered privilege, it's just also racist when you talk about how much society loves Black trans men

Obviously, you are not racist towards Black trans men and I would not call you racist towards Black trans men knowing that you are. I'm also not going to tell you to be angry when White people do this in regards to Black people, although full disclosure I'm not going to stop calling them racist myself.

On the other hand, it's still a lot of other things besides racist to Black men. I could have just as easily referred to any other category of person whose marginalization makes it extra awful to powerjacket them because they happen to use he/him pronouns. Male privilege for trans men simply isn't a thing, just as it isn't for trans women. The idea that one can simply identify into it is weird and people don't bring up their other competing marginalization for nothing.

I dislike when people are dicks to me and then immediately get all polite when I turn out to be a trans woman rather than a trans man like they assumed. That happened just today, ironically. So to be absolutely clear, you and your opinions on transfeminism do still suck, but I made an error deserving of addressing and I apologize for it.

ig im the only one who reads the bio of people they wanna publically disagree with lmao sloppy work & still weird how bad you wanna bring race into this as a whitey. i wouldve ignored u if u didnt do that. but w/e.

still, im "powerjacketing" black trans men by asserting we have male privilege? craaazy stuff. do i rlly have to tell you - a white trans woman - how people can be privileged in some aspects and oppressed in others? (unless you think these privileges/oppressions "cancel out" in which case LMAO)

trans men arent just like, he/him women/females or w/e you wanna call us. we're men. and a lot of us live our lives that way, socially & medically, and absorb & perpetuate society's ideas about gender as a part of our self-conceptualisation. we just men! men who dont have cis privilege (n in my case white privilege) but men none the less! we gotta actually reckon with that n do work to not perpetuate the (trans)misogyny that we're capable of & can benefit from.

& dont worry. im not gonna tiptoe round the fact youre a trans women when i think youre wrong n part of a half-baked & deeply transmisogynistic movement.

[cheddar-baby]

Hey man can you delete the zoophile cat post, its kinda weird and not the troll responce you think of it as.

I walk into a huge respected art gallery ive saved up all my money and im so excited to see a beautiful painting or maybe a glicee print i turn the corner and fall to my knees ripping the hair out of my head eyes red spraying tears because a famous well respected artist just TROLLED me so hard with her ZOOPHILIA PRANK i go home and my kids no longer make eye contact my wife puts her leg out and trips me i try to drink away the pain but the baby has already drank all my pabst this is my life now after the cat photos i kill myself by closing the laz-e-boy recliner on my head

[radiovisual]

are you going to come back?

((I keep telling myself im going to, but im not sure. Im especially unhappy with how this blog was written and how it looks at the moment, bc theres a lot of things id Want to change before getting back into rp here, but I have no energy or motivation to do so 😔 my art block from last year is Still ongoing, im still deeply fixated on other fandoms, and VERY recently I had an epiphany of some kind and haven't been able to stop paying attention to the news, bc anxieties about what's happening in Gaza/the West Bank, Sudan, and Chile, and not to mention this next American presidential election, have me reassessing my priorities in life, ykwim?))

((Im still around technically, i wont be deleting this blog or anything, im just in kind of a tough spot, mentally+emotionally+physically, and that makes it hard to get reinvested in something like this.))

((There's also the factor of... feeling rather restricted in this community. It's not any particular person or group of ppls fault, people are entitled to feel however they want around fictional subjects and themes, but i know that the types of things that i like to write and rp are dark and mature, and this fandom [despite the Nature of the show itself and the topics it covers] tends to attract a lot of very aggressive, very judgemental people -- as im sure youre all aware 😂 i found some friends here, but even still, a lot of the time i know i Can't get into the kind of stuff i ACTUALLY want to write, because most of the ppl in this community would [at least, way back when,] assume that That kind of writing means I'm a bad, dangerous person who wants to engage with those themes in real life 🙃. Which isn't to say anyone is Wrong for avoiding me if darker themes trigger them, by all means PLEASE block me for your sanity if thats what you have to do!! but when most all of those Exact Themes are LITERALLY, graphically present in the show, now, it's like. Idk man whats going on! Why are you here! if sexually abusive relationships bother these fans so much, then Why are they in THIS fandom of all places instead of somewhere tangibly Safer for their sanity, yk???))

(( i don't know. Maybe im just a brat, but ive always felt a little put out by the Hazbin community online. Its extremely self policing and isolating trying to find people i can feel comfortable talk to about my ideas, so ive kind of... given up and moved on, found a nice group of Freaks to be perverted about the Avatar sequel instead lmao))

((So... idk. I guess we'll see. But im very sorry it may have been wishful thinking when i said id come back. I really, truly meant it at the time -- things just changed 💔, both in me And in the community. And maybe theyll change again, idk!but i Do know there's people in this overarching Hazbin Tumblr RP community who don't like me very much (which is Okay), and I don't want to force myself to walk on eggshells anymore -- so I'm won't💪😎))

((I adored my time here while i was active, whuch it why i wont delete it -- i go back to re read threads all the time! -- but unless there's a group of sexual weirdos developing that i could fall in with AND I can find a way to balance this with the rest of my life, im still gonna be on this indefinite hiatus 💀👍 sorry))

((Btw -- Palestinians are in desperate need of e-SIMs to keep in touch with their loved ones and to organize humanitarian aid within the Gaza strip itself -- if any of you have a few spare dollars, please consider getting involved. I know the news is very quiet rn, especially if you're in America like me, but let me make this very clear; We are. kind of sort of Already IN World War Three. Russia and China and the global south are finally starting to hold the west accountable and the west is failing a shitting its pants about it Spectacularly. The world order is literally shifting. There's not one, but SEVERAL major international conflicts brewing right now, as America is sliding into fascism at break neck speed bc Genocide Joe is finally realizing he's probably not going to get re-elected [on account of all the genocide] on TOP of finally seeing the tangible effects of climate change. South America and Australia are on FIRE. Like NEVER before.))

((Never Again is Now. We could be going over the temperature "tipping point" of the planet BY 2030. now is NOT the time to be wallowing in escapism, no matter how much we desperately need/want it. If there is EVER a time to get involved with the real world and to take a step back from the internet and high stress fandom bullshit, it is NOW. No matter what Side of these issues you stand on, EVERYONE needs to be voting, everyone needs to be paying attention.))

(( if you can't afford esims [no shame, i often can't either, money is tight everywhere], then at the very least get This website open in your tabs. It generates revenue with free Daily clicks, the proceeds of which are all sent to UN organizations -- particularly UNRWA, which is VITAL to maintain not only getting aid INTO Gaza, but also retaining Palestinians legal right to return to their land -- without UNRWA, Isreal can begin to LEGALLY, haphazardly "deport" Palestinians, which would take YEARS to reverse through future court proceedings. Do your part, it only takes a few seconds a day 💪🌱))

((Alright, thats all! Sorry if you wanted a short sweet answer, but ive actually been ruminating on all of this, so thank you for this ask, for giving me a chance to talk about it all. Im happy to see this community thriving in the wake of Season 1, even if im not joining in myself -- you all keep up the great work, and keep having fun with it ❤ let it empower you to explore the value of Charlie's message and think of ways to impliment it in your daily life And on the world at large‼))

[figula]

im trying really really hard to be a good partner to ben these past few months w/ this post-wedding depression or whatever (we dk if its even the wedding anymore at this point vc its been like 3 months like. what is the reason) and i think i am doing a good job hon estly but like im finding it so so hard the longer it goes on, the longer it goes on the more i am finding myself having hours-long crying fits bc i dont know what to do or how to fix it or w/e & it's really really stressing me out so much now. these past few weeks ive just felt like garbage most off the time (not helped by this month-long period from HELL) and i was pretty decent at taking the good days as they came + dealing with the bad days when they came for sept/oct but three months into this ride tbh im feeling absolutely fraught and desperate waiting for something to change long-term and. yeah i will probably delete this bc when he wakes up im sure its not going to be a winner to read i just had to get it out somewhere

[raisethe-velvet]

ok so like 2 of my mutuals made posts about their lore so. fuck it here’s lumi lore that no one asked for 

i had a gacha phase when i was like 12, posted it all on a now-deleted instagram account

i used to frequently get into arguments in youtube comments and on discord servers when i was 10-12 and how i wasn’t banned from this one animation memer’s server whom i wont say the name of for simply being annoying as fuck is beyond me 

i work at coles. before that i worked at mcdonalds. i am very nonverbal why did i choose to work in customer service i cant fucking speak

when i was 6 i was genuinely convinced i was the reincarnated fairy princess of another world

i used to roleplay on roblox when i was 10-12 before all the good rp games fucking died 

i was obsessed with collecting dolls as a child and in recent months have fallen back into that 

i played crush crush at the very young age of 12

i played yandere simulator at the even younger age of 11

nightcore phase i never quite grew out of

i have ocs that i never draw and never talk about and wonder why no one asks me about them or talks to me about them

and holy shit do my ocs have l o r e

ive dyed my hair pink 3 times

i also go by the name stardust but no one calls me that so. yeah

i actually have zero connection to the name lumi at all and regret naming myself that but its kinda what everyone knows me as and my url so im just used to it 

i cant think of a better name anyway and stardust is my online only nickname

[crowmatica]

CROWMATICAS DRAG RACE EPISODE 1; TALENT SHOW!

images are just outfits keep in mind

(THE QUEENS BEGIN TO ARRIVE IN THE WERKROOM)

AMANDA CANNON:

Walk this plank, walk all of this plank~ (she giggles)

I'm Amanda cannon, I'm 26 from Boston, Massachusetts. I'm your designated pirate, and I will be going overboard!

WICKED WICCAN:

I cast a spell on you, and now? You're mine. (He smirks)

I'm wicked wiccan I'm 27 from Jersey City, New Jersey.

My style is kinda weird sexy alt boy who may be bad, but makes you wanna be bad with him.

(Amanda gasps) oh wow you're like- tryna fuck, huh?

(he nods) it'd be a pleasure~

(she giggles)

BLOODY MARIE:

bloody marie, bloody marie (she pauses) guess I came early! (She said in a thick French accent)

I'm bloody marie, I'm 32 and originally from France, but now I live in Little Rock, Arkansas. My name is bloody marie because I can't stop looking at myself in the mirror.

MERYL STRIP:

Nevada? I hardly know a' (she said in a fake jersey accent)

I'm meryl strip, 42, from Las Vegas Nevada. I do burlesque, so that's why I went with the name. I'm very show girl, pageant, slutty. You'll see.

VICTORIA LAPSE:

(she shook her boobs and made a sexy face) I'm winning, I'm winning, I'm winning! Oh- I lost it. (She pouts)

I'm Victoria lapse, and I'm your favorite lapse in judgement. I'm a runway girl, and I usually have something extravagant on. I'm 22, and I'm from New York city!

(the others gasped)

MERYL STRIP: that's Victoria lapse, shes like THE it girl.

MAYA KENNEDIE: nothing bad ever happened to the Kennedie's! (With an E)

Hi guys! I'm Maya Kennedie, I'm 29, and I come from the lovely town of Los Angeles, California, my style is pageantry and I've won several titles. These girls don't hold a candle to me.

KITTY GIRL: Meow.

I'm kitty girl, I'm from Maine, and I do drag and stream online, I'm 19, and I am very inspired by Lolita fashion!

VERGA METAMORPHOSIS:

(belt singing) IM ALMOST THERE! ALMOST THERE!

I'm Verga and I...... disapprove of your behavior. I'm a weird girl from Seattle, washington and I do what I call conceptual drag. Others just call it bad! I'm 34, and I think this footage should be deleted.

MIRAGE FANTINA CALHOON:

sorry I didn't notice you there, I was stalking my prey.

I'm Mirage Calhoon, originally from Florida, but I prefer if you pretend walt Disney manufactured me. I'm 30 on the dot. No more, no less.

CROW MATICA:

hello queens, it's me you're host, Crow Matica. Tonight's challenge will be a talent show!

(Victoria does a baton drill)

(Wiccan swallows a sword)

(Maya does a ballet number)

(Mirage does flips)

(Verga does a ribbon dance)

(kitty does a song performance)

(Amanda does knife throwing)

(Meryl does burlesque)

(Marie plays the piano)

Alright.... I've made my decision.

Marie, Amanda, Meryl, and Verga, stay here. Everyone else you're safe. Marie, Verga, You're safe. Amanda and Meryl, you're lypsyncing for the win.

-the duo perform to bark like you want it-

Amanda does great

Meryl does amazing

*CONGRATULATIONS MERYL STRIP YOU'RE THE WINNER OF THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE.*

[albedostartarus]

Ok no this is gonna sound cheesy as hell but. Im unattractive by every conventional way and it bothered me a bit when I was little right which is. Fine. I remember actively putting on more powder on my face when going to school hoping it’d cover up some of the spots and shit(it didn’t I just looked fucking stupid).

In 11-12 grade which was during the pandemic I got a BIT more confident bc of the hair, the long hair helped. But I HATED how I was fat as fuck with the double chin and the horrible skin (which is a consequence of my own actions)

Cut to college and just. Man, I’d worked out a decent bit before college so I’d lost a bit of weight but I wasn’t quite there yet. That combined w my sudden change in schedule, the overwhelming amount of sudden unhealthy food l gained back the weight, I got dark circles, my schedules were all over the place (are) (worse)

It didn’t help that my friends here are like. Z. Mk. They’re like. The Standard. Plus parsons kids IN GENERAL dress rlly well and are well kept. So Yknow. Everytime I go out or am on campus I get that way too familiar feeling of being stared at like everyone’s looking and laughing behind my back I know it sounds cringe asf but man it it’s not fun. And like. On top of that,

I’m just. Not Capable of socialising. I can’t talk to people I can’t make friends like that— I sometimes wish we had a mini pandemic again because the pandemic helped me SO MUCH with finding friends I made more friends in like 6 months of pandemic than I did E V E R and now that they knew I was fun I could hang out w them and they’d not mind the bad social skills much bc they knew me from online.

I wake up and I look in the mirror and like. The reflection PHYSICALLY disgusts me I don’t WANT to look at myself— I actively avoided taking pictures during the niagara trip because I just. I hate pictures of myself— I DELETED my dating profiles because I can’t stand my pictures being out there. It’s SO BAD why do I look like that it’s kit even just skin or whatever it’s just. It’s everything, head, chin, eyes, nose I look like a fucking. I look so bad if I look at myself too long I just, I just get angry and sad.

Dylan was showing me footage of mysekf on camera from when he filmed me for his assignment and I genuinely got a little nauseous 😭 (although this might’ve been because i hadn’t eaten food like. At all)

If I eat the Normal amount of food I feel bad bc I think it’s too much and I feel horrible and fat as fuck and actively avoid having too many calories

I wish.

I wish I didn’t look like this

I might find the whole REDACTED aspect interesting not just because It makes BAGS of money but also because. Man the. The validation sounds like it would be nice to have, strangers on the internet aren’t obligated to be nice to me like friends and family, is there an opinion more honest than that? Funnily enough I’ll probably suck at that too considering how bad I look

Makeup is my last resort if it doesn’t work I’ll just come to terms with being ugly and stupid and try and be good at something else

[rpwbkoala1i]

i know this is guilt trippy but i really dont care right now i am in the er again over this

if you really do mean that you wont talk to me ever ever again, if you mean that i hope you know that will be the reason i get even worse i was only okay last time you cut me off beacuse i had wrestling i feel like i have nothing now i will never get better by you forcing me out of your life and i will continue to obsess over this and harass you and repeat th e same mistakes i did and hurt myself ive already hurt myself so many times over this. if youre fine with that which you obviously are ypure obviously just gonna replace me and not talk to me and be best friwnds with a 14 year old now then okay have a nice life ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

the only thing i even have to comfort me is the fact we sawe eachother and you touching me and shit and its making me wanna kms im not happy abojt anything else

when i go to south carolina i swear i am going to go ask to get my stuff back unless you talk to me by then and actually talk and also delete any fucking pictures of me forever if youregonna be like that then im not.doimg this witjout being upset n@placeholdery @placeholdery @placeholdery @placeholdery @placeholdery

everything you said to me was a lie

[harryfeatgaga]

okay but the furrow in his brows im literally going to suck him off

FKMNJHJINJFBJNFJ MEEEE

Anonymous asked: OH MY GOF HE PROBABLY TOOK A FRONT CAMERA SELFIE AFTER BEING LIKE 😐 accidentally posted that on main story IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF LET ME SEE IT

I CANOTKJNJIKFMNHIJFKO

Anonymous asked: I cannot explain it, but somehow his face, even behind his phone, is the sexiest hes ever looked?! like his jaw and his hair and the way you can see the lines around his eyes since he's pulling a facial expression, DO YOU GET ME

no like iM STILL FERAL

Anonymous asked: His hand is huge. I need you right now to hold your phone like this and notice the distance between your pointer finger and your camera.

IM SHAKING..............

Anonymous asked: when he said he works out to one direction i didn’t think he meant THIS 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I KNOWKJFHJNFHIJK

Anonymous asked: You know how people who go to the gym record themselves doing certain reps to later check their form or whatnot. Harry is a person that goes to the gym. that’s it

REALLLL ONE OF MY CO WORKERS WELL HE JUST LEFT LAST WEEK IS ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE ITS SO CIRNGEEEEE

Anonymous asked: AND HIS LITTLE FROWN MY BOY WAS FO👏CUSED👏 SNAPING THE PIC

IM FUCKIGN OSBESSED WITH HIM

Anonymous asked: HELP FUCKING ME I JUST SAW THE DELETED STORY FUCKING DUCKS I MISS EVERYTHING IM GOING TO D*E

NOOOOOOOO

Anonymous asked: harry said i’ll give you big balls (in the background)

KFJNBHUJINFBHUIJKO

Anonymous asked: WOW. WOW. WOW. DID HE ACTUALLY JUST DO THAT 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

YES HE FUCKIGN DID

Anonymous asked: i’m so 👀🧎🏽‍♀️🤖🧼😵‍💫🫡😭✨🌾🍅📝🦋 right now. ya know?

REALLLLLLLLL

[stevethehairington]

it is such a good thing that i finished my fic earlier today lol

[blackberryjam]

.

[bluejaem]

.

[misha-moose-dean-burger-lover]

i hate the fact that if i give my brain one (1) thing to worry about — it'll automatically fetch me all the pending (and the occasional, previously-assumed-resolved) issues so i can be further anxious, without any inconvenience or lack of material :/