#((asking herself is she's doing enough to help protect the luofu and her loved ones))

[acr3ss-the-cosmos]

What kind of catharsis do you need?

Freedom

You've had the weight of the world on your shoulders, haven't you. It's okay to put the burden down, stretch your legs -- everything won't fall apart if you just take a second to breathe. Go for a late night drive with the windows down and the radio up. Howl at the moon. Break something. You earned it.

Tagged by: @dupliciti ((ty rath!!))

Tagging: @everlastiingiimmortals, @spaced-out-muses, @memovia, and you!

[reginrokkr]

𖧷 @jueying asked: "People watching yet again, Lady Hsi?" The slightest tilt to his voice echoed the amusement held in the minuscule crinkle in the corners of his eyes. The gaze of a high elder was meant to be all seeing, all understanding, and all mysterious to those around them at times - but Jinhsi's gaze could not be more apparent to him. Elegant and beautiful in all her emotions and reactions, he couldn't help noticing how she seemed to linger on various couples in various stages of their relationships. The Luofu remained a comfortable climate throughout the year, but when the air adjusted to a slightly cooler temperature, so began the leisurely outings and walks. Dan Feng himself could not say he was immune to such callings either, having invited the other out for one today.

Tilting his head slightly in wait for an answer to his question, deft fingers gently took one of her hands into his own. Dropping a kiss to the back of her hand seemed to be a gesture she enjoyed and one he liked to see the reaction to, Dan Feng today seeking out more beyond that. Delicately, he turned her hand to face her palm to the skies, pressing a light kiss to the lithe bones of her wrist. "Perhaps something to share?"

[ wrist ] a tender kiss on the inside of the partner's wrist

For all the homogeneity within the Xianzhou society, built as it is from various species, there is an unspoken hierarchy and varying degrees of pride that must be upheld within the same species. For the High Elders of the Vidyadhara race, this stands at its truest. As they are scions of a long gone Aeon that met a tragic end of being encompassed within another that is the first and foremost enemy of the Alliance, their cooperation with Xianzhou inestimable enough to have earned an indomitable reputation that is more a burden to many than a blessing.

Hsī knows all well about this as a human herself educated and instructed to be the prominent figure that High Elders are amongst everyone —is she supposed to be a player in this stage or a pawn?—, and with it comes a yearning perhaps difficult to understand among the Vidyadhara. Even with her upbringing, she can suppress it for as long until it hits like a wave that came unprovoked and uninvited.

Which manifests through silent observations of others' demeanors in public, most of them humans themselves, every time she's out for a stroll alone or in Dan Feng's company. This time, the surge of longing comes as they walk side by side, her arm coiled around his own as they use to whenever they walk long distances— used more for its pragmatism, Hsī was never blind to the proximity and warmth born from a natural closeness they have nurtured for several years.

Deep and calm as the sea the Vidyadhara are tasked to protect as his voice is, the question suffices to make her snap out of her reverie and startle slightly, argent irises peering into the other's teal ones for some moments. The easiest for her would be to deny it, yet she knows that it is abundantly clear that his question is nigh a rhetorical one. Thus her arm falls from his, almost out of shame for even looking into someone else's garden when she should be happy with what she has, a small hum and a dip of her head offered in answer to his question.

Precisely because she has been raised among other Vidyadhara as if she were one herself, she should know that the manners they express love is different than how humans do. And she does— she knew the moment the two of them expressed sentiments that go beyond that of mere friendship for one another, and she was overjoyed at the notion that Dan Feng of all people, knowing his story and having lived great part of it with it, harbored such feelings. The inevitability of a human heart that wants more is, essentially, what makes her feel as if she doesn't deserve this— him.

Moon-touched eyes move immediately to their connected hands now, following their movement up to Dan Feng's lips to press a chaste kiss to the dainty bones of her inner wrist. Different shades of pink dust her pale cheeks for a few moments before the bridge of her nose scrunches a touch when a realization dawns on her. ◜You tease.◞ She counters back, a small pout on her lips as she elbows him gently.

It is precisely that Dan Feng is comfortable at his best within her presence that he allows himself to be this way— an expression of deep trust and love.

Her pout deflates soon as she rests her head on his shoulder, her heart now more at ease albeit slightly troubled still. ◜Have you...◞ She needs a moment to pause and swallow thickly as nervousness settles itself at her gut, but she presses on. ◜Have you ever felt like you want more but you see yourself unable to pursue it? Not because you cannot recognize what it is that you yearn, but because of a matter of circumstances.◞ It only takes a couple of seconds before she shakes her head slightly against his arm, then she raises slightly on her tippy toes to place her lips on his cheek in a chaste kiss before she goes back to her initial position.

◜Please don't mind that question. Just some musings of mine, it's all.◞