#( i didn't have anything specific in mind but!! it might be a fun little cosmic joke if they end up finding wherever cyno is held captive -

[erabundus]

❝  an  appeal  to  common  sense.  ❞  relief  colors  the  wanderer's  tone.  a  touch  artificial  —  for  it  is  truly  just  a  calculated  attempt  to  force  a  bit  of  LEVITY  into  circumstances  that  would  otherwise  be  insufferably  grim.  (  even  by  ren's  standards.  )  ❝  you  got  me  there.  ❞

it's  silent  as  they  walk,  only  their  steady  footsteps  and  the  inconsistent  drip,  drip,  drip  of  liquid  from  some  indecipherable  place  further  in  the  cave.  a  wave  of  pins  and  needles  sweep  over  the  wanderer's  back,  and  he  glances  over  his  shoulder  —  glancing  at  the  ball  of  ELECTRO  that  dances  around  the  general  mahamatra's  fingertips  with  something  akin  to  ENVY.  there  are  times  where  he  still  wishes  the  element  flowed  at  his  beck  and  call  —  though  such  indignant  feelings  are  always  tempered  by  the  knowledge  it  was  never  fully  his  own.  a  strength  bestowed  upon  him  by  his  mother  and  forged  into  a  sharpened  blade  by  the  fatui.  not  a  gift,  but  rather  something  to  make  him  more  USEFUL  to  other  people.  it  comes  as  little  surprise  that  anemo  feels  so  much  easier  to  use  by  comparison.  ❝  is  now  a  bad  time  to  tell  you  i'm  claustrophobic?  ❞  the  wanderer  quips,  turning  back  around.  his  kasa  dissolves,  ring  of  light  behind  his  head  shifting  fluidly  as  their  surroundings  grow  increasingly  cramped.  it's  a  joke  —  mostly.  the  best  ones  always  do  carry  a  grain  of  truth.

❝  you're  not  wrong.  ❞  ren  continues.  the  glow  of  his  catalyst  combined  with  the  markings  scattered  about  his  body  illuminate  the  path  ahead  to  a  degree  —  though  it  still  leaves  much  to  be  desired.  ❝  plant  false  information  on  a  sacrificial  pawn ...  send  us  into  the  lion's  den  and  detonate  the  whole  thing  right  on  top  of  us.  wouldn't  even  be  hard.  ❞  he  clicks  his  tongue.  ❝  they  won't.  ❞   they  won't.  the  CONFIDENCE  on  display  is  jarring,  to  a  degree  that  verges  on  hubristic.  ❝  they  could  dig  me  out  of  the  rubble,  but  you  would  surely  be  crushed ...  and  i  have  a  sneaking  suspicion  he  wouldn't  want  to  waste  such  a  unique  prospective  test  subject.  ❞   it's  not  something  to  take  comfort  in,  but  it  can  be  used  to  their  advantage  —  assuming  he's  correct  and  not  merely  filling  both  of  their  heads  with  arrogant  assumptions.

❝  is  it  just  me,  or  does  this  path  feel  like  it's  going  down?  ❞  he  wrinkles  his  nose;  it's  hard  to  tell.   ❝  what  are  the  chances  it's  below  us?  ❞

"If you can't stomach the idea of sentiment, then consider that RECKLESSNESS on your part would endanger me." Cyno offered a thin-lipped, mirthless smile. He knew Ren well enough by now to understand his intolerance for bloated sympathy. It was hardly ever a problem, given how Cyno held no proclivity to expressing it.

"I should only hope that we won't get to that point." He grimaced, the picture of such an outcome flitted through his mind, unduly messy and far from desirable. "In the grand scheme of things, it'll be unlikely that I'll be able to outlast anything that might incapacitate YOU to such an extent. But... if the intel should prove SOUND, this will prove to be far less eventful."

Unhesitatingly, he followed behind him without further ado. The rock of the cave floor was damp and cool beneath his soles, the heat of the desert and thick forest fading precipitously into a chill that crept BITINGLY along uncovered skin. The air was moist and cloying; earthy, with the faintest hint of brine, infusing the impenetrable darkness of the chasm that gaped before them.

Cyno lifted a hand, bringing to bear a swirling accumulation of electro to light his immediate vicinity. Even so, the light was wan with the encompassing dark, accentuating the rising sensation of CLAUSTROPHOBIA as they ventured further with the walls closing in.

In truth, it bore marked similarity to the descent into any of Deshret's ruins. Perhaps it was the lack of any distinguishable lifeform - mechanical or otherwise - that so conveyed this uniquely foreboding air.

"This would make for a perfectly convenient TRAP. There's barely enough space for us to retaliate as is, and neither of us are particularly familiar with the way these tunnels run."

[void-ink-studios]

Gala of the Gods (Part 1)

A few people suggested some stuff with Scarab and Nightmo, I've become obsessed with some of the art I've seen of these two in fancy clothes, so I'm going to combine the two.

Behold, my attempts at describing fancy clothing!

I am an artist as well, so if there's anything from this fic series you might wanna see me draw, just let me know.

Also, this is multi-parter! So y'all are gonna have to be patient.

Enjoy y'all!

Part 1 -You Are Here- | Part 2 | Part 3

Word Count: 2,200

Mail was not something Scarab expected when he first came to live in the Time Room. He figured anyone with something to say to Prismo would just take it as an excuse to show up and hang out for a while.

But, as with many assumptions he had, Scarab was wrong. Well, kind of.

The mail was never frequent, and it was almost only from the higher ups, but it had happened enough time with nearly missed important updates for Scarab to add checking the Time Room's make-shift mailbox to his routine.

And it was a good thing he did. Because they had mail. Fancy looking mail. And the beetle felt sick to his stomach when he began suspecting what this was about.

"Prismo! Mail! Letter from the Organizer."

Prismo made a rather undignified noise as he snapped awake from where he was dozing off in his hot tub.

"The Organizer? Ooooh, is it that Gala thing?"

"I suspect it might be. It's addressed to both of us, shall I read it?"

"Knock yourself out, Lovebug."

Scarab rolled his eyes a little but smiled regardless. He broke open the seal and unfolded the letter.

"To the Wishmaster and his assistant,

You are both cordially invited to the bicentennial Cosmic Gala. Attendance is compulsory, however you are not required to stay for the duration, should your godly duties require you to return to your posts.

The Gala will be hosted in the Judgement Hall, and will begin 340 time waves from now.

You are expected to be on your best behavior. There will be no physical altercations within the Judgement Hall. Please leave any and all grievances with coworkers at home. Snacks and drinks will be provided.

We look forward to seeing you there.

-The Organizer."

Scarab had suspected for a long time that that last paragraph was pointed at him specifically. It's not like he started fights, it's just gods get aggressive at him for doing his job.

"Oh, I haven't even thought of the Gala... Man, a lot has happened since the last one..."

Scarab clicked in agreement. Then was struck with a sudden thought.

"Wait a moment. How are we meant to attend while in this form?"

Prismo raised an eyebrow. "Have you never seen me attend before?"

"I always left early. I made excuses that my job as Auditor required my attention, so I arrived as it started, stayed for perhaps one Time Wave so my boss could see I showed up, then I left. It's not fun sticking around a party where no one likes you."

Whoops, that came out more bitter than he had meant... It's not like he minded not attending more of the party, parties were never his scene to begin with...

Or, was that another thing he convinced himself he didn't like so it wasn't being taken from him?

Hmmm...

"Well, you can come with me this time. We'll stick by each other's side. I think you'll look nice on my arm, Lovebug."

Scarab's mandibles snapped up.

"O-On your arm... Are you suggesting we attend as... as a couple?"

"I-I mean, if you want..." Prismo looked uncharacteristically flustered, smiling nervously at the beetle.

"I think... I think I would like that, Prismo. But, you still haven't answered my question."

"Oh, yeah, the form thing. Well, how it works is the Organizer gives us authorization to make copies of our corporeal body that we can inhabit. Like ghosts or some deal. They last for a few days, and then we get returned to the wall."

"Our... corporeal bodies..."

"Yeah, it's pretty much the only time I get to exist as 'Old Man Prismo' and not cease to be me. I think it's pretty neat. And you get to be taller than me for once."

Scarab barely responded to that, a far away look on his face.

"Can we... modify these bodies at all...?"

"I mean, you can make them look different colors, I guess, or make yourself look younger but why do you..." Prismo's expression filled with sadness. "...You can't restore limbs, if that's what you're asking. I'm sorry, Scrabby."

Scarab sighed. "It's... fine. It was worth asking."

He made a few clicking chirps as he thought.

"...I suppose I should dress up for once? If I'm attending with you and lingering longer?"

"I mean, you could. I like to, since I don't get the luxury of clothes very often, and I'd rather not show up to a Gala as a naked old man. But it's not like you have to."

Prismo watched Scarab's expression. He was deep in thought, that was obvious with how much his mandibles were twitching. Then, his expression lit up.

"...We can conjure almost anything in the Time Room, yes?"

"I mean, anything not sentient, pretty much."

"Hmm... Would you mind if we arrived separately? I think I'd like to... surprise you. You know the lobby outside the Judgement Hall? Wait for me there. I will meet you there."

Prismo was intrigued, to say the least. "A surprise? Just for me? Well, let's do it then. I'll wait for you."

"Perfect. Thank you, love." Scarab nuzzled his cheek sweetly. Prismo giggled, returning the favor with a soft little kiss.

"I can't wait to see what you come up with, Scrabs. I know you'll look gorgeous."

Scarab's elytra clicked as he purred, smiling softly. He'd been doing that a lot more recently. Prismo decided to take pride in the fact he's made the unflappable Scarab smile and blush like a goof.

The days leading up to the Gala were at the same time quiet and buzzing. Scarab was very clearly cooking something up, as he had carved out a little room in the basement that Prismo was explicitly forbidden from entering.

If you had told the Wishmaster he'd be okay with Scarab, of all gods, having a secret room he's not allowed in in the Time Room, well... well, you'd be given quite the strange look, that's for certain.

"Scrabby! Can you come out of your lair for a moment?"

"For the last time Prismo, it's not a lair, it's a work room!" Regardless of the terminology of whatever was going on in Scarab's little private room, the beetle acquiesced and emerged into the main chamber. "What is it?"

"Our uh... Bodies are here."

It was always just mildly upsetting to Prismo when they just... appeared. It unnerved him to see his own sleeping body at the best of times, but seeing it completely still, not even breathing, was... strange.

"Ah, okay. Is it almost time for the Gala then?"

"We have I think 3 More Time waves before the party officially starts, so we should probably start getting ready now."

"And how long are these good for?"

"Uhhh... I think 50 Time Waves?"

"Why do they stick around so long after the party?"

"I don't know, actually. Maybe they're being nice?"

"I've never known the higher ups for being... Nice. Regardless, how does this work?"

Prismo stretched his arms a bit, examining the two empty shells on the ground. "Don't worry, it's easy. Alright, so all you've gotta do is touch it, and imagine yourself waking up. It's not super nice feeling when you first wake up, just as a warning. Watch."

Prismo slid across the floor, positioning himself completely covering his body, and closed his eyes. He felt himself fade, almost like he was disappearing, but sensation quickly returned as he jumped into his body. He pulled in a gasp of air, everything tingling as his senses caught up with him.

"Prismo? Are you okay?"

"Y-Yeah..." His voice sounded dry. He needed some water. He ran fingers through his long hair and beard as he sat up. "See? Easy."

"Are you certain you're okay?"

"I'm fine. It just... takes a minute for me to adjust. I'm not 3d very often." Prismo laughed it off, but it didn't stop him from holding a hand over a now beating heart and breathing lungs. "Your turn."

Scarab hesitated, looking between his body and Prismo. Slowly, he crawled over, letting himself overlap with the shell. The blue shadow faded, the body shooting up into an upright position, breathing heavily.

"Oh, that felt wretched..." The beetle could only describe it as similar to that falling sensation one has that jars them awake.

Scarab looked as he flexed his own fingers, claws lightly clicking together. It felt... strange to be in a body like this again. His senses buzzed. He felt the weight of his shell for the first time in months. The weight of his mask...

Slowly, he rearranged the mask to tuck behind his head. He would be going to this party as himself. Proudly.

"Heya gorgeous."

Prismo had scooched a bit closer, taking advantage of new senses to hold his love for the first time in a 3d space.

Scarab's breath hitched. He was not prepared for how... warm and soft Prismo's touch would be. He had gotten used to the Wishmaster's touch in their wall forms. But... touch in the third dimension... gentle touch, touch not meant to harm him, it was... new. Alien. His mandibles thrummed as he leaned into the hold, purring, claws experimentally touching the soft, coiling gray hair nearly covering his partner.

Prismo, meanwhile, was fascinated. He explored the texture of Scarab's shell and face. The fine grooves separating the plating reminded him of polished armor. But it was warm, alive, he could feel the beetles muscles moving underneath, the thrum of blood and life. And his pink face, while prickly at the edges, was soft to cradle.

"There you are... That's my pretty Lovebug. Look at you..."

Scarab preened under the touch and praise. He was beautiful. Prismo made him believe it.

"I must say... I think you're quite lovely in this form as well."

Prismo's cheeks flushed a lovely pinkish red color, Scarab chirping in pride. He nuzzled at him, marveling at the feeling of it with a physical body.

"I'm going to go get ready, Prismo. I'll meet you at the Judgement Hall lobby."

"Alright, Scrabs. I'll be looking for you."

The bug purred one more time before sequestering himself in his mystery room once more.

Prismo chuckled as he himself got ready.

Brushing his long, unruly hair was a task in and of itself. He pulled part of the mop into something a bit more elegant, a waterfall of gray tied neatly with a pink and gold ribbon falling down his back.

Prismo wasn't much for formal clothing, but he did like robes. Something soft, light, breathable. And had amassed quite the collection from these Galas in the past. He did like his pinks and golds, but who could blame him? He liked how he looked in them.

The robe had layers of color to it, a light pink similar to his shadow form on the inner most layer, slowly shifting out into a dark, rosy red. There were imagery of gold eyes and hands cascading down the back and sleeves, giving way to constellations and stars on the long skirt that dragged a little on the floor.

He accessorized with bracelet and rings and necklaces and pendants until he glittered like the stars. That was always his favorite part of these events, the accessorizing. He wasn't one to care much about looks, but he did enjoy making himself sparkle.

He looked into a summoned mirror, checking everything from head to toe. His golden orange sash was tied nicely, his sandals looked good, everything was in place. Perfect.

"Scrabby, I'm heading out now! I'll see you there, Lovebug!"

In lieu of a proper response, he heard a loud chirp echoing from down in the basement.

Prismo couldn't help but be curious about what Scarab was doing. All the more reason to be excited, he supposed.

In a rainbow of fragmented light, Prismo deposited himself outside the lobby of the Judgement Hall, other gods already milling about and conversing.

"Prismo! Sho-Hoot man, I always forget how nice you clean up for these events."

The Cosmic Owl flew over to him, dawned in a cloak of gold and silver feathers of starlight. Death also joined him, in a simple, but sharp looking white robe. In the distance, Prismo could spot Life, in a beautiful flower and coral dress, chatting with some other gods.

"Aw, thanks. You two look nice too! It's nice you got to bring Life with you this time, Death."

"We both needed the night out."

"Where's Scarab? He's coming right?"

"Yeah, but he wanted to arrive separately. Said he wanted to surprise me, so I'm indulging. He wouldn't even give me a hint, man."

"Well, consider me intrigued."

The three chatted for a while, Life soon coming to join them, after giving Death a peck on the cheek of course.

"And then the dude just... just tried to pluck one of my feathers out! Like for a good luck charm or something. Do people not get that dreams aren't physical?"

"I don't know, man, people just don't know how to act around you, I guess," Prismo chuckled. He was about to add on, when the doors opened, and a hush fell over the lobby.

Prismo looked toward the entrance, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

"...Sho-Hoot, man."

And in walked Scarab.

[reds-skull]

Hi I’m work anon, sorry it took so long to reply!

Okay here are my questions about Limbo

(You can be as vague or detailed as you like or you can also straight up ignore any of them)

Is Ghost the actual ruler of limbo or is it his Reaper?

If Ghost is/was the ruler does that make Soap one too now or is it Lumanary?

Do you think things could grow in limbo now (grave dirt + light/warmth= little flowers for the moths?)?

What do the other reapers think of Luminary?

Aside from the tear tracks, new fire and fire colour change do Soap and ghost look different know that they share a reaper/what do they look like actually in limbo?

Can price read the limbo denizens minds?

Did soap make the sword of Damocles/can he make more things?

Is there any tidbit or fun little lore bit that you loved but couldn’t fit into the story that you want to share now?

I hope these questions are alright I just really love your AU and I haven’t ever really read anything like your version of limbo before so I’m insanely curious about it (it makes me want to bite something). There’s definitely more questions I’m forgetting but this is getting now so

Have a great day/night and Good Luck with uni!

HAPPY NEW YEAR 🥳

Hi again! (love that your name is work anon now lol)

I'm gonna answer this in a bit of a roundabout way, because I feel like a lot of your questions will be answered if I explain more about Reapers and what makes Limbo so special.

So, in the fic I didn't dive in too deeply into what Reapers are, where they come from, what do they do when they're not meddling with human affairs, etc.

Reapers, as mentioned in the story, are powerful interdimensional beings, with the ability to pull beings into their realms, where they can physically change them. Reapers also have an ability to sense the course of destiny, not always in a clear way, which is why Ghost's Reaper was freaking out at the start. Destiny, by the way, is a pliable thing, and can be changed (as Ghost and Soap did).

Now, Limbo is a very exceptional power among revenants. It's mentioned a few times that the reason Ghost and Soap are so powerful is that they wanted something more than life, they wanted revenge. Therefore, their powers had a different goal than other revenants: Ghost's was to withstand any hostile attack towards him, and Soap's was to protect the people worth protecting.

But Limbo isn't fully just to protect Ghost, is it? It could've been a realm that instantly kills whoever enters it [which it was in earlier version btw], but the victims stay alive, they eventually accept Ghost back and obey his word. Why would that be necessary?

Okay, let's define Limbo. A separate dimension that Ghost can pull any being into, and change it. Like Rudy's Reaper said, Limbo basically works like a Reaper realm.

...Which makes Ghost an interdimensional being.

[This part I thought of just for my own fun, it might change in the future as I haven't written it down until now.]

What if Ghost's Limbo is a Reaper realm? That would make him a sort of very weak Reaper.

What if Limbo's intent was to create a Reaper-in-training?

Cosmically, Soap was supposed to kill Ghost. Both of them have a similar origin, except Soap had a specific revenge. Soap's powers boil down to "able to destroy anything." what about Reaper realms? What if their original fate was for Soap to destroy Limbo, and in extension Ghost, a Reaper to be?

Of course, they changed their fate. Which, by the way, started all the way at chapter 8. If Ghost didn't lose his cool and try to protect Soap, he wouldn't have been able to survive Limbo the second time.

So, when the fic ended, Ghost and Soap were both able to influence Limbo, their Reapers melding together.

Let's go back to your questions:

-Is Ghost the actual ruler of limbo or is it his Reaper?

Ghost. His Reaper can't change Limbo, just like other Reapers can't change its Reaper realm.

-If Ghost is/was the ruler does that make Soap one too now or is it Lumanary?

As the Reaper of Luminary said, they're now revenants of light, its absence and creation. Ghost and Soap share their rule on Limbo, Ghost on the victims (absence) and Soap on the moths (creation). I'm not sure if by Luminary you refer to the Reaper, which like I said can't affect Limbo.

-Do you think things could grow in limbo now (grave dirt + light/warmth= little flowers for the moths?)?

Okay, another tangent lol.

In the deal Reapers strike on a revenant's first death (as seen in the comic I made before the fic), they say "from this day till the day you die you are mine."

It's a concept I haven't expanded on at all, but what happens to a revenant after they die? In short, they're released from the deal, and are no longer under the rule of their Reaper.

As Ghost and Soap are now, alive and under the Reaper of Luminary, they're limited to the powers they were given. So, no, no flowers in Limbo. Yet.

After they die, and released from their Reaper? Suddenly they won't be limited to just those powers.

Sidenote, Limbo as it was acted like purgatory/hell basically. Now that Ghost and Soap rule over it? Could be turned into heaven.

This is the fundamental difference of them as Reapers-in-training. They're basically a classic Reaper now, taking people to the afterlife.

-What do the other reapers think of Luminary?

Before stitching together, the Reaper of the Void (Ghost's) was one of the youngest Reapers out there. That's why it's trying to force Ghost constantly, it's like an overbearing parent with their firstborn child. The Reaper of Destruction (Soap's) was one of the oldest, dating back to the first explosion ever. It was much calmer because of this, it has already seen everything, and had an easier time accepting the new change.

Other Reapers recognized Luminary as a herald of a new age, where humanity can affect Reapers just as they affect them. Whether they reacted well to that or not, I haven't decided yet.

-Aside from the tear tracks, new fire and fire colour change do Soap and ghost look different know that they share a reaper/what do they look like actually in limbo?

Outside of Limbo, beside the changes you listed, they didn't have any other. In Limbo, as you probably know, Ghost's eyes glow white. I imagine if he had his mask off, the tear tracks would as well. Soap's eyes were mentioned to glow as well, but unlike Ghost, the light seems to come from inside him, so his pupils are the only thing that glows.

-Can price read the limbo denizens minds?

If he had the misfortune to enter Limbo, yes, Price could read their minds. Ghost mentions in a very early chapter (3 or 4 I think) that the victims of Limbo have impaired mental capacity, so the experience of reading their mind would be different to that of a normal person.

-Did soap make the sword of Damocles/can he make more things?

As things are currently, he can only use the sword. Ghost's Reaper says Ghost stole light "a sword and a shield". Ghost obviously uses the shield constantly around him throughout the fic, and Soap uses the sword.

-Is there any tidbit or fun little lore bit that you loved but couldn’t fit into the story that you want to share now?

I think I answered that one first actually haha. As a last thing to mention, because Ghost and Soap are what they are, even after they die they would still be together. I didn't think of how Reapers die (if they die), but I'd say Ghost and Soap will have a couple hundred millions years together ahead of them :) [that moment when the cosmic horror turns into cosmic romance]

Thank you for letting me ramble about the magic system in the fic, it's one of my favorite things to figure out, and I always overthink everything so 90% of the details don't end up ever showing up.

And thank you for the good luck, I certainly need it T_T

Have a good day/night, and a Happy New Year!!! <3

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

not sure if these types of questions get on your nerves or anything, but i was wondering what you do to organize and plan your writing. (cosmic specifically). ive been trying to start writing again, life’s just been so much but i wanna start getting back into writing. i was just wondering how you do it? love you 🤍

I don't mind at all, I'm happy to answer in fact!

Short answer: bullet points. This is especially important if you're someone like me who is doing a rewrite where it's following along with the show and working an reader/oc into the series everyone already knows, big convoluted background origin story or not. I bullet point scene by scene, episode by episode with each season. Tedious, I know, but it helps keep my adhd thought on track and organized

💡 The idea:

When I first decided to write my first ever story, cosmic, i wanted to jump right in but I knew it was better for me personally to just sit myself down with this little crumb of an idea and get to know it and the world i wanted to bring it into. This little wisp of an influence I would have loved to have seen in the show and all I did was sit and watch the show while keeping this in mind. I got myself used to the world and the history of the lab and what boundaries our heroes faces when it came to investigating it so I knew what gray areas were free to play in as my little sandbox. And as I watched, the more that watered my idea and allowed me to develop it cause I saw ahead of time what I needed to make it happen (I also just happen to be someone who loves details and fitting them in wherever I can), and it definitely helped to jot down any thoughts that came to mind during the first watch.

📝 The Bullet Points:

The second watch is where I really get into the physical planning of it all. I wouldn't necessarily consider it any more important than the first cause if I didn't have the first (again, maybe this is just how my brain works) I wouldn't have had the opportunity to fully develop my ideas and let myself get inspired as I enjoy the show (that's how I came up with the story in the first place, after all!) But it is where all the "writing" gets done.

All it is is just a bullet point list, episode by episode, scene by scene, of what is going to happen. Probably not super conventional or how "the pros" do it, but again, my brain just might be weird and likes to be thorough. I don't make myself go in detail for stuff I don't need to. Literally, half the bullet points are stuff like

-gov does tests on pumpkin patch. Powell tells hopper about the reported sighting of el.

^that's an actual copy and pasted line from my season 2 bullet points. The stuff where I actually integrate reader (yes, I try and do this wherever I can which is another reason why I am reluctant to update s1 on tumblr cause there's a lot of missing experiment nuggets in non reader scenes) The point is, it can obv be as extensive as you want if you even find that bullet points work for you.

A quick example from my tua fic plans. Sorry I couldn't get anything from cosmic, the app I used for that one didn't allow screenshots, but it is the exact same process.

As you can see, i don't always keep my notes super serious and/or wordy and just have fun with it to keep myself from working myself into a corner 😅 believe me I have a lot of great little nuggets, including literal memes just thrown in there. But overall, that's about it!

🔁 Repeat:

That's pretty much it, and is still the method I use more or less today. Like when season 3 of ST came out, I just sat down to watch it as a fan. But it was also the first time I was watching stranger things while having my series out so it was really fun to watch with a new lense with y/n just riding in the back seat of my mind and popping in here and there. (Again, notes have gotta be ready!) And I plan to do it again with season 4, and it will be the first time I do it with my tua fic being written as s3 releases!

Again, I just want to give a disclaimer that this is just how I go about things cause my unmedicated brain gets tangled and distracted easily so doing this helps me. I've definitely gone through trial and error, as anyone likely has and will but my best advice is not being afraid to try things. When I had the idea to sit down and be thus thorough, I really wasn't super jazzed about it and I certainly didn't dive in all at once because I was afraid of getting bored. But it weirdly helped and felt kinda satisfying?? Cause I went the extra mile ahead of time instead of facing that later if that makes sense? I knew it was something that was gonna bother me later, knowing the lore and getting it 👌just right👌

If you just stick to your gut and get what you feel like you're gonna need, I think things will work out just fine. Sorry if this was super long but I feel like people should know by now that's just me 😂 also, thats the kinda the point I was trying to make! Lol shutting up now. Love you too darling, feel free to stop by anytime <3

💕💕💕 - Yurtle

[rabbitindisguise]

for the record, I also had this problem (am bipolar) and stalled out on hobbies for years. It took a looot of work to realize a lot of personal specific things about my situation (I was punishing myself because I couldn't do other things by not letting myself do the things I could do, even if they were tedious), and I didn't believe that people who had succeeded had ever failed. Those might just be me things! But I'm guessing that maybe (advice, because @deepstatemedia you mentioned wanting some in the post, under the cut):

you've got a hangup on hobbies, because it sounds like it's not a small irreverent thing that isn't bothering you but that- for some reason- being able to have hobbies means something to you about the kind of person you are or other similarly important thing (that's rough, and I totally empathize if that's the case)

you're taking failures really personally and think that perhaps that there is something cosmically wrong with you that doing a hobby is like some sort of Sisyphean task you'll never manage- as I've learned recently, people fuck up, it's just hard to realize it until you move past the fuck up (and it sounds like you've yet to have that sort of success in your life, or are unable to appreciate it). I watched a crochet video where a happy successful woman with a career in crochet confessed to needing to take a break to have a little frustrated cry because it was difficult to understand and she wasn't sure if she could do it, and it blew my mind. I hope you have that kind of lucky moment of realization!

you're making hobbies about you and not, for example, who you do them with. I notice a distinct lack of mentioning the person you were considering taking online classes to help with a thing for while discussing the Problem, so consider that maybe hobbies can be more for the people we do them with to enjoy time together more than a tool to prove yourself to yourself

honestly a big factor into doing hobbies again was the feeling that I was suddenly not responsible for anything anymore, but I still missed the feeling of doing stuff for the fun of it. Since then, I've made more progress in all (*counts*) 7 hobbies I've been doing over the last several months because I was focusing on what made me happy, and doing stuff I enjoyed doing shittily. It sounds to me like you're not willing to do the worst job at these things and have fun. It sounds like fun hasn't been on the table at all. If it's not fun, it's hard to do. And for some people, the grind is worth the payoff. Still, it might be worth trying a free photo editor, a music phone app, or even just making some noises without doing anything with results and not saving files. These exercises helped me figure out what it was like to just be and do hobbies, after years and years fucking off and not doing stuff I, in theory, wanted to be doing. Now hobbies are a source of comfort and familiarity. And I'm still shit at them, but that doesn't matter. When you're so behind on Living Life it's incredible to even try to start, and starting in comparatively a small hurdle compared to throwing yourself at the same wall over and over again like you have.

So: kudos. It was really brave, and I seriously mean that. But if you're looking for permission to rest, you have it. Taking a break is a totally sensible position, in case berating yourself over not doing it is part of the problem. You might end up suddenly realizing you've been doing your hobby for a week without realizing, all because you don't have to do anything. And then, like magic, you don't stop because it's harder to stop than it is to start in the first place. (Though there's always advice for burnout, for when you get good at your hobbies that you have fun doing with no pressure to do them but you're just So Damn Tired, so even if that does happen it's not the end of the world.)

“I don’t have the time to practice seriously so I might as well not practice at all because my progress will be so slow” is a giant crock of shit. Do the thing you’re interested in, do it a tiny bit at a time.

Someday you’re going to be fifty. Someday you’re going to be eighty, maybe. And it’s good to learn brand new skills for the first time as an older adult but if the thing you have the most practice at is saying “I might as well not start because it’s going to take too long to get good” then that’s what you’re going to be good at: not starting things.

If you’re thinking “oh, god, it’ll take me MONTHS to even have a baseline competence at this, I might as well give up at the start” you are looking at your whole life as a bullshit timeline that you have no scale for.

Someday you’re going to be fifty. Someday you’re going to be eighty, maybe. If it takes you ten years to get good at something and you’re in your twenties that seems like an ENORMOUS investment - that’s almost half your life! But if you’re fifty that’s twenty percent of your life. You’ve had the time to get great at and abandon five things that take ten years.

DO THINGS. PLEASE.

I promise, it’s good for you. It’ll make you feel better.

Don’t do it for a job, don’t do it to sell, don’t do it to impress people, do things because you are a very intelligent ape who needs enrichment and your brain is desperately hucking pumpkins into your enclosure to keep you from flinging shit at the walls.