#( at least in my opinion. and like i said. it's probably to maintain the censorship of his language )

[hamilton-one-shots]

How bout a thaurens au in which john starts sleeping with thomas to help alex's career (I've seen a great art by @f-kotik-y ) but then slowly falls in love with him? With prompt 38, 57 and any of sexual ones? Pretty please?

(38: “Isn’t this amazing?” 57: “Is that my shirt?” 177: “You’re so beautiful.”)

John Laurens had one wish. But there was no way it was coming true anytime soon. All he wished was that the guy that he woke up with every morning actually loved him back. He sighed and moved a strand of curly hair from Thomas’ face, enjoying his peaceful expression for a few minutes before getting up and going downstairs to make breakfast. After a few minutes, someone joined him, strong arms wrapping around his waist.

“Good morning, sunshine. You know you don’t have to do that.”

John shrugged. “Yeah, but I want to.”

“Thanks.” He kissed his cheek. “Is that my shirt?”

“Yeah. I can’t exactly wear mine anymore…” Thomas had gotten a little rough.

He chuckled at the memory. “Sorry.”

Now, this wasn’t what most people would first think. This wasn’t a failed marriage or a stale relationship. This was a lot more… Taboo… Than that, to say the least. And it all began because John’s friend, Alexander, had gotten himself in another mess and, once again, John had to be the hero and save his skin.

“Alex? What are you doing home so early?” he asked his best friend and roommate.

“I… Uh… I kind of got fired…”

John groaned and dropped his bag. “Again?! Really, Alex?”

“Hey! It wasn’t my fault this time! Jefferson’s pissed because I said that people who have maids and stuff who don’t pay them support a family are hypocrites who are trying to simulate slavery.”

“… And you thought that was a good idea because?..”

Alexander tutted. “I should be able to say what I think in my writing. This is censorship!”

“Chill out. I���ll talk to him tomorrow morning.”

The next morning, John made his way to the newspaper where Alexander worked and went up to his boss’ office. He hated sharing a name with his father, but it had its perks.

“John. Nice to see you in my office again.” This was far from the first time that Alexander had jeopardize his job.

“Nice to be here again.”

“Maybe we’ll be able to meet up for reasons other than your boyfriend’s stupidity once day.”

“Not my boyfriend, but I agree.”

Thomas raised an eyebrow and smirked. “He’s not? Tell me, then: why is someone of your status always in here begging me to give him his job back?”

John shrugged and crossed his legs, leaning back in his chair. “Because you enjoy paintings of yourself as payment and I have to live with him. He may not be my boyfriend, but he is my best friend.”

“I see.” Thomas nodded and crossed his arms. “Well, I’m getting tired of firing your friend. Paintings just aren’t cutting it for me anymore.”

“I knew this day would come.” John rolled his eyes. “Thanks for the chance.” He glanced up and saw the way Thomas was looking at him. It was probably the same way he was looking back at him at times- with lust and want in his eyes.

“Maybe we can arrange something else…”

“And what exactly do you have in mind?”

“The same thing you do.” John smirked.

Of course, Thomas understood right away. Still, he had a reputation to maintain, making him a bit hesitant. “How do I know this isn’t an attempt at getting some blackmail?”

“Please. My reputation is just as on the line as yours if we do this, not to mention my family name. I have no reason to spill. If we do this, we both win and Alexander keeps his job.”

Thomas seemed to think for a minute. “My only hesitation is the part where Hamilton keeps his job.” John raised an eyebrow and Thomas chuckled. “Kidding.” He scribbled something down on a sheet of paper and slid it to John. “Meet me here at eight tonight.”

John looked at the address and nodded. “Done.”

That night, John did exactly as he said, going over to Thomas’ mansion and being let inside immediately by the Virginian himself.

“It’s nice to see you again, Laurens.”

“Just John is fine.” He stepped inside. “So, where are we going to do this?”

Thomas tutted and wrapped his arm around John’s waist. “Saying it like that makes this sound dirty. At least more so than it is. And my bedroom’s upstairs.” He led the smaller man upstairs.

John imagined that Thomas was going to have a lush bed or something over the top, but he didn’t expect it just to be in the middle of a hallway. Granted, that hallway was in a room, but still. The placement alone made it strange. John didn’t say a word about it, though. He began to strip, pulling his shirt off, but Thomas stopped him. “This isn’t a regular hookup, sugar. Let’s take our time with this.”

That was something that John certainly wasn’t expecting. He assumed that Thomas only wanted sex, not anything passionate. But he wasn’t about to argue. Thomas was an attractive guy and he wanted to enjoy every second of it.

Thomas stepped forward and wrapped his arms around John, leaning down as he pulled him into a kiss. John sighed contently and placed his hands on Thomas’ chest as they kissed, letting him move them back towards the bed as he pleased and only breaking the kiss when they got to it. Thomas started trailing kisses from John’s lips down his neck and pulled his shirt off, putting his hands on John’s hips and smiling. “Just as I imagined… You’re so beautiful…”

John couldn’t help but blush darky at that. Nobody had ever called him beautiful…

(Sex scene below the line. It’ll be italicized and it ends above another line.)

Thomas ran his hands down John’s hips and hooked his fingers in the belt loops in John’s pants, looking up at him for permission.

John nodded and lifted his hips, making it easier for Thomas as he pulled off his pants. He watched as the other moved down the bed to do so, tossing his pants and his shoes aside, just as he had with his shirt, before taking off his own clothes. Somehow, Thomas managed to get even more attractive than before, his abs making for quite a view from where John was laying.

Thomas leaned back down and kissed John again for a few seconds, then pulled away to sit up again, this time reaching for his nightstand and pulling out a condom and a bottle of lube. He slowly pulled down John’s boxers, giving him the chance to protest that he didn’t need. He tossed his boxers down with the rest of their clothes and ate up the sight, committing every curve and every inch of John’s skin to memory. Once he had it down, he poured some of the lube onto his fingers and lifted John’s legs, the other helping him carry his weight as he pushed one of his digits in.

John let out a low moan and let himself relax. It had been a while, too long in his opinion, but he wasn’t a one night stand person. He couldn’t help but wince a bit as he felt the second and third fingers, but the pain quickly subsided both times, pleasure replacing it. By the time that Thomas scissored his fingers in him and stretched him out to prep him, John was in heaven, moaning and writhing in pleasure.

Thomas chuckled. “We haven’t even gotten to the main event yet, sugar.” Still, he enjoyed seeing John react so well when they hadn’t gotten quite that far yet. “I think you’re ready.” Thomas pulled out his fingers and took a moment to put on the condom, John sitting up and watching eagerly. “Be patient, chickadee.” He kissed his forehead and pushed him back down against the bed. “Tell me if it’s too much for you.” He didn’t continue until John nodded. He pulled his legs over his shoulders and positioned himself at John’s entrance before gently pushing in, watching the other’s face for any signs of discomfort. There weren’t any. Just those of pleasure. Thomas smiled and started moving slowly inside of him, eliciting sweet moans and mewls. He didn’t know what he’d been expecting when he agreed to the arrangement, but this was much better. He slowly sped up until he set a good pace, groaning and panting softly at the feeling.

To say that John was in heaven was an understatement. He never felt pleasure like that before and he wanted it to last. At the same time, he wanted to get the most of however long that lasted and, for all he knew, Thomas was the type to finish and assume that John could finish himself off if he hadn’t. So, he started stroking himself and moaning louder, the pleasure unlike anything he’d ever felt before. John’s mind went blank and he forgot about everything else, simply enjoying the time as Thomas gave him the most mind-blowing sex of his life. It was maybe a half hour, but it felt like days before it was finally over. By then, John had orgasmed twice, a sticky mess covering his chest, and Thomas groaned loudly as he finished himself, cursing as he felt himself filling the condom.

“Wow… Isn’t this amazing?” he hummed as he looked down at John’s blissful expression. “You know, if all I have to do to look at this is deal with Hamilton, I’ll consider giving him a promotion.” Thomas chuckled as he pulled out of John. “I’ll be right back.” He kissed John’s forehead and pulled on his boxers before leaving the room for a minute. When he came back, John was already asleep, tired out from the intimate night. Thomas smiled and sat beside him, putting his boxers back on him and cleaning his chest with a warm washcloth before laying down with him and falling asleep.

That was the first night of John’s biggest mistake.

Six months later and John was in way too deep, emotionally speaking. Six months of waking up to Thomas’ arms wrapped around him and beautiful compliments coming from his sweet lips as they shared night after intimate night together led to John falling in love. It wasn’t supposed to be that way… It was supposed to be no strings attached sex to help John’s friend keep his job. He couldn’t just cut things off, not without any explanation. And he couldn’t tell this to Thomas. So, the only solution was for John to keep shoving his feelings down and just enjoy the sex.

But taking this route wasn’t all bad.

After all, John wouldn’t have been nearly as surprised when Thomas asked him out later that morning.

[putris-et-mulier]

People choose sides because it's easier that way. Easier to feel right about what they do and don't cater to on an every day basis. But as my understanding of this site goes most people are here for lip service, both giving and receiving, to justify view points and prejudices. No one is right, most people are wrong, but when favorites get attacked then people turn into white knights without getting all their facts straight. You always try to get all sides and that's why i respect your voice~

~in most matters and am readily educated on anything i may have had some oreconceived notions about. So let this hellsite block you as it burns from the inside out. You're doing just fine with cosmic and this blog as far as im concerned. 

 That was extremely well put… I’ll speak frankly:

I love social media and I love this website because you unintentionally learn so much you didn’t know that you didn’t know. I’ve been through MySpace and LiveJournal and a billion fourms and I’ve always found arguments to be the most enlightening things publicly shared.

You don’t just have to listen to both sides to join or lurk, you actually have to read and pay attention to what each person is saying, even if it’s just to make the most clever clap back. Order really appreciated good clap back.

Maybe it’s the longevity of the site but like you said, people have favorites. There are far less arguments going on around here, actual arguments and not moral accusations. I never misrepresent myself, I mean everything I say but most of the time when I comment on something myself I’m intentionally instigating anger. If people come to call me out that’s great and I’ll participate if people are willing to legitimately argue with me but more often people just tattle to people who they agree with and block me or other people they disagree with so they don’t have to see things they don’t agree with.

That mentality is frightening. It’s dangerous. It leads to things like a Trump presidency.

Worst of all, it’s being encouraged through fake allyship of the disabled through censorship like trigger warnings, through things that are real and matter but are so taken for granted and simplified that they become meaningless or joke. Typing Tr*mp instead of Trump which can be funny but it also reassures people that they are morally superior for agreeing with what they are told to agree with.

Like you said, people have their favorites and a sheep mentality is to be expected but over the years people’s favorites have become favorites of their own, fans of themselves. They don’t tell their followers, “this is why she’s a dumb bitch…” they say, “lol yeah, she’s a dumb bitch.”

I’ve always been good at playing the villain, but I’m becoming more and more frustrated that no one is playing the hero. Very few people go out on a limb to defend their opinions, they just bask in the attention and groups become more and more insular. More marginalized. More segregated. Utilizing and refining more dangerous techniques to maintain the status quo.

The marginalized communities that are harder to defend without changing at least part of your initial conditioning (like disability, bisexuality, asexuality, inter-sexuality, etc) become popularized by outrage, but people are so ignorant about them even if they are convinced to support those communities they know nothing about them and can’t actually support them in any real way as allies. They can do nothing that has any real world effect and seem to not realize that they should.

People re-blog posts that say, “this blog supports XYZ” or “ZYX don’t interact.” That does nothing but validate the people who are woke like a last bed confession; they go to Heaven through mere acceptance and not good deeds. No one is interested in educating themselves, they just want to parrot/re-blog people whose opinions they want to be associated with.

At least before allies received an education even if from an argument or altercation, reaffirming their allyship. Now it’s just a circle jerk.

I don’t believe anyone should be required to educate anyone, that’s not my point. I believe through personal experience that people become educated through participatory allyship, even if only digitally, and through witnessing the reality of what is said and done to marginalized communities they aren’t a part of. Their ideologies are refined by witnessing opposing ideologies facing each other and through the trial and error of joining the argument.

I can’t articulate how much I appreciate people who say they’ve learned a lot through following me, but I also can’t articulate how disappointed I am when people “favorite” me and don’t actually consider the other people’s opinions. Even if I think someone is dangerously wrong, or especially, then, I want people to consider their opinion because if one person has it that means hundreds of thousands of people do, and most probably do through passive ignorance and not an actual intent to be a bigot.

It’s a lazy of me to comment on things with the sole purpose of evoking emotion but so few people actually care about who and what they claim to care about. “I support XYZ” gets billions of notes but people tl;dr things that have real world application. Real information or the questioning of information that makes being an ally more than just a verb.

I obviously care about disability. Disability is objectively and statistically the least supported marginalized community. Our genocide comes first and our civil rights movements come last. Disabled people are actually starting to be recognized as a marginalized community not just online but in politics in academia but as always it’s emerging during the down slide of other people’s invested interest.

In my opinion, we don’t need people protesting Eminem for using the word retard. We need people protesting our murders.

I never intended to be a “popular” blog and I don’t care if I lose 10,000 followers or more over one flippant comment. I’ve dealt with incredible guilt of running a popular blog and not using the platform as I should and that something I really couldn’t live with.

There are a lot of nice disabled bloggers out there to follow. There are options now. I don’t feel like I have to or should keep taking responsibility to introduce disability to people; I feel like I can and should use my talent of being unlikable and infuriating to at least get people to feel things about our issues. If it no longer incites arguments hopefully it at least encourages people to consider the actual words and positions of their favorites as opposed to me.