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drjohndisco · 1 year ago

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Binding Ties (Chapter 07)

Warnings: descriptions of attempted sexual assault.

Ao3 Link || Masterlist

‘So, are all of the Grimms so normal?'

'You should meet my mother. She's been called a lot of things, but normal's not one of 'em.' Nick laughed.

'Does that mean we're related?' Trubel questioned.

'Maybe a few centuries ago. From what I can tell, it's like a recessive gene.'

'Must be a relief to know you're not the only one at least.' Briar said.

Juliette set the dishes down on the table and sat between Briar and Nick.

'So, you see these Wesen things, too?'

'No, I'm not a Grimm.' Juliette replied. 'Briar isn't either.'

'So, how do you deal with this?'

'Deal with what?'

'Being married to someone who can see what we do?'

'Um, we...We're not married. Not yet, at least.'

'Smart. You can get out any time.'

'Hey, here's a clean pair of pants and a shirt for you to sleep in.' Juliete offered, placing them onto the bed sheets.

'I'm fine with what I have.'

'Okay, cool. Well, I'm just gonna leave it there in case you change your mind.'

'We are down the hall if you need anything.' Nick added.

'I won't, but, uh, thanks for the Chinese.'

'No problem. Good night.'

(The Next Day - The Bank)

Briar really didn't want to be here at the office, but they had no choice. Particularly if Adalind had anything to do with it. But, Nick had convinced them to go when they got the email, to keep an eye on their sister.

'Your mother's house went through probate. It was determined at that time that your mother had not filed taxes for the last seven years.' The man said. 'Once legal fees, the IRS and the state were paid, there was a balance of $1,500.42, most of which has gone to pay the storage unit where her personal possessions have been stored as per your request.

It's a good thing you showed up when you did. Rent's only paid through the end of the month.It would've gone up for auction in 60 days. I hope she left something of value for you there. Were you close with your mother?'

There was a pause, as both Adalind and Briar thought about this. But, before Briar could answer the question Adalind replied.

'We were everything to her.'

Yeah, something was most definitely going to go wrong.

(About 3 hours later)

'What did Adalind do to you?' Briar asked, helping Sean up from where he'd been thrown on the floor.

'Threw a vase at my head.' Sean groaned. 'It seems the suspicions we'd both had turned out to be right, she ended up leaving with some of yours and Juliette's clothing.'

Briar wrinkled their nose at this information. 'Gross. You think you'd be able to do anything?'

'No.'

'At least let me give you the address, save you searching through all of those police files of yours.'

Briar then pulled a pen and a pad of paper out of their pocket (the benefits of being a journalist) and wrote the address down. Sean took it from them and pocketed it and left the house.

Damn. They'd forgotten to give him some ice for his head.

(Monroe and Rosalee's House - 3 Hours Later)

'Papa Haydn's all set with the cake, by the way.' Monroe said, placing the plates on the table.

'And you have the playlist for the reception?' Juliette asked.

Yep, that's done. And the place cards are ready. They just need to be picked up.'

'Oh. I'll do that.'

'No, I got it.' Rosalee replied.

'Wow. You're doing all that?' Nick asked.

'Full-service maid of honor.'

'There'd be no wedding without Juliette.'

'Wait a minute, what about the groom? Don't you need me?' Monroe questioned.

'Oh, for certain things.'

'Guys have it easy. All Nick has to do is...is not lose the ring and make a speech.' Briar said.

'What ring? What speech?' Nick joked, then shook his head when they all looked at him quizzically. 'Yeah, yeah, I got the ring.'

'And what about the toast?'

'It's getting there.'

'It better be there by Saturday.' Monroe stated.

'Saturday. This Saturday?' Nick said, laughing. Once again he received stares. 'Nobody gets me.'

'Yeah, no, we get you.' Briar sighed.

'Trubel, come on! We're hungry! We wanna eat!' Rosalee and Monroe called out.

'I'll get her.'

'No, you sit. I've got it.' Juliette said.

'Hey, how's Trubel handling all this, by the way?' Rosalee asked Nick. 'She seems to be handling it well.'

'I'm just glad I didn't find out when I was that young.'

'What about Juliette? How's she handling it?'

'Well, I think most women would have left me by now.'

How much do you actually know about Trubel?

'Not a lot. I've been trying not to push. I just know she's had years of people telling her that she's crazy.'

'Sorry. Was everybody waiting for me?' Trubel questioned, walking back over to the table and sitting down next to Nick.

'We thought we would all eat together.'

'Oh. I gotta get used to this too.'

'You like spaghetti?

'No.' Trubel said, and then paused. 'I love spaghetti.'

'Good. Then let's eat.'

'Can I say something, Trubel?' Monroe asked.

'Uh-huh.'

'I know I don't really know much about you. But I'd like to say that I think you're doing a pretty good job handling this, considering how incredibly difficult this must have been.'

'Well, I really didn't expect to live this long.'

Another uncomfortable silence followed this. Nobody at the table was used to anybody outright admitting their past troubles.

'Do you want more?' Rosalee offered, holding out the plate.

'Sure.'

'You remember the first time you saw a wesen?' Monroe asked.

'Yeah, I remember. It was in one of the foster homes I grew up in.'

'I was 13 when I found out I was a Fuchsbau.'

'You didn't know?'

'You don't really know when you're a kid. Kind of hits you later. But at least we had family to tell us what was going on. You really didn't have anyone to help you through this?'

'Mm-mm.'

'When did you find out?'

'Um...' Trubel began, hesitantly. 'There was this guy that used to fix things around the house. He was always really nice to me, till, uh... One day he asked me to help him in the garage. And he grabbed me. I saw his face change. And, um... he pushed me down on the floor. But I was so scared by what I saw, that I just grabbed, the first thing I could, which was a-a screwdriver. And really all I wanted to do was just push him away from me, but, um...' Trubel explained. Then, seeing the looks that everyone was giving her clarified what she meant. 'He didn't die... Or anything. He just... he didn't get off me really fast, though. And that was the first time I heard anybody say "Grimm." I-I told everybody what I saw. And that was the first time they locked me up. Said I was lying, and then when I said I wasn't, they said I had to be crazy so...Yeah, I got pretty used to being crazy. Until I met all you guys. I realised I wasn't alone.' Trubel then looked over to the pot of spaghetti. ' Can I have that now?'

'Yeah, sorry.' Rosalee replied, laughing.

Then Nick's phone rang and Monroe picked it up from where it had been placed on the table. 'I got it. Hello?' There was a pause as Monroe took in what the caller had said. 'Yeah, can I tell him who's calling?'

Monroe then took the phone away from his ear and turned to Nick.

'He says you won't know him,

but he needs to talk to you.' Nick took the phone from Monroe and continued the conversation.

What followed was a minute of a slow conversation, before Nick clicked the phone off and sat back down.

'What, he didn't want to give you his name?' Juliette asked.

'I get calls like that sometimes. They get cold feet. 'Nick said. 'It's probably nothing.'

Apparently Nick had been wrong, as a few hours later they were all in Nick's lounge sifting through the stuff that Josh's dad had left for Nick to look at.

'I can't find it.' Briar sighed.

'Me neither.' Hank said.

'If there's a key in here, I have no idea where it is.' Juliette said, shaking the suitcase the items had come in. 'But speaking of lost things, have you seen my grandmother's vase?'

'I think that was broken when Adalind hit Sean over the head with it.' Briar mumbled.

'What?' Juliette gasped.

'I'll explain it later.' Briar promised.

'Nick, there is stuff in here I have never seen in any of your books.' Rosalee exclaimed. 'You ever heard of an "Abartige Aasfresser"?' She then turned the book around to show Nick an illustration of someone with a unicorn horn in their head.

'Not until now.'

'You really see this stuff?' Josh asked.

'I haven't seen this one yet.' Nick replied.

'But it's all true?'

'Some people have kind of a monster within. And Nick can see them, Trubel can see them, and your dad could see them.' Juliette explained.

'Josh, just 'cause you can't see them now, doesn't mean you won't some day. Hit me pretty late, too.' Nick added.

'Well, at least I'll know it's real. Sort of.'

'I can't find this key.' Nick complained. 'Have you ever seen it?'

'No. All I know is he was really worried about it. Wanted to get it to someone who would understand.'

'So where else could it be?' Hank said.

'I don't know. I don't even know what we're looking for.'

'Well, he didn't drive all the way here without it,' Juliette said, shaking a small bag. 'So it has to be here somewhere.'

'When he told you about it, he was trying to get out of bed, like he was gonna show you where it was.' Trubel suggested.

'It wouldn't be in that hospital room. He never got out of bed.'

'Maybe he wasn't trying to get up.'

'He was asking for his cane.' Hank added.

'Yeah.'

'He's had this forever.' Josh said, lifting it up. 'He got it from his dad, who got it from his dad.'

Nick took it from Josh, and shook it. Then the end popped off and Nick looked at, stunned.

'Did I break it?'

'I don't think so.' Hank said. 'Can I see?'

Hank then inspected the top part of the cane, before placing into a small notch in the side and pulling out a nail. Hank handed Nick the key, once he'd tipped the cane.

'Is that a key?'

'It is now.'

(The Spice Shop)

Nick placed the net key in the ink and then transferred it over to the paper with the other key indentations.

Nick, remember that map I showed you at my house last year? Monroe questioned.

'Yeah, the one that your great-great uncle drew.

'It was actually great-great-great grandfather on my mother's side. But the point is... we are definitely talking Black Forest.'

'Germany.' Trubel mused.

'Yeah, it all seems to go back to Germany.' Juliette said.

'Well, we're one key closer to... God knows what.' Monroe stated.

'I wonder if we'll ever know.' Briar mumbled.

'I don't think I want to know.' Josh said. Well, at least I know my dad wasn't crazy. Unless all of you are.'

(Unknown Time - Nick's house)

'You know what?' Briar asked, looking up from their work at the computer.

'What?' Nick said, from the doorway. He'd gotten in late, once again.

'I've never realised how odd we must look to everyday people. Like, even as a person who could be classed as a 'beast' it's never really clicked until now. Does that make sense?'

'Yes, it does.' Nick replied. 'It was most certainly an odd adjustment when I was first learning the ropes. Had quite a few missteps, but I think I've told you about those. People thought I was crazy, hell, even Hank did for almost a full year!'

'Oh, I would have been insufferable had I known you back then.'

'You're not being insufferable right now?' Nick teased.

'Shut up!' Briar replied, playfully. 'Besides it's not like the way I met you was any better -- being brought to justify where you were because your mother murdered mine is not fun.'

Nick walked over to them and placed his arms around their shoulders. 'Come on, let's go to bed. Stop worrying about the past -- the future will be better.'

(If only he'd known how wrong he was.)

#oc x canon #my writing*#universe: binding ties (gri.mm au)#[ot3] blood leads me back to you

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starsrshiney · 2 years ago

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So giving me a link to an incorrect quotes generator with an 'any' amount option for characters is probably a bad idea.

Incorrect Quotes

Chax: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Takky will and will not eat. Aaron: Grass? Yes! Chax: Moss? Yes!! Aaron: Leaves? Ohh, yes! Chax: Shoelaces? Strange but true! Aaron: Worms? Sometimes! Chax: Rocks? Usually nah. Aaron: Twigs? Usually! Chax: Mahn's cooking? Inconclusive! Rose: How did you… test this? Chax: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it. Rose: ... I don’t know how to feel about this. Mahn: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

Anniey: I’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so I can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.

Stars: Rose, you need to react when people cry! Rose: I did. I rolled my eyes.

Mahn: *about Rose and Chax* They make a cute couple, huh? Von: They certainly are standing next to each other.

Jasmine: Rose, we're hungry! Anniey: Rose! What's for dinner? Sal: We're hungry, Rose! Rose, frying a bottle of ketchup over the stove: *screams*

Briar: What's this? Aaron, hugging Briar: Affection! Briar: Disgusting. Briar: ...Do it again.

Stars: God, I love Von. Anniey: Yeah, you fucking better.

Jasmine, to Sal: If you see Anniey, give them this message *makes a neutral face* Jasmine: They'll know what it means. *later* Sal: oh, and Jasmine said to give you a message. Sal: *makes a neutral face* Anniey: Oh no. The neutral face of displeasure.

Rose: Where are you going? Crystal: To either get ice cream or commit a felony. I'll decide on the way.

Sal: Briar's first detention, I'm so proud. Chax: Whoa, back up. Why did they get detention? Aaron: Because they're an idiot. Anniey, terrified: They can do that??

Rose: Hey, Jimi, are you free on Friday? Like around eight? Jimi: Yeah. Rose: And you, Anniey? Anniey: Umm... yes? Rose: Great! Because I'm not. You two go out without me. Enjoy your date! Anniey: Did they just-

Aaron: So uh, for this party and everything, do you, uh... Takky, sighing: You don't know how to dress for this, do you? Aaron, panicked: WHAT IS CLOTHES???

Stars: I intend to stay pissed at you forever. Stars: Even if I seem helpful. Jasmine: Then you're in luck. Jasmine: Because you don't.

Jasmine: *in a jail cell* What about my Miranda rights!? You’re supposed to say I have ‘the right to remain silent’”! NOBODY SAID I HAD THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT! Crystal: *in the cell next to them* You have the right to remain silent, what you lack is the capacity.

Chax: We both look very handsome tonight. Jimi: You know, if you'd just said that I looked handsome, I would have said, "So do you." Chax: I couldn't take that chance.

Stars: Takky has discovered "deez nuts" jokes and it's all they say now. Everything is deez nuts. They simply can't stop. Stars: I asked Takky where they learned that joke. They made me promise they wouldn't get in trouble if they told me. I agreed. Stars: So they lean in and whisper, "deez nuts."

Jimi: You treat an outside wound with rubbing alcohol. You treat an inside wound with drinking alcohol.

Aaron: This is horrible! This is the most humiliating thing to ever happen to me! Rose: Oh-? Even more humiliating than- Aaron: We are not doing this!

Jimi: What is this!? Crystal: That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away, my friend. Jimi: Ow! Make it stop! Crystal: Surrender to your kindness, Jimi. It’s nice to be nice. Jimi: Your guilt is strong, my friend. But it is no match for the power of my selfishness!

Rose, knocking on the door: Aaron, open up! Aaron: It all started when I was a kid. Rose: That’s not what I- Chax: Let them finish!

Jimi: Ah shit, I forgot. Crystal: Forgot what? Jimi: How do you expect me to answer that?

Chax: So, according to my university, it is, quote, “my responsibility if there is an internet outage to contact the faculty and the department.” Chax: Now, if you’re a critical thinker like me, you might be wondering one thing. Chax: HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO EMAIL THE DEPARTMENT?!?!?!

Rose to Aaron: Me? I'm the bee knees, but, you? You're just... Jimi: Cockroach ankles! Rose: Ye- uh, what?

Jimi: How would you like your pancakes? Jasmine: Plain. Chax: With sprinkles! Takky: Chocolate chips. Anniey: Potatoes. *Jasmine, Chax, and Takky look at Anniey* Anniey: What? They're good.

Anniey, washing the dishes: Who the fuck used this pan?? Anniey: Wait. I the fuck used this pan… Takky: It was you the fuck. Anniey: It was I the fuck… Stars: Who cooks rice in a pan? Takky: They the fuck.

Jimi: If I stay in bed I'll be warm. If I get in the shower, I'll also be warm. But the distance between the bed and shower? No. That is not warm.

Stars: I’ve never smoked marijuana. I ate a brownie once at a party. It was intense. It was kind of indescribable. I felt like I was floating. Turns out there was no pot in the brownie. It was just an insanely good brownie.

Chax: Talk dirty to me, baby~ Takky: The dishes. Chax: Wh- Takky: They’ve been there for 4 days and it’s your turn to wash them. You still haven’t cleaned them and I have asked you to do so several times.

Mahn: Hey, Jasmine. Why did the chicken cross the road? Jasmine: To get to the other side? Mahn: You were supposed to say “I dunno, why?“ Jasmine: Uh... fine. I don’t know. Why did it cross the road? Mahn: To get to the idiot’s house. Jasmine: ...Ok? Sal: Hey, Jasmine. Knock knock. Jasmine: No. Sal: You were supposed to say “who’s there?” Jasmine: Fine... let’s get this over with. Who’s there? Sal: The chicken. Jasmine: Sal: Mahn: Jasmine: Listen here you little shits-

Von: Are you an ‘arr’ pirate or a ‘yo ho ho’ pirate? Jasmine: I’m a ‘I’m not paying $600 for photoshop’ pirate.

Aaron: What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done? Anniey: *sighs* Anniey: I killed a man.

Aaron, talking about Jimi: Is this a friend of yours, Stars? Stars: Kind of? Not really. They're in my life and there's nothing I can do about it.

Jimi: Briar said its my turn with the brain cell. Aaron: Square up.

Crystal: And what do I get out of this? Sal: I will give you a dollar. Crystal: What do you think I am? A chump? I would never do it for a dollar! Sal: How bout two dollars? Crystal: You got yourself a deal.

Von: You look mentally ill. Sal: I am. Let’s go.

Aaron: What’s wrong? You look 10 seconds away from ripping someone’s throat out. Chax: Fucking Briar and Takky were trying to invoke one of the minor gods again last night. I didn't get an ounce of sleep, thanks to their bloody chanting.

Von: You know I think my life has value. Stars: Who are you and what have you done with Von?!

Anniey: I just wanted to say that over the years, I have come to regard you as… people I met.

Anniey: Want to hear a hard riddle? Sal: Sure. Anniey: A rooster laid an egg on a roof. Which way did it roll? Sal: ...down? Anniey: N- Chax: Who cares about which way it rolled, it would be scrambled eggs by then. Anniey: Anniey: No, it's that roosters don't lay eggs... Jesus Christ...

Crystal: We’re kind of missing something guys. Jimi: Cohesion? Aaron: Teamwork? Jasmine: A general sense of what we’re doing? Von: And Briar is not here. Jimi: Oh, and that, yeah.

Takky: Is Anniey always like this when they lose? Chax: Oh, yes. You should've been there for the Great Jenga Tantrum of 2015. Anniey: You bumped that table and you know it!

Chax: As your best friend— Mahn: Von is my best friend. Chax, holding a knife: As your best friend—

Jasmine: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat? Briar: >:O language Stars: Yeah watch your fucking language Sal: Okay, who taught Stars the fuck word?! Mahn: 'The fuck word'. Rose: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time Stars: Oh my god they censored it Mahn: Say fuck, Rose. Stars: Do it, Rose. Say fuck.

Jasmine: The only thing keeping me from running away and hiding from society for the rest of my life is spite. I could disappear forever, but there are some bitches whose downfalls I have yet to witness, and I wanna be around when that happens.

Stars, to Mahn: If you see Sal, give them this message *makes a neutral face* Stars: They'll know what it means. *later* Mahn: oh, and Stars said to give you a message. Mahn: *makes a neutral face* Sal: Oh no. The neutral face of displeasure.

Stars, looking over Takky’s shoulder: You can draw? Takky, stopping what they were doing: You can speak?

Takky: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case? Von: wHat? Takky: I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved. Von: Can we go back to the part when you said "when I get murdered"?

Crystal: So... what would you do if you were in bed with me? Rose: Depends. Is your bed comfortable? Crystal: Yes. Rose: I'd sleep.

Rose: Is the pink panther a lion? Mahn: Say that again but slower. Rose: I don’t get it. Mahn: He’s a PANTHER. Rose: Is that a type of lion? Mahn: No, it’s a fucking panther. Rose: *googles panther* They aren’t pink? Mahn: AND LIONS ARE?!

Von: Hey I just got a pet snake. What should I name him? Aaron: A pet WHAT?! Stars: William Snakespeare.

Chax: Do we have any orange juice left? Jasmine: *pours the remaining juice into their cup* Jasmine: Sorry, we’re all out.

Von, smugly, after security arrives to escort Crystal and Chax out: So, do you wanna walk out of here or do you wanna be carried out? Crystal, in defeat: Let’s go. Chax: Wait. Crystal: What? Chax: I’d kinda like to be carried out...

Chax: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves? Jasmine: Milfs. Anniey: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves. Chax: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for??? Jimi: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties. Jimi: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago. Anniey: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck. Chax: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK— Chax: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY! Jimi: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries? Jasmine: What? No! It isn't! Jimi: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME! Anniey: Jimi... Jimi: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION! Anniey: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you. Jimi: CHAX, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION! Chax: The word milf has been ruined for me. Jasmine: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS! Anniey: Y'all are dumbasses.

Rose: Is the pink panther a lion? Jasmine: Say that again but slower. Rose: I don’t get it. Jasmine: He’s a PANTHER. Rose: Is that a type of lion? Jasmine: No, it’s a fucking panther. Rose: *googles panther* They aren’t pink? Jasmine: AND LIONS ARE?!

Anniey: So don't panic but one of us is possessed by an owl.... Jimi: .... Jasmine: ..... Aaron: ...... Sal: ..Who? Anniey: That's the thing we don't- *Everyone stares at Sal*

Rose: Words ending in 'ie' just sound so adorable. Like cutie, sweetie, cookie- Chax: Eyy, homie! Mahn: But then there's cootie... Anniey: Die.

Briar: Ducks are better than rabbits. Jimi: What? Rabbits are adorable. Have you ever been in a fight with a duck? Ducks are jerks. Mahn: Duck is delicious! Rabbit is all gamey. Jimi: We’re not talking about flavour, Mahn! Mahn: Flavour counts! Jimi: Who carries around a duck’s foot for good luck? Anyone? Takky: You wrap yourself in a comforter stuffed with rabbit hair. I’ll wrap myself in a comforter stuffed with duck feathers! Who’s cozier? Jimi: Okay, but- Takky: NO, NO, NO, NO. WHO’S COZIER? Mahn: Then why don’t we take a rabbit, a duck, stick ‘em in a cardboard box and let them fight it out! Jimi: BECAUSE IT’S ILLEGAL, MAHN! Mahn: ONLY IF WE BET ON IT, JIMI! Briar: I- Jesus-

Jasmine: Alcohol is delicious! ...I mean, MAlicious. Sorry guys, I’m really drunk right now.

Rose: Where is Von? Stars: I'll do you one better, who is Von?? Anniey: Here's a better question, why is Von?

Chax: I see the red flags, I acknowledge that they're there, and then I completely ignore them.

Mahn: I’m proud to say I’ve come over my fear of ghosts! Takky: Eyy, that’s the spirit! Mahn: *gasps* whErE???!!!??

Crystal: Von is playing hard to get. Crystal: Little do they know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.

Takky: My life isn't as glamourous as my wanted poster makes it look.

Anniey: sapnu puaS. Mahn: What?? Jasmine: What language is that. Anniey: Turn your phone 180 degrees. *Anniey was removed from the groupchat*

Takky: I can do anything I put my mind to. I once figured out Jimi's phone number just by choosing random numbers.

Jimi: Hi, who's this? Briar changed all of my contacts to mythical creatures. Rose: What's mine? Jimi: Dwarf. Rose: THEY'RE SO MEAN, I'M NOT THAT SHORT! Jimi: Oh, hey Rose. Rose: FUCK!

Jimi: Do you know that we are made out of atoms? Jimi: And atoms never touch each other. Jimi: So in my defense, officer. I did not punch this kid.

Jimi: Don’t weep for the stupid. You’ll be crying all day.

Anniey: *cocks gun* Go to Bed. This is no longer a request, This is now a Threat.

Crystal: I will send my army to attack! Crystal: *releases a dumpster of raccoons*

Anniey: Are you having another depressive episode? Aaron: A depressive episode? Aaron: I'm having a depressive series and we're just on season one.

Sal: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out! Aaron: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way? Sal: I don't know, surprise me!

Jimi: Stars isn’t answering my messages. Briar: Allow me. Jimi: I tried 6 times, what makes you thi- Stars: *replying to message* Hello.

Takky: I think it's time to start fucking some shit up. Rose: Oh no. Takky: More like "oh yes!"

Mahn: Do you know the ABCs of first aid? Chax: A. Bone. Coming out of the skin is very bad.

Briar: Why is Von crying on the floor? Aaron: They took one of those 'what person are you?' quizzes. Briar: And? Aaron: They got Anniey.

Sal: *standing on a balcony and sneezes* Anniey: *standing on the roof* Bless you. Sal: God?!

Rose: I think I mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart.

Sal: Be careful about succumbing to these sorts of destructive... urges. Addiction can be a powerful thing. Jimi: So am I. Bow down before your new supreme overlord, bitches.

Briar: I don’t mean to be rude— Crystal: Yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often.

Briar: Wasn't icarly that guy that girlbossed too close to the sun because he was down for Apollo? Jasmine: ICARUS?

Anniey: Look, last night was a mistake. Takky: A sexy mistake. Anniey: No, just a regular mistake.

Anniey: Crystal, you're testifying in an aggravated assault case tomorrow, and the D.A. is worried about how you'll present yourself on the stand. Crystal: Why? I'm fine on the stand! *flashback to Testimony #1* Crystal: Look, I'll make this real simple so even these dumdums can understand. Crystal, to the jury: MAN DID CRIME. *flashback to Testimony #2* Crystal: I'm sorry, could you make her stop doing that weird thing with her face? Defense Attorney, next to the crying defendant: ...Crying? *flashback to Testimony #3* Crystal: And when this is over, I'm gonna find you and I'm gonna break those little fingers. Judge: Could the witness please stop threatening the stenographer?

Takky: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier. Takky: Violently practices. Jasmine: Violently studies. Crystal: Violently sleeps. Stars: Violently shoots pictures. Von: Violently boxes. Aaron: Violently murders people. Crystal: Violently worries about the previous statement.

Anniey: So, what, now I'm just supposed to do anything Stars does? I mean, what if they jumped off a cliff? Jimi: If Stars were to jump off a cliff, they would've done their due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Stars jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff. Chax: You jump off a cliff! Jimi: Gladly, provided Stars did first.

Jimi: Let’s write Crystal a friendly note, shall we? Dear... Incompetent... Dumbass...

Takky: Hey, Jimi. What kind of flowers do you prefer? Jimi: I like sunflowers. Takky, pulling out a bouquet of Venus Flytraps: Well, shit-

Stars, tearing up the room: Where are they? Stars, looking under a pillow: Who moved them? Who moved my children? Stars: Somebody moved my M&M's, and now I am going to start killing.

Jimi: Next time I'm at the pet store, I'm gonna take a hamster and drop it in the scorpion cage. I wanna see what a hamster's face looks like when it goes, "oh, fuck."

Jasmine: I can never give Takky shit because I’m jealous of them. They look at their life and say, “Sweet! This is perfect!” Jasmine: I look at my life and say, “Welp. Time to get drunk.”

Jimi: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life. Von: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back... Aaron: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this. Jasmine: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years. Mahn: I knew I lost that potential somewhere. Anniey: Mental stability, my old friend! Jimi: Jesus, could you guys lighten up a little?

Jasmine: You really believe in Takky? Anniey: Luckily, they believe in themself enough for the both of us.

*Rose dies in a game with ships* Crystal: This ship is no longer a ship of love, it's a ship of vengeance, a gavel of justice against all that is wrong in the world, showing no mercy, as no mercy was shown to us. Crystal: The spark of love will now fuel the fires of destructive glory as I wage my war across the world with righteous fury. Von: Legend has it that Rose still haunts the ship, stealing my fucking drinks. Rose: Of course I do.

Takky: Go big or go home! Rose: Please, for once in your life just go home. I'm begging you. Go. Home. Takky: I'm going big!

Jimi: What time is it? Chax: I don’t know, pass me that saxaphone and we’ll find out Chax: *BLASTS the saxaphone* Rose: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXAPHONE AT TWO IN THE FUCKING MORNING Chax: It’s 2 am

Anniey: *finds a note* Hmm, whats this? Von: Hey, that's mine! *tries to grab it* Anniey: Aww, it's a love note for Jimi? Von: No- Anniey: *opens it* Anniey: Von: Anniey: I can't read this.

Anniey: Stars, gather the others. We need to have another Takky-is-doing-something-stupid-again-and-we-have-to-stop-them-before-they-hurt-someone convention.

Anniey: Good morning. Rose: Good morning. Mahn: Good morning. Briar: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. Jimi: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!

*In a horror movie situation* Anniey: I've got no service in my phone here. Mahn: Shoot, my battery just died. Crystal: Sorry guys, I just broke my phone with a hammer. Aaron: Guys, my phone is a book.

Anniey: Guys… the principal just called— Rose: It was Jimi! Jimi: It was Briar! Briar: It was Chax! Chax: It was me!

Anniey: You're violent. Von: Yeah but I'm also short and that's adorable.

Takky: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

Anniey: Dammit, you ruin everything! Chax: You're welcome.

Jimi: Small creatures are much more vicious because they have a smaller body to bottle up all their emotions. Jasmine: Ridiculous. Give me some examples. Takky: Wasps? Anniey: Terriers? Jimi: Anniey.

Aaron: ...This is one of those moments where it doesn't really matter what I have to say, isn't it?

Takky: So I got this amazing plan! Mahn: We fail almost every time you say that. Takky: Well this is the same! But with a hamster involved.

Chax: I have one foot in the grave but in a kind of fun flirty way, the way one might slip on a fishnet stocking.

Von: How long do you think it'll take? Stars: I don’t know, three or four. Von: Three or four what? Days? Weeks? Months? Stars: Yeah, maybe five. Von: Five what?!

Stars: *eating a cinnamon roll* Jasmine: Cannibalism. Stars: *confused chewing noises*

Anniey: A butterfly! Hey, little guy, gal or nonbinary pal! Briar: Can a butterfly be nonbinary? Anniey: I mean, maybe? I don't judge. Jasmine, staring dreamily out of the window: Ah, have you ever imagine having butterfly wings? Then- Stars: Then it would be inconvenient as fuck. Your wings would smack every doorframe and your clothes would have to have holes in the back. Mahn: Also, your wing's paper thin, so even a six year old aimed a NERF gun at it would... Yeah... Sal: *sips coffee* According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a- Jasmine: No, nononono. You fuckers have already shattered my dream, you don't get the fucking privilege to make that reference. Briar: Also, it's about a butterfly, not a bee... Why would you make that reference? Anniey: You clearly have not lived with them long enough.

Sal: I can't imagine what Chax is planning. But I can tell you two things. We won't like it and it won't be legal.

Anniey: Any tips on how to make someone like me? Sal: Try to make them laugh all the time. Anniey: Oh, wow! You actually help me for once, and it's even good advice! Sal: Yeah, the more they laugh, the more time they spend with their eyes closed, so it'd be easier.

Takky: *pitches an idea* Stars, impressed: Huh, there might be something here! Mahn, under their breath: Yeah, a lawsuit.

Rose: Ha! Don't you know the trappers trap can trap the trapper? Rose: I must be losing it, I'm quoting Chax.

Stars: :) Jimi: >:( Stars: Turn that frown upside down! Jimi: ):< Stars: Not sure what I was expecting...

Briar: Someone’s trying to break in. Call the cops! Chax: *loads shotgun* I got this. Briar: Last week you fell up the stairs, what do you mean-

Mahn: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT! Aaron: At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone. Mahn: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch? Aaron: Somehow that's worse.

Jimi, dramatically: They called me a fool. Chax, sick of Jimi's shit: They weren’t wrong.

Jimi: That's greatly offensive to my people. Stars: College dropouts?

Stars: I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan. Briar: We could attack them with hummus. Stars: I stand corrected. Briar: Just keeping things in perspective.

Crystal: Why do I always try to tell people we're cool? We are so very uncool.

Rose: Why don’t you go talk to them? Stars, sarcastically: Oh. Yeah, sure. Rose: What? So you go tell them they’re cute, what’s the worst that could happen? Stars: They could hear me.

Jimi: Ah shit, I forgot. Mahn: Forgot what? Jimi: How do you expect me to answer that?

Von, texting Chax: Hey do you like anyone? Chax: Yeah you Von: Oh, I'm sorry we're just friends Chax: *Yeah, you? Chax: Oh haha sorry lol Von: *dies inside*

Von: I have to say, I'm a little embarrassed for you. Takky: This is a sports-related injury. It makes me look cool! Von: Tripping over a basketball on your way to the bathroom is not cool!

Anniey: Chax, what are you doing? Chax: *shaking a cat shaped piggy bank* I’m just trying to figure out how much change I have inside. Anniey: You could always take it out and count it. Chax: Where’s the fun in that?

Rose: Hey, Jimi, have you thought about having children? Jimi: ... Jimi: Does looking over you and the others not seem like I already do? Because I promise you, it sure feels like it. Rose: But we're not childr- Jimi, already distracted: SAL, PUT THE FIRE DOWN!

Takky: The risk I took was calculated but, man, am I bad at math.

Crystal, rushing into the room: It’s terrible, just terrible! I am so upset! Sal: Crystal, honey, sit down! Sweetheart, tell us all about it. Briar, would you get Crystal some water? Briar: What are they gonna do with water? Has water ever made you feel better when you were upset? Have you ever heard anyone say, “Thank God, the water’s here!”?

Sal: *sneaking in through their window* Jimi: *turning in their chair and flicking the light one* You want to tell me where you've been all night? Sal: I was with Stars? Stars: *turning in their chair* Wanna try again?

Briar: Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, and wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. Rose: That's deep. Crystal: That means that ketchup is a smoothie. Rose: That's deeper. Stars: ...You guys are idiots.

Jimi: Every zoo is a petting zoo unless you’re a coward. Anniey: I’m worried about you.

Takky: Hello friends! The Squad: Takky: You might be wondering why I’m taped to the ceiling

Anniey: We need to open this locked door. Jimi, give me your credit card. Jimi: Here. Anniey, pocketing it: Thanks. Aaron, break down the door.

Jasmine: My expectations were low but holy fuck.

Takky: WHO THE FUCK- Stars: Whoa, language! Takky: I speak fucking English! Stars: ...

Briar: Why are you late? Jasmine: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness. Briar: Overslept? Jasmine: Overslept.

Briar: *sees Stars and Takky together* Briar: They're cute. I would put them on a boat. Rose: You mean... you ship them?

Stars: *seductively takes off glasses* Wow, you're... blurry.

Briar: *visiting the squad* Hello, I just came to- Briar: *sees Takky shoving Aaron into the washing machine while Stars records and Rose watches* Briar: *retreating* Something suddenly came up.

Stars: Is this your plan B? Anniey: Technically, this is plan P. Stars: Plan P? Is there a plan M? Anniey: Yes, but I marry Jimi in plan M. Jimi: I like plan M.

Rose: We have to plan, we have to figure something out. Mahn: Rose, when have any of our plans ever actually worked? We plan, we get there, all hell breaks loose.

*While the Squad is in a battle* Anniey, trying to warn about the location of an enemy: To the left! Takky: Take it back now y'all!

Jimi: Like, no offense to myself and all, but what the fuck am I actually doing?

Stars: Don’t stay up all night, Jimi. Last time you got this sleep-deprived, you tried to eat your own shirt.

Mahn: Fruits that do not live up to their names; passionfruit, grapefruit, honeydew and dragonfruit. Mahn: Fruits that do live up to their names? Mahn: Orange.

Chax: Sometimes I get so caught up on being gay that I forget I’m actually bi.

Takky: Ugh, crushes are so dumb. Jimi: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid. Takky: But you’re always acting stupid? Jimi: ... Jimi: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

Stars: Is anyone going to tell me what's going on in here?! Sal: It's kind of complicated, but Anniey- Stars: Got it. Forget I asked.

Anniey: Takky, please calm down. Takky: I asked for two large fries! Takky: *dumps fries onto table* Takky: But all they did was give me a MILLION FUCKING LITTLE ONES!

Takky: It's not like I try to blow things up, exactly. It just sort of happens. You've got to admit though, fire is fascinating.

*the squad is at a dinner party but someone has been murdered* Aaron: You’re acting pretty carefree for someone who’s life’s at stake. Who’s to say you aren’t the killer? Mahn: It’s a murder, not a tax audit. I’ll be fine. Anniey: What about Crystal? Nobody ever suspects Crystal! Crystal: Well what about Rose? They have a gun! Rose: Aaron has a knife. Aaron: Yeah, for fun, not for murder! *stabs Anniey in the arm*

Mahn: Anniey is not a morning person. Or a night person. There’s really only about seven minutes a day you are fun to be around. Anniey: The best part is you never know when they’re coming.

Briar: You... you saved me. You're not a beast at all. YOU'RE A HERO, AN UGLY UGLY UGLY HERO! Jimi: Call me ugly again, and maybe I will eat you.

Takky: So anyways have y'all seen Anniey? Mahn: I think they went in Chax's room 'studying'. Aaron: Doubt that. I heard groans there. *Meanwhile in Chax's room* Anniey & Chax, fighting:

Stars: Lol. Heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you’ll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this. Takky: What did you do Stars? Stars: a Mistake.

Chax: Oh look who got laid last night. Jimi: That’s right chumps, missionary accomplished!

Jimi: Can we talk about that mass email you sent? Anniey: Why? It was important. Jimi: All it says is, "I'm back on my shit". Sal, shrugging: The people need to know.

Sal: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash. Mahn: Oh. We're going out? Sal: Wh...

Chax: Being half asleep and feeling someone gently plant a kiss on your forehead is one of the purest kinds of love in the world. Crystal: Unless you're home alone.

Takky: DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT JOKE WAS FUNNY? IT WASNT. NOBODY IS LAUGHING. Takky: *pulls up a graph* THIS IS WHEN YOU TOLD YOUR JOKE, YOU HAVE SONGLE HANDEDLY RUINED COMEDY! IVE ALSO ASKED MANY COMEDY SCHOLARS ON THEIR OPINION OF YOUR JOKE AND THIS IS WHAT THEY HAD TO SAY! Aaron: I've been researching comedy for the past 20 years, and I have genuinely never seen a joke this bad. We have used quantum physics to look into alternate universes to see every joke made, and yours was still by far the worst. Takky: CONGRATULATIONS! YOUVE SINGLE HANDEDLY CREATED THE WORST JOKE IN HUMAN HISTORY! HERES A MEDAL! *pulls up a horrible ms paint drawn star that says "you need help*

Stars: So, Jimi is late today. Anyone wanna bet why? Stars: I say they slipped through the subway grate and is having terrible sex with the mole man. Takky: I don't know about that...I think either their alarm clock didn't go off, or they're in line at the bank. Sal: Take this more seriously! Jimi was clearly taken in their sleep! Rose: I bet they tucked themselves into the bed too tightly and got stuck. Anniey: Maybe they fell into another dimension where they're more interesting...? *Jimi arrives* Jimi: Sorry I'm late - there was a problem at the bank. Takky, clapping their hands in excitement: HOT DAMN!

Crystal: Truth or dare? Chax: Truth. Crystal: How many hours have you slept this week? Chax: Chax: Dare. Crystal: Go to sleep. Chax: I don't like this game.

Mahn: You bought a taco? Jasmine: Yes. Mahn: From the same truck that hit Chax?! Jasmine, with a mouthful of taco: Well, me starving ain't gonna help them.

Sal: Don’t be sad! Aaron: Why not? Sal: Sal: I don’t have a good answer.

Chax: Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.."

Chax: You know, Jimi, when you generalize, you tell general... lies. Jimi: ... Jimi: Are you trying to teach me moral lessons through puns.

Anniey: *double checking supplies in the boat* Compass. CB radio. Sunscreen. Briar: Hot dog costumes! Anniey: I’m sorry, what? Briar: You know, in case we get lost at sea, and one of us, probably Von, goes mad with hunger, we’ll put these on. Von hates hot dogs, so they probably won’t eat us. Anniey: Are you saying that Von would rather eat us than hot dogs? Von: I do hate hot dogs.

Crystal: Is it still visible? Where Rose slapped me? Mahn: Your face looks like a don't walk signal. Von: Your face looks like a photo negative for the hamburger helper box. Sal: A palm reader could tell Rose's future by looking at your face. Takky: The phrase 'talk to the hand cause the face ain't listening' doesn't work for you, because the hand is your face. Crystal: ...A simple 'yes' would've sufficed.

Rose: Do you think different paints have different tastes? Takky: They do. Stars: ...Why did you say that with such certainty?

Chax: Everyone, calm down! We're grown-ups, let's deal with this like adults! Briar: So, we're just going to wing it and hope for the best? Chax: Obviously. Now, Rose, pass the shovel.

Crystal, spraying a melted cutting board with a tiny water gun: We gotta cool this bitch down. Cool it down. Rose: I actually just put the cutting board in the oven... Chax, visibly confused: Okay, so they decided to put the cutting board in the oven? Crystal, spraying Rose: You FUCKING DUMBASS! Rose: Dude, I forgot- Crystal: OH MY FUCKING GOD! We're trying to make Chicken Alfredo right now, and you fucking MELT the cutting board in the oven at 400 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT!? Sal: *Watching in complete confusion while trying to process this whole situation.*

Jimi: I’m genuinely surprised you haven’t gotten arrested, let alone gotten a felony yet. Takky: Nat 20 Charisma. Jimi: That is NOT how that works-

Chax: Not to be nsfw but I want someone to hold me while I sleep.

Chax, trying to comfort Stars: What's the problem? Anxiety? Low self-esteem? Obsessive thoughts of random arson? I've been there.

Stars: I think I should be allowed on ghost hunter tv shows. Mahn: I think that would be dangerous for the ghosts.

Jimi: What do you want then? Mahn: Er… something work related. Jimi: What department is this? Mahn: Sorry? Jimi: Well, if it’s work related you’d obviously know what department this is. What department is this? Mahn: *looks at Briar and Jasmine* Some sort of homosexual department?

Briar: Define “dream”. Mahn: Dream - the first thing people abandon when they learn how the world works. Anniey: That’s too dark!

Jasmine: I don't know, it's not my cup of tea. Sal: Well then whose is it? Jasmine, staring at a cup of tea: I don't know!

Jasmine: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat? Takky: >:O language Aaron: Yeah watch your fucking language Von: Okay, who taught Aaron the fuck word?! Briar: 'The fuck word'. Rose: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time Aaron: Oh my god they censored it Briar: Say fuck, Rose. Aaron: Do it, Rose. Say fuck.

Jimi: Does anyone know how to relax? Asking for a friend.

Takky, texting Sal: Roses are red, Tony Hawk is a skater… Sal′s phone, auto-replying: I’m driving right now–I’ll get back to you later. *Later* Sal, texting back: Fuck you.

Jimi: I dunno if I'm ready to process the ramifications of this bullshit.

Chax, about Stars and Rose: My god, would you two just get a room already? Rose: Excuse me, Chax? Chax: You both just keep agreeing about horrifying things and relishing everybody else's misery. So seriously, when's the wedding? Stars: ... Anniey: I ship it! Takky: CAN YOU NOT?

Stars: Is five a lot of followers? Sal: Depends on the context. Sal: On Instagram? No, not a lot of followers. Sal: In a dark alley? Yes, a lot of followers.

Takky: Nice rock. Chax: Thanks, Jasmine gave it to me. Jasmine: I threw it at you! Chax: Aren't they the sweetest?

Stars: Anniey has discovered "deez nuts" jokes and it's all they say now. Everything is deez nuts. They simply can't stop. Stars: I asked Anniey where they learned that joke. They made me promise they wouldn't get in trouble if they told me. I agreed. Stars: So they lean in and whisper, "deez nuts."

Mahn: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute. Stars: No, that's not how you make cookies. Aaron: FLOOR IT!! Mahn: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!? Stars: yOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN- Mahn: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES! Chax: DO IT! Stars: NO-

Jimi: Is there something you would like to say, Anniey? Anniey: Oh, there are SEVERAL things I would like to say.

Crystal: Where have you been all day? Mahn: Oh, just dealing with things way beyond my maturity level.

Rose: *casually taking four stairs at a time* Jimi, falling behind, taking two stairs at a time: Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fu-

Rose: Don’t preach to me about romance, Takky. I had a three-way in a hot-air balloon.

Briar: Wait a minute, how did this happen? We're smarter than this! Aaron: Apparently, we're not.

Briar: Your lover doesn't have the mental strength to caramelize onions. Anniey: Your lover thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions. Stars: Who's fucking caramelizing onions? Have you sociopaths forgotten that apples exist? Von: Do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions.

Aaron, hungover: Please tell me I'm imagining that I claimed I was king of the ducks. Crystal: I would, but then I would be lying to the King of All Ducks.

Mahn: Sorry, I'm late to the party. I've been doing things. Anniey, entering in an unbuttoned shirt: I got caught up doing things too. Sal: Wow, Mahn was late too! What a coincidence!

Stars: When you said 'Magic in Bed', I wasn't expecting this... Takky: *pulls out card from deck* Now, was this your card? Stars: Holy moly-

Anniey: Swear words are illegal now. If you say one you'll be fined. Stars: Heck. Anniey: You're on thin fucking ice. Anniey: Oh no-

Sal: Could you be anymore annoying? Takky: Yes.

Sal: What’s sexting? Jimi: I'm not having this conversation with you.

Stars: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake. Takky: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear. Stars: ... Stars: You mean ring bearER, right? Takky: ... Stars: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

Takky: Welcome to Fucking Applebees, do you want apples or bees? Von: Bees? Takky: THEY HAVE SELECTED THE BEES! Von: Wait- *Chax approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly*

Rose: What’s your body count? Jimi: Do you mean sex or murder?

Anniey: Hey, Chax you're smart, tell me what would happen if I chugged 3 gallons of chloroform. Chax: Have you ever been to a mortuary? Anniey: Yea, my grandma lives there. Jimi: That is the worst response to that question.

Mahn: I’d like to live through a week that’s not a whole new verse of “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

Jimi: Is stabbing someone immoral? Rose: Not if they consent to it. Takky: Depends on who your stabbing. Stars: YES??!!?

Mahn: *watching the squad's shenanigans with concern* Do you feel like this has gotten out of hand? Stars: I don't know. Feels normal enough for a group that's on 911's blocked callers list.

#writing #ish?#let me tell you about mah ocs

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