#'why did u not give him the satyr legs' it took me so long to make his face look even remotely like himself i completely forgot about them

[babygirlificationn]

Joji babygirl meme redraw because i am insane.

Bonus lineart + reference image i made for my own convenience and lowkey find hilarious 💗🐐

[aj-the-satyr]

Malarkey at Cobb Mansion

The Mansion definitely looked old, that at least was a plus. The driveway didn’t seem like it had ever had much traffic. It looked like the sort of place that would need their brand of help but Lars still wasn’t happy, far from it.

Marcus gave him a grin from the passenger seat. “See! Told ya! Legit job and everything. Business cards and flyers are a great idea..... oh.... you’re still mad aren’t you?”

“It’s hard not to be..... you went behind my back Marcus.”

The grin vanished. “But.... I thought you wanted to start a business.... I was helping.”

“By naming the business Malarkey!?”

“Marcus and Lars, Key to solving your supernatural problem!”

Lars sighed. “I read the cards you had made....” it was hard to stay mad at his overly enthusiastic Satyr friend. “You do know what malarkey means right?”

“It means we’ll get to the bottom of things and fix your problems!”

Lars headbutted the steering wheel, the horn protested the violence with an off key semi squeal.

“Lars? You ok? Hey this place has a graveyard out front..... weird. Who does that?”

“Rich people I guess. Can’t be weird when you’re rich, or at least no one points it out to your face. Bump” he announced as he continued along the driveway. He glanced Marcus’s way just in time to see him bounce of the roof of the car. The covering above the passenger seat was a mess of tears and holes.

“OW! I hate cars.”

“No... you hate bumpy roads. Gonna have to fix the upholstery again.”

“Well you should be happy that we got a job then.”

“You got a job. I’m just part of this business that you set up without me.”

“I was helping.”

Lars shook his head. “Don’t sulk, you’re cuter when you smile.”

“Really?” Marcus smiled a little. “I’m cute?”

“Don’t push it goat boy.”

“Hey! Don’t call me that.” He sniffled. “I don’t like that.”

Lars stopped the car. “Sorry, still a little mad. Let’s see how this job goes. I mean we got several graves out front high possibility that we’ll see a few spirits hanging around. Only question is whether we need to boot them out or make a deal between them and the new owners.”

“No Exorcism?”

“Not if we don’t have to.”

“Then why’d we bring all the stuff?”

“Are you even paying attention Marcus? We.....” he sighed. “Let’s just go look at the place.” He got out and pondered briefly if he needed anything from the bag, probably not he decided. Despite the graves he didn’t feel anything really malevolent here. Mansion itself didn’t seem to be too run down either. I mean it clearly seemed to have been abandoned for a while, but it all felt.... undisturbed.

“Hey Marcus who hired us to do this again?”

Marcus shrugged as he closed the passenger door. “Some guy.”

“Some guy?”

“Yeah he came up to me at Donny’s said he’d seen a flyer and wanted help.”

“Where’d you leave the flyers?”

“Local bookstore, some mystic shops, places like that. Gave Donny a few too. Oh and the cards. Guy had one of those.”

“This guy got a name?”

Marcus shrugged again. “Probably. Gave me this address an envelope of money and asked us to check the place.”

Lars put his face in his hands wishing he’d asked more questions earlier or that he hadn’t got out of bed today. He pulled out his phone. “That’s something.” he mumbled to himself as it sprang into life. “Got signal at least.”

“To be honest I was surprised you didn’t ask me all this earlier Lars.”

“You waived 5000 dollars at me. You could have got me to do anything.”

“Anything?” Marcus grinned.

Lars rolled his eyes. “If you want that you just have to ask nicely.... not now!” he said spotting the look in Marcus’s eyes. “Job first.”

“Then?” Marcus waggled his eyebrows.

Lars sighed and shook his head. “We’re here to check if this place is haunted because someone wants to move in and that’s where your mind is?”

“Most of the time.”

Lars rolled his eyes again. “Let’s go do this. This place got a name?”

“Guy said it was Cobb Manor.” Marcus fell into step beside Lars. “Whatcha looking for?”

Lars’ thumb swiped over his phone screen. “Info about this place. Notable events and.... the fact that the entire family was cursed..... great.”

“Cursed?”

“Yeah, it’s vague but apparently no one in the family lived very long and there is talk of a curse.”

“Should I grab the bag?”

Lars paused for a moment. “No..... I don’t feel anything bad. I think we can talk this one out. Guy didn’t straight up say he wanted things banished right?”

Marcus stopped, almost tripped then tried to make it look like he was planning to stumble and pose, Lars just rolled his eyes. “Er.... not really. Just to check the place out see what, if anything, was here.”

“Huh.... well I need the money.”

“We.”

“What?”

“We. It’s Malarkey, Marcus and Lars the....”

Lars waived a hand to cut him off. “Fine, fine. We. Whatever.”

“Those cards and flyers cost money!” Marcus stamped a hoof.

“And you’re being a kid again. Come on. At least tell me you got the key to this place.”

Marcus sniffled. “Was that a goat joke?”

Lars stopped and took a breath before heading back to Marcus and giving him a hug. “No, it wasn’t. Seriously though man, I love you but you act like a child sometimes.”

“Sowwy.”

Lars rebelled against his instincts to say something, giving Marcus another squeeze before heading back towards the front door. “Key?”

“Oh! Yeah. I got it.” Marcus produced a rather large iron key.... from somewhere. Lars wondered if Satyr legs came with magical pockets built in.

“Well that’s good. Saves us a trip back.”

“Why would we go back?”

“Yes officer I did break in but it was to perform an exorcism.”

“Oh.... not a tv show.”

“No we are not. We’d be getting paid more.” Lars stepped up onto the rather expansive porch that surrounded the front door. “Key.” He held out a hand. Although thinking about it 5000 was a lot of money for something that seemed so simple. Just what was the catch here?

The voices drew her to the window, the years of grime no impediment to her peering outside. She wondered why the staff hadn’t bothered to keep them clean but the voices were certainly more interesting to think about. Men, two of them. Both seemed young, older than her of course, but young nonetheless. Was one of them wearing furry trousers? No..... no he wasn’t wearing furry trousers at all, those were his legs. She could see he had hooves as he made his way up the front stairs. He had horns as well. She’d been distracted enough by his legs she hadn’t noticed till now, had the Devil himself come to pay her a visit? Was he even here for her or was this something to do with the family curse? It looked like today might be interesting after all and they even had their own key.

The key was heavy, old school. Lars fought with the lock a little as he tried to turn it. There was a CLUNK just seconds before Marcus was going to make a joke, Lars muttered a thanks.

“What was that?” asked Marcus.

“Just glad the key works.” He said pushing open the door. “Huh... dusty.” the dust was kicked up by the breeze from the now open door. “Might have at least wanted face masks for this one. It’ll air out soon enough I guess.”

“Gentlemen.” came a young female voice.

Lars smirked, always fun when the denizens came to greet you. Saved the hassle of hunting them down. He looked at the owner of the voice. Wow. Purple. Purple was the color of the day indeed. Everything about her was purple, except the long black cigarette.... no that was a cigar holder. Hell even the cigar was purple. He blinked a little. “Miss.”

She ignored him for the moment and focused on Marcus. “Are you the Devil?”

Uh oh thought Lars. He reached for Marcus a second too late, he was already gone. Lars sighed. “You’ve upset him Miss.”

“Oh. But his legs..... He has horns.”

“And he’s rather sensitive to his looks. People make assumptions about him, most of them aren’t very nice.” He watched the young girl in purple frown, not a becoming sight on the young face. She certainly seemed corporeal enough, but there hadn’t been anyone living here for decades as far as he could tell. “If you’ll excuse me I have to go console my friend.”

“Ok.” she watched him go after his furry legged friend. She hadn’t meant to upset him, it was after all, merely a question. He did so fit some of the more religious paintings that she’d seen. She let her mind wander a little, the smoke from her cigar twisting and turning, forming vague figures as her memory searched for the source of those thoughts about the man. It couldn’t have been one of her Father’s could it? No his taste kept to his love of the hunt and all things related. It might have been at one of those dreadfully boring parties at a friend of his. One where they thought she might have had fun with the other children, but then only really spent time sneaking things out of the house like cigarettes, cigars, whiskey and the like. Must have been from one of those places. She nodded at her own decision. Must have been.

Lars looked skyward as he hugged an upset Marcus. “Come on man. Lets go back and get an apology from little miss purple. She didn’t mean anything by it.”

Sniffles were followed by a quiet “You really think so?”

“Yeah. Just one of those old rich people who say what they’re thinking because no one taught them any better.”

“Old? She looks twelve.”

Lars sighed. “You know what I mean, old like this place is.”

“So she died young?”

“Yeah, sadly. Whole family died pretty young so the internet tells me. That must be Lilly, the youngest. She was the last to go, although from how vibrant she is I’m not she she realises she’s gone yet.”

“Huh?”

“She’s either a very strong spirit or hasn’t quite gotten over the fact she’s dead. I can’t tell which.”

“Can we exorcise her now?”

“No Marcus, we are not going to exorcise her just because she upset you.” he held up a finger before Marcus could complain. “We’re going to talk to her and explain the situation.”

“Aw.... Ok.”

He rolled his eyes as they made their way back towards the entrance hall. Thankfully little miss purple had decided to remain waiting there for them.

“Lilly.... isn’t it?” asked Lars

“Miss Lilly Cobb.” she said with no uncertain pride.

“Well Miss Cobb, I would like you to apologise for upsetting my friend.”

She puffed a little on the cigar before nodding. “Sorry I upset you.”

Lars smiled. “Thank you.” the fact that everything about her was purple was still a little.... odd. “I’m Lars and this is Marcus.”

“And we’re Malarkey, the key to solving your supernatural problems!” finished Marcus.

Lars put his face in his hands but Lilly just looked thoughtful. “I really don’t think they’ve been a problem at all really. It’s what one gets for putting the graveyard so close to the house.”

“Not a problem?” asked a confused Marcus.

“No. I mean I sometimes wake up to find Mother wandering about or Father trying to organise a hunt again but it’s no bother.”

Lars couldn’t suppress the groan. Today was going to just be one of those days he could feel it.

(Still think it’s weird that anyone would request me to write something but hey, it’s a funny old world. I’d like to thank @waldorkler for the use of their OC @lilly-cobb and I guess since I write in small snippets of scenes, this one isn’t quite finished yet.)

[murasakiyuzu]

43 + a ship of your choice!

is it

is it still a drabble if its 1k? sweats

i guess i should practice drabbles a bit more lmao………

but this rly helped me get my Writing juices running again, so thank u for sending me a prompt, @satyr-syd! i hope ull like this silly thing, i rly admire u and ur writing

edit: read on AO3 here!

Oikawascurries into Hanamaki and Matsukawa’s shared apartment, banging the door shutand pressing his back against the reassuring solidity of wood. His chest isheaving and his hair… is as perfect as ever, somehow. Yet, out of habit,Oikawa raises a hand to fiddle with his bangs.

In theliving room couch facing the door, Hanamaki and Matsukawa turn their heads toregard him with twin aloofness. Hanamaki is lying on the couch with his headpillowed on Matsukawa’s lap, while his boyfriend is holding a bunch of grapesin one hand and seemingly using his other one to pop one purple pearl at a timeinto his beloved’s waiting mouth.

Oikawaspares one thought to how ridiculous his best friends are before he letshimself slide down against the door and sits on the floor.

After aminute of silent observation, Hanamaki and Matsukawa resume their earlieractivities.

“Aren’tyou going to ask me why I’m here?!” Oikawa protests while Hanamaki blissfullychews on a grape.

“Thisgirl on TV said it’s best to not pressure your friends into telling you theirproblems and just wait for them to come forward on their own,” Matsukawatells him lightly, pushing a grape between his own lips.

Oikawaopens his mouth and grapples for a retort, but ultimately groans infrustration.

Hanamakiglances at him with a smirk. “What’s your problem today, pretty boy?”

The airaround Oikawa seems to brighten up; whether it’s because he’s finally receivingthe attention he wants or because he’s been called pretty, it’s hard to tell.Perhaps it’s both.

“Youknow about Iwaizumi Hajime, right?”

Matsukawablinks. “The Iwaizumi Hajime in the same year and major as me? The guy yousaw talking to me on my way out of Art History class and proceeded to shamelesslyintroduce yourself to and spent three entire days telling me he’s been sculptedby the gods? That IwaizumiHajime?”

Oikawafrowns, but there are splotches of red and pink across his cheeks. “Yeah,that one.”

Matsukawaleans back on the couch with a satisfied little grin. “What abouthim?”

“Well…”Oikawa wrings his hands in a rare show of awkwardness. He usually plows througheven the most embarrassing of stories with a devil-may-care smile, so Matsukawaand Hanamaki’s joint interest is obviously piqued.

“Weeeeell…?” the two echo him inteasing coos. Oikawa glares at them and breathes deeply.

“We’vebeen hitting it off pretty well since we met. I may look like an asshole when Isay this, but I didn’t expect him to be so thoughtful when he’s all big andmacho and… has beautiful tan skin and gorgeous arms and-”

“Focus,lover boy,” Hanamaki sing-songs.

Oikawapouts, but gets back on track. “Anyway, I haven’t had the best of luck inguys-”

“Becauseyou keep picking pushy ones,” Matsukawa interjects.

“Letme finish!” Oikawa shrieks, offended. “As I was saying, even though all the boys I’ve dated were gorgeous,things never seem to work out. We were on different wavelengths.

“Ithought Iwa-chan would be just like that and I decided to try harder to make itwork this time. But he’s completely different from everyone else! We had a few datesand he’s been really respectful of boundaries without my needing to tell himanything; he didn’t even force a kiss on me right on the first date!”

Hanamaki staresat him, long-suffering. “Did you come here just to sing Iwaizumi’s praisesinto the next century? We get it, you’re dating a literal prince.”

Matsukawa wordlesslyslides another grape into Hanamaki’s mouth, and he reaches a hand to Matsukawa’scheek, giving him a smitten smile. Before Hanamaki can tack on a “you’renot the only one” or something equally sappy, Oikawa continues with hisstory.

“I’llget to the point if you stopinterrupting, damn it. Anyway, in our last date, I told him I’m gray-ace. Ithought… he needed to know there’s a possibility I’ll never feel like havingsex with him, and he took it really, really well. He told me he’s dated ace peoplebefore, which explained why it’s been so easy with him.”

“Doyou want to marry him?” Matsukawa asks with a knowing smirk.

“Iwant to marry him!” Oikawa answers with a groan, burying his face in hishands.

“Then,why are you here now and not getting a dog with him or something?”

Oikawasighs and looks up at them once more. “We were hanging out in my apartmenttoday and watching a volleyball match on TV, and we started… making out alittle bit halfway through. We got into the subject of sex, but we were kind ofjust joking around… and I… may have said we should get neon condoms andsimulate a lightsaber duel…”

“YOUDID WHAT?!” Hanamaki screeches and springs up in the couch, very nearlyknocking his forehead against Matsukawa’s.

“I WASJUST JOKING, OF COURSE I WOULDN’T-”

Hanamaki isdoubling over in scandalous laughter while Matsukawa is just giving Oikawa areally puzzled look.

“Ican’t believe it… You said that… Oh my God, what would your fangirls say…The cool and smooth Oikawa-san…” Hanamaki wheezes. Matsukawa brushes apacifying hand against his boyfriend’s back when he starts coughing.

“Idon’t think that’s a reason to come here running,” Matsukawa says with a thickbrow raised.

“It istoo!” Oikawa cries out. “You didn’t see it- He just froze up and gaveme this really horrified look!”

“OIKAWA,YOU PROPOSED TO SWORDFIGHT WITH YOUR DICKS!” Hanamaki positively hollers,and there are tears in his eyes. Matsukawa finally breaks and sputters.

Oikawalooks red as a tomato and ready to flee, and Matsukawa knows the next place he wouldgo to is their university, and that’s one hour away. Better keep him close.

Matsukawabreathes in and puts on his best “voice of reason” face. “Listen,I’m sure you just surprised him. Did you even try to talk to him afterthat?”

“No, Ijust ran here,” Oikawa says meekly and curls in on himself. “What amI gonna do? Iwa-chan was perfect and I ruined everything.”

Matsukawarolls his eyes. “Look, Oikawa, what you need to do now is…”

A ringtone fillsthe air—an overlycheerful pop song that’s Oikawa’s new addiction. Matsukawa snaps his mouth shutas Oikawa tremulously retrieves the phone from his hoodie’s front pocket. He staresdown at the screen, and his panicked gaze tells them enough without words.

“Justtalk to him already,” Hanamaki sighs, peach-pink from his laughing fit.“If he’s that much of a prince, I’m sure you two can move away from thislittle incident.”

Oikawainhales deeply and exhales, nodding resolutely. Hanamaki and Matsukawa watchquietly as Oikawa picks up Iwaizumi’s call.

“Hey,Iwa-chan. Yes, it’s just- I’m really sorry, I said something stupid and freakedyou out. If you can just leave it…” A pause follows as Oikawa listens towhatever Iwaizumi has to say. Hanamaki has to hold in the whim to ask Oikawa toput the call on speaker. “Uh… No, it’s nothing, you should just forgetabout it…” Oikawa frowns at his legs, criss-crossed on the floor. Hesighs. “It’s from Star Wars, Iwa-chan. You know about Star Wars,right?”

Hanamaki issnickering again and Matsukawa has to lightly slap his thigh so he’ll get agrip. Oikawa’s bashfulness turns into shock.

“You’ve never watched Star Wars?! Iwa-chan! Still, most people know about thelightsabers, have you been living under a rock?” Oikawa stops, then gaspsin mock-offense. “You brute! We’re going to watch every one of the movieswhen I get there!”

Iwaizumisays something, and Oikawa is clearly melting with relief in front of his bestfriends. He smiles to himself. “Yeah, I know. Thank you, Iwa-chan.”

Oikawahangs up and drops the hand with the phone, seemingly lost in thought.

“Nowthat that’s taken care of,” Matsukawa says, breaking the silence,“can we commoners get a bit of time for ourselves? There’s some making outin order here as well.”

“Alright,alright,” Oikawa sighs and gets up from the floor. He smiles and opens hismouth to say something, but then halts. “I was going to thank you, but youdidn’t help at all.”

“You’rewelcome!” Hanamaki chirps and entwines his arms around Matsukawa’s neck.“Make us your best men at the wedding, alright?”

Oikawahuffs indignantly and leaves with a carefree wave of his hand. The door clicksshut and Hanamaki plants a kiss on Matsukawa’s cheek.

“Now, wherewere we?”