#'oh you should try the thick potion it's one of our classics' they said

[puff-daddy-archive]

Shocked and horrified that the thick potion does NOT in fact make you thicker than a snicker and just makes you feel like one of those really crappy stressballs for a few minutes

[mlleecrivaine]

Rockstar Hair

Author’s Note:  Been listening to a lot of classic rock lately and I thought the marauders might like the tunes as well.

Word Count:  2,462

Pairing:  Remus Lupin x f!reader

Warnings:  People asking to touch reader’s hair.  It’s implied that reader looks quite similar to James Potter.  Also, slightly steamy bits.

Summary:  After a potions class gone wrong, you show up to the Gryffindor house party with a new hairdo.  Remus can’t take his eyes off it.

---

You came back to the common room very late in the evening and the party was already in full swing.

One of the muggle-born students had brought out their record collection and the firewhisky was flowing thanks to a joint “secret mission” between James and Sirius and everyone had nearly forgotten about the potions accident by that time.

Remus hadn’t been able to think of much else this whole afternoon.  He was preoccupied with replaying the event over and over in his head, trying to determine how hurt you had actually been.

You screamed when the potion blew up, he knew that much.  You weren’t making any noise when the Hufflepuff, what’s-her-name, led you out to the hospital wing.  Was that a good sign or not?

When all the girls in the common room started squealing, he looked up with the others.

Everyone crowded around the portrait hole so he couldn’t see you, but everyone was calling your name excitedly.

“See, Moony?  She lives, as predicted,” Sirius announced with a dramatic sweep of his arm.

“Well she clearly wasn’t dying,” Remus retorted, craning his neck to see.

“Oh my!” Lily yelped as she got close enough to see you.  “Y/N, can I touch it?”

“What?” James whispered, standing from his seat on the couch.  Remus rose with him but James stood on the couch cushions first to see over the crowd.

“Of course,” Remus heard you say.

James’ eyes widened.

“Moony, you’re not going to believe this.”

“What?  What is it?”  Remus asked, feeling a sinking sensation in his chest, at war with himself over whether to try to see or not.

“Look.”

Remus got onto the couch as Sirius did.

You came through the crowd, all the other girls’ hands in your hair - your very short hair.

Remus just stared but Sirius burst out in delighted laughter.  You smiled sheepishly.

“What do you think, Sirius?” you called across the room.  “Do I look cool now?”

“Very!”  Sirius agreed, still laughing.  He jumped off the couch and sauntered over to her.  “May I?”

“Sure,” you replied with nervous giggle.

Remus’ heart ached as Sirius put his drink down on the nearest surface and ran his fingers through your hair as he might a lover before mussing it around with a gleeful growl.

“My girl, you look like a rock star!” he pronounced, taking a step back to admire his handiwork.

A couple of the girls giggled and Lily stepped in to return your hair to order.

“I think it looks nice,” Lily remarked.

“Oh come on, you think she looks like James!” Sirius accused, ruffling your hair up again into a rather attractive tousle.

“I don’t!” Lily exclaimed, blushing herself now and turned back to exchange a look with James.

“Does anyone have a leather jacket?” Sirius demanded.  “We may yet have the next Weird Sisters member in our midst.”

Remus tried not to cringe as he watched you shy away and giggle at Sirius’ attention.  He knew his friend was just tipsy and didn’t mean anything by it - Sirius knew full well how Remus felt about you - but it still smarted to know that by all realistic metrics, you were much more likely to want Sirius than him.  You didn’t know about him, likely never would, and if you ever found out his secret, you would probably just leave him be as he had been.

As Remus finished the drink in his hand, he watched you with a soft smile on his face as you discarded your robes and jumper on a chair and let a fifth-year boy help you into his leather jacket, stunningly just the right size.  You were openly laughing now with everyone else.

After loosening your tie and popping a few buttons on your blouse, you took the lapels between your fingers and popped the collar, then started to gyrate to the music like an American rocker.  Remus found his smile turning into a heated smirk.  You had talented hips, as it happened.

You took Lily’s hand and spun her around a few times to the raucous beat of the music and ran your hand through your own hair, biting your lip and giving the strands a little tug that Remus felt in his stomach.

Sirius laughed and clapped you on the back before moving on to flirt with someone else.

You stopped dancing after twirling Lily into you for a hug.  Still laughing, you smoothed out your hair and adjusted the jacket as you approached the couch.  Remus could see the bandages up the sleeves.

James nudged Peter and they both took their leave as you approached.  James shot you a wink, but you were looking at Remus.

“How does it look?” you asked him with a sheepish expression.  “Rock star material?”

Remus smiled.

“You can pull off any look you want,” he said, cringing at the smitten note in his own voice.

You grinned nonetheless and ran your fingers through your hair again, although this time Remus saw the self-conscious tilt to your mouth.

“It looks alright, though?  Not too short?”  you asked, ruffling it a bit.

“It suits you,” Remus said.  You look beautiful is what he wanted to say.  This length shows off your jaw and your cheekbones and it made you look downright sexy, but he can’t just tell his friend that, especially when he was hiding a rather large secret from you.

“Are you alright otherwise?” he asked, pointing to your sleeves.  “I saw bandages.”

“Oh, yes,” you said, shucking the jacket to show him.  You held out your bandaged forearms; your blouse sleeves were cut off above the elbow.  “Second degree burns.  Ruined my shirt, fried most of my hair too, obviously.  Madam Pomfrey put dittany salve on these and let me go.  I should get off with little to no scarring, she said.”

“I’m relieved to hear it.”

“Do you want to dance?” you asked, tossing the fifth-year’s jacket onto a nearby chair.

“Me?” he asked in a joking tone, trying to gauge if you were serious.  “Instead of one of your adoring fans?”

“Like me!” Sirius appeared and slung an arm over your shoulders, grinning like a madman.

“I was just asking Remus,” you said with uncertainty.

“And what did Remus say?”

“I’m alright,” Remus said, holding up his hands in surrender.  “By all means.”

“Um, sure then,” you said, flashing a grin at Sirius.  He started to pull you back to the make-shift dance floor but you tossed Remus a look over your shoulder before Sirius thrust a cup of firewhisky into your hand.

—

Remus spent the rest of the evening pretending to enjoy himself from the comfort of his couch with Peter while James snogged Lily in a corner and you danced with Sirius and a number of other students who all thought it was very novel that you looked like the missing member of The Rolling Stones.

As the hours dragged on, the lower-years and a few of the upper-years started disappearing to sleep off the firewhisky.  

After a while, you had been released from the dance floor and you came to rest next to Remus on the couch when Peter offered you his seat.

The stragglers had pretty much paired off for the evening and before too long the couples started disappearing as well.

You and Remus were eventually the only two left after James snuck Lily upstairs.  You were fading in and out between the drink and the exhaustion and Remus was trying to figure out the most tactful way to ask if he could help you upstairs so you could rest.

“You know,” you slurred after a while, your voice thick.  “I think I like short hair.  ‘S sexy.”

“Do you think so?”  Remus asked.  His heart skipped a beat; of the marauders, he was the only one who kept his hair short at the moment.  It had been longer a few months ago but one particularly nasty night made a change unavoidable.

“I do,” you shook your head so the short locks waved around on your head.  “I think it’s more practical.  And cool.  Or you make it look cool anyway.”

Remus couldn’t help but grin.

“I’m not sure I’d say I look cool,” he mumbled.

“I think you do,” you said.  “Your hair always looks tidy.  Sirius looks like a mess as often as he doesn’t.”

“So tidy is cool now?” Remus asked, giving you a sideways look.

“Sure,” you said with a drunken smile.  “Besides your scars give you all the devil-may-care vibes you need.”

Remus looked down at his hands.

“I’m sorry,” you said quickly, shaking your head.  “I know you’re self-conscious about them, I didn’t mean to -”

“No one’s ever told me they look cool before,” he said with a snort that he hoped sounded charming but that he was pretty sure sounded sarcastic.

“Sirius and them have done.”

“Yeah, but have you met them?”

“Touché.”

Remus looked at you and was surprised to catch you staring at his face before you quickly looked away.

“Can I-” he started before trailing off.

You looked back at him.

“You want to touch it?”

There was so much he wanted to touch, but he knew you meant your hair.  He nodded.

You grinned and leaned closer to him.

“I was wondering when you were going to ask; I think you’re the only one who hasn’t felt it yet,” you murmured with a soft giggle.

“This wasn’t what I was going to ask,” he replied, “but I was curious.”

“Then what were you going to ask?”

He lifted a hand to your head and threaded his fingers through your locks.  The strands were weighed down from the hands that had already been through it tonight, but the feeling still made him want to kiss you all the same.  Remus wished he could keep his hand in your hair forever.  It took him a moment to register the close-eyed, slack-jawed expression on your face as he dragged his fingernails along your scalp.  The look was almost too much for him and he knew he needed to stop.

He started to pull his hand back when you took the kill shot.

“Don’t stop,” you sighed.

The sound went straight through him and he returned his hand to your scalp.

You seemed to surface briefly and you took your chance to push forward and straddle him on the couch.

He gaped up at you for a moment before you lowered your head and brushed his lips with yours, silently asking permission to kiss him properly.

Against his better judgment, he tipped his head up and let you kiss him, following the lazy, deep pace you set.  You licked your way into his mouth as he tightened his hand in your hair.  He eagerly accepted everything you gave him, reveling in the way you lit his soul on fire.  Then his free hand gripped your hip and you rolled against him.  The electric shock woke him from his daze and he pulled back, leaving you gasping for air.

“We shouldn’t,” he whispered frantically.  “Y/N, there are things you don’t know about me; I can’t in good conscience -”

“You mean your scars?” you breathed, searching his eyes with yours.

“Um…”

“I’m fairly certain I already know, Remus,” you murmured.

“I… I desperately hope you don’t,” he whispered as if it were a prayer.

“You’re a… well… is there another reason you would miss class every full moon?”

Remus’ heart sank.  You knew.

“How…”

“Astronomy is one of my best subjects, Remus,” you said with a soft laugh.

Remus realized you hadn’t gotten up to leave.  You seemed to understand what he was thinking and you leaned down to press your foreheads together.

“It was hard not to notice,” you said.  “I missed you when you didn’t show up to class.”

“How long have you known?”

“Oh I don’t know,” you said with a playful shake of your head.  “A few years.  Since I started fancying you anyway.”

Remus’ stomach flipped.

“And yet…”

“Why would I let it deprive me of your company?” you asked.

He could see you itching to tip your mouth back to his, but you held back to finish the conversation.  It made Remus want to keep kissing you all the more.

“The you that’s here the other 27 days of the lunar cycle is much more interesting, really.”

“Y/N,” Remus sighed.  “I’m so dangerous.”

“But you’re really not,” you said with a giggle that made Remus want to pull back; how could you not take this seriously?  “You’ve been here for 6 and a half years and you haven’t hurt anyone yet.  I’d say you’re taking excellent measures to mitigate the danger.”

Remus couldn’t suppress the way his heart cracked.

“I know you’re dangerous that one night,” you said, lifting your hands to his face, running your thumbs over his cheekbones.  “I don’t want to insinuate that I don’t know.  But Merlin, I would do anything for the man who’s here the other 27 nights.  He makes that one night of danger worth the risk.”

Remus tipped his face up and let you kiss him again.  He sighed into your touch and gently fisted both hands in your hair.

“And if I remember correctly,” you said in a teasing tone, pulling back to take in his whole face, “it’s a new moon this evening, so really, we’re as far from danger as we could be tonight.”

He grinned up at you.

“We are that,” he agreed.

You licked your lips.

“I like you a lot,” you said with a nervous grin that crept over your heated face.

“And I you,” he murmured.  “I have had an unreasonably large crush on you for years.”

“Years?” you stared down at him.  “Blimey, what’s been stopping you?  Just the, er, lunar situation?”

He nodded sheepishly.

“Then you underestimate my tolerance for a good adventure,” you said with a devilish smirk, “because I have had a crush on you since precisely third year when you beat Severus Snape in that mock duel with your first spell.”

Remus grinned from ear to ear.

“I can’t believe you remember that.”

“I remember an embarrassing number of the things you do.”

“Well that makes two of us,” he said, smoothing your new fringe back, “because I remember more than I reasonably should about you.”

“So what do you say then?” you asked.  “Would you give me a chance to memorize more of you for 27 days out of a cycle?”

Remus’ legs froze when he answered.

“As long as you’re sure the beast on the 28th day won’t scare you away from me.”

“He won’t,” you promised before kissing him again.

---

Tags:

Everything:  @moirasterling @hermeowyn 

[potterwatch-transcripts]

FIRST BROADCAST: 17th NOVEMBER 1998.

Lee Jordan: Greetings Potterfans, River here, and welcome to another action packed episode of Potterwatch. Today, with me as always, is my cohost and partner in crime, Rapier.

George Weasley: A pleasure to be back River. I would just like to make it clear, no crimes were commuted in the creation of this show. Any that we did commit were purely accidental.

Lee: Except setting a murderous House Elf on Rita Skeeter, that was intentional.

George: And we were acquitted by the wizengamot due to lack of evidence. That and the minister of magic said, and I quote ‘we still have Death Eaters to catch, I literally could not care less’.

Lee: Indeed, vote Shacklebolt for minister.

George: Shacklebolt 2001. Make the ministry mirthful again.

Lee: Now Rapier, what has been happening in the world since last we took to the airwaves like a Harry Potter obsessesed Hippogriff?

George: Well River, funny you should mention Harry Potter obsessed Hippogriffs. It turns out that world famous boy wizard Harry ‘Oblivious to women’s emotions’ Potter has been harbouring a fugitive.

Lee: Gosh Rapier, really?

George: That’s right River. Legendary former toddler H. J. Potter esquire has been harbouring the noted hippogriff and convicted felon ‘Buckbeak’. Buckbeak was sentenced to death several years ago for allegedly mortally wounding Draco ‘My father will hear about this’ Malfoy. Additionally, Buckbeak aided in the escape of famed criminal and good boy, Sirius Black.

Lee: But was mr Black not posthumously cleared of all charges?

George: Correct River. However, at the time this feathered felon was still aiding in a criminals escape, and should be brought to justice.

Lee: Are you suggesting we campaign to send Buckbeak to Azkaban.

George: Not only am I suggesting jail for this clawed criminal, but I also suggest Harry Potter should be imprisoned for upwards of 50 years for harbouring a known fugitive.

Lee: I support this Rapier. Justice must be done.

George: In other news, popular magazine the Quibbler has relaunched after nearly two years of being out of print. Those of you listening to the show during the reign of Ol’ Lord no nose will remember the Quibbler’s office was destroyed in what some have described as ‘A classic Potter’

Lee: We can exclusively reveal that myself and Rapier, as well as Harry Potter, Kreacher T. Elf, Horace Slughorn and Ronald ‘What were you thinking in your 6th Year’ Weasley will be just some of the guest writers.

George: My article is called ‘Minerva McGonnagal, Kitten or Kangaroo’. I seek to prove that the hogwarts headmistress is not in fact a proud Scot, but actually a 25yr Australian Enchantress called Stephanie Irwin.

Lee: Meanwhile, my article will seek to look into claims that Harry Potter is none other 3 Goblins in a surprisingly realistic person costume.

George: look out for other articles from us coming soon. And finally, after much debate, a new platform will be opening at Kings Cross Station. Platform 7 5/12 will be a direct line from London to Godric’s hollow, providing fans of the chosen one the chance to visit the ‘Harry Potter’ experience, sponsored by Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes.

Lee: I am very excited for this new Museum/Interprative Dance Show, opening in March 1999.

George: Fun fact for our fans River, if you slap a red wig in a house Elf, spitting image of Potter’s beloved sidekick Rob Weasley.

Lee: and now we turn to the interview portion of our show. Please join me fans, in giving a very warm welcome to ‘Rival’

Viktor Krum: Is pleasure to being here my friends.

Lee: Now Rival, you know Harry Potter fairly well, what’s he like?

Krum: Well River, Harry Potter is good man. I like him very a lot. However, he is not too bright.

George: oh really?

Krum: oh yes. I get to know him during the Triwizard tournament, and I come to conclusion that without Hermione Grainger, who is amazing witch, Potter would have been died two weeks into his first year in Hogwarts.

Lee: You’re not the first to say this Rival. So you like Potter, but think he’s a bit thick.

Krum: Yes I am liking Harry but am thinking he actually only knowing 2 spells. The Dementor Spell, in Bulgaria we call it the great protector. And Expelliarmus. I was at battle of Hogwarts and when I see him try to disarm the dark lord I am thinking ‘oh well, nice to know you Potter’ and am ready to try to kill Mister Voldemort myself.

George: Do you think you could have defeated the Dark Lord?

Krum: Oh yes, in my home country we knowing how to deal with Dark Wizards and beasts. I defeat my first Vampire age 9 with nothing but a firebreath potion and sharp stick. I sharpen stick myself.

Lee: How did you sharpen the stick Rival?

Krum: With another sharpened stick.

George: Amazing. You heard it hear first folks, Rival is probably the coolest dude I’ve ever met. And I routinely was punished by Minerva McGonnagal.

Krum: Your Madam McGonnagal is great woman. She remind me of the Lamya. Is a great Bulgarian dragon lady of much power.

Lee: Awesome. And finally Rival, how do you fancy your home nations chances in the Quidditch World Cup.

Krum: I am hoping we do very well. Is a good team, maybe better than team we have last World Cup.

Lee: Thank you Rival. That is all we have time for tonight. I have been River.

George: And I have been Rapier.

Lee: The next password will be ‘Buckbeak’. Stay tuned Potterfans, and remember, Harry Potter killed an evil wizard at 1 year old, with a full nappy, so there’s hope for us all.

[polvillodecanela]

Winter Craft

Hello! this is for @seablrd for the @caprisecretsanta2018 , please enjoy it.

Summary

On a Friday night is when the love potions are at its finest. Auguste knew that. Sadly, for Laurent, Auguste is not very keen of doing errands.

"They live among us."

Beep

"My niece was cursed by one of them and now all men leave her."

Beep

"We've hired a priest to exorcize the neighborhood; maybe he'll take them out, running."

Beep.

"Your total is 24.55", the cashier said politely.

"I have coupons, son"

Beep, beep, beep.

"Your total is 15.23"

The tinkling sound of small coins on the counter brought Laurent back to earth.

The market was buzzing with activity at that time of the night. The old woman in front of him was using all her pennies to pay, making them hit loudly on the counter. The cashier was busy and considerably angrier. Meanwhile, Laurent used the opportunity to take a better look at her: Plain, white hair; second-hand clothes (badly trifted) and worn shoes. She looked like a stereotypical witch herself, funny thing. Behind him, a couple was talking about a dinner with friends they will go later. Honestly, Laurent had more important things to do that being there, on an unmovable queue; also, he had four or five things to say to the now retiring old woman: 1. Yes, witches and warlocks live among you, or as his mother used to say "it's those imbeciles who live among us”

2. We are busy people, Karen, we do not have time to walk around casting curses on people. If your niece is left by all men, she must be a repellent person like you are.

3. If you call a priest to perform an exorcism, please make him go to our house so the man could try and cast out a couple of naughty spirits that Auguste let in last Monday who hasn’t let us sleep since.

The line advanced a little, the cashier directed an apologetic look at Laurent who returned the gesture. Now, a girl buying some candies. Laurent rolled his eyes when the girl used the classic I-forgot-my-money play to tried to steal some things. The cashier stopped her quickly and, politely, told her to leave. His eyes weren’t very warm though.

Finally, it was his turn.

"Let's see: Rosemary, Thyme, black tea in leaves, mint, lemons" the cashier looked at him through his red eyelashes, his eyes shining with high interest and a bit of mischief “The youngest de Vere has bought all this, today precisely on a Friday night ", then, he leaned in conspirational. “Who are you enchanting, huh? Is a she? Or, is it a he?”

Laurent felt his cheeks going a little bit pinky. If Ancel could guess what those ingredients were for, he can`t even imagine what would be of his reputation if someone older noticed that too.

"Shut up, Ancel and just tell me the price. "

The redhead giggled childishly.

"Your brother must tell me how to make my love potions more effective."

"Easy. You have to be graceful, not that plain...you've already lost. "

"And that’s why I'll charge you the non-magical fee. Its 8.50”

Laurent left the money and took everything acquired. The list wasn`t complete, though because of course, Auguste loved using Laurent’s precious full-moon Friday time as the errand boy for his next potion.

His older brother had been trying for months - M O N T H S - to have a little toss on the sheets with the guy of the vet clinic, who had come not long ago to the neighborhood. Months using his charms that, of course, would not work in a hetero guy.

But, honestly, who would dare to say Auguste the contrary, huh?

"Laurent!" Auguste had said a few days ago "I have it"

Auguste’s bright blue eyes gave Laurent all the clues to figure what was in his brother’s mind and he was sure as hell didn`t want to know. Sometimes being the smartest in the family was more a burden than a blessing

“A Brain? At last?" Laurent answered without looking up from his book.

A pillow crashed Laurent’s face.

"No, silly little brother” Auguste smiled, “a hair of the handsome Greek boy from the veterinary. He is going to be mine, finally. Nobody resists my charms”

If Laurent had a penny for every time he saw that smile… 

"Let me guess,” he said eyeing one of his brother’s pockets “sleep potion"

"It just took a few drops, no more." he lifted his shoulders as if it was not a big deal "he didn’t even fall off the chair".

Auguste did a show of stereotypical magician and from behind Laurent’s ear, he tucked out a thick tuft of dark long curly hair. He smiled triumphantly. "I'll make him surrender to my feet, you'll see, but before that… I’m lacking something, brother"

Laurent's stomach clenched. He felt the small twist that only meant that something was off as his brother gave him a bright blue look. Bad news

"No," Laurent said authoritatively, chin up.

"I have not asked for anything yet!"

"My answer is no."

"But I have to clean myself and my cauldron for the potion and you know that implies meditation and everything” he paused and did a fashion of remembering something “also, I have to get pretty for my date. So … please?”

"No, and nothing will change my mind," Laurent claimed, swearing to resist Auguste’s puppy eyes. He would die first.

Hours later, Laurent was still wondering how the hell he ended outside, on a perfect full moon night with a purchase under his arm that hasn’t even come out of Auguste’s pocket.

"I swear if Auguste makes me buy him condoms or some shit like that, I'll give him hemorrhoids and the party will be over."

 With heavy steps, Laurent walked towards the Flower Shop. A delicious smell of cinnamon invaded all his senses, that and the smell of new flowers and herbs gave the place an aura of festivity and easiness. Being a frequent costumer Laurent knew almost all the plants and herbs the crew offered there, he always found the ingredients he needed and Lykaios was nice to him, even that time when he went in the morning, the other employee (Erasmus?) were good to him.

Alright, he needed some roses and Damianas. What was a Damiana like? Were they just leaves? Did he need the flower? Many?  A few? In Auguste's chicken scrawl he could only read "a pinch of Damiana".

A pinch.

Damn it. Here is when knowing most of the herbs proved insufficient.

Laurent looked at the counter, completely empty. Probably she was doing inventory or something, he thought with a little bit of concern.

He looked around, just to confirm that he was the only one there, before reaching to his neck to extract a necklace with a navy blue crystal that seemed to hold the universe inside. He concentrated his energy and with a soft murmur said "Take me to the Damianas".

Walking through the small shop, Laurent let the small oscillating pendulum guiding him to some beautiful yellow flowers "They have to be those", he thought happily. He was so aware of the movement of the crystal that he didn’t feel a thing; a really solid bulge what was sitting on the bottom of other shelf so, naturally, he stumbled and fell heavily letting go the necklace that went to the bottom of the Damianas shelf. 

Laurent’s heart sunk as he let out a growl of frustration. The shelf looked heavy and solid and the crack where his chain passed was narrow and dark. He was ready to use a levitation spell when behind him, the thing he stumbled into went up. It was a person. Go figure.

Laurent looked up, up and up to find ... a dimple.

The young man in front of him cleaned his knees, put his hands on his hips and looked down at him, with the most sincere smile Laurent had ever seen, the leather apron resting softly on a thin hip and embracing - very well – his large biceps.

"I'm really sorry,” he said going a little bit pink “ the bell store broke this morning and I haven’t had the chance to put it back again, you were being really silent so I didn’t notice you."

"What about Lykaios?" Laurent said, recovering his voice. He was still sprawled on the floor.

"In maternity license" the other one raised Laurent taking him by the arm as if he were made of paper.

Laurent was a bit dumbstruck. To say that the new employee was big was an understatement.

"Oh, yes, I remember. She was very pregnant ", he said, abruptly. How eloquent.

“Yeah, because of that I'm taking the afternoon shift. Erasmus is in charge of the morning one. You know Erasmus?"

“Yes, of course,” No, he didn’t but maybe just maybe his brain wasn’t working good enough. It wasn’t weird if he had said that he didn’t know well the other boy since he always buys there at night. Why lie, then? Oh crap, he wasn`t being really smart at the moment. It wasn’t ideal.

The guy’s smile grew fonder if that was possible. Where on earth does one find people like this? Laurent wondered. The guy was glowing and the Christmas lights made wonders on his olive skin. And his biceps, he could perfectly wrap his both hands around one of those and still they couldn’t round them completely. Laurent checked if he had his mouth closed.

“How can I help you?" And again that dimple.

The guy’s smile was somewhat fond, weird thing considering Laurent actually kicked him while stumbling. Laurent smiled too, just a bit.

Don’t get too excited. 

"Damianas" he said. The guy’s smile turned playful.

"Here, at the front aisle" He walked to the shelf, the one where his crystal went under. "They are excellent for erectile dysfunction."

Laurent closed his eyes and counted to five before embarrassment made him turn that innocent man into a lizard.

"I didn’t know that. For the record, those are for my brother." Laurent explained, trying to sound less embarrassed that he was. 

"Oh, you should not blush. Many have that problem" he paused." By the way, when you tripped with me I thought I heard glassware. Did I break something?"

"A very old crystal from my family is under that aisle," Laurent said feigning indifference.

Without much effort, the guy pushed the shelf, flowers and all, and yielded it a few centimeters, just so that Laurent could lean and take his crystal. Okay, if Laurent was a little bit dumbstruck at first, now he was really stoned; with his eyes almost coming out of his sockets he inspected his necklace, it was intact and Laurent sighed quietly with relief. The employee returned the shelf to this original position without even breaking a sweat.

Seriously, where on earth does one find something like that?

"Hey” The guy let out an appreciative whistle “that crystal is very cute, matches with your eyes."

It was quite funny to see how the employee went from confident to goo when Laurent combed behind his ear a wild strand of his hair and put on the necklace. Laurent allowed himself to smile, just a little bit more as he curved his lips higher.

"Thanks, for the effort” Laurent got a bit closer “I'll take one of those” he signaled the yellow little flowers that were on a pot “and three roses, please. "

"Only three?" the guy tilted his head. Like a golden retriever, Laurent’s brain prompted.

"Yes."

The man went to do his work, taking a pot with him to carry the flowers.

"There we go,” he said. Dimpled smiled and all “they are 20 but since we are arriving at Christmas season, I leave them at 15. Now, a piece of advice: for whatever you are going to use them, use the leaves, not the flowers, uh sorry, for whatever your “brother" is going to do. Have a nice day"

Giving thanks, Laurent left the florist with more than one curse in mind for Auguste.  When he arrived, the smell of too many candles gave him nausea. Auguste was out of control. However, Laurent left the purchase on the dinner table and went to his room. He had been doing a study in his dream-journal and did not want to lose the connector wire.

Four books later he felt those little electronic touches of his brother's powerful magic. Apparently, whatever Auguste was doing was ready. He had completely forgotten to tell him the matter of the leaves.

"Damianas," he said as he heard a knock on the main door.

A curly haired tall and muscly man, with the expression of who prefers to be literally dead that there, found him in the entrance.

"Good evening," The strange said trying his best to sound kind or polite. Laurent frowned. The animosity was mutual.

"Oh, Nikandros, good evening" Auguste exited the kitchen with a thermos under his arm and wiping his hands with a cloth, like an older woman, his voice sounded like cheap silk. Laurent rolled his eyes. "We're leaving; I made some tea for us later."

Auguste gently guided Nikandros with a soft but powerful grip on his shoulder towards the exit.

"Laurent" he whispered, before following. "if everything goes well, do not wait for me tonight" and then, without any shame he had the audacity to wink at him.

"TMI, Auguste, TMI"

It didn’t go well. Crying, Auguste told him the next day that in his carelessness, the thermos that contained the powerful potion went to the floor spilling everything; how the potion stained Nikandros’s pants; how he almost killed him at dinner with an almond and how Nikandros had said goodbye rather coolly and with reason, honestly.

"Can you tell me how he agreed to go out with you in the first place?" Laurent said patting his brother on his head, trying to ignore how stained with mucus his t-shirt was.

"He lost a game of cards against me," Auguste admitted.

"Oh, you mean that you made him lose a game of cards against you."

"Those are meaningless details”

A week later, Laurent was heading back to Ancel’s store. The redhead was looking curious through his long eyelashes, taking note to see what else Laurent acquired to use it to his benefit. The old woman from last week was also there, taking a pancake mix.

Laurent smiled mischievously. He concentrated strongly on the package the old woman had in her hand, thought of sand, ashes, earth and finally, tasteless dietetic sugar. He felt a bit of his power leave his body as he spelled.

"I hope that thing tastes like shit". The old woman didn’t flinch. She didn’t even notice.

The line at the market moved faster this time. The old woman did her share about the failed exorcism. False, the naughty spirits were actually gone. Thank you, old repellent woman please enjoy your shitty pancake mix.

When Laurent put his items on the line Ancel let out a gasp “This is the first time I saw you buying the same ingredients twice. Did your brother fuck it up? How?”

“That’s none of your business, redhead” 

“Oof, he fucked up badly since you’re this angry. Here, I’ll give you a discount, pay me 5”

“That’s the magical fee” Laurent arched an eyebrow

“Ugh, you got me. I really can’t offer discounts”

That made Laurent Laugh.

“Nice try. Call me next time you’re doing free readings” Ancel’s green eyes shined with interest.

“Are you asking me for a reading? Is about a someone?”

“Don’t ruin my good mood, I warn you”

Ancel showed his hands in surrender. Someday he will be able to know some dark secrets. For now, he smiled and proceeded to register the next person’s items.

The bell of the flower shop worked on this occasion. Mr. Dimple was at the counter making a beautiful arrangement, wrapping in soft blue butter paper roses of many colors.

"Hello!” he beamed, once he saw Laurent. “What a pleasure to have you back, how can I help you?"

"Good afternoon, I would like again ...”

"DAMIANOS."

To Laurent's surprise, Nikandros went through the door as if his life was depending on it. His hair was a little disheveled and his expression somewhat lost. Laurent noticed a silver ring on his ring finger that was not there before, the engraving familiar to him. Auguste's sigils, probably a B plan. Bile gathered in his mouth as a headache started.

Nikandros stopped dead at the door when he noticed the blond young man, looking angry and flexing his hands with intention.

"Nik, good night,” The employee (Damianos) said, smiling “It's almost ready".

"Your name is Damianos" Laurent said, still looking at the ring. He was feeling a bit dazed, was it the cinnamon?

"You are Auguste's brother." Nikandros crossed his arms.

"Auguste?”  Damianos blurted out as Nikandros directed a cold stare at him, too late. “The guy you’ve liked since always and that always ruins your dates?"

"The what now?" Laurent directed his entire attention to Nikandros. It had to be a joke.

It wasn’t. The story took two hours in where it was clearly established that Auguste does not have the faculties to read people. Laurent was on the verge of crying for multiple reasons, all the lost afternoons of shopping, for nothing. All the "Laurent, stir the potion clockwise, not the other way" or "Laurent, do I look sexy or nah?" and "Laurent, I ran out of candles "at 2 in the morning. All because Auguste could not understand that not everyone who liked him was going to kneel and ask for his hand on a date.

He was almost dissociating when the comment reached his ears like a bomb.

"Double date, but not like a romantic double date but like a fun-with-friends double date, okay?"

"Huh?"

"You were not hearing?" Damianos said kindly. He really looked like a Golden Retriever.

"Oh, yeah sure" he lied. Without knowing he had dug his grave.

"Then" Damianos gave him a paper with a number, most likely his phone. "Text me?"

"Sure" He almost ran out of the store "Thank you, Damianos."

"Call me Damen, please.”

Damianos took Laurent’s hand gently, smiled – with that goddamm dimple of his – and winked, mischievously. Laurent heard Nikandros sigh behind him “And I’m being serious, call me."

[talesofmundanemagic]

Gertie and Bridget take a test

“Hey, Ernest,” Charlie Nessing said, gesturing for Ernest to join him and his brother Peter on the side of the classroom as everyone packed up to leave the latest Magic Club meeting.

“Yeah?” Ernest perked up and hurried to put away his things. He and the Nessing brothers had developed a shallow friendship within the Magic Club, but asking to talk to him after? That was new territory.

Charlie peered over at Mr. Jerson, the Magic Club faculty advisor. He wasn’t paying attention, but even so, Charlie tilted his head to indicate that they should leave the room.

Ernest followed Charlie and Peter down the hall, and Gertie, Bridget and Vivien stopped to wait, watching the three boys.

Charlie took a deep breath. “I was hoping you could help us with something.”

Ernest tried to show concern, instead of delight at being asked. “Help you with what?”

Charlie jolted at Ernest’s volume. At the word ‘help’, Gertie, Bridget and Vivien edged closer.

“The Flories School Exit Exam is coming up,” Charlie said, keeping his voice low. “Headmistress Clearwater told Peter that if he doesn’t pass it, he’ll be held back from graduating and will have to take summer school.”

Peter nodded grimly, standing at his brother’s shoulder.

“Really? You’ve only been here a few weeks.” Ernest said.

Charlie nodded. “I’m aware,” he said bitterly.

“That sucks,” Ernest said.

“That can’t be fair,” Gertie interjected, coming up behind Ernest. Vivien and Bridget followed her. “Did your parents try calling the headmistress?”

Charlie frowned, not making eye contact. “We talked to them. They said he should ‘study hard’.”

“I’m sorry,” Gertie said.

“I’ve already been admitted to Wespire U. If I don’t pass, they might...” Peter let his head hang. “I’m not the best test taker. Especially with that sort of threat hanging over me.”

“It’s such a stupid test,” Ernest grumbled. “I failed the last two years and have to take it again. I’ll probably end up in summer school too.”

“Wow, I didn’t know it was that bad,” Gertie said, looking worriedly at Bridget. “This is our first year at Flories, so we have to take it.”

“At least you’ll have more chances,” Ernest said.

Vivien, who had taken the F-SEE her sophomore year and hadn’t had much of a problem passing at her first attempt, bit her bottom lip and kept silent.

“I mean,” Ernest continued. “It’s just not fair. If I pass my classes, I should be able to graduate, right? Why should I have to keep taking the test until I scrape by?”

“Well,” Charlie said, pushing his thick-rimmed glasses up his nose. “What if we knew we were going to do well this time?”

Faye Nessing, Peter and Charlie’s younger sister, suddenly ran out of the classroom and pushed her way into the circle.

“I can hear what you’re saying in there,” she muttered. “Mr. Jerson was on the phone, but he’s coming now so-”

“I mean,” Peter suddenly said, seeing over Faye’s head that Mr. Jerson had entered the hallway. “If they kept the pool any colder during practice, my fingers would fall off. And that wouldn’t heal so easy, you know?”

“Yeah, you’d need an even more expensive charm to heal something like that,” Charlie said, good naturedly nudging his brother.

Peter laughed and played with the necklace around his neck. Bridget had noticed it had an enchantment on it; a healing spell would explain why they had seen him mend so quickly after getting in a fight.

“Have a good night, you guys,” Mr. Jerson said, waving as he headed in the opposite direction.

“You too!” Charlie replied with a grin. As soon as Mr. Jerson was gone, Charlie lowered his voice considerably. “Ok, so-”

“I don’t have to take the test until next year, and I have some homework and healing to do,” Faye interrupted. “If you get caught, make sure to mention I wasn’t involved.”

As the youngest Nessing sibling stalked off, Gertie and Bridget turned back to Charlie.

“Get caught?” Gertie repeated.

“What is she talking about?” Bridget asked.

“Headmistress Clearwater has the test booklets and the answer keys in her office,” Charlie explained, looking at Ernest. “After the way you handled the lock on that trick box, I was thinking you wouldn’t have any trouble getting us in. We grab a booklet and an answer key and we’re golden!”

Charlie and Peter nodded at Ernest, their expressions pleading.

Ernest took a deep breath. “Well…”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Gertie said, putting a hand on Ernest’s shoulder.

He didn’t move when she pulled. “Ernest, you’re not a cheater-” she started.

“Neither are we!” Charlie protested. “But think about what’ll happen otherwise!”

“What will the headlines say?” Peter asked. “‘Mayoral candidate Felix Nessing’s children fail out of school’?”

“I mean, by that logic,” Gertie said. “Can you imagine the same headline if you get caught stealing?”

“Oh come on,” Peter scoffed. “Like you’ve never used magic to pull one over on non-practitioners.”

Gertie and Bridget couldn’t argue with that.

“Besides, do you really want to stay here any longer than you have to?” Charlie directed this at Ernest. “We can’t do it without you.”

“I think we’re just going to go grab some dinner,” Vivien said sternly.

Gertie tried pulling Ernest away again.

“I’m in,” he said, yanking his arm away from Gertie. He wouldn’t meet their gaze as they stared in disbelief. “I’ll just grab my ukulele from my dorm. My magic will be more powerful that way.”

The Nessing brothers and Ernest walked towards the dorms, talking about the extent of Ernest’s musical magical gifts. Bridget, Gertie and Vivien watched them go.

“Pastapolis?” Bridget suggested.

“Yeah,” Gertie said, trying to push the feeling of betrayal down. “I’m starving.”

***

The next morning, on their way to breakfast, Gertie, Bridget and Vivien took a detour to Lonaickey Hall, the administrative building on campus. Gertie had a form that needed the Headmistress’ signature in order for her to to receive credit from an online course towards her enchanting apprenticeship license. Technically, the Headmistress’ administrative assistant, Toby, didn’t work on the weekend. But he was behind on paperwork and had told her he would be in the office and that Gertie could stop by.

“Plus,” Bridget had said, “We can see if the Nessings left any evidence.”

The building sure looked empty, despite the front door being unlocked.

The three girls passed the Headmistress’ office in order to go to the receptionist’s desk.

“I don’t see anything,” Gertie said, glancing around the surrounding hallway.

“Hey! Gertie! Is that you?” came a whisper.

Gertie paused, sharing a glance with Bridget. “Ernest?”

“Yeah!”

“Where are you?” Bridget hissed.

“Headmistress’ office!” came the anxious reply.

The three girls descended on the hallway door with “Headmistress Clearwater” printed in gold lettering on it.

“I thought you’d be long gone with the answers by now,” Gertie hissed back.

“We couldn’t!”

The door was ajar, and Bridget pulled it all the way open.

“Well, look at that,” Bridget said smugly. It was too good.

They were all trapped.

Ernest was covered in large, sticky spiderwebs, stuck against the very door Bridget had pulled open.

Peter was rolled up in the Headmistress’ dusty old rug, looking like a baby that had been thoroughly swaddled.

Charlie had managed to avoid both traps. He had failed, however, to notice that the cabinet was also enchanted, and it had sprayed him with a sleeping potion. He now snoozed with his face pressed against a half-open drawer, his glasses on the floor.

“Oh, did we forget to tell you that Headmistress Clearwater actually believes in magical security?” Gertie said. “Whoops.”

“Look, Gertie. We’ve been here all night,” Ernest said.

“We didn’t even take the answers,” Peter added.

“Just get us out of here so we can go home!” Ernest pleaded.

Charlie let out a rather loud snore.

“I don’t know,” Gertie said. “You being stuck here the rest of the weekend might be just what you need to realize that-”

“Oh, come on, Gertie.” Vivien good-naturedly pushed past her to investigate the webbing encasing Ernest. “It looks like a classic Spicron hunting enchantment. Just look up the release spell.”

Gertie huffed, but pulled out her phone.

“And that’s just an enchanted rug,” Vivien said. She fingered a thread pulling away from Peter’s trap. “Bridget, do you have any-?”

Bridget pulled a utility knife from her bag and opened the scissor attachment.

Vivien cut the thread, and the charm on the rug released, allowing Peter to wriggle himself free.

“You owe me two hours of sitting and charging my keychains,” Gertie informed Ernest as she drew on her stored power. She spoke the magic words that the online encyclopedia article said would release a Spicron enchantment.

The webbing melted away, leaving a large amount of white goop on the Headmistress’ carpets.

“That’s not going to be easy to clean up,” Peter said as he stood and stretched. His forehead was badly bruised from when he hit the floor, but faded as Bridget watched the magic on his necklace spark. He reached down and picked up his younger brother, hoisting him over his shoulder, and hung his glasses from his shirt collar. “Come on. I’m sure Faye can figure out what happened to him.”

The sound of the building’s front door opening as they left the Headmistress’ office made them all freeze.

“Back door!” Bridget hissed.

Vivien twisted the lock on the inside of the doorknob and pushed the Headmistress’ door closed. Everyone ran through the hallway, going for the back door that exited into the school’s parking lot.

Except Gertie, who walked in the opposite direction.

“Good morning, Toby,” Gertie said, as she entered Lonaickey’s lobby from the side hallway. Toby, Headmistress Clearwater’s assistant, smiled in greeting.

“Got the form?”

“Right here.” Gertie pulled the envelope from her back pocket.

“Great. I’ll have Abigail sign it first thing on Monday and I’ll send it in for you. Have a great weekend!”

“You too!” Gertie hesitated. “I mean, even if you’re working, I’m sure-”

“I know what you meant.” Toby smiled and headed to the Headmistress’ office.

Gertie made it out of the front door before she heard the shouting.

“I’ve told her a thousand times this would happen!” Toby groaned, seeing the mess that the Spicron trap had left. “What’s wrong with cameras? Why all this magical nonsense? There’s nothing even here! A mouse probably set it off!”

Bridget, Vivien, Ernest, and Peter, carrying Charlie, joined Gertie as she walked away.

“I hope you’ve learned your lesson,” Gertie said.

“Of course we have,” Peter assured her.

Ernest nodded, looking guilty that he had even attempted to cheat.

Vivien smiled. “Good.”

***

A week later the F-SEE grades were posted. All the students who had taken the test crowded around the bulletin board, trying to see if they passed, and where they had ranked among other students.

Gertie and Bridget were relieved to see that they both had P’s next to their names. Bridget was even high up on the list.

Then they saw who was at the top.

Ernest and the Nessing brothers were hanging out across the hallway by the water fountain, watching the crowd with amusement without even glancing at the list. Why would they? They knew what they got.

Gertie and Bridget strode over furiously, ready to let loose a verbal lashing. Ernest, at least, had the decency to look ashamed.

Before the sisters could start, Charlie managed to take all the wind out of their sails.

“Thanks for your help,” he said with a grin.