#'oh yeah itl calm down bfore bday' WRONG
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#its me#me bday#nothing beats waking up to severe cramps#combined with other fam member catching something and coughing the fuvk everywhere#bowels committed suicide the other day (regular occurrence) and i was so close actully fulfilling that#dead tired and pain n all that for a whole dam week#'oh yeah itl calm down bfore bday' WRONG#maybe i should fullfull what i didnt do 2 bdays ago. wouldnt that be great#the sheer dread in time passing and my empty life nonexperirence increasingly falling behind my ticking higher age number#existential dread ive had since primary school#only overshadowed by my body physically killing itself#what have i done up until now?#why am i still even here?#its like that.
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