#'if you think about it kanbaru's thing with araragi (if i got the number of syllables wrong kill me) is similar to how straight guys wanna | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

darkcherrymystery · 7 years ago

Text

Old Koyomi Reverse translations

(Very old.)

These 4 chapters are some of the first translation I ever attempted, but I made them private over at mirroredtranslations because I have no confidence in their quality (and have no plans to rework them). Still, I suppose they should have a small place here to rot away more publicly--at least, until someone comes along and takes up the task of translating Koyomi Reverse.

Here are chapters 13, 26, 27, and 30.

Chapter 13

Of course, I didn't know.

The knowledge that another name for 'snake' was 'kaka' was not needed for the entrance exam--I know it seems like I don't know when to give up if I say this, but it was just more evidence that the affair I was experiencing wasn't a dream.

If I were able to describe a sea snake with Shinobu Oshino's way of laughing, "Ka ka!", then perhaps that would be the root of my awareness of it; I might think that was related to the dream, but as might be expected, that kind of foreshadowing from my subconscious was just too forceful--anyway, the appearance of this "mirror specialist", whether it was a god, or a junior high school girl, was not something I'd wished for.

"Are you feeling peckish? Araragi-kun. If I heard you correctly, you haven't eaten anything since this morning. Let's talk as we eat. Here, together, with Kuchinawa-san."

Now that you mention it, the only thing I'd eaten all day was the tea that Oikura made for me--my stomach felt full just from seeing her new appearance, so I didn't really notice; but since my vampire attributes were disappearing now, if I didn't intake proper nutrition, I'd fall over soon.

Thus, for the first time, I was invited inside the shrine at North White Snake Shrine, and saw the meal Hachikuji-onee-san had prepared in front of me.

"...So these aren't the offerings, are they?"

"Mm. These are offerings."

"..."

There shouldn't be anyone other than me who worships at this shrine, so I wonder if Kuchinawa-san also has offerings... or rather, was he happy to eat offerings?

While I was hesitating, without saying 'Itadakimasu', Hachikuji-onee-san and Kuchinawa-san had started eating, so I couldn't help but partake of the meal lest I disturb the harmony of the situation.

I mean, it's not something I'll say again, but this was quite a situation--me, sitting in a circle with two gods, eating a meal.

What kind of person am I.

In the world I'd lived in until this morning, Nadeko Sengoku had stopped being a god, and Mayoi Hachikuji had become a god--in other words, the two of their reigns hadn't overlapped, but over here they were muddled together, and it didn't seem to make sense.

"Gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp." "Gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp."

It seemed both of the gods had received the same bottle of sake, and were drinking it straight from the bottle--setting aside the 21-year-old Hachikuji-onee-san, the image of Kuchinawa-san doing it despite looking like a junior high school girl left quite an impression.

"Koyomi-onii-chan--you think mirrors reflect left and right reversed, do you?"

The main point, Kuchinawa-san had suddenly gotten to--or rather, Kuchinawa-san had gotten straight to the point.

He spoke so abruptly that I fumbled my description... although she wasn't stuttering anymore, to have fumbled in front of Mayoi Hachikuji was embarrassing.

"U, um, what? Could you say that again?"

"Do you think that mirrors reflect left and right reversed?--is what I asked. Got it?"

He spoke belligerently, like we were doing a stressful interview--that didn't mean I didn't understand the substance of the question, but it was hard to infer its meaning.

Mirrors reflect left and right reversed--that's what I thought. Isn't that common knowledge even a grade schooler would know?

If the question were 'Why do you think mirrors reflect left and right reversed?', I'd be willing to answer wherever there was philosophical meaning implied; but that question was far from philosophical, it was like a Zen dialogue--was he intending to ask something like, 'What if our own lefts and rights are reversed, and what's reflected in the mirror is reality?'

No, wait.

Grade schoolers wouldn't know this, but scholarship students like Hitagi and Oikura should;(1) as a property of "mirrors", strictly speaking, it wasn't 'left and right' but rather 'front and back' that was reversed..., was that it? But, that's just an issue with how you say it; the fact that what you see--the 'reverse' of what you see--should be the same.

"I've heard that with three-sided mirrors and stuff, if you look at the seams between the mirrors when they make a right angle, left and right become correct, but... Is that what you want me to say?"

Or, was there a mirror that correctly reflected left and right even on a level surface, by cleverly utilizing the process of reflection... I don't know about the Rainy Devil in this world, but when I cleaned Kanbaru's room, I remember finding those kinds of promotional goods among all the novel and rare things she liked to keep.

"No, no--sha sha. That's not it; I said, when you glance into a mirror, do you think that left and right are reversed?"

"That is... what I think. If I raise my right hand, the mirror image raises its left hand; if I raise my left foot, the mirror image raises its right foot, right?"

"Really. Koyomi-onii-chan balances in the shape of a Y in front of his mirror? Weird, aren't you."

"It's just an example. I don't do that kind of thing."

Karen's the one who does that.

She probably still does it in this world.

"Anyway, the mirror image moves opposite to my left and right."

"You really think that?"

He's relentless.

Kuchinawa-san was really pressing me for an answer--I did have an impression of snakes as vindictive, but I felt like that image was being replicated in real life here.

"Don't you just think that because everyone says so?"

"Th-that's absurd. Do I look like a man tied down by common sense?"

However, the idea that mirrors reflect left and right reversed--or rather, front and back reversed--was certainly common sense; in other words, a preconceived notion.

For instance, when explaining the physical body known as a mirror, that's the way I would explain it after all--although I don't remember it, when someone explained mirrors to me, they probably explained it in the same way too.

So I understood.

'Ah, this is.'

'This is a metal board that reflects reality, but with left and right reversed.'

"...Kuchinawa-san, you're saying that's not actually the case? What do you think, Hachikuji-onee-san?"

"I'll mention my view at the end. For now, please continue with that line of conversation."

An onee-san speaking full of dignity.

Leader-like.

However, since I knew what she was like when she was 10, it was hard to decide whether she was speaking seriously or just joking around, or even disguising the fact that she didn't actually have a view.

"Did you know about cognition of mirroring? It's like, if an animal--for example, a snake, is shown itself in a mirror, whether or not it knows it's looking at itself. But since that partner in the mirror is reflected with its lefts and rights reversed, or in other words, when it pairs up with its partner in the mirror, do you think that it realizes it's looking at its 'own reflection'? If it makes it move the same direction, and it moves a different way, it thinks it's looking at a different guy--probably. Sha sha."

"...No, but, since the real left and right move in opposite directions..."

"In snakes' case, at any rate, since they don't have arms or legs, they can't understand your example, Koyomi-onii-chan. It's not like mirrors illuminate anything themselves in the first place; they reflect any light that enters, and in "being reflected", we judge the side we see as we wish. I think that's by no means a function of mirrors themselves."

"...Then, Kuchinawa-san."

Like I'm being toyed with--or rather, I started to feel like I'm being made fun of; forgetting that I was speaking with a god, I ended up inquiring in a bit of an emphatic tone.

"If it's not that mirrors reflect left and right reversed, then just what do they reflect?"

"Reality."

Kuchinawa-san said.

"...No, it's like you said before--'Which left and right is correct?'--isn't it, Koyomi-onii-chan? I'm talking about how mirrors came to be treated in ancient times--sacred spiritual tools."

"Uh... such and such about mirrors and stuff, I heard you."

"Cinderella's mother was someone who saw it."

Despite Hachikuji-onee-san's know-it-all face, she was mistaking Cinderella for Snow White--but, well, it was easy to understand as an example.

Now, this ended up being an inelegant analysis of the workings of a mirror, but since mirrors had once been a considerably mysterious "ghost image", of course we wanted to endow it with meaning--so, there must be a number of oddities associated with mirrors.

They reflect reality, hm...

"Because of that reflection of reality, Medusa ended up turned to stone--well, if I saw a guy with snakes for hair, I'd be surprised at that too. Sha sha!"

Kuchinawa-san laughing like that, it might be a snake joke of some kind, however, as I knew that snake-god Sengoku had taken that form, I couldn't laugh at all... in this world, that Sengoku didn't do that, right?

"They reflect reality--but, those words themselves imply a lot, Kuchinawa-san. Why did you say that? What kind of lesson should I take from that?"

'Lesson', it's like something that con man would say; but, at present, the impression I had was nothing more than 'It's good to reflect upon history.'

If things went badly, and the truth was really in the opposite direction, I wouldn't want to pick a fight--I had paid Hachikuji-onee-san 4 yen in her box, but her partner Kuchinawa-san had come here free of charge to make a friendly appearance, so I couldn't behave in such a rude way.

...Thinking about it now, to pay Hachikuji-onee-san only 4 yen as alms, it was almost the same amount of money as not paying her anything.

I suddenly felt really apologetic--although I felt it in my heart, I am sorry for getting involved so rudely.

"Aa--, I still don't know. Koyomi-onii-chan. From your view, both me and this world look reversed; I'm just saying it's not 'reversed' in the least--it's not about which left and right is correct, it's that both lefts and rights are correct."

"Eh...?"

Both of them are--correct?

That's reality?

"From your view, this world is preposterous and makes no sense, but your world is femalely lewd in the same way."

"Femalely lewd..."

Things had gotten a bit serious, but, no, I would not describe my world as femalely lewd.

"That was a mistake. I meant, 'equally construed'."(2)

"That kind of mistake is possible, is it... Don't confused 'construed' and 'lewd' when you talk. Those words come from opposite categories, don't they?"

"Not 'opposite'--sha sha."

Kuchinawa-san repeated it as if my foolish retort had some kind of deep meaning--huh?

"No, well, let's talk about all the people you know in this world. Your sisters, your friends, your kouhai, your childhood friend--and then, myself and Mayoi-onee-san; it's not like we've had our rights and lefts reversed at all. Somehow, you've come to understand that already, right?"

"..."

"Right, it's not that we've been reversed--we are indisputably ourselves. We're mirror images, not illusions--sha sha! You've been gazing at me all this time trying to read me, but the me that you know, Koyomi-onii-chan, is completely different from the me right now. Don't think for a second that we're the same person. I'm sorry, but, this is me."

Even if I'm Nadeko Sengoku.

Kuchinawa-san said.

In other words, Nadeko Sengoku said.

Dull as I was, I understood what he was trying to say--however, even so, it's hard for me to swallow right now.

That's my instinctive feeling.

The existences reflected in a mirror are the same exact people; and because they are the people themselves, that's fine for understanding Hanekawa and Black Hanekawa, but it's hard to agree that the same was true of all the other people.

Take the very first one I met, Karen, as an example--if her height were to get even lower, wouldn't her identity break down?

"I'm not saying that tall people don't necessarily wish to be tall--just, if there are people who have a complex about being short, then there are people who have a complex about being tall. Your little sister still just graduated junior high, right? She'll catch up to that height, since her inner substance is still growing up, right?"

"Inner substance...?"

No, well, having it said like that I understood; Karen's body will just grow bigger, and speaking of her inner substance right now, she's still not much more than a child, I think.

"..."

So, assuming that?

In Tsukihi's case--in Ononoki-chan's case--in Hachikuji's case--in Kanbaru's case--in Hanekawa's case--in Oikura's case--in Sengoku's case.

If I look at it from that point of view, with the "reversed left and right" that had looked so odd until now, there was finally one thing they had in common--but, assuming that?

"Sha sha. Now that we've put that in order, let's go back a bit to what we were talking about before, Koyomi-onii-chan. 'If you raise your right hand, your left hand moves, so the mirror is reflecting left and right reversed,' is what you said, Koyomi-onii-chan--but that example can't be used by snakes, who have no arms or legs. In a snake's case, how should it imagine the idea of 'left and right reversed'?"

How would you do it?

How would you explain a mirror's 'left and right reversed' to me?

"I would use... the shape of its scales, or the way they line up..."

"Don't seriously think about it like a snake, idiot. The point is, how would you explain 'left and right reversed' to a guy with no concept of 'left and right'?"

"That's..."

This seems like a different pattern than in the Ozma Problem.(3)

It seems easy, but it's surprisingly difficult.

For instance, even if you moved to your right with all your whole body, your mirrored partner moves to their left--however, the crux of the problem is, how to explain 'left and right reversed' without using the words 'left and right', right?

"You say 'the Ozma Problem', but it seems more like 'the Wizard of Oz Problem', doesn't it?"

Said Hachikuji-onee-san, who I'd momentarily forgotten about (I'd decided in my mind not to give a reply, but given the situation I seemed like quite a coldhearted guy); I got worried for a little bit, then I thought about it more, and reached an easy way to answer.

"That's right. I should reflect writing."

"Sha sha. Writing."

"Aah. Since there are a lot of letters in the alphabet that are symmetrical, hiragana, katakana, or kanji would be better, right? If I reflect some of that writing, the characters will be reflected with their lefts and rights reversed, so I can use that to explain the nature of a mirror."

"Koyomi Araragi" will be reflected as "igararA imoyoK".

"Kuchinawa-san" will be reflected as "nas-awanihcuK"--it'll be that so-called "mirror writing" that frustrated me at the bookshop.

Looking at it like that, it'll be easy to tell at a glance that you're not just looking at glass, that it's not just reflecting reality.

"Indeed."

'That's it,' Kuchinawa-san said.

From that facial expression, it didn't look like he was going to say, "Correct! You're smarter than I thought, Koyomi-onii-chan!", but rather, "Finally managed to come up with an answer I wanted, really took your goddamn time, didn't you"--but if that were the case, please, teach me the entire answer with some kind of bullet point list, will you?

As a god, there might be some kind of god rule about not being able to give me a very direct choice, but I remembered what it was like when Oshino gave me an extensive knowledge of oddities in that ruined cram school; now being informed about mirrors and such, and on top of that seeing Kuchinawa-san making that kind of face at me, it's too painful.

...Come to think of it, that ruined cram school no longer exists from my view of the world, but what happened to it in the world on this side?

From what I'd seen until now, it seemed like there were no changes in buildings or scenery other than the design being reversed, but...

"Well then, Koyomi-onii-chan. The next step is...?"

"...Didn't it already happen?"

"Don't worry, this is the last--if this is the end, let's hear Mayoi-onee-chan's opinion."

"Eh?"

Mayoi Hachikuji said like she were surprised, sounding like Kuchinawa-san--as if she forgot what she said herself just before.

If that were the case, then as I thought, it was just a trick to buy time.

Anyway, now is the time for Kuchinawa-san's next--last step.

"If a brand new situation happened to you right now, and you didn't see the 'igararA imoyoK' reflected in the mirror; if you were only able to see the 'igararA imoyoK' letters you wrote on the paper, what would you think?"

"...? Am I in the role of the snake? Is it alright that my intelligence isn't the same as a snake's?"

"Mhm. Don't try to overstretch yourself, now."

That was a cruel thing to say--no, I suppose as a god of snakes, it's natural that Kuchinawa-san would take the snake's side.

Uum.

"Well, even if it is mirror writing, I'd think it were normal, wouldn't I."

"But, you don't know about the mirror. So of course, you don't know about mirror writing."

"...? Then, I wouldn't think it was mirror writing, but, since it's just that I don't know the word for it, in the end, I'd still think it was 'left and right reversed'--"

Hm.

No, that's wrong.

The idea that mirror writing was 'left and right reversed' was only what I would think in a normal situation in front of a mirror--I thought about how I tried to read the history textbook with great effort, at that large-scale bookstore I mentioned earlier.

That's it.

Since the pages were all reversed, I tried to hold them up to the light--that endeavor failed, but what it comes down to is, when I looked at the mirror writing printed on the paper...

I'm sure I turned the paper to its opposite side.

And.

Mirrors don't reverse left and right--

"They turn people--to their opposite side."

I understood.

I understood something for the first time since coming to this world--this wasn't the "mirror country". No; although that was completely correct as a way to comprehend it, the girls I'd seen, had certainly not been turned around so their lefts and rights were reversed.

The girls were--turned to their opposite side.

Their hidden side has become their front side.

So that's the reason why Tsukihi was the only one without a transformation, except for her clothes--no, even considering her clothes; while I might be mistaken as usual, anyway, as I thought, it was because she was that kind of person.

She was a person with neither a front nor an opposite side--even inside of a mirror, Tsukihi Araragi's hidden face doesn't come out.

Indeed.

This place did more than just reflect people; it showed their other side.

FOOTNOTES (1) 'Grade schooler' and 'scholarship student' are homonyms in Japanese, both pronounced 'shougakusei'. (2) '痴女立って’ is pronounced like 'chijodatte'. '秩序だって' is pronounced 'chitsujodatte'. 'Chijo' means 'female pervert' and 'chitsujodatte' means 'put in order/organized'. I tried my best with this weird pun. (3) A famous pop science book by Martin Gardner, The Ambidextrous Universe, contains a chapter called "The Ozma Problem", which follows a number of faulty possibilities for communicating the concept of left and right with a hypothetical alien species, where the communicators are unable to view an object in common.

Chapter 26

“Don't give me that bullshit I'll kill you you goddamn idiot--"

After explaining the situation to Ononiki-chan, I'd been cursed at with some very naughty words--in the other world and in this world, it was the first time I'd received such a harsh degree of abuse from Ononoki-chan.

She was barely managing to preserve her expressionless monotone, but if she were the same Ononoki-chan who originally lived in this world, she'd have put on far from a posed look.

"There was really someone who got in the bath with you, was there. A married woman no less. A widow--"

"No, she wasn't a widow..."

If she were a ghost, then both she and her husband were already dead.

In the first place, since the word "widow" was an idiom with an element of sexism in it, you had to be careful how you used it--though if both people are the same gender, it could be used for things like the Oath of the Peach Garden, or inseparable friendship too.(1, 2)

After finally leaving the Kanbaru household, we had moved to Namishiro Park--there was no real reason to go to Namishiro Park, but since this was where I'd gone after escaping the Rainy Devil yesterday, we were just following the same pattern.

I'd left through the garden after getting out of the bath, riding my bicycle through the middle of Kanbaru and Ononoki-chan's battle, and when Ononoki-chan signaled with,

"Unlimited Rulebook--,"

We flew away.

I could see from how much the Rainy Devil was ripping its raincoat to shreds that it appeared not to have taken significant damage.

It seemed Ononoki-chan had magnificently succeeded in her mission to "not injure her opponent, but only to fight with the goal of taking up time"--that's a professional for you.

But, even as an amateur, I'd done my best--in the square of the park, I told her about the apparition experience I'd had in the cypress bath--which was immediately followed by jeering.

"Dear me..., it feels like I'm scolding a cat trying to be praised by its master by delivering me a rat that it caught."

"It's not that kind of a good thing."

"But that reference was a good one..."

If it were me, since I'm not very good with cats, I'd be quite shocked to see myself represented as a cat in my example.

"And what about me representing myself as your master. Would that go against being fair and equitable I wonder... From onee-san's perspective it'd look like you've become servant to a shikigami, devil-boy."

"'Servant to a shikigami'... That sounds so formal. I don't want to become one of Kagenui-san's underlings..."

As we were talking, I looked around the park--fortunately, there were no witnesses, so to speak, to watch the back-and-forth between me and Ononoki-chan.

I'd stayed in the bath for a long time, and as a result, it had become afternoon--since I was planning to visit North White Snake Shrine once again when night came, somehow it seemed I was going to take one more action before then.

"But Ononoki-chan. I think we should go to, Na O E Tsu Hi Gh Sch Ool... Naoetsu High School next, but what do you think..."(3)

"Hmm... Well, if we have no other leads, that's all we can do, right? But, speaking honestly about how I feel, I'm a bit reluctant to follow Gaen-san's sister's advice."

'How I feel', and, 'reluctant', and such.

For some reason those didn't seem like words Ononoki-chan would use.

"It's not advice--I think. She did say she wasn't giving me advice--this was something like a suggestion, or a hint... It seems like the kind of hint that it's fine whether we use it or not."

Though if I think back, that wasn't exactly her line, was it--just like Oshino drew a line at helping people, Tooe-san also, however much intentionally, placed a restriction on using that rule-breaking talent of hers.

That was the impression I got.

"You say 'this', devil-boy. But you still haven't shown me that stigma yet."

"Eh? Show you? Are you asking me to take off my clothes here? That'd be a little embarrassing..."

"Why are you getting bashful in front of a single person, devil-boy? In the first place your story seems like a lie, and it's not like I can trust you if you don't show me. Aren't you just making up vague excuses for not being able to find anything?"

"Th, that's absurd. There's no way I'm the kind of guy to conceal my own ineptitude by doing something like that."

I shook my head.

While I was thinking about that, it must be connected to the development of having my back washed by a married woman.

"Yes, turn around."

Ononoki-chan spoke like a doctor--it felt strange to hear her go from a doll to a doctor.

She rolled up my shirt.

"Oy, look at this."

"Eh? What? That tone, that line, what?"

"It's nothing. Just a nice muscular back."

"You're complementing my back muscles... seriously?"

"Seriously."

"That's..."

You can try to twist your neck around, but of course, you can't see your own back... but there's no way Ononoki-chan failed to notice those magnificent welts.

Come to think of it, the pain disappeared at some point... when I looked into the mirror in the bathroom, I was unsure whether the scars from those claws would properly disappear, but it seems Tooe-san took that into consideration for me.

However, if she did take it into consideration for me, it was a bit too fast for the pain to have disappeared...

"N, no, it did happen, from before. It was written on my back, 'Na O E Tsu Hi Gh Sch Ool', in katakana, in mirror letters..."

"Dear me. Desperate, aren't you. Desperate, like a boy who can't back out of his lies about having a cute pen pal."

"Please stop using examples from an elementary school romantic comedy, it's not a good gag. This is the truth, Ononoki-chan, look at these eyes of mine! Do these eyes look like eyes that could tell a lie!?"

"This is the first time I've met someone who would actually say that line. This isn't a manga, so there's nothing I could learn from looking at your eyes. That's just a staring contest. Like Appuppu."(4)

"Look at these pupils of mine then!"

"Showing me your pupils is even more suspicious. I'm not an optometrist. At any rate, it would have been nice if this was written in kanji."

"Don't talk scary like that!"

I wouldn't endure the pain of writing in kanji!

"Tsu" particularly would be hell!(5)

"Mm. With this, can you believe me, Ononoki-chan? This adventure of mine was unfurling at the same time you were fighting with the Rainy Devil, Ononoki-chan."

"I'm really not sure if you should call it an adventure, but... well, if you're going to lie, you should come up with something better than this."

"Eh? Are you angry?"

"I misspoke. If you were lying, you would come up with something better... is what I was trying to say. I suppose my real opinion slipped out there."

"If that's your real opinion, now it's your official stance, then..."

"In any case, we don't have any other ideas, do we... so what bothers me is that advice... The one who gave you the hint was Gaen-san's older sister. If it wasn't her, even I wouldn't be making a fuss."

"..."

Although it was the same way in the other world, Tooe Gaen did not go by that name.

My first impression upon meeting her was, well, like that, those kinds of feelings, but... even bearing that mind, it's not like I especially wanted to proceed to Naoetsu High School.

Or rather, if it were possible to avoid, I didn't want to go.

It was a place I thought I'd never go again--how could I possibly march back into the alma mater where I'd performed a dogeza in the staff room at the graduation ceremony?(6)

But, judging from the time it should already be after school.

...If that's the case, there shouldn't be many people inside. Speaking of chances, this was a chance to sneak in, but... even if I was an Old Boy, I'd graduated, and if an outsider like me were to sneak in, I'm afraid they'd get very upset (it would be great if all they did was get upset).

"That's right... As far as that's concerned, setting myself aside, Ononoki-chan, you'd really stand out..."

"That's true, no matter where I go, my cuteness ends up getting me attention."

"..."

That's not what I meant; what I meant was, if there was a little girl inside a high school, no matter how unpleasant, she'd stand out... Even making a joke, it didn't seem like a joke Ononoki-chan would make; as I thought, there must be some differences between this Ononoki-chan and the Ononoki-chan I knew.

I wanted to think that the fact she got truly angry before was one of those variations--now then, whatever she was thinking about,

"That's it. So, let's split up,"

Ononoki-chan proposed.

"You won't get tangled up with the Rainy Devil, or in other words, if we're not worried about having to battle it, there's no need for me to accompany you, devil-boy. While you're going to Naoetsu High School, devil-boy, I'll take a different route by myself."

"A different route?"

"Yeah. Well, I just thought of it now, but..., I don't want to do what Gaen-san's sister says, but after thinking about how there's no excuse not to go to Naoetsu High School, I finally thought of this, but..."

"If you go that far, it's not about warning me, you just don’t like her, do you. How much do you not want to go to Naoetsu High School..."

"I'll go after Black Hanekawa."

She said.

"'Go after', or rather 'search for'..., because I have a big guess as to why Black Hanekawa saved you, devil-boy. I'll try to resolve it."

"D, do you have any ideas about where to go?"

"No, but, well, it'd be careless to say I won't find her because I have no ideas right now. It's not bad to search for a cat now and again. Feels like detective work."

"Well..."

As a reason for refusing Tooe-san's hint, it was perfectly valid--I don't know what I might find at Naoetsu High School, but if we could contact Black Hanekawa, that would be an unmistakably large advance in progress.

If we were able to find her, it would be very hard to get any information out of her, but... I really wanted to know who asked her to come save me.

"And then, well, I think it might end up a fool's errand, but before that I think I'll visit Shinobu again."

"Mm... I'd be worried about that if I were you. Will you be alright?"

"I never thought the day would come when I'd make you worry."

"So why is it odd-couple comedy? Why are your only two choices either odd-couple comedy or elementary school romance? There isn't enough variation in your references."

"I'll be alright. You saw, didn't you? It's hard for Shinobu's aura to affect me... it's almost as if it's hard for it to affect me, but it's not like it'll never affect me; well, it'd be better for me to go than you, devil-boy. I might be able to hear the continuation of what she was saying when I cut her off... That powerfully, unexpectedly selfish princess will probably insist 'I won't speak with anyone but the man himself'--that's why last night, I woke you up at midnight, devil-boy--but this time I'll try to do some kind of reverse dogeza."

"I see, sorry about that. To make you lower your head for my sake... wait, what's a reverse dogeza?"

"You bend your whole body backward, a mysterious kind of retroflexion."

"Just who are you to take that kind of arrogant pose in front of a princess?... How well do you think that'll go? You say you have no ideas about where to go, and that it'll end up a wild goose chase, but if what you're doing seems like it'll have a better chance of success than going to Naoetsu High School, I should go too..."

"Don't forget the idea you were thinking of, that it's just that I don't want to go to that Naoetsu High School... If I accompanied you here, after thanking me I'd have to accompany you back to Naoetsu High School, wouldn't I."

Even if you always say that.

Just how much do you hate Tooe-san?

"For that reason, I thought it seemed hard for me to accompany you all the way, devil-boy. Your lack of mobility will just get in the way in pursuing Black Hanekawa, and you'll just dry up if you visit Shinobu... How about it, has it been settled now?"

"It's settled."

A well-reasoned argument.

'I won't do it because I don't want to do it'; I want to use that method of reasoning--this wasn't an excuse, but if I were to compare this with meeting the alternate Kanbaru's mother, who wasn't reflected in the surface of the bathwater, and receiving a message on my back as we were bathing together, as I'd reported, it's definitely something of more uncertain meaning.

"Well then, in about three hours, we'll meet here and head to North White Snake Shrine. Or rather, it'd be better to meet here and use my 'Unlimited Rulebook' to jump over there, so we can use every minute of our time effectively until then. Devil-boy will go gather firewood at Naoetsu High School, and I'll go put Black Hanekawa and Shinobu in the laundry."

"If you were trying to add more references to the pattern, you've failed. I have no idea what those mean, do I. ...Well, I don't think there's any danger in my direction, so be careful, Ononoki-chan. Setting aside Shinobu, Black Hanekawa is plenty dangerous in this world. She uses Energy Drain and stuff."

"Energy Drain doesn't really mean anything to me. Because I'm a corpse, you know."

"Oh, is that so. I didn't know."

"Speaking of danger, I do think your way is more dangerous, devil-boy--there shouldn't be any battles, but if you move according to Gaen-san's sister's instructions, I don't think you'll get through uneventfully--I think something will happen."

"..."

Honestly, I wouldn't go so far as to say I had a sense of impending danger, but..., for Ononoki-chan to give such a warning, there must be something about Tooe-san.

But if I look at that powerful warning from another angle, it could be taken as powerful acknowledgement--if she says there will be no battles, there must be some value in going by myself.

"If that's the case, I wonder if it'd be better to change into my school unform as soon as I get home...? So I can act like a high school student."

I was going to once more put on a uniform I never thought I'd wear again... Since Oikura went out with my sisters, I shouldn't encounter her when I returned to our room.

"You're right. Well then, I'll see you off. Since I'm deeply sorry for abandoning you like this, I'll at least do that much."

"If I could, I wouldn't have you do anything that'd make you deeply sorry for abandoning me, but..."

Well, that was just something to do with Ononoki-chan and Gaen-san's relationship, and she was originally collaborating with me out of kindness.

Despite knowing how frightening Black Hanekawa was, I said, "Well then, I'll just ask you to see me off," once again, ending the briefing, and switched my awareness over to the next topic.

But this time, I came to grips with Ononoki-chan's misgivings, deeper, heavier than before--I had absolutely no idea how frightening Tooe Gaen might be.

Following her instructions, I was heading for Naoetsu High School--I had struggled through numerous apparition cases where I'd barely escaped alive, but nevertheless, this was something I'd never before experienced: my hair standing on end, as I went to confront my greatest fear.

Footnotes (1) The word Ononoki-chan used for "widow", 未亡人 (miboujin), literally means "not-dead-yet-person", so you can see the issue with its history as a term for "widow". (2) A fictional event in the Three Kingdoms period of China where three commanders met together and became "sworn brothers", which is often used as a "symbol of fraternal loyalty". (3) Tooe's ghost scratched the katakana for "Na O E Tsu Ko U Ko U" onto his back in the previous chapter. (4) Appuppu is a series of Japanese children's picture books where the reader has staring contests with the illustrations. (5) The 'tsu' kanji in 'Naoetsu' is 津, which has 9 strokes. (6) A dogeza is a bow executed by touching one’s head to the floor whilst prostrated on one’s knees; it’s the highest form of deference in etiquette

Chapter 27

...Having said that, that 'fear' and 'confrontation' weren't at the place Tooe-san had sent me, Naoetsu High School.

They had to do with the process of going there.

Once I arrived at the Araragi household after being transported by Ononoki-chan, I encountered a dreadful situation in Koyomi's Room--er, rather, Koyomi & Sodachi's Room.

If I thought about this as preparing your equipment before a boss fight, or refilling your recovery items, it felt like I'd gotten a Game Over from being attacked by the owner of the weapons shop--no, as I'd said before, although I'm very sorry to any Oikura fans who like to see her go through bad experiences, she wasn't there.

She had gone out shopping, happily, with Karen and Tsukihi--there was no one at the Araragi household, and as far as that was concerned I was glad.

That put me in high spirits.

The problem was me, opening my own closet, continuing from the Kanbaru household, finding the clothes in which to execute my sneaking mission into Naoetsu High School--that is to say, it was what happened when I tried to take out my school uniform.

My school uniform wasn't there.

Huh? Did I already throw it out, I wonder? That'd be foolish...

Or rather, maybe it got mixed up in Oikura's closet. But, even if we'd been living in the same room practically like family for so long, I didn't want to barge into her closet without asking... As I was thinking that, I was checking each suit of clothing hanging in my closet in order from the start, and sure enough, I found it.

No.

What I found was not my school uniform.

I don't know, if I were to speak of school uniforms, since the image in my mind is of that so-called stand-up collar of the boys' uniform I'd worn my third year, "that" didn't seem to have the culture of a school uniform, but "this" just might really be a school uniform--at least, it was clothing a student would wear, so I couldn't at all rule out the idea that it was a school uniform.

A sailor blouse. A skirt.

"That" might be what girls call a school uniform--but, I don’t think the hard problem that arises from this is what to call it.

"...I see, I see."

So that's what it is.

So this is what it is.

Er, if this world is not "left and right reversed" but rather "turned to the other side"--like Tsubasa Hanekawa had turned into Black Hanekawa, Koyomi Araragi would be Ougi Oshino, and if this was her daily existence, this would be normal, right--it would be expected that a uniform for men would become a uniform for women.

I've heard stories about novice major leaguers having cosplay prepared for them in the locker room as part of their initiation, but this could be some kind of initiation as a stranger in this "mirror country"--until now it's just been jeans and T-shirts, and a parka, what I'd call my everyday appearance, so I hadn't realized it, but somehow, with this, I could say it's been settled that the "Koyomi Araragi" of this world was "Ougi Oshino".

Sharing a room with Oikura, bathing together with Tooe-san, those kinds of things that hadn't really made sense, seemed like a paradox... no, about Tooe-san, I thought it was just to do with her personality, but Oikura opening her heart to me, flirting with me, if it were originally the case that her partner was a girl, I could understand it after all.

When she was changing, I'd been sent out of the room, but on the first day she jokingly invited me into the bath too...

"Ku..."

I gritted my teeth.

No choice but to wear it... although the series has continued for so long avoiding just this. 'Just this'. It might be that I've been caught up in the moment, but I'm different; little girls, and mature women, and toothbrushes; I've done a lot of stuff, but still, I didn't think I'd ever do this sort of thing. I had thought I was the type to just talk about it and nothing else.

A speaker of nonsense, a siscon junior high schooler, a swordless swordsman, a legendary hero and such;(1) I had thought I was a different breed from those kinds of protagonists, but it seems that I also do this kind of variety.

I've got it, if that's how it is then I won't brood over it.

Let's get these clothes on, and smoothly proceed forward.

We're pressed for time in the remaining pages. My reluctance to not be reluctant to do this is at its maximum.

I was going to wear a girls' uniform to Naoetsu High School--if that was going to make sense; I've always said I have a small build, but Ougi-chan and my sizes should be completely different--but the uniform fit me perfectly, as it it were made to order.

It might have really been made to order.

Fortunately, thus far in my adventures, I'd had many opportunities to come in contact with girls' clothing, so it wasn't that I didn't know how to wear it--since the lefts and rights are reversed between putting clothes on someone and putting them on yourself, it took me some time, but I got the form correct.

I was lucky that Ougi-chan belonged to the stockings faction; I lacked fashion sense, but as one of my few hangups, I didn't really like having my legs naked. Stockings are certainly less unseemly than bare legs for a man.

All right, costume change complete.

I had intended to head right back after changing into my uniform, but it ended up taking longer than I'd thought--I quickly descended the staircase and left the Araragi house through the back.

I didn't look in a mirror.

I didn't want to see.

Since I'd been unwisely letting my hair grow out, I'd really look serious about this.

When I left the house, I didn't think clothes could make me feel this uneasy--well, it wasn't simply feeling uneasy about wearing something for the first time, I was dumbfounded at how little protection a skirt offered.

You have to watch out whenever the wind blows.

Thinking about how girls went about their high school lives with this kind of 'armor', I couldn't help but respect them--I especially wanted to apologize to Hanekawa.

But right now, this wasn't a case of me showing understanding of Scottish culture--anyway, straddling the BMX bike (when you sit in this kind of saddle with a skirt, you need to be careful; this was the first time I knew that--if I hadn't had this opportunity, I probably wouldn't have known it. Indeed, it's just as Tooe-san said; whether you know it or don't know it, that doesn't matter--what's important is understanding it), I started pedaling toward Naoetsu High School.

Never again--well, even though that would actually be an exaggeration, at least, it's been a long time, and I hadn’t thought I’d take this route to school again, but I never expected to have to take it now.

I especially didn't expect to have to take it while wearing a girls' uniform; but, well, no matter what I was wearing, this wasn't my school route anymore.

Thinking about that, it's a little sad.

No matter what happens, whether I'm wearing a boys' uniform or a girls' uniform, whether I ride a bicyle or walk, I'm not a high school student anymore.

I have no titles.

Wherever I am, even if I might be in a parallel world--since indulging in that kind of reverie while pedaling a bicycle is dangerous, I deliberately switched my awareness over.

Thinking about it having switched over, I thought there was something a little strange--that's right, it's not a little, it's extremely strange.

It's suspicious.

If I'm under the impression that the Koyomi Araragi of this world is Ougi-chan, then I could accept without any uneasiness that her uniform was for girls, but if that's the reason why, then all of her clothes should be for girls.

Jeans, T-shirts, my parka, and pajamas were all, well, mens'--which I just now understood, though I'd overlooked the question of underwear.

It would defy logic if I hadn't noticed if all of my clothes had become women's last night when I got out of the bath.

At the point where I'd put on Ougi-chan's panties, or, at the point when I'd put on her bra, I should have realized--so what's going on with this?

Of course, in this world, it's more mistaken to search for logic than to not--since it was impossible for me to fit precisely into Ougi-chan's place, it would be better to not try to seriously make sense of it; however, I think it might be better if I thought this over.

Why then--because it's the opposite.

Because it's inside out.

Thinking about the examples of Ononoki-chan, Oikura and Shinobu, the "true shape" of the bizarre sensation started to clear up.

For instance, Ononoki-chan had perceived some kind of strange, bad feeling from me when I appeared from another world, and tried to deal with it by restructuring herself--I'll say again, she's a girl who could do some outrageous things--anyway, by doing so, she had moved closer to the Ononoki-chan I knew.

Oikura, having come into contact with the me from another world, who didn't know our daily life together, grew worried about the discrepancies between us--since she had always been smart, she might be gradually realizing the truth of the situation.

Even Shinobu was talking about how her memories of "Koyomi Araragi" in this world had grown vague--the general knowledge inside of her could be getting replaced by my general knowledge.

That's the bad influence facing this world.

The bad influence I was bringing as an alien element--just, isn't it strange how yesterday, all of my clothes were still my own, but today, they've become Ougi-chan's?

Hasn't the vector turned the opposite way?

Yesterday, wearing Ougi-chan's underwear, today, if I was wearing Ougi-chan's uniform, it's probable that the direction of the transformation vector has changed--just, if my uniform had become a skirt...

"..."

I thought that it's strange enough that I can't over look it--but I also thought that much of a paradox was more or less alright.

That it doesn't really matter.

For a guy who had bathed together with the mother of a kouhai to suddenly start complaining and making a fuss, it really lacks persuasiveness if I say so myself--it was already difficult to say I was taking an action that made any sense.

Yeah, that's it.

In other words--I was in the process of becoming Ougi-chan...?

It's not just the clothes; from this point on, that manner of... how to put this, rather than say 'bad personality', would I end up becoming a girl with a disagreeable personality?

That's absurd, I think; on the other hand, it was certainly a possibility--or rather, it was quite reasonable, somehow.

The temperature moves from high to low.

Therefore, since the bad influence I was bringing from the other world was high--even so, whatever influence a single drop of hot water brings to a pool full of cold water was, after all, insignificant.

In the blink of an eye.

I'd become one with the cold water.

I'd become simple water.(2)

If that's the case, like Shinobu said--as soon as possible, really as soon as possible, I need to return to my original world.

If I don't--I lose.

And then, I vanish.

Whatever kind of me I am now, I'm losing it.

I'll die.

Like when I graduated, I lost my titles.

Koyomi Araragi will disappear.

That was what made my hair stand on end. That's my greatest fear.

Footnotes: (1) These are cheeky references to protagonists in other Nisioisin series: Zaregoto, Katanagatari, etc. (2) This is in reference to a Gaen-ism, "If you can't become medicine, become poison. Otherwise you're just water."

Chapter 30

Surprisingly, she was there.

"Yo, you're late, aren't you--I'm thoroughly tired of waiting, Araragi-senpai."

Greeting me with a line just like her uncle's.

Ougi Oshino.

Ougi-chan.

A first year at Naoetsu High School, my kouhai--

Talking the same way as her uncle, that is, Meme Oshino, might be revenge for yesterday--if that's the case, it would start to look very appropriate.

As expected of a relative of his.

Which she is.

"Or I should say, what's with that appearance? Please, stop cosplaying as me, or whatever that is."

"You say that, but aren't you cosplaying as me...?"

I returned the question--Ougi-chan was wearing a Naoetsu High School uniform, or in other words, a boys' uniform. Looking like that, she was sitting on top of a desk.

A desk from Year 1 Class 3.

However, it wasn't the current Year 1 Class 3--nor was it even the real Year 1 Class 3. It wasn't the classroom I'd used when I'd enrolled, or the classroom used by the class after that--it was none of those.

Before Ougi-chan had transferred, she and I had gotten lost, and then had been locked away, in a spectral classroom we could see from a rough sketch did not originally exist in Naoetsu High School--the ghost of Year 1 Class 3.

If I have to say it.

The place where it all started between Koyomi Araragi and Ougi Oshino--

"Well, 'this' is simply a joke. And 'that' was also simply a joke..."

Ougi-chan said, looking strange.

Her cheeks were bulging, as if she was trying not to burst out laughing--was my cosplay guise really so amusing?

"Has nobody quipped anything at you so far? Or was it more like people going along with the joke? Araragi-senpai--even if it was the case that your uniform was switched with mine, there was absolutely no need to come wearing that."

"Ah."

"No, not 'Ah'. Good grief, you really are a fool, aren't you--well, that is part of your charm after all. Don't you worry, nothing cruel will happen from now on."(1)

We’re still not out of this yet, though...

While thinking that, I looked around for my seat, or rather the seat I'd used at the time, and sat down. This was different from when I was here with Ougi last; I could confirm it by looking at the clock, which, despite the left to right reversal, was still ticking--it looked like it hadn't stopped since it had started moving again after that ordeal.

But for nobody else to be here except for the two of us, it was the same as that time--or would it be better to say just the one of us?

Since Ougi-chan was my other self.

Since she was my shadow, a copy of myself--myself reflected in a mirror.

Ougi Oshino--in other words,

She's my partner.

"Mm, huh? Isn't that strange?"

"Oh? What is, Araragi-senpai? There isn't anything strange here."

Ougi-chan tilted her head to the side.

Like she did when feigning ignorance.

"No... I'd thought that you were the Koyomi Araragi of this world, so..., you weren't here, so I'm becoming more like you, because of the pressure from the world, but..., if you're here, then why did my uniform change into a girl's one?"

I'd been thinking about it like: somehow, this world's Ougi-chan--in other words, this world's "Koyomi Araragi", had been switched with the me from my original world, but if she's here, was that not it?

No, I don't know whether Ougi-chan would say it like this, but since it was beyond the scope of this world, it might be possible for there to be two or even three of us... one going to my original world, one remaining here...

"You're thinking a lot, Araragi-senpai--so you're probaby overthinking it. Black Hanekawa-san should have relayed that to you."

"Huh... relayed? Black Hanekawa? What does that--"

What it means was nothing more than this.

The one who had made the request to rescue me to that cat was Ougi-chan--at any rate, once I thought about her as myself, I could understand it without room for doubt.

Until now, I hadn't considered that possibility, because Hanekawa and Ougi-chan didn't get along at all, but if it's the case that their worldviews had been turned to the opposite side, there would be room for that kind of cooperation.

"Overthinking, hm. I might be. But not thinking would be unwise, right? I have to think moderately, to understand moderately--"

"That's Tooe-san's view, is it not? However, answering according to reason has its limits--though that's just what I would say."(2)

Ougi said, grinning broadly.

A smile knowing no bounds.

"No, please relax, Araragi-senpai. This is the finish line. There are no more destinations after this--hey, Araragi-senpai."

"What is it?"

I answered, cautiously.

If she was going to check my answers from now on, I'd have to be cautious--the meaning of those words I'd heard over and over until now, 'Find your partner', could be more like 'Find the culprit'.

The theory that this was Ougi-chan's premature revenge hadn't really been refuted--what was starting now might not be the explanation of the riddle, but the confession of the culprit.

"Didn't you think it would all turn out to be a dream?"

"Eh? Well, that's..."

It looked like I'd missed the timing for being cautious, hearing that; it was a bit of a letdown for me--was I just pretending or something?

"I... did think that. Not just once. ...I mean, is there anyone who wouldn't think that in this situation? Reasoning doesn't make sense, it's full of paradoxes, it's a world that ignores the relationship between cause and effect... It's called a lucid dream, right? Even now, I'm thinking that it's just a dream."

"That's right. Mixed bathing with Kanbaru-senpai's mother, wearing my uniform, they're certainly things you'd dream about."

"No, don't talk about those things like they're my desires..."

"Living together cheerfully like that with Oikura-san, after seeing her worn-out, thin, meager state, didn't you think that was also something you wanted to see?"

"'Oikura-san's worn-out, thin, meager state'..."(3)

It was the first time I'd met someone to put that idiom into practical use.

Well, it was actually me, but..., those were still words that fit Oikura more than anything.

"But if it was just a dream, there's something lacking about that explanation... things happened that there's no way I wished for, and there were plenty of things I didn't know."

"Fu fu fu. But, is that so. There's actually no evidence that things you don't know don't come out in a dream. People even have nightmares--"

"I thought that too, but..., well then, are you saying that this world is my dream after all? That I'm sleeping in my bed, and still haven't been woken up? That I'm unable to get up if I'm not woken up by my sisters?"

"Or, on the way home from the graduation ceremony, riding my BMX in high spirits, you got into a traffic accident like Hachikuji-chan and Tooe-san, and now you're in the hospital, in the middle of wandering the boundary between life and death--this is your dream on the verge of death--"

"..."

"Well, if something like that happened, there's no way Shinobu-san wouldn't save you, right. This is what's called overthinking."

My example of it, Ougi-chan said.

Same as ever, she was a girl whose statements were clear, but it was a mystery what she was trying to say--that this was my partner, and that she was still my other self, it was a little hard to accept.

I had a newfound appreciation for how Hanekawa had accepted Black Hanekawa.

"Well then, how about this. Though, typical of Ougi-chan, it's a perfectly plausible explanation."

"What is it? If that's the case then let's hear it all out."

"It's all right, even without that kind of determination, this is the final explanation--Araragi-senpai. Two years ago from now, in this classroom, your relationship with Sodachi Oikura broke down, correct?"

"Mhm..."

Well, she'd been a childhood friend, but that, more than anything that happened previously, was what had made our relationship break down--the final blow was on that day, when that happened.

"Yeah, yeah. And one year ago from now, you met Kiss-Shot Acerola-Orion Heart-Under-Blade during spring vacation--and lots of things happened after that. You connected with Hanekawa-senpai, you fell in love with Senjougahara-senpai, you made friends with Mayoi-chan, you hung out with Kanbaru-senpai, you renewed your old friendship with Sengoku-chan--my uncle and Yozuru Kagenui, Deishuu Kaiki and Yotsugi Ononoki, Tadatsuru Teori, and Seishirou Shishirui; you've encountered many names and many situations, haven't you."

"...So what? Are we doing a summary now? The graduation ceremony is over, so are you saying we're making a signature registry now? Or are we all signing the fancy paper?"(4)

"If,"

Ougi-chan said, ignoring my frivolous jokes--presenting me the final explanation.

"If all of that were a dream, what would you do?"

Not the current story.

If the entire story until this one--has been just a dream.

Footnotes (1) "Good grief, you really are a fool" (mattaku, oroka desu nee) is one of Ougi's favorite lines for Koyomi. (2) Koyomi used the word 理解 (rikai) for "understand" in the line before this, so Ougi says 「理による解には」(ri ni yoru kai ni wa), breaking the word into its parts which mean, respectively, 'reason/logic' and 'unravel/answer/explain'. (3) "Worn-out, thin, meager state" here is my best translation of the expression 地獄から火を取りに来たような (jigoku kara hi wo tori ni kita you na), which literally means something like "looking like you came taking the fires from hell". (4) 色紙 (shikishi/irogami) is fancy colored cardboard paper used for autographs and poetry and such.

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polaristranslations · 4 years ago

Text

Shinobu Mustard Episode 4

028

"Kanbaru. Do you mind becoming a slave for tonight? Also, lend me your house."

"All right!"

Second slave, secured.

"Oikura. Tonight, become my slave, and cook for me."

"Don't think you'll be able to live until tonight."

Third slave, failed to secure.

The reason for that failure was most likely because I'd been a hurry and said "my slave"... Well, it wasn't like I could tell her to become the slave of a golden-haired, golden-eyed girl.

And because of her connections with Gaen-san, I couldn't exactly get Kanbaru fully involved in this either, so renting her house for one night should be good enough.

As the "citadel" of the king of oddities.

I'd heard yesterday that her grandparents were out on a trip, so Kanbaru could stay over at Higasa-chan's house or even Karen's room in the Araragi house and hold a pajama party there, while I was allowed to do whatever I liked in the meantime.

I knew it made me sound like an outlaw, but it was a decision I couldn't avoid—the only building I could think of in this town that could serve as a vampire's stronghold was Kanbaru's mansion.

Just as the death-prepared, death-inevitable, death-certain vampire, Deathtopia Virtuoso Suicidemaster, had once taken up residence in the "Castle of Corpses", the iron-blooded, hot-blooded, cold-blooded vampire, Kissshot Acerolaorion Heartunderblade, needed a building of suitable pedigree in which to take up residence.

It was fairly Japanese-style for a castle—or rather it was just a Japanese mansion—but hopefully, this being Suicidemaster's first visit to Japan, she wouldn't be able to differentiate between castles and mansions in Japan... Not that I, a Japanese person, could.

"But no, I didn't say that just because I wanted to show off. If Suicidemaster were to learn that her former thrall who she came to visit had been rendered harmless and sealed in the shadow of a pervert—nay, human—she may close herself off entirely. We won't be able to hear a single shred of information. In the worst case, you might even be killed. Would you be fine with that?"

"No, I wouldn't, but..."

"In that case, become my slave again like you were in last year's spring break, and prepare a castle and a banquet. To make my reign more convincing. If you can secure two or three more fake thralls, then that would be great."

The slave sealed in my shadow stuck out her chest in pride and ordered me as such from the child seat.

Erm...

"So basically, you want to greet your old pal with a master-servant relationship in that sort of fashion?"

"Fashion is important in hospitality. I'm pretty strict on fashion. Like a Parisienne."

"No, rather than a Parisienne, you're more like a putting-on-airs-ienne. Respectfully speaking, Shinobu. Wouldn't a petty trick like this just be found out immediately..."

"Oh, you're already getting into it. 'Respectfully speaking', you say? Ka ka, you're an expert at acting like a slave already! Have you done this before? Wait, of course you have! Ka ka, keep it up for the real thing!"

With a loud laugh as if she'd already gotten accustomed to being the master, Shinobu sunk back into the shadows... It almost looked like she was assimilating with the child seat.

What a mess. She'd appeared as if she was going to listen to my concerns, but then she just said whatever she wanted to��however, as soon as I parked my New Beetle in the parking lot, before I went inside, it was then that I called Kanbaru, who'd been in the middle of her morning run, and Oikura, who'd been indulging in her slumber at her lodgings.

Kanbaru had eagerly agreed (it was scary how eager she was, but I decided to call her back and discuss it properly, as well as other things), while Oikura had refused (if I left her alone, she'd probably call me back, so at that point, I'll more or less apologize from the bottom of my heart... and ask for her home cooking separately).

Well, Shinobu putting on airs was the same as always.

I almost wanted to tell her to be more show-offy towards me, but considering the way she was cooperating for this case, I couldn't bluntly refuse that honesty... I had better properly inform Gaen-san about this, too.

Thinking about it, Kanbaru was the "niece of that Gaen-san", but in reverse, Gaen-san was the "aunt of that Kanbaru". What if Gaen-san casually went, "I'll do it, too! Let me be a slave, too!" after I went to her with our plans?... I didn't want to see Gaen-san like that.

What an odd family they were.

On the other hand, even though my parents were ordinary, upright public servants, why had all their children turned out like that?

Speaking of which, the fact that only the members of the girls' basketball team of Naoetsu High were being attacked could be rephrased as "only Kanbaru's juniors were being attacked", so maybe it was a good idea to think about things with her as the focal point.

Even if the gourmet Suicidemaster were only able to dine on "Princess Beauty", Kanbaru Suruga was the daughter (in other words, the direct descendant) of Gaen Tooe, who's practically talked about as if she were a legend—so for the club members that were under her influence, the possibility of them being targeted is...

Although, in that case, maybe Kanbaru herself would be targeted? Actually, it was fairly possible that that was the case—and if so, then using Kanbaru's house as a meeting place wasn't a bad idea, if only to see Suicidemaster's reaction, but Kanbaru herself should probably be kept far away.

That was what ran through my mind as I wandered around the campus of Manase University to kill time, having arrived earlier than expected (it was a fairly expansive university, and I still hadn't seen all of the campus yet. Supposedly, it would take over four years to check out all of the facilities—what was this, the British Museum?), but once it got close to 7:45 am, I knocked on the door to the lecture hall for my international linguistics class.

Although it was called "linguistics", it was different from classes on foreign languages in that it put languages from all over the world, both famous and unknown, on equal footing and compared them in detail. Ultimately, an unproductive course with no destination in sight—there were many incomprehensible courses like this in college.

But I liked that sort of incomprehensible stuff. Could this be Ougi-chan's influence?

It was a liberal arts course unusual for someone in the mathematics department to take, and it was hard to say that the course was particularly popular even taking into account how early in the morning it was, but for Meniko, whose goal was to work with codes in the future, there was no way she couldn't take this course—well, for her, international linguistics probably wasn't even an "incomprehensible course" (in exchange, Meniko was bad with normal foreign language study).

"Hola. Araragi-chan, you're ea~arly. How diligent of you~u."

"I dunno about being called early when you're here in your seat before me. Hola."

Not to mention, I planned on skipping class after this. Unfortunately (or not), today's lecture hadn't been canceled.

It seemed I'd have to borrow Meniko's notes another day—the number of favors I was asking her was increasing. Someday, I'd better do something for her in return.

I bumped fists with Meniko and sat down next to her, and then asked, "Do you mind if I asked you to decipher another code?", showing her the sequence of numbers that I had displayed on my cell phone.

"Hmm. Hmm, hmm?"

A normal person, after being asked to solve codes like these two days in a row, would find it strange and ask for my intentions before even trying, but this was Hamukai Meniko—she couldn't not solve a code that was put before her.

It was a difficult personality, but I liked that about her... It wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but neither I nor my proud network of friends from high school were people that moved without some reason or purpose.

Even Hanekawa and Oshino.

And even the violent onmyouji Kagenui-san that was heading towards this town was actually a person of reason—she moved according to her own, unique logic.

As a result, there had been a time when I'd thought that people were just like that, but after becoming friends with Meniko, I came to learn that there were people who weren't like that—I'd been enlightened.

Meniko also seemed to be rather interested in the fact that I was (in a rough estimate) rather logical about things, so I suppose it was a mutual thing.

In order to maintain this relationship, I didn't dare introduce Meniko to any of my other connections, such as Oikura, even by mistake—of course, I had absolutely no intention of breaking off my connection with Oikura, who I had reconnected with after entering university, but as for her... Rather than our connection being broken off, it could be more like she herself would snap.

"A cell phone, huh. Was the code recorded in a cell phone?"

"Yep. Although I don't know if that holds any meaning..."

"That's tru~ue. These days, cell phones are like a part of our brains now, aren't they? Some people criticize the fact that when you go on a trip, you end up looking at the scenery through the small screen of your smartphone, but looking at something with the camera of your smartphone is basically the same as looking at it with your own eyes. Maybe when people complain about train passengers playing with their cell phones, it's a sign that they've failed to pair their phones with themselves?"

I hadn't exactly mastered the use of a cell phone myself, so it was hard for me to wholeheartedly agree, but, well, it wasn't like I didn't understand what she was saying.

"Anyway, this time it's only numbers, huh. Hm. I did solve it, bu~ut."

"Already? You're really the one that's early to things, aren't you. The truth is, I didn't have the slightest idea."

It wasn't like I didn't feel helpless when delegating the whole thing to Meniko, so I'd thought that I'd challenge it on my own in the period of time before I took it to her, but I'd spent most of that time on Shinobu's matter.

"It doesn't seem like putting it on a phone and not on paper really mattered? But numbers are easy to make into a code, aren't the~ey. Languages can vary from region to region, depending on grammar and culture, but numbers are worldwi~ide. No matter where in the universe you are, one plus one is two, and a prime number is a prime number, ri~ight?"

"That's not actually the case. For example, in Nepalese, the representations for '1' and '9' look similar, so when a Japanese person sees them, the math wouldn't add up at a glance. The logic would look completely wrong. Also, it's only in Japan where people use the '正' kanji to count to five, and for someone like me, the little horizontal bar used to distinguish a '7' from a '1' is enough to make me not think of it as a '7'".

"I see. For someone like me, a '7' with a horizontal bar looks kind of like the kanji for seven [七] upside down, so I end up getting those confu~used. So you're above me when it comes to that, huh, Araragi-cha~an."

There wasn't really an above or a below in this exchange, but aah, I wanted to have a conversation like this.

I suddenly realized.

When Shinobu—when Princess Acerola, as "Princess Beauty"—went about destroying countries... When she was a human, did she feel the same way as this when she met a vampire?

Even though it was a relationship of eat or be eaten.

The interpretation that they were vampire and thrall, or master and slave, was at odds with the lighthearted way in which she spoke of her as an "old pal".

She had said that she'd reflected from that time with Shishirui Seishirou, so I'd interpreted it as the master-slave relationship having been reversed, but what if it wasn't that? What if Suicidemaster really was just a "friend" to Shinobu?

Like, for example, Kanbaru and Higasa-chan.

According to Hachikuji, Suicidemaster had called Shinobu a friend as well.

A friend, huh.

There had been a fiercely determined class representative who had declared, "If I can't die for someone, I wouldn't call that person a friend". But what if Shinobu wanted to meet Suicidemaster with that in mind?

Did I have the qualification to stop her?

Talking about qualifications at this point was what made me, me—regret may always come too late, but logic always took precedence. If I ultimately acted upon my emotions, then I would most likely act too late to a disgusting extent.

I should learn a bit from my new friend.

What I wanted was not qualifications, but qualities.

"Hmm. Araragi-chan, what's the matter? Thinking about something?"

"No, I'm trying hard not to think about something. So, what's the answer to the code?"

"Like yesterday, I managed to solve it, but it's a dead-end that isn't really refreshing. Even though I managed to decode it, it just leaves me stressed aga~ain. But it ended up being letters of the alphabet aga~ain."

"Alphabet—then, 'D/V/S'?"

"No~ope. This time, it's 'F/C'."

"F/C"?

029

"If 'F/C' are also initials, I wonder if there's someone from the girls' basketball team who has those initials," said Gaen-san, the human representative of logic, after hearing my report.

We were once again in Naoetsu General Hospital, in yet another hospital room different from the three we'd been in earlier—the hospital room where Kanguu Misago-chan's mummy had been put up.

"I wonder if the message was left on a cell phone to hint at that. Since they had matching straps with their initials."

"Aah... That's right, they did have those," I said.

In that sense, I would've had more hints to decipher it than Meniko did.

It wasn't really a contest, but I did find it a bit frustrating.

"By the way, Kanguu-chan also had a strap. Since she's Kanguu Misago, it was 'M K'."

"Eh? But wait, Gaen-san. Wouldn't that mean that the vampire that we're looking for is actually among the members of the girls' basketball team?"

If, not the dying message, but the living message was indicating a specific member's initials, and Suicidemaster was being falsely accused of a crime, then that would be it.

"F C".

"Not necessarily. It could be that Kanguu-chan, in a hazy state of mind, was just trying to write the name of a friend she thought of. Or it's an act of deception to make us think that way. In other words, diversionary tactics by Suicidemaster."

A vampire trying to blame a human for their vampirism—it seemed a little narrow-minded, almost pitiful at that, and not at all in line with the image of a vampire. Well, if we can consider the possibility that the crime is being pinned on Suicidemaster, why can't we consider the opposite?

Taking it to extremes, it was even possible now that this was a diversionary tactic to make us think that everything was fabricated, like a deduction in a honkaku mystery.

Us people of logic.

"You're right. It would be too unexpected a truth for there to be a vampire among the club members."

"I don't remember explicitly denying that possibility. You can't say for sure that there aren't more oddities like you, Koyomin, that put on an air of innocence and casually attend school, right?"

"Again with the jokes."

And this was a bad joke, at that.

The phrasing of "air of innocence" felt like biting words.

"It's not entirely a joke, though. Well, this is just a brute force through all the possibilities at the moment. Like a canvassing operation done by throwing more people at the problem. It's true that, as a result of last night's events, the suspicion placed on Suicidemaster has faded. 'F C' seems like it would be fairly rare for initials, so I'm sure we'll be able to narrow it down to just a few girls out of the hundred on the basketball team..."

As she spoke, Gaen-san began flipping through the register of names borrowed from Higasa-chan, beginning her check. I'd promised not to make any copies of it, so it was the original document.

"For reference, do you mind if I ask, Koyomin? About how the code was deciphered. It's possible that the method can also provide a hint for us."

"Understood. However, I don't think it'll be very relevant."

"I'd like to hear it anyway. I may not exactly be a sciences person, but it's not like I hate number puzzles. It's a great way to exercise the mind and relax."

Relax?

Putting aside exercising the mind... She didn't really look like it, but was Gaen-san actually stressed right now? With this incident taking longer than expected, Kagenui-san drawing closer to the town with every moment, and my betrayal that must not be forgotten, well, there were plenty of things that could be cause for concern.

Well, if revealing the trick is somehow relaxing, then I'll gladly do so.

It's atonement for my infidelity.

"However, this code ended up not being a number puzzle. It had nothing to do with prime numbers, either—though it's still in the sciences, it was not mathematics, but the field of natural sciences."

"Natural sciences? If we're talking about fields, in middle school, they'd divide the natural sciences into the 'first field' for physics and chemistry, and the 'second field' for biology and geology."

"In that respect, it would be the first field—Celsius and Fahrenheit."

In other words, temperature notation.

Like numbers, temperature was the same throughout the world, or perhaps even throughout the universe, and high temperatures were high, low temperatures were low, and absolute zero was absolute zero—but temperature wasn't notated in the same way everywhere. The units differed.

And that difference was Celsius and Fahrenheit.

"Ah—that's why it's 'F' and 'C'?"

As expected of a logical person, she caught on fast. After speaking, Gaen-san flipped the register shut—it seemed she'd finished checking it all.

She was even fast at reading.

"But how does '820/280/610/160' become Celsius and Fahrenheit? Although, since Celsius is 'C' and Fahrenheit is 'F', perhaps I should ask how it becomes Fahrenheit and Celsius."

"For both Celsius and Fahrenheit, a '°' is placed in the top right direction to denote 'degrees'. In the same place where you would write an exponent."

"Do an explanation like that for a science major. I got it just from you saying 'in the top right direction'—don't go off in a completely different direction, Koyomin. And?"

"We look at the '0' in the code and interpret it as a '°'—basically, the '0' in '820', the '0' in '280', the '0' in '610', and the '0' in '160', all the zeroes at the end of the numbers, should not be taken as numbers but as symbols. Then, '820/280/610/160' becomes '82°/28°/61°/16°'."

"Aha. Highest and lowest temperatures, huh?"

That was exactly it.

The code that had been left behind was showing yesterday's temperature, represented in both Celsius and Fahrenheit—just like the Rosetta Stone, which could be described as the originator of cryptanalysis.

However, the essential letters of the alphabet were missing—"F" and "C".

"That's why, 'F/C' becomes the deciphered text to the code. Oh, but if they're initials, you can't really call that a text. But I see. It's amazing that someone could come up with something like that."

"Yes. Checking the daily high and low temperatures may be natural for an athletic person, but even then, I don't think they would have been able to come up with that in their hazy state of mind."

"No, my intention was to praise your friend, Koyomin."

It would be a bit troublesome if you show too much interest in her.

If you point your finger at her.

This was entirely my own self-interest, but I'd like to settle this case before I needed to ask for help with a third code...

But after relying on Hachikuji and getting Shinobu's cooperation and borrowing Kanbaru's house, I'd strayed pretty far from what I'd originally intended, so maybe next time I'd just give up and go to Ougi-chan for help with the cryptanalysis... Although, that girl likes to be befuddling, so she definitely wouldn't just give me the answer straight up like Meniko.

She was also a person of logic. A mysterious form of logic.

But anyway, let's return to the main subject.

For the sake of protecting Meniko, and for the sake of resolving this case.

"But anyway, how many people in the girls' basketball club have the initials 'F C'? Although we'd probably need to check whether that girl has a strap or not..."

Since the first mummy, Harimaze Kie-chan, didn't have a strap on her phone, it wasn't a given that everyone had a matching strap. Perhaps, within the club, that small level of resistance against peer pressure was allowed.

"There were as much as zero people."

"Eh? What did you say?"

"Sorry, that was a weird way to put it. Zero. There were none, is what I meant. Girls with 'F C' as their initials, that is."

030

"Have you looked for the reverse order? You know, when representing the name of a Japanese person, there's the pattern of 'first/last name' and 'last/first name'."

"Of course. There were none like that, either."

Could Meniko's solution have been wrong?

No, there was no way.

"I wonder if we should expand the range of possibilities. Should we include the third-years that have already retired as candidates?"

"Umm..."

It wasn't impossible to ask Higasa-chan through Kanbaru for a list of the OG members, but I wasn't sure. If we expanded it that far, it felt like the possibilities would be endless.

It didn't seem too productive to force the solution into the initials 'F C' and look for a person that matched, either... Rare as the initials might be, it wasn't like there was nobody with those initials.

"We did figure out that the victims were members of the girls' basketball team using the straps as the hint, but like with 'D/V/S', maybe there's a famous vampire with those initials?"

"The vampires here are from overseas, after all. It's normal to add a middle name... It's unnatural to have initials with just two letters."

"Is that so..."

I'd ended up bothering Meniko with this (though she'd been happy about it) and I'd ended up skipping class (though I probably would have skipped class anyway), but it didn't end up being that much of a hint... Well, even Oshino had said that fieldwork was a cycle of futility.

It was important not to dwell on it.

"By the way, Gaen-san. You don't seem to be in that good of a mood, so is it possible that you received more unpleasant news while I was out?"

"Hm? Did it seem that way to you? I was trying to act calm about it, but this onee-san that knows everything must be losing face to receive your concern, Koyomin. Even though I want to be an onee-san you can always rely on."

"No, no. Gaen-san, you're always an older woman that I can rely on..."

"I'm not trying to be a dependable older woman. No, but anyway, Koyomin. Your worries were right on the mark. The contents of a high school girl's cell phone weren't something we should have looked at."

And the fact that it hasn't produced any good results so far is nearly breaking my heart, said Gaen-san as she laid eyes upon the mummy on the bed—the owner of the cell phone, Kanguu Misago-chan.

Having been made to wear a patient gown and laid to rest on the bed... I didn't want to say I was getting familiar with the sight, but I was getting used to it.

When humans become nothing but skin and bones, it's hard to distinguish between them—their height became ambiguous when laid down, and since they were in a sports club, their hair was fairly short, so it was hard to distinguish them that way, too.

Kanbaru had also had a short haircut when she'd been active... Don't tell me it wasn't just because they were in a sports club, but because they were following after Kanbaru...?

Everyone doing the same thing... Hm?

"Even so, this onee-san won't be surprised any more. Seriously, after being shown the ugly side of human relations, I won't even be scared of vampires."

"Being shown? Gaen-san, you're the one who went and looked at it yourself."

"And I have nothing to say in response to that. They say you're not supposed to check your partner's phone, and that's completely true. If you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you."

What was in that phone, exactly?

Honestly, if she said it like that, it made me even more curious... However, it probably was better to not ask. For the sake of respecting their privacy, and for the sake of my own health... If Gaen-san ended up like that, I might even end up hospitalized as a result.

And if it wasn't producing any good results, then all the more reason not to.

"Well, I suppose the girls' basketball team is pretty unique. If this sort of thing was commonplace... Well, it's not something I want to think about, as an adult. Their club activities are certainly strange. It felt like they were bullying themselves."

"But aren't all athletic clubs more or less like that? Even more so if you're a powerhouse."

Or rather, a former powerhouse. In the case of Naoetsu High.

Of course, that may have intensified that athletic mindset...

"Mm. I've always had a commander-like nature since I was in high school, but even then, I was still pretty incompatible with those sports-minded people."

"So there was a time when you were a high school girl, Gaen-san."

"It's not like this onee-san was always an onee-san from the moment she was born. Or an older woman."

"That wasn't what I meant... But even so, the hardest person to imagine as a high school girl would probably be Kagenui-san."

She didn't seem like she would be in the liberal arts or the sciences, or in a cultural club or a sports club... What kind of high school girl would she have been?

"That girl was actually a surprisingly diligent student. Although I only knew her as a college student, not a high school student. She's the only one from that trio to graduate without dropping out."

Is that so.

Human beings really couldn't be described one-sidedly, huh.

"Oh nooo. While I carelessly stepped into a colony of high school girls and got my feet stuck in a murky, bottomless swamp, Kagenui will probably arri~ive!"

Even if you lament the word "arri~ive" all cutely like that, that in itself seemed more lamentable.

Please remain a reliable older woman.

"It may be fine for me to think this way, but Gaen-san, aren't you being a little too cautious regarding your junior? She may be a bit uncontrollable, but it's not like she completely ignores the orders you give her, right?"

In the first place, Kagenui-san was coming all the way back from the North Pole because she was called by Gaen-san—plus, if she were truly uncontrollable, she would've ignored any sort of harmless certification and gotten rid of Shinobu and me.

Though she was infinitely violent, that was just a matter of the way she did things, and it should be possible to talk things out—she was a person of logic, too.

"That's right. It's true that, if I explain the circumstances, she might understand the reasoning behind why it's not necessary to exterminate Suicidemaster. It might even be possible to certify her as harmless, with how much of a little girl she's become."

Even while stuck in a bottomless swamp of high school girls, it seemed she'd long since considered the things I'd thought of, with the way she spoke.

"Yes. In fact, as soon as I'd heard that Suicidemaster had broken through Hachikuji-chan's mayoi-ushi barrier, those thoughts had already crossed my mind. It wasn't that Suicidemaster had broken through the barrier with brute force, but simply that she had been weakened to the point that the barrier didn't even react."

"......"

Was that even possible?

It sounded pretty painful and distressing, considering that she was the progenitor who birthed and named the legendary oddity.

"Even in that state, she should still be able to suck the blood of high school girls, so just by being in this town, nothing has changed regarding her being the prime suspect. However, the reason she became a mummy might not be because she was attacked by someone, but because she'd weakened to the point that she entered cryptobiosis by herself."

"In that case, would that mean she was the one to bury herself in the mountain?"

"Yes, it would be safer in the dirt, after all. The cryptobiotic-sleep, hibernation-sleep, dozing-sleep vampire. In that case, perhaps she was attempting to make her way back to Hachikuji-chan who was in charge of immigration control, and collapsed along the way. Well, we're still just brute forcing the possibilities here—the strongest possibility is still that she grew so hungry that she attacked a high school girl, but for now, we can apply the principle of innocent until proven guilty. But the problem is, that won't work on Kagenui."

"...Why is that?"

She sure was stubborn in a weird way.

In a sense, she was pretty laid-back to even put her faith in someone like me, but right now, Gaen-san was being weirdly obstinate in regards to Kagenui-san.

"Well, this is just between us, but they share a bit of a past. The problem at hand, Suicidemaster, and the even bigger problem, Kagenui."

"The problem—and the bigger problem."

"Even if Suicidemaster happened to not be the culprit for this case, and even if it's possible for her to be certified as harmless after not having harmed a human for the past six hundred years—even then, they share a past that makes it impossible to stop Kagenui. Though justice is the only thing that can put that unorthodox onmyouji in check, she's very likely to move out of a personal grudge for this time alone."

G—grudge?

That bundle of justice?

"If I make the wrong move, I may find myself having to excommunicate yet another junior. And I don't want to do that."

031

Kagenui-san's personal grudge probably wasn't something that other people should be prying into, so let's return to the main subject. Although the main subject was a ghost story with intense pressure. But anyway, back to the main subject.

The risk of intruding into her private life had been clearly demonstrated, and Gaen-san, who had hinted at it, didn't dare tell me the details of her past—perhaps she'd let it slip after being embroiled in the high school girls' darkness.

Speaking of being embroiled, it seemed that the reason Gaen-san associated the initials "F C" with the members of the girls' basketball team was not only because of the alphabet strap, but because she'd looked into the darkness of the club displayed on Kanguu Misago-chan's cell phone and had been influenced by it (it seemed she even considered the possibility that, in her dazed state, Kanguu-chan thought she could pin the crime on a team member that she had some friction with). But in the register, there was no one with those initials—and, as long as there was no initial for a middle name included, it likely wasn't the vampire's signature, either.

Before expanding our reach to the OG girls, one more possibility came to my mind.

"What if these aren't initials, but an abbreviation for something in English?"

"Abbreviation? ...In other words, something other than a person's name?"

Normally, Gaen-san would have come up with something in an instant, but at the moment, she'd been caught up in the murky mires of those high school girls... And it could be even more damaging to her as an adult.

I've learned that the private life of others is nothing but poison.

"It probably isn't 'franchise (FC)'—then maybe it's something like 'football club (FC)'?"

It seemed appropriate.

First a basketball club, now a football club.

It also wasn't impossible to interpret it as a franchise of making vampire thralls, forced as it was—but there was no need to twist it that much.

But before we went to Naoetsu High's soccer team, we couldn't forget the other organization in that high school that we should consider.

"'Fan club (FC)'."

"Hm?"

"There was something like that. In the past—well, it wasn't that far in the past—an unofficial fan club for the superstar Kanbaru Suruga."

It was an organization separate from the girls' basketball team, yet was an organization that was strongly influenced by Kanbaru, in a way different from the girls' basketball team.

It was something that came to mind after thinking that all the mummies' hairstyles were the same—let's see, as I recall, that fan club's name was "Kanbaru Soeurs"?

"What's that? Is it something like the Rukawa Kaede Imperial Guard?"

"Exactly. But somehow they ended up getting involved with me and I forced them into disbanding—"

"That's something really scary you're saying as just an introduction, Koyomin. Forced them into disbanding. You really are a delinquent like the rumors say, aren'tcha?"

"I think the remnants of that fan club could be related to this case."

As much as the hypothesis that there was a vampire among the girls' basketball team members was incredible to believe, the possibility that there was a vampire mixed in with Kanbaru Suruga's fan club was just as ridiculous.

But we weren't in a situation where we could afford not to consider ridiculous possibilities just because they were ridiculous.

"That's a fact that this onee-san that knows everything didn't exactly need to know. Ah, yes, but my dear sister had a cheerleading squad like that when she was in high school, too."

"It doesn’t seem like it will have much of a connection, but I suppose I should do something now that I've thought of it. She wasn't a member of the fan club herself, but my little sister is pretty close with that organization, so I'll look into it just a teeny bit."

"Your little sister?"

I looked at Gaen-san's clouded expression.

"My little sister (the bigger one)," I amended.

After hearing that, Gaen-san seemed to relax, smiling.

"You mean Karen-chan. Okay, do as you see fit. But, out of concern—from this old lady's point of view—please don't bring Tsukihi-chan into this. Of course, Koyomin, you were originally the one who said you didn't want to cause trouble for your family, but even discounting the thing with Yozuru, things that go well just don't go well when Tsukihi-chan is involved."

She's talking about you in a pretty amazing way, my little sister (the smaller one).

"And, I apologize for the late report, but Shinobu laid out some conditions for her cooperation in Suicidemaster's interrogation."

I presented an outline of the master-servant reversal to Gaen-san. Even though the plan seemed like it would be laughable regardless of the time, place, or occasion...

"Right, that sounds good."

I received the commander's approval.

Of course, she didn't say anything like "I'll do it, too! Let me be a slave, too!"

"Although, rather than an interrogation, it's practically an undercover operation at this point—but if Suicidemaster mistakenly sees that Shinobu-chan is doing well in this country, then she might end up chattering away without any caution."

Mistakenly. Well, she would certainly be mistaken.

Rather than "doing well", she'd been on the verge of being exterminated, on the verge of being killed, and on the verge of death, and in the end failed to die, turned into a little girl, and then ended up sealed in a teenager's shadow.

At any rate, seeing as I'd gotten the go-ahead to put the plan into action, it was inevitable—I wasn't sure if I could pull off the part of a slave, but I would do what I could.

"In that case, even if it didn't have to do with the fan club, I figure I should have a proper discussion with Kanbaru about this, but is there anything I should be careful about when talking to her? The situation has completely changed from yesterday."

"Something to be careful about... I'd like if you could avoid the storm entirely. I know you might feel a sense of duty, but don't go poking your nose into the murky depths of your juniors."

Her advice was not as a specialist but as a person with more seniority in life, but I wanted Kanbaru, too, to follow these words of Gaen-san, who was called a senior by various people.

Even if I couldn't mention Gaen-san's name.

Even if I doubted that Kanbaru would actually follow them.

"I'll stay at this hospital and do my best with the cell phone analysis while waiting for a report from the search party and preparing for the night."

"I'll meet up with Karen-chan and Kanbaru, and if I have some spare time I'll go drop in on Oikura."

"Putting aside your childhood friend, when it comes to your little sister and Suruga, there's no need to wait up until they come back from school. Koyomin, I think you should go back home at least once for a nap. Though I know all-nighters aren't hard on you thanks to your vampire constitution, you must still be at your limit, right?"

That was true.

Thinking about it, vampires, being nocturnal, did go to sleep in the daytime... Just as Shinobu was doing right now.

The truth was, I'd been working out a plan to drop in on Oikura's place until school let out for the day, but it seemed I'd have to abandon that idea.

Even sleeping was work.

Well, if it was around this time, that mathematics maniac was probably in class, too...

"Ah. I know. I'll split the difference and go to Oikura's place to sleep. I have a spare key, after all."

"Childhood friendships are pretty hard for other people to pry into, huh."

032

I decided to just go to my own home. Of course I needed to catch up on sleep, but I wanted to take a bath, too. Alas, I didn't have any clothes to change into at Oikura's place. I'll do something about that later.

Afterwards, I thought about saying thanks to Ononoki-chan for last night—since I'd left in a hurry, I hadn't been able to talk to her about how she relayed Hachikuji's message to me, or how she called over Gaen-san to the mountain after that.

From Ononoki-chan's point of view, I'd gotten a fortune slip and left all of a sudden, and then decided to go to hell—I probably seemed pretty weird to her... I couldn't bear being thought of as a weird guy by Ononoki-chan.

With both parents working, the first daughter a high schooler, and the second daughter a middle schooler, the Araragi house was generally empty in the daytime—I would be able to speak to Ononoki-chan, who'd infiltrated the house as a stuffed doll, without reservations.

It was one thing to give my thanks, but I figured I may as well tell her that Kagenui-san was approaching this town like a hurricane—for Gaen-san and me, it was an approach that was currently fairly inconvenient, but it could be good news for Ononoki-chan, who idolizes (?) Kagenui-san as an "onee-chan".

Because Ononoki-chan was busy with something else, she wasn't participating in this incident, but it wasn't like she was intentionally left out of the loop, unlike Shinobu until she found out—if the conversation went well, perhaps I'd be able to learn about the past between Suicidemaster and Kagenui-san, which I had failed to ask about, or rather, which I had wanted to hear but didn't want to hear.

Perhaps those ulterior motives led to my ruin, for when I arrived home, it was not just my parents and sisters but also that expressionless, frilly-dressed stuffed doll that was absent.

It seemed that young girl was even busier than public servants and middle school students, though not college students.

Well, I'd like to hear as much as what she had to say, but I didn't think it was a past that I wanted to dig into myself... If anything, maybe what I should be doing is to let the foreshadowing die so that her past doesn't get revealed?

Araragi Koyomi, killing the foreshadowing.

With that, feeling a mix of disappointment and relief, I took a shower and crawled into bed.

It seemed I'd been more tired than I realized (perhaps out of worry, too), so I slept soundly until the afternoon, waking only to the sound of Karen's return—despite her training in martial arts, she was a lot noisier in her movements, so it was easy to hear.

"Yo, Karen-chan. By the way, I wanted to ask about Kanbaru's fan club."

"That's way too direct. I haven't even taken off my shoes yet! At least welcome me back. You gotta have some sort of introduction before starting off the main topic with a 'by the way'. What happened?"

Araragi Karen. 16 years old.

She was super tall. My bigger little sister.

Tsuganoki Private High School first-year. She did not take part in any clubs, and continued to attend a martial arts dojo—something like that.

Also, her hairstyle returned to a ponytail.

"Kanbaru-sensei's fan club? Ah, aah. The one that nii-chan smashed up, huh."

"If I didn't break them up, they would've broken me. Just remembering it now, it's super scary."

The fact that she was still calling her Kanbaru-sensei was pretty considerable, but then again, the way Karen yearned for Kanbaru was... pretty unique.

I couldn't exactly give a thorough explanation of the circumstances, so I simply said, "Have you heard anything about, say, them having resumed activities?" and continued the conversation without explaining my reasons.

"Mmm. No, I don't think they have. When an organization like that comes apart once, it's pretty hard to reorganize."

"Is that so?"

"The crux, Kanbaru-sensei, retired, after all. Fans easily heat up and easily cool down."

I see... I guess it was like that.

Just as Karen said, if Kanbaru had continued to be active, then perhaps the fan club could have been passed down to the next generation, but now that the target of their admiration had retired, it was probably hard to gather new members.

And Kanbaru herself wasn't the kind of person that liked attracting that kind of attention, too—I had to admit I felt a bit elated at the inspiration of reading the deciphered code "F/C" as fan club... But I guess it wasn't that easy.

When comparing the girls' basketball team, of which Kanbaru had been a member, with the fan club, which was unofficial and separate... The quality was certainly different—if it became a fan club full of stoicism that could enforce ironclad laws without the actual person in question, it would be one of the best in Japan.

If only it had been "C/F", then it could at least have been read as "center forward", a basketball position...

Well, whether the culprit was in the girls' basketball team or in the fan club, it didn't change the reality that the vampire might be nonchalantly attending Naoetsu High—if that was even possible.

Of course, even though Gaen-san had been trying to implicate me, there were quite a few students that had gotten entangled with oddities, like Senjougahara Hitagi, Hanekawa Tsubasa, Kanbaru Suruga, or Oshino Ougi.

Well, a high school girl being a vampire did make for a prettier picture than a high school boy being a vampire—oh yeah.

"Karen-chan. You're a high school girl now, right?"

"What's with that, all of a sudden? But, that's right. I've become able to get married."

"That's not because you're a high school girl, it's because you've turned 16 years old. If anything, you've gotten harder to marry. Especially for me."

"Nii-chan, for you I'm the most difficult person in the world to marry. I'm your little sister!"

"How does it feel to be a high school girl? Is everything going well with your new friends?"

Regrettably, I pretended to be an overprotective older brother and started a survey to try and collect some live opinions—could even Karen be mired in the murky depths that had been a downer for the easygoing Gaen-san?

"I dunno what sort of school life you mean by 'going well', but this new world is pretty fun. I almost want to go to school on the weekends, too."

That's pretty insane.

But that's true, it's not like all high school girls have a dark side to them. There are individual differences, and it depends on the environment and the situation.

To put it in a good way, Karen's personality was endlessly bright, and to put it in a bad way, she was endlessly idiotic, but that wasn't just it—when surrounded by a stiff atmosphere, even the brightest idiot would lose some of that excitement. However, Karen was a follower of Kanbaru—

"—Oh yeah. Can I ask one more thing, Karen-chan?"

"What is it now? Today, it's all questions and no groping my boobs, huh."

"Don't talk like groping your boobs is a regular occurrence. I'm not going to touch them. This year."

"It was a problem when you've been touching them for the last year. Touching a girl's boobs like you were kneading clay. And? What's the question you were gonna ask?"

"You know the Fire Sisters, that you and Tsukihi-chan were a part of? You guys disbanded after you graduated, right? What happened after that?"

"Whaddya mean what happened. I told you, didn't I? Now, Tsukihi-chan's working hard on her own as Moon Fire."

I may have heard that before, but regrettably, the information she had on her sister was a bit vague.

Not that I could speak for others, considering I was the same way when it came to that sister.

What I wanted to ask was how the community of Tsuganoki 2nd Middle School changed after Karen, the mainstay and core of the school, left, like with the girls' basketball team—wasn't there anything like a war to be the replacement for Tsukihi's partner, or any sort of factional strife?

"Oh, for that, Tsukihi-chan, as the staff officer, handled it pretty well. For better or worse, Tsukihi-chan thinks she's so special that she doesn't expect anyone else, including me, to be able to imitate her."

I see. I'd been worried about my youngest sister's (excessive) self-consciousness, but that was an insight.

As is often the case with hard-working superstars, Kanbaru's self-esteem was quite low, and she had a tendency to believe that "anyone can do what I can do if they work hard enough"—that was something I could appreciate from a human perspective. However, if someone that was charismatic on a national level said such empty words as "if you work hard, your dreams will come true", then it would lead to a generation of people that actually buy into it.

Even though it wasn't Kanbaru's fault, the current state of the girls' basketball team was probably a climate formed by such a belief in hard work.

If I had to say it, when Kanbaru retired from the club because of her left arm, she should've picked a proper successor instead of leaving everything to Higasa-chan—though it was useless to say that now.

"Tsukihi-chan is basically a 'wasted effort is wasted' kind of girl. She'll say stuff like, 'Instead of hard work, just do what needs to be done!' 'If you put in wasted effort, you'll get even farther away from your dreams!'"

"I can't say that leaves a good impression..."

"She'd always insist, 'Find a way to make yourself a lucky boy or Cinderella girl!'"

"Tsukihi-chan probably shouldn't publish any business books. Speaking of which, it worries me that Tsukihi-chan, a middle school student, is coming home later than you, a high school student. Rub rub. What in the world is Moon Fire up to now that she's gone independent?"

"I dunno either. Rather than being independent, Tsukihi-chan's always been a dependent person with an independent spirit. Nii-chan, what were those rubbing sound effects you tried to mix in for the first time this year, without even trying to get them lost in the confusion? And I've heard rumors that you were helping out a magical girl, but how much of that is true?"

"Hmm."

Especially with Kagenui-san's return, I wanted Tsukihi to stay quiet, but she wasn't exactly the kind of sister that listened to her brother.

If I'd been able to talk with Ononoki-chan, I could've asked for her to do something about that... Rather than worry, it made me a little anxious.

Being a big brother was a lifetime job.

"Then, Karen-chan. I'm going to leave the house now, and I don't think I'll be coming back today, so in the meantime, watch over Tsukihi-chan carefully, all right?"

"You mean, today also, right? College students shouldn't be so flashy with their playing around at night. Your new life is an important time for you, too, nii-chan. I don't want to see you get burned like you did when you became a high schooler."

"Those are useful words. Worthy of engraving onto a chest."

"Don't engrave them on my chest!"

033

My fearless (of even a god) strategy to get Hachikuji to sit in the child seat ended in failure.

In transporting the ancient vampire from the Kitashirahebi Shrine to Kanbaru's house while waiting for her awakening (sunset), I'd proposed the formation of putting Hachikuji in the passenger seat and Suicidemaster in the back seat, but considering the size of the target of transportation, I was defeated by the logic that it would be legally safer to secure Suicidemaster, a six-year-old girl, in the child seat.

Well, considering that, in terms of outward appearance, Hachikuji was fixed in the form of a ten-year-old in fifth grade, it was already kind of impossible to fit her in a child seat—and Hachikuji was fairly grown for a ten-year-old. Over the past year, I'd directly felt her measurements with my own hands, so this was for certain. Of course, if the child seat itself were to break, it would be the end of everything.

It was a child seat I hoped to use for many years to come.

However, I'd been worried that Suicidemaster would suddenly go berserk in the middle of the day after being taken out of the shrine and lowered from the sacred mountain, so I consulted with Gaen-san on the phone and ended up applying further seals before securing her in the child seat.

The seals that Hachikuji applied as instructed by Gaen-san were, in simple terms, a blindfold and shackles on her arms and legs, but the image of a blindfolded, shackled little girl in white clothes fastened to a child seat honestly did not make me feel the slightest bit of safety in the legal sense.

If I were to go through police questioning, it wouldn't just end with my license being revoked.

My life would be revoked. Societally.

"A~ah. It was fairly controversial for Araragi-san, who loved his bicycle, to start riding around in a car, but I have to admit that the mobility of a car is certainly different. You can go all over the place, in every direction!"

Hachikuji herself seemed rather happy-go-lucky from the back seat—incidentally, she was in outing mode, which meant she'd changed from her white clothing to her clothes for an outing through the town, with her rucksack on her back.

She was sitting backwards, looking out the rear window, and flapping her legs—was it like a field trip for her?

"Hachikuji. Did your daytime stroll have any results? If you went around looking but couldn't find it, then that would mean the fifth mummy has yet to be made—maybe?"

"I'm not sure. If my godly eyes were able to reach every corner of this town without any problems, you could say this incident would not have happened in the first place. Although it's not that I regret allowing Suicidemaster-san to pass through without security."

"Well, sure."

From Hachikuji's point of view, she might even be a lifesaver—upon Suicidemaster-chan's arrival in Japan, it wouldn't have been odd if she had trampled Hachikuji underfoot, mountain and all.

Even though she was a god, our Hachiku-jin wasn't all-powerful—even in her weakened state, it could be possible for Suicidemaster to defeat even an athletic high school girl in a single blow.

"Hachiku-jin? Please stop. Don't give me a weird nickname. It seems your respect for gods is lacking, you know?"

Hachikuji did a half-turn and took her seat in the normal position.

"I knew that, with the case of Shishirui Seishirou-san, Shinobu-san had messed up twice, after all. I hoped that this could be an opportunity to wipe away that irreversible trauma—although, it would be a lie to say that I wasn't worried about letting Suicidemaster-san meet Shinobu-san, who was currently practically enslaved by a human."

That's why I'm all for the master-servant reversal, said Hachikuji.

"Although, I think it would be better to be honest about it afterwards. It would be sad to lose a friendship because of vanity. When I was alive, there was a boy in my class that I was close to, but because I'd been too vain—"

"Let's save that story for another time, Hachikuji. When Gaen-san called earlier and taught us about the sealing methods, I tried probing a bit, but it doesn't seem like they've found the fifth mummy yet."

"You seem way too uninterested in my flashback scene, Araragi-san."

"The analysis of the cell phone is still in progress, but it doesn't seem like there's any traces of her having made a call or sent a text or used an app since Kanguu-chan went missing, so it's hard to pin down the time of the crime. In other words, we still don't have proof of Suicidemaster's alibi."

I glanced at the little girl in the passenger seat.

The golden-haired little girl fixed in the child seat, in white clothing, blindfolded, arms and legs shackled.

"Is that so? Well, my credibility is at stake, too. I'll cooperate to the full extent of my power. Is it fine if I pretend to be a slave, too? Uhehehe."

"You sound less like a vampire's slave and more like a slave to money. Mm, I've thought about it, but..."

"So you've thought about it? Turning Hachikuji Mayoi into a slave?"

"But ultimately, a vampire's slave should be at least a little vampiric, or the lie will be found out. If it were Ononoki-chan, I may have just barely asked her to, but she's on bad terms with Shinobu. Plus, she's away at the moment, so it seems I'll have to be the only slave. If anything, Hachikuji, you can act as the local deity and be a guarantor for the relationship between Shinobu and me."

Not a bondsman, but a bondsgod.

It seemed rather apt.

Just as we were about to arrive at Kanbaru's house, the cell phone that I had left in the cup holder between the driver and passenger seats buzzed. This time, a call from Gaen-san—had the fifth mummy, Kiseki-chan's mummy, finally been discovered?

I felt slightly nervous, but I was driving, after all, so there was no way I could be the one to pick it up.

I'll leave it to my secretary.

"Who are you calling your secretary? Yes, hello? This is Hachikuji."

Seems like you've taken a liking to it.

"Araragi is currently driving. Yes. Yes. —Yes, I see. Understood. I'll let him know."

Finishing up the short phone call, Hachikuji returned the cell phone to its original position.

"What was it. Did we make any progress?"

"Rather than progress, it's more like we've fallen backwards."

That was Hachikuji's response.

"Putting aside the 'F C' initials, it seems they've completed their brute-force investigation of the remaining members of the girls' basketball team who were on the register, but everyone has been confirmed to be safe."

Everyone was confirmed to be safe?

"Isn't that a good thing? It's the first good news we've heard in a while. What's so backward about good news that's really worth celebrating?"

"The fact that they're safe means that they're also innocent—the results of the investigation made it clear that there is no vampire among the remaining members of the basketball team."

Back to square one.

034

The girls' basketball team members were cleared of suspicion, the fan club was also cleared of suspicion, and there were no signs of another vampire that could be associated with "F/C".

With this, Deathtopia Virtuoso Suicidemaster wasn't just the prime suspect, she was the only suspect—the only reason that could lead me to believe that she was innocent would be Shinobu's testimony that "Suicidemaster, whose diet is unbalanced to the point of refusing food, would never suck the blood of an immature high school girl".

Tonight's interrogation was becoming increasingly important—it wasn't an exaggeration to say that everything depended on my ability to act as a slave.

I never thought that I would get the opportunity to become a slave to a little girl and deceive another little girl, but I guess I never really know where life will go.

There were many things that made me think that my high school years were the peak of my life, but as I lived on, there were many more interesting things occurring.

And with that, a greeting to my sponsor, Kanbaru.

The sealed little girl and the deified girl had been left in the New Beetle parked in the parking lot of Kanbaru's home—of course, I'd made sure the air conditioner was left on. It certainly wouldn't do if I left two children in a car and came back to find that they'd been mummified.

"Hiya, Araragi-senpai. We only just saw each other yesterday, but it feels like it's been so long ago."

"It hasn't been that long!"

"Yes, now here, the key to the house. Use it however you like."

I figured it was impossible for an ordinary person to imitate this sort of openness—if you tried too hard to act simple, you'd crumble under the stress.

However, they say a person is only as unhappy as the number of keys they have... I wonder how many keys I will have in my lifetime.

"Tonight, we decided to hold a pajama party at Higasa's place. If you've made any progress with the matter from yesterday, I can pass it onto her."

It wasn't progress, but falling backwards.

But it was a bit hard to say that.

However, I couldn't turn back now, and I was committed to it—I wasn't going to pretend that I didn't know anything about the girls' basketball team now.

Regardless of the outcome of this case, I should work together with Kanbaru and Higasa to come up with a plan to reform, or perhaps break down, the current situation. Without going against Gaen-san. She'd called it a pajama party, but it seemed it was actually a gathering of the OGs of the girls' basketball team to brainstorm about the current situation of the younger team members...

This had nothing to do with Karen's remarks, but as a former near-dropout of that high school, I couldn't just leave behind the students that seemed like they would drop out. Even if it was odd to speak of me, who nearly dropped out on my own, and the club members, who were about to drop out because of their stranglehold from club activities, in the same breath.

"Oh yeah, Kanbaru. When you ended up reuniting with Hitagi-san, the senior that you yearned for, at Naoetsu High, what kind of airs did you put on?"

"Airs? What do you mean by that?"

Of course.

Even if the person she was talking to was a senior she admired, she wasn't the type to pretend to be something that she wasn't—she was the type of person to charge in just as she was. If anything, it was maybe Hitagi-san that was likely to put on airs at the time.

Or display her stubbornness.

As a result, it would end up taking over a year before Senjougahara Hitagi and Kanbaru Suruga, the Valhalla Combination, would reunite.

"Huh. You're talking as if you're looking for wisdom in regards to Shinobu-chan reuniting with an old acquaintance!"

"I didn't talk like that!"

I didn't even bring up Shinobu's name!

She certainly was Gaen-san's niece, and I couldn't let down my guard—if I let something slip, this capable junior might decide to get involved all on her own.

She might decide to pretend to be a slave all on her own.

As someone who felt badly about the fact that I'd gotten her involved in the case of Shishirui Seishirou because of my own personal circumstances, this was a situation I wanted to avoid.

I needed to make up some reason to change the subject and get rid of her as soon as possible.

"Oh yeah, Kanbaru."

"Araragi-senpai, you sure come up with things frequently, don't you. What is it?"

"There's one more thing I wanted to ask of you—"

035

Though we'd settled on Kanbaru's place for our choice of location, it would be effectively impossible to clean up my junior's disastrously messy room before sunset, and, even if she'd told me to use the house however I liked, it certainly wouldn't do to infringe upon the territory of her grandfather and grandmother, so we ultimately decided upon using the Japanese mansion's garden for the revival of Deathtopia Virtuoso Suicidemaster.

Much like at Ryōan-ji, it was a Japanese rock garden.

Well, even if it was a measure of desperation, the mansion gave off much more of a castle-like impression when viewed from outside rather than being inside.

Yesterday, it had felt like I'd greeted nightfall feeling like I'd run out of time without doing everything I had to do, but today, it felt like I'd done everything I could and was greeting the night having run out of material. Now, I wonder what will happen?

"Thanks for waiting. So, shall we begin?"

At the moment the sun had set about halfway, Gaen-san appeared with a one shou bottle—the ones to welcome her were me; Shinobu, who had woken up early and crawled out of my shadow; Hachiku-jin, our witness; and Suicidemaster, who had been laid down—it seemed a little too pitiful to lay a restrained little girl on the bare ground, so I'd put down a rush mat (I'd found the rush mat in Kanbaru's room—why did she have something like that?).

All the actors were in place.

The show must go on.

"I've set up a barrier going all the way around the mansion, so if by some chance a battle breaks out, we'll be fine."

"That 'some chance' is what I'd like to avoid... But, Gaen-san. What's with that bottle?"

"Well, I am a specialist, after all. Wine would be better for vampires, but I figured we could do this the Japanese way, with sacred sake for a demon."

I guess I couldn't rely on crosses and holy water in a Japanese mansion with a shrine's god present... Her behavior was as if she'd come to a late-night drinking party, but in this Japanese mansion it held an air of sophistication.

"You should've come in full dress, then."

"Did you want to see me in shrine maiden's clothes, Koyomin? Unfortunately, I don't respect formalities and ceremonies as much as Meme does. I may be a pacifist, but at the same time, I'm a rationalist."

Indeed, now that I thought about it, that careless-seeming middle-aged Hawaiian shirt guy was surprisingly pretty picky about arrangements and whatnot to the point of irrationality... And looking closely, Gaen-san's bottle was just a bottle of cheap sake from a discount store... It was a bit difficult to call that sacred sake.

I guess it's the Gaen way to push through what's difficult.

"Goodness, I never thought I'd be visiting the Kanbaru house that rejected my dear sister like this—the wheel of fate sure turns."

As she spoke in an amused manner, Gaen-san casually turned over the one shou bottle and poured it over the body of the little girl.

Rather than occult ceremony, if anything, it seemed more like the "magic kettle" thing they did in rugby clubs.

Good, judging from that composed demeanor of hers, it seemed Gaen-san had managed to safely get through the murky swamp of the high school girls.

"Ooh. White clothing getting wet and sticking to a little girl's body... Kind of erotic, don't you think?"

Hachikuji made a vulgar remark, unbecoming of a god—for the record, though I hadn't touched upon it (double meaning) out of kindness, when you were meditating under a waterfall for a joke yesterday, you looked the same way, y'know?

Putting that aside.

"By the way, Shinobu-sama."

"...... Hm? Ah, you mean me, my master?"

She wasn't getting into her role at all.

Her servile disposition was so deeply ingrained in her.

"I mean, my servant. What is it?"

"Even if you catch it right away... Well, it's fine. Listen, Shinobu-sama. My master. Would you allow me the honor of inquiring something of you?"

"If you bring that quality of acting to the real thing, it'll be your fault if we get found out, my mast... my servant."

I think it would be both our faults.

But since we didn't have time, I continued instead of retorting.

"I haven't really thought too deeply about this until now, but... What's it like, living for six hundred years?"

"Huh?"

"I mean, if I may be permitted to speak for myself, I believe I have undergone quite a few changes, just looking back over the past year."

"Speak normally. I can't tell what you're saying at all."

Right.

I didn't even know what I was saying at all.

"In the course of our lives, we change our opinions, change our minds, realize our mistakes, and learn right from wrong, right? I won't make friends, because my strength as a human would decrease—when I used to say that, I really believed it, and I don't think I could have believed back then that I would have normal friends in college."

And that was in just a single year.

If that had been six hundred years—I'd ended up suddenly wondering how I would feel when I looked back on the past.

"I can't tell what you're saying at all, even when you're talking normally—after all, I've been quick to cast away the past that I can't remember."

Was it because she couldn't remember, or because she didn't want to remember? She probably didn't even remember that.

Well, it's fine. I just wanted something to say at the last minute—not even I, speaking normally, could tell what I was saying at all.

Just because they were meeting again after six hundred years, didn't mean they had to make the same decisions they made six hundred years ago—is that what I wanted to say? However—if I ran into Kissshot Acerolaorion Heartunderblade on the verge of death in an alleyway again, what if I would offer up my neck again, just like I had done a year ago?

"In the first place, before oddities are immortal, they're unchanging, universal. They don't change so frequently, like humans do."

"Then, let me ask you the same thing I did in that spring break. Shinobu, to you..."

To you, what are humans?

When Oshino Shinobu had not been Oshino Shinobu, when she had been the vampire, Kissshot Acerolaorion Heartunderblade, she had responded immediately.

She'd responded—"food".

But for Shinobu now, that was incorrect.

Even under the premise that she was sealed—but when you took that out, it was still incorrect.

However, what she would respond was another matter entirely—and it was as if Shinobu had been caught off guard, because for a moment, she fell silent. But, as if aiming for that moment...

"O devourer, o imbiber, o lurker! Now that the holy sun has set, tear open the coffin and rise! Boil the flesh in blood, and stir it with the bones!"

Gaen-san started chanting something like a magic spell that had taken the world by storm a few decades ago—it seemed like a joke, but it was for real, right?

"Come together with the night! Deathtopia Virtuoso Suicidemaster!"

It seemed like the sort of hackneyed incantation that I would've been convinced if she'd said, "Just kidding," but in that instant, the little girl soaked in cheap sake began to glow gold—or so it seemed.

But it was just my imagination, and my misunderstanding.

In actuality, the girl who had been sleeping as if she were dead had suddenly opened her eyes—the blindfold flew open, revealing two eyes as golden as her hair, and it had felt to me as if they were glowing.

Miss Suicidemaster's facial features, who had previously appeared as expressionless as Ononoki-chan's, became clearer as she awoke—though they had the same golden hair and golden eyes, she gave off a different impression from Shinobu.

The sake that had been sprinkled over her evaporated in an instant—not only the shackles on her arms and legs, but even the sash of her white clothing flew off, just like her blindfold.

Had Gaen-san broken the seal, or had the little girl herself broken it? It wasn't clear from afar—but if anything, my impressions were more towards the latter, and I couldn't help but think, "What part of her is weakened?"

I was just beginning to regret my thoughtless act of treatment, which made me recall my actions last spring break, and was wondering if it would have been better to leave her as a mummy, but then...

Creak!

The little girl's face turned towards me.

Lying on her side, only her head turned to look towards me—no.

Not me. Those golden eyes had fixed their gaze upon the one standing on my shadow, the other little girl in this garden—within moments of waking up, the ancient vampire had sensed her former thrall.

And then.

"Ha."

She said.

"Ha." "Ha."

She said.

"Ha." "Ha." "Ha."

She said.

"Ha! Ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

She said—sprawled out on the ground, from the lowest position imaginable, her laugh rang out louder than I could have imagined.

And in response to that loud laugh, Shinobu, who had borne vivid witness to her former "master"'s revival—

"Ha."

She said.

"Ha." "Ha."

She said.

"Ha." "Ha." "Ha."

She said.

"Ha! Ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

She—laughed in return.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

If it weren't for the barrier, their loud exchange laughter would surely have disturbed the neighbors—it was like microphone feedback. How long had it gone for?

Six hundred years. A thousand years.

Did it go on for eternity?

It was quite the uproarious bout of laughter, as if Gaen-san and Hachikuji and I weren't even there in that garden, but it was finally brought to an end.

"Somehow or other, it seems I've died again."

That was the remark from the little girl on her back.

And, hearing that, Shinobu shrugged her shoulders.

"It seems we've both grown old," she said.

The two little girls had reunited for the first time in six hundred years.

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