#'girls i found what's wrong' 'i fixed it all it's all done and over'
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People who work on stuff that requires working in groups are so emotionally resilient. I've been doing this project with two classmates that I KNOW are responsible and serious and nonetheless my nerves almost gave in (okay scratch that, they totally gave in at some point) whenever something went wrong. I am too much of a perfectionist control freak to trust others with this type of split duties model.
#no cause we thought we had fixed the problem but then it wasn't fixed#and they weren't answering my messages (unfortunately they were probably eating dinner while i was losing my mind)#it sucked bc i needed their parts to be fixed so that i could be done with it al AT LAST#bc i was doing the very last step (a mockup)#and they were offline!! and i was stressing out bc the deadline is tomorrow AND I WANTED TO GO TO BED 😭!!!#and it's not their fault bc they thought the colours had been fixed! but turns out they were not completely fixed#i was crying. and it was not a figure of speech.#thank god the last bit of fixing was much easier than i thought it would be so i did it myself#but not before i sent like ten fucking messages all but begging them to resurface and fix it#my messages are literally 'we didn't fix it' 'please can you fix it' girls i will do it myself' 'girls i can't do it. can you do it pls'#'girls i found what's wrong' 'i fixed it all it's all done and over'#the messages on their own make me look INSANE and timestamps oh lord the timestamps. every five minute i was saying something different.#i can never come up with a solution to any stressful thing like a normal person istg i always have to have a panic attack beforehand#I'M GOING TO FUCKING BED#and probably have nightmares about colors and tiffs and psds and jpgs and pdfs and formats and layers hsagdasgdaksldg#me.txt
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why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up
#i'm overthinking something that i did and was told off for doing by my director#and on my way home i was thinking when was the last time i was even talked to like that during a production#and then i remembered the costume experience from hell of only a couple months ago that i've already began blocking out#but the thing is that that person was someone i knew i'd never have to work with again#i mean at first i thought i would have to work with them more. then they announced they were moving away immediately#so i only had to deal with them face to face for another weekish after that point and anytime they yelled at me#i was like 'cool. i'll do exactly what you say to do. and nothing more.' but then of course me being me#i did some extra stuff and they initially were like 'oh that's pretty' and then days later told me to cut everything i added#and like sure i get that the show was frozen but girl. that costume was unfinished. i was trying to finish it. it was frozen but looked bad#anyway. whenever they yelled at me and had actual malice in their heart i was like whatever. i was hurt. but i didn't care as much.#but this time it's someone i've worked with many many times before and it was about a habit i have that i know isn't great#but at the same time the thing that prompted it wasn't even me doing this habit it was something else#but she interpreted it as that habit and said that i can't do that on a production she's directing#and that if i couldn't stop then i could pull out from the production and there'd be no hard feelings between us#and honestly i think her reassuring that she knows i'm valuable and that she wants me there while also telling me not to do this thing#and the fact that she's someone i like working with and will continue to work with just made it all hurt so much more#especially since she referenced another past production we've done where i didn't even realize she had noticed that i do this.#and i found myself in near tears. and still am kind of in near tears. i can't decide if i need to cry or not.#and i had NO sleep last night so i was looking forward to sleeping tonight but now i'm just overthinking EVERYTHING#and like. i know everything will be fine. if i just stop inserting myself and stick to just my specific tasks. it'll be fine.#but this is one of the ways my ocd manifests. i feel like i have to personally fix something i notice going wrong. or it'll be bad.#because every single time i choose to sit back and not be nosy when i notice something it ends up bad in a way i could have prevented#if i just inserted myself in a situation i technically wasn't part of but knew i could help or fix. so i just need to not do that.#but then i feel guilt if it does go wrong in the ways i immediately assumed it would and in a way i could prevent.#and i've been trying to work on this for like 6 months and aaaahhhh it's hard and being called out on it from her just really really hurt#i still may or may not cry. i don't know. the irony of me telling my therapist THIS MORNING that it's been a while since i last cried.#and the universe being like 'i took that as a challenge' and handing me this situation for me to spiral over.#i need to leave things alone. i need to stare straight ahead. and ignore whatever isn't specifically for me to do. but ahhh i want to help#and then of course my mom has this same habit and it annoys me when she does it yet i do it to other people and ahhhhhhhh#brain please just shut up. i need to sleep. i have to work tomorrow.
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Older Boyfriend Simon Riley
Thanks to the notes on my last post, I will be posting this blurb here. It's just for shits and giggles.
Older Boyfriend!Simon Riley who has been the best boyfriend you have ever had.
Refuses to let you call a handyman. Leaky sink? He had it fixed before you even knew there was a problem. Squeaky desk chair? Suddenly completely silent.
Gets really competitive with Mario Kart and refuses to play again after losing a couple of rounds. Gets really into Minecraft but doesn’t let you help build things because “You’re doing it wrong” even though you’re the one who taught him how to play
Does not understand girl math.
-- “The fuck you mean it’s not real money
-- “If I use cash, it’s free because it doesn’t come out of my account. Therefore it’s not real money.”
-- “I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works.”
-- Now drops cash in your purse so that you have “fake” money to use.
Hates girl dinner only because he knows that a bowl of popcorn or a couple crackers and cheese is not a full meal.
A year of his life drops off every time he hears you saying “I’m doing it for the plot.”
Refuses to download tiktok but will watch them on your phone with you for hours at a time
Went on a very long lecture about the Roman Empire and how it came to be (talk specifically about the military aspect) once you mentioned something was your Roman empire. Didn’t even notice you had fallen asleep halfway through the lecture. Still doesn’t know what you mean when you say something is your Roman Empire.
Has absolutely no idea what you mean when you say “same.”
-- You had to explain that it was just something you said when you found anything relatable
-- “What the bloody hell could be relatable about a plastic bag blowing across the road.”
Has attempted to use the word slay in a sentence and it only ended with you in the longest laughing fit known to man.
Listens to you explain celebrity beef and wonders why you talk about them like you know them personally and how you know all this information.
Vine references, goes right over his head.
-- One time quoted “Road work ahead, uh yeah I sure hope it does” after you had done it so many times, you nearly choked to death on air that day.
Emojis are his worst enemy. Never gets the message when you try to hint at something using emojis.
Learns very early on that anytime you two go out for errands, you require a sweet treat.
-- Uses going out to get a sweet treat as an excuse to take you out on dates
-- Also makes sure to buy you a sweet treat anytime you complete a task you didn’t want to do.
#simon ghost riley#simon riley#ghost simon riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley hcs#ghost cod#ghost x reader#ghost hcs#call of duty hcs#call of duty#ghost call of duty
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Puppy love
pairing: Max Verstappen x reader
summary: During his karting days, you were one of his opponents, but outside the track he was just a stupid boy who fell in love with a pretty girl. Now, after all those years, you meet again in the paddock, and he doesn't want you to leave.
note: Yes, Jos is an asshole in this (too).
“Have you seen who jumped in to do the interviews?” Charles asked with a wicked smile when he stopped next to his rival after the race. Max hadn’t really paid attention to these details until now, but now that he was informed there was something he should probably know, he looked around to see where the reporter was. “I haven’t talked to her since your dad ruined her career. But she seems truly happy now.”
That’s when his eyes fell on you, the girl who had been haunting him in his dreams for long years, the one who was glowing while talking to the cameraman. He wanted to object, he wanted to say “my dad didn’t ruin her career, she just decided to quit,” but the way you had left certainly hinted at a possible connection between the two events. Because his father’s outburst took place a week before he found out you weren’t coming back to race, and you didn’t even try to contact him ever again.
What made it real hard was the fact he knew you were left heartbroken, and it wasn’t racing that you missed. His mother called your parents to ask them about you, and they said you had been crying in your room for days, but when the option for a call from Max came up, they were quick to shut it down. They said it would be easier for you to move on if he didn’t show up in your life again, and he couldn’t help but blame himself for everything that happened.
If he hadn’t fallen in love with you, if he hadn’t met you on a vacation, if his father hadn’t found out he loved someone, maybe you would still be racing. He remembered your bright smile that was present even after a tough race, and your good mood that was often highly contagious. The boys you raced against loved you dearly, mostly because you brought a different energy into their little boys’ club.
“Max, you’re next,” he was told all of a sudden.
He wasn't ready to face you, but there was no escape. What he had to do now was force a smile on his face and act like he was talking to someone else, someone whose presence didn't affect him half as much as yours did. But the moment he stopped in front of you and noticed a strange glint in your eyes, he had to focus on breathing in and out while you asked your first question.
After the camera was turned off, he cautiously watched you to see if you were planning to approach him, or if you seemed open to the possibility of him doing that. When you looked at him with a smile and said goodbye to the cameraman, he walked over to you with his hand folded behind his back.
“It's nice to see you here,” he said with a small, cautious smile. You nodded, but Max could see behind the cheerful look on your face, he could tell you were tense. “If I'm bothering you, just say it.”
You took a deep breath, and soon your smile changed, and it was now showing a lot more sadness. “It's been a while, that's all. Talking to you in person brings back different memories,” you admitted.
“Good or bad ones?”
Following a shrug, you folded your arms over your chest and looked down at your shoes. “Compared to the ones that come back when I see you or Charles on TV? Bad,” you finally replied.
Max gulped upon hearing this, feeling guilty despite knowing he had done nothing wrong, that whatever happened back in the day was the result of a series of decisions made by your parents. If it was up to him, he would have kept in touch with you, doing his best to see where this puppy love would lead the two of you. Maybe you would have broken up after he got into F1, maybe you would be married by now. It was a question he had no answer to.
The best he could do now was trying to make you understand this, making you see that he wanted to fix things now, even if you would be nothing more than friends. Sure, he had no idea how much you had changed over the years, but he knew there was only one way to find out. “I know it means very little after all these years, but I’m sorry,” he said to break the deafening silence.
You nodded, then to his surprise, took a step closer to him. “I know it wasn’t your fault. My parents told me what happened exactly eventually.”
He watched you closely, trying to figure out if you were interested in a proper conversation, maybe later in private. But before he could speak up, Charles walked over to the two of you and wrapped an arm around your shoulder with a big smile on his face. “It’s been so long,” he said happily, earning a shy smile and a barely visible shake of your head from you.
Max bit the inside of his cheek, annoyed by the sudden appearance of the Ferrari driver, but the main problem was a vivid memory from his childhood. While him and Charles had gone for blood on the track and didn’t have the best relationship off it either, you and the Monegasque were on very good terms, with you even visiting him and his family in his home. It didn’t bother him until his brain finally caught up with his feelings and he realized he had a crush on you, because then he felt intense jealousy every time his rival laid a finger on you, even if it was nothing more than a friendly pat on the shoulder.
You then suddenly moved to give him a hug, and seeing the way Charles wrapped his arms around you made his blood boil, even if he knew deep down that he had no right to be jealous. But it was painfully obvious that the two of you were talking to each other, keeping your voices down as much as you could in the noise around you, and he couldn’t help but wonder what it was all about.
Then he finally let go of you and said goodbye, although the two of you agreed to have dinner in Italy next week to catch up. Max took a deep breath and thought about what to say, but before he could come up with anything, an official came over to drag him to the cooldown room, so all he could do was apologize and say goodbye, wishing he could see you again next week. According to Charles you were supposed to be there in Monza, which meant he would have the chance to talk to you.
To properly talk to you and possibly find out more about your life after you quit racing.
He knew in the cooldown room they were supposed to talk about the race, but all he could think about was asking Charles what you talked about, what was so secretive that no one else could hear it? So, in the end he didn’t say much, he just watched the recap of the race and discussed what he saw if it was standing out. Even while standing on the podium, his eyes scanned the crowd under them, trying to find you as if he was playing Where’s Wally?
On the way home, he spent his time browsing your social media accounts, and he couldn’t help but wonder why he had never checked them. On X, you were posting about F1 news, commenting on them as a journalist, while on Instagram you focused on sharing more personal posts, like photos of your holiday, your hobbies, or yourself in the paddock. There had been so many of those, how come he hadn’t met you before?
Having a glimpse into your life felt so nice that he hadn’t realized he had scrolled back a few years. Well, not until it turned out he accidentally liked a few of your old photos. If you hadn’t seen the notifications, he wouldn’t have noticed that. But you saw them and weren’t shy to send him a DM about it.
The next few days passed with him regularly checking his DMs to see if you wrote to him again, if you changed your mind and decided to have dinner with him, but there was nothing, so he was forced to wait for the perfect opportunity to talk to you in the paddock in Italy. How he would find you in the flurry of people was a mystery, although he had a fleeting idea that maybe their PR team could help him get a hold of you. Not like that could work, a request like this would certainly give them a stroke, assuming he was planning to give a random interview.
His heart skipped a beat when he noticed you at the press conference, talking to some of the drivers behind the cameras. Your eyes were shining brightly, your smile lit up the room around you, and Max felt like he had been taken back to his childhood when all the boys at their karting races swarmed around you to get a scrap of your attention. But those were hormone-driven teenagers, while these guys were grown men, many of them in serious relationships, so he knew it wasn’t entirely the same situation.
This time Max made sure he could stick around after the interviews, hoping to get a hold of you once you were done. He approached you after everyone left and you decided to chat with someone from the crew. He cleared his throat nervously, subconsciously expecting you to yell at him, to tell him to leave you alone. But your poker face was perfect, because you turned to him with a kind smile and acted like you were ready to have a pleasant chat with him. The crew member left you alone, so only the two of you were left there.
“You either don’t understand the word no, or you just learned to completely ignore it because you always get what you want,” you said with a sigh, the smile long gone by now.
He let the last part of the comment go past his ear, instead he just took a deep breath and began to massage the back of his neck. “Can’t we have a pleasant conversation? Just put everything aside, forget about our shared past, and let’s treat this as a chance for a fresh start.”
You watched him with a thoughtful hum for a while, then nodded. “All right. What would you like to talk about?” you asked with a curious look in your eyes.
“Us.”
“There’s no such thing as us.”
“Too bad, because that’s exactly what I want,” he was quick to inform you, mentally kicking himself for being this straightforward, even if it was true. Because he wanted to see if you would be interested in the 2.0 version of your relationship, the chance to see how your young love would work out in your adult lives. “Are you seeing anyone?”
For a moment you hesitated, but then you shook your head. “No. I don’t really have the time for that,” you replied honestly. Before Max could speak up again, though, you began to talk once more. “But I’m a reporter here, dating a driver would be… unethical. I can’t play favorites,” you explained.
Max took a quick look around, then gently placed a hand on your cheek. “We can figure that out later. Let’s focus on step one, which is going on a first date. Tonight? We can turn to room service to help us out if you don’t want to meet somewhere public,” he told you.
“So you want me all to yourself in your hotel room?” you asked with a teasing smile.
He was sure as hell he blushed, because the idea of what you were suggesting hadn’t occurred to him. Having you alone in his hotel room wasn’t something he consciously planned out, he only wanted to meet you somewhere away from the curious eyes. “It’s not like that,” he told you defensively.
“I know, don’t worry. Send me the when and where,” you said as you patted his shoulder. “See you later, Max.”
Nodding, he watched as you walked away from him. He didn’t say a word–no, he couldn’t say a word. His brain was too busy replaying the way his name rolled off your tongue, that sweet, soft tone of your voice as you said goodbye. With his mind still lost in a pink haze, he returned to their motorhome to gather his things and call it a day. He couldn’t wait to meet you, that was all he could focus on.
A few hours later he was sitting on the edge of his bed, his foot nervously tapping on the floor while he waited. You could be here any minute, and waiting was the worst part. Well, maybe the conversation wouldn’t be that much better, but he could still hope for the best. So when half an hour later there was a knock on his door, his lips curled into a wide smile and he rushed over there to let you in.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I was held up in the media center,” you apologized the moment the door closed behind you.
Max had to take a deep breath to calm himself. You being close to him again brought back feelings he thought he had long forgotten, and he wanted to give you a kiss, a soft kiss to test the waters with you. But he had to behave, he had no idea where the two of you were standing right now. “It’s okay, don’t worry. So, dinner?” he asked after a short break, giving you a smile.
Food seemed to get you in the mood to chat, because as the two of you enjoyed the various dishes he ordered, you started to tell him about your life after everything that had happened back then. You finished high school like a normal kid, went to college to study journalism, and you managed to get jobs at various places that were related to motorsports, especially F1. That was your dream, to once work with this world, but you were quick to clarify knowing he made it here didn’t give you the idea.
He tried to hide the cocky smirk that wanted to show up on his face, because he was sure what you said weren’t true. A voice in the back of his mind told him you wanted to see him again, that you wanted to get back what had been taken from the two of you all those years ago. After all, why wouldn’t he think that? It didn’t take much convincing to get you to meet him tonight. And if he was delusional? At least it was a nice thought.
It was then his turn to talk, so he told you stories that you had probably never heard, about himself, about the grid, about everything, really. If you asked questions about his family, you focused on his sister and mother, but you were mostly interested in his cats and hobbies. As you told him, you couldn’t understand how he ended up being such a cat dad, but it certainly suited him.
“Charles said he doesn’t get murderous thoughts about you several times a day lately,” you suddenly noted with a short laugh.
Clearing his throat, Max tilted his head to the side. “You talked to him?” he asked casually.
You nodded and took another bite of your pasta. “Yeah, we had dinner yesterday. I remember how the two of you were back then, I was wondering what the situation was now,” you said with a shrug.
A wide grin crept on his face upon hearing this. “So you asked him about me.”
“It was just one question, don’t get too cocky,” you pointed out with a roll of your eyes. “But I’m glad you kinda get along now. It’s nice to see that.”
Max flashed a smile at you, then returned his attention to his dinner. For a while you both ate in silence, but then you got rid of the plates and he found himself wondering what to do next. So he just looked down at his hand and moved it closer to yours, letting his little finger brush against yours as if you were back in your teenage years. You let out a laugh when you noticed, and you looked at him with a kind smile. You weren’t as cold as you had been earlier today, now you seemed to have warmed up to him, ready to give him a chance to show you what he wanted.
So, he took a deep breath and leaned in to kiss you, cautiously moving his lips against yours to make sure he didn’t scare you away. It took you a few seconds, but you eventually eased into the kiss, one of your hands even moving up to his face to keep him close. He couldn’t hold back a quiet chuckle that drew a questioning hum out of you. Max shook his head, then he dived in to kiss you again, but at the same time he let his hand wander under your shirt, even though he could have expected what happened next.
Because you pulled away and pushed his hand away from your body. “Stop, don’t… I shouldn’t even be here, I should just go, and–”
“Hey, hey, hey, don’t do this, don’t push me away. I’m sorry. If you want to slow down, that’s exactly what we’re gonna do, okay?” he asked you, his voice desperate. For a minute or two you remained completely silent, you were just watching him with doe eyes, as if you were trying to process what just happened. “Please, just stay,” he said quietly.
You hesitantly took his hand and gulped loudly as you gathered your thoughts. “Listen, it’s complicated. I already told you, I shouldn’t date drivers, but,” you began, but fell silent without finishing the sentence.
Max cupped your face and rested his forehead against yours. “One step at a time, all right? We’ll figure out if this could even work between us, then we’ll decide how to move on,” he said with a soft smile. When you nodded, he kissed your nose. “Good. Do you want to stay with me and cuddle a little, or would you rather go?”
“We just cuddle, right?” you asked with a thin voice. When he nodded, you let out a soft sigh. “Okay, just for a little while, then I’ll leave.”
But you didn’t leave. The next morning he woke up to you sleeping soundly with your head on his chest, snoring softly while you were lost in your dream world. Max couldn’t stop grinning, he was way too excited and happy to keep a straight face. It felt so nice, so natural, that he wondered how long you would be against it. You clearly wanted this as much as he did, but if you needed time, he was willing to give it to you.
As you lay there, he remembered that vacation all those years ago, when your parents not-so-accidentally bumped into his mom. His first date in a local cinema, watching a movie that was dubbed and neither of you could fully understand it. His first kiss in that movie theater with a girl that was special enough to catch his attention. The way you fell asleep with your head on his shoulder one night when your parents talked a little too long in a restaurant on the beach.
And he was hell-bent on going back to that town to experience everything again as adults. All he needed was you softening enough to let him take care of you in front of the whole world.
#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#max verstappen#formula 1#f1#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic
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Hear me out, please |James Potter
Pairing: James Potter x Slytherin!Fem!Reader
Word Count: 7.5k
Summary: The aftermath of when James found out you were his 'cinderella'. James tries desperately to get your attention to get you to hear him out. A tiny twist.
Notes: Not proofread, grammar mistakes. Timeline might be a little off, but magic so whatever i guess? Sorry for the long wait, I hope you guys will think it was worth it!!
Masterlist Part one Part two
___________________________________
A lot of things went through James' mind as he stood there in the Great Hall. You could hear a pin drop before Regulus finally shot into action and dashed out the hall to go after you.
The murmuring started to continue now that the first silence had been disturbed.
"Oh gosh, she's so dramatic," your sister laughed. And she put a hand on James' shoulder to pull him back to his seat.
James turned his head slowly. His attention zeroed in on the hand on his shoulder. He coiled away.
"What the fuck have you done," he spat at her.
Marla's eyebrows shot up. "We did you a favour," she stated, as if it was the most obvious thing ever.
It sent James over the edge. He grabbed her upper arm and harshly shook it.
"A favour? A favour!?" He asked incredulously. His voice raised in volume. "What on earth is wrong with you!" He screamed and looked around; his eyes blown out. "With all of you!"
"You mean what the hell is wrong with you, James?" Your other sister, Alyssa, piped up. "Why are you defending her?" That last word was spat out with so much disgust that it opened finally James' eyes to what you must have endured. He fought the urge to slap her expression off her face.
James let go of Marla's arm and pushed her a few steps back while doing so.
No, he needed to fix this. He just had to. If you would just listen to him, he would explain it all. And then he'd protect you. From every hurtful comment out there.
If you would just let him.
"Regulus," James grimaced. The boy was blocking his path and view, standing in the doorway. You were out of sight, or at least out of James's sight.
"Potter," Regulus curtly nodded at him.
"I need to talk to her."
"You've said plenty."
James 'brows furrowed, and his jaw flexed. Why was everyone deciding everything for him all of a sudden? Why couldn't everyone just mind their own bloody business? If they had, none of this would have occurred.
He would be patrolling with you in the evening, and you would make him laugh about one of your dry remarks. He wouldn't have known that it was you who he was looking for, but in time, maybe he would've figured it out. Or maybe he would've pushed his mystery girl to the back of his mind to let you and all the new feelings in.
"Actually, I haven't. I haven't said enough because everyone is saying things in my place instead. But I never got the chance to say what I want to say, and every time I do, it seems too late. I just want to talk to her." The words flew out of James' mouth, built up regret, anger, and disappointment from how things had escalated.
"Perhaps you haven't said much." Regulus looked James up and down and weighed his words carefully. "And maybe that's part of the problem. But right now, she's certainly heard enough. She doesn't want your grand words."
James closed his eyes in frustration. He wanted to protest, he wanted to scream at himself and pull his hair out, but ultimately, he just wanted yet another chance.
He hadn't expected it to be you. Not at all, but the longer he thought about it, the more it made sense, and the more it seemed... right. And he didn't know why he had been so adamant to form some sort of relationship with you, but the way his heart blossomed when you were around only pulled him further in.
James looked at the ground, as if the solution to his problems would be written down there.
"Okay," he relented.
Without a moment of hesitation, Regulus went to slam the door in his face but stopped at the box that James held put to him.
"What's that supposed to be?" He flatly asked James.
With a heavy heart, James showed Regulus the pair of glass slippers that you had left behind at the Yule ball, and that he had so carefully carried around with him.
James searched for his words his. "I've been holding on to these to return them to their owner," he made an attempt at a smile but dropped it, feeling pathetic. He wondered if he looked as pathetic to Regulus as well.
"Well, I suppose I should return them, now that I've found her." James pushed the box into Regulus' hands, threw one glance past the boy in hopes to catch a glimpse of you, and rubbed his face with both hands as he dejectedly walked away from the Slytherin dormitory.
Perhaps he could try again later.
You stared at the glass slippers in your hand. It felt cool to the touch and looked so beautiful, but you couldn’t help the bitter taste left in your mouth. With one smooth movement, you threw and smashed one of the slippers against the wall opposite of your bed. It shattered in pieces, and you had to smile at that. Even with every spell to reenforce the glass so you could actually walk on it, it broke. Then you gathered every bit of frustration you had in you, and you screamed as hard as you could, tears flowing in frustration.
You hated that you were crying. But the sheer defeat and powerlessness that you felt was too overwhelming, your voice cracked mid-scream and you threw the other slipper to pieces in anger as well. It wasn’t even about the gossiping amongst the students anymore.
You were so tired; you actually couldn’t bring yourself to care about what everyone must be thinking right now. But your sisters and James. You dug your nails into your palm.
You looked at your reflection in the mirror and straightened your posture. With your hands, you smoothed out your frown, fixed your hair and put on a wide smile. All in all, you looked psychopathic, but anything was better than pathetic. You turned on your heel and got ready for your first morning class.
James watched your empty seat in Divination class. This was the only class in which the last two years were put together. He wondered if you would show up. But he knew you. Possible more than anyone. So, he knew that you would never miss a class, because you wanted perfect grades and a perfect attendance rate. You were just like that. Ambitious.
James mind replayed your words again. He was every worst characteristic of Gryffindor; you had said to him. ‘Arrogant, prideful, and reckless’.
Next to James, Sirius was also lost in thoughts. Your words resonated in his head as well. Prejudice creates a vicious cycle. It was true. Sirius’ eyes flickered towards the other empty seat where Regulus was supposed to be. He had completely abandoned Regulus, giving his brother the cold shoulder, and despising his elitist thoughts, undoubtedly created by his mother. Because he had abandoned Regulus.
Sirius wondered what would have happened if he had tried to maintain a good relationship with Regulus after having been sorted into Gryffindor. He wondered if he would have been able to convince Regulus to run away with him.
There was a knock on the door and Regulus walked in with a blank face. He nodded his head in apology at the Professor and took a seat. The door opened again, this time with a little more force.
“My sincere apologies, professor.” You wore a smile that sent chills up James’ back. His body almost involuntarily shot up to go up to you, but he caught himself, and he longingly looked at you as you passed by instead.
After having gotten used to your discrete gestures of acknowledgement in the form of waves, smiles, nods or even winks, James’ heart tugged when you didn’t spare him a glance. You graciously took a seat and motioned at Professor Trelawney to continue.
James jumped up when class was over. His belongings had long since been packed, and he dashed towards your leaving figure.
“Y/N!” he called out to you.
You turned around and looked him in the eye. All the words that James had prepared during the rest of class escaped his mind. James felt those chills again and he finally understood that in all his years with fights between the two of you, you had been petty, threatening to take points away. You had been angry, throwing insults back at him, and you had very much been a major asshole in general. But you had never been this hostile.
“Let me say this once, so we can all be done with it, and never talk about this again, Potter,” you sharply stated. “I am sorry that I wasn’t who you wanted me to be. However, let me make it clear that this was my secret and mine to share. And I made perfectly clear that I was not going to, so your blatant disrespect to publicly call me out the way you did, is simply appalling.”
Remus called James’ name and James made the mistake to look back. When he turned to you again, you were already further down the hall, turning the corner with a steady pace.
James didn’t see you around anymore until Thursday morning. His eyes basically lit up and he repeated his apology in his head. “L/N, wait,” James tried, and he chased after you. Unlike last time, you didn’t stop. Curious students watched you two pass while James tried to match your pace.
“Hear me out, please.”
“I said all I wanted to say, Potter. Let’s stay out of each other’s way from now on.”
“After you let me explain,” James pleaded.
You laughed. “Nothing you tell me will change my mind. I won’t believe anything that comes out of your mouth.” You gave him an annoyed look.
Still, James was not planning on giving up. You weren’t the only determined one here. He grabbed your arm and dragged you into a room. Your eyes squinted and gave him the dirtiest look they could. James immediately let go of you, hands up in defence, a string of apologies following suit.
You glared at him and went to walk straight out of the room when James pulled you back again, and this time, he cupped the sides of your face, and pressed his lips to yours.
For a moment, you hesitated, utterly confused and surprisingly rather okay with the unwarranted kiss. And then anger hit you. Did he bloody think this would woo you, and sweep you off your feet and make everything alright? How dare he kiss you in attempt to manipulate you. You slapped him across the face in shock less than a second later. James blinked back at you in horror at his own actions.
“Godric, no- I- I am so bloody sorry, I shouldn’t have- I’m- I don’t know what went through my head, please wait-” You slammed the door in his face when you left. James hit his head softly against the door. And then he hit it again but a bit harder as he cursed. “What the hell is wrong with you mate,” he groaned to himself. “You bloody git.”
He stared at the dark wood of the door in front of him reluctantly. To be honest, he wouldn’t mind just staying in the room to rot away, how was he going to face you now?
“Lily, please go in my place,” he begged the redhead. “I’ll take your Tuesday shift, I promise.”
Lily shook her head. “Stop being a baby, James. You reap what you sow and I’m not patrolling tonight.” She walked past James and then turned back around.
“Some friendly advice, James, stop being so pushy. No is no, and it might have been cute as 11-year-olds, but not anymore. We’re no longer kids. But good luck.”
James reluctantly dragged himself towards the Great Hall where he could see you pick your nails in front of the door. He felt ashamed, guilty, and absolutely not ready to look you in the eye.
“Hi,” he awkwardly managed. “So about-“
“You’re late. Let’s get a move on it.” You cut him off.
“Right, yeah, we should do that- patrolling.”
It was quiet, not a word spoken between the two of you as James trailed half a step behind you. He glanced at the side of your face. Shadows and light flickered across your face every time you passed a torch.
The silence of the castle did him good, he realised. He’d much rather walk in silence next to you, than be in the midst of all that chaos that was going on right now. He smiled and stuffed his hands in his pocket happily.
“What are you smiling about,” you asked, a frown on your face.
“Hm? What? Oh, sorry.” The smile dropped of James’ face.
“Well, you don’t have to stop smiling because I said so,” you shot him a strange look. “I just wanted to know what’s so funny.”
“Oh, it’s nothing.” A beat. And then, “Lily told me to stop trying to apologise to you if you don’t want to hear it.”
You considered his words. You supposed you mostly wanted someone to be angry at. You didn’t want to hear James out and then maybe see that your anger was misdirected. You wanted to stay bitter.
“I don’t.”
“Okay, well, I’ll stop.”
“Good.”
Despite the fact that he hadn’t been able to apologise, and nothing had been cleared up between the two of you, both of you felt yourselves relax a little more. You continued to roam the corridors in silence.
The next three patrols were spent in the same basked silence, occasionally one or two words exchanged. James had so many things he wanted to tell you, but he didn’t want to ruin anything. And then you suddenly spoke up again.
“Good luck tomorrow.”
James perked up at your words. “Thank you,” he grinned at you gratefully. “Are you going to watch the game?”
You shook your head. “No, I’ll be helping out in the infirmary.”
“Did you finish your herbal research then?”
Your eyes flickered up at him in surprise. “Yeah, Madame Pomfrey and I will put it to test.” James nodded along.
“Well, if you ever need a patient, I’d volunteer,” he joked. He watched in triumph as you shook your head in amusement.
“Better check your broom for hexes tomorrow,” you replied. “wouldn’t want you to fall off your broom and break a bone or two.” James snorted.
You pulled the curtain to the side with an exasperated expression. “I was only kidding Yesterday, Potter. What on earth are you doing here.”
James gave you a weak smile, trying to hide the pain in his arm and ribs. “Volunteering to be your very first patient, of course.”
“Tell me you didn’t break your bones on purpose,” you squinted your eyes at him.
“I didn’t break my bones on purpose,” James obediently replied. He shifted in curiosity as you rummaged through a cabinet. “Is this not fixable with any spells?” He pondered when he saw you pull out several vials.
“Externally, yes. But you’d be in the same excruciating pain as if they were still broken. You motioned towards the vials. “Hence the herbal potions.”
“Is that the one with the Nettle and Dittany?” James nodded his head to the bottle on the left.
You hummed in approval, not bothering to hide the fact that you were impressed. “Who knows, Potter. Maybe you have a future of a healer as well.” James beamed in pride at your compliment.
“Just keeping my options open.” James sighed happily. He was glad that he could joke around with you again. You tapped a bottle against his cheek. He let you pour the potion into his mouth.
“Now what?”
“Now we wait.” You pulled out a stool and sat down with a notebook in case you needed to take notes of the effects of the potion. At one point, you must have fallen asleep with your face buried on James’ infirmary bed. A strand of hair was tickling your nose and you huffed to get it out of the way. James shifted to tuck it away with his non-injured hand.
You opened your eyes and jumped up. You looked around disoriented and when your eyes landed on James, who had tilted his head, you felt embarrassment creep up on you. “I’m terribly sorry, that was unprofessional of me. Are you feeling any better?”
James nodded. He sat up to prove it, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. “All better. And if you get to apologise, so do I, right?” He looked at you hopefully, internally praying that you wouldn’t just march out straight away. “Will you hear me out?”
You sighed, knowing what would come next, but this time you sat down on the stool again instead of walking away.
“I didn’t know.” When you didn’t respond, he repeated himself. “I didn’t know it was you, and I didn’t know it was going to be published in the newspaper because I wouldn’t do that- you know that I wouldn’t.”
He looked at you and saw you staring back at him. He took it as a sign to continue and cleared his throat. It felt so dry all of a sudden. You quietly reached for a cup of water and handed it to him. James took a sip, a deep breath, and started to ramble on without breaks.
“Sirius found your parchment and then you sisters found it too, but I didn’t. I really didn’t. Sirius said they had already run off and he tried to fix it on his own, so he didn’t tell me, and I only found out right before you did and I would never have written such a mean article about you, because we’re friends- well, at the very least I considered us friends- and I just wanted you to like me because-” James stopped.
“What, you fancy me?” you rhetorically commented.
James’ heart stopped and his face flushed. “No, of course not! I just- Well, I don’t know- It’s, uh I guess I just,” James tried to form a coherent answer, trying to weigh what answer would scare you away.
You frowned and let your eyes flicker across his face. “Stop it,” you shook your head in denial.
“Would it be so bad?” James murmured. “I didn’t know. But I know I liked the girl behind the paper. And I know I liked my patrol partner.” He hesitated and took a step forward. “I think you liked me too, before you knew my name.”
“Yeah,” you replied. “Before I knew your name. Once I learned it, I no longer did,” you lied. “Because we would never work. Every student said so. All the whispers and comments, insults and rumour were right.”
James shook his head.
“So, date me to spite them. Prove them wrong,” It was a pathetic attempt, but he saw the consideration flash in your eyes, and the more he thought about it, the more he started to get convinced that this was a decent idea.
“You’d have us enter a fake relationship to spite everyone?”
“It wouldn’t be fake to me,” James shrugged, getting more confident by your open attitude. “And who knows, maybe I can convince you that the guy from the paper is still inside of me.”
“This is so stupid,” you shook your head.
“Guess what,” Sirius asked Remus, he covered the page of the book Remus was reading to capture his attention.
Remus slapped Sirius’ hand away. “What,” he replied curtly. Sirius moved to sit on the table of the library. “Are you angry?”
“Mildly annoyed, yes.”
“Because…” Sirius trailed off unsurely. He hoped that Remus would finish the sentence for him, which, luckily for Sirius, Remus did.
“Because I think it’s time you guys stop pestering her. I know you planned to get James in the infirmary. Leave her be, you’ve done enough damage as it is.” He sounded disapproving. Sirius dropped himself back on the table, laying across it as if he was a sacrifice on an altar.
“Prongs likes her.”
“Yeah? Well, he’s handling it terribly,” Remus drily remarked. He took off his glasses and started to wipe them with the hem of his sweater. Sirius patted his pockets, reached into his left one and handed Remus a cleaning cloth for glasses.
“Why are you guys nice to me,” Remus asked quietly.
“What are you talking about Moony, you’re our best friend?”
“I know, but why?” Remus lowered his voice. “I’m a werewolf, aren’t I? I’m a literal monster. So why are you nice to me. But somehow feel the need to keep pranking and bullying Slytherin students? We’re in our last year. Don’t you think we should grow up?” And with ‘we’, he meant ‘Sirius and James’.
‘I know, Moony.”
“Do you now?”
“I think I’m going to talk to Regulus.”
Remus choked on his spit. “I’m sorry, Pads, you’re what?”
“I just don’t want to be like L/N’s siblings. I know I sort of am, but I don’t want to be. And you said we should start being nicer right?”
“Pads, last time you said something to him, he literally hexed you.”
“I insulted him,” Sirius heard himself say and he felt weird for a moment.
“He’s after your ass during every Quidditch game, trying to knock you off your broom.”
“Well, that’s just the point of Quidditch,” Sirius defended again.
Remus smiled at Sirius. “Alright, just be careful. Mid-terms are coming up and I’m too busy with studies to fix you up again.”
Sirius grinned. “If all goes well with Prongs, I could ask L/N to patch me up.” Remus threw a quill at him. “I think I’ll go find L/N later, see if she knows where my brother is.”
The door opened and Remus looked behind him. He did a double take and put his glasses back on to make sure he was seeing things correctly. Sirius was still laying on the table, looking at the ceiling.
“I think I’ve found her,” Remus remarked, uncertainly.
Sirius sat up and gaped at the sight on you and James, walking into the library together while talking. James was holding a pile of books and by the colour of the cover, he knew that those were not James’.
“I’m sorry, did I miss something?”
You looked up in alarm at the words and found Sirius and Remus sitting at a table in the corner. “We talked it out,” you nonchalantly mentioned. Remus gave you a smile and Sirius just stared at you. Then; “Hell yeah, Prongs, I knew you had it in you to confess.” Sirius jumped off the table and patted you on the back with a grin.
You laughed back uncertainly and looked at James with questioning eyes. James looked back at you, reassuringly. He moved all of your books to one hand and guided you to a seat with the other.
“Where’s Regulus,” Sirius asked immediately as soon as you sat down.
You raised your eyebrows. “He’s in the astronomy tower. Didn’t want to join James and I to the library.” You smiled at recollection of the younger Black’s reaction to you and James.
“No way.” He had replied. “What are you two planning?” James had looked at Regulus with an offended look. “What are you talking about? I fancy Y/N and she fancies me, so we decided to make it official.”
“Yeah, I’ll believe you fancy Y/N, but there is just no way she would enter a relationship with you of all people. What’s the deal.”
Sirius nodded. “Well,” he started, “I mean, if he wants to, he uh, the library is a public space, so he could join. If he wants.” Sirius awkwardly sat down on a chair. You squinted your eyes at him. “I’ll be sure to let him know,” you said. You watched as Sirius puffed out a sigh in relief.
You glanced down at the messy scribbles on Sirius’ paper and raised your eyebrows. You’d imagined that the elder Black would have a better handwriting than that. “Anyway, do you need help with Transfiguration as well?”
The news of your relationship spread like fire. Your sisters both received it with a sour look on their faces. “He’ll see we were right, and he’ll leave you again,” they said, purposely loud enough for you to hear it. James had just entered the room and walked straight past them towards you with a flower. He dropped it next to you and sat down beside you.
Against your will, your heart made a small jump and the corners of your mouth tugged upwards. James’ eyes flickered towards your lips and quickly looked away happily. Then he leaned in a little and whispered, “We’re not breaking up if it’s up to me.”
He shifted in his seat, subtly scooting over closer to you. “Go on a date with me tonight,” James whispered.
“We don’t have time tonight. Patrol, remember?” You argued back.
James grinned and shook his head. “Afterwards.”
“It’s past bedtime afterwards. I will not-”
“Sneak around the castle and get caught, I know. But you forget that I have an invisibility cloak.”
You laughed this time. “I’m almost tempted to take 20 points off Gryffindor for your outrageous plan.” Your eyes twinkled and James joined in. He put his hand over his heart in fake shock. “You wouldn’t do that to your boyfriend,” he squinted his eyes, challenging you.
“If he misbehaves,” you answer amusedly. But then you hummed in thought. “Fine, I’ll bite, what do you have in mind.”
James’ grin widened. “The lake’s still frozen,” he whispered. You deadpanned. “I can’t skate.”
James leaned his head against you. “Exactly, it’s the perfect chance for me to show you my gentlemanly skills and woo you.” You turned your head and breathed in the smell of James’ shampoo. "You just want an excuse to hold my hand," you mumbled in his hair. You could feel James smile against your shoulder. “I’m your boyfriend, I don’t need excuses,” he joked.
James swore his heartrate sped up an unhealthy amount when you confirmed, “No you don’t.”
He was absolutely beaming next to you as you were patrolling down the corridor, hand in hand. Your eyes flickered over to James once in a while. It was suspicious to you that he’d been quiet the entire time. James on the other hand was just looking at your intertwined hands with interest.
“Never held hands with a girl before, Potter?” You laughed, but no venom was found in your voice.
James nodded. “Never held hands with a girl before,” he confirmed, not ashamed at all for it. Why should he. You looked at him with curiosity. “What about Lily?”
James snorted. “Have you ever seen us hold hands?”
“Nope,” you popped the ‘p’.
“I was stressing a lot about being a good boyfriend, my hands got really sweaty,” James bashfully explained. You lifted both your hands and squeezed his hand a few times. “You don’t stress about being a good boyfriend for me?” you couldn’t help but ask. You immediately groaned internally and looked straight to the floor, intently watching your feet as they simply fascinatingly put one in front of the other. I mean, have you ever seen something so-. James wasn’t having it.
“’m not stressing with you. I have a pretty good feeling about us.” He sighed contently. You huffed. “Well, I have high standards, and I’ve been told I’m pretty high maintenance, Potter.” You stuck your nose in the air haughtily.
“First, you should stop calling me Potter,” he remarked.
“James,” you nodded. A chill ran up his spine. “And second?” you inquired.
“Second?”
“Second,” you looked at him expectantly.
“Oh! Right, second; I didn’t know you had a relationship before?” And just as soon as those words left his lips, he cussed himself out in his head. Great, now he seemed either a twat as if he couldn’t believe someone like you could have a relationship, or a twat who was jealous and obsessive. And it’s only the first week. James averted his eyes to the wall on his left. Ah yes, the wall seems to be made of stone. Very sturdy, very wall-like-
“No, I’ve been single pretty much my whole life.” You put on your usual sour face, and vaguely gestured to it. “Not very approachable, as I prefer.”
“Then who calls you high maintenance?” James thought bitterly, feeling the need to defend you. “Calm down, prince Charming,” you reassured him with a laugh. Maybe you could see the charm in his recklessness. “I can fight my own battles. And basically, everyone calls me high maintenance.”
The two of you walked side by side in silence again, making your way to the prefect room. You rummaged through a drawer, pulled out a document and started to fill it in. James leaned against the table. “Where do you go during Spring Break? Do you stay at Hogwarts? Because I can also stay at Hogwarts to keep you company, you know.”
“I have my own apartment.”
“You’re not even of age yet,” James pointed out, trying to hide his disappointment unsuccessfully at a missed opportunity of spending time with you.
“Professor McGonagall vouched for me,” you replied. James’ eyebrows flew up. “McGonagall?” He asked in disbelief. You just hummed in reply while you flipped the page to continue filling in the report.
“Well, if you want you can come with me?” You stopped writing and looked up at him intently. As if you were searching his face for any hidden intentions. When you didn’t find any, you gave him an apologetic look.
“That’s kind of you, James,” you smiled. “But I have Regulus staying with me.”
“He doesn’t stay at the Black manor?” James was surprised. You tilted your head. “Tell me, does Sirius stay at the Black manor?”
James quickly shut his mouth as realization dawned on him. Oh.
“Well,” he awkwardly shifted. “You’re both welcome,” he offered. You shook your head in laughing at the mental image. The thought of Regulus and Sirius living together for two weeks was just hilarious.
“I’m done, we can go.”
“Alright, I just need to pick up my invisibility cloak from the Gryffindor common room.”
“I’ll wait here,” you nodded. James offered you a strange look.
“What?” You asked, looking up at him.
“You’re not going with me?”
“What all the way up to the third floor? I think not,” you snorted, plopping down on a chair, and making yourself comfortable.
James huffed and didn’t move. “But what if something happens to me on the way there?” He dramatically sat down next to you on a different chair.
“What on earth could happen to you on the way to your room. This is Hogwarts, you know. The safest place in England probably.”
“What if a monster attacks me, and then I can’t come back, and you’ll think that I stood you up?” James retorted with a pout.
You shook your head and pinched the bridge of you nose. “There are no monsters in this castle, James, where do you think we are? You’re not going to run into a Basilisk on your way.”
James squinted his eyes at you. “But can you promise me that with 100% certainty?” You rolled your eyes in response. “Of course not, but would you take me with you and expose me to such dangers?” you sarcastically retorted.
“Well, technically speaking, and I’m not saying all Slytherins,” James held up his hands at your narrowed eyes. “Snakes are kind of your thing, right?” You closed your eyes. “Charming, you are. Let’s just go,” you sighed.
James grinned in victory as he held the door open for you. “For the record, I would totally protect you from a Basilisk.”
“If you say so.”
Sirius sat up in bed when the door opened, but no one came in. “Hey Prongs, how was ice skating?”
James removed the invisibility cloak to reveal your shivering form. Both of you drenched from head to toe, water still dripping from the locks in front of his eyes. “Got pulled under,” he stressed. “I didn’t know where to take her, I couldn’t let her clean record be tainted for being out past bedtime because of me, and I don’t know the Slytherin password, so I brought her here,” he started to ramble in a loud whisper.
Remus grumbled as he sat up too. “Bloody hell, Prongs, did you take her to the black lake or what?” And when James didn’t respond, “Mate, what is wrong with you.” He got up and walked to the bathroom to get a few dry towels to wrap you in.
James discarded his soaked clothes and dried himself off before putting on pyjamas. Then the three of them stared awkwardly at each other. “Well, she needs to get out of those cold clothes,” Remus remarked. Sirius stepped back. “Yeah, not my girl, not my duty,” he walked over to his bed and dropped down on it.
“Right.”
You woke up and the first thing you noticed was the red colours all around you. You sat up suddenly and blinked a few times. What happened? Oh, right. A hand had broken through the ice, wrapped itself around your ankle and harshly pulled you down into the freezing depths. So that means you’re either dead, or James got you out and brought you to the Gryffindor dorms instead of the infirmary because he kept your clean records in mind. Your heart filled with appreciation at the thought of that.
You looked around and found James on the floor next to you. He was curled up in an extra blanket, but it must be uncomfortable. You went to pull out your wand when you realised that you were wearing his sweater. The little shit changed your clothes, you huffed.
You quietly got up, found your clothes drying in the bathroom and slipped out your wand. With a quick levitation spell, you gently tucked James back into his own bed. Your eyes fell on the two parchments on the nightstand, and you allowed a nostalgic smile to adorn your face. You moved his hair out of the way and let your eyes rest on his peaceful face. Realising you were being creepy, you hastily turned around and snuck out of the room with your clothes and a rolled-up parchment.
“And where have you been,” Regulus sat on the common room armchair in front of the door. He looked like he hadn’t properly slept, and his tone was sharp. “And what atrocity are you wearing. Tell me you didn’t sleep with him?”
“You’re my brother, Regulus, not my mother,” you teased him. You pulled out a chair to sit next to him. “And no, I went skating, fell into the water, blacked out and woke up alive in the Gryffindor dorm. So don’t hex James, if anything you can thank him.”
There was a beat of silence. “I’m glad you’re okay, I was worried.”
“I’m sorry for worrying you. Did you stay up all night?”
“Yes, but mostly because I wanted to tell you something.” You didn’t immediately reply, waiting for Regulus to continue on his own instead.
“Sirius came up to the astronomy tower yesterday evening,” he quietly said. His voice sounded confused, as if he was still unsure of what had actually occurred.
“Are you okay?”
“Of course, I’m okay,” Regulus immediately said. “It’s just that he apologized.” He shrugged. “You think he meant it?”
You thought it over. “I think he did. He asked me last week you know. Where you are, and that if you ever want to join us in the library, you can.” Regulus nodded deep in thought.
“You know, James actually invited both of us over for the Spring Break.” You looked at Regulus to gauge his reaction to that. He looked slightly interested, though he tried to hide it.
“I suppose it’s still a month away, so we’ll see what we want then.”
You nodded and then got up off the chair. “I’m going to change into something else, before my fellow house students want to jinx me,” you said.
“You’re dating James Potter; people already want to jinx you.”
You winked at him. “Well, I’ll be damned, you’re absolutely right. Isn’t that funny? You know what, let them try,” you challenged them as you smoothened James’ sweater.
James woke up and sat up straight in bed, confused. How did he get here? He Looked at the end of his bed and saw it still neatly tucked in- hospital corners. His lips twitched up. You had left, he realised, but you’d tucked him in. He let himself fall back onto his pillow and turned his head to the side. Then he frowned, put on his glasses, and grabbed the parchment. In your lovely handwriting was a message.
Maybe not a Basilisk, but you protected me as you said. Thank you, James. (All things considered, I enjoyed last night.)
James’ eyes traced the words before he carefully placed the parchment under his pillow with a giddy feeling in his heart.
James found you in the library with Remus. His heart skipped a beat when he saw that you were still wearing his sweater. Red looked out of place on you and James absolutely loved it. Sirius shared a look with him and then the both of them decided to sneak up on the two of you, simultaneously stealing your books from under you.
You and Remus narrowed your eyes at the both of them. “I am this close to kicking you guys.” You held up your hand to show your thumb and finger pressed together. James shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “But they’re touching,” he hesitantly responded. Sirius elbowed him in the ribs and quickly handed Remus both your books back.
You sarcastically faked a gasp. “Oh, Merlin, you’re right, they appear to be.”
James cheekily grinned and pressed a kiss to your temple. “You wouldn’t hurt your knight in shining armour,” he bragged, but without any real arrogance laced in his tone. You flipped him off with a grin and pulled out a chair for him next to you. “You’re late,” you airily said.
Sirius suddenly straightened up, his attention fixed on someone behind you. You turned around and waved Regulus over. “Come join us, Reg.”
Three weeks flew by in a blur, but- even though you’ve said this so often now- your were really enjoying your time at Hogwarts again. People’s gossips and predictions about yours and James’ relationship had turned into quiet whispers and envy.
James stood up for you on multiple occasions- after letting you have a go at the imbeciles of course. You had finally gone to a Quidditch game to support James, though of course not when they were playing against Slytherin. You had spent more time in the infirmary and James had joined you a few times by hanging out on one of the empty beds, occasionally handing you an ingredient such as Wolfsbane.
After having established that you absolutely loved hugs, James was always less that a step behind you, ready to give you the affection that you were too proud for to admit you wanted. You had been a frequent visitor to the boys’ dorms as well, making yourself comfortable in James’ arms as you dozed off for a nap. On other nights, you have even managed to persuade Regulus to join a handful of times as well. You wondered what would happen when James would graduate before you, but tried not to think much of it.
“So, we are definitely going to Hogsmeade together this week, right?” James popped up behind you and pressed a kiss to your cheek.
“How scandalous, are you asking me out on a date?”
“Yeah, why? You have a boyfriend or something?” James humoured you.
“Or something,” you joked. The innocent comment hit both you and James at the same time. A reminder that you two were in fact technically not really dating. You shook the thought away.
“I’ll see you at 11 o’clock,” you replied.
James grinned, “I’ll be there five minutes earlier.”
True to his words, he was waiting for you in the courtyard when you arrived on the dot. James offered you his arm and you linked yours through his.
“James?” James hummed in reply. “Does your offer about Spring Break still stand? I mean, I know it’s next week already, and it’s sort of short notice-”
James perked up. “Yes!” he said, a little too quickly and enthusiastic. He cleared his throat and lowered his volume. “Yes, you and Regulus can still come.”
You sighed and nodded in relief. “Right, because Reg and I have been talking and we might take you up on that offer.”
It was evening by the time you and James made your way back to Hogwarts. James had his arm wrapped around your shoulders, and you held his hand. James pressed a kiss to your temple every now and then. “What happened to the glass slippers?” He suddenly asked.
“They broke.”
“They broke?”
“Yep.”
“But didn’t you enchant them?”
“I did, but I was so angry at you that I smashed them to pieces against the wall like over two months ago.”
“Oh… But have you changed your mind since then?” James decided to finally ask you.
“About what?”.
“Me, and us.”
You looked at James and quietly admired him. James kept his eyes straight in front of him, too scared to look at you and see your reaction.
“Well, we are walking together, coming back from Hogsmeade. There’s not a student in sight and yet we are still holding hands,” You light-heartedly replied with a teasing smile. You squeezed his hand for good measure. It seemed enough to make James look at you.
“I’d say we’re pretty good friends-”
“I’m in love with you.”
You froze in your tracks and let go of James’ hand. Well, that took you by surprise. Fancying someone and claiming to be in love with someone- not loving but being in love- that was a next level. You smiled amusedly, successfully hiding your insecurities. “James, you’re not in love with me.”
James frowned at your response. He’d accept your rejection, but not you doubting his feelings.
“Yes, I am,” he stubbornly responded.
“No, you’re not,” you retorted, equally stubborn.
“Am too.”
“You’re not, James,” you exasperatedly said. “You’re not in love, you just fancy me because you’re comfortable.” You shrugged awkwardly. "And you only feel comfortable with me because I know so much about you. Because you poured your heart out to a stranger, and it so happened to be me.”
James bit his cheek, considering your words. Then he grinned and nodded. Your heart dropped, but not as much as it could have, because you had already prepared yourself for this. The joy behind setting yourself up for disappointment by never letting yourself get your hopes up.
“Yeah, I’m really comfortable with you.” He agreed. “Isn’t that great? Isn’t that love too? Being comfortable to the point you don’t feel the need to keep secrets anymore, where you feel the most accepted? The most at ease?”
You stared at James then cleared your throat. “So, when did you start being all knowledgeable and romantic?”
James snorted. You were adorable when you were awkward. “I’m the most comfortable with you,” he earnestly confessed to you. He carefully, as if to not scare you away, put a step forward and reached for your hand. He squeezed it softly. I mean it.
James felt you pull your hand back and bit his lip, forcing it to curl up into an accepting smile. “Right,” he cleared his throat as he tried to form a reply. But you weren’t done yet. You pulled back your hand and then threw both your arms around James’ neck as your brought him in a tight hug. You dipped your head down into the crook of his neck.
“And I’m the most vulnerable with you,” you mumbled against his skin. James sighed in relief, happiness, and love. He wrapped his arms around you protectively, as if to shield you in response.
You tilted your head sideways as you looked at James who was in front of you, down on one knee in your garden. James looked beautiful. His cheeks were slightly coloured from the cold and his hands held a small box with a ring.
“Love?” He asked, waving his hand in front of you, trying to get your attention. He didn’t sound nervous at all, in fact, he felt the most relaxed he’d ever been. This was definitely the future he’d imagined when he’d watched you laugh with his dad while bringing in the groceries. “My knee is getting numb from the cold, love. So, if you could just say yes or no,” he cheekily grinned.
You hummed in thought and then you replied, “Well, isn’t marriage a little too soon?” Your grin widened and spread across your face. “I mean, you’ve yet to officially ask me to be your real girlfriend.”
“Wait what-”
The end :)
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#james potter x reader#james potter x you#james potter x fem!reader#james potter x y/n#james potter imagine#james potter fic#james potter angst#james potter fluff#marauders era#marauders#james potter fanfiction#marauders x reader#james potter fanfic#young james potter x reader#young james potter#marauder x reader
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Summary: During your shift you overhear a conversation that kind of sends you spiraling.
Warnings: Language, angst, self-esteem issues, hurt with MAJOR comfort, and protective Steve.
Pairings: Steve Harrington x Female Reader
Wordcount: 1,924
A/N: Just a little something, cause’ I’m on my period and feeling it…
You aren’t acting like your usual self - zero pep in your step, no smiles from anything or for anyone. Steve doesn’t expect that from you all of the time, but he can sense something is majorly wrong. You simply give him a whispered hey as you climb into the beemer’s passenger, buckling your seatbelt and lowering your gaze to the small wallet you’d brought with you today. It’s when he leans across the console, leather creaking under his movements, to kiss you - that he is for surely locked in on something being up with you. You’re pulling yourself away from his lips before they can even touch your cheek.
At the start of your relationship, Steve was always doing checklists, to see if you were unnerved about, even the smallest of things (which never had anything to do with him, half the time, as he found out). He tried to go over what he could’ve done wrong, how he needed to fix that. But as the trust with the new stage of your relationship grew, the romance had cemented itself - Steve felt like he had to do this less and less with you. You were a team - secure and honest.
You, however, are caught into the expanse of your head, strangled by those vines that are always undoing themselves from their silence to torment you. Copious, self-negative, berating thoughts that are meant to tear you apart. You manage to see Steve frown in your peripheral, which makes your lips part in an attempt to start your explanation. He’s more than ready to receive.
“Hey, Harrington. You have a few minutes?”
That same sugary, sickly sweet voice from minutes prior. You and your boyfriend both look in time to see her blond hair lean into the window, arms propped, pink lined lips speaking, bangles accentuated on her thin wrists, and the overpowering scent of her fruity perfume. Your chest burns with the nerve of her, throat watering with unshed tears — your body feeling as if it’s slipped a flight of stairs for everyone to witness, see your smoldering humiliation as it crackles across your chest. Old Steve might be cocky, might even be rude. But your best-friend turned boyfriend - he is no longer that way.
“What’s up? Everything okay?” He’s a little hesitant, his focus coming back onto you. His knee juts from his foot bouncing on the floor, eager to leave her over bearing interjection into your conversation. He’s pissed at her and her friend standing idly nearby, as you begin to shut down what you were about to open up to him about.
Her friend giggles from beside her and you audibly swallow, using your pinky to play with the newest charm Steve had added to your bracelet (a little baseball glove, because you’re always ‘catching his heart’). It’s your tell-tale nervous sign, he’s aware. The girl in the window starts talking again before he can say anything. She shows off neon pink talons for nails, pearly whites grinning at Steve. “I just got these done about a half an hour ago. And something is wrong with my car, so I obviously need to pop the hood, but I don’t want to ruin them. Like, you know what I mean?”
The eye roll that leaves you, all emotions aside, Steve is amused by. He reaches for your hand, and you let him squeeze. “Do you mind, baby? I’ll just pop the hood and they can call someone if it needs something else done.”
This makes you feel a little better, the girl having to hide her displeasure underneath her smile, which turns into a smirk as Steve exits the car and follows them to her convertible. She makes a show in her tight tube top and jean shorts, not getting to the hood immediately. You only imagine what they’re saying to Steve. But you do remember what they’ve just said about you.
“I mean, he picks her up daily and I don’t even think she offers him gas money.”
You’d stopped organizing the front candy counter to lean around and listen in. Steve picks you up everyday, never asking for anything return - even if you always offer. They have to mean you, right? Your breath had started quickening, focus wavering. The rush of burgundy is within your sights as he pulls up storefront, shades on, head tilted back, arm out the window with a cigarette in hand.
“He’s dating her though, so why would she?”
“Please. He needs to be asked if he is. I don’t buy it, at all. I mean, Nancy Wheeler was a goody two shoes, but at least she was pretty. Buckley is a fucking motor mouth, but she’s also okay.”
Former insecurities when you got together. Even as a friend as you crushed on him, these thoughts had plagued you. You were heated, body light.
“He never dated Buckley.”
A deep sigh. “Obviously, but he clung to her like a puppy. He’s downgraded with this one. She’s been hanging on him for years and I don’t know if he warrants it or just tolerates it.”
Don’t make any noise, don’t say a word. You should stop listening, say something. All things that you didn’t do, just kept listening to them dump on you.
“She’s the real reason Harrington struck out all the time. WHO the fuck wants to date someone that allows a loser like that to be attached to their hip non-stop? I mean, is it a kind, charitable thing to do? Sure. But he needs to draw a line between the good and the bad, babe.”
Your dress had felt to tight on your body - one you wore to surprise Steve today. Excited to be with him for the weekend, casting aside conflicting schedules. Your face became dull, heartbeat slowing, eyes glossing over. You swore you could taste the acidic bile of breakfast on your tongue.
“She’s been that ugly two for one special, kills all of his chances by hanging around him. The real reason he struck out so much.”
You turn your back to the conversation, despite still having been able to hear it. No use in trying to block it out, for it had found you in surround sound.
“Didn’t he ask you on a date, Chelsea? And you turned him down?”
She scoffed. “My point exactly. She makes him less appealing. He’s just with her because he thinks that he should be, and because she’s the one that’s around him too much. He peaked in high school, but she’s certainly holding that fine ass of his back. Can you imagine the sex he’s wasting on that?”
You’re so caught up in your momentary memories, that you don’t even see Steve as he piles back into the car, his entire body lax, but his shoulders tense. His face holds a reserved softness for you. His voice, though, that takes on an entirely different undertone of mixed meanings - somewhere between a raging anger and a featherlight craving to provide solace. He’s saying something that takes you a few seconds to catch up with, your blurred vision noticeable. It confirms his suspicions that he’d accumulated by being hit on at the girl’s car.
“They came from your store, didn’t they? What did they say to you?” He sighs, trying to let that show, so that you don’t mistake it for annoyance.
“It’s… nothing. I’m okay.“
“Baby…” The way it’s practically pled, it makes you look at him. You meet concerned, slightly widened, mossy eyes, sun reflected in the enriching pools. His grown out caramel hair is a mess, shades pushed back to sit atop, his sun kissed skin visible through his white Kenny G shirt, along with overgrown chest hair, his chain length bracelet and neck chain (a gift from you for his latest birthday), and his ripped jeans he’d cut to make capri shorts.
He definitely shouldn’t be yours.
You reach to fiddle with the chain, that nervous habit back again. And Steve settles into your touch as it drums across his jugular. He tilts his head to kiss to the side of your fingers when they brush by. You pause to retreat, but he’s swift to take your hand in his, playing with your bracelet this time. How massive he looks in comparison.
You feel a calloused finger brush beneath your chin, bringing it up. His eyes are darting back and forth across your face. “Tell me what they said to you. I know that’s why you’re upset.”
“Were they talking about me?” Immediate humiliation settles in.
He’s quick to correct. “No, no. I just mean that when they started in with the flirting after I opened the hood, I was uncomfortable and I know you were. And I also remember that they did come from the video store, too.”
Your voice breaks and he slides his spare hand to your neck’s nape, bringing your forehead to his as you begin to tell him everything that was said. Safe to say, he’s NOT happy by the time that you’re finished, and he does a double take to look for their car. It’s already gone and he curses. “Shit. That’s fucking bullshit!”
He can’t fathom the process that he went through as you told him each and every single word heard. His tongue is tied, he wants to plead with you to know that it’s not true, that all of those things have NEVER been like that. There’s only one truth. And so, he tries with all his heart to explain it to you.
“God, honey, you have to know that when I’m with you, I don’t see anything else, can’t see anyone else. For years, it’s always just been you. I don’t care about who I was before. The man I am now, he wants his life to be with yours. He’s pretty gone on you, like in a stupid, I’ll almost die for you again, even when you tell me not to - kind of way, and probably more.”
Your heart rate has started speeding up again, caught beneath your breastbone, trying to find your throat, but can’t get through its tightness. You’re openly crying now, to which Steve solves by thumbing away, the bridge of his nose nudging yours, mouth laying his next statement in to cross. “Words, they’re not my strong point, you know that. But I want you to know that I’d learn a fucking dictionary in every single language if it meant I could tell you in better terms, how much you mean to me, how perfect you are, how beautiful, funny, and smart, how sexy, how tough, how loyal, how honest, how creative, how strong, and so much fuckin’ more... How what they said was the farthest thing from the truth, that they’re just jealous, airheaded bimbos.”
You let your palms find his face, the ache in your body causing a prickling in your toes. You’re pliant against his chest as he unbuckles your belt and his, pinching your waist and using his forearm to halfway hoist you middle way over the console to meet his mouth, all the while he’s whispering between every kiss, “I love you. I love you. So fucking much. I love you, honey.”
You don’t have to stop kissing to tell him that you love him back. Steve can feel it in the way that you hold onto him, tears changing, rolling from your cheeks and dripping onto his lips. I love you.
#kristenwrites#my work#my writing#steve harrington#steve harrington blurb#steve harrington drabble#steve harrington fic#steve harrington fanfic#steve harrington fanfiction#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington x female reader#steve harrington x fem!reader#stranger things#stranger things fluff#stranger things blurb#stranger things fic#stranger things drabble#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things fanfic#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x y/n fluff#steve harrington x y/n#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington oneshot#stranger things one shot
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₊˚⊹౨ PTOLEMAEA (C.M.) ৎ ₊˚⊹
warnings: emotional and physical abuse, inappropriate comments (only one), parent issues, confessional themes, religious themes, mentions of miscarriages, alcoholism, cheating and gambling
summary: In a church’s embrace, faith and desire collide. A daughter’s silent struggle beneath parents’ guise, seeks solace in forbidden thoughts.
pairing: charlie mayhew x reader
word count: 2.8k
a/n: umm.. what can I say? I’m just a girl and I am obsessed with Nicholas Chavez so ofc I had to write something for him!! Sorry if there are any inaccuracies I am not a roman catholic Christian, and in no ways do I approve of any kind of religious discrimination or whatsoever!! This is just a work of fanfiction. Just to mention yet again English is not my first language so sorry if there are any mistakes. Feel free to write your thoughts and opinions, requests are open as long as you are respectful!! And as always I hope you enjoy <333
You stood at Sunday morning mass beside your parents, the familiar scent of candles and incense filling the air. Your hair was tied back in a neat ponytail, a delicate bow resting against it—just the way your mother liked it.
You wore a knee-length skirt with an appropriate top, an outfit that aligned with the image of a good Christian girl. You were supposed to be focused on prayer, absorbing the priest’s sermon, but your mind wandered elsewhere.
The morning had already been eventful, and your thoughts kept replaying the chaotic scene at home before you arrived at church.
It had all changed so quickly once you stepped through the church doors. Your mother and father, as if by some silent agreement, shifted into their usual roles.
They greeted neighbors with wide smiles, exchanging pleasantries as though everything in your household was perfectly ordinary. Then, during mass, they stood on either side of you, hands folded in prayer, playing the part of a devout and happy Christian couple.
But it was a charade, and you knew it all too well. Only an hour earlier, their voices had echoed through the house in another heated argument.
Your father, as always, was a shadow of the man you had once imagined he could be. He had wanted a son, a dream he clung to until after your birth. But after several miscarriages, his hope dissolved, replaced by bitterness. His drinking became a constant, and gambling soon followed. He found his escape in these vices, and over time, he drifted further from any sense of family.
Your mother, meanwhile, had her own form of escape. The affairs started when you were still too young to fully understand, but over time, even your father became aware. They would argue and scream, but the fights eventually gave way to indifference. They had stopped trying to fix anything, stopped pretending they even wanted to.
And then there was you. A silent observer, a helpless child who could only watch as her parents’ marriage fell apart piece by piece. You wondered, even at a young age, what you had done wrong. What could you have done differently? Why did you feel like it was your fault?
It wasn’t uncommon for your mother to slap you when things got particularly tense. Your father, too, had his moments—he would make inappropriate comments about your appearance that left you feeling small, but thank God, it never went beyond that.
Still, you tried so hard to be the perfect daughter, the ideal Christian girl. You volunteered at the church, memorized Bible verses, and always said your prayers, hoping that maybe one day it would be enough. Maybe one day Jesus would answer your prayers and fix what was broken.
But as you stood there in church, surrounded by people who had no idea what your life was really like, you felt tired. Tired of pretending, tired of praying for something that never seemed to come.
“Why don’t you focus, sweetheart?” your mother whispered sharply, her breath hot against your ear as she nudged you with her elbow.
“Sorry,” you mumbled, casting your eyes down. You forced yourself to listen to the priest’s voice, though his words washed over you like water over stone. But the truth lingered, always at the back of your mind.
You prayed every day, but sometimes, even you doubted if anyone was listening.
“We talked about this, Y/N. Pull yourself together,” your mother hissed, her voice sharp as she leaned in close.
Then, just as quickly, her face softened into a warm smile when an elderly woman nearby turned to glance your way. The performance was flawless—an image of maternal grace. But you felt the sting of her words sink in, a quiet reminder of how fragile your role in this family really was.
Your attention drifted back to the priest, Father Charlie, whose voice filled the room with conviction. “…Remember, the Lord hears all cries, even those spoken in silence. He sees every tear and knows every sorrow in your heart,” he said, his tone both soothing and firm.
“And He asks that we carry these burdens with faith, for through Him, we are never alone. We are called to forgive, to love, even when it feels impossible. For if He could forgive us, how can we withhold forgiveness from others?”
Father Charlie had been the priest at your church for a few years now, and in that time, he had become somewhat of an enigma to you. He was young, undeniably handsome, with a presence that was both comforting and mysterious.
His words held weight, and you admired him for the way he commanded the attention of the congregation, always knowing what to say.
You were fond of him—perhaps too fond. But you couldn’t entirely blame yourself for it. The girls at your Christian school were the ones who started the gossip.
You thought back to the way they whispered about him, shamelessly thirsting after him as though he were some untouchable prize.
“Did you know he was a personal trainer before he became a priest?” one of the girls had said, wide-eyed.
“What a waste,” another had added, grinning. “Who wouldn’t want to be with a man like him?”
At first, you found their comments disgusting and inappropriate. You tried to dismiss them as nothing more than vulgar fantasies. But then, despite yourself, the idea of Father Charlie as something other than a priest began to creep into your mind.
You imagined what he might have been like before his vow to the church. Your cheeks flushed as the thought of him—of his strong body and sharp features—set your nerves alight, and soon an embarrassing heat bloomed in your body, spreading across your skin.
You prayed it away. You really did. You asked God for guidance, for the strength to rid yourself of these sinful thoughts.
You even tried to crush on someone more suitable, someone your age, but it never lasted. Your mind always wandered back to Father Charlie, back to his deep voice and the way he seemed to command every room he walked into.
As he continued preaching, your gaze lingered on him longer than it should have. For the thousandth time, you marveled at his otherworldly face, the perfect symmetry of his jaw, the way his lips moved as he spoke of forgiveness and grace.
And though you knew better, though you told yourself it was nonsense, you swore you saw something—some glimmer in his eyes when they landed on you.
His gaze lingered, just for a moment, but it was enough to send your heart racing. You shifted uncomfortably in the pew, a wave of guilt and excitement washing over you.
What if he knew?
What if he could sense what you were thinking?
Of course, it was impossible. But each time his eyes flickered in your direction, the thoughts in your head grew louder, more intense, and far more dangerous.
You fought to keep your composure, but it felt like you were unraveling. Even as his voice carried on with words of love and forgiveness, you couldn’t shake the weight of your desires—desires that no prayer seemed capable of silencing.
—
The soft echo of footsteps faded as the last congregants filtered out of the church, leaving behind the lingering scent of incense and the faintest hint of candle wax. You fidgeted with the hem of your skirt, glancing at your parents as they walked toward the car, your mother’s back rigid, your father’s shoulders slumped. A familiar heaviness settled in your chest.
“Aren’t you coming, dear?” Your mother’s voice sliced through the silence, sharp yet feathered with concern.
“Just a moment. I would like to have a word with Father Charlie... alone,” you replied, your voice almost a whisper, tinged with trepidation.
Your mother narrowed her eyes, her expression a mixture of disbelief and irritation. “Oh dear, I’m sure Father Charlie is quite a busy man. You shouldn’t be bothering him with... pointless nonsense.” Her forced smile did little to mask her annoyance.
“Mother, I—”
A throat cleared nearby, interrupting you. You both turned to see Father Charlie standing there, his friendly smile disarming and warm.
“It’s quite alright, Ms. Y/L/N,” he said, his voice a soothing balm. “I am here to listen to everyone’s worries and thoughts. It is a part of my calling.”
Your mother opened her mouth to protest, but Father Charlie cut her off effortlessly. “I assure you I am more than glad to help your daughter with whatever it is.” His gaze shifted to you, filled with an understanding that made your heart flutter.
After a moment of tense silence, your mother relented, though it was clear she was not pleased. “Well, alright. We’ll be waiting with your father in the car. Don’t take too long.” Her words dripped with coldness as she turned to leave, casting one last accusatory glance your way.
“Yes, Mother,” you murmured, your heart pounding.
“Father Charlie,” she nodded, the tone of her voice suggesting she was dismissing him more than acknowledging him. He smiled again, the kind of smile that felt like sunlight breaking through clouds.
“I hope to see you soon, Ms. Y/L/N,” he said, his tone light but sincere.
As the heavy doors of the church swung shut behind your mother, a sigh escaped your lips, heavy with the weight of unspoken words. Father Charlie chuckled softly, the sound like music—a melody far more pleasant than the hymns that had echoed just moments ago. “She is quite the figure,” he observed, amusement dancing in his eyes.
“Oh, that she is…” you muttered, the embarrassment creeping into your cheeks.
“Come, walk with me.” He gestured down the long aisle, and you fell into step beside him, your heart racing as you moved past the rows of empty pews. The church felt different now, as if it were just the two of you in a sacred, intimate space.
For a few moments, silence enveloped you both. The quiet was comfortable, yet heavy with anticipation. Then, Father Charlie broke the stillness. “I don’t mean to rush you, but why did you wish to speak with me?” His voice was gentle, with a hint of curiosity.
You hesitated, the words caught in your throat, feeling more vulnerable than ever. “I—um…” The embarrassment was suffocating.
“It’s alright. No need to rush. Take your time,” he encouraged, his gaze unwavering, offering a safe harbor in the storm of your thoughts.
Taking a deep breath, you tried to steady your racing heart. “Well, I’ve been having some... inadequate thoughts about certain things... and aspects of my life. I’ve tried to pray about it, but it doesn’t seem to help.” The confession spilled out, the weight of guilt and confusion pressing heavily on your chest.
Father Charlie nodded, his expression one of understanding. “That is understandable. Sometimes it is hard for us to connect with the Lord. Temptation is not an easy thing to deal with.” He paused, a shadow crossing his features as if battling something within himself.
“And resisting sin is certainly…” He faltered, the words hanging in the air, unfinished.
“Perhaps coming to a confessional could help?” he suggested, tilting his head slightly, his eyes glinting with a mix of warmth and something else—something deeper.
The thought of confession made your stomach churn, but you felt drawn to him, the connection between you sparking with unexpected intensity. “I don’t know if that’s what I need…” you whispered, your voice barely above a breath.
“Sometimes, sharing our burdens can lighten the load we carry. It’s a safe space, a chance to speak freely. I’m here for you,” he assured, his tone steady and inviting.
You looked up at him, caught in the sincerity of his gaze. “It just feels... wrong, you know? I’ve been trying so hard to be the perfect daughter, the perfect Christian. But I keep failing.”
A flicker of something akin to sympathy crossed his features. “It’s not about perfection, Y/N. We all have our struggles. It’s part of being human. What matters is the intention behind our actions and the effort to seek forgiveness.”
His words resonated within you, echoing the very truths you had been grappling with. “But what if my intentions are... inappropriate?” you confessed, your voice trembling slightly.
Father Charlie stepped a bit closer, his presence enveloping you like a warm embrace. “We all have thoughts that we may not be proud of. It’s what we do with those thoughts that defines us. Have you spoken to anyone about this before?”
You shook your head, feeling exposed. “No, I’ve kept it all inside. I’m afraid of what they might think—especially my mother.”
“Your mother may not understand, but that doesn’t mean you should suffer in silence. You deserve to express your feelings.” His voice was firm, yet tender, grounding you in the moment.
“Do you really think so?” you asked, searching his eyes for reassurance.
“I know so,” he replied, a soft smile breaking across his face. “You are not alone. I’m here, and I’m listening.”
A warmth blossomed in your chest at his words, filling the void of loneliness that had settled within you for so long. “Thank you, Father Charlie,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
He chuckled softly, a sound that wrapped around you like a comforting blanket. “It’s my calling to help. You’re brave for reaching out; that’s a step in the right direction.”
You took a moment to gather your thoughts, the weight of your worries still pressing down but feeling a little lighter. “I just wish I could find a way to... reconcile what I feel with my faith.”
Father Charlie nodded, his expression serious yet encouraging. “That’s a journey many embark on, and it’s not always straightforward. But I believe that through honesty—both with yourself and with God—you can find a path that feels right for you.”
His words hung in the air, resonating within you. “But how do I begin?”
“Perhaps we can start with confession. It’s a way to unburden yourself—an opportunity to speak openly without fear of judgment. I would be honored to guide you through it.”
The thought sent a shiver down your spine, both thrilling and terrifying. “I’ve never done that before,” you admitted, your voice trembling slightly.
“It’s perfectly alright. Everyone starts somewhere. Just remember, it’s a safe space,” he reassured, his eyes locked onto yours, filled with an intensity that made your heart race.
You swallowed hard, feeling the weight of the decision pressing down on you. “Okay... I’ll think about it.”
Father Charlie’s smile widened, a genuine warmth emanating from him. “That’s all I ask. Just take your time.”
You felt a sudden rush of emotions, a mixture of gratitude, fear, and something akin to hope. “Thank you, Father. For listening, for understanding.”
“It’s my pleasure, Y/N,” he replied softly. “Remember, you are not alone in this.”
The moment felt suspended in time, an electric charge hanging in the air between you. You were acutely aware of his presence, the way he seemed to draw you in, making the world outside fade away.
But reality came crashing back as you glanced toward the church doors, where the shadows of your parents loomed. “I should go,” you said reluctantly, the weight of the outside world pressing back in.
“Of course,” he said, his tone understanding, yet a hint of disappointment lingered in his eyes.
As you turned to leave, you felt a sudden urge to say more, to linger in that moment just a little longer. “Father Charlie?”
“Yes?” He looked at you, his expression expectant.
“Can I—can I come back and talk to you again?”
“Anytime, Y/N. My door is always open for you.”
You nodded, a small smile breaking through the uncertainty. “Thank you.”
With one last glance, you stepped toward the heavy doors, your heart racing with the thrill of what you had just shared. As you pushed them open, the sunlight flooded in, illuminating the path ahead.
“See you soon, Y/N,” Father Charlie called after you, his voice wrapping around you like a promise.
You took a deep breath, feeling lighter as you stepped outside, the echoes of your conversation lingering in your mind. The conflict within you still simmered, but for the first time in a long while, you felt a spark of hope.
As you made your way to the car, your mother’s cold gaze met yours, but you held your head high. You were beginning to understand that seeking guidance, even from a handsome priest who stirred feelings you never knew you could possess, was a step toward finding your own truth. And perhaps, just perhaps, you were on the brink of discovering a deeper connection to both your faith and yourself.
© COPYRIGHT BELQVA 2024
SHARING THIS, ANY OF MY OTHER WORKS OR A TRANSLATION OF THEM WITHOUT CONSENT ON THIS OR ANY OTHER PLATFORM IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN !!!
THE PLOT OF GROTESQUERIE OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS EXCEPT FOR THE ONES I CREATED DO NOT BELONG TO ME THIS IS JUST A WORK OF FANFICTION !!!
tags:
#charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew x reader#charlie mayhew x y/n#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas chavez x y/n#grotesquerie#nicholas chavez smut#charlie mayhew smut
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What slashers/villans do when they see their s/o crying
How would: OG!Michael, Brahms, Wesker, Ghostface, Pyramid Head, RZ!Michael and OLD!Michael (2018 movie), react if they saw you crying.
WG: None, just fluff <3
OG!Michael
He was stalking you as usual, it was around 6pm when he heard you talking with someone on the phone.
“Is there anything we can do to fix these, Claire?”
Your voice…were you crying?
“Claire, we’ve been friends since we were 4! Please…”
You definitely were crying by now. Your best friend was cutting the bond between you two
“Ok….ok. I hope you do well in life too. Thanks for the memories. Yeah, yeah…bye bye” Now you were crying your eyes out
Michael saw this and immediately thought of slaughtering whoever was this Claire girl, but he didn’t know were she lived
Instead he looked around, he noticed in one of your backyard bushes some kind of flower. He remembered it from the times you used to play with him cause you both were the same age and neighbors so you used to play hide and seek with him.
He grabbed some of this flowers and sneaked into your house unnoticed. Looked for your room and successfully found it
He decided to leave the little flowers on the nightstand
Since he was in Haddonfield again you knew deep down he was watching you. He never did anything to you tho, that keep you calm
Coming from the bathroom you caught a glimpse of him leaving your house. “Michael…?” He turned around and gave you his signature head tilt.
He then got closer to you, and with one of his hands put a little lock of hair behind your left ear. You smiled at his act
BRAHMS
You were crying on bed that night when he saw you.
“Is something wrong?” He asked. Voice deep
“Uhm…I just found out my childhood pet crossed the rainbow today, and i wasn’t there to be with him.” You said
“Crossed the rainbow…?” He didn’t understand.
“Yeah…when pets passed away we say they crossed the rainbow…so it’s not so sad to think about it.”
“Oh…I see. Can you show me how he looked like?” He asked in his deeper voice but still a little bit childish.
“Of course…” You then showed him the picture of a beautiful and happy dog.
“He looked happy.” He said. You just nod
And with that, he was gone.
You remain laid in the bed a little more before you resumed whatever you were doing before you found out the bad news
When you came back to the bedroom a huge doll that ressambled your loyal dog from your childhood was placed on your bed. Tears threatening to stream down again.
Next to the bed was Brahms, who had his arms behind his back and was idling in the same spot patiently.
“Do you like it?” He asked eagerly to know
“Brahms…” That’s all you could say
Immediately Brahms thought he had done something wrong. He was ready to apologize but your arms around him stopped him.
“Thank you, thank you…” You keep repeating that over and over again
“You’re welcome.” He said returning the hug
Needless to say you slept hugging the doll all night with Brahms being the big spoon.
WESKER
He’s cold and distant, so when he saw you crying he didn’t know what to do
But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care, he just doesn’t know how to show it
He didn’t asked you anything, mind too busy thinking what he could do
He decided that sitting down your side and hold you in his arms would work for him and help you, hopefully
For his surprise, it did work
GHOSTFACE
You didn’t do well on the university today
So when he saw you silently crying, he didn’t say anything or even make noise
He put on normal clothes, gathered some of your favorite snacks and a big coke
He entered your bedroom, situated himself on your bed and put all the food down
“Well, we’re watching a movie tonight. Choose the one of your liking dear.” He said
“You saw me crying right?”
“Yeah I did”
“You got some snaks and coke?” You asked him
“Of I did honey.” He answered
“I love you babe.” You hugged him
“Me too dearheart.”
PYRAMID HEAD
Might seem like a bad guy on the outside but in reality it’s a sweet little boy
The first time he saw you crying, he did everything that could be done to make you feel better
You want Kandy? You got it. You want cuddles? You got it. Anything you want, you get.
If you just want him to listen, he’ll sit next to you, hand on your knee while you take it all out
Occasionally will nod his head to let you know he’s listening
And if after crying you need a bath, he’ll prepare bomb bath, candles and some chocolates, then he’ll carry you to the bath himself.
RZ!MICHAEL
You were a patient in the same hospital as him, even if he didn’t talk you enjoyed his company
The first time he saw you cry when was when you told him that some other patients wouldn’t leave you be
“Can I stay with you for a while please?” You ask
He nods, then he takes you to his bed and tuck you up, he wanted you to take a little nap while he continued with his masks, or that’s what you thought
You were suddenly woken up by the feeling of a finger caressing your cheek
Michael was sitting next to you, his finger still caressing you cheek
He stood up and went straight to his working desk to grab something
He went back to you with a mask on his hand
“For me?” You asked him smiling
He nodded, then looked down
He has made you a mask of your favorite animal
“Oh Michael, that’s so sweet from you”
You didn’t notice but under his own paper mask his cheeks blushed
OLD!MICHAEL(2018)
Whenever you cry for whatever reason this man absents himself. Why? Cause it’s too much for good old Michael to handle
Tho there was this particular time when you were taking care of your friend’s kitten that when the time to took this little fella back to his own family you were crying like hell
You had become attached to this little kitten that you didn’t even want to give him back
Michael couldn’t see this and do nothing, specially when you saw him tending to leave through the principal door and got even sadder
He got an idea
It was like 7pm and you were starting to wonder where Michael was when the sound of a door opening ran through your ears
Michael stood there, in his arms was holding a little thing. From afar you couldn’t distinguish what it was
Not until that little thing turned its little head back to look at you, and your eyes were met with a big orange ones
“Oh my god Michael, you brought me a little kitten?” You asked smiling
The little animal liking Michael’s face was too cute to see
He nodded and reached the kitten to you
Of course you happily took the animal in your arms
Michael wouldn’t admit it, but he melt at the side of you holding the little fella
Well here’s another fic 😗 I hope you like it 😊
Sorry for any misspelling, English it’s not my mother language.
Friendly reminder that requests are open! 🤗
#michael myers x reader#ghostface#ghostface x reader#michael myers#brahms heelshire x reader#brahms heelshire#pyramid head#pyramid head x reader#albert wesker#wesker x reader
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Lie To Girls — Spencer Reid x exbau!reader
slightly based on the song sharpest tool by Sabrina Carpenter but it’s more like the song would fit them right (love me some angst, had to do it.)
cw: angst with fluff at the end, no use of y/n, passes a little bit after JJ confessed her feelings for Spencer. - this isn’t a jj slander, only serves for context.
Spencer sweared to you he was over JJ. The blonde had just confessed her feelings for him in a case, and really, you guys used to be fine, at least until he found out his crush of years actually liked him all this time that passed, that he could’ve had a chance all this time if there was no miss communication between them. God, he didn’t even want to tell you, not that he was afraid with the way you’d react but that he knew it was… wrong, in some way, it was. You took it pretty well, but then he confessed he’d been thinking about it more than usual and that just wouldn’t cut it. Which led to the both of you arguing in the living room of his apartment.
“I — I don’t know what you want!” You shout, a mess of tears, he’s been trying to explain that he didn’t really mean anything he said previously. “Sure, you had a chance, but am I not enough?”
It breaks Spencer’s heart to see you like this — so emotionally distressed because of something he said, something stupid and reckless, and it doesn’t seem like it will get better soon.
“No, I’ve.. I’ve never said that, you’re more than enough to me, I just thought—“ he tries to speak, but he’s cut off by you.
“Thought what?” You take a step closer, you’re so sad that he wishes you hadn’t done that. “She’s married! Jesus — she has kids!” You sniff, his head clenches.
“I know.” He admits, ashamed, head hung low.
“I don’t know what happened between you two but there’s no way of fixing it!” Your words are bitter, and they hurt, but he understands why you’re acting like this, he won’t blame you.
He doesn’t respond to that, you can see the look in his eyes, as if he’s heartbroken, and really you don’t know if it’s because of you or Jennifer, it’s hard to tell, and maybe that is exactly why you hurt him even more with your next words.
“If you want me to leave, I will.”
You take another step closer, Spencer gulps, and when he stays silent, you start crying incessantly, hands up to your face as if you’re ashamed of him seeing you like that — you shouldn’t be, he realises how much he really messed up. He’s hurt, confused, but he didn’t realise how this would affect you, and if anything, you’re both to blame.
Spencer’s a nice guy in your eyes, the perfect boyfriend even through his flaws, you don’t know if it’s because of his personality or really because you’re just madly in love with him, but even now, you can’t see malice in the way he acts. He would never need to lie to you the way he did when he said ‘I don’t love her anymore.’, he would always be a saint to you.
He approaches you finally, pulls you into a tight hug at his chest, places a kiss on top of your head and grips you like you’ll fly away if he doesn’t hold you.
“I’m sorry, okay, I just made a mistake,” he whispers, resting his chin over your hair. “I don’t need anyone else.” He breathes.
“Was just a stupid mistake.”
#spencer reid au#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid angst#spencer reid icons#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid criminal minds#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid smut#spencer reid moodboard#spencer reid x fem!reader smut#spencer reid x plus size reader#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you#spencer reid cm#spencer reid fandom#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fic#mgg fluff#mgg x reader#mgg smut#mgg#mgg fanfiction#mgg x you#mgg x y/n#criminal minds#criminal minds smut#𝜗𝜚: spencer reid#webbluvrsugar
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I’ll cut your f****** balls off!
Masterlist
Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader
Prompt: y/n gets mad when Bruce “accidentally” ends up with his face in Natasha’s boobs 🤨
Warnings: cursing, Bruce slander, jealousy, boobies, fight scene, y/n is more than a bit angry, soft/sensitive y/n at the end
A/N: I legit wish I was him. But I was a little too nice to him in Are you mad? So I decided to throw out some hate. Not proofread 😬
——————————————
Y/n’s pov
I am watching Natasha pour herself a drink from the couch I’m sitting at with a smile on my face. When I see Bruce creep up to the bar to talk to Natasha.
I squint my eyes at his awkward stance and decide that there’s no harm in listening in on their conversation. So I perk up on my super hearing and zone into their words.
“How’d a nice girl like you end up working at a dump like this?”
“Fella done me wrong”
I furrow my eyebrows at Natasha’s words. I know she doesn’t really know how to handle situations like this other than flirting since she was trained to do that, but it still makes me feel uneasy since we’ve been dating for a while now. I also didn’t think I did anything wrong.
“Got a lousy taste in men kid”
“They’re not so bad”
I hope she’s just joking, but what did I do to wrong her if she’s not? Also why is she not correcting him on my pronouns if she’s talking about me?
“Well they have a temper, deep down they’re all fluff. The fact is they’re not like anybody I’ve ever known.”
A look of confusion falls upon my face when I hear this. I can’t tell if she’s talking about me or Bruce. I want to assume it’s me but the way they’re ogling each other makes me doubt myself. I keep looking at the ground.
They talk a bit more and I keep listening.
“They sound amazing”
“They’re also a huge dork.”
I haven’t actually given them many looks during their conversation in fear that they’ll see me. But I look over at this point and I tilt my head. Then she adds.
“Chicks dig that”
And I’m angry.
Is she really talking about him? Maybe she’s trying to be nice and still doesn’t know how to. Maybe she doesn’t realize she’s flirting hardcore.
I snap out of my thoughts and they are still talking
“Did he- were they- what did they do that was so… wrong to you?”
“Not a damn thing… but never say never”
I huff at her words and I watch as she walks over to me and sits down. She looks at me and I fix my face before she can tell I’m mad.
I’m gonna brush it aside and see if she tells me anything.
“What were you and Bruce talking about?”
I say with the most composed voice I can. She smiles and says
“I was talking about you. I don’t think he knows about us”
She smiles and I smile back and say
“Really? We’ve been dating for what? Six months now? And most everybody has found out.”
She shrugs her shoulders and says
“I think he was thinking of Cho when I was talking. I was like “chicks dig dorks” and he is a dork and I’m sure Cho likes him.”
I take a steady breath and nod my head. I grab Natasha’s drink and take a sip of it
“Hey! that’s mine!”
I give it back and say
“Sorry. I wanted to try it.”
It’s getting to the end of the party everyone is gone except the rest of the avengers and a stray drunk man that probably had some of Thor’s asgardian liquor.
The boys are trying to lift Thor’s hammer and Natasha has moved to my side. I look down at my dress and smooth out some of the wrinkles.
When suddenly this beat up robot comes out and starts talking all this crap. Everyone is on edge and suddenly he says he’s on a mission
“Peace in our time”
And then a bunch of Tony’s robots come flying out. Everyone scatters and I run behind the bar to grab the gun from it when Natasha jumps over and lands on her back
“Nat”
I try to go to her but then Bruce ends up on the bar.
Dumbass
Natasha pulls him off of the bar and he lands right on top of her.
His face is in her boobs and the impact makes Nat let out a loud choked groan. I narrow my eyes at him as he apologizes and she says
“Don’t turn green”
He says
“I won’t” and I grab one of the guns and she grabs the other.
She starts shooting and I wait and she looks at me and I nod my head towards the stairs and she tells Bruce to come with her.
I stay at the bar and wait for an opening to hit the robot.
I shoot it a couple times but this fucking gun doesn’t have as many rounds as Nat’s. So I wait a second and yell at cap to throw my his shield.
He throws it and I grab it doing a spin maneuver and throw it right at the robot slicing it clean in half.
This Ultron dude keeps yapping on and on about peace and whatever until Thor throws his hammer.
I don’t care right now. I am seething with how Bruce thinks he can do that to my girl.
Everyone tries to collect themselves making sure nobody is hurt but I march over to Bruce and Natasha and I start yelling
“You fucking cunt!”
Natasha gets in between us before I can hit him and she says
“Woah woah woah hold on babe what’s going on”
But I ignore her
“You think you can have her?! She’s mine you bitch!”
Everyone is worried about how I’m being kinda crazy so they circle around us and make sure I can’t get to Bruce. And he says
“Did you not just see what happened?! And you’re worried about me liking her?”
I huff and say
“I don’t give a fuck what just happened! You know what just happened?! You shoved your face in my girls tits! That’s what happened!”
He is actually scared of me and Tony is behind him saying
“Don’t turn green please”
For once he keeps his composure and says
“I didn’t mean to! She was pulling me down from getting shot!”
I get angrier and say
“So you’re gonna say it’s an accident? Don’t act like I didn’t hear your conversation earlier! I heard how you want her! If you ever touch her again I’ll cut your fucking balls off! You hear me?!”
Natasha ends up picking me up and carrying me to our room. She tells Tony
“I gotta get her away from him. When she’s calm we’ll come back to help. Just worry about ultron and Bruce.”
He nods his head as they all disperse. Natasha carries me to our room and then plops me down on the ground and says
“What the fuck y/n?! What the hell was that?!”
I look at the ground while my breathing is a bit erratic. I don’t say anything as I avoid eye contact with her.
She realizes I’m shutting down and to combat that she brings me over to the bed and makes me sit down. I look at my hands that are now in my lap and she sits down on my lap and wraps her arms around my neck.
As she plays with my hair she says
“Baby, can you please tell me what’s going on? Why are you so worked up over Bruce?”
I huff and say
“I heard what you said! You were totally talking about him and then he went and shoved his face in your boobs. That’s only my thing to do.”
She sighs and keeps asking knowing there’s more to it.
“Baby, what else?”
I stay silent for a bit and she squeezes my shoulder in reassurance and I crack. I immediately start crying and saying
“Please don’t leave me I love you. I don’t want you to leave me. Please don’t go! I love you!”
She pulls me in and rubs my back. Then she maneuvers us so that I am now straddling her lap.
Usually I act all tough when we’re around others but I am a baby around Natasha. She just brings the soft side out in me.
She rubs my back and shushes my crying and says
“Oh baby, I’m not leaving you. I love you too.”
My sons turn into more silent tears and she pulls me away from her neck. I whine a bit but she clicks her tongue and I quiet up. She makes me look into her eyes and says
“Listen to me okay?”
I nod my head and sniffle
“I am not leaving you for Bruce. I am not leaving you for anyone. I love you so so much and I don’t ever want to leave you okay?”
I nod my head and she continues
“Now that I’ve said that, I want to say that I was not talking about Bruce when I was talking to him. He had come up to me and said how he feels like he can’t talk to girls. He likes Cho, and he asked if he could practice being smooth or whatever with me. So I said yes not knowing you were being hurt by that. If I knew you’d be hurt I would have never done it.”
She pauses and I nod my head so she continues
“So yes I was flirting with him but it was fake and he was just trying to be cool for Cho okay?”
I look down and nod my head then she lifts my head back up by my chin and says
“I’m so sorry. I can see how that got mistranslated from across the room. Will you please forgive me?”
I nod my head and say
“I was never mad at you.”
She smiles and kisses my pout into a smile and when she pulls away I whine a bit in protest. I try to get another kiss but she says
“None of that detka. We have a big matter to handle then we can make out at much as you want okay?”
I nod my head and get up to go downstairs but she grabs my wrist and says
“Let’s get changed”
So she changes into a tank top and shorts and I change into a baggy shirt and shorts. Then Natasha says
“When we go downstairs, you’re gonna apologize to Bruce and then we’re gonna figure this ultron stuff out okay?”
I roll my eyes and nod my head but Natasha doesn’t like when I roll my eyes so she smacks my butt a bit and says
“Don’t roll your eyes at me”
I look down and say
“Sorry. I’ll apologize to Bruce”
She smiles and gives me a peck on the cheek.
We head downstairs and I go into the lab.
“Hey, um Bruce?”
He looks up and immediately is scared and he backs away, so u throw my hands up in surrender and say
“I’m not here to cause any trouble. I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I let jealousy overtake me and I got a little scared that Natasha and you liked each other. I didn’t know you like Cho. So I just wanted to apologize and say I’m not gonna cut your balls off”
He chuckles and says
“Uh it’s okay. Thanks for not murdering me”
He scratches the back of his head and I nod and go to leave but I pause and say
“You and Cho would go good together. I also think she likes you back so you should go for her after all this is over.”
He smiles and thanks me and I leave.
I walk into the hallway and Natasha is waiting for me there. I go to her and hug her but instead of a normal hug I shove my face in her boobs.
She laughs at my possessiveness and says
“You good there?”
I nod my head and say
“Mine”
But it is muffled since, of course, my face is literally in her boobs. And she chuckles and pats my head softly before rubbing it and says
“Yes. All yours.”
Once I am satisfied we go into our office and start working to figure out the ultron shit.
I look over at Natasha and say
“I’ll still cut his balls of if he touches you wrong again, or anyone’s for that matter”
She laughs and pats my head before saying
“I’m sure you will baby. I’m sure you will.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: I didn’t want to make Bruce the real bad guy. Oh no 😥 I’m going soft. A few years ago I would have never been nice about him. I hope you liked it!
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I can't stop thinking of Eddie as Cyrano de Bergerac.
He's in the drama club, he's known for his way with words, his ability to bring whole worlds to life with them. Few people know that he also writes poetry, poems about love and loss, society and justice, whatever comes to his mind. Many of them are about a mysterious person with gold-flecked eyes and autumn hair, constellations on his skin, and the sun in his heart.
Eddie guards his notebook full of poems like a dragon guards his hoard of gold. And yet.
And yet Susie Bowers finds it where it fell out of his pocket when that asshole Tommy Hagan pushed him against the lockers. She reads it and realizes how devastatingly beautiful Eddie's words are.
It makes her think… think about her crush on Steve Harrington, the fallen king who is still the most eligible bachelor at Hawkins High. Especially since he refuses to just take girls home to fuck them. No, he wants to date. He wants to fall in love. It's catnip for everyone, but at the same time so frustrating because no girl has managed to catch his eye yet.
Maybe this little notebook is her ticket to a relationship with Steve Harrington.
She approaches Eddie and shows him the notebook, pulling it out of his reach as he attempts to grab it. She offers him a deal: she won't spread copies of all his cute little writings all over the school, exposing his deepest secrets for everyone to see and ridicule. In exchange, Eddie will help her sweet-talk Steve Harrington.
Eddie agrees and writes love letters to the boy he's been in love with ever since he found him drunk and depressed on the side of the road after his girlfriend dumped him. He had taken him home, listened to him ramble on about what he had done wrong, why no one would want to love him, and then put Steve to bed and watched him sleep until morning to make sure he was okay.
He left before Steve woke up, and the next time they saw each other at school, Steve didn't even look at him. It had broken his heart and inspired most of his poems, because nothing inspires like heartbreak.
And now Eddie can tell Steve all the things he thinks and feels about him - just to make it seem like it's written by Susie.
It seems to work, because Steve replies to her letters. His replies are simpler, less lyrical, but just as earnest. His words are sweet, and he's funny and thoughtful.
He's everything Eddie knew he was going to be. And Susie couldn't care less, she just wants to go out with him, have him take her home, have everyone know that she's Steve Harrington's girlfriend.
They go out. After a dozen letters, he gives in and asks her out.
Eddie cries himself to sleep that night.
Someone knocks on his bedroom window. Confused and a bit nervous, because he doesn't have only friends in this town, far from it, he goes to open it.
And finds Steve Harrington standing right outside his window.
"What -"
"Did you mean them?" Steve asks and he can't tell from his tone what he's thinking.
"What?"
"Your letters, did you mean what you wrote or did you just write down what you thought I wanted to hear so I'd go out with Susie?"
His tone doesn't really change, but Eddie can see his eyes shining in the dim light coming from his bedroom. He looks upset, and Eddie wants to fix it, but he doesn't know what answer would do that.
So he chooses the truth. "Yes. I meant every single word I wrote in those letters."
"Then why didn't you send them under your own name?" When did Steve get so close? And why is the window sill digging into his stomach?
At Steve's question, Eddie can't help but laugh bitterly. "Did you look at me, Steve? I'm the town freak! A fuckup. Trailer trash. A small-time drug dealer who failed his senior year. Why would anybody - why would you want to get love letters from me?"
Steve nods, not saying a word as he turns and walks away. And okay, he deserves it, he guesses. Hanging his head in defeat, he shuffles away from the window and face plants on his bed, letting fresh tears fall from his eyes.
Until there's another knock, this time at his front door.
He's out of bed in record time, almost breaking his neck in his haste to get to the door. It can't be - it's impossible that this is -
Steve is standing on his front porch, looking devastatingly handsome in his light-washed Levi's and red sweater. His date outfit.
He walks up to him before Eddie can say anything and cups his cheek.
"I've been looking at you, Eddie. All I've done since the night you brought me home and listened to me and took care of me, I've been looking at you. Looking and waiting. Hoping. Wanting you to give me a sign, any sign, that it wasn't just chivalry that made you do this, but the fact that you cared. About me. But you never did."
"Steve," Eddie whispers, but Steve isn't finished.
"And then I get these letters, and all the words, they sound like you. I couldn't be sure, not until I read the line, 'You deserve someone who wants to love you, all of you, the good and the bad and everything in between. I want to be that person. I want to love you.' You're the only one I've ever said that to. I knew it had to be you."
"But why? Why go out with Susie?"
"Because I had to be absolutely sure that it wasn't Susie. And after ten minutes with her, I was. I drove around until I couldn't… I had to talk to you. To see if you mean it. If you want to love me."
Eddie kisses him.
There's nothing else on his mind but the need to finally kiss the boy he's been in love with for almost a year.
Steve kisses him back, soft, tender, then deeper, dirtier.
When they pull apart, both gasping, Eddie leans in closer because his next words are meant for him and Steve and no one else.
"I want to love you long after my body crumbles to dust and my soul finds yours in the afterlife. I want to love you as the ocean does the moon, forever bound, forever following its call, until the end of time."
#steddie#steddie au#steddie ficlet#eddie x steve#steve harrington x eddie munson#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things ficlet#my writing#don't ask me where this is coming from but it refused to go away until I wrote this down
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Uptown Girl
pairing: fashion designer!harry x younger!fashion designer!reader
summary: you’re working in a designer boutique, and just so happen to have a late entrance when world-renowned designer harry styles visits for a collaboration. he seems to take a liking to you, and you aren’t sure if that makes you relieved or more anxious
warnings: some cursing, not edited as usual
-
harry styles was a well-known name. ceo and founder of pleasing, a nail polish and perfume company. he also owned many other companies, but really, there were too many to keep track of. he was also, most importantly, one of the biggest fashion icons.
you were very familiar with him— had saved up every penny when you were younger to buy a pleasing perfume and now owned a very small collection of their nail polishes.
so, of course, you lost your shit when you found out he’d be coming into your job.
you were a fashion design major at nyu, and had gotten a job at a very esteemed designer (not one of the name brands, but still). although you did expect the job to have more opportunities to.. actually design fashion, you were still grateful nonetheless.
it was just your luck that the day that harry styles was coming in, you were late. it wasn’t your fault! really, it wasn’t! you were always on time because you got anxious at the mere thought of being late.
by the time you parked, you practically ran to the store, silently praying you wouldn’t break a leg as you were running in heels.
“i’m not late am i?” you ask breathlessly as you finally enter the store, fixing your hair and outfit.
you had curled your hair the night before, so they were still pretty much intact. your outfit consisted of black heels, brown dress pants, and a black, tight-fitting turtleneck.
“yes, y/n. you are late,” your boss gave you a look, and you knew you’d be in trouble. “mr. styles, i am so sorry. our employs are.. usually punctual.”
your head snaps over to look in the direction she was talking, and your heart drops when you make eye contact with harry styles.
great.
“mr. styles, i am so sorry,” you apologize.
“it’s perfectly alright,” he gives a kind smile.
that makes you feel a bit better.
“y/n, a word in my office please.”
you deflate as you look back to your boss and follow her to her office
the second the door is closed, she’s chewing you out.
“how unprofessional can you be? i know you are in college, but jesus christ!”
“i’m sorry! there was so much traffic, and my car is so old it stops working if i go faster than 50, and—“
“i don’t need excuses,” she cuts you off. “i need you to be more professional.”
you inhale, “i am sorry, but it was not my fault. i have never once been late before, and you know that. it was a one-time mistake.”
“it better be.”
she walks out and slams the door to the office, leaving you alone in there.
you look up to the ceiling as you bite your lip and try not to cry.
after taking a few minutes to collect yourself, you walk back out into the otherwise empty store and slap a smile on your face.
you do your usual tasks of tidying the store and fixing the mannequins.
mr. styles, his team, and your boss (her name was diane but she was more like satan) were all working on sketching designs and throwing some fabrics onto the mannequins to get a rough idea of what they wanted.
“i don’t know if i like it,” mr. styles murmurs, staring at the mannequin. you glace over at it and have to force yourself to not make a face.
no shit, he didn’t like it. it was bad.
the sketch was good, but the color combination was all wrong and the whole thing was too.. chunky. in the way that everything was flowy and baggy, so it had no shape.
“well, what do you not like about it?” diane asks.
“i’m not sure. it doesn’t look quite right.”
“you have to fix the shape,” you say to yourself as you fix the files of custom orders to be done.
“what was that?”
your head snaps up, and you realize he heard you.
“oh. uh.. i was just—“
“talking to herself,” diane interrupts, glaring at you. “she’s an intern. don’t mind her.”
“no, i’d like to hear what she has to say. might have the answer to our issue. let’s hear it— what was your name again?”
“y/n l/n,” you squeak out.
“well, y/n, what do you think is wrong?”
you hesitantly walk over, “well.. i can see the idea. but it’s just not.. executed well. the whole thing is too flowy.”
“isn’t the point for it to flow?” he asks, raising a brow.”
“it is,” you answer quickly, “but.. there has to be something that isn’t as.. baggy, i suppose. something has to be tight-fitting. it doesn’t have any shape. it just kinda.. looks like a box.”
he stares at you for a moment, and diane clears her throat.
“y/n, this is time for the professionals. get back to—“
“no, diane. she is.. she’s right. it does need shape.”
at his words, the people around him begin to pin it differently.
“and the colors,” you rush out. “the colors don’t.. it’s supposed to be a statement piece, right?”
“that’s the goal,” he nods.
“well.. the colors are too.. light. they’re more pastel, which is fine, but for it to really be a statement, it’s better to use brighter ones. or at least make one of them brighter. i would.. i think make the base the brighter one.”
diane looks ready to kill you.
mr. styles laughs, “well, don’t you know a lot? diane, where did you find her? wish my interns knew half as much as her.”
your face grows hot.
“she’s a student,” diane sighs.
“a student?” he asks.
“i… uh.. i study fashion at nyu. fashion design— i’m in my last year.”
he seems to sense that you're damn near about to shit your pants, because he grins at you (slightly patronizing, but also kind), before turning back to diane.
"i'd like her to be with me for the rest of the project. y/n, darling, how much are y'makin' here?"
your stutter, "uh--... $15 an hour."
he tuts his tongue like that's horrible, "i'll pay.. ten times that while y'workin' with me."
your eyes widen, "wh-- that's not-- you don't have to--"
"nonsense. it's what most people i work with start with. i'll up it if needed, of course. and you obviously don't have to, but i'd love your insight."
"i-- no, i-- i'd love to, i.."
"great," he grins, and you're extremely dizzy. what the hell was going on?
"uh.. mr. styles, if i may give my opinion," diane pipes up.
"you may," he eyes her skeptically.
"y/n is a student. she's still learning, and she's never worked on anything here. it's very risky to--"
he cuts her off by asking you a question, "have you designed things? sketched 'em out and all that?"
you nod.
"i'd hope you've also done the whole... actually sewing things together and really making them?"
you nod again.
he turns back to diane, "seems like she's got experience," he looks back to you, "do y'have photos of any of those?"
"yeah-- they're.. i think i left them in my car. i have photos on my phone."
"we'll meet later to look at all that, then. i'll give you my number later. for now.. i'd like your input on our other ideas."
-
for the rest of the day, you follow harry around, and you sort of feel like a lost puppy just following him around and answering when he asks something of you.
after a while, you got more comfortable giving your input without being prompted, but you always tiptoed around what you were really trying to get at in fear that you'd anger him.
at the end of day, he put your number in his phone with the promise that he'd text you later about more details.
-
the text came three days later.
From: (Maybe): Harry
Hello, Y/N. This is Harry. Would you be free to meet tomorrow at noon to discuss the details of the project? Please bring your sketches and any photos of designs you've done, and anything else you feel necessary.
To: Harry Styles
Hi! I should be free tomorrow, yeah. Where do you want to go?
From: Harry Styles
I'll let you decide.
To: Harry Styles
There is this one coffee shop named Maman?
Sent Location: 239 Centre St, New York, NY
From: Harry Styles
Alright. I'll see you tomorrow, Y/N. Have a nice rest of your day.
To: Harry Styles
You too!
-
you spend the rest of your night fretting about what to wear. you were stuck in between classy but not too fancy, but also not too casual. comfy, but not so comfy that you looked like you didn't give a shit. but also not so uncomfortable that you were, well, uncomfortable, and looked like you were trying too hard.
you'd eventually settled for something simple. long, light-wash denim skirt, a plain black top, and some mary janes. you tied some of your hair back with a white ribbon, did some natural makeup, and called it a day.
you got to the coffee shop at 11:45 and ordered your drink, as well as a chocolate croissant.
harry walked in at exactly 12:00, and grinned when he saw you sitting at a table, scrolling on your phone with a manilla folder and sketchbook beside you.
-
really, you can't blame him! you were pretty, he'd have to be blind to not know that. and really, you weren't that much younger than him.
he's 29, and you're 23. he's not a stalker, he just did a background check like any good business person would do.
so what he finds you cute? the relationship would be strictly professional. besides, you deserved a break from your horrible boss. contrary to what diane thought, the walls were not soundproof, and he could hear her chewing you out.
sure, he'd done that to one of his employees once or twice, but it was always deserved, and never on the first time of being late. that was ridiculous.
"good morning, y/n," he greets. your head snaps up to make eye contact and he has to force himself to not laugh. he wasn't laughing at you, per se. it was more so the fact that he found it amusing how jumpy you seemed around him.
"good morning. did you order?"
"not yet. never been here, so i've got no clue what's good."
you open your mouth to respond, but the barista calls out, "large iced honey lavender latte with a pain au chocolat for y/n!"
you give a sheepish smile and run up to retrieve your food and drink. when you come back, you take a sip of your drink and set what looks to be a chocolate croissant down on the table.
"well, i'm more of an iced coffee girl. and i also don't really like the taste of coffee, so i've got a bunch of sugar in mine. what do you usually drink?"
"'m more of a black coffee, to be honest. iced is fine, but hot's better."
you wrinkle your nose, "i don't know how you stand the taste of coffee. it's so bitter."
"better than what you've got!" he laughs, "might as well just down a sugar packet."
you giggle at his teasing, "only psychos drink plain black coffee. this," you hold up your drink, "is so much better."
"oh, is it now?"
"yes, it is," you cross your arms proudly.
"lemme have a taste."
you hand over the drink, and he takes a small sip before coughing, "christ, y/n! that cannot be good for your health!"
"hey, i'm still alive, aren't i?" you shrug.
“that you are.”
“well… just ask for an americano, i guess. the rest of their drinks are kinda sugary and fun.”
he got his drink, and once the both of you were sat down, he got to business.
“so, how long have you been designing?”
“i’ve been doing it since middle school. i.. uh.. i saw that one american girl doll movie. where she was a designer. and i just got obsessed. obviously they weren’t good, but…”
“so you’ve got a lot of experience then?”
you nod. he grins.
“may i see the sketches?”
you grab the folder off the top of the sketchbook and pass it over to him.
he flips through it in silence for a few minutes, and you anxiously nibble at the skin around your fingernails.
“..so?” you ask.
“they’re great. really, you’ve got talent. i can’t draw for shit, so you’ve got me beat,” he laughs.
you laugh with him, “most of those are just ideas, i’ve never made them. but i have photos of the ones i have made. i printed them so it’s easier.”
you pass over the manilla folder, and he opens it to look at all the photos you’d printed out. there was around fifty— those were just the ones you actually liked and were confident showing.
he holds one up, and your cheeks flush. “why’s this the only one where you’re the model?” he asks.
“that was.. uh.. that’s my senior prom dress.”
his eyes widen, giving you an impressed look, “you made your own prom dress?”
you nod, “i just wanted something very specific, so.. i figured i’d just make it myself.”
“y’look great— the dress looks great,” he coughs. “you’re very talented.”
“thank you,” you blush.
“so tell me why someone as talented as you is working in diane’s shop not designing a single thing?”
“i didn’t realize that was the job. i just got excited when my professor told me they were interested in my work, so i took the job. i thought i’d at least do a little designing, but.. it pays.. decent, though.”
he scoffs, “darling, 15 bucks an hour is not decent pay. that’s what you make being a hostess. you’re an artist. someone would pay thousands of dollars for just your sketches.”
“i don’t think i’m that good—“
“you are,” he’s firm. resolute. there is no room for argument with him. “i think you’ll be a great asset to the project. i could use your… talent. i’ll send you an email with the nitty gritty details. i’ll see you soon, y/n.”
and with that, he stands and leaves, leaving you to sit there, dumbfounded, confused, and grinning.
-
a/n: guys i have too many series going on 😭😭
#harry styles#harry styles x reader#harry styles oneshot#harry styles one shot#harry styles imagine#harry styles fic#harry#harry fic#harry styles au#harry styles fluff#designer!harry styles#designer!harry styles x reader#harry styles x designer!reader#harry styles x fem!reader
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Keep on pretending pretty girl.
based on pretty girls by Renee Rapp.
Regina George x Reader
You wouldn't say that you were popular but you were definitely well known, mainly for the fact that you were openly gay and stood up for yourself if anyone had something to say.
You knew how Regina George ran the school, but you never had to interact with her, fortunately for you. Though because of your clashing personalities everyone anticipated a fight between you too, knowing you wouldn't back down, even from the top plastic.
-
You held your lunch tray out in front of you as you were walking towards your table, as you were walking a jock slapped your food out of your hands.
"What's up, lesbo?" He says, you stand still, shocked at the situation. No one has ever tried to be violent with you, it was mainly just name calling.
You look up towards the guy, who you found to be Shane Omen "What the fuck dude?"
He chuckles, mockingly. "Aw, I'm sorry, were you going to eat that?"
You shake your head, deciding to just ignore him and leave. As you went to do that, he pushed you, causing you to stumble. You grab the table to save yourself.
"Where do you think you're going? I'm not done with you, dyke." You whip around, before he could even react to you facing him now, you swing your fist, hooking him right in the jaw. His head flew to the side, his hand immediately going up to try and soothe his mouth.
All the way across the gym, Regina George is watching the interaction, heat shooting straight through her body as she watches you sock her ex boyfriend in the face-
Wait did she think that was hot? No, she's not gay.
-
After the so called fight in the gym, your day was fine. You tried to ignore the shooting pain in your knuckles as you fixed your hair in the mirror. You see the door open and Regina walks through. She smirks at you.
She stands next to you, starting to adjust her her lipstick. "What's up, loser?"
You look over at her. "Uh, nothing much. what about you?" The sentence coming off more awkward than you wanted.
"I'm having a party this weekend, I want you there." Her tone makes your heart skip a beat.
"Just tell me when and where, I'll be there."
-
The weekend came sooner than you thought, leaving you rummaging through your closet. You finally find an outfit that is still your style but you're sure Regina would approve.
You walk through Regina's front door, the lights are dimmed and music is blaring. You weave through the people who were either drinking, dancing or eating each other's faces.
You find the drink table, grabbing a drink for yourself. You felt a hand on your arm, looking over to see Regina. "You came."
"Well you did invite me." You say, jokingly.
She snickers. "I wasn't sure you would show, this doesn't seem like your thing."
You shake your head. "It's not, but I figured I should try it before I have real life responsibilities."
"Well, I hope my party lives up to all of your expectations." As soon as she says that, she's wondering back into the crowd of people.
-
You find yourself sitting in a corner, the party really wasn't your thing. None of your friends were invited, so there was no one you could talk to, except for the occasional Regina.
She was sweeter than you thought she would be. Maybe it's because you haven't done anything wrong, but then again she snaps at people for just looking at her.
Speaking of her, she walks over to you, a sway in her walk. "Hey, loser."
"Hey, Regina" She slides into the spot next to you.
The smell of alcohol and expensive perfume invading your nose. You feel her turn to face you, you follow the action. "So, you're gay, aren't you?"
Ohh so this is the part where Regina finds something to tease you over and throws you out of the party? "Yeah, I like girls."
"That's cool." She says, the tension builds. "Is there any girl you have your eye on?" Her tone sounds almost like she wanting a specific answer.
"Not really, I don't talk to many people" She nods along with your statement.
She plays with her fingers. "You know... if I were gay, you would probably be my type." She inches close towards you.
You've heard that before, so many times. All of the straight girls who wanted to experiment. Why was this time different? Why did butterflies swarm your stomach? Why were you leaning in?
Before you knew it, your lips collide. A spark that makes your skin irrupt into a blush. Her hands get lost in your hair, trying to pull you closer. Your hand squeezes her thigh. You pull away, finally coming to your senses.
"What about Aaron?" Your hands remain in the same spot.
"Don't worry, he won't mind." You try to leave the situation, do the right thing and leave, but when she staring at you with her dilated pupils and kiss-swollen lips. you pull her in for another kiss, all coherent thoughts fly out of your mind, except for one that kept circling.
How can Regina be so mean if her lips are this sweet?
"Regina- oh my god" Gretchen screams.
You go to pull away but Regina holds you in place for another second, savoring the moment. "What Gretchen?" Regina was more annoyed than you thought. was she really that into the kiss?
"Aaron was looking for you, but I see that you're... busy" Gretchen looked you up and down.
Regina could tell Gretchen was judging you. "Yeah, I am actually. Tell him I left." Before Gretchen could even turn around, Regina pulls you in for a deep kiss. The action causing you to melt into her.
-
"Everyone is gone, Regina." You mutter against her lips, she slowly pulls away.
She sighs. "God, I can't get enough of you." Her sentence caused you to blush. "You know, we barely get to talk but you've always been my favorite. I think it's because you're not scared of me? I don't know but I've been watching you and I think you're cool." She plays with your hand, seeming nervous.
You smile at her. "I must be cool if I could do this." You pull her in for another kiss, she moans. You pull away, sooner than Regina wanted. she tries to follow you but eventually you break apart.
"I absolutely love what we got goin' on here but I think I should go home." She rolls her eyes, glancing over to the clock on her wall, it reads '3:00 AM'. She realizes how long you two have been there.
"Oh shit, you're right" Regina gets up, adjusting her outfit. “This was fun, baby” She pecks your lips one last time before leaving the room.
-
As you walk into the school, you’re nervous to see Regina. You’re not sure why, she said she had fun last night.
You see her passing by. "Hey Regina!" She ignores you, pushing right pass you.
What the fuck?
You brush it off, deciding to continue on with your day. You walk into your first period, the only open seat was next to Regina. You walk over there, she turns away from you as much as she can. Visibly avoiding you.
Half way through the period, you try and talk to her. "Regina, if you're mad-"
She cuts you off immediately. "Why are you talking to me? We never talked before. What changed?"
You scoff. "You know exactly what changed, but if we're going to play that game, let's do it."
Regina looks at you, slightly shocked.
-
The next time you see regina that day is in fifth period, right before lunch. She's sitting in the seat you always sit at.
"You're in my seat." You stare down at her.
She smirks. "It doesn't have your name on it."
"It actually does, I carved it in to the desk when I was bored. So get out." She looks down, seeing your name faintly carved into the plastic.
You tap your foot, getting impatient. "That doesn't make it yours. I've decided I want to sit here today."
You shake your head. "I preferred it when you didn't talk to me." You turn around, storming off to a different desk.
-
The period finally ended, after what felt like forever. You packed your notebook in your backpack, quickly leaving the class, as you were walking down the hall, a hand pulled you into the janitors closet.
"What the hell-" You were interrupted by lips crashing into yours. You quickly pull away, relieved to see Regina, but also extremely confused. "Regina-" She cut you off again. Kissing you passionately, not letting you think about anything else except for her. You kiss her back, her taste too intoxicating to not. When air became a problem, she pulled away.
"God, I hate you" She whispers against your lips.
Your brows crinkle in confusion. "Why?"
She kisses you lightly. "I think you've brought out the part of me I've been trying to keep away all these years."
"Maybe instead of hating me, you should be thanking me." She smirks.
"I think I'm showing you enough gratitude." Your lips meet again, passion overflowing.
#fanfic#regina george x reader#regina george#mean girls#renee rapp#renee rapp x reader#regina george x you#mean girls the musical#mean girls 2024#regina george is a lesbian#wlw fiction#regina george icons
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A kind of sex education ( platonic cas x winchesters x reader)
summary : when castiel curious nature after watching adult movies leads to a strange string of questions and learning of their sex lives .
warnings well there is really none just awkward sex talk . this is more a drabble
What was supposed to be a normal ass day of research ended up more strange then any hunt well it definitely up there . She wanted to prove dean wrong but walked in on castiel doing his own research . eyes locked on the screen , while head tilted in confusion and a woman's moans filled the room making the two freeze to their spot.
" is he watching..." her voice trailed off .
" porn yeah , we've got an angel watching porn " dean shook his head .
" erm cas buddy that stuff is not for the communional area's more privacy of your own room " she winced as the sound of skin slapping got louder.
" if the pizza man truly loves the babysitter why does he keep slapping her rear ?" he turned to the red faced hunters standing before him . " perhap she has done something wrong" he added.
" cas turn it off please" she asked quicker and louder ,making cas stand and her to gasp . " oh my ,dean does he have " she turned to the man .
" A boner yep " he snorted .
" Cas why are you watching this " she asked sitting across from him noticing his eyes trail to her chest.
" You can't watch porn in a room filled with dude's and Y/N " the older winchester chuckled wondering would sam believe him .
" I was bored and bobby told me to borrow a video out of his room" he looked even more confused what was wrong .
" Well good to know i can never look bobby in the eyes again " she felt her cheeks heating up giving the situation.
" Is sex like this in real life " he asked making her wishing she went on the supply run .
" no never , i mean the girls finish for one and those moanS so fake " she snorted making dean shoot her alook .
" A Man never made you finish " he asked curiously.
" Cas you can't ask a chick that ... but yeah what "he said turning to Y/N for some help .
" No they have not anyway's cas sex is nothing like these movies their just fantasized version that people mainly watch to well get off " she explained awkwardly again wanting to leave the room as soon as she could.
" Alone so don't whip it out " dean added seeing the angel looking down at his crotch .
" Do you watch it " cas asked looking straight at her.
" i mean yeah i do sometimes " she smiled weakly seeing deans face light up .
" That's hot sweet girl " he winked .
" that made it move " Cas looked down at his crotch .
" Oh kill me now " she cried as dean doubled over laughing .
" Do you like your rear slapped " Cas asked still filled with questions.
" ok ok why is this aimed at me " she stood.
" I mean trench coat baby has valid questions so sweetheart does spanking get you going " dean teased finding the whole thing amazing .
" wouldn't you like to know " she winked before leaving the room before the angel curiosity killed her .
" Hey i wanted to know " dean yelled just as sam walked in almost dropping the bag of groceries when he had seen what was on the screen .
" Why are you and cas watching porn " he arched his brows .
" Cause he found it in bobbies room and was curious and just to clarify he was watching it not me " dean snorted.
" Does Y/N like her rear smacked she wasn't clear on her answer " castiel asked standing and to full attention still .
" Ithink i'm going to go back to the store , maybe never come back " sam walked back out the door.
"damn it cas go fix that or have a cold shower" dean huffed leaving the angel standing confused to what was going on and why everyone was so uncomfortable .
...........
To say dinner time in the bunker was filled with tension was an understatement . all eyes on their plates to bobby's confusion , hell Y/N hasn't looked at him once .
" Ok what the hell happened here did you walk in on those too having sex or something " he gestured to dean and Y/N .
" No Y/N has never finished in sex " cas said easily .
" someone seriously just shoot me " she groaned.
" i'd let you finish princess " dean winked.
" Erm cas may have gotten his hands on a special movie from your room and it lead to some interesting question mainly aimed at our female hunter " sam explain.
" Pizza boy and babysitter really man " dean asked as bobby's eyes found his plate really interesting all of a sudden.
" I'm going to eat in my room and never talk to you guys again except sam " she ran out the room with her plate.
" Hey want me to join you for dessert" dean called .
" Fuck off " she yelled back .
" Thank god we don't have a HR department " sam muttered.
" She never gonna talk to any of us again " bobby face was beet red knowing his niece now knew what he had in his room .
" Who even has porn dvds anymore " .
" I fixed my boner earlier alone like you said " cas said as the other dropped their forks .
" I'm joining Y/N , you guys deal with this " sam ran down the hall .
" is he going to smack her rear ? ".
" Ok no more porn questions ever watch it in your room in private and never tell us again and stop asking y/n sex questions before she leaves us altogether" dean deadpanned.
" We're definitely going to hell for getting an angel hooked on porn " bobby mumbled.
part two
#dean winchester x reader#sam winchester x reader#castiel x reader#cas#dean winchester#sam winchester#bobby singer#supernatural#supernatural fic#supernatural drabble#cw supernatural#supernatural cas#funny#supernatural crack
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Jess Mariano SMUT: The best friend and the boyfriend.
POV: Your best friend Rory always gets what she wants as the town’s golden girl. Well, you have had enough and its time you get what you want.
WARNINGS: 18+ (minors dni); cheating; rory slander; lorelai slander; p in v intercourse; dirty talk; unprotected sex; light choking - i think that is it
AUTHOR’S NOTE: wasn’t enough jess smut for me on here. Wanna fix that! first time writing anything so please be gentle. 2k+ words
You’re at Luke’s diner trying to get some work done before your exam tomorrow. The wetness inbetween your legs was proving a great distraction to the task at hand. You had to muster every ounce of concentration to listen to what Lane and Rory were saying. The three of you were finishing up your group project for school. You had all been friends for years, but recently you had found it hard to be yourself around them.
The reason for that, was standing behind the counter, serving customers with a surly look and a quippy comment if he spoke at all. Jess.
The whole town knew about him and Rory. How could they not? Stars’ Hollows’ golden girl drew attention wherever she went. Her and Dean’s romance had been the talk of the town - the stuff of young love! And she could do no wrong. Even after she dragged Dean through hell and back with her indecisiveness before ultimately bringing him to breaking point - people still loved her.
And hey - you did too. She was your best friend. But you couldn't help but roll your eyes at the way the town fawned over her. Even though it had been happening your whole lives. Rory and her busybody, try-hard mother were the apple of the town’s eyes. And you were used to it.
But you had been surprised that Jess had fallen for it. When he arrived in town, a sullen and brooding figure, you had immediately felt drawn to him. You could sense his angst. You could feel it vibrating off of him. And lets not pretend like he wasn’t a total smokeshow. He looked like a man.
If only Lorelai and Luke weren’t so close. Then you might have gotten your chance. But as fate had it, and as it always seemed to, Rory got in there first. Lorelai invited Luke and Jess over for a welcome dinner, and he instantly became smitten with Rory’s mild manner. It only took a matter of months - and a breaking of one Dean Forrestor’s heart - until they became an item.
At first it was all rosy. Rory wouldn’t shut up about it. But you could tell. Something wasn’t quite right. Two months passed and Rory would go red every time Jess was brought up, or came to sit with your group at lunch. You asked Rory - genuinely as a friend. She would just mumble and divert the subject. Lane also pressed, but there was no budging Miss Gilmore.
It was only a month ago when you cottoned on to what the problem was. You had been wearing jeans that hugged your ass, and a top that teased just enough of your cleavage to make anyone blush. You bumped into Jess in the hallway at school. As in, physically bumped into him, as he came around the corner. He grabbed onto you out of instinct to apologise.
“Oh hi Y/N. What are you….” His eyes trailed down to your chest. You didn’t notice at first. You thought he was dazed by the surprise interaction.
“Just on my way to Spanish. Señora Castilla is making us do a book report - I’m doing 100 years of Solitude.”
“Hmm” he responded. “That’s one of my favourites. Magical realism, love, scandal - “
And then you clock. His eyes are on your tits. His hand is still on you. On the small of your back.
This man is hungry. He hasn’t been laid or anything of the sort in a while. Or at least since he has been with Rory. Jess wants you. You avert your gaze.
“Jess. I have to go.”
He moved his hand lower, testing the waters. You don’t remove it. You inhaled, trying to retain your morals. You remind yourself: We’re in the middle of the hallway. At school. He is Rory’s boyfriend. Rory is my best friend.
You repeated these over and over to yourself like a mantra, willing yourself to move. After what seems like an eternity, he whispers in your ear: “My car. 10 minutes,” and sauntered away.
And that was how it began. A whole month of some of the steamiest makeout sessions, hottest sex, and best orgasms of your life. Did the secrecy turn you on? Maybe. Did you feel bad for Rory? Perhaps. But were those moments with Jess worth it? Absolutely.
You had to be careful. Not just to avoid Rory and Lane. But Luke couldn’t know either. If he did, he would have gone straight to Lorelai and it would have been a whole thing. It wasn’t worth it. So the two of you would sneak in quickies in his car, behind Miss Patty’s studio, in the AV room at school etc.
But Luke was out tonight. Doing something for Lorelai probably. Who knows. Jess had suggested the two of you take advantage of the situation. He had recently acquired his own room at Luke’s, ever since his uncle had knocked a hole in the wall for him. It wasn’t much, but you couldn’t wait to share a bed with him, and take your sweet time worshipping his body.
“Okay Y/N, we’re off. You coming?” Asked Lane.
“Nah, I have a bunch more work to do for my college application. I will see you both tomorrow?”
Rory went over to give Jess a kiss goodbye. You couldn’t help but smirk as you saw him looking at you as she kissed his cheek. The two girls waved goodbye and left the cafe.
The minute they left, Jess pounced on your table. He summoned Cesar to take over his shift and close up.
“Cmon baby” he whispered, taking care not make it look obvious to the other customers what was going on.
You and Jess went up the stairs silently but quickly. The minute you reached the top flight and opened the door into the living quarters, Jess slammed the door shut and pressed you against it.
“Do you know how bad you are? Sitting right next to my girlfriend and giving me those ‘fuck me’ eyes all night? It was all i could do not to take you on the table right there.”
His forehead was against yours, his hands cradling your face. All you could see was him. All you could feel was him.
“Such a good boy for restraining yourself,” you cooed, trying lure him into making the first move. Each time you were together, it still felt like new. A game of chicken. Who would break first? Fresh and dangerous, yet familiar and comforting all at once. “It must have been so hard for you” you said, moving your hand towards his crotch. “Show me how much you want me” you dared.
It was too much for him. He growled and leant in to kiss you with everything he had. He was messy and sloppy with need. His teeth clashed against yours. You moaned with need. Your hands wandered to your waist, dipping under your trousers, then your panties. You started playing with your clit and panting his name back into his mouth.
You were still against the door. Jess moved his hands under your shirt, finding the valley of your chest easily as you hadn’t worn a bra today.
“Fuck” he said, breaking the kiss. “You had your tits out all day baby girl? You are such a slut, wanting everyone to notice.”
Before you could begin to formulate a reply, his mouth was on your left nipple. You sighed as he sucking with such fervour. Just as you got used to the sensation enough to say something witty to him, he bit down hard. You yelped - this was a new move from him. He obviously felt emboldened by the new setting, being in his own territory and out of a car.
Jess went to your right nipple, sucking and making the most obscene slurping noise and his hand went to your other tit. It was too much. It felt too good. You started playing with your clit with even more until he finally noticed.
“That’s my job Y/N. Its not like you to be so selfish!“ he scolded. He grabbed both your wrists and pressed himself into you, letting you feel his bulge. You whimpered at the loss of your fingers inside your wet cunt and pouted at him. He brought your fingers to your mouth.
“Suck” he said, with a devious glint in his eyes. Like a fucking wet wipe, you did as he said. You were embarrassed at first, but didn’t care. You would do anything he said at this point.
When he was satisfied you had fully cleaned your fingers, he took them out your mouth and kissed you hard and hungrily on the lips.
You saw you opportunity to the turn the tables, to take power. “Jess?” You asked innocently.
“Hmm?” He responded, trailing kisses down your neck.
“The whole point of tonight is that we have a bed for once. Let’s make the most of it.” You pushed him off you and took his hand. You walked past the door to his bedroom. He stopped you and looked at you confused.
“Oh Jess. I don’t wanna be fucked in your single bed. I want to feel all of you” you whispered in his ear, guiding him to Luke’s room and king-sized bed.
His eyes widened with realisation and need. Was this a bad idea? Almost certainly. Did he care? At this point, not even wild horses could stop him from having you. He would do anything you said. And he had to admit, there was something hot about doing it somewhere he shouldn’t.
You pushed Jess onto Luke’s bed, unzipped his jeans and pulled down his boxers. His cock sprung up immediately. It was red, throbbing and angry. You couldn’t help but drool. Jess saw this and smirked. He knew what he did to you. He pulled off his shirt, knowing it would drive you crazy.
You dived onto his cock, unable to wait any longer. You took all of him in his mouth, as he held your head there. His pubic hair tickled your nose. You stayed there for as long as possible, until your eyes watered. You took your head off, wiped your mouth, and then began bobbing up and down slowly.
Jess propped himself up on his elbows, watching you like a hawk. His tongue was sticking out as he concentrated his breathing to stop himself from blowing his load. His dark curls were pressed wet against his forehead as beads of sweat started to roll down his face.
You moved to his balls, gently sucking them into your mouth while your hand moved up and down on his rock hard member. He started moaning and rocked his hips into your hands, desperate for more.
You had him right where you wanted him. You removed yourself from him completely and clambered to sit on top of him. His cock was nestled in your folds. So close to where he wanted to be. So close to where you wanted him to be. But you decided the chase was more fun. You lowered yourself down, so that your tits were pressed against his chest.
You whispered “Can Rory make you feel this way, Jess? Does she drive you wild like I do? Can she make you moan like a bitch the way I can? Has she ever made your cock this hard?” You punctuated each sentence with a nip on his ear.
“Fuck you,” he replied, grabbing your ass and turning you onto your back so that he was on top. He pushed himself into you and started fucking you with no mercy.
Your tits were bouncing with every thrust and you were whimpering with need every time he pulled out. You snaked your arms around his back, pulling him deeper into you. You didn’t want any space between you.
“You’re such a whore Y/N. Fucking your best friend’s boyfriend. I can’t believe it turns you on so much.”
You moaned at this words, unable to deny the appeal of the whole situation.
“Fuck baby, I can feel your cunt clenching around me as i say that! You are a fucking whore Y/N, squeezing me with your greedy pussy. Such a bad fucking girl.” Jess yelps, spanking your ass.
“I am a whore Jessy, your whore, only for you” you cried, embarrassed by your pathetic display. He grinned as you used the nickname you only brought out for him when you were cock drunk beyond belief. You groaned inwardly as you couldn’t believe you had given him the satisfaction of that ego boost.
You were lost completely in Jess. He moved his hand down to your core, adding a finger into your weeping pussy, and using his thumb to toy with your clit. It was bliss.
“Jessy?” You called out.
“Hmm?” He groaned in response.
“I want you to cum inside me” you begged.
His eyes widened as a wild look came over him. Without missing a beat, he swung your legs over his shoulders and bent you in two as he fucked into you harder than before. His hand moved to your throat, gently choking you. You stuck your tongue out like a dog in heat - animalistic and beyond a care as to what was normal.
The bed’s headboard was hitting the wall with every thrust from Jess’ pelvis, sure to cause a suspect dent tomorrow. But neither of you could have given a single fuck as the you both chased your highs. The sound of skin slapping, moans and gasps were obscene.
“Jess, have you seen Luke’s toolbox? We need it and he said it might be - Oh my god!”
You both froze and turned to the door. Lorelai was face to face with you and Jess butt naked on Luke’s bed. Sorry - lets rephrase that. Lorelai walked in on her daughter’s boyfriend and best friend fucking raw on Luke’s bed.
She narrowed her eyes and hissed: “Get the fuck out.”
#jess mariano#gilmore girls#milo ventimiglia#gilmore girls smut#jess mariano smut#literati#lorelai gilmore#jess x reader#jess mariano x reader#jess mariano x y/n#jess mariano imagine#jess imagine#gilmore girls imagine
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PLAYING FOR KEEPS
CHAPTER 7 - Celebrations
Summary: Ona Batlle has had a crush on Lucy Bronze for a little while now… how will it go when she joins Barça? A 10 chapter series.
Warnings: Slow burn, angst, fluff, smut. All the things, but I give this as a complete warning for the whole series. Not every chapter involves all the warnings :).
masterlist
November 26, 2023: vs. Athletic Bilbao (4-0, away) December 9, 2023: vs. SD Eibar (5-0, home) December 13, 2023: vs. FC Rosengård (6-0, away) December 17, 2023: vs. UDG Tenerife Sur (2-0, away) December 21, 2023: vs. FC Rosengård (7-0, home)
22 December 2023 – Spain
The last few weeks had been nothing short of bliss.
Since the team trip to Germany, Ona and Lucy hadn't spent another night apart. It felt almost surreal how they’d slipped into this unspoken routine of staying over at each other's places.
Whether it was Ona with her little dog Coco at Lucy’s apartment, or Lucy crashing at Ona’s with Narla, they always found an excuse to be together.
There were no labels, no discussions. Just being. It felt natural, like the most normal thing in the world.
But it felt also like something heavy and unspoken hanging in the air.
Like on this chilly December morning, they had woken up at Lucy's place. Ona cherished mornings like these, the quiet moments, waking up wrapped in Lucy's arms.
The days she loved most were the ones when they didn’t have to rush off early. On those mornings, the dogs would join them in bed as one of them made breakfast. It felt like a slice of heaven, a perfect world of just the two of them, their dogs, and the cozy quiet of the apartment.
This morning, though, they did have to wake up on time. After waking up and some brief cuddles, they had walked the dogs before heading to the club for breakfast, followed by some light recovery training after their game against FC Rosengård the day before.
By early afternoon, they were done, so everyone of the team could get ready for the special night ahead. In the car back, Ona had insisted on an afternoon to herself. She wanted to get dressed on her own as she had no idea yet what she would be wearing tonight.
..
Now, standing in front of her mirror, fixing her hair, Ona’s thoughts where occupied with the plans for the evening.
Tonight was going to be an early Christmas dinner with the team, Barça staff and everyone’s partners, followed by a night out with just the girls of the team and their partners, without the Barça-B players or staff members.
The club they were heading to later didn’t allow phones, offering a sense of privacy they rarely had. But despite the freedom, tension knotted in Ona’s stomach. She could be close to Lucy tonight, but not in a way she, or maybe they both, wanted. As much as she longed to let go, to dance with Lucy in the way her heart ached to, she couldn’t. Not in front of everyone.
The thought frustrated her more than she wanted to admit. Her and Lucy weren’t in a relationship, even though it felt like it with their routines, they were secret. They just had an arrangement.
With a sigh, Ona turned her attention back to the scattered clothes across her bed. It was a chaotic mess of indecision.
Dresses, trousers, jackets… none of it felt right. She wanted to feel confident, yet safe. The sleek black dress she’d initially picked felt wrong. It didn’t quite had the vibe she was going for. She didn’t feel like something low cut or something that sat nice around her figure. No, she didn’t want to be perceived. Well, she wanted Lucy to, but it felt wrong. Tossing it aside, she settled on something else. A suit. It was sharp, it was elegant and it most of all it looked nice on her.
She slipped on the fitted black suit, smoothing out the jacket. A small smile tugged at her lips. This was the best it was going to get. The crisp white blouse underneath completed the look, giving her the confidence she needed to face the night. It wasn’t flashy, it wasn’t daring, but it was good for now.
With one last glance in the mirror, Ona chuckled softly to herself. She didn’t really feel ready to "attack the night" at all. But there was one thing she was looking forward to, and that was cuddling up with Lucy at the end of it. And maybe something more. They’d see how tired they were after the night played out.
…
In the dimly lit car garage, the soft click of Ona’s slightly heeled shoes echoed against the concrete as she made her way to her car. She had offered to drive tonight, opting not to drink, and reassuring Lucy earlier that it was completely fine if she wanted to have a drink or two. Ona had no intention of drinking anyway.
When she arrived, Lucy was already leaning against the car, looking effortlessly stunning in a tailored black suit. Unlike Ona’s outfit, Lucy had paired hers with a sleek black vest instead of a white blouse. The sight of her took Ona’s breath away for a second, her heart skipping a beat at how natural Lucy made looking this good seem.
“You ready?” Lucy asked, her voice soft, a smile playing on her lips as the dim garage lights caught a glint in her eyes.
Ona nodded, fumbling for a second as she clicked the car open. “Yeah, let’s go.”
As they settled into the car, a silence fell over them. Ona’s hands gripped the steering wheel, occasionally glancing at Lucy from the corner of her eye. The tension was palpable but not uncomfortable, just unspoken, like there was something hanging between them that neither wanted to address first.
After a few minutes of quiet, Lucy broke the silence, her voice hesitant. “Did you, uh… did you have a good afternoon?”
Ona glanced at her, slightly surprised by the question. “Yeah… why?”
Lucy shifted awkwardly, shaking her head. “Oh, nothing, I-I’m just… it’s stupid.” She waved it off.
The silence that followed felt heavier now. Ona wanted to ask more, but the uncertainty in Lucy’s voice held her back. She reached out instead, placing her hand gently on Lucy’s knee. “You look really good tonight, by the way” she said softly, hoping to ease whatever tension Lucy was feeling.
The warmth of Lucy’s leg beneath her palm was brief. Ona immediately pulled her hand back as she felt Lucy tense slightly at her touch, worried she had overstepped. “Sorry-”
Lucy quickly caught her hand and placed it back on her knee. “No, no. It’s fine,” she murmured, her tone softer this time. “It’s nothing.”
Ona frowned, glancing over at Lucy as the car sped down the empty streets. “Is it because I said I wanted the afternoon alone?” she asked cautiously.
Lucy didn’t respond immediately, her gaze fixed out the window. They were getting close to the restaurant now, the dim lights of the street casting soft shadows across Lucy’s face.
“Is it?” Ona asked again, more confused. “I just wanted to dress up and do my hair by myself... that’s all.”
Still no response. The silence stretched out for what felt like minutes until Ona added quietly, almost shyly, “I missed you.”
Lucy’s head snapped toward her, eyes wide with surprise. “You… missed me?”
Ona’s face flushed with embarrassment. They had been spending so much time together, it felt safe to admit something like that now. She hesitated but nodded. “Yeah, of course. Why wouldn’t I?”
Lucy’s expression softened, but her voice dropped to a murmur. “I thought you finally realized you wanted your own space again.”
Ona didn’t catch the full sentence, too focused on parking the car in front of the restaurant. Her gears where still grinding about Lucy’s confused expression a few seconds ago.
As she finished reversing into the spot, she realized what she had forgotten to do. A kiss. She hadn’t kissed Lucy when they met at the car, too distracted by how incredible she looked.
“I forgot something,” Ona whispered, leaning closer to Lucy until their foreheads touched. Her voice dropped to a playful whisper. “Can I kiss you?”
Lucy chuckled softly, her breath warm against Ona’s lips. “Of course, if you want to.”
Ona frowned playfully, leaning back just a bit. “Want to? Of course, I want to.”
But Lucy’s gaze shifted slightly, something uncertain in her eyes. “I just thought… maybe you wanted things to be more casual again.”
Ona’s heart thudded in her chest. “More casual? Do you want that?”
Lucy hesitated, her words stumbling out. “I mean, we’ve gotten pretty close… and I get it if you want things to be simpler again.” Her voice was quiet, uncertain, as though she was trying to feel out how Ona truly felt.
Ona’s thoughts raced. Maybe Lucy was feeling unsure about this all. “I mean… I could do casual,” she said cautiously. “But, you know… for me, the sleeping over, the kissing… it’s nice.”
She cringed inwardly at how clumsy her words sounded. Nice? It was much more than that. She was trying to find the right balance between what she felt and what she thought Lucy might want.
Lucy smiled softly, her tension easing just a little. “Yeah. It is nice.” Then her eyes swept over Ona, and she blushed slightly. “By the way, you look perfect tonight too. I wanted to tell you earlier, but… I was a bit in my head.”
Ona smiled, her heart swelling at the compliment. “Thank you.”
There was a beat of silence before Ona leaned in again, her voice dropping to a whisper. “Well… what do you say to a kiss before we go inside and have to spend the whole night without?”
Lucy nodded, her eyes soft and warm as she leaned in closer. “Yeah.”
Their lips met in a brief but hurried kiss, not their best, but enough to send a small thrill through Ona’s body. She pulled back with a smile, leaning in to kiss Lucy’s jaw, lingering there for a moment before murmuring, “Maybe more later tonight?”
Lucy tensed beneath her touch again, and for a moment, Ona thought she’d pushed too far. But before she could say anything, Lucy’s lips crashed against hers, more insistent this time, a teasing kiss that held the promise of more to come. It sent a shiver down Ona’s spine, leaving her breathless by the time they pulled away.
“Okay,” Ona whispered, her heart racing, “let’s go before I forget why we’re here.”
..
The restaurant was bathed in a soft, golden light, casting a warm and intimate glow over everything. In the corner stood a towering Christmas tree, its decorations shimmering under the gentle twinkle of lights, adding to the festive atmosphere. The mouth-watering smell of roasted meat, rich spices, and freshly baked bread filled the air, mingling with the sound of laughter and conversation from diners already seated.
As they stepped into the wardrobe, Lucy and Ona were greeted by Paños and her girlfriend. Hugs were exchanged, but Ona couldn’t help but notice a slight strangeness in the way Sandra looked at them. It was subtle, just a flicker of something that made Ona feel a little uneasy, but she shook it off.
The four of them arrived together at the tables, greeted by the cheerful voices of their teammates, who were already scattered around the room.
“Look who finally decided to show up!” Mapi called out with a playful grin, her eyes twinkling as she saw them approach. “We thought you guys were skipping out on us!”
Ona winced inwardly. They were late, and it was probably her fault. She hadn’t even checked the time earlier, lost in the moment, but when she’d walked to the car, Lucy had already been waiting. And during the drive, well, neither of them had exactly rushed.
“We’re not that late,” Ona shot back..
Lucy chuckled, clearly unfazed. “Just fashionably late,” she said with a chuckle, sliding into the empty seat beside Mariona.
Ona found her spot next to Aitana, directly across from Lucy. Their eyes met briefly across the table, a spark of something unspoken passing between them before Ona quickly looked away, focusing on the name card standing neatly on the plate in front of her. There was something charged in the air between them, a pull that only she and Lucy felt. Or was it just her? Ona didn’t know anymore. Lucy had been acting strange, distant, like she didn’t want to be as close anymore. It was confusing. Hadn't Lucy seemed into it just as much as she was? Ona's mind swirled with doubt.
The team, however, was in high spirits. The successful season so far had put everyone in a celebratory mood, and the promise of more than a week of vacation ahead added to the excitement. Laughter and conversation filled the room, and Ona tried her best to focus on Aitana’s enthusiastic chatter, but her mind kept drifting.
After the appetizers were served, Patri stood up, glass in hand, clearly having drawn the shortest straw and the one who had to give the toast. She rolled her eyes playfully before launching into a short but nice speech about family, health, and success.
“To a great rest of the season,” Patri said ending her toast, raising her glass high. “and happy holidays.”
The team cheered, clinking glasses as Patri finished her speech. Ona clinked her glass against Aitana’s.
Throughout the dinner, the conversations flowed effortlessly. Stories from training, memorable moments from matches, and inside jokes bounced from one end of the table to the other. Ona laughed with her teammates, but her gaze kept drifting, inevitably, back to Lucy. She couldn’t help it. Lucy had a presence that was hard to ignore, even in a room full of people.
Every time Ona tried to focus on the conversations, she found herself sneaking glances across the table. Lucy’s easy laughter, the way she threw her head back at someone’s joke, or how her face lit up when she made a joke of her own. Ona’s heart ached with an unspoken longing she was desperately trying to hide.
And then there were the moments when their gazes would meet. They were fleeting but intense. Lucy’s lips would curl into a small smile, subtle yet powerful, and it sent a rush of warmth through Ona’s chest. She tried to smile back, but each time she did, she felt her pulse quicken and her cheeks heath up.
No matter how hard she tried to shake it off, there was no escaping the pull. Lucy had a way of drawing her in, effortlessly charming everyone around her, while Ona sat across the table, feeling both lucky to be there and yet, on the verge of something breaking inside her.
Because as much as she longed to cross the invisible line between them, she knew she couldn’t. Not now. Maybe not ever. It wasn’t possible to tell her how she felt, Lucy would think she was dumb.
..
A couple of hours had passed.
The club was only a short walk from the restaurant, so the group had decided to walk over together. Now, Ona clung to her little circle of friends, hoping that keeping busy would distract her from the one person she couldn’t stop thinking about.
The club was loud and vibrant, pulsing with energy. The bass of the music thumped in Ona's chest as she and the team stepped into the dimly lit space. Neon lights flickered across the room, casting vivid colors over the dance floor, where bodies swayed, already lost to the beat. The no-phone policy added an air of intimacy, as if the world outside had disappeared, leaving just them in this chaotic, throbbing bubble.
At the bar, Ona ordered a soda, she sipped it absentmindedly. Across the room, Lucy stood, dancing with a few teammates. But it wasn’t just them. A couple of unknown girls hovered close, laughing, leaning in to talk to Lucy. Ona’s gaze lingered longer than it should have, her heart tightening at the sight of Lucy; so relaxed, swaying effortlessly to the rhythm of the music, her laugh ringing out above the noise. Or maybe Ona could just hear her laugh in her thoughts.
She’d seen Lucy dance before - after victories, celebrations in the locker room - but this was different. Lucy moved with a kind of ease and charm that made Ona’s breath catch. The jacket Lucy had been wearing was discarded somewhere, and now, in the dim lighting, the curve of her biceps gleamed under flashes of purple and blue neon.
Get it together. Ona forced herself to turn away, focusing on Salma, who was animatedly telling a story about a something something Vicky. She nodded, tried to laugh at the right moments, but her attention kept slipping back to Lucy. Every time Lucy laughed, it was like a magnet, drawing her eyes back across the room.
And then she saw it.
A girl Ona didn’t recognize danced her way toward Lucy, smiling as she touched her arm and leaned in to say something, her lips close to Lucy’s ear. Lucy’s laugh in response was casual, unbothered, but the sight of it made Ona’s stomach twist painfully. Then another girl joined, moving closer, her body swaying in sync with Lucy’s.
Ona’s heart raced, the sharp sting of jealousy overwhelming her. The girl was dancing against Lucy with her behind. She could barely focus on Salma’s words, every glance toward Lucy driving the knife deeper. Lucy wasn’t pushing them away, wasn’t stopping them. And why would she? Lucy was free to do what she wants, Ona thought bitterly, but the logic didn’t make it any easier. The ache in her chest grew unbearable as one of the girls danced right in front of Lucy. It seemed like she was enjoying the attention, Ona grumbled, Lucy didn’t even budge.
That was it.
“I’ll be back,” Ona muttered to Salma, barely looking at her as she hurried away. Salma’s concerned eyes followed her, but Ona didn’t stop to explain. She needed to get out of there, to breathe, to escape the crushing weight of her own emotions.
She shoved her way through the crowd, her pulse quickening as the noise of the club pressed in on her. Finally, she reached the bathroom, the door closing behind her with a muted thud, shutting out the chaos. Ona leaned over the sink, gripping its edge tightly as she stared at her reflection. Her breath came in sharp, uneven bursts, her vision blurring with unshed tears.
She was just a fling. Just a stupid shag buddy, the words looped in her mind, twisting the knife further. Lucy’s casual comment from earlier echoed painfully; ‘if you want things to be simpler again.’ Was this what simpler meant? Staying distant, pretending the emotions that churned inside her didn’t exist?
She squeezed her eyes shut, biting her lip hard to keep the tears at bay. But it was no use. The frustration, the jealousy, the hurt. It all spilled over. A tear rolled down her cheek, and before she knew it, she was sobbing quietly into her hands, her heart breaking in the small, dark bathroom.
A creak of the door behind her made Ona freeze. Quickly, she wiped at her face, trying to compose herself, but when she glanced in the mirror, she saw Alexia stepping out of one of the stalls. Her brows furrowed in concern as she took in the sight of Ona’s tear-streaked face.
“Ona?” Alexia’s voice was soft but laced with worry. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
Ona shook her head, forcing a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “I’m fine. Just tired,” she said, her voice tight.
Alexia wasn’t convinced. She stepped closer, her gaze searching Ona’s face for the truth. “Tired?” she asked gently, crossing her arms. “You don’t look just tired.”
Swallowing hard, Ona turned away from the mirror, avoiding Alexia’s piercing stare. “I think I’m going to head home. I just… I need some air.”
Alexia studied her for a moment longer, her concern deepening, but finally, she nodded. “If you need to leave, go ahead. But if something’s bothering you… you can talk to me, you know?”
Ona gave a weak smile, her chest tight with the effort of holding everything in. “I know. Thanks, Alexia. I’ll see you later.”
Without waiting for a response, Ona slipped past her and out of the bathroom. She wove her way through the crowded club, brushing off questions from her teammates about where she was going. “Just tired,” she repeated to Patri, Pina, and the others, giving a strained smile. “I’m heading home.”
They let her go without pressing further, and soon, Ona found herself outside, the cool night air hitting her skin like a slap. Her breath came in shaky bursts as she hurried down the street, trying to hold back the tears threatening to spill over again.
Fuck.
She was supposed to drive Lucy home.
Fuck it, Lucy could ask those whores for a ride.
At that thought her tears started flowing again.
.. from this point on: Lucy’s pov..
The team was inside the club for a while now but Lucy was beginning to feel uncomfortable. At first, dancing with Mariona and the other girls had been fun, but the attention she was getting from the random girls who had drifted over to flirt was starting to grate on her.
She tried to brush it off, to enjoy the night with her team, but the way the girls lingered, pressing closer, was making her feel trapped.
Her mind was elsewhere. It was on Ona. Ona, Ona, Ona.
She had been thinking about Ona the whole night. Her feelings for the beautiful Spaniard had deepened in ways she hadn’t expected, but she needed to be discreet about it, for Ona’s sake.
As she glanced around the club, she realized she hadn’t seen Ona for a while. Where was she?
Lucy finally excused herself from the pushy girls, slipping past them with a polite smile, but inside she felt unsettled. She made her way to the bar, ordering a Coke. She’d had a couple of glasses of wine earlier at dinner, but now the idea of drinking anything stronger made her uneasy.
Especially with those girls hanging around like vultures. The thought made her feel gross, like she was prey being circled. They were way too clingy for her liking.
“Hey, have you seen Ona?” Lucy asked Mariona, who had followed her to the bar. Her voice was louder now, trying to cut through the music.
Mariona shook her head, then turned to Pina, standing a step away. “Have you seen Ona?”
Pina nodded, sipping her drink. “Yeah, she left a while ago. Said she was tired.”
“Tired?” Lucy’s frown deepened, a creeping worry settling in her chest. “How long ago?”
“Like 10 minutes ago,” Pina said, “she didn’t look good. Her eyes where red, but she said she was just tired.”
Lucy’s stomach twisted with worry. Red eyes? Could it be from crying? She debated whether she should text or call, but if Ona had left because she was tired, the last thing she wanted to do was wake her. She didn’t want to overstep, but the nagging feeling in her chest wouldn’t let go.
“Yeah, she looked a bit sad,” Paños said sharply, her eyes locking onto Lucy with an intensity that made Lucy’s nerves spike. She moved closer, her gaze hard and unrelenting. After turning briefly to her girlfriend, whispering something, “A beer for me, please. I’ll be back in a bit. You wait here, babe, inside.” She walked closer to Lucy.
Lucy barely had time to process what was happening before Paños turned her attention fully to her, voice quiet but cold and commanding. “You, outside. Now.” She said in her ear.
Lucy’s frown deepened as confusion swirled. Had she done something wrong? She grabbed her jacket and followed Paños out into the cold December air, the chill biting at her skin. It was late, probably past midnight, but the icy breeze was nothing compared to the tension building in her chest.
Lucy turned around as soon as they were outside, her breath visible in the cold air. “So, wha—”
She didn’t get to finish. A hard shove sent her stumbling backward, catching her completely off guard. She searched for balance, her body crashing into a streetlamp, the cold iron digging into her back. She winced, gasping as the impact knocked the breath out of her.
“What the fuck, Sa—”
The sharp sting of a slap cut her off mid-sentence, her head snapping to the side. Pain radiated across her cheek, her hand instinctively flying up to touch the burning skin. “Ouch! What—”
“Lucía!” Paños growled, gripping Lucy’s chin with rough hands, forcing her to meet her gaze.
Lucy blinked, stunned. What the hell was happening? Did Paños have too much to drink? Why was she doing this?
“I don’t think you’re in any position to act so innocent,” Paños hissed through gritted teeth, her voice dripping with… she didn’t know, was it disgust? “I know everything, and I don’t understand what Ona even sees in you. Or saw.” She spat on the ground, her disgust palpable. “The way you treat her - it’s fucking disgusting. To think I called you a friend? I despise you.”
Lucy felt her knees weaken, the weight of Sandra’s words sinking in like stones. Tears welled in her eyes, her throat tightening. Had Ona told Sandra? Did everyone now know? Did they all think she was pathetic? Her mind spun wildly, shame and fear mixing into a sickening knot in her stomach. She knew Ona was out of her league, that this arrangement between them was something she was lucky to have. But now… did Ona hate her so much that she sent Sandra to do this? Was she really that revolting to everyone?
“Why are you crying?” Sandra scoffed, her voice mocking. “Don’t act like a little bitch now. Big guy in there, but a coward here, huh?” She shoved Lucy again, this time harder, luckily she didn’t fall as she still had the pole in her back. “I saw you two, you know. Outside the restaurant, you were kissing with Ona in the car.”
Lucy’s jaw dropped, her brows knitting together in confusion. What was this even about? This had to be the most baffling, brutal scolding she’d ever experienced.
“I observed you two,” Sandra continued, her grip tightening painfully around Lucy’s chin, making sure she had her full attention. Lucy’s heart pounded in her chest as she hung on every word, her mind racing to make sense of it all. “At the wardrobe, before dinner, you were sweet—helping her with her jacket and purse. I thought, ‘Okay, they’re finally going to tell us.’ But during dinner, what did I see? Ona looking at you the entire night, and you ignoring her. Not once did you acknowledge her. Not once.” Sandra’s voice cracked slightly, her whisper laced with a raw kind of fury. “Who ignores their girlfriend?”
“I—” Lucy tried to speak, her voice shaky, but Sandra’s sharp glare silenced her.
“Shut the fuck up,” Sandra snapped, her voice darker, more dangerous now. “I haven’t even told you the worst part yet. After you ignored her all night, Ona was at the bar, talking with some of the girls. Guess who she was looking for? Guess what she saw?” Sandra’s finger jabbed into Lucy’s chest with each accusation, making her wince. “She saw her secret girlfriend dancing with a couple of pathetic, easy girls who throw themselves at any footballer they can get their hands on.”
Lucy’s tears spilled over.
Sandra scoffed, shaking her head in disgust. “You’re even worse than I thought.” She spat on the ground again, her expression cold and unforgiving. “You’re cheaper than a 76-year-old whore.”
Sandra turned to leave, but Lucy, barely holding herself together, grabbed her jacket, desperate to say something to explain. “W-wait, I-”
..
A couple of hours had passed since that painful encounter. After Sandra had let go of her anger and frustration, Lucy had managed to explain herself, though the words had come out shaky and uncertain. She told Sandra everything. She had told about her feelings for Ona, how confused she was, how she hadn’t known what to do or say. It had all come spilling out, the words, her thoughts, her insecurities leaving her mouth until there was nothing left to hide.
Sandra had listened, the intensity in her eyes softening slightly. Then, much to Lucy’s surprise, she apologized. It wasn’t a warm apology, but there was something genuine in it. She hadn’t known the whole story. She hadn’t realized how deeply Lucy cared. Her girlfriend had come outside eventually, seemingly thinking it taken way too long. But the third person with them had been nice, offering a bit of calm next to the lingering tension. In the end, the two of them had brought Lucy home, making sure she was okay before leaving her infront of her building.
Now, Lucy laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, the events of the night spinning in her head. She felt exhausted but couldn’t sleep, her thoughts were too loud, her emotions felt too raw. Sandra’s words echoed in her mind. Was Ona really looking at her in love? What did that even mean? It couldn’t be mutual right, how could Ona want to be her girlfriend too. She had just wanted something casual.
Lucy turned over in bed, pulling the blanket tighter around herself, but it didn’t help. She couldn’t stop thinking about it. About how Ona had looked at her during dinner, the subtle glances across the table, the way their eyes had met for just a second before Ona had looked away. She hadn’t imagined that, no, she had seen it with her own two eyes. She did her best to respect their secrecy, but every time she did bend and glanced over, Ona was looking at her too.
But was she looking at her with heart-eyes? Lucy’s mind raced. Had it been there all along, right in front of her, and she’d just been too blind to see it? Too scared to acknowledge it?
Her chest tightened at the thought. She wanted to believe that Ona felt the same way, that the connection between them was mutual, but doubt still gnawed at her.
What if Sandra was wrong? What if Ona doesn’t feel the same?
But then, her mind drifted back to the moments that had made her fall for Ona in the first place. She closed her eyes, memories flooding her senses like a tide she couldn’t stop.
The late-night drives after games, when the world seemed quieter, and it was just the two of them talking about everything and nothing. The recent mornings when she’d wake up with the sleepy Spaniard in her arms, their dogs jumping on the bed, when she would make breakfast to give Ona a few moments more too sleep and the perfect smile that greeted her when she woke her with some soft kisses.
And then there were the times on the pitch, the way Ona would flash her that grin as she was better at something. The way her eyes would light up when they won a match together, whether it was during training or a real one. Those moments when Lucy had felt something shift inside her, something deep and undeniable.
She was in love with Ona.
She loved the way Ona’s mind worked. And the way how even her flaws where perfect, flaws that were only cute on this girl. This girl. Ona. Ona Batlle Pascal, the girl that had been slowly taking over her mind. Ever since that moment she had seen her on Staniforth’s wedding.
She had had the best night ever that day. She had wanted to reach out to the girl, but it felt wrong to hit someone up who was 8 years younger then she was. She wanted to keep thing at Ona, let her make a move if she was in to it too.
Then the thing at the hotel had happened. She had felt bad about it, because she was the one initiating the cuddles every time, but the thing that had happened had been all Ona. After that they had agreed on friends with benefits. It had been what Ona wanted right? Lucy tried hard to remember how exactly things had gone. Had she filled things in for Ona? Afraid of what Ona really thought? Keeping in charge so she wouldn’t be hurt?
Lucy’s eyes snapped open, her heart pounding in her chest. She couldn’t keep doing this, she thought, her mind racing. She couldn’t keep pretending that this was just casual, that she didn’t care as much as she did. The ache in her chest had become too much to bear.
She had to tell her.
The thought hit her with such clarity that it made her breath catch. She couldn’t go on like this—hiding her feelings, pretending everything was fine when it wasn’t. She needed Ona. Needed her in ways she hadn’t fully realized until tonight. Especially after this night, God, Ona must feel horrible. She felt dirty, being seen by Ona like that. She hadn’t thought about it like that. Ugh, she was such a dumb bitch sometimes, she hadn’t even registered the girls until they where already dancing too close to her, invading her personal space.
She closed her eyes again. Trying to push the thoughts away, maybe even trying to fall asleep.
The truth was, she couldn’t sleep without Ona. Not anymore. The night spent apart felt empty, cold. Every night she wasn’t wrapped in Ona’s arms, she felt like she was missing something vital.
She had to tell her. The words repeated in her head like a mantra. She had to make up for the bad impression she had made. She needed to tell Ona, even it meant losing their arrangement.
Lucy tossed and turned.
Eventually as the alarm clock said 05:38, she decided on an ice bath.
Then she would at least be awake when facing Ona.
And that was if Ona wanted to face her.
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