#'figuring out your gender/sexual identity is chill af'

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

Feeling very violent rn so here's a very controversial opinion:

Everything after season one of Young Justice sucked.

Look, I know I'm obsessed with the show but that doesn't mean it's good, it means that I'm too deep into it at this point to get out. There are good moments within the other seasons but in general? They were not good.

I'm sorry. I understand that they wanted to be creative and have a neat narrative and deep lore and all that. And they do! The narrative and lore is extremely deep.

But the plot? The characters??

Season one was an actual functional show that balanced character development, plot and dialogue with world building, lore and messaging.

The other seasons do not do that.

Season two bounced back and forth between like 16 characters. We got some development for some characters but even that was minimal compared to the character development in S1. And this isn't me complaining that the og group wasn't in S2 enough. That's not my issue. I would've loved to focus on a new group and I think that Jaime, Bart, Ed and Gar would've been super cool to focus on. I loved what character development they did have and I craved more.

But the problem? The problem is when you have 16 fucking characters that you are trying to develop and shove into a coherent plot and have actual meaningful scenes. There just wasn't enough focus on S2. Imo, S2 was meh because the characters got left by the wayside. The plot, dialogue, world building, lore and messaging was fine, there just seemed to be a lack of heart/warmth in the show because of the characters. It's hard to get invested.

Then holy shit. S3 introduced more characters. And the plot got more contrived and 'big picture' to the point that it started to abstract. It felt like nothing mattered. There were no stakes, you were just watching things happen. There was 50 fucking things happening an episode and 80% of it was lore/world building. It felt like I was studying for a fictional history exam.

I'm pretty sure the main character in S3 was earth 16. Just the entire universe. Because goddamn. We checked in on almost every living being and EVERYTHING was a plot point. Most of it wasn't even relevant to anything happening in the season. Man it was.... it was bad.

And at that point it just wasn't enjoyable at all to watch. I probably should've stopped watching but at that point the sunk cost fallacy had already kicked in. I knew it could be good. Maybe it could be good again. And people were constantly praising it as cinematic genius so I was like 'okay well maybe I'm missing the point? Maybe you aren't supposed to enjoy shows? Maybe this is fine?'

But season four broke me.

The creators heard that people were frustrated by the lack of character focus and the episodes following 72 characters and the episodes switching between 50 different subplots every episode and their solution? Their solution was to take allllllll the different unconnected plots and, instead of evenly spreading them throughout the season, jam them all into 'arcs'. So you had a bunch of mini seasons consisting of 3-5 episodes dedicated to a cast of ~5-8 characters (some of them new). And each of these episodes had unconnected a plots, b plots and c plots.

THAT IS NOT A SOLUTION

Holy shit that is not a solution.

Not to mention the overarching plot of the season, in which we had no fucking clue what was happening until the final episodes where everything became a speedrun to wrap everything up. We literally had no idea what the main plot was until it was ending.

Good god it was bad. It's bad writing!

I know people liked it and good for them. You should like what you like and you don't have to justify it. But for me it was insanity. I'm sorry I actually don't want a season long subplot where Beast Boy is depressed and sleeps all day. I would be cool with it if it had anything to do with the larger story but, surprisingly, spending five minutes watching Beast Boy sleep every episode didn't make for compelling storytelling.

I'm still not over how we didn't even know who the main villain was until the end of the season. And then all of a sudden he does a villain monologue to tell everyone his evil plan and his motives. Super cool actually. I love it when I have no idea what the stakes are for the majority of a show. It's incredibly good storytelling when you leave the audience in the dark about a major player in the plot for all of the plot. And then doing an info dump evil monologue in the final episodes to rush through the explanation??? Fucking fantastic and not a sign of terrible pacing at all.

I'm just so frustrated. The show isn't about being a show anymore. The show is an entire cinematic universe shoved into 20 something episodes. It's desperate to tell every single story at once, audience, pacing and good writing be damned.

I'm so tired of the constant praising of Greg. His whole 'i don't write endings because life doesn't have endings' and 'i don't write cliffhangers, I just leave things open ended' thing is pretentious bullshit. I'm tired of pretending it's not. A good story has an ending. Stories are not life! Some of the best shows I've ever watched had planned endings. And oh my god. The cliffhanger thing... that's just semantics my guy. Greg you write cliffhangers. You can insist they aren't but I'm going to call a spade a spade.

It's also.... I'm fine with explaining things, in fact I love it because it's an excuse to talk about the stuff I love, and I have a fairly decent knowledge of comic book lore. So, I could not only understand what was happening in the show but I was also super enthusiastic about explaining it to people. But hey Greg? Hey buddy? If 90% of your audience doesn't know what the fuck is going on and needs to be familiar with super specific obscure comic characters from the 70's then you might have a problem.

I think I realized halfway through s4 that the most enjoyment I got from an episode was when an obscure comic character would cameo in it. But then I realized that a) they generally weren't explained at all and b) 50% of the time they weren't just hanging out in the background and they were vital to the plot. So to understand who the fuck they were and what the fuck was happening you had to be familiar with... well all of DC comics actually.

Anyway this rant is getting long and unhinged and I don't think there's a point so I'm going to cut myself off even though I have so much more to say on the topic. I think my general point is just that I didn't enjoy watching the later seasons and it's chill if you did and we should all respect each other's opinions ✌️

[scarletwelly-boots]

In honor of Pride, I’m sharing my LGBT Disney headcanon identities. Some have maybe one detail in their narratives that I took and ran with, and some are more commonly considered queer or queer-coded (or at least have more signs that I picked up on). Happy Pride!

Mulan: Genderfluid. I know that canonically she had reasons to pretend to be a man and that after she was discovered she dressed more typically feminine, but I have read some truly fantastic Genderfluid!Mulan fics, and as a genderfluid person who has grown up fascinated by Mulan, I like to view her as like me.

Shang: Bisexual. C’mon, did you not see his face when Mulan kicked him over that first time?! Boy was in love with her before she was outed. 

Ling/Yao/Chien Po: Poly. Yes, I know they have a whole song about girls and in the sequel they marry a bunch of princesses, but they were super close friends and had really good chemistry, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they all got together. 

Sebastian: Gay. That blue crab in the Under the Sea number is his boyfriend. And my name is Bastien and I’m gay, so Sebastian is also gay. I don’t make the rules. 

Ursula: Trans. Listen. This is the epitome of queer-coded villains. She was designed after a drag queen. I’m not saying all drag queens are trans, but a lot of historically labeled drag queens have since turned out to actually probably be trans. And there isn’t a point where she’s not presenting as a woman, so she’s likely not just in drag. 

Melody/Henry (Prince Charming): trans. OH MY GOD. This is my most bonkers Disney conspiracy theory. I’m sorry in advance for the long story with this one. So a year or two ago I fell down a YouTube rabbit hole about Disney theories and crossover theories. One theory was that there was (albeit conspiracy-esque) evidence to suggest Ariel is Prince Charming AKA Henry’s mom. The main reason I remember is that both are ginger, but I know there were other details. So the video creator was trying to figure out what happened to Melody between Little Mermaid II and Cinderella, but never thought Melody and Henry might be the same person. My theory based on this: Henry IS Melody. After LM2 he realized he was trans. It fits with the crossover theory without needing to explain why Melody was not at her potential-brother’s wedding. I know there’s a lot of conditions for this to work, but I think it makes more sense than the Melody and Charming are siblings but Melody is inexplicably MIA theory.

Lumiere and Cogsworth: Gay. Come on. Obviously. I will also accept that Lumiere is bi/pan and in a relationship with Cogsworth and Babette or w/e her name is. Doesn’t work as well with the live action BatB, but maybe Cogsworth is married and Lumiere is dating the feather duster and they’re also dating each other?

LeFou: Gay. Like even before the live action this much was obvious. Gaston should’ve A.) treated him way better, and B.) opened his goddamn eyes and stopped chasing Belle. (I’m on the fence about Gaston’s possible queerness though.)

Hades: Gay. I recently heard that James Woods, Hades’s VA, is homophobic. So now I’m headcanoning this out of spite in addition to, I’m sorry MF-er, but you played this guy ridiculously queer-coded. He’s gay. Deal, Woods. 

Timon/Pumbaa: Do I even have to say it? They raised TWO kids together!!! Gay!!!!

Scar: Gay. That lion was queer-coded to hell and back. I know there’s issues with villains being queer-coded, but if he’s gay, I’m counting him. 

Terk: Lesbian. Duhhh. She’s voiced by Rosie O’Donnell, of course she’s gay! Also all of her friends are guys, which I’m not saying makes you gay, but makes her butch-ness pretty damn overt.

Shere Khan: Gay. Sorry, I might ship him a leeetle bit with Scar. 

Baloo/Bagheera: These two were Timon and Pumbaa before Timon and Pumbaa. They’re gay. No, I will not take constructive criticism.

Jafar: Gay. Man, there is a huge problem with queer-coding villains in Disney. I know he sexually harasses Jasmine, but there could be a few reasons for this (other than the fact that he’s a jackass and needs to STOP): performative heterosexuality or bi. Or power-hungry AF and not caring what he has to do to get it. I’m leaning toward that one.

Genie: Pan or Ace. I could see him going either way. I think he gets a girlfriend in the tv show, so likely either pan or panromantic asexual. 

Elsa: Queer. Obviously.

Side note: I ship Elsa and Cinderella in the Wreck-It Ralph 2!verse. The bedroom eyes they give each other in the loungewear scene?! My gay ass felt that. 

Merida: Ace. C’mon. She’s literally an arrow ace! Isn’t this a thing? “I’ll be shooting for my own hand”???? Girl is ace AF.

Buzz/ Woody: Do I have to say gay? Is it not obvious? Get out of here with that Jessie/ Bo Peep shit. I can play in the poly sandbox just like with Lumiere and Cogsworth. And we do not acknowledge TS4 in this house. That movie was a disgrace. 

Jessie: Lesbian. I’ll take bi or pan if you want to insist she’s in a relationship with Buzz. She’s a cowgirl though.

7 Dwarves: Are they brothers? Or just roommates/coworkers? If they’re brothers, absolutely disregard because I’m not an incest shipper (okay, with the exception of Thorki). Otherwise, poly.

Donald Duck: genderfluid. Have you not seen that post going around of all the times Donald wears a dress and it’s not as a punchline? Donald is genderqueer in some capacity.

Live action BatB Stanley: genderfluid or bigender. He seems pretty chill about wearing typical men’s clothes, but when Madame de Garderobe gives him a dress he’s fucking thrilled. Stanley is me when I put on a binder. Genderfluid.

Kuzco: Pan and bigender. He’s very queer, both gender- and sexuality-related. Like he dresses as a woman in a whole scene and I don’t remember him putting up much of a fight about doing it? I could be wrong.

Feel free to add your own.

[intersectionalpositivity]

Hey i have a question that some might consider offensive even if i don't mean to offend someone. If one identifies as straight but has sexual fantasies of people with the same sex, that doesn't make them less straight, does it? I'm confused af

It’s okay, that’s not an offensive question to ask!

Well…it kinda does make you “less straight,” but that also really depends on how you identify with the word “straight.”

If you’re having sexual fantasies of people of the same gender, and enjoying it, that probably means you’re sexually attracted to them, so you’re likely not heterosexual, since heterosexuality and being straight implies that you’re only attracted to your opposite binary gender and no other. (ignore any straight person who tells you “everybody is attracted to the same gender sometimes, that doesn’t mean you’re not straight” because those are lies. being attracted to your same gender in any way is inherently Not Straight.)

If you already know you’re attracted to your opposite binary gender, then you’re probably on the multisexual spectrum–which basically includes anyone who’s attracted to more than one gender in any way (such as bisexual people, pansexual people, some queer people, some people who don’t use a label, etc).

As shown by the name, the multisexual spectrum IS a spectrum, so a man can be incredibly attracted to women and only a slightly attracted to men and still be on that spectrum, and vice versa. There’s no limit to the diversity of the spectrum. So even if you think you’re only a little bit sexually attracted to the same gender, you could still quite possibly be Not Straight!

Also, a lot of people bury their attraction to their same gender because of internalized homophobia, so it’s quite possible you’re more attracted to your same gender than you thought.

Here are some identities you could use to describe yourself:

heteroflexible - attraction to various genders is a spectrum, and heteroflexible is someone who’s either:

on the “mostly attracted to my opposite gender” side of that spectrum.

willing to make exceptions or be flexible about the genders they get sexually/romantically involved with, even though (to their knowledge) they’re only attracted to their opposite gender.

bisexual - attraction to multiple genders, attraction to more than one gender

pros: large, active community with a long history, most people have heard of it nowadays even if they don’t understand it, chill flag colors

cons: lots of stigma attached

pansexual - attraction to all genders, attraction regardless of gender (explicitly implies support of nonbinary people)

pros: smaller, but growing community, vibrant flag colors, explicit support of nonbinary people

cons: having to deal with “are you attracted to kitchenware” jokes all the time, less visibility and representation (not that there’s much for bi people either)

~

And I know some people also get confused if they’re having sexual fantasies about the same gender yet aren’t interested in dating them, but there’s actually a way to describe that too! It’s called split attraction. If you think you’re sexually attracted to multiple genders, but only romantically attracted to one, that’s entirely possible and valid. An identity you could use to describe this is bisexual heteroromantic, which implies you’re attracted to multiple genders sexually but in regards to romance and dating, you’re only interested in your opposite gender.

If you think any of these might describe you, that’s great, feel free to use them! If you later change your mind, that’s also okay. There’s no need to hurry in figuring out your sexuality/orientation.

[godshotme]

Dream Daddy Asks

Hell prolly no one asked but I’ll answer anyway. Any fellow dad serial dater can get a laugh out of it!

1: Which dad did you romance first? If you have not romanced a dad yet, which one would you want to romance?

I romanced Mat Sella the first cause he had me at the awkwardly calls me baby dialogue like wtf why is he such a cinnamon roll.

2: Favorite dad? Mat, hands up; probably Robert second, he’s nice but he’s a lil abrasive.

3: Least favorite dad? Let’s just say it starts with a JO and ends with a SEPH. He’s a liar, a cheater, and left his children to slaughter a capybara plushie. RIP giant rodent native to South America.

4: Dad that surprised you the most? Hugo; thought he was gonna be the typical bothered teacher, turns out he likes wrestling?!! Cute touch tho.

5: Dad that grew on you the most?

Okay I hated Brian at first and my friends wanted to play his route so I served bitchface real ness the whole time, but his dates are actually kinda wholesome and turns out he just wants to impress us.

6: Any dad(s) that is (are) your type?

Mat, Robert, Hugo; I’m a sucker for facial hair

7: Any dad that you aspire to be more like?

I guess like Mat, for his attentiveness to music; or Craig, his ability to always push himself to the best.

8: Favorite date?

I love Mat but if we are talking a singular date, then Robert second date is the best, the cryptic hunting, the whittling game, and some serious talk. Perfect amount of playfulness and poignance.

9: Favorite series of dates?

Mat and Robert. Mat for the very chill and sweet vibe; Robert for the crazy adventures and emotional moments.

10: Any date(s) that you completely messed up?

Robert third date: I didn’t even get invited to the house cause Quizzmaster Quinn called us out, like bish what, Quinn you better go mind your own business.

11: Any date(s) that you completely aced?

Every Mat date, never used save and load, and got all S first try.

12: Any date in the game that you would want to go on?

Since Mat is my fav, I want our dates to go on forever.

13: Favorite child?

Amanda, because she is so witty, so outspoken, and also has a lot of depth. Plus she opens up to people and tries to do her best to look after people when she can (Carmensita, Daisy). REBEL STATUS +1000 points

14: Favorite side character?

Is Mary a side character? Or probably Pablo. He’s so passionate about life I’m inspired by him. Maybe even Quizzmaster Quinn cause his character development in Hugo’s route is absolutely hilarious yet also heartwarming.

15: Favorite minigame?

Hugo’s penguin game. It’s so old school and funny. Also the little girl who tried to abduct a penguin. Comedy gold.

16: Least favorite minigame?

Mat’s piano game( cause I really want to do a good job for Mat but the mechanic is weird af), or Brian’s fishing game( why do all fish look alike?)

17: Favorite dad pun?

Mat route, second date, Amanda said she’s hungry, Dadsona said Hi hungry I’m dad. THIS IS WHAT WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THE ENTIRETY OF THE GAMEPLAY. Even Amanda realised her grave misstep right after she speaker and tumbled to the floor in defeat.

18: Name of your Dad-sona(s)?

Russell. I wanted to name it after myself but then I realise I’m nowhere as fit as he is.

19: Did you make your Dad-sona a physical reflection of yourself?

Pretty much identical except for the figure. I chose the athletic bod cuz it’s the closest but I’m really just average.

20: Did you see any of yourself in the personality of your Dad-sona?

The part about dirty coffee mugs. That’s 100 percent me. I get this frustration about where to put them so much I wonder if I should just smuggle the dirty mug out so no one would notice I left a filthy mug.

21: Would you actually parent like your Dad-sona?

Totally. With 30% more baked goods though.

22: Would you consider your Dad-sona a “good dad”?

The best. I wish I had a dad like my dadsona.

23: How much time have you logged into the game?

20 hrs or so. Replayed some routes to get all the STEAMY DAD PICS.

24: Any particular moment(s) that resonated with,impacted, or affected you?

When Amanda was cold and distant. Sometimes the important people in our life has some issues and goes elusive. You want to be there but they don’t want you to be there and it pains and worries me so much.

25: Did the game live up to, transcend, or fall short of your expectations?

I think sometimes it transcends but others it kinda underwhelms. In some routes the dialogues are kind of dry. (see Joseph date three, Craig date one), but it impressed me with the fatherhood topic, racial inclusiveness(a blond, a brunette, a redhead, a Latino, a black, an East Asian, a South Asian), gender/sexuality inclusiveness (Damien being transgender/ Hugo being openly gay and adopted a son), and zesty side characters(e.g Mary, Pablo, Quinn).

[sociologicallyinsignificant]

“In a world where nothing is normal anymore (not that normal was ever that great for most of us), one thing has actually become slightly easier: online dating.

It used to be treacherous to wade through a sea of profiles and photos, trying to glean from arbitrary details if someone was a match. “They listen to Solange? They are clearly culturally and socially awa — oh, no they just said that women comedians aren’t funny. Hard swipe left.”

But now that politics is at the forefront of every conversation, debate dominates our feeds and minds, and protests are filling up our nights and weekends, it’s more acceptable to cut to the chase and see where people stand.

This also means it’s easier than ever to spot a basic bitch and back away quickly.

Some believe this new era has created division. I am here for that division.

Some believe this new era has created division. I am here for that division. I am here for saying “fuck nuance.” You either totally get it, or you don’t get it at all. Some people want us to reach across the divide, to listen to each other and come to a compromise. As if the steps to dismantling white supremacist patriarchy are just suggestions that we can pick and choose from, like frozen yogurt toppings.

I will not be reaching across that divide, and I’m certainly not gonna do it in the bedroom. I do not consider spending my energy teaching someone how to be a human being a sexy pursuit. My dating motto in recent years — and especially now — is this: “If it ain’t woke, don’t fuck it.”

The problem lies in actually finding these unicorns. Every dating app is the same because every dating app has the same trash people on it. The only differences in these apps are the interfaces through which to harass or ignore each other.

So, I propose a new app. Let’s call it Snoflake, because we’re all so beautiful and unique and for no other reason. Snoflake will be a safe space where “cucks,” “libtards,” “SJWs,” and “nasty women” can find that special someone. It’s spelled weird because dating app. To join Snoflake you must pass the following 11-question test. Once you pass you are allowed to join and create your profile.

Of course, passing the test is only the first step to finding your perfect socially aware unicorn. After joining the app, you still have to match up on all the usual factors like compatibility, humor, attraction, acting-like-a-grown-ass-person-who-treats-your-sexual-partner-like-a-grown-ass-person-yes-even-if-the-relationship-is-casual, and a billion other things. (Just because someone uses the raised fist emoji on the regs doesn’t mean they won’t be a nightmare in a relationship.) That shit is still up in the air, but at least this test filters out the riffraff and deplorables, taking care of some basic fundamental values up top.

1. Are you a feminist?

a) Absolutely, I am. I hope we can talk about it a lot and learn some new things about feminism together.

b) Nah. I think women should be treated equally, but feminists think women are better than men. The word itself is such a problem, ya know?

c) Feminazis are the worst. Sexism is over. I wish they’d relax and stop complaining. These days men are the real victims.

d) Hell yeah, I’m a feminist. I’m the best feminist. Let me tell you how feminist I am. I’m so feminist I tell every woman I know to stop wearing makeup, because I prefer them without it. I’m so feminist I think we need a matriarchy, because men are inherently the worst and there’s nothing we can do to fix that, so women should be responsible for everything. Now hush and let me keep talking over you to tell you all the things I do for feminism. I am gonna teach you so much about feminism.

2. OK cool. Use the word “intersectionality” correctly in a sentence.

3. You’re at work and your colleague makes a joke that is sexist/racist/homophobic/ableist/etc. You:

a) Call them out on it immediately and explain why it isn’t funny.

b) Roll your eyes and complain to your friends about it later.

c) Politely laugh along, even though you feel uncomfortable, but eventually forget about it.

d) Keep the banter going and top it with an even better joke. That shit is hilarious. People need to stop being so PC and chill out!

4. Julian Assange is ___________.

a) a traitor.

b) a hero.

c) probs a rapist.

d) cool with Nazis.

e) Both c and d.

5. What does cisgender mean? (No Googling, boo.)

6. It’s Halloween! Pick your costume:

a) Donald Trump. He’s so orange and silly and also I have no imagination!

b) An Indian chief with full headdress (still got one from that festival last summer).

c) Probably something topical or a clever pun. I’ll figure it out the week before.

d) Nothing because I am joyless.

7. Which was the best season of RuPaul’s Drag Race?

a) Four, obviously. But six and eight are pretty great. (Also, I know the show can be problematic, but I can watch it with a critical eye while still appreciating the brilliant things about it.)

b) OMG I totes wanna watch it, but I just haven’t had time yet. Maybe we could Drag Race and Chill sometime? (Also, I’ve heard the show can be problematic, but I can watch it with a critical eye while still appreciating the brilliant things about it.)

c) Is that like a NASCAR show? Haven’t heard of it.

d) I do not watch television because I am joyless.

8. Name three Manic Pixie Dream Girls from popular media and explain why they are problematic.

9. Black Lives Matter

a) True

b) True

c) Actually, I prefer to say “All Lives Matter” because I am an ignorant piece of shit.

d) True

10. How did Donald Trump win the 2016 U.S. Presidential election?

a) By running on a platform of white supremacy and misogyny, appealing to conservative white America’s desire to maintain power over marginalized groups, and capitalizing on the complicity of liberal white Americans who benefit from that power and didn’t take enough accountability to change it.

b) He listened to the white working classes (aka America’s most oppressed and forgotten group) and promised to make their lives great again with his dope business skills.

c) Hillary’s emails and identity politics. Seriously, she’s the worst. And it didn’t help that women, queer folk, and people of color wouldn’t shut up about wanting some human rights. If they’d piped down and appeased white guys we wouldn’t be in this mess. Also Bernie would’ve won, and it has nothing to do with gender, okay?

11. Are you woke?

a) I’m woke AF and always have been.

b) You can’t call yourself woke, just like you can’t give yourself a nickname. I’m uncomfortable using that word, not only because it is often misappropriated, but because I still have a lot to learn and always will.

c) Do you mean awake? Say it correctly. I am a grammar snob, because I am joyless.

Good luck and swipe ya later on Snoflake!

A note: It’s important to remember that this kind of awareness is a journey, not a destination. Plenty of my friends would get a few of these wrong and they are wonderful people. So if you don’t pass this test right away, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It just means you can’t join my dating app.”