#''''forced soulmates''''' as haechan said that one time and i loved it so much

[saebaragi]

idk i love markhyuck's "we BECAME soulmates" agenda because that's what I think soulmates are too, something we become instead of just are, yk?

[kiachiako]

april nct recs

my library of favorites from APR <3 all creds to authors

[ sorted by word count ]

series

JAEMIN | better than your next (i'm the next) | @ddeonuism 11.9k [ part one ]

RENJUN | messenger | @dojunie — smau | You find a phone number written on the mirror of the Sulim Library's second floor bathroom. It’s scrawled messily across the glass in erasable expo marker, the handwriting underneath almost closer to hieroglyphics than lettering— and what you thought it read, was ‘SEND DUCK PICS FOR A GOOD TIME.’ (You suppose, in hindsight, it was a good thing this person’s penmanship was so shit— because if you knew what it really said, you might have never stumbled across the oddly intriguing inbox of one Huang Renjun.)

oneshots

[m] JAEHYUN | seeds of pomegranates | @anashins 29.5k — The day the god of the underworld steals you away, he expects to have found a timid wife to make his isolated life more bearable. Little does he know that the rose he picked from the garden called earth bears knives instead of thorns, and he might not have found a timid wife, but a queen with a heart as dark as his.

[m] JAEHYUN | hearts are won at practice | @angelwonie 21.2k — jung jaehyun is an obnoxious, way too handsome footballer whom you have no intention of getting to know. at least until a series of coincidences forces you to spend time with him, and you realize there might be more to him than what meets the eye.

CHENLE | potential | @rrxnjun 20k — rich kids au, childhood friends au, friends with benefits au. angst, fluff, suggestive | You saw his potential without seeing credentials. And maybe that's the issue.

[m] HAECHAN | monochrome | @sundaysundaes — Lee Donghyuck once believed in the concept of soulmates—how fate would connect a red thread from one lover to another, in a form of dreams and memories. That was how his parents met, that was how they claimed their happiness, and he wanted nothing more but to live his life the way they lived theirs. Until one day, as he sees her slipping away from his hands, he has no choice but to stop believing entirely.

CHENLE | i still love you | @xiaodejunletsact 17.4k — high school can be complicated. thats why when your crush of three years, zhong chenle, approaches you out of nowhere offering to drive you home you are right to question his intentions.

HAECHAN | free trial wedding style | @liliansun 10.6k — when a random, cute, guy comes up to you and practically asks for you to follow along, you do so without much thought. that is until you get home and see he’s your new neighbor who just might need your help a little more than you expected.

[m] HAECHAN + MARK | the girl is mine | @luvrkives 10.5k — mark and hyuck can't stop fighting over you. who fucks you better, who makes you laugh more, who you like most, who fucks you better, yada yada yada. but honestly, why argue when you would happily take them both?

JAEHYUN | love you goodbye | @serendipityseulgi 10.3k — the one with the story of dysfunctional love between you and jaehyun. aka, you both want different things and your love isn��t always enough.

[m] JOHNNY | color evasion | @ncteez 8.7k — or the one where you join a kink website and a specific dom’s profile catches your attention enough to actually meet him at a hotel and practically ignore your safe words bc man, he’s good. 

[m] HAECHAN + JAEHYUN | mine too | @waithyuck 7.5k — donghyuck x jaehyun x reader (f), smut, basically pwp

JAEHYUN | eye of affection | @aitarose 6.6k — for as long as he can remember, jaehyun’s world has been in black and white - giving him no reason to appreciate his mother’s profession as an artist and the beauties that art can provide. however, an accidental meeting with you gives him reason to doubt his former beliefs - proving to him that there may be true beauty in a world that’s void of everything bright, that beauty being the sunshine that you provide. 

HAECHAN | full of love (and stars) | @httplastic 6k — friends/roommates to lovers, light angst

[m] HAECHAN | unavoidable | @sunpopz 5.8k — after swearing to yourself you're done catching feelings for people; you meet someone who makes that incredibly difficult. you think you can avoid him... then you're assigned a final together.

RENJUN | hard to let go | @cinnajun 4.3k — your high school friend group had an ambiguous and messy end, and you never got any closure for anything. two years later, and lee donghyuck’s girlfriend lives on the same floor as you, and you’re forced to face huang renjun, whose abandonment hurt you the most.

HAECHAN | she's quiet | @ijuliet 3.4k — although you were not looking to make new friends, the ones you had tried their hardest to push you out of your comfort zone to find something abnormal for you. which is why you’re at a frat party on a thursday night, watching as lee donghyuck observes you from afar.

[m] HAECHAN | all bark no bite | @jjsneo 2.5k — lee haechan is the most annoying man you’ve ever encountered. but that doesn’t mean you don’t find him hot; and maybe that’s why he has you flat on his mattress one night at a random frat party.

JAEHYUN | in the rain | @sehunniepotwrites 1.9k — All this time, you were looking for love in the wrong places and in the wrong people. As a serial dater, you never thought you would find it in the pouring rain and in the person you trusted the most. 

. . .

ur fav recs n fics blog is back hehe | happy reading <3

xoxo

[hannie-dul-set]

who in nct dream would agree to platonically kiss you

i said i was busy but i got too tired putting my braincells to work so i decided to give them a three hour vacation. i already did mark and haechan in the 127 version, but i believe that 127 markhyuck and dream markhyuck are completely different entities so here is an alternative. enjoy.

127 ver. / seventeen ver.

mark: okay. he's a little bit iffy about premarital hand holding, so kissing is out of the question. but since it's you, he's willing to swallow his virtues and agree if and ONLY if: (1) the won't last longer than 2 seconds, (2) no one else is looking, (3) there is no tongue involved and if you can do it without any lip-to-lip contact as well, even better, and (4) in the case of any violation of the aforementioned, he will call his mom and lawyer (doyoung) to have you write a handwritten apology and keep you away from his line of vision in case he starts projecting himself into the sun | rating: 4/10 do u need a third party mediator as well, marky.

renjun: will NOT do it for the life of him wtf how dare you present the idea of kissing without feelings? unless. unless you provoke him like "tch, never thought you had the balls anyway" and then his longtime desire to have a slowburn 40k soulmate au-esque f2l romance gets underhandedly overpowered by the sudden desire to prove you wrong— then he will kiss you. not only kiss you. he will date you. marry you. start a family with you because huang renjun's spite knows no bounds | rating: 6/10 you got more than you bargained unless that was your aim in the first place then good job.

jeno: you probably asked him because you know jeno is innately unable to say no to anything anyone asks of him. you know he'll say yes without even fully ingesting the weight of your request. fuck he can't back out now, you'll probably hate him. oh shit wait you're getting close already what the fuck oh my god he isn't ready yet holy shit WAIT— and he's a goner. you barely grazed his lips because he's suddenly not moving anymore. it took him ten days to look at you without his face immediately turning beet red | rating: 8/10 he'll get over it, maybe.

haechan: his reaction will pretty much be the same as here, but if you really want to kiss him with no strings attached, you just have to mask it as a musical rehearsal then he will go above and beyond what you asked him to. he will even swear revenge for you, his now dead lover, against the evil forces that took you away from him "hyuck, we don't have to do this part of the (fake) script" "MY DEAREST MOST ARDENT LOVE, I WILL SACRIFICE MY BLOOD TO AVENGE YOU" "donghyuck" | rating: 3/10 because he finds out you tricked him and now you're forced to rent an entire theatre so that his rehearsals will not go to waste.

jaemin: do you....think....you need to ask..? one look and he's already pouncing on you. you don't know how long he's been waiting for this shit. | rating: 10/10. emphasis on the platonic. don't get your hopes up.

chenle: it depends on how you ask. and his mood. and the time of day. it's a gamble. if the question arises while you're three hours into digging around renjun's room because there's nothing else to do, he's up for a smooch or two. but if it's something that you need help with— like a ploy to fool your ex or friends or something— then be prepared to sacrifice a quarter of a limb, more than half of your dignity, and maybe even a span of your life because chenle is gonna exploit your helplessness for the sake of entertainment. this is the prologue of the fake dating scenario. plan meticulously, soldier | rating: ??? like i said, it depends.

jisung: immediately says no because he doesn't want you to get pregnant | rating: 0/10 jisung can't be a dad yet.

[slightlymore]

hardest to love

part of the ‘soulmates collection’

surgeon!doyoung x surgeon!fem reader

others: haechan, jaemin, jeno

genre: medical au (but the medical part is not heavy), romance, angst, smut, fantasy elements, “enemies” to lovers, mutual pining 

warnings: +18, esplicit sexual content: doyoung is a hard dom and a soft dom in different scenes, short instances of sub doyoung, finger sucking (I know, I have a hand kink), spanking, raw, ice play, fingering, dry humping, thigh riding, choking, use of "sir", orgasm control and denial, edging, overstimulation, light degradation, oral f, brat taming, safe word, wine play?; lots of teasing; swearing; discussion around death; doyoung is a jerk but gets better

words: 13k

note: you can read this as a stand alone without having read the other works in the soulmate collection. what you need to know: haechan, jeno and jaemin travel different universes with the purpose of getting doyoung and yn be together. mark is trying to do the opposite. sometimes doyoung can remember past lives and sometimes he can't. this life takes place in a hospital. if you're confused by the three boys’ story everything will be explained in their backstory fics coming soon. 

__________

Haechan let out a single deep sigh. 

“Damn it. Doyoung is a fucking jerk in this life.”

The three young men were standing in the corner of the room watching two students trembling mortified in front of a pissed off Doyoung before he could turn around on his heels. 

“I thought he was a jerk in all lives,” Jeno commented while dusting off imaginary lice off his jacket. 

"I’ll be honest. When you said 'hell' I didn't expect the ER."

“Well have you ever been to-” Haechan continued but stopped when noticing Jeno not listening to him anymore but observing their third friend instead. 

“Hey, Jaemin?” Jeno put one hand on his shoulder. 

Jaemin was weak and paler than usual, eyes wide and with a slightly trembling chin. He then followed the direction of the younger gaze and gasped himself. 

“Yeah,” Haechan grated the back of his head. “I’m sorry. I told you this one is going to be hard.” 

Jaemin gulped, looking at himself walking around the bed and checking on the patients. 

That Jaemin looked exactly like him. 

The only difference was the clothes. That doppelganger had a doctor gown instead of a sweatshirt. 

“How is this possible? I don’t understand how I can be here and there at the same time.”

Haechan sighed at Jaemin’s comment. 

“You could consider it time travel. Now, listen to me.” 

Jaemin let himself be grabbed by Haechan’s hands, pressing on both of his arms and looked at the other’s intense eyes. 

“You have to avoid yourself while we work and-,” he stopped as if making sure to have Jaemin’s whole attention, “-you can’t talk to her.” 

As if Haechan’s voice was a spell that summons people, Jaemin raised his gaze from him to look behind Haechan’s shoulder where a woman was slowly walking the corridor, eyebrows furrowed trying to understand the medical records she was carrying. 

“Shit,” Haechan silently cursed and, placing one hand on Jaemin’s cheek, he indicated to keep quiet by putting one finger on his own lips. 

If Jaemin weren’t so weak in the limbs upon seeing her, he would have felt the tingle on his skin coming from Haechan’s palm, or he would have realized that the woman walked past them as if they were all invisible. 

Jeno, arms crossed on his chest, followed the woman with his eyes then nodded once as to indicate that the path was clear. 

“Why can’t I talk to her?” 

Jaemin’s head wanted to turn around and catch another glimpse but Haechan didn’t move his hand from his face yet. 

“You might, I promise. But only when I say so.” 

“Haechan and I can shapeshift and become invisible but you can’t and we won’t be around to babysit you all the time. Do your part and stay out of trouble.”

"You look mean,” Jaemin mumbled. 

"I am. Now move."

__________

A breath. 

A deep and heavy breath. 

He was hearing it inside his skull. His own irregular breath inside his own skull. 

Then a loud ringing suffocated every other sound in Doyoung’s ears. Like tinnitus, he thought, so used to elaborate information by classifying it into boxes.  

The man was looking at his hands as if they were not his, fingers gripping the defibrillator pads, watching how the chest underneath them rose and fell. 

Again. 

And again. 

A machine. The defibrillator and Doyoung. 

And that body as well. 

But it was too broken to be fixed. 

And when he barely heard the nurse’s question he straightened his back. “Time of death,” he inhaled, his hands now uncovering the wristwatch, “2:41 am,” he exhaled.

__________

Doyoung felt it inside his hands, under the skin. 

It was uncomfortable. 

He looked at his left palm and wished it trembled. 

"A surgeon," the announcement came in the form of a hard pat on the shoulders.

 Doyoung blinked surprised and put his glasses back up on the nose. 

"Great hands," the professor shook them with vigour, his eyes wide open and intense. "Steady," the old man continued his litany of compliments. 

Doyoung let him wiggle his arms for a few more seconds before sighing as another student grabbed the professor's attention. 

The young boy looked down at his hands as well after the man turned his back. 

His eyes scanned every line in his palms as if seeing them for the first time. 

"Those hands will do big things in the future" and Doyoung now, shoulders heavy, moist fringe patted on his forehead in the humidity of the terrace, felt like cutting his hands off. 

Yes. Big things. 

Like playing with life and death. 

Didn't you just kill a man? he asked his hands, lower lip trembling instead of his steady fingers. Huh? and you're fine? 

Doyoung tightened his fists with disgust and punched the air while letting them fall with force to his sides. 

The rain intensified and he stepped in the front further until feeling the cold and heavy drops hit his face. Their sound was chaotic and it calmed Doyoung's heart. 

Again. 

I can do it again. I've done it before. 

I do it again. 

I can get over it. 

He opened up his hands under the rain until he started to not feel his fingertips anymore. 

Then he walked back inside the hospital.

__________

When you had to deal with the first dying patient, you were paralyzed. 

It was very early in the morning. Your head was still full of the dreams you had just a while ago. Your heart was full of life and excitement for finally being able to work in the field. 

"Get your shit together."

That voice startled you. 

Doctor Kim, the most ruthless and cold person you've ever met, was your supervisor as an intern. 

You looked up at him and caught his dark eyes on that spectrally pale face. 

You just moved. You had no idea what you were doing. Terrified, you let your body work automatically. 

Doctor Kim was calm and efficient while your whole mind felt out of place. 

Oh, God. Oh God, please. 

And when his voice finally reached your ears as if from far away you sunk down on your knees. 

"Good job everyone." 

The kindest thing he has ever said to his interns.

The other vaguely kind thing was his introductory discourse. 

"I know that interning at the ER is dreadful, but that's life."

He was staring you all down, a short line of fresh out of med school trembling kids, no one having the courage to meet his eyes. 

"You have to be ready to see all sorts of things here. Okay, let's go."

And that was it. 

The encouragement of his introductory discourse. 

You'll feel like shit here, welcome. 

You hated him and you swore to yourself that you won’t behave the same. 

Ever. 

He was like a souless machine, walking around and tending to his duties. Lost in thoughts as your eyes scanned his figure walking busily around the hospital, you actually wondered if he had feelings at all. 

The first time you saw Doctor Kim actually show some type of sentiment, was when he exited the surgery room one day. 

You were walking around with the others and checking on the patients when he walked through the corridor like a storm. It was unclear what type of feeling that was but it made you unable to stop staring at his side of the face and back as he entered his office. 

The anaesthetist came out soon after, slowly and sighing deeply. 

And then you understood. 

You've lived many of those days afterwards until you had to welcome your own row of interns. 

You smiled and did a nice short welcoming discourse. 

And at that moment you, unfortunately, got what Doctor Kim meant when he was brusque with you in the beginning. 

It took you all three years of residency to finally get it: there were no actual right words to tell the students and there was no point in giving fake hope that everything is going to be alright. 

Still, there was no point in being a rude ass like him. So you at least smiled kindly and encouraged your students. 

God knew they needed it even more now.

You've never spoken much to Doctor Kim besides what was needed or the routine good morning sir and the short morning he would answer with. 

So it was strange that on the first day of your career as a real surgeon, after your hands and those of Doctor Kim near each other worked, barely moving, his muffled voice ordering the tools, your muffled voice doing the same, you hugged him. 

You hugged him that day for no reason besides the overwhelming feeling of being alive. 

Doctor Kim, after every surgery, good or bad, would always walk out on the terrace. 

You followed him that night and stopped behind his frame. You had to talk to someone about what just happened and he was the only one who might understand. 

He was facing the city lights and the wind breeze ruffled his hair. He didn’t care to push it off his forehead. 

"You did well today," he said quietly without looking at you. 

Oh, you blinked fast. 

Your first surgery was a success but your heart was beating so fast that you couldn't understand your feelings. 

Were you happy? Were you about to cry? Did you want to scream and jump? What did you want? 

But Doyoung just complimented you. 

So again, you let your body work automatically and you looked at yourself, as if going through depersonalization, timid feet filling the space between you and Doctor Kim, your hands touching his waist and going around it until meeting each other on his stomach. You placed your head on his shoulders and closed your eyes. 

"I was so scared," you whispered. 

Doctor Kim's body was stiff, no reaction from his posture, no words coming from his mouth. 

Was he shocked? Was he wondering what the hell were you doing? Was he about to tell you to get your shit together again like that first time three years prior? 

But he didn’t do any of these things. 

He sighed once and you imagined him closing his eyes and enjoying the warmth of your body. 

Even if for a moment. Even if it was all in your head and he actually hated it. 

Then he took a step forward and you had to let him go. 

And when he turned around and placed one palm on your shoulder without looking at you in the face, you remained alone on the terrace, breathing the cold air deeply and longing for his hands to hold you a little longer.

__________

Doyoung didn't speak to you again after that night. 

Nor did he look at you once. 

While you found yourself staring at his nape every time he walked around. Or turning your head as if following the trail he left behind. 

You couldn’t wear perfume in the hospital but it was as if Doyoung did because he’d pull your senses towards him by something invisible. 

As if that first touch you shared connected you to him in obscure ways. 

“Here’s the coffee that you asked for, sir.” You entered his office after his dry “come in”.

His expression was priceless and for a moment you felt the urge to look behind you and see if there were a ghost scaring him.

“What are you doing?” he asked. 

“Bringing you the coffee?” 

“I asked a student to do it, not you. You’re a surgeon.” 

Your lips were dangerously trying to form a smile while you placed the coffee on his desk. 

“Why does it matter? I am free while those students are busy learning how to be doctors.” 

“You think that just because you hugged me once when you were emotionally unstable, now we’re friends?” 

That question was so sudden and cold to make you snap your head upwards. 

His eyes were darker than usual and you almost gulped. 

“No, sir.” 

Your voice came out as a tiny exhale and if he felt sorry for his sudden and out of place tone, you couldn't see it on his face at all. 

"I was just being friendly as all colleagues would," you added a new note to your own tone, trying to perhaps make him feel guilty. 

"You can give me up."

His reply shut you up and you furrowed your eyebrows. “What?”

"I'm saying," he spoke slowly, "that I don't want to be friendly with you. Now, please leave."

________

"I'm going to fucking kill him!" you threw your head back to drink your espresso shot as if it was alcohol and slammed the paper cup back on the counter. 

Jaemin sighed pouring sugar into his coffee. 

"Why did you even try? He's a jerk." 

The man sipped on his drink slowly, the warmth of it misting his glasses. 

“I just-” you huffed, crossing your arms on your chest. “We’re colleagues. It made sense for him to be a piece of shit with us when we were interns but now? ‘I don’t want to be friendly with you’” you mocked his deep voice. “Who the fuck does he think he is? I swear I’ll accidentally stab him with a knife!”

“Hm. Do you like him?” Jaemin asked with an unimpressed tone. 

You almost grabbed the coffee from Jaemin’s hands and threw it in his face. 

“Are you insane? What does that mean? Why would I like him? Kim Doyoung? Me-” you pressed your index on your chest, “liking that asshole? I hate his guts! I can’t believe you said something like this! What’s to like about him?”

Jaemin felt his fringe move around his forehead at your intense voice as if it were wind. 

“No need to get so worked up about it. You’re just talking so often about him lately. Also, he’s objectively good looking. He’s also smart. I understand.” 

“He’s the ugliest man I’ve ever laid my eyes on! And he’s an idiot! And I don’t talk about him! I have no idea what you’re all about.” 

Jaemin rolled his eyes and finished the drink. 

“Talking of ugly. What’s that shirt you’re wearing?” you asked. 

The man’s head snapped down to look at it. “What’s wrong with it?” 

You chuckled once. “Where did you buy it?” 

“It’s a normal Polo.” 

You laughed even harder. “A Polo you say? And what’s that? A knock off Holo?”  

“What’s Holo?” 

Jaemin’s face was genuinely confused and it amused you even more. 

“Are you getting enough sleep? You’ve been acting weird lately.” 

“Or,” he relaxed his expression, lifting one index up, “I come from an alternate universe.” 

You chuckled once and hit his shoulder lightly as a greeting, liking his new joking side. “See you later then, alternate universe Jaemin.”

__________

Doyoung wanted to hit his head on the desk. 

Your expression, hurt and shocked because of his stupid remarks made his heart tingle in a very uncomfortable way. 

One thing was being severe and one thing was being rude for no reason at all. 

But the thing is that you were everywhere and he hated it. 

Doyoung hated that you were trying to get under his skin. 

Like a scent. Like some kind of drug. 

He’d scrub his hands and forearms even harder before going inside the surgery room as if with the water and soap he could get rid of the feeling of your arms around his torso under the rain too. 

What were you even thinking? Asking for reassurance? From him? Reassurance from the most hated man in the whole hospital? What did you even expect? Why would you even try? 

What a reckless person. 

He noticed it the first time he saw you as well. 

Eyes wide with curiosity and surprise, looking around the ER like it was the best place in the world. Doyoung hated your happiness but he also hated the fact that he would have to assist that light slowly die out with time. 

Or at least he thought that would happen. 

Days after days, months after months, he paid attention like a scientist looking at his object of study, taking mental notes and registering results. Doyoung would jolt with secret joy when his theories would reveal themselves to be true but then, like a rollercoaster, he’d feel weighed down with grief seeing you in the same state as his one. 

Until he didn’t know what to desire to see anymore. 

Until one day he lifted his eyes, head full of a soliloquy towards you. “How are you today? Tell me you got better. Tell me you still have your light because no one needs too many black holes in here.” 

Until he realized that he couldn’t remember anything about his life before you. 

And when you hugged him that day, he felt proud. For your success and your light. 

You were a star and he bathed into that warmth for a little before remembering he was still a black hole and black holes attract stars until engulfing them whole with no turning back.

_________

“Why are you always around?” he blinked annoyed. 

You straightened your gown that shifted after bumping into him and sighed loudly. 

“In case you forgot, I work here.” 

Doyoung sighed. 

“This is the farthest yard from where you’re always playing with your friends.” 

“I had business coming here.” 

“What business?” 

“That’s my business.” 

Doyoung’s corner of the mouth twitched. 

“It’s our business.” 

“Are you a communist?” you placed your hands on your hips, tilting your head to the side. 

“I’m your superior. What are you doing here?” 

A few nurses whispered passing you by and you cleared your throat, trying to relax your face muscles. Doyoung rolled his eyes once upon seeing your new fake cordial expression. 

“Apparently I’m doing such a good job that Mr Jung wanted to compliment me,” you raised your chin. 

“Mr Jung?”

“Yes.” 

His nostrils widened as if he had too much air to inhale and didn’t have time to get it little by little. 

“He doesn’t just summon people to compliment them. Stay away from him.” 

You scoffed incredulously at his innuendo. 

“Are you hearing yourself?” 

“Very well. Get back to work now.” 

“Are you perhaps jealous?” the words slipped from your mouth before you could stop yourself. 

But Doyoung, to your biggest surprise, smirked a little, lifting his eyebrows once. 

“And if I were?” he asked, then walked around you, leaving you still for long moments in the corner of the corridor before being able to walk again.

_________

“And then he said, “and if I were?”

Jaemin gulped his food and chuckled. “I can’t imagine that.” 

“I know right? Was he crazy?” you asked with your mouth full, swinging your knife. 

“Maybe the director does have eyes on you. And-” he leaned in mischievously, avoiding your cutlery, “that’s why he acts as if he hates you. Because he has feelings for you.” 

You chuckled nervously. 

“He hates you too!” 

“He doesn’t even know I exist,” Jaemin shrugged. 

“Hey, Jaemin.” 

“Like once I asked him something and he thought I was a patient and when I said that I’m actually-” 

“Jaemin! I’m pretty sure I’ve just seen someone looking like you pass that door just now.” 

The young man turned around quickly, right in time to see himself exit the food hall. 

“Damn,” he laughed for a few moments. “Someone else copied my hairstyle. I guess I’m not that unnoticeable as I thought.” 

You opened your mouth to comment on that since you were pretty sure it wasn’t only the hairstyle that the man copied when Doyoung approached your table like a storm scaring the shit out of you. 

“What is it now?” he asked, eyes piercing through you. 

You let out a long “uhhh” before talking, staring him up and down. 

“Are you talking to me?” 

Doyoung scoffed then sighed. “A doctor told me you were urgently looking for me.” 

You furrowed your eyebrows. “Who?” 

“Do I look like someone who knows people’s names?”

Jaemin shook his head. 

“Well, I don’t need you,” you let him know. 

Doyoung sighed again and the long look you exchanged made Jaemin awkwardly chuckle once. 

“You can sit down with us for lunch, sir,” he offered and you inhaled sharply, kicking his leg under the table. 

Doyoung looked firstly at you then at Jaemin then at you again as if not believing he was actually talking to people like you. 

But the tray in his hands was getting heavy and there were no other empty tables. 

He walked around Jaemin and sat down near him. 

Then he rolled his sleeves and started to eat in silence. 

But only for a moment. 

“What?” he asked as you were both staring at him with hanging open mouths. 

“It’s our first time seeing you eat,” you whispered. 

Doyoung gulped the food. “I’m putting on a show for you guys. I’m a vampire that doesn’t need food.” 

“See!” you hit Jaemin’s hand as if catching his attention. “He’s making jokes!” 

Jaemin leaned back in his chair as if a little afraid. 

“So you talk about me instead of working,” Doyoung commented. 

His eyes were on you and you suddenly realized what you’ve just said. 

“No,” you quickly grabbed your glass and sipped the water. 

Doyoung looked at Jaemin and the young man secretly nodded a little. 

And for the first time in years, you saw Doyoung smile. 

Like a full-on smile. A big open smile with all the teeth out. 

You blinked fast and before realizing your own lips were stretched in a smile too.  

He was breathtaking. 

You wanted to run away but also crash into him. You were at the top of the world and down in the dumps.

__________

The grunt you let out after hitting a hard surface resonated in the whole hallway. 

For the second time. 

"You are always where you shouldn't be."

You lifted your pained eyes while massaging your shoulder just to see Doyoung do the same. 

"Where am I and where am I supposed to be then?" you asked. 

"Around me and you should be far away from me." 

"And if I say that I'm doing it on purpose?" 

Doyoung's pupils trembled. 

"To make you mad," you explained, the little smile creeping on your lips making him tighten his. 

“You’re trying to make me mad?” 

In your head, all of the conversations you would have with Doyoung sounded fun and risky in a good way. 

In reality, you realized, it was so overwhelming that you felt your limbs shake. 

“I’m joking, sir.” His intense eyes made you look over the windows. 

“You don’t like to look at me in the eyes?” his voice was mellifluous just as his movements, getting slowly closer to you. 

“Your eyes make me uneasy,” you replied honestly. 

Doyoung tilted his head to the side, curious, inviting you to say more. You looked at him again. 

“As if they don’t know fear,” your voice was tiny. 

A little smile curved the man’s lips. “Oh, but they know what fear is.”

“And what is that?” 

“What you’re feeling right now.” 

"I am not afraid," you whispered. 

"Then why are you stepping back?" 

“I am not stepping back.”

Yet the air got softly knocked out of your lungs as you felt the wall on your shoulder blades. 

Doyoung didn't reply and just got as close as to lightly brush your lower lip with his knuckle. 

"You're cute when you pout," he whispered, eyes smiley under the strands fallen from his styled fringe. 

You opened your mouth to talk but he walked away, leaving you alone and with an abnormally beating heart. 

Again.

__________

If Doyoung’s newly humorous side was something interesting to share with Jaemin, his newly flirtatious side was something you felt the need to keep a secret. 

Heated up, you walked the corridors like a storm. 

Kim Doyoung? 

Did your body really react that way towards Kim Doyoung? 

Pulse throbbing in places you didn’t want to think of? 

Because of Kim Doyoung? 

Face buried in your wet hands, the cold water running in the sink, you imagined telling this to your younger self. 

Then you lifted your head and turned it off, raising your gaze to look at your dilated pupils in the bathroom mirror.

_________

Doyoung didn’t care about people much. 

Hours upon hours of surgery, he only needed to see his colleagues’ hands and hear their breaths while desperately trying to save yet another life. How they looked without the caps and masks was not something of interest to him, especially knowing superfluous details like their names. 

Yet, when he briefly noticed the eyes of the second surgeon entering the room, Doyoung furrowed his eyebrows. 

Those were not your eyes and those were definitely not your hands in the latex gloves. 

And for the first time, he needed to know who that person was.

“I’m Lee,” the man whispered. 

“I didn’t know you were on schedule today.” 

“Yeah, heard about it last minute as well.”

Were you avoiding him? 

If Doyoung’s body could show tremor, he’d had trembling legs under the desk he sat at after the surgery, and if he’d had the habit to bite his nails, he’d be ferociously eating them by now.

Unfortunately, he was stoically sitting in his office, elbows pressed into the hard iron surface, veins missing adrenaline but aggravated eyes. 

Walking the corridors while people took a step back to make him pass, looking away when he’d look at them and whispering angrily behind his back, was a bliss. 

The protection shielded Doyoung like a fuzzy blanket even if it sometimes felt itchy at night when he found himself the most lonely. 

So when you did the same, passing him by as if hating him, he surprised himself at the sudden discomfort. Especially after

well,

after that. 

He wasn’t sure himself what it was but it must have been something if it made you uncomfortable enough to not show up to a surgery. 

He lifted the corner of his blanket for a moment and he fucked up. 

__________

“Y/N.” 

You stopped in place. 

And so did most people around you. 

Many found Doyoung scary but also interesting to observe when his spite wasn’t directed at them. 

What did she do? you could almost hear the whispery words passing from ear to ear, amused voices, grateful for not being in your place. 

“See me in my office,” Doyoung ordered after you slowly turned around. 

His voice was low and no one could have heard it if the whole yard didn’t just collectively hold its breath. 

“Yes, sir.” 

“You all are surely not working enough if you have time to be useless,” his voice sounded louder and clean all of a sudden. “Do you want some hours assigned?”  

Like a spell, everyone looked around and the buzz filled your ears back, leaving yourself and Doyoung the only still figures. 

Then he moved as well, the swoosh of his cloak touching your hand when he passed near you. 

You inhaled deeply and followed him.

_________

“I am sorry.” 

You wished you’d  accepted his offer to sit down because that single sentence floored you. 

“For what?” you asked with a tiny voice. 

“I know I often say things that I don’t mean. And I know that I might have made you feel uncomfortable. So I apologize.” 

His eyes were round and filled to the brim with such sincerity to make you swallow hard. 

“You don’t have to apologize. It was necessary to make me who I am,” you minimized. 

Doyoung looked away for a brief moment. “I mean the corridor incident.” 

You blinked at him. 

“I made a mistake,” he added. 

The first thing that came to mind was the urge to use that to your advantage. 

Scold him. Make him feel guilty. 

Kim Doyoung making a mistake. 

Exhilarating. 

The power suddenly surging in your veins went to your head so you suppressed the smile that so desperately wanted to bloom on your lips. 

“Yes.” 

His expression darkened even more at your reply and his adam apple moved as he swallowed. He actually hoped it wasn’t the case. 

“I’ll make sure to keep the surgery schedules separated so you won’t feel uncomfortable working with me. You could have asked me first though before changing it yourself.” 

The excitement died out with these words. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“Thursday’s surgery.” 

“I was told you appointed another person yourself.” 

“I did not.” 

“Well, I didn’t either.” 

“So-” 

“It’s not like I’m trying to avoid you, no. But if you-” 

“I’m not trying to avoid you either. But you said I made you uncomfortable, so-” 

“I was messing with you.” 

He finally went silent. 

“You looked so guilty that I wanted to get a little revenge,” your voice came out a timid whisper. 

Doyoung sighed, closing his eyes a little, then he stood up. 

“Did I seriously cause you that much pain all of this time?” he walked towards you as if actually concerned. 

“You made me cry almost every day.” 

He opened his mouth like a fish before closing it. The shocking confession made him lift one hand to cup your face. 

You both looked at it with fluttering eyes as if it wasn’t his. 

He tried to put it away quickly but you pressed your palm on it to keep it in place.  

“I’m joking. I only cried a few times.” 

Doyoung’s pupils danced around just like his brain trying to process the information you were giving him. His face, confused and not knowing anymore what was a joke and what wasn’t, amused you a lot. 

“I’m sorry I’ve been harsh. I’ve been-”

“A jerk.” 

He gulped, his thumb slowly brushing your cheekbone. 

That little gesture made you close your eyes for a moment. And when you opened them, you just leaned in and placed a quick and chaste kiss on his closed lips. 

“If the corridor thing was a mistake for you, I just did one too. Don’t be too hard on yourself. We can pretend nothing of this happened."

You let his hand go and moved to take a step back just to feel his hold on your face tighten. 

Pulling you towards him again, he added the second hand. 

His lips were not closed anymore, but very much open to welcome your lower lip between them. 

Your hands flew to his hair and pulled him towards you too. He hummed and you whined. And when you both needed air, you let yourselves go, panting against each other’s lips. 

A little smile curved your lips, eyes unable to look up. Fingers on his neck, you let them slowly descend to his chest and you took a step back. 

You took your lower lip inside your mouth for a moment, as if still trying to taste him and walked a few steps back. 

Doyoung followed you, unable to let your body go until you touched the door. His eyes were blown out and he kissed the corner of your mouth again, and again, and again, until kissing you fully on the lips for the second time. Hands on the glass behind your head, you heard his nails grating at it slowly as you let your tongue twirl with his. Then you breathed out and he couldn’t do anything else than just moving his arms away for you to slowly open the door and leave in silence. 

After the door closed, Doyoung pressed his forehead on the cold window. 

“Fuck,” he whispered to himself, the fuzzy blanket he carefully wrapped himself with all of those years slowly slipping away to his feet.

__________

It didn't surprise you to see Doyoung pretend nothing happened between you as you passed each other in the corridors. 

But his avoidance felt weirder than usual, even to external eyes, as if something happened indeed and he tried so hard to conceal it. 

"Perhaps it's the 5th coffee talking right now, but doesn't Doyoung look weird?"

Jaemin asked lazily as he rested his body on one elbow placed on the little resting room counter. Said man passed in front of the open door and the furtive look he took of you was interesting enough for someone bored like Jaemin to notice. 

You shrugged, quickly stirring the sugar in your own coffee. 

"Hm?" your friend smiled at your silence, getting closer. 

You sipped the drink. 

"Hmmm?" Jaemin put his face into yours. 

"Oh my God, get away," you tried to push him away. 

"You had sex."

You spat the little coffee you still had on your mouth. Jaemin giggled and took a step back before it could land on his own. 

"We did not have sex! What's wrong with you?" 

"Okay. So you at least kissed," he looked up to you under his wiggly eyebrows as he handed you a few napkins. 

"We-," you wanted to deny but your lips formed a frustrated smile instead. "Shit. I can't believe it either." 

"Wow."

"He was- so delicate," you murmured. 

Jaemin winced amused. 

"But also intense you know? Like it felt-" 

"Okay wait. I didn't ask for a full-on description," he made a puking expression at you. 

You lightly hit his arm. 

"I was just so surprised. I've never seen this side of him."

"Him liking people?" Jaemin giggled. “Yeah. That’s weird.”

__________

"So it's done. We're done. Let’s get the fuck out of here. Seeing myself around is creeping me out."

Haechan sighed, rolling around in his chair. "Not so quickly. They only kissed."

Jaemin furrowed his eyebrows. 

"They have to confess," Jeno explained with a sleepy voice, sprawled on his own chair. 

"But they love each other."

"They have to say the words."

Jaemin put his hands on the hips. "That's so stupid." 

“Tell this to Doyoung. This is what he wrote in the contract,” Haechan mumbled amused, patting his chest where the Book was snuggly packed near his heart. 

Jaemin grabbed another chair and sat backwards on it, resting his chin on the folded arms. 

“So you know the job is done when they confess? What if they break up afterwards?”

“It has never happened before.” 

“And what if it does happen?” 

Jeno opened one eye. “Don’t manifest doom.” 

“I’d probably have to come back and get them together again,” Haechan replied. 

“I still don’t know why you’re doing this. Can’t you just recede from that contract?” 

Haechan sat up properly and grabbed his water bottle. “And do what? Go back to the pits of hell?” 

His eyes twinkled with mischief. 

“I’ve never had this much fun in a very long time.”

__________

He brought it upon himself, he could admit that. 

Ignoring you was more difficult than he anticipated and the first reaction he managed to put out when you talked back to him in front of all of the other surgeons was his usual skin cutting one. 

You didn’t like it, he could see it. 

You’ve never liked it and, honestly, Doyoung could not think of a single person that enjoyed being on the other side of his table. 

Perhaps you were getting a little comfortable with him though because you leaned back in your chair and smiled. As if for once he couldn’t get to you. 

It made him even more eager to scratch that nonchalance. 

So he did. 

Until the meeting was over and he got back to his office with a weird sensation on his shoulders. It somehow tasted like defeat. 

And when you opened his door with a loud bang and got in, he inhaled and took a few steps back, imitating the steps you took forward. 

You pushed him down on the chair, your gazes mixed together just like your breaths as you leaned down. 

Only the sheer anticipation of you touching him made him lose his mind a little. 

One hand on his thigh and the other going down from his lips to his extended neck and chest, dragging your nail on his shirt until reaching his stomach and belt. 

Then you hit one of his feet to the side with yours, making him open his legs even wider. 

He jolted and you could visibly see the way his breath stopped for a moment. 

"I don't think someone else tried to put you in your place before."

Your voice was dark and his eyelids fluttered before his pupils could fall on the way your palm brushed his crotch. It twitched under his dress pants and he inhaled deeply. 

"Unfortunately, it has to be me." 

"We're at work-," he tried to speak but the words died in his throat as you cupped his balls. 

"Sorry? Didn't hear that." 

"Shit Y/N-," Doyoung closed his eyes, jaw muscles tightening as you gently massaged him. 

"Hmm, Doctor Kim is at a loss of words?" 

You cooed, leaning down even more until almost brushing his lips with yours. 

"So cold and composed while you spit venom all day. I really want to see you lose your mind for once."

He opened his eyes right when he started to pant lightly and you gulped upon seeing his dark gaze. 

"You'll regret this."

"Can't wait to feel regretful."

"Be careful."

"Don't want to." 

His smile grew suddenly wicked and it threw you off as he suddenly stood up, grabbing your wrists and pushing you gently backwards. 

"You’ve been loving fighting with me lately. I think that you just need to get laid."

You smiled. "Do you want to help me with that?" 

Doyoung scoffed once. "I can't stand you."

"Then sit down."

He put his tongue inside the cheek, staring at your raised chin. 

Then his hands suddenly crept around you and grabbed your ass. They squeezed, pulling your hips towards his, making you pant and palm his chest in the meantime. Body pressing on his and his low voice buzzing into your ear made you light headed. 

"Arguing with you turns me on so fucking much." 

You gulped and noticed the way Doyoung’s eyes fell on your open mouth. 

“This is a very pretty shade of lipstick. Makes me want to ruin it.”

His thumb opened up your shocked lips even more by tugging at the lower one, your eyes getting hazy from his expression cutting you in half.

“Suck.” 

The order made your legs buckle a little. Your pupils trembled when you slowly let your tongue touch his fingertip. Doyoung got impatient and pushed it until it was all in. You fought the urge to gag and just whimpered, grabbing his shirt into your fists as he watched you hollow your cheeks on it. 

“I’ve always wanted to make a mess out of you,” he murmured, his other hand cupping your face and feeling your jaw, going down to your neck and wrapping it into its warmth. You raised your face to give him more space and your hooded eyes trying to look at him as he pressed around your throat made him smirk. 

“You like that?” he watched your squirming body trying to get closer to him. He took a step back and rested his hips on his desk, pulling at you until you felt his thigh between your legs. 

“What a slut,” he took out his thumb and spread the saliva on it on your lips. “Bet you wanted to suck me off under the desk, didn’t you? Fuck your superior?” 

You started to breathe through your mouth, the hand wrapped around your throat making it difficult for you to form any thoughts. 

“Or you wanted me to bend you over it?” he murmured, eyes glazing over your breast, his free hand painting one line from your collarbones to the cleavage of it. And when he suddenly squeezed one, feeling its softness in his palm, you almost cried out and dug your fingers into his shoulders. 

“Yes, sir.” 

Doyoung’s corner of the lips lifted as if curiously surprised. 

“And if I don’t do any of those things?” his eyes were on your face now and it made you want to hide away or just beg him to just please do all of those things.

“What are you going to do?” he asked again. 

The pool of wetness inside your panties was so embarrassing that you pressed your forehead on his shoulder. 

"Then just let me go," you whispered in a tiny voice. 

"You're free to g-" he caressed your jaw with one thumb. 

"No. I hate it," you went on, lifting your gaze on him, and he exchanged the look, slightly taken aback. 

"I dream about you every night. It's not about sex, it has never been just about it. Everything about you makes me go crazy. I hate it and I want you to just let me go.” 

Doyoung blinked and cupped your face with both hands. 

You just breathed out, ignoring the little voice screaming inside your mind to shut up, palming the back of his hands with yours, suddenly unable to raise your eyes on him. 

"I just can't understand and I hate being like this," you added after a quick gulp. 

The man opened his lips and you noticed the way you started to breathe in unison. 

"There's something so darkly attractive about you," the tiny sigh coming out of your lips made their way on Doyoung ones and he licked them once, his own breath warm on your skin. 

"No matter how much I try to know you, there's something that escapes me. I can't pinpoint you and it keeps me up at night." 

Doyoung gulped and his hands twitched as they palmed your arms, going down to your hips and pushing you down, gently. 

You gasped silently, your core so swollen that the feeling of the friction of your bodies as you rubbed on him could have been enough to make you orgasm. 

"Sir-," you found the force to talk but he took his tongue out and you just dove in, catching it inside your mouth and sucking on it the way you sucked on his finger. Your eagerness made his hold even tighter, guiding your body rolls, loving the way you squirmed in his arms. 

When you pulled away to whine he raised one hand to bury in your hair. 

"You haunt me too," he confessed. "Sometimes I feel so pulled towards you to make me question everything I know about myself."

Your eyes fluttered and your exposed throat looked so vulnerable in Doyoung's eyes to make him lean in and bite on it. 

The little moans escaping your lips caressed his ears and when he licked the spots you shivered, your hips not stopping for a second. 

It was intoxicating and you didn't dare to speak again but your thoughts were seeping through all of your pores. 

"I want you to tell me what you want me to do," you whispered, words broken.  

"Don't cum," Doyoung ordered and it snapped something in you. 

Your breath grew irregular and he chuckled. 

With a little groan, you forced your hips to still but he looked down and clicked his tongue, pushing his thigh upwards and making you bounce on it a few times.  

"Don't stop."

"But you said-" 

"Don't cum and don't stop." 

"I can't last," you mewled, twitching against his body and he pouted. 

"Baby girl can't keep that in?" 

You shook your head, feeling all dizzy as his hands squeezed your asscheeks, making you rub against his leg again. 

"But I said what I said. Are you going to be a bad girl?" he accompanied his last word with a harsh slap on your ass that made you inhale through your teeth. 

"Sir- I am begging you." 

His hand dropped under your skirt that moved to your thighs in a single movement, the coldness of it on your hot clit making you cry out. 

He hummed amused, slowly pressing into you and circling your sensitive bud until your legs started to twitch. 

"If you want to cum," he stopped, "you'll have to do whatever I say. Is this an agreement?" 

You nodded quickly, so close to orgasm that you started to ride his fingers by yourself. 

He retrieved his hand and pressed it on your stomach, making you step back until you barely could keep your balance. 

"You know where I live, right?" 

You nodded confused. 

"See you later then," he smirked and gestured to leave the office. 

You inhaled deeply, the arousal so high that you considered just finger fucking yourself in front of him. 

"Cruel," you whispered. 

"And you love it," was his amused reply.

__________

Timid feet in front of Doyoung's entrance door, you questioned if you actually lost your mind. 

Were you really willing to go this far for a single orgasm? 

Or multiple, you considered. 

Okay. Well, perhaps it was all worth it in the end. 

Your eyes darted upwards to take in the view of his house. 

The windows were lit on the first floor and it looked like a place you'd love to spend your life in. It was too huge for a single person anyway. 

When he opened the door after the ring announcing your arrival you didn't expect to see him in casual clothing. It looked so off that for a moment you couldn't speak, eyeing his feet in warm socks instead of rubber shoes. 

Then you hit yourself in your mind. Of course, he won't wear his doctor gown at home. 

"Good evening," you finally smiled and he eyed your body with a relaxed gaze, stopping when noticing the bottle of wine you carried in your hands. 

“Good evening,” he gestured to you to come in and you walked the distance from the doorstep to the hallway. His hands draped your shoulders and you sighed when he took your wet coat away. 

You put in a lot of effort in your appearance, choosing the right clothing and accessories. 

And he put a lot of effort into arranging his house for you, lighting up the right candles, you noticed after he indicated a room to the left. 

Yet all you wanted to see was him. 

And all he wanted was to see was you naked. 

Venturing in slowly, you turned around looking at what you figured out was the living room. With the corner of your eyes, you saw the grey of Doyoung’s sweatpants disappear upstairs and it suddenly got silent, safe for the crackle coming from the chimney and the hard rain hitting the windows. You took off your shoes and cautiously walked on the dark wine-coloured rug, close enough to warm yourself. A black glassy mirror was hung on the wall in front of you showcasing the pitiful state you were in because of the storm. Then you looked at the piles of books scattered around your feet placed down in a chaotic path leading to the velvet couches behind you as if someone read them while circling the room and suddenly let them fall on the ground when bored. You followed the spines with your gaze trying to figure out the language they were written in when two feet made their appearance in your peripheral vision, making you snap your head up. 

He approached you with a little smile, getting closer and closer like a black cat. 

New thick energy made it difficult for you to breathe too deeply so you resorted to short inhales and exhales especially after he stopped so close to you. 

Doyoung's hands wrapped yours as he took the wine away and placed it on the coffee table on his left. Then he sighed and you found yourself shivering under his gaze. 

"Take this off," he lightly felt your shirt's material with his fingertips.  

What? You inhaled, mind buzzing at how easy it was this time. No dinner and fancy courtship? 

He did look like someone that'd rather take you into seclusion and have you for himself as quickly as possible though. 

With slightly trembling fingers that you'd never get in the surgery room, you started to unbutton your top. Doyoung tilted his head to the side with a little smirk as if enjoying the show. 

And when you actually found yourself with only your bra on he smiled, even more, eyes grazing your skin slowly until you felt a heatwave shake your limbs. 

“This too.” 

He slowly touched the bra fabric and you gulped. 

“Take it off yourself.” 

Doyoung chuckled once and went around your torso, unclasping it with quick and expert fingers. 

You jolted and you felt your eyelids flutter as it slowly fell down your arms. 

Doyoung grabbed the front part of it and dragged it down to the floor, adding it to the weird maze of books making the eccentric design of his living room. 

His eyes caressed your perked nipples and you tried hard to resist the urge to cover yourself. 

“Pants,” he ordered and his voice was deeper than usual. 

You wavered a moment and he lifted his eyebrows once. Do it. 

You inhaled and slowly opened the zip. 

He bit his lower lip when you bent down to discard the piece of clothing and when you straightened your back he hummed. 

“Wear this,” he gently threw a piece of fabric towards you which you caught quickly. It was soft and it smelled like him. 

He looked at it, then slowly raised his eyes to meet yours, not moving a single muscle. 

You inhaled in again, trying to calm your nerves, desperately wanting to ignore the way he was dressed himself. A white and see-through shirt with the deepest neck you’ve ever seen, barely covering any of his chest. You barely could see his sweatpants as well, but his bare ankles were fully on display, just like his forearms that you could catch glimpses of as he absentmindedly revived the locks blocking his pupils with one hand. 

A raw playfulness made his features even scarier in the dim lighting. 

“I want you wet. But not from the rain,” he explained, eyeing your confusion. 

“You could have just told me to change into it and end it there,” you mumbled, buttoning the shirt up. It was deep blue and oversized, short on your thighs but hiding whatever you had to hide. 

“Why? Did you hate that I made you undress in front of me?” 

“It was embarrassing to stand naked like that.” 

You wanted to sound offended but the pout your lips formed on its own betrayed your secret amusement. 

“Nothing that I won’t see up close soon.” 

His voice was a whisper that forced you to look away. You wanted to reply but he turned around walking towards the kitchen. 

"Besides, I made some spicy sauce. You don't want to spill it on your nice clothes."

“Who said I was going to spill food on myself? I have steady hands.” 

You walked over him, taking the plates from his hold and placing them down on the dining table yourself. 

You wanted to look unbothered by him just like he looked unbothered by you, but the truth was that you just had to do something to not feel that overwhelmed. 

“You don’t,” he argued following you near the table. 

You scoffed lifting your head to look at him. “Excuse you? I’m a surgeon.” 

“Your hands don’t look like the hands of a surgeon when you’re around me.” 

You scoffed. 

“I think that the biggest thing in the world is your ego.”

“You haven't seen my-”

“Don’t say it.” 

He closed his mouth as the little smile he had on kept lingering on his lips. 

Domestic and flirty. It was getting to your head and you hadn’t had the opportunity to sip a single drop of alcohol yet. 

As if reading your mind, he grabbed the bottle of wine you brought and fumbled slowly with the cap. 

"That's my favourite shirt. And I want to fuck you in it." 

The shivers that travelled down your spine almost made your body twitch and your hands stopped in mid-air as you were placing the cutlery. 

He smiled at you when you looked at his expression. 

His lips. His eyes and cheekbones. His skin under the lights. 

Fuck. You really needed a drink. 

And after he popped the bottle open with a loud sound that disrupted the silence, the red wine erupted out of it, dripping off his hand up to the wrist you had your drink right off his fingers. 

Doyoung’s pupils trembled as you leaned in like a cat and his lips opened to breathe better seeing you lick the drops off his fingertips. Rested with his hips on the table, it creaked when you came forward, even more, hands pressed on his open thighs and reaching for his face. You finally caught his lips in yours and you let him taste the wine on your tongue. 

It was rich and slightly sour, then it became sweet as only Doyoung’s taste remained lingering on his lips. 

“Delicious,” he commented after the slow kiss. “You have good taste in wine.” 

“And men.” 

His expression was hidden under his long fringe but you could sense that he was smirking. 

Then he raised his head a bit and had a gulp out of the bottle himself. 

You had the first row to the show that his adam apple moving up and down gave you. Then your eyes naturally fell to his collarbones and bare chest, his white shirt barely covering anything. 

Your fingers gently darted to his skin and you palmed it, then to his prominent collar bones, feeling the warmth of his chain around his neck.

He hummed, letting his head down to catch your hand with his lips. They kissed your fingertips then he finally dove in and let you taste his tongue again, hands quick to let the bottle go and grab your body instead.

Closer closer closer you needed him more and more. 

“I need to feed you dinner first,” he grabbed your wrists as your hands tried to unbutton his shirt. 

“If you won’t fuck me, I can find someone else to do it,” you whispered. 

His eyes tightened and he exhaled once. 

The movement was so quick that your head spun and the spank that arrived at your ass made you jolt on your toes before you could lean down on the table, fingers trying to grip the tablecloth. 

“Yeah? I want to see you get fucked by someone else while my name spills out of your filthy mouth.” 

His voice was raspy and it made you bite your lower lip, ass eager to push back and to rub against Doyoung's crotch. He hummed at your movements and lifted the shirt up to your waist, palming your skin and looking down at the way your ass cheeks engulfed your pretty lingerie. You strained your neck upwards at the feeling of his fingers slowly caressing your lower back, feeling the lace of your panties, then you whimpered as he grabbed the material and stretched it towards him before letting it go. 

"You want this little hole all filled up, don't you?" he murmured, hand sliding between your thighs to rub on the soft and thin fabric. Your legs shifted in place at the sensation and you arched your back for more. The little 'Doyoung' making him exhale. 

"And I thought you'd keep calling me sir." 

You tried to turn your head towards him, wondering if his suddenly absent hand meant that he wanted you to actually call him that. 

But then you saw that hand around you, reaching for the bucket of ice prepared for the wine on the table in front of you. And at that moment you realized that it was for you instead - his drink for the night. 

The ice cube wetted his fingers when he took it out and he first placed it on your open lips. You sucked on it for a moment, the warmth of your skin already melting it, strands of water slowly descending on your chin and inside your cleavage. 

"Say 'blue' and I'll stop," his voice was deep near your ear. 

You nodded breathlessly and you shivered feeling his hand hover over your back. 

And when you first felt it on your spine, your fingers independently grabbed the edge of the table. Then it went down and down, forcing goosebumps out of you. 

Doyoung’s palm soothed your skin, warming it up before reaching to the front to grab at your hard nipples poking through the fabric. And when the cube reached your clothed core you mewled, lifting yourself on the tiptoes. 

“Shit-shit-,” you curled your neck down, jolting under his touch, wanting more of it and running away at the same time. 

Your panties were all wet and you were unsure if for the ice or your own body and when Doyoung took away the cube, giving you a break by gently pressing his own wet fingers between your lips you wished for the fabric to not be there anymore. 

“More?” you whined, chest rising and falling at a crazy speed. 

Doyoung snickered once, his hands grabbing your sides and turning you around.

Mind hazy, you didn’t have the time to wonder where the ice cube went, the only thought roaming your head being the need to pull him closer to you. 

And you did just that, wrapping his waist with your thighs after he lifted you on the table with a thud, making all the cutlery and glasses jingle. 

And you clasped your fingers into his hair while his hands roamed your naked body under his shirt. 

It was when he pressed his cold, open lips on yours that you finally mewled, feeling the ice cube travel from his tongue to yours. 

It got smaller and you sucked on it, giving it back, hearing him hum deeply into the kiss. 

Then he broke it suddenly as if unable to control himself from kissing your neck instead, biting and sucking on your skin as hard as he did on the ice cube. You rolled it on your tongue until it became nothing, finally opening your lips to moan, feeling his cold touch on your breasts as his quick fingers unbuttoned the shirt. 

The material of your panties grazed your legs at Doyoung’s rough pull. You watched them fly and land on the lamp behind him. 

Then you felt his fingers finally rubbing your clit and you inhaled deeply. You were so horny that you were embarrassed to admit that just a few rubs would be able to throw you over the edge. 

Doyoung saw it and from his expression, he was enjoying himself maybe too much. 

“Come on love, cum for me,” he murmured on your open lips. You whined, nail digging into his shoulders and you shook your head. 

“You’ve been begging me for an orgasm and now you want to be a brat about it?” 

His hand worked quicker and when he inserted one of his long and slender fingers inside, you actually moaned loudly. 

“Sir-” the title slipped from your shaking lips and he chuckled against your cheek, pushing another one and curling them both, pressing into you and trying to find the sweetest spots you had. 

“Right here?” he whispered amused. 

You start swearing, moulding his biceps under your tight grip, the table and everything on it shaking at the fast pace of Doyoung’s pumping. 

And then it was too much and it overflowed. 

The gasp you emitted made you fall forwards. Your arms wrapped Doyoung’s body tightly as you came in spasms, legs trying hard to meet each other around his wrist but pressing into his sides instead. 

Doyoung let you whine a little bit more, hand slowing down but never stopping, fucking you through your orgasms as long as he could. Then your jaw got grabbed by his other hand and he lifted your face to meet his gaze. His eyes caressed your fucked up expression before kissing your lips. 

"Good girl. I know you can give me another one."

You gripped his shoulders for dear life as Doyoung's fingers came back outside to desperately rub at your over-sensitive clit. 

“Doyoung-Doyoung-” you writhed in his hold before he could slip away from your arms and fall on his knees. 

You’ve gotten head before, but this time, maybe for the overstimulation or your secret feelings for that man, it felt like the first time ever. 

Not knowing what to grab to steady yourself as his tongue danced in circles around your engorged clit, you buried your hands in his hair. His hands pressed into the softness of your thighs just as hard and when he raised his gaze up to look at you from underneath his messy fringe, you felt like falling. 

And you almost fell when he resorted to quick short licks that drove you insane, making you cum for the second time in such a short time to make you lightheaded. 

The single fuck got prolonged as much as the orgasm Doyoung gave you and when he started to kiss your inner thighs, coming up towards you, on your stomach, pressing his wet open lips on your skin until meeting your breasts, you were ready to admit that you were madly in love with him. 

His kiss felt as if you were underwater, unable to breathe and understand space. You felt his arms around you and suddenly you felt weightless and he carried you around until you felt the velvet of the couches underneath you and his body pressed flushed on yours. His waist got automatically wrapped by your legs again as if that were their place and they weren’t aware of it before. 

He slipped his hands on your hips, grabbing your ass hard as he murmured against your lips. “Are you going to be a brat with me again?” 

His voice was calm but deep as if a storm was incoming, making your knees feel weak. 

“Words,” he spoke again, pressing himself a little more between your legs. 

You breathed out. 

“I don’t know,” you managed to say before pushing him away. He fell to the side, grip softened mostly for the surprise than your strength. 

“Are you going to be a brat to me?” you asked, straddling his lap and pressing your palms on his stomach, going up on his hot skin and lifting his shirt until he couldn’t do anything else than take it off. 

Then his hands found their way on your skin too, unmercifully squeezing your soft breasts. He didn’t care to be gentle and lifting himself up he sucked on your skin so hard until it was almost painful. You wrapped your arms around his torso and threw your head back, stretching out your neck. He left bites all over it, travelling down, tightening his teeth grip around your nipples, making you pant softly. 

“I don’t know,” he finally replied. 

He looked at you from underneath his fringe and you smiled at each other. You caressed his stomach from below his belly button and going up until reaching his collarbones and he leaned back on his elbows to support his weight. He followed your hand going down on him then his eyes shifted their focus to watch how your pelvis started to move back and forth on his sweatpants, right on top of his hard cock. 

“Mm,” he exhaled as finally getting some relief and you imitated him. You placed your hands on his shoulders and closed your eyes and Doyoung flexed his thigh muscles. 

He was enjoying seeing you like that, vulnerable and whiny, needy and horny, while he did nothing to help you with it and leaving you desperate. 

His eyes caressed your whole body, his lips parted slightly at the sight of your breasts bouncing softly, at how you were spreading yourself on him. You felt hot and plump, your thoughts were blurry and foggy. 

"Look at you," he talked. “What a cute little slut.” 

You replied with a whine, locking eyes with him but not being able to do that for a long time as his gaze pierced through you, adding to the sensation his pants gave to your raw clit. 

So you kissed his lips, messily and sloppily, breathing on his mouth and he finally caressed your thighs and ass, pressing you down even more and closer to him. 

Your arms got tighter around his neck and he buried his face into your chest. His hair tickled your chin and you intertwined your fingers into his locks. 

So close to cum, you closed your eyes and just let yourself go, your rhythm lost, your muscles aching, without expecting Doyoung's fingers to suddenly get inside of you. 

You squeezed yourself onto him with a cry. 

"I repeat. Are you going to behave again as you did today?" you heard him ask as his fingers pumped fast into you. 

"No, no, oh fuck, please, no," you managed to answer while gasping for air. 

"I'm going to-" you whimpered about to orgasm and Doyoung at that moment got you off of him, pushing you down on your back and lifting your legs around him, edging you. 

"You're going to cum when I say so," he commented. "You're lucky I'm even giving it to you at all today," he added. 

You bit your lower lip frustrated. 

"Babe, please-" you begged. 

He smiled brightly at the sudden pet name, shushing you as he began to kiss your legs from the knees down, going lightly on the inside of your thigh, making you twitch as he approached your dripping pussy. But he passed over, nudging at it with his nose just to make you jolt and kissed your lower stomach, passing his tongue on the spots he bit before and continued until reaching your lips. 

Then, getting on his knees he finally got rid of his pants and underwear. 

You felt your core pulsing at the sight and breathed heavily. He tugged at your legs, dragging you until the back of your thighs touched his hips and holding himself he nudged at your entrance. You let your arms fall around your head and bit down on your hand as his tip caressed your clit. 

"Doyoung," you whined as your muscles jolted intermittently. You then felt his fingers drag on your leg until grabbing your knee and putting it on his shoulders he humped your folds. 

You let your head fall back into the couch, exposing your neck and making your breasts tighten. 

It was too much. You just wanted him to penetrate you and to make you scream. 

"I want to cum so badly, please," you begged again. 

But he acted as if not being able to hear from you. 

Your muscles twitched in pain and you lifted yourself to meet him. He pushed you down and distanced himself. 

"Behave," he warned. 

You looked at his half-closed eyes and plump lips as he bit it with his teeth. 

He was suffering as well. He couldn't take it anymore, you could tell. 

And when you took your hand to your mouth and licked two fingers, slowly, without breaking eye contact he gasped. 

You were about to suck on them, you wanted to see him going crazy, but you didn't manage to as he penetrated you right at that moment, quick and deep, with a grunt. 

"Fuck," he swore picking up the pace until the wet sounds overwhelmed the storm. 

_________

It was dark. The only light came from the fireplace bathing the living room with a red and yellow hue. 

You were both sprawled on the rug under fuzzy blankets. 

"Come sit on my face. Show me where I belong."

Doyoung’s voice was a low buzz, imitating the storm still going on as it has been the whole night. 

You rolled your eyes to the side amused, ignoring his warm hand palming your knee, nudging you to come closer. 

“You still want to go? I can’t cum again,” you pouted. 

“But I want you to cum,” he pouted as well. 

You sighed and gently got on top of him with the intent of ignoring him and finally fall asleep. 

But his expression changed when you were near enough. “I want you to be completely fucked up when I’m done with you.”

You lifted one hand to cup his cheek and kissed his nose. 

He blinked at you amused. 

“I love it when you smile like this,” you whispered. 

The dying flames danced on his face as he stared at you for a few moments. 

Then you clicked your tongue. 

“Don’t do this.” 

“Don’t do what?” 

“Don’t get all dark and distant.” 

Doyoung exhaled. “I am not.” 

“There’s so much to be proud of, don’t you think?” Your fingers gently started to draw patters on his forehead, going down on his eyes as he closed them, then on his cheeks. He opened his eyelids again after the touch and you talked again. 

“Like striving to do good. Trying. Surviving.” 

His lips opened to let out a small puff of warm air. Then he hugged you tighter and hid his face in the crook of your neck. 

You exhaled too, closing your eyes and lulling his exhausted soul. 

“I am so proud of you,” you whispered but you didn’t know if he heard you.

_________

You woke up in Doyoung's bed. 

It was huge, warm and it smelled like his laundry detergent. The sheets were soft and luscious, caressing your naked body as you shifted underneath them to look to the side. 

Your eyelids fluttered and your lips turned their corners up. 

Fighting the urge to squeal and hide your face inside the pillow, you resorted to admire Doyoung's sleeping face. 

Resting on his stomach with raised arms thrown around his head, only his eyes and ruffled hair poked out behind his bicep and shoulder. And when he slowly opened one puffy eye you giggled and it curved, showing that he was smiling too. 

"Good morning," you whispered. 

Doyoung sighed once first. "It's probably afternoon." 

His sleepy voice made your body heat up and without thinking you just got closer. He turned on his side and wrapped your body with his arms, pulling you closer to his chest. 

"Did you sleep well?" he murmured. 

"Like a baby. You exhausted me enough."

The little kiss he placed on top of your head was so unexpected to make you lift your face. 

He smiled. 

"You inspire so much tenderness in me,” he explained timidly. 

You smiled back, resting your chest on his. His hands automatically wrapped your sides as if they've always belonged there. 

"I'm glad I'm softening your edges. Now you need to behave like this with everyone else too."

"You want me to kiss the whole hospital on the forehead?" 

"Metaphorically."

"Also, I thought you loved my hard edges," he purred, shifting your body to fully rest on top of his. 

His hard cock deliciously poked your clit with its tip as his hands slowly made you roll on it. 

You exhaled and leaned down, rubbing your lips on his as you whispered. "I do."  

His smirk was lazy just like your movements. 

"So you want me just like this?" 

“I want you. I want everything you are. I want everything that you hide.” 

Your hands caressed his chest and came to cup his face. His expression wavered and you found him so vulnerable all of a sudden to make your guts twist. 

“Unleash the darkness that you have inside. Engulf me with it. I am not afraid. I want it.”

Doyoung wrapped your body tightly and pressed you down on himself even more. 

"There's no darkness inside of me anymore. Not when you're around me."

__________

From “I will not vanish” - Haechan’s backstory

The heavy door opened and closed. 

Doyoung looked over his shoulder to see a stranger approach him with slow feet. He raised his eyes and gave Doyoung a small nod. 

The other did the same and when the stranger aligned himself with Doyoung, looking over the cold city, they both exhaled. 

The silence was so deep, safe for the ambulances screaming in the distance that Doyoung found himself restless. 

The stranger leaned on the rail, resting his weight on the elbows and sighed again. 

“You know,” he started. 

Doyoung looked at him with the corner of his eyes. 

“What I like about life,” he paused, “is that you can die.” 

The stranger bit his lower lip for a moment then looked over to the other. His gaze felt so heavy that Doyoung’s arms skin got goosebumps. 

“Imagine being immortal,” the man continued before letting out a dry snicker. 

“Around forever. A pathetic being with no reason to exist besides existence itself. Forever and forever and forever. With no purpose. Until you’d beg someone to kill you but they can’t.” 

Doyoung’s fingers twitched on the cold metal of the terrace rail and for a moment his rational mind wanted to ask that stranger just what nonsense he was talking about. 

But lately, Doyoung and rationality didn’t match well so he didn’t. 

“Immortality sucks only if you’re the only immortal one.” 

The stranger smiled bitterly. “Do you want to be immortal?” 

Doyoung put his hands inside the gown’s pockets. “I’d die tomorrow.” 

“But you wish immortality was a thing.” 

“I mean, I wouldn’t have a job anymore,” Doyoung smiled. “But yes. I wish people didn’t die.” 

“You’re very selfish.” 

That remark made Doyoung frown. “How’s that selfish?” 

The stranger turned around and rested his back on the rail instead. 

“Why do you want people to not die?” 

“Because-,” Doyoung started but didn’t know what to add. “Because it’s painful.” 

“For them or you?” 

Doyoung sighed. “Okay. I see what you’re doing here.” 

The stranger smiled a little. 

“It’s not like I think only of myself when others die. I think how unfair it is when I know they didn’t have the chance to do everything they wanted to do first.” 

“And what’s that?” 

Doyoung thought about it for a moment. “Just- living. Experiences. And most of them actually had enough time to do it. They just took it for granted. And it’s so- painful.” 

“And what about you? If you said that you’d be ready to die tomorrow, I guess you’ve been living your life to the fullest with no regrets.” 

“Actually, I don’t know if I’ve been living all of this time.” 

The stranger shrugged. “Just start now.” 

“You make it seem so easy.” 

“Living? Hell yeah. You just need to give less fucks.” 

Doyoung didn’t reply. 

“If you’re ready to die tomorrow, then you should not be afraid of living.” 

The stranger’s tone deepened and Doyoung looked his way. 

“Who are you by the way?” 

“Oh,” the stranger straightened his back and extended his hand. “I’m Haechan. Nice to meet you.” 

Doyoung imitated him and shook his hand. 

It was warm and in a moment so many thoughts came to Doyoung’s mind to make him breathless. 

"I thought I had my life figured out and yet after meeting you I got shocked into awareness."

"You inspire so much tenderness in me."

“I became obsessed with you and it scares me.”

“You could have just told me. You could have told me that you fell apart. Instead, you acted like it didn't bother you at all.” 

“You are worth the wait.”

“I can't let go of you.” 

Doyoung took away his hand so quickly to almost fall backwards. 

He took a few steps on the concrete of the terrace as if trying to get as far from Haechan as possible. 

“You good?” the other asked but his face wasn’t mirroring his question. 

Instead, a plain expression was adorning his feline features and for an instant, Doyoung felt terror.  

“You’re not Haechan,” he found himself whispering. 

The man in front of him cracked his knuckles once. “And who’s Haechan?” 

“My friend.” 

“Friend? Is someone that uses somebody else a friend?” 

“He’s not using me.” 

“Isn’t he now?” 

The man started to walk towards Doyoung slowly, one finger on the rail, grating at the metal with his nail. 

“Do you believe in soulmates, Doyoung?” 

Doyoung flinched at his name on that man’s lips and started to retreat slowly. 

“I do.” 

“Soulmates are people that always find each other regardless of everything, aren’t they?” 

“Yes.” 

“And are you and Y/N soulmates if Haechan is always there forcing you together like some sort of cheap mismatcher?” the man spit out the last words. 

Doyoung gulped and his brain tried to remember how he punched him in some past life and actually win. His surgeon hands would definitely get broken in a second. 

“Don’t you want to break this cycle? Find your true soulmate?” 

“That’s Y/N.” 

“Because you say so.” 

“I don’t give a fuck about your orthodox theory, Archangel.” 

The man stretched his neck to the side and Doyoung didn't have the time to run away.

[radiorenjun]

I Don’t Need It

• Pairing: Na Jaemin x Reader

• Genre: Angst, Comedy, Fluff

• Na Jaemin despised the idea of soulmates, he wanted to fight against fate for choosing his soulmate for him. Even if it means his stubborn childhood best friend wouldn't stop trying to make him accept about the similar tattoos on their wrists.

• Masterlist here!

• Chapter: iii, iv

"Hey Jaemin!" you exclaimed, bumping your shoulder against his teasingly as you manage to catch up to the poor boy. Jaemin sighed before turning to you with a soft smile, "hello y/n."

"So how are you today?" you asked, shoving your hands into your hoodie pockets as you walk side by side in the halls during recess. Jaemin felt his blood boil at the sight of you, after the day he had, he just didn't feel like dealing with your nagging.

"Y/n, I’m-" Jaemin sighed heavily before he felt an arm wrapped around the two of them, his good friend, Haechan stepping in between the two. "If it isn't my favourite couple!" the boy chirped, his bright smile lightening Jaemin's mood.

"Hi Haechan!" you giggled, ignoring his arm laying lazily around your shoulder. "How are you two doing in this terrible school day?" he grinned. "Just amazing." Jaemin rolled his eyes. "Looks like Nana here is having a bad day," Haechan used his hand that was swinging against Jaemin's shoulder to pinch the boy's cheeks.

Jaemin clenched his fists, "Hyuck, I-" Jaemin took a deep breath before being interrupted once again by the obnoxious school bell. Jaemin groaned internally, feeling Haechan's arm sliding off of his shoulder quickly before bolting away from them with a short "oh shit."

"Wow, not even a goodbye." you muttered with a chuckle before looking up at Jaemin who's expression looked grim, eyes cold and emotionless and his usual smile nonexistent on his beautiful face. "We should really hurry to class, Nana." You tugged on his sleeve as students ran by the two of you, only to have him jerk his arm away from you harshly.

Your eyes widen slightly at the action, his eyes not meeting yours. "You go on without me, I gotta meet Coach bout the next game." he mumbled. "Um, okay." you bit your lip nervously, "you want me to tell Mrs. Choi for you?"

"No, thanks." Jaemin replied dryly before walking away from you. You felt sadden as Jaemin walked away, starting to walk the other way to class. This was usually what you're looking forward to everyday. That one subject where you both had the same class at the end of each day.

It's not a big deal, he just gotta talk to Coach. He is the captain now that Mark graduated. He's got more things to do now, you shouldn't be so sad at his success.

You apologized to Mrs. Choi on being late to class which she just waved off before telling you to sit down. You sat down on the empty seat next to Huang Renjun, the Chinese student who moved in a few years ago, who was also one of your close friends.

"Hey Renjun," you waved as you drop your bag on the table. "Good to see you, loser. Why aren't you sitting next to Mr. Captain of the Football Team?" Renjun chuckled, not sparing you a glance as he fidgeted with his brand new watercolor set under his desk as to not get caught by your teacher.

Renjun was in the arts club with you, that's basically how you two met. The day you met was a truly iconic moment in your friendship, which ended with you accidentally shoving the end of an acrylic paint brush into his mouth.

"He got some things to discuss with Coach, so he couldn't make it to class." you pouted, crossing your arms on the desk as you began to write down whatever your teacher was explaining on the whiteboard. Renjun looked around class, now noticing that Jaemin was nowhere in sight of the room.

"I'm so glad to be your second option, y/n." he said spitefully, earning a poke on the temple by the end of your pencil. "Hey," he gave you a death glare. "Shut up, Huang. If he didn't reject me so much maybe I wouldn't be this desperate." you muttered, writing down sloppy notes at the speed of light.

"Oh please, even if Jaemin accepted your love, you wouldn't even spare a glance at anyone but him in this whole room til Mrs. Choi actually makes you sit next to me." Renjun rolled his eyes with a heavy sigh, putting his watercolour set in his bag before turning his head to copy the ones he hasn't written.

You sighed, playfully poking his sides in retaliation, causing the taller boy to flinch at the contact. "Speaking of that, it's been-what? Three years? And you're still going strong?" Renjun asked in disbelief. "Three- It's only been two years Renjun." you chuckled.

"Whatever," he rolled his eyes, "but like, how are you still going strong with the countless amount of times where he would reject you all the time?" he asked again. You felt a slight pain in your chest at his words, your mind flashing back to Jaemin's cold demeanor a while ago.

"Jaemin's just really stubborn. Why are you even questioning this now?" you tried to play it off with a smile, forcing out a small laugh as you gripped your pencil tightly, trying to make your mind focus on what's being written on the board than focusing on your stubborn soulmate who kept rejecting you.

"Yeah I know, but it's been two years, Y/n. Two damn years. I admire your determination and all but are you ever gonna just give up?" he questioned. You felt your heart sank at the thought, you wouldn't know what to do without your soulmate.

Everyone told you that being with your soulmate always made you feel whole, with butterflies fluttering around your stomach and your heart would feel like it was raised up to the clouds in heaven like a bird sparing through the sky.

The euphoria when your skins touch, the same exact feeling when you and Jaemin were casually hanging out. Deep down, the dark part of you knew that he was gonna get sick of you sooner or later. Yet you still had some hope left lingering, hoping that things would turn out otherwise.

You closed your eyes for a brief moment, trying to calm your thoughts as you slowly unclenched your death grip on your pencil. "Shut up Renjun," you flashed the boy a forced smile, nudging him with a teasing look before going back on your notes.

But to be honest, you don't know if you could continue paying attention without your mind wandering around.

"You okay?" you asked when you got in the passenger seat of Jaemin's car, shutting the door to be meet with a very dark and grim Na Jaemin with his eyes not gazing away from his phone. You knew something was up.

You and Jaemin lived literally next door to each other. Ever since Jaemin got a brand new car for his birthday, he couldn’t help but offer you a ride. “Fine.” he spoke in a monotone voice. He started the engine with a twist of his key, not sparing you a glance as he started driving. 

“You sure?” you asked after a pregnant pause, “you don’t sound or look fine.Did something happen at practice?” you added. You could see Jaemin’s fingers tightening their grip on the steering wheel. “I’m fine.” he muttered once again, but nonetheless your stubborn self didn’t want to leave him alone. His happiness was your happiness, after all.

“You know we could just talk it o-” you said before flinching at Jaemin’s bold yet sharp tone. “I said, I’m fine, y/n.” he huffed with a roll of his eyes. “I’m just having those days, just drop it.” he added without meeting your eyes. You stared at him for a brief moment, raising your brow at his tone.

You clicked your tongue before taking off your seatbelt causing Jaemin to turn his head to you for a small moment before looking back at the road. “What are you-” he spoke before he watch you move to the back seat and press both of your hands on his shoulder above the seats, pressing your fingers down on his clothed skin. Jaemin let out a soft groan at the contact, feeling his body relax.

“You’re clearly not fine. So let’s just talk it out and relax.” you smiled, trying to keep your balance on the moving car. “Y/N, sit down. What if you-” Jaemin interrupted himself with a relaxed groan as you dug your fingers on a sore spot. “Shut up and tell me bout your day, you dumbass.” you chuckled. Jaemin sighed in defeat, focusing on the road and the calming sensation of your palms digging into his shoulders.

“It’s nothing, really. Coach just gave me a big talk bout the responsibilities of being team leader, and the risks I have to take since it’s our senior year. And we’re gonna have tryouts for new members next week and I’ll have to be there, too. Everything’s just piling up into one, not to mention the exams, assignments and practice every two days.” Jaemin sighed.

You hummed, nodding as Jaemin continued to vent out his emotions to you as if you weren’t the same girl who was constantly bugging him everyday with your undying love confessions. It felt as if you two were sixteen again, before the whole soulmate problem came up. “I get it, with Seulgi graduating, someone has to be the president of the art club. Everyone wants me to be the leader but I don’t think I’m ready.” you nodded in understanding.

Jaemin smiled as you spoke,”but like, sometimes you gotta take up responsibilities when they’re given to you, you know? We just gotta do our best and start taking slow steps at a time.” you continued, trying to focus on massaging Jaemin’s shoulders. “Thanks, y/n.” Jaemin chuckled softly, his heart warming up, knowing you got his back no matter what. “I’m glad you always got my back.”

“Of course I do,” you smiled. “I am your soulmate after all,” you bit your lip nervously, you almost hesitated saying those words. You prepared yourself for the dark glare that was now peering at you through the rear view mirror, “Y/N...” Jaemin spoke in an exasperated sigh. “I know, I know. ‘Y/N, you know this more than anyone in the whole world, I don’t want to have a chosen soulmate, or any at all. I want to fight against what fate has in store for me.’ I heard you say this a gazillion times, Nana.” you giggled, mocking his deep voice dramatically.

Jaemin let out a small giggle, shaking his head profusely as he felt your fingers disappear as you crawled to the front passenger seat beside Jaemin once again. He watched you hop on to the passenger’s seat, clipping your seat belt on. He bit his lip as he recalled his tone early, feeling guilty slightly at his previous actions.

Soon he let out a small smile, doing a u-turn to head to your favorite diner. “Whatever,loser. You want to get some smoothies?” he offered with his charming bright smile, pupils shining bright once again that you could feel yourself fall deeper for this boy. “Do you even have to ask, Mr. Captain Of The Football Team?” you giggled.

Jaemin laughed, shaking his head at you. “One hour,Y/n. One whole hour. That’s how long I left you at Mrs.Choi’s class to sit beside Renjun and now you’re becoming him.” Jaemin jokes, poking your sides teasingly. “Imagine what would’ve happen if I left you with him for a whole day, alone.” he hummed curiously.

“Shut up, Nana. You know very much I rather be left alone with you,” you winked, causing Jaemin to roll his eyes at you. “Do I really need to reject you again? I’m sure you have my whole speech perfectly memorized in that brain of yours.” he chuckled. You felt your heart sank once again at his words,but nonetheless you maintained a bright smile on your face. “Who knows? Maybe you finally fell for me,” you grinned.

“Stop dreaming, Y/N. That’s definitely not gonna happen.” 

[fullsunalicia]

may I request a break up but then they make up situation with haechan/jeno? angst to fluff? AAA thank you i love ur writes sm

of course you can, love! thank you so much for requesting and for your kind words, i love you 🤍

Lee Donghyuck

You’ve been fighting all day.

He hates it. He hates having to be serious and to sit down, and he hates the way his temper gets the best of him sometimes. Haechan cannot bare to see the tears in your eyes, but when you gather phone and keys so you can go out to get a clear head, he begs you not to. He begs you to stay and take a nap and then you’ll talk about it in the evening, but you only mumble a small “sorry”, and then you’re out the door.

What Donghyuck also hates is when you spend time with his members after you guys were arguing. Sometimes, he tends to forget how close you and Jaemin are, even though you got together because of his matchmaker skills. So when he sees the snap Jaemin sends to the Dreamies groupchat where you’re sitting on a bench and eating ice cream, Donghyuck shouldn’t be seething, but he is.

He can’t believe you’d talk about your relationship problems with Na Jaemin. The thought drives him so far up the wall that he loses his temper the second you come back home, Jaemin’s hoodie covering your small frame.

Donghyuck hates the way his anger controls him during moments like this. It hadn’t helped when he and Mark and fought three years ago, and it certainly didn’t help now. You snap at each other back and forth, and he lets the words slip without even meaning to. The second they leave his mouth, he already regrets them, but he can’t take them back, they’re already spoken.

“Just admit you’re cheating on me already. I can’t stand to see you with guys who could provide you with much more than I can and I don’t want to be the stand-in until the right guy comes.”

Your mouth had fallen open at that.

There was no reason, no reason at all for him to have said that. You had argued this morning because of a guy that had gotten too flirty yesterday at a party, but it wasn’t like you had flirted back. Donghyuck had told you to stand up for yourself and atleast tell the dumb guy that you were taken. You retorted that being taken couldn’t have been more obvious than you holding his hand.

“Hyuck,” you had said, and there are tears forming in your eyes. His heart hurts so fucking much. That guy from yesterday just couldn’t leave his head - Donghyuck wished so desperately to tell the entire world that you were his and his alone, that you were his soulmate, that he wants to make you his wife someday. But he can’t, because he’s an idol, and he doesn’t even belong to himself. How can you be his when he’s never gonna be yours? “Hyuck, what are you on about?”

“Let’s break up, (y/n),” Donghyuck said. The room fell silent, and his heartbeat seemed to be loud enough for you to hear it. “I’m setting you free.”

You hadn’t stopped him from rushing out the apartment. You didn’t follow him down the many stairs leading to the street and you didn’t come to the dorm after to try and fix it.

Why should you? After what Hyuck had done to you, he couldn’t even look into the mirror.

He may have left that apartment, but his heart was still with you. Without it, he felt so unbelievably hollow. He tried to fill it with junk food and alcohol and the affection of his members, wandering from bed to bed so someone would hold him when he’d start crying in his sleep.

It didn’t help.

After three days, Donghyuck is awoken by something crashing loudly in the living room. His eyes snap open, and he raises his head to identify the commotion. The door to his and Johnny’s room is closed, but the noises only grow louder until they reach the door and someone turns the knob.

You tumble into the room, wearing not Jaemin’s hoodie, but his.

He moves to stand up, but you’re quick, falling into the bed and straddling him so you can give him a bone-crushing hug. He doesn’t even care about the fact that he can barely breathe like this. Haechan’s arms move on instinct to cradle your body lovingly, burying his face in your neck and breathing in deeply. This, this is what was missing, and he realizes that no food in the world could ever chase away that empty feeling.

You pour all your love into it instead.

“Baby,” Haechan whimpers, “My sweet baby. I’m so sorry for saying that. I was out of my mind. It’s just that I’m always so scared of loving you because I can’t give you what any other boyfriend can...”

“Hyuck,” you disrupt him. He whines loudly when you push him away, in the typical bratty way, but you shut him up with a hand to his mouth. “Don’t say dumb stuff again. I don’t want what anyone else would give me. I want you and I want to be yours.”

His heart soars at those words. It makes him giddy, a smile tugging at his lips, and he attacks your face with kisses, biting your cheeks and soothing it with a sweet peck after. “You always were.”

You giggle. It’s his favorite sound in the entire world. He apologizes over and over, but kissing him until he’s breathless does the trick.

(You later explain that the loud commotion in the living room was Jaemin trying to sneak you into the dorm, even though he didn’t live at the 127 dorm. You ended up scaring Doyoung and had resorted to running to his room. The entire house hears Donghyuck laugh about that.)

Lee Jeno

Jeno and you have been broken up for a long time, but it still hurts.

It hurts so much that you get breathless every time you see him and his group on social media. His voice drives daggers through your heart when you listen to him during interviews, and no matter how much you try to explain to your battered heart that it’s over, it still hopes for him to come back.

Loving Lee Jeno was as easy as breathing. Who wouldn’t adore him, with his kind smile and cute pick-up lines? The simple beauty of watching him rap, or having the air knocked out of your lungs because of how passionately he kissed you. His kindness, his attentiveness. It all drew you in and locked you into his heart.

And then he had pushed you out.

Not on his own accords, though. The dating ban was pressuring him, and SM was always uneasy with your relationship. No matter how much Jeno tried to convince them, in the end, they forced his hand and made him break up with you.

The fact that it wasn’t even his own decisions makes your heart bleed.

It’s an open wound that no one wants to irritate. Your friends don’t mention Jeno, and you never talk about him again. All the memories, the stolen kisses, the many up-all-nights where you shared secrets and life experiences, you hid it all away, never to be seen again.

You suffer in silence for a long time.

Exactly one year later, you see him on TV. His music video is being displayed on one of the flat screens that were positioned in the café you were in, and your friends hurry to hide your sight, but it’s too late. A sad smile makes its’ way to your lips - he looks so beautiful. You remember his shy smile after telling him that he looked stunning, just for him to whisper back: “You’re way more pretty, (y/n). The prettiest and most precious person in my life.”

Your friends quickly pay for your coffees and then tug you outside. You feel bad for burdening them, but they tell you that they love you and this was not burdening them. They’d always take care of you.

Unfortunately for them, they run you right back into Lee Jeno’s arms.

You squeak in suprise as you stumble, but strong hands hold you up. He’s gained muscle, is the first thing you notice, and his hair is dyed is blonde. The second thing you notice is how soft his gaze gets as he recognizes you.

“Hey,” Jeno says. His hands haven’t left your waist.

“Hey,” you whisper back, your eyes never leaving his. He’s heartbreakingly beautiful. Sharp jawline, eyes wide at the sight of you. You want to kiss him. Coughing awkwardly, you step back, and his hands drop to his sides. You want to apologize, but your friends are already tugging you along, cussing out Lee Jeno as they go.

He doesn’t even get to tell you how much he had missed you. Missed you so much he almost begged you on the spot to take him back.

Later that night, you receive a text message. Your heart almost jumps out of your chest. You thought you’d never see his name pop up on your screen again.

[07:26pm] lee jeno: come down

You don’t even lock your phone before storming out of your apartment, and you also barely remember to take your keys with you. You almost fall down the damn stairs trying to get to the street.

Lee Jeno waits for you, the biggest bouquet you’ve ever seen in his hands. He has your favorite smile on his lips, his shy one, the one you were shown everytime you gushed over him. You wrap him in a hug and tug him down so you can hide your face in his shoulder, and his lips find your temple.

“Lee Sooman is going to kill you,” you deadpan, but you still hold on to him to make sure he doesn’t disappear. Jeno doesn’t even answer, instead resorting to tilt your head and kiss you so many times until he’s sure your mind is fuzzy.

“I’ll tell him it’s not my fault,” he says, grinning from ear to ear. “You’re too cute. I ... want to give us a chance. Because I love you, and I think I’ll love you forever. Can I be your forever?”

“There’s no forever if Lee Sooman assassinates you,” you tell him, but it’s not like you can reject him. So you nod, hands cupping his face. “I want to be your forever, too.”

[nanasarea]

Omg, I love your worksssss especially the smuts Lol. But can I request a fluff with haechan where the s/o is tired and stressed and he wants her to rest?

[13:12] As you took yet another sip of your drink, you desperately fought the urge to just close your eyes and drift off to sleep.

You’ve been up for around 18 hours now and yet you still had so much work to do. Just as you were about to open the 57th tab, you saw your boyfriend from the corner of your eye.

"is that-is that y/n or a raccoon?” Haechan asked as he sat next to you. You jokingly tried to hit him, but you were too tired to use the usual force. 

“Weakling.” He joked before grabbing onto your hand and cuddling it.

“Y/N, i want cuddles and you’re in desperate need of a break, come on, you can finish this later.” He whined.

“No, I need to finish this. If I don’t, I’ll-” “If you continue, you’ll get a headache from the stress and sleep deprivation and you’ll get annoyed from me, so if you don’t get your ass in bed so we can cuddle, I will be weally sad.” He cut you off, starting to use his cuteness against you.

 “Aren’t you gonna annoy me whatever I do” You laughed, causing him to fake laugh before sending you a death glare.

“I’ll watch the latest One Piece episode without you then.” He said, sighing before you quickly turned to him and wrapped your arms around him.

“No no no no no no no! I’m taking a break, see? I just need to save it real quick, okay?” You asked as he sighed, hiding the proud smile on his face. 

“Fine, make it quick.” He said as you quickly saved your work and kissed his cheek. 

“No, I want one here.” He whined, pointing to his lips while doing the “kyuu” pose. 

“You’ve been around Renjun way too much, I feel like I’m dating him half of the time.” You joked, to which he whined.

“I’m nothing like him! I mean I love him to death, he is my platonic soulmate, I would do anything for him, he is the light of my life but he’s such a whiny bitch a-”, with that you dragged his whiny ass to bed for some cuddles. 

a/n: i’m so sorry this took so long, I hope you enjoy it! also thank you so much, I’m not that confident with my smuts haha 

[jising-jisang-jisung]

Soulmate!Haechan pt. 2

Word count: 1.2k

Genre: still kinda angst with Haechan but Jisung is a ball of complete fluff uwu

A/n: wow I'm making this seem like a Jisung fic idk might mess around also I finished this earlier than expected so sorry it's not proofread at all (I learned how to add a continue reading tab but I cant rn cuz I'm not on PC rn so sorry)

Part 1 | Part 3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haechan leaves the ice cream shop, forgetting to even order the snacks he was getting for his study date. He was so out of it, he forgot to even meet his girlfriend at the library. The boy was confused to say the least. As he sat on the bench by the sidewalk he was on, his phone buzzed for the 18th time since he got there. 18 unread messages from Mina 💌. He instantly snapped out of it, grabbing his phone to apologize.

Mina 💌: babe where are you? We were supposed to meet an hour ago!

Me: I'm so sorry baby!! I had to go home and forgot to tell you!

He lied, knowing that he probably shouldn't tell his girlfriend and soulmate about his encounter at the shop.

~

After you stormed out of the ice cream shop, you ran to the same park you had been at earlier that day. If only you had listened to your worries about your soulmate. At least then you wouldn't have embarrassed yourself like that. "Y/n, slow down! You're running too fast. I can't catch up!" Jisung huffed, still holding both of your sweets.

You abruptly stopped at the swings and sat down. Your breaths were shaking and quick from crying as well as running. "Y/n, what happened? Why did you just run out of there?" Jisung asked as he handed you back your ice cream. "I was talking with him... in my head- and he said he already has- h-his s-oulm-mate," you manage to stutter out, refusing to make eye contact with the boy. "Wait, you two were like communicating?!" "Yeah, sort of, I guess. I don't know." "Y/n! You know you can only do that with soulmates, right? That means he must be yours," Jisung states cheerfully. "But he said he already met his. There must've been some sort of mistake in the system. Everyone was right after all. I don't really have a soulmate." Your tears began to pour out again with the realization.

For a few minutes everything was silent between you two. Your quiet sobs slowing becoming less frequent as you finally calmed down. "Well, even if you don't have a soulmate, you have me," Jisung says with a shy smile. You had forgotten all about his situation, too immersed in your own sorrows. His soulmate took one look at him and claimed that she didn't want the system to decide for her and she had a boyfriend. Even though she knew that her boyfriend wasn't her soulmate, she still would rather be with him. "Thanks, Jisungie. You're my best friend in the whole world," you say giving him a small kiss on the cheek as thanks. He cringed slightly at your use of the word, friend, but managed to still blush when you kissed him. What a mess you were both in. Maybe you could just be happy with Jisung, your mind began to wander.

When you both had finished your treats, the sun was already down, so Jisung walked you home. "Will you be alright for the rest of tonight?" You nodded, giving a false smile to appease his worries. "I'll see you at school tomorrow, Jisungie." And with that, you closed your door and ran up to your room to continue crying.

~

Haechan stayed on that bench for far longer than he should have even been out. He just couldn't stop thinking about you. He felt pain in his chest seeing you run out of there. If he was being completely honest, he nearly cried too. His mind was so conflicted being that he already had Mina, but he also now had you. Sure, he's communicated with Mina plenty of times, but only when they are together. He could never talk to her when they were apart.

Thinking he was going insane, he decided to test talking with you again.

Hello? Can you hear me? Please- I'm so sorry.

It's okay. You don't have to pity me. My friend you saw, he was rejected too. We'll be alright, so please just leave me alone.

And then, there was silence. Hearing you tell him to leave you alone finally pushed him far enough to begin to cry. Haechan vowed to never contact you again, despite being fully capable of doing so whenever he wished. He forced himself to believe that that didn't mean anything, that Mina was still his soulmate. He couldn't bring himself to think that you were actually his soulmate and there was some sort of mistake with Mina. She said she loved him and he truly believed he loved her too.

~

The next morning you checked your phone to see a text from Jisung.

Beanpole 💕: hey :) meet me by ur locker before school!!

You got ready for your day as lathargically as you could, taking your time to do minimal makeup and put on comfy clothes. You felt as if your heart had been ripped out of your chest and trappled by sumo wrestlers wearing metal cleats. But why? Haechan had meant practically nothing to you. Nevertheless, you did as your friend instructed.

"Y/n!" He shouted with a bright smile. "Jisungie," you replied with much less pep. That's when he pulled a bag out from behind his back. "What's this?" "Just some breakfast for my favoritest person in the whole world," (❁´◡`❁) Jisung replied being as cute as he could. "Awe babe" you cooed jokingly at the boy. He even brought you coffee/tea whichever you prefer. He continued to walk you to your first class. "Jisungie, your class is all the way in the music wing, why are you walking me to my English class?" you ask in a whiney tone. He dodges your question to rather steal a bite of the donut he brought you. With a smile plastered innocently on his face, he leaves for his next class, already marked tardy.

~

Haechan groans. He already knows today will not be a good day for him. Mina would be unhappy that he ditched their date and didn't call her after the fact. He lazily threw on joggers and a sweatshirt not bothering to brush his bedhead. His stomach growled, asking for breakfast, but he didn't eat any. How could he? He was in turmoil for Pete's sake!!

Anyway. When he got to his locker, Mina was not waiting there for him like normal. He briefly looked in the direction of her locker, but she was no where to be found. She must be really angry.

Who?

What?!

Agh! Sorry! I didn't mean to do that! Bye!

His heart broke hearing the saddened tone to your inner voice, but what was he to do? Confront his soulmate, saying that he has another soulmate? Not today sis, and probably not tomorrow either. He grabs his English books and saunters to his first hour.

Shit.

Huh?

He turns around to see you looking right at him. Any smile you'd once had was now gone. You felt your eyes begin to water. However, you frickin sucked those tears right back in your eyes like a reusable straw, bitch, you aren't crying anymore. For the rest of the class you make sure to shoot daggers with your eyes to the back of Haechan's head. How did you never notice he was in your class? Most of your classes actually. Today was gonna be rough for the both of you.

[09yards]

Chapter 4 - broken hearts club, part one (Days Gone By - NCT)

Days Gone By masterlist | main masterlist

Broken Hearts Club Part One

'Cause misery loves company, so hey, what do you say?

15th June

Renjun had woken up first the morning after. Disorientated, dizzy and drunk on the familiar scent of freshly baked vanilla cookies and general comfort, like a hazy mid-morning daydream. Gradually coming around from his slumber, he began to register his surroundings; streaks of light, streaming sporadically through the cracks in the blinds, dark grey duvet only reaching his hips, his small frame on display, a large hand splayed gently across his back, curling him into a furnace – the source of the cookie smell. The t-shirt he was wearing hanging low and lose off his body - evidently not his - and his head was resting on something  (or rather someone ) far too firm to be a pillow. He was not in his own bed and he was not alone.

The scent was familiar, it was one he had become well accustomed to over the years. Belonging to the ever-so-perfect Jaemin. Shit, he was in bed with Jaemin, wearing Jaemin’s clothes and memories of the two making out and grinding on one another... and (oh god)  the soulmate mark, flooding his mind. Consecutive images flashing every time he blinked, dread flowing through his veins.

Why did he do that? That was his best friend , nothing more. That was not supposed  to happen, Renjun was supposed  to hold in his feelings up until graduation next year when he could happily move to the other side of the country, or another country for that matter, and avoid Jaemin until any and all feelings had faded away. Yes, he very much thought that running away was the best (and only) way to cope with his feelings.

Maybe he could fall in love with a nice foreign boy, forgetting about the picture-perfect, ideal type that was his best friend.

Feelings could be dealt with later. Broken hearts can be mended later. After all, misery loves company and it was beginning to feel like misery was all Renjun knew.

2nd of august [continued]

“Oh, come on Mark, just show us!”

The only time Renjun ever acted cute was when he wanted something, putting on a lilted whiny voice, fluttering his eyelashes and pulling out all his aegyo - which frankly just irritated Mark; he’d never understand how it worked on Jaemin, the younger would practically fall on his knees then and there whenever Renjun used it to get whatever it is he wanted. Maybe he’d just become immune to it after having a no longer adorable little brother who once upon a time didn’t need to try to do aegyo, he just was cute and Mark would’ve given him the world if he’d asked.

Jisung once asked if he could have the moon and Mark ended up spending two hours putting a glow in the dark stars and moon sticker set up on Jisung’s ceiling, which are still there.

“Mark! Why are you hiding it, everyone knows about mine and Yuqi’s, about Renjun and Jaemin’s, Johnny and Ten’s, Doyoung and Jaehyun’s, the list goes on. You’re just the next one to have it, it’s no big deal.”

No big deal that you don’t want to tell your best friend because the moment you see his reaction, you’ll know if he’s your soulmate or not. Sure, no big deal.

“Okay! Lucas leave Markie alone. He’s my shy little brother remember; his soulmate mark is interesting  to say the least and we’ll leave it at that, shall we?”

“Lucas is right though, what’s the big deal, it can’t be worse than Johnny’s.”

Mark inhaled quickly, firmly and very noticeably. Way to be subtle Mark!

“Oh no, you’re kidding its worse than Johnny’s! That’s brilliant.” Jaehyun turned and took a few steps out of the kitchen back to the living room, confusing the others until they heard a, “HEY! Doyoungie come here!” Doyoung appeared instantly from lord knows where amongst the seemingly endless amount of people gathered in his house, navigating his way through and around groups that Mark barely recognised. They were quite disgustingly domestic, as usual, but it was amplified by the copious amounts of alcohol consumed – most of which by Doyoung. Kisses to cheeks and pecks all over, stood just too close together for it to be publicly appropriate, Jaehyun’s hands never leaving Doyoung’s body and consistently moving to inappropriate places for innocent eyes.

Finding his spot with Jaehyun’s arm around his waist, body curled into Jaehyun’s chest but head turned enough that he was capable of conversation, or rather joining in on the teasing of Mark to get him to show the others his soulmate Mark (which had been hidden by his choice of a flannel shirt this evening, resisting the urge to roll his sleeves up despite the heat.

“What’s going on now? Injunnie are you still trying to get Mark to reveal his soulmate mark, I thought I told you to leave him alone?”

Doyoung was actually sticking up for Mark, but everyone knew he wanted to know just as badly. Everyone was desperate to know the moment Mark spluttered when he was first asked, apparently that was just the sign they needed that it was a good one. Not boring like all the other recent ones had been.

“No babe,” shaking his head and tutting at his boyfriend, “trust me, you’re going to want to stop pretending you don’t want to know – it’s worse  than Johnny’s .”

Doyoung’s eyes visibly widened at that, the same reaction as everyone else. Doyoung couldn’t stop laughing, gripping onto Jaehyun’s shirt in order to attempt to balance himself.

“Okay,” barely audible between wheezes as he tried to catch his breath from laughing, “Mark you have to show us, you cannot keep that from us. Seriously, how can  it be worse than Johnny’s, no offence Ten.”

Johnny’s mark was notorious in their small town (possibly village if you were feeling technical about population sizes), everyone knew about it. Word spread like wildfire the moment someone outside of their intricate friendship group overheard - the seal had been broken and that was enough. Johnny would never get over how utterly mortifying it was when his mother returned home to tell him all about the delightful conversation she’d had with Mrs Potter down the road about how scandalous this teenagers soulmate mark was, only to be told she didn’t know the name of the boy who had this tasteful  (said with quotation marks and dripping with sarcasm) phrase emblazoned on his body only that the soulmate was ‘the one who goes by the number rather than a proper name because his names too long’. His mother was devastated she hasn’t been told and that Johnny never explicitly told her that he was gay - although Johnny argued it was rather obvious and that he didn’t watch magic mike, multiple times, just because he loved romantic films. Johnny couldn’t look his mum in the eye for at least two weeks afterward.

Ten slapped his best friend on the arm for his commentary. Even after almost four years, Ten still hadn’t lived that one down and doubted he ever would – but he still hadn’t made his peace with it, the teasing continued to be relentless whenever the topic of soulmates came up and Ten was quite sick of it, his truculent nature sparking every time.

“Shut up Doyoung, just because yours is cute and all because Jaehyun was four and you did look like a fucking  bunny!”

“Correction, he still looks like a bunny, especially when we’re fucking.” Doyoung became visibly flustered at that, Jaehyun never being one to shy away from admiring his boyfriend at indecorous times, “Shut the fuck up Jae. Back to Mark! We were talking about Mark; Mark show us your mark!” Clearly Doyoung was a master at attempting to turn the conversation away from himself whenever he was flustered.

Doyoung was definitely a giggly drunk and a little obstreperous under the influence of alcohol, despite the situation, “oof that rhym-ryhmed, I’m a poet and I didn’t even know it!” He was grinning now, clearly impressed with his efforts towards an outdated joke, prompting Jaehyun to coo over his boyfriend (cough, disgustingly domestic, cough).

“If you not wanting to show us is about Haechannie, we get it, but you know we wouldn’t tell him if you didn’t want us too.”

Ten’s usual bite to his voice was gone and he spoke softly to Mark, despite his tendency to be louder and easily making his presence in a room known, he had a soft spot for Mark – seeming to care for the younger far more than he’d ever let on if asked. Typical tsundere Ten.

“Hyuck’s not here yet, right?”

Ten replied with a simple nod and a quick eyebrow raise to Johnny, a gesture that didn’t go unnoticed by Mark but he was used to being incapable of decoding their years-in-the-making ways of communicating nonverbally.

“Just, I’m not ready to tell him yet okay? If I show you all, he doesn’t hear a thing or I will know who to kill and I won’t hesitate to – I have dirt on every, single, one of you.”

“Okay, okay, whatever Mark, we solemnly swear to not tell Haechan or let him find out. Now show us that freaking tat!” Lucas would be the death of him one day, slapping a hand against Mark’s back and making him wheeze at the sheer force, partially knocking the wind out of him. How Yuqi (teeny-tiny, possibly quite fragile but also rumour had it she had a black belt in martial arts, Yuqi) hadn’t been crushed by one of his death-grip hugs, Mark will never know.

Exhaling deeply, Mark began to roll up his sleeve. He’d managed to tuck the tattoo away, hidden from eager eyes, underneath a long sleeve easily and hopefully he  could find some sort of watch or bracelet in order to cover it up before having to leave the house over the next few days. As he pushed his sleeve toward his elbow and lowered his arm to allow the others to see, the kitchen had gone silent. All four of the onlookers (not counting Johnny and Ten who having already seen it, were no longer completely shocked by the marking) were in utter shock. Silence had washed over them, the thumping from the heavy bass dance music Ten had put on earlier and the ticking of the kitchen clock were the only things heard. That was until Doyoung was, foreseeably, the first one to lose all composure and let out an unattractive snort before clutching to Jaehyun’s shirt once again in a fit of giggles, gasping in attempts to breathe, between muttering ‘ oh my gods ’ and ‘ holy shits ’, the others all swiftly following suit after that. Even Mark managed to crack a smile at their reactions, despite his unwavering feelings weighing down his shoulders. But hey, what’s new?

Lucas was the first to speak, managing to catch his breath enough in order to be able to from a comprehensible sentence. “Okay, you win, that is understandably something you wouldn’t want to share.”

“Damn, Haechannie did not hold back. Babe I’m so glad we were in reception, all these dirty thoughts, you people are so disgusting. I have never been as grateful as I am right now to have bunny written on my hip and for my first thought to have been ‘squish’.”

The seemingly automatic assumption that Hyuck was the one responsible (again), didn’t fully register with Mark, too focused on the conversation continuing – not giving him the chance to protest what everyone was thinking, maybe it was for the best.

“Johnny, please tell me we’ll never become as disgustingly domestic as them, I don’t think I could handle the desire to vomit every thirty seconds. I like fun, I like spice and flirting, not patterns and cheesy nicknames.”

“Shut up Ten, domestic is cute! Domestic shows commitment - don’t be bitter just because you can’t handle that.”

“Go take Yuqi on dates to drive in movies and other corny shit Xuxi, keep pretending you’re in one of those American movies from the nineties.”

“You’re just jealous because you can’t have dates outside of a five-mile radius of this house.” Ouch, wrong place and wrong time Yukhei, not good - not good at all.

“Okay everyone! Ten do not respond to that, Lucas go somewhere else before he starts fighting – you know I can’t hold him back. We’re here for my  baby brothers eighteenth everyone, not arguing over soulmates and relationships. We’re done here, everyone back to the party.” His voice was stern and husky, stretching himself to his full stature - Johnny was a fluff ball but not one you wanted to make angry.

Johnny was always the mediator, the only one allowed to tease either of his baby brothers – as soon as someone else did he would automatically switch into over-protective older brother mode. Mark thought it was his way of protecting them, he’d been instrumental in the raising of Jisung and had grown up alarmingly quickly after having lost their father and as their mother became busier and busier with her work. Then he grew up more after he was pulled into the world of parties and late nights by older friends from various sports teams, desperately trying to forget about his newfound feelings for Ten at the time, at the tender age of sixteen. He continued to mature as he started his A-levels and helping Mark with his GCSE’s and Jisung venturing into high school for the first time. Their mother was busy, always there for them whenever she could be but that didn’t hide the absence of a father figure. Yet, they made do. Their mum did everything she could and more and they’d be forever grateful for that. He’d had to mature once again when Ten got accepted into an entertainment company in Korea – his lifelong dream – and they weren’t ready to go their separate ways, knowing that as soulmates it would only hurt them more. Ten not being able to wander around town or take Johnny on magnificent dates during the daylight hours was a sore subject for the two of them, not seeing each other in person for months at a time was hard – but they made it work. They both remember, unfortunately very well, the pain they went through when they both realised their feelings for each other and Mark remembers listening to Johnny cry to their mum when he realised that he was hopelessly in love with his best friend. Mark remembers the homophobic kids that were the year above Johnny and Ten, threatening them in the hallway, Mark remembers Johnny outing himself in front of a substantial amount of the student body in order to stick up for Ten; not caring about if he was ready or what people would say. Mark remembers Johnny as a protector, a rock, their anchor – always keeping them safe and grounded.

Luckily, everyone knew when to drop a conversation and most quickly dispersed from the kitchen, re-joining the party. Mark let out a sigh of relief – he knew he wasn’t ready to deal with this yet. He could feel himself sobering up by the minute.

“Hey, Mark. I’m really sorry for pushing you earlier. That wasn’t fair, not after how understanding you were about me and Jaemin. Do you want to get some air?”

Getting some air was their secret code, their way of escaping the world – even if only for a few minutes. Mark always thought there was something about the way you could just sit there, watching the world go by without a care in the world. Something about the way the air flowed around them – like it was easier to breathe, easier to let go of your worries. Their words would flow out, sitting with their legs dangling over the edge of the treehouse with the ability to chat the days away. Thoughts, feelings, dreams, all shared with the world and no longer the insides of their minds, eating away at any and all insecurities and worries. It took them back to when they were young, when they didn’t care about what went wrong, whether they messed up or not. Mark liked how naïve they were back then, not a single care about the future - everything would work out in their eyes - now, it was a continuous cycle of crippling anxiety, an overwhelming desire to achieve, sleep deprivation and a strong inclination to do nothing at all. Procrastination was, and always will be, a total bitch after all.

The two took their designated spots, watching the sun beginning to set over the field before them, casting a rose-coloured hue over the scene. Mark always had a fascination with sunsets, he isn’t sure when it started but there’s something about them that draws him in, maybe it’s the colours or the way Hyuck’s skin glowed just like the sun itself whenever the golden hour light was cast over him, highlighting his features and only exemplifying his beauty more. God, shut up Mark. You sound like a stupid lovesick teenager, oh wait... that’s exactly what you are.

“Earth to Mark? Calling Mark back to Earth in three, two and - “

“Sorry! Sorry, got distracted, guess there’s just a lot on my mind.”

“You don’t say. Come onnnnn! It’s your birthday Markie, we’re supposed to be having fun and getting far too drunk off of what will be later recounted to our parents as ‘just the one cider or beer’ and then regretting our entire existence in the morning when we’ve realised all the mistakes we’ve made while under the influence. For example, being three drinks in and already kissing boys that are far too pretty for their own damn good and frankly it’s very unfair.”

“So we’re less than two hours in to the party this time and you and Jaemin have already made out in my bathroom?”

“No, we only got to the hallway and then Hyuck rang him, something about an emergency and Heejin. Oh shit, sorry Heejin free zone.”

“It was a rhetorical question and I’m okay, you don’t have to keep things from me. Honestly, I’m okay. I know it’s the same old stupid, stupid trope but i’m not going to spend the rest of the year pining for my best friend. i’m going to enjoy this year; i’m going to get my grades and i’m going to get into uni and you know what renjun? i can do this, i can; not anyone elise - just me. I’m going to do this. I am sick of waiting around for things to happen. I am not going to sit around and look pretty while he inevitably breaks my heart, he has Heejin now. He’s not gay. School is my priority and that is something I can control. All the things I can fix, why not fix them now while I can?

Me and Hyuck, we don’t act like boyfriends, people don’t assume we are. They assume we’re best friends and maybe that’s all we’re ever meant to be. Maybe i’ve just confused the line between caring about someone and loving them. I am done crying over him, I’ll focus on being friends nothing more. That’s all we need and I’m perfectly okay with that.”

“So pining hours are over for you?”

“Pining hours over Hyuck are officially closed.”

“And where do we stand on pining hours for me over Jaemin being open?”

“Still very much open young padawan, it’s time for you to be honest with me.”

“Great because I love him, so much. But I’m also super scared. I know it’s supposed to be us against the world, I know that it’s supposed to be about you and hyuck being able to be just friends but I can’t do that with him - I really love him, like singing and dancing in the rain love him, hold a boom box outside my bedroom window love him. Like one make out session was so intense I forgot everything in that moment, I want to do that again and again.”

“So rather than telling him your feelings, you’re going to keep getting tipsy at parties and kissing him?”

“Yep. He has nice lips okay, don’t judge me.”

“Why won’t you just admit you’re soulmates? You could be happy, you can fall in love and let him look after you.”

“See, that sounds nice and all but after he freaked out thinking I don’t have a soulmate mark and we’re some freak exception to the rules, I don’t really know how to tell him he forgot to take my socks off? It also sounds kinda kinky and he’ll definitely make a sex joke and I’m not ready for that.”

“Well, whenever you are ready, for any of it, you know you’ve always got me.”

“You know this is the part where you’re supposed to tell me to go get that Jaemin dick?”

“I am not telling you to go get that dick-“

“Why are you two always hiding out here? Okay, why do I feel like you were talking about me?”

“Hey Jaemin, we were just coming down. Just wishing Markie a happy birthday.”

“Come on you two, but avoid the snug - Doyoung is giving Jaehyun a lap dance, Jaehyun’s also shirtless so there’s a bunch of girls drooling, mainly Mina so soon enough she’ll be on the vodka crying over the fact that ‘all the cute ones are gay’.”

“Let’s go then!”

You can do this Mark, you can have fun. It’s your birthday, get drunk and dance the night away.

[hannaday81]

My NCT Fanfic Recs

Mark + Donghyuck = Markhyuck

akajung

want me to spell it out for you? Oneshot

“We’re just friends,” Donghyuck says, because they really are. They’re just friends, nothing more, nothing less. “Mark and I, we’re just friends.” It’s usually not a lie. Usually. Or, alternatively: five times Donghyuck denies seeing Mark as something more than a friend, and one time he finally doesn’t.

anons

retracing steps Oneshot

It takes one accidental time-travel and one day of dating Donghyuck in another reality for Mark to realize a few things. [About Time AU]

berryboys

Crystal Scarlet Chaptered - Completed *NEW

Three years of Auror training for this, Mark bitterly realizes. Three years of sweat, of long nights without a single second of sleep, of putting his life on the line, of emotional and physical pain, culminating in Donghyuck. Because one can never escape from a Slytherin, not if they don’t want you to escape, and Donghyuck has always enjoyed wrapping his fingers around the little freedom of Mark’s life.

bloodplum

the inconceivable idea of you Chaptered - Ongoing

Mark knows that his soulmate is real. He’ll search the world for them, if he has to. But as far as Donghyuck’s concerned? Soulmates don’t exist. Or: AU in which some people seem to have soulmates and others don’t, but everyone deserves to have good things.

bluebot

rewrite the stars Chaptered – Complete *NEW

Donghyuck’s got a crush. He’s the perfect boy-- he’s cute, he’s polite, he cooks. Donghyuck’s friends even like him. The catch? He’s a robot.

celegant

sweet relief (pretty please)  Chaptered – Complete -NEW

It takes a year, an unhealthy obsession with Lord of the Rings, and a few unexpected video calls with Mark’s mother before Donghyuck realizes that he’s somehow managed to literally fuck his way into an actual relationship. (Or: ‘101 Ways to Fail at Being Friends with Benefits’ featuring Mark and Donghyuck.)

Crimsun

Hopeless hearts just passing through (I was made for loving you) Chaptered – Complete

Donghyuck's mother was the demon looming over his shoulder. She painted his life with harsh greys, desolate blues and destructive reds. So when she pushes him to a cage with Mark, he knows there's no escape but he also knows he wants to love the man he married. So he tries. He succeeds.(It was never hard anyway)

dhyuckie, kingtatae

skinny bitch Chaptered – Ongoing

Lee Donghyuck is fat.

euigeon

the choices we make Oneshot

Donghyuck waits on someone who'll never be his. He waits and waits and waits and hopes his wounds don't get worse over time.

fateline (orphan_account)

night by night (lullaby, rockabye) Chaptered – Complete

Mark’s crisis begins like this: Donghyuck slips into Mark’s bed and into his heart.

flowerboyeol

and you know how (i like dancing on thin ice) Oneshot

lee donghyuck absolutely rued the day he presented because the dumbasses claiming heats were just “bad, but bearable” were absolute fucking liars. okay, maybe he’s exaggerating a little bit, but he swears heats are actually worse than they sound. at least mark exists, donghyuck thinks. bless his pure soul and ability to look past donghyuck’s questionable (and probably very frustrating) attitude—unbridled irritation and mood swings and all.

galaxy_neozone

Ships Passing in the Night  Chaptered -NEW

One minute, Haechan is falling asleep in the dorm after a 127 schedule. The next he’s waking up as Lee Donghyuck, a high school student in a tiny, nowhere town that sounds oddly familiar. No one around here has ever heard of NCT, half the older members are living the frat boy stereotype in college, and it’s as if Mark and Johnny never existed at all. Something is seriously wrong with this picture, and time is running out to make it right. Haechan never realised just how much he relied on his brothers until they were all suddenly leading their own separate lives, without him. He needs to bring them all together in this strange new life, no matter what it takes, or risk losing them forever. Or, the one in which Haechan misses his family but they don't even know he exists. And he's really not okay with that.

hitmyheart

You, You, You Oneshot

Mark’s actions are always louder than his words. (Six times the members misunderstood Mark and Donghyuck’s relationship and the one time Mark finally makes his feelings clear)

hyuckieberry (95pjm)

Eyes On The Prize (Not On You) Oneshot

Where there's a grand prize at stake, a few hurdles to cross, and some home truths to uncover.

hyuckshot

A Whirlwind of Warm Hearts Oneshot

Donghyuck came to him fast like a sudden burst of whirlwind and the omega left just as fast.

The Omega is the Boss of Me Oneshot

There was nothing to worry about because Mark always had his eyes on Donghyuck. It’s a settled agreement that Donghyuck was his and he was Donghyuck’s.

hyuckios

lose it  Oneshot -NEW

Mark's eyes flutter open, and he scoots himself up further against the headboard. With a pull at his collar, he tugs his shirt off, making Donghyuck suck in a short breath. Oh, he's going to fucking lose it. "C'mere, already," Mark lifts his arm. "Yes, I want to cuddle. Why are you being weird?" Gnawing on his bottom lip harder than ever, Donghyuck kicks his shoes off, nearly stumbling back over to the bed as he stares at Mark's bare chest, lifting the covers slowly. Donghyuck doesn't think it's weird, no, not really... he's just never really cuddled with Mark.... alone. Sure, he's cuddled up to Mark playfully in front of their friends, in front of cameras, or even when he's sleepy, but never in a comfortable and dark room—never just the two of them.

ilovenct

creature of habit Oneshot

If Jeno was the angel on Mark’s shoulder, then Donghyuck was the devil, and Mark wanted to do something that felt wrong, even just once.

i look for myself within you Oneshot

Donghyuck cared about nothing, and Mark cared a little too much about everything.

ImJaebabie

Back To Square One  Oneshot *NEW

Donghyuck would really just like to be hugged sometimes.

iubi

between the lines Oneshot -NEW

Fuck him out of your system, they said, but Mark seems to be doing quite the opposite really, and he's not entirely sure if realizing he's in love with Donghyuck is helping in that direction.orMark is a novel writer and Donghyuck is his best friend who happens to be very eager to help with the more practical aspects of writing.

Light me up Oneshot -NEW

Haechan takes it upon himself to teach Mark how to kiss, but Mark ends up learning more than he signed up for.

kailogan

The Betting Pool Oneshot

Donghyuck wants to get revenge on Chenle for ruining his upcoming prank. During his search through Chenle's phone however, he discovers that the other members of NCT have a bet based on when he and Mark will start dating. Which is ridiculous because Donghyuck found Mark about as romantically attractive as a dead fish. Or, so he thought. Alternatively, Donghyuck always gets what he wants.

milksbars

left to right - (but you’d leave with me anyway) Oneshot

Mark’s eyes narrow instantly and Donghyuck can smell the immediate shift in his scent as he tugs Donghyuck closer, pulling him away from the other guy’s hand. “Don’t touch him,” he snaps, and his hand’s not on Donghyuck's ass like the younger had instructed, but it’s pressing possessively against the small of his back, which is such a Mark thing to do that Donghyuck can’t help but relax a little into the touch.

Mntsnflrs

Fire and Dreams  Oneshot  *NEW

“What are they?”“Things,” the boy says, cocking his head slightly to the side. “Dangerous things.”Mark swallows. His heart hasn’t slowed, like it knows more than his mind, his eyes. “And what are you?”The boy smiles. It’s a childish expression, young and unpracticed, but so pretty it hurts to look at, made for stronger eyes, a stronger being. “What am I?”Mark asks again. “What are you?”“A thing,” the boy says. “A dangerous thing.”

orangecaramel05

I Like Me Better When I'm With You *Chaptered - Complete

Haechan was unique. He was an omega, and by nature he should be submissive to alphas and betas, he should be soft, he should be kind, he should be altruist – but he was not. He was loud, he was obnoxious, he was playful, witty, short-tempered, and most important of all, he wasn’t naturally submissive. He liked himself that way and the alpha that would be his would have to deal with it. Hence why he thought he would find love at thirty. Comes Mark Lee.

pududoll (aprilclash)

beneath the moon and under the sun Chaptered - Complete

Donghyuck has a crush on his roommate. Who is a vampire. And most certainly doesn't like him back. (Maybe).

stealing the sun is not enough Chaptered - Complete

Mark Lee is a demigod with a knack for terrible decisions and a crush on Donghyuck from Apollo's cabin.

scintilla (adrarerien)

drink up the evil (and you'll spit out the truth) Chaptered - Complete

Maybe it started when Mark and Donghyuck were forced to pretend to the world that they were lovesick fools, or maybe even way before that. or; a markhyuck fake-dating-enemies-to-lovers!au

SlimeQueen

Out Of Your Mind Oneshot

Mark just wants to be a regular teenager. Or as regular as an eighteen-year-old sharing his body with a demon can get. And unfortunately for him, Donghyuck loves making things complicated.

smoothui

Appreciated Oneshot

Everyone has a bad day and takes it out on Donghyuck, who's more fragile than he seems. Donghyuck likes to pretend he's not affected but Mark can see through his front.

taeminki

Haechan is Mark's Muse Oneshot

In which Donghyuck deserves to be loved and Mark can hardly believe he's the only person who recognizes that.

Thatlongassridehome

Good thing (That whiplash) Oneshot

'You know what I mean, I like being alone.Except for when I play with you.' Mark and Donghyuk go on a mission, and of course something happens when Donghyuk’s playing in the face of danger.

unbalancedlove

one step closer (to reach you) Oneshot

there isn't a class in hogwarts that teaches you what to do when your crush drinks a potion and falls madly in love with you.

winko (donghyucks)

open up your soul and let it pour flooded Oneshot

Before he can react and ask what the hell just happened, Mark feels a mouth press against his own with fervor. Donghyuck keeps his own lips pressed against Mark’s for a good couple of seconds until he pulls back.  “Stop thinking so hard,” is what he says from above him.  And so Mark does.

--

Jeno + Jaemin = Nomin

akajung

don't leave me for a second, my dearest Chaptered - Ongoing

“Should I just blast him from here?” Jaemin asks Jeno, fingers carefully and quietly placing themselves on the small of Jeno’s back. It’s really super fucking ridiculous, the way he feels the warmth of his amplified power coursing through his veins just from having his hand on Jeno and feeling his breath on his skin as Jeno whispers in his ear, “No, you can’t do that.” (Jaemin's stronger around Jeno, quite literally, and maybe that's not always for the best.)

berryboys

Invisible, Unlikely, Impossible Chaptered - Complete

And what Jaemin fears, over all those things, is that Jeno assumes that Jaemin wants him this way – broken, caged, to his mercy.

fateline (orphan_account)

hands off (eyes on me) Oneshot

Jeno's with Jaemin when a drunk alpha hits on Jaemin at the club.

Kihyunie

We Can Be Braver *Chaptered - Complete

Jeno knows Na Jaemin, of course he does. Well, he knows of him anyway. There’s not a single person in this godforsaken high school who doesn’t. Jaemin is everywhere, up in everyone’s business. He hangs out with all the other cool kids and even the teachers greet him in the hallways. So yes, Jeno knows of him, too, he doesn’t live under a rock, and they've talked, once or twice. But he doesn’t know him and that's fine because they frequent different crowds. Jeno keeps to himself. Jaemin doesn’t. Jaemin keeps to everyone but to himself. Everyone knows that, too. (aka Jaemin is popular and Jeno didn't think he'd care until suddenly he does.)

_laugheisis

holy sinner *Chaptered – Complete (Spanish)

Jaemin no quería dejar de ser gay, y Jeno, su tutor cristiano, no planeaba caer ante sus encantos.

ZaiJam

Growing Wolf *Chaptered – Complete (Spanish)

Cuando los cachorros se convierten en adultos deben de tomar un lugar en la manada. Jaemin está seguro de que será el mejor alfa de todos y a Jeno no le podría importar menos lo que sucede con la manada.

--

Lucas + Jungwoo = luwoo

idlesong

neither would suffice Chaptered – Complete

Yukhei may be the devil, but he’ll be damned if he lets heaven take another soul. Or, how Donghyuck’s arrival in limbo causes everything to collapse.

[fullsunalicia]

Can I request about she being brazilian instead?..

sure bubs! thank you for your requests <3 i hope you guys don’t mind that i combined those, since they’re pretty similar! if not, please let me know and i’ll fix it!

Moon Taeil

wants to know EVERYTHING. every single memory you connect with home, your favorite place in your hometown, where you went to school, just wants you to spill!!! brazil is such a beautiful country, and he wants to know all about it!

definitely wants you to teach him some portuguese. i think everyone in nct would learn atleast a few words, because they love learning new stuff, especially something that connects them to you!

plus, it’s so endearing to listen to taeil try to pronounce difficult words :( PLS he’s so cute

Seo Youngho

a m a z e d. brazilian and korean??? huh?? how cool is that!! you need to spill every detail of your parents’ love story. mr johnny would like you to spill the tea, ma’am. definitely bawls atleast once (1) because that shit is so cute.

just like everyone, he’d be so curious about your home and your native tongue, and he demands to have you speak to him in portuguese. can’t understand for shit tho

learns atleast a little to impress your parents the next time they meet!!

Lee Taeyong

flustered. that’s such a cool heritage to have and he honestly can’t decide if he’s envious or proud to have such a stunning girlfriend ?? like ?? wow. lee taeyong must be the luckiest man alive!

different from johnny, ty gets the gossip straight from the source! he bores you to death by forcing you sit down with him and your mom and listening to her for houuuurs about how it all happened

he just wants to treasure you and your values and get to know your culture !! (since he’s planning to wife you up teehee)

Nakamoto Yuta

happy yuta is happy !! as a part of nct’s foreign line, he’s honestly going to be giddy ALWAYS when he gets to meet someone else who isn’t from korea, or not entirely. and if it’s his girlfriend?? even better!

i feel like even though he’s been in korea for so long, he still gets homesick pretty badly. maybe it’s not as frequent anymore, but when it does, yuta feels really down. so to have you share that sentiment with him, it feels like such a relief! you guys carry the same burden

whenever that happens, you plan a big movie marathon with japanese and brazilian movies and spend hours on end cuddling and translating for the other !! he loves you. yuta wants you to know you’re not alone.

Kim Doyoung

this man is so smart he’s going to know some basic portuguese by the end of the week. if you told him about your heritage on monday, doyoung’s gonna walk into the kitchen sunday morning with a “bom dia. tudo bem?” like - what ????

he’s not very fazed by it, since he fell in love with you just the way you are. that doesn’t depend on what nationality you are. still, he makes himself a note to celebrate your culture with you and make the effort to bond with your parents about it, aswell!

first one to sit down in your momma’s kitchen and taste some brazilian dishes. ngl

Jung Jaehyun

is in awe! he loves the fact that your parents’ love transcends countries, no matter if you live in korea or brazil. it’s honestly very romantic to him and he wishes for your relationship to be like that, aswell. soft boy jaehyun :(

wants to try all of your favorite dishes and wants to travel to your hometown and learn all the places by heart where you hang out and get streetfood and everything else !!!!!! he loves you so much and this is just another part of his journey on getting to know you

you weep a little when he tells you “te amo” in front of your family home in brazil. god where can i find myself a jung jaehyun

Kim Jungwoo

sweet babyboy acts disappointed that you’ve just told him now, but he can’t contain his excitedness for long. how cool is that!!! his sweet baby is part brazilian !!!

BIG fan of listening to you speak in your native tongue with family members. when you first spend christmas in brazil with him and your relatives, he spent the entire evening playing with your fingers and making heart eyes at you while you speak in portuguese

it just sounds so dreamy ?? gosh your voice was given to you by an ANGEL. and for his s/o to speak in a foreign language so smoothly? wow....

Dong Sicheng

like any other member of nct’s foreign line, sicheng’s eyes will immediately light up when he first finds out about your roots. he feels so connected to you because of the fact that you must’ve gone through the same struggles, or atleast some of them!

to make you both feel home, he proposes the idea to have a dinner solely with chinese and brazilian dishes!! it’s so much fun that you spend hours prepping food and giggling around while smudging oil on the other’s cheek or pour some flour there.... until you cook to much and have enough to feed ot21

sicheng loves you no matter what your nationality is, but he’s so glad that you want to teach him all about your heritage and the family stories and everything beyond that. you’re his soulmate! knowing everything about you comes with that. i’m gonna cry i love sicheng

Mark Lee

honestly i could go in depth about how mark would be so shocked but why put it into words when there’s the perfect kaomoji to explain it. this is him, an accurate portrayal: （＊〇□〇）……！

another member of the foreign squad, mark loves exchanging memories of your hometowns and comparing experiences when being in another country! it’s different and the same at once, and it’s a very wholesome experience for both of you. you’re close already, but at the end of it it feels like you’ve seen an entirely different side of each other. a good one!

sweet babyboy learns all the portuguese pet names in the world to make you feel loved :(( he wants to give you a piece of home because to mark, you already are his home.

Lee Donghyuck

look me in the eyes and tell me donghyuck wouldn’t IMMEDIATELY beg you to teach him all the swear words that come to your mind right now. do it. change my mind

besides that, he loves listening to you tell stories about your upbringing with two parents that come from different countries. he cannot properly relate to it, but he’s still going to genuinely invest himself into it and laugh and empathize with you. haechan loves you so, so, so much, and your culture is a part of you. so he’s going to love that, aswell.

you will regret your decision to teach him said swear words the second your dad walks into the living room to the sound of donghyuck cussing out his mario kart character in portuguese. rip y/nhyuck,,,,, you will be dearly missed,,,,,,,,,,