#' owen i think you're fully of shit '

[doctorcurdlejr]

This is from a longer post I wrote about I saw the tv glow but just posting this bit on its own bc of the conversation around the movie I guess:

The point is that this movie is one big glaring trans allegory about how it sucks dog shit to live in the suburbs, and even at our most repressed we find these little snow globes of actualization in the glow of a tv screen that isn't afraid to show you the world you see. I've seen some people say that, like, in this context accepting or coming into your transness is this monumental death of self, which I get, but I feel there lacks a nuance in that because either way Owen is dying. Unlike Maddy who buries herself alive only to come out renewed, Owen doesn't kill himself upon facing the reality that the world is constructed to keep him miserable and the only way out is to take back what it is that the world wants to keep scooped out of him. Instead he just passively lets it drag him to a much more permanent death. This lack of suicide sucks in the kind of way that forces you to sit in your car on the midnight drive home and think to yourself am I letting myself suffocate because at some point knowing the misery became less scary than admitting I've been capable of doing something about it the whole time?

Maddy is an out lesbian who left town to escape the misery and found it strapped to her ankles. She slinks out, an animal pressed against the gymnasium floor, and says "I'm not telling you anything you don't already know." Owen looks into the camera and narrates. He cuts himself open with a box cutter, fully acknowledges what's there, and the movie ends with his suffocating apology parade for the unremarkable inconvenience of his excruciating suffering. You can be gay and trans, you can know it and you can stop repressing it, but you're not going to stop suffocating until you can find a way to destroy the part of you that truly deeply does want to die, reaching for the comforting euthanasia of normalcy. Stop visiting the dream of the life you want and make it into your reality with the same kind of unrepentant conviction seen in some underfunded but wildly ambitious teen television series. In other words: you must try to survive the ego death of being weird. A weirdo, who doesn't fit in and doesn't want to fit in.

[allthingsfangirl101]

Unlikely Hero – Tyler Owens

Tyler's POV

The second I saw her, I put on my annoyed face. Y/N and I have constantly crossed paths. While I chase tornados, Y/N chases to collect weather data. The first time I met her we almost ran into each other. Literally.

Our truck was racing to follow a tornado. Y/N's van was following it for data collection. After our almost accident, we both pulled over and got into a bit of a screaming match. We weren't fully screaming at each other: just bitter insults and sarcastic comebacks.

Because of our argument, we both missed the tornado. When we drove away, I kept thinking about how fiery Y/N was. There was a brief moment where all I wanted to do was put her fieriness to good use.

Over the years, we've run into each other constantly. My group, her group, and my fans think we hate each other. That's not completely true. I find myself watching her van go, hoping that they are safe. After a storm, I often searched for her to make sure she made it out.

"Well well well," she scoffed. I smirked as she folded her arms over her chest. "If it isn't the famous YouTube Storm Chaser. He only does it for the fame."

"And here's Miss Weather Expert who thinks she can do this through her little numbers," I shot back. "She'd leave a town behind, only focused on her data. And people call me selfish."

"Which means you're going to be stealing my statistics in your little videos and making it seem like you're the genius," she said without hesitation. She patted me on the shoulder as she walked away. I couldn't help but watch her head up to her motel room, wishing I was going with her.

"You ever going to get past this back and forth and just ask the girl out?" Boone teased me. I sent him a glare before pretending to get something out of the truck. I didn't want him to see how much I wish I had the guts to actually ask Y/N out.

I was torn away from my regret and self-loathing when all of our phones started going off. I grabbed it and saw the Tornado Warning. Just then, I heard Y/N's door open. I watched as she ran down the stairs and jogged to her van all while giving her team instructions.

My breath got caught in my throat when Y/N stopped and made eye contact with me. She sent me a small smile.

"Stay safe, Chaser," she said gently.

"You too, Numbers."

* * * * *

The storm passed and we started heading toward the nearest safety base. The town was destroyed. The tornado ripped right through it. As we drove through the streets, we kept our eyes on the rubble, looking for any sign of survivors.

My stomach flipped as soon as my eyes landed on Y/N's team's van on its side. I slammed on the brakes and threw the truck into park. I ignored my team as I hopped out and ran toward the van. I looked through the window but nothing. I started scanning the area, looking for any sign of Y/N.

"Tyler!" Boone yelled as he chased after me. "We gotta get these kits to the. . . Holy shit. Isn't that Y/N's van?"

"Yeah," I said, my heart in my throat. "We gotta find her."

I left him and started searching the area for any sign of Y/N. The longer it took to find her, the more frantic the search became. Suddenly, I finally caught a glimpse of someone under a piece of metal.

"Y/N!" I yelled as I ran over to her. I ran over and instantly started trying to lift it.

"Boone! I need some help over here!"

He ran to my side and helped me lift it. Some of the others ran over and helped us hold the piece of metal. Once they had a good hold on it, I let it go and started to get Y/N out. I gently and slowly pulled Y/N out from under the metal, trying desperately hard not to worsen her injuries.

I got her far enough away from the metal and pulled her into my arms. I scanned her body, instantly seeing scratches, blood, and bruises covering her body. I reached forward and carefully moved some hair out of her face.

Boone appeared at my side and looked at Y/N over my shoulder. "Is she. . ."

"I don't know," I cut him off. "We need to get her to the hospital. Now."

I stood up, carefully with her in my arms. I had Boone drive as I sat in the back with Y/N's head resting on my lap. I kept running my fingers through her hair as Boone drove quickly toward the nearest hospital.

When we pulled up to the hospital, nurses came rushing out. I didn't want to hand her over so I carried her out of the truck. They started to take her from me but I stopped.

"Tyler," Boone said gently. "They can help her."

I finally let them take her but followed close behind. Boone held me back as they took her past the waiting room. He patted my shoulder and led me over to some chairs. I nervously bounced my knee, unable to sit still.

We were in the emergency room for hours before a doctor came to talk to us.

"How is she?" I asked as I stood up.

"We stopped some internal bleeding and made sure her broken ribs didn't puncture her lung," the doctor nodded.

"So, she's going to be okay, right?" Boone asked.

"I want her to stay here for a couple of days so we can keep an eye on her," the doctor nodded, "but she should make a full recovery."

"Can I see her?"

"She's still coming out of the anesthesia, but you can wait in her room."

* * * * *

I stayed by her bedside, waiting eagerly for her to wake up. Every time she moved, I flinched. Whenever a nurse came to check her vitals, I kept a close eye on her, wanting nothing more than to see her eyes scowling at me.

I was wide awake for hours. I wanted to be awake when she finally woke up. Not as soon as I would've liked, I heard her let out a small whimper. I held my breath, waiting for her to wake up.

"Y/N," I whispered, her name getting caught in my throat.

"Tyler?" Her voice was so soft it killed me. "What are you. . . What happened?"

"The storm hit your van," I gently tried to explain. "You were thrown from it. I found you."

"Wait," she cut me off. "You found me?"

"Yeah," I said, unable to look away from her eyes. "We were heading back to the school to drop off some meals, but I saw your van."

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"For what?" I asked, scooting closer to her.

"You're late to drop off those meals."

I shook my head and laughed. "I know," I teased her. "Never thought I'd abandon the needy for my archenemy. But I couldn't ignore the fact that I can hold this over your head for years."

"Such a gentlemen," she scoffed.

My teasing smirk dropped. Unable to hide it any longer, I gently grabbed her face and pressed my lips to hers. She let out a small moan as she started to kiss me back. As our lips moved in sync, my mind went to what it looked like when I found her. The image of her stuck and unconscious made me break the kiss.

"Don't do that to me again," I whispered as I leaned my forehead against hers. "Please don't let me think I'm going to lose you. I couldn't bear it."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "We were just trying to get to the school down the street. I was trying to stop being selfish and help the people. Like you guys do."

My heart sank when her voice broke. "I never should have called you selfish," I said gently. "I always thought our little back-and-forth was fun and flirty. I didn't mean to go too far."

"You didn't," she tried to soothe as she grabbed my hands. "I always hoped your snappy comments were you secretly trying to tell me you liked me."

"They were," I said quickly. "They absolutely were."

Y/N smiled when I leaned in and kissed her again. She broke the kiss with her signature playful smirk. "As much as I love our back and forth, can we maybe be a little nicer to each other now that we're. . ."

"Together?"

"Are we?" She asked, her voice dropping. I leaned in and gently kissed her.

"I'd like to be, Numbers," I whispered. She let out a soft giggle.

"Me too, Chaser."

[tonystarksproperty]

ꜱᴍᴀᴄᴋᴇᴅ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ʙʏ ᴄʜᴀᴍᴘꜱ | ʀ.ʀᴇɪɢɴꜱ & ꜱ.ʙᴀɴᴋꜱ

its 5am sigh..

my friend irl who wants to stay anon wanted me to write smut for these 2. at first i didnt see the hype but after some research, these two own my heart

lmk if this is my calling to write for wrestling

update authors note: IM SORRY IF THE READER IS SASSY, MY FRIEND DIDNT WANT THE READER TO BE BORING YKKKK SDDKJFBKFJ

poc female reader

grab a snack girlies cuz this is kinda long

warnings: 18+ content, sexual tension, fingering, teasing, you being a bad bitch, sasha & roman being annoying, but they're heels so its okay, plus theres fluff, little bit of angst, cursing, wrestling violence. threesome, face-sitting, cunnilingus, aftercare, dom/sub, flirting(?), f/f/m.

*takes place in 2020-2021*

After Survivor Series in 2019, a whole bunch of upcoming superstars debuted on the main roster, you being one of them. You developed such a name and fanbase for yourself, especially after your triple threat match at NXT Takeover. Ever since you were young, you admired wrestling and now you finally had the spotlight you deserved.

You and a few more friends from NXT got drafted to Smackdown, at first you were a bit intimidated, especially after such an epic return from Roman Reigns at Summer Slam 2020 or a crazy betrayal from Sasha Banks to Bayley. But after a year and a half on the main roster, you were finally getting used to it.

You exited Vince McMahon's office and continue to stroll backstage of the WWE Thunderdome. You had just found out that you have a match tonight. A #1 contender's match for the WWE Womens Smackdown Championship against Bianca Belair. You were scheduled to lose. It was rough, you haven't had an opportunity for a title in forever, but business is business. You strolled around the corner and accidentally bumped into someone who seem to be heading for McMahon's office. "Crap, my bad." you apologized before looking up and actually shitting in your pants.

Roman Reigns. Roman Fucking Reigns. And He looked mad pissed. "Shit." you accidentally cursed out loud, meaning to just say that in your head. "You better watch where the hell you're going or there won't be a next time for you in this place." he threatened maliciously. You scrunched your face in anger. Who did he think he was? Paul was to his side, making the most cringiest face you've ever seen. It was hard not to stifle a laugh. However, you scoffed at his threat. "You can't do anything, man. You may be Vince's favorite but that doesn't mean everyone respects you around here. Just ask Kevin Owens." You spat back with a smirk before purposely bumping into Paul then walking the hell away.

You heard Paul grunt when you made contact with him and had the most shocked face ever. "That newbie is getting too comfortable around here." Paul spoke to his tribal chief who was clearly impressed by your remark. "Wiseman." Roman spoke in such a rough tone that caused the stubby man to stand in attention. "Yes, my tribal chief." Paul stammered quickly. "Go get her." Roman said before departing to Vince's office with a small smirk tugging at the side of his plump lips.

You sped walked when you thought were out of sight. Your heart rate definitely increased as well as your blood pressure.

You just told off Roman Reigns.

You just told off ROMAN FUCKING REIGNS.

You opened the women's locker room and closed the door almost immediately. Sighing knowing you were now in a more comfortable atmosphere.

Until you weren't.

"You just always slam doors around here?!"

You sigh before turning your body fully to the woman you had issues with since you got here. Sasha Banks. Her arms were crossed as her right eyebrow rose in the most judgmental way possible. You had no idea what started your "beef", but you never entertained her, maybe that is what the problem is. You're here to wrestle and get your money and not to end her entire career. "Where are the others?" you asked, taking note of the empty locker room and ignoring her stupid comment. "Don't ignore me, bitch! I'm the legit boss—" she said while moving her hands and popping her mouth.

Here she goes again. The wonderful "I'm the legit boss, I'm the Smackdown Women's Champion..." blah blah blah bullshit. "Imma just head to culinary." you interrupted her mid-speech that caused her to open her mouth in shock. "Oh nah, nah, nah, NO! I know you did not just interrupt me. The champ?" She said while getting in your face. She has never done that before. "Oh, my fucking— Bitch, I don't give a fuck what you are!" You yelled back, quickly matching her energy.

Unfortunately, she wasn't expecting you to actually clap back, you never did. "Fuck out my face." you pushed her before swiftly opening the door to the women's locker room and making your way down to culinary. Fuck that bitch, always has something to say when no one says anything. You opened the door and smiled at the sight of your co-workers. Some greeting you with hugs and others with a simple wave. You walked over to where the food was being dished out and grabbed a couple of fruit and some of your favorite cheat-day snacks and put it on a plate.

You noticed Bianca, Kevin, Sami, Nia and Shayna were all sitting at the same table. Bianca waved you over with a gleaming smile. You walked over and snagged a seat to the right of Bianca and left of Kevin. "Girl, did you hear the news about the match tonight?" she asked while taking a bite of her salad. You put on the best smile you could. "Absolutely, girl. Proud of you, you deserve it. Get that damn title f'me, m'kay?" You said while punching her shoulder lightly. "Of course, girl. It's about time that the EST become champ!" she says gleefully. You grinned at her funny expression.

You looked at Kevin who took a drink of his water. You and him were close friends back in NXT before he moved up to the main roster. "What about you? You gonna be the one to finally shut that bitch up for good?" you say while elbowing his side a bit that caused him to chuckle. "Aye! Not too much on my cousin, girl." Nia was quick to say while you flipped her off with a giggle as she did the same.

Right when Kevin was going to say something, a certain stubby man cut him off. "Only someone worthy will "shut" the tribal chief up for good. And I fear that Mr. Owens is not the suitable candidate." Paul says out of nowhere that caused everyone to look at him stank.

He was quick to notice the atmosphere before bending down to your ear. "The Tribal Chief would like to speak with you." he whispered while you looked over at him judgmentally. "Tell him, fuck no." you whispered back while batting your eyelashes at the older man. His eyes widen in a way that almost caused you to laugh. "You're monstrous!" Paul yelled while quickly waddling away.

The group at the table laughed at the short man antics. "Yeah, I get that a lot!" You yelled at him with a giggle before rolling your eyes. "Dang, (name). What does Roman have on you?" Sami asked, genuinely concerned. You just swung your hand as if you were slapping a fly at his comment. "Man, I don't know. Nia's family is crazy." You said while smirking over to Nia who was now rolling her eyes. "Not as crazy as your ex." She remarks slyly before bursting out laughing. You did as well. Nia and you both casted on Total Divas late before you moved back down to developmental for more training.

A bunch of cameramen came in and told everyone the show was starting. You tried your best to hide your disappointment because you wanted to be happy for Bianca, but all you could see was yourself winning the contenders match and finally shutting Sasha up for good, but Bianca always did have heavy hits. You and the ladies walked to the locker room to gear up for tonight's show.

You and Bianca would be closing the show as the main event. It was actually great; it's been a while since women main evented shows on Smackdown ever since Bayley's and Sasha's feud. The main events were just the Bloodline vs Kevin Owens. Not like it really bothered you, it was a pretty good storyline. Now all decked out, you were ready to perform. You and Bianca were standing in the guerilla, waiting for your cues to go out.

You both did your signature handshake and wished each other luck as Vince went over specific rules that were targeted towards you.

Bianca was always sooo smooth and on point in the ring. You sometimes get a bit "passionate" according to Vince and get reckless, even injuring your opponent but you promised to be on your best behavior because Bianca needed to be in perfect health to fight Sasha.

"The following match is scheduled for one fall! It is the #1 contender match for the WWE Smackdown Women's Championship!"

The producers hit Bianca's music and gave her the cue to go out. She high fived you before walking smoothly out of the guerilla.

"Introducing first, From Knoxville, Tennessee: Biaaancaaa Belairrrr!"

"Bianca Belair, definitely an upcoming champion and has the title that everyone is talking about in her sights, what do you think, Corey?"

"Well, Cole. I definitely think that Bianca is one hundred and ten percent champion material, but we shouldn't count out her competition just yet. Everyone in the women's locker room has Bianca in their view as well as the championship, especially her opponent here tonight."

Looking over at the small screen that was held up in the guerilla, you see Bianca doing her signature dance while swinging her braid crazily. You giggled at her foolishness as she got into the ring.

The producers hit your music and gave your cue. Just when you about to walk out, you felt a sharp sting on your ass. You stumbled a bit then catching balance and ready to curse out the person who has no manners. You actually were shocked at the person. Sasha, grinning madly like the crazy person she was while giving you a small wave. You gave her back a scowl.

"(Name), you're on!" one of the producers said, regaining your attention. You sighed before making your way to the curtain. You turn back and looked over at a smirking Sasha. "I'll get you later." you mouthed. "We'll see." she mouthed back. You rolled your eyes before catching Roman walking into the guerilla and standing tall next to Sasha. They both were definitely burning holes through your head.

Creepy. You thought.

You walked out and did your signature entrance, trying to shake off the haters. Literally.

"And her opponent, from (hometown), (state). The Essence: (Wrestler Name)!"

"Now let's talk about the Essence, guys. (Wrestler name) has always proven to be one of the best WWE Superstars throughout her entire WWE career with her dedication and creative moves."

"I know that's right, Cole! Go whoop her (BLEEP), (Wrestler Name)!"

"Pat, get off the table!"

"Something tells me Bianca isn't going to hold back on (Wrestler Name) because they're friends."

You were given a good pop; you were sure that's how the online viewers knew you were bound to lose.

Now that you and Bianca were in the ring. It was time for the timekeeper to ring the bell. You and Bianca shook hands before backing into specific corners of the ring, waiting for the bell. The ring-announcer stepped down from the ring and towards the steps.

You and Bianca both looked confused because the bell never rung. Instead, a familiar entrance came onto the speakers and captivated the whole arena into cheers and some boos. You rolled your eyes as Sasha did her beat drop dance and strutted towards the ring.

You could just tell this was her idea that Vince approved on since absolutely no one told you or Bianca.

"I guess we have some company tonight. Making her way down the ramp towards the commentary table is the Smackdown's Women's Champion herself: Sasha Banks!"

"Smart move from the champ. Scouting out the competition, calculating the impressive moves and skills of these two ladies who can be qualified to win a title shot."

The bell rung. Bianca ran at you with full speed; you were dazed by Sasha strutting to the commentary table that your got slammed into the turnbuckle. You held your head, collecting your vision as Bianca hoisted you up, preparing for a vertical suplex. You jumped off and hit her with a knee jab.

"Sasha, welcome! Any thoughts on these two ladies who are competing for a title shot at your championship?"

"You know, Cole. These two don't scare me. Whether it's Bianca or (Wrestler Name), no one can beat the legit boss."

"I got to ask, Sasha. You posted a tweet out, targeting (Wrestler Name) on Twitter, and I quote "Don't be mad that you're not the one." Can you elaborate on that?"

"Now, I'm not sure if you heard, Cole, but (Wrestler Name) been coming for the boss ever since her debut. I don't even know what I did but no matter what I always finish it."

You had Bianca in the head lock as you both leaned towards the ropes that was the closest to the commentary table, you overheard what she said, getting pissed and distracted quickly. Bianca took the opportunity and pushed you to the ropes across and slammed into you and went for the pin that you quickly kicked out of.

You see Bianca slam onto the mat in anger while you were still stunned. You were letting yourself get distracted by Sasha that you totally forgot about the match. Even if you were destined to lose, you definitely should've been on your game. You quickly stood back to your feet and hit Bianca with a back to back clotheslines, leaping to the rope and performing a perfect neck breaker.

"Look at the Essence showing some dominance in this matchup!"

You looked over at Sasha and walked over to the ropes near commentary and pointed at her title. "Your title is mine!" you screamed while setting up for your finisher. Little did you know, Sasha got up from commentary and grabbed your ankle from the apron, slamming you down face first onto the mat. It happened so fast; you couldn't even protect your face for the impact.

Fuck. That actually fucking hurt. You thought

"Looks like the Boss already knows who she wants to face."

You quickly got up and exchanged a screaming session with Sasha that you didn't see Bianca pull you into a roll up.

"Shoulders down! 1, 2, 3!"

"Looks like we know whose going after the title for sure."

"I call hacks! The essence was ready to end this matchup!"

You sat back in the middle of the mat as Bianca's music played throughout the arena. You furiously pulled yourself together before staring blankly at the champion who was smirking proudly. You needed to get the hell out of there before you really sock a bitch.

You rolled out of the ring and walked up the ramp to the guerilla to allow a quick segment between Sasha and Bianca to emerge.

You pulled the curtain to be greeted by Vince McMahon who looked very apologetic. "Why didn't you say something?! I could've atleast prepared myself." you asked while putting both hands on your hips to prevent you from hitting your boss. "Sasha thought it could add more to the storyline and it was a last-minute decision. But you killed it out there, kid! Keep it up!" he said while patting your shoulder then going back behind the one of the production screens. You rolled your eyes annoyingly before walking towards the women's locker room.

Of fucking course it was Sasha, convincing Vince it was a "storyline" that girl actually hated your guts. She never let you forget it. As you walked the halls, a handful of your coworkers congratulated you on an impressive match. Naomi says the storyline was very convincing, well if only she known. By the time you made it to the entrance of the locker room, Heyman was there with a sadistic smile. You approached him unfortunately. "Excuse me." you said somewhat politely, wanting to grab your things so you could leave for the night.

However, Paul just stood there, almost like a robot. "Paul, move. I need to grab my shit." you said again, clearly pissed off at the match you just had. He jumped slightly at your change of attitude before nodding his head no. "The tribal chief would like to see you, now." Paul spoke while adjusting his collar. You crossed your arms. "Oh, my fucking—fine! If gets you to stop fucking following me everywhere, shit!" you said while stomping towards the other side of the hall.

Since Roman was one of Vince's favorites and 'the' champ, he got his own exclusive locker room in the ThunderDome. Everyone knew where it was, since it was the biggest damn room in the dome. You stood in front of the door as Paul opened it, letting you in and quickly closing it. There he was. Sitting man-spread on one of the leather chairs staring up at the screen. On the screen displayed a replay about the terrible match you just had.

You cleared your throat. But he didn't acknowledge you. "Listen man, if you're going to give me the silent treatment, I can just take my ass out of here." you spat, clearly fed up with everyone and their antics today. His gaze traced over to you, and it sent chills down your spine. His piercing-like gaze was so intimidating to you, especially with those beautiful chocolate eyes. "Don't get mad at me because you loss your match." he said bluntly while staring back at the screen.

You rolled your eyes and turned towards the door until it opened, revealing Sasha. "Now what, bro?!" you screeched, you've had enough of her today. "You're so mad at a match you knew you weren't going to win. Unlike me, I always win." Sasha said while running her eyes down your body. It almost made you gag. "Alright, laugh it up for now. We both know that title is gonna be mine sooner than later." you countered, you were now the one smirking.

She scowled before trailing her eyes down your ring attire. "You stepped your ring game up, I see. Wasn't sure you could've pulled anything off since you're always hiding all the time." she smirked while tracing her fingernails over your left breast top that composed of your wrestler name. "You 'callin me sexy, champ?" you smirked, hoping to out-cringe her, but to your shock she just closed the distance and stepped closer, her face just centimeters away from yours. "And other things." she whispered while playing with your jawline.

You were actually getting flustered. How did this chick have such an effect on you? You backed up a bit. "Okay, girly. It's all fun and games until you start something you can't finish." You backed up a bit more, only for your back to run into a broad wall. "Oh, I definitely can't," Sasha admitted before smirking over at you seductively. You turn your head back to look up over at the Head of the Table himself. "But I can." Roman said, in a low, monotone voice that definitely made your thighs press together instinctively.

You turn your full body around to face him. Trying to gather words and comprehend what the fuck was going on? These two had to be joking, it must be national fuck around with (name) day or something. "Oh..." was all that you could murmur from your lips. This caused Sasha to giggle abruptly while Roman smirked at your sudden confusion. "That's all you have to say? 'Oh.' Maybe 'Yes, champs.' Come on, girly. Speak now or we could just pretend this never happened." Sasha said almost shamelessly while dragging you to one of the couches while massaging your sore joints.

Fuck, she was making you choose.

Your lip quivered as your struggled to get words out. You were forced to leaned back against the leather couch as Sasha soon began kissing your neck roughly. "Fuucck..." you moaned out lowly, as her lips worked magic against you. "Shit, that was actually hot." she whispered against your skin while her lips lightly grazed over yours. You were so focused on Sasha, you didn't notice Roman kneeling down before you, his colossal yet calloused hands gripping your knees, forcing you to present yourself.

His eyes pierce your soul as you gripped the leather beneath you. Struggling to find self-control in this situation. "Answer her." he commanded while taking a bite of your right inner thigh that caused you to tense up. "Uhm..yes..." you answered but your voice was barley a whisper from the embarrassment. "Yes who?" Sasha murmured against your earlobe before harshly sucking your sweet spot.

You lips closed again; it was so degrading. To submit to them. But your mind wondered intrudingly of the wonders of what the night would be like if you did submit to them. It took another bite on your other inner thigh by Roman to get you back to your senses. "Time is ticking. Look at him, you're making him wait." Sasha began yet again, moving your foot to Roman's apparent boner, pushing pressure down on it. Fuck, he's big, but those pants really needed to come off. He grunted a bit and glared at Sasha in slight annoyance.

You wondered if they ever hooked up.

You moved your head and averted your gaze away from them, this was actually embarrassing for you but so normal for them. "Yes, champs." you muttered before hiding your face on the cold leather of the couch. "Man...all that buildup is so dramatic." Sasha says while rolling her eyes while Roman unties your ring boots. You were now the one glaring at her. She smirked before grasping the back of your head, entrancing her fingers within your scalp and pulled you into a very long yet rough kiss. By the time Roman was done with your ring boots, he took off your socks while planting loving kisses down your calves to the brink of your ankles, soon to your polished toenails.

You shivered from his contact as you continued to fight Sasha for dominance, but she had already gotten the upper hand. She finally took her mouth off of yours before smirking with traces of your saliva on the side of her mouth. "Looks like I win." she states while wiping her mouth. "Everything is a competition with you...." you muttered while turning your attention to Roman who was surprisingly being gentle with you. You reached down to touch his beautiful locks, but his eyes shifted from your smooth legs up to you. You hesitated but something about his eyes gave you a look of assurance as you massaged his head.

You looked over at Sasha who just continuously stared. "I don't get it." you started as Roman began planting kisses on your other calve. "You two are assholes to me. What changed your minds?" you asked while removing your hand from Roman and returned to your lap. Sasha shrugged. "I don't know. Just to get your attention." she answered while pressing a kiss to your knuckle. "You can get my attention by being nice and not a dick, you know." you answered while taking your hand back with a rough demeanor. This caused Roman to laugh. "Where's the fun in that?" he asked while standing to his feet, towering over you and Sasha.

Sasha stood up right next to him with crossed arms. "What are yall 'thinkin...?" you asked hesitantly, almost intimidated by the glint in their eyes. They both exchanged glances before turning their attention back at you. Sasha pulled you to feet and soon switched your positions, so she was sitting. "Just give this a chance. Let the champs take care of you tonight." she implied while giving another smack to your ass that caused you to jump. "Stop doing that!" you barked as you turned to her. "She's right. Just for tonight." Roman repeated in your ear that sent chills down your spine.

Good chills.

You sighed while nodding slowly. Roman gently set you down in the middle of Sasha's legs as she spread on the material in front of you. "I usually do foreplay but tonight can be special." Sasha began as Roman began to remove your ring gear. "I doubt you even know what foreplay is, champ." you snickered before looking over at Roman. You were actually amazed on the gentleness the 'Tribal Chief: Head of the Table' was showing for you. When you became bare to them, Sasha couldn't help but lick her dry lips. "Put her on top of me, Roman. I know you're dying over there." Sasha says as Roman quickly set you on top of Sasha. "Shit, am I crushing you?" you asked, scared of hurting her. "Girl, I'm perfectly fine. I'd die happily behind this body." she says while gripping your jaw to face her and soon taking your lips back into hers as her hands explored your now naked body.

You noticed Roman itched closer, dangerously close to the valley of your legs that was covered with various love bites from him. He looked up at you in some sort of assurance that it was okay. You gave him a small nod since Sasha hadn't let go of your jaw. Your legs found themselves on his shoulders as Roman literally almost dragged you off of Sasha and let his tongue lick a stripe against your clit. You took Sasha out of your mouth as a loud moan slipped out. Roman gripped your hips and dragged you closer to his mouth as his tongue began ravishing you. "Fuck, Roman. Slow the fuck down!" you stammered in between moans, clearly not used to such intrusion. "I'm surprised he's not being more savage. Guess that means he likes you a lot." Sasha said her hands cupped your breast and began playing with your nipples.

You leaned your head back against Sasha's shoulder as she smirked over at your overwhelmed state. "Fuckk..." you moaned again, curling your toes as Roman's tongue felt soo damn good. Sasha hands soon went lower down your body and soon began rubbing your clit as Roman continued to eat you out. "Mpfhhhh..." you moaned while placing a fist over your mouth to hold your moans in. Nobody needed to know you guys were doing this. "You like this, huh? Letting the champs take care of you?" she teased, making you glare at her with a very annoyed side stare.

Your other hand instantly went over to Roman's head, in attempt to push him away as you approached your high. "If you don't...stop..." you merely spoke as you continuously let your champs have complete control of your body and its pleasure. "Looks like she's boutta blow, Rome." Sasha said she continued to swirl her fingers over your now overstimulated clit. After one long lick, Roman removed his mouth with a one sexy ass grin on his features. Right when were about to cum. "You guys...are no fun." you spoke breathlessly, almost pissed of not getting a long-awaited orgasm.

Sasha giggled before taking her fingers on a stripe across your pussy and bringing it her mouth. "Did you really think you were gonna cum without your champs?" she asked slyly while placing you off of her and began removing her clothes. You rolled her eyes at her comment before yet again turning your attention to Roman who went over to his bag and grabbed one singular condom.

You finally connected the dots. "You freaks planned this?!" you screeched while soon erupting in laughter. These horny 'champs' really needed a plan to seduce you? And did it by being assholes? "Laugh it up." Roman says while letting a small smile tug his lips. Sasha just rolled her eyes in embarrassment. You let Roman bring you to your knees in front of Sasha who was smirking like a jerk. "Heyyy." she teased while you were embracing her naked body.

How can someone be sexy as hell and annoying as hell? You thought

You heard a belt buckle behind you, now Roman was stripping. This caused both you and Sasha to be mesmerized by the beauty of this god-like Samoan. You just want to bite his muscles. "Jesus, your family genes are insane to me." she comments, taking in his built and muscular body. He just shrugged it off the best way he could, in reality, he was flushed that you both were attractive him.

He popped open the condom and put it on. "Ready for me, baby girl?" he asked spreading your legs wider. You inhaled sharply. You could feel him poking your thigh and fuck he feels huger than before. "I'm glad it's you and not me." she says while staring at his length in slight shock. "I'm going to be gentle." he says as he narrows his eyes at Sasha's bluntness. "No." you said that caused them both to look at you in shock. "I want it. I want you both to go nuts." you said bluntly. Your mind was truly clouded by built up lust. All that tension between these two definitely made you change your perspective on them. "Fuck, that was hot." she states while pulling your head down to her clit.

Roman didn't wait for you to react. He spread your folds and swiftly slammed himself into you harshly. He grunted and felt his body quivered from your tightness. "Fucckk, babygirl. You're tight as fuck.." he groans while thrusting into you as if you were the last fuck he'll ever have. You licked a stripe on her bare pussy before kissing her clit and sucked on her folds that coated with her slick. Sasha arched her back as she gripped your hair tightly. Roman's powerful thrusts literally pushed your body more against Sasha's.

You said you wanted them to be rough, not rough and fast.

He was quick to change his pace and sped up. The sound of both of your hips meeting was falling death within your ears as Sasha's toes curled from your tongue. "You're doing great, girly." she cooed, knowing it would make you speed your movements more. Everyone had a praise kink in some way. "Better than great." Roman added on that caused you to tighten your walls around his girth. This was a signal that you were ready to finally cum. "Not yet." he demands, you groaned in disappointment around Sasha's clit that's caused her to tighten her grip on your hair more. Roman noticed this and you earned a very harsh slap to your right asscheek. "Don't get bratty with me." he threatens.

You quickly fall in line. If this is how he is rough, you could imagine how he is brat taming, but that would be hot as hell. "Shit, I'm close." Sasha says while letting her moans come out her mouth shamelessly. You were actually glad your moans were silent, no one had to know you were here. Roman's brutal pace sped up too damn quickly, you swore he ripped something from within you. "Shit, cum. Cum right fucking now." he commanded. And so, you did. Sasha spasmed all her juices onto your tongue as Roman fixed your arch as he let himself spill into the condom.

You sighed before removing your mouth from Sasha's pussy. You looked drained; they really did a number on you. Roman pulled out and literally fell back on the floor and laid there for a good minute. Sasha looked back down at you a small smirk. Your face was coated with her essence and your salvia mixed together. She grabbed her shirt and wiped your face with it. "What now?" she asked, looking down at the man who was calming down from his high. He shrugged before fixing his hair. "How about a round two? At his hotel." you suggested that caused them both to look at you in shock again. "This time, I lead." you stated firmly, this caused Sasha to shake in excitement, she loved your dominant nature.

She nodded. "Sounds great to me." she agreed. You both looked over at the man who looked like he was gonna fall asleep. "Just give me five minutes." he said and soon fell into slumber. "Damn, I fucked him up." you said while looking over at a grinning Sasha. "Probably the best pussy he ever had." she said while dapping you up before pulling you up next to her as your sweaty bodies cuddled against each other.

This would be a long night.

credz to @/tonystarkproperty

[drdemonprince]

TV Glow was devastating. incredibly effective visually, thematically, and performance-wise. Schoenbrun has leveled up in a major way since World's Fair, which I felt like I was five years too old for, both in terms of references and from having seen too much weird shit in this life to be impressed by her version of what's "scary" online.

This movie was far more creatively ambitious and emotionally resonance -- it having a bigger budget certainly helped stretch its legs, and Schoenbrun used it to its fullest.

Justice Smith's acting made me want to cry. He shows a true reverence for the material that few cis actors would; far from viewing the character as a little exercise, he transforms into her discomfort and sadness. His little voice warbles and the way his face softens with hope at a few crucial moments made my heart break for him, knowing already that the dreams he'd barely let himself hold onto would never come true.

I can't believe an Emma Stone produced wide release movie is about transgender egg drama here in 2024. jarring for something that once felt so private and esoteric to be broadly relatable to audiences now. it's fitting, given the movie is about a mass-release TV show that a handful of tender freaks think must be about something so much more than this world would ever let it be. kind of a funny trick there.

is this a movie about depressed isolated queer people whose minds curdle around a random media property because loneliness makes the brain turn inward and eat itself? or is it the tragic tale of a woman who never realized her destiny and allowed the matrix to keep plugging her repeatedly back in?

you can read it both ways at once and it's best if you do. some equipped with fandom goggles with elect to see it only in the more fantastical light.

There are already dozens of people coming out as transgender for the first time in their lives in the Letterboxd reviews of this film, saying they recognize their repression in Owen, their egg at last busted open by this heartbreaking tale of a life unfulfillingly lived. I get it -- before I transitioned, the same thing happened to me with Casey Plett's incredible story collection, A Safe Girl to Love. There is something painfully enchanting about the forever-unrealized trans person whose suffering we imagine would be escapable if only they could admit who they are.

But what do you do when you have overcome your fear of being "crazy," left your old world behind, and passed through that veil to become the person you were always meant to be, only to find that you are still stoop-shouldered and awkward, still overlooked with your heart cut out of you, apologizing to others for your asthma in between your death rattles? What if you never get all the poison out? After you figure out you're a hero from another dimension, what will you do if you can never get back?

I find myself asking these things, as a person who used to fantasize that transitioning would solve all my problems. The imagined future transitioned me felt so distant that it was easy to push him off. And then after years passed, when I finally reached out to claim him, I discovered he was just as awkward, lonesome, insecure, and unhappy as I was, because he was just me. If i'd always been transgender, then I'd always been unhappy for deeply transgender reasons back then, too, and I'd already known a whole lot more about what it meant to be me than I'd thought that I had. Fantasies had been a seductive distraction from the world that was trying to kill me, and they suffocated me whether I denied them or if I believed in them.

This is a movie about fantasies, and the suburbs, and about being transgender. And it's bleak, but I think some who are on the cusp of making the same realizations as Owen can't fully know why yet. Life on the other side of knowing is more liveable, but I can't explain why. It didn't make things better. It wasn't the great escape I had hoped. But it did force me to confront who I was and how many monsters there always had been all around me. And that's better than living in a fantasy.

[smytherines]

I often wonder if I would feel differently about The Staircase Scene if I had seen SAF when it first came out in 2016. The first time I saw it was probably around October or November of 2023, and like... the context is different now.

Whatever we want to say about the personal story arcs of these characters (and I know I'm in a tiny minority because, for me, killing Owen does not constitute a satisfying close to Curt's arc, that's totally fine), there is the very real issue of the sociopolitical context that this scene takes place within- both in their time (1961) and in ours.

One very cool thing about SAF is that, in order to understand these characters better, a lot of younger queer folks end up learning about the Lavender Scare, about Executive Order 10450- which officially prohibited gay people from working for the US government- for the first time. That's an incredible, precious thing to me. Yay queer history! It's important!

The show itself never addresses the fact that both the US and UK governments had very public, very brutal campaigns equating homosexuality with communism with being a traitor to your country. But if you want to understand these characters, and especially write fanfiction, you're really incentivized to teach yourself some fundamentally important aspects of queer history.

In the 54 Below concert, before singing Not So Bad, Brian Rosenthal talks about how when they were developing the show they thought N@zis were more or less a thing of the past, that they're fully aware of how differently that song might be taken now after an escalation into a more open embrace of fascism in the US. And they're absolutely right about that.

But I think that's also perhaps an issue with the staircase scene, or at least it is for me. Obviously homophobia and transphobia were not "fixed" in 2016, they were still massive problems resulting in violence and discrimination and brutality. But institutionally, at least, you could look at the situation and point to some things that were gradually getting better.

In 2016 trans youth in my state were legally allowed to receive gender affirming care. In 2024, they are not. It's not that homophobia and transphobia went away and then came back, but there was a very real resurgence of the use of the media and of governmental power to inflict pain on queer & trans people and chase them out of public life- bathroom bans, gender affirming care bans, Don't Say Gay laws, trying to make drag illegal, equating queer and trans people with pedophilia. There has been a big cultural shift back towards the same kind of violent governmental moral panic that our beloved Curt & Owen would have lived under.

Whatever we want to say about these characters and this story (and there's tons of fascinating debate there), there is still the base of a gay man killing his ex-lover ostensibly to protect US foreign policy objectives. Killing the man he loves- or loved, at least- to protect the secret that he is gay. And that hits different for me now.

I watch that scene and it is heartbreaking on a personal level, but its also heartbreaking as a queer person who just wants to scream "your government will destroy you for being gay, you don't owe them shit!"

Owen tries to explain that the surveillance network is happening, that the future won't wait for Curt to catch up. Barb has been saying she's working on the same thing for the US government the entire show, but Curt just kept ignoring her. And I just want to say "Curt, honey, what do you think your government is going to do to you with that surveillance system? Do you think you're useful enough to keep around even though you have sex with men? Because I promise you they will not care."

It feels tragic to me because on some level it seems like Curt would actually be safer with another gay man having control of all the world's secrets than he will be if the government he has dedicated his life to gets their hands on that same technology.

And the thing is, having a tragic ending doesn't make the show bad. This show is great. This scene is spectacular. It makes you think, it makes you feel things, it does all the stuff that great art is supposed to do. Absolutely none of what I'm saying here is meant to denigrate the show as a musical or a story or even a queer story. I hope it doesn't come off as me saying "actually this show is bad," because I don't feel that way at all.

Clearly I live and breathe this show. That's why I spend all my time on here analyzing every scene, every frame, every facial expression. I love this show so much that I can't help but deconstruct it and look at all its component parts- including the sociopolitical context both now and in 1961. Because that context, despite never being explicitly mentioned, is important to our understanding of these characters.

I love these characters so much that it's actually pretty difficult for me to watch A2P7 anymore, because the staircase scene is so emotionally devastating to me that it's hard to try to swing back into that more comedic tone (even though Spy Dance is a certified bop).

I'm not even sure what my point is with all of this, other than to say that Spies Are Forever is a show that is great and fun and funny as written/performed, and becomes gradually more emotionally devastating when you rewatch it or when you understand the subtext of it. When you can engage with the themes of gender and sexuality, surveillance and technology, trauma and trust, and tease out even more satisfying theories around this show.

So yeah. It's a musical. It's about spies.

[violetswritingg]

Thunderstruck

Tyler Owens x OFC!

Description: When cowgirl meets cowboy after a year of no-contact and chaos ensues during storm season!

Rating: M (Mentions of blood and death in Tornadoes and storms alike, angst and loss of loved ones, car accidents, Tornado aftermath, and injury to characters, slight age gap (5 years))

Want to read the other chapters?

Click here

9

A few seconds later......

"I'm just fine, you're the one who almost had a house drop on them." His words bit at her exposed nerve endings. Filling Riley with regret for even stopping to check on him, her stomach twisting in knots.

"Right. Okay then." Riley was tired, she was hungry, but also still nauseous, her head hurt and now her chest felt tight hearing the sharp tone that had left Tyler's lips. Something so familiar but so distant in her memory. It was how he always sounded when he was upset with her for doing something dangerous.

Or, at least, stupidly dangerous.

Riley turned on her heel and made it a grand total of two steps before the sound of skin against skin and a quiet yelp made her turn back around. Witnessing Tyler, holding his shoulder, glare at the dark-haired man beside him, who had appeared out of nowhere. Having been around the back of the house-turned-debris they were poking around. The new face simply raised his brows and put his hands on his hips, coffee eyes drilling expectantly into Tyler. His ever-present smile never really leaving his face, even present now, a slight curl to them as he nodded his head in Riley's direction.

Tyler glanced her way looking like a kicked puppy, barely meeting her slightly amused-mostly shocked expression and round eyes.

"Sorry" Tyler sighed, "I didn't mean that."

"Kinda felt like you did." Riley swallowed hard, eyes squinting as the sun started to shift positions in the sky, having to raise a hand to block the rays from fully blinding her. "I'm uh- I'm gonna go." She started to walk, Tyler's voice calling after her. His boots crunching against the ground in quick strides.

"No, wait, really, I'm sorry. I'm just still pissed off about that shit with Kate-"

"It's fine Owens. You don't owe me any-" She had barely turned around, desperate for Tyler to not see the hurt she was feeling, because she had no right. But also wanted to just drop everything and apologize and fall into his arms. After her day she knew a single hug from him, if they were still in good standing with each other, would probably make her feel like it would all be okay. Truly. If even only for a couple minutes.

"Please don't call me that." Riley stopped, angled away from the blonde man, shoulders raised. Tyler's voice barely carrying, but it was enough. A lead weight dropping onto Riley's chest. "Just..." The man looked around for a second, "This isn't your fault ya know?" Tyler's abrupt change, turning it on her, shouldn't have thrown her. Not after her experience with it firsthand. But she is.

"Easy for you to say," She sputtered, "It's easy for you, all you do is run around and shoot fireworks up into tornados or god knows whatever else your followers ask you to do next. But for me?" She should stop, She knew that, but once she had started it was like a single crack had suddenly blown open and the dam was crumbling more and more with every word that left her mouth unfiltered, "Every time I fail, it's a town that's hit. Family homes ripped from the ground. Torn to shreds. Parents without kids and kids without parents. So, thank you for saying that, but it is. I could have prevented this Tyler. I could have." She didn't know who she was begging to believe her. Him or herself. "But I fucked up. As per usual."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Tyler scoffed, eye wide as he stared her down, hating how Riley's face dropped, her eyes losing any spark they had, but confused more than anything. She couldn't think-

"I'm not my dad. He was always so good at this, I'm sure he'd have it all figured out by now." Riley shrugged, small, pitiful little bubbles of semi-laughter popped up and out of her lips as she shook her head. Gaze eventually falling to her feet as her arms wrapped around her stomach.

She looked so small.

"Maybe..." Tyler started off gently, "but you can't know that. And I'm sorry, but have you met you? You are exactly like him, in a good way." Tyler points at her quickly as she went to open her mouth. "You are not a fuck up Riley. You're working harder than any other chaser I know to actually find answers, help people. But Jesus Christ Riley," He chuckled, beside himself, worry glazing over his eyes, "when is it going to be enough? You almost let yourself get crushed by a house! A couple hours ago! And then you just walked away like it was no big deal." Tyler couldn't stop more incredulous laughter from tumbling past his lips like missiles aiming right at her open wounds.

"So that a family could lay one of its members to rest intact!" Riley bit, chewing through every word. Nails digging into her palms.

The word hit him like a punch to the gut and flashes of that moment. Seeing Nathan's body, Riley sobbing under his weight and covered in her fathers blood. The woman, now grown, in front of him and lacking the rust-colored stains as the one in his memory.

"Ty, I'm sorry-" She wanted to kick herself. Screaming why?! Over and over and over. Tyler didn't let her finish though. Riley taking a step back at the shift in his posture, his shoulders slumping forward as his jaw dropped, quick breaths puffing in and out of his lungs.

"What about you? Is it me that's going to have to pull your body out of a house so I can bury you intact? Like I pulled you out of that truck?"

It felt like she had been dealt a physical blow, the way all the air left her body, as if punched in the stomach. That's what she would equate it to. That sounded right. Shit. Her eyes started to burn, still locked on Tyler's now wide-open orbs. His own shock painted so clearly in the blue-green waves, followed by guilt, and lastly, panic.

For the first time in a very long while, she was met with the familiar feeling of losing something she didn't think she ever would. But that was her fault, as per usual. It was all her fault.

"Riley-"

"Ri, there you are. I have been looking everywhere for you!" Riley was broken out of the fog she didn't even realize she had fallen into by the sudden jolt of a hand clapping her on the shoulder. Shaking her gently a bit before pulling her into his side.

"Daniel." She muttered, leaning more into his hold as exhaustion swept over her like a storm cloud on an April day in Oklahoma. Knees feeling like Jello all of a sudden.

"Hey there boss lady, we need your help with something." His arm over her shoulder anchored her, her hand coming up to grab his as he started to shift them away from the blonde man who looked like he was about to lose his mind.

"Wait- we were in the middle of something. Riley, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it- Not like that-"

Tyler stops in his tracks, having followed behind a couple step without hesitation, as Daniel whipped his head around with a far nastier glare than Tyler ever though such a baby face could make. His breaths felt heavy in his chest, Pulling away from Boone as he felt hands on his shoulder and back. Dragging a hand down his mouth and shaking his head as he could only watch Daniel take Riley away.

"We were worried you had found yourself buried under some other little old ladies house, Sarah, Jenny, and I at least." His voice was gentle, but still joking. Trying to bring the old Riley back, the one who would hang out the Warlock's window in the middle of a storm. Their Riley. Their fearless leader and most looked up to person. Their hero. "You're welcome for the assist, by the way. I take payment in affection and head pats." The 20-year-old grinned down at Riley and the slightly older young adult shook her head. Slowly coming back to herself. Her grin practiced, not meeting her eyes, having almost perfected it after pushing herself to meet their expectations – everyone's expectations – for years.

"Can it Casanova, save it for girls your own age." Riley could see the pure relief sink into Daniel's face and her head ached.

"What if I don't like girls my own age? What if I don't like girls?" He grinned brightly, still supporting her but bouncing up and down as best he could.

"Then why you looking at me like that, huh?" Riley elbowed his side a bit, wincing when her body ached, her side stinging at the movement.

"This is just how I look at people Riley. What are you talking about?"

"You are really pushing your luck kid."

"Ooh. It hurts, I may never recover!" He pretended to sputter and keel over, almost taking Riley with him. Daniel trying to keep his laughter at bay, conscious of their surroundings even when goofing off. While Riley forced hers to cover the shot of pain that went through her side at the sudden jolt.

"Good."

Daniel gasped and clapped a hand over his chest as he straightened up. Riley audibly groaning and gripping her side as he pulled her up with him.

"Sorry!"

~~*~~

“Thanks Sam.” Riley grunted as she tried not to flinch away from the feel of the needle going through skin. Fixing her ripped stitch. “You’re a lifesaver, knew it was a good decision to bring on a med student.”

“Ex-Pre-med student. You’re just lucky I watched way too much youtube way too early on in life with no parental controls in place.” Sam finished off the stitch and pressed a clean bandage over the area gently. Dead silence filling the room as three sets of eyes drilled into his head.

“I’m sorry what?” Riley breathed through clenched teeth.

“You said you knew how!” Sarah gasped, “You said-”

“I said I knew how, you never asked from where!” Sam defended himself, taking off his gloves and throwing his hands up.

“I thought it was obvious why I was asking you! The med student!”

“I was pre-med. For like six months!”

“Oh my god.” Riley muttered, falling back onto the motel mattress, her shirt falling back down as she threw her arm over her eyes.

“We trusted you!” Daniel chimed in, definitely not as angry as he was pretending to be. If anything, just based on his voice alone Riley could tell he was holding back laughter and she couldn’t help but think this was an incredibly stupid thing to be experiencing right now. And so she started laughing.

Then Daniel cracked, which triggered Sam, Sarah being the last to break. Actors.

~~*~~

It had been a couple hours since the whole youtube doctor incident, Daniel and Sam made pretty quick exits once it was confirmed she wasn’t going to die. Sarah stuck around a little longer, flouncing around the way she does when she’s worried and didn’t want to leave Riley alone.

The blonde managed to convince the brunette she was fine and was probably going to turn in early. No storms on radar, not ones that looked like they would produce anything till late tomorrow at the earliest. If not dissipate before anything could even really happen. Tomorrow would most likely be just a inventory and restock day. A day for data analysis and writing a couple more chapters of her thesis that needed to be turned in by the end of next week.

Riley’s mood had slightly increased but she still couldn’t seem to shake the lingering feeling of Tyler’s words. How they clung to her skin and ridges of her brain, the hurt. It brought up a lot of other unresolved feelings that then made her restless.

Trying to turn on the Tv for some white noise didn’t even help like it normally did, not when it was immediately on a local news channel. The broadcast showing footage from the wreckage at Crystal Lake. She knew it was torture to make herself watch it when she spent all day in it, having only washed it off her skin and hair before Sam fixed her stitches. But the feeling of debris dust and dirt and dried blood would always be a sensation that would never leave her mind or her skin. Lingering guilt hanging like a sword.

What is the saying? Heavy is the head that lies the crown.

All the damage played out in front of her as dollar signs flashed at the top, how much can an estimation of the face value even really touch the priceless thing those people had just lost? The feeling of home. Everything they once had, shattered. It can’t be tallied. It’s impossible.

But they still try. It’s absurd.

Quiet knocks at her door cut through the Tv. Riley rolling her eyes and huffing, pushing herself off the mattress slowly, “I’m fine Sarah! You don’t need to tuck me in,” Her hand gripped the door handle, pulling it open, “I’m a big girl I-”

“Hey.” Tyler really tried to tamper down his grin, but he knew he was caught. He never could hide from her.

His laughter wasn’t out loud, but she could see it, and it made her want to shrivel up and die on the spot. Honestly hoping for a hole to open in the ground and swallow her whole. They were in the wrong state for that unfortunately.

“I uh- I heard through the grape vine you and your child army had moved out by the rodeo, and I uh thought you might be hungry. You always forget to eat after a bad chase…” Tyler kept going until it was almost physically painful, until he simply, awkwardly, held up the pizza box in his grip. Like a kid giving his first ever date to the school dance her corsage. It was like a shock to her system, how disarmed she could be for him when he was like this. No bravado, no smirk or cowboy hat. Hair a little messy and not all put together. When he was Ty.

Time to go. Is what her brain was screaming at her.

So she took the pizza, gave him a flash of what she hope passed as a grin and shut the door. His face turning down at every corner as the door clicked in place. Riley, as if made of metal walked over to her bed, sat down, opened the pizza, and looked down.

Pepperoni, sausage, and olives. Her favorite.

Fuck.

Her hands were finding the door before she could really think about what she was doing. Her eyes meeting Tyler’s in an instant, the man’s shoulders rolling back as he stood taller. At attention, waiting for her next move.

Riley opened the door a bit more, leaning on it, hand gently placed over her right side, “Find the dog?” she asked softly, head leaning against the door now as well.

He just looked at her, eyebrows raising.

“Of course you did, what am I thinking?” She answers her own question with a pitiful chuckle. Head dipping down as her eyes went to her socked feet.

“I’m sorry Riley. I feel like I’m saying that a lot lately, I just- there isn’t really an excuse for it. I’ve been an ass, and I apologize.” Tyler burst out after taking a breath, dipping his head down to try and meet Riley’s eye. He hated when she was like this, especially when she was like this because in part of something he said.

“Thank you.”

“How are you doing after all that?” Tyler swallowed, tucking his chin a bit and stuffing his hands in his pockets. Leaning against the door frame, but giving Riley her space. Mentally telling himself to pull it together.

Riley just shrugged, “You know me, can handle the storm but never the aftermath.” Not after becoming the aftermath. It was never the same after that.

“I thought that you might want to see something good after all that today.” He held out his hand. “I wanna take you somewhere, might help take your mind off things for a bit.” His grin was hopeful, but cautious. His gaze soft.

Earlier had been bad, as bad as it gets with them, but this feeling. That look. It always left her stomach filled with proverbial butterflies, made her think that as long as Tyler Owens cared about her enough to look at her like that, that everything would be okay. And it would be, because he would make it okay, because he cared.

It was a look she didn’t think he would ever give her again after last chase seasons dramatic, heartbreaking close. So, she takes his hand, gives it a quick squeeze. He turned it over and sees the blistering and cuts that dotted her palms. Wounds she hadn’t even realized were there until they got to the new motel. Her breath got caught in her throat and she pulled away out of instinct. Tyler looked crushed and that was just too much for her conscience to bear. Her mouth moves before she knows it is. 

“Give me a minute? I need to get changed.”

“Yeah. Yeah. I’ll be out here.” Tyler grinned, a slight bounce in his step as he backed away from the doorway and moved back to the railing surrounding the walkway around the second floor looking into the parking lot and across the street. Riley waiting till the door was closed to let her smile slip, something feeling like it was sliding back into place and locking in. Like she had finally found the next correct piece of a jigsaw puzzle.

It was a nice feeling. Like something was going right for once.

~~*~~

[rowinablx]

Summary: Shaw kidnaps Beck and Natalie raises hell

@axelwolf8109 @taechnology777 @jackiequick @epickiya722 @greek-freak101

Nat glared at Owen Shaw, arms crossed. Brian grabbed her shoulder in comfort. "This was too easy" She muttered.

"Letty" Brian said softly. The woman looked at him. "I know you don't remember this but I'm sorry-" "It's okay" Letty said gently.

"I know, and I can tell you that I wouldn't have done that if anyone told me too"

Nat smiled. "I'm sorry I threw you down stairs" Letty said. Nat laughed. "It's fine"

Owen looked smug. "This isn't over" "It is you asshole" Han said. "You think you won? Because I'm arrested"

"You're the one in cuffs" Tej scoffed. "I don't think this is gonna go the way you think" Owen smirked. "Have you heard from Little O'Connor?"

Nat's body went cold and she scrambled for her phone. Brian looked at Dom, the older man looked numb.

"Beck?" Nat choked out. "Natalie! Brian! Fuck!""

Brian punched Owen in the jaw, Nat had to be held back from joining in. "You're letting him go or I will fucking kill you!"

"We wanted the sister but he got them out and practically threw himself at us" Owen laughed. Nat slapped him across the face. "Shut the fuck up!"

"Let us go and we'll let him go" "No" The general said. "One man is not worth setting free a terrorist"

Brian pulled out his gun and pointed it at him. "Let him go or I'll shoot, I have nothing to lose" Nat stood in front of her brother in law.

Surprisingly, Hobbs aimed his own at the general. "Do it" He ordered. The soldiers did so. "Are you coming baby?" Owen looked at Letty, but instead Riley smirked. "Of course"

"You fucking bitch" Nat swore. Brian grabbed her arm. "He won't let Beck out, we have to get him back ourselves"

"All you have are cars" Hobbs said. "We literally stole millions of dollars with almost nothing but cars" Brian smirked. Nat shrugged.

------

Brian hit Riley with his car when he drove into the plane, Nat drop kicked someone else down. "Beck!" She yelled.

"Let's go!" Hobbs ran. Brian and Nat ran through the plane, spotting Shaw. Nat pushed down a cabinet, giving Beck a chance to headbutt his captors and run.

Shaw attacked Brian, shoving him into a wall and dazing him. "I almost wish you were in the crash instead of Letty, you're so pretty"

Beck ran back at the sound of Brian's cry of pain. Shaw raised a wench, Dom grabbed Nat and spun her around, she kicked Shaw in the face and immediately ran to Brian. "Go!" He yelled. Nat helped Brian up and ran to Beck.

Beck hugged her tightly, kissing her all over. "Are you okay?" He pulled away. "You were just kidnapped to be used as blackmail and you're worried about me?"

"I don't care what happens to me" "Well I do!" Nat kissed him. "This is adorable but we gotta go" Brian said. Klaus blocked them. "Oh you got to shitting me" Brian growled.

Beck attacked Klaus' legs while Brian went after his chest. Nat assigned herself to hit wherever she could kick or hit.

Letty found a spear gun and aimed it at Riley. "Wrong team bitch" Hobbs nodded in agreement, Letty fired and Riley was speared through her stomach and sent flying

"Let's go!" Nat entered the nearest car. "Dom!" Brian yelled. "Go!" Dom ordered. Brian cussed but obeyed. Nat pull away just before the plane fully took off. They landed roughly, Beck groaning.

"Remind me to never piss you off again honey" Nat grinned and exited, Brian limped out behind her. The plane crashed, nearly exploding, but Dom wasn't even slightly hurt.

"How?" Hobbs was dumbfounded. Dom shrugged and just hugged Brian. Beck kissed Nat, spinning her around in his arms.

The crew was finally free

[thatiranianphantom]

Nancy Drew 1x16: The Haunting of Nancy Drew

(or the one where my ethical issues with private infant adoption get REAL)

Okay, we know you're into the supernatural Nancy, but you mean you'd vomit an omen anyday?

A blessed break from Owen in this episode!

I need a makeup routine for all three girls. Immediately.

John Sander is the BEST. The true "normal person comes to crazy town" trope.

"Made that out of clay." Ace, sweet baby, ily.

How did Nancy get those case files, especially with Tamura?

Ah, asking her mother for help without knowing it!

Also, "did my mom have something to do with Lucy's death". Double meaning there.

God, baby Fanson. I love them.

The thing is before Nace were ever a thing, Fanson was great. I don't root for Fanson because of Nace, I root for Fanson on its own merits, while I hated Nancy and Nick as a couple.

Don't panic. Everyone: panics.

Tamura! I loved him.

"Is he a vampire?"

Ace can hack in 2 minutes, and should absolutely have been snapped up by some kind of government agency at this point.

Another theme for this episode: poor, poor Ryan. The face acting Riley does in this episode! His father made the love of his life kill herself, and he has to deal with the fact that she died thinking Ryan hated her.

People remember the events of 20 years ago with startling clarity.

Do Americans call pickles gherkins? Thought that was a British thing?

Lucy, someone who was at least 16, has the journal of a 5 year old.

Again, gonna put it out there that the people who ensured Lucy's death, a pregnant child, were the people of Horseshoe Bay. Don't know if I'd defend them hard if I were Carson.

Excellent casting, because I do see Lucy's facial features in Nancy.

Hoo boy, here we go. Let's start this with a disclaimer: I know that the internet is where nuance goes to die, but I want to make it clear I am not anti-adoption. I also fully recognize that many birth mothers, through their own free choice and zero coersion, choose to place their babies for adoption, and even if they had access to resources, this is the choice they would make. I am not calling that unethical. I'm also aware I am applying my own personal ethical issues with adoption to a fictional TV show. Okay, we good? Okay, let's get into it.

Lucy Sable was a (presumably) 16 year old child who had been relentlessly bullied into an incredibly emotional state, had just given birth, and had thought the love of her life hated her and never wanted to see her again. This is not a person in a clear emotional state, capable of making long-term decisions. I get that they absolutely did not know that Lucy would jump off the cliff, but Carson justifying everything with "Lucy wanted this. This was Lucy's wish. We didn't tell the Hudsons because Lucy wanted this" is somewhat understandable but frankly also a load of shit.

Lucy did not know the truth. Ryan deserved to know the truth. Nancy deserved to know the truth. I find it very hard to accept that Carson and Kate were "honoring Lucy's wishes" by never telling her (and never planning on telling her) that she was adopted, and never telling Ryan, robbing him of the opportunity to raise Nancy, or even to know Nancy. I get that Everett couldn't know. That does not mean Ryan couldn't, and that does not mean Nancy couldn't, especially as an adult, and the thing is, Carson gaslit her the entire season and would have continued to lie to Nancy if she hadn't figured out the truth on her own.

A whole whack of Nancy's identity issues are thanks to Carson and Kate, who refused to tell Nancy who she really was. Adopted children deserve to know, and know about, their birth families. It is very easy, as we have seen, to use a teenager's tragic and highly emotional situation for their own benefits. So Carson trying constantly to justify himself as having done the right thing is...that's hard to get over.

While I absolutely believe love makes family too, biology is an interwoven part of who a person is, and never acknowledging the birth parent or family as part of an adoptee's story is...harmful to say the least.

I know Nancy and Ryan forgave Carson, but that's always going to stick at the back of my mind. Yes, Nancy was his. He was her father. I get that, and I know that was real in Nancy's mind too. She was also Lucy's. And she was Ryan's. And his refusal to acknowledge that is....ehh.

I suppose we'll get more ranting next episode, but that's the core of it.

[mhaccunoval]

beloveddddd [gently cups your face in my hands] tell me about CIFL <3

HI BELOVED <333

your ticket of admission is a kiss on the forehead <3 as i try to remember what developments have been made since i last talked about it on here...

mmm!!! one that's been haunting me lately (i probably won't actually get around to writing it so i'll share it here): i've been thinking about. well it's an intersection of inspiration from mawce by everybody's worried about owen and a troubled mind by noah kahan but. 22/23 year old maggie (pre-transition donny) going to eli (pre-transition ellie)'s college town— based on the a troubled mind lyrics 'i took a bus out to the city where you live / eaves dropped on strangers' conversations with their kids / in hopes that maybe they'd say something relevant / to ease my worried head'— while in a Weird Headspace (even a manic episode, but more on That later). doesn't get a whole hell of a lot out of it, other than more of The Weird Headspace, especially if (he) sees someone who looks vaguely like eli and/or gets spooked by any deep water around (another point to be elaborated). while somewhat Dissociated in the headspace, makes (his) way down to boston, then to new york, has a mini break in a new york hotel room including shaving (his) head. DOES, then, get home safely and shows up at the hurleys' door— the specificity of new york being important because the shaving of the head leads to (his) hat era and the hat (he) got first says NY on it. marian, god bless her, is a bit shocked at first but. she loves (him) like her own so she fixes the rough/uneven patches of hair, makes sure (he's) well-fed/comfortable, defends (him) when Joseph gets a bit prickly about the whole situation (I HAD ACTUAL DIALOGUE BUT I FORGOR; anyway, i'll elaborate on the prickle AS WELL). lets M— who does want to temporarily go by M since part of the break is gender shit— vent where (he) needs to. and. the part i'm gnawing on the most is, in the morning M's like 'hi annie...' and marian's like 'hi peach :)' because!!! dat baby's a fuzzy little peach right now!!! and. and. joseph, coming to made Some acceptance with the situation, puts a ballcap of his on M's head, probably a chicago cubs cap or something...

ELABORATION 1.) usage of 'manic episode' as i always do, i use the phrasing with careful consideration just because. i know it's not verbage to just throw around. and i use it apprehensively here just because i STILL have not determined whether donny is more bipolar or BPD, but i AM leaning BPD more so. probably in part because of pieces of him that are so very me. but i am also NOT ruling out the possibility just because in some scenes in my head, i can see things that could be a manic or could be a depressive episode. POINT BEING I'M STILL DOING MY RESEARCH AND I'M DOING MY RESEARCH AT ALL, I SWEAR.

ELABORATION 2.) fear of deep water something i really need to do is note all the music inspired lore, particularly the noah kahan inspired stuff. ANYHOW. noah's song fear of water inspired the lore that donny's scared of deep dark water, like any dark parts of lake michigan and for sure the ocean. the other side of the coin (because of course it's a coin) being that ellie was a swimmer in middle school / high school after getting over her own fear of water (inspired by 'you used to be scared of the water / you're safe by the side of your father' from glue myself shut). –– E2a.) naturally, there's a scene in my head related to all of this. in The Awkward Period after ellie moves back— another point for elaboration— what really ends the tension, besides hashing it out, is ellie making him face that fear of the water. not quite fear immersion with, like, going into the depths of the ocean, but taking a dunk in the lake, even against donny's better judgment. and grumbling about it just because it doesn't FULLY reduce the anxiety (just staves it) but he also can't fully complain because if following her word means he's regained some of ellie's trust and bond, then by god he'll do it

ELABORATION 3.) joseph prickliness it prickles me to forget the dialogue i had BUT the main subtext behind it is. prior to donny's transition, he's seen like a daughter to both of the hurley parents, so in some part joseph's always prickly about that, not because he doesn't Want a daughter but because he doesn't know how to have one (not that he knows much about having a son or a kid in general, between him & annie having ellie young-er AND his personality). and it's something he admits to ellie after She's transitioned, saying that he Still doesn't know how to have a daughter. BUT at least he's made an effort in both cases and continues to make an effort for his Blood daughter

ELABORATION 4.) The Awkward Period the awkward period is ALSO music inspired but it's more a conglomerate than anything. like the major components are two song inspired scenes i'll explain in a second but. the general notion with The Awkward Period is that it's a span of a couple months after ellie gets back where things are, well, Awkward. she's trying to handle her grief and readjust to being back home (after four years in vermont, four years in philadelphia) with whatever weird grudge she doesn't understand being held by donny as a cherry on top. and donny's still sifting through said grudge, still compartmentalizing his anger. so it's a lot of tension filled stares and cutting words for a minute –– E4a.) the major component is the Funeral stuff inspired by orange juice... which is particularly the first/last verse with the placing of the setting as a party. in my head it's the wake, everyone choosing to drown their sorrows are drinking, cue joseph & ellie in the kitchen, with donny walking in; the tension is thick as donny and ellie look at each other, and ellie, out of sheer politeness, wants to suggest that there's stuff to mix a drink with. only for joseph to interject that there's orange juice in the fridge for non-alcoholic drinking, which confuses ellie slightly but only because she doesn't know that donny's the lyric of 'and i haven't drank in six months / on the dot'. which does irk donny a bit more in stewing since that means his sobriety is yet Another piece of information that's been withheld from her / that she doesn't know and therefore another piece of him that she hasn't known –– E4b.) the other major component is the hashing out scene. which also has some orange juice inspiration but is mainly homesick (and even a hint of new perspective)... so Given homesick, it's set like two months after the funeral, donny coming over to the hurley (now just joseph's) residence to Try to make some amends, at least lure ellie out to talk some, in the VERY least go on a walk. tries to talk a bit, though superficially, about things she's missed while away, but that sours quickly. sours quickly because it easily falters into orange juice's talking of waiting so long for a homecoming that there wasn't a thought to ask where they had gone (but now asking Why they had gone). and more importantly into the fact of '[doesn't ellie] find it strange that [she] just went ahead and carried on? ... the last time [donny] drank [he] was face down passed out there in [her parents'] yard / are [they] all just crows to [her] now? / are [they] all just pulling [her] down?' WHICH. is where it turns into a hashing out because ellie bites back with the fact that her heart and her soul, more importantly her life, have changed— even the city had changed, but Somehow donny had not. and all of this continues the awkwardness and tension since now they've rubbed salt into each other's wounds, as much as they needed to hear what the other had to say (as general fact And for communication's sake)

because of being on my orange juice insanity, i'm thinking about 'you didn't put those bones in the ground' in relation to how it's worked into the story. and i forgot about 'now i'm third in the line-up to your lord and your savior'... BUT I'VE ALREADY SAID TOO MUCH IN ONE SITTING AS IS (and i haven't even touched other parts of the stick season album, like northern attitude and all my love, or anything else noah-turned-inspiration)... but do tell me if you want more insanity <3 i am willing and able to offer <3

[wrens-garden]

Outsider, Owen POV episode 14

recap of episode 13 - brought to you by Rasbi I believe

I like looking through the comments after watching to see other people opinions, and to see if I missed something, why are people asking shit that was answered in the previous episode. They're asking about Oeca's trial when the previous episode was about that, Jesus I feel like I'm gonna go insane. Anyway

Mohwee seems angry that only Oeca was being accused of murder. He says Ori, Gracie and Oeca left him to die

he's been in the maze for 100 days

Mohwee is properly pissed. He doesn't think anyone deserves to know what happened in the maze

Mohwee is leaving with Oeca, probably to talk. I knew Oeca didn't kill him, and he doesn't seem as angry with Oeca as he is with the other two.

Rasbi is now coming to Oeca's defence, so something obviously happened there, since she seemed quite sure when Mohwee first disappeared that Oeca killed him

Someone has destroyed Oeca's house, kinda cruel, especially if it's been 100 days

Ori threw a weapon at Oeca, and has apparently been doing things to Red's house, that makes me think he put the 'you're next' in Red's walls

Oeca was afraid someone would kill him before his trial. Mohwee and Oeca have gone to Oeca's corner, that just sounds so sad

Mohwee blames Rasbi as well, I can't tell if Oeca does too

Owen's gone to talk to Oeca and Mohwee, it was Mohwee in the maze that night Owen went in

Mohwee is telling Adrien, Ori, Owen and Gracie what happened

Mowhee doesn't want to go back in, doesn't think anyone should go into the maze. He's insistent that anyone who goes in will die

Section 1 and Section 2, possibly more. He mostly stayed in section 1, section 2 isn't a maze as far as he's aware, he is scared of section 2

Oeca has made a great point that having little group meetings instead of a large one leaves some people without information, because no one tends to spread the information to the others

leadership talk. Wonderful

general opinions

Oeca - my boy is truly innocent, I always thought it, but you know. Also, how old is he canonically because general vibes make me think teen. Also, he must have been so lonely, everyone was treating him like a criminal

Owen - is it just me or is Owen contradicting himself, I get it he won't remember everything he says, but I'm almost 100% sure he did fully think Oeca killed Mowhee and treated his accordingly. However, out of everyone him, Gracie and Adrien would make pretty good leaders

Mohwee - he is coming off as traumatized and honestly that makes sense. He was also very angry, which also makes sense. Also, I can't quite tell yet, but the bond with Oeca is very brotherly

Ori - I'm not sure if it's just because I have a slight bias for Oeca and Oeca said it first, but he is making me suspicious

Rasbi - I have mixed feelings, she's definitely a good person, but I can't believe she didn't think Oeca killed Mowhee, she said it herself. But she seems insistent that she no longer thinks that, so I'll give her the benefit of the doubt.

Theories - I had one, but I can't remember it. This is gonna bug me so much

[nolanhollogay]

“i feel like i’m losing you.”

gale being winedrunk and angsting about her tumultuous relationship with her son? more likely than you think

+

Tate wasn't entirely sure why he got invited to a frat's karaoke night, seeing as neither he nor Chad were affiliated with them, but he wasn't going to complain. It was nice to get off campus for once, and even though his hands were still shaking with nerves because his paranoia would never let him fully enjoy himself, he was having fun. Chad had dedicated a raunchy Bruno Mars song to him, he hadn't been laughed off the stage as he sang Bidi Bidi Bom Bom, some guy named Owen was butchering an Adele song. All in all, it was a pretty good night.

Chad was next to him, not so sneakily stealing sips of his drink, hand warm as it sat on the inside of his thigh.

Tate grabbed his hand, locking their fingers together. "Which of these guys do you know again?"

Chad drank his own beer and grimaced at the taste. "Kyle G. The Indian guy with the glasses, and the.. you know, the Muppet face. We have Women's Lit together. We share notes."

"And how many Kyles are there in this frat?" he teased.

Chad's response was drowned out by Tate's phone ringing on the table. They both froze, and Chad gripped his hand tighter.

"Why do y'all look like you seen a ghost?" One of the frat bros, his name started with a D, asked.

Another one of them, Marty, smacked his shoulder. "They're from Woodsboro, dude."

"Oh shit," D replied, as breathless as Tate felt.

The caller ID said it was Tate's mom, which only made the sinking feeling in his stomach worse.

Chad scooped it up. "I got it."

"Chad," Tate warned, but before he could say anything else, Chad was swiping to accept the call.

"Hello?" he said, and the whole table waited with baited breath as the other person responded. "No, uh, he's, he's right here. Yeah, right next to me. Yeah, he's alright," Chad turned to look at him, whispering, "It's your mom, and she's crying?"

Confusion flooded his nervous system, fitting in right alongside the fear. "What?"

Chad handed the phone over, albeit reluctantly, and watched Tate press it to his ear.

She was in fact crying, quiet sobs and sniffles filling his left ear. "Tate, is that you?"

He'd never seen her cry, or heard it, for that matter. Some part of him kind of assumed she just couldn't. It made his stomach hurt, just the sound of it. "Yeah, mom. Is everything okay?"

That sent her into another fit of tears and Tate felt nauseous. The audience wasn't helping. The frat bros were watching him like he was prime time entertainment. It made his skin crawl.

He met Chad's eyes. "Come with me to the bathroom." He had scoped it out when they first arrived after making sure he knew for certain where all the possible exits were. There was a window that'd be pretty easy to get out of if it came down to it. And it'd be somewhat private.

Chad got up without another word, still holding his hand, and let him lead the way.

-

Once they were in the bathroom, Tate interrupted his mother's cries. "Mom, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

She blubbered, exclaiming, "It's my fault!" and he could feel bile in the back of his throat.

Chad rubbed his back, sending him a frown, his eyebrows creased in worry.

"Mom?" Tate asked, voice coming out small. "Mommy," he muttered, sounding so young that it frightened him for a second, "You need to tell me what's wrong because you're freaking me the fuck out. Are you okay? Where's Brooks?"

"He's asleep. I'm okay. I'm in your bed. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for calling," The waterworks started again, "Sorry for freaking you out. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Tater Tot."

The nickname knocked him down like a gust of wind and he pressed his forehead to Chad's shoulder. The last two people to call him that were his dad, and then Amber. Hearing it was like being stabbed all over again.

"Mom," Tate breathed. "What do you want?"

"I feel like I'm losing you." It was an admission that he wasn't sure what to do with. "I lost Dewey and I know it's my fault, the fact that you don't like me, but I don't want to lose you too. I can't, Tate, I can't."

Sounding far away, he heard Brooks in the background. "Gale, what are you doing in here, babe?"

A moment later, he could hear the phone being taken from her, despite her protests, and then Brooks was in his ear. "Sorry, Tate. She had a lot to drink tonight. She probably won't even remember this in the morning."

And wasn't that the story of his fucking life?

"I'm gonna put her to bed. You have a nice night, alright? Tell Chad I say hi," Brooks said, before he hung up.

Chad's hand was tracing shapes on Tate's back under his sweatshirt. "That was.. a lot."

Tate snorted, "Yeah. Brooks says hi."

"You wanna talk about it?"

He shook his head. "Not right now. I'm sure the bros think we've been gutted and hung by our entrails by now–"

"Dark."

"–We should get back."

Chad didn't look pleased, but he didn't argue. "Okay. Can you get another peach crush so I can have it?"

Tate rolled his eyes, but let himself be pulled from the bathroom. "Buy your own drinks!"

[figula]

im having trouble lately articulating what ...im having trouble with :/ in some online leftist spheres, i think it's a combination of the following uncomfortable + contradictory concepts ive been trying to figure out

marginalised groups/oppressed groups should be listened to + have their voices amplified

marginalised/oppressed people are not inherently "correct" or more radical by dint of being part of an oppressed group (e.g. candice owens, blaire white) + people from marginalised groups can have deeply damaging opinions on other marginalised groups and sometimes even on their own group (how many times have we seen other women behaving in the most patriarchal way fex)

not all people from the same group think in the same way - this feels like an obvious point but when you're being told 5 different things by the same marginalised group it seems pretty obvious that you're going to have to come to your own conclusions regardless of how much you are listening!

i don't like the tendency to focus on differences rather than ways in which we can find common ground

on a similar note, i don't like being policed so intensely by people who seem to have more interest in being the most morally righteous person on earth instead of actually causing no harm + being a net force for positive change like i have this uncharitable thought that a lot of people who engage in this kind of behaviour were probably not the cool kids in their earlier lives + have found some kind of grift that allows them to experience that kind of soft power + well, they like it lol. like so many people whose politics align with mine almost fully are just deeply, deeply unpleasant to be around bc they are actually shit at being good people at a very basic boring level. like The Revolution or whatever will not be debates on Marx

[smytherines]

Fuck it, here's an Agent Mega dissertation

Alright since I have such elaborate headcanon for my beloved precious Owen Carvour, I guess I should do it for Agent Curt Mega too. Sigh.

So, going off of the last big one, if Owen is born in 1928, then I'm gonna say Curt was born in 1930. I'm forever won to the Texan agent mega headcanon, but I think it's safe to say that Mrs. Mega is not from Texas, probably more like New York or I've seen people say New Jersey.

We know nothing about Agent Mega's dad, but I imagine he was kind of a loser and low level con artist and moved his pregnant wife down to Texas to do scams around the bustling oil industry, and then soon after Curt was born a scam collapsed and he ran off. It's either that or an Aladdin 3 situation where he was secretly a spy the whole time and had to go into hiding.

So we've got mama Mega, raising a VERY hyperactive (read: ADHD) little boy on her own, in a place where she doesn't have any support, and he just becomes her entire world. But she has to work a lot, so Curt becomes used to taking care of himself, and most importantly- keeping himself busy so he doesn't lose it.

In this headcanon Curt would only be 15 when WWII ends- not old enough to fight, but definitely old enough to have personally known a lot of kids from his hometown who come home in caskets. I just truly think of WWII as a formative experience for both these guys. For Curt it just feeds into that inferiority complex.

Now anybody who has ADHD knows that you already spend a lot of your life feeling inadequate, feeling self-conscious about not being able to be the person other people want you to be (*especially* if you're queer). You get defensive, especially when criticized. You also get restless.

I headcanon Curt as growing up in Abilene, Texas, mostly because I have a friend who grew up there and I've visited and the vibe is right.

I don't know if anybody has ever seen The Last Picture Show, but its a film set in small town Texas in 1951-1952 (so a little late for our timeline but still) and it's (more or less) about two high school seniors essentially trying to escape this suffocatingly small, dying town before they become doomed to spend their lives trapped there.

That's definitely what I think about Agent Mega too- this gay, ADHD teenage boy climbing the walls of this little town, never being able to fully be himself. But he's got a lot of energy (and more than a little anger) to burn off, so he does sports. It's Texas, so football for sure. Maybe wrestling too. Perhaps wrestling is even where he has his gay come to jesus moment.

And when he isn't doing sports, he's home, alone (mama Mega is working so hard), out back drinking a beer (or two, or three) and teaching himself how to shoot. I think he becomes hyperfixated on becoming an expert marksman, because with all of this shit he cannot control, all the stuff he is supposed to be but isn't, this is one area where it feels like he has the power here.

What starts off as "kid drinking beer to feel cool and rebellious" starts to morph into a lifetime dependence on alcohol. Substance use is a big issue for a lot of ADHDers for the same reason I think it would be for Curt- it calms him down. It eases that constant restlessness in his bones. It softens the edges of other people's criticisms of him. It makes him care a bit less what others think about him.

In a vicious cycle, he drinks to avoid feeling those big feelings (especially as a man, especially as a gay man, especially as a gay man in Texas), but the drinking leads to more criticism, which leads to more drinking to numb the emotional response to that criticism.

But his hyperfixation on learning to shoot pays off. Let's say he becomes a junior state champion trapshooter (did I look up trapshooting competitions from the 1940s? yes I did). He's good, especially when he hits the sweet spot of drinking just enough to calm his ass down but not so much that he's useless. Maybe this is how he comes to the attention of the A.S.S.

And he fully believes that these skills he cultivated, the ability to hit hard and run fast and shoot accurately, his ability to escape when it doesn't feel remotely possible, is why many years later he just kinda rolls his eyes at Owen for insisting that they do things carefully and methodically. Careful didn't get him out of small town Texas. Careful didn't get him the exciting non-stop life he has now, a life where he *almost* gets to be himself a lot of the time.

When Owen "dies," and its Curt's fault, he naturally turns to drinking to numb that pain. But its a lot of pain, so it takes a lot of alcohol to kill it.

I'm sure I could go on, but as always I have rambled a lot here so I'm just gonna leave it.

[lovehurried]

”How do you know that you're right?”

@wasworthy​​ gets another lyric one-liner Bling  ( Confession of a King )  ( The Killers,  Sam’s Town  ( 2006 ) )

[strangertheories]

If you're seeing this on a non-Nancy tag, it'll talk about what I tagged a bit later on!

I mentioned this on my TikTok (forever_ronance if you're interested), but Nancy antis using the scene with her and Steve in S2 when she's drunk and telling him she doesn't love him to insult her will never make sense to me. First of all, she can't control her actions because she's incredibly drunk. But secondly, she's a traumatized 17 year old girl whose best friend is dead but she can't openly mourn her as her family still thinks she's alive. Her dating Steve was a coping mechanism for this trauma, even if she didn't realize it.

Not enough people focus on what Nancy is saying beyond her calling her relationship with Steve bullshit. She says that they're pretending that they're ok and that they didn't kill Barb. You see, Nancy believes her having sex with Steve caused Barb's death, so she's acting like they're normal and in love because if she admits she doesn't love Steve, she admits that she "killed" Barb for nothing. When she's saying they're bullshit it's not a personal insult to Steve or that she's been using him, it's that she's traumatized and because of the alcohol and Barb's parents selling her house (plus the whole anniversary affect Owens mentioned), she's unable to repress those feelings.

She's had these emotions building up ever since S1 and I don't think she realized she even had these emotions, at least not fully. Yes it's horrible for Steve that his love is unrequited but she didn't realize she was using him and also sometimes people just do bad things because of trauma. Doesn't excuse it of course, but I don't get why people will forgive Steve for being a homophobic slut shaming bully but not Nancy for being a traumatized kid. Not to mention how Steve has always been a bit of a facade for her to try and seem different to her parents ironically by dating someone she didn't love and how we always knew she'd be actually rebelling by being with someone she loved like Johnathan. (This is especially cool to me with a sapphic lense through Ronance too as her rebelling from her parents would be her being true to herself with added queer angst but that's another post).

It frustrates me because people in this fandom will bang on about how trauantized everyone must be and how the show isn't exploring it enough (which is true in some cases) but then when a character acts out as a result of trauma, they then hold no forgiveness for their character. Like sure, act traumatized but only in a specific neat way that doesn't impact anyone else. I'm not talking about Billy here by the way, he was a racist abuser, I'm talking about people doing mildly bad or annoying things because of their past.

I think Mike and Will are big examples of this. A lot of people hate on Mike, but you've got to remember he's a teenager who's dealt with so much trauma who doesn't know quite how to process his emotions. He always takes accountability after the incidents too. But people act like he's an irredeemable who should be sentenced to medieval execution (exaggeration). This is ignoring the whole internalised homophobia stuff with him by the way since that is not canon currently. Or when people call Will an annoying crybaby who never does anything for the plot when firstly, he is the plot, and secondly, no shit a kid frequently mentioned to be sensitive with an abusive homophobic dad who was kidnapped and possessed when he was barely a teen will cry a lot.

People will extend so much grace to the characters if they're like Steve (because they think they're attractive) but then have zero sympathy for children trying to cope with huge amounts of trauma. Not to mention how people are more willing to extend sympathy to white male characters, but that's for another post.

[the-calico-codex]

lemme grab like. the sole chunk i sent my friends ^-^

From the start of outsiders, you see multiple things and there's several things TO note.

The STARR series (outsiders) is based around the contestants entering the maze, running the maze and the deaths and fallouts inside the maze and what comes of it.

Almost constantly, Mohwee wanted people to go INTO the maze, he even got graeccie to with him despite her not really wanting to. Before everyone comes up the elevator, if people create barriers and walls, Mohwee's still climbing and breaking them and going INTO the maze. ||after all, ever sine Eryn and Nico entered, there's been nothing, no entertainment||.

Because the people who watch didn't sign up to watch everyone play happy campers. They want thrills of watching them suffer and or thrive due to the traps and monsters within. Ratings would definitely go down if the season started taking a much slower pace or turn. (there IS also his clear fear of being trapped though that would explain this well, but honestly i don't think cc!Mohwee knew that was a real fear-)

This behavior can also be seen in Redd, being one of the few who's possibly/has already BEEN in the glade and STARR show before. As soon as it's daybreak, he's looking around the wall that Owen built, he's pretending to be invisible to climb over that wall another way around and hop over and in.

Those who were on the show prior always showed a desire to enter the maze that fascinates me so much because they KNOW they need to escape and might vaguely know why they were put there.

Then there's the fact that he already knows so many peoples names. His own, everyone who comes up the elevators. He greets them by name as soon s he sees them, even before they've identified themselves. A lot of people have varying levels of amnesia, most if not everyone barely remembering their past whilst others know a lot. Mohwee is one of the few who claims to remember everything. Which? Hm boy, why do you? I wonder? There's the fact that he's constantly trying to get people to stay longer in the maze as well at the start. mostly due to his own curiosity, granted, but also dragging people deeper and further. In actual time, Outsiders smp takes 5 years total. This is implying that every minecraft day is passing fully. Every day can be assumed to be 24hours. So of COURSE he doesn't want the season to drag on forever. It's a live show. The season needs to be fast, to be snappy and not overstay its welcome.

There's also him constantly causing drama, saying freaky weird shit ("You're not getting out of here you know"), appearing when people try to climb the walls for an easy way out and commenting on the fact that people shouldn't try, despite his clear "want" to escape. He's been driving the performance aspect further for the show from a tv station standpoint from the start. him being left in the maze caused drama. caused upset and an emotional disturbance. It left for a great pov for any voices in canon to tune into that we couldn't. Heavily implore watching owen's first few episodes over with the thought of "hey what if mohwee was on the side of STARR" and you can see it just. REEKS of it.

There's like. one bajillion reasons but that first really long one is my main lmaooo

do the outsiders smp enjoys fuck with my "Mohwee was on the side of the organiser since the start" theory or throw rotten tomatos at me from the pillory?