#“they've both killed entire civilisations”

[lilacthebooklover]

Goobert and Father of Goobert

they're so precious

[cyberpunk-20xx]

about masc!V's VA

cw for general spoilers and mentions of typical-canon violence

I always find it strange that people find masc!V's VA emotionless, or even annoying or plain bad. I'm not gonna say anything about fem!V's VA because I don't pay attention at all to it cus if I do it gives me dysphoria.

I don't, on the other end, find it that strange that most people I've seen with this opinion are in fact cis men.

To me masc!V's VA is actually super emotional, but not in the conventional likeable, heroic way. Jaded and reserved at the same time. I like the VA a lot for doing what I consider great work at presenting us a character who has lived from 2050 to 2077 in a deeply fucked up world where hope is so sparse. A world that we have no idea how fucked up is, even reading about the ttrpg because to me Cyberpunk Red is much less fucked up even if it is already a dystopia.

Just as a reminder, in CP77's NC society:

Amputation without actual health concern is highly encouraged all for the sake of pure performance. And nothing else. Your physical body is socially just disposable. The only way to keep up with the world that keeps eating itself is just to upgrade, and if you don't have the money for it? Fuck you, fuck your ideals, fuck your dreams.

You get suicide baited on the regular by the fucking street advertisements.

Violence against marginalised people is at an all-time all. Sex workers have it even worse than in the real world and that's saying something on how women and queer people are treated in general.

Acid rain is normal.

The majority of the animal population is extinct in the whole world. The cattle industry has collapsed and unless you're Kerry Eurodyne levels of rich, meat is either made of worms or insects and it's not even something hidden or taboo. In fact, it's shown explicitly in ads. Real vegetables and organic food in general is scarce as well. We might, irl 2023, start to be desensitized about it because we're on the brink of the ultraliberal hell that the game is portraying, but human's civilisation started with agriculture, and cattle culture was a big fucking part of that, regardless of one's ethics and morals about meat consumption (do not clown about veganism on this post, people are allowed to value animal life regardless of this video game blurb). In various quests, namely Panam's and River's, we can see firsthand how the collapse of that industry has rotten individuals and left the land in ruins.

Even a mondial star like Kerry or a fixer queen like Rogue are just, in the end, the bitches of the corps they sold out to, and unable to fight back. In fact, they've both given up entirely until V comes crashing into their life, with Johnny in tow. The fandom paints them as charismatic individuals but I really just think that's the rose-tinted glasses effect of us knowing what they used to be, when they tried, and them just being... Pretty conventionally attractive, quippy and sarcastic. But really even those two people who we are presented with as Succesful Individuals TM just... Man they just fucking suck, okay? They're miserable, they don't like themselves, they don't like who they are anymore, they don't have any speck of joy left in their lives, they're both estranged from their kids, alone, and just going on because death is scary. They're so human. They're at the top of the world and in the end they're still nothing in the face of it. Love them both so much but they're heartbreaking.

V always starts the game after having lost everything. Any other fucker in their place would have most likely finished just like a certain Heywood kid with spikey brunette hair. V is an exceptional individual for even having a chance at a second life.

V pretty much has brain cancer and is promised a painful, slow agonising death unless they basically kill themselves, and the less painful way to go is to gobble down medication but then that means giving the body up to Johnny. Johnny's first interaction with them is: violent physical assault and suicide baiting. It's hell. V is in hell. It could not be me if I were honest, I would not bother fighting it and I would not only alt+F4 from life, I would do as Johnny wishes at this point and erase us both at once.

V's so traumatized that when they lose Jackie, they're still able to function, but not enough to see a blatant trap coming. And when they have to carry Evelyn's corpse out of that tub, they don't have a breakdown, they just tank it. Which is not badass by the way, if you frame this as anything positive you need therapy yourself tbh boo you deserve better.

V's also a cold blooded murderer very easily if you want to take that path, and I'd even argue that the game makes it very hard for them to not be a killer honestly. Even the "non-lethal" optic mod doesn't work that well past a certain point. I've yet to try my hand at a pacifist run.

If you want V to be a good person, a hopeful person, someone who does not sound deeply suicidal and terribly fucked up, someone who's not used to death and treason as their daily lot, someone who's going to make you feel good about yourself when interacting with the world... I don't think you understood the game you were buying, nor that you were paying much attention while you were playing.

I'll be the first to admit have my own biases and gripes with the game's bleak looks on life, at its pretense at being "cyberpunk" when it truly only has the "cyber" part down, but at the same time I gotta give it to it, it's cohesive within its own universe and tone. V's canon, vanilla character makes perfect sense in the settings we are presented with. Masc!V's VA just does a good job of translating that.

But I guess that's not all of it, the difference between my interpretation and the one I made this post about makes sense because it is true that masc!V's VA does not act like the normal hero archetype at all, but like an anti-hero, except without the whole "charismatic leader" bullshit tone and bravado, unlike… Well, Johnny himself.

Masc!V's voice is not only not the voice of a good guy, it also fails to be the voice of a leader, of someone who's got it all figured out, of, well, the alpha male. It commits the crime of not being Good and not being Manly, at once! It even dares to be human and vulnerable at times! No wonder it gets haters lmao.

And the people I see bashing on masc!V's VA are always fucking kissing Johnny's ass for being who he is in the flashbacks, in the legends and at the beginning of the game. And that, to me, is pretty self-explanatory why I cannot relate with their opinion on masc!V's VA.

[a-blue-secret]

CHAPTER XXXIII

BACK TO MASTERLIST

Chapter XXXII | Chapter XXXIII | Chapter XXXIV

GENRES: royal au; fantasy au; magic au; friends-to-enemies-to-lovers; king!beomgyu, vizier!taehyun

PAIRING: taegyu

WARNINGS: mentions of scars (?)

WORD COUNT: 3k+

AN: This chapter is probably the shortest that the Court of Lies chapters have been in a while, but it's also the fluffiest that they've been for a long time! I hope you like it :)

SUMMARY: Best friends turned enemies, Kang Taehyun has managed to trick Choi Beomgyu into his service, and to rule for a year and a day, until his youngest brother would be old enough to take the throne. Choi Beomgyu has no intention of being obedient however, and tries to thwart Taehyun’s orders at every turn. With a growing amount of distrust and lies within the court, will Taehyun manage to keep the kingdom of Gojongja from falling apart?

“Yeonjun, how’ve you been?” Beomgyu cheered, holding out his arms as Yeonjun came running into the room. They hugged, Beomgyu almost being crushed into the pillows from the force of it.

“I should be asking you that,” Yeonjun grinned, patting his shoulder. “How have you been?”

“Oh, you know,” Beomgyu said, a smile on his face. “I just turned into a beast and almost went insane. You know, the usual stuff.”

Yeonjun laughed.

“Oh, and–” Beomgyu lowered his voice confidentially, “Taehyun told me about all the spy stuff. Though to be honest, I kind of suspected it already.”

“Yeonjun’s eyes were wide, looking at Taehyun. “You did what?”

Taehyun shrugged, sitting down in the chair beside Beomgyu’s bed. “I didn’t mean to,” he said. “But I had to mention Hueningkai to talk about the encounter with Soobin.”

“Ah, Hueningkai!” Beomgyu peered curiously behind Yeonjun. “Where is he? I thought he’d be with you.”

“Hey, hey, you’re going to fall out of bed if you keep wriggling,” Taehyun chided, fixing the bed covers. “Honestly, you’re like a child.”

Yeonjun looked behind him, walking back out into the hallway. He poked his head into the room. “Wait, let me just find Hueningkai first, then I’ll get him to you.”

Yeonjun’s head disappeared, and there were muffled yelps outside, and a lot of scuffling.

“Hey, what are you–”

“Beomgyu wants to see you, brat–”

“No– wait– how does he know–”

“Ask him yourself, now come on–”

“Ah! Yeonjun, my arm–”

Yeonjun dragged in a yelping Hueningkai, grinning. Hueningkai let himself be dragged by the cuff of his sleeve, looking rather shy. Beomgyu grinned as he saw the younger, and held out his arms for a hug.

“Hueningkai!” he beamed. “It feels like it’s been ages since I saw you.”

Hueningkai gingerly hugged Beomgyu, still looking rather awkward. But Beomgyu continued to chatter animatedly, and the Aruyeonan’s stiff frame relaxed, and soon he was grinning and laughing.

Yeonjun beamed like a proud parent, standing beside Taehyun.

“Hueningkai really adored Beomgyu,” he said. “When Beomgyu came to Aruyeo, he was literally the only person who was genuinely nice to Hueningkai.” He nudged Taehyun, grinning. “You have a pretty amazing boyfriend.”

Taehyun smiled, watching as Beomgyu got Hueningkai to relax. “I know, he said. “I know.”

There was the pattering of feet outside Beomgyu’s door, and someone knocked hurriedly. Taehyun walked over to open it, and was almost run over by the Kangs storming into the room. The Hwang siblings followed behind in a more civilised manner, but with big smiles on their faces.

“Beomgyu, oh, you’re finally awake!” Nabi sobbed like an overdramatic mother. “You don’t know how worried we all were!”

Beomgyu stared at them all in surprise as they engulfed him in a huge hug. “What? When did you guys get here?”

“They’ve been here for three weeks,” Hueningkai said, walking back to stand beside Yeonjun. Yeonjun wrapped an arm round his shoulder, smiling. “Yeonjun brought them here to help Taehyun.”

Beomgyu stared at the Kangs, eyes wide. “Wow… Taehyun searched for you guys for ages, you know. Even though he wouldn’t tell me, I knew he was. And yet Yeonjun found you just like that?”

“Well, he had help.” Hyunjin stepped forward, hand outstretched. “My name is Hyunjin. I'm a friend of Yeonjun’s. And this is my sister Yeji.”

Beomgyu grasped his hand, eyes shining with curiosity. Then he suddenly yanked Hyunjin forward, pulling him into a hug.

“No need to be so formal, Hyunjin,” Beomgyu laughed. “You’re Yeonjun’s friend: so you’re my friend too. And this is your sister?” He turned to Yeji. Yeji smiled, and Beomgyu reached forward to shake her hand.

“What, do I not get a hug?” she said teasingly.

Beomgyu gave a sheepish smile, rubbing his nose. “Ah, right! Sorry, I'm just awkward around girls.”

Yeji laughed, giving him a hug. “Don’t worry, I am too. It’s nice to finally meet you, though: the person everyone has been scrambling to save. I can see why it was worth all the effort.” She nodded her head towards Taehyun. “Your boyfriend started smiling more the moment you turned back.”

Taehyun, standing to the side while everyone crowded around Beomgyu, gave a smile. “What can I say?” he said. “I smile around people I’m comfortable with.”

“It’s nice to see you again after all these years,” Jiwon grinned.

“Likewise,” Beomgyu grinned back. He spotted Junghoon hugging Jiwon’s leg, and his smile widened. “Wait, is this Junghoon?”

Seohyun chuckled. “Yep,” she said. “He’s all grown up now, isn’t he?”

Junghoon smiled proudly. “I’m eight!”

“You’re eight?” Beomgyu gave a gasp, smiling at the child. “Oh wow, the last time I saw you, you were only four!”

Junghoon giggled.

“Do you remember Beomgyu, Junghoon?” Nabi asked. “He’s Taehyun’s best friend.”

Junghoon looked at Taehyun, then at Beomgyu. He laughed again. “No, silly, they’re boyfriends!”

The said boyfriends blinked in disbelief as everyone else burst into laughter. Junghoon giggled, proud at having made them laugh.

“Well, you’re not wrong,” Jiwon said, ruffling Junghoon’s hair.

Beomgyu chuckled. “Well, what have you guys been doing while I was half-insane and Taehyun was busy crying his eyes out?”

Taehyun punched his arm playfully, smiling.

Jiwon gestured to Nabi and Seohyun. “My badass sisters ran Gojongja while you were away.” He pointed to Yeonjun and Hueningkai. “They went and avenged their Queen.” He patted Hyunjin’s and Yeji’s shoulders. “These guys gathered info on how to bring you back, and also supervised Junghoon for me. And I went with the army to subdue the people who wanted to kill you.”

Beomgyu gaped at them, eyes wide. “Nabi and Seohyun did that? Wow, you’re incredible! So you managed to keep the entire Kingdom under control while being pestered by impertinent Lords and a huge insane beast was on the loose?”

“Oh, it was nothing,” Nabi said, smiling.

“And yes, we convinced the army to retreat from the forests, and affected towns are being compensated for their loss. With money coming from the Crown itself,” Seohyun added, grinning. “Everything is going well.”

“Good, good,” Beomgyu smiled. “Wow, you guys all worked really well while I was gone.”

“It was all for you,” Hyunjin said. “We all wanted you back. Even if we didn’t know you – aka Yeji and I – we could tell how much of an important person you were to the people who did know you.”

Beomgyu smiled at that. “Thank you, really. I had no idea that there were so many of you.”

“I mainly brought them so that Taehyun didn’t dissolve into an emotional wreck every day,” Yeonjun interjected, “but it’s good to see that he managed to gather himself and organise a plan.”

“I wasn’t that much of an emotional wreck!” Taehyun protested.

“Taehyun, flower, you were,” Seohyun said, smiling a little. “I didn’t want to say, but you had huge eye bags under your eyes when we came.”

“Speaking of eye bags, Beomgyu still looks hella tired,” Jiwon said. “We should leave him so that he can sleep.”

There were voices of agreement, and the Kangs and Hwangs began to file out.

“Rest well, Beomgyu,” Nabi said, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

Seohyun ruffled his hair. “Get better soon, okay?”

Beomgyu smiled, waving as they left.

And then, once they had left, it was just Beomgyu, Taehyun, Yeonjun and Hueningkai.

“So how long till you can walk again?” Yeonjun asked, dragging two chairs next to Taehyun beside Beomgyu’s bed so he and Hueningkai could sit down. “I heard you sprained both your ankles. Somehow.”

“I talked to Seokjin, and apparently sprains take three days to three weeks to heal,” Taehyun said.

Hueningkai nodded thoughtfully. “That’s a big time range. You could be waiting days or weeks for it to heal naturally.” His eyes lit up. “Or I could whip up a rejuvenator.” He nodded at Taehyun. “Like I did when you fell sick.”

“Does it taste nice?” Beomgyu asked curiously, leaning forward. “Cuz if it doesn’t, you might need to knock me out before I have it.”

“Oh, there’s no need to knock you out,” Hueningkai said, smiling. “It doesn’t taste like anything. Don’t worry.”

Beomgyu nodded, smiling. He sank back down into the pillows again. “So what were you guys doing just now? Taehyun told me about your spy mission over these past couple of weeks, but what about just now? Taehyun had to go fetch you.”

“Well, some spies decided that it would be a good idea to go down to the dungeons and threaten Soobin and his sister,” Taehyun said, staring pointedly at the two Aruyeonans.

Hueningkai held his hands up in surrender. “Wait, don't look at me. It was Yeonjun’s idea!”

“Hey, you agreed to it,” Yeonjun said, lightly punching his arm.

“We only went to tell them to surrender,” Hueningkai said. “When we got there, Soobin was all ready to escape.”

“You killed Arin though,” Taehyun said disapprovingly.

“She’s not dead,” Yeonjun protested. “Soobin just cursed her! Well, he cursed all of us but only she was affected.”

“Besides, we managed to effectively subdue Soobin, without anyone getting killed.” Hueningkai crossed his arms proudly. “I think we deserve a thank you for that.”

“I appreciate it, I do, but I just think that your intimidation tactics were wrong. I mean, I saw you threatening them with a sword! And that whole ‘killing’ thing? Why–”

“Don’t listen to what Taehyun says, because I for one think that what you did was perfectly acceptable,” Beomgyu interjected, grinning. “So is this what you normally do as spies? Intimidate and threaten people and then kill them if they don’t do what you want?”

Taehyun sighed and rolled his eyes, a small smile on his face as Beomgyu began to eagerly ask the two spies about their job.

Yeonjun gave a small laugh, waving his hand. “No, no. I don’t do that all the time. I’m not the mafia.”

“He goes to boring talks and tries to verbally convince people to do what Queen Erajin wants,” Hueningkai said. “He’s only ever been on three physical missions in the whole of our spy careers.”

“Got the scars for it too,” Yeonjun sighed. “A huge one along my bicep, along with tiny ones down my back.” He frowned. “I’ll never forgive that guy for ruining my perfect back. The scars all marr with my muscles, and it’s annoying.”

Hueningkai rolled his eyes, patting Yeonjun’s shoulder consolingly. “There, there. It’s okay. You and I are the only ones who are ever going to see your perfect back muscles anyway.”

“Hey–”

Hueningkai laughed as Yeonjun squished his cheeks angrily.

Beomgyu pursed his lips in thought, staring at the ceiling. “How long have you two been spies?” he asked.

“Since I was twelve, and Yeonjun was fifteen,” Hueningkai replied. “Twelve years.”

Beomgyu nodded thoughtfully. “You were adopted, weren’t you? Do you still have any family left?”

“Oh, as a matter of fact I do. Lea and Bahiyyih, my sisters.” Hueningkai smiled. “They helped Yeonjun and I get Queen Erajin back on the throne.”

“They’re so cool,” Yeonjun interjected, eyes wide. “Hueningkai’s sisters are so cool.”

“Hey, maybe you could ask them to come to Gojongja,” Taehyun said. “We’d definitely like to meet them.”

Hueningkai smiled. “I’m not sure when I’ll be able to see them again, but sure. Of course.”

Beomgyu tilted his head curiously. “But if you have family, why were you adopted?”

“Ah,” Hueningkai hesitated, giving another small smile. “It’s because we had to run away from where we were originally living. My sisters were the ones who were meant to go to Aruyeo with me, but somehow things got mixed up and it ended up with me being the only one who could leave. I came to Aruyeo at the age of seven. As a young child, I had to be adopted.”

“We didn’t even know Lea and Bahiyyih were alive until five years go,” Yeonjun said, comfortingly wrapping an arm around Hueningkai’s shoulders.

“I thought they’d hate me, since I was the only one who made it to safety,” Hueningkai said.

“They didn’t hate you though, did they?” Beomgyu said. “There’s no way anyone can hate you.”

Hueningkai gave a small smile. “Thanks.”

There was a tense silence. Then Taehyun clapped his hands, leaning forward.

“Alright, I think that’s one tragic past that we can unpack another time,” he said. “Maybe we can all gather to discuss our tragic pasts? I know for sure that Beomgyu and I have experienced rather traumatic childhoods, and by the sound of it, so have you two.”

Yeonjun smiled, standing up. “Right! We could all have a counseling session together where we just cry about our pasts.”

Hueningkai chuckled at that, smiling.

“But anyway, I think we’ll leave you and Beomgyu in peace now,” Yeonjun said. “Beomgyu ought to rest if he’s going to get well soon.”

Taehyun nodded. “Alright, see you!”

Hueningkai waved. “Get better fast Beomgyu.”

Beomgyu nodded, grinning. “I will.”

Hueningkai gave another wave, and then the two spies left the room.

A calm silence enveloped the room. As soon as the door had shut, any tension or hyperness dissipated from the room, and a tranquil atmosphere settled over them, as delicate and pure as a bubble.

Beomgyu lay back in his bed with a contented sigh, smiling up at the ceiling. Taehyun gazed around the room, watching the way the sun sparkled against the candelabras.

The bubble of calmness wibbled and wobbled and reflected the light pleasantly, rainbow patterns dancing leisurely as Beomgyu turned to look at Taehyun, smiling.

Taehyun caught Beomgyu looking at him, and smiled back. Neither of them said anything for a long moment, content with just basking in each other’s presence.

And then Taehyun spoke, and the bubble of calm popped to sprinkle a glittering cloud of happiness over them.

“You have no idea how wonderful it feels to see you in real life,” he said softly, bringing up a hand to trace intricate patterns onto Beomgyu’s cheeks. Beomgyu laughed at the tickling sensation, and reached up to catch Taehyun’s hand in his own.

“You have no idea how wonderful it feels to be able to touch you properly, with my own hands,” Beomgyu responded, the smile bright on his face. He sat up, keeping Taehyun’s hand in his own. And then, flipping it over so it was palm-up, he pressed his lips against the soft surface, before leaning forward to press Taehyun’s hand to his lips.

Taehyun’s ears pinkened as he recognised the palm kiss that Beomgu had given him. He took Beomgyu’s hand in his own and, ever so gently, gave him a palm kiss of his own. They both gave soft laughs, smiling widely at each other.

Beomgyu reached forward, placing his hand softly on Taehyun’s cheek. He gently drew Taehyun towards him, until their faces were mere millimeters apart. The next words Beomgyu said brushed against Taehyun’s lips, light and ticklish.

“Taehyun, love?”

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

And with that, Beomgyu closed the gap between them, and their lips met in a soft, gentle kiss.

.・゜-: ✧ :-

“Hey hey, don’t get up so fast, you might still pull your stitches out–”

Beomgyu tsked affectionately, gingerly standing up. “It’s been five days, love. I’m due to get them taken out in a couple of days. I’m sure that it’s very unlikely I’ll pull them out now.”

Taehyun sighed, letting Beomgyu use his shoulder to pull himself up. “If you say so.”

Beomgyu straightened, stretching. “Ah, it feels so nice to be standing on my own two feet again! How long has it been since I’ve done this? Three weeks? Four? I have no idea.” He gave a joyful yelp, spinning and jumping up and down. Taehyun laughed as Beomgyu ran around the room, arms in the air.

“Remember to thank Hyuka for the rejuvenator,” Taehyun said, as Beomgyu hopped over all sorts of furniture.

“I will, don’t worry!” Beomgyu called, doing a headstand before jumping onto his feet again. “Ah, this feels so nice!”

He leapt around the room, prancing and spinning around. Taehyun smiled. With his face set into a bright laugh, limbs nimbly jumping over objects, Beomgyu had never looked younger. It was adorable to watch.

Eventually, Beomgyu hopped to a stop in front of Taehyun, grinning. His face was alight with a smile, features glowing.

“I’ve missed this,” he said. He reached for Taehyun’s hand, gently kissing his knuckles. “I missed being able to hold your hand.”

He spread his arms, pulling Taehyun in for a tight hug. “I missed being able to hug you.” He pulled back slightly, hands running through Taehyun’s hair. “I missed being able to stroke your hair and kiss you everywhere.”

Taehyun laughed as Beomgyu placed feather-light kisses all over his face.

“And…” Beomgyu cupped Taehyun’s face with his hands, Taehyun’s head tilting up slightly to stare at Beomgyu adoringly. “I missed being able to hold your face in my hands, while…”

He leaned forward, kissing Taehyun.

“I missed being able to hold your face in my hands while your lips touch mine,” he finished, grinning widely.

Taehyun’s ears flushed, but he smiled, hands coming to wrap around Beomgyu’s shoulders.

“You really are the most adorable person ever,” he said, before pulling Beomgyu in for a longer kiss.

They were smiling: smiling so hard against each other’s lips that it was difficult for them to carry on the kiss. Taehyun pulled away, and Beomgyu leaned forward to gently nudge his nose against the vizier’s.

“I love you,” he said softly. “And I’m so glad that I’m able to say it properly now. I love you, Kang Taehyun.”

“It’s Jeo Taehyun,” Taehyun teased, smiling.

Beomgyu rolled his eyes playfully, kissing his nose. “Fine. I love you, Jeo Taehyun.”

“Though actually,” Taehyun said musingly, “Perhaps it’s Kang Taehyun, since I was legally adopted.”

Beomgyu laughed and peppered Taehyun’s entire face with kisses. “Make your mind up, will you? I want to be sentimental here!”

“Okay, okay! I prefer Kang Taehyun, anyway,” Taehyun said, smiling.

Beomgyu pecked his lips. “Actually, on second thought, I think Choi Taehyun is better,” he said. “What do you think?”

Taehyun’s ears warmed yet again, and he buried his face into Beomgyu’s neck, giving an endeared sigh.

“You know what? I think I like that too.” He breathed in Beomgyu’s warm scent, and smiled. “I love you too, Choi Beomgyu.”

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