#»never again will we trust a dragon. It has decimated our city and our loved ones.« BRO THAT'S SO TRAGIC. IT WASN'T TSILON'S FAULT HE WAS

[arvale-artist]

🍃🌱🌳Malzubed in his forest. 🌳🌱🍃

Arvale really likes to take a spin on existing clichés and tropes, and here's one of them!

Malzubed The Fire Dragon who doesn't like the heat and enjoys chilling in his forest. Which IS actually a forest you can visit in Arvale Short Tales!! Unfortunately only playable on pocket PC...

Dragons, particularly fire dragons, are not the type of creature one would associate with prosperity and green nature, but here we have one who has an entire forest named after him.

In the good ending you actually see him in (presumably) his forest when Duncan gives him a visit =] Which I find so neat...

Apologies for the crunchy quality, but I don't upload high resolution art anymore. ^^; This is an oil painting BTW.

[virlath]

harellan

Some time after the second Exalted March against the Dales, Fen’Harel’s title and meaning changed from rebel leader to the god of betrayal.

The Dalish use "Harellan" to mean "traitor to one's kin," but the word does not appear in any elven text before the Towers Age. The ancient root-word is related to "harillen," or opposition, and "hellathen," or noble struggle. The Dalish call Fen'Harel a god of deception, but I posit a far more accurate translation would be "god of rebellion."

===

If you drink from the Well of Sorrows, you are able to enter Fen’Harel’s sanctuary with a secret greeting.

Ar-melana dirthaveren. Revas vir-anaris.

Ar-melana = I, now

dirthaveren = promise (elves refer to it as the Exalted plains)

revas = freedom

vir-anaris = path/way(passage) of time ? (this is an interpretation based on the word bellanaris/bellanar)

I realise many people often translate vir-Anaris to the “way of Anaris”, but I disagree. If we’re going by consistency I would expect the phrase to be “vir-Anaris” and not “vir-anaris”.

Given that we know the elven language is intentional, I interpret the phrase to mean “I promise my time in the fight for freedom” . In other words, his rebels dedicated their lives to his cause, which was a weighty promise considering they were immortal.

Anyone who wanted to enter Fen’Harel’s sanctuary were made to promise this. Sure, none were beholden but by choice. But the blessing also says “He leads only those who would help willingly.”

The Promise of Fen’Harel

A wash of powerful magic carries a pang of hope. Images flash by: a man in wolfskin standing with a group of freed slaves, clasping one's arm in friendship. Words aren't so much heard as felt:

"Fen'Harel has been falsely named a god, but is as mortal as any of you. He takes no divine mantle and asks that none be bestowed upon him. He leads only those who would help willingly. Let none be beholden but by choice."

This is because Fen’Harel also made a promise to them in return.

The specifics of his promise aren’t elaborated on, but based on the Skyhold codex (which I’ll break down later), I think it’s safe to say it was the promise of freedom and freedom of choice. I also think there is a possibility the promise he made to his people formed the foundation of the meaning of dirthavaren.

Dirthavaren is often referred to as the Exalted Plains, land promised to the elves by Andraste. If you connect enough dots though, I believe the elves’ search for a homeland can be traced back to the promise made by him - that they would one day be able to live freely on land they could call their own.

When the veil was created, Fen’Harel fulfilled his promise to the rebels, ensuring their freedom and imprisoning the false gods for “eternity”. However, this came at the price of the elves’ empire and immortality- a loss many of the elves likely never even imagined was on the cards to begin with. 

Not only did the survivors of Arlathan have to suddenly contend with a vast new world sundered from the Fade, they could now also age and die, a fearful thing to consider when you realise these beings likely previously existed for millenia.

The pages of this book—memory?—show a solemn group of elves in an ampitheater of living wood, entire trees grown into seats and stairs for the listeners to recline on. Two other elves and a spirit of learning are speaking in turn on ways to bend the properties of the material world when casting spells. At the end, the spirit, with the air of a senior lecturer, floats forward and booms in a surprisingly deep voice.

"The unchanging world is delicate: spells of power invite disaster and annihilation. The unchanging world is stubborn: the pull of the earth fiercely resists making fire run like water or stone rise like mist. The unchanging world rings with its own harmony. Listen with fearless hearts, and great works will unfold."

Without warning, survivors were thrown into the unchanging world where their magic now invited annihilation.

Clans and tribes gave way to a powerful empire called Tevinter, which—and for what reason we do not know—moved to conquer Elvhenan. When they breached the great city of Arlathan, our people, fearful of disease and loss of immortality, chose to flee rather than fight. With magic, demons, and even dragons at their behest, the Tevinter Imperium marched easily through Arlathan, destroying homes and galleries and amphitheaters that had stood for ages. Our people were corralled as slaves, and human contact quickened their veins until every captured elf turned mortal. The elves called to their ancient gods, but there was no answer.

Slavery relics such as the vallaslin lived on in elven nobles with the hopes it would save them, but the gods didn’t answer because they were imprisoned. And while Fen’Harel’s people knew he had won them their freedom, their mortality (and fear of it) meant the majority of the elven empire was inevitably decimated.

Solas believes in “cause and effect” and the way he won this “victory” is very similar to the Slow Arrow story, or the story about the noble asking him for advice on how to find the woman he desired. 

“Nothing is gained without something being lost”. 

With the eventual fall of the Dales, I presume it was only a matter of time before his people rejected the notion entirely that the Dread Wolf had in fact saved them and so the word ‘harel’ eventually morphed into ‘harellan’.

What care have I for gods I have never seen, for a Maker I do not know? Let others distract themselves with such lofty concerns. I know only this life, I have seen only this world, and I care only for you. 

Mourn for the past—and all that was left there. For we trusted in dreams and perceived immortality. We trusted in promises and in hope. So we dreamed in vain, for we lost these gifts long ago.

===

The creation of the veil

Skyhold, or Tarasyl'an Te'las ("the place where the sky is kept" or, more specifically, "the place where the sky was held back") was once Solas’ fortress and likely the site where he created the veil.

"After he held back the sky to imprison the gods, the Dread Wolf disappeared" - Archivist in Vir Dirthara

Skyhold is filled with elven imagery and old notes and carvings are found throughout the castle as it is renovated. A scratching under a pillar reveals this block of elven text (which was probably translated by Solas ironically)

Skyhold has not just been claimed time and again, but sacked as well. We've managed to uncover some remnants, including a scratching under a pillar that mentions the name given by your witch. Old but still long after the place had been built over. But the author knew something of its first purpose, or at least, something of a legend.

Var'landivalis him sa'bellanaris san elgar Melanada him sa'miras fena'taldin (word missing) Nadasalin telrevas ne suli telsethenera Tarasyl'an te'las vehn'ir abelath'vir (word missing)

Even with assistance from your elf, we managed only a partial translation. Elven is often a game of intents, not direct mapping of phonetic meaning. That means it's a mess.

Our belief transformed into everything. (assertation/problem? uncertain) All time is transformed into the final/first death (uncertain), Inevitable/threatened victory and horrible/promised freedom in the untorn veils, (uncertain) Where the sky is held up/back, where the people give/gain love that is an apology/promise from/to....(missing subject, uncertain)

Mostly complete, as fragments go. The rhythm is strange, not like others I've recorded. Perhaps less a poem than a statement? The elven language does tend to meander.

My interpretation of the elven text, in bold:

Our belief transformed into everything. (assertation/problem? uncertain)

All time is transformed into the final/first death (uncertain),

Inevitable/threatened victory and horrible/promised freedom in the untorn veils, (uncertain)

Where the sky is held up/back, where the people give/gain love that is an apology/promise from/to....(missing subject, uncertain) 

The elves used will to shape their empire. This was a gift and a curse, possibly because it led to endless wars and in-fighting between those in positions of power.

The veil changed the flow of time and "quickened” the elves’ immortality, allowing them only one chance to live, age, and die 

The veil was created to ensure their freedom when the rebellion was threatened (I presume the threat was Mythal’s death). Thus the rebels got the freedom they were promised, but at the “horrible” cost of the entire elven empire.

Fen’Harel fulfilled his promise to his people at Skyhold by creating the veil, however he did so apologetically as the price of freedom was the destruction of the world that they knew. 

Solas says “every other alternative was worse” when it came to the creation of the veil. Given the fact the evanuris were clearly drunk on power and the blight was possibly already floating around too, I’m inclined to believe the urgency was there for him to make that hard decision. I think the biggest flaw in his plan however was that he didn’t seem to warn anyone but instead acted recklessly out of pride and rage.

Where willows wail 

We/it lost eternity or the ruined tree of the People,

Time won't help when the land of dreams is no longer our journey.

We try to lead despite the eventual failing of our markings.

To the inevitable and troubling freedom we are committed.

When we could no longer believe, we lost glory to war.

When the Wolf failed/won, we lost the People to war.

The war against the evanuris didn’t stop with the veil, as evidenced with Tevinter’s ransacking of Arlathan. Thus any memories or guidance that might have been saved by Arlathan’s survivors were just as quickly lost.

===

The din’an shiral / journey of death

The veil was the lesser of many evils, and it could even be argued it did/will end up saving many lives in the long run. Solas however only sees the ruins of a once grand, golden empire.

Imagine, waking up after millenia and realising the people you freed have become subjugated and live in squalor? Imagine encountering the Dalish and realising the majority of their culture is formed from relics of slavery? Imagine leading a rebellion fighting for freedom, only to be branded a traitor and god of betrayal by his own people in the aftermath? 

Perhaps he has realised he actually needs to let go of his own pride so he can properly fulfil the promise he made to his people, hence the di’nan shiral/journey of death.

When he says to Flemeth “...the failure was mine. I should pay the price...but the people..they need me”, she understands he is still beholden to the promise he made to them, because as it is, the elves have basically lost everything of their once grand empire.

When Solas encounters Nightmare in the Fade, Nightmare says to him:

Dirth ma, harellan. Ma banal enasalin. Mar solas ena mar din. 

Learn my traitor. You were not victorious. Your pride will be your death.

And Solas replies:

Banal nadas

It was long speculated before JoH that “Banal nadas” meant “Nothing is inevitable”, however Jaws of Hakkon revealed “telanadas” actually means the latter. Considering the fact the dialogue in JoH very specifically underscores the word’s meaning (In the old tongue, your name, Telanadas, means nothing is inevitable. I will remember your name and hope.) I’m inclined to believe “banal nadas” means something more specific.

banal = negates (inferred from banal'vhen=astray, banal'abelas, banal vhenan=you’re not sorry, you’re not my heart) 

nadas =  something that must be (inferred from telanadas=nothing is inevitable, mala suledin nadas=now you must endure)

It’s a fuzzy interpretation, but I think the phrase could be a negation to Nightmare’s assertion that his pride will be his death. Solas is rejecting Nightmare’s mockery as he is now willing to let go of his pride and potentially his life to save what’s left of the elven people. 

This is where it gets interesting, because his collusion with Mythal is one of the biggest mysteries to me. Did anyone else influence the creation of the veil or was it Solas’ own single-handed creation? Do Solas and Mythal’s end-games align or will his absorption of Flemeth’s power come back to bite him? Does Solas have a new plan for imprisoning/killing the false gods for good? Or is he actually planning on reinstating/working with allies from his time once the veil is destroyed?

When you say to him “you would murder countless people?”, he replies “wouldn’t you, to save your own?” 

Considering he doesn’t consider the modern elves as his own people, who actually are the people he is intending on saving?

And- this is the kicker for me- the fairy in the Tiniest Cave  quest says this cryptic message:

"He'll remake the world to suit his desires. His chosen to reign." 

Given the fact that I don’t think Solas was working alone in the rebellion, and the fact Flemythal went out of her way to save the old god soul, I’m starting to think they both have diverging plans for how everyone will be led into this new age of existence. This will obviously be a sticking point, because Morrigan was groomed to be the inheritor who awaits the next age, something I could see Solas disapproving of.

Now we know from TN that Solas’ plans involves “saving the world” and that he is “sympathetic to elves”. While all of this may be true, the reason you cannot sway him on his path is because his primary motivation is upholding the promise he made to his people. Perhaps he even intends to clear his name in doing so, whether that is by exposing the evanuris as frauds once the veil is destroyed (maybe his pride will come back to haunt him after all, depending on your relationship with him in DAI) or by destroying the eternal/Black city for good.

[generallynerdy]

Our Little Secret Part 14/Finale (Merlin & Child!Reader, Mordred X Reader)

Parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, and 13

Summary: (Y/N) and Merlin have to come to terms with their little secret being revealed. Everyone else has to adjust to the fact that they’ve been lied to for years by the two people they trusted most.

Key: (Y/N) - your name

Warnings: eMoTiONs, mentions of injuries, mentions of near death, recovery, magic-phobia?, u can’t prove that it’s an author insert fuck u

Word Count: 4,236

Note: is it,,,is it over yet? am i free,,,? extra long final (except the epilogue) part bc i love u

    “This is harder than I thought it would be,” (Y/N) muttered, legs hanging over the edge of the mountain.

    “Really?” Beside her, Merlin snorted. “This isn’t even the worst it could be.”

    She looked over at him with wide eyes. “What’s the worst it could be?”

    “Uther could still be alive.”

    “Touché.”

    The pair rested in silence, watching the sun slowly crawl up the sky. Dawn had come a while ago, but they had yet to leave Camlann. Arthur wanted to scour the battlefield for their men, dead and wounded. They gathered all the dead and were giving them proper funerals or packing up their bodies to take back to family, if they had any. The wounded were taken care of by Gaius, but many of them didn’t survive.

    (Y/N) had not entered the medic tent again, instead spending her time with Merlin and giving Arthur a few hours time before she dared show her face. It killed her to stay away from Mordred, but she felt it was best.

    “I’m sorry for everything,” (Y/N) said suddenly, breaking the silence. “For not talking to you, for not listening to you, either.”

    “No, you were right not to,” Merlin admitted, not looking away from the view in front of them. “I was being ridiculous. I was so worried about Mordred being the druid to kill Arthur that I didn’t consider that my decisions might push him to that.”

    (Y/N)’s eyes widened. “It wasn’t your fault, Merlin. Morgana controlled him.”

    “The only reason he didn’t choose it on his own was because of you,” Merlin said, finally turning to her. “If Arthur had made a decision against magic or someone doing magic, Mordred might have turned. You being here stopped him and I should’ve seen that.”

    “So…” She grinned. “Are you sorry for being a clotpole?”

    Merlin sighed and put an arm around her, drawing her into a hug. “I’m sorry for being a clotpole.”

    It took (Y/N) a while to get the courage to go into the medic tent again. When she did, she saw Leon lingering by Mordred’s cot. Gwen and Arthur were nowhere in sight, nor was Gaius, but he was rather busy as it was.

    She wandered over to the cot, pulling up a chair and sitting on the opposite side that Leon did. She didn’t meet his gaze at first, just taking Mordred’s hand and remaining silent.

    “(Y/N)?” Leon started.

    It took everything in her to ignore him, to look down at her hands and refuse to make eye contact. Though he couldn’t get her complete attention, she was still listening and he knew it.

    “I don’t hate you.”

    (Y/N)’s head shot up against her own intuition. She didn’t speak, eyebrows lowered and searching his face to see if he was lying.

    “I don’t hate you,” he said again, a little louder. “I could never.”

    He’d heard what she said to Gaius about being worried that everyone would hate her. What (Y/N) didn’t understand was how he didn’t hate her.

    “I’ve been lying to you since I’ve known you,” she said. “How are you not upset?”

    Leon sighed. “I’m...upset you didn’t feel like you could trust me with your little secret, but nothing else.”

    “You--” (Y/N) tilted her head. “You don’t think magic is evil?”

    “Druids saved my life, remember?” He smiled fondly. “Since then, I’ve known magic isn’t innately evil. And neither are you. You’re my friend, my sister. The most evil thing you’ve done to me is have Spot wake me up in the morning.”

    (Y/N) laughed shakily, remembering it fondly. She did it a little too often, more than Leon would like, but it was entertaining.

    “The others don’t hate you, either,” Leon said.

    She shook her head. “You don’t know that.”

    “I’m sure of it. If they really love and care about you, then this won’t change anything,” he told her. “It hasn’t for me.”

    “Thank you,” she whispered, moving her hand from Mordred’s to his, making him smile.

    There was a pause before he squeezed her hand and stood, letting go. “I’ll check on the others. Take care of him.”

    “I will,” (Y/N) muttered as he left.

    For a good while, (Y/N) was left alone. She dozed off a few times, trying to get much needed rest. Gaius dropped by and checked on her wounds, which were luckily minor. She never left Mordred’s side, constantly making sure he was alright. It took him a few hours, just as Merlin predicted, before he began to stir.

    “(Y/N)?” He croaked out, opening his eyes slowly.

    She snapped to attention and smiled, holding his hand. When he started to sit up, she stopped him. “Careful, careful. Merlin said you’d be sore.”

    “Ow,” he muttered, but froze. He smiled slightly. “The spell worked.”

    In his moment of awe, (Y/N) leaned forward and took him in her arms. She held him tightly and felt his arms wrap around her lovingly.

    “I was terrified,” she whispered. “I thought I’d lost you.”

    Mordred let her go for just a second, drawing closer to her face and caressing her cheek. “It was you that brought me back,” he muttered. “Seeing you broke the spell.”

    “I love you, too,” she said, echoing some of his dying words. She kissed him softly, hand buried in his messy curls.

    After that, they spoke in hushed tones. (Y/N) updated Mordred on what had happened. They held a brief moment of silence for Morgana, remembering the woman she had once been. She told him about what Leon said to her and he celebrated with her, but then the conversation was drawn to the topic of their magic.

    “They all know about my little secret now, too,” Mordred muttered. “The rumours can’t have passed by them.”

    (Y/N) took his hand. “We’ll be okay.”

    “You really believe that?”

    “We’ve been through so much worse, Mordred,” she said firmly.

    He laughed a little. “Fair enough. I have almost died twice-- and that’s not counting my childhood.”

    They shared a laugh that was interrupted by a dog’s yip. Spot raced in from out of nowhere, trying to jump on Mordred’s bed and smother him. (Y/N) reprimanded him and he soon calmed down, but neither of them knew where he came from.

    Unbeknownst to them, Gwen and Gaius had kept him in the medic tent the whole time, keeping the loyal dog from harm.

    There were many bridges to cross on the way home, but at least they had each other.

    Back in Camelot, rumours flew left and right. The majority of the population was aware of Mordred’s presence in the city and were furious, confused as to why Arthur would harbour an enemy. He planned to speak on his behalf, but he wanted answers from Merlin and (Y/N) first.

    Meanwhile, the animosity, or at least tension, between (Y/N) and the other knights did not go unnoticed. Merlin’s temporary absence from his master’s side was noticed, too, as was Mordred’s stay in the court physician’s quarters rather than his own in the knights’ quarters. The entire tightly knit group of Arthur’s closest friends seemed to be falling apart, for reasons unknown to everyone.

    One day, (Y/N) was summoned to the throne room, though Mordred, Merlin, and Gaius were told to remain behind.

When she arrived there, after nonstop reassurances from the Merlin to the young knight, she found that it was not the council gathered, but instead her friends. Gwen and Arthur sat on their thrones, while the knights stood dutifully about the room. (Y/N) had a distinct feeling that this was not a purely social audience.

Arthur began to question her, as if she was a suspect in a crime. Leon shot her uncomfortable glances, wishing he could make it stop.

“How long has Merlin been teaching you?”

Merlin had already had a long discussion with Arthur, giving him practically his whole life story, from his father, to his mother, to his powers, to the dragon he freed from under Camelot. Arthur knew almost everything about him. Now, it was (Y/N)’s turn.

“Since a few years after I met you, my lord,” she said.

His expression showed no change. “Who knew about your...little secret?”

“Merlin, Gaius, Mordred-- ever since we were little.” She began to list them off, remembering each fondly. She paused, saying the next name too quietly for him to hear.

“Speak up.”

(Y/N) sighed. “Lancelot.”

Leon shot her a sympathetic glance and Gwen looked absolutely decimated by this fact. A few sombered, but the expressions were gone as quickly as they had appeared.

“Morgana knew, too,” (Y/N) muttered.

Arthur lowered his eyebrows. “You told her?”

“No, sire,” she stammered. “She, uh, had me followed and I didn’t realize. It was a while before Ismere-- just after we buried Lancelot.”

Suddenly, Arthur asked a question that left her dumbfounded.

“Have you ever used magic against someone? Or to get what you wanted?” He asked stiffly.

Her jaw dropped as she looked up at him, appalled that he could even ask her such a question. She glanced around at the others, as if asking whether they believed she could be capable of that, but most of them didn’t make eye contact. Elyan just looked away, perhaps ashamed at the question. Gwaine stared right through her, which was arguably more chilling. Percival was the only one to meet her eye. She couldn’t read him, though. (Y/N) didn’t know what he meant, looking at her like that.

“No, sir,” she said firmly, teeth clenched. “The worst I’ve done is defend myself.”

“And the second part?” He questioned further.

She paused. “One thing.” They all looked terrified, but she smiled. “I used my magic to help a little druid boy escape the castle, a long time ago. Morgana, Merlin, and my lady were there. You were, too.”

She spoke bravely and Arthur went silent after that, his eyes darkened with reminiscence. They had saved Mordred long ago, even though he was a druid. (Y/N) was trying to remind her king of this.

“I asked Merlin to take me as an apprentice the day I met him,” she said, taking her turn to give a speech. She was young, but she had so much to say. “I started a few years later and I-- I didn’t realise what I was getting myself into. I didn’t understand the secret I had to keep, the people I had to keep it from. I didn’t understand the consequences. But I did later. And I could’ve easily given up then, but I didn’t. My magic is part of who I am, it has been for a long time. Just because you know about it now doesn’t change me. But I am sorry, deeply sorry, that I’ve hurt you-- all of you.”

As (Y/N) was leaving the throne room, she did not see Leon go to follow her.

“Leon--” Elyan started, grabbing his arm to stop him.

The senior knight turned to him with a frown. He looked at all of them gathered, who were staring at him, waiting for his move. He scoffed a little and pulled away from Elyan’s grip, shaking his head at them.

“I can’t believe you,” he said to them as a friend, rather than a knight. “It’s (Y/N).”

With that said, he was met with silence. He shook his head again and rushed out of the throne room, catching up to (Y/N). He took her arm and they started toward god knows where.

As soon as he left, Percival took a second to think before following him. No one dared stop the giant, nor did they dare even try. He caught up to Leon and (Y/N). They didn’t make him say a thing, simply letting him join them. That was enough of an apology-- and a reassurance.

Later, when (Y/N) returned to check on Mordred, she was accompanied by Percival. Leon had to abandon them earlier for work purposes.

Entering Gaius’ chambers, they found Mordred asleep in his bed, but he was not alone. Sitting in a chair pulled up beside him was Queen Guinevere, who looked up as they walked in. (Y/N) froze up and turned to Percival, but wasn’t sure what to say.

“(Y/N),” Gwen said. “Can we talk?”

“Of course, my lady--” She began.

Gwen interrupted her with a shake of her head. “Just as friends,” she smiled.

Percival cleared his throat and nodded at both of them. “I’ll just--” he started, backing away from the room. “Goodnight.”

(Y/N) closed the door behind him as he left. When she and the queen were left alone, there was silence. The young knight crossed the room to Mordred’s bed, checking on him as he snored lightly. She couldn’t help smiling to herself at his peaceful slumber, but let the smile fall when she noticed Gwen staring.

Trying to avoid conversation, (Y/N) lifted her hand and began a spell, gesturing to the pitcher of water on the table. She stopped instantly when she saw Gwen’s eyes widen, the yellow glow in her own eyes fading.

She started to walk toward the pitcher, but Gwen spoke, stopping her.

“You shouldn’t have to hide it,” she said.

(Y/N) reeled. “What?”

    “You don’t have to hide it now,” Gwen repeated. “Why avoid using it if there’s no consequence anymore?”

    “I--” (Y/N) sighed. “I don’t know if Arthur would like that.”

    The queen smiled. “Well, he’s not here now, is he?”

    She was shaken by the queen’s easy going reply. Unsure, she lifted her hand again. She finished the enchantment this time and the pitcher went flying into her hand, spilling just a little bit of water. Two cups flew over from the table at her command as well and soon she was pouring the liquid into them. (Y/N) passed one to Gwen and kept one for herself, pulling up another chair beside her.

    “Did you know?” (Y/N) asked her suddenly.

    “About your little secret?” Gwen laughed. “No, of course not.”

    The younger one tilted her head. “Then how are you so...unbothered by this?”

    “I just think it explains a lot,” she admitted. “Besides, I’ve suspected Merlin for a long time.”

    “You’re kidding,” (Y/N) gaped.

    “He’s not exactly conspicuous,” Gwen laughed.

    She shrugged with a fond smile. “Well, he’s kept it hidden for this long.”

    “Fair enough.”

    “What made you think he had magic? When were you really sure he was hiding something?” (Y/N) asked out of pure curiosity.

    Gwen sighed. “You were so angry with him after Mordred came back with that spear injury, the one that almost killed him. I didn’t understand until I considered that he might have magic. You were upset because he wouldn’t heal him, weren’t you?”

    “He refused,” (Y/N) confirmed, nodding solemnly. “I stopped talking to him after that.”

    “I don’t blame you. If someone did the same to Arthur…” She trailed off, not even wanting to think about it.

    It was beginning to get dark, so (Y/N) lit a few candles, requiring just a simple spell. Gwen almost awed at it, which made the young knight flustered. No one had ever taken this much of an interest in her magic, not since Lancelot.

    “It really doesn’t bother you?”

    “Absolutely not,” Gwen reassured her. “It explains so much and-- and it sounds silly, but I feel like I know you better now.”

    (Y/N) could not help hugging her friend, burying her head in her shoulder. “Thank you,” she whispered. “It means so much to me.”

    A soft knocking came from the door and both women turned their attention to a short figure entering the room. It was Elyan, who seemed to have been there for a good while. He had heard at least the last part of their conversation, which (Y/N) felt red in the face about. Gwen looked rather pleased with herself, though.

    The queen stood and crossed the room, taking her brother’s wrist and dragging him back over to (Y/N). The young knight stood from her chair to meet them, remaining silently confused by whatever was happening.

    “Tell her,” Gwen said firmly to her brother.

    Elyan took a deep breath. “(Y/N), I--” He glanced at Gwen, who nodded. “I’m sorry I’ve been treating you terribly. To be honest, I was...not happy when I found out about your little secret. Magic killed our father and since then--”

    “I understand,” (Y/N) said quickly.

    “No, wait,” Elyan stammered. “Just because one sorcerer killed my father doesn’t mean every sorcerer will be just as bad and you certainly won’t. I don’t know what came over me. I’m sorry.”

    Before she could say a word, he hugged her tightly, almost cutting off her airflow. She laughed, telling him it was okay and hugging him back. Gwen stared on proudly at her work, as it had taken hours to convince her brother to speak to (Y/N). Though she still could not convince Arthur to work out these things, at least she could get Elyan to do so.

    “I love both of you so much,” (Y/N) said softly, dragging Gwen into the hug. “You’re like the siblings I never had.”

    As Arthur had yet to speak about the rumours going around that (Y/N) and Merlin were sorcerers, the former was loathe to go outside. However, when she heard that Gwaine had left the castle and run off without any sign of where he went, she knew she had to do something. She had a feeling she knew where he was-- and a feeling that he was waiting for her.

    She found him in the clearing outside the city, just where she thought he would be. It was here the old Lancelot had been put the rest, because it was such a perfect place for him. It was here Gwaine had trained (Y/N), because she thought Lancelot being there would help her. It was here Morgana had discovered her little secret.

    “Gwaine?” (Y/N) asked quietly.

    He was standing above the stone, holding the hilt of his sword so firmly that it looked as if it might shatter like glass. “I knew I could never replace him,” he said without turning around. “I knew I could never be as perfect as he was. I knew I couldn’t be him.”

    “Gwaine--” She tried to say.

    “But to not tell me about this?” His voice betrayed him as he turned, eyes wet with tears. “To know that I was nothing compared to Gaius, to Merlin, to Lancelot, to Mordred? To find out I was nothing in your heart? Why, (Y/N)?”

    “I couldn’t tell you,” she sobbed. Her heart was already broken at his words. “I wanted to-- I planned to after Ismere, but-- but--”

    She took a deep breath, trying to shove away the memories. She didn’t want to remember Ismere, much less what Morgana had done to her there. However, she needed to tell Gwaine what had kept her from telling him everything. He had to know that he was just as important to her as the others, that she meant so much to him that she would rather have died than have him hate her for this.

    “Morgana found out about my magic, like I said. But she knew I had to be taught by someone. She used you-- you and Percival against me,” (Y/N) said, shuddering as she did. “To find out who taught me. She needed to know who Emrys was, the one destined to destroy her-- that was Merlin. I almost told her. I would have told her, given time. After we got out, I knew I couldn’t tell any of you. If you knew about Merlin, who he was to Morgana, then she could have tortured you, pulled it from you and I-- I would’ve been to blame.”

    “I wouldn’t have told her,” Gwaine hissed. “Do you trust me so little?”

    (Y/N) leapt at him and wrapped him in her embrace. “I know you wouldn’t have. I just didn’t want her to have any reason to torture you like she did with me. I didn’t want you to get hurt.” She kissed his cheek, still shaking. “You mean so much to me. You’re not New Lancelot-- you haven’t been for a long time. You’re Gwaine.”

    Arthur was the last one left.

Everyone else had approached, apologised, and asked more about (Y/N) and Merlin’s magic. In fact, many of them were rather curious about the whole thing. They were amazed by the range of bullshit the two could get up to with the assistance of their magic alone.

Meanwhile, the king refused to talk to either of them. He had shut himself off from the world, from everyone, even Gwen. She was scared for him and begged (Y/N) to step in. Perhaps she could appear unthreatening to him, unlike Merlin. Perhaps she could get through to the man.

She caught him alone in the throne room one morning, a place where he was cornered. He sat upon his throne and watched her with curious eyes. Then, he stood, leaning over the back of the chair and sighing.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” He asked.

“I wanted to more than anything,” she said in almost a whisper. “But I was just a child. I was so scared. I was terrified of Uther, of Agravaine, of someone discovering me and-- and what you might do if you found out.”

She noticed his face flash in betrayal and sadness for a second, but it disappeared in an instant.

“I didn’t want you to have to decide between saving me or following the law. It wasn’t fair,” she muttered. “And I didn’t want--”

She stopped.

“Didn’t want what? To die?” He laughed coldly. “Can’t blame you there.”

“Every day of my life was a risk. I could’ve died any day, but I didn’t want to die at your hand.” She took a deep breath. “But more than anything, I-- Arthur, you have every reason to hate magic. You have every reason to hate it for what it’s done to you, for what people have done to you using it.”

It was true, every word that she spoke. Magic had killed Arthur’s family; corrupted them, tortured them. Arthur had every reason to despise magic and neither Merlin nor (Y/N) could deny that.

“I was terrified that hate would translate to me,” she admitted.

His eyes softened and he looked upon her with wonder. “You thought I would hate you? Why?”

“Because--” She scoffed. “Because I chose to practice something that had done such harm to you, to all of us. I just didn’t want you to hate me and-- and I still don’t.”

Suddenly, the king crossed the room. He paused, standing there in front of her. That little girl who had stood up to him about punishing Merlin unjustly was gone. She was a woman now, a powerful sorceress that Arthur owed for a great many things. Part of him was still upset, both at her and himself for the fact that she hadn’t told him, that she felt she couldn’t trust him enough to tell him about her magic. But the other part held nothing but love for her.

It was this part of him that took over when he hugged her, shocking her to the point where she froze.

“I don’t hate you,” he whispered. “I’m upset you didn’t tell me and I don’t know how long it will be before we can fully trust each other again, but I don’t-- and I will never-- hate you, (Y/N).”

The young knight sniffed heavily and hugged her king, who was more like her brother at this moment. She took in a deep breath and almost laughed out of relief.

“You’ll talk to Merlin, won’t you? Tell him the same thing?”

“I don’t know. I look at him and I want to punch his teeth out.”

“Call me crazy, Arthur, but that sounds about normal.”

Elsewhere…

A small hut in the woods was practically invisible to those who did not seek it out directly.

Inside this hut, a girl in a dark cloak pulled its hood over her face. She mixed herbs and vials together in a small bowl. It produced a blood red liquid, which she gathered in a tiny bottle, shaking it about. She turned to face a long wooden table that held a great weight on its ancient legs.

A dead man lied upon it, his dark hair and beard ratted. He was dressed in rugged peasants’ clothing, an outfit unfitting for a knight of his standing.

The witch-- ahem, sorceress-- took the bottle carefully and poured it into his mouth, forcing him to swallow it. After a moment of unresponsiveness, the dead man gasped into his lungs his second breath of first life. He looked around wildly, but was tied to the table as a precaution.

Meanwhile, the girl turned and smiled at him. “Alright, you handsome bastard. Up and at ‘em. I didn’t murder a man for nothing. Time to send you back to Camelot before my readers murder me.”

Merlin Tags: @pearlll09

Masterlist

[f4liveblogarchives]

Fantastic Four Vol 1 #117

Thur Jul 25 2019 [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Previously on the Fantastic Four [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Diablo: After 100 years I'm free! Time to conquer Earth! [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Ben: Fuck off *punches him so hard he's trapped again, then drops a castle on him* [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Diablo: After five issues I'm free! Time to conquer Ea--*falls through a frozen lake, presumably drowning* [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Diablo: After a heartfelt engagement and eight issues I'm free! Time to fuck a weddin--*gets fucked up off-panel* [07:23 PM] Bocaj: He also showed up in an Avengers story that was pretty meh [07:23 PM] Wack'd: Good to know [07:23 PM] maxwellelvis: It gave us Hank's new identity as Goliath, though. [07:23 PM] MousaThe14: Diablo, that’s the F4 villain that does magic potions, right [07:23 PM] maxwellelvis: Yeah [07:23 PM] Wack'd: He's an alchemist and also has a dragon robot [07:23 PM] maxwellelvis: He's the guy who turned Ben into a really creepy halfway version of himself [07:24 PM] MousaThe14: It’s been a time since I listened to the Fantasticast so memory isn’t the best [07:24 PM] Wack'd: We now return you to your comic book, already in progress [07:25 PM] Wack'd: Johnny has decided to go to the Inhuman City to recenter himself [07:25 PM] Wack'd: I'm sure everyone will be thrilled to see him [07:25 PM] Wack'd: *cough* [07:25 PM] maxwellelvis: "How's it going douchebag?" [07:26 PM] Bocaj: The most notable thing I think about the Avengers Diablo story is that Diablo tried to create AN ARMY OF DRAGONS MEN and also that Hank studying Dragon Man was the start of his Ultron program which thoroughly shits his life down the shitter [07:26 PM] MousaThe14: Johnny only brings good things with him [07:27 PM] MousaThe14: He’s a dummy [07:28 PM] Wack'd: PREVIOUSLY ON FANTASTIC FOUR [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: I need to go home, Johnny [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: No you don't! You're being brainwashed! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: No I'm not [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: I'm gonna fight your family! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Medusa: Good fuckin' luck! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: I'm gonna burn this entire city to the ground! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: I'M HERE BECAUSE BLACK BOLT IS DYING [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: Haha my bad. We cool? [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: We cool [07:28 PM] MousaThe14: That is so dumb [07:28 PM] maxwellelvis: He threatened to go supernova inside the city. [07:28 PM] Wack'd: I'm...not really exaggerating [07:28 PM] Wack'd: That's basically what happened [07:29 PM] Wack'd: Right down to Johnny making the conscious decision to destroy an inhabited city [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: Comics write high drama back then [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: You know how it is [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: Teen hormones run high [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: Soap opera emotions are intense [07:30 PM] MousaThe14: Sometimes you just gotta blow up a city [07:30 PM] Wack'd: Crystal did an about-face and came back with them [07:30 PM] Wack'd: She later returned to Inhuman City anyway because air pollution was killing her [07:31 PM] MousaThe14: Makes about as much sense as anything, complete with environmental message [07:32 PM] maxwellelvis: Crystal only ever seems to serve on the FF for short periods of time, probably because being the Avatar, Master of the Four Elements makes her a bit hard to write drama around. [07:32 PM] MousaThe14: They never had her be as powerful as she was [07:32 PM] Bocaj: As I said, consequences are for people without superpowers or money [07:32 PM] Bocaj: Which is a superpower [07:32 PM] Wack'd: Yeah they did! A couple of times! [07:33 PM] MousaThe14: Did they? Well that’s good. I guess they didn’t Sue her, huh [07:33 PM] Wack'd: She had the highest kill count when Mad Thinker and Puppet Master sent an army of robots after them for the 100th! [07:33 PM] MousaThe14: I thought they had [07:33 PM] Bocaj: Crystal will fuck you up [07:33 PM] maxwellelvis: Oh, it was the 100th that they had to run that gauntlet? [07:33 PM] Wack'd: She got seven named dudes on top of an entire hoard of robot Atlantans [07:33 PM] Bocaj: Crystal: "I'M THE AVATAR, YOU GOTTA DEAL WITH IT" [07:34 PM] Wack'd: So anyway Johnny arrives and immediately gets shot out of the sky, which as we've established is probably a reasonable and proportionate response [07:34 PM] MousaThe14: Indeed [07:34 PM] Wack'd: But it turns out it's because Maximus has conquered the Inhumans [07:34 PM] Wack'd: Again [07:34 PM] Bocaj: He's always up to that [07:34 PM] maxwellelvis: How typical [07:35 PM] MousaThe14: He has no other powers besides persuasion, right? [07:35 PM] maxwellelvis: Try to blow off steam by crashing at your girlfriend's place and family drama's going on over there, too [07:35 PM] Wack'd: Johnny is unimpressed by this plot twist

[07:36 PM] maxwellelvis: Does Maximus still have his Schmott Guy hat? [07:36 PM] Wack'd: We've yet to find out [07:36 PM] MousaThe14: I mean, how do they allow that to happen [07:36 PM] MousaThe14: I think at this point, the royal family deserve to be conquered [07:37 PM] Wack'd: He typically has an army of loyalists with shitty powers like "being a centaur" who provide armed backup [07:37 PM] Wack'd: But as Johnny quickly proves they're not very impressive [07:37 PM] maxwellelvis: He has a very trustworthy face https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/452938861807403018/604094860819169281/clean.png [07:37 PM] maxwellelvis: They don't even warrant names most of the time. [07:37 PM] MousaThe14: I mean, when you keep getting beaten by 1 dollar store Master, you deserve to stay conquered [07:38 PM] maxwellelvis: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/452938861807403018/604095064200839170/maximus-is-pleased.png [07:38 PM] Wack'd: So it turns out, Crystal never came back to the Inhuman City

[07:38 PM] maxwellelvis: I'm telling you, it's like looking in a mirror https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/452938861807403018/604095198829477918/gilsnicehat_3200.png [07:38 PM] Wack'd: No one actually knows what happened to her and Lockjaw when they left the Baxter Building for the last time [07:39 PM] Wack'd: So we're probably not actually gonna see Maximus this issue, max, sorry [07:39 PM] maxwellelvis: Alas [07:39 PM] Wack'd: Franklin, Sue, Ben and Alicia, meanwhile, have decided on a relaxing weekend getaway at Agatha's [07:40 PM] MousaThe14: Some say Havok has the worst hat in the Marvel universe [07:40 PM] MousaThe14: And that’s because they haven’t seen this monstrosity [07:41 PM] Wack'd: Reed, Sue, and Franklin play out in the yard, while Ben--reluctantly--hangs out inside so Alicia can feel Agatha's art collection [07:41 PM] maxwellelvis: If there's anything that sums up the Jack Kirby aesthetic of character design in one image, it's Maximus in that armor. [07:42 PM] Wack'd:

[07:42 PM] Bocaj: In fairness to the Inhumans Maximus mostly gets opportunities to keep conquering them because Black Bolt insists on keeping him around because he's his brother. [07:42 PM] Bocaj: Just goes to show loyalty to family is dumb [07:43 PM] MousaThe14: Oh yeah, that’s right, Ben is terrified of the supernatural [07:43 PM] maxwellelvis: Once again, Agatha's place just makes Ben think about his stories [07:43 PM] Wack'd: For the record this is the last issue of 1971 [07:43 PM] Wack'd: And thus probably our last Dark Shadows namedrop for a good long time [07:44 PM] MousaThe14: Man, Agatha’s just got an amazing design. Gotta love a witch with that face. [07:44 PM] MousaThe14: The face of a witch you can trust with your unreasonably powerful toddler [07:45 PM] MousaThe14: I’m not being sarcastic, I think she looks great [07:45 PM] Wack'd: I love Agatha's whole vibe and will be sad when she eventually becomes more of a Avengers/Strange supporting player [07:45 PM] Wack'd: They don't deserve her [07:45 PM] MousaThe14: Awws [07:45 PM] MousaThe14: Too bad [07:45 PM] Bocaj: she's not really an Avengers supporting player [07:45 PM] Bocaj: She hangs around them briefly but only for Wanda [07:45 PM] Wack'd: She has a whole thing with--yeah [07:45 PM] maxwellelvis: She's more of a Scarlet Witch supporting-yeah [07:45 PM] Bocaj: and then fucks off out of the book when she decides Wanda has probably learned enough [07:46 PM] Wack'd: Scarlet Witch doesn't really have her own book enough for the words "Scarlet Witch supporting player" to sound right [07:46 PM] Wack'd: Anyway Johnny pushes himself to the brink of exhaustion getting back to North America so he can ask Agatha to find Crystal [07:47 PM] Wack'd:

[07:48 PM] MousaThe14: So, was Lockjaw a person before the Terrigen Mists or a dog, does anyone know? [07:48 PM] Wack'd: Unfortunately the effort is too much for Agatha and all she can give Johnny is a glimpse [07:49 PM] Wack'd: MEANWHILE... [07:49 PM] Bocaj: A dog [07:50 PM] maxwellelvis: I now associate those sorts of big MEANWHILE...'s with Baywatching, so I'm almost expecting David Hasselhoff to show up cooking some sort of meat. [07:50 PM] Bocaj: There was a time when it was claimed that Lockjaw was an Inhuman person who was turned into a dog shape and made unable to talk by the terrigen mists but it was later later revealed that the Inhumans made up that story to fuck with Quicksilver [07:50 PM] Wack'd: "Meanwhile...  a dog" is accidentally correct [07:50 PM] Wack'd: Crys and Lockjaw ended up on some desolate, decimated world, a bombed-out city somewhere in space [07:52 PM] Wack'd: Turns out Doom banished Diablo here in Marvel Super-Heroes #20 so I'm just gonna...check the wiki real quick [07:52 PM] Wack'd: Okay so Diablo tried to blackmail Doom into a partnership by kidnapping Doom's childhood friend [07:52 PM] Wack'd: Doom retaliated by using the time machine to strand Diablo in a post-apocalyptic future [07:53 PM] Wack'd: Turns out Doom's childhood friend isn't suuuuuper thrilled he grew up to be a supervillain and runs off [07:53 PM] Bocaj: Doom has childhood friends he hasn't flayed into skin armor? [07:53 PM] Wack'd: Did [07:54 PM] Wack'd: Past tense [07:54 PM] Wack'd:

...unbeknownst to her, Doom had made a pact with a cabal of nether demons who offered unimaginable mystic power in exchange for the sacrifice of something of irreplaceable value — and Doom had chosen the life of the only woman who had truly loved him. Valeria was killed as the demonic spell unleashed by Doom consumed her body, her flayed skin becoming Doom's new enchanted armor [x]

[07:54 PM] Bocaj: Eesh [07:54 PM] Wack'd: I am now spoiled on a *Fantastic Four* comic from 2003 [07:55 PM] Bocaj: Wait. He named his godchild after the woman he ritualistically slaughtered to make skin armor? [07:55 PM] Bocaj: SUE DON'T LET DOOM BABYSIT ANYMORE [07:55 PM] Wack'd: Okay in fairness [07:56 PM] Wack'd: Valeria Richards was born 13 issues before Valeria Lastnameunknown got flayed [07:56 PM] Bocaj: Hm [07:56 PM] maxwellelvis: Is that right? [07:57 PM] Wack'd: Yeah [07:57 PM] Bocaj: Anyway sorry for spoiling you on a Fantastic Four comic again [07:57 PM] Wack'd: It's fine [07:57 PM] Wack'd: (Honestly I'm pretty sure I read that one and didn't realize it was the same lady from Marvel Super Heroes #20) [07:58 PM] Wack'd: Man Doom isn't even in this one, we're waaaaaaaay down a rabbit hole here [07:59 PM] Wack'd: So Diablo knocks Crystal and Lockjaw out with ALCHEMY until he can figure out how to make Lockjaw take him home, also presumably with ALECHEMY [08:00 PM] Wack'd: Meanwhile, back at the haunted house, turns out Agatha forgot to turn off the globe [08:00 PM] Wack'd: And it shows Crystal, Diablo, and Lockjaw to Johnny [08:01 PM] Wack'd: Aw jeez Diablo Princess Leiaed her!

[08:03 PM] Wack'd: Now that the three of them are back in the present things are getting positively retrograde up in here

[08:03 PM] Wack'd: I think we can all see where this is going [08:05 PM] Wack'd: So Diablo wants his own country so he can be Doom's equal [08:05 PM] Wack'd: And go kick his ass [08:06 PM] Wack'd: And Crystal makes the perfect fake god on account of the whole "avatar" thing [08:06 PM] Wack'd: This guy is very punchable

[08:07 PM] Wack'd: "Central America! You know, all of it, I guess!"

[08:08 PM] Wack'd: So this is, what, the second consecutive civil war Johnny's refused to get involved in this issue? [08:09 PM] Bocaj: Marvel is very bad at non America [08:10 PM] Wack'd: Yeeeeah [08:10 PM] Wack'd: *sigh* [08:11 PM] Wack'd: I might as well finish this arc so I don't need to look forward to more of this specific racism [08:11 PM] Wack'd: Other racism, maybe [08:11 PM] Wack'd: But not this one