#[this is actually cute wtf smol snake son]

[fart-gate]

SG1

Season 1 episodes 1 & 2

"CHILDREN OF THE GODS PART 1"

Notes by me 😊

- episode 1

- i just watched the movie like 2 seconds ago so im diving right in here folks lets fuckin goooooo

- poker in the SGC

- how much longer after the movie does this take place?

- nobody believes the lady. Typical

- the gate reveal when the tarp fell off🔥

- lol this is so 90s

- SNAKE PEOPLE

- these guys dont work for Ra do they? The costumes are different

- woa his eyes glow like Ra. Same species? Maybe?

- welp now what. They took that poor lady

- this theme💖💖

- i dont know how I feel about different actors here

- I love RDA from MacGyver but Jack seems very stiff acting wise

- as soon as this guy mentioned "stargate" hes all ears

- he keeps saying "im retired" I dont think he knows that theres like 10 more seasons

- mention of abydos!

- this Jack is alot more sarcastic....i like him

- "Over a year" ah ok so its a year later

- "Daniel was a scientist. He sneezed alot. Basically he was a geek" LMFAO YEAH

- wait wasnt Daniel an archeologist and not a scientist

- alright you can stop busting his balls sir. Daniels alive and well on abydos so pls try not to nuke the place

- this general is an ass

- this is so funny with all these new actors

- "skaara" 💗💗

- oh damn I forgot his son died

- OH MY GOD THE TISSUE BOX LMAO

- waiting on daniels reply. If he replies

- "thanks send more" IM SO EXCITED TO SEE YOOOUUUU

- a woman??? Oooo I feel like I'm going to love her probably. Is she the token woman of the series

- her name is Sam I already love her

- cool! The sexism from what are supposed to be her fellow soldiers is fun to watch

- this is just 8 minutes of her 'proving' that she belongs and I hate it

- Jack and Sam have future lover tropes👀👀 I have a feeling they are going to be good friends tho

- Operation Bring Back Daniel

- abydos status: still a desert

- DANIEL!!!!

-????? This guy acts exactly like james spadder are we sure hes not channeling his spirit somehow

- omg hes so cute??? The floppy hair. glasses boy. Little bean. Little muffin boy. Babey

- AHHH its skaara! Different actor? I cant tell

- share is DEFINITELY a different actress

- omg her and Daniel. So cute

- daniels reaction to sams nerd status

- sha're ??? Is so???? Into Daniel?? And u know what girl thats fair hes adorable.

- party on abydos!🥂

- LMFAO sha're letting everyone know EXACTLY who Daniel belongs to

- "captain-doctor" you can just say one Daniel its fine

- more gate symbols means more planets!

- "I knew id like you" best friends already????? Dont mind if i do

- *nerd talk*

- SNAKE PEOPLE ATTACK!

- pls dont kill sha're and skaara I dont think i can take sad daniel

- the budget for this show is poor but they really did their best I guess

- oh its the same snake dude from the sgc

- what do you want with them ya weirdo!!

- DANIEL OH GOD DONT BE SAD I LOVE U

- Bossy!jack

-love the tape on daniels glasses🤓 Peak Geek

- "nothing good can come thru this gate!"

"You came thru, daniel"

Im literally sobbing

- group hug bye world

- i was right I cant take sad daniel

- woa they have a shield? "Iris" cool

- hammond is mad at Daniel for leaving in the first place. Lets see how he gets outa this one lads

-- to be continued --

- Episode 2

"CHILDREN OF THE GODS PART 2"

- Hey its the soldier lady! This probably isnt gonna be good

- they just stripped her i am so very uncomfortable

- EW THERES A WORM IN HER STOMACH WTF

- rip soldier lady :(

- this henchmen dude looks like hes having second thoughts about his job lol

- more aliens like Ra who pose as Gods. Are they the worm things like what that lady has. Thats gross.

- everyone rolls their eyes when Daniel speaks. Is it bc hes a nerd. Nerds are usually right pls listen to him

- I'll get banger content with Daniel on the team bc hes the perfect specimen for Needs To Be Protected Because He Is Babey And Has No Combat Experience and a bitch knows thats my favorite type of character

- Jack pushing Daniel ahead of him. They have Big Brother - Little Brother vibes and I live for that

- sneezy!Daniel

- "im not afraid of you!" Thats right sha're!!! No fear!!!😤

- god poor skaara :(

- Daniel in his liddle uniform

- lmao Jack not listening to Daniel rant about symbols

- SHIT sha're was chosen. Also this henchmen dude looks like he does NOT wanna be here

- "she was a gift" not a good way to describe how you met your wife

- Hey Daniel how about dont run up to random strangers. Its episode 2 and you are already so dumb

- is he multilingual? I feel like I knew that but I dont remember

- dinner party! Good im hungry

- "I have no idea" fav Daniel line 💖

- sha're!!! Queen?

- sha're said YEET and chucked Daniel across the room

- Daniel and skaara hug!

- this fuckin henchmen guy

- apophis is the bad guys name

- what the fuck is a goauld

- "Jack help me please" I'm crying in the club

- the henchmen guy nodded?? At Jack??? And Jack nodded back??? What is this

- "something of the host must survive?" The desperation.....

- oh shit not skaara

- Jack bonked by Big Stick

- "I can save these people! Help me" oh my goodddddd

- WE HAVE AN ALLY FOLKS ITS MISTER HENCHMEN DUDE

- daniels glasses askew

- Jack just full on adopted this henchmen

- his name is Tealc!!!! You are now an O'Niell congrats

- hes a 'Jaffa'

- OH THATS NASTY HES GOT A WORM IN HIS STOMACH TOO

- "infant goauld" what the fuck

- he cant take it out so its always with him.......he is pregnant 😌

- I already love him???? Alien man ready to murder the people who enslaved him??? Like FAV trope writers good job

- these effects for the fire fight are actually really good

- Kowalski to the rescue!

- skaara :(

- when Daniel finds the symbols in his little book and hes like oh there they are haha and the rest of them are like DIAL IT ALREADY

- "come on!!!" Impatient!Sam

- at least they got all those people out

- I couldnt be happier with daniels status as Smol Babey of sg1 ✨ its really making my day

- tealc came with them!!! Hes gonna stay right? RiGHT

- group hug for the team!

- Jack found a new best friend in Pregnant Worm Guy

- he wants him to be on the team!!!!! Shut up this is awesome!!!

- a cute shot of the new team in front of the gate💖

- WELL THAT LASTED ABOUT 3 SECONDS! KOWALSKI IS A WORM NOW HIS EYES GLOWED somebody get me my shotgun🔫

- what an episode! A good start to what I'm sure will be an amazing series

~

Whump under the cut

Daniel jackson whump: shot by Big Stick thing, thrown across room, weak, unconcious, crying, coughing

Jack Oniell whump: hit in face by Bi Stick thing, thrown on ground by hand weapon thing, worried

[evenbechnet]

GROUP CHAT 7/01/17 GMT

Feel free to edit and add!! 00:00- all quiet, everyone finally goes the fuck to sleep

1am- salma, bells and Elliot having a party and crying about the summary, horse Even!?? Why? Animals, farm yard animal, farm discourse TM. Quack quack mother fuckers.

2am-killer tire in dessert movie, ohmygid these guys are literally shit posting idk what I’m summarising but I’m laughing, Elliot gets attacked by animals how is he alive?,

3am-9am- wondering about Eva noora discourse, wondering about anteater Wilhelm,

Fic Recs galore: - http://archiveofourown.org/users/rhalei/bookmarks - https://archiveofourown.org/works/8815849 - http://archiveofourown.org/works/8961337 - http://archiveofourown.org/works/8802484/ - https://archiveofourown.org/works/8820784 - http://archiveofourown.org/series/607585 - WIP with 4 chapter no link!???

Talking about terrible FICS again, werewolf isak vs hung horse even, RHAE “instead of biking to the pool ISAK rides on evens back”, furry vs curry discourse, this isn’t VILDUS pls , Taha: someone needs to read it and report back/////

Ao3 FICS are weird, mermaid fic, (someone rec that properly pls I havnt read it -Zaa) , more talking about the trailer dropping and how we gon die, might require spray bottles,

Daf is awake and approves of the FICS, caterpillar on chrispys face in s1 #confirmed, FANART is so sacred , must protect at all costs, so much talent

WHERE IS A SNAKES BUTTHOLE, snakesak has taken over as a horrifying meme, snake tongue compile? Snake videos? Pls provide links, he always licking his lipssss we should have known, WE CANT GO BACK,

10am- if Isak has dry lips Even needs to be licking them for him, JUST COUPLE THINGS EVAK

11am- Shola wages a one man war on the crispy discourse, her soul has been penetrated by p Chris, sprays bottle and despair, Shola tried recalling her fellow demons daf and Rhae for back up, more pchris discourse(more like only pictures), hating on shola )): , everyone being possesed by pchris, FICS discussion, ao3 vs lj vs ffnet, first fandoms?

12am- Harry Potter aus, which houses discourse,slytherin isak and his snake pickup lines, see seperate post.drawings of snakesak with snake.

1pm- ISAK so pale, cafeteria scene creys, that week was too dark, General ep 6 and 7 love, SHOES, halla scene vs hotel room scene, matching boyfriends

2pm- it was defo isaks first time, INFINITE, why was Even hair still perfect, it was the icecream secret, Faiza pray bottle is needed, when even touches isaks Lip in the hotel SCENE, NOSE IN HIS MOUTH, ER DU DANSK, 2pm is Lot okay- AND ISAK BEING SO CLOSE TO HIS MOM LIKE "OK BUT YOU DIDNT PAY ME THIS WEEK AND YOUR SON MADE ME BUY SO MUCH SHIT WITH MYYYYY MONEY???"

Evens mum and isaks mum head canons, Listen someone write a fic where their families have a get together @cz where r u- there is no way to summarise what's happening it's actual chaos.

SHOLA FOLIGH AWAY, more crispy wilhelmmy faces, they never end, will we ever be free? Chris and Eva the new FOLGERS commercial - Dani is leaving to EAT GOOD THINGs - like snakes aka venom!???, HANDS, Evaks hands, who cares about SEX scenes we want hand holding, THERE WAS NO SEX SCENS DISCOURSE GOT TO IRONIC

3pm- PORNHUB talk, dick talk, are dicks ugly or not, what did ISAK do in the shower in ep8, how do ppl not read the texts between clips, Faiza coming for us all with even giving ESKILD sex advice and tips, Rhae throws holy water- OH How THE TURN TABLES, Eskild even Isak hitting gay bars head canons, kitchen sex ftw, they fucked in the kitchen after 5 fine frøkner #confirmed,ILL TATTOO MANNEN I MITT LIV ON MY FOREHEAD, NSFW headcanons: Even probably makes dick jokes while they have sex, probably goes "the millennium falcon isn't the only thing that comes in less than 12 parsecs" when he's close and isak just goes wtf Honestly I can summarise this its just filth about EVAK sex are we any better than the chrispy fan girls!?

just all around terrible EVAK sex headcanons to Justin beibers baby. DONT LOOK AT ME I AM IN THE SHAMECUBE.

Evens SEX playlist;

- My anaconda - nicki - Baby my Justin beiber - Talk dirty to me - Take U down by Chris brown - Lots of years and years

Praise kink Isak, its it's just filth for an hour plus about EVAK sex I'm not gonna lie, ISAK likes scarves because they cover them hickeys

4pm- Faiza telling us a cute EVAK In School making out behind closed class room door, Shola and RHAE span crispy, even tongue is not alone anymore hi isaks tongue, why is this chat so filthy we all need Jesus, multiple holy water GIFS, ocean gif, penetrator ET, HALLA after sex, DAF and Zaa livetexting the awful sleeping beauty fic , let's never speak of it again, more shitting on eyewitness, Talking about good shows, watch merli, the get down,sense8,

5pm- s4 NRK poll, skam saved 2016 y'all, so many feelings, getting pretty sappy, love all y'all, skam as a good and bad coping mechanism the discourse, from dicks to feelings: and EVAK story, even4s4 discourse for the tusen time, crispy Kreme roasting, season 4 trailer contemplation, 8th Jan at 21:21 WHAT LIES, also u; waiting t 21/22 8th Jan refreshing the site,

6pm- we are all hot AF #confirmed, the tollness vs smolness debate, we are all dating now it is decided, crushes and how to flirt, EVAK yoga store, COUPLES yoga, ASK OLD ESKILD typo I love to regret My life, more love life talk, let's take desperate to a whole new level of EVAK could do it so can we

7pm- Evens bipolar diagnosis discourse, fandom before and after ep8 on the subject, bitch we guessed it we was RIGHT, wlw on skam pls, attacking VILDUS smh, vilde Magnus sexuality debate TBH, WILLHELM NOSE CANT FIT INTO CHRISPEE's MOUTH, never gets ask old, look at that washboard ass, crispy again, will we ever be free of crispy, TRIGGERED WILHELMY AND CRISPY

8pm- quotes for edits, poems and writing such talent here u guys

9pm: fic talk, finally the mermaid fic link (http://archiveofourown.org/works/9111700/chapters/20710825), why is there tarjei David friendship discourse why, why are ppl so gross!?,

10pm- hating women who get IinThe way of m/m ships PLS DONT, why must ppl invalidate even and isaks sexualities?, 11pm- all quite on the western front TBH