#[i guess I should tag it in case everyone hadn't read the last books?]

[ack3rlady]

The Universe Had His Back - Chapter 5

Sunrise

Summary: The aftermath of the breathtaking encounter between reader and Levi when true feelings are revealed

Chapters: Four | Five | Six

Master List

Warnings: Fem! Reader, Angst, Fluff, Modern AU, Reference to alcohol abuse, slight swearing.

Word Count: ~ 2.5k

Inspiration: Starry Night - Suho

Tags: @sooibian, @queenofcurse, @red-n-tall ; Anyone else who'd like to be tagged, please let me know!

You accepted Levi’s offer to drive you home, a decision you would come to regret the moment the car was in motion. The journey was quiet, with you mostly looking out of the window as he drove. Your greed for more time with him that you didn’t account for how dejected you would go on to feel once the adrenaline dried out. You hadn't exactly ended things with him on amicable terms. The ride home in his company just added salt to the unhealed wounds. Levi turned his head towards you several times like he wanted to say something, but didn't.

“How’s Luna?”, your words finally cut through the silence, voice low and shaky.

“She’s fine. Isabel stayed at home with her today.”, he responded, eyes focused on the road.

Then it was quiet again. It took all the strength to bottle up the multitude of emotions building up within you that were burning to be expressed. So, you decided to focus your attention on the row of lush green trees along the sidewalk, whirring past you.

Levi quelled his desire to lay his hand on yours more than once; intertwining your fingers snugly together while you ran soothing circles on the back of his palm - something he always did while driving with you by his side.

‘Old habits die hard’, he thought. Neither of you uttered a word again till your apartment building was around the corner. You sat glued to your seat, unmoving even after he parked.

“You know that you could just come see her, right? She asks about you every day.”, Levi’s gaze was still fixed on the car parked in front of his own, his voice barely audible.

You sighed, feeling ashamed for depriving your own baby of your presence.

“I’m not ready. What if I can't keep it together in front of her? I need to get better before she sees me.” you despaired, looking down at your feet, too afraid of the effect on Luna if she saw you like this.

“I’m going to be right there with you. And how do you expect to get any better if you deny yourself the exact person who is capable of making you feel so?”, Levi turned in his seat to face you, placing a firm hand on your shoulder.

He was right. Of course, Luna was the only one who could pull you out of this abyss. Why had you been running away from her this whole time?

“C-Can I come see her after work tomorrow?”, you squeaked.

“You don’t have to ask. We’ll both be waiting for you.”, he whispered moving his hand to rest on top of yours.

You finally mustered up the courage to look towards him. He wore the same smile on his face that you had been in love with for the last eight years; the exact one that always assured you that everything was going to be okay.

.

Reader’s POV

You entered your apartment and laid the shopping bags on the counter. Taking off your shoes, you placed them neatly on the rack by the door, taking a little step towards keeping the word you gave Miche this morning. It was late in the evening; the Sun having just set. You glanced around your gloomy apartment, at the dark shadows and how even the brightest colored paints and fabrics looked somber in the dusk’s dullness. The eeriness of the space was starting to eat at you when something shiny on the kitchen platform caught your eye. It was a bottle of whiskey, its amber liquid gleaming in the residual rays of light entering through the window.

The conflict in your head began as you started walking towards it absentmindedly. Was tonight going to be the same as the other wretched ones of the last two weeks? Faces of Luna, Levi, Miche and Nanaba flashed before our eyes as you inched towards the humble kitchenette. Finally at your destination, you picked up the bottle and stared at it, putting up a hard fight against the demons in your head.

You jumped when the door to your apartment suddenly slammed open, making the bottle almost slip out of your hands.

"Sweets!", A loud voice called out to you, the light from the window reflecting off the intruder’s glasses.

It was a moniker given to you by your dear friend based on "your profession and character" as they liked to call it. But the truth was, it was a part of the 'couple name' they had created for you and Levi called 'Short and Sweet', earning them a few punches from the holder of the other half of the title.

“Hange, you almost gave me a heart attack! What are you doing barging into my apartment like this?”, you grumbled.

“Well, your door was unlocked. So, how was your run in with Shorty? Tell me everyth... What the fuck is that?”, they began with excitement, but it dissipated as soon as they switched the lights on and spotted what you held in your hands.

You looked like a thief caught in the act. Guilty.

“It-It's nothing. I wasn’t drinking it.”, you stuttered, hastily putting it away.

“You mean you hadn't started drinking it yet?”

They were probably right. That’s how your evenings usually began these days. You tried your hardest to conquer the need for a drink, only to eventually give in and ending up passed out somewhere in your apartment.

Your train of thought was interrupted by a knock. Miche and Nanaba tiptoed inside through the still unlocked door with guilty smiles, as if ready to turn on their heels in case if you decided to chase after them.

“So? How did it go with Ackermann?”, they asked eagerly in unison.

“Wait. Was my day broadcasted in the news or something? How do you already know?”, your face had a giant question mark stamped on it.

“Who do you think brought it all together?”, Hange grinned, proudly wiggling their eyebrows.

You furrowed yours, and audibly gasped seconds later when it hit you. The sequence of events played before your eyes; how each person you had seen today and led to you meeting Levi. First Miche and Nanaba, then Suki. Your jaw slacked, and you gaped at each one of them in complete disbelief at what they had just pulled off.

Miche quietly slithered to position himself closely beside you and wrapped his arm around your shoulders – a little too tight. Well, you were contemplating introducing their jaws to your fist, so you guessed he was just being cautious.

“Who else knew of this?”, you hissed.

“Not Shorty, if that’s what you’re asking. I cooked up the idea. But it was Erwin who played commander and assigned roles! Everything from you and Levi having the same day off work, Suki and Furlan pestering you two into going with them, Nanaba and Miche forcing you out of here, Isabel staying home with Luna so that Levi could leave, and now us being here to witness the success of our little project, it was brought together by him. In fact, Erwin is checking in on Levi as we speak!”, Hange exclaimed triumphantly.

You felt stupid after finding out that you and Levi got played by practically everyone you knew. How were they this good at keeping it under wraps?

“Why did you do this?” You asked.

“Because you are both too stupid realize how crazy you are about each other and how this estrangement is paining you. So, we just decided to nudge you in the right direction. You’re welcome, by the way!”, Nanaba grinned.

“What are you even talking about? He’s the one who willingly ended what we had.”, you despaired.

The memories of the months preceding the divorce were fresh in your mind. Levi couldn’t stand being in the same room as you for more than a few minutes at a time, constantly falling out with you over something or the other. You remembered how much it hurt when he always seemed irritated by your sheer presence.

“Rubbish! You should know by now that Shorty is a complete moron with his feelings. Don’t you remember how long he stalled asking you out on a date all those years ago? And also, how I finally had to ask you for him? This is history repeating itself, silly!”, Hange chuckled, gently flicking your forehead

“Erwin and I see him every day, Sweets. We know how much he regrets letting you go. But he’s too much of a chicken to do anything about it. We’ve been badgering him to reconnect with you for a while now. But he was terrified of making a move. The dumbass is utterly in love with you. Precisely why Erwin and I decided to take matters in our own hands.”, they stated matter of factly.

The barrage of information caught you completely off guard. But you couldn’t help but dwell on one detail in particular -

“He’s still in love with me?”

.

Levi’s POV

Levi felt restless on the drive back home, aimlessly fidgeting with his seatbelt and rapidly tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. He was worried about you. Well, he always was, but more so because of what happened today. He suppressed the constant urges to turn his car around and return to you because he needed to get home to Luna and relieve Isabel of her baby-sitting duties.

He parked the car in the driveway and walked through the front door, momentarily freezing upon seeing a tall blonde man seated on the couch with Luna half asleep on his lap, immediately relaxing after recognizing who it was. He was reading her a story from one of the many books you had bought while Isabel was lounging on the loveseat beside them, her face glowing under the light from her phone screen. All three turned to Levi upon hearing the jingling of his keys.

“Papa!”, the little one was refreshed by the sight. She ran to greet her father by wiggling her way off the man’s lap and on to the floor and hugged is leg.

“Hi, moon beam! Erwin, what are you doing here?”, he asked as he gave Luna a kiss and then looked up at the man.

“I’m here to check in on you. How was your meeting with uh... ahem?”, Erwin cleared his throat instead of mentioning your name in the toddler’s presence.

“Check in on me? How do you know about that? What did you do?”, Levi’s temper audibly rose with each question.

“I’m going to tuck Luna into bed, and you are going to wait right here for my return. We need to have a little chat.” he glowered at the taller blonde before he could answer, ignoring the sheepish smile slapped across his little sister’s face.

Luna was out cold the moment her head rested on the pillow given how worn out she was after horsing around with Isabel all day. Additionally, story time with Erwin already had her feeling drowsy by the time Levi had returned home. Ten minutes and a few goodnight kisses later, he was sitting at the dining table with the two adults, sipping tea that Erwin had just brewed.

“When do you plan to start telling me what is going on? I could have had dinner during the wait.”, he jibed.

“I take it that Suki and Furlan were successful in bringing you two face-to-face?”, Erwin’s tone was casual, maintaining steady eye contact with his old friend.

He proceeded to explain in great detail, how he and Hange worked with both your close friends to hatch this plan.

“Can’t you two keep your eyebrows and shitty glasses out of my fucking business?”, Levi growled.

“Since you both can’t communicate like mature adults and figure things out for yourselves, we had to step in as catalysts. Hange is at her apartment right now, making sure she’s okay.”, Erwin kept his defense short.

Levi was at a loss of words. Sometimes he felt like he wasn’t worthy of his two friends. Hange and Erwin always went out of their way for him when he was hit with a challenging situation, and all he ever did was snivel about it.

“Fine. I’ll give you both credit where you deserve it. I had been wanting to see her myself. But I didn’t know what to say. She is coming over tomorrow to see Luna. So, thanks, I guess.”

Erwin knew that this was the closest thing to an apology and appreciation that he was going to get from Levi. So, he took it with a smile.

“Awesome!”, Isabel's scream cut through the calmness.

“And you.”, his fiery gaze landed on her at the far end of the table where she strategically seated herself away from the reach of her older brother in case if he was particularly irked. “I’m going to take care of Furlan later. But you too are hiding things from me now?”,

“Hey! I was just following Erwin's orders! And how could I say no to having my favorite person all to myself for an entire day?”, she reasoned, her face resembling a cartoon cat that Luna was fond of; Puss in Boots, was it?

“So, how did it go?”, Erwin intervened before Levi could scold her further.

Levi took a minute to gather his thoughts. Images of your face flashed before his eyes, making his tense posture relax significantly.

“I - I don’t even know how to describe it. I feel like for the first time in forever, I might sleep well tonight just because I met her. She looked so beautiful.”, his lips showed signs of the smallest smile as he ran his fingers along the rim of his teacup, gazing at the dark liquid contained within.

He quickly composed himself after realizing that he had in fact just said these words out loud and they were not just in his head, but it was too late. Isabel oohed with amusement and yelped after receiving a flying spoon to the head from him.

“It was also... a stark reminder of what an absolute piece of shit I have been to throw away everything we had. She’s in so much pain.”, his softened expression clearly revealed the despair behind his words.

“As are you, Levi. You made a grave mistake. Unfortunately, you're not the only one who is paying for it. But there is no use lamenting over the past, is there? What counts is what you plan to do now. Have you decided what you will say to her when she visits?”

Levi let out a long, suffering sigh. “I regretted what I did the moment I came back to an empty home from the court that day, Erwin. Seeing her today only reaffirmed how shitty my life is without her. I need to win her back. I’m afraid she’ll reject me after what I did to her. But - But she still needs to know that I -

I’m still in love with her.”

Chapters: Four | Five | Six

[sweetwriting]

Kon has always been the mom

Category : Gen

Genre : Angst/Fluff

Fandoms : DC Comics, Teen Titans v3 (2003)

Prompt : Tim and Kon acting as Bart’s parents

Summary : Tim seems really down, Bart wants to cheer him up but it doesn't go as planned. As always, Kon is very perceptive and has actually started to mature enough to somewhat understand what's going on, kind of.

Author’s notes : I tag this as TimKon but you’ll only find it if you squint very hard. It’s more like pre-slash I guess. This happens right avec Stephanie Brown and Jack Drake’s deaths

Word Count : 1941

You can find it on AO3

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 Bart was bored. Like really, really bored.

  He had finished both his and Superboy's homework and Conner hadn't even deigned do anything than stare at Cassie's....pretty eyes (yeah right, like Bart would believe that).   He had read a lot in the past couple of hours (which actually seemed like days to him, but hey, a speedster has to adapt his internal clock to the outside world) but he needed a change of pace....and human interactions. Sadly, because of the mission they had finished earlier, almost everyone had fallen asleep while he was busy reading a strangely interesting collection of Art History books (more specifically, animal deities and humans represented as animals (deities) between ~ 4000 BC and ~600 AD... There was some really weird stuff in there and there was an actual Scorpion King even if the Return of the Mummy didn't get anything other than the name right, on that note the anime watcher in him laughed endlessly -well for him- at the fact that Egypt also had had an actual Prince Baka).

  So there was nothing to do besides, maybe, bothering Tim…Who might actually need it. The other/new/girl (?) Robin had disappeared during the week and he's not an idiot (he also knows how Tim became Robin in the first place even if not in details), since Spoiler/Girl!Robin hasn't reappeared (he actually checked, he has spent a lot of time with Tim after all) and there's no new vigilante in Gotham so chances are she's either hurt or undercover somewhere (or dead but he'd rather not think about that)? In any case, Tim probably needs some cheering up (though if he's honest with himself, they all do. Tim's just a bigger case to work on).

  But what to do? The last time he tried to cheer up one of his teammates had been when Kon had lost his powers back in their Young Justice days. He couldn't do it yet these days had been a lot more happy (though when he thought about it back then Kon hadn't just lost his powers but also Tana and while thinking about how a newborn/16 years old Kon was in a relationship with a clearly adult woman now felt slightly creepy, there was no denying that she had been really important to him, just like Rob might have to deal with something having happened to his (ex?) girlfriend)...Ah…Considering how his cheering Kon up had turned out he was probably not gonna be able to get Tim's head out of his ass (also he might get killed). After all it had ended up pretty badly.

  Then again if there's someone who can cheer Tim up it's Bart! (Well, actually, it might be Conner but while he probably noticed Tim wasn't at his best, he's been trying to give Tim some space and not force him to talk too much. Bart knows because Conner had asked him to help in distracting him from confronting Rob…And Conner had little patience and there was Cassie and…Huh…now that he thinks about it maybe there's a link there…Anyway Conner may not be as intelligent as Tim or himself (well he kinda is…just…in a very different way) but that's because he's more of an intuition kind of person. But while he's getting better at using it efficiently, while he realizes something is wrong he doesn't always know what is.

  So…What to do? What to do? Get Tim mad at him? Probably not a good idea (even if there's like a 90% chance that's how it'll end up…That and a lecture…After all Conner has been a master at annoying Tim since their first meeting and he taught Bart well).

  Maybe ask him to work on something together?  But what ? After All, while Tim's widely more intelligent than he is, Bart 's still sufficiently intelligent (more than that to be honest) to not need help (or to have already asked if he did)…Plus while Tim might have understood his explanation building stuff's not really his thing (though he could have proposed ideas to make it better…maybe) so it probably wouldn't have worked anyway.

  So yeah…he's kinda stumped.

  Or maybe if he's …? Yep quick check and Conner's still ogling Cassie (Bart still thinks it's a little weird that, like, half of the time Conner gives his attention to Cassie it's (in)directly related to Tim but this thought has little chances of being well receive….by anyone so, like most of his thoughts on the matter of his friends' (sorta) relationships, he's gonna try to forget about it). So yeah, Conner's not gonna be of any help.

  Tim was starting to get a headache, a Bache, a Bart-Induced headache. They were a special kind that had developed after months of hanging out with Bart on a regular basis. And for the past five minutes Bart has been passing through the room while stopping behind the armchair Tim is slumped in for a second and then disappearing, only to come back every few second and doing the same again and again and again.

  And Tim, well, he can't say he was actually working on his laptop unless you count staring at it blankly working. Steph was dead and so was his dad.  He hadn't been able to help them, much less save them. Hell in his father's case he had been at least partially responsible. They were…. And Dana was…she was…not well and she hadn't adopted him anyway so it's not like he could have gone with her even if she hadn't…And he had until the end of the week-end to find a solution to his situation.  And why oh why does Bart keep on doing that? It's distracting and Tim doesn't have the time to deal with it! So if he wants Tim to know about something that badly he should just come out and say it :

"OH MY GOD BART! Just stay still and tell me why you're bothering me!" he said, raising his voice in annoyance.

  At which point he looked up, at Bart's face. Bart who was trying and failing to hide his crushed face (because while he had gotten better at hiding his emotions, he was still Bart and face it, anyone who had known Impulse!Bart couldn't be fooled by his newly acquired -and far from mastered- skills). And okay, maybe Bart had been right not to engage him.  Also Bart was gone now and if he tried to look for him on the feed from his laptop…and found him, intercepted by Conner, who's hugging him…and looks mad…Yeah he probably deserves what's coming.

"TIM!"

  Yep, there stands Superboy, in all his (furious) glory, hands on the hips. Shoulders bending his upper body slightly toward Tim, towering over him, his frowny face promising a big lecture. Kon really was the mom, he hadn't been joking when he had first said that…Well okay he kind of was joking but he was also partly serious.  It wasn't often that Conner had the moral high ground over him. It used to be because of his immaturity but since the last Bedlam debacle (and that awful war) -when Steph had been Robin and Harm hadn't killed Greta and Kon was an adorably puny nerd and Steph *was Robin* (to be fair he had also been puny but a lot less than Kon- it had been because they were on a more equal standing and actually communicated so there wasn't any high ground to have.   But Tim had obviously upset Bart and he should know better because if the roles had been reversed he'd be planning Conner's destruction (OK, maybe not, but he'd plan a very humiliating revenge plot…Maybe).

"Look. I don't know what's going on but it doesn't give you the right to treat others" Bart "Like they're nothing!" Kon yells.  Direct as always, he's actually going easy on Tim. Probably because they both know Conner has just kickstarted Tim's internal lecture system.

"Tim…" he started again, more gently this time, only to be interrupted:

"I know. I realized as soon as I said it, ok. I wanted to apologize immediately but between Bart's speed and yours I didn't have the time."

  Now he just needed to find Bart…and get out of the protective arms of the corner he had chosen to make his nest at.  He could feel Conner looking at him, frown still in place but anger replaced with worry. And damn he didn't want that. Conner was his best friend but he didn't want to burden him just because he had trouble dealing with death. He also couldn't hurt Bart because of it.   So he ignored Conner the best he could while trying to look for Bart (again) on the feed of his computer. Conner just sighed and went to find Bart who had luckily just come back from a run (where? Somewhere Max Mercury related probably and wasn't that a whole can of worms in itself?) and looked calmer, if still wary, when Conner escorted him protectively to the living room where Tim was still hiding.  He quickly got up and ran to Bart, stopping a few centimeters from him, hands hesitating before falling solidly on the younger boy's shoulders.

"I'm so sorry Bart, I just. I'm not…Some things happened and, well I took it on you and I shouldn't have. I'm really sorry."  This was the most heartfelt Tim had been in a while and he was almost proud of it.

  Whether Bart had decided to forgive him before his apology or his speedster brain weighed the pros and cons of accepting his apology right after (or Bart decided to forgive him on the spur of the moment), he ended up jumping into Tim's arms for less than a second (Tim barely felt the hug but he wanted more of it) and gave Tim a small smile. All was forgiven and they started moving toward the couch. Conner was still frowning slightly but he smiled back at them only a few moments later (as if to make sure there was no issue left between them) before joining them on the couch, on Bart.

"You are so the mom".

  Oops. Tim had apparently slipped up. Bart looked surprised and speechless (they had the "argument" because Bart had just sped off after all), but then a sly smile made its appearance on his face.

"Hey you're right! Conner's totally the mom!". He shouted excitedly.

  Conner, whose cheeks had started to redden and was glaring dagger at Tim, became redder and started glaring at Bart too so that Bart felt the need to defend himself:

"C'mon Conner you're like the nurturer and protector! That's totally what moms are!"

  Tim smiled slightly as he started to list the "nurturing" types of behaviors Conner had shown to corroborate Bart's statement while Bart looked at them, happy to have distracter Tim (even slightly) and he started falling asleep, listening to his best friends' bickering, smiling slightly more when he felt Conner lifting him up (with his famous TTK, luckily Tim must have glared at him because Conner stopped before he even began talking about it) and to his room where he deposited him on his bed, took off his boots and pulled the covers over his body while Tim joined them and they both messed with Bart's hair, patted him on the head and temples before turning his light off and closing the door, leaving him to a few hours of blissful sleep.

_______________________________________________________________

Author’s note part 2 : I hope I did Bart justice. Because of his Speed and unique growth he acts more like an hyperactive child than any other speedster has, but at the same time he has started gaining on maturity by that point in time (also I'm mad that they made him go darker instead of trying to simply keep on making him mature bit by bit), plus Bart is one of the most intelligent characters of this generation so I wanted to be able to show both. That's why I tried to write him in a way that shows a speed of thoughts where it can seem kinda jumbled because he makes a lot of connections.As for Tim, he's a special blender of PTSD and Depression (canonically), and most likely Anxiety, Boarding School Syndrom and, as of his father's death, survivor's guilt (granted it was viable until Kon's death) and all other secondary effect of having your parents leave you for unknown periods of times like lack of empathy and 0 Self-Esteem. (and probably Borderline Personality Disorder, but I'm not completely sure about that one...It'd fit though). So with this plus his recent grief and Tim usually being fairly prone to irritation and anger, I tried to make it realistic without being too aggressive.Finally Kon is a very nurturing person if an arrogant one *cough*over compensation because few people wanted him and those who did left/died*cough*. Kon is a very perceptive character but due to his relative youth he doesn't know how to interpret his perceptions, it's something I wish had been explored more, but anyway. Kon is a very loving and nurturing person and by the beginning of Teen Titans he had started really assuming this role especially toward Tim and Bart. And here he's worried about Bart of course, but he also knows how repressed Tim is and if he lashed out, especially at Bart then it means something's wrong (but he's willing to give Tim a bit of space for Tim to talk to him on his own...he doesn't have that big of a patience and Tim can be very stubborn though so he might want to ask him later ? But then canon catches up to them and Tim's forced to talk about his father (and not Steph because ? ).

Also the stuff on Egypt 100% true. There was an actual Prince Baka (that’s how I learned at least half of the Ancient Egypt Speciality of the Ecole du Louvre of the 2011-2012 years was made of weeaboos)

[1358456]

Considering everything, do you blame the Qing Dynasty for the occupation of Korea? As a Chinese, it is still quite ridiculous that the Qing Dynasty was very behind in technology and weak but albeit needed for the Xinhai Revolution.

Do I blame Qing (淸)? No. It goes MUCH further back. The occupation was a result of Korea just being flat out weaker than Japan.

Beware. MASSIVE rant.

The TL;DR version is that the existence of China itself f*cked us over, so there's no one single pin-pointing. I believe I once said that Korean history is basically just one disaster after another. ... That's quite accurate.

During the Han (漢) Dynasty, Korea had its own three kingdoms era. Unlike the Chinese one that lasted... 100 years (and that's being generous), the Korean one lasted... what, 700 years? And the way I see it, that is when the tragedy began, and Korea was set to be f*cked non-stop ever since then.

Of the three Korean kingdoms, the northern one had most of current day Manchuria and the strongest army. The southeastern one had STRONG influence in Japan. And the southwestern one had nothing. And because THAT particular kingdom unified Korea (year... 713?), Japan now claims that THEY had influence on the southeastern Korean kingdom, and China now claims that the northern Korean kingdom is actually Chinese history, thus all territory owned by that kingdom should belong to China. That includes a vast majority of current day North Korea. And all that bullsh*t began with pretty much the Chinese Tang (唐) Dynasty, which was... what, 1400 years ago?

And the real tragedy is this. Because that weak Korean kingdom unified Korea with the help of the Tang Dynasty, China claimed superiority over Korea. If Korea ever refused anything ordered by China, here comes the f*cking endless waves of soldiers down from our literally ONLY border. Which also means, if China orders an attack on Japan, Korea is forced to tag along and lose pretty much every soldier to the tidal waves and hurricanes that occur frequently thanks to Japan's unstable-as-sh*t tectonic placement. There's a reason why Japanese suicide troops are called kamikaze (神風). God wind. They believed that a wind god protected them from invaders. And when any "enemy of China" seeks to attack China, we're also targeted.

So what does that mean? Korea is forced to accept China as a superior. Everything China is superior. Everything non-China is worthless or savage. When Mongolia attacked China, they also attacked Korea because we were forced to take China's side. When Ming (明) Dynasty began to rise to drive out the "savages" (元), Korea also had the rise of the latest dynasty (1392). And immediately were forced to accept China as superior. Again. It's like Canada - US relations, but a LOT worse.

Why was Korea always forced to serve China? Because if we don't they attack. Remember when I said that there's nothing I hate more than someone or something being super arrogant and rude because they think they're stronger than you? Guess where that originated from. Some low ass ranking Chinese f*ck standing tall while every high ranking Korean officials have to grovel as that Chinese guy demands bribes and bitches about how the "last bribes" were "not up to expectations"...

Many years later, when Japan unified their lands (1590) and immediately attacked Korea with 200 000 troops armed with western weapons (1592), the lord of Tsushima (which was always Korean territory, but since it was so far away from mainland Korea, no one lived there, so Japanese pirates took over and is now Japanese territory) came to Korea to warn of the invasion. But Korean king was forced to avoid meeting that messenger because China considered Japan to be worthless savages, and if Korea dealt with Japanese people, they'd also consider us to be equal worthless savages. And here comes endless waves again. Result? Korea remained unaware of the invasion, and... a 7 year's war that resulted in the total loss of a sh*tload of historic structures including the main palace. And the Chinese "reinforcements" that came refused to fight and instead tried to work out a peace treaty that involved Korea giving up half of its territory to Japan. Yes. So very f*cking helpful. So very helpful that we should repay in kind.

When Ming Dynasty was ending thanks to "savages", they forced Korea to help. The Korean king that tried to "help" like China did ("observe the situation and help only if Ming will win the war. If Ming appears to be losing, then just return home and let things take their course") got deposed and the idiot next king tried to help Ming. So, when Ming died out very quickly and the "savages" of 金 (soon to be 淸) took over, we were immediately on hostile terms. And they attacked. Twice. And we were forced to serve them. Then the Japanese Empire came along and... the late 1800s began which resulted in the end of the Korean dynasty in 1910.

Why was China behind in tech? Because they considered everything non-Chinese to be uncultured and barbaric. So they never even bothered with western people. And Korea, being forced to accept China as the only superior (in fact, Korean officials had to know EVERYTHING about Chinese history to be even considered educated), we were also forced to reject westerners. So when Japan came along armed with western stuff, we're f*cked. But since Korea is much smaller and has far less people, AND we happened to be smack in the middle between China and Japan, we're the ones that got royally f*cked.

And here's the more annoying part. After two nuclear detonations in 1945, Japan was f*cked. They were econonically totally screwed. You know what saved them and helped them become #2 strongest country in the world (at the time)? The Korean War in 1950. Our misery f*cking helped them. You know what else happened at that time? South was winning thanks to General McArthur. The war was almost over and we could've had a unified Korea again. Then the Chinese came to help the North with the f*cking endless waves. It's like another stabbing from one side, and a severe insult to injury from the other. And thanks to that, we now have North Korea and a potential nuclear disaster if they ever decide "f*ck it". Again, we're the ones that got f*cked. The only consolation is that North Korea seems to like aiming the missiles at Japan. Japan already experienced three nuclear explosions (two nuclear strikes in 1945 and that one cesium reactor that went kablooey). Surely a fourth can be handled.

So basically, Korean history in a nutshell is a small country that has a HUGE fat one constantly bullying it, and another not-nearly-as-big-but-stronger one in the other side constantly trying to stab the fat one, but stabbing us instead. 大韓民國? Try 大恨民國. Maybe that's why the Korean language has SO MANY CURSES. The rage of our ancestors lie within our language. If Korea can't fight back, then at least we can out-swear China and Japan. Especially Japan since they don't really have any curses. What are they going to do? Call us an idiot? Pff.

Heh. Still makes me laugh when I think about that one Chinese girl who was SO SURE that Korea was always a friend to China. Though to be fair, back when I hadn't actually looked at Korean history, I thought Korea and China were on good terms too. Then I actually read some history, and... damn. Friends, huh? What a joke.

Heh. "Friends" mean that the stronger one does NOT send people to the weaker one every f*cking year demanding hefty bribes, treating everyone like dirt, and then demanding dozens of Korean girls to take back to China as concubines. Before coming back next year to demand more. And more. And more. Repeat for 1400 years. And the forcefully dragged Korean girls never see their family or home country ever again. Gee, I wonder why Korean population never really increased.

Oh, a new year? Korea has to send a VERY high ranking messenger to say "Happy New Year!" (pretty much) to the Chinese emperor. Who then in return sends a very LOW ranked messenger who demands bribes and Korean girls. And in return for that, we have to send another high ranking messenger to deliver a "thank you". Whenever Korea appoints a queen, crown prince, princess, or a king succeeds the predecessor? We have to get PERMISSION first. Friends, huh? Bullsh*t. They treated us worse than dirt and everyone knew it.

I'm actually very certain that China has caused FAR more damage to Korea than Japan did. And Japan caused a LOT of f*cking damage in the 1900s. And the only reason why that is sort of ignored is because the most recent incident was the Japanese occupation, so Korea just hates Japan more. The Korean War is a bit... ambiguous in that regard because it was technically US vs. Russia that just f*cked us over and not anyone else.

... Sigh. History rambles... This is why whenever I read a Korean history book, I stop reading after a certain point. Reading beyond that just makes my blood boil.

But of course, what's important now is... what do I think? Do I hate Chinese people or Japanese people? No. I hate the countries, definitely. China still keeps f*cking us over every year with the freaking sand/smog storm that originates from China that reaches us in spring time but doesn't quite reach Japan (...). The least it could've done was f*ck Japan too, but nope. As always, it just f*cks us. And Japan is still trying to inch their way into taking more Korean territory. But the people... no. It all depends on my first impression on them, and I don't have negative experiences with either people. I'm staying away from Chinese markets and restaurants though. No need to ruin the impression. I've heard from my mom how unbearably rude Chinese people can be. And I've also read plenty of cases in the history books. But I haven't personally experienced it and I'd rather not. And for Japanese, I've only ever met one and she was really nice. Though I guess it's a bit inaccurate since she was born in Canada.