#[ which is honestly pretty sad but Molly just keeps on trying....because she thinks 'oh maybe this one will be the one' ]

[bubblcgumbaby]

   just saying Molly is the ‘pining and oblivious slowburn friends to lovers’ trope where it’s painful as all hell to watch and you feel bad because my god would she just ASK or SAY SOMETHING??? 

   but Molly is very much...a little dense, and...she’s had a lot of issues with being tricked and teased growing up, so she never likes to just assume anyone would actually feel romantically towards her. She’s Friendzone Central. if you want to date her you have to grab her and look her in her pretty little brown eyes and say clearly and concisely WOULD YOU GO ON A ROMANTIC DATE WITH ME??? because will REFUSE to think it’s anything but platonic otherwise, even if she is madly in love with you.

[heytherejulietx]

Secrets ~ Fred Weasley

Masterlists

Requests are OPEN

Notes - Omg this is the longest one that I’ve done but I’m super proud of this!!!!

Warnings - Mentions of alcoholism and verbal abuse.

Word count - 3.1k.

Fred couldn't know about her home situation. 

That was the one thing that Y/N made herself stick to once she'd started dating the Weasley boy - that he wouldn't have to know. Honestly, she had never seen any pros in him knowing. She would just be giving him a cause to worry about her whilst she was away from him, and she hated seeing him worry. It was so unlike Fred to be concerned. So unlike him to not be wearing a huge boyish grin or laughing about something that had been said. She wouldn't forgive herself if she had been the reason he'd stopped smiling.

Every time he'd ever asked about her family, she'd just brushed it aside. Giving excuses like "oh, my dad's really not that interesting" or "my mum's just always busy with work, Freddie, she's so boring" and that would be all that was said about it before she managed to swerve the conversation into a different direction.

Fred was suspicious, obviously. He was an extremely bright and perceptive boy, so he could tell when he was constantly being lied to. He knew she was lying, and she knew he knew that she was lying. And there were things she did that just made him suspicious, too. At first he'd pushed it off as her just being jumpy, after noticing her flinch at some sudden noises. But Fred grew a little more concerned when seeing her get nervous whenever someone was yelling or got too close to her. Though he'd never brought it up. If there was one thing that Fred was exceptionally well at, it was respecting boundaries. He'd never in a million years go one centimetre over her line, and she wouldn't his. It just wasn't even something that ever crossed their mind. They knew each other well enough to know where to stop, and they did. Every time.

So Fred had never asked her about it. Though it was always in the back of her mind if he knew. Of course, there was no way he possibly could, but it didn't stop her from worrying. Had he seen the letter she'd sent home to her mum? Had he somehow heard about it from someone? Did he know?

But of course, he didn't.

So, when the conversation of the Christmas holidays was brought up, he didn't think much of her asking to spend it with his family. In fact, he was pretty damn pleased by the idea.

"Freddie?" Y/N had asked one cold November night. The both of them had snuck out of their respective dorms to meet in the Gryffindor common room, enjoying their company by the warm glow of the fire that kept them from getting chills in the cold night. She was sat in between his legs with both of theirs stretched out across the sofa, her back leaning against his chest whilst his was leaning against the armrest.

"Hmm?" The ginger boy hummed in response, one arm tightly wrapped around her middle whilst he used his free arm to run his hand up and down her arm.

"What are you doing for Christmas?" She asked, biting her bottom lip before elaborating. "I mean, obviously you'll be with your family. I just mean... would it change too many of your plans if I joined you all?"

Fred's hand stopped moving along her arm. For a short moment she suspected that he was trying to think of a way to tell her no, though when she'd shifted a little to turn and look at him she spotted a huge smile over his features that warmed her more than the fire ever could.

"You want to spend Christmas with me, love?" He inquired.

"Yeah," She smiled almost bashfully as she nodded her head. "Only if your family's okay with it, though." She told him.

"Of course they'll be fine with it!" Fred told her excitedly. "Mum's been eager to meet you for bloody ages, she'd love to have you here for Christmas. And so would I, for that matter. It'd be great, love." He smiled, leaning forwards to press a kiss to her lips, letting his happiness bleed into the action as he smiled against her lips.

So the following month, when all students were packing to go to their homes, Y/N packed her own trunk and headed off with Fred to The Burrow - a place she'd only ever heard about. Though no measure of imagination could compare to the real thing.

"Wow." She whispered in awe as she stared up at the tall building, her hand in Fred's as the much lankier boy stood beside her. "This is incredible, you grew up here?" She smiled as she looked back at him.

"Yep, all my life. It's not all that much on the inside, but it's home." The boy shrugged his shoulders as he stepped forwards, his much larger hand still keeping a hold of hers as he moved to open the door of the house, stepping inside and pulling her with him.

The first thing she got about the house was that it was warm. It wasn't just the nice heat coming from the house, though. The atmosphere itself was warm and comforting - like sleeping in bedsheets that had just been washed, or having a nice hot bath on a cold day. It was homey.

Before she could focus on the house too much, George had stepped into her line of sight, a grin over his features as he stepped forwards to bring her into a hug.

"Hey it's my favourite twin!" Y/N smirked a little into the taller boy's shoulder as she'd hugged him, giggling quietly when she heard both Fred's falsely offended gasp and George's chuckle.

"We all know I've always been more superior than Freddie." George smirked over at Fred once he'd pulled away from the hug.

"Second place is still decent though, love." She told her boyfriend, giggling quietly as she slid her arms around Fred's waist.

"Yeah yeah, whatever. George is much bloody worse than I am." Fred huffed playfully, shooting a joking glare over at George before slinging his arm over Y/N’s shoulder once George had walked off. “Plus, I’m pretty sure George can’t make you cu-“

“Fred!“ She gasped before he could even finish his sentence. The taller boy barked out a laugh at her reaction, a grin covering his expression when noticing the flush in her cheeks.

“Come on, mum’s dying to meet you I’m sure.” Fred told her with a smile. He moved his arm from around her shoulders to take her hand instead, lacing his fingers with his as he lead her further into The Burrow.

Y/N would be lying if she said she wasn’t nervous about meeting the rest of Fred’s family. Maybe it was because she knew what her family was like, or simply because she wanted his family to like her. She was guessing that they were extremely lovely after all that Fred had told her, though that still didn’t stop the nervousness swirling in her stomach as she stepped into the kitchen where Fred’s mother was.

“Oh Fred dear, it’s so nice to have you home.” Molly Weasley smiled as she pulled her much taller son into a hug, causing Y/N to let go of his hand so he could move both arms around his mother.

It was strange seeing the bond Fred had with her mother. Whilst Y/N’s mother wasn’t anywhere near as bad as her father, she still didn’t get greeted with hugs and kisses when she came home. She rarely even got a hello. The thought almost made her frown as she watched the interaction, though any negative expression she had was wiped as soon as Mrs. Weasley was looking at her.

“It’s great to meet you, dear, Fred’s told me all about you.” Once again she was surprised as Mrs. Weasley pulled her into a hug too, though she was soon smiling as she hugged the woman back, enjoying the embrace for the moment before she’d pulled away.

“It’s lovely to meet you too, Mrs Weasley.” She smiled, letting Fred pull her into his side as she spoke.

“Oh please do call me Molly, lovely.” The older woman smiled, lightly squeezing her arm before turning to finish up whatever she was cooking.

Christmas with the Weasleys was something so different to what she was used to. Their hospitality towards her was baffling - something she hadn’t expected; especially not from a family who didn’t even know her. But they were all so kind and welcoming - even Percy, who had muttered something about how she was so perfect for Fred as the dinner was being served with a small smile, before continuing his previous conversation with his father about schoolwork. She’d even woken up to a few Christmas presents to her from the Weasleys (aside from what Fred had gotten her, of course) which honestly choked her up a little. Their family cared about her more than her own did.

Though of course, whilst she was thoroughly enjoying herself, she couldn’t help but think about her own family. There was guilt for enjoying herself more with a family who wasn’t hers. Sadness whenever she remembered how miserable her home life was compared to Fred’s. And of course, worry that something would happen like it did at her house. She didn’t expect anything like that from the Weasley family - who were all so nice and kind. But whenever someone shouted too loud, or something dropped and hit the floor with a loud crash, for a moment she expected the fighting to start.

The night after Christmas, Y/N had woken up halfway through the night with a jolt and teary eyes, her breathing laboured after a nightmare. Maybe it was the fact that she’d been thinking about her own family for a while, or simply because she’d just been having a genuinely good day, but of course she had to ruin the night with a bad dream.

Untangling herself from Fred’s spaghetti-like arms she pushed herself to sit up. Her eyes blinked a few times both to rid herself of any unshed tears and to adjust her eyesight in the dark room. Her heart still hammered in her chest over the dream, her body almost feeling constricted in a way. The nightmares were never worse than the real thing, though they were pretty damn close.

Once she was more with it, she could hear her boyfriend snoring beside her, and opposite them both hear George mumbling in his sleep about a fuzzy penguin or something, which made her smile slightly. Originally she had offered to sleep on the sofa downstairs so she wasn’t being a nuisance, but after Fred basically banishing her from ever sleeping there, she caved and let herself sleep in Fred’s bed with him. Not wanting to risk waking either of the twins up she carefully got out of the bed; slipping on a dressing gown and slippers before creeping out of the room to head down to the kitchen.

On her way down to the kitchen she wiped her now red eyes with the soft sleeve of her dressing gown, whilst trying not to trip over her own feet as she made her way downstairs towards the Weasley’s kitchen. Though once she was downstairs Y/N froze on the spot, seeing Mrs. Weasley sat at the kitchen table, looking up at her confusedly once she’d come into the room.

“Y/N? My lovely what’re you doing up so late?” The kind woman asked with a small frown of concern, getting out of her seat to walk over towards her.

“Yeah sorry I’m okay, I just um, I wanted a drink.” Even though she didn’t sound too convincing, Mrs. Weasley just let herself smile a little and nodded, moving over to the sink to pour her a glass of water. Once she had it she turned to hand it to her, not missing the redness in her eyes that could be seen because of the kitchen light.

“Nightmares, dear?” She asked softly as she pushed the glass into her hand, pulling out a seat at the table to her before returning to her own one.

Y/N hesitated, but after seeing that Molly Weasley could just read her like a book anyways she nodded as she took a sip of her water. “Yeah. I didn’t want to wake Fred or George so I came downstairs.” She muttered.

“That’s alright, lovely. Do you want to talk about what it was?” She asked with a kind smile, reaching across the table to lightly squeeze her hand.

Yet again Y/N hesitated. She’d never spoken to anybody about her home life - not even Fred. She knew it was probably worse keeping everything bottled up, though she couldn’t bare to let Fred worry so much about her. Though, Mrs. Weasley was clearly a kind woman, and she knew that if she told her that no hesitation would come her way. So she nodded, taking another sip of her water before speaking.

“Things... aren’t too great at home.” She muttered quietly. “My dad, he gets really stressed at work and when he comes home he drinks, and he’s not a very nice drunk... and my mum, she just doesn’t really care anymore.” She mumbled, lifting her hand to wipe her eyes when they’d glazed over like freshly cut glass with unshed tears. “I’m sorry, I know this probably isn’t what you expected me to talk about.”

“No, that’s alright dear.” Molly shook her head, smiling sadly. “I’m sorry, I never realised. Fred mentioned that you were a little jumpy, but he never said-”

“He doesn’t know.” Y/N immediately cut her off, shaking her own head. “I didn’t want to worry him, and it’s not like he can do anything about it.” She sighed, sipping some more of her water when more tears started to fall.

“You might have to tell him eventually, lovely.” Molly offered her a small smile. “But you’re always welcome here whenever you need a place to stay, alright?”

“Thank you, Mrs. Weasley. I really appreciate that.” She smiled.

“It’s no problem, dear. Now try and get some more sleep, you must be shattered.”

Y/N nodded, finishing her water and thanking Mrs. Weasley once more before she headed back upstairs to Fred and George’s room. She tried to slip back into the bed quietly so she didn’t wake her boyfriend, though once she was laying down Fred squinted one eye open as he snaked his arms around her waist.

“Where’d you go?” He mumbled, still half asleep, pressing his face against her neck as he cuddled into her.

“I needed to pee. Go back to sleep, love.” She whispered back softly as she lifted a hand to start running through Fred’s hair gently, already starting to hear his breathing evening out slightly.

“M’kay.” Fred mumbled, leaving a light kiss against the bare skin of her neck before letting himself drift off to sleep again, it not taking long before Y/N fell asleep too.

Once they’d both woken up, Y/N thought about what Mrs. Weasley had told her all morning. She’d met the older woman’s gaze at the breakfast table, and Molly had just sent her a small knowing smile, before acting like she knew nothing as she turned to speak to her daughter. Y/N appreciated her not saying anything, though as the day went on she realised she probably should tell Fred. Not only should he know as her boyfriend, but she also knew he’d be there for her whenever she needed it. A shoulder to cry on when she was having a bad day, a person to cuddle after she’d had a bad dream. He’d be there for her.

So after dinner once everybody was upstairs getting ready for bed, Y/N sat beside Fred on the sofa in the living room and took his hand, letting the silence brew for a moment before speaking. “Do you ever wonder why I never talk about my family?” She asked softly.

“Not really, I guess they’re just boring old gits.” Fred chuckled at his own joke, though seeing the look on his girlfriend’s face caused him to frown as he lightly squeezed her hand. “Hey, love what’s wrong? Did something happen to your family?”

“I’ve been lying to you.” Her voice was shaky as she spoke, tears quickly gathering along her waterline as she forced herself to focus on their hands instead of looking at Fred’s face. “Things aren’t okay at home, they haven’t been for a while. My dad... he drinks a lot see, and he’s not a nice drunk.”

“Has he ever hurt you?” Fred’s voice was hard as he spoke, his grip on her hand growing a little.

“No.” She shook her head. “No, he just... says things. He thinks I’m weird for being magic, and it all just comes out when he’s drunk.” Y/N sighed, silent tears slipping down her cheeks as she lifted a hand to wipe her eyes. “That’s why I asked to stay here for Christmas.”

“Why did you never tell me?” Fred was frowning in concern when she looked back up at him, his ginger eyebrows furrowed.

“I didn’t want to worry you.” She whispered, shaking her head. “I didn’t need you worrying about something that you couldn’t control.”

“Love,” Fred sighed, letting go of her hand to wrap his arms around her and pull her into him. “I’m always going to worry about you, okay? I want you to tell me when things are wrong so I can be there for you. I’m really sorry about your dad. I’ll always be here for you, you know that right?”

Y/N buried her face in his chest as she wrapped her arms around his waist, nodding as she relaxed into him. It was like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders, now that he knew. It was a relief that he knew - that she didn’t have to hide it from him anymore. And it was even more of a relief knowing he’d be there for her. “I know.”

“Good.” He whispered, pressing a light kiss to the top of her head before tightening his hold on her. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Freddie.” Y/N whispered back, her eyes fluttering closed as she relaxed further into her boyfriend’s comforting hold, soothed by knowing he was going to be there for her, and that she didn’t need to worry anymore.

He knew. And it was okay.

[rainydayhogwartsimagines]

Fred with a Malfoy reader:

Warnings: Angst, kind of sad, nsfw thoughts, set in a non voldemort world

Note: I KEEP THINKING OF FRED. HELP. ME.I’VE FALLEN DOWN A RABBIT HOLE AND I CAN’T GET UP

You were Draco's older sister

And already the family disappointment.

Do you know why?

Because you're the one Malfoy who isn't Slytherin

You're actually a hufflepuff.

Lucius clearly favors Draco and it gets to you sometimes.

You're very protective over your brother.

You constantly butt heads with Potter

Draco absolutely loathed it when you'd go all big sister on him in public.

There was one day where you had to separate Harry from a fight with Draco and who pulled Harry back but Fred.

Fred walked up to you afterwards saying "Hey. Sorry about Harry."

You chuckled and nodded. "Sorry about my brother. He tends to get on people's nerves."

Fred smiled "Mind if I sit here?" He asked.

You nodded and he sat next to you.

"So you're Draco's sister... And you're a hufflepuff?" He asked.

You sucked in a breath at that sentence, gripping your glass.

Fred noticed that look.

Pure resentment to that phrase.

"Do you enjoy hogwarts?" Fred asked, cutting your attention away.

"... It's my home." You muttered.

"it's that for a lot of people." Fred nodded.

You took a long sip of your drink.

"Why the sudden curiosity?" You asked.

"Well... I actually didn't know Draco had a sister until four hours ago." Fred admitted.

"Really? You didn't realize the Malfoy's had a massive disappointment?" You asked sarcastically.

"Why would they be disappointed?" Fred asked.

You gave him a "really?" Look before motioning to the table he was sitting at and then your robes.

"... They're upset over a factor you had no control over?" Fred asked.

"Pretty much." You said.

"That's rubbish." He scoffed.

"Try telling that to von douchebag-- I mean father." You said making Fred smile.

Fred finding his way to you was quickly becoming a regular thing

He'd usually sit with you at dinner getting to know the little of pieces of you that many people didn't even bother to see

Draco frowned noticing you and Fred

He pulled you aside.

"Y/n, what the hell are you doing!?" Draco asked.

"What do you mean?" You asked.

"Father's already pissed about the house but friends with a Weasley!? Are you out of your mind!?" Draco asked.

"....I don't care." You said.

Yeah so your third year was the year you basically gave up trying to please your father

Draco was honestly anxious about it.

You were his sister. He might not say it but he loves you.

He definitely noticed the nights that you and Lucius would argue and you'd have meltdowns in the hallway.

The thing was: if Draco cried, you, Lucius or Narcissa would come running.

You had only Draco who'd be concerned.

So when you gave up trying to be the perfect daughter Draco feared that Lucius would be pissed.

Which he was when he caught wind of who you spent your time with.

He found out from Arthur that Fred had been spending a lot of time with one of his children.

And Lucius immediately knew who it was.

He came to you pissed.

"What in the hell are you thinking spending time with a Weasley!?"

You did something you never did before.

You actually rolled your eyes.

"You're acting like a child father." You said sharply.

"Excuse me!?" Lucius asked.

"You feud with them, yet you don't actually know them. Just because they have low status doesn't mean they're not worth your time." You snapped.

He threatened to send you to Durmstrang and you actually said "Oh I wish you would because at least I wouldn't be here!"

You went back to school and Draco was keeping very close to you.

He honestly wanted to spend enough time with you if you were really going to go to a different school.

Fred noticed you doing slightly self destructive things and asked Draco what exactly was going on.

Draco told him everything figuring Fred could talk some sense into you.

And Fred did.

He found you sitting in the astronomy tower one day.

"Hey." You said.

He sat across from you

"Hey." Fred said.

"What brings you to me?" You asked making him chuckle.

"I wanted to talk to you." Fred said.

He asked you what was going on.

You danced around the subject but ultimately failed.

"Y/n I know Lucius is mad." Fred said.

You dropped any fragments of a smile and looked away.

You two just sat in silence for a while

"Do you know what it's like to feel so alone even though you're surrounded by people?" You finally asked looking at Fred with this expression that honestly almost broke the boy.

"I feel that every time I have to go home. My own father is ashamed of me because I couldn't keep up with his standards, my mother doesn't even try to know me. My little brother is the one having to check on me when one of my parents gets angry." You said.

"I'm alone and that's terrifying." You whispered with tears falling down your face.

Fred said nothing, hugging you to his chest.

You just held onto him and that was when Fred gained this protective nature over you. 

You stopped the self destructive habits and relaxed a bit on the “Let’s piss off Dad” bit.

Draco eased up a lot on you hanging out with Fred and George now, seeing as Fred obviously provided comfort to you. 

George began to really love having you around, considering you called yourself “THE BRINGER OF CHAOS” But was too terrified to order anything in Hogsmeade because you were socially awkward

“Ah yes, the bringer of chaos seems to have had trouble yet again with her drink order.” George teased.

“Okay, first off: Fuck you. Second off: Ordering is hard okay!?” You said, earning snorts from Fred and George

Fred invited you to come over for the summer

You were determined to go but Lucius basically told you “If you go, the door here is never open to you again.” 

Draco gave you a look that just said “Y/n. Do it.” 

And you did. No hesitation as Lucius basically disowned you. 

So you left, family ring resting on the dining table along with a letter to Draco.

When you showed up to the Burrow the weight of what happened hit you as you walked in.

Fred saw you and hugged you and for some reason that made you breakdown sobbing.

The whole family was naturally concerned.

I mean, you did just show up and start crying.

Fred didn’t even ask what was wrong, he just held you. 

Then he noticed the absence of your family ring. 

“Y/n... Where’s your ring?” He asked. 

“I-I... I-I’ve been disowned.” You finally admitted making Molly exchange a look with Arthur that screamed “This is our kid now”

Fred was PISSED though at Lucius

When you went to bed Fred and George sat at a table with their parents and talked.

“I’m going to kill that man if I ever see him!” Fred snapped. 

“Freddie!” Molly scolded. 

“Oh come on mum, you have to admit, even for this man this is low.” George agreed. 

“I have to side with the boys on this one, there is no excuse to give up on a child.” Arthur nodded. 

“I cannot believe he did this! How can you not love Y/n!? She’s literally one of the sweetest people on the face of the planet.” Fred griped making Molly, Arthur and George all look at Fred

Did he just... Imply that he loved you?

“What?” Fred asked, noticing the looks. 

“Nothing! just... We’ve never seen you so focused on someone.” Arthur said. 

“Just makes me wonder if you like Y/n.” George muttered. 

“Wha-- no!” Fred denied

But that one little comment kept that boy up for days

He didn’t like you. Right?

Although... He did notice the cute little habit of biting your lip when you read

Or the fact that you always tucked your hair behind your ear when you felt someone watching you

Or that beautiful laugh that would make Fred smile every time he heard it

Or the smile that could light up a room

Fuck. Maybe he did like you.

George noticed the sleeplessness that started with Fred

He even commented on it at one point but Fred ignored it.

One night confirmed Fred’s thought on liking you. 

He again, could not sleep. So he sat outside.

You came outside with two mugs filled with hot cocoa.

“Saw you out here and figured you could use this.” You said sitting next to him. 

You looked at the stars with Fred and that was the moment that boy fell and he fell HARD.

The way your eyes just reflected the stars, the way your lips parted 

the way the braid in your hair, pulled it back so your face was visible

The look in your eyes when you looked at Fred

Oh that boy was HOOKED man.

When you went back to Hogwarts you ran into Lucius at the station.

The Weasley children all looked ready to straight up kill Lucius when he looked over at you. 

You expected Draco to ignore you but the second he saw you he hugged you. 

He was taller now. 

God you missed your little brother

The good thing about Hogwarts was: Lucius was no where near you, so you could spend as much time with your little brother as you wanted. 

Draco sat with you guys on the train, telling you basically what happened after you left

You were surprised to hear that Lucius actually couldn’t even look in the direction of your room

You were even more surprised to hear that Narcissa refused to let any house elves remove anything from it either. 

There was a part of you that wanted to return. But then you remembered that empty feeling of when you were there and you pushed it down. 

Draco was now more involved with the Weasleys 

They didn’t mind. 

At least someone in your family was actively showing that they cared about you. 

There were a lot more... Moments popping up with you and Fred though that were making everyone watch you two 

Specifically one where Fred grabbed a book you couldn’t reach and when you turned around you two were close

When I say close I mean you could feel his breath on your cheek close. 

You also had this cute little thing where Fred would steal your books and you’d have to jump on his back for them 

You could crawl up that boy like a God damn spider monkey 

A part of you wanted to climb him in a different way

He’d always make you smile, without fail. 

Sometimes you’d have these little moments where it was honest to God a wonder you two weren’t dating

Like the time that Fred almost had you pinned against a wall, faces centimeters apart as he handed you back your books after taking them

Or the winks he’d give you

Or the fact that he sometimes would just pick you up from behind and make you giggle.

Even Draco was waiting for one of you to FUCKING SAY SOMETHING

That day finally came when George had this funny little game to play

Ever heard of the game “Red light”?

Here’s the rules: You have to basically play the game to make a person feel uncomfortable enough that they say “RED LIGHT” 

Here’s the thing: You’re a spiteful bitch and so is Fred

Everyone else playing would crack.

So when it was just down to you two Fred had to make you uncomfortable

He leaned in, very close to you and kept a hand rested on your knee

Your face had this smirk on it as Fred inched closer to you

That’s when you pulled an uno reverse card on the bastard and kissed his nose, making his eyes go wide. 

Two could play at that game though.

Fred kissed your cheek

You kissed his cheek.

He kissed your nose, something inside you snapped and you yanked that fucker forward by his tie and kissed him. 

Everyone in the room was losing their shit as Fred parted with you.

The look you two gave each other when he parted was “Wait did that actually just happen?”

But to your surprise Fred actually kissed you again making everyone go ballistic 

When the game ended you had no idea if the events that took place were because of Fred actually wanting to kiss you or if it was just to win

Fred was going through the same thing

Finally you two talked after Fred ran into you in the library

You two talked while you were grabbing a few books for class. 

“About the kiss...” Fred finally said.

“What about it?” You asked, trying to hide the nervousness in your voice 

“I... I really meant it when I kissed you Y/n. I like you.” He finally said.

You turned around with wide eyes. 

“You do?” You asked

“How could I not-- Y/n you’re amazing. Truly captivating.” He told you. 

You turned back around to hide the blush on your face.

“I like you too Fred.” You said, a grin appearing on the boy’s face. 

You reached for a book and he picked it up for you, handing it to you.

You slowly turned around, again the boy’s face centimeters away from yours as you looked in his eyes. 

“Oh fuck it.” He muttered, dropping the book and kissing you. 

You ran your fingers through his hair and he swore if you two weren’t at risk of getting caught, chances are you two would’ve done A LOT more than just making out. 

You two dated though, Fred now never being seen without you. 

The group was relieved when you finally did start dating, honestly they were surprised that didn’t happen until AFTER the game

You absolutely loved Fred though, no question about it. 

Draco was glad to finally see you truly happy.

Was he happy you were dating a Weasley? Hell no. but if you were happy, nothing was going to be said about it. 

Summers were honestly a fun time. 

in... multiple ways... *cough* you two totally slept together *cough*

FAMILY FUN! WOOH!

But there was this one specific moment that Fred knew he was going to marry you one day

You were watching the sunset, wearing this yellow sundress

Ginny braided your hair that morning and it rested on your shoulder as you stared at the scenery

Fred was helping his mother with the laundry and he noticed you, smiling

You felt someone watching you so you turned around, a breeze kicking up as you turned

The sun on your face with stray strands of hair and that beautiful smile made Fred melt. 

He just knew “This is my future wife, I dare you to change my fucking mind.”

So graduation was approaching and Fred had already made up his mind, he was marrying you. 

But he wanted to play this right.

So he went to the crowned king of douchebag himself- Lucius Malfoy

He was so official, going as far to set up an appointment with this fucker. 

Lucius, Narcissa, Draco and him sat in his study in complete silence for a LONG time, mostly Fred resisting the urge to absolutely pop off at him

“Why are you here Weasley?” Lucius finally asked

Fred took in a breath. “I want to marry your daughter.” He said.

Draco looked at Fred surprised. 

“What?” Lucius asked. 

“I want to Marry Y/n. I know you hate me, I honestly couldn’t care less about that. But I hope you’ll set aside those emotions because I love your daughter.” Fred finally said. 

Draco looked at Fred and then Lucius. 

“Lucius.” Narcissa said. 

He seemed to be pondering before letting out a LONG sigh

“you have my blessing.” He finally said

“I’m willing to fight you on-- wait really?” Fred gaped

“Yes. While I’m not exactly happy about this, you’ve provided Y/n with a haven. You’ve made her happy. I can’t make up for the time I spent fighting with her but I can try to fix the bond now. Starting with this.” Lucius said making Draco gape. 

“Thank you.” Fred said relieved. 

“When are you proposing?” 

Shit. He hadn’t thought that out yet. 

“... I’m not sure.” Fred admitted. 

“Next week!” Draco said. 

Everyone turned to him

“You graduate next week, I have an idea for you.” Draco said

This kid’s idea was fucking smart too. 

Take you stargazing. Spend quality time with her. And then when it feels right, propose. 

And Fred took that advice to heart

After graduation you went back to the Burrow to find your father, mother and brother waiting

“Father?” You gaped. 

You two had a long overdue conversation. It was emotional and hard. But the words “I’m proud to see the woman you’ve become” Made you nearly break down

Was your relationship with Lucius fixed? Fuck no. You still had this piece of you that wasn’t ready to trust him

But at least now he was trying.

You all celebrated together

You found it strange that Draco and George seemed to know something you didn’t

You shrugged it off though and just spent the time laughing and smiling

When everyone tired themselves out Fred and you went outside looking at the stars

You had his arms wrapped around you staring at the stars with this peaceful smile. 

He let go of you at one point and you rose a brow turning around to see him on one knee

“Oh my god” You gaped

:”Y/n--” “Yes” “Would you do--” “Yes” “The honor of being my wi--” “Yes- sorry” “The honor of being my wife--” “YES”

you tackled him into a hug, kissing his face with a smile 

Everyone heard you make a loud noise outside, Draco and George both smiling because they knew exactly what just happened.

Charlie, Bill and Percy popped in confusing the fuck out of the rest of the family, what the hell was going on?

You finally walked back in and had this MASSIVE smile on your face. 

“I proposed.” Fred said making everyone else stand up.

“I said yes!” You squealed making everyone practically scream. 

lots of crying from Molly 

And Ron

You two got married soon after and the store was finally opened

You, Fred and George ran it together

The shop was always filled with smiles and laughter

Lucius and Narcissa would come over for the holidays

You swore once you saw your father smile.

He denies it even to this day

Draco always writes to his big sister.

ALWAYS MAN

He usually pops in too to say hi. 

George takes complete credit for getting you two together

Which... He’s not wrong but damn does he lord it over you two

So when your first son’s middle name was George he might’ve cried

a lot

You absolutely adored the life you made for yourself here

You loved to just stand in the doorway of your home sometimes and just watch Fred with Orion.

Because they were your entire world.

[bluebellwriting]

Love Me Tender Part 3

(Note: I know Molly hasn’t been confirmed as a demon nor is she in Hell, but for the sake of the story, I’m saying that she is a demon and she is in Hell. There’s not a lot of information on the spider fam so I’m going to be taking some liberties here)

Sunday dinners at your dad’s home have always a tradition, even when you all were alive. It wasn’t religious, Lord knows if it had been you probably wouldn’t have ended up here. But when your family spends every day of their lives and afterlives meeting with mob bosses, disposing of bodies, and doing drugs, it was nice to have a reason to come together and remind each other that you were all still here. It was because of those dinners and the evenings spent cooking with your Nonna that your love of cooking came to fruition.

Oh, your Nonna. You’ve tried looking for her down here, even though you know that there was no way she was deserving of a place like this. She was a saint, the mother you deserved instead of the mother you actually had. Your mother was cold, lazy, vain, couldn’t care for her children to save her life, judgmental -- she always insisted you try whatever insane weight loss trend was popular. Nonna was kind, understanding, taught you to be tough but also how to take care of those you loved, and never tried to pit you and your sister against each other. She’s honestly the only reason yours and Molly’s relationship survived.

But when she died, you took over as the family’s cook as the only person who could actually make something without burning it. Until you yourself died at the ripe age of 23, long before the rest of your family. Your family doesn’t talk about it much, but you can just imagine what the first dinner without you was like. How sad and empty, how burnt the food must have been if there even was any.

But you’re together again and your dinners were able to survive your family’s plunge into the afterlife. Apparently, so did your family home.

As soon as you entered the threshold of the home, you and Angel were smushed into a hug by Molly.

“My darlings!” She cries. Angel and you snuggle into the warm arms of your sister and wrap your arms around her.

“How are ya, Mol?” Angel asks.

“Oh, ya know, same old, same old.”

“Are those creeps giving you trouble at the store?” You take a step back and eye your sister up and down, looking for any physical manifestation that those creepy men crushing on your sister are up to no good.

“Not since you had a little chat with them, (N/N),” she teases.

Molly’s eyes brighten at the sight of your outfit.

“Ooh! You’re wearing the new skirt and blouse! It’s so pretty on you, (Y/N)! And I know I always say this but you have a great rack girl, ya gotta show it off like this more.”

You blush brightly and cross your arms over your torso.

“Gee thanks, Molly,” you mumble.

“I don’t know how you haven’t found a man yet with that bod!” She squeals and pinches your cheeks.

“Well, since ya mentioned it...” Angel smirks.

“Nope!” You shout and storm further into the house to avoid your baby siblings.

Molly looks back at Angel with an arched brow, the question looming in the air.

You make it to the kitchen, where your father and brother are heating up the food you left here last week. You turn your nose up.

“You know, I could have made something fresh. This is all a week old! And here I thought you were going to cook for once.”

“Very funny, (Y/N),” Niss grumbles, stirring the pasta sauce you had brought over last time.

“How are ya, sweetheart?” Henroin gives you a warm hug, one that is snug and warm and reserved for his unofficially favorite child.

“I’m good, dad. Doing just fine.”

“They’re running you ragged at that hotel.”

“Which means I’m left to pick up the slack,” Niss growls. You pull away from the hug and pull your brother into a forceful hug, just to make him uncomfortable. You were the same height as Niss and a year younger, and as grumpy and infuriating he can be, you always felt the closest to him. You’d like to think he felt the same, considering he scolds you the least. Or maybe that’s just because you’re way stronger than him and you have wrestled him to the ground.

“I know, but I’m doing this for Angel--”

“Anthony,” Niss hisses.

“If he tells me he wants to go by Angel, then I’m calling him Angel.” You narrow your eyes, your irises flashing a dangerous red and your teeth grow into vicious fangs in an instant. Niss rolls his eyes but backs down, trying to hide the shiver that went up his spine.

“I still don’t see how they’re supposed to help him.”

“Neither do I but I genuinely believe that that hotel is his only chance.”

“But why do you have to be there, too?” Your father asks.

“Because I’m the only one who knows how to handle him,” you beam.

“And because she’s dating the Radio Demon,” Molly squeals as she bursts in the kitchen, followed closely by a smirking Angel.

��What?!” Your brother and dad yell.

“I am not dating the Radio Demon, right, Angel?” You stalk over to him and stomp on his foot.

“Ah! Fine, fine. But she’s got him wrapped around her little finger, don’t ya, sis?”

“What the hell does that mean, (Y/N)?” Niss growls. Your father just stares at you, his eyes empty of all emotion but his shoulders are tensed.

“It means nothing. We work together and. That’s. It.” Everyone in the kitchen is staring at you. Angel is smirking, Molly is biting her lip as she holds in a squeal, Niss looks as though he’s about to punch a wall, and your dad is still staring at you. Their eyes are like deadly sunbeams and your body is a wilting flower. You wrap your arms around yourself, wishing the ground would just swallow you up and transport you to Second Hell, or whatever lies beyond this reality. A part of you finds yourself longing for arms to hold you, to wrap around you and shield you. Longing for grey arms in a red suit to protect you.

Oh jeez, maybe you do love him.

“The sauce is burning,” you break the silence and move towards the stove. “Is the pasta ready?”

“Yeah,” Henroin says and brings a bowl of noodles to the already set table. You turn the stove off and slip on two oven mitts to bring over the pot of sauce.

“Sit down,” you command. Your siblings scurry to their seats as your dad and you arrange everything on the table.

Once you’ve all sat and filled your plates (and taken away Angel’s phone), you turn to your dad.

“So what was the big announcement?” You ask.

Henroin swallows, “Not so much of an announcement, more of a request of you and Anth-- Angel. I know this hotel has been good for you,” he says to your brother. “And it sounds like it’s been... good for you too, (Y/N). But I need you to start pulling your weight around here, especially you, (Y/N).”

“Why me?” (Y/N) you ask, sending your father an incredulous look. “I thought I told you I wanted out of all of that nasty business.”

“Because some of our partners respond better to you. You have a way with people, in the way that is below my stature and beyond anything your brother can do.”

“Dad!” Niss yells, offended.

“Shut up. Now listen, (Y/N), you can still stay at the hotel, do whatever the hell it is you do there,” he gives you a pointed look, hinting that he hasn’t forgotten the Radio Demon business.

“But when I need you to attend a meeting or negotiation,” he continues. “I expect you to be there. You owe your family that.”

You look down at your barely-picked-at-plate, having suddenly lost your appetite.

“I’m guessing you have a meeting soon that you think I’d be well-suited for,” you mumble.

“There’s an Overlord we need to do some business with and I finally convinced her to have an audience. But word on the street is that she responds better to friends or women. And since we’re not friends and I’m definitely not sending Molly--”

“Daddy, you wound me!”

“--That leaves you, kid. We’re counting on you.”

You nod your head. The conversation continues, your siblings argue, Henroin gives you details for the meeting but you let it all wash over you like a wave. You actually thought you could finally start living for yourself for once, that you could stop taking care of others. You were wrong.

---

The city is alive with the sound of laughing and screaming, but all you can think about is the meeting tomorrow with Rosie, an Overlord and the owner of Rosie’s Emporium. Your eyes are heavy from the chaotic dinner, the three times you had to keep Niss from launching himself across the table at Angel, Molly talking your ear off about some cute man who would be perfect for you, and the new weight that has been added to your shoulders. It takes everything in you not to crash the car on your way home.

When you arrive back at the hotel it’s late at night and somehow Angel has boundless energy. He prances to the door, calling out about some party he’s been invited to by Cherri.

“Angel, it’s a Sunday night,” You scold.

“And? My work doesn’t exactly require me to be up and at em at 8, doll.” He bursts through the doors and immediately goes over to Husk and the bar, probably to pregame. You shuffle your way inside after him, rubbing your temples in an effort to tame the ache developing in your head.

“Oh, darling,” Alastor sings. He dances into the lobby from the kitchen, smile as wide as ever, holding two steaming mugs. Except instead of one of his pristine suits, he is dressed in slacks, suspenders, a shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and a red apron. He looks completely and utterly adorable, and you’re just loving the view of his lithe forearms.

As soon as he heard Angel’s voice bothering Husk, Alastor came running to the lobby with the hot chocolate he had spent hours perfecting. His first batch was too bitter, the second far too sweet for anyone’s liking, and the third was accidentally consumed by Charlie (who is now hiding somewhere in the hotel to avoid his wrath). Plus, he had to endure Charlie’s relentless teasing. But he was certain this would be the perfect cup of liquid goodness to impress his sweetest darling. And judging by your tense shoulders and the stress in the lines of your face, you would definitely be needing something to lift your spirits.

“Goodness, did the dinner not go well?”

You released a deep, exhausted sigh, and lifted your head slowly to meet his eyes. For a moment, Alastor wonders if this might have been the wrong move. You were clearly worn out. You probably just wanted to shut yourself in your room and go to bed and not have anything to do with him and his boyish attempts to woo you. Hot chocolate, really? What was he thinking? Someone like you deserved something lavish, and you would probably scoff at something so simple as a hot drink.

His shoulders deflate at your lack of smile.

“It went about the same as it always did,” you sigh. “Siblings fighting, me saving dinner, my sister trying to set me up with some man.”

Alastor has to restrain the growl bubbling up in his chest.

Your eyes fall to the two mugs in his hands. You sniff the air and smile at the rich scent.

“Is that hot chocolate?”

“Oh... yes, it is.”

“Mm, is there any left?”

“Well of course! I made this cup especially for you, dearest!” He practically shoves the mug into your hands.

You quickly lift the mug to your lips and hope to all that is good and holy that he chalks your blushing cheeks to the heat of the drink.

“Oh, Alastor, this is wonderful. Thank you. I really needed this after the night I had.” You smile up at him, the lines in your face easing immediately. It’s enough to make the Radio Demon’s knees quake.

“You are absolutely welcome...” He pauses. The original plan was to woo you with the drink, whisk you off to a remote corner of the hotel, and attempt to confess his undying love to you. But the yawn you try to stifle almost causes him to deflate. Almost.

“Would like to talk about it, love? I’m all ears! U-Unless you’re too tired. You absolutely do not have to--”

Love. Love. You grip the mug tighter.

“Actually, Alastor, that would be lovely. If you don’t mind.”

Alastor grins.

“Not at all.”

He places a hand on the small of your back and transports you both to the library. He snaps his fingers and a fire lights up the room for you both. You flop onto the couch and Alastor takes a seat beside you, making a point to sidle up to you as you proceed to detail everything about your day.

At first you were rather restrained, convinced that the last thing this important, powerful, strong, kind, considerate, lovely man wanted was to listen to your problems. But as he asked more and more questions, he opened you up like an oyster, waiting patiently for the pearl inside.

“So now I’m meeting with this Rosie tomorrow. Something about transporting her goods across territories.”

“Rosie, you say?”

“Yes. Oh, do you know her?”

“Why yes! She’s an old and dear friend. But, um, quite ruthless towards strangers. You said you’re going alone?”

“Right.”

“Is that... normal? I mean, for you to go alone to meet such dangerous individuals.”

“Oh, yes. I’ve been doing so since I was 18 and alive.”

Alastor chokes on his drink.

“That young?”

“I grew up in the mafia, Al.” You send him a coy smile. “I’m not as defenseless as I look.”

“Oh, I never doubted that, dearest, but... to not have anyone there for support...”

“When you grow up the way I did, you learn not to trust anyone. Not fully at least, and definitely not until you know them well enough.”

“Is that right... Do... Do you trust me, then? Or have I not earned that honor?” Alastor smiles at you but within he is a mess. This is it. The moment you tell him that he’s far too dangerous, too vicious, too disgusting for you to ever let into your life in the way he craves.

“You’re on your way.” You smirk at him and the light floods back into his body. That’s a start.

“So, would you allow me to accompany you tomorrow then?”

“Oh, no, Alastor I could never impose on you like that--” He’s just being polite, you tell yourself. He doesn’t actually want to spend time with you outside of the hotel, isn’t actually concerned with whether you die at the hands of this Rosie.

“Nonsense, my darling.” He leans down, smelling the chocolate on your breath. His nose is so close to yours, your lips just as near to his. He could lean forward just a bit, feign a fall, just for one chance to kiss you like he’s dreamed.

“I would love nothing more than to be your knight in shining armor.”

You smile, “Just to be clear, if you are going to escort me, Alastor. I am no damsel in distress.” You boop his nose and giggle at the hot blush on his cheeks.

“But,” you continue, “I would love nothing more than to have your company tomorrow.”

“Well, then have it you shall, love.”

[halothenthehorns]

THE INVITATION

Sirius sighed with complete distaste as he began. They were already off to a terrible start with all this Voldemort and the traitor talk, now he got the misfortune of getting the chapter that would most likely turn him into a murderous fool all over again at what these Dursley's had been up to involving his pup.

Harry went into the kitchen to find the Dursley's already present, Petunia cutting something up while Dudley sat in a chair pouting, his sulking face somehow taking up more space than usual.

"A feat I hadn't thought possible," James snorted.

This was saying something, as he always took up an entire side of the square table by himself. When his mother put a quarter of unsweetened grapefruit

Remus may have felt pity for anyone else, having to eat unsweetened anything, but found that this was probably the best form of torture that could be inflicted on these Dursley's, and it was self-inflicted, so he had no qualms.

in front of him with a wavering smile, Dudley's glare only intensified upon her. His life, for the first time ever, was not going his way. He'd come home with his end of year school report, and as always Petunia and Vernon found ways to get around most of the comments, such as his failing grades,

Lily made a scathing noise, vividly remembering how both her's and Petunia's marks had been carefully monitored and if not up to their parents standards they'd at least have a talking to, but compared to what all she'd heard she wouldn't be surprised if Dudley flunked every class and Petunia didn't bat an eye.

  which was brushed aside by Petunia saying his teachers just didn't understand him.

"Yes, every single teacher at that school misunderstands him; not one of them could grasp, at this elite school they've sent Dudley to, how to teach him," James snorted.

"I don't think Merlin could have taught this fool how to count," Sirius smirked.

Then there were the reports of bullying, which Petunia claimed were all false as she knew her baby couldn't hurt a fly.

Harry in particular gave an eye roll at that exaggeration, as he had the childhood marks to prove otherwise.

What neither of them could explain away though, was the final comment. Even though Petunia claimed Dudley was just big-boned,

"No, Hagrid has big bones," Remus enunciated as if the idiots were present. "That child has more fat than bone."

and that he was a growing boy who needed plenty of food,

"I, really am stumped at just how blind, or stupid she is," Sirius shook his head at how pathetic this kept getting.

the school simply just didn't make pants in Dudley's size anymore, as he was approximately the same weight as a baby orca.

"I really cannot picture that, that's just terrible." Lily's frown kept deepening. Even if she didn't like Dudley, it was because of his parents he was this way. It was made all the worse that it mainly seemed to be Petunia's fault he got like this, though Vernon certainly wasn't stepping in to stop anything.

No matter the fuss Dudley kicked up in protest, which involved the walls of Harry's bedroom shaking from all of the shouting,

"Considering how he reacted when Harry got his second bedroom, I think we should be grateful shouting seems to have been it," James huffed.

"At least there wasn't a turtle thrown this time, I seem to recall that," Sirius nodded in agreement.

"I'm also fairly certain it was mentioned he kicked one of his parents, so I'm with you on this," Lily grumbled.

the diet had begun. The school had sent home a sheet for Dudley to follow, filled with a proper nutrition diet. Petunia had decided that if Dudley was to follow this, the whole family was to as well.

"Wait, what?" Lily yelped, turning concerned eyes on her already malnourished son while he was at that house. "They were on the verge of starving you before, now you're only getting how much?"

Harry though had a new kind of smirk on his face, not one the others saw too often, which only made the boys more excited and happy as he said, "Don't worry, I don't follow it."

Lily did not look encouraged, but James was definitely more eager now to find out how Harry got around this.

At that time she passed a grapefruit quarter to Harry. He noticed that it was a lot smaller than Dudley's.

"Are you kidding me?" Sirius frowned. "You had to be the skinniest one at that table, but you still somehow got less food than Dudley?"

Harry gave an absent shrug, well aware of Petunia's view that if Harry suffered just that little more than Dudley it was somehow okay.

Petunia seemed to feel that the best way to keep up Dudley's morale was to make sure that he did, at least, get more to eat than Harry.

"No! No that is not how that works, you foul horrible excuse for a person!" Lily seethed. "One boy should not have to suffer to make the other feel better! Merlin Petunia, is that why you went out of your way to try and ruin my life growing up?" Lily went on a tangent for a few more minutes before she finally ran out of steam. There was a lot more colorful and violent things tossed in there, which left the boys shrinking back in genuine fright, even if they did agree. She'd clearly been wanting to say all of that for quite some time, and just seemed to have finally found her perfect opportunity. It was quite the opposite reaction she'd had from back in the first book when Petunia had called her sister a freak when Hagrid had arrived, all of this had probably been building since then. She finally came to a stop taking deep and slow breaths, then looked around half ashamed as she muttered, "Sorry, didn't mean to take that out on you lot."

James relaxed when he realized the worst was over and placed a gentle arm around her, saying, "Nah, best to get it all out. Want to start in on anyone else?"

"It might just be you if you don't keep reading," Lily returned, trying for a normal smile.

James wasn't actually sure if she was kidding or not, so he decided it was best not to test her.

What Petunia, or any of the Dursley's, didn't know though, was that Harry wasn't following this diet at all. The moment he'd caught wind of living off of lettuce all summer, he'd sent pleading notes to his friends.

"Really, really would have liked to read those," Remus frowned, wondering how on earth Harry could've phrased this so it wouldn't be so alarming that at least the Weasley's would have said something to Dumbledore. Harry was asking his friends to send him food, how on earth could that be considered normal? Shouldn't someone have come and checked on him because of that?

The others were thinking the exact same thing, but as always when they looked expectantly at Harry like they wanted him to elaborate, he ignored everyone's eye and instead looked pleadingly to the book like he was hoping it would read itself to get him out of this. Sirius was feeling pretty confident by now that if he confronted Harry he could probably whittle enough he might really tell him now. James, on the other hand, clearly wasn't as he recognized his son still didn't want to talk about this and not wanting to force it out of him kept going.

Each had complied, first Hermione by sending Harry some sugar free snacks, courtesy of her dentist parents.

"I don't think Harry phrased it the way we were thinking if all he's going to get in return is snacks," Lily sighed, starting to feel a little fidgety again. She really didn't want to spend any time on the thought that her son was only living on tiny snacks and carrot sticks, definitely not the proper nutrition a growing boy needed.

Then Hagrid had sent over some rock cakes for him.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure Harry's still in the starving category with that," Sirius muttered.

Which Harry hadn't been able to eat or do anything with, as he was well aware of Hagrid's poor culinary skill,

'Honestly making me wonder why you wrote to tell Hagrid at all,' Remus couldn't help but think, but held that one in.

Ron's mother though, sent Harry a cart load of food with their aging owl, including several meat pies and fruitcakes.

James couldn't help a little snort of surprise. He could just imagine Ron receiving his letter from Harry asking if he could be sent a snack or something, and this was Molly's response? What would she do if she knew the full extent of Harry's stay there? He was actually hoping to hear about this now.

Then when Harry's birthday had arrived, which the Dursley's had ignored as usual,

Was it more sad that they weren't surprised anymore, or that it still bothered them just as much as the first time to hear that? Just the fact that they continually, no matter what, kept doing their very best to leave Harry at his worst left them with the desire to strangle the lot of them every time!

he'd received a cake from each friend, plus Sirius.

James lost it. He was reduced into almost hysterical laughter as he tried to imagine Sirius filching a cake from a bakery to send to Harry, or even better, trying to break into someone's house just to pull this off. Of all the things for him to be doing while on the run! Sirius wasn't a particularly good cook, he'd never had to learn, so the idea was made all the more laughable if the second were true and Sirius went through a few trials before he'd mailed a cake off to Harry with one of those tropical birds!

"Oh come on," Lily wheezed not looking much better herself. "I think it's sweet."

"Thank you Lily," Sirius said with a snooty voice. He was proud of himself for considering something like this, he more than owed it to Harry.

Remus was the only one who couldn't bring himself to even muster up a smile, hunkering down in his seat and deciding this was the final straw, he officially had completely forgotten about Harry.

He must have decided when he left Hogwarts he was just leaving everything. Maybe he was just busy, searching down that traitor and not even realizing the passing time, but it still didn't sit right with him he'd completely phased back out of Harry's life without any mention. He didn't think the others noticed, he certainly hoped they wouldn't as he had no way to explain himself.

Harry still had two of them left,

"I still can't say I'm happy with this," Lily really did settle back down with a crinkled nose. "They'd surely go stale, and you don't need to be living off of just cake any more than carrot sticks."

"Better than no food at all," Sirius grumbled, which Lily acknowledged.

and so looking forward to a much better breakfast, Harry picked up his spoon to begin eating while Petunia passed Vernon his own slice. When he saw this he muttered if this was it, and Petunia merely shot a look at a sulking Dudley who had already wolfed down his own. Before Vernon could start in on his, there was a knock at the door, and Vernon got up to answer it. The moment he was out of sight and his mother wasn't watching, Dudley had snatched the fruit away and downed it as well.

"He's probably going to get in trouble for that, and I still don't care." James rolled his eyes.

Harry could hear muffled voices talking, then the sound of ripping paper. Before anyone could wonder on it, Vernon reappeared, his gaze landing on Harry, the expression already unpleasant as he snarled at him to get into the living room.

All five of them either groaned or sighed, either for the 'you' comment or because Harry had just woken up, what could he be blamed for already?

Harry followed him in and sat down on the couch as Vernon marched in front of him, having the pose of a man about to announce his being arrested,

"He wishes." Harry muttered.

and began by saying 'so.'

"So what?" Sirius snapped.

Harry's first instinct was to reply, 'so what'

"And you actually restrained yourself?" James cocked a brow in surprise. "I am impressed."

but decided not to press Vernon's temper.

Lily's eyes narrowed with furious curiosity, pondering at the phrasing of that as she didn't like to think of that man's temper at all.

So he instead waited silently as Vernon continued by telling Harry Vernon had received a letter, concerning Harry.

"Who'd be writing to you through Muggle mail?" Remus asked, distracted from his own self-pity for now to think on this.

"Search me," Harry shrugged, now mimicking the expression of puzzled.

Harry was confused at once, as he had no idea who it could be from. Vernon flipped open the letter and began reading, saying it was from Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, and how they must have heard about them already through Harry.

"Ah, so it's from one of Ron's parents," Lily stated, though this still managed to increase their confusion. Why would they be writing to the Dursley's like this? A few interesting things came to mind, but it didn't seem the Weasley's type.

"And a big no to that by the way," Sirius muttered in reference to the actual letter, as he was well aware Harry wouldn't go talking to the Dursley's about needing new socks, let alone chatting about his friends.

The letter then went on to say that Arthur Weasley had procured tickets for the upcoming Quidditch World Cup,

James couldn't help a little squeal as he read that. Prime tickets! His son was going to see the World Cup in person! While he would never not be agitated at the very existence of the Dursley's, at least this was something good he could latch onto.

and she was writing to them hoping that Harry could come stay with them for the rest of the summer while he attended. She asked that Harry would respond with an answer in the normal way, as she wasn't sure the postman knew where they lived.

"I'm going with probably not," Remus smiled warmly, thinking that most muggle posts wouldn't be able to find a wizard village.

She added on at the end by signing her name as Molly Weasley, and adding a postscript that she hoped there were enough stamps on the letter.

"What does she mean enough?" Lily asked, already a smile creeping onto her face at this prospect.

In response to that, Vernon pulled the envelope out of his pocket and flashed it at Harry, who had to fight down the urge to laugh at the sight of it.

"Really, I don't know how you pull that off," Sirius said eagerly.

Every bit of it was covered in stamps except for a square inch on the front, into which Mrs. Weasley had squeezed the Dursley's address in minute writing.

Only James was left frowning in mild confusion as he read that, but he didn't have to really ask as the others burst into laughter, he could guess that perhaps she had put too many stamps on, though he found it an honest enough mistake as he wasn't even sure why Muggles would put stamps on their mail.

Lily smiled indulgently as she approved, "I give her credit for asking like that and trying to be polite, even enough to do it the Muggle way."

"At least somebody appreciates it," Remus nodded in agreement, knowing Vernon wouldn't feel the same.

Harry responded that she had put enough stamps on it then, in a tone implying Mrs. Weasley's was a common enough mistake.

"Because it was," James snorted, much to the amusement of everyone else who nearly started cracking up again at the realization he would have done the exact same thing.

Vernon's eyes flashed as he snapped that the mailman had noticed.

"Be a little more worried if he didn't," Sirius mocked.

That's why he had knocked on the door, he'd thought it was funny.

"Well how dare he," Remus sneered.

Harry chose not to respond. Anyone else would be confused at Vernon's reaction,

"Damn near wish I was," Lily hissed, still wanting more than anything to have never come across this name.

but Harry was well aware how much the Dursley's hated anything that was even slightly out of the norm. Their worst fear was that anyone would know they were in contact with people like the Weasley's.

"Then they're in for a very nasty surprise." James grinned, though it had something lingering that made it very obvious this wasn't meant to be pleasant.

Vernon was still glaring at Harry like he expected a response. Harry knew he had to play this very carefully, if he did he'd be in for a real treat. Harry broke the silence first,

"Pretty sure that's because stringing words together is too complicated for his pea brain," Sirius muttered.

and simply asked if he could go. Vernon's face twitched, and Harry had a very good idea what was running through his mind, as Vernon's two fundamental rules came into play. Letting Harry go would make him happy, something Vernon strived against.

"I think I've successfully called him everything under the sun at this point," Remus groused, "and it's still not enough to cover how wrong that is."

On the flip side, letting Harry go would get him away from them that much sooner, as Vernon hated having Harry in the house.

"I hate having him in that house too," Lily snapped.

Instead of answering he began skimming over the letter again, asking who it was from with great disgust.

"I'm not surprised he automatically despises anyone who'd be writing to Harry," James sighed.

Harry reminded that Vernon had seen her before, she was at the platform from Hog- then he quickly cut himself off and rephrased, from his school.

It really bothered Sirius that Harry still couldn't speak freely in that house, like he was conditioned even before he knew Sirius would back him up now. Harry must know that Vernon couldn't do anything to Harry now no matter what he said, or Sirius would apparate there faster than Vernon's eyes could flash. He glanced at his godson now to see he looked just as sheepish and closed off as he always did whenever his life at the Dursley's was ever brought up.

Harry knew better than to go saying Hogwarts, as the name of his school was forbidden from being spoken in this house. Vernon's face screwed up as he tried to recall this, asking if she was the dumpy woman.

"Dumpy!" Lily yelped in outrage. She knew for a fact that Vernon had no right to be tossing that word around to anyone when his son's fat arse couldn't fit into a recognized sizeable pair of pants!

"That was a low blow, even from him," Sirius snarled, while the other three boys said something equal, Harry loudest of all. He may have held his tongue while in the face of Vernon, but he couldn't stand anyone saying that kind of thing about the woman who'd been so kind to him with no reason to.

Harry frowned reproachfully at Vernon, finding it rich of Vernon to be calling anyone dumpy when his own son was wider than he was tall.

The lot of them were still so angry they didn't even take the chance to laugh at the expense of Dudley again.

Vernon clearly didn't notice as he went back to the letter, and asked what rubbish Quidditch was.

"As if I didn't hate him enough already," James blustered.

Harry felt another shot of annoyance as he began to explain it was a sport played on broom- but Vernon cut him off with a yelp, clearly unable to stand hearing the word broomstick.

"Really? That word is too much for him?" Remus frowned, more confused than anything on this one. "What does he call the broom he uses to clean the kitchen?"

"Probably his wife's second husband," Sirius muttered under his breath.

He instead went back to the letter, and asked how Harry should respond 'in the normal way?' Harry explained she meant normal for wizards, using owl post.

Sirius began bouncing in place and laughing again all at once, more than happy to hear Harry had seemed to brush right past his earlier problem and was saying whatever the bloody hell he wanted to now. If Vernon did anything about it, Harry could just bring up his name and this good for nothing caretaker of Harry's would back down at once!

Vernon looked furious as if Harry had just started cussing at him. His eyes flickered to the window, like he expected someone to be there with their ear pressed to the glass.

"You mean they don't?" Lily mock demanded. "They're missing out on some golden opportunities."

He began shouting at Harry for mentioning that unnaturalness under his roof!

"You're calling my son unnatural?!" James demanded. "I've met saner people then you at Sirius' house."

Sirius cocked his head to the side like he was considering that, before nodding and saying, "Yeah, I'll give you that one."

His face began changing colors along with his outrage as he snapped that Harry was being ungrateful, lounging around in the clothes he'd put on his back!

"They aren't even Harry's!" Remus snapped.

Harry snapped back only after Dudley was through with them. Harry was currently wearing a sweater so large he had to roll the sleeves back five times, and pants so big he had to use every last notch of his belt to keep them in place.

Lily groaned into her hands, hating to think of her baby being forced to dress in something like that when those same people bought their own son whatever, whenever he asked.

Vernon roared back he wouldn't tolerate Harry speaking to him like that!

"Oh yes you will." Sirius shot back dangerously, looking pretty close to the same description. He couldn't stand just sitting here while Harry had to take this, and he should have been able to step in and say something rather than not even being in the picture!

Harry stood his ground though, he wasn't going to take any of the Dursley's stupid rules anymore.

"Least Harry's really fighting back now," James said with genuine praise. He still feared retribution from them, they were older than Harry and could still get away with something before Harry got a chance to make a run for it, but Harry wasn't ten years old anymore either. By this age he'd definitely had enough in him to at least scare them enough he could make a run for it again like he had last year if this conversation went too bad. He realized how sad this was to think about, that Harry couldn't hold one conversation with this man, and already James was fearing the worst and half hoping his son really would bolt again.

Harry was not going to eat that stupid diet, and he was going to the Quidditch World Cup. Since he wouldn't win by just shouting that though, Harry instead redirected by asking if he could be excused, he had a letter he needed to write to Sirius, his godfather.

"Ah the magic words," Remus beamed, knowing if this reminder didn't put Vernon in his place nothing would.

Harry watched with satisfaction as Vernon's face went from red fueled rage to blotchy white like sour ice-cream.

"Fascinating description as always dear," Lily gave a soft giggle, even as stressed as her husband she couldn't overlook that.

He rasped out that Harry kept in contact with him? Harry was pleased to see his eyes were now dilating in fear.

"As they should," James sneered.

"I don't know, I'm still a little offended it wasn't worse," Sirius gave a mock pout. "Think I'm losing my touch? My name should at least cause him the runs."

"Why don't you go fake murder a few more people?" Remus offered. "I'm sure that'll do it."

"That's a great idea," Sirius beamed, though there was a glint in his dark eyes showing he wasn't kidding anymore. "I know just where to start."

James gave an appreciative laugh while Harry eyed Sirius again, always unsure and at least half hoping they really didn't mean those jokes.

Harry shrugged like this was obvious, saying of course he did, all the time. Sirius liked him to keep in touch, to make sure nothing was wrong. Harry paused then and watched the pieces fall into place in Vernon's head as he realized that if he tried to stop Harry writing to his Godfather, Sirius would think Harry was mistreated. If Harry wrote and told that he couldn't go to the Cup, Sirius would know Harry was being mistreated.

"Least he can work that out." Lily shrugged. "Now I'm just wondering how hard it would be for him to understand the concept of feeding you."

"One step at a time," Harry shrugged, more than happy to point out, "and since I'm leaving now, it's no longer a problem anymore."

"Still wish you'd mentioned something to me in the first place," Sirius grumbled.

Harry pursed his lips, knowing full well why he wouldn't tell Sirius a thing about the Dursley's feeding him like that, let alone anything else. He was too worried about Sirius coming back, and the most dangerous place for him to be was around the Dursley's. He'd never risk Sirius possibly getting caught, and there was just no point in telling him things that had already happened, something he was still adamant about.

Finally Vernon relented, telling Harry to go on and tell whoever he liked he could go to this Cup thing, but the Weasley's were to pick Harry up! Then he added on to make sure he told his Godfather.

"Pretty sure he nearly broke his jaw getting all of that out," Harry beamed, getting almost giggly he was so happy to hear that. He was getting to spend the rest of his summer with Ron. He was going to see the World Cup! He was leaving the Dursley's and didn't have to keep avoiding his family's burning questions.

Harry beamed as he got to his feet and had to forcefully stop himself from whooping as he went to the stairs. He was going over to the Weasley's! He was going to see the Quidditch World Cup!

"Best news I've heard yet." James nodded, finally forcing some real cheer into himself and clinging to it as long as he could.

"Why couldn't we have just started with that?" Lily agreed.

Harry nearly ran into Dudley out in the hall, who'd clearly been lurking and hoping to hear Harry getting told off.

"Yeah, that brings up a few more memories," Remus snorted.

He was clearly stunned to see the smile on Harry.

"I'm sure it is a rarity for Harry to ever smile around there," Sirius grumbled.

Harry pleasantly told Dudley as he passed that he'd quite enjoyed breakfast, and was plenty full from it.

James couldn't help a little snort of mirth, finding it the perfect cherry to rub Dudley's face in at the end.

Then Harry went pelting into his room, only to be hit in the side of the head by what resembled a feathery tennis ball.

Lily hadn't a second to worry what could be making her son yelp in pain, but instead burst out laughing at the description along with everyone else. She wasn't even sure what it was that could be pelting Harry like that, but judging by the fact that Harry was rubbing that exact spot in remembered pain but looking more amused than anything, she had no fears it was anything bad.

Harry rubbed at the spot as he eyed the owl zooming above his head, twittering madly with excitement.

"Wasn't that how Ron's new owl was described at the end of the last book?" Sirius perked up even more.

"Why would Ron be sending Harry a letter? Surely his mum told him she was sending something to the Muggles to ask the same thing," Remus asked.

"What does that have to do with Ron talking to his friend?" James rolled his eyes.

Harry found the birds dropped parcel, and recognized Ron's handwriting in big capital letters exclaiming how his dad had gotten the tickets!

Lily couldn't repress another smirk, James sounded more excited about this than anything he'd read yet. The only comparison was when he was reading about Harry's quidditch games, and those hadn't lasted long before he got upset again. Even if she didn't care for the sport much, she was genuinely happy to see her husband lighting up at anything again.

The game would be Ireland versus Bulgaria.

Sirius couldn't even find it in himself to be disappointed his favorite team hadn't made the league, he was pent up with too much excitement to care as he exclaimed, "Yes, Kenmare Kestrels vs Vratsa Vultures!"

"I wonder how many new players are in the lineup," James began, before he launched into a whole spiel about nearly every Quidditch team, much to Lily's groan of displeasure. Yet she still couldn't bring herself to interrupt them or stop them as all of the boys joined in, she figured she'd let them have this while they could, so she went over to Remus and took baby Harry upstairs to check on his diaper. By the time she came back down and they were still in full swing she simply nestled herself back into the couch next to her husband and began entertaining her charge by producing colorful puffs of smoke for his entertainment. The high pitched giggling noise of the child finally drew the reappearance of her cat Hickory, who padded up onto her lap, curled himself around baby Harry, and began purring contently as the game chat continued.

The picture perfect scene turned out to be just that, as Lily heard a soft click and looked up to realize that Sirius had that grin on her face which meant she was going to regret asking, "Sirius, what did you do?"

"Nothing," he said at once, stuffing something back behind him. She glanced up and saw James trying to smother a laugh as he said, "We just realized how bored you got, so how about we press on?"

She smirked at them, they knew full well that hadn't worked on her, but didn't protest either.

He knew his mother had sent something to the Muggles Harry lived with, but Ron had decided to send his own note with Pig.

"Pig?" Remus interrupted in confusion.

The books print was clear as day, and Sirius just shrugged saying, "Don't ask me," while he kept going.

Harry paused in his reading to look hard at the word 'Pig' before glancing up at the owl still swirling above his head. He'd never seen anything that looked less like a pig.

Harry wanted to laugh and say his old rat hadn't exactly looked like a scab either, clearly Ron just wasn't too adept at naming his pets, but chose not to bring that up as the others continued laughing at this, he wasn't going to be the one to bring the good mood back down.

Maybe he couldn't read Ron's writing.

"Can't imagine what other word that could be," Lily giggled.

So he instead went back to the letter, where Ron had written that they were coming to get Harry whether those Muggles agreed or not,

"Forever adore your best friend," Sirius' grin got even wider at that.

that Harry couldn't miss this game, Ron's parents had just decided it would be politer to pretend to ask first.

"Pretend," Remus choked, trying to stuff his own fist in his mouth to not laugh so loud Sirius would stop.

He told Harry to send back his answer as soon as possible, and either way they'd be there at five o'clock on Sunday for him.

James was bouncing in place so much he was starting to agitate the cat, but he just couldn't stop! He was so excited to hear about this, Harry getting away from the Dursley's more than anything, but the Cup!

He added on at the end that Hermione was already over at his place, and that Percy had gotten a job at the Department of International Magical Cooperation.

"Well good for him," Lily grinned, that was a great step in reaching his ambition of becoming Minister, best Department he could have stepped into for the political side.

Ron then begged Harry not to mention anything about Abroad, or they'd all be bored stupid.

Then she sighed, knowing she and Percy's parents were most likely the only ones actually happy for him. Honestly she really pitied Percy sometimes, she wished Harry would mention the boy had more friends he could talk to.

Ron signed off then, and Harry looked back up at the owl who was clearly still pleased with itself to having delivered its letter to the correct person.

"A very good accomplishment," Sirius snickered.

He walked over to his desk and wrote out a quick letter to Ron, saying the Muggles had agreed it was okay he could go, and he couldn't wait for Sunday.

"Neither can I," all four boys muttered one last time, still unable to cap their excitement for this.

It took Harry a moment to catch the excited bird and get his letter attached it was fidgeting around so much, but then it was gone. Harry went back to his first letter to Sirius, adding a postscript that by the time Sirius received this letter he'd be at Ron's place and on his way to the Quidditch World Cup.

"I'm pretty sure you'll now be fighting the impulse to ask Harry if his dog can come along," Remus muttered under his breath. Sirius got the gist of the joke anyways, and couldn't even deny he liked the idea.

Then he tied the letter off to Hedwig who took off as well, leaving Harry alone to enjoy his cake, savoring the happiness flooding through him right now.

"As are we," Lily nodded, giving her wand another little twist and creating a puff of purple smoke for her babies delight.

He had cake, and Dudley had nothing but grapefruit;

"There's the bright side!" Sirius cackled.

it was a bright summer's day, he would be leaving Privet Drive tomorrow, his scar felt perfectly normal again, and he was going to watch the Quidditch World Cup. It was hard, just now, to feel worried about anything - even Lord Voldemort.

"I hope you keep that feeling, just for this year," Sirius sighed as he passed Harry the book, knowing by now that asking for anything more would be a miracle in itself.

[readbythestarlight]

for the meme: whoever your two favourite characters on critical role are c:

So this took me a couple of days to answer because I couldn’t decide who my two favorites were. I love lots of characters! And then it was like should I choose my two favorites specific to the M9, or should I just try out of the whole entire very wide spread cast of both PCs and NPCs alike. Then I was stuck with not two but THREE, so because I can’t narrow it down any further, here are my THREE favorite characters on Critical Role.

1. Caleb Widogast

How I feel about this character

Where do I start? Caleb has been my favorite from the beginning. He falls 100% into my type of good person with a past they regret, kinda hates themselves, needs hugs desperately. His learning slowly to open up to people, the times he’s (often painfully) admitted how much he cares about them. How he went from by his own admission just using the Mighty Nein to caring for them as his own found family, would do anything for them, would die for them? The times when he steps up and leads and really shines in the part. His book holsters. Like oh my god this nerd carries his important books in holsters!! The flare he puts into his spells. The way he loves his cat.

And like his interactions with the M9!! The way he softens whenever Jester does something nice for him? The special connection he has with Nott/Veth and the way her faith in him pushed him to do all he could to help her. The Team Dad conversations he has with Fjord. The siblingness with Beau, where sometimes they fight and sometimes they hug awkwardly but they would die for each other?? The way he connects with Yasha and they have these quiet moments of solidarity where he makes sure she knows she’s important to them and that she is a good person. And the way he’s clearly to this day still trying to figure his relationship with Caduceus out but he gives him books and stuff. GOD. I love Caleb and I love how Caleb loves his family!!!

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Early on I shopped Widofjord and still on rare occasions get some warm fuzzies if I think about it. I kinda sorta shipped Widomauk but I think that was more like because there was so much art/fic than because I was actually naturally drawn to it.

Right now and forever even if it kills me: Shadowgast. Essek/Caleb. Give me that good good good “falling in love with a man who is the literal shadow of myself, my narrative foil, a drow who I see so much of myself in and who I want to help save if he’ll let me because I know who he is and I know why he’s like this” like god just fuck me up like that why don’t you.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Caleb x self-love and forgiveness.

Caleb and the whole Mighty Nein always and forever because found family is my deepest joy.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Honestly I don’t think I have one. I have certain ships I don’t like but that’s not involving him directly so… Maybe that I hope he always goes by Caleb and never goes back to being called Bren?? But I don’t think that’s likely to happen nor do I think it’s probably an unpopular opinion so. *shrug*

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I sometimes kinda wish all those early theories that Caleb was a werewolf had been true because I really liked those theories.

I also 100% hope that someday Caleb gets his hand on the magic that he wants, gets his hands on the ability to change time–and makes the right choice not to.

2. Caduceus Clay

How I feel about this character

My boy. My son. Listen I loved Mollymauk, I did, but if someone was like “Molly can come back but Cad would have to leave” I would choose Cad in half a heartbeat. He’s so chill and so wise and he cares a lot, he takes care of everyone and even while he’s outwardly so calm we’ve seen that he has all these deep emotions going through him, he feels things so strongly but he doesn’t let them get the best of him. Cad is someone I would want to be best friends with, because you know he gives the best hugs and he’ll make you tea when you’re sad but also you could both pull pranks on your siblings together and it would be glorious.

Also he comes through with some of the cleverest non-combative moves and some really clutch saves and as someone who has always been more of a support character than anything it makes me so happy to see a cleric doing so much.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

No one. Cad doesn’t strike me as being especially interested.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Cad and Fjord. That whole friendship was just so unexpected but has been SO. GOOD and I want to see so much more of it.

My unpopular opinion about this character

He is perfect. He has never done anything wrong in his life and if anything happens to him I will kill everyone in this room and then myself.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I have a couple things so here’s a list:

- I want him to like lose his temper. Just once. We’ve seen him a little frustrated or even irritated, but I want him to just put his foot down and just be really viscerally angry to the point where everyone is kinda intimidated just once.

- I want to see the M9 take care of him. He’s died like, what, twice? And it never really gets addressed. The first time he’d seen his family in years and they were all turned to stone, and it was never really addressed. Cad’s a very calm guy and he doesn’t show his worry or his grief very often but we’ve seen that it is down there and I want to see more of it.

- I want him to either join in on one of Jester’s (less disrespectful) pranks, or else I want him to pull a prank on the M9 all on his own. We’ve seen that playful prankster streak with his sister, now I want to see it with his found family!

3. Essek Thelyss

How I feel about this character

Oh hot boi. I pretty much loved him from day one, and from day one was terrified he was going to be the traitor. Which he is. But I fell for him anyway and I still love him so much, even while I’m also the epitome of that Tyra Banks meme:

I still love him though. I don’t even really know what it is. Probably at first because he was all cool and mysterious. But then he seemed so lonely, and he kept helping the M9 and was especially kind to Caleb, and as they came to care about him I just loved him even more. I like his voice, and I like his sarcasm, and I like the fact that he was supposed to just be this selfish evil SOB and he would have gotten away with it too if it hadn’t been for these meddling nerds and their insistence on being his friend.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

As previously mentioned, Caleb. Shadowgast. On this side of the coin give me that “I see so much of myself in you, bright and curious and determined and full of aspirations, reaching for grand things beyond yourself; I see what I could become if I keep going this way, I see what I could be if I change, I see you reaching out to stop me from hating myself the way you do” and I just. God, guys, I’m so deep in Shadowgast hell.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Essek and the whole Mighty Nein but like especially him and Caleb (if they don’t end up romantic I still want them to be bros), him and Caduceus, and him and Yasha.

My unpopular opinion about this character

He deserves the chance at a redemption arc!!! Whether he succeeds or not is up in the air but he deserves the chance to try, especially since he has already shown regret for his choices! You can fight me on this but most likely if you try to attack me about it I will block you.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Redemption! Like not right away, not in a single act (no star wars nonsense in here where people think one “selfless” act and then dying after means you’re redeemed), but in one or many lifetimes of using his skills to make things better. He can’t undo the war he helped start but he can spend the rest of his lives helping to repair some of the damage and to make sure that it doesn’t happen again.

….Boy that was long. But THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE ASK @jivvin

and for letting me ramble about my boys!! I miss them desperately so it was fun to gush about them.

[oliver-do-the-twist]

How the Van der Linde Gang showers

(Don't worry its sfw)

Feel free to boo me if I'm wrong

Arthur

this man is a pretty regular showerer

when he gets the chance of course

his showering time tho? not regular

it entirely depends on his mood

when hes happy its like a quick 5 minute shower done and done

but when my guy is sad he will shower until the water gets cold and then some

he just needs the comfort ok??

leave him alone

Dutch

God save anyone who intervenes with his showers

hes in there for an entire hour 

and  he has a plan a structured way of cleaning himself 

sugar scrubs, exfoliates, hair and skin masks, mustache shampoo  

its all there

I would need a whole different list for just his after shower routine

but it mostly consists of him just oiling up his hair again despite all the time washing it

drives everyone up the walls with how much time it takes, but the only person who ever complains is Hosea, because everyone else is to afraid to

but then he doesn't shower until a few days later with the belief that longer showers= less showering

Hosea

Pretty average

he sees showers as just a quick way to clean off 

5-10 minutes done

but if anyone messes w him when hes bathing???

they're gonna need more than God to save them

his bath time is for HIM and HIM ALONE

he gets the candles, nice music, wine, dims the lights if he’s not reading a book

its really his time to unwind and not deal with Dutch’s crap

that’s why its so important lol

John

Ha

HAHAHAA no

Dutch and Hosea tried to make him once, everyone is still getting over the trauma

Once he starts getting more serious with Abigail he does try to be a little cleaner for her though, and she respects that even though he's still reallly greasy

Javier

Oh you know this man is a singer

He takes his hygiene very seriously, but sometimes he forgets to even wash himself hes so busy performing his concert shower

His vibrato will echo throughout the house

He always seems to shower when Bills taking his nap and his singing causes Bill to go into a blind rage

Micah

Actively tries not to shower

But once he saw how much Dutch takes his showers seriously he tried to clean himself a little bit

He quickly gave up

Mary-Beth

Showers are THE prime time for day dreaming for her

So her showers take like, forever

Sometimes like Javier where she'll forget to actually wash herself

Likes the finer things, she'll pay extra for the good products

Charles

Ok I might get hate for this

But he's not a regular showerer

BUT that doesnt mean he doesn't keep himself clean

He knows alternatives to showering because he knows how to survive for long periods in the wildness where there arnt showers

He does like good smelling stuff tho, he'll find good smelling herbs and flowers to stuff in his pockets to smell nice

he considers a good shower a nice treat, and therefore when he does shower it takes forever

Sadie

Showers quick, to the point

Kinda sees them as chores so she doesn't try too hard, just gets them out of the way

Does the bare minimum, could care less about her hairy legs and what you say about them

Sean

Showers like, maybe once a week or two unless he's bullied into more

It takes him forever to do it and he still somehow does a bad job at it

Tilly

Her showers are about 20-30 minutes

She loves to pamper herself with nice things

She actually really likes to shower, she likes the physical act of scrubbing away all the dirt and grime and the feeling of cleanliness

Kieran

I'm sorry but this sweet boy is not very clean

Have you seen at his greasy head of his??

He tries, he really does, but he just can't get the hand of showering regularly

Not to mention he's terrified of getting in anyone's way, if anyone wants the shower while he was planning to use it, he'll immediately give it up

Abigail

She used to like taking her time in the shower but ever since Jack was born she doesn't have time to :/

She still makes it a priority, but its not as possible as it used to be

As Jack got older, (like 2 or 3 yo, not rdr1 age) she would shower with him more often than not (its not weird, she's his MOM)

She always liked splashing with him and playing fun water games

Jack

Little baby loves showers!

Its all playtime and fun when he showers with mom

He is always fascinated by the fact that Abigail can make bubbles with her hands by blowing through them, he always tries to copy her but he always blows the bubble too hard and it pops

That never stops him from trying again tho

Trelawny

Dont even get me started on him lol

Bill

Honestly, he forgets to shower

Until Mrs Grimshaw uh,, gently reminds him

Even then he'll just step in, let the water run over him for a few minutes and call it good

He is then forced back in by Susan with a bottle of two in one body wash and shampoo and isn't allowed out until a good portion of it is used

Lenny

He thinks hygiene is important.

He knows it's important to be presentable, so he makes a nice habit of showering

His showers arnt anything fancy, just the basics, but that's better than some of these people here lol

Molly

Everyone HATES when she's in the shower

She's like Dutch in that she takes forever, I mean hey, this girl was raised nice, there's nothing wrong with getting rid of all the dirt and grime that comes with running with outlaws

Except unlike Dutch, she'll get a lot of hate from the meaner members, poor girl

Loan shark

Very hygienic, his showers have been mastered for ultimate efficiency

Thinks he's better than the people who don't shower regularly

Karen

She likes the idea of being clean

She thinks she showers more than she does, gets annoyed when someone (Susan) will point out that she needs a wash

Her showers also take f o r e v e r

Swanson

Poor man likes to be clean

Which really sucks when hes so drunk he can't tell what day it is

Once he does clean up his act however, he does make a pointed effort to keep himself clean

He sees it as a way to keep himself together

Pearson

Lol why would he shower?? His sweat is free seasoning

Really tho he has a version of the hygiene routine he practiced in the navy, its just not so routine

But really he's just lazy and thinks he's entitled to not have to clean up for people because he feeds everyone

Susan

Between keeping the camp running and keeping everyone alive she doesn't have much time on her plate for much

But does that stop this woman? Hell no

She won't let excuses get in the way of her hygiene

She has mastered the art of quick and effective showering

Thinks that because she can do it, everyone should (she's right)

Uncle

The King of excuses

But they swing both ways, he'll either make an excuse on why he has to use the shower before anyone else does and for as long as he wants, or he'll come up with any reason not to shower

Either way he's a pain to deal with, per usual

[thewolfisawake]

Critical Role

Favorite character:

In CR1, Percy and Scanlan. And gonna sound so hipster but I did legitimately like Percy prior to the Briarwood arc. I liked his place as the more subdued person that didn’t need fanfare for his support. And then I was scared and intrigued when he was more...forthcoming in that arc since he was quieter before (I think I read this was also because Taliesin was bit shy starting out but got comfortable). And Scanlan, was the man I shed tears for because I kept crying ‘oh god, someone please notice. Someone HELP HIM.’ They both had some serious gut punches and their stories did shift the dynamics (of the story and the party respectively) permanently. They are also great support and yet also had some amazing solos. 

In CR2, Caleb and Fjord. I just like me some sad boys apparently. I think Caleb’s bumbling and trying to do right but struggling with doing what’s good for you so painfully relatable. As of writing this, I haven’t caught up yet but I’ve seen him make such leaps and bounds in terms of letting people in and being a support to others. I also think mechanically he’s a show of how the drawbacks like his fear can make for good moments. As for Fjord, he’s just in general how I think a moral compass or herder character can be done without irritating both the player and viewer. I mean morals of this cast is more wonky but in general Fjord seems to put forward a general ‘we all get through this’ and respect towards the team. 

Least Favorite character:

In CR1, Keyleth. And no, it’s got nothing to do with Marisha. She’s cool. I honestly felt bad for her because Keyleth had to pick up the moral slack whenever Pike wasn’t there, which was often. Some of her best moments were when she had to draw the hard line. But it was far outweighed with having this moral high horse for some reason even though they promptly do something just as low down as the ones she looked down on. Also, I feel it’s hard to do a character that is naive but also very likable so again, sorry for Marisha. 

In CR2, I like so many but I’ll go with Mollymauk. And it was a bit of a shame because he was like the one person I heard so much about. I did like that he was the one that tended to push into some of the best shenanigans I’ve listened to. However, he was just fine. There wasn’t much to push him into love him so much nor much to say I dislike him. I’m a little disappointed of not being able to know what his deal was I guess was what I would choose if I have to say what made him least favorite. 

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

Vax’limore - Their interactions just oozed banter and playfulness. There was no intro to how that this happened, it just jumps into their flirtations. And it was that cute banter and the real ‘I’d do anything for you, my friend’ that ended up hurting seeing Gilmore have his heart strings pulled as they did. Like if you love him, let him go. For real. Don’t dangle it in front of him like that. 

Pike/Percy - Weird thought but I thought it was pretty clear that Pike liked Percy. Everyone sees her as a stalwart beacon but she still has wants and falls off from time to time. But she tries. And she saw something within Percy that was dark and I don’t think it was necessarily ‘I want to fix him’ but ‘I want to save him.’ And Percy find a light in Pike like many do but also seeing her as just Pike.  

Perc’ahlia - I mean, it’s canon. Thing is that I can’t pinpoint a moment when it began. Just that it happened and that felt okay. I think they’re both maniacs in their own right and it’s kind of cute how they indulge each other’s passion/excitement. Gifts feels like Percy’s love language and he shows it so much in how he tinkers for Vex and her glee in what new way she can fuck shit up is enough for him. And also it’s really delicious the parallel with them and the Briarwoods and Laura has stated that if Percy had died died, that it was possible Vex end up the same kind of menace Delilah was. 

Vex/Zahra - In some other life, they would have been the femme fatale couple. All of their interactions were enjoyable and they so clearly enjoy each other. Just looking over and it’s the eyes with them.

Widobrave - Partners in crime. I think that their dynamic isn’t simple and that’s what’s so interesting. They see each other as someone to protect and don’t exactly see how the other views them as the one to be protected. And they have ‘without question’ sort of trust in each other and are genuinely awed and so happy when they witness one do something great. It gets sad with more of their backstory. And it gets me that both immediately felt guilty for keeping it a secret from them. Not the entire party, their partner. They both have seen past appearances and see the strength, the zaniness and the brilliance the other possesses and I can’t wait to get to more of their moments. 

Character I find most attractive:

CR1: Gilmore. My god he was gorgeous. Vax why did you just walk away from that? Raishan. Look, she was hot and smart and even if she fell eventually, she made the most of when she was there. 

CR2: Cali is so frickin’ adorable. Like she’s so cute and hey, if not for the whole cult chasing her thing, it’d be nice to stick around and sightsee. I am also a ‘Jester is really cute’ person.

Character I would marry:

I don’t really think there’s anyone I’d actually--well, I think maybe Pike because stronk lady that can get into mischief with but at the same time just be able to be content with.

No one in this campaign so far. 

Character I would be best friends with:

I would LIKE to be friends with Cassandra because everyone continues to ignore how this woman has been tormented and then thrust into very important position. All while harboring guilt for what she had to do to survive. The girl needs a break and I’m here with a blanket and some tea.

I would like to be friends with Nott actually. She’s really cool and I think it’s fun to let her be her zany self. 

a random thought:

So who is really credited as the inventor of firearms, Percy, who did technically make it, or Ripley, who is the one that sold the schematics to make them mass-produced? 

Is there just an abundance of mysterious magic ladies in Wildemount or what? 

An unpopular opinion:

Scanlan deserved his anger and feelings of being unappreciated. Even if he was brought back, it does not lessen that there was uncertainty nor the lack of respect towards his body. Vox Machina had gotten cocky and it drove one of their members away. Vex and Vax were the only ones that took Scanlan’s frustration to heart and did not mess up with Tary for that reason. Also Tary was a parallel of the worst of the party, which is why most of them couldn’t stand him. 

The small races are not fucking children. I don’t get why they get called children or thought of like that. They’re just short, goddammit!

My Canon OTP:

CR1: Perc’ahlia for above reasons.

CR2: None to be seen so far?

My Non-canon OTP:

CR1: Because I’m hella fucked up, I am enamored by the thought that Percy had a crush on Ripley. Because she paid attention to him, one of the younger and less interesting of his family. And to him she was brilliant and she took advantage of that, which is how he survived or why they got in. And Percy never forgot or forgave her. 

CR2: “And they were roommates” “oh god they were roommates.” * whispers * I kind of liked Fjord and Molly. They felt like foils that were amicable with each other aaaaannndddd actually had nice interactions? 

Most Badass Character:

CR1: NO MERCY PERCY

CR2: Shakaste is pretty awesome and Khary Payton is awesome. 

Most Epic Villain:

CR1: Raishan. Like I wish she could’ve been a bigger villain but alas the dice were not on her side. I think her arc was the most interesting as she was the true threat in the party’s eyes despite there being a dragon terraforming their home. 

CR2: At this point? There hasn’t been a major villain for the party.  

Pairing I am not a fan of:

I don’t really have anything I can’t ship in this one.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):

Can’t really say anyone ‘screwed up’ since this is a lot of improv and all that. So I guess miss chances I think would only really be Molly since y’know, he’s dead. 

Favourite Friendship:

CR1: Pike & Grog - They’re Best Buddies, y’all. I can’t get over how much they just pal around like that’s just the usual for them. And technically it is. They can go get wasted together and then kick ass after. It’s just the casualness of their relationships and how much respect and lack of reverence that I like. Pike is just Pike to Grog so he finds no reason to hold back or hold her as a light unlike the rest of the party. But he does want to do good by her because she’s his friend and he doesn’t want to disappoint her. And Pike never insults Grog’s intellect and actively works to help him improve and deflects the party’s remarks of how he is. 

CR2: Empire Kids - They’ve come a long way from their seats of mistrust and standoff-ishness. I think there was a post that put it best that they’re ‘learning how to human.’ And because they both are at the same point of it, they are struggling together. As a result they’ve come to lean on each other to keep themselves from going to far. They’re not perfect but they’re trying to keep this found family of theirs together. 

Character I most identify with:

CR1: Keyleth. Being the one to try to keep people together or on the straight on narrow isn’t easy. It sucks and I’m not usually the person that should do it but here I am.

CR2: Caleb. I am very off-beat and odd but I do want to have friends and the like....just not stellar at showing that...

Character I wish I could be:

I mean, this is D&D where awesome shit goes on all the time. So anyone I guess?

[cassercole]

the one where they reunite

The world had never been so quiet. Even when half of it had disappeared. That quiet didn’t even compare to the heavy silence that folded over them like a weighted blanket. She kept her face buried in her older sister’s chest for a moment longer, not being able to face the world quite yet. Not after one of her idols, her mentor, had left it. 

When she did finally pull away, she didn’t dare look over her shoulder. If she saw him again, she knew she wouldn’t be able to keep herself together. Hell, she was barely keeping herself together as it was. She went to look up at her sister, before realizing she didn’t really need to look up anymore. They were almost the same height now. A reminder that the last five years had actually passed.

Q’s hands smoothed down her hair and moved to press against the sides of her face, wiping away her tears with her thumbs like their mother should’ve done when they were children. There was a soft, sympathetic smile on her face, understanding exactly what was going through Molly’s head even though it had been five years since they had last seen each other. 

“It’s okay. It’s alright.” she soothed, comforting her younger sister in the most tragic of times. Molly’s lower lip trembled as a fresh set of tears threatened to spill down her cheeks. It wasn’t alright and it wasn’t going to be okay. Molly wasn’t sure when it ever would be again. 

“I missed you.” she admitted, voice shaking a bit. Q let out a little laugh, almost in disbelief; she never thought she’d hear Molly say something like that, willingly. 

“I missed you too.” she responded, not really sure if she had or not. The details of what happened to her after the Snap were still a little fuzzy. But nonetheless, she was glad to see that her sister was alive. 

“I’m sorry I was such a shit.” Molly sniffled out, once again making Q laugh. How strange to be laughing at a time like this. 

“That’s what little sisters are supposed to do.” she reminded her before running her hands down her sister’s hair again, “But you aren’t so little anymore, are you? God, look at you.” she gave her a small, almost proud smile, “I turn to dust and you grow up.” Molly let out a slight scoff and ran her hand under her eye before the tears started to fall again.

“Had to.” she admitted, wanting to end it with a little joke, but it felt too serious to. Giving her an understanding smile, she nodded and lifted her chin up a bit.

“I’m proud of you, Molls.” Q told her sincerely. Molly immediately shook her head at that, knowing she didn’t deserve it.

“No, no, you shouldn’t be…” she trailed off for a moment before sniffling, “I did terrible things.” her voice trembled at the thought of her actions in the first few years after the Snap. Q shrugged, almost a little too casually for the weight her statement held.

“Who hasn’t?” she asked; she had done some terrible things too, so had everyone in their family. At this point, you weren’t a Barnes/Proctor if you hadn’t fucked up once or twice, “It doesn’t matter now. What matters is that you have a second chance, right?” she dropped her chin down to give her a pointed look. Molly sniffled and nodded in agreement. With another smile, Q wrapped her arms around her sister and pulled her in for a hug, kissing the top of her head soundly. 

After a moment, Molly pulled away from her sister feeling a bit more ready to look over her shoulder at the scene behind them. The first thing she saw was Peter standing off by himself. His shoulders were hunched like he was being crushed by the weight of the world. The mask of his suit dangling in his fingers, ripped and torn to shreds. Eyes ringed red from crying and dust and blood covering his face. He was heartbroken, just as she was, but everything that had just happened. 

“Go.” Q whispered softly and with a step back from her, “He needs you.” she nodded, almost encouragingly, like she knew how difficult it was going to be to really reunite with Peter after missing him for five years. 

Still, Molly turned away from her sister, only to look back once to make sure she didn’t disappear again, before walking over to Peter. Once she was close enough, she reached out to him and her hand brushed against his. He jumped in surprise, making her laugh a little; even with his Spidey-sense he still never knew when she was coming -- she wasn’t deemed as a threat to him. 

At the realization that it was her, he gave her a watery smile all while pulling himself up a bit straighter in an effort to look tough and strong. 

“Hey, Molls.” he greeted her, voice cracking under the weight of what they just witnessed. She reached out to intertwine her fingers with his, stepping closer to him as she did.

“Hi, Pete.” she responded softly, not trusting her own voice to go any louder. There was a beat before Peter threw his arms around her and pulled her in for a tight hug. He squeezed her into his body, almost trying to meld himself to her but also desperately holding on as if he were afraid he was going to turn to dust once more. She buried her face into his neck, realizing she was taller than him now, but choosing to focus on the fact that he was there, really there. 

“I missed you.” she repeated what she had said to her sister, but it had a different meaning when she said it to him. 

“I’m here now.” he assured her, sounding strong despite how he looked. He pulled away to continue, stuttering a bit as he did, “Though I mean...I mean I know it’s been five years so…” he left it hanging, neither one of them wanting to believe that they had been a part for five years. But she nodded because they had, 

“Yeah…” she trailed off sadly, reminded of all that had happened between the time they had last seen each other. 

Five whole years had passed. It didn’t matter that she was always one year younger than him; she had caught up and surpassed him. He was still seventeen while she was almost twenty-one. The same ages her parents were when they met. 

“I mean, it’s fine. I understand.” Peter said, getting her attention even though he was dropping his head to look at the ground. She raised her eyebrows at him, surprised at his response. 

“Are you okay with it?” she asked, referencing the clear age difference between the two of them now. 

“You’re brilliant, Molls,” he answered with a slight laugh and pairing it with a casual shrug, “I couldn’t expect you to wait that long.” he admitted, making her brow furrow.

“Wait, what?” 

“Yeah...yeah...I mean we can still be friends, right?” he asked almost hopefully. Her heart dropped to her stomach at his question. He didn’t want to be with her anymore -- at least not like they were. 

“Peter, what are you saying?” she tried to ignore her heart twisting in her stomach. Was he trying to break up with her? Right then? Damn he had terrible timing.  

“I saying that -- that I’m okay with the fact that you moved on. I mean, I’m sure he’s a great guy and -- and I’d love to meet him.” Peter stepped back and motioned to her, not noticing right away how her eyes widened. She let him stutter through his explanation for a moment more before laughing a bit. At her reaction, he trailed off, face turning red even through the dirt and soot, “What?” he asked, suddenly nervous.

“I-I didn’t move on.” she laughed a bit more, feeling a little weight lift off her shoulders, “I wouldn’t ever -- I thought you’d be more concerned about the age difference.” she gestured between them. Peter shrugged, twisting his mask around his hands,

“It’s not that much of a difference, right?” he asked sounding a bit nervous. She took in a breath and swallowed back the lump in her throat, 

“I mean, it’s five years. It’s -- I’m twenty-one now, Pete.” Peter’s eyes widened at that, knowing it wasn’t that far away for him, but still it was a pretty monumental birthday he had missed. She could drink, legally, and vote, and buy lottery tickets, and rent a car -- with some extra fees…

“Oh, right…” he trailed off, realizing what she meant by it all. She gave him a sad smile, nodding and assuming that he changed his mind. The age difference between them wasn’t a lot, honestly, but the fact that he was still technically a minor… that was a Lifetime movie waiting to happen, “Maybe, we could just...hang out, right? I mean, I’m gonna be eighteen in a few months anyway.” he didn’t know if that was true, not really sure what month it even was. She let out a little laugh and shook her head, 

“I don’t know…” It seemed too easy to be true. But when she looked back at Peter, he looked so hopeful and she could tell he just wanted one thing to be okay again. Normal like it was. “We could try.” she gave in and his face immediately brightened, his posture relaxing a bit. 

“Okay, cool, cool.” the wringing of his mask stopped and he looked genuinely relieved that she agreed to be friends with him until he reached eighteen. Though after everything that happened, he wasn’t sure anyone would care that they were dating even though he wasn’t a true adult. So many people were probably in a similar, or even worse, situation than them, but still. Better to be safe. 

He took a small step toward her to close the space between them. His hand reached for hers and she allowed him to take it, the feeling of his fingers intertwining with hers bringing her more comfort than she ever realized it could. 

“I didn’t...I did some things…while you were gone...” she started to explain herself, wanting Peter to know the whole truth before he decided she was worth it. He looked at her curiously, almost puppy-dog like which made it even harder to finish her sentence, so she ended up going with the least harmful one, “Like not finish high school.” she settled on and his eyebrows went up at the mere mention of school.

“Oh, shit, you don’t think they’re gonna make me…” he trailed off, mild panic at the thought of having to continue his education even though he had missed the previous five years. 

“I think so, yeah” she laughed a bit as he tipped his head back and groaned, “I mean, our entire class got dusted that day...Ned, MJ, Betty...” she trailed off, remembering what it was like to watch her friends turn to dust while she didn’t. Peter’s face dropped a bit, suddenly looking so sad for her, 

“So you were all alone? All this time?” he asked quietly. She swallowed back the lump in her throat, shifting her grip in his hand. She could only manage a nod, not being able to tell him the story of that day and the years that quite yet. 

“I -- I had Steve.” she managed out, looking across the grounds to where Steve and Q were standing with their arms around each other, foreheads pressed together, talking quietly and catching up on the last five years. 

“I thought you hated him?” Peter was confused, having remembered the last time she spoke of Captain America. She laughed a little, returning her gaze to him, 

“I did….still do sometimes…” she took in a breath before letting out slowly, “But I had him, which was a lot more than what most people had.” she smiled to herself, remembering how Steve was the one who pulled her out of her depressive, self-destructive spiral a few years ago. Tolerated her even when she was stubborn or whiney or tried to make a move that wasn’t appropriate in any way, shape or form. He stuck by her. Helped her work through the unimaginable because he was working through it too. They were family after all. Literally and figuratively. 

“Well, I’m here now.” Peter repeated himself and pulled her from her thoughts, giving her a small smile before letting out a breath, “And I don’t plan on turning into dust again anytime soon.” he looked down at himself, just to make sure what he was saying was true. Molly gave him a soft smile, feeling a giant weight being lifted off her shoulders. One that had settled there for the last five years. 

“You better not.” she raised her eyebrows up, making it clear that it was never an option. Peter gave her one of his trademark half smiles that never failed to make her smile too. 

And suddenly, she believed what Q had said earlier: it was okay. It was alright.

[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E30 (August 14, 2018)

Note: Storms in my area tonight were messing with my internet, so I had a few brief outages to contend with!

Tonight’s guests are Laura Bailey and Travis Willingham AND THE TEENY BABY. Everyone is understandably distracted. Brian: “Let’s just show the baby for an hour.”

Announcements: Electric Beargaloo is up on CR’s YouTube, and a limited-run Honey Heist t-shirt is available on the store!

@critrolestats for this episode: 

Fjord, Jester, and Yasha were missing for 6 days in-game (Laura and Travis were gone for 6 weeks out-of-game).

Jester’s cast Cure Wounds 38 times and Healing Word 6 times. Cure Wounds is her most-cast spell. Laura: “I am so happy about Taliesin making another healer. Me, personally. Inflict Wounds! Inflict Wounds! Inflict Wounds! Spiritual Weapon! Toll the Dead!” Travis: “That’s the mother of our child.”

Travis was definitely intending to distance himself from Grog with Fjord’s more sensitive character. A lot of Fjord’s backstory is based on things that happened in Travis’s own childhood, and while he’d normally want to keep those things protected, he was curious to see what it would feel like to share those with a character, and he’s already feeling a stronger sense of investment in that sense. Laura asks if he likes Fjord more than Grog. Travis: “I can’t really love anyone more than Grog right now, because Grog is bae.” Maybe in fifteen levels... He talks about how expectations shifted toward him in real life after he went through a growth spurt and came back to school as one of the tallest kids in his class: as a parallel to that, Fjord is being perceived as so handsome and charming and a leader after having had exactly the opposite experience through most of his life.

Jester does feel a bit abandoned by the Traveler. “This terrible thing happened, and nothing helped her in those dark moments when she was asking for him.” Laura doesn’t want to get into it too much, since it’ll come into play in the game. Is this the worst thing Jester’s ever experienced? Laura: “Well, yeah. Jester hasn’t done hardly anything.”

Jester doesn’t feel especially guilty, but “she wants everybody to be happy and wants to make other people happy, so in this situation where she’s the least happy she’s ever been, there’s an extreme desire to fix it.”

Emotional healing is much more important to Jester than physical healing.

Fjord didn’t really know how much he might’ve been worth to the rest of the Nein. He thought they might’ve come for Jester or Yasha, but not him. Travis: “Maybe not that far. Just from what he’d seen so far, he thought, ‘Nah, we’re lost, they’re not going to come for us. There’s so much they have to do.’”

Laura wanted to cast Sending (even if it was totally unhelpful), but Matt told her it wasn’t possible in her current situation: they knew how to deal with casters, and she wasn’t able to talk.

Gif of the Week: Jester dancing.

Laura was really bummed not to get to say goodbye to Kiri. They both wished they could’ve made it to the live show. They’re also super disappointed they didn’t get to play with Sumalee and Ashly.

Fjord’s “going to endeavor to keep trying to look out for everybody. He’s just hard on himself for a momentary lapse of perception. He’s going to be more motivated to take care of some shit.”

Laura and Travis realize that Fjord and Jester can both disguise themselves. Travis: “We could bone with anyone and anyone else! We can take suggestions.” Brian: “I’m thinking of some merch ideas.”

Taliesin sent Laura and Travis Caduceus’ art before anyone else. He checked in with Laura to make sure she was okay with another cleric, and she was really happy. Laura: “His domain is totally different from mine. A lot of times with Jester, I couldn’t do a lot of spells in the RP aspect of the game, because I had to save them for in case there was a battle we were playing. There are so many fun just-fuck-with-people spells she has.”

First impressions of Clay? Laura: “I love his hair.” Travis: “The dude abides. I didn’t even feel like an insight check was necessary. He just seemed so positive and nonplussed and go-with-the-flow. I think a little chillness was needed. If he freaks out and goes all rage monster, I will love him even more. He’s gonna eat people.”

Travis and Laura didn’t have any plans going in regarding their reactions to Molly. Laura: “I didn’t expect to get so emotional over it.” They were jumping in and out of watching episode 26, since they had a one-week-old baby at the time. Later in the night, they pulled the episode up and realized Taliesin wasn’t there... and found out from the chat what had happened. “We fucking go have one baby...” Laura: “Molly would still be alive if we were there. I feel like we would’ve told them to run.” Travis: “It was still a good plan, though, honestly. The dice just screwed them.”

Absorbing Summer’s Dance was “most definitely” Fjord’s tribute to Molly and wanting to get him vengeance. It was especially hard because they were roommates the entire time. “Fjord has never really had friends or companions, much less somebody you had to talk to every night before you crashed out. As crazy and different as Molly was from Fjord, he never judged Fjord.” Fjord’s last conversation with Molly was about how the ship exploded and what happened, and it was “the first time Fjord started to trust somebody with that shit, and he got fucking killed.”

Jester’s taking being a cleric much more seriously because she doesn’t want more friends to die, and she’s starting to understand the stakes of what she does. The cleric-related jealousy of Caduceus was a bit of bleed-through. Laura: “I need to remember that I’m the one that’s competitive and Jester is not. Because that definitely is my go-to.” Brian: “Yeah, you in real life are much closer to Vex than to Jester.”

Fanart of the Week: a great combat group-shot!

Both Jester and Fjord’s primary motivations have changed. Travis: “A little less seeking outside answers and knowledge to things that aren’t really going to help.” Laura: “Jester’s primary motivation of just wanting to bring joy has maybe increased even more. We’ll see how far that goes.” Travis really wants Jester to go dark. “See, now I’m sad that I made Jester happy. But I do think as we level up, Jester’s Spiritual Weapon should get more and more badass. A lollipop with spiky sugar on it or something. Rock candy mace.”

Fjord saw the Cloven Crystal reveal as just another sign of the universe telling him, “Fucking get after it, son.”

Matt gave them a five-minute summary of what went down right before the game, and then left it up to them to work out how they’d play it in-game.

Laura thinks the Gentleman’s bad news. Travis: “Oh, you think? He took fuckin’ samples of our blood.” Laura’s pretty sure he’s tied in with the slavers in some way, but Jester hasn’t got enough information to get suspicious in-game.

Fjord was genuinely impressed with Jester’s ability to---to him---sound upbeat even in captivity.

Fjord was starting to become comfortable that maybe the Nein looked to him for some sort of leadership, which he’d only had some brief experience with during his days on ships, but that took a pretty hard hit. Travis: “He’s encouraged to see Caleb as a team player and looking out for others, and that the first thing he tried to do was make us feel better. He expected a fair amount of, ‘You fucked up.’” Laura: “He was really, really nice.”

Laura reveals that Jester’s actually a cannibal serial killer. You... heard it here... first?

Fjord was surprised to see how much growth there was for Beau in the six days they were gone. “She seems mature, responsible. She didn’t punch any kids. It’s awesome.”

Jester thinks Yasha’s wings "look really badass”. She also doesn’t think anyone has as close a tie with their deity as she has with the Traveler (at least, before this recent uncertainty).

It’s tough for Fjord (but not so much Jester) knowing they can’t achieve revenge against Lorenzo, but they’re still hopeful for closure. Fjord would consider a good kill with Molly’s sword to be closure. Travis: “It’ll be taking care of the group, making sure something like that doesn’t happen again.” Jester: “I don’t know what will get it for Jester, honestly.”

Talks Machina: Are We Out Of Time Yet?

Ronin’s class? He’s very loud, so maybe a bard, but he has monk-like kicks. They think he might’ve been learning from Laura’s battle-heavy VO sessions in the womb.

Laura loved the “case closed” moment, even though when she first heard about it, her initial thought was “Nott closed a case without me!?!”

Travis was surprised that nobody else perked up at the description of the Cloven Crystal. Laura: “Nobody cares about your backstory but you.” Dani: “I care!” Travis: “THANK you, Dani!”

It was really hard for them to miss the first episode in the new studio, since it was such a milestone. They also hate that they missed the first PC death.

Sumalee got booked on a new TV show, and mentioned on Twitter that the first thing she got asked was what it was like to be on Critical Role.

They reminisce about Liam’s evil one-shot they played with Ashly and talk about how vicious Travis gets when he’s not on your side. Endgame for Fjord? Chaotic evil, clearly.

At Ren Faire a few years ago, Travis went missing from the group after some drinking. They eventually found him at a rare coin stand, and he showed off an old coin he’d just bought. Brian: “I’m like, ‘How much did it cost?’ And he just looked down.” Travis: “DON’T SAY THE NUMBER.” Brian: “The shame immediately kicked in.” Laura also dropped a dagger in a porta-potty. Brian: “The Ren Faire takes a toll.”

We fade out on Brian walking away while Laura and Travis sing ‘You’ll Be in My Heart’. As you do.

[ivyquinnauthor]

12, 17 and 25 for the ff writer asks please :)

Responding to the fanfic writer questions, if anyone else wants to ask some, feel free!

***12 - Who is your favorite character to write for?***

I guess since I’ve written pretty consistently in three fandoms so far, I’d list the ones that I liked the best for each or used to like. I mean, I was first in Buffy fandom so Spike. In Smallville---which I can’t write for anymore at all cause whoo boy all the scandals there turn my stomach----I liked Chloe Sullivan but again the real life terrible, literal cult stuff means I can’t do anything in that fandom anymore, and I haven’t written for that character in over 4 years. Such things happen. In Lucifer, I prefer Lucifer the most cause lots of just angst to mine but also sarcasm, lol.

************

***17) Post a line from a WIP you’re working on:***

Honestly, I have a few I spin plates for, keep up in the air, between two multi-chapter fics and a sort of interconnected series of one-shots. So, lines from the following:

A) From “Recurrence” - 

As musicals go, he appreciated ones with a more intense difficulty level and, in that regard, The Music Man left much to be desired. Doing the quid pro quo to show the lads trying out for Harold Hill how it’s supposed to be done was far from a challenge---he much preferred being out with Ella in Vegas with some Lady Luck---but he muddled through the inferior song anyway. After all, trouble with a capital T is something he knew everything about.

B) From “This Ebony Bird Beguiling” - 

He wasn’t sure how he got from playing helpful house guest, preparing sugary-laden treats for the urchin and the detective (when Chloe woke up, talk about a rough night) in a sunny beach house to giving Trixie Espinosa preening advice. Oh, don’t get him wrong. His interminable life had been nothing but bizarre, depending on whose perspective one took, but it usually didn’t vacillate between almost mind-numbingly boring and human one moment to worrying about someone else’s loose pin feathers the very next.

C) From “Queer Eye for the Chef Guy” (next Culinary Advice one-shot) - 

“I agreed to this, sort of, because you clearly need a distraction while Linda works through the whole you’re-the-devil-thing.”

Lucifer narrowed his eyes at Gary. “You have a fine talent for making the infernal and, frankly, formerly---very formerly---divine sound mundane, Preston. It’s more than a just a ‘thing.’”

Oh Christ...wait shouldn’t even think it. He'd gotten the devil extra prickly already. “Fine then. You want a project, and I want to keep Ms. Smith happy and, by extension, both my arms intact, but does it have to involve my clothes?”

“These!” Lucifer said, holding up a pair of cargo pants littering the floor. “Cannot be labeled clothes. In fact, do you have lighter fluid? Never mind I can immolate anything...”

“You can what?” And he didn’t yip, not really. Okay, maybe a little.

“Well, what all do you think I can do?”

Gary pinched the bridge of his nose. If he’d known that, he’d have just dragged his rucksack to Lux. Let Lucifer accidentally set his own bloody flat on fire.

***

And just cause sometimes I keep notes on things to do one day if little scraps of things come to mind, a couple snippets from stuff that’s just ideas and files for now:

A) From “Hair of the Dog” - 

He should send Miss Lopez home. Lucifer knew that the moment he spotted her arguing with Patrick in a very colorful and completely un-Ella-like mix of Spanish and English curses grumbling about being cut off. A good person would call her an Uber or even a private car---he could more than afford it---and send her home with a spare bottle of aspirin from under the bar to boot. Lux kept plenty of other first aid remedies around. After the hangover she was sure to have in the morning, Miss Lopez would even thank him for such chivalry. 

Except Lucifer was not a good person. 

Just a week ago, after the worst moment of his long suffering life, the detective had more than established that to her, he was not a person at all. And it was perversely impressive that in literally billions of years of existence, including permanent exile from his entire (mostly rubbish) family and burning for millennia in a lake of fire, that the detective yelling about being terrified of him would be the worst, but it was. So, no, Lucifer was not a good person or even pretending to be one right now. And he was well and truly soused for once after a steady effort at not only drinking every handle in his personal bar and half of Lux’s but also from downing more than his fair share---celestial metabolism or not---of some molly from the last party he hosted in the penthouse.

He was probably for a precious hour longer even less clear-headed than Miss Lopez. So when he pulled her away from the bar and smoothed things over with Patrick, he couldn’t quite make himself send her away, especially after she curled into his side. He definitely couldn’t refuse her suggestion to go up to the penthouse either...

B) From “What to Expect When You’re an Expecting Devil” - 

“No.”

He arched an eyebrow back at his therapist, who, to be fair, was also his former lover (and before things got utterly complicated and pear-shaped, he’d still have kept up that arrangement with her; she was that good as he found the uptight ones tended to be when they got a chance to let loose), currently the mother-to-be of his first ever nephew, and the only other person in history that he or Amenadiel knew about who was also dealing with a celestial pregnancy. Which sodding perfect. However, just because they were all kinds of enmeshed and, eventually, would be family and boy had his brother cocked that all up (literally), it didn’t mean he had to always listen to her.

If his track record was anything to go by, he rarely did.

Still, Linda kept her hand held out till he relinquished the handle and then coughed at him till he yielded the tumbler too. There were demons he’d beheaded in Hell for far less insolence. Sad state of affairs he’d reached where a wisp of a thing who couldn’t even hope to come up to his chest got him to acquiesce with merely her glare.

“First of all, if this is even...whatever Remiel thinks she senses and it’s assuredly not that because Dad likes his jokes but that’s...” He stuttered a bit there. “I am not that. Even if I were, I don’t think drinking would hurt the little larva and, maybe if it did, bully for everyone. Surely, by now you’re at least passingly familiar with Revelation?”

Linda’s glare hardened, and she gestured to the bar. “Don’t even. I’m not drinking with an angel-baby cause who even knows and you’re not going to...”

“With the antichrist?”He bit back, tone cutting, but the fight leaking from him. “If Remiel is right---and let’s all just hope she’s not because her spider sense is busted---I’m going to need to a drink or all of them worse than ever now.”

“No, Lucifer. Not self destruction for one or, well, both of you that way.”

He pursed his lips but grabbed a bottle of water from behind the penthouse’s bar instead. “Fine then. I suppose that’s the price of you being the only doctor I know who can help me out on the other end of things, you know, if Remy’s not just cracked.”

Linda blanched. “Nope not doing. First, there’s such a thing as too much family togetherness but also I’m not even close to that kind of doctor and it’s been three decades since medical school. Add in that...” she paused then, fumbling for the politic way to phrase something, he was sure.

“Right, like I said, the antichrist. Maybe. I don’t rightly know, John was very stoned when he wrote all that down. Psychadelic nightmare fuel and all that. So, then, I just go it alone, again, assuming Remy’s right?” His hand strayed to his hip because, honestly, self preserving powers of denial aside, even he knew something was really different about him these last two months.

And it shouldn’t intimidate him to have Linda waddle over to him with her eyes narrowed and, if anyone but Amenadiel ever asked him, it didn’t. Not really.

She sighed and bit her lower lip. “Okay, so not an optimal idea, but I have a friend from my residency and his son’s really talented just tends to fuck up...I mean he has his license but if you pay enough....no questions asked so that was what I was thinking?”

“Question or a statement, love?”

“Little of both, but I’m sure no booze is good booze till seven months from now.”

Lucifer drained his water. “Well, and I thought I knew something about Hell. Clearly, I was wrong.”

*******

***25) Have you ever cried writing a story?***

Yes, I have. Back when I still wrote Smallville, I have a very dark trilogy of stories called the Lara-verse. When writing two parts of that series, Black as Sackcloth and Of Wolves and Lambs, I cried because the first involved some fairly gruesome and distressing lead character deaths and because the second dealt a lot with dissociation and PTSD. Honestly, I never finished the series with the four installment because it was such a weird, hard headspace to be in that I just didn’t have the strength to go back to it. It’s on my livejournal here if anyone reads Smallville - https://legendarytobes.livejournal.com/?skip=30&tag=lara%20verse - people would have to friend me there to read, but if anyone’s that curious, feel free to.

[letterstothemidnightsociety]

It’s been a wild few weeks but surprise! I am back and I am still watching two dudes beat up ghosts and look pretty. It’s Supernatural! 

Alright so here I am on the penultimate disc (thanks Lemony Snicket) of season 2 and at this point in the series we should be ramping up for the season finale. If you look back at this point in season 1, that meant putting the Winchesters under heavy fire (with the one funny episode), but this season it feels like they’re more interested in philosophical, emotional ramping than action ramping (with one funny episode). 

So many FEELINGS!

And you know what? I gotta hand it to Kripke and Co., cuz they figured out what worked in season 1 (brothers and feelings) and they leaned into it this season (brothers + feelings = 15 seasons). It’s a little hit and miss, but the core of season 2 is all about the line between Monsters and Men. I say hit and miss because we have spent a LOT of time on Dean this season but these episodes are all about Sam. And Dean’s arc is very different from Sam’s. Dean’s emotional arc is all about how he’s done with hunting, he’s done with sacrificing, which is WILD if you think about how early in the series this is. And yeah, it does, it does tie in to Sam’s troubles but it just doesn’t feel as clean as it could. Maybe it’s just because they spend much more time on Dean’s feelings? Maybe it’s cuz I personally pay more attention to Dean that I feel this way? But also, consider: the ep where Sam seemingly goes off the rails is all about Dean’s internal struggle with whether or not he can waste his own brother, even if his brother is evil now. We don’t ever see the fallout from Sam’s point of view. Sam was possessed at the time, he didn’t really go darkside, but also, Sam was possessed at the time??? And we don’t see any emotional fallout from that?!?!?

Nah, we’ll just end on this cringy joke about a girl being all up in Sam for a week and deflect away from our problems, nbd.

Kripke has mentioned in interviews that he thought the mythos of this season was muddled and that the psychic children plotline doesn’t really land because we never see Sam struggle with whether he’s good or not. At this point in the season, I definitely agree. They do give dialogue to Sam to remind viewers that he’s struggling with who he is, but they don’t devote enough screen time to it to make it feel like it lands. Dean’s struggle to keep Sam alive hits a lot heavier, but that may have more to do with that face and that g- d- lip quiver. 

Damn you and that lip quiver Jensen Ackles. Oh wait, this show already did!

Now we’re gonna make an abrupt turn into Sam’s emotional arc for the series. See, for the next few episodes we’re gonna follow a bunch of Monsters, right? By surface level definition, they are all text book Monsters, but they aren’t Villains, and that’s a big distinction. Because a lot of these characters are fundamentally good people, but they’re also the thing that the Winchesters have sworn their lives to hunt, so, like...how do we deal with that? 

First up we have “Roadkill”, which I like as a deviation from the regular format. There’s a lot of this tinkering going around this season, or at least, those are the episodes that stand out the most to me. I of course love Tricia Helfer (as a sort-of-but-not-really Battlestar Galactica Fan). This episode straight up brings us back to that key question this season: Are All Monsters Evil? Sam consistently draws a pretty clear distinction between Monster and Bad Guy, Dean consistently does not. Sam makes it clear that he has to believe there’s a line because if #YesAllMonsters are evil, and Sam’s abilities/destiny make him kind of a Monster, the logic follows that he’ll become evil too, or perhaps already is. 

In this ep we see Helfer as Molly, a woman who slowly comes to realize that she is a ghost who has been haunting the same stretch of road once a year for twelve years. I think Helfer totally crushes it. I think Molly as a character is hella interesting. She comes across as a pretty realized person rather than just a caricature. There’s a lot of heart in her and I appreciate that she handles The Truth pretty well, both when Sam and Dean tell her about the hauntings and then later when they reveal that she has been dead for over a decade. She asks good questions, like where DO those ghosts go once they’ve been busted? And she represents our philosophical conundrum - she’s a ghost that they have to bust, but she’s not evil. She’s not even really that bad. She’s just stuck here and can’t figure out how to move on. By the logic of the show, if she sticks around for too much longer she’ll start to get corrupted, but for now she’s just a scared, lost, woman trying to find her husband. She even starts to sympathize with the actual bad guy of the episode, a man she vehicular-manslaughtered but who comes back every year to torture her. 

And in the end, she finds peace! This is the second ghost this season that they actually lay to rest, not just defeat, and it’s nice. I think it’s nice. 

Is it odd that, for an episode that should hit so close to Sam’s internal struggle, the whole story is told from Molly’s POV? Again, I loved it, I love seeing the Winchesters from an external point of view, but it is...interesting...

Then we get “Heart”, which just digs deeper into the themes we got in “Roadkill.” 

This time, our Extra of the Week is another unwitting Monster. Emmanuelle Vaugier plays Madison, a kind of kickass lady who is really getting her shit together. She’s dumped her bad boyfriend, she’s killin’ it at work (lol), she’s out with friends, she’s a homeowner - this chick is LEGIT. And damn if she doesn’t know what she wants. Almost from the minute that Sam steps into her house she is into him, like, into him. She knows exactly what she’s doing when she dumps that basket of panties in front of him to “fold” them. Their chemistry together is good and honestly I was pretty thrilled for both of them when they got down to business. 

Good for you, you crazy kids! Good for you! 

But tragically, Madison is also werewolf. She’s completely oblivious to the fact that she is definitely murdering people on the full moon. When Sam finds out, and then finds out that Madison is not only unable to control her transformations or murders, but also unaware of what’s happening entirely, it’s another blatantly obvious metaphor for what Sam is dealing with - do supernatural powers make me a monster? Does being a monster make me evil? Does it count as evil if I’m not in control of my actions? And I love that this forces Dean to re-evaluate his stance as well. Cuz see Dean (and I love the guy) views things in very black and white terms, rarely asks questions and is 100% ready to kill this girl because she’s a Monster, full stop. Sam throws this back in his face with the line “So me you won’t kill me, but her you’re just gonna blow away?”, reminding us that Dean’s attitude is pretty damn hypocritical. And I say all of this as a Dean stan who loves watching that lip quiver, but also I am much more in agreement with Sam’s line of thinking on this - we can make a distinction between Monster and Evil in this show. I think ultimately, Dean starts to do this too, but just not in this episode. 

To their credit, they do try to save Madison, but failing that, they realize that Madison can’t be saved and so she’ll have to be put down - they can’t save her, so they have to kill her, if you will. It’s a surprisingly emotional climax and got pretty heavy at the end when Sam - who’s trying to figure out if he is worth saving - has to...what do we want to call this, a mercy killing? An execution? I don’t know, it’s mostly just a hell of a gut punch. A well done gut punch, but a gut punch nonetheless. 

The first lady that Sam bones since his fiancé and then you’re just like, and now you KILL her! Damn, show, what is WRONG with you?!?

I have to point out that we end the episode on Dean’s face. Like, I’m not mad about it, I am thrilled that on the list of Things That Work, Kripke and Co. were like, oh yeah, gotta put in as much Sad Dean Face as possible, but also, this was Sam’s episode? So shouldn’t we...get one final shot...of Sam? Like, I’m not crazy, right? They’re really pushing Dean this season, right? Who is this season supposed to be about?!?!?!

This is it! This is the last shot of the episode! This Sam-Centric Episode!

And then after all that heaviness and spiritual questioning, we get our Funny Episode. Meta Episode? Doesn’t matter. 

“Hollywood Babylon” is A+ Great and I love it. I love watching shows about shows, it is my jam. Watching this time, I did wish they’d thrown in more niche? Like, I just felt like the inside jokes could have been more inside, but also, Dean was SO happy in this episode, I didn’t even care. We so rarely see anyone in this show be happy, it’s nice that they get a break sometimes. It’s also weird that Sam seemed to get the most break? As in, he was getting a break from this episode entirely, especially since the last episode was a pretty heavy emotional arc for him? It’s a weird choice, but not something I really noticed because I was distracted by Dean working his way up from PA to Grip in like, a day, and I was just so proud of him. Anyway it was nice. It was NICE!

He’s doing SUCH a good job!

In this episode, our super special Extra of the Week is another lady, the fictional actress Tara Benchley played by Elizabeth Whitmere. I should probably stop using the term extra, by SAG/AFTRA standards she’s (probably?) a Guest Star, but honestly aren’t they all background extras in the lives of the Winchesters? Anyway, I appreciate how they portray Tara. They could very easily have written her to be a real piece of work. She could have been a whiney diva, she could have been a ditz, she could have been any number of Actress Tropes, but she seems pretty even-keeled. She has a certain amount of clout on set, she is friendly with the crew, she’s given a character trait that’s shared by real life actor Jensen Ackles - they really do treat her with a surprising amount of respect for an episode that goes real hard on producers and studios and horror generally. And she doesn’t die! So that’s a plus! But she does sleep with Dean which is...I mean...also a plus? I don’t know. I love Dean but I sometimes wonder how much sex he’s actually had? Like, if you told me it was 75% exaggeration, I’d believe you. Unimportant side head cannon. 

And then our final episode on this disc, “Folsom Prison Blues”. About time those boys went to jail, honestly. 

What can I say? The boy looks good in a coverall.

We get the return of Henricksen in this episode which is fun! We get a pretty kickass public defender, Mara White (Bridget Ann White), who is also fun! And we get Prison Dean, which is maybe the funnest. 

I like the twist with the prison warden - where you think that he’s going to be all aggro and corrupt and it turns out that he’s actually, like...looking out for his charges? In a...In a nice way? I guess? He wants the ghost to stop killing the people in his prison is the only fact that we get in the script, but it leads me to believe that he takes his job seriously and he wants second chances and better lives for all the cons in the yard and that makes me happy. He is also another in a long line of father figures that would have done a better job raising Sam and Dean, but that’s not important. And yeah, some of the cons are probably in here for good reason, but Lucas seems real nice and Tiny literally has a conversation with Dean where he explains that he’s basically just a product of bad parenting + Low Self Esteem, so on a low key level this episode is saying the same thing - just because these prisoners are technically “monsters”, does it mean that they have to die? Does that make the killings in this prison right? Everyone from Dean to the Warden seems to think not. Side note, that story from Tiny sounds eerily like Dean’s own life experiences, so he should probably have paid more attention to it but I guess he was busy getting cardiac arrest from a ghost so whatever. 

If this story wasn’t just RIGHT on the nose. 

Cuz that’s right, we have a psycho lady vigilante ghost! She does not believe in second chances and is killing cons from beyond the grave with her heart attack powers. And if we look at the low key metaphor tie in that the episode might be trying to make here, then you could argue that the show is coming down pretty hard on this one - just because you’re a Bad Guy doesn’t mean you’re a bad guy! Stop shooting first and asking questions later Dean!

It’s not your fault, bb, you were raised by a dumbass. 

And all of this buildup leads to...”What is and What Should Never Be”, possibly one of my fav episodes for Reasons, but guys it’s another SUPER heavy Dean episode, you could even say that Sam, the real Sam, isn’t even in, like 75 - 80% of it before we...get...to...Sam’s season finale? You know what, that’s next week’s problem. 

As much as I’m enjoying the stand alone episodes for this season especially, the mythos/arcs here are kind of a mess. I think the 20 ep seasons are instrumental to why audiences love the show, so I don’t want to take episodes away, but I do feel that a shorter season could have streamlined this season arc better. With fewer episodes, you have to focus your story so much more and sharpen your storytelling that Dean’s Arc and Sam’s Arc would probably feel more connected if they tried telling it in 8 - 12 episodes instead of 22. But then we wouldn’t have gotten the show that lasted 15 seasons, so would the trade off be worth it? Maybe some day we’ll find the alternate universe where Kripke waited 15 years to bring his series to Netflix and we got 5 short seasons of something completely different

[softpink]

A Year on Spotify: 2017

100. Fat Lip - Sum 41 - I can’t believe this song invented music.

It’s none of your concern, I guess I’ll never learn I’m sick of being told to wait my turn

99. Energy - Drake - I love being part white.  This was a go to gym song when I was in a bad mood, which was A LOT over the summer.

I got girls in real life trying to fuck up my day, fuck going online that ain’t part of my day

98. Bad Girls - M.I.A. - Erin and I always listen to this song while driving anywhere together, even though we are the two least bad people I know.

Live fast, die young, bad girls do it well

97. Nerve - The Story So Far - You know, I used to always complain about how the self titled was their worst album.  In the past year, I have found that I actually like this album better than What You Don’t See. You set your pace, I’ll keep mine too

96. Seventy Times Seven - Brand New - Too bad Jesse Lacey is a TRASH CAN and Brand New is CANCELLED.  I’ve honestly just stopped listening to Brand New near the end of 2017.  Too many of the song (Maradona, Sudden Death, Sic Transit Gloria, etc) made me TOO uncomfortable. This song is still better than There’s No “I” In Team tho Have another drink and drive yourself home, I hope there’s ice on all the roads And you can think of me when you forget your seatbelt, and again when your head goes through the windshield

95. Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac - This song STILL slaps.  I’ve never cheated on someone, I’ve never been cheated on, but damn this entire makes feel like I’ve done both of those thing excessively.

Loving you isn’t the right thing to do How can I ever change things that I feel?

94. There, There - The Wonder Years - This is my PEAK anxiety song.  I’ve never had a song that encapsulates what my specific anxieties feel like so well.

I’ve got my heart strung up on clothing lines through tenement windows in mid-July

93. Wildest Dreams - Taylor Swift - This song is so GOOD. Have you ever been hooking up with someone in secret? Ever had to end things with someone when you didn’t want to? Ever only have fond memories of someone? This is the song for YOU.  I remember listening to this song a lot freshman year of college in the fall, how long ago that seems.

Say you’ll remember me, standing in a nice dress staring at the sunset babe Red lips and rosy cheeks, say you’ll see me again even if it’s just in your wildest dreams

92. Goodmorning - Bleachers - I am pretty sure I dream about Mike more than anyone in my friend group.  I will have these intense, real dreams where I can feel him.  I will have hazy, abstract dreams where maybe I can’t see him, but I wake up and I know he’s there.  I have nightmares about the accident.  I have dreams that are just a movie reel of our old memories.  Sometimes it’s wonderful, getting visited by him, but sometimes it can almost be debilitating.  This song captures that feeling perfectly.

Woke up, I’m in the inbetween, honey One foot out and I know the weight is coming, because I left it by the bed last night Open my eyes, and I stare and pray for light Always one foot out when you say goodbye to the one that you love, one dream away from the  ones above That’s such a rhythm in my life these days, so I hold on tight and I learn to behave

91. Using - Sorority Noise - Not gonna kill myself 2k17

I stopped wishing I was dead, learned to love myself before anyone else

90. Bugatti (Remix) - Ace Hood - This is a defining song of my friendship with Will.

I’mma say this, fuck it I’ll say it: if you got good pussy you should always have your rent paid

89. Falling In Love Again - Joyce Manor - I remember when I had my first time with Michael, this song was stuck in my head.  I remember his sports themed wallpaper border in his old bedroom.  I remember looking at the streetlights reflecting off of his window pane.  I remember total bliss.  I remember his soft kisses, how held me so close afterwards.

I think you’re funny, I like your friends, I like the way the treat you I’ve got some money that we could spend, not that you’re like that I’m falling in love again I’m falling in love again

88. Nasty Habits - You Me At Six - I miss old YMAS. I wish Night People wasn’t wannabe Black Keys junk.

I’ve got you breathing all heavy and deep, gasping for air and down on your knees You’re in love for only as long as you want to

87. Shimmer - Moose Blood - I remember sending this to Molly, I want to send her my deepest apologies.  This song is so sad, I’m glad it doesn’t apply to my life anymore.

It’s been awhile since I saw you You don’t look the same, you taste different too

86. Run Away With Me - Carly Rae Jepsen - This was the first song we listened to on the DC roadtrip.  That was one of the best weekends of my life, I can’t wait for all the places Maddy, Will, and I go in the future.

Oh baby, take me to the feeling I’ll be your sinner in secret When the lights go out, run away with me

85. Something Right - Microwave - This song makes me irrationally sad?

Last night you told me you were pregnant My throat collapsed, I couldn’t breathe You said there’s a little man inside you, who looks a little bit like me

84. Reckless Love - Bleachers - I love having to come to terms with emotional and sexual abuse! People fucking suck!

So give me a chance to remember, what I’ve given up to defend you I have burned my dreams away, to stand in the broken shadows of your reckless love

83. You Tore Out My Heart - Tiny Little Houses - I remember listening to this a lot in August.  August was a hard month.

I’m so tired of being afraid, and I’m so sick of wasting away And there’s no truth in whatever you say You tore my heart out again and again

82. The Let Down - Seaway - This is their best song

Oh it’s all the same, if you feel the same we’ll never change

81. Meet Me In the Hallway - Harry Styles - THIS! ALBUM! DESERVED! MORE! It’s so good.  It’s the best thing anyone post split has put out.  I listened to this album non stop when it came out.  This song sounds like a dream I’ve had in the past.  This song sounds like hoping for that late night text, this song sounds like longing.

We don’t talk about it, it’s something we don’t do Because once you go without it, nothing else will do

80. Closer - Chainsmokers - I know everyone hates this song but I like this song whoops

Four years no call, now I’m looking pretty in a hotel bar

79. Local Man Ruins Everything - The Wonder Years - This song has gotten me through every single rough patch in my life.  Anytime that I’ve needed to move on from something in life, this is THE song.

I don’t have roses in the closet, but I’ve got pictures in a drawer It’s everything left in me not to stare at them anymore

78. I Think I You Were In My Profile Picture Once - Modern Baseball - This song used to remind me vaguely of Scott way back in the day, but now it is purely a Mike song.  I remember laying in my bedroom with all the lights off after the funeral and just listening to this song. It’s funny how drastically things can change.

Covered in bottles with the stench of a loss of life And I know that it’s quite heartbreaking we won’t speak like this again

77. Blissth - Sorority Noise - Emotional trauma: the song

You’ll always be like a nightmare to me, and I’ll always be begging for sleep

76. Don’t Take the Money - Bleachers - Do you ever have a song that just makes you feel alive? This is that song.

You steal the air out of my lungs, you make me feel it

75. 10 Bands - Drake - This is the best song off of If You’re Reading This… This is THE Drake song to listen to while driving in rain at night when you’re pissed off.  I can’t tell you how many times this summer I would drive around blasting this song being pissed off.  Also, my favorite lyric to this song? Iconic.

My ex asked me “where you moving?” I said onto better things

74. I Wish You Would - Taylor Swift - I don’t remember listening to this that much this year? This was a genuine surprise to see.  I DID listen to this a lot in the early fall of 2015, when things were in a weird place with Scott.  Once again, that feels so long ago geez.  I remember feeling like this song was all I was ever going to feel like.  Thank God for moving on, Thank God for change.

It’s 2 A.M. in your car, you pass my street, the memories start You say it’s in the past, you drive straight ahead You’re thinking that I hate you now because you still don’t know what I never said I wish you would come back, wish I never hung up the phone like I did I wish you knew that, I’ll never forget you as long I live

73. 505 - Arctic Monkeys - Has a song ever given you anxiety, made you sad, and made you want to get laid all at the same time?

But I crumble completely when you cry, it seems like once again you have to greet me with goodbye

72. Chicago Is So Two Years Ago - Fall Out Boy - This song makes me want to punch every person who has ever wronged me DIRECTLY in the face. You want apologies? Girl you might hold your breath until your breathing stops, forever The only thing you’ll get is this curse on your lips, I hope they taste of me forever

71. Out of the Woods - Taylor Swift - I love Bleachers.  Anyway, I love to listen to this song while driving by myself late at night, it’s a very surreal feeling.

Looking at it now, last December We were built to fall apart, then fall back together

70. Dakota - A Rocket to the Moon - If Molly or Bethany is in the car, this song is never skipped.  I miss power pop.

I know that she barely knows me, and I’m fake in love with her It’s like I’m singing karaoke, and I forgot the second verse, but I can make up my own words

69. Harvard - Diet Cig - Remember when my ex, who I hadn’t spoken to in YEARS decided to send me a long ass message apologizing for shit that I no longer desired an apology for? Remember when this happened in a fucking Denny’s? Remember when at the end of the message, he somehow managed to make it all about himself and his annoying ass liberal arts school in the woods of Vermont? 2017 was the year of people not being able to Leave Me Alone.

Does it feel better in your ivy league sweater? Put your work shoes on, and talk about her at your shitty job. Does it feel better in that cold Boston weather? Fuck your ivy league sweater, you know I was better.

68. Corrigan - Sorority Noise - I remember listening to this song while driving to the job I hated.  This song has nothing to do with working a dead end desk job, but I always seem to associate it with that?

I will never be the one you need I only hope to be the solid ground beneath your feet I will never be the turning of your leaves I only hope to be the one you call when you can’t sleep

67. Fall Into These Arms - New Politics - This was also a surprise, I don’t remember listening to this a lot this year.  It is on a lot of my playlists because it’s catchy af, so that must be why it made the list.  I remember listening to this in fall of 2015 (honestly, what WASN’T I listening to a lot in fall of 2015) while feeling like I was drowning in poor choices.

Fall into these arms, and spend the night with a stranger like me

66. Style - Ryan Adams - This song is HOT. Also my favorite line really resonates with me. This has been in my top 100 since 2015 when this came out, it’s SO good.

You’ve got that long brown hair thing that I like You’ve got that good girl faith and ass so tight

65. Right Back At It Again - A Day To Remember - Wow I love being emo? This song always reminds me of the Cheektowaga gang.

So here I am, right back at it again, just like I always said

64. Pretense - Knuckle Puck - There are about five KP songs total that I enjoy, but this song SLAPS. This was another song that I would listen to a lot in August of this year.

Consider this the repercussion of the actions you were never properly punished for Due to an overbearing demeanor brought on by your own self awareness Your credibility is a half empty glass of salt water that I watched you spill over and over and over again Go ahead, make me the bad guy

63. Grapefruit - Aaron West & The Roaring Twenties - This is THE SADDEST SONG TO EVER BE WRITTEN.  I listened to this whole album a lot throughout this year, it’s such a good depression album.

In all my dreams, I’m in the house that I grew up in I’m trying to be half the man I know my dad is, or was I see me as a father, looking over a daughter Who grew up to be just like you, and now It’s just a thread I can’t hold onto It’s just an open wound

62. HUMBLE. - Kendrick Lamar - This was a go to gym song for the first half of the year, but honestly by the second half of the year I was way more into DNA.

Girl, I can buy your ass the world with my paystub

61. Doses & Mimosas - Cherub - Lol @ the time I went to a RAVE in 2017.  As someone who has never done drugs and doesn’t plan to, I don’t think I will be going to a rave ever again.  I did watch someone do cocaine right next to me in the middle of Town Ballroom.  Shit was wild.  Anyway, Cherub sucked live but I still love this song?

To all the bitch ass hoes who hate me the most, I hate you too

60. Your Graduation - Modern Baseball - This is another one of those songs that I thought I would be stuck living for the rest of my life.  I remember listening to this song on a constant loop for MONTHS my junior year of high school.  I remember making Scott listen to this when we were both very drunk, and for the first time in his life he actually APOLOGIZED to me.  NOW, fast forward to 2017 this is just a song that I like to jam out to.  I love positive growth, I hope I have even more of it in the coming year.

You weren’t the only one who thought of us that way I spend most nights awake, wide awake I never thought that I, that I would see the day Where I just let you go, let you walk away

59. Hands On Me - Ariana Grande - I’m gay

Skirt off, keep the high heels on

58. You Are In Love - Taylor Swift - The first time I heard this song, I cried so hard. It is truly Michael and I in a song. It’s so perfectly us.  It’s so beautiful.  Every single word in this song resonates with the both of us so much. I remember laying in his bed with him late at night, and he just held me while we listened to this song together.  I’m so corny, I love my boyfriend so much.

Morning, his place.  Burnt toast, Sunday. You keep his shirt, he keeps his word. And for once you let go of your fears and your ghosts. One step, not much, but it said enough. You kiss on sidewalks, you fight, and you talk One night he wakes, strange look on his face Pauses and says “you’re my best friend” And you knew what it was, he is in love

57. I’m The Best - Nicki Minaj - Whenever I want to drop out of school, I think about how disappointed Nicki would be, and I keep chugging along.

To all my bad bitches, I can see your halo

56. The Downfall Of Us All - A Day To Remember - It’s 2017 and this song still slaps

Duh duh duh duh duhduhduhduh duh duh duh duhduhduhduh 55. We All Float Down Here - Four Year Strong - It’s 2017 and this song ALSO still slaps.  I regret not going to their 10 year tour this past year, smh.

Too bad you never did have the guts to know where your heart should go

54. Septemberism - Man Overboard - This is song is the face of the early 10’s pop punk movement.  This the best pop punk song that will ever be written.  I only own Man Overboard merch. I remember feeling the floor buckle underneath us at Webster when they played this on the farewell tour.

I hate you, you should have picked up the phone tonight

53. If It Means A Lot To You - A Day To Remember - WOW I LOVE BEING EMO.  Remember when Molly and I were both crying to this song during their set and NO ONE noticed?

I swear I’ll never be happy again, and don’t you dare say we can just be friends

52. She’s Out Of Her Mind - Blink-182 - California is a bad album, but this is a great song.  It always reminds me of my sister, I can’t wait till she moves back to Buffalo.  It’s not the same without her around.

She’s got a black shirt, black skirt, and Bauhaus stuck in her head.

51. Out Of The Woods - Ryan Adams - This is better than the Taylor version, and the Taylor version is one of my all time favorite songs.  This songs sounds so different than the original.  It sounds so hopeless and SAD.

Two paper airplanes, flying, flying…..

50. Second Letter From St. Julien - Sorority Noise - While on the drive to the Sorority Noise concert: “Hey Maddy, what if they open with Second Letter?” “Nah they wouldn’t do that.” As you can imagine, that is exactly what happened.

And if you’re with God, am I making you proud by waking up each day?

49. The Waterboy Returns - Modern Baseball - For reasons unknown, I would always listen to this while driving to school this semester.  I can’t tell you why.  This song is a Mike song, so I was rolling up to 8 AM nursing lab in tears lmao.

It’s been a lifetime since we spoke last, I have a thousand things to say

48. Appointments - Julien Baker - This song makes me feel like I’m drowning, but in the best way.  The entire album was my favorite of 2017 and I am sure that every song will be in my most played of 2018.  She’s just too good.

Nothing turns out like I pictured it, maybe the emptiness is just a lesson in canvases

47. St. Joe Keep Us Safe - Aaron West & The Roaring Twenties - As a born and raised Catholic who is very close with their parents, this song makes me an unmeasurable amount of sad

I’m sorry Aaron, I know this year has been hard. If you’re hurt then you’re hurt, no I won’t make it worse, I’m always in your corner

46. Too Good - Drake - This is one of two good songs of Views.  

You’ve got somebody other than me Don’t play the victim when you’re with him

45. Feeling This - Blink-182 - This song makes me feel very sad, and brings me back to the summer when I was sixteen, depressed, and making terrible life choices

Fate fell short this time, your smile fades in the summer

44. Sundress - Tiny Moving Parts - This song reminds me of Robin and The Boys Cabin Trip 2017.  It was SO much fun this year.  It was a weekend of absolute fucking around.  We swam in the lake, we kayaked, we shot off BB guns, we cooked meals together and just bonded. Making jungle juice, playing pong in the yard, shooting off fireworks, popping champagne and getting Owen a graduation cake, doing shots of expensive tequila. Ben spending the night wrapped around the toilet, cleaning up plastic cups while everyone was still asleep in the morning because I was only one awake early in the morning.  Doing the Tops bottle return of shame, with a cart full of rattling bottles and cans.  I loved every second of that weekend.  I love that I’m still close with my high school friends, I love that I can still call them some of my best friends in life even if we don’t see each other too often.

Grab my hand let’s dance, like we used to in high school These are the golden years, let’s spend them holding beers One hand on the can, one hand in your hand, that’s my idea of romance I love you, at least I used to

43. From the Dining Table - Harry Styles - Wow I miss Haylor. This song is sad, like most songs I listen to, go figure.

Maybe one day you’ll call me and tell me that you’re sorry too Even my phone misses your call, by the way

42. Back to Back - Drake - Look, this summer was a whole bunch of bullshit and I’m glad it’s behind me

Trigger fingers turn to twitter fingers

41. Break Your Heart Right Back - Ariana Grande - This is an UNDERRATED Ariana song. It’s catch af, this was also a go to gym song this year.

I should have saw it coming, I should have saw the signs But I wanted to believe you, just you, you said you wouldn’t lie

40. Fourth of July - Fall Out Boy - All of my favorite FOB songs are written about Mikey Way

I wish I’d known how much you loved me, I wish I cared enough to know I’m sorry every song’s about you The torture of small talk with someone you used to love

39. Your Best Friend - Seaway - I lied, this is Seaway’s best song.  A great song for when you’re annoyed with people who you don’t want in your life anymore.

I hate when you whisper to me that you think you should be the one who could be taking me home Because you’ve got problems, and I never asked to solve them

38. Forever - Drake - I LOVE BASKETBALL

LIKE A SPRAINED ANKLE, BOY I AIN’T NOTHING TO PLAY WITH

37. Touch It - Ariana Grande - This concert with Maddy was an out of body experience honestly.  It was SO MUCH FUN.  This also started our tradition of post concert Jim’s.  This was one of the best days of 2017.

Remind me why we’re taking a break, it’s obviously insane Because we both know what we want, so why don’t we fall in love?

36. It’s Okay - Pentimento - Personal growth: the song

And it haunts me, every single world you said But I never thought I’d say this….it’s okay

35. The Place That You Love - Have Mercy - Being lied to sucks, I listened to this song a lot when all of that shit hit the fan.

So why’d you do it? Why are you selfish? Why can’t I trust you anymore? Where’s the sorry? No pity party, when you come and knock on my door

34. Moonlight - Ariana Grande - Dangerous Woman is a pop masterpiece, also I love my mans

He’s so bossy, he makes me dance Trying to sit in the back of his whip and just cancel my plans Sweet like candy, but he’s such a man

33. Cool - Gwen Stefani - Fun fact: The first time I realized I was attracted to women was when I watched this music video! Also this song is the ULTIMATE at peace with your ex song, and I am really happy to say that I believe I’ve reached that level of zen in my life

And I’ll be happy for you, if you can be happy for me Circles and triangles, and now we’re hanging out with your new girlfriend So far from where we’ve been, I know we’re cool

32. Look What You Made Me Do - Taylor Swift - This is honestly the worst song off of Reputation, but I was just very excited when she released new music so I listened to it a whole bunch regardless

Maybe I got mine but you’ll all get yours

31. Heart Out - The 1975 - This song reminds me of the couple months between when Michael and I met, and when we actually started dating.  Specifically reminds me of the night of The Wonder Years show, March 5th 2016.  I remember him having his arm around me in Town Ballroom and feeling like everything was right in the world.

You’ve got something to say, why don’t you say it outloud? Instead of living in your head

30. Your Deep Rest - The Hotelier - This is one of my all time favorite songs.  This song punches me in the goddamn face every time I hear it

Your lack of love for your dearself is sapping all of us here out Trace your roots back to the ground, work out the problem for yourself

29. Thinking About You - Ariana Grande - I cried during this song at the concert.  This song is about masturbating.

Had me arching my back, had my eyes rolling back Now you love me so good, I wish you would hurry up and come back

28. Me vs.The Highway - The Wonder Years - Remember when they only played this at the Buffalo date? I almost blacked out, I was so excited.

I remember me at eighteen Naked in your parent’s basement, young and careless, watching you blow smoke rings

27. Time After Time - Cyndi Lauper - That Park & Rec scene with April and Ann singing this? Yep.

If you’re lost you can look and you will find me, time after time

26. Solo - The Story So Far - This is the best song off of the self titled don’t @ me

I wish you’d just call, and we could hash it out I could tell you what I’m so mad about

25. Disappeared - Sorority Noise - No song has ever explained long term grief like this one

I let my hair down today, and I took a shower for the first time in what felt like weeks

24. Happy Birthday - Tiny Moving Parts - I don’t smoke weed, but this song definitely makes me feel like I do

Getting stoned in the back of a car, you have no idea where you are But you’re satisfied with life, and you don’t think twice of it

23. New Scream - Turnover - I’m really glad I’m finally in a field of study that I feel confident and happy in.  When I was in the transition between Fredonia and nursing school, I was stressed out and sad. I felt so lost, and I would listen to this song all of the time for that year of my life.

Adolescent dreams gave to adult screams Paranoid that I won’t have all the things they say I need

22. Better Man - Little Big Town - I can’t believe Taylor Swift wrote one of her all time best songs and GAVE THAT SHIT AWAY!!!

You’re jealousy, I can hear it now.  You’re talking down to me, like I’ll always be around You push my love away like it’s some kind of loaded gun, boy you never thought I’d run Sometimes in the middle of the night, I can feel you again But I just miss you and I just wish you were a better man

21. 6 God - Drake - Another go to gym song AND driving around while in a bad mood song.  This was Drake’s last good album smh

And just like every single other thing in my life, you can have her when I’m finished

20. Die For You - The Weekend - Do you really get in a fight with your partner if you don’t listen to this song?

Even though we’re going through it, and it makes you feel alone Just know that I would die for you

19. Humming - Turnover - Molly told me to listen to this song when Michael and I started dating, because in her words “it’s the ultimate lovers song.” and holy fuck, she was right.

Show me why you’re always smiling, laugh again and make me fall in love

18. Settle Down - The 1975 - This is the best song off of the self titled, no question

You’re cold and I burn, I guess I’ll never learn

17. Wild Heart - Bleachers - Strange Desire as a whole is a very important album to me.  It really got me through Mike’s death, and continues to to do this day

Now everything has changed, and it’s only you that matters I will find anyway to your wild heart

16. IV. Sweatpants - Childish Gambino - I think I listened to this every single day in the month of August, holy shit.

You’re faker than some sweet and low

15. Our Apartment - Aaron West & The Roaring Twenties - I remember being SUPER SICK at this concert, and Michael took care of me so well the whole time. I love my peach so much oh my God.

I found enough of your hairpins to build you a monument, a statue to loneliness

14. I’m Serious, I’m Sorry - Jeff Rosenstock - The lyric I’m about to share is my autobiography and I’m going to get the entire thing tattooed down my ribs like the Jasey Rae girl. I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve screamed this bridge in my car while driving by myself down the 990.

Were you supposed to not go to college? Stay in your mom’s house on the computer Googling grief cures, talking to no one Waiting for life to start feeling better Waiting for pain to not be a constant

13. A Change Of Heart - The 1975 - Such a good “I’ve moved on” song

You used to have a face straight out a magazine, now you just look like anyone

12. …Ready For It? - Taylor Swift - I’m gay

In the middle of the night, in my dreams You should see the things we do, baby

11. Two Ghosts - Harry Styles - WOW I MISS HAYLOR

We’re not who we used to be We’re just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me Trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat

10. I Don’t Fuck With You - Big Sean - I’m so glad this made the top ten. Thank you to Big Sean for CLEANSING us with this song.

Everyday I wake up celebrating shit, why? Because I just dodged a bullet from a crazy bitch

9. I Wanna Get Better - Bleachers - This song has been integral in me coming to terms with grief and bettering myself as a person.  This is the ultimate hype track.

I chase that feeling of an eighteen year old who didn’t know what loss was

8. Love Me - The 1975 - This is the song that really got me into The 1975

A decline in the standards are what we accept

7. One Last Time - Ariana Grande - This is the most underrated of all of her singles, smh.  It’s so good?

I don’t really care if you’ve got her in your heart I really care is you wake up in my arms So one last time, I need to be the one who takes you home

6. Your Ex-Lover Is Dead - Stars - This song takes my breath away. It’s so fucking real, it’s so accurate. I love this song so much, I’m surprised it isn’t higher on this list to be honest.

It’s nothing but time and a face that you lose I chose to feel it and you couldn’t choose I’ll write you a postcard I’ll send you a note, from the house down the road from real love Live through this, and you won’t look back There’s one thing I want to say, so I’ll be brave You were what I wanted, I gave what I gave I’m not sorry I met you, I’m not sorry it’s over I’m not sorry there’s nothing to save

5. No Halo - Sorority Noise - This song reminds me of Shawn, I think about how he didn’t come home for Mike’s funeral a lot.  This whole album meant a lot to me, and Citizen cancelling their show and Sorority Noise playing a full set is one of the best things that happened to me in 2017.

So when you show up to my funeral, will you be wearing white or black?

4. Sex - The 1975 - I didn’t realize I listened to this much 1975 this year, lol

Now we’re on the bed in my room, and I’m about to fill his shoes But you say no, you say no

3. Bonfire - Childish Gambino - I listened to this during every workout I did this year, it’s such a pump up song

Tell me how I suck again my memory is hazy

2. Somebody Else - The 1975 - This song sounds like Depeche Mode and I am in love with it.  It’s so pretty, and my sister and I would listen to it together all of the time.

I’m looking through you while you’re looking through your phone and then leaving with somebody else I don’t want your body, but I hate to think about you with somebody else

1. Cutting My Fingers Off - Turnover - Let the record show that if Michael and I ever break up, you can find me on my bedroom floor listening to this on an endless loop

To make you go, to make you go, I never wanted to make you go You might be a stranger now, but I just wanted to let you know that I meant what I said

[the-hufflepuff-cupcake]

Chapter Two

Take me back to the house in the backyard tree

Said you'd beat me up, you were bigger than me

You never did,

Take me back when our world was one block wide

I dared you to kiss me and ran when you tried

Just two kids, you and I

Oh my my my"

Growing up right next to the Weasleys was amazing Lilac and Ron were like the best of friends while they were growing up. This year the twins would be going off to Hogwarts which means that by this time next week George and Fred would be going and leaving the two of them. Lilac looked a little sad, her hair had turned a more grayish blue than the color of sunflowers when she was usually around the Weasleys. But George and Lilac had decided to go for a walk just the two of them. They went to the treehouse that sat in between their two yards. "Georgie, what am I going to do with out you or Freddy? Who am I supposed prank Ron with? " the Nine year old asks the older boy. The 11 year old shrugs his shoulders. "Maybe you could get Ginny to help you? " The girl nods her head thinking. " I'll miss you so much Georgie." She had told him hugging him quickly. He huffed a little and decided to say " I'll miss you too Baby Tonks " the younger girl groaned "Wasn't there something better you could nickname me? " "Well, does it bug you when I call you it?" He asked her with a growing smirk she nodded her head with an annoyed expression. " Then I think I'll keep calling you that " he said with a small giggle. She sighed and giggled too. " let's go back to the burrow my parents are probably waiting for me." She says to her best friend.

/\/\/\/\/\/\ two years later /\/\/\/\/\/\

It was Ron and Lilacs first year at Hogwarts the younger Tonks sister had been so excited to go. Thier parents had said goodbye to the girl that morning going off to work. Nymphadora had graduated last year with Charlie so it was just her and the Weasleys going to Kings Cross station and getting on the Hogwarts express. "Baby Tonks! Lest get going!! I don't want to miss the Train!" Fred Weasley had said as Lilac was getting her bags onto a trolly. She grunted slightly annoyed by the older twin and rolled her eyes as she followed the crowd of red headed children and thier mother. As they approached Platform 9 3/4 the young girl got a but nervous. A boy with dark messy hair and pretty green eyes had stutterd his way through asking how to do it Molly had explained that it was Ron's and Lilacs first time as well. They both noded smiling at him. "Percy you first," Molly prompted. And Percy ran straight through the boy blinked "Fred you next" Lilac watched as the twins tormented thier mother " He's not Fred I am!" George stated "Honestly women and you call yourself our mother " Fred said shaking his head. Molly trned to George "Right go on then Fred" "Only Joking! I am Fred" the older twin said running to get onto the platform Lilac rolled her eyes at her bestfriends. And George went in right after him " best to start at a run if your nervous dearie" Molly said to the Green eyed boy with glasses standing beside the two new comers to hogwarts. As soon as they got everything on the train both of the Weasley Twins guided Lilac to a

Carriage with two other people in it, both of them being in the twins grade one a boy one a girl both of them had lovely dark skin and pretty brown eyes "

"Hello! You must be Lilac! George and Freddy say lots of things about you! I'm Angelina. It's nice to finally put a face to the name they talk about so much!" She says smiling and shaking Lilacs hand. The younger girl giggled at the embarrassed look on the twins faces "We don't talk about her that much." George says with a roll of his eyes. "All right then, let's change the subject!" Fred starts out staring at his twin with a knowing look. "Who wants to play, truth or dare?" He said with a small smirk looking at Lilac and George. They all noded. All of them mostly either picking truth or all of the dares were kind of lame leaving them in the Carriage they were in on the train. "Lilac, truth or dare." Angelina asks smiling softly at the younger girl "um I'm gonna go with truth" Lilac says smiling back. "Do you have a crush?" Lilacs face turned as red as the Weasleys hair. "Yes" she said covering her face. All of the older Gryffindors gasped at the younger girl. "Who?" The twins asked in unison. The older twin already knowing it was his brother had knowing smile on his face looking at the younger girl. She shook her head saying " Can't say, don't want to jinx it." The younger twin huffed and crossed his arms with a pout wanting to know who his best friend had a crush on. She smirked at him and asked "Georgie, truth or dare? " " Dare" He said with a big smile looking at the younger girl " I dare you to kiss me" She said to him Everyone in the carriage gasped as they watched George lean in to kiss Lilac but what they didn't expect was to watch Lilac kiss his cheek and then run out giggling as soon as George opened his eyes. He had opened his mouth in shock looking at his twin " go find her mate" Lee had said Chuckling along with the older twin and Angelina.

As soon as she left the carriage, Lilac had decided that she was going to try and find Ron and the other boy they met getting onto the train. She went about three or four doors down from where she was with the twins and thier friends. And luckily she saw his straight red hair through the glass and she scrambled inside. Huffing for air and giggling a little to herself. Ron looked up at Lilac with a puzzled look on his face "What are you giggling about Lil?" She shushed the youngest red headed boy while George walked past the carriage. Looking for her." I dared George to kiss me."she said in a whisper smiling at one of her best friends. Ron looked at her and said " took you long enough last year you couldn't shut up about him" rolling his eyes he chuckled when her hair turned a pinkish color along with her cheeks. She covered her face shoving Ron's shoulder "Oh Right! Lilac this is Harry, Harry Potter." Ron said excitedly. Lilac had turned to look at the scrawny dark haird boy "Do you have th-the scar?" She asked the boy " oh" he chuckled and showed the two the scar " Wicked" they spoke at the same time. Smiling at each other. She spent most of the rest of her time with them , Ron had actually tried showing Harry the spell the twins had told him would turn Scampers yellow. A girl thier age with big bushy hair had walked in asking about if they had seen a toad named Trevor because apparently a boy named Neville lost one. "Oh you're doing a spell? Let's see it then" She said when she saw Ron with his wond  out. He cleared his throat " Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow, turn this stupid, fat rat yellow!" All that happened was a puff of air. Lilac had sighed and pouted a little. " Okay I better find your brothers Ron, who knows what theyve done to my robes or even my trunk." Lilac said heading for the door. " Holy Cricket's you're Harry Potter!" She heard the girl -Hermione- say. She sighed headed back to the twins and Angelina and Lee's carriage. This year was going to be interesting to say the least.

[survivormalibu]

“I’ll be back in this game VERY soon...” - Darian - Episode 5 (The irony is... he didn’t return.)

And ofc im on a tribe with all the ppl i DIDNT want to be on a tribe with. yippee. i win a challenge for my team then this happens. im just praying i can find a solid footing on this tribe in which i can float along on in peace

colin, tyler f, me, brian? maybe andrew? solid core? mayhaps. let me float in PEACE. end tribe swap culture.

Well, I knew Darian's plan was not going to go as we had hoped, and I am sad to see him go to the resort. But, I can honestly say, I love my new tribe as well! I'm glad I have Zach back, as he and I really connected from being on Escondido together (before we voted him out on his terms). I'm also glad I have Nicholas and Owen, as they are strong players. As for the others, I am looking forward to getting to know them!

Fuck tribe swaps tbh

I hope sitting out of this challenge didn't put a target on my back again. That being said I know I was targeted at the last tribal so who knows.

Y'all really fuckin did that huh. Put me on a tribe with everyone I don't know, I see what y'all are doing. I felt so secure in the brawn tribe and I was in a strong majority alliance and now all I got is........... Carson K. Who ofc saved our asses in the trivia challenge but he's also the person on the brawn tribe I was the least close to. I talked to Tyler F. a little bit when we were in One World at the beginning. But Andrew, Allison, Tyler S, Regan, Brian who??????? Oh well. Hopefully I'm not voted out next. I'm going to bed.

Alright. Round 2 of writing this because it got lost to the internet last time. Alright. Yay!!!! I'm so happy my tribe has slayyyed. Well pescador did. Carson k literally killed the trivia challenge. I'm so glad we had him. Honestly. The dream team would be the five of us (me, Carson k, Carson c, Colin, and Nicholas) I'm really bummed that I didn't make an alliance chat when we were on the same tribe. But I also really do like this new tribe. I think we are going to kick ass. Me Carson c and Nicholas are all together and I think Zach and Casey would vote with us for sure. But I really like Luke, Molly, and Owen. This sucks. But that's how the game goes. But hopefully we just don't lose. I really like these guys and I hope it works out. I'm seriously so worried about Carson k and Colin over there. I really hope that they will find a way to make themselves safe from votes. I need to make the Hpecdor alliance chat!!!! And I want all five of us in it when merge comes. I'm having a really great time playing this season. Next stop, make it to jury! Let's go!!! #honolulutribe #hpecdoralliance  

I really like my sundae so I really hope I can win this one for my tribe since I'm usually not very good at the other challenges. The little flag I made is so cute! It's going to be a good keep sake of he season. Haha. Plus, this tribe is also really sweet and awesome!

So. Disregard that last confessional. I got voted out because TYLER AND BRIAN are SNAKES. But don't you worry about me. Ill be back in this game VERY soon and Ill be changing my strategies when it comes to you boys. I hope my Boo is ok! I love her! and I need her to stay alive in this game. I can't wait to come back and shake everyone up

So heres how my week has been . . . . . That was a list of all of the things said in the resort chat. NOTHING. Im stuck with a bunch of inactive people. Which is fine by me now because I was the only one who made an ice cream sundae. AND I won reward. AND I found a MOTHERFUCKING IDOL. So I'm not even close to out. Im just chilling on the resort. Petting my idol. While y'all bitches get voted out left and right. But lowkey I want off this island bad Like Im missing the action

This tribe swap has the potential to either be really great or absolute hell. I came over with Nicholas and Lily, both of which I was really close to on Pescador. I'm really looking forward to working with them so we all can just make it to the merge. If all the brawns got back together, I feel like we'd have an unstoppable alliance come merge. I'm so glad Regan played that idol because now we know none of the beauties have it. That makes it a lot easier to target them for a safe vote since we cant get blindsided by an idol. Lily was telling me it might be easier to align with the beauties, but if we know they dont have the idols then we should try taking them out. Still, it could be too early to judge this, so I'm not making any deals until i have too.

WHEW so we got a new tribe. I remained on Humaliwo along with Owen and Molly which is GREAT because I connected with the both of them the most on OldHumaliwo so I'm happy about that. My new tribe mates are really cool. I connected with Lily the most because we have a mutual friend but Casey, Zach, Carson and Nicholas are all really cool too. I think we're a strong tribe, I think we have what it takes to win immunity challenges and avoid having to vote anybody out but I guess we'll see!

I'm so proud of myself for actually submitting a decent score. I really hope we pull off the win! Lets go #honolulu #humaliwo #whatever :P

So, I have another idol. Brian found the page, but I finished the maze first and then told him I didn't find anything. The only person who knows about either is Andrew, so here's hoping he doesn't fuck me over. I have the Escondido and Humaliwo idol at this point. So, unless someone found the Pescador idol before it was killed, I have all the idols currently in the game. That's exciting, and a lot of pressure. I'm just glad I have someone close enough to talk it over with so I don't fuck it all up, because I could 300% see myself doing there. I don't think we're winning immunity, but I have Tyler S, Andrew, Brian, and through extension Tyler F. I also think Colin and/or Regan would vote with us. Carson K may be an easy vote unless everyone wants him gone because he literally got 24 on the challenge and I'm shook. Like, I get not knowing, but like, 24? I'm shook. I'm just hoping Humaliwo and Original Escondido can do that thing tbh.

Lowkey pissed that I keep being the only one who volunteers to do things and then we have challenges where more than one person just doesn't submit.

I... I don't know what to say.  I told Ty on call that the only way he'd be safe is if we won, and that I would try and help him if we lost, but I couldn't really... um... say much about his usefulness to the tribe when he submitted 24.  In fact, both Tylers submitted a combined score of 50-something.  I cackled when I saw the results because we shouldn't have won.  Now I just have to hope that Casey goes bye-bye (she didn't submit and tends to submit low scores anyway... plus the advantage she won from the reward) so we don't have to worry about her in this game for awhile.  I just don't want Owen going.  Please.  PLEASE.  He's like the one person I want to work with in this game aside from Allison and Ty, and like... it needs to happen, pretty please. As for Regan... hm... she's a m-e-s-s.  She got upset with me and Ty because we saved her????  GURL, WHAT?!  It honestly doesn't make any sense why she's like, "I'm alone!" but we flipped for her.  We told her not to use her idol either, but she didn't trust us?  Okay, that's a little okay because we coulda been snaking her, but after we didn't... I don't know.  She dumb.  But whatever.  She genuinely confused me, but I'll get over it.  I hope she goes if we go to tribal because fuck her. Finally, some fucking loser got the advantage before I did... with no clues?  Fuck me up!!!  Unless Allison's lying (I did give her the clue before solving the maze), but even if she is, hopefully it doesn't mean my demise.  I trust Allison a ton, and I would consider her probably my second closest ally aside from Ty, but that doesn't mean she necessarily shares the same sentiment.

wow we somehow actually won immunity whew! I def didn't expect it, but I'm happy nonetheless. I was kinda worried about this round tbh Tribe dynamics are still... weird. Regan and Tyler S are pretty inactive, and the only people who like actually respond to me when I message them are Allison and Andrew. I have no idea where I fall into the mix, for all I know I could be at the bottom of the new Escondido totem pole. fuck. I miss my old tribe. I miss the chicken in a bucket alliance :((((

Feeling very anxious about this vote as any vote would go. I really like everyone and feel like everyone helps the teams. I'm currently watching season 1 and I can't remember who said it but someone basically said losing a member of the tribe will not make the tribe stronger but weaker because each person is important. I also feel this way. But someone has to go and I don't want I to be me or Nicholas and Carson so Molly seems like the best choice for us. Molly is a really awesome person and I will be sad to see her go if the plan actually works. It should be me Carson, Nicholas, Casey, and Zach all voting for molly.

THIS VOTE. A MESS. Lily, Nicholas and Zach want to vote Molly. I wanted to vote Casey because if she goes to The Resort and meets us with her bestie Darian then it eliminates the chance of a strong duo being in the main game and being reunited in a merge situation. I talked it over with Owen, my closest ally and he talked to Zach and Casey who apparently wanna vote Lily? Owen/Molly/Zach/Casey are an alliance. Since I don't want to vote against Lily, Owen told Molly to tell me to vote Zach. I'm perf with this becaue I'm not betraying Lily because she could come back from The Resort. My hands are clean. I just pray that these uglies aren't playing me.

IM HONESTLY SCREAMING RIGHT NOW  SO Of course my bitch ass forgets to link the post which like... I respect the host's choice to make the rule and enforce the rule and stuff I just also have never ever ever had to do it before so it's hard when you play games for three years to all of a sudden have to change something you're used to doing without thinking. Tea. ANYWAYS I THIUGHT I didn't have a vote but anyways I was really getting close with Lily  because we have a lot of mutual interests and we are both from Michigan and actually know some of the same people irl?? We really clicked and I love her to death and I wanted so badly to be close with her in the game. So I suggested to her that me Luke her and Carson make a group and pull in Molly and Nicholas since they were on our old tribes to target Zach. He had already been voted out so we know he doesn't have an idol, he's gonna try in the challenges, etc. it made sense like.... honestly that would been so good for them because that's two easy votes right there for the whole tribe!!! BUT THEN TODAY Ashe comes to me saying she wants to vote Molly because 'there are too many brains in the game' And I....? I'm a brain??? Why would you say that? And I gave her numerous reasons WHY it should be one of the others and basically she ended up saying she was gonna vote Molly anyways. I asked if we could compromise, and she said 'I'm sorry'. So instantly like... damn. She also said Zach and Casey were gonna vote Molly already but that didn't stop my gay ass from TRYING. Here's the thing I do not like feeling like I'm helpless??? So I went to zach and casey and I basically like really REALLY exaggerated and told them that lily was pitting us against each other! And that the brawn wanted to keep zach and casey as shields to vote out later and I really played up the fact that they were playing both sides and... and it actually worked. They both talked to Molly. And luke warned me that zach and Nicholas were close so I made sure to make it seem like it was all lily and Carson's doing lmao And zach was sayin all this stuff about how lily and regan know each other irl and I'm like... literally lily lives nowhere near Regan  right but I didn't say that!!! Lol Zach and Casey made a group with me and Molly and after I planted the seed all I had to do was just sit back and watch it grow . I was like 'yeah I'll do anything!!!!' So hopefully they aren't lying and they do vote lily... I'm sorry this has to happen, Lily. And honestly I kind of expect they're lying and it'll be me voted out. But whatever! I was put between a rock and a hard place and I wiggled my ass out of there. Sorry, but if you're not with me, you're against me :) cute!

Honestly Luke, Molly, and Owen should vote me off. I feel horrible. Everyone is so awesome. I hate tribal.

[readbythestarlight]

c2e36

So this will be 10 episodes since the one where we lost Molly. Just throwing that out there.

Also it’s apparently my 9 (NEIN) month anniversary for being subbed to G&S which means it’s also my 9 month anniversary for watching CR and also the show has been going for 9 months as of the 11th so. That’s cool.

I like that jacket, Sam.

Broadway advert lol

“Andrew Loyd Website”

“I could have backed up all night” and “I’ve grown accustomed to her encryption” I’m dead

Okay that was hands down Sam’s best ad he’s so goddamn creative

NEW YORK NEW YORK I’m so excited I loved the last live show

A SLEEVES ARE BULLSHIT SHIRT?!

I need it

Oh wait it doesn’t actually say sleeves are bullshit

I still love the shirt tho and I want one

And the bumper sticker

“It makes it sound bad when you say it like that” guys it WAS bad xD

Poor Caduceus is having an Experience

Cad: “You keep leaving”

Y: “They keep finding me”

Cad: “I think you might have the right idea”

THE FUCK? NO

guys you need to convince Caduceus to sTAY

HE’S ALIVE?!

HE HAS AN AXE IN HIS HEAD

Oh no don’t get Cad he’s sad and tired right now

I mean y’all almost left him behind which was crummy

Caleb really wanted to yank that axe out

Also how does healing work? Like does the guy have permanent brain damage in the are where the axe wrecked now? If it had hit somewhere vital to like, say, memory, would his memory be gone? Enquiring minds want to know.

When Caleb tries to be intimidating it both makes me laugh but also freaks me out a little

I LOVE when Matt has cool props

So does Travis lol

J: “Have you heard of THE Traveler”

Galen: “….Oh no not another one”

Nott and Jester building up Galen like “no no you’re totally special!!!”

“Missed all the major organs” sAM xD

“The Mist…ake” I’m crying

lol promoting this guy to first mate I’m crying

“We got a new pet!”

“Let’s call him Professor Thadeus the second!”

They forgot they had someone tied to the mast too what nerds

They cut up his nice shirt xD

I adore that Travis has totally got the islands and shit memorized so he can be super in-character

Also Cad is being too quiet it’s making me sad

Caleb The Navigator

Captain Fjord

First Mate Galen

Oh oh oh they should have a guest to come aboard and sail with them

Oh noooo they left the magic invisible cart

YES THANK YOU MATT y’all need to talk to Caduceus thank you Matt for pointing out that poor Taliesin has been silent for 30 minutes

Oh no have they somehow fucked over Cad’s mission?

I’m curious about this. Because obviously Taliesin knew this was exactly how the M9 were, so I can’t believe that he would have made Cad to be wholly incompatible with them.

He’s feeling really low and lost I think it’s time for a group hug

Him almost dying really freaked him out (and I think it really freaked Taliesin out too)

I’M HAVING A LOT OF FEELINGS RIGHT NOW WITH JESTER AND CADUCEUS YOU GUYS

Caduceus is the ship’s cook

Mmm Beau is starting to feel like Caleb is trying too hard to excuse the bad things they do

I think the dock thing was a disaster for sure but I don’t think it was necessarily that they REALLY did anything wrong?

I’m not sure what exactly Beau is feeling bad about? Like freeing the genie wasn’t wrong, the boat thing was a mistake built on bad choice but it wasn’t them being inherently bad, and they didn’t kill Algar, so?

Ah, she’s feeling like she didn’t leave Nicodranus better than she found it

I like this whole “why didn’t we try to talk it out first” thing because it’s nice that two of them are having some moral conflicts. I also like what it says about Fjord and Beau as far as character development.

I mean I don’t think boiling it down to “like we were justified in our actions” really covers what Caleb said. He did say they could have handled things a lot better, but that they did what they had to to survive a situation they could have but didn’t handle better.

“I don’t want to drive you guys away” BEAUUUU my heart

Yasha staring off south “looking for a storm”

Caduceus cooking for the group is literally just my favorite thing. They totally needed a group member who could like make them slow down and eat and just like… take care of themselves, even just for the length of the meal.

Beau went from “I’m sorry for killing these guys” to “fuck those guys they’re dead anyway let’s smear their name”

We should not split up

There’s no way any of this could go wrong

Awwww Caleb showing Nott the stars and planets so sweet

SEE Caleb understands that things went horribly wrong. I honestly think he’s just trying to keep their spirits’ up.

Nott honey you don’t have to be okay with him using suggestion, I understand you both admire and need him but you can be mad at him

“Nott is a one-earther”

Have I mentioned how much I love Caduceus?

Fjord’s just like “please tell me you mean you talk to alive grieving people and not the dead people”

Oh no

They’re coming for them

You should NOT go back

Sam is like “why the fuck are we going back” and I agree so hard

Fjord should not stay on the ship Nott is right

N: “Oh, oh, what other languages do you speak?!”

J: “I speak Infernal”

Everyone cracks up

Oh this is going to be another disaster

Although I guess the guard guys wouldn’t be expecting them to immediately come back?? Maybe??

“YOU’RE THE SAILOR GUY THIS IS YOUR WHOLE EPISODE” lol sam

“I’m gonna bake, fuck it” I LOVE CAD

“I look like Captain Crunch btw” I’m crying can’t breathe omg

Except isn’t the captain dead lol

“Unknown do-gooders” well that wasn’t the reputation I expected

UH HEY I HOPE MARION DIDN’T HEAR ABOUT THE BLUE SKINNED TIEFLING KILLING HERSELF

These lies are getting more and more ridiculous

“The little devil girl who drowned a hundred years ago” Taliesin and the idea of a ghost story is just… so perfect.

Beau stop xD

If this ghost story isn’t in campaign 3 someday I’m gonna cry

I’m so glad that Orli is coming along

They hired the tortle! :D

Nott is really being adorable with the “we are a team and you are important” thing. Obvious, but adorable.

Taliesin wanted ghost stories and now we’re getting islands people avoid because strange ancient unnatural stuff

Okay quick aside but this conversation with Yasha and Caduceus makes me think — I love how there’s this group of people who seemingly should have nothing in common, but in a lot of ways they have things they can understand about each other. Struggles they can related to. It’s really nice.

Jester and her multiple message spells lol

I’ll miss you Marion!

Oooo a glow in the water?

Awww Matt that’s really pretty!

“Sometimes the things that are the most beautiful are the things that can hurt you the worst” that’s very profound, Jester.

I’m gonna cry I don’t want Jester to be sad don’t be sad (Laura needs to stop looking like she’s gonna cry because it’s gonna make me cry)

And the way she does this little laugh like she’s trying to brush off how sad she is like STOP IT IM EMOTIONAL.

Marion was gonna leave with Jester’s dad but then he didn’t come back and I’m thinking at some point they had better kick the Gentleman’s ass for abandoning her

The way Fjord is so sweet and soft with Jester is so cute I can’t decide if I ship them or if I just want them to be soft and close but not romantic I think I’d be happy either way but my god Fjord’s being so gentle with her is killing me

“There are vegetarian options as well”

Marius: “Thank you, thank you, it’s very good—they’re crazy aren’t they?”

Cad: “Oh yeah, they’re completely crazy.”

I desperately hope they get attacked by a sea monster at some point

“Captain Tusktooth”

Tiny elf-owl Frumpkin omg

He’s loaning her tiny owl Frumpkin for a week I cry

M: “I poke him to see if he bites me”

Tr: “He’s dead”

“I’m gonna probably start talking to fish at some point in the near future” Caduceus Doolittle

When Nott is sincere like when she’s talking to Caduceus right now is so sweet

I take it back it’s too soon to talk about Molly Sam

“Between you and me, Jester’s a really bad cleric, so…” and Laura almost spits out her drink lol

I want to meet the rest of the Clays someday I hope some of them are still alive

“A sign that there could be, for all of us, another chapter” Nott is getting me in my feelings tonight

Matt: “You get the sense that the fish would be happy to”

Cad/Tal: “I’m a lunatic aren’t I?”

M: “Yeah.”

C/T: “I’m sorry.”

M: “Yeah, no, it’s great! :D”

The fish: “sure, sure, suresuresuresure sure”

Oh godddd sky monster?

Bird?

WHAT IS IT

“Professor Thadeus…?”

Oh. Fuck. Creepy flying humanoid thing.

lol Beau making sure it’s not Yasha

Oh jeez poor Yasha

…Okay Matt that wasn’t cool because it’s past midnight and the windows are open and I’m feeling weirdly paranoid now

HERE WE GO

Harpies omggggg

Caleb’s really not gonna be able to use fire for this without risking the ship

Oh fuck don’t get the deck hands

Okay the sail isn’t that big a deal Jester can probably mend it, so save the deck hand first

Harpies are not sirens that shouldn’t be allowed to do anything

Oh poor Nott

SAVE THE CREW PERSON FIRST BEAU

I love Cad’s beetles

“Snack time” Cad you’re so creepy sometimes xD

15pts of beetle damage hell yeah

Okay I take it back Beau might have done the best thing saving the sail.

Okay this is too easy of a fight tho what’s coming that’s worse

Oh daaaaamn snapped her neck with the sail rope

Caleb Nott this isn’t nice xD

“We saved his life with the power of friendship” I’m crying

F: “How do we prevent further heart episodes?”

N: “MORE FRIENDSHP. MORE FRIENDSHIP.”

Awkward friend hugs are best hugs

Nott please don’t eat harpy meat

Cad’s gonna compost the harpy

Beau is keeping Frumpkin in her pocket of course she is

Poor Travis just like “I DIDN’T KNOW ID ACTUALLY HAVE TO KNOW HOW TO CAPTAIN A SHIP” poor guy

Oh god the ship is gonna sink

They’re gonna end up stranded on the cursed island just watch

Gonna try and block the hole…. with a mattress

I’m shocked they managed to patch it bless Galen for that Nat20

Caleb being clever to save the ship with his magic bubble

I hope they don’t get Orli killed

They gonna get sunk

Oh wait

Does Caleb have to stay inside the bubble?? I hope it doesn’t start to fill too much

YAAAAAS what a good episode!

SO MUCH SAILING PIRATE-Y FUN

Oh please wear pirate outfits I’m begging

I’m so excited for next week