#[ no. it's presence in absence. the importance lays in the fact that it isn't there. that she doesn't have it. ]

[iniziare]

Kafka crossed my thoughts tonight at random, and so I wanted to re-post a little something here, with some minor edits thrown in. I just think it's often overlooked how... many human elements they've tied into her. A hungering sense of curiosity, the inherent sense of longing that clings to her being like a fever, and how she's caught (very humanly so) between the belief of we are tied to fate and thus it shall be, and the insistence on choice and how the Trailblazer seems to be inherently representative of its existence. And then I think of what being 'human' entails, and one could argue that it represents the experience of life, before one's end by the hand of destiny/fate. Is that... why she's so enthralled by all these human concepts? Because she's so firmly tied to fate? Yes, I still linger in the thought that she bears strong connections to fate, there are too many hints at the Moirai to me to ignore. But it's not even that, it's her Spirit Whisper, it's that her wanted poster made by the Devils that she used to hunt on her home of Pteruges-V, had to describe the ability and what it does— which tells ms that it's not native to there. But— I'm getting sidetracked, this isn't about any kind of potential nature that is far from humanity, it's about the evidence, even if she may turn out not to be inherently human at some point in the future of HSR, that she is drawn to, portrays and in some form, lives, very human concepts. And one of the ways I tried to make that clear before, was by talking about her in relation to her violin— or more specifically: the presence of its absence, the latter being which I will always firmly believe to be the eternal overarching narrative of Kafka's character. Any way, onto the babble:

I'll forever remember looking into the notes of someone's playthrough of HSR's first scenes, which is just something I like to do because you never know what kind of little treasures you might find. And there was a violinist tucked away in there, who I'd also seen in the notes of her main trailer, commenting on the intense accuracy of the movement of her fingers. And then on top of that, how they've usually been let down by the details when other games have tried to simulate it as well, but it was more so done to iterate how intentional this must've been for Hoyo to have focused on its accuracy so much.

So in that sense, I think it's close to a given that she knows how to play it, similarly to how I believe that she is someone who also plays or has played the piano. Where I differ however, is that I don't believe that she actually owns a violin at present, nor is she seeking to obtain one by her own means. Moreover, what and where I think the 'mimicking' comes from, actually, is from her memories and the emotional attachment that she once held for these instruments in them. Kafka's character, to me, revolves around and thrives within two concepts, that of intimate longing and that of loss (the pearl earring, the broken winged butterfly pin, and Blade's character story to name some) which plays intricately into the former. Now for me, her connection to the violin and the piano (primarily the former) play wonderfully into representing both of these, and thus can be drawn into these prevalent topics across the board for her incredibly easily. In simple terms, I think that there is a sense of longing to play them. Now, I feel confident in noting that Kafka does not come across as one who, if she had access to (in this case) a violin of her own, that she would crave to play it so intensely all the time, that when drawn from it for even the briefest of time, that she would enact the part of playing one during her separation from it. No, I think she's actively choosing not to obtain one, for one reason or another. Perhaps it's a memory that plays into the loss that her character seems to stray towards, or perhaps it's a lack of something else; I don't quite yet dare say. But there's something oddly wistful about it, if you look past the surface. All in all, I think her little moments of mimicking and humming, makes for an incredibly interesting "little" tidbit to me. It reminds me of something I wrote in an older post last year:

(...) And yet, and yet, I actively think if she were to find herself in a hotel room, even on her own, and there would be a piano right there— I can see her fingers tracing over the keys so very clearly, even as if she were touching the keys to play and yet she would never press down.

I still stand by this to this day. It's the ache to do something again, and yet for one reason or another, you can't bring yourself to do it. Whether it feels wrong, or there's something missing, something or someone; it doesn't matter, it's a longing of some kind. It really is the overarching topic and/or concept that I see in her character, and the fact that she's tied to such an inherently fragile instrument, only further solidifies it in my brain. But in that, I also feel a deep sense of melancholy when I think of her and that violin. And it plays into all of this, of course, but also the fact that I genuinely see no evidence in canon at present that tells me that she has one, and we know she could obtain one if she so wanted to,but she doesn't. Which tells me, on some level, that she doesn't want one. Which then has me entertain the concept of... if one were gifted to her, would that be different? Would that offer the person who gifted it to her a glimpse that no one else could ever get? The answer is a very likely yes, but I can't see it being gifted by most by any means; it'd need to be by someone who could come to grasp the significance of one, put in the appropriate research, who would know where to go, who to speak to, where to find the significance. And that, isn't most people.

[vanteguccir]

── ୨୧ !　𝗕𝗜𝗥𝗧𝗛𝗗𝗔𝗬 𝗕𝗢𝗬

　　　　　　　　𝒄𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader

SUMMARY: When Chris is starting to come to terms with the horrible idea that he will have to spend his birthday away from Y/N, a surprise takes him, literally, by surprise.

WARNING: Making-out.

REQUESTED?: No.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism, copy, or "inspiration"! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

A/N²: A small story only to warm up for their birthday! I'm going to post more tomorrow 🩷

　　　༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

The day before the triplets' 21st birthday in Boston was marked by a mix of nostalgia and melancholy for Chris. Despite the bustling energy of their family home, Chris couldn't shake off the heavy feeling of absence. Matt and Nick seemed to be in higher spirits, enjoying their time back home, but Chris felt an emptiness that gnawed at him relentlessly.

Chris had always been too close to Y/N, his girlfriend, who had remained in LA due to her college classes. And as he sat in the living room, watching his family laugh and share stories, Chris couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sadness. He missed Y/N's laughter, her presence, the way she made every moment brighter.

The fact that she couldn’t be there for such a significant milestone made him feel both sad and angry, though he knew it wasn’t her fault. College was important, and he respected her dedication to her studies.

The house was filled with the comforting smells of home-cooked meals and the familiar sounds of family. Chris held his phone in his hand, scrolling through old pictures of him and Y/N, trying to fill the void with memories of their time together.

His thumb paused on a picture Nick took of them at American Ninja Warrior, both of them grinning widely at the camera. It had been taken just a few weeks ago, during their filming. He could almost hear her laugh, see the way her eyes sparkled in the neons light. The longing in his heart intensified, making him feel even more isolated despite being surrounded by his loved ones.

Mary Lou noticed her son's downcast demeanor very quickly, and as soon as she got a little space, she went to sit beside him.

"Chris, honey, what's wrong? You’ve been so quiet all day." She said, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, caressing the area.

Chris sighed, leaning into his mother's comforting touch.

"I just miss Y/N, Mom. I know she has classes and all, but it feels wrong to be celebrating without her." He tried to smile, lowering his eyes.

"I understand, sweetheart." Mary Lou gave him a sympathetic smile. "But remember, she’s always with you in spirit. And you’ll see her soon enough. Try to enjoy this time with your family. It’s been so long since we were all together like this."

He nodded, appreciating her words but still feeling the weight of Y/N’s absence. He knew he should be more present, more engaged with his family, and the guilt of not doing that weighted above him, but his thoughts kept drifting back to LA, to the love of his life.

That night, Chris lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. The house was quiet now, everyone else had gone to sleep, tired from the day's activities. He picked up his phone again, contemplating sending Y/N another message. They had exchanged texts throughout the day, but he didn’t want to seem too needy or make her feel guilty for not being there.

Instead, he decided to call her. The phone rang a few times before she picked up, her voice soft and sleepy.

"Hey, honey." She murmured. "Is everything okay?"

Hearing her voice brought a rush of comfort and a pang of sorrow to Chris, a smile taking over his features automatically.

"Hi, babe. Yeah, everything’s fine. I just... I miss you. I wish you were here." His voice sounded soft and lower than usual.

"Oh, babe, I miss you too." She said, and he could hear the sincerity in her voice. "I wish I could be there, Chris. I really do. But I promise, we’ll celebrate when you get back, okay?"

Chris sighed, closing his eyes for a few seconds before reopening them, looking at her contact name glowing on the small screen.

"I know. I just... It’s hard, you know? Being here without you. It doesn't feel right."

"I know, babe. But you’re surrounded by family, and they love you. Try to have a good time, for them. And for me." He almost could listen her sweet smile across the phone.

He nodded, even though she couldn’t see him, breathing deeply.

"I’ll try. I just can’t wait to see you."

"Me too. Get some rest, pretty boy. Tomorrow's a big day. I love you." She whispered softly, the sound of sheets moving around echoing in the background.

"I love you too, Y/N. Goodnight." He muttered quietly, biting his bottom lip slightly.

As he hung up the phone, Chris felt a mixture of emotions. He tried to focus on the next day as he drifted off to sleep, dreaming of the day he’d be back in Y/N’s arms.

Unbeknownst to Chris, Y/N had been planning something special. She had spent the last few weeks organizing a surprise that she hoped would make up for her absence. She knew how much this milestone meant to him and his brothers, and she wanted to be a part of it in any way she could.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

The morning of the triplets' birthday dawned crisp and clear in Boston. Mary Lou was already in the kitchen, bustling about as she prepared a grand breakfast. The aroma of sizzling bacon, freshly baked muffins, and brewing coffee filled the house, a warm and welcoming scent that promised a day full of celebration.

Jimmy and Justin had gone to the grocery store to pick up some last-minute items needed for the big birthday lunch they were planning. The house was alive with activity, everyone playing their part in making this day special.

Matt and Nick had left early, driving to the airport to pick up Y/N. They had been in on the surprise from the start, eager to help bring a genuine smile to Chris's face. The drive was filled with excitement and a few playful jabs at how Chris would react, trying to imagine his expression when he saw Y/N in their home. Y/N herself was a bundle of nerves and anticipation, her heart racing at the thought of surprising Chris. She had barely slept after their call, her mind buzzing with plans and excitement.

As Matt and Nick’s car pulled up to the curb at the airport, Y/N spotted them and waved excitedly, a big smile on her face. They greeted her with warm hugs and excited chatter, filling her in on the plans for the day.

The drive back to the house was filled with lively conversation, Y/N asking about every little detail of their plan, wanting everything to be perfect. Matt and Nick reassured her that everything was set and that their parents were in on the surprise, ready to welcome her with open arms.

As they drove through the streets of Boston, Y/N suddenly remembered something.

"Hey, Matt? Can we stop by a flower shop?" She asked, a hint of urgency in her voice while her eyes kept watching the landscape moving quickly through the window. "I want to get something special for Chris."

Matt and Nick exchanged a glance, then nodded.

"Sure, we can do that." Matt said, turning the car toward the nearest florist he knew all too well from the times his father used to bring them there to buy some flowers for Mary Lou.

The flower shop was a charming little place filled with the vibrant colors and sweet scents of countless blooms. Y/N spent a few minutes selecting the perfect bouquet, a beautiful arrangement of Chris's favorite flowers. She wanted it to be just right, a small token of her love and the effort she put into making his day special.

When they finally pulled back into the driveway, Y/N's heart felt like it might burst from her chest. She took a deep breath, clutching the bouquet tightly, and followed Matt and Nick into the house.

Mary Lou greeted her with a warm hug, kissing her face with excitement and whispering words of encouragement. They placed her surprises in the living room, the bouquet taking center stage among the carefully wrapped gifts.

Y/N took a deep breath, looking at the family for a last time before climbing the stairs slowly, each step heightening her anticipation.

Chris's door was slightly ajar, and she peeked in to see him still asleep, his form cocooned under the heavy blankets. She slipped into the room quietly, closing the door softly behind her. The morning light filtered through the curtains, casting a gentle glow on Chris's peaceful face.

Y/N approached the bed, her movements slow and deliberate. She carefully lay down beside him, positioning herself so she could watch him without disturbing his sleep. For a long moment, she just observed him, taking in every detail. His dark hair was tousled, and there was a softness to his features that only appeared when he was at rest. She felt a swell of affection as she noted the faint smile on his lips, wondering if he was dreaming of something pleasant.

The room was quiet except for the rhythmic sound of his breathing. Y/N reached out, her fingers barely brushing his cheek before she drew them back, not wanting to wake him too abruptly. She could feel the warmth radiating from his body, a comforting presence that she had missed so much. Her heart ached with a mix of love and longing, overwhelmed by the sight of him so close yet so unaware of her presence.

After what felt like an eternity, Y/N leaned in closer, her lips hovering near his ear.

"Chris." She whispered softly, her voice barely more than a breath. "Wake up, pretty boy."

Chris stirred slightly but didn't open his eyes, better accommodating his position.

"Five more minutes, babe." He mumbled, his voice thick with sleep. There was a pause, and then his eyes snapped open. "Wait, babe?" He lifted his head from the pillow, and when he saw Y/N lying beside him, his eyes widened in shock, his body sitting up abruptly. "Y/N?"

She smiled, tears of happiness welling in her eyes, sitting up to be on the same level as him.

"Happy birthday, Chris." She said, her voice filled with warmth and love.

Chris blinked a few times as if trying to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Then, a broad smile spread across his face, and he pulled her into a tight embrace.

"Baby, oh my God! I can't believe you're here!" He exclaimed, his voice a mix of joy and disbelief.

"I wouldn't miss your birthday for anything." She replied, hugging him back just as tightly. "I wanted to surprise you."

Chris pulled back slightly, looking at her with a mixture of awe and adoration.

"This is the best birthday present ever." He said, his eyes shining with happiness. "I was so sad you couldn't be here, and now... you're really here."

Y/N laughed softly, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead.

"I'm here, Chris. I'm really here, and I'm not going anywhere else." She whispered, her thumb caressing his forehead softly, traveling to his brows and cheek bones. "Okay?"

"I've missed you so much." He muttered, his hands snaking up her shoulders to her face, cupping her cheeks, his fingers threading into her hair, and finally brought his lips crashing down onto hers in a hard, heated kiss. The intensity of it took her breath away, her knees going weak as she clung to him for support, her hands lowering to his jaw.

Chris kissed her with a desperation that spoke of all the days they had been apart, his lips moving against hers with a raw, unrestrained passion. His hands moved to her waist, gripping her tightly as he pulled her onto his lap, settling her straddling him. The closeness sent a shiver down her spine, and she could feel the rapid thud of his heart against her chest, mirroring her own.

Y/N's hands tangled in his hair, tugging gently as she kissed him back with equal fervor. The kiss deepened, their tongues meeting in a heated dance that left them both gasping for air. Chris's hands roamed over her back, pulling her closer as if trying to erase the distance that had been between them. He groaned softly against her lips, a sound that sent a rush of warmth through her.

Y/N could feel the world spinning around her, her senses overwhelmed by Chris's touch, his taste, his scent. His hands were everywhere, touching, caressing, exploring, and killing all the bad feelings he felt away from her.

When they finally broke apart, gasping for air, Chris buried his head in the crook of her neck, his breathing ragged hitting against her skin.

"I love you so much, babe." He whispered against her skin, his voice thick with emotion. "You have no idea how much I've missed you. This is the best gift I could ever ask for."

Y/N's heart swelled with love and tenderness as she held him close, feeling his vulnerability and happiness. She could feel his tears wetting her skin, and she gently stroked his back, comforting him.

"Oh, honey, don't cry." She whispered, her voice soft while her hands traveled to his hair, massaging his curls. "I love you. So much."

They stayed like that for a long moment, wrapped up in each other, their hearts beating in sync. Eventually, they pulled apart, and Chris took a deep breath, his heart feeling lighter than it had in days.

"Come on." He said, his voice switching to one full of excitement. "Let's go downstairs, I can smell breakfast from here."

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(If you want to be added to the taglist, go to this post)

[anextraordinarymuse]

Head vs Heart: Part 2

Part 1 can be found here.

(@jonesgirl88 GET SOME WATER KATIE

STAY HYDRATED FOR THIS MARATHON)

Okay so we left off on part one talking about the end of The Treasure Box. We already discussed the moments when Oliver and Shane are locked in the vault, and now we're on to the moments after that. I mentioned that when Holly's letter falls out of Oliver's pocket Shane is the one to bring it back to him. Funny how Oliver hasn't tried to address his wife's absence in years, but as soon as Shane shows up she either encourages him or pushes him toward a resolution. In more ways than one, Shane is Oliver's catalyst. You mentioned the blizzard theory, Katie, and I totally agree with that. Shane showed up and is literally guiding or pushing Oliver down off that frozen mountain by turns.

Anyway, look at this: even after Shane has returned Holly's letter to Oliver, she exits the vault by passing Oliver on his left side, which you can kind of see here (again, this gif is from the Alameda and Downing blog):

And I didn't gif it, but when Oliver and Shane are reunited with Norman and Rita in the bank lobby, Shane is on his left. Now, something I found interesting is that when Oliver and Shane deliver the letters to the living Jonathan, Shane is seated to Oliver's right. Considering that Oliver gives something away in this moment by telling Jonathan to read the love letters out loud, with his wife (the way that he and Shane did), and the way Shane reacts to his saying it, I find it interesting that she's not on Oliver's left side. But, he is leaning toward Shane with his left hand pointed at her (and he's tapping the fingers of his left hand against the chair).

But then we get to the pageant, where Shane is once again seated to Oliver's left. But that's not the big takeaway in this sequence. This is:

If memory serves, this is the first time we see Shane take Oliver's hand like this - and it's his left hand. They're not dancing, and considering what they've been through recently, it's really not even that intense of a moment. She just does it by instinct because that connection has already been established. At this point, I'm making the case for the left side of Oliver's body (and, by extension, his heart) being Shane's side. That's her territory; Oliver has given it to her, perhaps unwittingly at first, and she's claimed it. Also, both times we've seen Oliver draw Shane's hand into the space over his heart he's been holding her hand in his left hand. Just a note. We don't see a lot of this physical or physically present connection in A Hope and A Future except in this small, blink-and-you-miss-it moment (that I absolutely adore anyway!):

Look at all of those points of connection. Not only is Shane's head on Oliver's left shoulder, his left cheek is almost pressed into her hair, and her hand is almost resting on his left arm. Also, once again, Shane is turned into Oliver (whose body is facing straight forward despite his head being turned in Shane's direction). Did I mention that I love this moment? Don't think about the fact that Shane is literally laying there listening to the sound of Oliver's heartbeat, because then you'll get all mushy like me and this will devolve into a feels fest because isn't that just the sweetest, most tender thi ... okay, getting back on track.

Anyway. This propensity for Shane to connect with the area directly over or around Oliver's heart is well established at this point, I think, even if it's been rather subtle until this point. I say until this point because once that hand hold is established at the end of The Treasure Box, Shane claiming (if you will) that area becomes more blatant - especially in times of vulnerability.

Let's look at the Christmas movie. Now, I love that this is the first time we get to see Oliver jealous. Another man is on the scene, and he gets a decent amount of Shane's attention in moments where Oliver is present to witness that. We get to see pretty early on that Oliver really isn't a fan of that, and that's never more apparent than at the Christmas ball when Shane not only dances with Jordan, but teaches him steps to the dance that, until now, has been strictly Oliver and Shane's. But that's not really what I want to talk about

It's the moments after Oliver delivers Shane's letters that reveal more of this Shane = Oliver's heart connection. Also worth noting at this point, however, is that this is when I also started to pick up on some interesting left-sided details on Shane's behalf. Let's take a look.

Oliver has just delivered some very emotional news that Shane may have finally been ready to receive, but still definitely shook her to her core. When Oliver reaches for her, what side of her dress does he rip? Her left sleeve. Almost like he's (accidentally) ripping the band-aid off her wounded heart and exposing the injury in order to administer first aid. This is really the first big moment of anything left-oriented on Shane's behalf. She's usually the all-in type, as indicated in previous gifs by the fact that she's often turned to face Oliver head on in important moments. But I make the case that the gravity of this moment is supported by the fact that Oliver reaches for her left side, and connects in a way that he wasn't expecting - that neither of them were. And now that he has her attention, they share another foundational moment, which is followed by this:

... Shane once again leaving her imprint on Oliver's heart. This moment of connection has now visibly gone both ways. The love and concern and tenderness that passes between Oliver and Shane in this moment is ... undeniable. Oliver has sought to soothe that hurt in Shane's heart by once again offering something of himself - and offering it to Shane in the only way he can at this moment - and Shane is reaffirming both their connection and her place by once again engaging with the left side of Oliver's body, directly over his heart. Actually she claims everything from the middle of his chest to his shoulder, lol. She's staking an even bigger claim than before and she does so after Oliver expresses that he has failed to find someone to share his life with until this point. Coincidence? No way.

And now we get to From Paris With Love. The only actual, visible comparisons we get to the way Oliver interacts with Holly vs how he interacts with Shane. And oh boy, there's some interesting stuff here.

Another thing I didn't gif but is worth mentioning in this movie are the ways that each women understands Oliver, and how they connect with him in moments when he isn't there. When Holly first arrives in the DLO she's alone, and we see her interacting with specific objects that belong to Oliver. What she chooses is interesting. The first thing she picks is Oliver's hat, which is arguably the only thing that belongs solely to and represents only Oliver. But even then, we know that Oliver's hat is outdated: we haven't seen him wear it since the pilot. Holly seems to recognize it, though, which makes me think that Oliver probably wore it at least somewhat regularly in the past. So, Holly is visually connecting with a past Oliver and not the man we know. Holly then interacts with two things that belong to Oliver, but are more about Holly then Oliver: the postage stamp tin which Holly had engraved and gave him, and the small statue of the Eiffel tower. These things don't really connect to Oliver as a person - they connect to Holly and her presence in his life. We're meant to see that Holly isn't really connecting with him, she's connecting with the parts of her (and him) that she's left behind. The only other thing that Holly interacts with that can be considered distinctly Oliver is the Yoo-Hoo that she takes without asking - and then leaves mostly untouched on the desk when she leaves. Every moment that Holly spends in the DLO is about disconnection and abandonment - memories and echoes. Very little establishes her as a part of the present (or future) - and she pointedly does not encroach on Shane's territory (which Shane neither notices or witnesses). Check it out:

In the first moment that Oliver sees Holly, he does so in the context of Shane's presence. Not only that, but look at how Shane and Holly are standing: Shane is off to Oliver's left and Holly literally steps out from Shane's shadow - I mean, steps out from behind her and is oriented more to Oliver's middle/right. Now, it's natural for Shane to be physically present around the left side of Oliver's body, and we see this again as Shane leaves. She follows what is basically her natural course and passes him on his left in a smooth motion (despite the awkwardness she feels):

And Oliver is still looking at Holly, but he turns his body toward Shane as she passes (exposing more of his left side to her as she goes while also accommodating her presence and departure). Now, we're going to talk about how Holly chooses to leave in just a second. There's something else I want to talk about in the scene where Shane and Holly meet. Remember how I said that we start to see more left-oriented visual cues from Shane? This is one of those moments. This is Shane when she returns to the DLO:

Now, totally disregarding that I think this sequence of scenes is one of the moments when Shane looks the most beautiful (seriously, I don't know what it is, but she looks stunning), the way that Shane is wearing her hair caught my eye. She doesn't usually tuck her hair behind her ears, and in these moments she only has one side tucked: the left. Her left ear and shoulder are exposed, whereas her right ear and shoulder are "hidden" or "protected" by the veil of her hair. Shane's heart is vulnerable and exposed in these moments with Holly, and whether she knows it or not Holly lands several blows. Not only is Holly's presence a blow to Shane and her place in Oliver's life (and heart), Holly then goes on to show that she does know Oliver - and that she knows him in ways that Shane doesn't, and might never get to at this point. It's not just the revelation of Oliver's habit of eating clams and red wine when he's angry, it's also the secret-sharing of the fact that apparently Oliver is such a good kisser that Holly had to stop kissing him altogether in order to follow through on her promises to herself. Shane's vulnerability and heartache in these moments isn't just visible in her expression. The fact that only the left side of her hair is tucked is meant to show us that she's vulnerable and exposed, and she stays like that (and so does her hair) for the entirety of this exchange.

Here's another one from a few moments later that gives you a better look. (Another side note: SHANE IS FREAKING SUNSHINE. LOOK AT HER. SHE'S BEAUTIFUL AND GLOWING AND HER HAIR IS LIQUID GOLD. If you don't love Shane McInerney then I literally can't even).

Now, for the moment Holly leaves the DLO. I've already mentioned how smoothly Shane exited and that she followed a natural path past Oliver. That's not how Holly leaves.

oFirst things first: Holly chooses to pass Oliver on his right as she leaves. But there's also no natural flow here since Holly wasn't moving before this, so her departure looks more abrupt. And Oliver doesn't move at all as she leaves: he doesn't turn toward her at all or accommodate/allow for her to pass. In fact, he looks frozen. Holly seems to have a natural propensity for either angering Oliver, or making him freeze.

Notably, Holly and Oliver barely touch. Not just in this moment, but at all in this moment. The only time they do seem to touch is when they're dancing, which I will talk about in a minute.

Despite Holly's arrival and presence, the symbolism of Shane on Oliver's left and being synonymous with his heart doesn't let up.

But, since I've once again hit the limit of ten gifs per post (oops? Is this getting out of hand? Oh well.) we're moving on to part 3.

[smileyoongle]

MASTERPIECE (A Yandere Park Jimin AU)

So basically this is where everything really starts. I swear, the ending that I have planned for this is mind boggling. I'm still surprised with the plot that I've planned. But I can't exactly just jump to the end so let's take it slow.

Summary: You thought it was just a painting until you bought it. You thought the man in the frame was beautiful until you saw him. You thought it was a masterpiece until you were ruined.

Pairing: Yandere! Jimin×Reader, Taehyung×Reader

Warnings: Contains mentions of smut, deaths, blood, obsessive behaviour and mental health issues. Please read at your own risk.

You wiped your forehead and stepped down from the stool, a sigh of pride escaping your lips as you stared at the painting that was now hanging on your bedroom wall. It was sad that you had to take down the previous Helen Frankenthaler piece. But it's time was up. And no painting had made you so fascinated before. 

"Did you take down that nursery school painting?" A voice invaded your ears, your lips stretching into a smile as you turned to the source of the sweet voice. 

"Took you long enough to find me." You teased, opening your arms and hugging the older woman who had just entered your room. She chuckled and patted your back before ruffling your hair, her faint wrinkles making themselves visible as she smiled. You grinned at the mother-like lady who stood in front of you, who you lovingly called Nan. Since you moved into this house and away from your family, she had taken great care of you. She was originally the caretaker of the house and lived in a cottage nearby. But after you moved in, something clicked. Maybe it was because of the lack of affection from your mother and the absence of a daughter in Nan's life. In just a couple months, she was giving you the love that your family never gave you and you were beyond grateful for it.

"Says the girl who spent her entire day outside. And that too without eating any breakfast." She complained, giving you a playful glare. You shook your head and held her hand, pulling her in front of the new addition that you had made to your room.

"You can complain about it later but right now, I want you to tell me how you feel about this." You stated, nudging your head towards the painting. 

Nan raised her eyebrows and you could tell that she was impressed. Now that was even more surprising. Nan literally didn't care about any of your paintings. Mostly, because she didn't see what you saw in them. 

"Seems like you do have good taste, darling. He's a beauty." She said, staring at the painting for a second longer. You hummed in response and fixed your gaze at the swirls of paint on the canvas. You had to admit, even though the painting looked messy, it managed to look elegant. It was probably because of how good looking Park Jimin was but you had also seen your fair share of handsome men. Taehyung being one of them. And that's how you knew it wasn't just the pretty face, something about it was mysterious. You just didn't know what to assume. From the delicate frame to the faint patters of red that tainted the bottom of the canvas, you felt attracted to every inch of it. There was a story behind it. And you really wanted to know.

You gasped when you felt a slap on your shoulder, your eyes widening as you turned to Nan who was looking at you with narrowed eyes.

"Even though I know this is just a painting, let me just say that I won't approve if you fell for an imaginary man. And especially when you have an entire Kim Taehyung ready to sweep you off your feet." You rolled your eyes at her dramatic description. Sometimes, you swore that Nan was secretly running a fanclub for your and Taehyung's relationship. Even though she knew that you would never date him, she still tried. And you couldn't exactly blame her either, Taehyung was too charming.

"I won't fall for that man but I am definitely in love with that masterpiece." You said, walking out of your room and down the stairs. You heard her footsteps behind you as you entered the kitchen, your hand immediately going to the unopened bottle of merlot that rested on the table. 

"Too much isn't good for you." Nan stated in disapproval but you just shrugged, grabbing a wine glass to pour your treat for the night. 

You saw Nan shaking her head in your peripheral vision as you took the first sip of your red velvety liquid.

"Oh and your father called. He was asking if you were gonna go visit during Christmas." 

Your jaw immediately clenched, the red wine suddenly tasting bitter to you.

"What did you say?" You asked calmly. You didn't wanna lash out on Nan, she did nothing but worry about you.

But you couldn't say the same for your family.

Nan could sense the anger radiating off of you. She knew better than to mention your family but it was important in order to break your walls.

"I told them I'll talk to you about it." She answered, looking at you with concern filled eyes. 

You glanced at her, your fingers clenching around the glass in your hand. If you applied a little more pressure, it would surely break.

Nan opened her mouth to say something but you stopped her.

"I feel good today, Nan. It's probably the first time in months, so how about we just drop this and order pizza. I'm starving." You gave her a tight smile, breathing deeply to calm yourself down. 

Nan nodded in understanding, tucking a strand of gray hair behind her ear as she smiled at you. In all her years living with you, Nan knew that it was important for you to be happy. Your happiness meant that you were getting better and your therapy sessions were getting shorter. It really broke her heart to watch you get lost in your own thoughts. Bad thoughts, to be precise.

All because of something that happened years ago.

You headed upstairs in search of your phone, tipping your head back to gulp down all the liquid in your glass. The floor where your bedroom was located, was eerily dark and quiet. But what else could you expect? It was only you and Nan in the house. 

Even though you should have been used to it by now, you couldn't help but shiver. It was weird.

You switched on the lights in your room, skipping towards your bed where your phone lay. You plopped down on the soft mattress and grabbed your phone, dialing in your favourite pizza place's number. 

You inhaled deeply as the phone rang, signalling that your call was going through. And as soon as the receiver picked up, you felt it.

Hot breath fanning the back of your neck, shallow sounds of someone's breathing filling your ear. Your heart stopped, your body feeling the presence of another being right behind you. It was too real to be just your mind playing tricks.

It could be Nan.

"Y/N, I'm going to the cottage for a minute. I'll be back." 

Your eyes widened when you heard her voice from downstairs, followed by the slamming of a door. 

It wasn't her.

"Hello? Ma'am, are you there?" The pizza person asked, his voice growing bored with the lack of response. Goosebumps rose on your skin when a low hiss came from behind you. There was definitely someone standing there. You clenched your fingers around your phone, bringing it away from your ear as you gulped. Your heart was pounding so hard that you thought it was gonna jump out of your chest. 

With a shaky breath, you slowly turned around, your eyes closing in fear of seeing something you didn't wanna see. Another gush of air fanned your face, your eyes shooting open only to meet his.

Brown eyes stared into yours with as much stillness as a rock possessed. You placed a hand on your chest and sighed loudly.

"Fucking hell." You cursed, glancing at the painting that had startled you. You shook your head and laughed at yourself. There was nobody. It was just your mind. Or the fact you had merlot running through your veins. 

You narrowed your eyes and held your empty wine glass, bringing it closer to your face. You tilted your head as if to examine it. As if there was something wrong with it.

"I haven't even had too much yet." You mumbled before letting out a frustrated hiss and standing up from your bed. You grabbed your phone again, dialing the pizza place's number again as you exited the room. You definitely needed a break.

___________________________________________

The noise from the TV fell deaf to your ears as you slept on the couch. The empty pizza boxes were scattered around the huge living room, an empty bottle of merlot sitting just below the couch. Your mouth was slightly parted and your hair was all over your face. Nan had already left for the night, the comfort of her own cottage inviting her back home. It was 3AM when the soft footsteps echoed through the staircase, the TV screen suddenly going black. Your chest rose and fell rhythmically, your peaceful state making him more and more curious. 

Fingers trailed over your cheek, brushing away some of your hair from your face. You unconsciously shivered and whined, turning away to lay on your side with your cheek pressed against the soft material of the couch. A low chuckle made you frown in your sleepy state. You were awake only for a second before your body screamed at you to just ignore it and go back to sleep. And so you did. 

Nothing woke you up after that. Not even the feeling of his breath on your face. Not even the feeling of his lips next to your ears. Not even his voice. 

"Such a pretty little thing. I can't wait to ruin you."

____________________________________________

"Y/N, wake up! You have an appointment today." 

You groaned and covered your face, whining as the covers were pulled off of you. You flailed your hands in an attempt to grab them again but Nan knew you. And she had already tossed the blanket on the floor. 

"Sleepy head, wake up. We're gonna be late. I told you not to drink that entire bottle. I might have to take Taehyung up on his offer of banning the winery from sending you more." Her voice caused your head to throb. You winced and held your head, shoving your face into your pillow. 

Pillow…

Blanket... 

Realisation hit you like a huge tsunami, your eyes shooting open as you jolted awake. You frantically looked around, scoffing in disbelief as your bedroom came into view.

What the fuck?

Nan frowned and stared at you with concern, her hands halting their movements immediately.

"Are you alright?" She asked, placing a hand on your shoulder. You blinked twice and ran your fingers through your hair. 

"Did-did I sleep here?" You asked, glancing at Nan whose eyes were still fixed on you. She nodded in confusion, not understanding the cause of your dilemma at all.

"You were sleeping here when I came in. Why? Something wrong?" She enquired, narrowing her eyes at you. You clenched your eyes shut and hissed, falling back into the soft sheets.

"I don't remember sleeping here... I'm probably just hungover." You stated, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. You heard Nan tsk in disapproval. 

You obviously lied. You had been drinking for years now and you definitely knew when you were hungover. You clearly recalled falling asleep on the couch. So how did you end up here? 

"I don't know about you but I'm definitely telling Dr Kim about your little drinking sessions." Said a voice from the doorway. Once again, you sat up in bed with immediate effect. Your eyes meeting his beautiful brown ones, his lips stretching into a fond smile as you frowned at him.

"What are you doing here?" You asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

Taehyung shrugged and plopped down on your bed, waving fondly at Nan as he turned his attention back to you.

"I took a day off. Work's getting overwhelming." He replied nonchalantly. His fingers picked at your silk sheets, a habit of his whenever he was lying. You narrowed your eyes at him and crossed your arms.

Your glare made him roll his eyes as he raised his hands in defence.

"Fine. I was worried about you and Nan called me just in case you decide to cancel your appointment like last week." 

Your eyes turned to Nan for an explanation. But she seemed unaffected by your gaze. She was pretty used to it. At her lack of response, you sighed and looked at Taehyung.

"Why were you worried? And also, I cancelled my appointment last week because I don't think I need therapy anymore. I'm completely okay now." You said, gesturing to yourself. Taehyung and Nan glanced at each other before looking at you with pursed lips. You gave them a confused look, raising your eyebrows in question. 

Taehyung cleared his throat and sat up, shifting closer to you and tucking your hair behind your ear. You leaned into his touch, unknowingly. His warm hands providing you relief from your headache. He smiled softly, caressing your cheek before leaning forward.

"You called me last night, my love." He stated, tilting his head and looking at you with worrisome eyes. You frowned and shook your head.

"No I didn't…"

"I have the call log. You called me at around 3 in the morning." He interrupted you, making you shake your head even more furiously. Noticing your panic, Taehyung cupped your cheeks and hushed you.

"What did I say?" You questioned, your heart pounding in fear of an answer you didn't wanna hear. Taehyung's eyes turned to Nan who was watching you with sympathetic eyes. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to tell you this, but he knew that he'd calm you down in case you happened to have a breakdown. 

"You were crying for help. And you were repeatedly saying that he was gonna kill you…"

Your stomach churned and you yanked yourself away from Taehyung, your feet harshly hitting the wooden floor as you rushed to the bathroom. You threw the toilet lid open and fell to your knees, emptying all the contents of your stomach. Nan followed you and held your hair back, rubbing your back until you were done.

After you composed yourself, you stood up with shaky legs and rinsed your mouth before splashing your face with cold water. 

Your eyes met your own in the mirror, your mind hating the way you were showing pity for your own self. It had been months since you last had an attack related to the bitter memory that was engraved in your mind. You really thought you were getting better.

You were so wrong.

After a minute of self loathing, you went back to your bedroom, leaning against your closet as you stared at the floor. Taehyung stood with his back to you, his eyes dancing over the man who now resided in front of your bed. Nan was gone, leaving you alone with your handsome best friend. 

You really appreciated the presence of these two people in your life, seeing as how others had proved themselves unworthy of your attention.

"Do you think I'll ever get out of it?" You asked in a hushed tone, Taehyung's head turning to face you. He gave you a soft smile before walking towards you. He gently placed a finger under your chin and lifted your head up.

"You're Y/N Y/L/N. You'll always find a way." He stated before kissing your forehead. At times like these, you questioned your feelings for Taehyung. Your heart fluttered but you hushed it down. You hated him for being so good to you. But you also didn't wanna let him go.

Selfish was the only way to describe you.

"Also, should I be worried?" Taehyung asked, eyeing the painting suspiciously as you hummed.

Jimin's eyes stared back at you, making you shiver slightly. Sometimes, you wondered if paintings ever came to life.

Like toy story.

Or night at the museum.

The thought made you giddy and excited. With a firm look at your new favourite masterpiece, you mumbled under your breath and Taehyung's eyes turned to you with a playful glare.

"Maybe…"

Taglist: @csol16 @thanksforthemameries @min-t-posts @xanny91 @silverstitchedsoul @truestrengths @jackgot7lo @jazzytfw @cassiescarlet12 @kpopgirlbtssvt @slut-for-fandoms @kawaiimusiccollection @butwhatsoft @baby-glitch @wickedbutlovely @siphite @vincent-stargogh @sarcasticsmolstiles @khantij @btsarmysvtcarat @pr1nc355y05h1 @sugasheart

As you can see, I'm having trouble tagging a couple people so if you guys see this, I'm so sorry....and let me know if you wanna be tagged? Okay thanks, bye!💖

-XX

[warrencrank]

Why a Private company Site Needs Website optimization

So you're on the road to success to business achievement. You've quite recently made a business site and you can hardly hold back to make that first internet based deal. Your site is amazing as you would like to think and it couldn't be more brilliant and loaded with pictures. It's a slam dunk your deals will quickly increment! A couple of months pass by you're actually pausing. Why aren't individuals visiting my site and why haven't we had as much as a sniff at a deal? While there could be many reasons encompassing this issue, one of the most widely recognized is absence of Website optimization.

Site design improvement makes it simpler for web crawlers, like Google and Hurray, to find, order, record and rank web content. It's normal for entrepreneurs to lay out a site yet not lay out a web presence. Put it along these lines, in the event that your site content isn't streamlined it's equivalent to having a bulletin on a pastry island. It's there yet nobody is looking! It's critical to give fantastic, improved content to get taken note.

Assuming you are engaged with inbound promoting or have an inbound showcasing advisor assisting you with your web based advertising, odds are Web optimization has been utilized. Long island SEO In the event that you're an entrepreneur taking care of your web showcasing and are new to Search engine optimization, tune in up on the grounds that it's significant you comprehend the reason why you want Website design enhancement.

It would require an extremely lengthy investment to introduce the general advantages and Website design enhancement strategies since they are evolving continually. We'll provide you with a short outline of why it's significant and a few basic systems you can use to help your endeavors. It's critical to initially lay out certain catchphrases you would like your site to zero in on that envelop your business. What words are generally important? AdWords.Google.com/select/KeywordToolExternal. To give you a model, say your site depends on exemplary vehicles. At the point when you type in "exemplary vehicles" into the watchword box it returns various related catchphrases. Besides the fact that it returns related watchwords yet it will give how frequently these catchphrases are looked. This is an exceptionally useful instrument to assist you with deciding the catchphrases you maintain that your substance should be engaged around and be certain your refreshing your substance often and seek out this device to remain search ebb and flow.

One more vital piece of your site, that might be absent, is involving catchphrases in your Title Labels, Heading, Passage titles, Meta depiction tag and Alt picture to give some examples. These can be refreshed on the off chance that you approach your site's control board. Presently assuming that you use WordPress you can download a Website optimization pack to make this significantly more straightforward. On the off chance that you're not exactly certain assuming these parts have been upgraded, take a gander at the extremely top blue bar, this is your Title tag. On the off chance that your Title tag isn't catchphrase rich and doesn't give a portrayal of your site, there's a decent chance your site has not be streamlined. To utilize your Title tag for instance, it should be 8-10 words and spotlight on 1-2 watchword phrases. Each page on your site ought to have an extraordinary Title tag.

One more simple method for expanding your Website design enhancement endeavors is to utilize connections to construct traffic. Assuming you're putting out exceptional substance through web-based entertainment promoting or simply remarking on industry related sites, you can make joins back to your site. To get extravagant, you can continuously look through down definitive or significant sites and request a connection trade. You put their connection on your site as well as the other way around. On the off chance that not, hope to compose articles with watchword rich substance and utilize implanted joins in the article that will connect back to important material on your site. There are numerous ways of moving toward this including inbound promoting so it's simply one more straightforward method for getting join traffic.

A few other gainful ways would present your site to free and paid catalogs, work postings, official statements, virtual entertainment accounts, social book stamping and, surprisingly, through member programs. The truth of the matter is regardless of whether you are not educated there are ways of further developing your site's Search engine optimization. The initial step ought to continuously return to exploring watchwords and knowing how to utilize these words or expressions. Independent venture promoting should have a type of Website optimization makeover to make the webpage significant and saw on the web. It demands a few investment and tolerance, experimentation, however the final product will be extremely valuable.

Inbound Advancements assists your business with remaining current in virtual entertainment, site importance, contributing to a blog and numerous different types of inbound showcasing. We will assist your private venture with making instructive substance to draw in perusers and clients. We assist entrepreneurs with advancing their business through virtual entertainment, online journals, external link establishment and web showcasing that will obtain results.

[juliansummerhayes]

My To-Don't list

Good morning from a dark and very quiet Devon -- save the music of course.

It's Sunday.

I don't know but I suspect most people don't get up at this ungodly hour -- why would they? -- but like so often, I'm compelled to do so and luckily I've an abundance of energy that fills my waking hours.

The night's sleep was, well, let's just say pretty rubbish. What with Eddy wanting to go out for a wee, me being too hot and then messaging daughter #3 in Bogata at just after 1 a.m., I reckon I've had two, possibly three hours sleep at best.

But I'm not complaining. Far from it. I feel blessed. Blessed to still be here; blessed to have my health, plus or minus a few decaying joints; and blessed to have the presence and peace of mind to sit and type these few words which even now, despite whatever you think or how they come across, are of supreme importance to me.

Why?

Because they're the only record that will be left of what happened during my unspectacular life -- assuming, of course, that Tumblr doesn't go the same way as so many other now defunct platforms.

The title isn't one that would normally tumble forth. In fact, I'm anything but the go-to guy when it comes to how to live your life. I leave that to others. (Nicholas Bate, Seth Godin and James Clear come to mind.) And yet, as I lay awake this morning, I had this overwhelming sense of wanting to draw up a list of things not to do. Isn't that odd? It is to me given my stance on the absence of free will and choice. (It doesn't exist or not in my bailiwick). And yet, I know that the reason for so many of my spectacular failures hasn't been the inability to get stuff done but instead not being able to stop the rot when it comes to saying no.

Will this year be any different?

I doubt it or at least I wouldn't bet on it, but right after I post this piece to Tumblr and share to Twitter, I'm going to write down a To-Don't List and a To-Do List and compare the two. On the To-Do side, I know that I want to go on the saunter by foot, hence spending a good portion of yesterday checking out YouTube for recommendations for all manner of camping gear. Likewise, I want to start drawing again. And I want to be more specific with my reading.

Now, those things, whilst not terribly exciting, are things I'm capable of and can, for now, be slotted in alongside all my other responsibilities -- oh, the damn moral order.

On the To-Don't side, the one that stands out is to stop buying books and anything else I'm not going to use. There are tips and tricks that I've got up my sleeve to keep my spending down, chief among those to only put everything in the 'basket' and to revisit said site (Amazon mostly) a week or 10 days later. If past form is anything to go by, I'm quite sure by then that I'll decide I don't need to purchase the item that first caught my attention.

And then there's the profanity. It's got to stop. It's not that I'm trying to set myself apart or sound priggish but I've known for a long while that it's started to get out of control and deep down it's not how I'm disposed. Also, it's not necessary, particularly if I'm at ease with myself and my circumstances. It's going to take a great deal of discipline to supplant one word for another but given my love of language, I'm quite sure that I'll find a suitable substitute and one not so heavenly laden with anger, spite and annoyance.

And finally in the mix is silence. That's a bit cryptic but what I'm alluding to is the need not to speak unless I'm spoken to, to fully pay attention to what others are saying and to speak more slowly, which again bears on the need to choose my words wisely.

There are other things that I'm going to write down on the To-Don't side but I'd prefer to keep those private for now if only because they don't just affect me but other people.

I'm not sure if they'll be a follow-up post to this one. I know the template of these things is to report in on the highs, lows, successes and failures but that doesn't interest me so much as trying to make the point, despite all my existential and/or spiritual outpouring, that I'm still human -- or at least that I'm someone who's having a human experience and not some outer body, ethereal aliveness.

As to the rest of the day, I'm hoping to go out with my wife for a drive. I'm not sure where we'll go. It might be the beach or Dartmoor or to Dartington. We stayed in all of yesterday to take the Christmas decorations down and then had a relaxing day with a book and a bit of TV. Daughter #1 will be going back to London tomorrow but she'll be working hard on trying to finish her dissertation for her Masters (architecture). Daughter #2 will be at the boyfriend's working on her final year subjects for her degree (law) or she might come back here to do likewise. In short, even though all of us could do something together, we'll have to make do with a family evening meal where I'll cook something nice for everyone -- vegan of course.

Anyhow, have a lovely day.

Take care.

Julian

Photo by Choong Deng Xiang on Unsplash