#[ everyone can get yourself a slice of the angst today for a single fee of looking at that pained kaeya in the icon and sanity ]

[cryoniic]

“don’t call me that,” he snarls, fury evident behind wine dark eyes. teeth sharp, voice a low growl that erupts from his chest. “you don’t get to call me that.” there is a pause as a chill breeze ruffles the loose strands of his hair that fall around his face. it chills his words, his tone in equal measure that it might cause a shiver; the fire of his gaze turning to cold indifference before it’s cast away entirely. “not anymore.” -- @sicsemper + diluc

𝐻𝐼𝑆 𝐿𝐼𝑃𝑆 𝑊𝐸𝑅𝐸 𝐴𝑆 𝐶𝑅𝐼𝑀𝑆𝑂𝑁 𝑅𝐸𝐷 as the hair of the man who caused the wound. The sting in the corner of his eye, unconfirmed as a cut or the sharp reality of pain -- the liquid in his eye seemed to be threatening to fall. A metallic taste permeates his tongue as he wipes away the string with bruised knuckles. This, all the result from an unforeseeable string of rage.

His heart ached as he looked up into the eyes of the man he had betrayed, feeling the words seep into his core, destroying him piece by piece. His newly discovered vision may have been reflected in how he felt then. Bitter and cold. Despite Kaeya's knowledge that he would not receive a friendly response, he decided to inform him anyway. Eventually, he had to face the truth. Yet, how do you convey to someone you care for the reality that everything they experienced during their years of living and growing together was real, when they were supposed to be nothing more than pawns in a much more profound game?

Catching his breath, gasping for air, his throat dry as he parted his lips to speak, falling short as he brought his palms to the ground beneath him. It was once his home, but now he felt like the equivalent of a stain on the carpets ingrained in his youth and adolescence.

Star-shaped pupil with a dimmer hue now. In Diluc's hands, the blade of his claymore threatened his throat. Wincing, his digits flexed, trying to find a sense of grounding. There was an almost unwelcoming feel to the carpet beneath him, almost inhospitable to those who trespassed on it. Possibly, he was overwhelmed by his newly discovered cryo vision coupled with guilt.

Ironic, for what it was thought to symbolize, the last knife in the back -- but for which one of them? Like a crashing icicle, their lives were shattered. At that very moment, they had lost everything. In addition to destroying himself, Kaeya also brought Diluc down with him.

It was only with whatever his hands could provide, that he was able to stand once more. " --- 'Luc !! --- " He said with a crack in his voice. There was no going back on what had been done. The words of anger, presumably and quite rightly, hatred, behind his tone caused a tear to slip from his blurry eye. After years of loyalty, trust, and commitment between them, a younger Diluc appeared in that blur. Yet, in a flash, it was over again, just as he had ripped away years of friendship.

Still standing on the imaginary fence of where he was supposed to place his foot. Was it with the Father that he was abandoned by at a young age, but with a clear goal, for his own nation? Or, was it with the people and the place in which he was raised? He stood to be struck down one last time, but nothing felt so painful as when Diluc revealed to him he was the villain, a traitor.

The time for apologies and explanations had passed. No longer was he worthy of him. Diluc had given him something no one would ever replace, no matter if their paths may never cross again, Kaeya would never forget what Diluc did for him, or how he made him feel. With Diluc, he felt like he belonged.