#[ GOOD MORNING GUYS ]

[alnilaem]

Ghoap saving their cute little neighbour from her big bad boyfriend, but when she looks up at them with her pursed brows and big wet eyes and puckered lips wrapping around “thank you, thank you,” Ghoap get their wires crossed and spring an aching boner and decide they should keep her. just for a little longer. they’re entitled to her, anyway. she’s indebted to them, and the space between them at night has gotten a little cold.

[dailytogachako]

eepy girlfriends

[filmsdkye]

see i’d believe the “art caused the argument” line if he immediately swooped in and pursed tashi but he doesn’t, it’s years before they get together. He absolutely sowed the seeds of doubt but that’s not why they argue. after the “can we not” (talk about tennis) they don’t bring up art once. Patrick’s resentment at Tashi’s success and his insecurities about going pro come out. Maybe art got them there but that argument was inevitable because they fundamentally do not view tennis the same. “you’re playing percentage tennis, waiting for me to fuck up” that’s exactly what he did. Patrick’s ego was the origin of that argument. I agree though that they are both responsible for her injury and for fucking her life up in general. that’s why she’ll never be able to leave either of them, cause their her only connection to what she was supposed to be.

[figsbass]

on hardwon and moonshine. alternatively titled: on love vs. time

1. war of the foxes, richard siken 2. love & misadventure, lang leav 3. this is how you lose the time war, amal el-mohtar and max gladstone 4. dialogues on love, sue zhao 5. nothing gold can stay, robert frost 6. soft in the middle, shelby eileen 7. love letters or suicide notes, doc luben

[god-has-entered-my-body]

lenaaaaaa god help me I’m so high rn I’m thinking about mpind matty pole dancing ans also giving girlie a lap dance fhis isnt good or my health I think

dont be shy pass the spliff

also mpind comeback after a bunch of wank everyone be happy x

Love me - Matty Healy

A/N: bit wanky, barely spell checked except for @beforeyougo-turnthebiglightoff 's weird sim reactions to whatever i write. Legend anon i hope this is filthy enough for you my love xx

wc: 4.5k

content warnings: smut, fluff, tw: my shitty comedy, handjobs, strip clubs, its george's birthday!!, begging, teasing, lap dance, matty in lingerie pt. 43, mentions of alcohol, lots of swearing, cumplay, grinding, it gets a bit sappy guys soz, sub!Matty

“A strip club? Are you never scared of being a cliché?” you scoff as the venue comes into view, strobing neon flashing in your face. The summer night is warm, a breeze kissing your skin as the gravel crackles under your feet, your quite high heels still not making you taller than George. 

His birthday, the big one eight, was today, and his chosen place was of course, a local strip club.

“If that cliché is seeing half naked girls, no.” he sniggers, Matty’s bickering with Ross and Hann faintly heard behind you. You hook your arm into his as you approach the bouncer, the line surprisingly short. 

“I forget you're an actual man sometimes.”

“How can you possibly forget?!” he lets go, flexing his muscles at you as some sort of display of masculinity, making you giggle behind your hand.

Matty takes this ample opportunity to swoop in from behind, pressing the side of his body up against yours. The four of you watch George proudly present his real I.D to the bouncer, a wide smile on his face as he takes it from him. The bloke gives him a weird once-over, waving him and the rest through without a hitch. 

It's bright inside, but not in the way you would assume. Different colored lights strobe around, switching every 20 seconds or so, the heavy bass of the music thrumming through your veins. Matty hangs on your arm as you look around, George immediately booking it to a booth with a stage as the table, wanting the best front row seat to the show. You roll your eyes at his eagerness, but then again, who could blame him? 

Everyone files into the booth, George ending up wedged in the corner of the seating, uncomfortable but glass he could stretch his legs out under the table. 

“Round of pints on me, happy birthday G. '' Everyone cheers, excluding Hann, who glares at Matty from across the table.

“Oh so now you have money? What about last week?” Ross lets out a quiet snigger, liking this turn of events. 

“Shut up you cunt, it's G’s birthday! Lighten up a bit, old man.” 

“Matty when I get my fucking hands on you-” Ross to the rescue, he presses a hand to his mate’s chest, keeping him seated. 

“Alright girls, break it up.” he gives up, mouthing a curt ‘fuck you’ at Matty, rolling his eyes. 

The waitress returns from the bar, bringing a platter of glasses with her. She sets them down, smiling at you before walking away, the neon lights of the club making her eyes shimmer. 

“Cheers, happy 18th mate.” Matty plants a wet kiss on George’s face, making him squirm away in disgust. 

“Get off you grade A wanker, your girl’s right there.” You blow him a kiss as Matty turns to you, licking a fat stripe up the side of your face, from your jaw to your cheekbone. Everyone at the table groans at his odd display of affection, Ross dramatically shielding his eyes and muttering incoherently as Matty finally sits back down, downing the rest of his pint. 

Sure enough, right in the middle of Hann’s interesting story about his last date, a dancer comes over to the table. She climbs up, eyeing George, twirling around the pole a few times before doing this flip you didn't even know was humanly possible. The bralette she’s wearing glimmers in the light, reflecting off and into your eyes, distracting you.  

George stares blatantly, eyes raking up and down her body as she dances, not letting her leave his line of sight. It's so obvious and she smirks at him, turning her body to face his direction before bending over, exposing her cleavage even more.  

“Don't be a knob.” you hiss, not wanting to seem rude.

“She’s fit and it's quite literally her job!” a small laugh escapes the woman as she goes to speak, flattered at the exchange. 

“It’s alright love, look all you want.” 

“See!” George shouts a bit too loudly, proud of his correctness in strip club etiquette.

You sigh, nodding at her as Matty pokes your side. 

“She is fit.” you whisper quietly, gesturing to her. Matty perks up, shoving you in offense.

“I'm fitter, don't forget.” you giggle at the statement, refusing to give him the satisfaction of agreeing with him.  

“She’s literally sparkling, I need to know what brand that is.” The rhinestone adorned lingerie set she was wearing captivated everyone at the table, hugging her curves in all the right places.  

“Who’s to say I'm not either?” your eyes widen slightly at the implication, but you brush him off.

“Shut it, don't be a tosser.” his hand grips yours right before he speaks, bringing it down to the waistband of his jeans. “I’m not.”

He uses your fingers to pull it down about an inch, revealing a pretty string of purple under his bottoms. Your breath hitches at the realization, eyes snapping up to meet his. Was he serious? Now?

“It’s George’s birthday.” you state, voice hushed so the others could overhear your conversation. Hann was already off to buy another round, leaving Ross and George to make ‘friendly’ conversation with the dancer, shamelessly staring at her tits the entire time. “He won't mind, just look at him.” 

Sure enough, George is ogling the dancer, lips parted and being such a boy it hurts. She’s clearly enjoying the attention as he leans forward, stuffing a wad of cash into the flimsy waistband of her thong, smirking. 

“He’s already imagining a future with her, look!”

She sets a paper crown on his head with the words ‘birthday boy’ on it, giving him a small kiss on the cheek. A boyish blush spreads onto George’s face as her kiss leaves a mark of lipstick, Ross quickly snapping a photo of him to take the piss when they left.   

“He desperately needs a lay, it's sad.” you comment, knowing it had been ages since his last girlfriend or even hookup, too focused on his coursework and music to go out more than the few times you forced him to. 

“So do I, so I'd prefer it if we didn't drag this out.” 

Matty gets up, climbing over you despite your quite loud protests, announcing his trip to the dance floor. You wait a few moments before following him, the sway of his hips and faint back muscles under his mesh shirt flexing as he walks, convincing you to just go with it, hoping whatever he had planned wasn't totally scandalous and wouldn't get you kicked out of the place. 

He turns right past the dance floor, leading you into a narrow corridor off to the side. You catch up to him, close behind him as he slips a dancer some cash, nodding as he makes his way to the door at the end of the hall. Matty rushes in before you, the door almost slamming in your face. ‘Private room’ flashes back at you in yellow neon, making you raise your eyebrows.

The room is dark for the first few seconds as you hear Matty shuffling. Suddenly, the room lights up, giant mirrors covering the walls and ceiling, reflecting the light back and forth. You glance around, eyes landing on Matty. 

A tall pole is the centerpiece of the room, pink metal running from the floor to the ceiling. Matty leans on it, left hand wrapping around it as he spins, smirking at you as you watch him, something stirring inside of you. 

“Did you plan this?” you ask, a skeptical look on your face.

“Maybe.” his fingers run up his chest, playing with his nipples right in front of you. His voice drips with lust, coating your mind with only a few words, making it difficult to get even semi-coherent sentences out.

“Jesus, you're mental.” you gasp softly as he moves, fluid and sure, captivating you with every change of direction.

“But you love me, now sit.” you listen, not knowing what else you were meant to do in this situation. The chair is soft, cushions letting you settle in comfortably. 

“Everything is so pink.” you mutter, gesturing to the mirror frames and pole, every surface some variation of the same color.

“Sort of the point, yeah? To set the mood.” he smirks, trailing his hands up his waist, letting his nails graze against his skin, mimicking the same thing you do to him. “Mood for what?”

“You’ll see, be patient.” you roll your eyes at his words, the palms of your hands rubbing against the soft pillow of your chair. “That's rich.” 

“Please, for me?” He sounds so sweet, like he was asking you to bring him a glass of water, not to stay still while he touched himself in front of you. 

“We both know I can't deny you.” 

“How true.” he sucks in a deep breath, throwing his head back as he holds eye contact. 

“Watch.” 

“What do I-?” you stutter over your words, your heart beating rapidly against your chest as he feels himself up, fingers ghosting over his tattoos.

“Me, keep your eyes on me.”

He turns his attention back to the pole next to him, strutting around it as the music from the dancefloor dictates his movements, his back pressed to the cool metal. Matty parts his lips as he slides down it, running a hand over his chest performatively, watching your every reaction. 

Your breathing becomes more shallow as he moves, thousands of fantasies running through your mind. He knows the effect he has on you, everything he does is purely to rile you up, make you lose your composure. 

“You’re mad, this is-” he cuts you off with a sly smile.

“Incredibly hot? I’d rather you enjoy the show than talk over it.” you scrunch up your face at the implication that this was a performance, even if you did expect nothing less from Matty. 

“Show?”

He runs a hand through his slightly messed up hair, showing off his neck as you stare at him, biting your lip between your teeth to keep from embarrassing yourself. 

“I hate you.” you mumble as the music changes, some hip-hop song coming on. The faint cheers of the people outside are barely audible, but it serves to remind of just where you were. The guys were still at the table, most likely speculating the reason as to why the two of you have been missing that long, Ross surely already making crude comments that neither Hann nor George wanted to think about.

“You won't if you just wait.” you grip the edge of your seat, blushing profusely as he struts over to you, wrapping his arms around your neck. His breath is hot against your neck, leaning over you as he settles into your lap. You finally clock it.  

“Stay still.” he ‘orders’, attempting to mimic the way you speak to him when he doesn't listen.

“Are you giving me a lap dance?” he frowns at you, shaking his head in disappointment. A chuckle escapes you as the reality of the situation dawns on you. 

“No need to define it darling, let it be abstract.” of course he’d say something like that, try to salvage the ‘artistic’ affair, failing miserably. 

“You’re giving me a fucking lapdance, christ.” it's genuinely amusing. Your heart swells up at the thought of all the effort that went into this. Paying off the dancer with god only knows how much money, turning you on at the table just enough so you’d follow him, and probably even setting up the lighting in the room himself. 

“You're such a bore, let me have my fun.” he kisses you, giggling into your mouth. His lips are warm against yours, your lip gloss rubbing off on him. “Oh, I will.” you promise, letting your hands fall limp as he grips your shoulders, rocking his hips back and forth. His movements are exact, practiced even as he grinds down onto you before lifting his body back up, bringing his hip tattoo up to eye level. 

You don't think, mind clouded with desire and want. His shirt had ridden up a bit, and your rough tongue drags across the inked skin, warm against it as he shudders, feeling his cock twitch in his pants at the sensation. 

“No touching the dancers” he tuts, coming back down on top of you.

“I’m exempt from that rule.” you say, your voice surprisingly steady despite the white hot heat pooling between your legs.

“According to whom?” 

“You.”

You let your hands settle onto his waist, gripping him so hard you were sure there’d be bruises the next day.

“Fuckk, yeah okay,” he groans, the pressure on the front of his jeans increasing as all the blood in his head rushes south, his mind hazy. 

“C’mon baby, finish your little performance.”

He moves to get off, smirking as you let him. You can see indents in his skin where you grabbed him, the sight making your breath hitch. He circles around you like a predator does his prey, wrapping his arms around you from behind. 

His hands trail up your chest, fingers grazing over your exposed collarbones. Your skin flushes under his touch and you let out a soft moan at the feeling, earning a proud smile from Matty. 

“You’re so gorgeous. I have to force myself to not get hard whenever you look at me.” his voice is sultry against your ear, making goosebumps bloom on the skin of your neck. “Oh, way to exaggerate.” you snigger, not quite believing him. 

“Honest truth.” he swears, instinctively doing the ‘scouts honor’ sign with his hand. 

You snort, your little giggling fit interrupted by his mouth trailing sickly sweet kisses up your neck and to your jaw.

It doesn't take him long to make his way back around, your heart skipping a beat when he comes back into view. His chest is glistening with sweat, the warm temperature of the room clearly getting to him. Most notably, you notice the front of his jeans is unbuttoned and unzipped, flaring out on both sides, revealing almost the entirety of the silky, purple panties he had chosen to wear. 

He relishes in your reaction, the attention making his ego grow exponentially as he moves back into your lap. Your hands trail up his chest, doing your best to not immediately pay attention to the underwear. You can't resist, though. 

“These are new.” you toy with the thin straps, silk reflecting the colored light beautifully. You can see a note of pride ripple through him as you admire the material, grazing his cock through it.

“Got them just for you, you like?” The question is so obviously rhetorical. Of course you like, no, love them. “So much.” your words are laced with love, soft and appreciative of all the effort he puts into getting you off, fulfilling your fantasy.

The way he looks at you is sinful, thoughts dancing behind his eyes visible as he stares, waiting for your next move.

He lets out a soft groan when you push him down into your thigh, biting his lip at you provocatively. “You're hard.” you smile as you say the words, his gaze softening when he sees the blissed out look at your face, eyes raking over his body. Even (almost) fully clothed, he was absolutely beautiful. 

“See? Wasn't lying.” he presses a kiss behind your left ear, gently moving your hair out of the way. It’s loving, so honest. “You sure it's not because of the mirror behind me?” you still cant help but tease him, gesturing to the giant mirror your back was facing. He blushes in response, stealing a glance at his reflection. 

“You’re so cruel! I’ll just stop then, seeing as all you see me as is some egotistical deviant.” he threatens, crossing his arms over his chest in retaliation. You bring a hand up to cup his face, stroking his cheek softly, almost patronizing. Your mind swims with the power you have over him. 

“You wont stop, you couldn't if you tried.” For the first time that evening, you call his bluff, the way he reacts to you exquisite as his lips part, no words coming out. Silence fills the room, even the music on the other side of the door seeming to die down. How long have the two of you been here?

“Am i right?” you question, not letting him off the hook like you usually would.  

“..yeah–” his words are small, and you know you have him right where you want him. The lightest, slightest touch could send him hurtling over the edge, his hips rutting desperately into your hand as you palm him through his underwear.

“So pretty for me, doing all of this. Thank you baby.” you whisper into his ear as he gasps under your touch. It's so incredibly intimate that you can't help but drop your facade for a few seconds, kissing him sweetly, his lips moving against yours with desperation.  

“Anything for you.”

“Anything?”

“Mhm.”

You take his cock out of the confines of his underwear, a sigh of relief falling from his parted lips as your fingers ghost over the tip, teasing him. 

“Just stay still, let me make you feel good.” you murmur, feeling him up under his shirt, your nails digging into the skin of his back. He shifts on top of you, his body yearning for your touch.

“Please.”

You reach down to wrap your manicured fingers around his cock, the sight of the pretty colors of your nails around him making his eyes roll back in his head, his mind spinning with all sorts of possibilities, mostly focused on not finishing right in that moment. 

Tugging lazily on his cock, you drag your fingers from the base to the tip, a satisfying whimper spilling from Matty’s lips, the sound spreading through your entire body. His back arches against you and the kiss he presses against your mouth tastes like the cigarettes he chainsmoked on the way to the club, mixing deliciously with the hint of alcohol on his breath. 

“Let go for me, feel it.”

He trembles, the noise he lets out is desperate, filthy, shooting straight to your core. Everything is heightened. You can feel his breath on your cheek as he leans forward into you, chest pressing against yours as you run your fist up and down his cock, small whimpers of pleasure spurring you on. 

“Fuckk, that feels so good–” 

Matty’s words are choked, his effort to hold back a bit obvious. He’s hungry, wanting, evident in the way he ruts into your hand, his fingers digging into the skin of your shoulders, the sharp pain making you sigh, pleased. 

“Be nice and loud for me, let me hear you.” you coo into his ear, your free hand dragging up his back under his shirt, the mesh bunching up. “So good to me, treat me so well, god– shit.”

He twitches as you dig your thumb into his slit, a shiver spreading through his body 

The way he’s not even undressed is obscene, the fabric of his jeans gathering under his hips as he’s perched on top of you, feet planted firmly on the floor for leverage. You watch him, engrossed in pleasure, completely blissed out expression on his face. His head is thrown back, exposing his pale neck, faded hickeys and marks still visible from your last encounter. 

“You're staring” he breathes, your eyes snapping up to meet him. A filthy grin tugs at the corners of his lips, your focus on him and only him. His hair falls over his face, obscuring it slightly, much to your disdain.  

“You're giving me reason to” you brush curls out of his face as your movements still, letting him speak properly, uninterrupted. 

“Yeah, I want you to look at me.”

You smile lovingly, cocking your head slightly to the left as you tease him, one of your fingers twirling his hair. 

“Gets you off, my attention?” he doesn't even try to deny it, knowing it wouldn't get him anywhere. 

“Mhm-m” he nods, panting. His chest heaves with every breath he takes, silently begging you to continue.

His hips stutter as you grip his cock tighter, your other hand stroking his face sweetly as you stare into each other's eyes, his face flush as pornographic moans spill from his lips. His back arches again, your bodies pressed against each other as your hand snakes between the two of you.

“F-fuck, i’m so close, please let me cum, please.” His voice is high-pitched and whiny, tears threatening to spill at the overwhelming pleasure. 

“You beg so nicely, let me hear you baby.” you whisper words of encouragement as his hips buck up into your hand involuntarily, every ounce of self control in him dissipating. 

“I need it so bad, please i've been so good for you.”

He hiccups in a way that almost makes you feel bad, his desperation so obvious. You speed up a bit, just a bit, giving him that sweet, sweet relief he’s been begging for for god knows how long now.

“P-please, oh fuck, yesyesyes fuck.” precum bubbles at the tip of his cock, and you smear it down, coating him in his own arousal. It's unbelievably hot, his entire body twitching at the sight of your fingers on his cock, a sight he desperately tries to commit to memory. 

“You’re leaking all over my hand darling, so filthy.” he whines into your neck, and you lick across his jaw, making him shiver

“Make a mess, c’mon, come for me.” an animalistic groan fills your ears as he rapidly approaches his orgasm, writhing under your touch.

“Y-yeah– fuck thats so good, your hand feels so good, fucking made for me.”

Matty’s possessive nature made your head spin with lust, his eyeliner smudging down his face as he stares into your eyes with such an intensity it felt like he was going to consume you.

His skin glows under the soft pink lighting, making him seem ethereal, like a true angel. His noises are like music to your ears as he spills into your hand, spurts of cum coating your bare stomach, barely missing your (quite expensive) cropped shirt. Matty kisses you immediately after, hands threading through your hair as he drinks you in, stealing your breath straight from your lungs. 

Wordlessly, one of his hands moves down, gathering the remnants of his orgasm onto two fingers, tapping your mouth with the other. You indulge him, parting your lips to let him push his digits past them, the salty taste of him taking over your senses. His pupils are completely blown out in desire, not able to process what was happening in front of him, a loopy smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, his eyes crinkling in that way that made your heart swell up with love 

“Perfect.” he mumbles as you lick his fingers clean, smiling mischievously at his dazed gaze. Matty pulls you in, holding you close, desperate to not let go.

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Where were you two?” Ross’s voice is accusatory as the two of you finally return to the booth, the dancer from before having already left. A faint blush spreads onto your cheeks as the memories of not 20 minutes go flash through your mind. Hann doesn't help your situation at all.

“Probably shagging, just look at him.” your head turns, seeing Matty’s blissed out expression, a content smile replacing his usual nasty grin. You elbow him in the ribs, a silent plea to say something, but he promptly ignores your silent begging. 

“Shut up you dickhead, you don't know shit.” 

George points at Matty, now grinning wildly, reminiscing about the events of tonight. He’s oddly calm, which would be concerning if it wasn't for the monstrous case of post-sex hair he currently had 

“Jesus, what did you even do to him?” George is taking the absolute piss out of you, and for good enough reason. 

“I don't kiss and tell.” you attempt to change the conversation topic as you settle back into the booth, commenting on the pint glasses. You're ignored in favor of laughing at you further while matty remains completely unbothered, the glow he emitted so fucking obvious it hurt.  

“Well he sure does, I've heard much more than necessary.” Ross sniggers, pulling a face at the not-so-distant memory of Matty’s sex bonfire-storytelling session that had happened a few weeks prior (not at an actual bonfire, but on the floor of your living room, completely pissed while you were out with your girlfriends.)

“Did you at least wash your hands?” Hann asks, the question directed at Matty, whose hands were loosely wrapped around his nearly empty pint glass. 

“Didn't have to.” he grins, waving his hands in Adam’s face proudly, like it was some sort of achievement. 

“Oh fucking hell, too much info.” George groans, cupping his face in his hands at the mental image of what he thought had just happened. You laugh inwardly, the whole situation absurd. This was the furthest you had ever gotten in discussing anything relating to your relationship with Matty, and it honestly felt weird.

“I’m never touching you again mate, no fucking way.” Ross stated, a disgusted look on his face. “Awwe Ross, how will you do without my touch?” You make grabby hands at him, climbing over George to drape yourself over the booth, touching his hair and face, Matty’s and Hann’s hysterical laughter spurring you on. “GET OFF ME!!” he yells, clawing at you to push you away, absolutely mortified. 

George, slightly more pissed than the rest of you, announces his mission to get the dancers number, swearing up and down that “She had this look in her eye, i’m so fucking serious.” he manages to stumble over his shoes about three times before finally standing up straight, brushing off any ‘dust’ (crisps) that clung to his raggedy band tee. 

“Good luck mate, not that you need it.” Hann tries to be encouraging, knowing just as well as the rest of you how George got when he had a few too many pints. Terribly emotional and impulsive, there was no stopping him once he had his sights set on something, or in this case, someone.

“I definitely don't” he glares at you over his shoulder, strutting across the dance floor in direction of where he’d last seen her. 

As he walks away, Ross sniggers.

“He definitely does.” and you can't help but giggle along as he trips over a stray stair, falling right onto his face. Hann goes to help him up, ignoring your collective jeers to “Stop ruining his chances at true love!”

With an ice pack pressed to his face, George can only roll his eyes at the various comments for the rest of the night, despite it being his birthday.

[nat-but-free]

eepy

[mask-duo]

Hes kinda serving teaching assistant for a class you don't actually want to take but you see him and then it quickly becomes your favorite subject but you spend most of your time in class just gawking at him so that you can stay behind and ask him questions and maybe flirt with him but all he does is blush really easily and you don't know whether you want to bend over that desk for him or bend him over

[smolbeanjerma]

[hawnkoii]

(TW: Mentions of d€@**th + r@**p€ threats, incest, NSFW)

@cherrysuzaku / @serenesaku the things you have lied about on my name.

I have heard and read everything and I have never heard bigger lies in my life. I have been informed of what you told people behind my back, telling them i know things that I genuinely was not aware of just so you can paint me as a bad person. If you’re going to lie about something, at least try to make it sound believable. I should be showing all of our discord messages, showing everyone how you made weird fetishized cuck headcanons of my oc watching your oc, Hanako, and Urogi have sex. I should show them the oc you drew and attempted to ship him with Sumine. I should show everyone how you kept bugging me to draw you something, and if the commission came out bad, you wouldn’t pay me for it. I will show a glimpse of our messages below 👇 because there will be some to accuse me of aimlessly talking out of my ass with no proof. (Warning: NSFW)

I did not say anything at the time since I felt like I was overthinking, and others didn’t complain about you. I did not say anything as I did not speak to many people in the community at the time, and I wanted to keep and make mutuals. I did get petty, as shown in the screenshot, because i was tired of your constant weird headcanons. Should I have said flat out I didn’t like it? Yes, I should have, but I didn’t want to come off as a prude. I felt bad cause i felt like I just scolded you, so i followed up by saying “it’s not a big deal”. I tried to leave subtle hints that I didn’t like it, not that I want to gatekeep the character, but I hated how you put my oc down like that. Your attempt to pull my oc away, make my oc look bad, make ME look bad, and literally bother me to make an oc x oc ship with you after I said NO a billion times is disgusting. I always wondered why no one ever complained about you, which is why I stayed silent and tried to get along with you. I’m tired of it. Thursday was my birthday and I tried to be positive but I couldn’t because of how you literally lied to people about me, leading to de**th threats, r**pe threats, and rude messages due to people thinking i was the troll, and then you have the audacity to ask me if i had a good birthday. Hell no i did not.

If there is one thing I genuinely regret now, is how I was so blind to your behavior. I don’t believe it, and I can’t believe I stayed up late a few months ago to draw you something for your birthday because I really cared for you. Have you ever cared for me in the same way I used to care about you? What were you going to do for my birthday other than be a manipulative liar that purposely left out information to me so I, and others, could sympathize with you. I wish I knew the full story so I didn’t just blindly side with you and think others were bad. You realize I saw terrible (now confirmed fake) screenshots of someone potentially being racist and straight up rude, so obviously I made insults the same way you were insulting others (they will not be name dropped). You took advantage of my vulnerability with you, victimized yourself, and I’ll never forgive you for that. You are not a victim Serene, but maybe a victim of your own delusions and ego. I am an adult as well, but remember our difference in maturity. The mental gap between an 18 yr old (I am now 19) and a 24 yr old. Your frontal lobe is more developed than mine, and pretty close to being fully developed and making better conscious decisions.

Because of your lies and how you led people on, I can’t stop getting d€@*th and r**pe threats. Am I saying that you are at fault for other’s behavior? No, i am not. But you have repeated this process so many times with others and you just don’t seem to learn. At some point your victim complex is going to lead to others getting hurt. Telling me to block and not talk to certain people, yet you go behind my back and talk to those very people yourself to incriminate me. Why did you do that? So I don’t talk and share my side of the story and you can keep me in the dark and have someone to blame? It seems like this is the reason because once I got in touch with these said people you told me not to communicate with, we realized we shared similar issues we had with you. I was relieved to hear I wasn’t the only one that was treated this way by you, and I stayed silent initially because I just didn’t want to be that guy, and because you seemed to be on good terms with a lot of people in the community. I have noticed a good chunk of the people in your server have either blocked or unfollowed me. Have you told them whole truth, Serene? Or have you just told them enough so they sympathize with you. People that have similar experiences with you can be silent about you, as it is their own story to tell when they feel comfortable, but I will not be silent about you anymore @cherrysuzaku

I would speak to you in private about this, but you have proved to me that you are not a trustable or reliable person, and I know that you will just respond with “I’m sorry” or by freaking out. You are not listening to me.

“I’m sorry” “I’m sorry” “I’m sorry” “I’m sorry” “I’m sorry” and then you never fix your behavior. If you are going to be on hiatus, LEARN something before you come back and don’t just feel sorry for yourself.

Now you are going after my friends and repeating this chain of behavior with them, leaching onto them for what I can assume is free art, which I see you have gotten unfortunately. I see you asking them weird questions and trying to form an oc x oc ship with them as well. I have seen you create an oc to ship with their oc that is already taken. God knows who else you are acting this way to. I am not stupid, Serene. The second you were pushed away by one trio that felt uncomfortable with your behavior, you try to nudge your way into mine. Don’t think I didn’t notice how less you spoke to me during that time you were all ‘buddy-buddy’ with the first trio you tried to be with. I am not one to gatekeep people, but as soon as my friends told me what you were saying to them in private, I had an internal panic. I knew exactly what you were doing the second you tried to butter up my friend with some fanart. And ofc when i recently blocked you, you go to others to complain, as I have seen, looking for someone to feel pity for you. I have tried to let the weekend pass while i deleted my Tumblr app, i have reported messages, but the threats of people saying they want to “destroy every hole in my body” and that my mother “should have ab0rted me” is too much. And that’s not even the worst message. These threats have spread to my instagram DMs. Again, i am not 100% blaming you for this Serene, but what you have said has led to this, even if you didn’t want it to go this far. It’s a permanent scar on my emotional state and my reputation, so why should I let you go?

I will also mention your neediness. When I made some fanart for my friends, this is how you reacted (first image):

(Sorry for the constant pfp change from me)

Instead of supporting my art, you made me feel terrible. I felt so bad here, but I didn’t know what else you wanted me to do. I just wanted to have fun in the community and make people I feel comfortable with feel happy as well. And if my memory serves me correctly, this is not your first time freaking out to me when I make art for friends, and it just comes off as jealousy, honestly. (2nd screenshot) Shamelessly during messages you would just randomly ask for free art and guilt trip me. Like, come on, you should just know not to do that, even if you were trying to joke. In the 3rd screenshot shown, you wanted to ship my Urogi fankid with your Urogi fankid. Why would you even suggest incest or bring it up? Not to mention you blatantly stealing character designs from me and my friends, and stealing my oc’s name shamelessly. I would think it was an accident, but as I have heard from others, you have done this before. You have stolen character concepts from others. Not to mention you even admit to knowing/feeling like you’re stealing. If you know, then stop. I shouldn’t have to tell a grown woman how to act.

Reasonable crashout from me. I will not be a pushover this time and allow myself to be threatened and slandered. I have allowed this behavior for too long. Gmfu if you think i’m letting anyone talk down on me online. I do not wish to be silent anymore, so I did not consult anyone before speaking on this. I am writing this so that people would not harass Serene back, but just be wary. I have heard her do so much worse to others, but for now it is not my right to say it since it is not my story or experience. You are not a good person Serene, and never a good 'friend' to me. If you had my best interest in mind, you wouldn’t have done the things you did, and try to accuse me of being the troll. You have genuine problem, Serene. I’m saying this in the nicest way possible, please get therapy if you have not already gotten it. And if you have, I hope you feel better soon.

[good-morning-guys]

11/8

[jiraisupportgroup]

hi!! is it so wrong to be a young jirai?

i feel so young in this community and idk what to do.. it feels like if people knew my true age theyd shame me or something. i respect the lifestyle and have felt the most comfort here than ever, but im so scared of people finding out my age and just blocking me

There isn’t anything particularly wrong with being young and in spaces like this - a lot of older people just don’t want to interact with minors for their own comfort (& vice versa). I can’t speak for everyone but there’s a lot of reasons for this. Especially in spaces based around mental health (and even more so with Jirai Kei being a space which isn’t inherently recovery based).

A lot of older landmines will talk about or RB things that are sexual in nature & it can feel kind of weird or gross when people who are much younger interact with posts about that stuff. Some people are also afraid because technically you can get in actual trouble if you’re posting nsfw content and knowing that minors follow you / will see it - although functionally there are hardly ever legal repercussions for this. It can still feel icky.

A lot of older landmines also just have trouble relating to younger landmines - our struggles might be similar but there can also be a lot of differences it really depends on the situation. Like a 20 year old and a 15 year old dealing with even the same issues can look extremely different, and sometimes we just can’t relate. Also the language that we use tends to be a bit different. I notice that it’s much more common for younger people to use more heavily romanticized language when talking about certain issues and a lot of older people can’t really relate because a lot of us are at a point where we’re just so defeated and sick of it. I don’t know how to explain this without giving examples but younger people make certain things look fun and new and exciting and like a thing to do while some of us older people have long past that phase and it’s just like a crushing reality for us at this point. It’s not fun anymore. And seeing people have fun with it can be upsetting for a number of reasons. That’s not specific to minors it’s just kind of a trend I’ve noticed. (I don’t know if I explained that well at all)

Another thing (and idk if this is just me) is that seeing teenagers talk about the same issues we have / had as a teenager is genuinely gut wrenching sometimes. It can be really hard to watch young people go down the same paths we went down and just wanting to scream at them to stop and turn back but knowing there is not a single thing we can do to help them - it can feel extremely disheartening sometimes. Especially on Tumblr bc a lot of us grew up on Tumblr and our illnesses were heavily influenced by the mental health spaces we were in on Tumblr & I mean for me at least I can confidently say that it had a negative impact on my mental health as a teenager and now being older it’s like aaaa fuck I don’t want the vents or things I post being shown to teenagers who could be negatively impacted by it just like I was at their age. Real Catcher in the Rye moment.

& some people just don’t really want to interact with minors. The differences between even 18 year olds and 15 year olds are pretty big. I mean I’m 24 and like I don’t really hang out in real life with people under 19 just kind of naturally - like not in “oh you’re only 18 we can’t hang out” kind of way but we just genuinely tend not to vibe. But again that’s just my personal experience so it’s super different for everyone.

There’s also a lot of minors who don’t want anyone who’s over 18 interacting with them for similar reasons. Often times it’s protection, but a lot of minors find adults annoying or not super relatable, which is just as valid.

Tldr: everyone has different comfort levels. It’s not that you’re doing anything wrong or that people just automatically hate you bc of your age, it’s more so like the difference between teenagers & 20 year olds can be pretty big so sometimes they don’t want to interact with each other.

[the-problemattic]

thursday, 09/05/2024

[clockworkvampyre]

caffeine isn’t enough i need to chew on enoch drebber and then get electrocuted

[trumanblacks]

but actually goodnight from me

[wildbluesorbit]

Its never too early to suffer ig😭😭

[thicc-mothman]

godbless this site and its way of spreading the news